#shot them down in a minute
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people are recording actual planes with the red light on the left wing and green light on the right wing: omg iranian ET is coming
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#pleaaaaaaaaase 😭😭😭😭😭😭#and even if it's actual drones do you think spy drones would be made with the usual lights. like do you think they ask the faa if their ver#secret foreign drone complies with the standards#hello dear faa is it ok if i fly my very secret drone above lots of people that will record it and post it online but it has the mandatory#lights so it's cool ? right ?#more seriously apparently this happened in the vincinity of military bases. had it been anything non us army related they would have#shot them down in a minute
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this cliff took more lives than i could on my own im losing it
#marvel rivals#snap shots#yeah sure why not. ill put rivals clips under snap shots too ig#real life snap gameplay footage woah. motion sickness warning ajeRLKAJ#'snap are you prone to bunny hopping like a jackass' yes i am just as i am to constant unnecessary reloading this will not change#i dont imagine ill post a lot of rivals clips vjaLRGJALKJ this one just made me chortle ......#squirrelgirl i can get i nudged her off but punisher my guy ... i know its only a week into launch but be careful ...#now i get to talk bout the bizarre sess kayla and i had Of Which This Clip Was Extracted From#ok there actually isnt a lot of bizarre things to mention. just wanted to say we had The Most Clutch last game of the night#like truuully we thought we'd lose but lol ... lmao ... also bonus mvp for me but whatever. ... .#she and i also Unreasonably lost it at the fact i sniped an ironman down three seconds into a match. it WAS p funny tho ...#offhandedly i was just 'can tony piss off a minute' and then. look at that. many such cases but lol ...#i wish i could say it was due to sleep-induced delirium but i fear even now im not tired so i think we're just stupid vEJLRVKJEA#we won like 90% of our games tho so ...... two dumbasses can make it work apparently#atp i might just ask her if i can record our sessions cause i end up live blogging them anyway#its not as if we didnt used to record gameplay shit together and she Sometimes streams so ejrLEJARLKJ shrug#it could be funny but thats also A Lot so prob wont do it. cause thatd mean id have to listen to my voice and thats a no !!!!#anyway im sleeping. if even one person finds this mildly amusing for any reason then i win#for now ima answer some asks i see i got then ima nap see ya in a biiitt
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There was gonna be more but, well, y'know 😒
So last night I got struck by the idea lightning and started spontaneously working on a Mafiafell self insert au because I'm insane. Underfell is already basically my favorite au, and while Mafiafell has it's problems (glances surreptitiously at that one infamous fic and comic) I think it has a lot of potential
#art#digital art#my art#mafiafell#mafiafell sans#sans#undertale au#mafiafell au#self ship#mafiafell self ship#the idea is They meet because he gets “cornered” by some rival family grunts being a little too confident for their own good#but before he can do anything#all of them get shot in the legs and go down within a minute#And Angel just casually pops in through the entrance to the alley with hands in pockets#dressed extremely convincingly like a dude#cuz it's the 1920s and she's both female and brown and human in a predominantly monster city#Something something “I don't care about this#I just don't like seeing people fighting dirty.“#He just thinks she's a particularly spunky 20 something dude#But he likes her moxie. He tries to give her some cash like a reward and she waves him off like “I don't need handouts. Keep your money.”#Gets a glimpse of purple eyes from under her hat and gets even more interested cuz what's a human *mage* doing wandering around those parts?#anyways thats all i got
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fnsdkfnsjkdfaskdjfaskjdl taash' level 1 bond description (the 'associate'/'contract killer'/'fellow necromancer' sort of blurb under their level on the companion screen) is just 'Here'. taash. you have to understand. I know you don't give a fuck, but to me, you are perfect
#they're literally just here#god forbid enbys do anything: the character. I have known them personally for five minutes and I would lay down my life for them#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#taash#this got such a good laugh out of me I've been having a real slow cumbersome morning of it but this brought me back to life#I brought harding with me on this one (as a treat! meet your future spouse and also congrats on them jesus christ)#and i imagine rye running around like '...y'know. I miss lucanis. when he isn't here.' and harding is patiently like 'yeah we know'#and then the note you pick up about the grey warden upset to be parted from their... buddy? unless... at the reassignment#PEAK accidental environmental storytelling going on here. rye automatically assuming they'd go in quietly and stealthily for an ambush#and taash just jumping out. you have been working too much with someone on the same wavelength as you babyboy you forget these things#I'm creating emergent narratives you wouldn't believe out here#the contrast of how rye's whole little goth deal looks in cutscenes in the necropolis vs. under the bright rivaini sun tho fhdskjfsa#out of their element but game to give it a shot. I'm good with sand the necropolis has a lot of sand
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you ever read a tumblr post thats so caught up on the most tiny, minute inaccuracies in a story and just know op never watched soap operas growing up
#'this didnt make sense' 'this plot was stupid' 'why wasnt x blah blah' bc this is a dumb show you watch for fun and not for intense accuracy#if you watched a wedding get blown up by a stalker cop and then the victims get airlifted in a helicopter and then it crashes and they have#to survive in the bush and the only way they are found and saved is by a girl getting bitten by a deadly spider and her mum who adopted her#out as a teen psychically feels the spider bite and somehow tracks them down in the bush- you wont care too much#that you could see the boom guy in the reflection of a shot for a minute yk
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a peaceful morning together
(also here's a song that I think fits for the two of them)
#this would obviously be further down the timeline in their relationship where they're working through their issues together#both of them might be terrible and no one can stand being more than 5 minutes around them#but they understand each other and that's what matters lol#hugo vasquez#s/i: noa simmons#otp: golden shot#borderlands#borderlands oc#tftbl#tales from the borderlands#self insert#self ship#my art
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Adding on to the “What if Papa V is Copia’s twin and they’re evil” idea: He’s the opposite of Copia not only in terms of meanness and how happy he is to relish in being an asshole, but he’s actually the opposite to Copia in terms of how he views his half-brothers. Like, he’s legit sad he never got to know them and wants to do the first three proud because he thinks they’re emblematic of everything Satanism should be.
Probably doesn’t really gaf about Cope tho. Not in a good way.
#Copia out here making pot shots at them and couldn’t care less#V out here coming down from the high of performing Mummy Dust#and then turning the next five minutes into a therapy sesh#the band ghost#ghost bc#papa emeritus v#papa emeritus iv
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grabbing rainbow sherbet vodka for the stream because I know it's what ichi would want 🤞
bro grabbing that fucking super mario vodka what the shit 😭
#snap chats#i dont know what im gonna get...... i SHOULD get soju since i can get more for cheaper#and soju's more potent now innit... but i am a sake fan... sake my best friend..#but i like my sake hot. unless its nigori then OF COURSE you have to have it chilled....#gddammit i left my shot glass at my moms. i didnt think id need it </3#maybe sake's the game then.....#just to make sure i dont ACTUALY black out NO DID I TELL THE TIME I BLAKCED OUT FOR THE FIRST AND ONLY TIME#ILL TELL IT AGAIN SINCE ITS TOPICAL IT WAS THE NIGHT OF MY SISTER'S WEDDING#and i went out post-wedding drinking with my dad and my sis and her hubby yeah#and /im/ a master of acting like im fine when im not when i care to and since i never want to look A Fool in front of my father again#i acted fine after i reached the point where I Very Much Was Not Fine#LIKE THERE WERE DRINKS AT THE WEDDING OOFC BUT I ALSO GOT SOME WHISKEY AT A BAR WE WENT TO#AND SO EVENTUALLY MY DAD AND HIS WIFE AND I ALL GO BACK TO THE HOTEL WE'RE ALL STAYING AT#god theyre so embarrassing i was walking (read: wobbling) back to the room i shared with my bro#and theyre just :) 👋 Good Niiiight We're Gonna Watch You Go Until You're Safe :) 👋 <- im literally down the hall from them#and the fucking. SECOND i get into my room im just hhoUUGGHGHHH BROTHER OF MINE. WHAT IS HAPPENING#i dont remember what happened i know i started watching Why Dont You Play In Hell again and then i suddenly woke up in my bed#I WAS ON THE COUCH LIKE I CANNOT STRESS THE ABRUPTNESS OF ME WAKING UP IN BED#I SAT ON THE COUCH TO WATCH THE MOVIE I THINK I GOT 27 MINUTES IN AND I BLINKED AND I INSTATRANSMISSIONED#hilarious. anyway i refuse to let that happen ever again AFLKEFJKAJ#so sake's the call. i think. idk we'll see what my wallet thinks cause the sake is a lil pricier than the soju..#it a special occasion live a little. is what ill tell myself ☠️
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Another mainstream Fallout game without mulchable human enemies. Instead, there is a tight intercommunity on a much smaller map, where the player begins in long stretches of isolation. The first NPCs the player see is through the scope of their trusty rifle, with names like Bandit and Raider. It's a Fallout game.
Do you take the shot?
#it's just that like on a meta level the newer games kind of condition you to kill whatever you come across#with no special emphasis on any kind of life. and it definitely rewards you for doing this#raiders without names. it's become mindless fodder for the player#and that's all good and well. it's a video game and the player isn't mindless at all and neither is the combat#personally i don't want to kill people and see them explode. but i understand this is part of some huge appeal#what i want is just like. a little nuance to these things. named enemies and less radiant quests and fewer things to do with more impact#it's just interesting because by the game's own rules these NPCs above should be shot on sight (this is mostly about Fallout 4)#and I'd like a game where no life should be taken automatically. where everyone has something to say or something to lose. a story that is-#being told whether we the player are in on it or regardless of if we ever even know (or if we care to pay attention)#the distinct horror where you've killed someone without considering their life. i don't want to trick the player. these NPCs won't be-#dressed in raider gear. it's just an interesting option that comes up. it's been 20 minutes. these are the first people you see.#what do you do?#and now using mutants or ghouls as a backup enemy option is just for fools. they should be treated with the same respect. you know?#it's just that this is a game about post apocalyptica. haven't we lost enough?#when do we stop burning down our world and start fixing it?#maybe it doesn't have to be mainstream. maybe it's the equivalent of a Working f4 settlement builder and we can romp around saving people.#hunting things.#the franchise business#fallout
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It just occurred that for all im interested in Dragon Age Darthvader, I should maybe like. Actually. Finish inquisition,,
#and probably replay origions and 2 come to think of it#its weird how little i play these games given how into them i am#theres just....a lot of filler yknow?#all of them suffer from terminal Walk Down Big Tunnel Kill Things Them 20 Minute Talking Time syndrome#which is a bioware issue generally tbh#but yeah ive beat Origions. three times i think? city elf dalish and noble dwarf#ive played 2 once and honestly really want to give it a second shot bc i love Sass Hawke's overall vibe#but inquisition yeah i. furthest i got was the fear demon i think?? i cant even remember super clearly#i always get bogged down in the side questing which. on one hand way more fun than previous games to me#but very much a time sink#and then my attention drifts to other things and i drop it#and then suddenly ive played ficking orlais like 10 times#ANYWAY#now that i have easier access to it i might restart it. give it a genuine push this time
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Gettin' Through the Holidays Mental Health Tricks
If y'all are anything like me, this time of year is triggering AF. Here are some small, very easy grounding exercises that I was taught by my therapist, basically in order of how much I like them for this rage-inducing season. You make like them in a different order, depending on your rage-to-despair ratio.
Push a wall: literally go up to a wall and try to push it over. Really try. I promise you won't push it over, but give it your best shot. Try to hold it as long as you can, and then take a breather and assess whether you need to repeat. Why it works: This is a quick, physical expulsion of the fight-or-flight feeling. It's a bit like punching a wall, but without the potential to hurt yourself/look scary/damage things. You can even do it in front of people and say you're stretching, they'll never know (unless the wall actually falls down, but this will not happen, I assure you).
Shake like a dog: Animals shake to release stress, and you are also an animal. Setting aside time to just shake it out, as vigorously as you can, arms and legs, face, stick your tongue out, pretend you're shaking like a wet dog. You can dance instead, if that feels better, and you can do this to music, but basically the more unhinged you can be, the better. If you are in a place you can scream, scream too! Why it works: like the above, this is a release of pent-up stress and anxiety. Especially if your rage-to-woe ratio is high, some kind of physical exertion is often the best way to burn through the cortisol and adrenaline you're building up.
Bilateral Tapping: Cross your arms over your chest so that your fingertips are at your shoulders, and slowly tap, one hand at a time, back and forth, for about a minute. Breathe slowly. Why it works: This is weird as hell, but because this engages both sides of your brain, it helps override the activity of the amygdala, which is the part of your brain that Makes The Fear. If you're being literally triggered in a situation, i.e. you're having a trauma response, or reliving some family trauma, this is a good one.
Box Breathing: From a comfortable position (can really be seated, laying down or standing), inhale slowly for a count of 4, hold for a count of 4, exhale for a count of 4, hold for a count of 4, then repeat. You can do it for shorter counts or longer counts, but if you vary the counts make sure the exhale is longer than the inhale. You can close your eyes or leave them open. Why it works: This exercise helps you move from a sympathetic (activated) nervous system response to a parasympathetic (balanced) response. I do this one every day, and it's a good gateway to meditation. Especially helpful in anxious or tense situations, but I find if I'm very triggered I need one of the other ones first, or it can make anxiety worse. Breathwork is amazing but not usually as a first exercise if you're very activated, or have been activated a long time.
Ice: Lots of ways to do this one – hands in cold water for 30 seconds, ice pack on the back of your neck, dip your entire face into a bowl of ice water (this one's the most effective). Why it works: I kinda think this is hilarious, but this activates your mammalian dive reflex. It immediately slows your heart-rate, so if you are feeling your blood pressure and heart rate rising, this one is very good. The only reason this one's at the bottom of my list is because I hate being cold.
I wish you all a very get-through-the-holidays-without-hurting-yourself. Take time alone if you need it.
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#the way i got wet from kissing them for not even ten minutes#🥴#down absolutely horrendously bad#hearing them both moan again was truly all i needed#i wish i could’ve stayed longer#i need to be shot#T&H
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pornstar!toji who is known for being easy with his scenes. he's there for a good fuck and an even better paycheck: it doesn't matter who, or where, or how... if he's being paid he will do it. he doesn't mind getting nasty, and so he's often booked for more exotic scenes. he fucks good, and he fucks a lot.
pornstar!toji who is strapped for cash one week after an unfortunate loss on the horses, and takes the first scene offered to him. a vanilla fuck with a new-to-the-scene pornstar with potential... at least that's what his agent, shiu, tells him. he's confused on what potential he's hinting at until he rocks up ten minutes late to the shoot and lays eyes on you, already naked and on the stage bed. you have a look to you that makes a man like toji feel obliged to drop to his knees.
pornstar!toji who is already harder than he has been in a long time when shiu clarifies that when he called you 'new to the scene' he meant it: this is your first porn shoot. and though you're not a virgin, toji has the honour of taking your first time on camera... and god does he love the thought.
pornstar!toji who is greeted with a small smile and a soft 'hello' from you, shy beneath his gaze as if you aren't naked and soon to be stuffed full of his cock. he watches your eyes shift, from his piercing eyes to his beautifully scarred lip to the gorgeous tone of his body, all the way down to his awfully large cock. he can tell you're nervous, worried about taking all of him on film.
pornstar!toji who isnt good with gentle comforts, but still wants you to feel at ease with him. so, despite his instructions for a simple fuck scene, toji attacks you with deep kisses first, gets you used to the burning heat of his body against yours. and when you're melted enough against his skin he trails down and eats you out for a long twenty minutes. production would try and stop him, but he's already tipsy on your taste and the moans leaving your lips are, frankly, made for porn.
pornstar!toji who revels in the way your back arches off the mattress—he'd accuse you of putting on a show for the cameras if your hips weren't bucking up against his face in an almost primal need. he can taste it on you, the genuine lust, the way you drip wet on his tongue and still grab at his hair for more. and when he gives you more—when he finally slips his cock into you—he can't help himself from groaning out something needy. he's the silent type, letting his costar take center stage, but god can he not keep quiet feeling your walls wrapped around him.
pornstar!toji who has never had an issue with porn before, but with your legs wrapped around his waist, your eyes locked onto his as he pumps in and out of you with white hot need, he finds he hates the thought of anyone else seeing you like this. he's not a possessive man, he shouldn't feel this way, but he does. even the watchful stares of the cameramen piss him off, and he finds his hips moving faster and his cock nestling deeper inside of you just to show them that he's the one pleasing you.
pornstar!toji who can't help but kiss you as you both cum in unison. he ruins the shot, the cameras cant see your orgasm face when he's swallowing your moans like they're sweet wine. he's surprised his pay doesn't get cut for it.
when pornstar!toji does get paid, it's the first cheque in a very long time that he doesn't blow the same night it comes through. because he doesn't have time to go out and waste his money: he's at home fucking his fist to the film you made together and mentally degrading himself for being so pussy whipped. he strokes himself in time with his own thrusts in the video, and tries so desperately to recall your taste on his tongue, but its fruitless. he's agitated and sexually frustrated and keeps reloading your personal pages to see if you've filmed with anyone since him.
pornstar!toji who becomes so lost in his own mind that he starts turning down shoots with other actors—shoots with good pay. he's done everything under the sun, done all the hardcore porn and weird fetish content but now that he's gotten a fresh taste of plain passion sex with you, he can't stomach anything else. he'd say your name, he knows it—and it doesn't help that he hasn't been able to reach orgasm for a week without thinking of you.
pornstar!toji who, after three weeks of pure misery, decides to make a move. he doesn't do dates or romantic nights on the town. he doesn't do flowers or sweet nothings or eye contact even, but he finds himself contacting shiu and threatening the poor man in hopes of your real name, your address, anything.
and you, late one evening fucking yourself on your fingers to the brink of frustrated tears because they're not his cock. even more disgruntled when theres a pounding knock at your front door, and after cleaning yourself up a little you swing it open to find pornstar!toji stood in the rain outside. and you can only take him in—his heavy build and desperate eyes—before he's crashing his lips against yours, walking you into your own home and kicking the door shut behind him.
#toji smut#toji fushiguro smut#toji zenin smut#toji x reader#toji fushiguro x reader#toji zenin x reader#toji x you#toji fushiguro x you#jujutsu kaisen smut#jjk smut#jjk x you#jjk toji
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oh fuck lovebomb started playing and it set off my fight or flight instincts
#my post#i hear that opening Wom Wom Wom Wom and sit up straight in a cold sweat#i still hear it in my dreams sometimes#i captain chip do solemnly swear to fuck shit up to help those in need and to be the best goddamn pirates anyone has ever seen we need to#get these pirates inside now did we ever get a name for what theyre called the riptide pirates BAAANANANANANANANNANANANANAA hey guys check#this out YES whos laughing now fuckers fuck you ok if anyone can clear the gauntlet its the riptide pirates get to the center of the prison#thats your out we need to hget him out of here is he even still alive its worth a shot BLOW YOU AWAY gillion youre not actually the chosen#one chip i think youre irresponsible and incompetent and honestly youre a danger to everyone around you chip arlins probably dead and you#need to move on and live for yourself and your own destiny jay i think youre ugly and no one will ever love you gillion i think this place#is playing more than one trick on us its not us chip its this place stay back dont make me do this do what you have to hey there little nei#wait a fucking minute wait drey who put you in here it wasnt one of hey brother you have a lot of explaining to do but come and maybe ill#let them go and what if i dont come with you youd rather be a pirate then i will show you what youre up against you wanna take on a pirate#im right here stop please just stop if i come with you will you let them leave we swore an oath chip its gonna be okay discipline them jay#you wanna know my secret so bad chip i convinced the navy to let me go undercover i was just using you i dont care what you were before thi#youre a riptide pirate now what do you really want jay and just say it so i can fight for it i wanna keep adventuring with you guys gill#thats all i want right now jay because you are my duaghter i will give yoy a headstart but when i catch you you will no longer be a daughte#to me just another piratee BAAAHHH gill youre not going down that easy buddy were not leaving you behindAUAGDSHGH jay my anme is jay ferin#co captain of the riptide pirates im gonna trust my friends were gonna fuck shit up im gonna be the best goddamn pirate youve ever seen#i dont doubt it sureshot
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John Prices wife coming to pick him up at the airport after he returns from a mission, but the car is now full of military men.
One look at the three boys, completely exhausted and pulling their phones out to book a taxi had your heart crying. Without thinking, you offered them all a lift to yours and Johns home for them to stay overnight.
So now there’s three men cramped onto your three backseats, John having the luxury of sitting in the front. Simon is on the end (still in his balaclava but luckily not the skull mask because you’d be a little creeped out seeing that every time in the rear view mirror), Johnny in the middle and then Kyle on the other end. Johnny complains for about 10 minutes that he’s squished in and has no room to move but after that he’s completely zonked out on Simons shoulder.
Your music plays quietly through the speakers and they’re happy to listen to anything that isn’t gun shots or explosions.
Once you arrive home, they all climb out the car, grabbing their bags from the boot and dumping them down in the living room.
“Place looks less lifeless than last time I was here,” comments Johnny.
“Finally got a woman’s touch to it,” adds Kyle.
You smile a little at the non-direct compliment. Price also looks around, noticing the little details that have changed or the things that have been added around his house, keeping a hand on your back. He leans down and kisses you gently, mumbling “I missed you” against your lips.
“I missed you too. But it looks like you’ve lost weight.” You glance down at his body. “I’ll fatten you up again,” you tease with a little giggle as he chuckles.
It’s around 9pm by the time you’ve cooked dinner for four people who have appetites of bears. They all look at you as if you’re an angel sent from heaven when they see the food, sitting down at the dining table silently and scoffing down the meal.
By 10pm, you go into the living room thinking they’re all watching TV but instead they’re all asleep. You grab some spare blankets from beside the sofa and cover them up except for John. You shake him awake and make him move upstairs into bed with you. There’s no way you’re letting him sleep on the sofa and not with you after weeks apart.
#call of duty#john price#captain price#cod modern warfare#cod x reader#price x you#price x reader#john x reader#simon ghost riley#kyle gaz garrick#johnny soap mactavish#simon cod#johnny cod#price cod#task force 141#task force x reader
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I discovered the ability to play on "hardcore" mode in Minecraft, which is where the difficulty is set to hard and if you die, that's it. Which is weirdly enticing, so I gave it a shot.
The first time I tried it, I pretty immediately died. Like, I did not last an entire hour.
But, I recently had a world where I survived over 100 days, and almost all of those day were spent in a Dark Oak Forest biome, which is one of the more dangerous ones. I built a 3-story house with a greenhouse, a wine cellar, a mine shaft, agriculture and livestock farming and more. I was slowly exploring the verdant cave below my home. I stepped backward into lava and couldn't get out again, while I was on the phone with a friend. Don't chat and play, I suppose lol
I restarted on a random seed, and there were several nice biomes within view (jungle, flower, desert, badlands, birch forest). I could see a village in the distance, so I headed that way first and found a massive abandoned mine just outside of town. I didn't go too far in, but there were some chests of goodies near some of the entrances. I tamed a few wolves and a cat, and I just took off into the distance. I spent the first 20+ days just kind of wandering the wilderness with my dogs, camping out at night. I picked a random nice spot in a broad Birch Forest to toss down my stuff and build a home, mostly because my hands were full.
I'm close to 50 "days" in, and I've spent most of it out gallivanting. I went out to find a village to tame a second cat, so I could have more at-will, and to find a Striped Wolf out in those badlands (successful). I spent days looking for a Spotted Dog in the savannas that looked like plateaus (unsuccessful, and I lost my cat and had to go BACK and get ANOTHER one). I finally returned home and this is the view from my front windows, just before I logged for the evening.
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Something about only having one life makes the game a little more charming than usual. I mean, it's always charming, but I've been taking more time to look around at the worlds I won't be returning to when I finally bite it. Making sure I take a minute to appreciate the views, pat the doggos, look in the nooks and crannies for things I might like, since I won't get to come back. I mean, I can come back but I can't Come Back, y'know?
The same is true of real life, obviously. There are an increasing number of things that want us dead, but there are still sunsets out the window, and doggos to be pat, and little treasures to be found if we're looking for them. I think that's worth sticking around as long as I can.
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