#silly lil mermaids

[fitzs-space]

Lets play mermaids they said, it'd be FUN they said

I tried to finish this for may, its here now. happy pride gay people

transcript down there

Gem: Are you guys even able to breathe in water like this?

Etho: No, it’s really just aesthetics,

Etho: but there’s enough conduits around here, so it’s safe enough- Grian: ACHHHJJHJHUUUHIUFUCK

[grian witnessed the horrors]

[rainynightmoonlight]

Bonita!

Y/n: Do you or do you not feel bonita? *Sits patiently, kicking their legs in anticipation after taking away the makeup brush from Leona's face*

Leona: *stares at Y/n and speaks with a flat tone* I feel bonita.

Y/n: *giggling and stimming from happiness* Wonderful! Cause you look bonita!!! *Starts laughing and taking pictures of Leona*

Leona: *smiles softly, content being with Y/n* You're the only one who gets to do this with me.

Y/n: *nods and smiles, still taking pictures of Leona*

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s2 episode 20 thoughts

oh man! i really loved this episode. no aliens, no overarching plot, just some silly shenanigans and yeah, some murder, but in a far more lighthearted fashion than in other cases. filler episodes i love you soooo much <3

from the beginning, i thought the prompt sounded really good... shoutout to people who work in sideshows and other touring entertainment industries, y’all are real for that 

we open with some kids laughing under a full moon… nothing could be scarier… except SOMEONE WATCHING THEM!

and whoever it is, they are approaching the pool with feet out. where are their parents to safeguard them from stranger danger, i ask into my screen!

OH he is the dad!! what was once scary has now turned heartwarming. he splashes about in the pool with them and says they need to get ready for bed. aww. 

BUT NOW SOMEONE IS WATCHING HIM IN THE POOL!! NOOO the heartwarming session HAS BEEN CANCELLED... is he being EATEN???

(as he is killed, the camera shows a van with the words “alligator man” on it... at first i'm thinking that the alligator man was the creature who just Ate this guy, but turns out the father WAS alligator man, so named for his skin condition. rest in peace mister alligator, the world is a worse place for ur loss)

and now the agents are looking into his murder :(

(also, in the opening credits, we see that one of the guest stars is named “the enigma”... I’ll have to look into their work)

mulder says there have been a lot of murders in this fashion over the last 28 years, and they have been going all over the country!!! it seems to involve some sort of round bite mark. must be time to go investigate.

they roll up the the alligator man's funeral. honestly it is sad! and we see that the widow slash mother of the kids is a bearded lady and she is absolutely serving but this is a very sorrow-filled moment for them all

and interrupting the moment in which his community remembers the warmth he brought to their town, his casket starts moving… and someone emerges from the ground… and stabs himself in the chest with a spike???? HUH???

so the deceased was an escape artist but was forced into the sideshow circuit because of his skin condition… scully says she didn’t know sideshows were still a thing… which is honestly fair because it is a very vintage sort of entertainment. and they have a Not So Great history.

BUT if the people who live in this town in the summer are all traveling performers.. and if they have been touring for years... and the murders go on for years… hmm, it seems things are starting to add up

mulder notices a drawing of a creature on the menu of the restaurant they are sitting in, and he asks who drew it. why, the sheriff says, it's the artist named hepcat, of course! cut to him tending to his freaky mermaid. he describes his scary maze business as “a tabernacle of terror” 

mulder asks what the drawing on the menu was, and i was thinking, hmm, looks like the fiji mermaid, and hepcat says it is the fiji mermaid, and mulder doesn't seem to recognize it?? i assume this is one of those situations where he acts like he doesn't know what is going on to get more information because i feel like that is Exactly the sort of thing he has read about at length. like i had him pegged as a guy who could write a dissertation on the subject at the drop of a hat. so i think he's lying but narrative wise it isn't fully revealed. 

scully: “what’s the fiji mermaid?” hepcat: “it’s the fiji mermaid!” <- thanks this clears up a lot <3

mulder is acting surprised to hear that the top half of the fiji mermaid was a monkey, which i again assume to be an act? but he says that the tracks at the murder look monkey-ish. so perhaps there is a correlation...? between the very active murder case and that time PT barnum sewed a monkey and a fish together? hey, the dots aren't connecting for me, but i don't work for the fbi so what do i know

they go to get a place to stay and the guy operating the rental place, a kind and verbose fellow with dwarfism named mr. nutt, gives them their keys. and mulder asks if had worked in the circus, (and since everyone they have met so far has in fact done so, i feel that this was a fair question, but maybe i also deserved what follows), and mr. nutt really lays into him about making judgements, and maybe some people with dwarfism want to manage hotels...

and as all of this goes down scully just observes. wow. she let him flounder. lmao.

the man carrying their bags is named lanny, and he has a conjoined twin sort of situation, it's not entirely clear- but he says mr. nutt got him to work there because he believed it was undignified to work in the circus. hmm.

back to hepcat at his studio… listening to some groovy music... and something crawls in his window… looking like the fiji mermaid. and it BITES him.

next morning. mulder going for a jog. in a sweatshirt and sweatpants in florida heat. what in the hell was he thinking??? let’s analyze that while a man chomping a fish emerges from the river. we receive no real clarification on what is going on in either of their minds.

scully in bed. alerted to a murder by lanny. still in a robe. we get a shot of her chest and also lanny's brother that felt mutually uncomfortable. SMH no rest for her!

okay, examining the scene of the murder. mulder notices some blood on a little window and WHY DID HE TOUCH THE BLOOD NASTY!!!! NASTY!!!

they deduce that to fit in the window, the suspect would have to be a contortionist…. and they walk out to see a contortionist. it’s the spike guy that so disrespectfully ruined the funeral!!

he puts a nail up his nose in front them. and mulder pulls the nail out. probably to get some blood. not an easy watch still.

we learn here that the guy with the puzzle tattoos who was eating the fish in the river earlier is called “The Conundrum”, and the spike guy slash contortionist is dr. blockhead

dr. blockhead gives the conundrum a bunch of crickets and he gulps them up; then he offers crickets to the agents and scully TAKES one, says thanks, eats it, and leaves LMAOOO????? never let them guess your next move....

mulder is staring at her trying to figure out if he is in love with a woman that just ate a cricket and if this is something she does regularly and JUST KIDDING!!! she didn't eat it silly!!! she "reveals" the lil cricket behind mulder’s ear awww... her uncle was a magician <3

(he also does a lil slight of hand trick and pulls out the bloody nail, saying "everyone's uncle was an amateur magician", which i am sure they can bond over at a later date)

scully goes to a museum that says "freaks free, everyone else leave a donation" and she puts in some money… publicly declared non-freak 

this guy at the museum is touching her. don’t care for that. but I like that he knows lots of random information. and he won’t show his whole face, we as the audience only see him through mirrors. very cool framing device.

he says he will take her back and show her something of barnum’s for another $5 and sworn secrecy. good luck bucko; last time she was told to keep a secret (affair baby) the SECOND she was reunited with mulder the tea had been spilled LMAOOO. he hands her a paper featuring jim jim the dog faced boy, who, dare i say it, seems to be a king.

he leads her into the back rooms… scary. but her trench coat is serving though

okay, deep in the back is a trunk. and it’s empty and opens an exit door. NOOO she was scammed! it’s all part of the hustle. 

(well, that is what i THOUGHT, at least, until she realizes it leads to the sheriff's house, and things are adding up...)

mulder sees something crawling about. it’s the guy who owns the rental space, mr. nutt, under scully's trailer! he asks why he is under there and mr. nutt says he is NOT being creepy. mulder flirts with the man and he runs away LMAO... weaponized bisexuality 

agents are in the trailer having a nerd off and it’s not clear who is winning and there is romantic tension. sheriff hamilton used to be jim jim the dog faced boy???? what a reveal!!!

we are watching them watch the sheriff dig a hole during a full moon. average agent bonding activities. he buried something in the ground and goes inside. 

they are in his yard digging up what he was just digging and mulder has taken his earlier roasting to heart and says “we’re being highly discriminatory here” and clarifies that’s no reason to suspect him of being a werewolf and it’s like well. i don’t know that we both thought he was a werewolf. they pause to consider the moral weight of their actions then keep going.

uh oh! sheriff catches them!!! not a good look being caught digging something up. “We’re exhuming… your potato” is the best line that usually quick-tongued mulder could come up with, which had me losing my MIND and i proceeded to write a very long keysmash to express my amusement

“may I ask why?” (she starts monologing about serial killers taking positions in law enforcement and needing to monitor him as as suspect, and it’s convincing) (he cuts in: “we found out you used to be a dog-faced boy” STOP THIS IS SOOOO FUNNY) and she looks soooooo guilty!!

he doesn’t deny it and says he started balding on his head which put him out of a job. fair enough, gotta pay the bills.

next genius dialogue exchange: “that doesn’t explain the potato” “I got some warts on my hand” “...that doesn’t quite explain the potato” 

(i kept having to pause in rapid succession to write these lines down because i was laughing SO hard)

has anyone thought that maybe a man wants to bury a potato in his yard in peace…. like that’s how we get more potatoes…

“to get rid of warts you rub a sliced potato on your hand and bury it under a full moon” <- new life hack just dropped!!

nooooooo the conundrum is chasing the dog… dog escaped. everyone is pleased. he brings a check to mr. nutt and it’s rent!! king of paying his bills on time. but dog is still barking... NOOOOO MERMAID ATTACK ON MR. NUTT!!!

someone with bloody hands bursts into scully’s room and she must have her gun right by her pillow, and she gets it so fast, but it’s just lanny, saying he found mr. nutt dead... they truly hate to see a hard working entrepreneur in the field of hospitality winning 

the pin at the scene looked like something from dr. blockhead, so they go to his house to investigate and he is full of hooks. i made a noise like whAUUUWAUUHWAUH and mulder is looking intensely at what's going on there. blockhead goes on some cultural appropriation bs. um sir this is weird timing bur you are under arrest.

he gets out of the handcuffs- contortionist and escape artist! but the sheriff catches him by the hooks. what a KING! shoutout to this sheriff, formerly jim jim the dog faced boy, can we add him to the team? skinner are you hiring?  

just as our agents apprehend their suspect, we see that the mermaid creature is in the room with lanny!!! but... he isn't hurt?

OMG the twin inside him IS THE MERMAID??

lanny confesses to this when he asks how it would be possible to turn his "brother" in without turning himself in...and he thinks the mermaid fellow hates him and is looking for another brother which is so SAD but he says he’ll come back

is anyone concerned about the twin crawling out of lanny? well, mulder knows he isn't the man in charge here: “scully, you’re the medical expert… I believe you” yessir it's good to remember that!

the mermaid brother appears to have run off into the "tabernacle of terror" and mulder trying to hold a little evil mermaid at gunpoint is SO comical

their asses are lost in the maze!!! scully pulls a gun on a rubber skeleton that fell from the ceiling!

she's trapped in a mirror room to serve infinite looks in all directions, and it looks like mermaid baby is caught... she fires.. but it hits the mirror!! baby mermaid brother escaped!!!

at this moment, mulder slides through a trapdoor... and it was SO funny pls tell me there's a gif set of that somewhere because i need it...

baby on the loose... bad news!!! conundrum is being eaten by the baby twin…. but what if he eats him FIRST, i ask myself, and received an answer in the form of baby being gone and conundrum rubbing his stomach!!!! yassss!!! diva down!!!

the next morning, while everyone is searching for mermaid brother, we learn lanny died that evening of a condition related to alcoholism. we learn this while dr. blockhead and the conundrum are getting ready to leave.

and dr. blockhead's going on about the future, and how nature needs freaks, and in the 21st century everyone will look perfect… "just like him" (points to Mulder majestically posing by a trailer) LMAOOOOOO “imagine going through your whole life looking like that!!!” <- yeah it must be really hard....... /s

at last, conundrum and blockhead are taking off into the great unknown... scully points out he doesn't look too good…. CONUNDRUM TALKS???? “probably something I ate", he says. LMAOOO his voice is sooo normal 😭😭😭

this episode had me laughing. we really had it all: exhuming a potato, scully's valiant attempts at lying, mulder hitting on a guy, lessons in ableism and judgement, a man who eats crickets and fish, flirting over case details, a dog, scully doing magic, mulder running in the florida heat dressed like it was a new england winter. truly i have nothing that could be added.

and did i have a secret evil mermaid twin on my list of probably monsters of the week? no, i cannot say that i did! was it the most compelling or scary of creatures? not really! but i was filled with whimsy. cannibalism saved the day. an excellent episode, and a perfect contrast to earlier in the season when scully was literally About To Die and i was crying a lot over the whole thing. ah, the duality of TV shows!

[8-xnny]

[lonely-north-star]

number 2 from your ramblings in your notes!!!!!

here’s to hoping we get motivation to finish our wips………..

🙏 desperately hoping for for both of us

y'all are about to learn so much about me ajwjefj, I've been thinking so much about this damn necklace and how I want it to appear in every lifetime they meet. Mammon is always the one to gift it to my MC, Paula

okay number two is mermaid mc and Mammon as the Captain and Solomon as a crew mate !!! Some random pirate caught a glimpse of her, and tried catching her, but it did NOT end well (imagine she sunk their ship lol). Now she has a bounty on her head LMAO

(this got way long so more under the cut)

SO of course the two of them find out about this while visiting the nearby town to get supplies, and they're both devising a plan to catch her. That prize money is hefty AND they'd get bragging rights

So of course they're out, and people catch the most glimpses of her during the night. I need to come up with a design for her actually - definitely a blue tail ??

ANYWAY they're staying up multiple nights to even see her, and one night they do, and they're using a net to try and grab her. She'd definitely taunt them. I'd like to imagine Mammon gets so pissed off at the taunting, he actually jumps into the water to try and grab her. Solomon is so concerned. All Paula does is laugh and swim away.

Wait imagine they're tight on money and they try fishing, but Paula keeps shooing any animals away. Just to annoy them. And they see her and catch on. But y'know what they also see? How she's decked out in random jewelry and shiny chains. Treasures she's found ?? So they start thinking they can bribe her !!

They offer some random jewel in exchange for her not messing with their catch. Or maybe human things interest her ?? Ooh, a hair comb actually !! Unfortunately, she is convinced, as wary as she is. Maybe she even brings like- plants? To try and get them to not fish so much?

Somewhere between this she starts popping out during the day, trading and talking with them, but always from afar. She sometimes swims closer but another crew member will always spook her.

Maybe solomams find a rock to sit on?? To make her less afraid?? They show off they have no weapons, no nothing, and they actually get to see her up close. And wow. She's pretty.

Now they're like "damn fuck the reward we want her instead!" HAHAHA

They all get closer <3 i like to think at some point later, Mammon gifts her THE necklace (the diamond shaped one my MC always wears). And !?? Surprise, surprise, it's magic and turns her human !!! (Not my love for barbie and h20 showing, sorry guys HAHA)

It'd be sooo cute if they have to carry her everywhere while she learns to walk and have legs. But they're in shock. All of them are. But she definitely joins their crew !!

Angst would be she gets kidnapped because someone recognized her from the bounty and solomams have to save her !! God I can't even imagine, they'd beat everyone up to get to her. I love that for them.

HAHA SORRY FOR RAMBLING FOR SO LONG, I NEED TO COMPILE THESE INTO A DOC OR SOMETHING. I wanted to expand on them ajwjwje

[benetnvsch]

what if we were fucked up creatures but we were in love?

[spyderschaos]

Last page in this sketchbook!!!!

[happi-dreams]

Who would be Plankton in the Smiling Critters Pants?

It just fits quite well :D

[justanotherfanfolks]

Turns out I think the Tweels are actually really neat!

...

ARRGGHHHHHHH!!!

[cosmicheartz]

Ngl the fact Psychonauts fans and Detective Grimoire fans sorta overlap is rlly funny

[dbphantom]

fuck it silly mermaids hour

[imakestupidthingsandsharethem]

Shark.. shark lady

[maisartworksstuff]

βմէ ҽѵҽղ ąʂ ʂօօղ ąʂ ʂհҽ ցօէ հҽɾ Ӏҽցʂ, էհҽ ʍҽɾʍąìժ ҟҽքէ աąէçհìղց էհҽ ʍąղ ƒɾօʍ ąƒąɾ Ӏìҟҽ ղąմցհէ հąժ ҽѵҽղ çհąղցҽժ

[rainynightmoonlight]

guys writers block has its grip tight around my throat. It wont leave me alonee

[thenookspace]

Adding on to this bc the au lives rent free and is brushing narrative crumbs onto my couch: LONG POST AHOY

mentioned in the tags of the last post that the jedi in this au are a sorta organised community of sirens but it's still undecided on how the jedi transform from taily scaley hypercarnivorous fishy horrors but for now it's a spell/potion or other ocean magic bs which - for Plot Reasons - has a distinct 12 hour time limit and reset period

meaning that all jedi have a day/night to break it down human style before they have to haul their fishy asses back to the sea before they turn into sea foam or get fish-outed and put everyone in danger

that being said, the jedi that do go to shore absolutely get up to the most wacky not-possible-in-the-sea human bullshit ever

for instance: Mace Windu uses Surface Time to become an underground musical theatre star

Plo Koon somehow has a fully legitimate pilot's licence despite not knowing shit about everything that comes before the certificate-of-flying-deathcraft (he takes his buddies up for joyrides and nobody questions how he flies the aircraft or even if he actually owns the damn thing)

Kit Fisto doesn't like being on land (something something "public" something something "indecency") but he's friends with the local cave diving team

Yoda surfaces out of the Midnight Zone mostly to beat the shit out of seabirds

Anakin "secretly" visits Padme whenever Leg Day rolls around bc the doofus assumed that human-siren relationships were forbidden (not if your human can keep their mouth shut!)

he usually vents to his ol' friend Palpatine who "accidentally" saw him transforming one night but has just been so supportive ever since! absolutely no bad intentions! not even a whiff of "bulldoze the town to build a research facility filled with kidnapped sirens who he'll find by promising Anakin that the Horrible Vivisections will find a way for him to be with Padme forever" on him!! just a trustworthy old town mayor doing town mayor things!

(forewarning: nothing too awful happens in this au due to Fox&Padme lawyer shenanigans and my own inability to make sad endings)

meanwhile, for those who have legs

couldn't decide whether the mandatory Fett Family Business is a music shop - think vinyls, strings, guitars and One Lone Piano in the corner that Nobody is allowed to play (it was Jaster's) - or a myriad of various Ocean Things and decided to fuck it all and do both bc when you have that many brothers/half-brothers/cousins/family friends/family friend's kids/people you aren't sure about but are probably related to/people who definitely aren't related to you but just won't fuck off, you have options

eg, Monnk is def on the aforementioned cave diving team (he's 500% Kit's supplier for Weird Human Shit)

Wolffe and the Pack are in maritime search&rescue (they taught Plo how to fly thinking it would be funny until he fuckin adopted them)

Alpha 17 is the local lighthouse keeper who just wants the bloody sea raccoons (Very Curious sirens that he gives Very Few Shits about) to get out of his trash

and Fox is underpaid overworked mayor's aide who would've fucked off to the lighthouse already if he didn't know that Palpatine would flatten everyone if Fox wasn't there to 'forget' the contact details of every major land developer in the area

@cosmic-j0ke speculated that Jango might already know about the sirens bc of a tragic accident years ago and due to that being a fucking fantastic point it's 100% canon to the au now everybody give them a round of applause

the incident in question involved the disappearance/deaths of Jaster and the crew of Jaster's fishing vessel off the coast of Galidraan that left Jango obsessed with hunting "sirens" that everybody assumes were figments of a traumatised child's imagination

Dooku swore up and down he had acted in self-defense but was still banished from any jedi territories after he rescued and returned the deliriously dehydrated human boy he had found in the hold

was also kinda conflicted about whether Jango should still be obsessed with sirens to the detriment of Everyone but then I remembered that this is a literary cotton ball so Jango gets to mellow out on the mer-murdering after a while due to the stress of raising a metric assload of kids

+ all the niblings/little cousins/people you hired to help you hunt sirens who stuck around/their kids/ etc

but not before getting really into music engineering in an attempt to reverse engineer siren song

which becomes a surprisingly handy party trick when starting a music shop

fast forward to present day Cody mostly runs the music shop due to being the only one actually interested in dealing with People on Land all day long

he occasionally sprinkles in some lifeguarding because it's easy money to babysit a town of people who were all swimming before they could walk

but he has a Problem

the younger Fett & co kids have been kicking up a storm lately about learning the piano and getting curious about Jaster's Piano (dun dun dun) that Cody and the others never learned to play over the course of their Very Different childhoods (that will definitely never become an emotional plot point ahaha)

(not sure where tf any ''younger members" of the Fett extended family network would come from or even which characters they are - Boba and Omega are easy options, Omega is Hunter's kid no muss no fuss but Boba is a difficult one considering that Jango is theoretically too old for young kids in this au if Cody, Rex, Wolffe, Fox and co are all adults, will need some help here)

mystery child origins aside the kids are too young to be at sea so they're stuck with Cody and his soft heart in the shop when they start getting big piano-based ideas

ofc after folding like a house of cards and cursing out the kids' new preference for keys instead of string instruments like Good and Reasonable Fetts, Cody goes looking for a piano tutor and bargain deals on cheap eBay keyboards (he won't touch Jaster's piano bc that hurt is more a family heirloom than the instrument itself)

the keyboards are easy to get a hold of aside from exorbitant shipping prices (the irony), but a tutor willing to brave Jango??? might as well mail a craigslist ad to the bottom of the fucking ocean

so Cody's seriously considering pulling an Alpha 17 and fucking off to the lighthouse or sucking it up and learning piano (Alexa play Surface Pressure)

until he's lifeguarding (read: stress napping) one day and wakes to the most ~enchanting~ song from a nearby busker (he's dressed like a forlorn english professor who forgot the memo about pants but oh boy is he Beautiful), who's playing the most decrepit, water-damaged nasty looking keyboard Cody's ever seen

(Obi-wan found it in the Human Waste Box and he's incredibly proud of all the magic/non-magic modifications, he put those barnacles there himself!)

half an hour and one job offer later the tourist (???) is following Cody back to the shop and lessons are going swimmingly (HA)

obv Obi-wan has no idea how to actually play the keyboard, much less teach anyone anything but Seabed Radio's 40 Hottest Whale Songs but the kids are having enough fun to stop them snitching and Cody has conked out from post-Task adrenaline crash and could not care less about the gorgeous man in his shop teaching his little siblings piano (but he will!)

Jango, however, immediately clocks Obi-Wan as a Fish and spends the entire time seething at Obi-wan's very obvious siren-ness, Cody's obliviousness to Obi-wan's very obvious siren-nessand everyone else's wilful ignorance to Obi-wan's very obvious siren-ness bc he makes Cody happy and Jango's conniptions are funny

this is the end for now bc tumblr text limit hates me but next on the agenda: the actual fucking Plot!

God fucking damnit I misread sith Obi-wan as siren Obi-wan ONCE and now I have THOUGHTS about small town siren Obi-wan disguising himself as an eccentric music tutor/boardwalk busker to explore the ~human world~

[contradictivs]

I think that ryder would 100% play mermaids if asked when at the beach/pool <3