#sniper mask headcanons

[aretheyqueer]

Is he aroace?

disclaimer: this is a hc, not speculating on what the writers intentions were.

reason: He gets in stairs first not to see women's panties and covers his face with his hat when there's fanservice not to see it when other characters (both make and female) are being all blushy about it. And he's aro too because I said so

[im-no-jedi]

TBB headcanons: Physical and Mental Traits

I was originally gonna break these posts up by character, but it’s more fun just categorizing everything (plus I get to make more posts this way hehe)

anyway! here are some traits I believe each of the boys have:

Hunter

Oldest of the og four (CT 9901) 

All of his senses are heightened, which makes him more sensitive to things (smells, sounds, touch, etc) but he’s REALLY good at hiding it

Occasionally experiences sensory overload, but has several techniques to keep himself calm (stimming with his knife, meditation, isolation, listening to music, conversing with one of his bros or Omega) 

Is autistic, but is good at masking it most of the time 

Very, very rarely experiences panic attacks from overstimulation (happened mostly as a child, has only happened once during the war) 

Has a high level of tolerance for pain, despite his heightened senses (mostly is just good at hiding it though)

Has a scar over his left eyebrow that he got due to accidentally cutting himself with a knife when he was younger (he has perfectionist issues because of this); has other various scars all over his body (main ones being on his left pectoral from getting shot by Cad Bane, and slight burn marks on the palm of his right hand from the Zygerrian whip)

Fairly introverted; he likes his solitude but gets lonely at times and can NOT be away from the squad for too long or he’ll go crazy

Tech

Second oldest of the og four (CT 9902) 

Retains information the first time it’s told/explained to him (the recording thing is literally just a hobby, he doesn’t need it LOL)

Obsessively researches things in his free time 

Basically blind without his goggles; he’s semi colorblind, which is why the lens are tinted

Is very autistic 

Stims with his tools 

Has an average level of tolerance for pain, doesn’t like to make a big deal out of it and straight up ignores it most of the time (“I pretend I do not see it”)

Has a few scars on his hands from tinkering, but are mostly healed (lotion works wonders my dudes)

Completely introverted, please leave him alone thanks

Wrecker

Second youngest of the og four (CT 9903) 

Is constantly hungry because of his size and high metabolism 

Gets muscle aches if he goes too long without being active 

Has ADHD and autism 

Stims via working out or playing with Lula (or any of Omega’s other toys when she’s not playing with them)

Has a low level of tolerance for pain, but tries to act otherwise (and does a terrible job at it LOL)

Got his face scar on their first mission ever, doesn’t regret it and thinks it makes him look cooler 

Has various scars all over his body, as well as stretch marks from growing so big so quickly

Very extroverted, gets lonely easily

Crosshair

Youngest of the og four (CT 9904) 

Gets frequent headaches because of his superior vision (which is why getting the Order 66 headaches didn’t seem out of the ordinary to him) 

Gets sore limbs sometimes, especially his legs, from how long they are 

Is autistic 

Stims by chewing on his toothpicks 

Has an average level of tolerance for pain but is really good at hiding it

Has a few minor scars on his body but mostly stretch marks from growing so tall so quickly

Very introverted, but gets lonely at times (and will NEVER admit it)

Echo

Oldest of the entire group overall

Suffers from “ghost limbs” with his scomp arm and legs sometimes 

Will get eye twitches sometimes from his brain “short-circuiting” 

Makes jokes about his disabilities to cope (“you wouldn’t hurt a disabled man, would you?”) 

Has PTSD, mostly from what happened after the Citadel explosion 

Distracts himself from the Horrors™ by running ship diagnostics and rereading manuals (which he already liked doing, of course)

Has an average level of tolerance for pain and likes to hide it behind his jokes (“tis but a flesh wound!”)

Has some scars all over his body from the Citadel explosion and his implants

Big extrovert, HATES being alone, please don’t leave him alone OMG

[space-diablo]

I forgot I have a small picture of Sniper =3

[empresskylo]

cod men headcanons in an age gap relationship?

i have such a thing for age gaps...i blame society. also, i’m only including ghost, price, and alejandro because the other men are too young imo. ik some of their ages are debatable, so in my mind, ghost is at least 30.

Ghost

♡ honestly, i don't think my guy really gives a shit if there is an age difference between you two. like his morals are all skewed, and the last thing he'd waste time worrying about would be a *legal* age gap.

♡ being younger than him would just make his nicknames for you that much more adorable. he likes to add the words 'little' and 'tiny' in front of a lot of the things he calls you. "little mouse" "little dove" "tiny girl/boy"

♡ regardless of how much experience you have (with relationships, sex, etc) he will always act like he knows more than you. he can find himself treating you like you’re so innocent and new to everything--even if you do the same line of work as him, i.e. killing people. and it can definitely annoy you.

♡ it doesn’t matter how many people you’ve been with or how many people you’ve killed; no matter what, he knows more than you. and honestly, even tho it can annoy you sometimes, him being so dominant is just super hot.

♡ “simon, i know how to do it” you whined, as he wrapped his arms around you, showing you how to properly use a sniper. you were used to so many other guns, but not snipers. “mhm,” he mocked, stepping away from you. when you shot the gun, you missed your target by quite a few feet. your cheeks warmed and you hesitated before looking back at simon. his arms were crossed over his chest as he eyed you. you could tell he had a smug smile plastered across his face under his mask. he did not need his ego inflated any more than it already was.

Price

♡ price was definitely concerned when he first realized he had feelings for you. he knew you were of age, but that didn't stop the odd feeling he got when he was around you--like he was taking advantage of you.

♡ and his way of flirting was to act like your father… he thought he was being nice, showing you how to do stuff, always having your back. but my god was he appalled when you were frustrated with him one day after he keep hounding you about something.

♡ “Ok, dad! i get it!” “what did you just call me?” You heard the anger in his tone. shit, you were getting too comfortable around your captain, you should not have teased him like that. “S-sorry, captain. I didn’t mean—“ He cut you off, clearly agitated for a different reason than you being smart with him. “is that how you view me, doll? like a father?” if you said yes, price would know he needed to back off. he could take a hint. “No… I… You just wouldn’t get off my back. I was just trying to be funny.” You felt so embarrassed as you explained yourself. Price got into your space and grabbed your chin in his hand, titling your head up to look at him. you gulped. “you wanna call me endearments? go ahead. but don’t ever call me that again.” he looked at you a moment longer before turning away. suddenly fueled with adrenaline, you called after him. “what about daddy?” Price spun around quicker than you could register before he was pushing you backward, his hand tight in your hair as he yanked your head back to look up at him again with a gasp. “fuckin’ brat,” he muttered, a sly smile crossing his lips.

♡ as much as price truly does not care about your sexual history, he’d be lying if he said it didn’t turn him on a bit knowing how much more innocent you were than him. you could have slept with a bunch of people for all he cared, but knowing you were that much younger than him, he knew he had more experience than you regardless. and something about that sparked a flame in his chest. he had a thing for wanting to show you the ropes.. but he definitely felt guilty about thinking that way. he wouldn’t have been any less attracted to you knowing you slept with a hundred other people. he knew you being “innocent” shouldn’t turn him on. but it did…

♡ he is very possessive of you. doesn’t like the idea of other men thinking they have a chance with you. but he can get a bit self-conscious whenever a younger man approaches you or checks you out. “you really wanna be with an old man like me?” he’d ask. as confident as he is, in the beginning of your relationship, being so much older than you made him second guess himself. shouldn’t you want to be with someone your own age? “jesus, price. you’re only 37. you act like you’re knocking on hell's door.” he’d start tickling you for your bratty remark, but it definitely placated some of his nerves.

♡ and since he has more experience dating wise, he’d say “i love you” pretty early on. he’s not dating you thinking it’s some fling. he’s serious about you. and he’s lived long enough to know when he’s in love. and he’s not afraid to say it.

♡ you were saying goodbye to price as he went off on a mission. he’d only be gone a few days, but you’d hate every minute of it. he kissed you, his mustache tickling your lip. “i love you,” he murmured when he pulled away. he smirked as he appraised your stunned face. and he’d turn and leave before you had a chance to process his words, knowing you wouldn’t be able to get them out of your head the whole time he was gone.

Alejandro

♡ definitely feels bad at first, like he’s taking advantage of you. he reminds you all the time to tell him if you’re uncomfortable. that you can say no. he just doesn’t want you to feel used.

♡ as he gets more confident in the way you want him, he starts to use it against you. same as ghost, he mocks you as if you’re so innocent and inexperienced. “see, this is what they call a—“ “Yes, Ale. I know. I’m the one who showed you that.” resulting in a cheeky wink from him.

♡ during training, he embarrassed you in front of the others. when you messed up a move, he made a big deal showing you how to execute it properly even though you’ve been in the army for years now and knew how to do it in your sleep. he liked to see the way you’d get flustered with all the other guys around as he teased you.

♡ he definitely exudes a dominant side and it definitely comes out around you. he wants to do everything for you. wants to carry shit that’s too heavy for you. he wants to be your ride. the first person you call when you need help. he wants to be your everything.

♡ he also acts a little more dominant in bed than he would if he was with someone his age. something about you looking up at him with your sweet little doe-eyes sparked a dominating need within him. he takes control. he leads. he tells you what to do. he barks out commands. he punishes you for being bratty. he takes control in every sense of the word. The only time you can really hold anything over him is when he’s getting close to finishing. you’ll be able to get him to say whatever you want him to, his mind lost in a haze, wanting nothing more than to find the release you’re about to give him. “Please,” he begged. you smiled as you hovered above him. you sank back down on him and continued your motions, and he quickly climaxed. his hands squeezed your hips as he groaned. “fuckin’ perfect.”

[epicness1000]

17 REASONS WHY SAMPO KOSKI IS SUS

I'm not sure if I've come across a fictional character more horrendously sus than Sampo Koski.

Since I'm kind of hyperfixated on him (and Dr Ratio too), I will make a post on why our beloved blue scammer is very, very sus.

He is the only character to leave no trace when he walks. No splashes in water, no footprints in the snow. Literally no other character in the game does this.

All of his eidolons, save for one, are made up of two words and are very light hearted: "Rising love", "Infectious enthusiasm", "Big money!", "Huuuuuuuuge money!" and "Increased Spending", all of which reference either his love for money, or his warmth. The one exception is "The Deeper the Love, the Stronger the Hate". What? What do you mean hate? We've never seen Sampo be anything but 'haha funny scam boi'. What a strangely ominous thing to say...

Not to mention the art paired with that eidolon. In every piece of art we have of him, you can see the light in his eyes– not here. The light's completely absent.

His defeat pose. Every character is either kneeling, or sitting down. Sampo is the ONLY one who is still on his feet. This must surely be intentional.

The fact that he's among the few characters with an invalid rating from the rating pistol (Alongside Acheron, Jing Yuan, Feixiao, March 7 and Luocha, all of whom are either extremely powerful, or have a completely unknown past as is the case of March 7).

He is the only character to directly acknowledge the player in-game (Sparkle did this in a trailer, but... it was a trailer, so it doesn't count until it's something in-game). Self-aware character? (This is my own headcanon >:)

He very clearly is not a Belobogian native, this is all but confirmed by the fact that everyone states he just showed up one day a few years back (something along those lines). So... where is he really from? His splash art doesn't seem to be Belobog either...

The fact that the trailblazer turned away from him for ONE SECOND, and he disappeared without a sound??? Like he was never there at all.

The entirety of Funny Bone, which shows a very violent side to Sampo. You CANNOT convince me it doesn't hold some element of truth to who he truly is, because if Hoyo truly intended for him to be harmless comic relief with little more to him, why would they play this song live in an official Honkai: Star Rail orchestra accompanied with the visuals? Would they really approve something showing him in such a dangerous, unhinged and dark light when we've never seen him like that in-game?

The fact that he's a Masked Fool. A Masked Fool who apparently has some moral standards, but a Masked Fool nonetheless. Personally, I suspect he wasn't always so mellow.

THAT WHOLE SCENE OF FIREFLY DESCRIBING HIM, HAVING KNOWN NOTHING ABOUT WHO HE WAS, AND MAKING HIM SOUND LIKE SOME SORT OF SKILLED ASSASSIN?? (I know it was a shapeshifted Sparkle but I think the point still stands. Also, this might just be me, but before I realised it was Sampo following us around, the way FF was talking about our stalker unsettled me and genuinely left the impression that she was talking about an assassin of some kind... wouldn't surprise me if this guy's hands have been stained red in the past).

The fact that his backstory snippets are all of him just goofing around disguised as Madame Poisson? When there's CLEARLY more to him than meets the eye?

THE FACT THAT HE'S ONE OF THE FEW CHARACTERS WHO IS NOT ABLE TO BOARD THE ASTRAL EXPRESS YET????? Even Sparkle can board, so it doesn't have to do with the fact that he's a masked fool. And I think everyone else from Belobog can board, so... hmm... sus....

We find him in the Belobog outskirts. I'm pretty sure it's noted that normal humans can't go out there unprepared without freezing to death, or something? I might be misremembering.

HIS LIGHT CONE! HOW COULD I FORGET HIS LIGHT CONE! Firstly, notice it's not just one sniper targetting him, but there is also a man in the corner pointing a gun at him. The art is called "The Eyes of the Prey", yet when you read its description, Sampo is unsettlingly calm, spotting the sniper from a distance with no warning (makes him sound like he has borderline supernatural awareness, which I think fits with the idea of him being 'self-aware'), and is noted to have more money than the hitman makes from multiple contracts. I think the title is also a subversion– with how in control Sampo is of the situation, surviving TWO simultaneous hitmen, it's quite clear that he is not the prey– rather, it's those who target him.

He knows things he ABSOLUTELY SHOULD NOT KNOW. The fact that he implies that Dan Heng is a dragon? Or his 'knowledge' voice line, which clearly expresses his awareness that we arrived by train (when he should not have this information?).

His eidolon activation phrase is "Everyone has a colourful past, wouldn't you say?" We know literally NOTHING about his past.

So, I'm not sure EXACTLY what this all means, but it's clearly pointing to something. Don't let me down, Mihoyo! You usually do, you filthy gacha bastards, but... try to do Sampo justice please.

[fraux140]

König Headcanons

General, relationship, and NSFW. I hope you enjoy these! It's my first real post :)

General hcs

Had a cleft lip as a child and was part of the reason he was bullied. It was surgically repaired but there is still a scar

One of his parents is German and the other is Austrian which might explain why he has no Austrian dialect (lets pretend this is canon instead of activision just clumping all German speakers into one category lmao)

He has auburn hair but buzzes it so often that its hard to tell

LOVES Minecraft. He plays creative mode when he's trying to make masterpieces like city replicas or fantasy worlds, but loves the challenge of survival mode if he's playing with friends.

He was a total mama's boy as a kid. When his father tried to get him to 'man up' his mother was always there to protect him. Another reason he was bullied.

Chronic mansplainer but its unintentional. If you're discussing a topic he knows a lot about he will hijack the conversation and unload a bunch of info to you. He doesn't mean it maliciously.

Undiagnosed ADHD - explains why he has trouble staying still and was a bad candidate for being a sniper. But it isn't so bad that it is noticeable. He can mask it when he needs to.

Again with the ADHD thing. He hyperfixates on topics he finds interesting and even his job. Mission plan is memorised. Terrain? Memorised. Enemy info? Memorised. The ever-changing locations and nature of his job mean that he doesn't have to worry about succumbing to the boredom of monotony.

When he isn't deployed he is a beer drinker - particularly Stiegl Hell. A total beer snob as well. Any kind of American beer? Throw it away. Carling? Fosters? Sagres? Get that second rate crap away from him and prepare to be mansplained about how much better Austrian/German beer is than any other.

Has an apartment in the same neighbourhood as his parents' house so he can visit a lot when he's not deployed. His apartment is very basic and he stays there so his parents have their privacy. Their house is his home.

His mother is a seamstress and his father was a mechanic in the army. This man knows how to sew and how to keep his car healthy.

Unironically reposts alpha male quotes - not because he's a misogynist but because he genuinely believes he is the definition of an alpha male.

Teeny tiny bit of a superiority complex. Arrogant af. Stems from his size, strength, and skills. Finished Jagkdo selection second in his 'class'. It haunts him every day. Second place is the first to lose.

Is a genuinely unsettling guy. Not in a creepy way. He kind of just stands around and stares when he enters a place before deciding what to do. For example at the pub, he walks in and stares at the bar before deciding where to sit. Or if he sees somebody new, like somebody he thinks is particularly weird or someone attractive he will stare at them. It is a bit more intense than the typical 'German stare', and more off-putting because of his size.

Relationship hcs

If you're dating König, the first stages of your relationship will be spent trying to figure out how to be comfortable.

Like I said before, he is unsettling and might say something as such, coming across a bit too strong.

For example, if someone is annoying you at work he might offer to kill them. "I could hide the body no problem, schatz. Just ask." And he is very hard to read, so you can't tell if he's joking or not.

If his weirdness didn't scare you away and your relationship progresses, he unintentionally tries to manage you.

Packing a suitcase? You're doing it wrong. It's more efficient to fold the clothes like this to maximise space. Want to go for a walk? Not in those shoes. Function trumps fashion every time. Ordering at a foreign food restaurant? Let him do it for you, you're probably pronouncing it wrong. He's your passenger? You had time to pull out, liebling! Go for the overtake! Change lanes! Ffs schatzi, pull over and let him take the wheel.

Unintentionally condescending. You worked really hard on a new recipe? It's good, but he's had better at this restaurant. He recommends adding this and that...

You're complaining about how stressful your job is? Babe, you wouldn't know stress if it hit you in the face. Have YOU ever been shot at? Narrowly dodged an explosion? Being chased by enemies who are actively trying to kill you? Yeah, didn't think so...

Eventually it gets too much. You're on the verge of breaking up with him because he makes you feel like crap. He diminishes your achievements. Undermines your emotions. It's too much and being with him is making you hate yourself. And you don't deserve to feel this way.

After you tell him, he is mortified. He didn't think that his matter-of-fact way of speaking could be so mean and make you feel this way. He's so sorry, baby. Give him another chance? He'll show you how special you are to him!

After you forgive him and he agrees to change, life is much better. He gives more compliments, he listens more attentively and he tries to be more emotional instead of 'logical'. He comes to respect that you can feel a certain way about things happening in your life and doesn't have to compare it to himself.

He takes you hiking very often. So often that your legs are noticeably more toned. He buys you all of the expensive gear you need to hike in any terrain.

Sometimes sews little trinkets for you or embroiders something on your clothes - a skill he picked up from his seamstress mother.

When you tell him his alpha male quote sharing is cringe and makes him seem like an asshole, he begins to question how you see him. Don't you see how big and strong he is, baby?

When he finally gets it, he slowly starts to lose the façade. This front he puts up? It starts to come down. You want to be the big spoon? Go right ahead.

The new König loves to be doted on. Rub his belly. Run your hands through his hair/over his head if he's buzzed. Hug him. Cuddle with him on the couch. Tell him how big and strong he is - he eats it right up.

Loves working out with you. He likes showing you he's strong enough to protect you. Sit on his back while he doe push-ups. See? No problem. Look at how much weight is on this barbell! He can lift it no problem.

You told him that he can't live on ordering food from fancy restaurants every night. He needs to learn to cook. He's annoyed at first because he can afford it for both of you, but you make him learn how to cook. This time learning together in the kitchen brings you closer together. There is something beautiful about working so hard on a meal and enjoying the results together.

Sometimes he wants to surprise you when you come back from work with a new dish he'd invented. Wagyu steaks sautéed in lager and seasoned with rosemary and turmeric. It was disgusting. You couldn't find it within yourself to tell him.

NSFW hcs

When he was insecure and in his 'alpha male' stage, he was a total dom. Not that you didn't enjoy it.

Now that he's grown, he still loves fucking you in doggy or missionary or any position where he's in control. But now he'll let you ride him for as long as you want.

He LOVES laying back and watching you use his dick to get yourself off. Another reason he loves cowgirl is because he loves watching you struggle with the initial stretch of sinking onto his fat cock.

You tried to convince him to let you peg him once. He outright refused. Maybe he wasn't there yet.

Call him dirty all you want, he loves fucking you after you have worked out together. And you don't mind it either. Seeing him all hot and bothered and out of breath is a huge turn on for you.

Can be aggressive. He likes biting you but not to the point it draws blood.

Sends absolutely horrendous nudes when you're in public with no warning when he's deployed. You'll get a whatsapp notification and you open it to see a picture of his raging hard on while you're at work.

He gets creative with the angles. He tries different lighting. In a strange way you found it very romantic. His captions are atrocious though. 'He misses you', 'I wish I could shoot my sperms into you instead of bullets into my enemies', 'My cock is harder than my job'. They are honestly so fucking weird. But you have grown to love his weird little quips.

Likes roleplay. He likes to be a policeman while you're a petty thief. He's a burglar and he'll leave you alone if you give him something else.

Loves overpowering you. Sometimes when he's fresh home from deployment he will drive you two to the woods at night. He will give you a head start and then hunt you down like a predator. He was in the jagdkommando, darling, didn't you know that means 'Hunting commando'?

When he catches you, the adrenaline gets to the both of you and you fuck like wild animals. Biting, scratching, howling and begging. He always cums inside of you on nights like these, breeding you like a true animal

When you get home and after you've showered (he washes your back for you and kisses along the nape of your neck), he's showering you with kisses and cuddles while you settle into bed and watch something together on TV.

[lubrumalis]

konig headcanons! (realistic)

tw: nsfw

all of these are realistic hc! dont expect a normal konig

hes NOT a shy awkward pushover, just because he has social anxiety??? we can see through his voice lines hes a very cocky person and speaks rather agressively

“lets be honest, its better off in my hands.”

i hc that just because konig has social anxiety, he doesn’t express this through bring soft and shy, he expresses it through his bluntness

konig wanted to be a sniper but did not because he couldn’t stand still, has social anxiety, i hc he has some form of adhd

his very cocky and blunt shouting isn’t because hes mean, but he just doesnt wanna be seen as that bullied kid he once was

hes doesnt have horrible EQ, but the kind of guy to be incredibly unfiltered

also, this guy was literally assigned as a human battering ram, you think hes all soft and sweet???😅😅😅

no he won’t get angry or cry if his mask is taken off. just annoyed.

its not actually canon that konig is a colonel (correct me if im wrong, i couldnt find anything on the official wiki) but lets assume hes one anyway

even if he isnt, gets paid well. really well.

private military companies that deploy soldiers in areas of active conflict can pay up to hundreds of thousands for one soldier

considering konigs age (late 30s at least) and skills, probably 400-500k a year.

chose to join the military because he had an obsession with tanks and guns as a kid

a lot of hc’s say hes 6’10. i disagree, simply based off of chances and the fact thats wayyyy too tall for the military

but he was described as a mountain, so id say his height is around 6’5-6’8

very very intimidating. hes tall big and has the mask of an executioner in the 15th century. who wouldn’t be scared?

definitely will say some random german word in a situation where no one else there knows german. he doesn’t give a damn lol

hates americans (thinks theyre all obese, mannerless, and bad at geography)

brings up the most random topics. again i really think konig has adhd.

konig was not good at school and hated it, mainly due to the anxiety and how he couldn’t pay attention

also why he chose the path of a soldier

drinks lots of beer, high alcohol tolerance, this guys a true european.

loves austrian or german food. loves schnitzel and pies.

konigs breakfast is literally sausages, toast, eggs, and sometimes beer

BIG APPETITE. he could eat for 3 people.

a little insecure about his appearance, not confident in his looks :( also why he hid his face

but as he grew older he uses the mask for actual purposes of concealing his identity, he is a special ops soldier after all

kind of a cheapskate. he chose to hide his face with what, polyester? chose a piece of cloth over everything else.

has very conservative beliefs. not to the point where he hates abortion and votes far right, konig is just a little confused about some things certain liberals believe in

pretty political person lmao

not enough info to conclude whether or not konig was abused as a kid tbh

he was definitely miserable for a period in his life. hes in the military living a monotone life, barely any contact with others, and constantly living in fear he’d die

i dont think hes as traumatized as ghost tho🙂🙂

konig appreciates his dna and how it makes him big and tall, but sometimes gets incredibly annoyed at it

mainly because well, he got bullied for itas a kid

because he specializes in hostage rescue a lot of hostages (especially kids) are scared of him and refuse to leave the area with him

takes a lot of convincing 🥲🥲

has a lot of intrusive thoughts

cannot use social media properly

also texts like an old grandpa. uses 😂 and 🤣 unironically.

“Can we have burgers 🍔 tonight🌃?”

probably uses a blackberry or reallyyyyy old iphone

relationship hcs:

konigs voice actor (jim boeven) stated in a livestream that konigs wife would ideally be a mix between maria pedraza (actress) and rachael from blade runner (character from movie).

both are 170cm ish and brunettes

i can actually see that—konig is massive and he probably prefers someone on the tall side

first thing you did that led to your relationship with him? you tolerated him that is. listened to him ranting😃

i can see him with a civilian or someone whos in the military tbh

finds you pretty at first

enjoys bickering, he needs someone to simulate his mind

you know those stories where his s/o is 5’2, clingy, soft af, and neeeeeeeds konig? haha you won’t be getting that from me.

unlike ghost, who really takes his time to get to know someone and opens up slowly, scared to have his trust broken again

konig charges in like the human battering ram he is😁

if he has a feeling you’re trustworthy you are trustworthy.

horrible at flirting. he doesn’t know how to talk to women smoothly

needs someone equally as weird and funny

s/o needs to be someone with very firm boundaries and can stand their ground, i think konigs a really stubborn person, so for a healthy relationship to work, s/o can’t be the generic bimbo

konig wears the pants in the relationship

doesn’t let you pay. he has a enough money and believes men should always pay

(im sorry to break your delusions) konig does not strike to me as someone who likes a docile homebody. thats ghost (if you remove the word docile).

he doesn’t like extremely dominant partners either

imagine someone who is a listener, accepting yet blunt, shares his quirks, and has a very elegant feel to them

also someone very independent

also gonna get killed for this but konig would realistically not go for a girl in her early twenties. he prefers elegance and sophistication over being cute and jumpy

hates one night stands.

values relationships more than you think. he can come off as strong at first, but hes trying his best

ecstatic when you tell him you wanna learn german (hes not a good teacher)

doesn’t like play fighting, he thinks he’s gonna accidentally hurt you

admires you a lot. he knows hes not the best looking person and doesn’t understand the makeup skincare dress up thing.

isn’t paranoid, but definitely doesn’t say he has an s/o

if you ever get mad at him, konig will tighten all jars in the kitchen so you have to ask him for help :)

extremely unfiltered. he hates your cooking? he will say it. that dress looks better than the other? he will say it.

[scozthewoz]

merc sleeping headcanons

actually these are canon i watch them sleep

spy ▪︎ does not snore. or make any noise whatsoever. or move. he looks like a corpse when he sleeps aside from the very very subtle rise and fall of his chest. and he cannot fall asleep unless he's wrapped in 4,000 dollar silk sheets. he's also a very light sleeper and shoots up everytime the base groans or creaks.

scout ▪︎ snores suprisingly disruptively! still being obnoxious even in the clutches of slumber! he also fidgets like crazy, tosses and turns, and twists into the most ridiculous positions. he wakes up half-hanging off the bed with his blankets scattered on the floor most days.

medic ▪︎ also sleeps very corpse-like, but his breathing is more audible. he does NOT like going to bed and very frequently passes out on his desk. definitely has terrible insomnia he refuses to treat or acknowledge.

engineer ▪︎ also a workbench passer-outer, but instead of insomnia he's just the worst workaholic ever. and he snores like crazy. he'll usually wake up and just get right back to what he was working on like nothing happened.

soldier ▪︎ an incredibly active sleeper like scout. he's usually bear hugging something throughout the night whether it be zhanna, a pillow, or a giant teddy bear pyro gifted. death grip. you cannot escape it. he snores AND drools. bro sleeps like a dog having a bad dream

pyro ▪︎ nobody sees this thing sleep. the rare times it's witnessed, she's all curled up like a cat on the floor of her room with a stuffed animal. its unsure if they're actually sleeping however, because they do it so lightly that they immediately wake up if someone even glances at them, and the mask obviously obscures their face.

heavy ▪︎ sleeps like a fucking log, on his back, completely motionless. you can't wake this guy up. he'd sleep through a nuclear disaster. he has a snore that shakes the walls. he also has a very extensive nightly routine which involves checking on medic and taking him to bed if needed.

sniper ▪︎ his back is all messed up because he falls alseep just about anywhere. he can be in the most uncomfortable position you've ever seen just having a little cat nap. he's a very light sleeper though, so he wakes just as easily as he dozes off. his sleep schedule is so fucked he's surviving on coffee and willpower.

demo ▪︎ he also has a habit of passing out in random locations, usually from drunkenness. the other mercs find him in all kinds of wacky fucking places around the base just honk mimimi-ing away and have to drag him to his room. even when he's sober that day, he does rely on alcohol to go to sleep. it's not healthy.

[demoman-kisser420]

Cuddling headcanons for the mercs <3

(All nine❤️)

Medic

This man loves to hold you istg he will just hold you to his chest and play with your hair as yall fall asleep

Sniper

Definitely a spooning guy if yall are sleeping in his van there's limited space and he's just adapted to sleeping on his side

Heavy

This man LOVES holding you like you will sleep on him he wraps his arms around you and reads as you fall asleep on him

Demoman

This man Definitely will just rest his head on your chest as he falls asleep he likes when you pet him slighty

Soldier

Definitely like demoman but also likes to protect you so he likes it either way he won't fall asleep before you at all like his brain won't let him

Engineer

Loves spooning and he will rub your thighs or back before you guys go to sleep also wouldn't be apposed to sleeping in between you thighs

Pyro

They love to hold you as you sleep like they won't let go at all the mask comes off during sleep they like when you trace there burn scars (I'm going off the unofficial pyro face by valve)

Scout

This man loves you laying on his chest it makes him feel confident that he can protect you he will play with your hair till you fall asleep

Spy

He's a romantic guy so really he wants you to lay on his chest but he also like spooning he's always gonna be the big spoon btw he wispers French as yall fall asleep

(I think I'm getting better but If you spot some spelling mistakes I'm sorry)

[prettyboypistol]

How the TF2 Mercs Kiss! || TF2 x GN!Reader Headcanons

Scout

VERY eager, but VERY inexperienced. Spends more time hyping himself up by bragging to you about how he's totally made out with so many girls before.

Surprisingly shy at first, heartwarmingly innocent and wholesome in the beginning. Chaste and fluttering kisses that help him gain confidence.

If you seem receptive to him, Jeremy gets a lot more bold and experimental. Yeah, he's never kissed anyone with tongue before but that ain't stopping him now.

Overall, he's adorably innocent. Playfully tease him while you show him the right way to kiss.

Soldier

Surprisingly amazing kisser and I will die on this hill. God tier SSS+ Class kisses every time.

Have you ever felt an all-consuming passion in one kiss? A man's entire feelings and being as you lock lips?

Master of subtle touches, there is no "just kissing" with Jane. His hands sneak to cup your face, a hand on your waist that pulls you ever so close to him.

This mf will give you the best make out session of your life and nobody will ever believe that you actually love SOLDIER. MISTER ROCKET JUMP HIMSELF.

Pyro

Pyro kisses more with their hands and with little rubs with their cheeks on your skin.

Has a huuuuuge thing for you kissing/taking their fingers into your mouth, and they find it just as affectionate and intimate as kissing. They like being able to see you fully, rather than feeling your lips on thier mask and vaguely seeing you.

They feel more of a grounding connection when they see you, holding them by the hand. It's like you can't be affected by their hallucinations when you are so close to them.

If you are blindfolded and like, DEEP committed into the relationship, you MIGHT feel cracked and warm lips against yours. It's loving and perfect, but weird. You much prefer the Pyro you know they're comfortable with, rather than forcing them to conform to the standard around you two.

Engineer

God, he kisses like warm chocolate. Languid, lovely, and fucking addictive.

Always a tad romantic to it, he'd never platonically kiss you on the mouth. Murmurs out a little "c'mere hun" or "there's my love." before every kiss.

HAND. HOLDING. This man cannot help how his fingers intertwined with yours as you kiss- even just a quick kiss! He tries to sneak hold your hand!

No matter the context, scenario, or pretense, as soon as you pull away he gives you this sappy ass lovestruck smile. Goofy half smile full of affection. The amount of LOVE in this mans EXPRESSION-

Demoman

Probably the most fun to kiss out of all the mercs. He's got an air of casualty about him that makes you feel comfortable- be it platonic or romantic.

His lips are always ever so slightly chapped due to the alcohol on his mouth, but his kisses are full and comsuming of all your senses.

Tavish and you just kinda view kissing as another form of affection between you two, just like cuddling or quality time. You taste more alcohol than him sometimes, but the little giggling hum that Tavish unconsciously lets out when he's content tells you all you need to know about how much he likes you.

Likes to kiss you randomly. Oh, gave him a cup of coffee? kiss. Passed by him in a match? kiss for good luck. Changed the channel on the TV? you seemed bored, kiss kiss kiss.

Heavy

This man kisses like the world will end tomorrow. Every single time. It's always heartfelt and possessive and like he put all his feelings into the kiss.

Minikisses are his favorite. After a long and devoted kiss, he breaks the gesture, only to kiss you briefly again, then again, and again.

Usually the minikisses travel around your face and neck as his hands wrap around your back and waist.

He wants to surround you- to drown you in love. He wants to make you feel safe and protected with every act of intimacy.

Sniper

This man is a coin flip between tender, earnest kisses and wildly possessive kisses.

Gentle handholds and private smiles meant only for you OR pinning you against the nearest surface with a bold grasping on your face as he claims you more than you could ever realize.

He loves claiming you in both ways. He likes when you give yourself to him as a gift and, in turn, offering himself to you. But that prey drive in him loves to chase you too.

Mutters between kisses about how much he needs you to live.

Spy

Knows exactly how to push all the right buttons with you. He puts his hands and caresses you in all the right spots.

Every kiss is deliberate, means something, and has the intention of making you wrap around his finger for him to completely his.

His kisses are languid and drawn out, as if he is that too-expensive alcohol he adores so much. Wave after wave of pleasurable class oozes from him as he dizzies you deeper into his web of affection.

This man is able to make you infatuated with a single kiss and he absolutely loves how he can make you sigh in exhiliration.

Medic

Imma be real with you chief, he's the worse kisser out of the bunch, but the passion is outmatched. This man is ruled by the tip of his tongue and the zipper of his pants when he's around you.

He's rough and overpowering, the need to drown you in pleasure flips in him like a fucking lightswitch. Hands all over you, wherever he can grab at.

Honestly? He'd be fine if you two weren't more intimate and only kissed, he'd be fine with that. He'd love to just spend hours making out with you.

Uses kisses to distract you when he needs to do blood tests on you or general needlework.

[aethelwyneleigh27]

Cod Characters General Dating Headcanons (part three)

+ Random and Some bits of Chubby Fem S/O Headcanons with mentions of different nationality S/O

+ What type of BF/GF they would be

Including König, Kim "Horangi" Hong-jin, Keegan P. Russ, Philip Graves (+ some headcanons including the Shadows), Makarov

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Fem terms and pronouns like she/her are used for the reader

ꕥ HOPE YOU ENJOY! ꕥ

My rules for requests and characters I can write for

A/n: I tried so hard to get this one out in time with the other but my other wips are getting to me 😭. I posted twice today just to feed y'all ahaha.

Disclaimers/warnings: Typical Cod things, OOC characters???, Unrealistic, Some suggestive themes and language, I'm so sorry but English is not my first language so please don't come after me. Most of the content I've seen are on TikTok and Tumblr I don't actually play the game but I love the characters so much, same with any other content I have for other video games.

Tiny sidenote: the reader in this has been describe to be shorter than the characters and has been mentioned to have a soft body rather than the muscular type.

König

ꕥ (PLEASE DON'T COME AFTER ME, I DON'T KNOW ANY GERMAN AND I'M USING GOOGLE TRANSLATE)

ꕥ Speaking of König, I don't think this man is the shy boy that some people is making him out to be (not that he doesn't have that side at all, I just feel like they make it his whole personality). Based on voice lines alone this man is cocky asf.

ꕥ There's a reason for his mask, yes he was bullied as a child because of his looks and that's one of the causes to his social anxiety but that doesn't mean this mf is shy. He just like to avoid people and social interactions yk. (Y'all have no idea how much I can relate to this)

ꕥ Has and will continue to use his height to his advantage, someone bothering you while you're both sat having a wonderful time together? This mf stands the fuck up, shoulders back, chest out and everything. Looming over that person while glaring down, arms crossed while they're engulfed by the shadow of this 6'10 behemoth of a man.

ꕥ Chubby!Reader? He'll throw you over his shoulders, only using one arm below your ass while he carries you off. Seriously it is no problem to this man, he'd beg you to sit on his face and suffocate him. If anything I'd say he has a preference for it yk, very soft and plush reader for real.

ꕥ Our DIY king here wearing a shirt for a hood, his hair sticking out of the hole for the head whenever he's dressing casual. Play with his hair like right now, you'll make him melt right then and there.

ꕥ Enjoys cuddling, hasn't had many partners and by that I mean kinda none. Nobody was insane enough to approach him till you came around so he's very touch starved. He didn't even know he enjoyed touching that much till he was able to feel the amount of warmth your body gives him. He'd swear on his life that he was intoxicated in that moment.

ꕥ Whenever you sit or straddle on his lap, he's still so fucking tall. I swear you will gain neck pains if you wanna keep eye contact while talking to him. (I understand the struggle, I am a 5'1 girly. Every character I know within the CoD universe is taller than me 😭)

ꕥ Doesn't actually wear his mask around you, he's comfortable and trust you enough to know you wouldn't go around telling everyone what he looks like.

ꕥ Nicknames he'd call you in German are Mein Schatz, Fräulein, Liebling, Engel and Kleine Maus

ꕥ He's still definitely bitter about not being a sniper. (AHAHAHA)

Kim "Horangi" Hong-jin

ꕥ (IF I'M BEING HONEST, I DID NOT EXPECT HIS VOICE TO BE THAT DEEP. ALSO HIS VOICE LINES IN KOREAN/HANGUL (IDK WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT)

ꕥ He has doodles on his tactical gear that he did himself (there are also one that are a tribute to squid game because man's had a gambling addiction), has asked you to draw on it too and he proudly wears it when on duty. Will feel stupid while unconsciously smiling if you draw a heart.

ꕥ Writing something down on his vest from your own mother tongue and he's asking the meaning, if it's genuinely something good like a compliment or something like "I love you" then you will catch this man with a shit eating grin.

ꕥ He used to be a gambler before entering the military and it eventually got him to stop, though he still has a thing for risk, he got himself a more deadlier alternative.

ꕥ Expect surprise back hugs, this man isn't called Horangi for nothing. He's stealthy, I like to think that whatever he says to you is well thought out as well. Man knows how to think before he speaks.

ꕥ Horangi likes to pounce on things, just for the fun of it. It leads him to tackle you on your shared bed a lot, lots of play fighting too.

ꕥ HAS THE PRETTIEST EYES EVER. Like seriously, the only people who knows what he looks like is you and König. Had gentle eyes, you know that quote "His eyes softened", yeah that's the definition of his eyes.

ꕥ Loves it when you trace the veins on his arms with your finger nails, will just straight up offer his arm to you.

Keegan P. Russ

ꕥ This man and his panty dropping voice like holy hell I have never heard a voice as deep as his without a vocal fry (from those try hard guys on TikTok who try to hard thinking their thirst traps are good).

ꕥ Calls you "kid" in an affectionate way? It's honestly just what he calls anyone younger than him, you're shorter? He'll emphasize on that shit. Elaborating on the nickname I said earlier, he uses it less when y'all are dating but still does on some occasions.

ꕥ Would say the most dirty and uncalled for things, whispering it in your ears. He's and asshole in the best way possible, loves it when you gasp and playfully slap his chest.

ꕥ He's sweet though, would see you as his wife even if you're not married. You're his now, the moment you entered his life, he basically had a death grip on you.

ꕥ Something tells me that he likes talking about you or to you through radios yk. His voice sounding even deeper through the device, calling you doll even though he's supposed to refer to you with your call sign.

ꕥ Praise kink? I mean you've more likely heard his voice lines, is the type of man to praise you and ruffle your hair, either that or he'll kiss you depending on what stage of your relationship you are both in.

ꕥ Constantly thinks his eyes are weird even though they aren't, he just has sleepy eyes. Speaking of sleeping, I feel like he has such a fucked up sleeping schedule and is used to pulling all nighters more than the normal person.

ꕥ Will drag you in bed though and lay his whole weight on top of you because you ain't going nowhere, you are staying there with him and only him.

Philip Graves

ꕥ (If it isn't "Fix It Felix", please tell me I'm not the only one who sees it AHAHAHA)

ꕥ Philip is touchy, somebody for the love of everything that is holy cuddle this man please. He is just screaming at any type of physical contact at this point. (My sources? Right fucking here)

ꕥ Is the type of boyfriend to come home to you and just hug you, y'all would be there for a solid 10 minutes before he lets you go. Burying his head into your neck and just inhaling your scent while having his arms wrapped tightly around you.

ꕥ His Shadows? More like his fucking children, again going back to the TikTok. He knows how to get their attention, the little pats on the shoulder and small praises are his way of saying they did a good job and they're eating it up.

ꕥ That being said, you are either gonna be their mother figure or someone they enjoy protecting because their dad is so fond of you. Why not be both right?

ꕥ You cannot tell me this man won't be next to the grill, spatula, tongs or whatever kitchen utensil in one hand and a cold bottle of beer in the other.

ꕥ Spends his weekends with you on his lap while he watches football in your guys' couch, you're definitely scrolling on your phone during this.

ꕥ You cannot tell me this man doesn't wear cowboy hats and boots because he certainly does, is it a turn on or a turn off? I genuinely do not know..

ꕥ Is fruity on some aspects but would never fucking admit it..

Makarov

ꕥ Y'ALL ACTUALLY THOUGHT I'D WRITE FOR THIS MAN? NAH THIS ACC IS WHOLESOME (OR ANGSTY) AND ION THINK THIS MAN IS SALVAGEABLE. (This came from a girl who once was obsessed with Tom Riddle for years when she was 13, I recovered from it dw)

ꕥ This man would literally use anyone and anything as leverage for whatever he wants to achieve. (Yes I am one of those "I can fix him" people but damn idk if this man is fixable)

ꕥ Please don't tell me you actually genuinely think this man would be good to you.. I knew what I was writing was unrealistic but damn y'all are delulu on another level (so am I, stay delulu). Jokes aside I love y'all and he's one of the few I won't write for. (AHEM Severus Snape (that greasy mop haired mf)

ꕥ And yes I understand most of my shit are kind of OOC but damn if I wrote him, it would be extremely fucking far from canon and I don't like romanticizing toxic relationships (if I ever do write it, it will be angst and I can't ever promise a happy ending).

ꕥ Happy April fool's! (I know I'm posting this end of September (it's actually October now 😭)

[jar-of-something-else]

sleeping w/ the mercs [IT IS LIKE THAT]

these are so badddddd bro literally ignore this i just need practice and the mercs are my victims pinky promise i'll get better

yeah the title is the exact same as the tf2 headcanons from my main SO WHAT

if ur under 18 please don't interact 👍🏻

afab reader i’m sorry guys :( gender is totally neutral though

obviously this is under a cut

warnings/includes: MENTIONS OF SYRINGES/NEEDLES, SCALPELS, AND MEDICAL STUFF IN MEDIC'S SECTION!!!!!! AND KNIVES AND BLOOD IN SNIPER'S!!!! these are so bad, pyro is insane, medic is also insane, sniper is depraved, actually everybody's depraved, i'm depraved and also so so sorry

mostly what they're into/how they behave, nothing super reader specific in these ones

Scout:

-he’s got enough experience but he isn’t as good as he says he is, he’s got the spirit though and that’s what matters

-really good with his fingers but he can't find the clit half the time so help him out a bit

-absolutely an ass man but isn’t into anal

-scout usually likes positions where he can easily see/touch your ass (doggy, reverse cowgirl, etc)

-definitely says cringe shit in the bedroom, 100% refers to himself as daddy (which is canon i think?? i remember him having a voice line where he does that, could be wrong tho)

-has tried (and failed) to call you kitten on the regular but reverted back to the usual (still cringy) nicknames he calls you after demo made fun of him

-he never shuts up so the dirty talk is CRAZYYYY

-calls you stuff like doll, baby, babe, and uses pretty girl/boy/baby and babygirl/boy/doll when he's close

-even though he’s a little clumsy with it, he really does like giving oral, just give him a little direction; BUT likes receiving oral even more, sorry abt ur knees babe 💔

-definitely into semi-public sex, he won’t do anything in front of people but you bet your ass he’s finding some alleyway or storage closet to get freaky in

-does get jealous pretty easy and even though he’s usually not too rough with you he is not above manhandling when he sees fit

-the dog tags stay on, do with that what you will

Soldier:

-good GAWD

-literally so mean but mean in a hot way so that makes it okay

-absolutely nickname crazy; most of them aren't very cute or sexy (i.e. cadet, maggot, etc) but cupcake always makes an appearance

-very much into verbal degradation because of course he is, is also very into manhandling and just kinda tossing you around but he doesn't wanna hurt you too bad

-rarely ever fucks on an actual bed, usually it's the nearest wall/table/chair/couch, any surface you could lay/sit on really

-no the helmet is not coming off but that adds to it

-the honey IS going on though, maybe not his full body but it will make an appearance (he’s def into foodplay)

-tiny bit of a size kink, i think soldier is one of the taller, bulkier mercs so there's a very good chance he's much bigger than you in one way or another

-would absolutely be interested in a threesome with demo let's get real here

-very attracted to body hair bc i say so

-likes positions where he's very obviously the one in control/with the power; very into restraint either with some device (handcuffs, rope, etc) or with his own hands

-VERY loud, so good luck with that lmao

Pyro:

-man,,,,

-obviously into temperature and wax play

-the mask and suit do not come off, but pyro has a plethora of toys to use on you instead 😊

-gets off on the idea that he's some faceless person you can't really understand that has complete control over you and your body

-does occasionally lift the mask up just above his nostrils to kiss you, though, scarred lips be damned

-does babble a lot, even though it's all muffled; the nicknames he uses are surprisingly cute, he'll call you stuff like sugarplum, marshmallow, firefly, sugar cube, and other sickly-sweet names

-doesn't like showing you his bare skin/body because of their burn scars, but pyro does enjoy grinding if you wanna help him out that bad

-derives most of his pleasure from making you feel good, though, so he isn't really looking for any type of physical release on his end

-pyro's are kinda short i just can't think of any more rn i apologize 💔

Demo:

-WHAT A MAN 😍😍😍

-#1 lover out of all the mercs get fucked spy

-i think his build is very similar to soldiers, maybe an inch or two taller, so he definitely has the same lowkey size kink

-is also open to a threesome with soldier

-absolutely a service dom but he teases so much

-FAKE SYMPATHY!!!! FAKE SYMPATHY!!!!!!!

-likes when you call him by his name more than any of the cheesy titles dudes usually want their significant other to call them but he is always referring to you by any nickname he can think of; the most popular ones are lamb, sweetheart, lass/lad, my girl/boy/baby and "poor, sweet thing"

-loves talking to you and making you talk back to him even when you're literally on a different planet; makes you tell him what you want him to do even though he knows exactly what you're gonna say

-also slightly into dumbification (not to the extent medic or engineer are, though, he just thinks it's hot)

-very much into face and thigh riding

-foreplay alone could last as long as an hour if he's feeling "mean" at that particular time

-THIGH MAN!!!!!! LET'S GO!!!!!!!!!!

-makes you hold eye contact with him, sometimes the eyepatch comes off 🥴

-likes giving a whole lot more than receiving but he isn't about to turn down a blowjob if you offer

-waking you up with oral, it's his version of breakfast in bed

Heavy:

-and you thought demo was a service dom 🙄

-literally will do whatever you ask him to he does not care, as long as you feel good he's content

-very obvious size kink and it's very easy to exploit, but heavy doesn't take too kindly to teasing (he isn't about to stop you, though)

-speaks mostly in russian so unless you're fluent you can't really understand him but you get the gist of what he's saying by the tone in his voice

-outside of whatever russian bullshit he's spouting out, he calls you his "leetle bunny"

-tries to be gentle with you because of how big he is, but if he's provoked he can and will get wild

-as stated above, he can and will get wild, which includes his dirty talk; russian praise will turn into demeaning english muttered in your ear

-BREEDING KINK !!!!!!!!!!

-doesn't tease you on purpose, but he goes slow enough to where you think he's fucking with you (no pun intended)

-begging is never necessary but it is a guilty pleasure of his

-doesn't ask to receive oral often but watching you struggle with it does kinda turn him on even more

-face sitting extraordinaire, yes he does make the stupid eating sounds like in the game and yes he does it on purpose to try to make you laugh

-LET HEAVY FUCK NASTY GOD DAMN IT!!!

Engineer:

-WHAT A MIGHTY GOOD MAN 😍😍😍

-much stronger than you'd think he is and he does use that to his advantage

-slight temperature play when the gunslinger is involved, it's just a little colder than room temperature but it's a very stark contrast

-loves conflicting his speech with his actions; he'll sweet talk and praise you while he's railing you into next week

-speaking of, he'll call you anything but your name. honeybee, honey, darlin', sweet girl/boy/baby, baby girl/boy/doll, any nickname that sounds hot in a southern accent he's callin you

-he absolutely has a daddy kink but won't tell you unless you have one too and approach him first, chances are you're younger than he is and he doesn't wanna make you think he's a weirdo

-all in all, the dirty talk is INSANEEEEEEEE

-absolutely into dumbification, he knows he's smart and he gets off on the power imbalance when you're babbling about nothing and he's still perfectly present

-also slightly into dacryphilia? it's not attractive when you're crying from pain, sadness, frustration, etc but he likes making you feel so good you're overwhelmed and all you can do is cry for him

-might forget to take the helmet and goggles off, but if you want him to keep them on then by all means he will

-would absolutely abide by the cowboy hat rule (if you don't know what that is, basically if a cowboy puts his hat on your head y'all are fuckin' later on)

-very much into bigger people, the extra chub around the thighs, chest, cheek, and stomach areas are a weakness of his

MEDIC!

-the moment we've all been waiting for

-kinda like soldier in the fact that he's mean in a hot way, but it's less bully-mean and more absolutely deranged mean

-of course he's into degradation and medical play, definitely dacryphilia and dumbification (for similar reasons engineer is), another merc with a slight size kink cause medic is big as hell

-likes to get you on the operation table and trace a syringe or scalpel (or both if he's feeling patient [haha get it]) along your body purely for the fear it evokes from you

-wants to get you scared/vulnerable and that's how he starts his foreplay; totally into the whole predator/prey thing but not in the same way sniper is, medic is more into metaphorical or psychological hunting rather than the actual thing

-FAKE SYMPATHY!!!!!! FAKE SYMPATHY!!!!! FAKE SYMPATHY!!!

-teases, edges, and overstimulates you to the point of tears and gets this stupid smug look on his face while cooing at you

-calls you demeaning names, like pet, but he's got some cute ones he uses too; täubchen, maus, schatz, and liebling (dove, mouse, sweetheart, and darling) are very prevalent in and outside of the bedroom

-if you're okay with it, medic does like to use you as a bit of stress relief when everybody else is getting on his nerves

-is 100% down for a doctor/nurse or doctor/patient roleplay let's get real here

-also into semi-public sex, sometimes he'll leave the medbay door unlocked and slightly ajar purpose just to mess with you

-though he is very rough with you most of the time, he likes to save his more tender moments for when the two of you are in an actual bedroom and not his workspace

Sniper:

-wild. like genuinely doesn't know what to do with himself when he's horny he just goes fucking crazy.

-even though he gets crazy insane, he doesn’t really know what all to do and it frustrates him; he doesn't have much experience when it comes to sexual acts with another person involved so please give him some pointers

-absolutely into knife play come on

-if you have a period, he'd also be down for period sex he does not care about blood in the slightest

-isn't all that nickname-heavy like some of the other mercs here, but he does sprinkle them into his dirty talk. it's usually the same things he calls you outside of the bedroom, like 'roo, darl', and love

-into body worship, giving or receiving. he likes making you feel beautiful and he likes feeling good about himself too

-would definitely want you to suck him off while he does target practice and i know this is such a popular headcanon but come on guys

-another popular headcanon is sniper being into predator/prey dynamics which like,,,come on. it's literally perfect. you're telling me this nutcase dude wouldn't be into scaring the shit out of you by physically hunting you down. it's basically canon idc

-likes biting and leaving marks on your neck/shoulders in very visible areas because he's kind of a possessive guy ngl

-as much as he likes people seeing the aftermath of what he does to you, sniper is a very private person so he really wouldn't be all that into sneaky sex. the closest you'll get is his sniper nest while he does target practice on cease-fire days

Spy:

-despite being an asshole on the regular, he's a very attentive lover

-into body worship but only giving, he already knows he's fine and he wants to make sure you're never insecure about yourself

-bilingual babe 😍 speaks in french so much you can't really understand what he's talking about but he's more than happy to give you a translation

-also has a daddy kink let's get real here

-KNIFE PLAY!!!!!!!!!!

-heavily into power play as well, similar to pyro because he'll keep his clothes (including the mask and gloves) on while you're completely bare to him

-likes buying you lingerie

-likes getting and giving head the same amount, he has no real preference cause it's gonna end in sex every time anyway 🤷‍♀️

-french nicknames ONLY!!!! mon cher (my dear), ma chérie/mon chéri (my darling), amour/mon amour (love/my love), gentille fille/garçon/bébé (sweet girl/boy/baby), mon ange (my angel) [currently using my basic understanding of the french language for evil]

-semi-public and public sex spy does not give a fuck he has a cloaking device for a reason 🙄🙄

-if you don't already have one he will give you an accent kink

[machveil]

I like writing König because he’s an open ended character. we’re given good information about him, but only so much - that leaves a lot of interpretation for fans

on duty as a Colonel? cocky, confident, proud of himself and his accomplishments - a prior insertion specialist and currently a sniper? he’s earned the right to have pride in what he does

with people he’s comfortable with? he can be open about his interests, not that he’ll start the conversation - he’s still reserved. but he’s confident when he talks about things he knows about, he can be a little shit with them and isn’t afraid to mess around with someone

interacting with people he doesn’t know? he’ll try not to - despite how he behaves on duty, off duty König is a mess. he’s too big, he’s too awkward, he’s too much. he’ll stand up for himself, he won’t take shit, but he fumbles with his words when ordering at a drive through or talking to a cashier

from what we know of his childhood and his early days when he enlisted, he’s seen as too much, someone that sticks out. too big to be friends with as a child, too quiet to interact with, too tall to be a sniper, etc

if König doesn’t know you personally yet? he’ll still have that nervous energy. he doesn’t want to freak you out, he’s a lot of man - masked man at that. even if you don’t mind, he knows how intimidating he can be

if König knows you he’ll open up more, less afraid to talk too much, take up too much room. he’ll voice his opinions and try to relate to you. he’ll poke at you - I think he grew up as the family baby, he’s had practice annoying his siblings

if König loves you? even though he can be annoying and odd, he cherishes you. you’ll catch him with his hood purposely off - still self-conscious about his appearance, but he trusts you. he’ll talk about his interests openly, returning the favor by listening to you. a little less reserved when it’s just the two of you, a little louder, a little more okay being himself

he’s open ended, and I will headcanon him in these regards<3

[barefoothighlander]

call of duty masterlist

-my requests are open if you have any asks!

-this blog is 18+, mdni, if i notice you’re an underage or ageless blog i will block you

-all posts will have individual warnings, smut indicated with a *

-taglist form

simon ‘ghost’ riley

absolution (18+) masterlist

summary: you're a sniper and hostage negotiations specialist in the military, secretly married to Simon, as the knowledge of your relationship would compromise both your posts. one night he comes home from a mission and you tell him that Price wants you on the team for an upcoming 141 mission.

spillways (18+) masterlist

summary: you joined the 141 a year ago, your file is completely redacted and no one knows anything about you, other than your code name, ‘phoenix’. you keep to yourself but have caught the eye of ghost, who seems intrigued by your presence and is determined to find out who you are behind the mask you put up.

mary on a cross (18+) masterlist

summary: you've recently moved to manchester, while looking for jobs you come across a run-down pub looking for bartenders. upon meeting its owner simon, you find out there's more to him than meets the eye. mercenary/vigilante au

the vow (18+) masterlist

summary: you’re betrothed to the future king of Guilder and a fearsome knight is assigned to protect you. medieval au

mini series

never going back again (18+) masterlist

summary: ghost finds himself at the wrong safe house, injured and unable to call for backup

cards on the table (18+) + soap

summary: ghost and soap place a bet on who can sleep with you first

septem peccata mortalia (18+) masterlist

summary: a collection of oneshots based on the seven deadly sins

pick and go (18+) masterlist

summary: you work as an athletic trainer for the manchester rugby team and accidentally sleep with one of their players rugby au

call me little sunshine (18+) masterlist

summary: you come home for summer break to find a new man has moved in next door, he’s charming and mysterious so you welcome him to the neighbourhood. dark themes

one shots

two birds

everlong

fear of the dark*

something sweet

cherry*

hysteria*

sweet creature

snake mountain blues* (cowboy au)

requests

epiphany

the very first night*

no more tears

forever

in the night

delicate

duality part 2 part 3*

sick day part 2

reaper

threesome (+ könig)*

monster!ghost (+ könig)

angel on my shoulder

mask kink

faked o*

protective!ghost*

jealous!ghost*

sub!ghost*

readers crush on ghost

ghost & cats (gn!reader)

headcanons

ghost x sunshine wife!reader hc

ghosts corruption kink*

ghosts office*

lieutenant ghost*

ghosts breeding kink*

ghosts tongue piercing*

jealous!ghost*

ghost x touched starved so

141 oneshots & headcanons

141 x fem!reader*

141 and calling them daddy

141 x adhd!reader

price x recruit!reader*

under prices desk*

price x adhd!reader

prices superiority kink*

price x noisy!wife*

gaz x sunshine wife!reader hc

homecoming (könig x wife!reader)*

sharp shooter (könig x fem!reader)*

ser schön (könig x gn!reader)*

könig x sunshine wife!reader hc

graves x enemy!reader*

[lowlydogs]

Sub!Konig headcanons.

GN reader. Reader can be read as penetrating/not.

Konig has a very, very conflicted relationship with submission.

Independence is not exclusive from wanting structures to obey. It's why he's snug and relaxed in the military hierarchy: He has a clear place and name, while still having a figure to follow and report to.

The biggest thing that impeded Konig from trying a game of mounting with you was his frail pride. Oh, his pride. The man has the nasty ego of a nerd-turned-frat. Convincing him alone took a month of carefully placed hints and suggestive words to have him skeptically consider the idea.

So, out of goodwill and (mainly) to ensure he doesn't stomp away flustered mid-session, you opted to treat him gently. Make it feel like a situation he can partake in with dignity, not have it ripped off of him.

The first time it happened, to anyone of less experience, Konig might've looked unimpressed and at worst, constipated. You never had him this quiet, nothing but his piercing, consuming eyes observing every move. For the first time in your life, as you prepared yourself and squeezed lube into your hands, you felt daunted by him.

However, eventually, you realize a thing after the initial suspense passes. In solid 5 minutes, Konig has done absolutely nothing but lay supine, legs just silently spread.

The ruthless sniper of Kortac is a pillow princess.

But you're a soldier of your words. Stripping him naked all except the mask on his face and his socks, holding his leg open, you planted kisses on his neck and sunk in. That is when he stops being quiet, as the lewd sound of wet plops and whines (whines) fills the room. Konig came barely minutes later, his leg tensing and his head thrown back. You take him only on a second round, feel this goliath of a man arch his back and palm at you until too shortly, he comes again. You lay down against him and softly caressed his back as he shakingly breathed in and out. That’s how it was. Brief and soft.

Outside the power trip of fucking a man taller than a door and the tantalizing sight of his fucked-out eyes, it was... pretty disappointing sex. You could admit that.

Short and sweet, certain, but you had to jack yourself off afterward and you were certain this was the only time Konig would bottom to you again.

That is, until two days later, you nearly killed Konig flinging a cup of water at him when you found him casually sitting on your barrack bed in complete darkness.

Jesus christ, you're more than open to dom him once more, but couldn't he found any more normal way to ask that?

However, that complaint perished quick on your tongue as Konig tugged at your wrist and reticently pressed it down against his abdomen, pulling you into his open legs. You felt the outline of his abs, his fuzzy happy trail, a shy little bulge in his boxers. God bless his soul, he lasted just a bit longer and held on just stronger. The bed mildly shook as you roughened your pace. He shed tears and wheezed like a particularly pathetic animal, burying his face in the crane of your neck, squeezing your back. He lasted three rounds this time: For that little tenacity, you rewarded him with a good boy. Shivers ran down his spine like he climaxed again. Satisfaction warmly swelled in you as you gently flipped and big spooned him that night, pleasantly spent and exhausted.

That is until you found him in your barracks again next evening. You pushed him out, told him you had patrol tomorrow. Then he was there the next evening. Then the evening after that.

Something in your dynamics irreversibly changed after what happened, that was assured and guaranteed. The package of "Fucking your coworker till he cries" came with a warning label, loud and clear. Hell, you even calculated for it and wrote down all scenarios, of everything that could possibly branch and happen. Maybe he’d be respectful of it, have some maturity, or he’d avoid the topic entirely. The most annoying it'll get is he’d distance himself, or worse, antagonize you. All you expected and didn’t particularly care for, outside of professional reasons. But out of everything, Konig turning up every night hands politely set in his lap is the thing that shakes you off your feet. The sniper had become disturbingly benign, acting more like an awkward teenager than the self-assured bastard he once was.

He was different. He didn’t call you every synonym of an imbecile when you missed a shot. Offered to take your night shift when you bitched about begin too tired for it. Weird backhanded words of admiration that both praised and called you a bitch. In one of the nights he arrived, he had lit candles. Not just any candles. The sexy, rose-scented, red valentine candles. It was getting weird.

You finally fully realized the gravity of the situation on Pizza day. At lunch, he silently shared a piece of his pizza with you. You looked at him agape with horrified eyes.

His pizza.

Did you just fuck Konig into sainthood?

[as-is-above-so-below]

The Captain - Simon Riley x Sniper!Reader, Wife!Reader

Part 4: Visitors

summary: Ghost’s sniper wife (reader) joins Task Force 141 on an op, against his wishes call sign: Freyja warning: implied child loss Note: Thank you for all of your support! I'm starting to run low on ideas for the Rileys. If y'all would like more, I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments or my DMs! I will say, my BIG Ghost headcanon is that he has a tongue piercing, so do with that what you will *side eye* Enjoy and blessed be! << Previous | Next >>

John cracked the door to the hospital room and poked his head in. “I heard you kids are ready for visitors?”

“You’re in your forties, Price. You’re hardly older.”

“And yet, here I am, honorary granddad.”

Simon was too focused on the small bundle in his arm, gently tracing a tiny button nose before laying his open palm on her belly. He had shed his balaclava hours ago but still sported a skull-printed facemask. He recently left his hair longer than usual on the top but kept it tight on the sides. It was thick and almost shaggy, blonde locks starting to wave and curl at the ends.

The group entered the room, a massive barrage of foil and latex balloons squeezing through the door frame behind them. The sergeants wore beaming smiles as they rushed to Freyja, laid back in bed, and each thrust huge, full bouquets of flowers. “Oh dear Jesus,” she laughed tiredly, taking them both and resting them on the table at her bedside. She would ask the nurses to take care of them later. Surely they would have some vases she could borrow until they went home. 

Most of her labor was spent on her feet, unable to bring herself to get in bed for hours. She took to either hunching over it, Simon’s calloused hands gripping hers and dragging up and down her spine, or practically hanging from his shoulders, her forehead pressed against his chest. In a state of pure exhaustion, Price convinced her to give her feet rest, even if only for a little bit.

Not wanting to overwhelm her as the boys fussed over her, John calmly approached with a soft smile and placed a hand on her head. “You broken?” he asked, petting her hair as the boys tied off the balloons to the rails of the bed.

“I’m good,” she smiled back, leaning into the touch. She motioned for a hand, and Price and Soap helped her adjust to sitting up straighter. Johnny bent down and pressed a loud, wet kiss to her cheek, which she batted away with a scrunched nose. “Si, bring her here. Price first.”

“Aww, not fair! ‘M the best lookin’ uncle! I should go first!”

“Johnny,” Simon warned, giving the Scot a warning look. “Keep it down before I revoke your godfather privileges.” It was an empty threat, but he piped down anyway.

Soap was a human battering ram leaving the base, plowing through any soldier and recruit that got in the way as Gaz, Ghost, and Freyja followed closely behind. John saw a small smile on her flushed face when Gaz and Soap squeezed into the front seat together, chanting We’re having a baby over and over, to which she retorted, I didn’t realize the 141 was a military polycule.

John nestled the infant into the crook of his elbow, her swaddle shifting to leave her arms free. She squirmed, moving from Simon’s arms to John’s, her pink little face scrunching up in irritation. He gently brushed a finger along her sternum, which her tiny hand wrapped around, and she settled again. “She’s beautiful, Y/N.”

Johnny leaned over the Captain’s shoulder, Kyle doing the same on the other side. “God help her if she gets your ugly mug, Lieutenant,” Gaz teased, wiggling one of her feet within the blanket.

Ghost decided to let that one pass. “This is your granddad, lovie,” Simon said, his quiet voice rumbling. “Price, this is Joan.”

John’s eyes flickered between the man in front of him and the woman in the bed behind him. “Joan?”

“Mmm,” Simon nodded, his mask shifting as his cheeks rose underneath. He wasn’t usually so expressive but was exhausted and feeling particularly sappy.

John’s eyes watered, and he blinked back at the newborn. He had spent five long, sleepless days in that same hospital, forever yet not so long ago. John didn’t have a wife or children of his own. His team was the closest thing he had to family. He felt a fatherly responsibility to all four of them. Even then, it shouldn’t have been John Price cradling her face, whispering words of helpless encouragement, countless hours desperately pleading with command to pull Ghost out of his mission, to no avail.

Simon didn’t return until four months later.

He couldn’t remember a time before that when he had felt his heart break cleanly in two. Notifying next of kin was difficult but quick; drop the news and move on to the next. But the pain and, for lack of a better for, agony Freyja suffered during Simon’s access was unlike anything he’d witnessed.

Now the warm, healthy baby in his arms was his namesake.

“I’m honored, Simon. Thank you, both of you.”

“We were thinking ‘Joanie’ for a nickname.”

Soap whipped around, wide eyes meeting Freyja’s. “Like…Johnny? Me?” he whispered, his skin suddenly hot and his ears turning a bright shade of red. At the slightest sign of confirmation from her, he tackled his Lieutenant with his entire body weight, arms thrown around his neck. Simon grunted at the sudden contact and stumbled just a step. He awkwardly patted the man’s back with one hand.

“Johnny.”

Sniff.

“Get off of me.”

“You named yer daughter after me!”

“I named my daughter after my Captain.”

“Sure, Ghost. Whatever helps you sleep at night.”

~*~

Simon was pulled from his slumber by the soft rustling and whines from the foot of their bed. Soft morning rays peeked through the gap in the curtains. Before her cries grew to high-pitched shrills and woke Freyja from her much-needed sleep, he rolled out from the covers and shuffled to pick her up. “Mornin’, lovie,” he hummed, unwrapping the tight bundle and freeing her limbs. Simon chuckled at her long stretch, carrying her out of their bedroom and quietly closing the door behind him. She deserved a little extra sleep.

He puttered around the house with Joanie in one arm, softly chatting about their plans for the day. Simon spent a lot of time talking to her, eyes resembling his gazing up at him, smiling or gurgling occasionally when she gummed her hands. He would tell her about any messages or videos her uncles had sent, funny stories from base, tales of his and Freyja’s travels during their time in the service. He had yet to talk about his parents or her Uncle Tommy, and anything related to missions was absolutely off the table.

A tiny, soft palm smacked his chest, grabbing his attention. His lip tugged at the corner, and he playfully tapped her nose. “What’re ya doin’, there? I’ve got nothin’, unfortunately. ‘M not your mum.” Freyja would tell him his accent got thicker the more tired he was if she were awake. He never really noticed a difference.

The bottle warmer on the counter pinged, indicating that it was ready. 

He settled in the deep corner of the couch as she ate, staring up at his like she always did. “Pretty girl,” he muttered while thumbing her cheek, which was starting to get that chunky plushness with every pound she gained. He stared and stared until she shoved at the empty bottle. It was placed on the coffee table, and Simon slid down until he was on his back, with her small body perched on top of him.

“I’m not sure what I did to deserve you and your mum.” She lifted her head at the sound of his voice, another skill she had been approving. “Your granddad’s always tellin’ me I’m too hard on myself. ‘You’re a hero, Simon, you save thousands of lives every day’,” he said, mimicking John’s posh accent. “Certainly don’t feel like a hero. It’s our job to protect people. ‘We get dirty and the world stays clean’.” Simon snorted, and the baby cooed at him, stretching to palm at his face.

“How’s that work? I’m supposed to keep the public safe but I couldn’t protect my family. I was gone. Your mum almost died.” He blinked away the hot tears in his eyes. He cleared his throat to chase away the burning ache forming. His fingers rubbed her back to ground himself, taking deep, steady breaths. When Simon turned his eyes from the ceiling back to his daughter, he saw her fighting sleep, eyes fluttering.

He could stay like that forever.

“But then we might not have you. Funny, that.”

Snoozing soundly against his warm skin, his hand firm enough to keep her in place so she couldn’t slip off. Simon got as comfy as he could without jostling the baby too much, wedging a throw pillow under his neck. 

He had never considered leaving his profession before seeing an empty nursery, dismantled and stripped to not look at it for another moment. They had both lost small pieces of themselves then. Simon had to learn to cope with the guilt of not being present for his wife during her darkest times, and Frey struggled to grasp her new reality, one that went against all of her plans at the time. 

But she was stubborn and determined to work, knowing he wouldn’t leave the force without her.

At the time, he was furious at her American pig-headedness and inability to listen to reason.

Now, with new photos littering their shelves, new toys and clothes strewn about, and his phone relentlessly ringing with desperate pleas for FaceTime calls and pictures, he was grateful. 

~*~

Where the fuck is he?

Freyja moved through their house with brows furrowed together as she searched the rooms for her husband. Panic briefly overtook her when she woke and found an empty bassinet until she realized the bed next to her was as well and figured Simon had taken their daughter to another room. 

But which one?

Eventually, she found him sprawled out on the couch, one leg dangling off the chaise and an arm thrown over his eyes. He looked peaceful with their newborn against his bare, scarred chest, slowly rising and falling with each breath. Her heart swooned, and she snapped a quick picture of the scene. Simon lifted his arm at the shutter click, his eyes half-lidded. A sleepy grin tugged at his lips, and he beckoned her over. “Hi, sweetheart,” he whispered as she bent down, securing a lazy kiss with a soft groan.

Their first few weeks as parents were blissful, even with the lack of sleep and drastic change in routine. Joanie was sleeping well, but Freyja and Simon struggled to get used to her sleep schedule. Anxiety and PTSD flared when she dreamt, and she often shot awake at any little noise, immediately going to the bassinet. He had nightmares but had gotten used to them since childhood, whereas her night terrors only started in the last couple of years.

Even at her young age, it was clear that she was already a daddy’s girl. Little Joan recognized his voice from across the house and sought him out, refusing to settle until she was in his arms or strapped to his torso. She preferred sleeping on their chests, listening to their heartbeats. She especially loved skin-on-skin contact.

Simon took to fatherhood immediately, fussing over her every need and want and happily chatting away, although they were one-sided conversations. His dad jokes were almost unbearable. If you had told her a few weeks ago that there was room in her to love Simon even more, she would have told you you were crazy. But watching him with his daughter proved her wrong. Her heart grew impossibly with every passing day.

On top of that, the sight of him with their daughter snuggled up with him, his tattooed sleeve, blonde hair mussed with sleep? God damn.

“You should know I’m dying to jump your bones right now.”

He rolled his eyes but smiled wider. “Yeah?”

“Mhm, the daddy energy’s really doin’ somethin’ for me.”

“Oh, don’t you worry, love. I’ll take ya to bed as soon as you’re able. It’s only been two months.”

Small hands grasped at his skin, alerting him to her stirring. Simon gently shushed her as he sat up, shifting her to his shoulder; she somehow looked even tinier in his hold. Something fluttered in her chest again as he nuzzled Joanie’s shoulder, and she beamed at him. He shifted under her gaze, looking amused.

“Staring’s kind of my thing, Frey. It’s unsettling.”

“I told you, fatherhood looks good on you.”

BANG BANG BANG

“Good mornin’ Mexico!” Soap’s voice cried through the door, followed by Gaz’s chesty cackles.

Only Freyja jumped when the door shook, but they both looked towards it, Simon’s brow raised. “Bloody hell, are they daft? It’s nine o’clock on a Saturday!”

“Which means it’s their only free time, and they want to see us,” she scolded and nudged him to the kitchen. He acted tough, but she knew her husband well enough to know how much the team’s affection meant to him. Neither of them had any family to speak of, whether in England or America. It takes a village to raise a baby, as they say, and what a town they had.

With a wicked smile on her face, as Simon passed her, she wound up and slapped his ass with a sharp crack, earning a hiss.

“The fuck, Frey!”

“Your fault for walking around like that! It’s scandalous!”

He was wearing grey sweatpants.

“You’re pushin’ it, love. Don’t be a cheeky brat.” (Translation, ‘I love it, please do that again’).

He disappeared into the kitchen, and Freyja tied her robe in front as someone banged on the door again. “Jesus Christ, hold your horses!”

The second the lock turned, Gaz busted the door open (it bounced off the coat rack behind it), ready to pounce. “Where’s the babe?” he cried, hands on her shoulders as he physically moved her out of his way.

“Hello to you too, Kyle. Lovely weather we’re having.”

He pecked her cheek with a quick Hello, then immediately flipped her off, storming past her towards the kitchen where soft baby noises came from. From the other room, she heard the sergeant practically squeal, “There’s my girl! Give her here!”

“Sergeant—”

“Kindly get fucked, mate!”

“I’m warning you, Garrick!”

A scuffle and light cursing rang through the house, and Soap’s laugh shook the walls as he hugged her tightly, squishing her. “Pure mental about that baby, he is,” he said, then kissed her forehead. “Oof, ya look like shite, hen.”

“Thank you, Soap. It’s truly a marvel that you’re still single.”

They joined Ghost and Gaz in the kitchen, Johnny carrying two large paper bags. The warm smell of butter, grease, and onions wafted through the air, and Freyja deeply inhaled, savoring it. “We brought breakfast as payment for your troubles.”

She snatched one from him, pulled one of the takeout boxes out, and threw herself at the table.

“Did you put the kettle on?” Kyle asked, smiling down at Joan and tickling her belly. She kicked her legs furiously, grabbing at his fingers with both hands in a tight baby grip. “Holy shit, the bloody grip on you!” 

Simon huffed and muttered some choice words under his breath. “I was workin’ on it when you nearly broke my door in and kidnapped my child.”

“Sweet, I’m dyin’ for a cuppa.”

As if reading each other’s minds, Soap and Freyja groaned, in sync, “Fuckin’ Brits.”

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