#so basically seven parts in total

[stevieschrodinger]

Part One Seven

Eddie cradles his can of Coke, sipping slowly. He’s trying not to be aware that there is not a single drop of alcohol here; he’s failing miserably. He’s also trying not to blame himself, but it feels like everyone else here is being punished for his fuck up.

It’s sunny and warm, everyone else rocking tee shirts and shorts, enjoying the weather, while Eddie wraps his hoodie around himself even tighter, convincing himself that he’s chilled.

Eddie slithers lower down in the fancy garden lounger he’s got half tilted back; he’s watching two pups chase each other around in clumsy circles at the other end of the yard. He’s vaguely mortified that he doesn’t actually know which one of them is Gareth’s kid.

Eddie wants to curl up and disappear when Gareth comes and sits next to him, offering a plate. There’s a burger on it, and considering Jeff’s on the grill, it’s a damn good looking burger. Eddie’s stomach turns over at the sight of it. “Don’t worry, I didn’t bother getting you any of the green stuff.”

“Thanks,” Eddie says vaguely, haunted by Steve’s not there frown, “I would have, you know, maybe a couple of carrot sticks or something.”

“Oh I’ll-”

“No. No. I’ll go in a bit,” Gareth sits back down, an uncertain look on his face, which makes Eddie feel even more shit. Gareth isn’t his fucking servant, and the guys treating him like he’s made out of glass is getting really old really quick, “you guys can drink, you know, if you want to,” Eddie offers, as an apology.

“Nah, we don’t really anyway, because of the pups,” he seems genuine enough, “and...I mean it just felt kind of harsh, I guess.”

Eddie shrugs, “I’m going to have to get used to it at some point right?”

“Yeah, totally. But it doesn’t have to be today.”

They sit in silence for a while, just people watching. It’s only a small group; Gareth’s mate who keeps giving Eddie the side eye when she thinks he isn’t watching. Jeff and his girlfriend. Chrissy. Jeff’s sister and her mate, plus Gareth’s Mom is around somewhere, Eddie’s pretty sure.

A few people have said hello to him, made polite conversation. It’s all so stilted and awkward and Eddie is already wondering how soon he can ask Chrissy to take him home again.

It’s quietly kind of devastating; Eddie had been really looking forward to this.

Eddie bites the bullet, “which one is Arlo?”

Both pups are vaguely the same age, and Eddie can’t remember seeing Arlo properly since he was basically a new born. He looked like a pink potato, so impossible to work it out from that.

“Blue shirt,” Gareth answers, “also the fucking loud one,” Gareth chuckles.

Eddie joins in, chuckling even though it’s not funny, not really. He can hear both pups squealing with joy from here. Until one of them falls over, and then the squealing turns upset and Gareth’s getting up to retrieve his pup. He ambles over, the pup just took a tumble on the grass, so he isn’t hurt, and Gareth doesn’t move with any urgency, simply scooping his pup up.

A kiss on each knee and a loud raspberry blown on a tummy and the pup is off again, like nothing happened at all.

Eddie manages a mouthful of his burger. It’s as good as it looks, and the moment he’s chewing he realizes he’s actually hungry. After a couple of mouthfuls he actually feels a little better.

“You get anywhere with the lyrics?” Gareth asks as he sits back down.

Eddie had read through everything the guys had given him, some of it good, some of it great, but as usual all of it disjointed and in need of a lot of structuring. Not to mention the actual music.

None of it has spoken to him though. He used to just look at words and the tune would come to him. Just kind of...appear, from some unknown place. Eddie’s written complete songs in an afternoon before, feeling like he wasn’t really involved, merely the delivery system for something that was being dragged from somewhere deep inside himself. Something that simply floated onto the page, funneled through Eddie’s hands and into his messy pigeon scratch.

Eddie with nothing but his guitar and a pen, creating something that spoke to literally hundreds of thousands of people.

He hasn’t lost the music, he’s pretty sure...he just doesn’t know how to get it to come back. Like a wayward pet that Eddie’s abused and neglected one too many times.

Eddie is struck vaguely by the image of his inspiration, his talent, being something like a cat. Maybe it’s gone off and moved in with a neighbor who feeds it better stuff than Eddie ever did. Maybe it’s purring up a tuney storm somewhere, for some kind old lady who dispenses tuna and has no idea what she has.

He’s pretty sure Steve would have some advice on the matter. Steve isn’t here though. Eddie wonders vaguely if he’s ever even going to see Steve ever again.

“I’ve read through it all. Some really good stuff in there...maybe I could bring it to the studio and we could have a little play?”

“You haven't written anything, have you?”

“Not a thing.”

Gareth snorts a laugh, and it kind of feels a little better, a little more natural, “okay. But don’t put any pressure on yourself okay, I guess these things take time and...you’re still getting better, you know?”

“Right. Sure.”

“How was that?” Chrissy asks, not looking at him. He’s glad she’s not looking at him, considering she’s driving, but, still.

“Yeah. It...well it was fucking awkward.”

“Uh hu, saw you got talking to Gar though.”

“Yeah. Yeah that felt better. They’re...they’re being so good about all this and I don’t know what to do with that, you know? It’d be so much easier if they were just...fucking angry with me. All this understanding is...it’s not right.” He’s not even angry. He’s not anything really. He feels like his insides have been scraped out.

“It’s because they actually like you,” Chrissy tells him, “fuck knows why,” she mumbles after.

Eddie sinks down in his seat, arms crossed tight. He decides to spend the rest of the journey staring out of the window.

“What?” Eddie squints up at Chrissy.

“The nurse is here to do a blood draw, it’s been a week since your rut, they want to check on you.”

“Oh,” Eddie scrubs at his face, manages to drag himself upright and flop on the edge of the bed for a second, gathering himself.

He doesn’t put it together until he’s slumped his way into the kitchen. It’s Robin. Steve’s best friend.

She already has her stuff laid out on the counter, a cushion from the couch ready to support Eddie’s arm. Chrissy faffs with the coffee machine, “how do you take it?”

Robin responds with what Eddie is sure is an illegal amount of sugar and creamer. He just shrugs to himself, taking his seat, Chrissy sliding him a coffee too.

“Okay, you know the drill right?” Robin asks as she tightens the elastic thingy around the top of Eddie’s arm.

Eddie holds his arm out, braced on the pillow, making a fist and giving a couple of squeezes. Robin mumbles something about a small scratch, and everyone waits quietly while Robin fills four little blood thingies up before deftly removing the needle and replacing it with a plaster. She ditches her gloves, downs her coffee, and then washes her hands and her mug at the sink.

She packs her things away, Chrissy’s phone rings and she heads out the French doors onto the deck to answer it.

Eddie takes the chance, “I’ll see you out.”

Robin finishes packing all her bits and bobs away in her cool box looking thing, “sure, thanks.”

Eddie calls himself plenty of names on the way to the door, Robin trailing behind. Thinks about how Steve is nothing to do with him. He’s stupid for asking. What’s the point of asking, even, it doesn’t change anything. It’s polite, no, it’s fine, he could ask? No, it’s weird and pointless-

Eddie’s so deep in his own thoughts Robin’s out the door and he nearly misses his chance, he’s landed on being pretty sure he definitely shouldn’t ask, but it slips out without his permission, “how’s Steve?”

She shrugs smiling, “yeah pretty good thanks, I’ll tell him you were asking after him,” and then she’s gone, getting in her little car and heading off down the drive. Eddie doesn’t know what he even expected. He doesn’t understand why he even cares. Steve’s a dick.

Eddie was just being polite, or whatever.

Part Nine

[moomine]

backwash II | daisuke

author's note: totally awesome people should check out part one as well ⍢ also, if you want to be part of a taglist for future updates feel free to reply or dm me! (cover image credit)

summary: (daisuke x f!reader) It's been a little over a month since the Tulpar departed on its 382-day long haul. Anya takes the reader aside to perform her monthly psych eval, where she discusses her experiences with her peers and life on the ship so far. After she's clear to go, she runs into Daisuke who's drawing in the lounge.

word count: 2,291

warnings: mild language? all characters are 18+

now playing: Radiohead - "Motion Picture Soundtrack"

⋆⁺₊⋆ ☀︎ ⋆⁺₊⋆

EMPLOYEE STATEMENT 028—

I’m starting to feel more and more homesick. I miss my mom’s roast chicken. I miss swimming pools and the feeling of the breeze. I miss burning incense. I miss my friends. It hasn’t been that long since we left Earth, but I guess I just never considered how still outer space would be. How lonely I’d feel. The others have been nice, yeah. Especially Anya. And Daisuke. I get the feeling that Captain Curly is still warming up to me. I wonder if he’s ever taken on another apprentice before. I don’t know about Swansea, or Jimmy. They seem to tolerate me at best. But then again, those two kind of just tolerate everyone, except for maybe Captain Curly. It’s only been almost a month. I just have to keep my head. 

If mom were here she’d say: “Everything gets easier with time. Time and patience.”

DAY TWENTY-SEVEN—

“Everything okay, [Name]?” Anya asked in a gentle tone, gingerly placing a hand on the table in front of you.

Your shoulders tensed at the sound of her voice as it filled the otherwise silent lounge. You looked up at her, feeling the tension seemingly wash away by the sight of her face. She offered you an understanding smile, her tired features softened as she looked down at you.

“Yeah. I’m sorry. Just lost in thought, I guess,” you responded. 

You raised a hand to rub your eyes. It had been difficult to find sleep lately. The groaning of the ship was almost haunting at night. Laying in your bed, staring at the ceiling, you spent the few hours allotted for sleep thinking about Earth, about what laid just beyond the door to your room, about the ceaseless whining of steel and steam. About the next three hundred and fifty four days.

Anya nodded sympathetically, moving her hand from the table top to your shoulder blade. “It gets easier. I promise,” she paused as Jimmy and Curly entered the room, their voices loud and booming. “Are you ready for your psych eval?”

You nearly didn’t hear her over the sound of the other two. They were reminiscing, shouting stories back and forth of college parties, bar fights, and past lovers.

“As I’ll ever be,” you said with a timid grin. 

Anya nodded once more, motioning toward the door just past the kitchen space. You came to your feet and followed her until the two of you made it to her domain. The medical bay had become a safe haven for you. Over the past month, you gravitated toward Anya the most. She had been kind to you from the very beginning, almost sisterly. When there was no more work to be done, you often found yourself walking straight through the lounge and into her office. Anya didn’t mind. In fact, she had grown to rather enjoy the company.

She walked around the desk before taking a seat in her chair. Behind her was a wall of white shelves and cabinets with glass doors. Inside they held assorted medical supplies and books on psychology and basic clinical practice. To the right of her was a bulletin board, cluttered with posters, a calendar, pictures of her hometown, and notes and reminders. A number of Daisuke’s doodles had made it up as well, namely ‘Yimpy’, a rather horrible caricature of Jimmy. It was pretty realistic.

You sat across from her with your hands interlocked in a tight ball. “Same as last time, right?”

Anya grinned as she organized your file. “Yep, same as last time. Since it’s only your second evaluation, I’m going to go over it one more time. Is that okay with you?”

You nodded.

“Lovely,” she said with a soft hum. Tapping the papers into a neat pile against the desk, Anya glanced at you once more. Her eyes flickered from the page to you, you to the page as she read aloud. “I’m going to ask you a series of questions about your experience, relationships, and general well being during your time under contract with Pony Express. It is your responsibility to answer as truthfully as you feel comfortable and/or deem necessary. Your answers remain confidential unless you give reason to believe you are at risk of harming yourself or others. Do you have any questions?”

“No questions here,” you replied with a shake of your head.

“Perfect. Let’s get started. On a scale of one to ten, how confident do you feel in your capability to complete your work and responsibilities on a day to day basis?” Anya read.

“Maybe eight? I’m still getting a hold of some of the more technical aspects. The Tulpar is an older ship… I wasn’t exactly trained on her special quirks in school,” you said with a nervous laugh.

“You’ll catch on fast. You already have,” she reassured, jotting down your response with that sweet smile still on her face. “Okay, next question. You mentioned last time that you’ve been having difficulty sleeping, is that still a relevant cause for concern?”

“I don’t know if it’s that concerning. I think I’m just having a hard time getting used to the new environment. It’s been getting easier to fall asleep though,” you responded. A little, white lie.

“I’m happy to hear that, [Name]. Your rest is important. I remember not being able to sleep at all during my first haul. I spent all night just tossing and turning, reading my books if I could focus on them long enough. It’s normal, but from the sound of it, you’re doing a great job adjusting.” Her gaze softened as she spoke. It was clear that she had grown to care for you quite quickly, and you did the same for her. “Only a couple more left to go…”

Anya listened intently while you answered each of her questions, taking the time to write down key details of your responses. Between questions, the sound of her pen etching against the paper filled the room. As Anya wrapped up the second to last question, your eyes wandered to the evening window screen. The warm orange and reds of the artificial sunset made the room look like it was on fire. You looked back to your hands, reaching up to take a piece of your hair and twist it between two fingers.

“All right,” Anya spoke up. “Last but not least, how do you feel about your relationships with the rest of the crew? Is there anything I should know about in particular?”

“No, I don’t think so. Everyone has treated me fine enough. Other than you, I’m still trying to get to know everyone better,” you said, still focused on your hair.

Another sympathetic smile graced Anya’s lips as she looked over at you. She knew how it felt to feel slightly out of place. “Look, I’m technically not supposed to tell you this, so you have to keep it a secret. Okay?” Anya let out a quiet laugh as you nodded quickly. She watched amused as you dropped your strand of hair and leaned in closer. “Daisuke mentioned during his eval that he wanted to get to know you more. Maybe you could try talking to him? You two have more in common than you might think.”

You looked down at your lap again, biting at the inside of your cheek. “Yeah, okay. Maybe I will.”

“Well, you’re all set. You’re free to go.” Anya closed the file and tucked it away alongside the others in her desk. “Thank you for your time, [Name]. I assume I’ll see you here tomorrow. Same time as usual?”

“Same time as usual,” you echoed, beaming as you got out of your chair and left the room.

From the hallway leading to the medical bay, you could tell that the lounge was quiet now. Curly and Jimmy must have wandered off elsewhere. It would have been completely silent if it weren’t for the subtle sound of pencil scratching coming from deeper within. As you entered the room you noticed Daisuke, hunched over the table as he sketched something in his sketchbook. Completely oblivious. You leaned against the doorway and watched from a distance for a moment, admiring as he tucked a tuft of fried brown hair behind his ear. 

“What are you drawing?” you questioned.

Daisuke jumped in his seat like a cat that had been snuck up on. His eyes shot to you, the surprise he felt immediately quelling into a tenuous excitement. He hastily closed his sketchbook —almost like he was hiding something— and smoothed out his hair. His mouth broke out into a wide, infectious smile, the gap in his two front teeth a thin ravine and the dimples on either side of his mouth tiny sinkholes.

“Me? Oh, y’know, just doodling,” he said, leaning back in his chair as if trying to act casual. “Where ya been? I couldn’t find- I mean, I didn’t see you back in the cockpit.”

“Psych eval.” You pointed over your shoulder with your thumb as you pushed yourself from the doorframe. “Can I see it?” you asked, walking up to the table and taking the seat across from him.

“Uhh… see what?” Daisuke asked in turn, voice coy and simultaneously flustered.

“Your doodles,” you responded with a laugh. “Only if you’re okay with that, obviously.”

“Oh! I mean, yeah. That’s like, totally fine. But, fair warning, they’re not that incredible or anything.” Reluctantly, Daisuke passed you his sketchbook. He looked rather bashful, cheeks slightly flushed and smile wavering.

“Hey, that’s not fair. I’ve seen your stuff on Anya’s corkboard. You’re really good.” You took the sketchbook in your hands, looking down at the cover of it. It was absolutely littered in a random assortment of stickers. Only through the few and far between gaps could you see that it was once a pure black. It looked much cooler now decorated with the various games, bands, and whatever else Daisuke liked. “Are you sure you don’t mind me looking? Again, it’s perfectly fine if you changed your mind.”

“Nah, it’s all good. Just don’t expect too much, ‘kay?” he replied, running a hand through his hair.

“No expectations,” you agreed.

You turned over the cover, revealing the first page. In red ink you read ‘if found please return to Daisuke, thank youuuuuu’, alongside it was a doodle of himself looking particularly grateful. Or maybe he was pleading. You chuckled under your breath and began flipping through the rest of the pages. Each one was filled with sketches and those increasingly familiar doodles of predominantly other people. Friends, maybe family, and characters from the different games he liked. His work wasn’t quite realistic, but not the most stylized either. Rather, it seemed to be a perfect mix of the two. Something entirely unique to him. To Daisuke.

The deeper you got into the book you started to spy familiar faces. Captain Curly, Swansea, Anya, even Jimmy, but mostly you. You glanced up at him, seeing that he was seemingly avoiding eye contact with you all together. His hand was still tangled within his hair, head turned to the side, and lips knitted into a fine line. That mole —high on his left cheek— stared at you more than his own eyes.

When you finally got to the last page you realized he hadn’t been doodling at all. Instead, there before you, in soft pencil sketching, was a portrait of you that Daisuke had drawn from memory. It wasn’t perfect, but it was incredibly detailed nevertheless. You held up the book, taking in the details with a look of awe on your face. He captured all of your little imperfections —the tilt of your eyes, the quirk in your smile, all of it. 

“Daisuke, these are actually so good!” you exclaimed, setting the book down and passing it back to him.

“You… you really think so?” He let out a breath of relief, finally looking at you again. “Man, I thought you would find them totally weird. I’ve been too scared to show anyone else but Anya.”

“Why would I think they’re weird?” you asked.

“Shit, I dunno…” Daisuke trailed off.

You shook your head. “You’re really talented.”

“I- Thank you,” he breathed. Daisuke’s face softened as you looked at him from across the table. The flush in his cheeks was barely noticeable, a fair pink dusting the peaks of his features. “Hey, I noticed you brought a Walkman on board with you. I never thought I’d actually see one of those things in the flesh.”

“Oh, yeah,” you laughed lightly. “It was a gift from my mom. It’s outdated as hell, but I’ve got a bunch of custom tapes back in my room. We should totally listen to them sometime.”

“Are you kidding? Dude, I’d love to-”

“Daisuke!” Swansea called from down the hall, cutting him off. He rounded the corner, sticking his head into the lounge with a sweaty brow. “There you are. Get your ass up, break time’s over. We’ve got work to finish up before dinner.”

Daisuke looked noticeably disappointed at the sight of Swansea. “But I-”

“No ‘buts’. C’mon now, I don’t have all day,” Swansea said with a huff before he turned around, walking back toward the utility room.

“Coming,” Daisuke sighed. He stood up, tucking his sketchbook under his arm with a slight frown. “Guess I’ll see ya later, [Name].”

“Yeah! I’ve got to show you some of my mixes, remember?” you responded sweetly, smiling up at him.

Daisuke nodded enthusiastically. As he left the room, he adopted a pep in his step. A smile was glued to his face as he beamed down the hall. The human embodiment of sunshine in that moment.

[kamiversee]

𓆩 Crown of Sin 𓆪

Segment I Chapter: Four

❀ ~ Synopsis > In which you’re a princess who's given a total of six months to converge & inaugurate a solid plan secure enough to rid you of your fated marriage arrangements to Naoya Zenin. 

❀ ~ Content > language, dry humping, thigh riding, dirty talk, pet names, sexual tension, flirting, (slight) fluff, etc.

❀ ~ Word Count > 5.6k

❀ ~ Pairings > jjk men & women x f!reader.

{ chapters m!list }

——Spending seven days in a carriage is not for the weak. It’s a bumpy journey to the northern nation and takes quite a toll on all those traveling. It brings about stress and even a faint sense of dread after a while. At some point, you’d find yourself staring out the carriage window for what seemed like hours, merely watching as you passed by similar-looking trees over and over and over again.

Nightfall didn’t fare much better for you either. Or at least, it didn’t for the first few days. You’d gone on long trips like this before in your lifetime but this still felt different in some ways. So, on about the fifth night of your travels, you wanted to relieve yourself of the stress the road had brought you.

It was late and the carriages were still on a steady roll toward your destination, having taken a decent break earlier in the day. Nothing much had changed since your original departure. You still rode with Higuruma, occupying the same carriage as you whilst Yuki and the driver remained outside. Or at least, that’s what you did on most nights—not this one though.

No, instead, Higuruma ended up sharing a carriage with Utahime for the night per your request since you wanted Yuki to ride inside with you. Only two days of travel remained before you would set your eyes on that world-renowned blue-eyed prince again. But before you could even make it near the damn castle, you just had to rub one out.

Every day of travel was far too stuffy and cramped inside the carriage, despite it being rather roomy—it was more of a metaphorical kinda stuffy. Every day you found yourself near boredom just from watching the moving and ever-changing terrain outside the window, a boredom which only worsened at night given the dim lighting.

Combining that with the one or two wheel mishaps your crew ran into during the journey, you were definitely feeling anxious. Typically, when such anxieties settle upon you, you make sure to find time for yourself but when you’re traveling, it’s rather difficult to do so. Hell, everyone basically told you no straight up when you asked to ride alone for a while.

Which is more or less how you ended up with Yuki inside the carriage now. Someone just had to have their eyes on you so… have her eyes on you she did. But it wasn’t only her eyes that were on you currently. Those gorgeous hands of hers were latched to your hips as you moderately began indulging in your ‘harem duties’.

Yuki’s entire expression was focused upon you, a mix of anxiousness and lust dripping from her eyes alone. “This is… torture, princess.” Her voice left her throat in a mere whisper given your predicament. 

With a hand on her shoulder, your lips parted by her ear, thighs spread out over one of her own, and panty-clad cunt grinding in a delicious friction over her tensed leg—perhaps you truly were torturing the poor woman. “Just a few more minutes, please?” You uttered against her skin, voice sweet enough to make yet another chill sliver down her spine, “I’m… close.”

The hands hoisted onto your hips tightened in grip and Yuki found her teeth gritting slightly, “You could’ve finished by now if you’d let me—”

A jerk of your heat against her thigh causes her sentence to fall short. “We can’t,” You practically whine to the woman.

Yuki rolls her eyes and she can feel the tips of her fingers just itching to move against you. She knows she could make you feel so good if you’d just let her. “Who would know?” She asks you, angling her head toward you so that her gaze can fall on yours.

As you two meet one another in a mutual low-lidded stare, a small frown tugs at your lower lip and you sigh. “I would. The first night is—”

“Important, yes yes I know,” She cuts off in a huffed exhale, “We can’t have sex because that may make other (future) members of your harem feel bad or whatever.”

Your hips slow to a stop and you find your lashes bat at the woman before you. “It’s more than that. The person that I spend the first night with is important. Choosing this person is something I’ll do once I return home with the full harem.”

Yuki’s face tenses slightly, her brow twitching upward in faint irritation, “You already chose me first to join your harem, so what’s the difference?”

“I chose you first out of convenience more than anything.” You tell her. She flashes you a pointed look and you’re quick to make up for what you’d just said. “N-Not to say I wouldn’t have asked you to join if you lived far from me but… well, you are always quite close to me. It was only natural that I chose you first.”

She nods off, her head turning elsewhere, “So, does my being your first member mean almost nothing?”

You shrug a little and debate telling her a white lie but the truth leaves you before anything else, “Essentially, yes.” 

“I see—”

“Though,” You cut off as you lean toward her line of vision again, “It doesn’t make you any less special to me. Whether you were my first or last, I would desire you all the same.”

At that, you can feel the way the muscles in her thigh tense up and it makes your breath hitch. Pressing right up against your slick folds, you’re suddenly aware of the situation you’re in with the woman all over again. 

Her hands shift up to hold your waist and her hips roll slightly as she adjusts herself against the carriage seating, leaning her torso towards you and tilting her head as if she were about to kiss you. “If what you say is true then let me reciprocate this desire of yours,” Yuki whispers.

Everything about this woman makes it so very difficult for you to restrain yourself. Your eyes can’t help but fall down onto those pretty pinkened lips of hers. One push forward is all it would take for you to melt into her entirely and yet, you lean yourself back.

Whispering, “Yuki,” As she tightens her grip on your waist and tugs you toward her once more.

“One kiss won’t kill you.” She practically grits out as she eyes down each pant and every gasp that’s elicited from your throat.

It takes you a moment of self-deprecation not to give in to her right then and there. The tension that lies between what little space remains between her body and your own is thick and heavy with lust. Yuki looks like a second longer without having her head in between your legs and your taste dripping off her chin will be the death of her. You don’t think your body has ever felt so hot beneath someone else’s gaze before.

You can feel every ounce of pure want that exudes from her, the desperation lying in her fingertips to get them soaked with you, and the restrain on her body she holds not to flip you over against these damn seats and—

“It isn’t fair to the others.” You eventually whisper out, your voice carrying an unnoticeable waver to it.

“How so?” Yuki asks immediately without giving you time to even answer. Instead, her tongue swipes over her lips and she sighs, “Does that mean the harem member you kiss first will be of greater importance than the rest?”

Your thighs involuntarily squeeze around her, “No.”

“Then what is it?” She presses, flicking her sights up to your greedy gaze. 

You take a deep breath. “I am not good at… holding myself back. If I let you kiss me,” You pause again and your eyes dance back and forth between her left and right. Even amid the dark of the night, you’ll never figure out what it is about those deep pools of chocolate brown that cause your head to spin in the way it does, “I will only long for more.”

“So long for more,” She sears. Yuki narrows her eyes at you and her lips brush up against your own, “Long for all of me in the same way the rest of your body is right now.”

A whine exits the back of your throat, “We cannot.”

Yuki groans. “You say that but I know how badly you want to,” She then pushes up on her toes a bit, causing her leg to grind up against your cunt, “...I can feel you throbbing every time I open my mouth.”

All in one breath, “Then stop talking.” You practically choke out as your fingertips dig into her shoulders.

Yuki merely pouts to mock you, “Oh, but she does the same thing when I look at you too.” Teasingly, her head then weighs down a bit and she kisses the tip of your chin, gaze still locked onto you.

This time you groan a little and your head falls back, “Avert your eyes.”

She seizes the opportunity right then to latch her lips onto the center of your throat, kissing you in a hungered manner whilst her teeth graze over your sensitive skin. “Or touch you..” She continues, talking right against you.

The kiss alone not only sends a spiral of chills down your spine but it also earns a grind of your hips and an unintentional moan of her name, “Yuki..”

“Fuck,” She smiles against your neck, trailing down with her hot kisses, “Don’t say my name like that.”

A hand of yours leaves her shoulder and sinks up into her hair as you too crack a smile, “I can’t help it.”

You hear this throaty noise leave her lips just as she meets your collarbones and her hands begin to snake around your waist, gliding down, “I know, I know—slips off your tongue so easily, doesn’t it?”

She shouldn’t be touching you in the way that she is but all thoughts of protesting against it nearly fly out the window as she grabs a greedy handful of your ass. To which your body arches against her touch and your steady dry humping picks up in pace. 

Lost in it, and just barely finding it in you to respond to that question of hers, you end up murmuring to the woman so faintly that it almost misses her ears, “M-Mhm..”

Her breathy chuckle can be felt slipping down along the exposure of your skin, tickling you in indescribable ways. Trying to hide the sudden cockiness that just gave her, she snickers, “Aw, what’s this? We’re mumbling now?”

You try to snap back into yourself but when her hands return to your hips and she begins to guide them against her thigh, all hope is lost. “No, I-I just…”

Yuki lifts her head and watches as your eyes flicker due to the addictive friction her guidance is stimulating you with, “Just what?”

Your words fall so heavily from your mouth, as if unintentional. “I didn’t know you could say such crude things.”

“Princess,” She purrs, clearly mocking your title now in contrast to her usual tone of respect. “If you thought that was crude then you should allow me to have a long ‘n deep conversation with this sweet thing down here,” Every breath she takes is softer than the last but it slaps against your already fiery skin and only has your mind dizzying more and more by the second. 

To emphasize that little comment of hers, Yuki angles her hand elsewhere, resulting in a firm press of her thumb against your clothed clit. Your entire body reacts all at once and your head drops forward as a restrained moan exits your lips, just barely, “Hah… Yuki, please.”

She grins and her thumb rolls over your sensitive bud, causing your legs to clench around her again, “Oh? You like this, huh?” Her voice hits your ear this time and it feels as though that entire side of your face, along with the rest of your body, was burning up in a flustered array of heat.

You don’t dare to part your lips and even attempt to speak as her gentle touch continues. So, instead, you give her a hum and a lazy nod, “Mhmm..”

“Mumbling again? C’mon, don’t get all shy on me,” Yuki scoffs. She then takes her other hand and redirects it to your face, forcing your head up so that she can see your expression again. It’s almost in slow motion the way she presses the pad of her thumb against your bottom lip, staring right into your mouth and then whispering, “Here, open f’me.” 

You’re inclined to follow her every command, almost as if the roles between the two of you had changed. Your eyes have the sheerest gloss of pleasure husking over them and you appear way more desperate than you realize. Just as you obediently comply with her request and find your mouth opened into a small ‘o’ shape, Yuki flashes you a proud smile.

“Thereee we go,” She praises lightly, “Now don’t hold back. If you’re gonna moan then moan, I wanna hear you.”

Just then, your hips can’t help but rut further against her leg, your knee steadily drawing closer and closer to her crotch. It makes you wonder if she’s just as aroused by this as you are right now, especially considering you’re busy leaving quite the slick mess on her thigh. 

Batting your lashes as the sound she’s listening so intently for nearly escapes your throat, you whisper, “I can’t be loud, what if Shiu hears?”

The corner of her lips twitched smugly, “I’m sure he wouldn’t complain.”

“But—”

“Don’t think about him right now though, only me.” She cuts off, swiping that thumb still latched to your clit downwards a bit as you roll your hips forward. You again suppress the sound that tries to leave you, despite your mouth being open, and she frowns. “When I tell you to moan, I’m telling you to do so for me. If you’re gonna get off on my thigh like this then it’s the least you can do, no?”

Whining instead, you just pout. “Y-You’re cruel.”

Yuki’s eyes dilate at the sound of that, knowing she could be so much ‘crueler’ to you right now if she really wanted to. “Aww, now you’re just sayin’ things.” She teases.

“Shut up,” You fire back with quickness.

To your surprise, she actually does. You’re not sure if that helps you right now though, given the situation you’re in… Her silence only works to her benefit because the fewer words she spouts, the more attention she can give to that twitching clit of yours that her thumb soon only stimulates more and more and more.

One finger and you’re a sopping mess against her within minutes. From all those bratty complaints of yours to burying your head into the crook of her neck as you moan her name against her skin, Yuki finds that it’s in her lack of speech that she can truly do what she’d wished to from the very beginning. 

When you earlier first proposed the idea of getting yourself off, she immediately offered herself to you—all of her, right then and there without stutter. Of course, you turned that down and told her something about first nights being important blah blah blah… yeah, none of that seems to matter much now when you’re humping her thigh and blindly sucking on her neck out of desperation to reciprocate the pleasure you’re feeling.

That first suck catches her entirely off guard and your ears don’t fail to catch the heightened gasp she lets out. To which you only grow greedier and greedier. You let Yuki continue using that thumb of hers as your body melts entirely into her own, pussy leaving a slicked mess against the fabric of her uniform, and before you even realize what you’re doing—there are hickies forming all along that surprisingly sensitive neck of hers.

The first moan she lets out is when you kiss the area where her neck and shoulder meet, the sensation another surprise to her. Then, another leaves her lips when your body presses up against hers and your knee meets her crotch fully and firmly. Her thumb stammers in its roll against you and the moan she chokes out is loud enough for you to lift your head and look at her face.

Now she’s flushed. Her cheeks are the reddest you’ve ever seen and yet, that dominating look in her eyes has yet to soften. The sound of pleasure she let out was embarrassing, sure, but that didn’t stop her from keeping the rest of her composure (for the most part, anyway).

You’d never wanted to kiss someone more in that moment. Your orgasm was approaching and Yuki was right there, less than a hair’s length away from her lips being mashed into yours. And then came the eye contact. Bold and unwavering, as if she were silently telling you to go ahead and let go—to which you do a mere few seconds later. 

Yuki smiles at you and coaxes you through your orgasm as cries of sweet sweet pleasure fly out your throat. You won’t let her kiss you and she knows it but she leans in and trails kisses from the corner of your mouth to the tip of your ear just to whisper, “That’s my girl,” You think your eyes cross a little with how much that drives you farther off the edge. “You look so pretty when you cum, did y’know that?”

A hand of yours meets somewhere near her chest as you clench onto her uniform, unable to form words at the moment.

She lets out a gentle giggle. “Too vulgar for you?”

Your head shakes. Truth be told, you’ve heard words of filth before, you’re no stranger to it. But hearing it from Yuki is… it’s so wildly different and new for you. Her voice is usually so stern and protective around you but this side of hers is a whole new world.

Not that any of that is meant to be a complaint or anything, you quite like this side of her. It truly excites you to think of the day you return home with her and the rest of your harem, hopefully, and you’ll be able to experience all of which that mouth of hers has to offer. 

So, with all that said and done, the two of you eventually work around the carriage to clean yourselves up. Yuki ends up having to ask Shiu to stop so she can visit another carriage for a change of clothes but, luckily for her and all else involved, no one questioned anything.

And thus, that fifth night of traveling ended both smoothly and satisfactorily—leaving you on cloud nine and you grew closer and closer to the Northern Kingdom.

· · ──────── ·𖥸· ──────── · ·

Less than a day later each view you took of the scenery outside your classy carriage window consisted only of snowy plains that stretched on for miles and miles beyond the oath the carriages rode through. The weather had changed so much within only a few days. The temperature had been steadily declining as you’d traveled but despite the few layers of extra clothing you had to put on every now and then, you were truly surprised to see snow.

By now it was your seventh day of being in a carriage and you were so ready to get out of it for longer than a few hours of rest. Your crew was escorted throughout the city and another thing that caught you off guard was the crowds of people you saw gathered outside their homes and shops, all pointing at the royal vehicle you occupied.

You made sure to flash a few smiles and waves from your curtain-parted window, cheers and excited chatter heard even from the warm interior you rode so highly by in. You also took a mental note of how different the towns you rode through in the Northern kingdom were in comparison to the towns you not-so-sneakily visit so often back at home. 

Mixes of gray and brown mesh in with the clumps of snow gathered on each side of the paved road ahead, something so small yet so different in comparison to where you live. You don’t get snow so it’s truly a natural phenomenon you can’t seem to tear your eyes away from. 

In the towns, the snow was a mushy mess seemingly discarded to the roadsides. While up in the mountains or even deep into the forests, the snow remained mostly untouched by the hands of man—laying so sparklingly perfect in between tall trees completely void of leaves. 

When you finally started to approach the massive palace of destination, your eyes nearly tripled in size. Maybe it was because you’d been on the road for so long, or perhaps it was how long it’d been since you’d laid your eyes on a castle that’s not your own but… The Gojo Palace was absolutely massive. It had to be twice the size of your own, constructed into just a glorious piece of architecture that your eyes can hardly figure out where to focus.

Oh, and just in case it wasn’t obvious by now, yes, this was your first time visiting the Gojo Estate. Even though you’ve done your research on just about every other nation out there and know the palace was built many many years ago, it damn there shines and glimmers beneath the distant glow of the sun that casts its warmth down on it.

You feel like a kid in a candy store as the carriage pulls along past the absurdly large gates, parted open just for your arrival. Oh, it was so beautiful. If the palace itself paired with the clean spreads of snow wasn’t enough for you, then surely it was the arrangement of blue roses laid out along the courtyard path that caused your heart to thump in an even purer excitement.

As the wheels below and the hooves of horses ahead finally came to a stop, you were shuffling out of your seat faster than ever to race to the door. Luckily to you, your carriageman was popping your door wide open for you just as you readied to do so yourself. A gust of frosty cold air came bristling into the warm confines of the vehicle and you shivered a bit before taking Shiu’s offered hand and stepping out.

Yuki had been riding inside with you ever since that… night. But, she exited shortly after you, given how ecstatic you were to breathe some fresh air for the first time in hours. By the time she steps out and gets a chance to look at you, you’re rushing toward the nearest bed of roses available to you and inspecting them up close.

Your knight shudders beneath the cold air but warmth finds her internally as she, along with just about everyone else, watches you joyously run your fingers over the vibrant blue petals laid below. The ends of your dress and the short cloak-like jacket you have on are furred in white softness that keeps your body protected from the blaring cold that surrounds you.

But then again, you were too distracted with roses in a shade you’d never seen them in to notice the wind gusting over your face. The petals of each flower were as smooth as velvet to the touch and slipped so elegantly over your gloved fingers. 

Consumed by your admiration, you hardly notice as a pair of feet approach you until shoes meet your line of vision and you chuckle. “I suppose this is rather unladylike of me, huh?” You utter to who you assume is Higuruma based on the footwear.

“Unladylike isn’t the word I would use for it, Your Highness.” The man responds. Then the feet shift against the floor and you begin to lift your head to meet eyes with this person because that voice didn’t sound quite like Higuruma at all.

With your head lifted slightly, the man beside you comes to a crouch, mirroring how close you are to the ground. “Surprising, perhaps,” He continues, not quite yet placing his eyes on yours but instead looking down to the same plant you’d most recently touched. “But unladylike? Nah.”

When your gaze is met with a head of frosty-white hair, a side profile gorgeous enough to lead any woman to swoon on the spot, a tailored darkened navy-colored suit that’s embroidered with mixes of golds and light pastel blues, and the overwhelmingly familiar presence of Satoru Gojo, you nearly fall over.

Your jaw falls open as you rush to speak but he cuts you off with a curt turn of his head, dazzling azure eyes settling onto your features and leaving you completely speechless. “If I’d known you traveled all this way just to get distracted by some pretty flowers, I would’ve had them removed,” Gojo says to you lightly.

Batting your lashes at him, words still failing to leave your lips, you find yourself in awe. He has the face of an angel, every feature sculpted to perfection. Each and every detail was so clear—eyes deeper than any ocean you’ve ever seen, decorated by lashes prettier than any flower, delicate too, and the rest of his face was just…

You exhale so heavily that perspiration forms in the air. Gojo doesn’t fail to look down at your steadily parted lips and he smiles before averting his eyes. “That was a joke, by the way.” He hums, the tips of his ears a faint shade of pink. “I’m actually quite pleased to see you adore these roses so.”

“They’re gorgeous,” You manage out, earning his sharp gaze on you. “The roses, I mean. They are a delicacy to the eye, I haven’t been this twitterpated by flowers in a while.”

The corners of his lips curve and before you know it, he’s smiling at you. Gojo then nods his head to you slightly and his arm jerks a bit. You look down and notice he’s plucked the rose that bloomed the most, its petals laid out in pristine fashion. He then breaks a bit of the stem off and tucks it back into the bed below and then lifts his hand to you.

Your head pulls away as he nears you, “Are you seriously…”

“If you’ll allow me to,” Gojo hushes before sinking what's left of the rose’s stem into your hair. “I know it’s cliche but please, this shade of blue looks absolutely stunning on you.”

When his hand leaves your hair, you grin. “Does it?”

The prince in front of your scoffs, cocking his head back a bit, “Have you ever known me to lie?”

“A lot can change in two years, Satoru.” As soon as his name leaves you, you notice his entire expression shift.

Gojo hums to acknowledge your spoken words and then he pushes himself to stand up straight. His hand shoots down seconds later to help you to your feet, to which you accept and allow yourself to be tugged upright. Still holding your hand, he tips his head to the side and narrows his eyes at you.

“Damn right,” He murmurs beneath his breath. You feel it before you notice it but his gaze rakes over all of you. From your cloaked head to the ends of your fur-brimmed gown, Gojo takes in every bit of you just as you had him. Once finished, he leans forward and lifts your hand to his face.

Your eyes light up in a mix of surprise and amusement—watching as he pinches the fabric of your glove between two fingers and slips it right off of you just to press his chilly lips onto your bare skin. 

What’s one peck becomes two or three dangerous kisses that trail to your wrist before he shoots his eyes up to you and smirks, “You’ve changed quite a bit since I last saw you.”

A lighthearted scoff escapes you. “Is it safe to assume you mean that kindly?”

He straightens himself up and pulls your hand along with himself, causing your body to lull in closer to him. “Why of course, my lady.” Gojo winks, “I only mean to say that you’ve…”

You weigh nearer, “I’ve…?”

Shaking himself out of his stupor, “Grown even more stunning than I uh, remember.” Gojo finishes off,

Your brows shoot up questionably and a sly smirk preys upon your face, “Oh. Were my looks not memorable before—“

“No, no,” Gojo interjects, his eyes widening, “Y’know that’s not what I meant.”

“Then what—“

“Sweetheart,” He sighs, “Can we just drop our formalities for a moment and will you please embrace me like you used to?”

You snort at how long it took him to ask you that. “You desire a hug?”

The prince nods, “I do.”

“Then initiate it—“ Before any more smugness can leave your mouth, he’s pulling you into his arms and his staggering frame is engulfing you. 

Toned arms wrap around your waist and his head pretty much buries itself into your neck as your arms wrap up around his and you both share a hug that has man onlookers gasping. Your relationship with Gojo has always treaded so very carefully along the borders of something scandalous and something completely harmless—something of which many, including yourselves, struggle to identify the truth beneath it all.

“I’ve quite missed this,” Gojo murmurs in between the most sensitive crevices of your neck, causing you to be a bit jumpy within his arms.

In an honest attempt to distract him from your sensitivity, you squeeze him a bit tighter, “‘Missed what? Hugging me or simply me?”

He inhales strongly and exhales through his mouth, “Both.” Gojo whispers in a dream-like sigh. “Has anyone ever told you that you smell like heaven on earth?” The man asks while prying his face away from your skin.

Both of you continue to hold one another as you get lost in casual conversation. “Something of the sort, yes. You,” Your hands slip from around his neck and down to his chest. Peering forward, you smile radiantly in the face of your old-time friend, “Prince Satoru, smell like the beach. Which is so peculiar considering…” You look around, “Where you live.”

Gojo picks up on the playfulness you display and instantly matches your energy, “You think we don’t have beaches?” He replies with a dramatic gasp.

As he does so, his hands leave your waist and return to your gloveless hand, motioning to glide the accessory back onto you.

Your eyes fall to his actions and something about this conversation is making your smile refuse to fade, “Do you?”

He’s quiet for a moment while working your glove back on and you can’t help but cling onto every lingering touch of his fingertips to your bare skin. Something so subtle and yet… It was like ever since that night with Yuki, you’ve been overly aware of every touch upon your skin. Or, hey, perhaps it was just him. 

You’ve always known Gojo to be quite touchy, after all. 

“...No.” He eventually mumbles out in response to your question prior.

Your smile widens in triumph, “I didn’t think so.”

“Whatever,” He keeps your hand cupped in his own and scoffs. Then, he lifts your fingers to his lips again and kisses your clothed knuckles, “But seriously, I did miss you.”

You eye down his kiss and unintentionally soften your gaze, “It wouldn’t have hurt to send a letter or two, y’know.”

Running his thumb across the curves of your knuckles, Gojo gives you a toothy smile along with another wink, “True but uh, that goes both ways, beautiful.”

Now, while your banter with Gojo carries on in ways concerning to few, your knight and royal advisor stood idly by—merely watching the scene unfold in front of them.

They find themselves standing at a distance, having backed away from you the moment they saw Gojo rushing out to be the first to greet you. Even his guards and knights stood at a distance, giving the two of you nothing but your own little bubble of security and privacy for as long as either of you willed it so. 

“Have they always been this close?” Yuki asks the man standing to her left.

Higuruma shrugs. “I am not sure. I know little about their relationship, believe it or not.”

Yuki scoffs, “Can’t you advise against all that uh…” Her eyes narrow in on the way Gojo’s yet to remove his hand from you—seemingly always having this need to touch you. “Contact.”

“It is not my place to do so, Lady Tsukumo.” Higuruma huffs casually, turning to her shortly after, “Though, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you sound rather jealo—”

“They’re walking away.” She cuts off.

Higuruma, along with a nearby and also idle Utahime, looks over to you and Gojo only to spot your arm looped and locked with one of his as he talks your ear off and walks with you toward the palace.

Utahime is the first to start pacing toward them, “Seems like someone forgot about us rather quickly…” She frowns to herself whilst carrying a few of your necessary items in her arms.

Yuki and Higuruma are frozen where they stand for reasons unknown but after you and Gojo are about halfway to the palace entry doors, their feet remember how to operate and they move to follow.

The sound of you laughing at something inaudible from Gojo can be heard and Higuruma’s shoulders slump, “This is going to be a loong day, Lady Tsukumo.”

“Tell me about it.” She scoffs.

m!list | last chapter | next chapter |

tags 1/2;

@angellliqua @celestial-lunar  @withcheese @itoshi-r @silvarys @everything-red @fishosezo @haesify @sassybananaweaselpsychic @orange-juice-is-ass

@notjustagirlinthisworld @sushiimara @larkson0 @di-in-al @sxnkuna @hanuh @cayla0000 @helloxkittylo @idkmanshrugg @chocolatecheer

@michelintopic @cinaminroll @french3xit @valleydoli @broimherebcsimboredok @sleepisforpuzzies @cuti3patooti8 @sukunadckrider @f0r7una @ventila98

@vixionix @levislug @mauve-gojo @chosomi @semi-lover @bee3l0v3r @noooo-onee @r4sh3li @yenayaps @chososbestgirl

@smutyturtle @simp-plague @pnkblueberry @stargirl-mayaa @kunareads @tojisdollx @gojoslefttoenail @forbiddenblog @glittercherry777 @samm1e13

[ms-demeanor]

So I have vision insurance again which means I was able to go to the optometrist and get glasses through insurance for the first time in 11 years (instead of paying out of pocket and getting glasses from zenni) and here are my notes:

It's *NOT GREAT* that Luxotica is mentioned by name on the insurance card printout

I know everything got more expensive in the last ten years, but frames also got a lot more expensive and for some reason there was a huge gap in prices - my insurance covered $130 for frames and the office had a bunch of frames for $70 and a bunch of frames for $150 but basically no frames between those two price points.

When you say "I can't afford to go over the allowance" on XYZ thing they are not even *considering* the cost of progressive bifocals. So I was like "no coating, cheap frames, no extras" and then they were like "okay so the progressive bifocal is going to be over a hundred dollars more" and I was like "how much is the bifocal with a line" and they were like "oh that's only $15 but we don't consider that appropriate for your age, we recommend this other kind of lens" and it doesn't matter what you consider age appropriate for me, I can't afford that so we're not doing that.

The seventy dollar frames are all kind of trash. Super thin, super bendy, and not in a good "flexible fit" way but more in a "if you fall asleep in these you will wake up with broken glasses" way.

They wrote down my reading prescription wrong? For the last ten years I've been slowly creeping up from +.25 to my current +2.50; they told me it had increased but the printout said +.75 so either my prescription has been wrong for a while or they missed the 2 at the front of that number and my glasses are going to show up with a low magnification. (I noticed after I'd left the office but before the glasses arrived).

Given all of that, with insurance: $25 for a pair of glasses, which included the office copay.

So then of course I went to zenni and ordered glasses anyway because I've been wearing the same frame design for seven years and want another pair that look exactly like that.

Progressive bifocals WERE the most expensive part of the order, and because my prescription is stronger they are getting progressively more expensive - initially the upgrade to bifocal cost something like $30 for a lower magnification, now they're $85 for the stronger prescription.

And that's it, that's the expensive part. Fifteen dollar frames, five dollar anti-reflective coating, total for bifocals was around a hundred dollars; I got a pair of single-vision sunglasses for under $20.

Part of the reason I decided to spend more at zenni than at my optometrist's office was because I was able to get good, sturdy frames that I know fit my face and will survive mosh pits and me falling asleep on them without cracking. In order to get the same thing at the optometrist's office I would have had to pay thirty dollars more for lenses as well as forty more for frames so I would have walked out of there paying more for a pair of glasses with frames that I wasn't super excited about (there was a pair that was *okay* but not great that were similar in construction to my current frames but more bulky and square) than I did for glasses that I know I like and a pair of sunglasses.

I did end up paying less out of pocket for the visit than I would have without the insurance, and $15 for a pair of back-up glasses isn't bad. But it was all-in-all a frustrating experience.

However: I've been wearing the same pair of glasses for three years and the anti-reflective coating is worn away in some places and they're so scratched that they're impossible to actually clean in some places and large bastard looked through them last week and was like "OH! No wonder you can't tell when you need to clean your windshield! You don't get to drive at night until those are replaced" so no matter what glasses I'm wearing next week they're going to be an improvement.

[ddaz3d-and-cc0nfused]

𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐍𝐓𝐘-𝐄𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓: Dry Humping w/ Spencer Reid

a/n: HEY HEY HEY!! so i am fully aware that spencer was a child during college, so this is an alternative universe where he's of the college age 💀 this is basically season one spencer cause i wanna eat him!!

masterlist | kinktober masterlist | AO3

You didn't like how the other girls in the circle were looking at him. Their lustful eyes eating up a very nervous Spencer, the man playing with his fingers anxiously.

It was obvious that he wasn't used to being in places like this; where everyone was drunk, high or both, couples and randoms making out and practically fucking in every dark corner of the room. You never thought that you'd see The Spencer Reid, your college campus' genius, sitting in a spin the bottle circle in a random frat house.

You had no idea who convinced the poor boy that doing this was a good idea, but you would be damned if any other one of these girls were to get their hands on him. You liked him first — not just liked him — you claimed him. Everyone in your group knew that you liked him, so the fact that they had the fucking gall to look at him that way knowing you were there pissed you off.

"Alright, everybody!" A random bro shouted from on top of one of the dining room tables. "We were going to play Spin The Bottle, but I figured it'd be better if we play Seven Minutes in Heaven, seeing as though we have a special guest here with us tonight."

You knew exactly who he was talking about, and as your eyes lifted to look at Spencer, his gaze was already settled on you, but once he saw you were looking at him, he looked away bashfully. His face flushed a pretty red and so did his ears, and you could practically see the blood threatening to spill from his cuticles as he picked at them.

Your eyes narrowed at the jock angrily, every part of your body yelling at you to tend to Spencer.

But you swallowed it down.

A large group of people gathered around, and then the first spin of the night began. People were gleefully coming and going from the closet, a few of the couples manipulating the bottle so that it landed on them.

"Oh, shit!" One of the frat bros called out loudly. You looked curiously to see all eyes locked on you and Spencer, the tip pointing at you and the end pointing at him.

You must admit, you were a bit… known… around school. You wouldn't say you were popular, now that was a bit childish, but you definitely had connections in a couple different places.

The poor man looked almost frantic, looking at you then looking back down, almost as if saying you didn't have to. Oh, but you did.

"Seven minutes, pretty boy. C'mon." You said as you got up. His eyes were as big as saucers, his mouth gaping akin to like a fish would. You straightened your tight dress, reaching out a well manicured hand.

"If you want this to be over sooner then get up." You whispered sternly. He scrambled to interlock your fingers, and you lead him to the closet that was already significantly hot from the amount of bodies that had been in there already.

"We don't have to do anything you don't want to." You reassured. "No, no… I-I want to, it's just…" He babbled, wringing his hands. "It's just what?" You pushed, stepping closer to him. He gulped, backing up slightly and knocking into the shelves behind him.

"I just don't know how." He didn't know how to make you feel good, how to pleasure you. He was embarrassed to admit to the girl that he liked, who was also totally out of his league, that he was a virgin.

"Why did you come here, then?" You questioned with a slight smirk. "Because… because you were here and I wanted to uh- maybe- I don't know-" You cupped his face, stroking his cheeks.

"Kiss me then, Spence."

"Wh- what?!" He stuttered.

"I said," You spoke, your lips brushing against his, "Kiss me." He gulped, looking down at your lips back up to your eyes, then back down to your lips again.

"Okay." He breathed.

He leaned forward, albeit hesitantly, and pressed your lips together. It started out slow, but with a lot of coaxing from you, he got comfortable. Your lips moved in tandem as the room heated up. You had no idea what had come over you when you placed both of his hands on your ass.

"Touch me." You breathed heavily. Your breasts pressed tauntingly into his chest, his cock hardening embarrassingly fast. "Are you sure?" You nodded. "Please."

He tested the waters with a light squeeze before shoving your hips together. His body stuttered as a loud whine fell from his mouth. You could feel his bulge against your plush body and Spencer wanted nothing more than for the ground to swallow him whole.

"Sorry, sorry." His apologies were frantic, but your nerves burned with need. "I'm fine with you grinding on me, baby." You reassured. "In fact, I like it." Normally, you wouldn't say you carried a dominating energy with you, but it was like you wanted to swallow the poor boy whole.

"Oh, God." He whimpered, but nonetheless joined your lips back together. You slipped your plush thigh through his legs, pressing it on his cock.

His hips jutted out, and you swallowed his cry. His grips on your ass turned deathly as he humped your leg like a bitch in heat.

"That feel good?" You cooed, tucking a strand of hair behind his ear.

He nodded fastly, his lips pressed together and his eyes closed. He was lost in the feeling of the friction, perspiration beading on his hairline. You practially eat the sight of his deep red face up.

"You're mine. Alright, pretty boy?" You asked ferociously. You wrentched his head back, sinking your teeth into the sensitive skin of his neck. He nodded. "Say it." He yelped when you nipped at his adams apple.

"I'm yours, fuck- all yours!"

Your stomach twisted with a pleasant warm feeling, which only increased rapidly which you felt his thrusts grow sloppy.

"You gonna cum, honey?" You asked through your marking. "Yes, yes, yes…" He babbled. "Good. Cum all over me." He let out one last loud moan before you felt the warmth of spend seep out and onto the hem of your dress.

There was a knock on the door.

"Okay, lovebirds. Time's up!"

You smirked at the fact that Spencer was shaking like a leaf in your hold.

"After this, we are so going to my dorm." You claimed. "Yes! Yeah, yeah… yes, please." He all but shouted.

ೃ⁀➷ my lovely taglist!: @alina02 @louderfortheback @minervadashwood @their-love @fandomsarelifee @theendofthe70s @nomajdetective @mgg-theprettiestboy @phoenixblack89 @murdadixon @hallecarey1 @bunnybabe-babydoll @alixwriter @dixonzzgirl @violettavirus

[prod-ddeonu]

UNDER THE COVER | s.jy

MDNI! MDNI! MDNI!

pairing: librarian!Jake x fem!reader

cw/tw: librarian!Jake, badboy!Jake, smut, fluff, mentions of assault and sa, drugs, sex in a public building, pet names, praise, face fucking, masturbation, kissing, mentions of murder (one line)

synopsis: Love was never your goal, preferring to keep your nose in a book while sitting in an isolated corner of your favorite library. But then you met Jake Sim: the quiet librarian who wore sweaters and button downs, the man who treated every book like a treasure, the man that you felt was perfect for you. You knew better than to judge a book by its cover, but who would have known your quiet library crush was the exact opposite of what you'd expected?

featuring: jay and sunghoon (iconic bffs!)

wc: ~6.9k

PART 2

Buy me a Ko-fi!

“Finals are kicking my ass, man,” Sunghoon stretched his arms above his head as he dramatically groaned.

Jay nodded, his notes every shade of the rainbow from his color coded highlighting method of studying. “You can say that again,” he capped the red highlighter and put it behind his ear.

“Finals are kicking my ass, man,” Sunghoon repeated, laughing when Jay threw the yellow highlighter at him.

The two turned to you, your head falling as your eyes began to shut. “Y/N!” Jay shouted. Sunghoon pressed his finger against his mouth and shushed him. “Piss off, Hoon. We're in a soundproofed study room,” Jay sneered.

Your head shot up, hands flying into the table to catch yourself. “The proper function is forty-four,” you mumbled as your eyes opened. “Oh, sorry. I had a dream I had already taken the final,” you rubbed your eye with your wrist.

Sunghoon put his hand over your forehead. “Y/N, if you don't sleep enough, your score’s gonna be a forty-four,” he said, his tone laced with worry.

You smiled, pinching the bridge of your nose. Sunghoon ran his hand over the ponytail you held your hair in, bringing the hair over his head. “Jay, you think I could work long hair?”

“I don't even think you can work basic algebraic equations,” he scoffed. Sunghoon frowned, sitting back upright.

He looked at his notes before groaning in agony. “I'm done for the night, guys. It's, like, seven at night and I'm tired,” he whined.

“Yeah, I think I'm gonna head home, too. You coming, Y/N?” Jay asked as the two stood, packing their notes and pencils.

You shook your head. “No, I'm gonna get a little bit of reading therapy in,” you smiled, thinking of your favorite character.

The two boys looked at each other with a raised brow. Sunghoon wiggled his at Jay, the other returning the action to create some sort of impromptu language. “Are you sure it's therapeutic reading?” Jay asked tenderly.

“Or is it ‘I wanna fuck that hot librarian’?” Sunghoon finished the point, sliding onto the table in front of you.

Your ears turned red, the mental image Sunghoon painted making you sweat. The two burst into laughter, clapping loudly and pointing at you. “She totally does! Y/N has a crush!” Jay shouted.

You slapped your hand over his mouth. “It's soundproof in here, not a solitary confinement cell! They can definitely hear your walrus laughter!”

Jay faked shock, slapping his hand against his chest and holding the table for support.

Ignoring him, Sunghoon leaned his elbows against the table next to you. “So, whatcha likin’ about this dude?”

You squeaked. “I- um-”

Jay returned to his position on the other side of you, his hand on your shoulder. “Is he loud, badass, smokes a lot of weed and parties all night, muscle tees and ripped jeans, maybe a print-”

“Alright, alright!” You shouted. “Remind me to put some soap in your mouth, Jay,” you wagged your finger in his face. He snapped his jaw at you, following your finger. “He's the exact opposite, actually. He's quiet, really kind, he’s not into the party scene, he doesn't wear anything too showy-”

“So he's just like you?” Sunghoon interrupted, pulling the edge of his sweater onto his shoulder.

You nodded, a cheesy grin coming over your lips. “And how do you know all this?” Jay raised his brow. “I doubt you've hung out with him.”

“I can just tell,” you sighed dreamily. You kicked your feet underneath you in excitement.

Sunghoon rolled his eyes. “Ah, yes. Because you read minds.”

Jay clicked his tongue at you, crossing his arms. “Y/N, did nobody ever tell you not to judge a book by its cover?” He asked. “What if you get your hopes up, and then you find out that he's some rager that breaks your heart?”

You shook your head. “I don't think so, he seems pretty genuine from the way he looks.”

Sunghoon rolled his eyes playfully again, “Delusion is one of your few flaws, Y/N. Your other one is reading for fun.”

You sat with your knees against your chest in a small corner of the library. The seating arrangement in that corner was a long, wooden bench that wrapped around the corner of the room. You liked to sit against the corner, your back to the wall and feet facing the shelves in front of you.

In the book you were reading, the main character had gone out with her boss in order to escape her manipulative boyfriend and catch him cheating. Her boss was icy, tall, and young. You'd barely managed to catch it, but it seemed that he was younger than her. The main character was a happy woman who let her naïvety get the best of her, which her boss had helped her get past.

You were in the scene where her boss confesses to her, but you weren't sure where the story was going. He told her he was falling in love with her, which she reciprocated, but he was holding her so close, and the word “heat” and “member” kept appearing in sentences.

You saw a shadow loom over you, shading your book from the light. A large hand rested on top of the book, tilting it back. “Are you enjoying the book so far?” A deep voice with a thick accent asked.

You nodded, not looking up. “It's really good, I'm just a little confused as to what's happening. I don't know who this member is and why they're so hot, but it doesn't make sense for her to be kissing them and not the main guy,” you rambled.

The person let out a deep chuckle. “Cute,” he said under his breath. “This is my favorite part, actually. If you don't know what all of that means, though, maybe you should skip that scene. It's not really important to the plot, anyways,” he continued.

The dim light above you bounced off of his rings, his long finger tapping on the spine of the book lightly in a fidgeting manner.

“I want to know what it means,” you sighed. “Can you explain it to me?”

When the person didn't respond, you looked upwards. Your breath caught in your throat as you squeaked.

The librarian you'd been harboring a secret crush on stood above you, his mouth slightly agape and his cheeks pink. His eyes grew wider with shock the longer you looked into them.

You turned back to the book, your eyes not really reading any words. “I can figure it out myself, sorry,” you whispered.

The man scratched the nape of his neck, a shy laugh leaving his lips. “No, it's okay, that scene is just…”

“Just what? Confusing?”

“Just not something you'd want a stranger to explain.”

“If you love the book, though, wouldn't you be good at explaining it?” You asked, curiosity bubbling up inside you.

He took the book from your hands, folding the corner of the page you were on and closing it. “Let me go check this out for you. I'll tell you at the counter, then you can read the rest at home, ‘kay?”

You nodded, willing to do anything he suggested. He walked you to his counter, scanning the book. “That scene you were reading is probably one of the most well-written sex scenes a reader could ask for,” he casually commented, smirking when you covered your mouth. “You can Google the words you don't know, but tell me if you still enjoyed the book when you return it!”

He placed the book in your bag, waving to you and leaning against the counter.

You sound around, mouth open to speak. “Name’s Jake, by the way,” he smiled handsomely at you, nodding his head up once. “I was gonna introduce myself to you properly, but you kinda jumped the gun on that one, miss sex book girl.”

You blushed, looking away in embarrassment. “You don't have to call me that,” you barely whispered.

“Yeah?” He poked his tongue at his lip with a teasing smile. “What can I call you, then?”

“Y/N,” you looked at the floor before spinning around and walking to the door.

Jake waved behind you, a smile still prevalent on his face. “Have a safe night, Y/N,” he called out behind you. “Hope you enjoy your book!”

Oh, you enjoyed that book alright. With Jake’s words looming in your head, and a trusty Google search (turned out, member did not mean another character), you finished the book with a foggy mind and a whole lot of nervous swallows.

Jay and Sunghoon sat across from you at your local cafe, your bag on the table and notes strewn about. “Hoon, I think you should change majors,” Jay sighed, his palm against his forehead.

Sunghoon chewed his straw nervously while the other reviewed his notes and practice exam. “Why? I thought I was good with my pre-med stuff,” he grabbed the paper from Jay’s hands.

“‘What do you call a row of stitches holding together the edges of an incision?’ was the question, Hoon.”

He looked it over. “I don't see what I did wrong.”

You peeked your head up from your notes, reading the question. “You wrote ‘satire,’” Jay deadpanned. Sunghoon cursed under his breath and erased the answer, writing suture in its place.

“Could've sworn I put suture for that,” Sunghoon mumbled. You pat his back reassuringly, a small frown on his face. “I think I'm just burning out, I've been studying all of this for so long. Jay, gimme your card, I'm gonna go buy us a round of espresso.”

Jay swatted Sunghoon’s reaching arm away. “Dude, no! Use your card, I'm not rich,” he scoffed.

“Oh my gosh, Jay, please,” you whined. “I'm so tired, I barely slept last night.”

Jay’s brow flew to the top of his forehead, the corner of his lip lifting. “Is it because of a certain librarian you stayed late to see?” He lightly punched your shoulder jokingly.

You held your shoulder and cried out in pain dramatically. “C’mon, Jay, you owe her now,” Sunghoon waved his fingers at Jay to make a grabbing motion. Jay sighed, rolling his eyes and giving the card to him. “First round’s on Jay!”

Sunghoon skittered off to the counter to order the drinks, leaving Jay to interrogate you further.

He scooted his chair closer to yours, his arms folded over his chest. “So,” he started, “what's the reason you were up all night?”

You squeaked nervously. He laughed, placing his hand over yours softly. “I was reading a book Jake said was good,” you almost whispered.

Jay shot backwards into his seat, letting out a loud gasp of shock and earning concerned stares from the rest of the customers. You shushed him, to no avail. He spun in his chair, calling out to his friend. “Hoon! Hoon!”

Sunghoon turned to face him with a scowl. “What?” He mouthed.

“She got the hot librarian’s name!” He shouted, not caring whose morning he disturbed.

Sunghoon ran out of line, sliding back into the chair across from you and resting his hand against his chin. “Soooo,” Sunghoon dragged out, “what's his naaaame?”

You shrunk into your seat. “It’s, um-”

“It's Jake!” Jay shouted, leaning over the table.

Sunghoon and Jay brought their hands together, ooh-ing in a high pitched tone as they wiggle their fingers. “Anything else happen? Did he hold the door open for you?” Sunghoon swooned at you.

You shyly laughed. “No, he just told me to read this book,” you blushed, pulling it out of your bag. “He told me what some of it meant, and it really helped!”

Jay flipped the book open to the folded corner, reading a paragraph quickly. He closed the book, furrowed his brows, reopened the book, re-read the paragraph, and turned to you, pointing at the pages as he let his mouth hang open. “He told you what this meant?”

You nodded, blushing. “I was a little embarrassed, but he was super nice about it,” you crossed your ankles and swayed slowly.

Jay shut the book and slid it into your bag, Sunghoon reaching in and pulling it out as he turned.

“Y/N, my dearest, sweetest, bestest friend,” he placed his hand on your shoulder with a smile. Suddenly, his grip turned hard, squeezing into your collarbone. “HE IS FLIRTING WITH YOU!” He seethed.

You swatted his hand away. “Then what do– ow, that actually hurts still– I do?”

Jay peacefully made a tent with his hands against the table. He blew his bangs out of his face, the brunette pieces flying upwards. “You go back there, and you ask him out,” Jay smirked evilly. “And then, you come back and relay everything to us.”

You nodded, saluting and grunting in comprehension.

Sunghoon gasped loudly, causing you and Jay to whip your heads to him.

He slammed the book against the table, scattering Jay’s highlighters and your pencils. “THIS IS A SEX BOOK?!” He shouted.

You blushed while Jay put his hand to his mouth in order to stifle his laughter. Sunghoon slowly turned to you, disgust apparent on his face. “You're such a nerd you read porn?”

“Hey, man. She reads it for the plot,” Jay snickered.

After your embarrassing exchange with your friends, you went back to the library to return the book (and stare at Jake). You held the book in front of you, sad to part with it. Jake had opened a door to a new world that you'd never heard of: the world of erotic romance books.

You blushed at the thought of the genre being his favorite. Swinging the door open, you took in the scent of paper, dust, and the slight hint of lavender you always caught when you walked in. Your eyes adjusted to the dim lighting.

Jake scanned a book at the counter for a woman, his long, black hair being accessorized by his usual pair of round, metal-rimmed glasses.

You watched silently from in front of the door as he performed such a melancholy task in such a charming way. The sleeves of his blue pullover came to the edges of his palm, his white turtleneck beneath covering his skin. You watched his pouty lips curve into your favorite smile, a slight wink being thrown to the older woman.

The woman slipped the book into her bag, giggling and walking towards the door. Jake’s eyes met your own, a happy wave being sent your way.

You felt yourself begin to melt at the sight.

You waved back, walking towards where he was standing. You placed the book into the counter as he smiled at you. He laughed lightly. “Guess it wasn't your cup of tea, seeing as you're bringing it back the next morning?”

You shook your head, “The opposite, actually. I finished it all last night, I just couldn't put it down!” You smiled.

Jake raised a brow, putting his elbow onto the countertop and resting his chin in his palm. “Yeah?” He asked with a thick accent. “What made it so enjoyable?”

This is the flirting Jay was talking about, you thought to yourself.

You bit the tip of your tongue, looking around the room in thought. What could you say to add to the flirting? You hadn't been in a serious relationship in years, you had little to no current experience.

“I guess I really liked the main character's chemistry with her boss,” you smiled at him, “and how he had a different side to his character that he only showed her.”

Jake nodded, leaning back and rocking onto the heels of his feet. He slid the book across the counter with a low whistle escaping his lips. “You're the first person I've met that tried to find something romantic in this book.”

You mentally facepalmed yourself. “Is that not what I was supposed to do? The writing was really good, I just-”

“Hey, hey,” he laughed. “Don't worry your pretty self over that, I think it's cool that you didn't just admire the smut aspect of the book,” he scanned the barcode on the back cover and placed the book onto a cart.

“I did enjoy that part a little, it just felt awkward to read,” you lied. You actually re-read that section of the book three times after finishing the book.

Jake’s tongue swiped across his bottom lip to wet it with a smile. He walked around the counter, pushing his book cart in the direction of the young adult section of the library.

You turned to walk to your usual corner of the library, ready to surrender this golden opportunity to your awkwardness. You took a step forward, spinning back around quickly as Jake coughed.

You made eye contact as his mouth opened to speak. “Can I have your number?” You blurted out.

Jake’s mouth shut with squinted eyes. Rejection.

“Can you read my mind or something?” He asked.

You shot him a confused look, a toothy grin splayed across his face. “I was-” He cleared his throat nervously, “I was just thinking about how I wanted to ask you to hang out after I close up, sorry if it came out weird.”

You felt clouds lift your feet, making them take even steps before landing in front of him with your phone out. He chuckled as he put his number into your phone. “Doesn't this place close late, though?” You asked.

He nodded. “It closes at nine, but if I'm being honest, fun never really happens until after dark.”

You laughed, thinking he was joking. He was not.

He shrugged, continuing to push the cart. “Just text me your address, I'll pick you up. I'll make sure it's a date that you'll never forget,” he smiled.

Your heart soared. It raced. It pounded. More importantly, it stopped. Time stopped. “Date?” You squeaked out.

He laughed, his ears turning red. “Yeah, I figured it should be a date. Don't wanna waste a good time with a pretty girl like you, y'know?” He scratched the back of his neck.

You nodded eagerly. “It's a date! What do I wear?”

“Just some comfortable clothes, you don't have to do much to impress me. I'll be wearing what I usually do, anyways,” he placed a book onto the shelf, examining the next book.

You walked to the cart, grabbing a book from the other side. “I know it's not very romantic, but can I help you put away the books? It might help you close faster,” you smiled.

He pulled the cuffs of his pull-over off of his hands. “I find it very romantic that you want to do the most boring part of my job with me, actually,” he joked.

That same lavender scent you would get hints of came flooding your senses as the two of you worked closely. You closed your eyes, taking a long breath. Jake smelled like lavender, and god, it made your knees weak.

Jay and Sunghoon, although strongly against the date, showed up to your place at seven sharp to help you get ready for it. “I mean, what kind of guy asks a kind and unsuspecting girl to go out after nine?” Sunghoon asked as he curled your hair.

He looked up into the mirror, eyes locking on yours. “A sex offender,” He released your hair from the contraption, waving the wand in the air as he spoke.

Jay groaned as he laid different outfit combinations across your bed. “For the tenth time, Sunghoon, he wouldn't be able to work at a public library if he was a registered sex offender!” Jay tapped his toes in thought before throwing a red shirt of yours onto the growing pile of clothes on your floor.

“Maybe he's not a sex offender yet,” Sunghoon replied, “but our little Y/N could end up being the body they find in the ditch.”

You sighed as Jay struggled to not throw a hard object at his friend. Sunghoon and Jay had been going at it since they arrived, Sunghoon erring more on the “worried mother” end of the argument.

“Sunghoon, stop worrying so much. He's super cute and sweet, he probably just wants to watch a movie or something,” you smiled.

Sunghoon clicked his tongue. “Let's recall what he said. ‘Wear something comfortable’, because tight clothes cause you to bleed out slower. ‘A date you'll never forget’, because you'll be dead by eleven.”

“‘I just want to have sex with you and then send you home at four in the morning,’” Jay commented. “You make it sound like she's going out with Michael Myers. Don't forget, Hoon, she already agreed to share her location with us in the groupchat.”

Sunghoon rolled his eyes, running his fingers through your curls. “So we'll know what corner of the road her body ends up on, but what about her head?”

“Oh, God, you're going off the deep end,” you pressed your hand to your forehead.

You stood from the chair, doing a small twirl for the two. You had already done your makeup before the two arrived, but you were a lost cause with fashion and hair.

Jay clapped, his lower lip jutting out in an impressed expression. “Wow, Hoon. Maybe you should drop out of college and become a hairdresser,” he commented, earning a threatening jab with the hot iron from Sunghoon.

You unplugged the appliance, taking it from his hands and carefully placing it down. Jay held a shirt and skirt to your body, nodding for the other man to look at the combination.

Sunghoon patted the man on his back, a smile on his face. “See, if I had to send my only daughter off to possibly go missing, this is the outfit I think she'd want to go in.”

You walked out of your door at exactly a quarter past nine, Jake’s text message reminding you of a drunk message from Jay.

Hey um he uh, um out sigh in the blocker period sore we eve this cumster you we're, um using speech to text period

You figured it translated roughly to, “Hey, I'm here, I'm outside in the black car. Sorry if this comes to you weird, I'm using text to speech.” You just couldn't figure out where cumster could've come from.

You giggled as you sat in the car. Your purse clinked loudly with the pepper spray, pocket knife, seatbelt cutter, lockpick, whistle, and body reflectors Sunghoon wouldn't let you leave without.

You closed the door, turning to Jake. You audibly screamed when you saw the man in the front seat. He jumped, looking into the backseat and out of every window. “Shit, Y/N, what's wrong?!” He shouted, equally as scared as you.

You looked at him in disbelief. “Jake? Is that really you?”

The man who was sitting next to you was wearing a black wife-beater and baggy jeans with large tears at the knees, a small book pendant hanging off a gold chain. His body, now uncovered by layers of clothing, was covered by layers of ink. He had a paw print on his inner arm, the name Layla written inside of it, along with many music tattoos and smaller symbols across his arms and chest.

You looked down, noting that it seemed even his legs had art on them. His eyes followed yours, a small gasp leaving his mouth. “Oh, yeah. Guess I forgot to mention all that,” he smiled. “They're everywhere, but they all mean something.”

You looked up at him, your eyes wide. You may have painted him as a modest man, but you'd be lying if you said the Jake in front of you didn't make you feel butterflies. “They're pretty,” you commented, reading the tattoo on the side of his neck.

“Love is a great beautifier.”

Jake self-consciously ran his hand over it. “It's from Little Women,” Jake smiled softly.

“I love that book,” you commented, continuing to admire his look. His hair had fallen messily over his forehead, his glasses seeming to have disappeared.

He sucked a breath in through his teeth. “Me too, actually. It's what got me into reading,” he looked forward as he put his seatbelt back on. “Look, if you find that I look too weird like this, I can put a jacket on or something-”

“No! I like it, actually. You look… good,” you blushed as you put your seatbelt on.

Jake reached his hand under your chin, lifting your head to look at him. “Look me in my eyes and say it again,” the corner of his lip lifted. “I want to see you say it, don't hide your face from me.”

You mumbled, “You look good.”

“I'll take it,” he smiled fully, throwing the car into drive and pulling into the road. “Just know, I don't let pretty girls hold their tongue around me.”

You looked out the window in an effort to hide your nervousness. Jake turned his radio on, playing a band you didn't know.

He started humming along to the song as it got closer to the chorus. He had a beautiful voice, which only added to your nervousness.

“Where are we going?” You asked, noticing a familiarity in the direction he was driving in.

He tested his elbow against his center console as he drove with one hand. “I figured I could take you to the library after hours, y'know? We'd be alone but it wouldn't be like you didn't know the place. I can show you my favorite spot, too.”

You shot a glance in his direction. “Jake, isn't it closed?”

“Yeah, and?”

“As in, we can't be there?”

“Yes we can,” he smiled.

You rolled your eyes. “If you're trying to break into a building, I think we should call this off.”

“Relax, sweetheart,” he laughed, his accent shining through, “it's not breaking in.”

“Entering with a key doesn't count.”

“It does when you own the place,” Jake pulled up to a stop light, wiggling his eyebrows at you before laughing loudly. Your jaw was to the floor, an unreadable expression in your eyes. “I've never made it obvious that I owned it, because it was given to me by my grandmother when she retired, but I've owned it since I moved here. My cousin opens the place on weekdays while I go to college, but I close every night and spend the whole weekend there.”

“You'd have to live there to pull that off,” you rolled your eyes.

“I do,” he responded. “My place is right next to it.”

You scoffed, rolling your eyes. “Of course you're handsome, funny, good at singing, and you own a business.”

You felt his hand land on your leg, his fingers tapping rhythmically to the music. You turned to him, your eyes trailing up his arm. “You can continue,” he said with a shit-eating grin.

You lightly hit his arm, pointing to the road. “Light's green,” you turned to hide your blush.

Jake walked you into the familiar building, a small smile on his face as he pulled a projector from the office room. “Come and sit down, pretty girl,” he plugged a handful of cords into the device and turned it on.

You walked past the nonfiction shelves to see pillows forming small seats on the floor, a basket of movie snacks and drinks in the middle. Jake had thrown some last minute fairy lights into the mix, wrapping them around the seating area and putting some candles on the ground. “Jake, this looks amazing.”

He sat on a pillow before laughing and motioning to the other. You ran over, sitting down and immediately putting on a movie.

You didn't watch a single moment of the movie. Although Jake seemed immersed, you couldn't take your eyes off of him. Your eyes took in the slight shine against his skin from the movie, the light in his eyes looking like stars. You didn't miss the way he chewed his tongue when he got focused, or when his hair was blown awry by the air conditioner.

Your brain took a turn for the worse as a more romantic scene in the movie arrived. Your eyes raked over his exposed skin, feeling like a Victorian man who had just been introduced to short sleeves.

You looked at his tattoos, really looked at them, and saw countless music notes with small letters in them, a guitar, small pictures or animals, and a lot of book references. You never expected Jake to have been fully inked up, but you also never expected to find that as a huge turn-on.

You squeezed your thighs together to hide the fact that a simple doodle in perfectly smooth skin had put you in such a predicament. Jake turned to you, wrapping his arm around you and pointing to the screen. “See that actor?”

“Yeah, what about him?” You asked.

Jake let his hand fall onto your lap, turning to you. “Even he can tell you're not paying attention,” he pushed your hair behind your ear. “Wanna tell me what you like so much that you've been staring at me the whole time?”

You gawked. You geeked. You'd fumbled.

Jake slid his hand onto your back, and in a moment he was above you. “Tell me, sweetheart, what's so attractive that it's got you squeezing those pretty thighs so tight?”

You gulped, your thoughts having gone anywhere but where they should. He tapped his finger against your lip, a sinful smile on his face. “Your tattoos,” you whispered.

Jake leaned back, messily pushing his hair out of his face and laughing darkly. “You like my tattoos so much that you're getting wet over them?” He asked, looking down at you.

You nodded. “I like how cool you look, wanna see the rest.”

“You want to see the rest of the ones on me, sweetheart?” He asked in that thick Aussie accent you couldn't get enough of.

With a small squeak, you nodded again, feeling smaller than usual in his gaze. He looked at you the same way you'd assume a predator stared at its prey in its final moments, but you felt a strange sense of safety with him.

He slowly leaned in, his arms caging you in as he pressed his lips to yours. He held your hip with his large hand, his fingers gripping your ass while his palm held you down. He slid his thigh over your core, pressing into where you needed him most.

Your lips parted, letting out a moan. Jake swallowed it whole, sliding his tongue against your own slowly and sucking on your bottom lip. The two of you built a slow rhythm, his thigh grinding into you as you arched your back like clockwork.

His hand never left your hip, holding you in place to keep you victim to his torturously slow lips and thrusts. He loved every noise that left your mouth. Jake pulled away from you, his eyes taking in your wet, puffy lips. The two of you were breathlessly panting to catch your breaths.

His lips parted in thought. “Didn't think you'd be such a good kisser,” he mused. “Almost like you were made for my lips.”

You giggled, pushing him off you as he went to press more kisses to your lips. “Jake, I want to know more about you,” you whined.

“For one, I'm a really good kisser,” he wiggled his eyebrows jokingly as he settled back into his seat. His arms came behind him for support. He seemed to not worry about covering his obvious boner, leaning back and looking at the ceiling.

You hit his arm. “I know that already,” you fussed. “But, like, what are some hobbies of yours?”

He jut his bottom lip out in thought. “I play guitar,” he shrugged, “and there's nothing I love more than getting high and reading a good book.”

You blinked slowly, his eyes coming to yours with a smile. “What does being high even have to do with reading?”

“Makes the experience more realistic. Feels like you're there, you start feeling what the character feels and all,” he sighed. “I like to read romance books, though.”

You bit the back of your lip. “Does that really work?”

“Wanna try it?"

Jake had lit a joint for you, showing you how to hold it and even going so far as to hold it for you while he played with your hair.

The world started to move slower, certain colors waving in your vision. “Do you feel it?” Jake asked, running his hands through your hair. You nodded, looking around the room. “The rest’ll hit soon, just know I'm right here if you need me.”

He put his arm around your shoulders as he took his own hits, resting his head against your own.

He put the joint into a small ashtray, standing with you and grabbing one of the many books he'd brought into the soundproofed study room off a table.

The two of you read through it, laughing when one of you wouldn't be done with the page as fast as the other. Suddenly, the book began to describe a racier scene, one with hands all over the main character's body and kisses being pressed over her.

Jake watched you closely, taking note of how you squirmed in your seat every time the girl felt a new sensation. “What's wrong, Y/N?” Jake asked in a low voice, leaning into you. “You seem… worked up.”

You swallowed hard. “N-No! I’m just cold,” you lied. Jake clicked his tongue, closing the book and holding you by your thigh.

He used his hand to pull you closer, his lips connecting to your own. “Sure, sweetheart. I believe you,” he lied with a smirk. He glanced at your lips again before wrapping his fingers around your throat, pulling you in to continue his rough kiss.

A groan slipped from Jake's own throat, his body reacting before he could. He pulled away, his hand sliding up your closed thighs. “Not,” he continued, connecting your lips again. You opened your legs slightly, giving Jake the ability to use his hand and pry them open.

He ran his fingers up and down your clothed slit, just barely giving you the friction you craved. You felt how hard he was through his jeans, his crotch subtly grinding against your leg. He continued his assault against your lips, never once stopping for air.

You hit his chest, moaning into his mouth as he pulled away. “Jake, stop teasing me.”

“Oh, I'd never tease you, darling,” he responded with a mischievous grin. “Just wanted you to feel how good you're gonna feel with me.”

Jake took his hand off your skirt and brought it into your other hand. He brought his lips to your neck, biting down and tracing the marks with his tongue. You moaned out his name, making him groan lowly into your neck.

“I can't wait anymore,” he said as he stepped back and began unbuckling his belt. “I need to feel your throat around me.”

You stood, walking to be in front of him and pushing his back to the table. His breath caught in his throat as you sank to your knees in front of him. He hurriedly finished unbuckling his belt, reaching his hands to his waistband to pull down the rest of his clothing as you held his hand to stop him.

“Wait, Jake, are you sure about this? We're both high and in a study room in the library, what if the cameras pick up the noise?”

Jake leaned against the table behind him, his hands holding onto the edge of it at his sides. He looked at you with such an intense heat behind his gaze, you could feel the lust of it gathering into your underwear.

He slid a hand into your hair, pulling you to him and smashing his lips to yours. He brought his thigh outwards to catch your body between your legs. Your eyes shut at the feeling, the messy kiss fogging your brain.

“These rooms are sound-proof for two reasons. One, for studying or reading. And two, so I can fuck your throat as hard as I want.”

He released your hair, making you fall back to your knees. He pushed his pants and boxers down to his knees, giving you a grand view of his cock.

It was veiny, thick, and the tip was such an angry red that the precum leaking from it almost screamed for you to lick it all up. Without warning, you grabbed it and took it between your lips.

Jake threw his head back, a moan bouncing off the walls of the room. You heard him suck a breath in through his teeth as you sucked on the tip. You let your tongue glide over his slit, collecting his precum and swallowing it.

“Fuck, Y/N, you're so good at this,” he moaned. Your wetness was dripping down your legs, you felt it. You moaned around him as you took more of him in with hollowed cheeks.

He held the sides of your head, forcing you to look into his eyes. “Remember what I said, sweetheart. Wanna fuck your face, if that's okay.”

You hummed on his dick, giving him the go-ahead. He slowly began to thrust into your mouth, not pushing in all the way. When you began to bob your head further, Jake took it as his sign to go deeper.

He added more force and speed to his thrusts until you were taking him whole, each thrust hitting the bottom of your throat and making you gag around him. Your saliva was dripping down his balls and onto his legs as you used one hand to rub your own clit.

You were so close, but you wanted to wait until his cum was pouring down your throat to finish. “Such a good girl for me, so sweet for taking my dick down her throat,” Jake hummed, his eyes never leaving the sight. It all felt so good.

Jake’s legs began to shake as he let out more moans. Jake was not afraid to be loud, nor was he afraid to speak his mind. He constantly praised you between his little moans.

“Fuck,” he moaned. “‘M so close.”

You moaned against him again, his hips jolting forward. “Gonna make me cum down your throat like that, bet you want that don't you?”

His tip slammed into the back of your throat, his thrusts growing erratic. With each thrust he gave to the back of your throat, you circled your clit faster. “Fuck, ‘m gonna cum,” he groaned.

His hips stuttered to a halt, warm liquid spilling into your stomach. “Taking it so, so good,” he sighed, his hair sticking to the sweat on his forehead. “Atta girl, my girl, so beautiful with my cock down her throat.”

You moaned as you felt your orgasm take over you, moans spilling around Jake’s cock and slightly overstimulating him. He thrusted one more time into you, a lazy smile on his face. He pulled out of you, watching bits of spit and cum dribble down your chin.

You looked like an absolute wreck, your hair messy and your mascara running with spit down your chin. Jake loved it. You looked stunning to him.

“Y/N, that was amazing. Thank you,” he pulled you up to sit you in a chair. He ran out of the room to get water for you, as he'd told you when he walked out.

Your eyes darted around the room. You opened your phone to see four missed calls from both Sunghoon and Jay.

You dialed Jay’s phone number, a groggy smile on your face. “Hey, what's up?”

“Y/N, are you still with Jake?”

“Yes, why?” You asked, stretching in the chair.

He sighed over the phone. “We've been waiting outside the library for half an hour, get the fuck in the car.”

“Jay, I'm capable of bringing myself home-”

“Y/N. Get out of there, now,” Jay said, his tone cold. “I don't know how to say this, but-”

“Jay, you can't control me. I'm an adult,” you rolled your eyes, pacing around the room. “If you're so uncomfortable with me dating someone-”

Jay interrupted you, saying a sentence you'd never think to hear about anyone, much less the guy you sucked off less than three minutes ago. His words had you quickly grabbing your belongings and running out of the building, hoping Jake didn't see you go.

“He’s wanted for murder, Y/N.”

notes: MURDER?? oh boy.. didn't see that one coming ;) expect the next part to be... Eventful. Originally, Jake was supposed to be a camboy, but I figured that possible criminal Jake would be better LMFAO. I reccomend listening to Arctic monkeys or chase Atlantic when you read this series.

tags: @heesitation @vizstars

likes, comments, and reblogs are always appreciated, and thank you for reading! stick around for part 2!!

[mystic-rp-events]

Seems like Sidera has gotten a new idea.

Your characters get yoinked through a pale blue portal, accompanied by mischievous giggling. When the disorientation from unexpectedly traveling through space and time wears off, the surroundings become clear.

Your characters find themselves in the nearly-empty main hall of a large mainly-quartz palace that's illuminated despite there not being any visible light source, and a soft white carpet leading through the room, from the large silvery doors that presumably lead outside, across to stop in front of a polished dark oak table with a white tablecloth and seven elegant chairs evenly spaced on the side facing into the hall. The carpet splits off to either side to doors that lead to other parts of the Palace.

Two more dark tables are in the hall as well, in the rectangles left between the carpet and the walls, though they're both bigger and have less elegant chairs, but more chairs in total.

The only two other entities in the Hall currently are two Draconics sitting across from eachother near the middle of the table to the left side of the main doors.

One Draconic was almost ghostly pale, their long hair being pure white other than black streaks in their bangs framing their face, similarly colored bat-wings folded neatly, like their hands on the table. Their eyes were a bright light blue, and they had three sets of thin grey horns going back and up; the top pair was the longest, while the other two pairs were significantly shorter. They pause what they're saying to stare in confusion at the newcomers.

The other had their back to you, but based on how they were sitting they probably had their feet kicked up onto the table. Their wings were feathered, unlike the other Draconic, and the feathers gradiented from black to dark blue, small silver flecks scattered throughout. Their long brown hair was tied back in a ponytail, and had black streaks at the end 3-4 inches of the hair. Their long and thin tail swished and tapped against the quartz floor, the almost metallic serrated end quietly scraping and clicking against the floor.

( @the-fallen-collective , @onechaotictrio :3 ygs will be doing the threads separately/ as diff timelines basically, so it was easier to just make one post than send the ask to both)

[kikitakite]

I saw your callout in the Gale tag for that one user (no comment on them, tho ty for the callout bc i'd seen them in the notes of my fics) and was curious if you could elaborate on some of the Mystra incidents you described towards the end of the post? I'm new to the lore of the setting and find it hard to research (which makes sense given its importance to dnd), so I've heard a lot of conflicting things about Mystra's portrayal in the wider series. No pressure, obviously!

No problem! And yea, I've seen her arguing in the posts of a few people I follow or just Gale-related posts I find interesting. Usually I don't get involved in stuff like this, but I noticed a constant pattern and then all the homophobic shit so I went off a little.

Unfortunately it's hard to find exact examples of the Mystra lore because certain modules aren't very popular or even free to access, but if you're interested the best way to learn about her is by reading the Elminster novels. There's twelve total, dating all the way back to 1994, and they detail Elminster's adventures. I'll be honest though, some of them are a hard read and written through the lens of a man who's admitted very creative, but also has a lot of problematic ideas.

In the first book Elminster is a child. His entire town gets wiped out by mages, thereby making him hostile toward magic. He sneaks into Mystra's temple to deface her statue one night, but she appears before him and basically gaslights him into learning magic and becoming her rare Chosen. He becomes a wizard and cleric basically overnight, until eventually he multiclasses into pretty much every class type in DnD. As you can imagine a lot of players aren't too fond of Elminster, as he's a well known self-insert of the author and pretty annoying to run into during campaigns. None of my dungeon masters like him anyway.

He also becomes one of Mystra's most loyal followers, but she fucks with him over and over, turning him into a woman to teach him a lesson and SLEEPING with him in that form, berating him when he struggles with the torture he endures when he gets stuck in the hells, making him reproduce without his knowledge and getting jealous when he gives his partners more attention. Because she's a very jealous goddess, which I think the game vaguely touches on but not really.

I wish I had the time to flip through all the novels and give exact citations but the best I can do is suggest them, because they're so eye opening. She's considered a neutral good goddess, but neutral gods often do terrible things for the sake of their domain. I think it needs to be noted that Mystra, as with all gods in the pantheon, only cares about her portfolio. She isn't wrong for that, but it doesn't mean she's blameless when she messes with people's lives. She's done a lot of good but she's also made horrible decisions, especially where her followers are concerned.

For example, Elminster having children he doesn't know about. He has a daughter named Narnra. Her conception was... pretty fucked up. Basically a song dragon named Ammaratha Cyndusk was an occasional lover of Elminster's (he has a lot of those because of course he does) and she wanted to bear his child, but since he's a Chosen of Mystra he can control his fertility. Magic birth control, basically. He didn't want a kid so Ammaratha went behind his back to learn a counterspell that would make him fertile during sex. The man she asked refused to teach her because...duh that's messed up, but then Mystra intervened and told him to teach her the spell because she wanted Elminster's "seed to spread". Ammaratha never told him and neither did Mystra. No matter what the reasons, that was NOT consensual on Elminster's part, and it happened two more times, resulting in two more daughters with different women. If I remember correctly Elminster did eventually find out waaaaay later when they were all adults, but it never amounted to anything.

The sisters I was taking about are the Seven Sisters, Mystra's "daughters". And I put "daughters" in quotations because Mystra possessed the body of a woman named Elué and impregnated her without her consent. She slept with the woman's husband (again, while possessing her body) and made them sire seven children. This of course lead to Elué's death because the constant flow of magic in her body was too much for her to handle. Her grieving husband broke after she died and eventually left, abandoning his daughters and earning Mystra's scorn...as if he was in the wrong. The sisters were then orphaned and raised by foster families.

That said, most of the awful things anyone can say about Mystra were the doings of her previous incarnations so ultimately it doesn't apply to the Mystra of BG3. In fact, this third Mystra is supposed to be a new and improved goddess who's nicer to her followers. So her portrayal in BG3 annoyed a lot of DnD fans. I should also point out that Mystra has two types of fans: ones who will defend everything she does, even when it's fucked up beyond all comprehension, and the ones who will tell you she's a true neutral goddess capable of good and bad. I'm the latter. There are plenty examples of Mystra sticking her neck out for innocents, but there's also examples of her doing the most horrendous shit imaginable.

A lot of veteran players, at least the ones I know, are upset with the portrayal of Mystra in BG3 because her plan to end the Absolute is, quite frankly, stupid. Your party is the best chance anyone has of ending the threat, but she asks Gale to nuke himself and possibly tens of thousands, which makes no sense because she could've just sent her mages/clerics to deal with the problem. And there was no guarantee the bomb would've worked anyway. She put all the responsibility on one man and it DEFINITELY comes off as vindictive. That isn't out if character for her but she's not SUPPOSED to be that bad anymore. For a lot of DnD players it felt like she was reverting back to her old habits.

I think there's also a part in the game where you can directly ask Gale why she doesn't just blip the Absolute out of existence and he says something like, "She could but Ao won't allow it." That was also really strange for a lot of veteran players to hear because Gale drops Ao's name like it's nothing. Most people (especially if they're new to the franchise) wouldn't know this but most people in Faerûn don't know who Ao is! Because he wiped people's memories of his existence! I suppose it does make sense for Gale to know that name, since Mystra probably explained the pantheon to him, but it's VERY unlikely tav would know it. So during that conversation all I could picture was tav tilting their head like, "Huh? Who? Whaaa?"

And on top of that......Ao absolutely WOULD allow it because the Absolute effects the Weave and every other god! It had the potential to ruin the balance of the universe, which makes Ao a very angry boy. Balance is one of the ONLY things he cares about. The Dead Three were stealing souls and worshippers, which gods needs to survive, and dying gods disrupts the balance. It's a whole circle of chaos. So the only conclusion left for me to extrapolate is this: Mystra just really, really wanted Gale to kill himself to prove his devotion to her. Which...isn't great. Bad look for her.

It's kind of like how Raphael thinks the Crown of Karsus is going to help him end the Blood War and take over the hells. DnD players laughed during his epilogue because...no it won't lol. He doesn't stand a chance even with the crown. He's arrogant and he's gonna get slapped by his daddy and all the other archdevils, the same way Gale gets slapped by Mystra if he ascends. Even the Absolute ending of the game wouldn't last long because the gods would go to war with the Dead Three, wipe them out and rebuild Faerûn, which has happened many times in past DnD campaigns. Mystra alone has torn worlds apart and glued them back together. The main crisis of BG3 is saving the world you live in or everybody dies. For the gods it's just a Tuesday. I mean look at how Withers owns the Dead Three with a wave of his hand at the end of the game. Mystra COULD'VE killed the Absolute, just as she could've removed the orb from Gale's chest the moment it happened. She just didn't WANT to. She wanted him to die. She wanted him to chastise himself. She wanted him to suffer and come crawling back to her as an obedient follower. She wanted him to learn a harsh and honestly unfair lesson, which is a terrible throwback to her previous incarnations.

[cryptotheism]

Cant totally agree there honestly. Yes jung was totally far more of an occultist than a man of science, but saying the psychological reading of alchemy isnt there is a bit dubious to me. For instance the chymical wedding of crc are basically entirely focused on alchemy as self improvement and make it fairly clear physical matter or immortality is not the goal

From day six, after all but three alchemists are deceived from participating in the real final stage of the great work - “Here we had leisure to look a while at our companions through certain crevices made in the floor. They were now very busy at a furnace, and each had to blow up the fire himself with a pipe, and they stood blowing about it like this, as if they were wondrously preferred before us in this.”

And shortly later: “Now it was also time for the Virgin to see how other artists behaved themselves. They were well pleased because, as the Virgin afterwards informed me, they were to work in gold, which is indeed a piece of this art, but not the most principal, most necessary, and best. They had indeed too a part of these ashes, so that they imagined nothing other than that the whole bird was provided for the sake of gold, and that life must thereby be restored to the deceased.”

And in day seven, as the order is given their vows- “(5) That you shall not be willing to live longer than God will have you do. At this last article we could not choose but laugh, and it may well have been placed after the rest only for a conceit.”

The rest of the text makes it fairly clear that it is concerned with an inner journey/self improvement/understanding the nature of the self. For instance there isnt any subtlety made about ‘the virgin’ being the protagonists feminine reflection.

So its certainly there. Does jung carelessly knock everything else off the table to focus on it? Perhaps, but still.

THE PSYCHOLOGICAL READING OF ALCHEMY DOESNT TAKE SHAPE UNTIL PARACELSUS IN THE 17TH CENTURY.

Chymical Wedding is a result of the post-paracelcian shift. It is clearly intended to have a personal spiritual reading akin to how Jung reads it. I would go so far as to say Jungian psychology barely diverges from the theory of the self put forth in Chymical Wedding. It's dope. It's one of my favorite occult texts of all time.

JUNG was not just applying the psychological reading to Chymical Wedding. He was applying it to fucking ZOSIMOS. Who was writing in fucking 300 AD. He read Chymical Wedding, and retroactively applied his reading to the previous 1600 years of alchemical history, making the case that ALL alchemical texts were actually just ancient psychological textbooks. Which his bullshit.

[dear-ao3]

how to get f1 driver cards, a guide for mclaren, mercedes and williams (more to come)

im going to start by saying that there is a high high chance not everything on this is accurate. for some reason this is a stupidly complex process and i am just trying my best :)

what are driver cards? every year (most) teams have cards made of their drivers with their pictures and sometimes stats and fun facts, etc. they change every year and are collectible. theyre free, technically, as long as you pay for the postage.

ive sent away for some of them before, and those are the teams i have included as i know these ones work. will add more teams on as i attempt others this year.

MERCEDES

objectively this is the easiest one to get. you fill out an online form and if you are lucky you will get cards sent to you. the form is live for the 2025 cards as of me posting this.

beware: the address form is formatted for UK addresses only for some reason. if you are trying to send to the US with an address that is two lines (ie, a street address with an apartment number or a po box) there is a good chance it wont work. i have gotten it to work for street addresses only (both attempts to have them sent to an apartment address failed). this one also took the longest, several months.

all other teams require a double envelope, stamp and letter situation.

very basically, you address an envelope to the team and put yourself as the return address. it needs a stamp (domestic if the team is in your country, international if it is not)

write a letter to the team, something along the lines of "dear x team, i am a big fan of you and your drivers x and y and i like watching you / rooting for you for xyz reasoning (etc etc). i was wondering if i could get the 20xx drivers cards? thanks (name)." it doesnt have to be super fancy.

put this letter in the envelope along with another a5 size folded envelope addressed to yourself (this is the envelope that the team will send your cards in, make sure it is the right size and also has your correct address.

the a5 envelope also needs a stamp and here is where it gets a little tricky. if the team is based in the same country you are you use a domestic stamp. if you are Not in the same country as the team this is the terribly fun (read: tricky) part.

you can either include the pounds/euros needed to buy a stamp in the envelope or you can purchase an international stamp from that country and use that. i have gone the stamp route before (ordered royal mail stamps off of British amazon) and it worked. i put five second class barcoded stamps on each envelope and they came back to me okay. (could also use first class stamps, i dont remember why i ended up choosing the second class ones) (you have to check the stamp prices and make sure that the total stamp costs equal how much it costs to send a letter internationally (second class stamps are 85p as of me writing this and it costs 2.80 pounds to mail a letter internationally from the uk to the us specifically (all of this is findable on the royal mail site) so i would put 4 or 5 stamps to be safe per envelope in case stamp prices rise again)

put that whole folded envelope and your letter in your addressed envelope to the team and mail it out.

MCLAREN

they seem to be pretty responsive. i got my card for mclaren within i think 2 or 3 months. be extra careful when addressing your envelopes to the uk, the seven letter/ number combination is the most important and should be the most legible thing. i think this is formatted correctly. (again, im from the us. uk addresses confuse the hell out of me)

address:

FAO: Autograph Cards McLaren Technology Centre Chertsey Road Woking GU21 4YH UK

WILLIAMS

again, they were pretty responsive. i think i got mine in 2 or 3 months. my envelope was the wrong size for this team but they sent me the cards anyway in a different size envelope. again, really make sure that your seven number/letter thing is clear. there both a O and 0 in it so i would put a slash through the 0.

address:

Fan Mail Williams Grand Prix Engineering Grove Wantage Oxfordshire OX12 0DQ UK

fun little note: my sister and i both sent away for mclaren and williams last year. despite them having the Exact Same Addresses and being sent from The Exact Same Post Office on the Exact Same Day, my mclaren one was returned to sender for the reason unable to be delivered. my sister got her mclaren card in the mail the next week. and i got my williams card but my sisters got returned to sender for the reason of unable to be delivered. i have absolutely no idea why. not remotely. i resent both of them and had no problems the second time around.

good luck. its kinda challenging but it is fun. im going to try to send off for more this year so ill provide more advice once i figure it out but as for now, i know these ones work. i would wait until the start of the season to mail any requests, though fill out the mercedes one sooner if you want that :)

and, proof that i got my driver cards and im not just making this up:

[torakowalski]

(part one | part seven)

"Yes," says Eddie when Steve cups his face with one strong hand.

He says, "Yes," when Steve kisses him too. Says, "Yes," again, when Steve slides his free hand into Eddie's armpit and pulls him up onto the bed.

They land with a bounce, Eddie half under Steve. He looks at Steve, gorgeous and pink-cheeked, braced above him, lips still slightly parted, and says, "Wait."

Shit, he is not a fan of himself, right now.

Steve waits. He leans back a little, looking like he's bracing himself for whatever Eddie's about to say.

"What's happening?" Eddie asks. "Don't say kissing."

Steve pouts like Eddie is robbing him of all his simple pleasures. "I, uh, I mean I'm not totally sure." He bites his lip. "I wanted to kiss you, so I did."

Okay, Eddie is calm. Eddie is calm about Steve wanting to kiss him.

"Weird reaction to making the team?" he guesses.

Steve scrunches up his face, like he's thinking about it. "I don't think so. I wanted to kiss you before I made the team."

"You... did?"

Steve is still very much hovering above Eddie. It seems like he might not have noticed that he's basically doing a plank while having this conversation. Stupid swimmer's arms. His t-shirt is hanging down, away from his stomach, and Eddie desperately wants to touch his bare skin. He bets he's really, really warm there.

"How long before?" Eddie adds, without giving Steve time to answer the first question.

"Since you cheered for me," Steve says, which doesn't narrow it down at all, until it does. "I fucked up my first couple of races, but then I saw you yelling for me from the stands, and I thought I can't wait to kiss him for that, later. Took me an extra couple seconds to realise that we don't kiss, and then I couldn't think of a good reason why not."

That was maybe two hours ago, and that's only if Eddie is feeling generous with time.

"Steve, you can't just..."

"I know," Steve interrupts. "I know I'm supposed to take time to freak out and panic and think about what this _means_ and worry about all the things that Robin worries about, but I'm just... You know me, I do things, I don't think about them first. I really don't feel any need to think about this, either."

He looks down at Eddie with his big, dark eyes all genuine and sincere. And yup. Yup Eddie is going to get his heartbroken so very badly.

Eddie shakes his head at himself and his own stupid decision making. "A good person would say you need to take your time and not rush into this." Steve looks genuinely disappointed, which Eddie cannot stand. "I, however, am the son of Satan, remember?"

"Oh, shucks, I thought you were just a Satan worshipper," Steve says. "I didn't realise you were like, Hell Jesus. You should have said something."

Eddie snorts a laugh. It's kind of gross honestly, but Steve just smirks. Fucker.

"Put that face to better use and kiss me," Eddie orders. He's glad he sounds confident because he does not feel it.

Steve's smirk because a smile, all sunny and surprised. "Yeah?"

"Just until you come to your senses." Eddie reaches up, puts his hand on the back of Steve's neck. His hair is damp against Eddie's palm and his skin is smooth and hot.

"That's gonna be a while, I think," says Steve. He lowers himself down onto his elbows so their chests are barely a breath apart, presses a kiss to Eddie's mouth.

It's not Eddie's first kiss or anything, but it's definitely within his first... three kisses. He hopes like hell he's doing it right. At first, it's closed mouths, lips moving gently together but then Eddie feels a burst of total daring and parts his lips. Steve hums happily and dips the tip of his tongue into Eddie's mouth.

Fuck, holy fuck, this is really happening. Eddie can taste Steve's spit. That never happens in his dreams.

He hears himself make a noise and his hand clenches, squeezing the nape of Steve's neck. He squirms a little, gets his other arm around Steve's back, hand flat just above the waistband of his pants.

Steve makes a very happy hum, licks into Eddie's mouth, and then they're definitely not just kissing; this is definitely making out.

Eddie's hard in seconds, but this isn't the time, so he's gonna ignore that. It's more difficult to ignore how fast his nipples go tight, aching with it until all he can do is pull Steve down, press up into him, until they're chest to chest.

He wishes their shirts would melt away. He wants Steve's skin against his own. Preferably, he wants all of Steve's thick, ridiculous chest hair for this half-hour of madness, but he'll take the smooth, waxed version too.

"Ed," Steve says into his mouth. His fingers have knotted in Eddie's hair. "Eddie, can we lose our shirts?"

"Are you an actual mind reader?" asks Eddie, which just makes Steve laugh.

Steve sits up, grabs the back of his t-shirt, and is just above to pull it over his head when the room phone rings.

They both freeze.

"Fuck. Dinner," Steve says, eyes wide. Eddie hadn't realised he'd forgotten about it; that's pretty gratifying.

Eddie grabs the phone, since it seems the gentlemanly thing to do.

"Where are you?" Dustin whines. "We're starving."

"Eat bread sticks," Eddie tells him, watching sadly as Steve lets his t-shirt settle back down around his body.

"We've eaten them all," Dustin says. "What are you even doing? You've been ages."

Eddie flops backwards onto the bed. He knew making out with Steve wasn't going to last, but he thinks the universe could have let him have a little more time with it.

"Team USA here has to do his hair all pretty," he lies, sending Steve an apologetic look.

Steve rolls his eyes.

Judging by the noise Dustin makes, he does the same.

"Well, tell him to hurry up. Your uncle just called Ma 'ma'am,' and she giggled. I need back-up."

Huh. Go Uncle Wayne. "We're hurrying," he promises. "Order without us and we'll be there stat."

"I'm ordering the steak," Dustin says, like he thinks Eddie is the one paying and hangs up.

Steve has moved to sit on the edge of the bed. He gives Eddie a wonky smile. "We really should get ready to go."

Eddie rubs his hands over his face and doesn't let himself think about whether Steve sounds regretful. (He really does think Steve might sound regretful.)

"Yeah. Apparently my uncle is flirting with Mrs Henderson, and Dustin's at risk of both a stroke and starvation."

"God forbid he reacts to something calmly," Steve says, a smile still in his voice. "I'll go shower."

He stands up. Then he sits down again. He reaches out and curls his long fingers around Eddie's wrist. "I haven't come to my senses yet."

"Hm?" Eddie asks.

"You said, you said you'd kiss me until I came to my senses. I still feel totally senseless, so maybe we could kiss more after dinner?"

Fuck. How is Eddie supposed to eat now? Or hold a conversation like a normal person.

"Um," he says. "I, uh. I did say that, and I never go back on my word."

Steve squeezes Eddie's wrist then briefly tangles their fingers together. "Wanna shower together?"

He bounces his eyebrows, so Eddie doesn't think he's serious. It makes him want to say yes just to see what Steve would do. Except he knows what Steve would do, he'd go through with it, and neither of them are ready for that.

"Not on our first date," he says. "Hit me up when you've got a gold medal, and we'll see."

"Maybe I'll hold you to that," Steve says. He gets up and heads off to the shower, whistling as he goes.

(continued here)

[aezuria]

*ੈ✎ something happens and i'm head over heels!

—head over heels; tears for fears

content: leo valdez x daughter of aphrodite! reader; oneshot

╰┈▸ back cover: part I | part II | part III

warnings: cursing probs, excessive use of like and totally and literally, the seven as found family BECAUSE WDYM THATS NOT CANON

librarian's annotations: delusional guy x delusional girl???? im projecting again also i need yall to be creative and imagine they can use phones in chb

"guys, i was screaming her name in my head and then she looked at me! it's gotta be a sign!"

cue the synchronized groans.

"that totally means you should ask her out already!" that was percy.

"you have no chance with her, get over it!" frank, obviously.

"leo, you're my best friend, so i hate to break it to you, but maybe you're looking for signs that just.. aren't there?" jason, ever the sensible one.

leo scoffs and sits up on his makeshift bed—two old mattresses stacked on top of each other, ones he dragged from the hypnos cabin into bunker 9—and squeezed his pillow. "jason! a real best friend would encourage me! like percy!" he batted his eyelashes exaggeratedly at the boy sprawled on the floor in front of him.

percy met his eyes with a wink, holding a mock salute to his forehead. "that's me!"

the two other guys shared a look, almost saying are we really friends with these idiots? as if they could be talking.

alldaladiesluvleo shared a note "yo chat, does she like me back?"

"oh my gods you will not believe what just happened!" you practically squealed, feet actually kicking as you laid on your stomach. "so basically— remember this morning the apollo kids made will sing a country song in front of everybody at breakfast?" you didn't wait for any sounds of affirmation from your siblings before you continued. "it was hilarious, and i obviously looked over at leo because, y'know, he's a country guy too, totally not because his laugh is adorable. and guess what? he was already looking at me!" you let an embarrassing giggle into your pillow before you could even explain why this was so crazy. "and like, you know how everyone says you look at the person you like first when something funny happens? guys, i think he totally likes me!"

varied reactions swept through the whole cabin. some, even though you were the children of love, had already grown tired of your "gossip sessions" over basically nothing. others, happily fed your delusions.

"oh my gods, he totally does!"

"are you seriously basing this off a tiktok you saw?"

"he doesn't even look that good.."

um, what was that last comment? you whipped your head to where the sound came from. "what do you even mean? do you have eyes? do you need glasses? can you not see how hot he is? he literally has fire powers! how cute he is? and he's like, scrawny and has a good sense of humor, and confident, and his smile..." the poor new camper, knowing nothing about what was wrong with his statement, was quickly overwhelmed. the others tuned out your rant, having already given their opinions on him and met with the same speech. you sighed, flopping onto your back. "he's so my type."

“i saw him trip on tree root and start talking to it about how rude that was.”

“...what if i said that didn’t give me the ick?”

loveloveyn shared a note "want my man thats not my man fr"

"you guys saw y/n's note, right?" percy asked nonchalantly, scrolling through his instagram feed.

"yeah," jason and frank said in unison.

"no?" leo's head turned side-to-side comically as he looked between the three. "what? her account's private how'd you see?" leo's eyebrows furrowed in concentration as he pieced it together.

"you guys follow her!?" he gasped incredulously. "since when!? why didn't you guys tell me!? and why does she follow all of you back!?"

the three of them shared a look. jason was the first to speak. "well, she followed us first, but it's 'cause she follows everyone! and she's a mutual friend so we followed her back." he shrugged. (they followed her back to stalk her for him, as all best friends would do.)

leo sputtered, his body deflating like a balloon with the air let out. "but she doesn't follow me..." he pouted.

percy to the rescue, once again! "bro, she's probably just shy! like, she followed all of us except you! and she's close friends with piper, and you're close friends with piper, so she'd have no good reason to not follow you except for that!" he gave leo a good-natured pat on the back, trying to soothe his comedian-in-arms.

leo sighed, but brightened up a little bit. "you really think so?"

"yeah!" percy nodded, looking over at the other two once leo turned his back, wincing. who's gonna tell him?

"wait, what was her note?"

"..."

"guys?"

alldaladiesluvleo shared a note "all of yall are FAKE im moving back to texas"

"why doesn't he follow me!? like he follows you, obviously, and annabeth, and hazel, but not me!? what the fuck, man!?" you groaned, slumping onto piper's shoulder, the other two girls sitting in front of you.

annabeth sighed. "have you tried, i don't know, following him first?"

you and piper shared simultaneous gasps. "no! that's like, just, no!"

piper shook her head firmly as she agreed with your disagreeing. "not an option."

hazel finally spoke up. "but don't you want to get closer to him? wouldn't following him do that?"

you put a hand over your heart, emphasizing the gesture. "oh hazel, you've been away for too long. say it with me, 'i don't chase, i attract.'"

"hell yeah!" piper called from the side.

"you're just too much of a coward to ask him out." annabeth deadpanned, making piper snort.

"you're right."

"why are you switching up so fast!?" your head hurt from the whiplash you got.

"because i need help knocking some sense into your delusional ass." annabeth answered for her, an unamused smirk on her face.

"ow! are you trying to break my already fragile heart!?"

loveloveyn shared a note "BETRAYING ME FOR A HOT BLONDE IS SO LOW (id do the same)"

[quasi-normalcy]

Every "Nu Trek" (2017- ) Series Ranked from Worst to Best:

Very Short Treks (2023): There's really no words for just how terrible this series is. I mean, I know that it only barely counts because it's explicitly not canon and has a total combined run time of about 15 minutes, but *my god* is it bad! Only one of its episodes is remotely funny, and even that manages to feel like it's driven its main joke into the ground by the end of its 2-minute runtime. The only thing that I can say for it is that is that it gives me an easy, uncontroversial choice for worst Star Trek series, not only of the last 7 years, but of all time.

Picard (2020-2023): Listen; I know that this series is unpopular with the Tumblr Trek fandom, but it actually breaks my heart to have to put it so low on the list. It has, in my own opinion, the best dramatic acting of any Trek series and among the best directing, and almost every individual scene, in isolation, is compellingly watchable. More than that, it has fascinating worldbuilding choices, you can really *see* the passion of the writers for what they're creating (at least in the first and third seasons), and Agnes in particular is among my favourite characters in anything ever. It's got a lot of great moments, too! Picard and Seven bonding over shared Borg trauma; Soji uncovering the truth of her identity; Jurati hacking the Borg Queen's brain; Picard's final farewell to Q; Shaw's Wolf 359 monologue; Geordi's reunion with Data...I could go on. And yet, it just feels like so much *less* than the sum of its parts! Incredible ideas are introduced and then just shrugged off to pursue much more boring ones. Story arcs feel pointless if not actively offensive. Absolutely baffling writing choices are made throughout, with no indication as to why. And the nostalgia baiting , particularly in the final season, becomes so intense that it just chokes the plot to death. One comes away haunted by the feeling that this series should be so much better than it is.

Discovery (2017-2024): Really, this is two separate series: a twisty, grimdark, sci-fi war drama and a gentle queer coffeeshop AU about scientists who talk about their feelings. Both of them have their moments, but they each fall down in the same way: a focus on epic, high-stakes mystery box storytelling that undermines one's ability to really get invested in the characters, or even know who they are when they aren't off saving the universe. Without that, while I liked many of the characters and loved seeing them science the shit out of things using teamwork and the power of math, it's kind of difficult to get invested in this series one way or another. In spite of its absolutely gorgeous visuals, it comes off feeling weirdly...flat.

Short Treks (2018-2020): Not a lot to talk about here; just kind of an anthology series of short films adjacent to Discovery, Picard, and Strange New Worlds. Mostly they're varying shades of mediocre, but a few of them are as brilliant as any episode of Star Trek ever made, so the series gets to be relatively high on the list.

Strange New Worlds (2022- ): This is the first entry on this list that, in my opinion, belongs on the top shelf with some of the best of the older series. And it achieves it basically by adopting the same formula as the original series or the next generation--socially conscious planet-of-the-week adventures with enough wit, cleverness and joie-de-vivre to keep it interesting. I remember in 2017, there was plenty of discussion of how it's possible to update Star Trek's formula for prestige television; how funny that the solution turned out to be "don't change it at all, just give it modern special effects and actual character arcs." That said, the series is a bit *too* beholden to the original, with focus primarily on a bunch of characters who aren't allowed to grow or change too much because we already know how they'll turn out. It would be even better if it were about a new ship and a new crew full of nobodies who we can come to love. Which brings us to...

Lower Decks (2020-2024): Above, I said that Picard felt like it should have been so much better than it was. Lower Decks, frankly, should have been so much worse. How is an adult animated sitcom with Rick and Morty style animation and constant memberberries this freaking good!?! Every episode is a master class in efficient storytelling, with 22 minute runtimes often feeling like they contain as much story and character work as episodes twice as long. And the characters are incredible--like TOS and TNG, they feel almost archetypal, and even though you've never seen them before, they slide so seamlessly into the Star Trek universe that it's hard to believe that they weren't just *always* there; that there was ever a time when you could imagine the Star Trek universe without just intrinsically knowing that Tendi and Shaxs and Mariner were off somewhere in the background. It's greatest success though, the reason why it's comedy works when it really shouldn't, is that it's only *slightly* sillier than the serious series. What we end up with a fantastic series with an ethos that is pure Star Trek, and in fact, if I had written this list a month ago, it would certainly be in the #1 spot. However...

Prodigy (2021-2024?): The first season of Prodigy is...charming. It's got some fun characters, some spectacular visuals, some interesting premises. And if the plots tend to be a little too simplistic to be engaging to an adult, hey, it's a kids' show. It's good. Solid. Above average. And if I had only the first season to go on, it would probably be in third position on this list. But then, a few weeks ago, it went ahead and dropped the best season of Star Trek in a quarter-century, and I really...I just cannot recommend this series highly enough. The sheer, ambitious scope of the narrative; the arcs it puts its character through; the cleverness of the writing; the fricking GORGEOUSNESS of it! And it does all this while redeeming deeply unpopular characters and plot points from other series, in a way that never feels forced or pandering. Not only is it the best Star Trek series of the 21st century, it's one of the best children's animated series since AtLA. Go. Go! Watch it! Watch it now!

[kazzsk2]

Info dumping about resurrected sacrifice au but it's from my text last night to someone who was willing to listen to my ramblings 😌

(Also these are the major outfits the lamb wears in this au)

Anyways, in the au (specifically the resurrection on) it's separated into three parts right. And the story actually starts before the initial seven resurrections it to bring lamb back and make them stay. It's starts right at the time of the lamb's execution and I saw this one post about another person's au saying that the lamb would be executed in their wedding clothes so I kinda took that idea as well to a certain extent.

So basically lamb was executed in wedding attire which narinder took a certain way (kind of considered a miscommunication) and that kind of fueled the desire to resurrect lamb.

This was only heightened with seeing the last remnants of the lamb begin to dissappear like the followers that personally connected with the lamb dying from old age, the statues of them being dirty and covered in overgrown plants, and new decorations for narinder beginning to overtake the old ones. Narinder began to grow quiet and started to wear the viel around this time.

His siblings began to take notice of this, especially shamura. Shamura was the one to actually suggest the whole resurrection thing and though he meant well, this actually kinda ruined narinder's mental health

He began to obess over the possibility of bring the lamb back to the point he had to do the resurrections in secret to avoid his siblings from stopping him. Then, after the several resurrections, he gets the lamb to stay by a five year agreement and does his best over the first part of the story to get them to agree to stay after five years.

During this time, I wanted to make it very comedic but at the same time like super sad undertones. Like totally funny way of doing something but when you really pay attention to the words it's actually sad.

Nearing the end of this first arc is when narinder and lamb have an argument and lamb is like "why don't you beg for me to stay, since you're desperate for your dear vessel back" as more of a (idk the word) snag at narinder, not actually expecting him to do so. But he literally does so and that's when lamb is like "bro I think this is like seriously screwed up and we should talk through this like normal people" this is also the first time narinder vocally speaks as throughout the whole first part, he is mute besides sign language & when he does sermons/rituals for the cult.

This is when lamb & narinder talk and get their biggest insecurities and worries out in the air. The lamb's biggest one being that he's the last of his kind and death was the only way to be connected back with those he lost. Narinder's biggest was how he treated lamb like an object and without the love they deserved. His second being that it felt as though he always bought harm upon the lamb no matter how badly he tried to fix it.

This leads into the second part of the story which is the turn in the two's relationship (& where the lamb starts catching feelings). I want to use the trope where like one falls first but the other falls the hardest with like lamb and narinder with narinder falling first but lamb falling hardest. As they work through their problems and find ways around the ones they cannot fix that easily, the lamb begins to get the feelings & at first hates himself for it. He has a whole inner dilemma of fighting that he wouldn't stay for the 5 years, that narinder had been willing to kill him so easily for power what's stopping him from doing it again, and the fact that falling in love with narinder would be falling in love with the brother of those who murdered their kind.

They managed to (also totally random but I use the headcanon that lamb goes by they/he just in case cuz I keep switching it up) work through their thoughts tho and accept the fact that they have fallen for narinder and it isn't exactly a bad thing.

Most of this part is just the start of their relationship and working it all out like how any semi normal relationship between two people with deep pasts and hidden issues hidden in their bones work. The first half is all the nitty gritty and then the second half is pure fluff

& then the last part is just domestic life epilogue 😌 nothing really serious besides introducing the shitten (hehehe shit-ten).

Ok that's all

[artbyblastweave]

I think about Star Wars a lot more than I post about Star Wars, and I've had some free time recently to type up some thoughts on Episode 7 that've been swirling around in my head for a couple of years. There were a few ideas and plot beats, and moments of apparent self-examination in Episode 7 which I thought were fairly compelling, even though they ultimately paid no dividends:

First was Finn’s character concept. “Star Wars as experienced from the perspective of a Stormtrooper undergoing a crisis of faith” is a rich hook; humanizing and giving a face to what's basically the platonic implementation of the faceless mook. Unfortunately, the potency of the arc was undercut by the pre-existing textual ambiguity as to what stormtroopers actually are. Star Wars extended canon has settled on the idea that each trilogy features an entirely novel cohort of white-clad mooks, each with a fundamentally different underlying dynamic. The clones and the First-Order forces are different flavors of slave army; in contrast, the stormtroopers are more frequently portrayed in the expanded universe as military careerists, stormtrooper being a thing you work up to rather than a gig for a fresh conscript. A slave-soldier who defects is a very different character from a military careerist who defects, and they invite different analysis. There's a bait-and-switch going on here, in that Finn gestures in the direction of the familiar OT stormtroopers but can't comment on or examine them because he's actually part of a novel dynamic invented for the new movies. And there's one final nail in the coffin here, signaled by the number of times I've had to invoke the expanded universe so far. When Finn debuted, the racists were of course, legion, but I also ran into a number of people who were sincerely confused as to why they'd recast Temuera Morrison. Going off the seven films that existed at the time, it wasn't unreasonable to read the prequel trilogy as an origin story for where the OT stormtroopers came from. Going only off the nine films that exist now, it still isn't unreasonable! It's muddied from so many different directions by their failure to establish the ground rules in the mainline films before they tried to put on subversive airs about it. I am still irritated by this.

Next up is how Han Solo was written. I actually liked the tack they took with him quite a bit. Because initially, right, his role in the movie is just to be Han Solo. He's back, and he hasn't changed! He's still kicking ass and taking names, he's still the lovable scoundrel you knew and loved from your childhood- and the principle cast members react to his presence with the same reverence the film's trying to invoke in the audience, they've grown up hearing the same stories about him. Except that episode 7, at least, is also very aware of the fact that if Han Solo is still recognizably the same guy thirty years on, it indicates that things have gone totally off the rails for him. We find out that the lovable rogue routine is the result of him backsliding, his happy ending blown up by massive personal tragedy rooted in communicative failures and (implicitly) his parental shortcomings. It feels deliberately in conversation with the nostalgic impulse driving the entire film- here's your childhood hero back just as you remember, here's what that stagnation costs. And it also feels like it's in conversation with what was a fairly common strain of Han Solo Take- the idea that Ep. 6 cuts off at a very convenient point, and that Han and Leia's fly-by-night wartime relationship wouldn't survive the rigors of domesticity. Obviously, that's not the only direction you can take with the character; the old EU basically threaded the needle of keeping Han recognizable without rolling back his character development gains. But it felt like they were actually committing to a direction, a direction that was aware of the space, and not a reflexively deferential and flattering one, which at the time I appreciated! The problem, of course, is that for it to really land, you need to have a really, really strong idea of what actually went down-of what Han's specific shortcomings and failures were. And given the game of ping-pong they proceeded to play with Kylo Ren's characterization, this turned out to be. Less than doable.

Kylo Ren is the third thing about Episode 7 that I liked. His character concept is basically an extended admission by the filmmakers that there's no way to top Vader as an antagonist. Instead, they lean into the opposite direction- they make him underwhelming on purpose. Someone who's chasing Vader's legacy in the same way any post-OT Star Wars villain is going to, pursuing Vader's aesthetic and the associated power without really understanding or undergoing the convoluted web of suffering and dysfunction that produced Vader. It's framed as a genuine twist that there's nothing particularly wrong with his face under that helmet. Whatever it takes to be Vader, he doesn't have it, and he knows that he doesn't have it, and the pursuit of it drives him to greater and greater acts of cartoonish villainy. The failure to one-up Vader is offloaded to the character instead of the writers, and it was genuinely interesting to watch. For one movie. The problem, of course, is that if the entire character archetype is "Vader, but less compelling," you can't try to give the bastard Vader's exact character arc. You can't retroactively bolt on a Vader-tier tragic backstory when you spent a whole movie signaling that whatever happened to him wasn't as compelling as what happened to Vader. You can't milk his angst for two more movies when it's the kind of angst on display in "Rocking the Suburbs" by Ben Folds!

There's a level on which I feel like Moff Gideon was a semi-successful implementation of Vader-Wannabe concept; he's the same kind of middling operator courting the Vader Aesthetic for clout, but he's doing it in the context of the imperial warlord era, where there's a lot of practical power available to anyone who can paint themselves to the Imperial Remnants as a plausible successor to Vader. Hand in Hand with this obvious politicking, Gideon is loathsome, which relieves the writers of the burden of having to plausibly redeem the guy; he's doing exactly what he needs to do and there'll never be a mandate to expand him beyond what his characterization can support. Unfortunately, the calculated and cynical nature of how he's emulating Vader precludes the immaturity and hero-worship elements on display with Kylo, which is unfortunate; the sincerity on display in Kylo's pursuit of authenticity is an important part of why he worked, to the extent that he worked at all, and it'd be worth unpacking in a better trilogy. As he stands Kylo is a clever idea, and that's all he is- he lacks the scaffolding to go from merely clever to actively good.

[lizardsfromspace]

The Claim: they've erased Discovery from canon. It's not longer canon! CONFIRMED! They announced Star Trek Discovery was WIPED from canon, even though it has one ongoing spin-off, has a spin-off movie set to debut, another spin-off series filming, and has been referenced extensively in every other modern Star Trek show, and the producers and writers of it are still in charge of modern Star Trek, they definitely made it non-canon just to appease internet people who are mad at if for reasons that are definitely not just racism and misogyny

The Article: not linked in this tweet! Odd! Why would you not want to link your source?

The Evidence: Lower Decks featured a cameo by the alternate Klingon makeup

This brief cameo PROVES Discovery is in an alternate universe.

Which wouldn't make it non-canon. After all the Kelvin timeline movies are set in an alternate universe, and they're unambiguously canon to mainline Trek.

On a Watsonian level, they could've become a Disco Klingon from another universe while they still exist in the main one. Or maybe in another universe that's what that Klingon looks like. It's canon that Klingons have multiple appearances due to the virus from Enterprise's final season, so why not?

But confirmed! The show they definitely didn't just hate for having a woman of color as its star is no longer canon because of a brief Easter egg in a cartoon! Multiple sites are reporting this!

Discovery is no longer canon! Thanks, one second long joke, for giving shouty man nerds a chance to Make Trek Great Again

One fun aspect of this is that you can tell the first article I capped was written by someone not really familiar with the show himself who was just copying this other article; because the earlier one - linked & paraphrased frequently in the article the alcoholic film screamer shared - says the show was retooled after season two, and the quote-filled article mangles this as "the show was sent to the future for the last two seasons". Which isn't true - they spend three seasons in the future, not two. The rabid internet nerds aren't even watching the shows they're quaking with rage about, they're just copying from each other. "Why don't these networks not care about pleasing people who provably don't watch their shows? HIRE NON-FANS PLAGIARIZING OTHER NON-FANS!!!!"

The wild part is, these pieces present it as if the only flaw in Discovery is that they changed the Klingon's makeup design. This alone is enough to exile it from canon. You may think "wait, but the show already addressed it, first by having them grow hair in season 2 of Disco & explaining why they hadn't, and then by restoring the original makeup in SNW", and they have an explanation: SNW is still canon bc it's not canon to Disco, the show it references many times, because it's actually about a slightly different Enterprise in an alternate timeline, since establishing two parallel Enterprises that are 90% the same but in different universes, and never directly stating this except via buried clues in a different spinoff, makes a lot more sense than saying a popular TV show you don't personally like exists

It's funny how they harp on about how the Klingons look and ignore other changes. SNW has turned the Gorn from an allegory - seeming aggressors who turn out to be the ones who were invaded, and whose Captain is clearly set up as an analogue for Kirk - into pure evil slaving xenomorph knock-offs who not only have zero depth or meaning, but who are proudly Just Evil. Seems like a much more important change than the Klingons having somewhat different heads, but I've seen basically none of that crowd comment on the Gorn except to say they're Totally Badass Now, while they're still so enraged by a change in Klingon makeup design that happened seven years ago & that was retconned five years ago & abandoned fully since over a year ago they're writing long articles analyzing how a throwaway gag in a cartoon is a secret sign a show they dislike for totally not racist reasons is non-canon. After years of speculation that Kurtzman was secretly fired, they've now just evolved into full on Trekanon. Incredible