#sneezy fetishy bfs

[bigsnzstanacct]

Toying around with scenarios in my head for my sneezy fetishy boyfriends. Kind of thinking like… terribly allergic American studying abroad in England maybe for acting meets reserved Brit who “never” sneezes, and of course eventually we find out this is because a) his sneezes are cannon-fire-loud and b) because his own sneezes turn him on (and the combination of head-turning sneeze and sneeze-induced erection is uh… not ideal!)

Sample dialogue:

1) “The English air doesn’t agree with you, I take it?” “Oh, no air agree… agreehhhh… s-sorry gonna… eeYYYYTTTCCccchhEEWWW! Huhhh… DDZZZZSSCCcchhhOO! snf! No air agrees with me. Or not with my nose anyway.” “Bless you!” “Oh, don’t bother, I’ve got a lifetime of blessings already and you’ll use up your entire fifteen word a day quota two and a half fits in.”

2) “You know, after all this time I’ve never seen you sneeze.” “Yes, and let’s hope you never will.” “…?” “My sneezes are… rather explosive. And, thankfully, rare.”

Also just really invested in the reveal scene where they both figure out they have the fetish? Or one figured it out about the other? Either way, very exciting.

Also vaguely into the idea that the less allergic louder sneezer like… sneezes even harder when he’s turned on? So he gets in these cycles of sneezing harder and turning himself on more and like his (near-)orgasm sneeze(s) is in the “mildly unrealistic” territory. And I guess the idea is that he can be turned on without sneezing but if he turns himself on by sneezing the fit will sort of perpetuate itself? Whatever fantasies can be fantasies.

[bigsnzstanacct]

More NSFW fetishist x fetishist talk below the cut…

“So uhhh, you know I’m allergic, like… ridiculously so. Sneeze all the damn time. But what about you, cutie?”

“Oh uh,” Tyler imagined Jonathan, tragically hours away, could just see him putting a hand behind his head shyly, the gesture putting his large bicep on display. How characteristic of him—his awkwardness only magnifying his attractiveness. “Well uh I don’t sneeze as much as you do—“

“Honey, nobody sneezes as much as I do.”

Tyler heard no answer but a muffled little grunt. “Oh, you liked hearing that, huh?”

“Mmm… mhm! I um… I really liked it, yeah.” He said, and now Tyler could see how he was squirming, squeezing his legs together, fighting the urge to whip it out and start stroking himself then and there, just on the phone. He’d obviously collected himself a bit before he spoke again.

“But yeah I don’t sneeze as much as you do but um, when I do… I dunno they get pretty um… big? I dunno if you like big sneezes but—“

Now it was Tyler’s turn to squirm. Fuck. “Yeah, I like big sneezes. Like cats ‘like’ catnip, like fucking squirrels ‘like’ a nut.”

“Like you like a nut, heh” the bigger man chuckled. Tyler just rolled his eyes.

“Anyways, uh… yeah. People say I sneeze pretty big, when I do sneeze. I mean I can uh… I usually make people jump, you know if there’s a people around or if it’s quiet or whatever. Especially if I actually get around something I’m allergic to. There’s not that much stuff that makes me sneeze real bad but they make me sneeze *really* bad. And the more I do it the more like… I mean… you know. It’s kinda like how yours get louder sometimes, like… at the end of your um fits? Or after a false start or whatever? You know, just like… the more I sneeze and the more it keeps itching me the more they get like… bigger? Harder? Like you know, your body’s just trying to get it out however it can? And uh, that’s when they can get *really* big you know but um. Sorry I just babbled a lot, haha.”

For a second Jonathan didn’t hear anything from the other man, and his stomach swooped, worrying he’d said something wrong “oh shit sorry was that like too much information, or—“

“FUCK no, goddamn it, that was like… the hottest thing I’ve ever heard, fuck, I—I wanna touch myself so bad and you haven’t even sneezed for me yet. You uh… you have a gift for this, Jonny.”

“I mean… why don’t you?”

“Why don’t I… what?”

“Touch yourself? I um… I gotta be honest I’m already…”

“You started without me? You bastard!”

“ ‘s not my fault, you try listening to the hottest guy you’ve ever met talk about how nobody sneezes more than him—“

“Yeah well YOU try listening to the hottest guy YOU’VE ever met talk about how he rattles the damn windows when he sneezes—“

“Rattle the windows, make the walls shake—“

“This is it! This it it, huh you’re trying to kill me from sheer horniness before we can ever—wait—“ finally his brain caught up with his mouth and—“did you say I’m the hottest guy you’ve ever met?”