#shoutout to the door to door guy who left the neighborhood because he saw me carry this in

[flesh-into--gear]

60v, brushless dc, 2.5Ah, lightweight frame, toolless breakdown....

he may still call me "boy", but my dad sure knows the way to a girl's heart

[riotfuckery]

Shattered hearts and clean shirts

Pining!Sero Hanta x f!reader (slight Cheater!Bakugo Katsuki x reader)

A/N: Hello beautiful readers! It’s your friendly neighborhood big tiddy goth gf and lowkey weeb 💖I’m here with an extra long angst/comfort fic featuring best boy Sero! Best boy doesn’t get the love he deserves sometimes so I’m here to change that! Also shoutout to my writing senpais who were so incredibly kind and sweet to me as to show my Shinso fic love. I’m sending lots of love your way! I also hope you don’t mind me tagging you 💖💖💖 @queensynderella @kingtamakimurder @ikinabi @trafalgar-temptress Extra A/N: Another writing senpai gave me permission to tag them so here they are @quirkless-fics @thedreadthread Thank you again senpais 💖🥺💖

Sero always considered himself a plain looking guy. He thought he was nothing special with a plain quirk and weird elbows. You always made him feel special, beautiful and loved. You tended to do that with everyone you met apparently cause you scored yourself a relationship with the angriest and most volatile student of UA along with a school wide reputation of being the kind cutie who you could get patched up by without any embarrassment. You were gentle, kind, and patient with a strong quirk to go with it.

You were blessed with a quirk that made any living thing grow or heal at the expense of your own energy. Gently touching a broken arm would heal it within a few seconds, whispering sweet words to a dying flower made it spring to life and bloom brighter than ever. The plants you spring to life heeding your commands, forming walls and giant thorns seemingly out of nowhere. Your undying need to want to heal and make things better earned you a spot in class 1-A.

Apparently he wasn’t the only one who thought that, noticing his ash blonde friend take a liking to you because he was too prideful to go to recovery girl at times. You made your way to the bakusquad. Befriending the energetic redhead and blonde first. Eventually you made your way around the whole crew.

Mina was overjoyed to have another girl in the squad. Always having sleepovers and girls nights, wasting away the hours filling your faces with junk food and talk of boys. So when she learned you had a small thing for the ash blonde she immediately went to work. Soon enough he saw you chatting with the blonde and saw that something was happening much to his own dismay.

His heart would squeeze in his chest, making it almost impossible to breathe when he saw how Bakugo was treating you. He always called you “bandaid” and “shitty girl”. You always brushed it off with a smile and always helped him along with every student in the school. When he heard Bakugo loudly announce to the class that both of you were dating along with the threats to kill whoever came too close, he thought his heart would fall to the pit of his stomach.

He was pining after you almost painfully, he saw how Bakugo should shake off your hugs and call you clingy when you tried to hold his hand. His heart ached at the thought that you would be okay being treated like that. You were always brushing it off as the excuse that he was shy and saying he would open up soon enough but he was always observant. He saw the way couples would hold hands and give small kisses in public, he noticed the hurt in your eyes at the thought of never having that feeling. He saw the flashes of sadness in your eyes and the small sighs when you were particularly upset one day.

Sero did what any good friend would do and talked you about it, knowing keeping feelings bottled up would only leave them to explode. He pushed aside his feelings and gave a chance to let out your feelings without being judged. He caught you after class one day, saying he needed to talk to you about an assignment. Bakugo was nowhere in sight and that made him sigh in disappointment. How could he just leave such a beautiful girl by herself and call her horrible nicknames? He couldn’t fathom it.

“Hey Sero, what’s up? You need help with anything?” You smiled brightly at him, he thought he would be blinded by it. He stopped himself before he could get too lost in his one sided love for you (ouch). He grinned back immediately “Actually, I’m fine for right now. Maybe I could use your help later with some home work. But I just wanted to ask are you okay? Ya know like emotionally? I promise I won’t tell anyone. You just seem to be upset a lot more and I was wondering if I could help you with that” he spoke nervously. You on the other hand were caught off guard. Your eyes widened a bit and your lips parted for a split second before you smiled shyly at him.

“Oh geez am I that obvious?” You looked him shyly, your hand covering the side of your neck. He thought it was cute you picked that habit up from Kirishima while also wondering what other habits you picked up from the rest of the squad. “Well yeah I’ve been upset, I’m just really sad and frustrated right now. But let’s go somewhere more private yeah?” You moved your hand to wave at him to follow you. You both headed straight for your dorm and gently ushered him in. You locked the door before taking off your shoes and tie.

He took off his shoes and left them next to yours and gently put his bag down by the entrance. He saw you make your way over to your bed and plop down on it. A small blush made its way to his face as he was hit with a tsunami of nervousness. He was here, in your ROOM, ALONE, WITH THE DOOR LOCKED. If he muscles got anymore stiff, he thought he would pass out.

Your light giggle made him relax and look over at you. You were still sitting on your bed and looked up at him with amusement, you smiled at him cheekily. “No need to be nervous Sero, I just wanted to talk to you. Nothing more, I don’t bite unless ya ask ya know?” He blushed and did the kiri embarrassed move. “No I know” he chuckled and moved to sit backwards on your desk chair across from the bed. He gave you a friendly smile and small nod as if pushing you to continue.

You took a deep breath and flopped down on the bed while staring at the ceiling poster you have of your fav band. “Well I’m just really frustrated and sad, it’s all about dating Katsuki. Like yes he’s nice to me in his own way but how hard is it to hold hands in public? Show me he’s interested? It feels like all I’m doing is annoying him” you sighed and propped yourself up to look at him. His black eyes never leaving yours and giving you another minuscule nod to tell you to continue.

“People ask questions you know, and it just makes me sad because I keep making excuses for him. Like how many times do I have to come up with some random line? Why do I feel like I’m always giving and I’m never getting anything back? Am I asking for too much Sero?” You ranted in frustration, looking at him for answers. He blinked slowly and inhaled slowly before exhaling and loosening his tie.

“I don’t personally think you’re asking too much, I agree with you actually. Like how hard is it hold hands? Yeah maybe he’s too pussy to buck up and show the world he’s dating you. But not even in private he’s sweet to you?” He asked. You shook your head slightly. “Well I guess he’s nicer and calls me babe. But still doesn’t hold my hand or anything. He gets angry at me when I talk to any other guy outside of him.” You sighed again, he noticed you seemed to do that a lot today.

You and Bakugo were still new, only a few months in. You wouldn’t say it was love but you liked him quite a bit. Your patience with the explosive blonde was never ending it seemed. Until one day you were avoiding Bakugo and the rest of the squad like the plague. He found you sitting underneath the trees in the courtyard, just looking up at the trees during lunch. Your slumped shoulders and dull puffy eyes and tears threatening to leak out immediately putting him in a state of alarm but decided to leave you for the time being. You’ve grown quite close to the ravenette, now you considered each other close friends. He hoped for more from you but he never got his hopes too high, just keeping it to daydreaming in class and free periods.

He noticed you were off today. During training with the class, you were being harsher than usual. Sending small spikes into your unlucky training partner and much larger precisely aimed thorns into their clothes to pin them to the ground. Whispering into the air and summoning bright green vines to shield you if someone ever got close enough to you. If they bursted through your vine wall, you came at them with thorns the size of large hunting knives and slashed them up almost ruthlessly. You didn’t talk much and your eyes held regret everytime you healed small pinpricks and cuts on your opponent after your sparring. Just muttering a small sorry and you were off to your next sparring partner.

Once the end of the school day arrived he immediately looked for you, the rest of the squad going off and finding Bakugo to question what he did to make you this upset. He found you in the same spot you were at during lunch and quickly sat down next to you, putting an arm around your shoulders and pulled you close to him, placing your head on his chest and your legs on his lap while resting his chin on top of your head. He could feel the shaking in your entire body before he heard the muffled sobs in chest. He ran one hand on your lower back and the other rubbing comforting circles with his thumb on your calf.

He didn’t say anything and he didn’t need to yet. He just pulled you closer and held you tighter while your muffled sobs continued to soak his shirt. He didn’t care that you ugly sobbed all over him, the only thing he cared about was making you feel better. Your sobs turned to hiccups and that turned to semi even breathing.

You couldn’t bring yourself to look at him but he sure as hell looked at you. He couldn’t help but think you look adorable, wiping your red eyes and pink nose with your sleeve. You thought and felt like you looked disgusting so you still refused to look at him. He sighed in defeat, not wanting you push you any further cause the last thing he wanted was to make you cry again.

He rested his chin on your head once again, never removing his hold. You found comfort in it as a bit awkward as it was. His heart was beating steadily and a bit faster due to worry. He was hoping you didn’t notice. All he wanted was for you to be happy and feel loved, even if it wasn’t with him. In his perfect fantasy world, you two would have dated from the start. But this world isn’t perfect.

“H-he was cheating on me, the entire time. I caught him in the act with another girl. And when I asked him how long, he looked at me like I was dumb and said ‘the entire time, you thought you meant something to me huh? You were just a prize to be won, another achievement over stupid Deku’ and I left. Is there something wrong with me? Is that why he cheated? I did all that I could to make him happy but my best just wasn’t enough” you cried. Sero’s eyes widened and his body tensed, you could almost see the words slap him in the face. He knew Bakugo wasn’t the gonna win any awards for ‘person of the year’ but he didn’t know the ash blonde could be this cruel.

He held you close and moved his hand to softly pet your hair, trying all his might to soothe you without revealing his true intentions for you. He was still hopelessly in love with you so seeing you sobbing almost made him confess. Although he wasn’t the most book smart, he knew how to read people and socialize like a pro. He held the almost painful flowering of the love he had for you.

“Oh sunflower, I’m so sorry. I’m so so sorry. I had no idea that this was even happening. The rest of the squad went to go after him after I went to find you. They must be beating the shit out of him right now and he definitely deserves every hit he takes.” He spoke softly to you, almost afraid of you bursting into tears again. Almost on cue, your sobbing continued but harder this time. All the times you had hope for the blonde and for the patience you had for him wasted, reality harshly scattering your romantic dreams to the wind like ash. You cried for the you a few weeks ago when you were so stupid and blind.

He just kept holding you, reassuring you that you were a good person who tried your best and that Bakugo was in the wrong here. Your sobs turned to sniffles soon enough and he decided that he needed to take care of you. He gently moved you off his lap and stood up, holding a hand out to you. The beating of his heart against his rib cage felt painful. He hurt because it hurt him seeing you so sad and his heart ached at the thought that you thought you were never good enough for anyone.

He put on a small comforting smile as he spoke. “Hey sunflower, lets go somewhere more comfortable okay? How does my room in the dorms sound? We could watch movies and you can let out everything judgment free.” He gave you the cute nickname one day when you sprouted the flower and handed it to him after he a particularly rough day. You presented it to him with a smile that rivals the sun and ironically told him that his own smile lit up a room better than said flower. His heart leapt in joy and soar at the memory but he hoped he would never have to use it in such a terrible situation.

You took his hand and he helped you to stand up. A small wavering smile on your soft lips while you held his hand tightly. “That sounds good Sero, I’m so sorry about ruining your shirt. I’ll wash it and return to you tomorrow after you change.” Your voice was heavy with sadness. He was walking the both of you with your fingers intertwined to the UA dorms while you spoke. The distant sounds of shouting from the bakusqaud and explosions filled the air and your wavering smile steadied for a bit after thinking about how hard everyone was chewing him out, especially your ‘sister from another mister’ Mina.

You both arrived at his room, immediately taking off your shoes and making yourself comfy in his hammock while he went to the bathroom to change his clothes. You didn’t even think about leaving or changing until Sero spoke. “I left extra clean clothes in the bathroom incase you wanna change out of your uniform. I know how hard today has been on you so feel free to go in and change if you want to. You also don’t have to worry about cleaning my clothes by the way, I’m doing laundry tomorrow.” His normal friendly tone sending a small spark comfort to your broken heart.

You nodded and said a small thanks as you went to the bathroom and changed into the pair of grey sweatpants and random band tee he set out for you. As you slipped them on, the smell of laundry detergent mixed with his natural scent of earth after a heavy rain shot a nice warmth through your entire body. His clothes were big and so incredibly comfortable that you couldn’t help the small smile that made its way to your face.

You exited the bathroom with a small smile and Sero immediately noticed how cute you were dressed in his clothes. He fought the heat that tried to make its way to his cheeks and ears with the clearing of his throat. He made his way to the beanbag next to his hammock that was facing the tv. He looked at you once again with his signature grin. “So what do you wanna watch?”

You didn’t get a chance to answer his question when the rest of bakusquad burst into his dorm, all scuffed up and dirty. Kiri and Mina immediately crying and tackling you in a bone crushing hug, apologizing and saying you didn’t deserve it. You smiled and squeezed them back and let them cry on your shoulders, you laughed internally when they seemed more upset than you were at moment. They were such good people. Kaminari was in idiot mode so Sero took care of him.

You and the squad spent the rest of night having a sleepover and watching movies, their cheery and energetic attitudes distracted you and you found yourself feeling better. Mina and you had everyone do face masks at one point. The love they all had for you was almost touchable. The warmth in your heart spread throughout your entire being, you forgot about Bakugo for that night.

Sero decided to confess at a later date, once your heart healed along with the help of him and his friends. A loving smile suddenly plastered on his face during a movie roast session going on between you, Kami, and Mina. Kiri patted him on the shoulder and gave him a thumbs up and a bright sharp toothed smile. He smiled back at his red headed friend and gave a small shake of his head.

He was happy for now. Just knowing you were on your way to mending your own heart, and not being alone while doing that. If he was the one to tape together the final pieces, he would be more than happy to do so.

[hiddendreamer67]

Mandy in the Multiverse

Summary: Mandy the writer witch doesn’t know what to write for her prompt, so she goes searching back through her plethora of AUs for inspiration and accidentally stumbles into a few others as well.

(Shoutout to @callboxkat, @lefaystrent and @delimeful for letting me reference their works in this!)

October prompt #23: Witchcraft.

Check out more of my writing at @hiddendreamerwriting!

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Mandy sighed, laying on her back and tossing her pen in the air to catch again. It was dull, lacking the usual shine of inspiration. It seemed she was quickly burning through her magic supply this month. 

Her eyes traveled over to the portal, humming in the corner. Several portals, actually. An entire wall of infinite portals, each leading into a different dimension she had created. But what did it matter? All the portals in the world wouldn’t help the young witch find a good story idea. She needed a new portal.

Mandy paused, catching her pen one last time. Or…she could always do a sequel. And for that, a quick lil’ inspiration trip wouldn’t hurt anyone, right?

“I’ll just pop in for a second.” Mandy grinned, already grabbing her cloak and sprinting through one at random.

A bright light flashed, forcing her to cover her eyes. She blinked the spots from her vision, peering around to find… a pet shop?

“Oh, tiny mers.” Mandy hummed, walking through the aisle ways. “Not exactly original, but-”

“Can I help you, gurl?” Remy the sales clerk interrupted her musing.

“Oh, hey Remy.” Mandy gave a disinterested wave, not even looking over as she peered into the empty tanks. She sighed. “Man, this is so boring. There’s not even anything happening here. Well, except with the cats.”

“We don’t sell cats.” Remy informed her.

“I know.” Mandy adjusted her cloak. She didn’t feel like walking all the way over to Picani’s place of residence just to see the shredded remains of Logan clinging to life, that’d just be depressing. “Don’t worry about it.” Without another word she twirled on her feet, the scenery swapping once more. 

“Alright, where we headed?” Mandy rubbed her hands together, looking around to try and get the lay of the land. It was a wide open field, which didn’t give her many clues- that is, until she saw how dead the grass was and the hole left behind by what must’ve been a beanstalk.

“Aww, I missed it?” Mandy groaned. She looked around, seeing nobody at the bottom of the stalk either. “Well this sucks.  I can’t even tell if this is Virgil’s or Patton’s story. Why does the beanstalk have to come down, anyway? Just let it stay up and eventually consume all the water on Earth.” 

That was an idea, maybe. But today was not the day for mythical eco-terrorism. Instead with a sigh Mandy twirled again, crossing her fingers. “Please something fun, please something fun-”

Unfortunately, her hopes were dashed when she opened her eyes to see generic apartment number 3. “Darn it, just a borrower story.” 

There was a quiet clattering behind her. Mandy turned, seeing a very startled human Logan standing in the kitchen. “I- how- what did you say?”

“Oh dear.” Mandy winced. Logan was always the one with too many questions, no matter the universe. “Um, a borrower? Tiny person about yeigh high?” Mandy held out her hands for scale. “You might have one already in a cage. That, or they’re still in the walls. I don’t really know what stage you’re at.”

Logan’s eyes widened, turning a deadly pale. He glanced back at the living room door anxiously, leaning forwards and lowering his voice. “How much do you know about the little mouse men?”

“The mouse men?” Mandy wrinkled her nose in confusion. Since when did Logan call borrowers ‘mouse men’? That sounded more like Littles, and the only story she knew with Littles was…

Mandy gasped, smacking a hand to her cheek. “This is Kat’s story!” She excitedly whispered. The witch looked down at her own hands in awe, having not been aware she could even do that. “Oh my goodness I could see Littles. Wait should I? What if I break something? No, I shouldn’t, they’re all so depressed right now, and Kat’s Littles are always so skittish.”

“Cat? What’s this about a cat?” Logan was frantically trying to keep up with her logic, to no avail.

“Don’t worry about it.” Mandy said hastily. “Tell them I say hi. Wait don’t, forget you saw anything. Okay. I love you. Bye.”

With these parting words Mandy spun away, eager to get out before she ruined over a year’s worth of careful planning. But this opened a newfound realm of possibilities; what were her limits? How far could she go? She eagerly focused her energy away from her own stories, trying to see if she could breach the wall again.

“...oh great. Another Remy.” Mandy sighed, opening her eyes.

“Gurl you better check yourself before you shrek yourself.” Remy judged her, taking a long sip from his cup. 

Mandy glanced around, taking in the house in disarray. There was a strange amount of potato chip bags and binoculars. On a notebook was a list labelled ‘Vampires?’ where Logan’s name had been written, crossed out, rewritten, repeat.

“Is this Lefay’s Welcome to the Neighborhood fic?” Mandy guessed.

“Yup.” Remy nodded. Mandy wasn’t even surprised Remy had that knowledge; he was some sort of demon of the night anyways here. Or something.

“Good.” Mandy nodded as well. “So I can’t break anything.” 

“Bold of you to assume you’re worthy enough to derail this plot.” Remy raised an eyebrow. “Where you headed?”

“I dunno.” Mandy shrugged, leaning against the couch. She cringed, feeling something sticky beneath her. “I mean not that you lovable trash raccoons aren’t, er, great… but I was kinda aiming for Delimeful.”

“The tiny dragon one?” Remy asked.

Mandy nodded. “I wanna introduce Puff to my dragon Virgil. Who isn’t really a dragon, just raised by dragons, and-”

“We get it, ya’ basic. First door on your left.” Remy interrupted with a point. Mandy paused, before with a shrug opening the door that was Remy’s haphazardly thrown together portal. There was another flash of familiar light, but this time the walls appeared more hazy. Translucent, even.

“So, this is a mind palace.” Mandy let out a low whistle, because she could do that in fiction. “Weird. I don’t work in canon enough, huh?” 

But that wasn’t the focus right now. Instead her attention was drawn to a scuttling in front of her, a little purple dragon caught off guard by her arrival. Mandy grinned, taking the opportunity to lunge and catch him. “Gotcha!”

Puff did not appreciate this gesture, frantically clawing and biting at Mandy and nearly causing the young witch to drop him entirely. 

“Geez, stop struggling, Virgil!” Mandy huffed, readjusting her grip.

“...Virgil?” 

Mandy paused, looking up to see she had an audience. Roman, Patton, and Logan were giving her looks caught between confusion and horror. The dragon in question had frozen, terrified when she said his name.

For a moment Mandy thought she ruined everything, but no recognition dawned on their faces. “Oh right, you guys are pre-accepting anxiety.” Mandy gave a small sigh of relief, the others tensing further. “Don’t worry, it’s just a, uh, nickname. Totally irrelevant. Definitely not something worth pondering or asking Anxiety about. Okay, toodles!”

But as soon as Mandy attempted to spin on her heel with Puff in tow, a searing hot pain overtook her arms. She yelped, dropping the fledgling and spinning into the other realm alone, collapsing with a grimace.

“Okay, no taking things between realms.” Mandy grit her teeth. “Good to know.”

She looked up, her eyes peering through the darkness to see a sword glinting in the meager light, pointed threateningly at her face. Strangely, she hadn’t even heard the movement. That was suspiciously terrifying. 

“State your business.” The not-dragon Virgil threatened. 

Mandy looked down the length of the sword. She looked back up at Virgil. “I was just trying to bring you a present.” Mandy huffed, annoyed that her plan had failed. “It was a dragon version of you. A real one.”

Well, that was not the right thing to say. Mandy yelped, rolling out of the way as the sword came slashing down, clanking loudly against the rock wall.

“Lovely seeing you as always!” Mandy waved, turning on her heel to the sound of cursing behind her. 

The witch gave a sigh of relief, trying to focus her mind again after getting so jittered. It was difficult whenever her creations got away from her, especially when she was at the wrong end of the sword. The Lord only knew how many times her giants got out of hand, putting Mandy in all sorts of compromising situations.

“Think Mandy.” Mandy told herself, continuing to spin as she began to get dizzy, multiple universes passing by and only offering her glimpses: cages, a butterfly wall, the ocean…. And of course the accompanying cast, but that was a bit harder to decipher considering they all shared the same fate. “If you could go anywhere, do anything, focus on that. Where would you go? What would you do?” 

Her focus was shattered as in her dizzy state she took a single step back, breaking the spell and immediately tripping over something alive.

“Mrow!” The white cat hissed, scrambling fearfully up and away from Mandy and into Patton’s lap.

“Oh dear!” Patton gasped, bending down to check on her. “Are you alright?” She took in his light blue robes, recognizing a fellow magic user.

“Yes, I’m fine.” Mandy took his hand, standing up. She looked down at the bristling cat, glaring up at her haughtily. Mandy winced, slowly recognizing this to be her witch AU. “Sorry about your tail, Roman. Also sorry about your allergies, Patton.”

Patton gave her a bewildered look, not so subtly wiping at his nose. The cat hair was clearly getting to him again. “What? It’s just this spring air. Hardly your fault.”

“Right.” Mandy didn’t bother to explain that she was the one who gave him allergies in the first place. She sighed, wishing she could at least cuddle up Roman with his fluffy coat, but Roman looked to be in no mood to accept her apology. “Aristocat.” She muttered. “Are Logan and Virgil around?”

“No, I believe they went out to collect potion ingredients.” Patton explained.

“Ugh why didn’t I just do that?” Mandy smacked herself in the forehead. “I could have just written something about you four doing potion stuff for witchcraft. This is so needlessly complicated.”

“...sorry?” Patton didn’t know how to respond.

“Whatever, I’m getting out of here.” Mandy glanced at the pair one last time. “I suggest inventing magic benadryl. Or getting regular benadryl. I have no idea what time period this actually is because you refuse to go outside.”

With this mystic advice Mandy disappeared, forever on the hunt for that elusive inspiration.

[summerdutkowsky]

the only love i’ve ever known, the only soul i ever saved, come back to me darling

Fandom: The Good Place Ship: Eleanor/Tahani Words: 6281 Genre: Angsty angst (seriously the most painful of angst) Rating: T (there are implied sexy times though) 

Part One (or Ao3 link) // Part Two (or Ao3 link)

Tahani pov of ‘there’s nothing i hear louder than the words i never said’ except way more painful. 

Tahani and Eleanor were soulmates when they were alive but now in “The Good Place” they discover they’re not. They try to move on and accept that fact, thinking it’s better this way. It’s painful to watch the person you love most drift away from you

Title from ‘Chasing Twisters’ by Delta Rae (yes it’s a theme)

As always shoutout to my best friend @bannedfromzoos who cleaned up my mess and without their support I honestly couldn’t do this. Thanks for the confidence my friend

There will be a happy ending part three because I cannot leave them this broken. It’s too mean. Also formal request for you guys to drop in and leave me fluffy prompts and/or cute moments from this timeline that you would want me to expand on because throughout November I’ll be writing little ficlets that fit in this au

Tahani opened her eyes with a start and took in her surroundings, there was so much grey. Too much. She didn’t know if she should be more offended by the horrible drab décor or the fact that she seemed to have been kidnapped, or something of the sort. She had no recollection of how she got here. In fact, the last thing she remembered was riding in the passenger’s seat of Eleanor’s obnoxious, environment killing vehicle. Feeling the rush of anger every time she saw her sister’s name mentioned in the particular editorial she was reading. Then Eleanor patted her knee in sympathy to which she replied that Eleanor should be paying more attention to the road which was met with a trademark Eleanor smile and then… nothing.

Well not nothing, Eleanor’s smile to a grey, sad room.

It was a significant step down.

“Tahani?” An older gentleman stuck his head out of a door to her left and she took a step back, still trying to wrap her head around the situation. “Please, follow me, everything will be fine.”

She took a tentative step toward the man and the Mystery Room, she had no other choice, she supposed. Upon entering the room, she saw it was a small, even sadder, office with filing cabinets lining the wall behind the desk and a lot of plants. “Where am I?”

“You’re in The Good Place.” He must have read the confusion on her face because he elaborated. “When a person dies on Earth they’re taken one of two places. It was decided you belong here, in The Good Place, because of all the generosity you showed on Earth.”

Tahani preened at that. She smoothed her hair and gave her best modest smile, of course she was in The Good Place. Where else would she be? She stopped short. “So… I’m… dead?” Michael nodded. “Can I ask how? The last thing I remember was riding in a vehicle.”

“Yes, well, while you were in the passenger’s seat your driver wasn’t paying attention to the road or the bus coming from the left intersection.” He fiddled with some papers on his desk as Tahani mulled over the words.

Her driver. Eleanor. If she were here then Eleanor must be also, but she was afraid to ask, she knew Eleanor and loved her with every beat of her heart but deep down she knew Eleanor wasn’t a great person. In fact, Eleanor did a lot of bad in her life before they met but it didn’t make Tahani love her any less. She loved her more for learning and growing and trying to become a better person.

But surely Eleanor had changed enough that she had to be here too.

“Is… is Eleanor here? My driver? Eleanor Shellstrop?” She clenched her fists tight at her sides trying to hide all the anxiety she was feeling.

“Janet!” Tahani started when a person suddenly popped into the room next to Michael. “Is there an Eleanor Shellstrop in this neighborhood?”

There was a slight pause, a pause that, to Tahani, felt like a millennium. “There is no record of an Eleanor Shellstrop in The Good Place.”

“Oh.” Tahani didn’t know that feeling one’s heart break was actually possible until that moment.

“Thank you, Janet.” With a pop the person disappeared. “Now that’s not to say that she won’t be at some point though, she could have a complicated case and numbers are still being crunched. She could show up at some point.”

Tahani held onto those words like a lifeline. She didn’t know if she could spend an eternity without Eleanor. She didn’t want to spend a day without her on Earth, the possibility of the rest of time without her seemed unbearable. Torturous.

“In the meantime, let’s show you around the neighborhood, shall we?” Tahani was ushered out of the room and into the bright, beautiful, picture perfect neighborhood that was her new home. She appreciated the quaintness of it and how everyone seemed friendly and eager to know her. Of course, there were things that caught her eye that made her frown, like how there were an extraordinary amount of cookie shops (at least they had one that exclusively sold Eleanor’s favorite, she made note to pick some up before she arrived) and the cheesy milk fountain in the center of the town square. It wasn’t exactly Tahani’s paradise, but it was adequate.

“And this is your soulmate, Jianyu.” For the first time in her life Tahani was struck dumb. Soulmate? Surely there was a mistake, Eleanor was her soulmate. Not this… monk? He looked like a monk at least. As nice as he seemed (and he did seem nice, he bowed to her and had a kind, almost simple smile) he wasn’t Eleanor and that was not acceptable. Before she could protest Michael disappeared leaving her alone with a stranger.

***

The days that followed were strained at best and outright nightmarish at worst. Tahani loved her house but she kept getting lost only to be found in a bathroom (always a bathroom, there were so many bathrooms) hours later by Jianyu. He would offer her his hand which she would brush away testily, smooth the front of her dress, and storm out after him. She should feel bad for being so cold, he had as much of a choice about his soulmate as she did, but she couldn’t help it. A piece of her was missing and she didn’t know if she would ever get it back.

Tahani often reflected in those days in the silence of her big house, on the moment of her death. It was the last happy moment she had to cling to and she was going to cling to it for all she was worth.

Especially if it was the last moment she had with Eleanor.

She felt so comfortable then, how right the moment was. She remembered, just before the blackness, she was never more at peace with herself and her life than in that moment. They had just run to the liquor store for Eleanor’s weekly haul (though it wasn’t nearly as much as that first day, she had cut back quite a lot since they had been together). Tahani always found that weirdly sweet Eleanor would go out of her way to go to the same store. The store where they had met. Now that they had moved in together the store was almost inconvenient to go to but Eleanor always made the trip.

Tahani’s legs were tucked under her in the passenger’s seat, leaning on the center console of the monstrous vehicle with the magazine propped up on her lap. Eleanor’s hand was warming her thigh (she had pushed up Tahani’s dress a couple of inches above her knee just so she could have skin to skin contact and that never failed to make Tahani’s heart race, even after all this time) her thumb traced soothing circles on the inside of her thigh every time Tahani tensed and huffed about seeing Kamilah’s name.

Tahani was struck then, in the low evening light behind Eleanor’s head. She had never let her guard down like this. Had someone hang on her every word like Eleanor was. Had someone she loved and loved her back. They hadn’t said it yet but she felt it. It was on the tip of her tongue but instead she said, “Do pay more attention to the road, darling, this is just nonsense.”

“It’s not nonsense if it’s bothering you babe.” That blinding smile. That smile that made all of Tahani’s anxieties and insecurities vanish. The one that she knew was genuine and real and meant only for her. The one that made her feel like everything was okay and she could just be herself, not the Tahani everyone expected. “Now let’s get home and I’ll make you forget all about that stupid magazine. Watch me beat this yellow light.”

She never got to tell Eleanor how much that moment meant to her. She never got to tell Eleanor she loved her and it was a heavy burden she would carry with her for the rest of eternity.

If only she could see Eleanor one more time.

***

It felt like weeks before she felt okay enough to talk to Jianyu. At first it was a passing hello, to which he would only respond with a slight bow of his head. She was truly grateful for him and the space he allowed her. He never pushed his presence on her and it was only after the first few times they spoke that she realized he never spoke a word since she had known him. At first, she thought it was because he was mad at her for being so cold at first, but she soon caught on to the fact he never spoke. To anyone. Not even a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ response, but Janet informed her that Jianyu was in fact a Taiwanese monk who took a vow of silence he was even carrying over to the afterlife.

Surely there must have been a mistake. If there was a whole scientific method to this soulmate business then how did she get paired with the only person in The Good Place who didn’t speak. Another notch in the curious column.

Already under that column? Why her soulmate was a man. Being with Eleanor on Earth really helped her accept that side of herself, she never broadcasted it, it wasn’t like after her first time with Eleanor she screamed from the top of the building she was a lesbian but she sure as hell wanted to. No, it was a subtle acceptance, Eleanor helped her see that what she felt with men was nothing more than an affection at their attention. She just figured since this whole soulmate thing was real, if she wasn’t with Eleanor then surely it would have been another woman (it wouldn’t have been much better, but it would have made more sense).

She kept quiet though, just filed away these curiosities silently and went about her afterlife.

***

It took another few weeks for her to finally get out of her house and explore her neighborhood. Which actually meant networking, building relationships with these people she would be spending eternity with. She couldn’t care less about the seemingly endless cookie shops (with names, she noted, that would make Eleanor want to throw something), she was more interested in the people and what kind of information they had on this curious place and situation they were all in.

The frustrating thing was that no one had any answers. Or were particularly adept at dodging the questions. She talked to all of her neighbors and shop owners and started a little system of important people like she had on Earth but still no answers about why some things were the way they were, or if they heard of a woman named Eleanor. So, to take her mind off her spinning thoughts she decided to do the one thing she did best, throw a party.

A “Welcome to the Neighborhood Tahani and Jianyu” party, since no one else seemed to have one of those planned. And anyway, it would have paled in comparison to hers.

She threw herself into making sure this party was up to Tahani levels of greatness. It was a nice distraction from thinking about all the strange things she noticed going on, and the lack of Eleanor of course.

Until it wasn’t.

Until she was very certain she spotted a familiar blonde head walking quickly in the other direction, away from the milk fountain, and she was bustled along by the throngs of helpers she enlisted. Hope bloomed in her chest. Eleanor. It had to be, she would know that stature, those clothes, that walk anywhere. Eleanor was here and it was only a matter of time before they were together again.

Until they weren’t.

Days passed and she heard nothing from Michael or Janet or Eleanor herself. She was so certain it had been her. She would have bet her house on it, but maybe it wasn’t. Maybe it was just wishful thinking. She told Jianyu as much and was met with a caring pat on the back and an understanding nod. She appreciated him even more lately, despite not speaking she felt his care and support and he never pushed their relationship past friendship. It was all she could ask.

The more she went out the more she thought she saw Eleanor, in a cookie shop, in the alley between buildings, in the gym (that one surely couldn’t be her). But she was always so close but so far and moving further away. It got to the point where Tahani felt like she was playing Where’s Waldo but with more heartbreaking results.

On the day of the party she refused to leave the house. She had too much to do and while she longed to just glimpse Maybe-Eleanor it was too close to leave it in the hands of people she really didn’t trust fully. She put the finishing touches on the balloons and petting zoos and all of the tennis courts. She asked Janet for a shrimp cocktail bar because if anything would bring Eleanor around it would be that and soon she stood by the door. Jianyu on her arm, greeting people with the fakest smile she could muster.

Until she thought she caught a glimpse of Maybe-Eleanor by the front door, on her way out.

She chased the shadow to the front lawn only to find it was one of her neighbors from a few blocks over. The hope she felt building in her chest deflated when she fell onto the bench next to her front patio. That was the thing, she was hoping (always hoping) against all odds that Eleanor would somehow make it here with her and this whole soulmate fiasco would be sorted out properly. That somehow Eleanor turned her life around enough to end up in The Good Place with her. Tahani didn’t think that at the end she was Bad Place material, maybe Middle Place (if that were a thing) for sure that, but surely, they had saved each other, turned each other’s lives around so they both ended up here. Eleanor made her a better, calmer person just as she thought she made Eleanor a little more giving, and gave her a sense of decorum. Maybe that wasn’t enough though, maybe she wasn’t enough to save Eleanor, maybe she just was cursed to never be enough.

She never gave up hope these little sightings she had were more than just wishful thinking though.

The party went on around her, without a single hitch.

***

The only other thing Tahani took pride in and cared about, aside from her fabulous parties, were her gardens. If she had the most lavish house in The Good Place the gardens had to match. Not only that, the flowers reminded her of Eleanor, of their apartment on Earth. Eleanor had put up such a fuss when the first few plants were brought in but soon Tahani noticed Eleanor tending to them, watering them, making sure they had proper sun. Eventually Eleanor was the one bringing Tahani plants for her little office she set up in the corner of their apartment to make things brighter, and it may have taken a while but she admitted, out loud, they made the place smell better. Which is why Tahani took one day a week to maintain the flowers in the front lawn, near the drive. She stepped out that morning in her favorite gardening hat and blue dress, ready for inspection and trimming where necessary. It was The Good Place, however, so of course little had to be done.

Jianyu stepped out soon after her, as he usually did, to at least keep her company. She loved throwing anecdotes about her life his way and although he would never return words to her, she was grateful for the companionship. He plucked one of her freshest roses and handed it to her, she appreciated the gesture, but her brain was screaming in horror at her now imperfect plant. “Thank you, Jianyu, that’s very kind.” She leaned down and kissed him quickly on the cheek, tucking the flower away in the basket of garden tools at her feet.

That’s when she heard it. A choked sob? No. A gasp? Something in-between definitely and she spun on her heel to face her gate where the sound originated. The air was knocked from her lungs so quickly she thought she may just pass out. There at the end of her drive looking as beautiful as ever was Eleanor. Her Eleanor. It felt like the world, stopped just for them.

“Eleanor?”

But then everything crashed down around her because Eleanor was walking away, practically running away and Tahani couldn’t, wouldn’t, let that happen. Not when she was so close to her own personal Good Place. She took off down her driveway and was thankful for her long legs because in no time she caught up and stopped Eleanor in the middle of her street like one of those terribly romantic movies she made them watch on Earth. “It is you. My god you are real.” Tahani had to touch. She couldn’t stop her hands from moving to every exposed piece of skin she could reach, through the soft golden hair she remembered nightly. It was as if nothing had changed, she cupped Eleanor’s face, and took in those too blue eyes. This right here, with Eleanor in her arms like this, this was her Good Place. “I… I thought I saw you, in the square by that cheap little milk fountain but I thought I was just seeing things. How?” She didn’t know what she was questioning, she didn’t know a lot of things at that moment, she barely remembered how to breathe.

“Apparently, when you said I should pay more attention to the road I actually should have listened.”

“No, I know that how. Michael told me that how. I mean,” She didn’t know what she meant, her mind was going too quickly to make sense of everything.

“Tahani al Jamil at a loss for words. I never thought I’d live to see the day.” A pause. “Well, I guess technically I never did get to live to see the day, but you know.” Tahani laughed. It was so wonderfully Eleanor to break the moment with a joke, but there was also something heavy behind it. “So, um, nice place you got here. Very you.” Tahani shrugged, she supposed it was her but a part of her really missed their quaint little apartment back on Earth. Then the bomb dropped at her feet. “Nice soulmate too. He looks like a nice dude.”

Guilt sunk deep in Tahani’s stomach. Guilt for what she had no idea but seeing the pain so clear on Eleanor’s face was too much. “Jianyu. Yes, he’s, he’s a Taiwanese monk. Um, apparently he’s taken a vow of silence because he hasn’t said one word to me since we got here but he’s very kind and doting.” She felt her throat get thick with emotion. This forking soulmate business was complete and utter nonsense. How can he be her soulmate when her real one was standing right in front of her? Her soulmate that was in obvious pain. Pain she wanted so badly to make go away.

But then Eleanor took a step back away from her. “I’m glad, you deserve good things Tahani. Even if I can’t be the one to give them to you. I’m glad you’re not alone.”

“Eleanor, why…” Why was she just walking away? Why didn’t she come here sooner? Why was she looking like she wanted to run? There were so many whys.

Instead of answering any of them, Eleanor just took another step back and Tahani folded in on herself like she had just been punched. Or a piece of her had been ripped out. Which she supposed in a way it had. “Just, be happy Tahani.”

I’m glad you’re not alone. Those words echoed in her head because she felt more alone now than ever. Tahani hated being alone more than anything. Sure, she hated other things, a lot of things actually (for example: her sister; when her celebrity friends were in a feud and she had to choose sides;her sister;when her parties didn’t get the rave reviews they deserved; her bloody sister) but being alone? That was number one.

And ever since she watched Eleanor walk away from her she felt so achingly alone.

She had her house, she had friends, a neighborhood that adored her, and she had her… well whatever Jianyu was. She still didn’t feel right calling him soulmate, that title was reserved for the woman that left her standing in the street. Tahani supposed it always would be Eleanor, even after everything Michael told her about the algorithm nonsense. But despite having everything she could ever want, she didn’t have Eleanor, and nothing filled that hollow in her chest.

Tahani stood rooted to the spot until she couldn’t see Eleanor anymore and the sun was setting low behind her. Her cheeks were streaked with tears that wouldn’t stop no matter how hard she wished they would. She just wanted Eleanor to turn around, just for a second, to give her some hope to hold on to. Some hope that they weren’t done. That they would hold each other again.

She jumped when she felt a gentle touch on her lower back and shrank away when she saw it was Jianyu. She felt bad about it, really, she did, he treated her kindly and didn’t deserve her hesitations. He didn’t deserve to be pushed away but right now her world was in a tailspin that she couldn’t figure how to right and his presence wasn’t helping.

Tahani gently dabbed her cheeks with her handkerchief and let Jianyu lead her back in the house. “That was Eleanor.” She watched his eyebrows rise in acknowledgement, he knew all about her, he knew all about them on Earth. Tahani talked about Eleanor and their relationship every day since she accepted the situation in which she was placed.

“Did I ever tell you how we met?” She asked him as he led her to the more private sitting room (which was to say the fourth door on the left when you turned the first right corner, she really did love this house but it was such a maze sometimes). It was a silly question to ask because of course she did, she told every story there ever was to tell about the two of them. But holding Eleanor, even for a fleeting moment just mere moments ago, she needed to do something. Cling to anything she could, the smell of lavender in Eleanor’s hair, the feel of her in her arms, anything. Any memories she could.

“It was a Thursday afternoon in a shabby little liquor store.” She let Jianyu get comfortable on his pillow across from her before she poured them each a cup of tea. She knew neither of them were going to drink it, it was more of a distraction for her hands than anything. “I happened upon this little hole in the wall store and was hoping they would be kind enough to cut the price of some spirits if I bought them in bulk for a fundraiser I was throwing for an environmental cause when I heard this irritated noise from behind me.” She remembered hearing an annoyed scoff at her haggling, a distinct ‘move it or lose it giraffe’ was uttered and Tahani spun on her heel. “Just as I was about to give this person a piece of my mind I was knocked dumb.” She laughed, a sad breathy thing. “I know! Me. Speechless!”

She rolled her eyes at Jianyu’s sarcastic eyebrow raise, he may not speak but her could tell a story with his facial expressions. “I was though because I was face to face with this tiny, beautiful ball of fury.” My god was she beautiful. Tahani thought back to that day and felt her heart flutter just as fast now as it did that day. “Just the way her passion flared and her stunning eyes. Oh, it was poetry, Jianyu, I was struck.” She laughed to herself because Eleanor was the only person in the world that could be gorgeous when fighting about her booze.

She took the warm cup in her hands and closed her eyes, picturing the day clearly in her mind. “I wasn’t fool enough to think I would ever see her again. I thought I was forever bound to that dreadful ‘if only’ feeling.” She couldn’t help the smiled that tugged at her lips at the next thought. “It shouldn’t have surprised me when she showed up to the gala. It wasn’t a pleasant surprise at first because she pulled up to an environment gala in the most horrendous air choking vehicle ever created but as soon as I saw her throw her keys at the valet I couldn’t help but laugh. It just felt like it was meant to be.” Tahani still found it funny how destiny worked, that this tiny little ball of fire, this person who was so opposite of me, that stood for just about everything I wanted to change in the world. “She was going to be it for me. I knew it deep down.” She put a hand over her heart and opened her eyes to see Jianyu smiling at her. “I was so taken with her bravado I asked her to take me to dinner the following weekend. It remains the best first date I’ve ever been on.”

Jianyu smiled gently at her, in his sweet simple way and she continued. “You know, before Eleanor I had never been in a relationship with a woman.” She paused. “I mean, there had maybe been only one serious relationship before her anyway, he was a Prince of a small island, but that doesn’t matter.” She let the heat from the tea soak into her hands. “I couldn’t understand why it didn’t work, but then I met Eleanor and it all clicked.” She squeezed the cup in her hand, this precious fragile thing, just like she was feeling. “After the first date we continued to see each other, more and more frequently.”

Tahani smiled at the thought. “It was obvious that relationships weren’t a thing Eleanor was familiar with because before she left the morning after our first real date she turned to me and said, ‘hey hot stuff, wanna do this again?’” Tahani’s voice mocked a poor American accent but it made Jianyu choke out a laugh, so it was worth it. “I kissed her on the cheek and sent her on her way.” That may have been a tiny white lie. She may or may not have pulled Eleanor back into her apartment and made out with her like a teenager pressed up against her front door, but what Jianyu didn’t know wouldn’t kill him.

“The first time I introduced her as my girlfriend I thought that was it.” Tahani set the cup of tea back on the tray, undrunk. “I thought she would bolt first chance she got, but she stayed. And not only did she stay, she stood up to my parents.” An incredulous laugh bubbled from her lips remembering the moment. “It was a fundraiser for saving the whales and it was stunning, of course, and every party I threw I would send an invitation my parents’ way just in case.”

A little half shrug, as if she didn’t care, but she knew her face betrayed her longing for acceptance. “Well they happened to be in town that day, so they showed up and I was just so proud. Just bursting, Jianyu! I had this wonderful fundraiser that was on par to be my biggest money-raiser to date, I looked stunning, and I had the most beautiful woman in the room as my date. I had been told as such by several famous actors that night. Everything was wonderful, and my parents showed up without my beloved sister.” Her voice choked on the word. “I had to pull Eleanor away from the shrimp, but it was worth it because my parents were there!I was on cloud nine and then I said ‘Mum, Dad, this is my girlfriend Eleanor.’ I felt her tense next to me and I held my breath just waiting for the best thing in my life to leave me like always.” Tahani swallowed hard and thought back to ten minutes ago when she watched Eleanor walk away. The best thing in her life, and afterlife, leaving her, like she was always afraid of.

“But then my dad said some awful thing, truly horrible. It never bothered them when Kamilah had a girlfriend, but god forbid I was happy. So he finished his nonsense and I waited. I waited for either of them to leave or for Eleanor to run but instead she took my hand, like she had done so many times before, pulled me tight against her and kissed me. Can you imagine? Right there in front of my parents she kissed me for all she was worth. She had insisted I wear flats that night and she wear heels so we were a little more close in height.” Tahani laughed, a sad breathy thing. “And then she pulled me onto the dance floor. That was the last I had ever heard from my parents, and after that I truly didn’t care. I had everything I needed in Eleanor.”

Tahani sighed again, she still hoped that Eleanor had changed her mind and she would be there. “I think that’s enough reminiscing for the night. It’s time to start my night routine.” She rose from the sofa and bid Jianyu a good night. She was thankful her tears held off long enough until she found herself alone in her bedroom. Jianyu was a caring man, and she cried in front of him often, but that didn’t mean she liked doing it. Given the choice she would much rather wallow in her misery by herself.

She crawled into her king-sized bed alone, as she had done every night since arriving here, and let her thoughts wander to Eleanor. She picked up where she left off in the story with Jianyu, this next part wasn’t for him, that night, that memory was for her and Eleanor alone. She reached over to the cold side of her bed, remembering that night after their first date she could almost imagine Eleanor’s warmth in those luxurious sheets with her.

Tahani closed her eyes and remembered the feeling of Eleanor’s body on hers, of every sense just overwhelmed with everything Eleanor, to the point Tahani thought she would drown. Happily, so. She had never felt so much pleasure all at once, no one had ever made her feel so good. She laced her fingers tight in Eleanor’s soft, golden hair afraid that if she let go it would all go away, the feeling of Eleanor’s tongue on her and the hair in her hands being the only thing to anchor her to the moment. She remembered the shiver and the look in those blue eyes when she came with Eleanor’s name on her lips, like a prayer. A look in those eyes that said she felt something too.

She was too spent to keep her eyes open, but she felt the soft kisses Eleanor placed on her scattered freckles and birthmarks, so reverent, so gentle and caring. So, unlike the firecracker she had encountered at the gala and even on their date. Feelings weren’t a part of this going into the night, Tahani was sure of that, but something shifted, but she really hoped Eleanor couldn’t feel her heart race with every kiss. She didn’t want to be the one to break first.

She opened her eyes to the dim light in her room and the (always) cold side of her bed and felt her eyes burn.

She cried herself to sleep that night as she had every night since she arrived, except now she knew Eleanor was here and her bed was still empty.

And that was worse.

***

Tahani woke from another restless sleep, chest and eyes still aching from the night before. Except now in addition to the pain she had anger. A deep anger building. How long had Eleanor been here and she never came to look? How could she just walk away from what they had when they were alive? How dare she just assume that Tahani was happy without her? Okay so the last one wasn’t really anger, more disbelief but still.

Was what they had on Earth even real?

She felt her stomach roll at the thought. Her love, her heart, her everything on Earth, everything she held dear and true. It couldn’t be a lie, she wouldn’t accept that.

Tahani regretfully pulled herself out of her bed, every cell in her body screamed at her to just stay put, that one day wallowing in her bed wouldn’t hurt. But she had seen Eleanor, she didn’t want to stay away, she had gotten a taste and she wanted more. Needed more. So she pulled herself out of bed and trudged her way through her morning routine; shower, makeup, and outfit decision one (and two and three, she wanted to look her absolute best). She would call Janet for breakfast but her stomach was too out of sorts that morning to even think about food. Eleanor was the only thing on her mind.

She didn’t even say good morning to Jianyu before she was out the door and heading quickly towards the town center. She had no real idea where Eleanor lived or she would go there but she figured waiting, conveniently, near her favorite cookie place would be a safe bet. So that’s what she did, she found a table outside a shop across the square and sat and waited. And waited. And waited. And at some point during her wait Jianyu showed up with a latte for her and an oversized cookie for himself. And just when she thought it was hopeless she caught a wisp of blonde hair and plaid button down and Tahani was up and at the door behind Eleanor.

There was so much she wanted to ask, to say, anything to hold onto what little connection she had but Eleanor, as stubborn as ever, ignored her very presence. Not even a glance her way. So Tahani put on her bravest smile, tucked her arm around Jianyu’s, and let him lead the way through the bustling town square.

The next few days were more of the same, Tahani conveniently bumping into Eleanor at cookie shops or the fountain or the place that doubled as a library (which they both knew neither would step foot in otherwise), only to get painfully brushed aside. Tahani wanted to grab her and shake her and ask why she was doing this. Why she wasn’t even trying. But truth be told she was afraid of the answer.

Soon she stopped going to the square every day and instead went once a week for a month. She was numb from head to toe every time she saw Eleanor pointedly not looking her way.

A week after that she stopped going altogether.

***

“Tahani?” A soft voice from behind her made Tahani jump. She thought she was alone in the house, or Jianyu was there but… “there’s something I should tell you.”

Tahani spun on the chaise to face Jianyu, who actually spoke words to her for the first time since they had been together. “Jianyu?”

“That’s something you should know. My name, isn’t Jianyu, it’s Jason. I’m not a monk, I’m a pre-successful DJ from Jacksonville.” He paused and cupped his hands around his mouth. “Go Jags!” Tahani looked on in horror. “I don’t think I’m supposed to be here, I think this may be some kind of prank show or something. I’m not sure but I just couldn’t lie anymore, not talking is exhausting.”

“Jia- Jason.” Tahani sat up straighter in her seat, suddenly frightened but curious. “We’re dead and this is The Good Pla-” Wait, she thought, if Jianyu wasn’t Jianyu, if… she struggled with her thoughts for a second. Bad Place. “Jia- Jason. If you’re who you say you are, and Eleanor is...” If Eleanor was here (she loved Eleanor with everything she was but she had to admit The Good Place was probably not the first choice for her), and Jason was Jason and the exact opposite of who they assumed he was. This most assuredly wasn’t The Good Place. She didn’t know what that meant for her and her soul and she really didn’t care. She just felt relief. That meant the soulmate nonsense was just that. Nonsense. She and Jason weren’t meant to be together, obviously, that meant that she and Eleanor were being tortured by being separated. Told they couldn’t be together, that everything they had was a lie. Everything suddenly made sense. “This is The Bad Place.” She whispered more to herself.

She’d rather spend an eternity in The Bad Place with Eleanor than one more second without her in supposed paradise.

She stood suddenly, knocking a few throw pillows to the ground. “I have to find Eleano-”

SNAP!

[boikawa]

Study Crazy

Study Crazy

Peter Parker x Reader

Requested: Yes by my babe Jord❤️ ( @spideyydarling )

Warnings: Kidnapping, mild torture, injured reader

Word Count: 1323

A/N: Um, I’m trying to get this out quickly but I’m sorry if this takes reallllllllyy long. I’m in Trumpland at a resort so my wifi is cRAP.

31: “My life would be so boring if you weren’t in it.”

74: “H-How long were you standing there?”

Make a request from the 99 Prompts List.

Also, shoutout to Lauren (@thewildhearted on Wattpad and @polaroidholland on Tumblr) for helping me with some of the basic plot.

Peter Parker Tag List: @thisrandombitch @maria-francis

Everything Tag List: @tinyplanet-explorers 

“What the hell are you doing?”

I whip around to see Peter standing near my window, Spider-Man uniform on, mask off.

“Studying!” I grin before moving back to my pile of textbooks.

“How the hell are you supposed to study more than one subject at a time?”

He hit his chest to take of the suit before walking over to me and pulling on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt.

“Oh! Well you see-”

“No.” Peter comes over and takes away all the textbooks and notebooks except for the ones labelled, ‘Chemistry’.

“H-Hey! I need those!” I jump up and try to get them but he put them all in a pile by my wall and uses his webs to stick them there.

“No you don’t. Now let’s study why don’t we?”

“That’s what I was doing dumbshit.” I plopped back into my desk chair and he sat near me on my bed.

“You’ll never remember anything, studying like that.” He pulled out his Chemistry notes and opened it to one of the bookmarked pages. “Ok, let’s start.”

“Ok Y/n. I think we’ve been studying long enough.”

He stood up and came over to close my textbook.

“Now I am going to go get some coffee for us and you are going to stay here.”  With that he ran out the door.

I pulled out my phone and called Michelle as soon as I heard the door slam.

“Hey y/n! What’s up?”

“Peters over helping me with homework and I don’t think I can take it much longer.”

I heard a laugh from the other side of the phone.

“Take what? The homework or Peters, and I’m quoting you here, his, ‘Fabulously fluffy hair of which I would KILL to play with.’ You be help y/n.” She started snickering through the phone.

“Shut up MJ. Just because I totally like my best friend does not mean that I can’t focus around him and his hair.”

“What?” I turn around to see Peter standing behind me, and I almost drop the phone.

“Shit.”

“You know what y/n? I’m just gonna-”

“MJ don’t you dare-”

“Bye y/n!” And then the phone line went dead.

“I-I um, I forgot my money. I left it in your room.”

I scratched my neck and shifted my weight.  “H-how long were you standing there?”

He grins nervously. “Long enough to say that, I like my best friend too.”

He walks towards me. “Oh really?” I laugh.

“Yeah,” and he cups my face and pulls me into a light kiss. I wrap my hands around his neck and kiss back.

He pulls away and smiles. Suddenly sirens came racing down the street.

“We’ll continue this later!”

Walking home from school by myself was never something I enjoyed.  The neighborhood was scary for a girl by herself.  Normally I walked home with Peter and Ned, or at least halfway with Michelle.  

But they all had Mathletes today, so I was stuck walking home alone. (Lmao it’s Kevin guys. N-nevermind)

I turned the corner and made my way through the roughest part of the walk.  It was right before Michelle’s house so it wasn’t often I walked through here alone.

I carefully made my way down the street, the lights had been out for years and no one had fixed them. Needles and empty pill bottles littered the ground.  I carefully made my way past two figure who were mid-brawl on the ground.  I picked up my pace when I noticed the silverish gleam of a blade.

I had just made it past the corner when two hands roughly grabbed my arms from behind and held me up slightly off the ground. I struggle and tried to kick the person but someone came in front. They were wearing a black mask over their face and I can only assume the person behind me had a similar mask.  

The person in front came up and held a cloth against my face.  I felt my body go limp and they moved over to the side of the road.

A car van opened and I was roughly tossed inside.  The door slammed sut and I heard a lock click into place.

Dammit.

I woke up in darkness. I went to stand from my seated position when i felt the ropes digging into my wrists and remembered the people in the masks who put me in the van.

Kidnapped.

That was the first thing that came to mind.

I immediately started struggling, trying to fumble my hands around the ropes so I could find some way to get out.

But these people were smarter than that. I could tell by the way the ropes were angled that the knot was tied in front of me, where neither my hands or mouth could reach.

Shit.

Suddenly a high pitched noise came into the room through what I assumed were speakers. It was turned on what I guessed was the highest volume.

I struggled to get my head in a position that blocked out the sound but that was hard with my hands tied.

After struggled through the sounds for hours they stopped. It still rang in my ear but it wasn’t actually playing anymore.

The door opened and a man walked in. He was dressed in a mask like the others.

He turned on the lights and suddenly everything was bright.  After a few seconds I saw it.

There was water pouring into the room from a small corner. I was inside a box.

I started screaming and yelling as loud as I could, but of course no one could hear me.

The water was up to my elbows. I was struggling to at least get one of my hands out but I couldn’t.  I looked up when I heard a bang.

Suddenly, the metal door at the end of the room flew inwards.  I squinted to see who it was and recognized Peter, in his suit.  He punched the guy standing near the door and knocked him out.

“Peter!” I screamed as the water threatened to cover my mouth.

His head snapped over to mine and he ran to the box. He climbed all around it looking for someway to open it. But there wasn’t one.  Peter took a glance at me before sprinting out the door.

He came running back in with a fire extinguisher and slammed the end of it against the glass.

He hit it twice before dropping the cannister.  At this point I was holding my breath as the water was over my head.

Peter backed up and launched a ball of webbing at the glass. It started beeping and exploded, taking the front class with it.  The water rushed out and Peter rushed up to untie my ropes. He undid them and carried me over to the side of the room.

“Y/n what happened? You look like hell!” He brushed my hair out of my face and looked at me worriedly.

“Peter I’m fine, you need stop worrying so much.”

“Stop worrying so much?  Y/n, my life would be so boring if you weren’t in it.” He smiled down at me.  “Y/n I love you.  And I will always love you. I have the right to worry.”

I grinned at him.

“I love you too.”

[nobravery]

The Neighbor — Part. I

a Shawn Mendes Series.

Requested: No.

A/N: Finally I’m posting something. I was inspired at the very beginning but I believe that it’s getting worse and worse this story, rip it’s completely unrealistic whereas I always write in a way as realistic as possible. But never mind, I had fun. It’s always a pleasure for me to write. Also big shoutout to @babyshawwn because she’s the Queen of the Fics, and @illumendes my fav cunt who told me to go on. Ah, and @saysweartogod for your name.

WordCount: 3,815

Two weeks later. It was almost midday. That day, the sun didn’t put in an appearance, but it wasn’t raining for all that. It was just kinda cloudy. y/n was working on her classes in her bedroom, while Emily was keeping an eye on the spaghetti carbonara, reading some school books and with music in her headphones. Both were very concentrating, when y/n thought she heard someone knocking at the door. She didn’t hear anything more, so she shrugged her shoulders and plunged back into her sheets of paper. But she heard the knock again. So she frowned, before calling Emily from her bedroom. Obviously the latter didn’t hear whatever, but y/n ignored that. « Emily, someone’s knocking, go and answer the door! she yelled a little louder. » No answer from Emily. Emily, I’m going to kill you, she thought. Then she stood up, came out of her bedroom and quickened her step; entering the living-room, she immediately saw Emily who acted as if nothing was happening. But when she saw y/n, she removed her headphones quickly. « Hey y/n, is there a prob? – Yeah, I called you like two or three times but obviously you didn’t hear, I understand why now. Someone’s knocking at the door, y/n informed eventually. – Ah? Who’s this? the other inquired. – I don’t know, I’ll get it. » So straight away y/n rushed to the door, not wanting the person on the doorway to wait even more. She unlocked it, pressed the handle and finally opened the door. The guy in front of her was so tall that she had to raise her head to look at him. His hair was brown, curly, nicely done and looked very soft. Clad in a white tshirt, he was smiling at y/n; his teeth were perfectly lined up and as white as his tshirt. His mandible was well-traced as well and she could guess that his zygomatic bone was too. Hands in his jeans pockets, his brown eyes were looking at her, and she noticed it a few seconds later. « Hum, hello? she managed to say finally with a smile. How may I help you? » Then she heard Emily who was still in the kitchen saying something like « Who’s that? ». Meanwhile, the guy was smiling even more. « Well, I’m your new neighbor and I didn’t have the time at all to buy sugar. I was wondering if you had some. » The young girl was gazing out at him, and frowned weakly at a moment, but still smiling. « Yeah, we have sugar for sure. Come in, don’t stay outside the door. » So the guy complied and immediately Emily joined them near the entrance. « Hello! the newcomer said. What’s up there? – Euh… » Definitely y/n was looking for his name that she didn’t know yet, turning her forefinger in circles and pressing her lips together. « Oh sorry. Shawn. I’m Shawn, he saved her eventually. I was wondering if you had some sugar, he explained to Emily. » y/n approved with a nod, while her friend had her eyes wide open, meaning she understood. « Okay, Shawn, I’ll get it, I’ll get you what you want. » She dashed towards the little cupboard above the sink, and finally grabbed the sugar. She rejoined the two others after. « Here is it, she declared, holding the sugar box out to Shawn. » He took it right away, and he thanked her with a smile. « I’m Emily. And this is y/n who let you in. – Nice to meet you, he greeted. Have you been longer here? » Emily and y/n looked each other in the eyes, then y/n finally replied. « No, we’ve been here for a little more than two weeks. We just settled. – We’re there for studies, added her flatmate. For a year. We’re not even from Canada. – Wow, I see, and what do you study? Do you enjoy Toronto? » As Emily was going to have a quick look at the spaghetti before she could forget them, she let y/n and Shawn carried on the conversation. « Criminology is our major, Anthropology our minor. Both are interesting. » With that, Emily who was still hearing what her bestie said, came back a few seconds later. « We do enjoy Toronto, she continued, although we don’t know everything yet. But the vibe looks cool there. – Yeah it is, the young boy simply answered. » All three had been talking for two little minutes about Canada and especially Toronto and U of T, before the time when Shawn announced that he had to leave. He greeted his neighbors, having a final talk with them and finally joined the door; the girls went with him. « Hope to see you soon! he called once he crossed the doorstep. – Obviously, you live just nearby, Emily replied. – Yes, true but I’m leaving soon. – Vacation? questioned y/n. » Shawn laughed a bit then smiled. « Not really, but let’s consider that yes. – Oh okay, well, Emily said. When will you leave? – In four or five days. – Fine, I hope you’ll enjoy! » He smiled by way of thanks, told his two neighbors that he will go past again to give them back the sugar box and a few seconds after, he got back to his door and returned home. The girls, who just closed their door, could hear his one shut. While y/n was on her way to set the table for lunch, her friend had still her hand leaning against the door, thinking. « You’re coming? y/n asked her. Lunch is ready right now! » Emily complied and finally took a seat opposite her best friend who was serving them with pasta. Then y/n immediately noticed that she was kinda preoccupied. « What are you thinking about? she inquired when she took a seat as well. » Emily chewed before answering. « I don’t know, didn’t you have a feeling of déjà-vu? I mean, when you saw the guy. – Ah, Shawn? No, why? I should have? This is absurd, Em, we don’t know anybody here. Moreover I don’t know any Shawn. » Nevertheless y/n was thinking about what her flatmate said, in vain, when the latter replied to her. « I know that, me neither, but I’ve the impression that I’ve already seen him somewhere. Never mind, I’m probably too tired. »

An hour later, the two girls were playing a game of chess on the table when they heard a knock at the door. « This must be Shawn. I’ll get it again, declared y/n. » Emily nodded. Meanwhile, the other reached the door and opened it. Indeed, it was Shawn on the doorstep, the sugar box in his hand. « I didn’t want to bother you earlier, so here I am. Thanks for the sugar, he said, giving it back to y/n. – You’re welcome, we can help each other, among neighbors. » They smiled at each other. « By the way, maybe you already know it but it’s Canada Day in two days, I’m going to celebrate it with some friends, I wanted to know if you wanted to join us, if you don’t mind, of course. » At the time, the young girl said nothing, because she didn’t know what to answer, quite simply. So she called Emily out and the latter came, practically straight away. « What’s going on? Is everything okay? » Then y/n beckoned to Shawn to repeat what he had said just before, so he did it, asking again in front of the two flatmates. When y/n seemed hesitant about accepting, and unlike her Emily looked completely in. « Hey, come on! she encouraged. Let’s have fun for once. » y/n thought a bit, rolled her eyes and finally she gave in. « Well, Shawn spoke, I’m delighted you have accepted, I’ll see you in two days so! » Then they said goodbye to each other and all of them returned to their respective apartments. Emily and y/n went back to their seats and to their game of chess. « It’ll be cool, we will have fun in two days, Em said as her mate was focusing on the game. – Hum hum, yes! she replied while moving one of her two knights. I guess so. » In actual fact, y/n wasn’t the one who had often parties — which didn’t mean that she didn’t like parties —, contrary to her best friend, who had always said that y/n didn’t know how to have fun whereas it was actually wrong, and who never missed the opportunity to live it up and to hook up with some guys during parties. But this didn’t stop Emily from being as serious and invested as y/n when it came to studies. Both were rather intellectual; indeed their favourite places ever had always been libraries, places full of books at least. Besides, they had met each other for the very first time in a library. « Checkmate, Em, she declared a few minutes later. – What? How’s that? No? Already? » She looked for another move to do, but she found nothing. « Checkmate, y/n repeated with a smile and amusedly this time. » Emily murmured something which looked like a « Too bad », and asked to take a revenge on her, but she lost one more time. « You should tell me how you can do that. You just checkmated in six moves. – Girl, you know I’ve been playing chess for ages. I’ll teach you one day. » Em smiled, while y/n was putting away the chess set in a storage drawer. Then she retraced her steps and went back to her bestie. « I think I’m going to– – Library? » y/n sighed loudly, rolling her eyes out of despair. « Not at all, let me finish my sentence. I’m going to buy blank sheets and I’ll try to find some cool postcards for my family. You’re coming? » But the other didn’t answer; she was smiling widely. It was a mocking and mischievous smile. « What? Why are you smiling like that? Did I say something funny? » Emily continued to smile in the same way as before. « Nothing special. I was wondering… – Hm? » She finally burst out laughing, making y/n, who was preparing her stuff to go outside, frowned. « You know, the neighbor… Shawn… He’s rather cute, uh? Do you think he’s currently single? » y/n let her billfold down, with the element of surprise. « What? I don’t know, Em, I don’t care about that, it is not our business– – Hm hm, you still love bets and challenges? – That doesn’t change actually, said y/n. » Even though she was rather a good loser usually, she was afraid of what her friend could say about Shawn. Emily was the kind of person who could challenged the others to do everything and anything. But it was always harebrained ideas. « What if one of us tried to get off with him for Canada Day? It could be funny. » y/n shook her head straight away, which meant no. « Certainly not, I decline this. But you can. That’s your genre to do this, not really mine. I’m the one who wants serious things. » Emily shrugged her shoulders. « You’re not funny, y/n. But okay, I’ll try during his party in two days, she explained. That could be really fun. – Obviously. One more on your list of conquests, her flatmate replied in a sigh, taking her bag. » They looked each other in the eyes; Emily’s one were full of challenge. « You’re crazy, Em, the other added. He might have a girlfriend who’s just next door and we don’t even know about it. You’ll see blurry when we’ll arrive and when he’ll say something like “and this is blablabla, my girlfriend”. » Her best friend shrugged her shoulders again, and then y/n asked her again if she wanted to go outside with her. Em declined, wanted to study a little. So with that, her friend went to the door, unlocked it, opened it and shut it again behind her. She was now in the corridor. She walked right up to the grey metal elevator, pressed the button to call it and then turned her gaze on the floor in an automatic way. The elevator arrived at her floor few seconds after, and its doors opened. When she raised her head again, she found someone who was familiar to her inside the lift, in front of her. « Hey, y/n! You’re going for a walk? – Hello again, Shawn, she replied while they inverted their positions, and she pressed the button that allowed to keep the elevator doors open. Yeah, last-minute shopping. » They talked for about five good minutes, about everything and nothing, whereas they had already talked together earlier. He asked about Em, what she was doing at the moment, what they haven’t discovered in Toronto yet. Also he questioned if both of them were still in for Canada Day. « Of course, she confirmed. We both are. That will be great. Thank you. » Shawn smiled at her, his hand pressing against the wall. His hands. y/n noticed how large they were. « Okay, I’m gonna let you go so, he finally declared. » After saying goodbye to each other, the elevator led y/n to the first floor and she left the building.

Many hours later, it was about a quarter past five, y/n just returned to the condo. She had spent a lot of time at a library in the centre, after buying what she had to buy. She had got lost in books and hadn’t pay attention to the time. She crossed the doorstep, and entered the apartment. « Hey, y/n, finally! Where were you? » Emily was sitting on the sofa, reading a whodunnit. « I did what I had to do, and as you can guess, I went to a library! It was very huge. You should have come, you missed something dude! – Ah? You’ll show me next time so. » After putting down her bag and stuff, y/n sat next to Em on the couch. The latter put her book on the living-room table, and the newcomer told her everything in details about what she saw in town, how the library and stores were… And eventually she told her that she passed Shawn as she went to the lift. Emily didn’t really comment about it. « You should have come with me outside if you wanted to pass him. If you want to catch his eye… – Yeah, patience… » y/n smiled at Em, who gave it back to her.

The following day, y/n just woke up. It was already twenty past ten. It was unusual for her to wake up at this time, because she was rather an early bird. For once, it was Em who was awake first, because when she came to the kitchen, she had already breakfast. « Hey y/n, her friend called her, what’s up? This is the first time you’re the second one to wake up. – Nothing much, I don’t know. There’s a first time for everything in life. » Actually, she didn’t sleep well. And Emily knew why. « You’re still thinking about Chris? she ventured. » y/n flinched and winced when she heard this name. « Yeah, maybe. I don’t want to talk about this. About him. » This guy, Christopher, was y/n’s ex with whom she had been for almost two years. She was really in love with him, and she thought it was mutual. But the day which had marked their breakup was the one when she had found out that he was cheating on her with a girl she had always hated, and that for several weeks. And the worst was that both were still dating, while it had been already nine months since the split-up. « Don’t even think about him and his slut anymore, Emily recommended to her while pouring her cereals into her milk again. They’re not worth you giving them attention. » y/n approved with a simple « hum », while eating some French toasts and drinking her milk. She was just trying to hold back her tears. « I know this ain’t easy, Em carried on, but you have to try. They’re toxic. You mustn’t think about these assholes. – I know, Em, her bestie retorted. And you’re totally right. »

Two hours later, Emily had gone into town in her turn, but y/n didn’t want to go outside for the day, feeling a little tired this morning. Em should be back very soon. y/n was watching TV, when someone knocked at the door. Surely Em, she thought. She didn’t hurry over answering the door, dragging her feet. She opened the door eventually. It wasn’t Em. It was Shawn. Again. « Heya, Shawn, how may I help you? – Hey, y/n. Is Emily there? – No, she’s in town. You can wait inside if you have to see and talk to her. » He frowned, which surprised the young girl. « What? she asked. » He grinned weakly. « Actually I wanted to see you. » So she pressed her hand on her clavicule. It was always the sign that she was nervous; nobody knew, except herself and Emily, obviously. « Oh. I’m listening. You want to? she suggested him, inviting him to enter. – No, it won’t be very long. » Shawn was staring at his feet, and finally he raised his head, looking his neighbor in the eyes. « I wanted to ask you something, actually. y/n… » The latter flinched for the second time in a morning. What did he have in mind? Did she do something? Did she say something? Thousands thoughts crossed her mind in one millisecond. She was looking at him. She got lost in his eyes. He was so neutral, and usually she could perceive what people thought and how their emotions were reflected through their eyes. But this time, she couldn’t perceive anything about him. Because his eyes weren’t talking.

A/N: So here was Part. I. I’ll try to post a Part. II very soon whether you want it or not lmao, idk when exactly, given that I haven’t written the end yet lmao I don’t even know how to end the story so rip me but I’ll find, don’t worry lol. As usual, any feedback is appreciated and welcome, it’s always a pleasure to know your opinion, etc.