#side note: Vonnie's 'Flying Ace' joke is in reference to her being asexual

[thefoodwiththedood]

TMI Tuesday! For everyone who isn't Hes: what is the most awful not safe for work story Hes has ever told?

It’s TMI Tuesday! Ask my muse anything you want and they’ll have to answer honestly.

Russoc: “Awful as in how graphic it got, or awful as in, ‘wow, that was a pain to listen to’?”

Gemre: “Don’t both criteria usually go hand-in-hand?”

Russoc: “Ahh, yeah, that’s true. Also, can they really be called ‘Not Safe For Work’ when Hes almost exclusively tells her stories at work?”

Vonnie: “I dunno, man, but I got an answer for this. For me, the worst ones are the ones I was there for—’cause I always ‘member how much it sucked havin’ to be the designated driver. But like, for fuckin’ instead ‘a drinkin’. Like, y’all ‘member the one with the Dowutin bouncer? Who do y’all think had to drag Hes to the hospital after she went n’ shattered her pelvis? No amount ‘a free drinks coulda fixed that girls’ night. Oh, and don’t even get me started on last year’s Koh’hibril party—no, seriously, don’t get me started. I’d really rather not relive the Orgy Pit™ situation, thank ya very much,”

Russoc: “God, yeah, that was a mess—what was it, like, seventy, maybe eighty guys? Man, did we use a lotta febreze after that. But yeah, my opinion? I actually don’t mind Hes telling her stories all too much—let her have her fun, y’know? Who am I to stop her? It’s just…the puns…my god, the puns. That’s where I draw the line, when she starts working those in. Like, I think the worst it ever got was, and I quote, ‘my ass is delic-Hes and it wan-Chaddic’. Not like I don’t have a sense of humor or anything, I just…there’s only so much a man can take, y’know?”

Gemre: “Yeeeah, those get rough when they’re that forced. But yeah, I’m of the same mind, I don’t wanna stop her from having fun. I don’t even mind it that much, my only problem is sometimes I get, uh, jealous a little bit, ‘cause I’m a, uhh…”

0R-D3: “01100001 00100000 01110110 01101001 01110010 01100111 01101001 01101110 00111111″

Gemre: “NO SHUT UP OH-AR, YOU’RE A VIRGIN!!”

0R-D3: “01001001 00100000 01100001 01101101 00100000 01100001 00100000 01110010 01101111 01100010 01101111 01110100″

Gemre: “WHATEVER!! I DON’T EVEN CARE!!”

Russoc: “Obviously.”

Vonnie: “Eh, don’t worry about it kid, it’s no big deal—take it from a flyin’ ace like me, y’ain’t missin’ much. Besides, doin’ it that much might not suit you; not everyone can be like Hes and be a total—”

Hes, bursting through a door: “SAY IT TO MY KRIFFIN’ FACE, D’RUEXIEQ—”

Russoc, holding Hes back as she tries to murder Vonnie: “oKAY, well, thanks for the ask!”