#skwistokface

[phoenxwright]

sorry for party rocking

[chunglesworth]

polyklok of any sort?

Skwistokface heart emoji

[basu-shokikita]

Kloktober 2023 Day 4

Your Fave Headcanon

As it has been made abundantly clear with my previous entries, my favorite Metalocalypse ship is Skwistok. However, while Toki's fixation with Skwisgaar is more than confirmed by canon, there's another guy who I like to imagine is also very into Skwisgaar: Murderface.

And so, please enjoy my first attempt at Skwistokface shenanigans that accidentally ended up being closer to fic length than drabble one.

Murderface scrolled down Skwisgaar’s gallery page angrily. It was so stupid, why did Skwisgaar get so many more likes than him? When the selfies they uploaded were virtually the same? Yeah, okay, maybe he didn’t have a fucking flat stomach or a hairless goddamn chest. Was it his fault that he didn’t have rosy perky nipples? That God had cursed him with flabby tits and a malformed body? Did anyone think he asked to be born with boxy brown hair instead of golden wavy hair? Who in their right mind would want to be a hideous-looking monster instead of some annoyingly handsome knight from Heavy Metal-land?! 

No one!

Fucking no one.

And what the fuck was the deal with Skwisgaar anyway? Posing like that, like he was hot fucking shit. Staring at the camera like he knew exactly who was on the other side of the screen. Unbuttoning his pants mysteriously, like nobody knew what was down there. We fucking know you have a big dick! Everyone knows it! Who cares! Why don’t you just-

His stream of thoughts was abruptly interrupted when he accidentally pressed like on a picture instead of scrolling further. Panicked, he was about to unlike it when he realized there was no way Skwisgaar was going to get a notification for it. The guy got thousands of likes a day, he was going to be fine. 

Also, it’s not like pressing the heart exclusively meant you liked a picture? Maybe, it was because it was useful for reference. Or because he wanted to save it to make fun of it later. Or just because why fucking not? It was a free country wasn’t it? He could do whatever he wanted. Hell, he could press like on every Skwisgaar picture if he so damn pleased, who was to stop him? Fuck yeah, he was going to do just exactly that! Yeah, he was liking every single one of these now! He could do that! Fuck you, Skwisgaar! Fuck your pretty body!

“What ams you watchi-” A voice spoke from behind him and he jumped off his seat like a possessed spring. When he turned around, he found a baffled Toki staring back at him.

“Toki!” He shouted in frustration. “What the fuck do you want?!”

The kid’s jaw had dropped, eyes wide open to match, and it dawned on Murderface with great horror that Toki had seen his screen. Fuck. “Wait,” He raised both hands, forgetting his phone was in one of them. The device plopped on the ground, screen up, a close-up of Skwisgaar’s happy trail being the cherry on top. “Schit!” He said, and bent down to grab his phone, safely tucking it in his pocket. He took a deep breath before facing Toki again. “Lischten, I can explain-”

“You was looking at Skwisgaar’s naked pictors!” Toki exclaimed and covered his mouth, like he had blurted a forbidden word.

“Schhhh!!” Murderface gestured at Toki to quiet down. “I waschn’t…it waschn’t naked picturesch, okay? It wasch, uh…” He scratched his neck, averting his gaze awkwardly. “Hisch Dethschtagram.”

Toki raised a skeptical eyebrow, and it pissed Murderface so much. He could take some judgmental looks from Nathan, Skwisgaar, Pickles, even, but fucking Toki?! “Why were you lookins at his Dethstragrams? It ams for the goils.”

“Oh, scho I can’t look?!” Murderface said. “I’m schorry, do I need an autorizchation to look at a fucking webschite?! Why can’t I look at Schkwisgaar’s fucking schelfies?! I’m a perschon too! I’m a fucking individual!”

Far from being convinced, Toki stifled a chuckle. “You ams gays.”

“No, I’m not!” He yelled loud enough that Toki jolted, so he lowered his voice. “No, I’m not. I juscht…I got hisch page recommended, okay?” Looking away humbly, he scratched his neck. “It probably happened ‘causche we follow each other and schtuff…”

“But Skwisgaars doesn’t follow anyones.” Toki said with an impassive expression.

“God damn it, Toki!” Murderface shouted. Wait, really? Jesus Christ, Skwisgaar was such a fucking pretentious dick!

...Wait a minute, how did Toki know that? Wouldn’t that knowledge at least require a check at Skwisgaar’s profile? Also, how did he recognize what Murderface was looking at so fast? His eyes narrowed as he stared at Toki with suspicion.

It was like thunder had struck Toki, his smug demeanor vanished, as he swallowed heavily, averting his gaze nervously. Slowly but surely, he was walking backwards. “Ams gonna goes now…” He announced in a slightly shaky voice.

“What do you have in there?” Murderface asked, noticing the small cardboard box that Toki had in his hands. 

“Huh?” Toki’s brows furrowed together and he hid the box behind him. “N-Nothings!” He had always been such a shitty liar. 

“Lemme schee.” Murderface stepped forward instead, but when he tried to get a hold of the box, Toki moved it up so he couldn’t reach it. “Toki!”

“I-It ams nothings!” The idiot insisted, though judging from the expression in his face, it could not be more far away than that. There was sweat forming on his temple.

“Oh, scho you can schpy on some, but I can’t schee what you have?!” Murderface jumped to try to catch the box, and Toki moved it to the left. “That’sch bullschit!”

“I wasn’t spyings on yous!” Toki defended himself. “You was sittings in da middle of da living rooms being gays over Skwisga-”

“I told you I waschn’t!” Murderface managed to grab the box. He raised his eyes to Toki and saw the guy had turned pale.

“L-Lets go, Williams.” Toki attempted to feign composure, even though his arms were shaking like a dildo. 

“Oh, fuck you.” Murderface muttered under his breath and tried to snatch the box but Toki refused to let go. “Give it to m-” They began struggling, grunting and whining, neither refusing to give up until Toki lost his balance and they both fell to the floor with a cry in unison.

After a few disoriented seconds, lead by the pain of his ass impacting against the hard wood like that, Murderface opened his eyes and saw the floor was scattered with something. Squares? He picked one and looked at it closely. A photograph of…Skwisgaar? Sitting with his guitar? 

He picked another one. A close-up of Skwisgaar smiling, the particular smile he did when he wanted to seduce women. Wondering if he had hit his head too hard, Murderface grabbed yet another picture. A headless shot of Skwisgaar’s clothed chest.

“What the…”

Lost, he skimmed around. A zoom-in of Skwisgaar’s lips. A mid shot of Skwisgaar from behind. Some candid picture of Skwisgaar with the wolves. A piece from a photo shoot where he posed provocatively with his legs open. A newspaper clipping of him with one of his previous bands. His bare legs in the water. Skwisgaar talking with Nathan in the recording booth. Hanging with a groupie at a nightclub. Grimacing at the camera while eating a wrap. Wasted off his fucking mind. The selfies from his Dethstagram.

Skwisgaar. Skwisgaar. Skwisgaar.

It was all pictures of Skwisgaar. 

“Aaahhh!!!” Toki swayed his arms like a bird about to take off. “Don’t looks!! Don’t looks!!” Frantically, he began shoving the photos back into the box, as if that could make Murderface unseen everything.

Still shocked, Murderface stood up. “You made fun of me…Called me gay and everything…While hoarding picturesch of Schkwisgaar like a fucking weirdo!” He pointed an accusing finger. “A homoschekschual weirdo!” 

The panic was written all over Toki’s face, cheeks as red as the carpet he was currently sitting on. “Ams not like that!” He said. “They amsn’t mine! Ams just holdings dem for somebodies!”

“Yeah, like who?” Murderface grinned devilly. “Your imaginary friendsch?” He spoke in a mocking feminine tone. “Oh, Toki, can you holds these for me? I want to jack off to them late-”

“Shuts up, Moidaface!” Toki frowned, stopping the collecting to glare at him. “You ams the gay ones!”

“How am I the-”

“What ams you dildos doingks?” Skwisgaar suddenly materialized in the living room. 

Toki immediately threw himself at the floor again to hide the remaining pictures scattered across the carpet and Murderface, just as fast, stood in front of Toki so that Skwisgaar’s peripheral view was partially covered. It’s not that he wanted to protect Toki’s gay shameful secret, but if he was found with that shit, the arrogant asshole wouldn’t hesitate to implicate him too. 

“Fuck off, what are you doing here?!” He asked, hoping his overt aggression would divert Skwisgaar’s attention.

“Yeah!” Toki agreed. “Fucks you, Skwisgaar, leaves us alone!” After a pause, he added. “We ams playing Twisters and yous not inviteds!”

“Yeah!” Murderface crossed his arms smugly. “You are not invited. ‘Causche you are not our friend.”

Skwisgaar grimaced at them like he had witnessed something particularly disgusting. “Whatevors.” He rolled his eyes and turned on his heels, mumbling something about stupid dildos. 

Once he was out of sight, both Toki and Murderface let out a sigh of relief. Thank fucking God, Murderface face thought, his heart still ringing in his ear. That was way too fucking close. What was Skwisgaar doing roaming around like a creepy ghost anyway? Go fuck some divorced women and fuck off!

And it was all this little dipshit’s fault, Murderface turned to Toki with a frown. The latter seemed to sense it, because he looked back defiantly. They kept glaring at each other for a while, neither feeling ready to admit anything.

Well, besides hate for Skwisgaar.

[aidoneira]

Hey pals, it’s me, Facebones! Welcome to the…

Do you need to know how to properly maintain your rhythm guitarist? Well, look no further because I’m here to help! This simple guide will help you learn new ways to make your rhythm guitarist feel loved. 💕

(18+ - Sweet, cute, soft Skwistokface ahead! Meeting of the minds between @pipartuuli 💛 and me, I hope you all enjoy it!)

[agentkaz]

dethentines tuesday 2/13 monday 2/19: ot3 or ocs (or both)

just as i don't really have One otp because i ship so much, i don't really have One ot3. i ship these guys in so many combinations. i do tend to focus on stuff with toki (he's my main rp character so he's My Guy), so here's a good combo, i think.

[yourfandompersn]

skwistokface sorry

polyamory would not always fix the love triangle. sometimes it would make it much, much worse. but they should do it anyway

[pastasaladatthefunction]

[dichromaticdyke]

some platonic skwistokface for the soul. band siblings need to torment each other more often.

[skwigelfskwisgaar]

So, mun. You a Murdertooth or Skwisface type of fan?

//ooc:

I'm a Skwistokface truther! Toki has 2 hands!!! He doesn't need to only pick one when he can have both!! HE DOESN'T HAVE TO PICK BETWEEN ONE OR THE OTHER!!!

[louisblue02]

AND ANOTHER THING if you label your fanfiction as “Skwistokface” and it’s just Murderface standing there and being excluded while Skiwsgaar and Toki get 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝓪𝓵𝓲��𝓲𝓸𝓾𝓼 your ass is gonna be waking up in the appalachian mountains DONT LABEL IT SKWISTOKFACE IF WILLIAM IS BEING CUCKED THE WHOLE TIME

I’m not a Skwistok hater it’s just not my favorite ship however I do kinda hate when I’m trying to find a murdertooth fanfic and it’s skwistokface get that freaky ass white boy OUT OF HERE!!!

[cladestruction]

PART IV of my super long aotd thoughts (and prayers) commentary/analysis extravanganza🤪

warning: spoilers. repetition of words/expressions hehe. badly written (english is not my first language lol). looong text. curse words. biased opinions because this is my blog and i get to do with it as i please.

previously: part I | part II | part III

this is the last part!!!

smacking fiesta!: they made a fire for Murderface awww my fucking HEART. i love that this movie insists on making a point that people should take responsibility but not victimize themselves. case in point: yes Nathan fucked up when he wrote the wrong song (tho again, that was actually part of the prophecy) because he decided to surrender to hatred, sadness and overall give up on his responsibilities. it’s great to see him take the blame(?) however yeah, Pickles did good at reminding him that this is no time for him to drown in self-pity and doubt himself. making a mistake is NOT equal to being an incapable person. Nathan should not doubt his own skills, quite the opposite, this is the time for him to believe in himself, trust his bandmates and push forward. also yes after season 4 and a portion of this movie, i admit it’s cool to see Pickles taking out his stress on Nathan lmao. on the other hand WOW??? why does Nathan Explosion fall from a slap, that must’ve a hell of a smack. the little “quit hitting me :(“ was cute aksjdhas. Murderface feeling better and thanking the guys is so precios he’s so baby in this scene. and i love that this is actually not the first time Skwistokface have felt weird when Pickles and Nathan fight like a married couple (throwback to Writersklok) and that’s so CUTE. he says “should we get going?” to the guitarists while Pickles does a shock therapy on Nathan or something and ugh they’re such a family. i again absolutely love that Magnus is in the notebook. it means so much to me that Nathan straight up says he’d want for Magnus to come back, somehow, so they could fix their friendship. it makes the suicide so much more tragic and it made me very sad but that makes the message much more powerful. forgiving and apologizing, taking responsability and knowing your own worth are central to the message of the movie and i really really like it. someone pointed out thath “i’m just a gear in the wheel of the clock” is the very first line of mtl and i’m happy Brendon brought it back to close this story. and for fans like me, that spent over a decade loving this show is beautiful to hear this once again while Nathan Explosion himself discovers the true meaning of it.

mommy on the wheel: ok yeah i love Pickles bla bla bla i think he’s very very cool in this scene. Pickles is my favorite, Rehabklok and Skyhunter are one of my favorite episodes/songs so seeing him drive again WHILE SOBER is so so important to me you don’t even know. and yes the line “Toki be a good boy and bring mommy his scotch” rearranged the chemicals in my brain tysm Brendon Small, i’m officially insane.

plugging-in: YES EDGAR JOMFRU SWEEP!!! i’m sooo happy he’s back and is central to this section of the movie. he’s a very important character so i’m happy we get to see him interact with Dethklok in such a cool sequence and i’m also thankful that he threw a sandwich to Crozier. it was deserved. the plug-in sequence is very cool visually AND thematically, seeing the guys fly and be at the center of such a complicated operation is cool, i’m a fan. we also get more exposition, i LOVE that only here the guys Finally remember the dethlights and start to comprehend their place in the prophecy. i’d love more of this (dethklok realizing the true reach of their powers) because it’s a very short scene, but well, you can’t have it all. when Nathan slips and falls off the wing(?) and Pickles screams “Oh no, Nathan!” yeah, Nickles wins once again. usually i’m not a fan of scenes where the characters start giving a speech in the middle of an action scene but it’s cool here. for all we know Nathan must be constantly thinking he will die at any time so it’s valid for him to want to get sincere and cheesy. also yes it’s so so important for me (and for Pickles) when Nathan finally confesses to have never had anything with Abigail. i like that he was honest and vulnerable not because of himself but because the others deserved to know. he also recognizes it wouldn’t have been right and that’s some good shit. the entire message to Abigail, “wherever you are in this world (…)” was so heartwarming. i do think Nathan and Abigail could have been a great couple (especifically after Nathan’s character development, not before) and this line is the basis of that. he realizes that showing appreciation is not limited to fucking someone and then jump to a relationship. he respects her and that will stay that way even if they never connect on a romantic level, and i adore that. on a personal note: as an aro, this scene made me cry. Nathan recognizing how much someone can mean to you and at the same time letting them go/not ending up with them is a message i can connect with to a personal level. wanting them to be happy as you are ready to part ways and focus on yourself (when Nathan says “i’ll grow stronger”) is a beautiful message. AND (yes sorry this section is practically me projectiong and making everything personal) THE LINE “because i’ll always have my relationship with music” IS ALSO SO IMPORTANT TO MEEE. i too sometimes feel like i can connect more with music than with people and to hear Nathan Explosion say that made me feel so validated, so accompanied.

gay elevator: EVERYONE say thank you Edgar for bringing back Toki’s teddy bear. say it or else. if your homie grabs your shoulder, looks into your eyes and calls you mommy, that’s a flirting i’m sorry i don’t make the rules. and i don’t care what anyone says “i’ll see you on stage” is code for “i love you so so much” case CLOSED. “this one’s for Knubbler” HELL YEAH IT IS !!! wasted opportunity to give them the armor in this scene oh well. wasted opportunity to have Toki speak in norwegian here or something since they are in Norway but ok. SOS being both a distress signal to the fans and an acronym for Song Of Salvation is GENIUS. Crozier+Edgar was not in my bingo cards but oh boy i am so happy to see it.

fuck you and your beard old man: Nathan Explosion is the man of my dreams. he’s so fearless and so smart and so so beautiful i will kill a god for him i don’t care. also yeah fuck you Salacia don’t talk to him like that. Toki a kombucha is not a meal please ajsdhkajshd. Pickles ordering for Nathan is so CUTE !!! those are soulmates right there UGHHH. and Pickles looking at him so fondly while Nathan ponders the idea of marrying his drummer right then and there??? wow THAT’S just…wow. i keep winning. when Nathan tells them “i think we’re going to die” and their reactions it was both hilarious and sad. they really are just some: dudes. they’ve faced dead before but here they are, freaking out in a jail cell together. i love them so much FUCK. missed opportunity for another band hug. dethklok in handcuffs walking in the snow is a great visual hear me out. also dethklok crucified in a spinning death-disk is such an amazing concept too. Nathan repeating The Gears to himself is so IMPORTANT TO MEEE. watch me doing the same everytime i have to face an important decision/task. the people with the masks look hella cool too. Nathan has the biggest brain ever! and he’s so so brave and strong i LOVE HIM !!! i love how he sacrificed himself mirroring the countless klokateers’ deaths throughout the show: ready to serve a bigger purpose. Pickles touching his face and turning to see the guys with a worried look is UGH. Edgar Jomfru will be missed, he was such a badass and he singlehandedly did so much for dethklok and humanity. Skwisgaar putting his hand on a distressed Toki saved my life yup yup.

Salacia is a dorito: fuckkk stop killing the fans dude. THE DETHLIGHTS!!! now that’s an epic meet and greet with your favorite band. GO INTO THE WATER SONG OF THE CENTURYYY and my favorite song to listen at the beach. the WHALE IS BACKKK!!! i’m so happy with that ending, the fact that dethklok, as powerful as they are, were NOT gods after all and were only there to help the whale is a concept i’ll never get over. so so so damn cool. we get to see how fucked up it is for the boys when the powers leave them and it’s so uncool and unglamorous i can help but love it!!! Skwisgaar my man i love him so much he really has been in Toki’s arms for ¾ of this movie he’s living the dream. and yesss that teddy bear is stronger than Salacia, we love an immortal legend. the ending sequence is cute. is short and very cheesy but i love it. it’s a love letter for the fans in universe and irl. i am so so happy. WE are the army of the doomstar. i love that when Nathan starts speaking with his heart he CAN’T STOP. he’s so sweet i love him. and CHARLES LOOKS SO GOOD IN THAT LAST SHOT I WANT TO LOOK AFTER HIM AND CURE HIS WOUNDS AND KISS HIS FOREHEAD. and yup the movie is over and i’m hyperventilating and shakingand crying.

I love this movie so much it makes me look insane. but yeah. this is the end of my super long aotd extravaganza. thank you so so much for reading to the very end. sorry this took so long. kisses on the forehead for everyone who saw this movie and enjoyed it as much as i did. take care and have a great day. bye bye!

[chunglesworth]

Ok request page is officially FULL I added like two more funny things to fill in the gaps but that’s it THANK YOU ALL FOR THE REQUESTS THIS HAS BEEN SO FUN I’m not done doing requests I’ll do them for like a week more but then I gotta go back to college BUTT… Thank you metal tumblr I love you

[basu-shokikita]

Dethentines 2024 Day 6

OT3

As it has been made exceedingly clear by now, Skwistok is my OTP. My one and only, my endgame, the only pair I can see romantically in Metalocalypse, etc...

Even so, I have a number of ships I enjoy in very particular ways and I thought today would be a good day to dip on that. So, for day 6 of Dethentines you're getting a Skwistokface extravanganza because I like it and I think it's underrated! God bless!

It wasn’t everyday that Murderface felt inspired, but when he did, it made up for all the other days. He was overflowing with inspiration and creativity, stimulated unlike any other, capable of writing the sickest solos and providing the most important contributions to the…

“Gods damns it, Moidaface, dat amsnt hows you plays de F sharps.” Skwisgaar interrupted him for the upteempth time. “I tolds you, you gotsa be on de fours frets.”

Murderface frowned. He honestly didn’t know why he had to convince Skwisgaar for his idea to be approved. It’s not like he was his boss, was he? They were all equal in Dethklok, right? Except for Toki, obviously, Toki couldn’t do shit.

But Murderface was an original member, he should have a say, just like the others. It’s not like Pickles had to talk with Skwisgaar first before Nathan heard him out. So, why did he have to do that? What, so because Skwisgaar was fucking hot and talented that made him better than the others? Was that what was happening now? Was that the band Murderface joined?!

“Soes…ams you gonna plays ors?” Skwisgaar asked, raising his one particular and condescending eyebrow. “I gots stuff to does.”

Like what? Bang old ladies and fret the guitar all day?

He was going to say that when a Dethphone started ringing. Before Murderface had the time to check if it was his, Skwisgaar had already pulled his own from his pocket. “Hullos?”

God. Now he was going to have a whole conversation when Murderface was trying to show him something amazing. He started replaying his solo while Skwisgaar mumbled on the phone.

“Ja…Ja, I ams with Moidaface. In de studios.”

Murderface was really getting into this solo. This shit was fucking great! What the hell was Skwisgaar talking about?!

“We ams playi- whats? Rights nows?” Skwisgaar glanced over at Murderface and then at his bass. “...Shores. Byes.” A click indicated the end of the call.

“Who wasch it?” Murderface asked while still playing, trying not to seem too interested. Was Nathan asking how they were doing? Pickles, maybe? Were they secretly excited to know what he was cooking up?

“Toki.” Skwisgaar said in a deflated tone and Murderface cursed at the guy in his head.

Fucking…Toki. 

“...And what did he want?” 

“He wanteds- Moidaface you ams screwingks de F sharps again!”

“Okay, scho why don’t you teasch me how it isch, schinsche you know scho much!” Murderface said defensively. He was starting to get really tired of Skwisgaar’s attitude.

“Dats whats Is beens…” Skwisgaar leaned forward and pressed Murderface’s finger against the third string on the fourth fret. “Just stays- Just stays…” He pressed Murderface’s finger harder but Murderface kept pulling it off. “Just keeps pressingks deres!”

“It fucking hurtsch!” Murderface yelled.

“It wouldn’ts hurts if yous actuallies prascktiscked!” Skwisgaar countered

Murderface glared at him with disdain. “Your teaching schuschks.” 

Skwisgaar’s eyes went wide for an instant and then he got up. “Alrights, dats it.”

“What?”

“Ams gonna makes you plays dats notes.” Skwisgaar looked down at him. “Gets up.”

“Why?”

“Gets up!”

“Okay, fine! Jeschusch!”

Skwisgaar frowned at him before he started surrounded him. 

“Wait, what are you-”

“Just stays stills, Moidaface.” Skwisgaar said from behind him. “You mades me do dis.”

“Do wha-” Suddenly, Skwisgaar’s arms were surrounding him and, little after, Murderface felt Skwisgaar’s chest press against his back. “What the-”

“Just follows my fingers.” Skwisgaar said in a low tone, his face next to Murderface’s. This time, his fingers were gentle when they pressed against his. “Dere you goes…and dens you can does dis…” He moved Murderface’s hand with his own. “Ja, dats good…”

Unfortunately, Murderface could hardly pay attention to what he was playing, as good as it was sounding. The closeness, the almost intimate way with which Skwisgaar was touching him, his voice in Murderface’s ear... 

Murderface couldn’t think, he couldn’t think, and it’s like the room was getting hotter all of sudden. Like the temperature had dropped to hell-like levels. Did he have a fever? Was he getting sick? Was he dying?!

“Sees how easies it ams whens you listens to me?” Skwisgaar said so smugly but Murderface was already sweating, unable to come up with a retort, unable to move even. “...Moidaface?”

“Ah!” A voice shouted, and Murderface raised his eyes. It was Toki standing at the door in shock, eyes like they were about to pop out of its sockets, his jaw dropped to the ground. 

“Oh, Tokes.” Skwisgaar straightened up. “I was just teachingks Moidaface hows to-”

But Toki wasn’t listening, walking fast towards them, an expression of unbridled anger in his face. His guitar, hanging from his neck, knocked against his thighs with each of his steps.

“Toki?” Skwisgaar called him with confusion.

“You!” Toki pointed an accusing finger and Murderface began to flinch. “You rats!”

“Whats?”

The veins on Toki’s face were terrifying. Oh, shit, he was furious, and Murderface never wanted to be near that. He closed his eyes in fear, awaiting for the impact.

Yet nothing arrived.

Suddenly, there was a pull from his arm. “You ams tryings to steals Moidaface from mes!” Toki exclaimed childishly. 

He opened his eyes in surprise and saw it was Toki’s hand grabbing him from the arm. 

“Heugh?” Skwisgaar raised both eyebrows. “No, I ams teachingks him de notes.”

“No, you ams stealings hims from me!” Toki insisted with a pout. He pulled from Murderface again. “Let’s goes, Moidaface.” He was strong enough that he was going to drag him away from sheer strength alone.

“Noes.” Skwisgaar was now grabbing Murderface from the other arm. “We ams goingks to keeps prackstickings.”

“Noes!” Toki yelled. “We ams goings to plays! Comes on, Moidaface!” His grip on Murderface was getting stronger.

“I saids noes.” Skwisgaar was frowning now. “We ams prackstiskings.”

Toki turned to him, offended. After a few seconds glaring at each other, he asked. “Why you gots to copies me?”

“Seriouslies?”

“Ja! Yous always copyings me!” Toki argued. “Yous always doings whats I does! And nows yous tryings to steals my friends! Gets yous owns!”

“Toki, Is never once copies you, ams you kiddingks me?! Yous always copyings me! Yous! And yous copyings me right nows against! Goes gets someones elses, goes!”

“Noes, I wants to plays with Moidaface!”

“I don’ts cares! We ams goings to prascktice!”

“Stops copies me!”

“You stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

Caught between the bantering and the pull of two different people, Murderface couldn’t think. He couldn’t process this. This was perhaps the first time in his life two people were fighting over him. And it was pretty flattering, he didn’t know Skwisgaar and Toki liked him so much. Could it be that he was underestimating his popularity all along? 

Nice.

“Fucks you, Skwisgaar, he ams comings with me!” Toki spat, pulling harder from Murderface.

“Fucks you, Toki, he ams stayings with mes!” Skwisgaar retorted, pulling just as hard from Murderface.

“Noes, he isnts!”

“Yes, he ams!”

“Ladiesch!” Murderface raised his arms, smugness all over his face. “No need to fight over me, there’sch plenty Murderface for everyone.” 

Skwisgaar and Toki stared at him, then at each other. Then, they got more aggressive.

“You ams just jealous Moidaface ams mines best friends and favorites evers!”

“Oh, ja?” Skwisgaar challenged him. “Wells, he ams my favor tits too, and he ams also mines new rhythms guitarists!”

“Whats?” Toki was baffled. “You cants do dats!”

“Oh, yes, I cans!”

“Wells, I loves him!”

“Noes, I loves him more!”

“Stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

“Stops copies me!”

…

…..

……..

Skwisgaar stared at Murderface’s unconscious body on the floor. “You thinks he ams dead?” He glanced at Toki.

“No ways.” Toki said. “He ams laughings, sees? Totallies alives.”

Skwisgaar leaned in to inspect Murderface’s face. “Oh, ja, he is.” He straightened up. “Whats weirdos.”

“Ja, he alls be fines.” Toki sounded disinterested.

“Soes, eugh…” Skwisgaar gazed at the guitar Toki was still holding, almost apprehensively so. “Whys you knocks him outs whens you arriveds?”

“Oh.” Toki’s face turned inexpressive, though if Skwisgaar had been any closer, he would’ve been the pink tinge on his cheeks. “I don’t knows. He ams just pisseds me offs.”

“Eugh…”

“Wants to prackstice?” Toki suddenly asked. “I brings my guitars!” He lifted the bloodied guitar.

“...Ja, shores.” Skwisgaar followed Toki. “Since whens you wants to pracsticke?” He asked with skepticism.

Toki shrugged and smiled at him. “It ams a good days, rights?”

“Rights.” Skwisgaar reluctantly agreed. As Toki cleaned the blood and dust off his guitar with his shirt, he wondered. 

What were the odds that the two laziest members of the band suddenly felt like working on the same day?

[skwigelfskwisgaar]

ooc:// i already know it's a toki sweep

BUT LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT SKWISTOKFACE --

your favorite Toki Wartooth ship

[aidoneira]

Hey pals, it’s me, Facebones! Welcome to the…

Handbook for the Care of Your Rhythm Guitarist - Now complete!!

5 chapters of cute, sweet, soft, slow burn Skwistokface, now with a zazzy new cover to better reflect the contents!

✨18+ only!✨

Thanks as always to my beloved co-conspirator @pipartuuli! 💕

[miriena]

Crackin open a cold one while your bfs kiss each other