#so garak goes back and both of them have changed and they have to adjust to that

[sebastianmercier]

Mamma Mia where the only two characters are Garak and Bashir and it’s just them performing the songs together.

[pollyna]

Garak arrival at Tarak Nor doesn't go unnoticed but, even if he's in exile, he's still Tain's protege and everyone and their mothers are afraid of him. So he has more free time than ever, his new job is relatively easily once he learns how to do it and trying to kill Gul Dukat is fulfilling for just a couple of hours the first week he's on the station. The man is quiet boring and not important enough to really attempt to his life.

Garak's day is spent sewing, reading, eating food that doesn't taste of much and hoarding secrets, one after another. But, even if he speaks most of the Kardasi's dialect and a good number of other languages, bajoran is almost alien for him. It takes him weeks to really understood a full sentence, during a lunch between two workers, and his life would be a little less miserable if he had, like everybody else, a UT but it doesn't work well with Tain's implant and the implant is more important than is own life.

By the time Tarak Nor becomes Deep Space 9 and Bajor is free, Garak knows how to speak Bajoran and three of it's dialect, Standard, a decent amount of Trill, Japanese and Arabic. For them, for the Federation just as for his fellow cardassians, there's no reason to think he doesn't have the UT and that he actually speaks all that languages.

After all the mess with the implant, doctor Bashir little trip to find Tain and a solution to save him, some adjustment to his quarters, is captain Sisko who asks him about the lack of UT and Garak laughs in his face with the little grace he has left. They don't dispense them for plain, simple tailors captain. Nobody tried to talk about him about it or to talk to him in general.

It's routine goes back to the one he had with the Cardassian's around, sewing, eating food that doesn't taste like much, reading to many books and trying to exercise a little, in the middle of the night when sleep doesn't come and the pain makes him almost blind(*). Odo still checks on him and Quark tries to sell him replicated liquor, that he swears, come directly from the capital of Cardassia Prime. The first smirk is almost disappointed when he doesn't do much else than his work and the second persists until Garak doesn't spend almost an hour straying at him, directly in his eyes, without telling a word. Apparently he hasn't lost his touch when it come to intimidation practice.

Garak is in the middle of a discussion with a Bolian man about the cut of his pants when doctor Bashir enters his store. Garak smiles at him, always polite and compose because he's a client, before turning his attention to the other man. After forty five minutes of discussion they finally find an idea that please both of them, Garak takes a break before his next costumer and he can almost forget about doctor Bashir still being there.

The number of language you can speak is astonishing Garak and oh boy, he really wants to have a conversation, doesn't he? More than enough, doctor he smiles, now, what can I do for you today? New suit or do you need another extravagant costume for your holosuit games?

No, I'm here because I wanted to ask you if you want to have lunch with me? Maybe today? ha asks and he almost seems to stand taller while he speaks.

I have to much work to do, doctor. But thank you the same for the invitation. Why his clients are always late? He has another three and then a bride before closing for the night and doesn't want to take other work to his quarters.

I- Garak, please. I know the last month I've been cancelling our lunches but- believe me when I say it was for a good cause.

I'm sure of it, doctor. That doesn't change I have a half dozen of pants to adjust, two betazoid clients coming in for two new dresses each and a Vulcan bride who's particular picky about the shade of her dress. Maybe next week. And gods be blessed because one the betazoid woman decides to arrive just in that moment and cut off their conversation. He barley notice doctor Bashir leaving the establishment. Or, at least, it what he likes to think.

The Vulcan bride leaves the shop but she doesn't take with her the headache she caused him. Cardassians may speak in circle but Vulcans are no better with their "truth". At the end Garak has to take some work to do in his quarters anyway.

The next morning, waiting for him in front of his shop, is Odo and what it follows is the most strange and peculiar breakfast he has ever had. And he had sat at the same table with the heads of, almost, every secret agency in the Alpha Quadrant.

To that it follows a lunch with commander Dax and a reluctant major Kira, who spends the entire hour alternating between looking at him waiting for a mistake and asking him about a particular fabric for a dress she would like to order from him. And then a breakfast with Quark and Odo, a lunch with Keiko and Molly, filled with pretty drawings, long talks about plants and the promise to help her to create a space for Cardssian's flower and, maybe, to look after Molly a couple of times.

In the next two weeks Garak eats with everyone, even captain Sisko and his son, a boy too tall for his own age. But not with doctor Bashir. After the Vulcan bride problem is solved he decides to go to find the Doctor, maybe to say sorry, think about how much he missed him, and maybe the could grab a bite together if he isn't busy?

What he isn't expecting, when he chimes to Julian's door, is to find the man listening to a recorded lesson of Kardasi, while repeating some of the sentences.

Doctor Bashir? Are you going to leave Deep Space 9 to live on Cardassia?

Garak! Oh god, I was hoping to have a little more time... he answers, looking almost embarrassed.

For what exactly doctor?

When we took care of the implant I realized you didn't have an UT and I asked captain Sisko if we could procure one for you because it could have been simpler for you? Just after I realized you didn't need help because you were speaking everyone's language without problems, but no one was talking yours. And I, sorta?, decided to learn Kardasi but it took me more time that I would ever imagined and a month went by and the others decided to help? I didn't even have to ask, they did all themselves and gave me a little more time to study but I still don't grasp it enough to have a serious conversation...

Oh dear doctor, you didn't have to go and learn kardasi for me! I would have continued to talk your language without any problem!

But I wanted to. And I learned about a little about your culture and about the meaning behind all that arguing at lunch. And I would like to invite you to another one, maybe tomorrow? If you have resolved your Vulcan bridezilla problem, obviously.

Garak doesn't remember the last time his cheeks felt so hot all at once. I would be delighted, my dear. And, perhaps, I could tell you some about my Vulcan bridezilla problem.

I would be perfect, Garak. he answers before kissing him on his forehead.

—

Garak's routine doesn't change much after their first date, he still sewing, eating food that doesn't taste of much, read books but now they're from all over the galaxy and in every language he speaks. He's still learning new languages and existing without a UT. But now he rarely spends a lunch alone sometimes he gets invited to dinner by Keiko or Capitan Sisko. When he doesn't sleep and everything hurts to much there always are a couple of hands shooting his ache and talking him down most of his nightmares.

Deep Space 9 it still to damn cold and distant from what he defines has home but it's something he could learn to live, because now is not alone anymore.

(*) I don't honestly know if there's some equivalent of the Italian sentence "non vederci più dal dolore" but it seemed the most appropriate translation.

[sym-biont]

Leave Our Troubles In The Sand (1132 words) - Just a tiny little thing for @garashirweek day 3: Holidays/Vacations/Spending Time Together. I've always been super intimidated about writing Garak so hopefully this isn't too awful. Read it on AO3.

Garak isn’t sure what he had expected, really. They drift through the streets at a leisurely pace as the planet’s sun rises to its highest point. He can feel its alien warmth seeping into his skin and the surrounding scales but despite it being this regions Summer season, he finds that it’s still a little cold for his own tastes, adjusting the scarf wound around his neck with practised care. 

Julian, however, seems to be in his element - striding ahead through the crowds when he forgets to keep his pace measured and matching Garak’s steps. His voice rises loud and clear above the other snatches of conversation and bustle of the streets, as he explains each building and each piece of architecture, his cheeks glowing from the heat of the day and exertion. He is the picture of happiness - face relaxed and open, his mouth curved up into a wide but soft smile. Garak’s heart aches at the sight and he quickens his pace to keep up with his long-legged companion, huffing a little with the effort.

‘How about we stop for some brunch,’ Julian says, stopping so suddenly in the middle of the street that Garak almost walks into him. His voice is low and quiet and nothing like he’d been just moments before, Garak notes as he neatly steps around to Julian’s elbow and letting his fingertips trail across the small of Julian’s back – questioning and giving his support in one. The Universal Translator stumbles over that word - some kind of meal between a human’s breakfast and lunch, at the same time as Garak’s own mind stumbles at Julian’s obvious change in mood.

‘Lead the way,’ he replies quickly enough to mask the way his mind is racing, curving his lips into a smile and ducking his head benignly even as his heart aches. Their vacation has been perfect so far, as much as Garak is willing to admit anyway. Julian has been the perfect host – explaining every little detail, each grain of history in the architecture and people that swarm around them as if they both didn’t know that Garak would’ve researched this all himself, would’ve gathered every single piece of intel and memorised it perfectly.

Garak hadn’t exactly had his doubts about coming to Earth, even if it was far too Federation for his own tastes. He’d wanted to see Julian’s home planet and privately was more than a little curious about this Earth city called Paris. It seemed far too beautiful and elegant to be real, even if this was by human standards. But Garak had wondered about what Julian’s reaction would be – he knew, after all, the Earth held as many painful memories for Julian as it did good memories. He’d wondered when they’d boarded the little transport ship all those days ago if this was a mistake.

Now as Julian pushes ahead of him into the little bustling café – speaking in strings of perfect French to the waiter, those doubts come back to the front of his mind as his Universal Translator tries to keep up. Even though Julian is smiling again now as he speaks to their waiter, Garak can see that his shoulders are rigid beneath his shirt and his hands are balled into fists at his sides. Something is bothering him.

They are seated quickly – out on a balcony boarded by flowers, overlooking the very thing they had come to see. The Eiffel Tower rises out from the earth below, almost Cardassian in its construction, up towards the stars with such beauty that Garak can barely tear his attention away to look at the menu.

Julian orders for him anyway – two cups of tea and Café des Artistes speciality, two croissants with cream cheese and tomatoes. Garak can’t see what’s so special about it, they are in Paris after all, but decides that Julian wouldn’t appreciate his thoughts on the matter at that moment. Instead, he goes back to studying the view while they wait, Julian staying oddly quiet. Lost in thought, he decides, waiting for his moment to ask Julian about it.

Thankfully, their food arrives quickly, giving Garak something else to distract himself. He’s come to appreciate the textures and flavours of a few human foods, after practically living half in Julian’s quarters for the past few months. French cuisine especially. The croissant is light, melting on his tongue along with the cheese and balanced with the sting of the tomato.

‘Are you having a good day Garak?’ Julian says suddenly, croissant crumbs littering the corners of his mouth. His voice is still low and quiet and unlike himself. Dangerous.

‘Yes, my dear,’ Garak replies gently, steeling himself for the directness he must use. In the few months of their relationship, Garak has been a quick study - finding that while Julian enjoys their little games, sometimes a little directness goes a long way. Even if it goes against every fibre of his being. ‘Is there something bothering you?’

Julian exhales in one long breath before bringing his teacup up to his mouth and taking another sip. Garak gives him his space – gaze drawn back to the streets below as he takes another measured bite of his croissant. He feels lazy in the not-quite-hot-enough midday warmth, like he could just sit here staring out across the city forever.

 ‘Memories,’ Julian says finally, voice low and guarded. Garak turns back towards him, forcing himself to relax his posture – to look as relaxed and non-threatening as he can to comfort Julian. ‘Of, well, a lot I suppose,’ Julian continues after a moment, refusing to meet his gaze, ‘Palis…’

Ah.

‘My dear if it’s too personal for you to be here,’ he says, reaching out with his hand beneath the table until his fingers meet Julian’s. He twines them together – Julian’s soft warmth against his own rough palm, in some measure of support.

Julian takes another deep breath as if gathering all of his courage, and finally meets Garak’s gaze. ‘It’s fine Garak. Really. I just didn’t,’ he pauses seeming to search for the right words. Garak squeezes his fingers lightly against the back Julian’s palm and Julian squeezes back. ‘It’s just that I didn’t expect to feel so much. To miss her so much, to see her here even when she’s not. But,’ he says, leaning closer as if he’s telling Garak a secret, ‘I’ve decided that it’s fine. You see, I miss Palis – she was a great woman. But she has another life now and I have you. This is our place, our vacation.’

His dear Doctor is full of yet more surprises, it seems.

‘Let’s go to the beach!’ Julian says suddenly, his eyes bright with fire and Garak can do nothing except return his smile. It’s so easy, these days.

[cinaed]

My Deep Space Nine Thoughts

So instead of doing anything productive with my life for the past two months I have been watching Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. I...mostly don't regret that decision since right now my ability to write anything is null and void, but also because DS9 was a very good show (though I do have several quibbles with the final season).

But anyway! My thoughts on DS9 aka SPOILERS GALORE:

When I attempted to watch the show back in.... *mumble* undergrad back in 2006ish *mumble* I bailed at around season 3, which meant my favorite characters were pretty much Garak and Bashir and that was about it. This go around I loved pretty much everyone, but Kira, Nog, Garak, and Rom were the ones I enjoyed watching develop the most. (I still love Garak, and still ship Garak/Bashir but wow do I want to shake Bashir a lot A LOT.)

All of my favorite episodes ended up being either Kira episodes, Quark/Ferengi episodes, Jadzia being awesome episodes, Garak/Cardassians episodes, or episodes where Sisko gets to shine without being bogged down with the Prophet stuff like the Gabriel Bell episodes and Far Beyond the Stars.

I enjoyed how many different friendships and relationships there were on the show! Personal favorites include Jake and Nog, Dax and Sisko, Jake and Sisko, Worf/Jadzia, Garak/Bashir, Quark/Odo, Sisko and Nog, Garak and Odo, Kasidy/Sisko, Quark and his family, Odo/Kira, Kira and her Cardassians, every single one of Quark's weird romances (why did that awesome Cardassian dissident lady come back? why did Pel never get to show up again? you failed me show!), and all of Sisko's weird nemeses shouting "HATE/LOVE ME, SISKO!"

That said, BENJAMIN LAFAYETTE SISKO! How dare you pull a Goku on your family? I don't care what the Prophets told you! This is not what Kasidy signed up for in the "for better or for worse" portion of marriage!

Also I realize I should be annoyed by LGBTQ characters only being allowed in the Mirrorverse and being mostly evil, and I am, but I also loved all the weird shenanigans of Kira and her harem, Ezri/Leeta, and Garak hitting on Worf, like...I can't help it, that was great. But also I feel like gender/sexuality should be unimportant for joined Trills after a while, and also with the Ferengi culture being so toxic towards women that there should be a lot of male partnerships.

Most of the villains were fascinating! I really loved Kai Winn and for the most part Gul Dukat, as well as the Dominion threat, and really wished that we'd focused on the Cardassian resistance in the final season instead of the Prophets/pah wraiths deal. Also...someone please help the Jem'hadar. They deserve better.  

My biggest complaint was the dim lighting, because half the time I couldn't figure out what was going on. Let us see the characters in the scene guys! I would like to see people's expressions during vital conversations!

Fanworks I want:

Fix-it for Ziyal. Just imagine her staying on the station and becoming an artist collaborating with Jake for his books and news articles! Imagine them being Joseph Sisko's pride and joy as they help the abandoned Cardassian orphans on Bajor, visit Cardassia Prime post-show to tell the galaxy about its rebuilding efforts, write about the female Founder's trial, go to Ferenginar to study the social revolution, or just roam around the galaxy.

Post-show look at the Jem'hadar and the Vorta in the aftermath of the Founders' defeat and the Federation trial of the female Founder. What do they become when they have no battle to fight? When they see their gods brought low and defeated? I actually feel like the Klingons and the Jem'hadar both have a lot in common and both need fundamental changes to survive and would be really interested in seeing their races change and adapt.

After a discussion with bookelfe, an AU fic where Bashir manages to save Jadzia but Ezri still ends up with the symbiont, because it would be messy and complicated and interesting, with Ezri still having to adjust to being joined when that wasn't in her plans at all, still having some of Jadzia's memories, while Jadzia now has no memories of her joined hosts and she and Worf have to work through their relationship as Jadzia learns to live with just herself in her head.  

I realize "Bashir goes to Cardassia and reunites with Garak" is a staple and the equivalent of post-seine JVJ fic but I want all the varieties! There are a bunch of ways I can see Julian ending up there and I'd like to see all the options play out.

Also Bajoran and Cardassian rebuilding stories, both of them recovering from the different occupations, with guest stars like Quark's ex and those awesome female scientists! What does Bajor do in the aftermath of the Dominion War? Do they finally join the Federation? How about Cardassia?

More about the social revolution on Ferenginar that happened off-screen (come on show, that would've been a more interesting episode than O'Brien and Bashir rummaging around that Section 31 guy's mind!) because I have decided that Pel gets to come back and become Rom's financial adviser. Also more Ferengi women getting to go out and do business and make profit.

Quark and Kira post-show, missing Odo together. Kira in general, because her as the person in charge of the station was a great character choice and I'd love to see more of her life post-finale.  And Nog’s further life in Starfleet!

More of Garak and Bashir’s book club! I want more about them discussing Cardassian and human literature, maybe even try some Bajoran literature. I also keep getting side-tracked imagining potential shifts in Bajoran lit during and post-occupation. Also laughing at the thought of Garak insulting whatever human novel Bashir got him to read and Worf walking by and going “The only human literature worth reading is Russian” and then being annoyed that he was even a little bit nice to Garak. 

I want Ezri to get a cute girlfriend. How about Jake’s ex-girlfriend, Mardah the Bajoran lady who was working the dabo tables before going to school to study entomology? 

Mirrorverse Ezri/Leeta also intrigues me. How did Leeta, a Bajoran, decide to break away from the Alliance and work for the Resistance instead?