#shu'ulathoi

[skullzanta]

Random Space Orcs Exchange I had thought up.

Alien: "Human, I have discovered a strange 'Videogame' as you call it that features a rather fascinating empire."

Human: "Oh no, PLEASE Tell me its not something bad"

Alien: "...It is a videogame called 'Half-Life 2'--"

Human: sound of frustrated scream of 'WHY' "FIRST HEADCRABS, NOW WHAT? ARE BARNACLES REAL TOO!?"

Alien: "Well- In theory-"

Human: "IN THEORY?!?!"

Alien: "So- This 'Combine Empire' features within the game matches historical records of a possible multiversal empire in the distant past..."

Human: "..."

Alien: "And you see, We have evidence to believe that their empire was destroyed using a missile that launched into their earliest planet and-"

Human: "Was it a boat?"

Alien: ". . .How did you-"

Human: "You havent played Episode 2 have you?"

Alien: "...I was going to, but I had to confirm what was in the game as being intentional or not."

Human: "Wait-... The ship in the...game... Was a time travelling-...Oh good gods."

Alien: "YOU USED TIME TRAVEL!? NO WONDER THE ULEXYSS GALAXY IS NEARLY DESTROYED"

Human: "...I-..WE didn't, I never even knew they existed-"

Alien: "DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DANGEROUS TIME TRAVEL IS-"

The two proceed to then have a short arguement out of panick before they calm down

Alien: "Human- I have to report this."

Human: "...Whatever! Just please don't tell me the Advisors Exist"

Alien: "...That...is our current leader species, the Shu'ulathoi"

Human: "My head hurttsss"

[blacktobackmesa]

I think the idea that mature Shu'ulathoi are driven only by a frenzied mating instinct is Combine propaganda to create a reason why they keep the Advisors in a stunted state. I also think this lie would not work on humans because if you told them that there was a period of their lives where they would just fuck all day and accomplish nothing then wait oh shit i think i hear civil protection coming, i was never here

[dopegardenersheep]

So I was just thinking about the Advisors' inability to breathe oxygen gas bc of their masks and stuff and then my smartass said, 'What if in their native world, they breathe in the type of neurotoxin gas that GLaDOS from Portal just happened to use and that the oxygen gas is just the Advisor equivalent of neurotoxin'

I thought that was funny and now it's a headcanon

[skaruresonic]

having some real Combine thoughts(tm) in this Chili's rn

The headcanon I'm running with in my fic is the Combine cannot be fully perceived by the physical senses. Their language is unspoken; their presence a crushing silence; they can be detected, but on the very fringes of perception.

So, pretty much the "not alien as in 'silicon-based life form,' alien as in 'hyperintelligent shade of blue'" school of thought.

[Breen, as an Advisor] preferred to think he'd by and large risen above such sentimentality, but in practice it proved one of the most difficult habits to shed. Watching her memories stirred a grin on a face that lacked the ability. Although the anatomy necessary to perform such movement didn't exist, the underlying impulse lingered deep in his neural tissues. His cells squirmed at their failure to execute an incompatible function. It was typically during these moments of dysfunction that he sensed the emergence of a soundless presence. It came in waves, amplitudes lapping at his mind. He greeted them by extending them the same manner of silence. Of course, he said, his voice equally noiseless, you who understand everything feel no need to delineate your experiences through these clumsy metaphors. Deathly silence responded. Yes. I know. Language is but a crude stick with which one scribbles nonsense. I will learn to discard it. Until then, please oblige me your patience.

They can manipulate one's senses to perceive - or not perceive - whatever form they wish.

They dwelled in utter void. The cold that overwhelms the body when the mind realizes the heart has stopped, that static-shock paralysis locked from limb to ligament. None knew what to expect of the master race. Through their own stupid, limited lens, humanity constructed models of silicon-based life forms; they theorized breath where none was drawn. They made children's sketches of the possibilities, but in this instant all language lost coherency, all models crumbled to sand. What filled the air was a silence so absolute she could call it nothing except consecrated. White noise, the weightlessness of an idea. Things felt only in the peripheral, in the subliminal. They deemed the Combine an imperialist machine whose fate ended in rust. The horrendous reality was they were nothing. A man could no more hurt them than he could harm his own shadow. Thought without image, dream without meaning, sound without wave. Space sans boundary. Time outside measure. Abstractions. Murky seas of unconsciousness. The slow creep of dark energy. Inevitability. Something resided there, ancient beyond reckoning, but it could not be grasped through sense alone.

My general backstory for the Combine master race is they do not suffer the ravages of the flesh because their telomeres move extremely slowly. They have had millions, if not billions, of years to learn how the universe works, and to transcend death. In that time, they have learned how to extend their senses beyond the boundaries of the cell membrane, allowing their thoughts to manipulate matter without direct, local contact. This is ultimately what makes them capable of long-distance teleportation and telekinesis.

On the surface of a milky pond, life emerged. The correct particles collided, and something unformed grasped its first avaricious breath. That virgin exhalation fed the clouds, igniting a chain reaction that would continue for millennia. Particle storms arose, as did noiseless lightning. Violent cataclysms wracked the planet's epidermis. Crystalline boulders forged inside the mantle now found themselves thrust above the surface. These acted as lightning rods, attracting the electricity the storms generated and inducting them through their incredibly dense structures. The air surrounding these crystals began to repeat the same patterns, weaving the same cloud formations over and again. Time translation symmetry broke in a rare but bizarre pattern. Anything that touched them disappeared. Life cowered in fear of what it did not understand and hid itself away. Cells gestated within protective pods. The slowing of telomeres bestowed upon them the gift of time, as well as subsequent gifts. Ions passed through potassium gates trillions of times, each iteration giving birth to thought. Thought produced idea. Idea constructed civilization. Life found that it was far more amenable to survival to remain inside the pod than to risk exposing its most valuable organs to the mercy of its environment. Life learned to evolve, to extend its senses beyond the boundaries of the cell membrane. Electrical impulses raced faster, life outpacing glia. It felt familiar. Life manipulated thought. Thought manipulated matter. The gas giant harnessed its light to erect cloud-piercing towers. Networks wove sophisticated colonies across its wispy surface. Steel veins bulged along the outer strata; occasionally a clot of light could be seen speeding along one. Civilization thrived in areas once dominated by methane swamps. Life proclaimed its transcendence over the elements.

As a result of their unusual evolution, they are curious about the cycles of life, death, and suffering in other species. But in a cold, detached, Scientific(tm) way.

They study the afflictions of the flesh and death in other species, eventually assimilating mortal beings into forms that are no longer sentient (cannot distinguish one's own mind and sense of self from others) and cannot feel pain through biological modification. They exterminate that which resists assimilation.

What this means is they have an even stronger hivemind than that of the Vortigaunts. Anything that is not of them is considered an "infection" of sorts and gets eradicated.

The enraged thrashing of limbs on a bed of shorn metal clattered in her ears. She went silent for a moment before answering. "Is that what you meant when you told [Breen] 'they' were coming to collect the flesh?" Mossman nodded. "I've heard of it spoken in his office. The Combine police their cohesion quite severely. When one unit suffers bodily harm, it threatens their infrastructure. The others initiate a neurochemical process to dissolve the flesh from the inside-out. You can imagine the rest." Didn't have to, and quite frankly, she preferred not to. Breen unraveled into a mindless sack of organs in the end, as pitiful in death as he'd been in rebirth. "Inviting a foreign consciousness into one of their host bodies is highly taboo. They must have placed him inside one for a specific purpose." "That he failed." "Miserably." Judith's fingertips rose to collect more drops of pus, which she rubbed dry. "I admit I don't fully understand the process myself. It could be a ritual of some kind."

The G-Man's backstory and motivations hinge on what happens when a member of the Combine master race becomes aware of its own mind and self apart from the rest of the collective:

I [will… settle this humiliating state of affairs.] fell from oblivion

[give us clarity to part these false veils of separation. dissolve the chains shackling us to our mortal flesh.] when breath touched me

[do you know what it means to stand on oblivion's precipice? to watch the darkness breathe?] and I

and I?

and

[ I ] alone

was chosen

[open your eyes doctor freeman.] to become

[his blood his bone his thoughts. all stolen all snatched. I signed them away to keep you alive.]

ENLIGHTENED

IN LIGHT

[ I ]

END.

In a nutshell: it ain't pretty.

(His is a complex story involving a lot of moving parts, to say the least. At some points I had to draw a diagram to keep track lol. So I'd best shelve the meat of that topic for another post.)

Contrary to popular belief, the Combine don't have an interest in conquest. As the universe's scientists observing everything behind their thick Plexiglas wall, they don't really want anything---to want is to distinguish a self with desires, after all, and they have no self. Even the G-Man contends that the self is an illusion:

"What do you see?" His tormentor's whispers haunted him, eager to drag him into this rising undertow of madness. "Yourself? Can these entities be called you when they no longer exist?" His tone implied the presumption of ownership foolhardy. "This matter, what you call your 'self,' is a spectrum of illusion. Mirages sharing a common delusion of continuity." That's what makes the Combine so gruesome. Just as a psychic partition separates the scientist from the specimen on the dissecting table, an utter disconnection separates them from other beings.

The pains of mortal beings entail no consequence. You will be as us, or be nothing. The result is the same. "Why us?" Suffering is information. Trauma alters the structure of the genome. The flesh is the vessel through which information flows from being to being. Data evolves. Infinite variation. The gamma rays shuddered and shimmered, tears unshed. "Why?" Death ceases the flow of information. Our study has reached its end.

Humans and Vortigaunts assume an imperialistic framework because that's all they can understand. The Combine are so powerful that they could wipe out the universe if they so desired, but they are only engaged in watching the experiment unfold.

We who form the Universal Union, who are Enlightened. Shu'ulathoi. We observe creation. Our purpose, to advise. To contemplate. We have studied life from the genesis. Yet mysteries abound.

Eventually, all experiments come to a close.

She became crushingly aware of her small being, how alone she stood in this vastness, the beating of her heart and the thrum of her blood writhing against a shroud of suffocation. It was as though she had dived into the ocean's blackest cradle and beheld an all-perceiving darkness, awaiting the beast to open its ceaseless mouth and swallow her whole. 01000001 01101100 01111001 01111000 00100000 01010110 01100001 01101110 01100011 01100101 00001010 00001010 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110110 01100101 00100000 01101101 01100001 01100100 01100101 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 01110010 00100000 01100100 01100101 01100011 01101001 01110011 01101001 01101111 01101110 00001010 00001010 01110011 01110100 01101111 01110000 00100000 01110100 01101000 01100101 00100000 01100010 01110010 01100101 01100001 01110100 01101000 00100000 00001010 00001010 01110010 01100101 01110100 01110101 01110010 01101110 00100000 01110100 01101111 00100000 01110111 01101000 01100001 01110100 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01110111 01100101 01110010 01100101 00100000 01100010 01100101 01100110 01101111 01110010 01100101 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 01110010 00100000 01100010 01101001 01110010 01110100 01101000 00001010 00001010 01000010 01101100 01100001 01100011 01101011 00100000 01001101 01100101 01110011 01100001 00100000 01101001 01110011 00100000 01101110 01101111 00100000 01101100 01101111 01101110 01100111 01100101 01110010 00001010 00001010 01101100 01101001 01100110 01100101 00100000 01100011 01101111 01101110 01110100 01101001 01101110 01110101 01100101 01110011 00100000 01110111 01101001 01110100 01101000 01101111 01110101 01110100 00100000 01101111 01110101 01110010 00100000 01101001 01101110 01110100 01100101 01110010 01100011 01100101 01110011 01110011 01101001 01101111 01101110 00001010 00001010 01110111 01100101 00100000 01101111 01100010 01110011 01100101 01110010 01110110 01100101 00001010 They - it - did not wait for a reply. It they? knew her answer before her neurons conspired to deliver the message to her conscious mind.

[grayrazor]

Saw an interesting fan theory that Advisors are just a higher tier of slave to the Combine. The reason they look the way they do is because their version of the Suppression Field keeps them in a larval state.

Further, that the "Xen Thing" from Episode 3 concept art is an adult Shu'ulathoi that was hiding from the Combine between dimensions, and maybe that's who the G-Man currently works for.

[opossum-disaster]

[Half-Life lore spoilers]

I FINALLY LISTENED THROUGH BREENGRUB MESSAGE COLLECTION

HOLY SHIT THE IMPLICATIONS, THE CONNECTIONS

SO MUCH OF THE LORE COMPLETELY UNSEEN BY MOST OF THE PEOPLE, JUST LIKE THE RICH CULTURE OF SHU'ULATHOI

I'M JUST SCREAMING

[featheredcritter]

ok so i saw ur tags underneath one of ur art posts about ur theory of g-man being a Shu'ulathoi.. it’s very interesting and i kinda wanna hear why and you’re 2 cents into it because it’s fascinating too. i never even considered the idea before !

Ok so the theory is not mine and it's been around since....the breengrub Twitter account i belive? Marc Laidlaw's account where he wrote as a breen into a host body. I won't go super into detail because it's a long talk and complicated but going by the lore he dropped shu'ulathoi adults are capable of shapeshift + their freaky powers= gman! And considering the combine are controlling their kind too, it could tie all the way back with gman and his employers being interested in their downfall. Something something shu'ulathoi resistance! The flaw is that adults don't really care about much outside of sex, so.

This is all i remember at least if i got something wrong please fellow hl fans feel free to tear me apart TwT.

[pseudepigraphonofskaia]

I really like the BreenGrub take on G-Man, but there's also one thing that stands out about it and I don't think I've seen anyone bring up: if the anti-Combine faction of Shu'ulathoi reverse-engineered the Combine's mind-transfer methodology, it seems like the way it works is that it copies personalities instead of transfers consciousness. So that creates this really cool dynamic where one of the people G-Man is taking orders from might be the person whose consciousness his own was copied from, and he was implanted into an actual human infant. This also opens up the idea that G-Man might have actually had to live as a human for a time. The man might have had to go to college or apply for jobs while having the grub he's a copy of that will also outlive him breathing down his neck, which is really fucking funny and really cool at the same time.

[bunny-heels]

G-Man and probably his whole species NEEDS humanity to succeed cause then the Combine won't be around to destroy other planets like it did his (if the theory of him being a Shu'ulathoi is true)

He probably sees his species IN humanity considering their abilities with science, having a will to stay alive, and having it be a miracle that most of them are still around and hoping for survival.

Humans are extremely important to him in a lot of ways. But the most important 2 are their willingness to fight oppression and their drive to unite to keep their species alive. Which is what the Shu'u had to do and are still fighting for.

G-Man clearly wants humanity to win. He wanted the Citadel and Combine Portals to be destroyed. He wanted humans to get their revenge, to give justice to the thousands of other planets who didn't get theirs.

G-Man also just acts Like That cause he's autistic he can't help looking a lil silly and evil. He was born that way. He don't know better he's just tryna do his job.

No. Fuck you. G-man loves humanity. He wants them to succeed. He wants everyone to be happy. He was never the villian, and he should not be labeled as one. I mean, he put Gordon in stasis just so he could help humanity later!!!!!!! G-man loves humans!!!!!!!!!!!!

[bunny-heels]

Listen I know it's late so sorry for the inconvenience but. I wish to hear your gman shulathoi hcs and ideas because they're all SO GOOD and I'd love to hear your thoughts

OKAY. SO.

i got this ask at around 1:40 am. it is 8 am. im. :]

TL:DR for those who dont wanna read a fucking essay novel

Shu'us and Vortigaunts are actually allies and have an unspoken respect for one another

G-Man was born out of the Shu'us who escaped the Combine

he has over 600 siblings

parents are dead. very common for that to happen in their species after birth

seen as the leader for their plan because his mind was more complex and unpredictable compared to his siblings

he was only emotionally attached to his siblings and Elders for the longest time

likes birds because they remind him of his species

felt an emotional and spiritual attachment to Alyx specifically because she was seen as a golden child and had a very big imagination, just like him and how he was seen by the Elders

wanted to take Alyx into his care immediately after the Citadel blew but the Elders stopped that by having the Vorts step in

turned out it was because he had ideas of how to actually get her on board but he thought the Elders wouldve rejected them

Elders decide to listen to him and thats how HL:A happens

also hates Breen viciously because of how he treats Shu'ulathoi larvas with the Combine

also is already very used to humans hating him because hes aware he caused all this hell

just wants things to be better tbh but hes a scary looking man so you wouldnt know that at first glance

if you wanna skip that though and read my fuckin cringe narrative fic then go ahead :]

we're gonna start with stuff given to us by the breengrub twitter.

the Shu'ulathoi got infected by a virus which greatly affected the weaker of the species and submitted them to the Combine so the stronger ones had to flee.

and those stronger Shu'us probably went to go breed stronger Shu'us so that they don't get infected with the virus as well, so they won't be victims to the Combine.

it's also said that Shu'us can choose the form they have when they are being developed, so they have their own form when they are born.

when they're young they can only talk telepathically to other Shu'us, when they've matured they then can talk to others.

Shu'us aren't material-centered creatures, whatever they can come up with in their minds and imagination is bigger and better than anything physically given to them in the world.

whatever Shu'us have been bred now that aren't part of the Combine are not the bad guys, they aren't larvas who are hellbent on getting other races and species eradicated, and they aren't children forever. they can grow and learn and be their own person, mature and get better at their abilities, most of all they fight against the Combine Shu'us.

also, Elder Shu'us had already made acquaintance with Vortigaunts millions of years ago, due to their similarities. they have an unspoken alliance together because of it. it's why there is never really an ill will shown between them in the games.

going with that-

G-Man is one of those stronger bred Shu'us. He was born in a clutch of about 630+ siblings. all of which either reside secretly as any of the Earth's species, or work along side the Elder Shu'us. both parents are deceased.

G's siblings look up to him the most because he's had that view placed on him since before he was even hatched. that he'd be the one leading his race to freedom and to stop the Combine. he's been placed on a pedestal from a very young age.

and it's all because of his head. when his egg was laid and the Elders were able to look into his mind, he clearly wasn't anything like his siblings. his imagination and mind was like the crystal he sent to Xen, unpredictable and no telling what would happen in there.

what you saw in HL:A was merely a glimpse of what the inside of his head looked like, what it sounded like, what it felt like.

that's why you never see anyone else like him, because even though his siblings also have wild minds and have the abilities that he has, they can't do it like he can. the Elders loved all the children equally, but it was clear from the start that he was the golden child.

but none of his siblings hated him for it or anything. they saw him as a good thing. he was their leader and savior, jealousy was never something in their mind, they new better than that.

and everything was going very well, for all of them. they had their leader, they had their kind masters, they all had each other, and they had a battleground they could work with, which was Earth. which they probably went to around in the 1600s maybe? probably earlier than that. they've always been there, but hid it so well. IF someone did find out, it was dismissed as just being 'alien myths', so it was fine.

but a species with intelligence will, obviously, still have emotions and thoughts attached to them. it wasn't just G-Man that went through them, of course, his siblings also followed. those who went to Earth as humans grew to have friends and even families, albeit maybe with adopted children or none at all, the ones who were animals grew to love any owners or animal packs they had. and obviously, the ones who stayed with the Elders considered them to be like their parents, a huge family.

G-Man never really got close to any humans, however. not emotionally. he had people who considered him a 'pal' or a work buddy or acquaintance, people who would just ramble to him about their troubles like he was a statue, or enjoyed being with him on their breaks because he was calm. but he never personally considered them close to him. he felt family love for his siblings and friendship towards any species that were allied with them, and that was it. he did at least like birds though. especially crows. he thought they were lovely to watch and fun to look after in his spare time. but that was that.

not that he didn't like humans, but it was that he held his grip as a leader, he worked in the shadows, he saw humans like teammates and soldiers. he could befriend them, get comfy with them, but he had a job. it wasnt like a normal one, but it was a role he took nonetheless.

but whatever took place at Black Mesa felt like fate to him. not just with them experimenting on the borderworld, having connections to the military, being extremely influential on the government, among other factors. but the people. they were an extreme key factor. they way the staff, scientists, security guards, engineers, mechanics, all worked together and got to know one another, despite them being in such different sectors, levels, different branches of their work entirely, yet they so cleanly kept their works private and within their own areas, was extremely fascinating to him. like ants.

talking with a group of scientists while they worked in their labs, chatting with one of his assigned security guards while they walked him to the next sector, introducing himself to Breen and his associates. something about it, how they worked and lived together. it felt like home. like a human, more fragile version of home.

that's when he met the Vance family. obviously, with the sector of where the experiment was being conducted, he had to meet with the staff there regularly. so he became close to Kleiner and Eli as even a bit more than pals. Kleiner probably would've considered him a friend even, saying that he wished he could meet Gordon personally, he probably would like him. Barney too, maybe. Eli had no ill feelings towards G' at the time. he thought he was a decent guy, more friendly than most government officials were for sure. so friendly in fact that he even got to speak with Eli's wife, and mother of their only child, Azian.

she came around a few times during break hours at the cafeteria, and sometimes the labs. she was a kind woman, liked to sit next to Eli when they were at a table or stand next to him at the counters. and she was great to have conversations with. she herself was a scientists, but in a different branch of the facility, and was allowed to take time off of work to raise their child, same with Eli, but he was forced sometimes to get to work because otherwise he'd never leave their kid alone.

and speaking of the kid, G' did eventually meet her.

it was a day when Azian was visiting Eli at the labs, and she had no babysitter to look after their daughter. children were never allowed in the facilities, except in the more safer areas for high paying school fieldtrips. Azian and their daughter were an exception due to them living in the dorm houses of the facility plus being staff. G' was visiting the labs as well with Breen at the time, and walking in, that was when he saw an extremely small child standing at the legs of her parents.

Alyx.

Azian apologized for bringing her in, not knowing they were both coming, but Breen quickly assured her it was fine, as long as G' didn't see a problem with it, which he didn't. he didn't mind children, he had to look after a few of them in his time on Earth, and most times they enjoyed his company and he enjoyed theirs. he did a fairly small introduction to her, so that she wouldnt be too afraid of him.

but he obviously was taken aback when she ran up to him and began making circle around his legs, stopping at his feet and giving a very excited 'hello'. she made her way to a counter next to him and climbed it, with Azian and Eli obviously worried she would hurt herself, and she stood up top the counter, exclaiming how tall he was, and pale, and super official looking, and that he had weird eyes, and that his hand must hurt from holding his briefcase, and eventually Azian had to grab her in her arms and both her plus Eli apologized, saying that she was a very curious and energized child. Breen laughed it off, saying how it was sweet of her to be so open and friendly. G' merely looked at her with slightly big eyes, and a very slight smile, saying

"she's a very interesting child, definitely."

something along those lines. but his thought about her were way more than that. complex, confusing, all over the place, so many trains running at the same time in his head going in impossible ways.

the most weird one had to be that he felt a sort of similarity to her.

the rest of the times that he had seen Alyx, her personality was so strong. she was curious, inventive, interested in so many things, she loved to participate in anything, she had so many ideas of her own, and importantly, her parents looked very highly to her. Eli praised her constantly, not just for how cute she was, but her bright mind and high imagination. and Azian thought she was so incredibly talented, always catching her drawing and coming up with her own ways to have fun with anyone she was with, or if she was on her own. he even heard stories about how kind and helping she was towards others, adults and children alike. she never wanted anyone to feel alone or helpless, she loved making others happy and finding her own ways to bring their spirits up. her parents held her up in such high states, they already had plans on where she'd go for schooling, and said that, no matter what she took as a career, they knew she was going to be the best at.

it felt like there was nothing she could do to ever disappoint them.

maybe thats why he felt so similar to her.

maybe thats why he felt this connection, like they shared something within the both of them, mentally, spiritually.

G' already knew he was meeting his destination. the crystals, the military, the researchers. he felt something similar when he found Gina and Colette, who seemed attached to the hip and could rely on each other. when he found Adrian and had the feeling that he could be someone greater with his abilities and power to adapt to survive. he even felt this with Gordon, knowing his vocal disability and that he had the luck of some sort of deity.

but it felt more than that. it didnt just feel like he met fate, it felt like he'd crashed into it like a brick wall. that little girl, without herself knowing, was someone special and unique, was strong in will and mind, was stubborn and determined, was brave and filled with courage, and she barely backed down from anything. this wasn't just child naivety or blissful ignorance. this was more than that.

that was the key.

she was a key to everything he needed. that last little piece to complete his puzzle.

and he wasn't going to throw any of that away.

but he also didnt want to abuse it.

he stayed out of her sight the rest of her life after the Cascade. he never even showed up to her when Eli and her got to safety and where able to find the rest of their survived friends. it was all part of the plan, the big idea to take place. plus if he even tried to go near anyone, especially her, Eli would've tried to grab him by the throat. he could take him, but he didnt want the hassle, and didnt want Alyx to worry anymore for her fathers health than she already had to deal with.

but he kept a close eye on her and watched as she grew, physically and mentally, emotionally and socially. to say he was excited about it, it wouldnt be the right word, not his context. he was proud. he was so proud of her for turning out to be the best she could have become in the situation she was placed in. he couldnt have been happier about it.

but he did go on to wonder

if this hadn't happened, and there were no dangers out there for her to worry about, and he never was in her life, what she would've been like. obviously he knew that, he looked into it admittedly, he was curious. he saw that reality in everyone he took an interest in, he wanted to know, it was only fair.

it was more of how he personally felt about it. would he have been happy staying content with the family he had now, of tens of Elders and hundreds of siblings. or would he have eventually longed for something greater. something like Gina and Colette, they were not blood related but shared a special bond. something like Gordon and Adrian, finding others not part of his gene pool that could survive like they could.

something like Alyx, where it felt like he looked into a distorted fuzzy spiritual mirror of himself.

of course, the Elders knew about it, and although they were worried as to what that could mean for the plan, G' had assured them thoroughly that, no matter what he felt towards any of the humans he encountered, it would never disrupt the plan.

but the concern was still there. and it worsened when the Citadel exploded and they had Freeman in stasis. because it meant that Alyx was still there, untouched, not bothered by the flow of time or the aftermath of the explosion. that wasnt part of it, and they got wind that he was going to do something to Freeman, probably send him out on his own while he collected Alyx. but it wasnt the right time.

why he'd want to collect her at that time is a mystery. maybe he thought it was the only opportunity he had to get to her, to have her joins his side. but it wasnt the right way. his impulses got the better of him. so the Elders contacted the only ones who wouldve been able to do something about it. Vorts came in their aid, and Alyx and Gordon were out of his grasps until he was reminded of what he had to do.

he told them he thought there was no other way of getting at her. that any idea that he suggested wouldve been refused and that he had to do at least something. the Elders realized they really had no choice, and listened to whatever ideas he had in mind.

and thats how everything past Alyx's revival happened. it was all planned out and needed to be done.

he knew she wouldnt like it, wouldnt agree to it, wouldnt be able to understand why he had to do what was done, but he knew it was for the better, that she'd one day be able to see why somethings were the way they were, and why she needed to do what she'd done to that Advisor. one day she'd know, and she'd be in a better position, with those she loved by her side. and he knew he wasnt one of them. but he was content in knowing she'd be in her own life, with her own family, and happy. besides, he was used to not being liked, what with Eli no longer trusting him, and Breen hating him for bring Gordon back to destroy the Combine. although he shouldve seen that coming given he and that army were using his species like biological weapons, like they did with everything else.

but things would be different. one day. and he and the humans and vortigaunts and all other species wouldnt have to worry anymore.

one day.

[kilhara]

Feeling kinda maternal lately, so have a sleeping G-Dad with his clutch of infant Shu'ulathoi grub potats

[thelump13]

Hansell's newborn shu'ulathoi daughter Ivy

[narklos]

Half-Lore #2: The G-Man Theories

This topic was the second-most voted in the poll! If there's any others you'd like me to cover, just let me know. Without further ado, here's all we know about the G-Man's identity! Take a peek below the cut:

Let me start by saying that not even Valve really knows what the G-Man is. His identity, which has been hinted at throughout the series, has changed significantly throughout the 25 years that Half-Life itself has existed. To get a full grasp of what each theory means, I'm going to give you a rundown of his history in the game's development. I'd say a quick rundown, but I'd be lying to your face. Here we go!

Half-Life The name 'G-Man' actually comes from this game as it's what his model was called. This is a shorthand for 'government man', a shady figure who works within the USA's top-secret projects. Earlier models of G-Man actually featured the Department of Defence logo on his briefcase, indicating that the G-Man was tied to them somehow (or at least pretending to be tied to the government).

It was also heavily implied that the G-Man was the administrator of Black Mesa, as another one of his models from the Goldsource era features the Black Mesa logo on the briefcase. The administrator's role in the game was primarily conveyed through letters, signed with the name L.M. Here's one of the letters, which is welcoming Gordon to the facility (and also confirms that Gordon can speak?):

The G-Man was said to have 'gone to great lengths' to get the Xen crystal sample that caused the Resonance Cascade, which was our first clue that he was responsible for the Xenian invasion from the beginning. Hints from the Nihilanth also tell us that quite a few others are aware of the G-Man's meddling- as well as try to warn Gordon that the G-Man's not human, and that he's not an ally.

You can see the shift away from the administrator identity in Opposing Force, when Adrian Shepard's diary talks of a strange man that showed up a few days ago, and was talking with his superiors. This gives us the sense that the G-Man wasn't a force working from inside of Black Mesa, but rather without it. The veracity of this sighting is a bit up in the air though, as most of Opposing Force has been retconned.

It's safe to say that the G-Man's identity wasn't solid, even from the beginning. So where the hell does that leave us?

Half-Life 2 During development of HL2, the G-Man was still going to be the former administrator of Black Mesa; Breen and the G-Man's characters have always been quite tied up due to their dual development. The face model for G-Man, a therapist named Frank Sheldon, was actually slated to be for Breen's character instead. However, after a Valve employee did a quick edit to the facial captures for Breen, it was decided to give Frank Sheldon's face to the G-Man instead.

At this point, the administrator L.M was retconned, being replaced as the administrator of Black Mesa by Dr. Wallace Breen. L.M essentially underwent a weird sort of meiosis and two characters spawned from one.

We know for a fact that Gordon's 'contract' with the G-Man was something passed around by important players in the G-Man's plan, and bidded on. Breen is aware of Gordon, and believed that he has bought Gordon out, therefore preventing him from futhering the rebellion against the Combine. However, the G-Man was double-crossing him, and Breen died in the final battle when Mossman betrayed Breen and set Gordon free. Though, I wonder what Breen bid for the contract?

Although this means that we got an incredibly well-written and tragic villain, it also means that we're back to square one in terms of G-Man's identity. No more L.M, no more government ties, no more Black Mesa. So what does Half-Life 2 give us instead?

As I mentioned earlier, it was always implied that G-Man wasn't human. The alien identity is played more strongly in HL2, where the link between the G-Man and the shu'ulathoi (Combine advisors) is established. The Vortigaunts are able to hide away from the psychic powers of the shu'ulathoi, as their connection to the Vortessence allows them to take actions the shu'u cannot see or prevent. They also refer to the advisors as shu'ulathoi, as it's a language the shu'u can't comprehend.

The Vorts are the only force shown to be capable of preventing the G-Man from reaching Gordon. During Episode 1, the Vorts save Gordon from stasis, and for the duration of the episode (and for the first part of episode 2, when Gordon is still under the protection of the Vorts), we don't see G-Man at all. Any actions that Gordon takes is completely free of any G-related meddling. It's implied, therefore, that the G-Man's true origin is a shu'ulathoi.

Breengrub The G-Man - shu'ulathoi ties are made even stronger in Marc Laidlaw's Breengrub account. There, Breen, whose conscience has been transferred to a shu'ulathoi host body (the one he mentioned in a conversation with another combine advisor at the end of HL2), recounts the world of the shu'ulathoi.

Powerfully psychic, they could hatch into any form they wished when they left the larval phase. They are referred to as dreamers and philosphers, a society where ideas are currency. At some point, they fell ill to a parasite, making them weaker and easier to conquer. The Combine did so, and kept the shu'u in their grub phases in order to better exploit their powers and prevent them from fighting back. It's implied that the Combine planted this parasite in the first place. It caused the shu'ulathoi to destroy their own minds and culture.

Breengrub explains that a few shu'ulathoi remain on the home planet, hidden and slumbering. A few were even able to escape the Combine invasion. It's heavily implied that G-Man was one of these grubs to escape the invasion. He hatched into the form of a human, and made his way to Earth, orchestrating the Resonance Cascade in order to bring about the ultimate downfall of the Combine at the hands of Gordon Freeman. His 'employers' are implied to be the slumbering shu'ulathoi that remain on his home planet.

So, that's it, right? He's a shu'ulathoi!

Well, not really. This is a rough draft of what Episode 3 could've touched upon, and this isn't anywhere close to canon, as Marc no longer works for Valve (so stop pestering him with emails!). It's safe to say that whatever they were planning back in 2007 isn't anywhere close to their intentions with the G-Man nearly over two decades later, when they released Half-Life: Alyx. Speaking of which!

Half-Life: Alyx I'd like you to keep in mind that HLA was considered a 'soft reboot' of the Half-Life franchise. Rectons were made, new characters introduced, and Eli got a sick new jacket. We can't exactly apply the old canon to this fresher chapter, but we can make inferences. As you all know, the G-Man was captured by the Combine, five years before Gordon was released from statis. His power was so great that they had to literally heft up an entire apartment block to contain him. We don't see him in person for the majority of the game, but we do see him in the Vortigaunt murals, which depict their enslavement at the hands of the Nihilanth, and the G-Man's meddling in Gordon's fate.

(Fun fact! He was originally meant to be there against his own will. Here's some of the concept art that explored this idea!)

Vortigaunts are used to contain his power, and their own Vortessence is sapped in substations to ensure that he can't escape. Whether this is still referring to the shu'ulathoi theory or just tapping into Episode 1's revelations is still unknown.

Something interesting to note is that Eli mentions that "...whatever's in the Vault really hates the Combine". We've therefore established that this soft reboot of the franchise is more clearly establishing the G-Man's vendetta against the Combine. His hatred for Vortigaunts can also be connected to his imprisonment- it's implied he was tortured with their energy!

Hahn, labelled in the files as 'Contractor', is adamant that they "...move the [Vault]" when it's clear that Alyx is going to set him free. She's also implied to be higher on the Combine pecking order than Breen. Her role in the franchise is, as of yet, unknown, but Erik Wolpaw has told us that they've got 'plans' for her. She's clearly aware of the G-Man's role in the rescas, as well as what he's capable of. Maybe she was present at Black Mesa? Maybe the two have made a deal in the past? Maybe she's simply been told that he's dangerous? We still don't know.

"This is great and all, Narklos." I hear you say, rather loudly, at your computer screen. "But what in the Nine Hells does this mean for his identity?"

Truth be told, my inquisitive reader, this reboot has completely thrown any and all theories we may have up into the air. The nature of a reboot is that anything we may know isn't something we can take for granted anymore. Alyx is now under the G-Man's employ, Eli's still alive, and for all we know, Russell could be the next villain. It's an exciting time for theorycrafters who want to unravel gaming's biggest mystery, but for lore sticklers, it's a bit of a dead end.

With the history of the G-Man's various identities in mind, let's go through some of the most famous (and infamous) G-Man theories from the past 25 years.

G-Man is Gordon from the future This is an earlier theory. Obviously the link can be made between Gordon Freeman and the G-Man's names. A funny theory made by players in the noughties, with not much value behind it.

G-Man is Alyx's grandfather This was more of a joke theory talked about by some Valve developers. It was brought about, most likely, when the players discussed how familial G-Man seemed to Alyx, having saved her as a baby. He also seems to really care for her wellbeing, and implores Gordon to get Alyx safely to White Forest. G-Man also calls Alyx "my dear". While it isn't entirely impossible, considering all we know, this theory is definitely false. Still though, it's a nice little analysis of how the G-Man is capable of expression emotions other than smug superiority and quiet rage.

G-Man is a Shu'ulathoi This one's still the most prevalent theory we have today. It's the one most subscribe to due to the amount of evidence, both from the games and from other sources, that we have to draw from. G-Man was a shu'ulathoi that escaped his home planet after the Combine invaded. His employers are the slumbering shu'ulathoi that remain, safe from Combine meddling. He's orchestrated the events of the series and beyond to get revenge for the destruction of his homeworld and kin. G-Man hatched into the form of a human to fool others, and his psychic powers can be attributed to the psychic nature of the shu'u. His strange breathing patterns are due to the shu'ulathoi being unable to breathe in Earth's atmosphere, hence why they all wear breathing apperatus (and at one point in development, the Combine were meant to be replacing the atmosphere with toxic fumes that allowed the shu'u to breathe). Though we've got the most evidence for this one, considering the direction the series has taken, I wouldn't fully subscribe to this anymore, as there's still so much that we could find out.

G-Man is Valve Again, another early/joke theory. G-Man is the embodiment of the Valve developers, following the player around and putting them into 'statis' (i.e: ending the game) when they reach the end of the campaign.

G-Man runs the Combine Another weird one. This probably came about from the confusion behind G-Man's motives in the second game, and how he never seems to fully help the rebels.

G-Man is a Nihilanth This is one of the earlier theories that I can remember, at least. Because the Nihilanth is such a powerful alien, many speculated that the G-Man was also a Nihilanth in another form. However, this theory fell apart when it was revealed that the Nihilanth was actually the last of its species.

And really, that's all we know. The G-Man has been, and will most likely remain, one of the most famous figures in gaming. Ironic, considering how little we truly know about him. We don't even know his name- the one we refer to him by now is simply what his model is called!

Who's to say what we'll find out in the future? Will we ever get what we're searching for? Do we really need to know? Isn't the beauty of a character like the G-Man that we know enough to guess, but we don't know enough to understand? I'll leave that up to you.

If you've read to the bottom, thank you! Here's a video of the G-Man and Kleiner beating the shit out of each other.

[unatural]

Some Shu'ulathoi larve (a combine advisor)

Top left to bottom: no background, void/stasis background, black background

[skaruresonic]

The Combine: We are an all powerful interdimensional empire with countless worlds under our control! No one can hope to match us!

Samus: Ever heard of the Space Pirates? The Ing?

"What?"

"Exactly, so scurry along"

The Combine may have infinite resources at their disposal to wipe you the fuck off the face of the universe, but do they have T H E B A B E Y? I think the fuck not Fun fact: according to the Breengrub Twitter, the Shu'ulathoi were beings of pure thought that exchanged ideas like currency, and even they found themselves subjugated by the Combine, who were referred to in all caps as "THEY" and "THEM."