#since ff7ma is a finished project

[jacquelinemerritt]

Final Fantasy VII: Machinabridged Episode 1 Review

Originally posted on September 11th, 2015

Episode 1

Final Fantasy VII is an incredibly popular and influential game, and a significant portion of its fan base reveres it, commonly claiming that it is the greatest RPG of all time or even that it is the greatest game of all time. So it stands to reason that it’s just the kind of series Team Four Star would want to take down a peg with their perfectly crafted cocktail of irreverent, rapid-fire humor. And this first episode is a comedic treat, reveling in its absurd characters and making sure that everything that can go wrong for them does (and then gets worse).

Their absurd characters are all pretty fantastic, with Takahata101 (in a stroke of genius), making the entirety of AVALANCHE a bunch of obnoxious and dumb kids, with the exceptions being Cloud and Barret, who are still absurd in their own right. Barret comes off as an absurd parody of “Mr. T,” (thanks to Anthony “Antfish” Sardinha) with his trademark “Don’t f*** up” both asserting his authority and demeaning the only one around him that would otherwise be his equal.

Cloud then is played off as an anxious wreck, totally clueless of what he is about to do and what the future has in store for him (capped off with a genuinely creepy hallucination of the voice of Zack, who lends credence to the implication that Cloud might genuinely be unstable).

Finally, Jessie, an otherwise entirely forgettable character, is made into the best character gag of the episode, as a shady root-canal procedure has left her with an incredibly strong lisp that throws even more chaos into the operation.

These great characters are tied together with a common purpose: to blow up the Eco-Friendly Peace Factory (previously known as the Mako Power Plant). And each member except Cloud is perfectly comfortable with this, because they are “eco-terrorists,” or as they would say, people fighting to save the planet.

It’s certainly oddly fitting that the only people we’ve seen who claim to be heroes and are fighting to save the planet are a group of dumb kids managed by an overbearing leader, but it takes a brilliant turn at the end when they’ve blown up the factory and abandon Cloud, because maybe groups trying to save the world are filled with nothing more than obnoxious, inconsiderate assholes. And maybe you’re forced into them anyway.

Rating: 5/5

If you enjoyed this review, consider supporting me on Patreon.

Stray Observations

The naming gag is great, and I look forward to seeing it for the rest of the characters.

Eco-Friendly Peace Factory!

Barret: “There will be an AVALANCHE of Justice!” Cloud: “And how exactly…” Barret: “We’re gonna blow this motha-f**** up.”

The subtitles being in the font from the original game is a very nice touch.

“Don’t f*** up.”