#sisko ball

[starfleetshrimps]

sisko ball

honorable mention to this thing that happened while i was making this:

[the-number-thirty-eight]

Sisko at the Disco 2.0

Now in gif form

Sisko at the Disco

[mistylacrimosa]

I know jack shit about baseball but this the best filler episode on all tv and i can prove it:

Exhibit A:

Exhibit B:

Exhibit C:

Need I say more? I don't think so

[meatmensch]

interesting point! what do you think about - wait you, you said your favorite captain is picard? oh nevermind man i don't care about your opinion

[duskentropy]

jadzia has definitely photoshopped a picture of sisko, replaced his head with a baseball and sent it to the senior officer group chat

[blunderpuff]

Sisko's baseball is not his Orb; the Orbs are the Prophets' baseballs

[dragon-in-a-fez]

Jim Kirk would beat up William Shatner in a 7-11 parking lot

Jean-Luc Picard and Patrick Stewart would write non-fiction bestsellers together

Benjamin Sisko would have Avery Brooks over for dinner, cook him the best meal of his life, and they'd talk animatedly about racial justice until 2am and then say "so, same time next year?"

Kate Mulgrew and Kathryn Janeway would go on a coast-to-coast road trip and take a selfie kissing in front of the world's largest ball of yarn

[tboyautism]

dukat: ah! captian sisko. it seems like you have seized cardassia by the balls once again. if only we were on the same side. cardassia cluld use a man like you

sisko: ah but dukat, cardassia has no balls, on the fact that the federation removed them. you are out numbered out played and outballed. and the question is. what now?

julian in the back of ops (he isnt supposed to be there):

[briscal]

ds9 a plot sisko and worf are forced to weigh the life of a pow over their own

ds9 b plot O'Brien is turned in to a pig human hybrid and forced to dance on a small ball for the entertainment of a godlike alien

[andyoullhearitagain]

Ok come on a journey with me.

So in "Take Me Out To The Holosuite" they all sign this baseball for Sisko, right? And clearly they had all the actors sign the ball for the character (cute) because frankly no prop department would miss the opportunity to use their alien scripts. I'll buy that Worf usually writes his name in Klingon but was like "oh everyone signed in Standard I guess I'll sign in Standard." But even if Quark can write his name in Standard (for business purposes, sure, I'll buy that) I just don't see him drawing the little ears on the Q! Quark isn't afraid of a little whimsy but I think he's just too toxicly masculine to draw a little picture in his signature. And we've seen Ferengi writing and have even seen Quark's name:

(I would have liked it a lot better if the baseball had the alien names in the alien alphabets but w/e)

So either

a. Quark is like, pfft, these aren't real letters, might as well draw a little picture (maybe?)

or

b. Someone who speaks Standard wrote it for him and drew the little ears. But who? Jake? Something to consider.

[marxistgnome]

Heres a few from star treks baseball episode - ds9 take me out to the holosuite

Generally I feel nothing and know nothing of contemporary baseball. However, nothing can compete with the bliss of seeing a fictional character in one of those funny, archaic-looking uniforms. Truly a strange and wonderful cultural object. "Baseball episode" is the best episode trope there is.

Feel free to add your own favorite examples of this. I love to see funny baseball.

[quodo-brainrot]

It's hilarious how unbelievably hostile Odo gets here. He gets BIG ANGY when he's tired.

I kinda wish he wouldn't have interrupted Quark so fast, though, because you can hear Quark start to say "I know I can trust--"

Oh, boy! You know what that means! It's character analysis time!

Trust!? He can trust Odo! Do you have any idea how hard it must be for a Ferengi to even understand the concept of trust? They can't even trust their own family members, let alone unrelated people. And yet Quark trusts the guy who's supposed to be his biggest rival!

And here's the thing - Quark isn't just blowing smoke when he says that. He does trust Odo. A lot. We see it just seconds later when Odo starts roaring at him and he turns his back on Odo and then just stands there.

That's not the behavior of someone who's afraid for their safety. Quark is certainly startled here, but he doesn't believe Odo will actually hurt him. He just waits for Odo to finish his little bitch-fest.

In fact, he almost seems like he's... enjoying it a little?

That kinda looks to me like the smile and gesture of someone who's thinking, 'this is going according to plan.' He's being very patient here, especially when we consider that Odo is being so damn loud. That can't feel too good with those ears, right?

(Or maybe it does. Maybe Quark intentionally initiated a session of 'Thunderous Male Voice Snapping And Snarling In Your Ear ASMR'. You know, to fall asleep to.)

Jokes aside, it does seem like Quark pissed him off on purpose, doesn't it? Quark seems pretty genuine throughout most of this clip except right here, just before he starts to say 'This won't be so bad...'

THAT is an 'I'm up to some Bullshit™' face right there.

So, why did he piss Odo off on purpose? Was it just for the love of the sport? Or was it maybe to help Odo blow off some steam? Some secret third thing?

I think it's 'all of the above.'

I saw a really great post yesterday [link] that points out that Quark is actually rather self-sacrificing, in a sense: he often sets himself up as the bad guy to provoke people into speaking openly about their problems.

So what's Odo's problem here? Well, he's tired, for one. But given how patient Quark is being with him here, I wonder if this was Quark's attempt to show Odo that he lashes out at people way too easily, often assuming the worst of them.

And that is, in fact, something that Odo does - twice - earlier in the episode. He's pissed off that a Starfleet security officer has been brought in to 'coordinate' with him, and in his anger, he slaps away both Sisko and Kira's attempts to help him understand that he's still a valued member of the team.

Does Quark know about that? We don't know, but I think Quark could see that Odo was more on edge than usual, so he did what no one else has the balls lobes to do: He made Odo feel worse.

And that resulted in the most honest exchange Odo has had in the episode so far.

Odo can't yell at Sisko or Kira or any of the other senior staff like this. He can never show them how he really feels. But Quark offers himself up as a punching bag, time and time again, letting Odo unleash the dark, ugly feelings that he can't express anywhere else.

In another episode later in the series, Odo tells Kira that she's the only person who knows the 'real him,' but I'd argue that Quark knows the real Odo, too. Kira brings out the best in him and Quark brings out the worst.

I bet that in his life, Quark has seen enough people like Odo to know that gentle words aren't really going to get through to him until he finally figures some shit out.

Odo doesn't know what to do with the others' attempts at kindness and understanding. (He even literally says to Sisko, 'I don't require your understanding.') He wasn't taught anything about that in his formative years.

He does know what to do with somebody that pisses him off, though. Lashing out at someone was the first conscious action that Odo took in his life, after all.

Odo isn't ready for kindness yet. When others try to show it to him, their words come across to him as meaningless platitudes. And where others offer platitudes, Quark offers catharsis.

The really cool part of this scene is that we actually do see Quark trying kindness at first! But Odo rejects it, physically turning away from Quark the second he says "I understand."

Quark persists. Odo gives that quiet little warning growl. We see a flicker of 'damn, this isn't working' pass over Quark's face.

And then when Quark turns away for a moment, I think we see him make a conscious decision: 'Alright then. Catharsis it is.'

Once again, Quark is Odo's Emotional Support Criminal.

Anyway, I can't leave this post without showing you the funniest fucking frame in this clip:

Eminently captionable frame, if you ask me.

[overseer-picard]

As a real life horse girl, I present:

Starfleet Captains as Different Kinds of Horse Girls

The actual canonical horse girls:

Kirk: The Show Off. Kirk is genuinely a great rider with soft hands and a good seat, but due to this high skill level and his natural disposition, he can be overconfident and do dumb things that result in injury and/or (according to McCoy) death. He loves a flashy horse with high chrome (white markings) to match his own dashing looks.

Picard: The Spiritual. Picard seeks connection with his horse, who he sees as an equal, and hones his skill-set as a rider to maximize this communication. Riding is a relaxing, emotionally cleansing activity for him that centers his mind. He has this quote stamped into his saddle: "When you first meet a horse, his instinct tells him you are a predator. Gain his trust, and you become his protector."

Pike: The Cowboy. Pike's horse is his companion and he rides to reconnect with the past when times were simpler. Not picky with breeds or looks, he’s content with his fuzzy Quarter Horse. He relishes the freedom of open skies and endless plains, the solid earth beneath him keeping him grounded.

NOT canonical horse girls (but could be if they just believed):

Janeway: The Competitor. Dressage, cross country, show jumping, she does them all. Hair slicked back, jodhpurs tight, boots polished, Janeway enters the ring to win. And she does. She chooses horses that have the same fire and intensity that she does and together they are an unbeatable team.

Sisko: The Polo Player. Ball is life, even on a horse. Sisko's team of competitive polo ponies are trained to a tee. He relishes the intensity of the game, the teamwork, and the difficulty of the hand-eye coordination. Winning isn't as important as the thrill of not dying.

Archer: The horseless. Archer is the kid you knew in middle school who was obsessed with horses and knew everything about them but never had one. Instead, he settled with pretending his dog was a horse. I cannot emphasize enough how much this man oozes naive horse girl energy.

Freeman: The Rehabilitator. Freeman rode competitively when she was younger but now has found a great sense of purpose in seeking out the broken and forgotten horses. She focuses on the "dangerous and un-fixable" off-the-track thoroughbreds and rehabilitates them to become their best selves.

*I do not know enough about the various Disco captains to have thoughts on them but Saru has actual horse energy.

[cheesydelphox]

ATTENTION BAJORAN WORKERS

I've come to make an announcement. Benjamin Sisko is a bitchass motherfucker. He pissed on my fucking space station. That's right, he took his Starfleet fucking bald dick out, and he pissed on my fucking space station, and he said his dick was t h i s b i g. And I said "that's disgusting," so I'm making a callout post on my Empok Nor security system. Benjamin Sisko, you got a small dick. It's the size of this starship except way smaller. And guess what? Here's what my dong looks like. That's right, baby, all scales, no pips, no pillows, look at that it looks like two balls and a bottle of kanar. He fucked my space station, so guess what? I'm gonna fuck Bajor, that's right, this is what you get, MY SUPER LASER PISS! Except I'm not gonna piss on Bajor, I'm gonna go higher. I'm pissing on the WORMHOLE. How do you like that, Kai Opaka? I pissed on the wormhole, you idiot! You have twenty-six hours before the piss drrroppllets hit fucking Bajor, now get out of my fucking sight before I piss on you too.

[mayhemthemamp]

The Boimler Boogie is good, but can I offer The Boimler Butt Wiggle?

It's Sisko Wiggle Wednesday

[lostyesterday]

for the ST ask game – either the TNG or Voyager crew and who would be the best to worst at playing baseball in a Take Me Out To the Holosuite style episode

I love this question so I’ll do both!

TNG:

Data: He loves playing games with really specific rules and he has super strong physical abilities. Including him almost feels like cheating though, and he might think so too. I can see him being the umpire like Odo was in DS9. I think he would greatly enjoy that as well.

Guinan: This seems exactly like the kind of random thing she’d be unexpectedly really good at, and she did live on Earth for a long time so it’s entirely possible she’s already played the game and gotten really good at it.

Tasha: Really athletic and competitive and would clearly do well.

Beverly: She’s athletic and a good team player. Baseball doesn’t really seem like her kind of sport, but I still think she’d be very competent at it.

Worf: Technically he was in the DS9 episode, but he’s still a TNG main so I’m ranking him here. He’s pretty good at baseball.

Riker: Another fairly good baseball player, and I could see him getting competitive and taking it very seriously too.

Deanna: I think she’d be a pretty average player, not notably bad or good.

Geordi: He doesn’t seem like he’d be that into sports, plus I’m not sure how accessible baseball would be for him with his visor. As a visually disabled person who has technically attempted to play baseball myself, it’s very hard to play without normal vision. That ball is so tiny and moves so fast. (I made an extremely ill-advised attempt to bat in a school PE class. The ball did not hit me in the face but it was a close thing.) I can see an argument that Geordi’s visor might also be an advantage, though, if he can use it to track things like speed, in which case he’d be much higher on this list.

Wesley: He’d try his best, but he really doesn’t seem like he’d enjoy team sports.

Picard: I cannot picture Picard playing baseball. It’s not even that he’s not athletic, his existence as a character just feels in every way antithetical to the concept of baseball. If TNG had a baseball episode, he would somehow find a way to avoid participating, unless of course he was forced to by Q or something. He would hate it very much.

Voyager:

Janeway: Put in a similar situation as the original DS9 episode, I think Janeway would be just as competitive as Sisko, plus she has strong athletic skills. Baseball doesn’t seem like her kind of sport exactly, but she would make it work.

Chakotay: A sports person and generally athletic. I think he’d have a good time.

Tuvok: He could be good at baseball, the question is whether he would take it seriously. I think if it was framed as a tactical exercise and there was some genuine incentive to beat the other team he would do an extremely competent job.

The Doctor: I had a huge amount of difficult ranking him. In theory, he has the capability of being the best player, but he seems to have little interest in physical hobbies (which makes sense for his character and situation), so I don’t know if he would take it seriously. It might theoretically make sense for him to be the umpire. I do think he would like getting to be the final arbiter of all the rules and yelling at everyone so I think he’d go for it.

B’Elanna: She’d be a fairly competent player, but I don’t think she’d enjoy the game very much. She’s more of a solo sports person.

Harry: Baseball doesn’t seem at all like his kind of thing, but he’d try his best and be fairly decent at it.

Seven: She would claim to find the situation ridiculous but actually become super competitive. She has strong physical abilities, but her real downfall is that she would just be really bad at team sports. She would absolutely get kicked out of the game for breaking the rules.

Tom: I can see Tom liking baseball (it actually makes a lot of sense given his 20th century America obsession), I just don’t think he’d be good at it. I think it might actually be really funny if Tom claimed to be an expert at it and then was just absolutely terrible at actually playing.

Kes: I just don’t think she would be interested.

Neelix: He would try his best, but I think the rules would seem silly to him and he’d have trouble learning all of them and then get kicked out of the game for doing something wrong accidentally.