#signed an adam kinnie with pre-symptoms of bpd

[ainosukes-sadism]

Okay so one of my mutuals made a post a week or something ago about how people view ADAM's connection with Langa as him having romantic feelings, while it is actually Langa being ADAM's special person, a phenomenon common to those with Borderline Personality Disorder. But a lot of people on this site don't really understand BPD (which is understandable, it's a stigmatized disorder not really talked about in terms other than 'yandere disorder'), so here's an analysis on how ADAM fits the criteria, and what they are.

Cut because length. tw for discussions of trauma, suicide & suicidal ideation, and self-harm, and mentions of drugs.

First off, Borderline Personality Disorder is a cluster b personality disorder (which all have trauma as a major contributor to getting the disorder). If I were to put one word to it, I would pick "disconnect". Disconnect from identity (not knowing who you are), disconnect from your emotions (not feeling them, or not being able to regulate or control them), disconnect from people (having difficulty keeping long-term connections with people, but also have difficulty letting go of connections). People with borderline often had unstable childhoods, which left them disconnected from their true selves (that weren't molded by those around them from a young age) and the world around them.

There are 9 main criteria of Borderline Personality Disorder, and a person needs 5 to have the disorder. They also need to be 18 to be diagnosed, although symptoms usually start in adolescence.

List of criteria was pulled from here. There's some more info, so I recommend reading if this post interests you.

1. Fear of abandonment. People with BPD are often terrified of being abandoned or left alone. Even something as innocuous as a loved one arriving home late from work or going away for the weekend may trigger intense fear. This can prompt frantic efforts to keep the other person close. You may beg, cling, start fights, track your loved one’s movements, or even physically block the person from leaving. Unfortunately, this behavior tends to have the opposite effect—driving others away.

~Adam doesn't seem to present this symptom.

2. Unstable relationships. People with BPD tend to have relationships that are intense and short-lived. You may fall in love quickly, believing that each new person is the one who will make you feel whole, only to be quickly disappointed. Your relationships either seem perfect or horrible, without any middle ground. Your lovers, friends, or family members may feel like they have emotional whiplash as a result of your rapid swings from idealization to devaluation, anger, and hate.

~If his relationship with Tadashi doesn't prove it I don't know what does. He goes from loving Tadashi as a child and teen, to thinking Tadashi is his worst enemy a moment later, to trusting him more then anyone, to hating him again, to loving Tadashi again (Tadashi doesn't seem to mind the instability, but you can't deny it's there).

3. Unclear or shifting self-image. When you have BPD, your sense of self is typically unstable. Sometimes you may feel good about yourself, but other times you hate yourself, or even view yourself as evil. You probably don’t have a clear idea of who you are or what you want in life. As a result, you may frequently change jobs, friends, lovers, religion, values, goals, or even sexual identity.

~It isn't super clear who Adam is himself. As Ainosuke, he's just a puppet of his aunts'. At S, he's letting loose all the subconscious pain he has. We get a glimpse into it at the end of the finale, but it isn't clear who Adam really is yet, and he might not know either. So it's a possible symptom, but one we can't say for certain given that we can't read his mind.

4. Impulsive, self-destructive behaviors. If you have BPD, you may engage in harmful, sensation-seeking behaviors, especially when you’re upset. You may impulsively spend money you can’t afford, binge eat, drive recklessly, shoplift, engage in risky sex, or overdo it with drugs or alcohol. These risky behaviors may help you feel better in the moment, but they hurt you and those around you over the long-term.

~Just. Everything he does at S is reckless and self destructive. He hurts the people trying to help him, he risks killing himself just to maybe feel something, there's no way he doesn't fit this symptom.

5. Self-harm. Suicidal behavior and deliberate self-harm is common in people with BPD. Suicidal behavior includes thinking about suicide, making suicidal gestures or threats, or actually carrying out a suicide attempt. Self-harm encompasses all other attempts to hurt yourself without suicidal intent. Common forms of self-harm include cutting and burning.

~It's unclear whether or not he intends to harm himself, or simply doesn't care about himself. It's most likely the latter, but a possible symptom.

6. Extreme emotional swings. Unstable emotions and moods are common with BPD. One moment, you may feel happy, and the next, despondent. Little things that other people brush off can send you into an emotional tailspin. These mood swings are intense, but they tend to pass fairly quickly (unlike the emotional swings of depression or bipolar disorder), usually lasting just a few minutes or hours.

~Hoo boy. He goes from content smoking, to gloating about his superiority, to hurting people, to humiliation, to extreme rage, to sort of... unbothered the next day. It's possible he's masking some of it, but he definitely has mood swings.

7. Chronic feelings of emptiness. People with BPD often talk about feeling empty, as if there’s a hole or a void inside them. At the extreme, you may feel as if you’re “nothing” or “nobody.” This feeling is uncomfortable, so you may try to fill the void with things like drugs, food, or sex. But nothing feels truly satisfying.

~Throughout the show, the main plot is that most of the time he feels empty, and only really feels something when he's skating in the zone, especially when he's connected with his Eve (who most likely is his word for special person).

8. Explosive anger. If you have BPD, you may struggle with intense anger and a short temper. You may also have trouble controlling yourself once the fuse is lit—yelling, throwing things, or becoming completely consumed by rage. It’s important to note that this anger isn’t always directed outwards. You may spend a lot of time feeling angry at yourself.

~His attack on Cherry. His final beef with Reki. His fight with Tadashi after realizing he joined the tournament. He definitely has a short fuse.

9. Feeling suspicious or out of touch with reality. People with BPD often struggle with paranoia or suspicious thoughts about others’ motives. When under stress, you may even lose touch with reality—an experience known as dissociation. You may feel foggy, spaced out, or as if you’re outside your own body.

~It can't be said for certain if he dissociates or not, but he was definitely paranoid about Tadashi abandoning him. However, this is a somewhat isolated incident, so it can't be said for certain if he fits the criteria.

So, it's proven he fits 2, 3, 4, 6, 7, & 8, and it's possible but not provable he fits 5 & 9. However, 6 clear symptoms are enough to prove that he has Borderline.

Now. I'm not saying that he's a perfect person--far from it. While his disorder makes him less in control of his actions, he still has to be responsible for them. But this should at least be enough to show a little more consideration.