#silly older boys...doing silly older boy things that they probably shouldnt do...

[shortkinglink]

i hope you all know that twi wars and sky are rotating in my mind always

[iamsonyeondone]

lee taeyong as your best friend

so.many.benefits

the first thing that comes to my mind is the food he cooks

you’ll never starve again because taeyong won’t let you. Ever

and he always remembers the ingredients you like or dislike, and the type of food you love or the ingredients that make you want to puke or you’re allergic too

he takes notes of all these things that it still amazes you even though the both of you have been friends for like 5 years

sometimes he even remembers the food you’ve been craving since a week ago and tries to cook it until he gets it just right

and he even makes it look so aesthetic that it probably takes up half your instagram feed because you NEED to hype up your best friend

“yn, can you stop putting embarrassing things as your captions? it’s probably why you’re still single,”

“that was a low blow Ty TraCc. and people love my captions by the way, if i make it too serious it’s gonna make me sound like a soccer mom and that’s not my aesthetic,”

you may or may not also add onto the list of children that taeyong has to look after 

honestly, he probably put it there himself because he’s afraid you’re going to do something dumb and regret it if he’s not there

“for the hundredth time, if you act like ikea’s your home, we’re gonna actually get kicked out this time and i won’t have any other better place to eat meatballs,”

“but you cook them better,”

“that’s really nice of you but Stop Tucking Yourself In, People Are Watching,”

cue taeyong’s dying whale noises when you snuggle into the bed even further

now he can’t even go furniture shopping with you smh

but he also has his embarrassing times to

like that time he was on a sugar rush after eating 3 scoops of ice cream and began dancing in the middle of a supermarket

even though the older ladies were charmed by his looks, you couldnt believe your eyes when he started doing the split in firetruck in front of the crabs

“stop it,,, stop it right now,” you muttered, pulling him by the collar

but he just wouldnt budge :”)

“but i’m communicating with the crabs,”

“more like doing a mating dance now Stop It,”

“you want me to dance to Baby Dont Stop? OKAY”

maybe that was partly to get his revenge on you for embarrassing him in ikea but he wont tell you that or you’ll get him back for it

but even with the silly shenanigans, he doesnt really mind it that much because bickering is the most the both of you do

fights dont really happen unless there’s a huge misunderstanding between the both of you

which only happened like five times and all of them was mostly about the both of you giving each other the silent treatment until either one of you break

and if it was taeyong that broke first, he would make it up to you with an apology and a tight hug as well as making dinner a little more extra for being a shithead

either way, the both of you dont really get into verbal fights and arguments that much 

and although people think arguments make friendships stronger, it doesnt really apply to the both of you

speaking of angsty things, taeyong is one of the best at giving you a shoulder to cry on because he’ll listen to all your worries and whatever you wanted, he’ll give it to you

to sing you to sleep? definitely, even though he gets a little shy

bring you out at 3 am to take a walk or go to the nearest mcdonald’s? dont fret because taeyong would already be at the door, ready and waiting

and he’ll do whatever it takes to cheer you up because he sees you as his sibling 

and anyone messes with you, messes with him :)

and like 11 other boys if it’s really serious oops 

its 11 because taeyong believes the dreamies shouldnt follow in their foot steps and be good children

but if it’s taeyong that needs comforting, you would do above and beyond to help him as well

you would even attempt at cooking his favourite dish if you’re bad at it

if it’s good, it will definitely cheer him up. and if it’s bad, it’ll just make him laugh because he knows you didnt mean to poison him

sometimes taeyong might not tell you his problems all the times, but you would either find out from someone else or the way his small changes in behaviour

its what best friends are for right?

and even if he tries to hide it, he cant really hide his fidgety fingers and wavering eyes. or the eye bags under his eyes and his fatigued actions

you can tell them a part and taeyong is forever grateful when you know without him having to tell you

because sometimes the stress is unexplainable - the kind where it just piles on until he cant handle it anymore and he just needs someone to be there and tell him that everything will be alright

and you’ll do exactly that and more

like secretly bring him to an arcade to play games and also make a fool of yourself when you cant shoot the basketballs through the hoops or when taeyong annihilates you in street fighter

and he’s really thankful for all the little things you do for him and is even more so when you go out of your way for him

and every good cheer up session ends with the both of you at a 24 hour cafe with five different cakes, 2 drinks 

and 3 hour long ranting session that could go from his exhaustion, to parenting, to his dog ruby and maybe to the insects taeyong didnt get to save from a strong breeze

at the end of the day, the both of you would die for each other but never really say it unless induced with alcohol

you guys just know you love each other without needing to say it :>

a/n: i always write these whenever i feel really overwhelmed with writing a lot or planning because i can just type whatever i want without really thinking too much and it’s really therapeutic to me h a h is that weird?? i dont know but i hope you guys liked this one! ps this was dedicated to my sun aka mal iloveyou

[crashgirl111]

umm so i saw my cute boy today and i need HELP and ADVICE im literally my icon and im confused as hell 

(i bolded things for myself to add them up dont fcking worry about it) (or just read those it can be a tldr)

ok first of all. he works at this drive thru taqueria in my hometown i always go to when im not at school. hes always paid progressively more and more attention to me. i think it started my second semester of senior year, and now ive figured out through my #detectivework that he was actually a year behind me in school. i NEVER noticed him at school, i always thought he was a few years older. but now im starting to think he may have been noticing me the whole time, its kinda hard to miss the girl w the huge forehead and also i have nice tits and ass lol. and if he likes shy girls, ive got that and he knew it. he maybe even knew i took ap spanish so that could make him more attracted to me maybe possibly

every time i see him its a lot of intense eye contact that i used to avoid bc it made me nervous, smiling a lot (like his face brightens when he sees me i love it), and theres always just this energy that he HAS to be feeling too. i felt it even before i was that into him.

since ive been in college, every time i come see him hes talking to me a lot. one day i came home (my gps was set to the taquiera lol i miss the food) and he was like “oh i havent seen you lately, good to see u” or whatever and i was like “yeah ive been at school.” then ANOTHER time hes like “oh did u get a new car” (months since hes seen me, so i feel like he shouldnt have noticed that much?? and even commented about it?) and i said yeah and he said it was nice or something. always the same energy, always him lighting up then staring. hes always talking to me each time now, those are just the examples i can think of. teasing me a little bit sometimes, smiling constantly. 

and i have a memory to compare these to. one time i was with my abuser and we came to get rice and beans. i looked a mess, i was just kind of laying back chilling in the passenger seat of my own car. when we got to the window and i saw my boy i got really nervous, bc if my abuser noticed ANYTHING he was gonna hurt him and/or me, probably just me bc hes a weak little bitch who beats up women bc he cant beat up men. he looked at me some, his face was regular didnt brighten up didnt make eye contact w anyone didnt smile the entire time. i felt embarrassed that he was seeing me like that but the next time he was back to just being really sweet to me.

now that im typing this out it seems so silly and unlikely, but ive been noticing these things for a while and just took it as a lil confidence boost, its only very recently in the last few months i got feelings like this. so i dont think its me projecting feelings onto him or anything. and the feeling in the air is so real, he has to feel it too, he fucking creates it. 

TODAY i went and oh man. i heard his voice on the speaker and i was like thank u god and jesus. i always know its him bc he says something really fast in spanish that i cant figure out. im looking good, this is the first time ever i got ready before i came to see him. tits out, lipstick on, hair perfect. i wanted to try to do a lot of things but all i managed was to smile a bit more and watch my posture. i order a coke w my meal even tho i have it at home just so i can ask him to open it for me. i pull up, he lights up as usual, is like “hey!! hows it going” then says “i already opened this is that ok” and i was like “yeah” and like thats kind of sweet right that he already knows? before he opened the window and was getting everything ready, him and this man (probably uncle dad cousin brother idk) were talking, the other guy kept glancing at me and kinda smiling like he knew something. he gives me my food, i give him my card, i think he said something i forget. staring, smiling, energy, the whole thing. while im signing the receipt, hes talking about how i started getting tacos instead of burritos lol, i told him i like both, and i really think he said “i like them more than u” but also i was too nervous to really pay attention but also like what lol thts some awkward thing u say when ur nervous. i hand him the receipt, his voice gets a little deeper/serious/sincere and he said “you have a good night” or "I hope u have a good night" deep eye contact. 

i feel like its real bc i felt it even when i didnt want it to be happening and wasnt interested. the way he makes me feel makes me like him, but how do i know if he acts like that w everyone or its supposed to just be good customer service lmao. so in summary im a crazy delusional narcissistic bitch and i feel things for this boy that i think he might feel for me but i cant be sure. someone PLEASE give me advice/feedback like go on anon and tell me the truth because my sense of reality is so fucked from my ptsd and i need an outsider to tell me what this is and means. i dont wanna like be w him, just for the summer free weed and dick. he has a gf but shes a whole country away and men are generally cheating trash. my next step if i convince myself its real is im gonna add him on fb and be like “oh sorry if this is weird lol u came up in my suggested friends thing” bc we do have 5 mutual friends.

im probably forgetting important things bc in addition to my sense of reality my memory is also fucked. and really im just trying to get fucked here and im waiting for outside clarification to go for it. 

???

[viralhottopics]

X-Plan: Giving Your Kids A Way Out

Friends, as most of you know, I get to spend an hour each week with a group of young people going through addiction recovery. Yes. Young people. Im talking teenagers who are locked away for at least six months as they learn to overcome their addictions. Im always humbled and honored to get this time with these beautiful young souls that have been so incredibly assaulted by a world they have yet to understand. This also comes with the bittersweet knowledge that these kids still have a fighting chance while several of my friends have already had to bury their own children.

Recently I asked these kids a simple question: How many of you have found yourself in situations where things started happening that you werent comfortable with, but you stuck around, mainly because you felt like you didnt have a way out?

They all raised their hands.

Every single one of them.

In the spirit of transparency I get it. Though in my mid-40s, Im still in touch with that awkward boy who often felt trapped in the unpredictable currents of teenage experiences. I cant count the times sex, drugs, and alcohol came rushing into my young world; I wasnt ready for any of it, but I didnt know how to escape and, at the same time, not castrate myself socially. I still recall my first time drinking beer at a friends house in junior high schoolI hated it, but I felt cornered. As an adult, that now seems silly, but it was my reality at the time. Peer pressure was a frivolous term for an often silent but very real thing; and I certainly couldnt call my parents and ask them to rescue me. I wasnt supposed to be there in the first place. As a teen, forcing down alcohol seemed a whole lot easier than offering myself up for punishment, endless nagging and interrogation, and the potential end of freedom as I knew it.

X-Plan

www.BertFulks.com

For these reasons, we now have something called the X-plan in our family. This simple, but powerful tool is a lifeline that our kids are free to use at any time. Heres how it works:

Lets say that my youngest, Danny, gets dropped off at a party. If anything about the situation makes him uncomfortable, all he has to do is text the letter X to any of us (his mother, me, his older brother or sister). The one who receives the text has a very basic script to follow. Within a few minutes, they call Dannys phone. When he answers, the conversation goes like this:

Hello?

Danny, somethings come up and I have to come get you right now.

What happened?

Ill tell you when I get there. Be ready to leave in five minutes. Im on my way.

At that point, Danny tells his friends that somethings happened at home, someone is coming to get him, and he has to leave.

In short, Danny knows he has a way out; at the same time, theres no pressure on him to open himself to any social ridicule. He has the freedom to protect himself while continuing to grow and learn to navigate his world.

www.BertFulks.com

This is one of the most loving things weve ever given him, and it offers him a sense of security and confidence in a world that tends to beat our young people into submission.

However, theres one critical component to the X-plan: Once hes been extracted from the trenches, Danny knows that he can tell us as much or as little as he wants but its completely up to him. The X-plan comes with the agreement that we will pass no judgments and ask no questions (even if he is 10 miles away from where hes supposed to be). This can be a hard thing for some parents (admit it, some of us are complete control-freaks); but I promise it might not only save them, but it will go a long way in building trust between you and your kid.

(One caveat here is that Danny knows if someone is in danger, he has a moral obligation to speak up for their protection, no matter what it may cost him personally. Thats part of the lesson we try to teach our kidswe are our brothers keeper, and sometimes we have to stand for those too weak to stand for themselves. Beyond that, he doesnt have to say a word to us. Ever.)

For many of us parents, we lament the intrusion of technology into our relationships. I hate seeing people sit down to dinner together and then proceed to stare into their phones. It drives me nuts when my kids text me from another room in our house. However, cell phones arent going away so we need to find ways to use this technology to help our kids in any way we can.

Since first publishing this on my personal site, Ive seen an incredible amount of discussion about the pros and cons. Here are some of the questions folks have had:

Doesnt this encourage dishonesty?

Absolutely not. It actually presents an opportunity for you as a parent to teach your kids that they can be honest (something DID come up, and they DO have to leave), while learning that its okay to be guarded in what they reveal to others. They dont owe anyone an explanation the next day, and if asked can give the honest answer, Its private and I dont want to talk about it. Boom! Another chance for a social skill life-lesson from Mom and Dad.

Does this cripple a kid socially instead of teaching them to stand up to others?

I know plenty of adults who struggle to stand up to others. This simply gives your kid a safe way out as you continue to nurture that valuable skill.

What if this becomes habitual?

If youre regularly rescuing your kid, hopefully your family is having some conversations about that.

If you dont talk about it or ask questions, how do they learn?

If youre building a relationship of trust with your kids, theyll probably be the ones to start the conversation. More importantly, most of these conversations need to take place on the FRONT-side of events. Ever taken a cruise? They all make you go through the safety briefing in case the boat sinks. They dont wait until the ships on fire to start telling you about the lifeboats. Talk with them. Let your kids ask questions and give them frank answers.

If theyre not where theyre supposed to be, shouldnt there be consequences?

Lets be honest. A kid in fear of punishment is a lot less likely to reach out for help when the world comes at them. Admitting that theyre in over their heads is a pretty big life lesson all by itself. However, dont get so caught up in all of the details. This isnt a one-size-fits-all scheme. Every parent, every kid, and every situation is unique. What it might look like in your family could be totally different from mineand thats okay.

I urge you to use some form of an X-plan in your home. If you honor it, your kids will thank you for it. You never know when something so simple could be the difference between your kid laughing with you at the dinner table or spending six months in a recovery center or (God forbid) something far worse.

At the end of the day, however, the most important thing is that youre having some open, honest discussions with your kids. Keep building a relationship of trust. This isnt the same world we grew up in. Its not like sneaking a beer at Billys house anymore. Our kids face things on a daily basis thatgiven one bad decisioncan be fatal. Dont believe me? Ive been to funerals for great kids from awesome families.

Friends, its a dangerous world. And our kids are out in it everyday.

Prayers for strength and compassion to the parents out there as we all try to figure out this parenting gigit never gets easy.

Please share this piece. Talk about it with your kids. If this somehow gives just one kid a way out of a bad situation, we can all feel privileged to have been a part of that.

#xplan

Blessings, friends.

This piece originally appeared on www.BertFulks.com

Read more: http://huff.to/2m6fsLP

from X-Plan: Giving Your Kids A Way Out

[sour-glass]

no one asks me anything bc im kinda inactive and unknown so imma jus do it anyway??? ok height: 5'4 virgin? no shoe size: 8.5 usually but it depends do u smoke??? smoke what??? jk ya i shmoke do u drink??? no unless its offered to me/theres wine do u take drugs/?? not usually but im tryna get some shrooms or acid soon age u get mistaken for? 17-30 :/ got any tattoos?? no im a wimp with a low pain tolerance want any tattoos??? ya maybe someday when im not a weak ass anymore piercings?? jus my ears want any piercings?? ya id like a nose ring but probably a septum jus bc i can tuck it up for work best friend?? i guess my boyfriend since i see him the most. i love him relationship status?? we in love turn on? neck kisses turn off: smelly beards favorite movie???? fuck idk i remember i really liked daydream nation back in the day but idk if i would still like it as much now. probably apocolypto or the room ill love u if?? u pay my bills honey someone u miss?? my friends in midland. i remember having a good time with them it was so pure most traumatic experience?? my childhood/relationship with my dad what i hate most about myself: my inability to express myself creatively. i got so many ideas and no skills to do anything w them what i love most bout myself: my attitude. its helped me get thru some weird shit, im still here what i want to be when im older?? an entrepreneur of some sort or an artist pioneer of an artform that hasnt been created yet or a therapist maybe. i can listen relationship w my sibling: we're cool, got each others back, but she dont know her place sometimes. hopefully im a mentor to her in some way relationship w my parents: mom- my rock, always there when i need her, but is annoyingly frugal. dad- nonexistent, helped me get set up with a car, keeps trying to see me ideal perfect date: plan something, it falls thru, and we end up doing some other shit thats a lot more fun, then we fuck ourselves to sleep :~) biggest pet peeves: ppl sneezing/coughing without even trying to cover themselves, boogers in my nose in a setting where its inappropriate for me to pick it, untied shoelaces, seeing a really juicy pimple and not being able to pop it description of the boy/girl i like: well hes caring and silly, corny, sweet. he likes video games, making beats, weed, pokemon cards, and memes a reason ive lied to a friend: i didnt actually have errands to run, ive jus got mad social anxiety and can only hang out in small does im sry what i hate most about work/school (work): the mean customers, the bullying from coworkers, only having one day off (up until next week boiiiii) last text message says: "ya i jus thought since im waking up early i shouldnt go to the gym" (excuses) what words upset me the most: annoying, shut up, leave what words make me feel the best about myself: this one is confusing what i find attractive in women: hair, ass, nipples what i find attractive in men: hair, beard, nipples, lips where i would like to live: im not sure if of the actual destination, but id like to live somewhere where theres a small amount of children, in a town where no one cared if i wore my pjs to the store in the afternoon, where art is everwhere, weed is legal maybe? cats everywhere one of my insecurities: loaded question but ok -- my face. i feel like i have a weird face and dont look like a average person, but i think everyone probably feels like that .. right my childhood career choice: actress/singer ofc, then a lawyer favorite icecream flavor: cappucino chocolate chunk from braums who i wish i could be: amy winehouse, rihanna, kali uchis,grimes where i want to be right now: with jake the last thing i ate: peanut m&ms sexiest person that comes to my mind immediately: salma hayek random fact about anything: anything i say here feels unnatural so pass