#shredtheshame

[devildrinksvodka]

Day 93

Storytime… I get to school early in the morning, and occasionally I walk in the front door at the same time as parents who are dropping off their child at the “before school” Care program– a program for parents who have to work early and need the school to look after their child until school starts. A couple days ago, there was a parent walking in behind me. I let him in without checking his ID…

[devildrinksvodka]

6-30-17 Another Relapse

I foolishly picked up a box of wine and drank the first night in Tawas.  Felt crappy the next day and wasn’t going to drink the second night-- but it was there and I was bored.. so I did.  

Drinking didn’t make things GREAT.  On the second morning, we had to get up and get the place cleaned up and head home.  One thing I want to mention is that I was SO short tempered with the kids.  I knew it was the hangover.  I was in a terrible mood.  My mental and physical states were sad and painful.  

We are going back up tonight.  I’m not sure what or if I will drink this weekend.  Monday is the 3rd anniversary of my mom’s death, it is going to be a hard day.

NOOOOOOOO!   I reread the last two lines, and NO.  I will NOT drink this weekend.  I DON’T want to feel as bad as I did yesterday and Wednesday.  I DON’T want to be short tempered with my family and unmotivated.  More than likely it will just be non drinkers up there anyway, so I don’t even need to be tempted by others drinking!

Here is a quick list of strategies for when I feel tempted:

-- Treat myself (food, special drink, apparel-- whatever it takes!)

-- Go outside-- go for a walk or down to the beach and take in nature

-- Read or listen to a podcast

-- Make a list of reasons why I will regret it the next day

Ok team!  We’ve got this!  I will not sit back and “maybe” drink.  I. WILL. NOT. DRINK.  PERIOD!!

Now off to do some more writing and reflecting and then go to AA to hear a powerful speaker.  

#alcoholic #alcoholrecovery #recovery #relapse #addiction #alcoholaddiction #shredtheshame #alcoholism #soberlife #soberhouse #sobriety