#shizaya whumptober

[lavenderboneswrites]

Heart Over Ice

Durarara, Shizaya, AO3

***Please read the tags*** ***Trigger Warning***

Summary: Shizuo witnesses an incredible act of violence against his most hated enemy. Left to pick up the pieces, he finds himself experiencing unwanted side-effects, all while forced to deal with the very person he claims to hate.

Tags: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Attempted Murder, Sexual Assault, Attempted Sexual Assault, Non-Consensual Drug Use, drug induced paralysis, Medical Procedures, Trauma, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Discussion of Rape, Discussion of sexual assault, Discussion of Death, discussion of trauma, Triggers, discussion of triggers, Panic Attacks, explicit descriptions of panic attacks, Canon-Typical Violence, aka Shizuo typical violence, Protective Heiwajima Shizuo, Shizuo-centric, Binge Drinking, Angst with a Happy Ending, Minor Kishitani Shinra/Celty Sturluson, minor original characters, Minor Character Death, Eventual Smut, eventual consensual smut, Eventual Romance, Eventual Happy Ending, Pre-Relationship, First Aid, Mentions of Yakuza, Drug Dealing, Drugs, Thoughts of Self-harm, Self-Harm, Torture, Disassociation

Chapter 1 - Over Ice

When Shizuo decided to head to Shinjuku to beat up flea the last thing he expected to see when he kicked down the door was Izaya’s lifeless eyes staring back at him.

It had been surprisingly quiet the past couple of months, so much so that Shizuo had started to become suspicious. Like any rational person, Shizuo could only come the conclusion that his arch nemesis was up to no good. Which in turn had brought him here.

Shizuo stood frozen in the threshold.

Izaya was spread out on that ridiculously expensive sectional couch of his, head and feet only visible as another body covered his. Cold fear gripped Shizuo as he recognized the sound of grunting. The way the body atop of Izaya’s was rutting.

It was nauseating the way Izaya’s head moved with the motion, his body completely limp and weak against the force bearing down on it. Shizuo felt like he was experiencing second hand motion sickness just from watching but he couldn’t stop watching. Couldn’t tear his eyes away.

The man hadn’t even realised that he was no longer alone; his face pressed into Izaya’s neck, his hands down Izaya’s pants … too focused on chasing his own revolting pleasure.

“What the fuck are you doing!?”

Shizuo’s deafening bellow shook the entire apartment. The man leapt back from the flea like he had been electrocuted. Shizuo could barely breathe through the churning of his stomach, the feeling as if he had swallowed live snakes, to take in the fact that both Izaya and the man were still fully clothed.

No. All Shizuo could see was the fucking tent in this would-be rapist’s pants.

Shizuo shot forward with an inhuman roar. The man didn’t even have a chance to raise his arms and shield his head before Shizuo smashed in his face with a fist.

The man’s nose shattered, fragmenting and flattening as the momentum sent him flying. With the same force that had sent others into the sky, the man crashed against the bookshelves lining the wall behind him with a sickening crunch. His body seemed to suspend upright for a moment, pinned by the force of Shizuo’s fury, before it slid down and lay crumpled on the ground.

Killkillkillfuckkillwhatkillthefuck.

Shizuo’s rage was floundering among a sea of cold dread.

Fear gripped his heart. Pierced it.

He was by Izaya’s side in an instant, kneeling beside those stupid fucking plush couch cushions.

“Flea…”

Shaking fingers turned Izaya’s face towards him. Shizuo had always thought the louse was pale, but his skin was shock white now and he fully expected it to be cold to the touch. Shizuo was shocked to feel the warmth of life under his hands. A direct contradiction to the flea’s empty stare.

He looks dead.

Shizuo’s mind was splitting apart. It couldn’t catch up with what his body was seeing, not able to deal with the fear that was clawing up his throat and making him tremble. He struggled to gain control over the panic, he had to push it aside, had to do something.

Shizuo pulled out his phone, quickly calling one of his limited number of contacts.

Those few seconds waiting as his phone rang out were agony.

“Hello Shizuo-kun~!” Shinra’s bright voice chirped down the line. “To what do I owe-,”

“-The flea’s hurt.”

Shizuo doesn’t know if it was his words that cut Shinra off or the way his voice shook. There was silence for a second, and then, “where are you?”

‘What did you do’ was left unsaid, Shinra’s tone shifting from peppy to professional.

“Are you in danger?”

“No, but Shinra he’s not moving,” Shizuo’s panic manifested physically, he gripped the flea’s shoulder and shook him, as if it could somehow magically snap him out of the strange trance-like state he was in.

“Shizuo,” Shinra’s voice was low and serious, a far cry from his usual lilt. Shizuo held onto it like a lifeline. “I need you take a long, deep breath for me.”

“I-I can’t.”

“Yes you can, I’m going to talk you through it.”

Shizuo couldn’t feel his own body, couldn’t feel his chest, and if he couldn’t feel his chest then how was he supposed to make his lungs do something as simple and instinctual as breathing.

“One, two, three … a big breath in- yeah they’re you go,” Shizuo’s body followed Shinra’s words like gospel. It seemed it had gotten fed up with the absolute mess of Shizuo’s panicked mind and was going to seek the voice of common sense coming from his phone instead. “Hold it … that’s it, okay now let it go.”

Letting go and exhaling that one breathe was like flickering lights in Shizuo’s head finally stabilising. He repeated the process again: inhale, hold, exhale.

“Where are you?”

“Shinjuku.”

“At Izaya’s?”

Shizuo nodded, then realised Shinra couldn’t see it over the phone, “yeah.”

“I’m on my way,” Shizuo could hear the sound of Shinra moving around. “Stay on the line Shizuo.”

“…Yeah,” Shizuo seemed incapable of more than one-word answers. He didn’t think he could handle anything more complicated than Shinra’s short, direct questions either. It must be intentional on the doctor’s part.

“I need you tell me if Izaya has a pulse.”

Shizuo felt a strangled sound get caught in his throat. Fuck, a pulse, right. Why was it that all common sense had been pushed from his head?

Inhale.

Shizuo struggled to muster enough willpower to physically force his hand from Izaya’s shoulder, the muscles clenched painfully tight. Trying, and failing, to ignore brown eyes staring up at him lifelessly. Shizuo moved his hand to the flea’s neck, pushing two fingers in against his pulse point.

Hold.

For one terrifying second, one second that seemed to last a lifetime, Shizuo felt nothing. And then…

Exhale.

Shizuo felt dizzy at the comforting thump-thump under his fingers. “Fuck,” a breathless laugh escaped him, “yes … yes he’s got a pulse.”

He didn’t have the mental capacity to analyse what exactly this all meant for him, all Shizuo could focus on was the absolute relief that flooded his veins. He felt jittery with it; like it was a drug injected directly into his bloodstream.

“Okay, good, that’s good … now I need you to check his breathing.”

Fuck.

Shizuo really should have known it was too early to celebrate. Emboldened by proof of life under his fingers, Shizuo quickly nodded to himself. He could do this. Just breathe.

“What do I do?”

Shizuo could hear the way Shinra’s voice evened out slightly, less sharp and stark, relief at Izaya’s survival and Shizuo’s gaining competence. “Look to see if his chest is rising and falling.”

Shizuo stared at the flea’s torso, afraid to blink in case he missed something. “It’s moving … I think?” It didn’t seem like very much to Shizuo, whose own chest had only moments ago been heaving. “Not very much though.”

“That’s okay,” Shinra’s soothed over the line, “now I want you to put your ear over his mouth and nose, you should be able to hear his breathing and feel it against your cheek.”

In any other situation, Shizuo would have visibly recoiled of just the thought of getting so close to the louse. Now however, he followed Shinra’s instructions to the letter, no sign of hesitation whatsoever.

“Can you feel it?”

“Yeah, but,” a small puff air, barely a caress against his cheek, “it’s so…”

“Short?”

“Yeah and,” Shizuo frowned, trying to think of the right words to describe the almost non-existent breath against his face. He had to lean in so close that he was almost touching Izaya’s face to even feel anything. “Shallow.”

“Okay,” it didn’t sound very okay to Shizuo. “Are you okay?”

No, Shizuo was not fucking okay, but that didn’t matter right now. “What should I do?”

“Monitor his breathing, if it stops you will need to preform CPR. Don’t worry, I’ll walk you through it.”

Trying to ignore the vision of crushing the flea’s torso under his palms if he even tried, Shizuo straightened up, eyes straining as they followed the feeble rise and fall of the flea’s chest.

“Can you tell me if he is hurt anywhere? Does he have any injuries?”

If not for his rumpled clothes or dead-eyed stare, Shizuo wouldn’t know anything was actually wrong with the flea. Shizuo couldn’t help but take in the way Izaya’s collar was stretched, as if someone had yanked it down to expose his skin. The plastic of his phone creaked under his hand as his gaze moved downwards; he couldn’t break his phone, he needed Shinra to keep talking to him or he would go insane.

Izaya’s pants were half undone and pulled low on his hips, belt split in two at the buckle. Shizuo snarled out loud at the dark stain on Izaya’s jeans at his upper thigh.

KillkillkillkillkillkillkillkillkillkillkillKILL.

“Shizuo are you still there? Are you okay?”

Why the fuck did Shinra keep asking if he was okay? He wasn’t, but it didn’t matter so shut the fuck up already.

“I-I …,” Shizuo was shaking with rage, desperate to not crush his phone, to not stand up and rip that piece of shit’s fucking head off. “I don’t think he’s injured.”

Not physically anyway.

“Okay. That’s good,” Shinra’s repetition was somehow comforting. He kept saying those words like a mantra. “You’re doing great Shizuo.”

“He isn’t moving Shinra, why isn’t he moving?” Shizuo spoke in a voice he didn’t even recognise. Weak and pathetic and shaking.

“It will be okay Shizuo, just breathe.”

“I don’t want to fucking breathe,” Shizuo growled down the phone, misplaced anger turning on the only available outlet. “I want to beat the fucking shit out of that son of a bitch.”

“Please do not do that,” Shinra no doubt thought Shizuo was talking about Izaya. “What happened? Did you two get into another fight?”

“What!?” Shizuo felt his body recoil at just the idea, “I would never-,”

“-Okay, okay,” Shinra cut over his ranting, “please just try and stay calm.”

“Where the fuck are you?”

“I’m almost there, just hang on.”

Shinra kept talking to him, kept asking how Izaya’s breathing was (no change), kept telling him to inhale, hold, exhale. Shizuo could only kneel by the flea’s side, small tremors going through his body as he struggled to follow Shinra’s instructions and just keep breathing.

At some point he had pulled up a blanket from the end of the couch and covered Izaya with it. Part of him was worried the flea might be cold, another just couldn’t stand looking at that dark stain on denim anymore. Shizuo thought maybe he should try and close Izaya’s pants, but his hands shook so much at just the thought of it that he quickly abandoned the idea.

Once he was covered Shizuo had nowhere left to look but his face. He could almost see his head bobbing with that earlier motion again.

Shizuo scrubbed a hand over his own face, clinging to the soothing words Shinra repeated by his ear. “It’s okay, you’re doing great. I’m almost there, you’re going to be alright.”

Shizuo was trapped in Izaya’s eyes. His pupils were blown wide, almost eclipsing all of the colour of his iris. It was funny, Shizuo had always described the flea’s brown eyes as red, like a demon’s. Looking now, at the thin sliver still visible, Shizuo thought they were almost an oaky whiskey colour.

Are you awake flea? Can you see me?  

Shinra had asked Shizuo if he was conscious, to which Shizuo had replied with a meek ‘I don’t know.’ Izaya’s eyes were open, and no matter what Shizuo thought, he wasn’t staring at anything in particular. Though Shizuo felt as if those eyes were freezing him all the same.

It really did look like he was dead.

Shizuo had proved otherwise, but every few minutes he would check his pulse and breathing again just to make sure.

“Shizuo.”

It took him a moment to realise that Shinra had spoken from the doorway and not the phone. Shizuo stood up, his legs feeling numb beneath him as he pocketed the device.

Shinra waltzed into the apartment, white doctor’s coat flicking behind him with an almost righteous purpose.

Shizuo watched the way Shinra took in everything with clinical analysis. Shizuo, Izaya, the man passed out behind them. The doctor’s brow furrowed, but he gave no further indication he was perturbed.

With a particularly large exhale, Shizuo took a step away from the couch. Shinra knelt down almost exactly where Shizuo had been keeping watch, black medical bag beside him as he opened it and pulled out a stethoscope.

“Izaya can you hear me? Can you speak?” Shizuo didn’t know why Shinra even bothered asking, the flea silent in response. It was amazing how Shinra could sound so calm, as if he was only talking to a patient during a general check-up and not the flea’s petrified body. It helped ground Shizuo, just a little. “If you can hear me I want you to try and blink, okay?”

Izaya’s eyelids didn’t even flutter.

A growl came unbidden to his lips as Shinra ripped the blanket off Izaya with a cold detachment that seemed almost too severe to Shizuo. If he noticed the flea’s state of undress he didn’t mention it.

“Oi,” Shizuo warned as Shinra lifted Izaya’s black top up, exposing the pale white skin of his torso.

“I need to listen to his breathing.”

Fucking hell, Shizuo knew that. So why did his mind rebel so fiercely at the thought of hands on that unmoving body?

“Tell me what happened.”

Shizuo wanted a fucking cigarette so badly, but the flea would probably pissed as hell if he smoked in his apartment though.

If he lives.

“I don’t fucking know,” Shizuo snapped, glaring at the white of the dry wall. He couldn’t look anywhere else without feeling like he would fracture. “I came here to beat the crap out of him and-,”

-Shizuo cut himself off, not sure exactly how to put what he witnessed into actual words.

“What’s wrong with him anyway?”

Shinra sighed as he shined the light of a mini torch into the flea’s eyes. “I can only theorise, but I think he’s been drugged.”

There was a ringing in his ears that felt like a gun had gone off next to his head, unbalancing him.

Drugged.

“Motherfucker!” Shizuo swung himself around to face the bookshelves, eyes landing on the crumpled form of-,“that fucking piece of shit!”

Shinra yelled out as he leapt over the couch, a thud coming from his feet as they impacted violently with the hardwood floors. “Shizuo!”

“I’m going to fucking kill him!” Shizuo would crush every bone in that prick’s body, would rip his arms off, then his legs, then his head, and then he would crush the pieces to dust.

“Stop it!” Shinra’s voice snapped across his haze, more forceful than he ever heard. “I need him to tell us what he drugged Izaya with or-,”

-Shinra stopped himself from finishing that sentence and Shizuo was extremely grateful for it.

His whole body was trembling. Hard. He wasn’t sure it had ever stopped. Looking down on the bastard that had done this, it took every ounce of willpower to hold himself back. Only Shinra’s words and the man’s unconscious and already bloody face stopped him.

“Izaya,” Shizuo wanted to clench his eyes shut at the soft way Shinra spoke behind him. “Izaya, it’s Shinra.”

Why are you even bothering? It’s not like he’s awake. He’s not awake. Please don’t be awake.

“It’s going to be okay, Izaya.”

Shizuo’s jaw almost creaked at how hard he clenched his teeth.

Breathe.

In what seemed like a blur to Shizuo, but was in reality a slow and steady pace, Shinra was at Shizuo’s side. Silver scalpel in hand.

“I need to talk to him.” Gone was any of the softness his voice held when he spoke to Izaya, all that remained in its wake was ice.

Even Shizuo had to admit he felt a little apprehensive at the dark look in the doctor’s eyes. “Can you wake him up without killing him?”

“Can’t you?” Shizuo shot back without thinking.

Shinra let out a laugh that was like stone scraping against concrete, “no … no I don’t think I can.”

Inhale.

Shizuo kicked out none to gently at the man’s legs.

Hold.

Another kick, “wake the fuck up.”

Exhale.

Shizuo and Shinra listened to the low groan that came from the man. Hands went to his broken face, fingers feeling out the swollen and the bruised. “Fuck.”

His voice was high and weedy, grating on Shizuo’s already frayed nerves. Plain muddy brown eyes looked up, widening in fear at the sight of Shizuo.

“W-what the f-fuck are you doing here?”

“Ah, I think we’ll be asking the questions, don’t you?” Shinra replied in a saccharine sweet voice frozen with malice. He raised the scalpel in his hand, the blade glinting in the light.

The man however thought Shizuo was the bigger threat. Wire thin arms struggled to push himself up and away from the blonde, but he only managed to slump his back against the bookshelf behind him.

“You broke my fucking nose!” The man hissed as his hands went to his face again. “What the fuck dude!”

Shizuo didn’t trust himself to speak, hands clenched at his side, fingernails digging into his palms.

I should break more than that, you fucking deadshit.

If Shizuo opened his mouth it would open the floodgates and he would not be able to stop. He would tear this scum apart.

“What did you drug our friend with?” Ignoring the man’s pitiful complaints, Shinra squatted down in front of him. “I need to know the exact drug you used.”

“What does it fucking matter, shit…”

“It matters because the muscles around his lungs are paralysed, which in turn is affecting his breathing.”

“Hah,” the vermin spat out in amusement. “What a damn shame.”

Before Shizuo could make a move, before he could even let out an earth shattering roar, Shinra stabbed his scalpel down into the man’s foot.

Shizuo jumped at the ruthless action, the man howling as he kicked out at Shinra with his other leg. The blade had gone clean through the leather of his shoe, through skin and bone and blood, until it had come out the bottom of his foot and pinned him to the floor. Shinra had struck like a viper, no indication he was going to move until he was driving down viciously.

“It seems you don’t quite realise the gravity of your situation,” Shinra ripped the scalpel out of the man’s foot with what Shizuo could only describe as professionalism. “You’re in the apartment of one of the most powerful men in the city, a man you have just attempted to assault, and not only is there him but the Fortissimo of Ikebukuro … and then there’s me.”

Shinra gave Glasgow grin, so wide it was more of a gash across his face than anything resembling joy. “I’m a nobody really … but there is someone I love, and they would want me to help my friends. I can’t disappoint the one I love, you know?”

“I’m going to kill you four eyes! I’m going to fuck your scrawny little ass to death.”

Killkillkillcrushkillcrushcrushkill.

“Oh?” Shinra sounded intensely amused by that, yet none of that humour reached his eyes. “But if you attack me, who is there to hold him back?” The man looked fearfully back up at Shizuo as Shinra motioned over his shoulder.

“So why don’t you tell me what drugs you used, ne?” Shinra tilted his head, like a puppy almost. It didn’t match the sadistic and quite frankly, terrifying, expression on his face.

“Why should I? He’s just going to kill me!” The man spat at Shizuo’s feet.

“Perhaps,” Shinra replied thoughtfully, “but shouldn’t you be more worried about the time you have left alive?”

“What-,”

Shinra grabbed the man’s hand, scalpel coming to rest on the tip of his finger, just under the start of his nail. “Tell me. The drugs. You used.”

Shizuo couldn’t stop how his eyes closed as the screaming started. Even shut it was as he could see the way Shinra slowly pressed his scalpel in under the man’s nail against the back of his lids.

It was revolting.

It was righteous.

“Stop! Stop it!”

The screaming was clanging in his head like temple bell. It was almost worse with his eyes closed, the sound seeming all the more heavy.

“Why should I stop when you never have?”

Shizuo forced his eyes open as Shinra pulled back, the man held his arm to his chest and sobbed. “Please.”

“That was only one … you’ve got nine nails left, not to mention your toes.”

“Fuck … you fucking psycho!”

“What drugs did you use?”

“I don’t fucking know, okay!?” The man shouted at a thoroughly displeased looking Shinra. “I got them off some dealer.”

“It’s like you don’t even want your fingernails,” Shinra sounded he was a parent dealing with an extremely spoilt child and not the attempted rapist he was currently torturing. “Oh well...”

“No, wait!” The man’s uninjured hand dove into his pocket, scrabbling to pull out a small vial. “Here, take it!”

Shinra snatched the empty vial from the man’s hand, quickly standing up as he read the label. “Vecuronium bromide, this … this is a medical grade neuromuscular-blocker.”

“Is that bad?” Shizuo asked with worry.

“Not exactly, but,” the man cringed as Shinra snapped that murderous look back on him, “how much did you dose him with?”

“Ha, like I know … enough to keep him down and,” -the man gave a bloody grin, “pliant.”

Motherfucker.

“At what time?”

“I don’t even know what time it is now … he knocked my lights out.”

Shinra sighed, sounding weary of the man’s entire personality. Shizuo was also done with him, but he’d been done with him the moment he walked in the door.

“What is it?”

“This drug, when properly administered,” Shinra shot at the attacker accusingly, “should wear off in less than an hour or so.”

Fuck. How long had it been since Shizuo arrived? It seemed like years had passed since he first kicked down the door.

“It’s been around forty minutes since you called, so give or take twenty minutes,” Shinra calculated, rolling the empty vial between his hands thoughtfully. “He should be awake by now.”

Shizuo shot an uneasy look behind him, the flea was still unmoving and unseeing. “What does that mean?”

“It means this moron,” -Shinra kicked carelessly at the man’s wounded foot making him flinch, “gave him an overdose.”

“Ha,” that annoying, high pitched laugh came out pained and wheezing. The man obviously thought he had nothing left to lose, or was just incapable of shutting the fuck up. “What a fucking waste, ay? I didn’t even get to come inside-,”

-Shizuo delivered a swift punch to the man’s temple, knocking him out flat. “Shut up!”

“Shizuo come here.” Shinra was back at Izaya’s side, digging into his medical bag. “I need your help.”

Shinra’s word were the only thing that stopped Shizuo from beating the man further. He returned to Izaya’s side, no visible change to see. Still lifeless.

“Let’s move him to the table … I need room to do this.” Shizuo had no idea what ‘this’ was, but he quickly followed Shinra’s instructions and picked up the flea.

Can he feel this?

Izaya weighs nothing in his arms.

Shizuo couldn’t dwell on the thought, following Shinra to the dining table with his greatest enemy cradled against his chest. If Izaya was aware, no doubt he would be mortified.

“I have no idea how he got it,” Shinra said as he kicked away a few dining chairs and pushed the pile of placemats and one lonely pot-plant to the opposite side and onto the floor. “But apart from medical use, Vecuronium is also used on prisoners in the United States as a means of carrying out the death penalty.”

“What!?” Shizuo yelled aghast. The fucking death penalty? The flea was going to die!? “What the fuck Shinra!?”

“I know,” he dumped his bag down, and started pulling out several items that Shizuo could not even begin to identify. “An overdose of the drug is administrated to paralyse the prisoner and stop their breathing. They also administer a sedative and potassium chloride to stop their heart, so I guess we can be thankful it’s just the Vecuronium, ne?”

“How can you be so fucking calm right now?”

Shinra didn’t answer, instead instructing, “Put him here, with his head just at the edge.”

More gently than he had ever treated the flea, Shizuo placed him down. He backed off immediately, Shinra switching places with him at the flea’s side.

“Izaya,” Shinra’s voice was clipped and professional as he pulled on white latex gloves, “I can’t reverse the effects of the drug so I’m going to put you on ventilation until the Vecuronium leaves your system.”

Izaya’s dead eyed stare was his only answer. Shinra gave a wry grin, “Shizuo and I am here, we won’t let anything happen to you.”

Shizuo doesn’t know why Shinra thought Izaya would take comfort in his presence, but he couldn’t be bothered to contradict it. Part of him still refused to believe that Izaya is actually awake and listening.

Shizuo watched as Shinra tightened a strange colourful belt thing around Izaya’s arm, before moving two fingers to press into his inner elbow. “I’m going to give you a pain reliever which should also make you drowsy … so don’t panic if you feel yourself going to sleep.”

“Shinra…”

It’s like Shinra thinks Izaya can hear him.

Shizuo’s heart breaks.

Satisfied with whatever it is the doctor feels, Shinra wipes at the flea’s skin with an alcohol wipe, before adding like an afterthought to Shizuo “what I really need is Sugammadex but it’s not something I carry with me, but not knowing exactly how much he was dosed with, it might not be enough.” Shizuo felt as if the walls were crumbling around him, felt like his own breath was beginning to slow. “Shizuo.”

He snapped back to reality, eyes wild as he looked at Shinra. “Breathe Shizuo, one thing at a time, alright?”

Fuck. Of course. He had to get it together, he couldn’t have a breakdown right now. Later, maybe, but now he needed to get his fucking head in the game.

It was easier said than done. Easy to think it … but actually doing it was a struggle on a whole other level. Shizuo hadn’t ever been in such a high stakes situation before.

Izaya could die. Right in front of him. What in the fucking hell.

“I-I thought you said a sedative could make it worse.” Shizuo struggled to get the words out.

“The main issue is he is struggling to breathe on his own, the ventilator will do that for him.” Shinra explains as he pulls out a new glass vial and a syringe.

He sticks the needle into the rubber top of the little bottle, liquid clear as water sucking into the syringe as Shinra pulls back the plunger. “This is a pain reliever and a sedative which can be used with neuromuscular-blockers … Vecuronium doesn’t block pain after all.”

Shizuo didn’t want to unpack all that just yet, because if what Shinra was saying meant what he thought it meant…

Don’t even think it.

Shinra quickly injects the contents of the needle into Izaya’s arm, and then he is moving to the other objects he pulled out of his bag.

There is a strange metal contraption with three parts. Two long arms that were held parallel to each other by what looked like a handle, both ending with a scooped edge. It almost looked like some sort of kitchen implement; like tongs with an extra arm. Then there’s a long white tube, each end capped with a plastic valve. Last is a small blue rubber cylindrical thing, that almost looked like a squashed football to Shizuo.

Shinra moved behind Izaya’s head, hands tilting the flea’s chin so it pointed slightly upwards. He picked up that silver tong thing in one hand, the other holding onto Izaya’s chin as it forced his mouth to open. Shizuo watched, half terrified, half fascinated, as Shinra slipped the bottom curved edge of the tool between Izaya’s parted lips.

Shizuo almost turned away as the long metal prongs disappeared into Izaya’s mouth, no doubt reaching all the way down to the back of his throat. Shinra removed his hand from Izaya’s chin, picking up his small torch and shining it into the flea’s mouth. He positioned the metal contraption this way and that way, like trying to find the perfect spot, before finally pushing it even further in.

Putting down the torch, Shinra’s pulled the handle and the two prongs seemed to spread slightly, and Shizuo couldn’t help but wonder if this was some sort of perverted torture method.

“Oi…”

“This is what the sedative is for … it won’t hurt him,” Shinra replied as if he could read Shizuo thoughts, though he never took his eyes off the procedure in front of him.

Shinra grabbed for the white tubing, “I’m going to need your help with the next part.”

Shizuo stood up a little straighter, ready to jump in at a moments notice.

He could do this.

Shinra had threaded the white tubing in-between the two prongs. In a swift manoeuvrer, he pulled the metal contraction out of Izaya’s throat while keeping the tubing in at the same time. He did it so smoothly Shizuo almost didn’t believe his eyes.

“Your first time?” He joked. Humour was supposed to be a coping mechanism or something, right?

Shinra gave a breathless laugh, “it’s a standard procedure taught in medical school.”

Shizuo half rolled his eyes, “like you’ve been to medical school.”

The both laughed, Shizuo’s coming out much more shaky than Shinra’s. He felt as if some of the tension had broken, like he could breathe just a little easier.

Thank fuck.

“Alright come here,” Shinra said as he connected the end of the tube sticking out of Izaya’s mouth with squishy football-looking thing from earlier.

Shizuo walked over hesitantly, feeling out of his depth as Shinra held the football in one hand, “You need to hold it like this and pump.” Shizuo watched Shinra give a steady squeeze. “Nice and regular, here you try.”

Shizuo was not ready as Shinra placed the blue pump in his hands. He almost fumbled the dam thing, quickly trying to make up for it by giving one panicked squeeze.

Inhale.

“Careful!” Shinra snapped, not helping at all. “Don’t break it.”

Hold.

“Fuck you, I’m trying,” Shizuo growled through gritted teeth. He gave another squeeze, this time more even and gentle.

Exhale.

“Good, that’s good,” Shinra encouraged, “just like that, slow and steady.”

Shizuo frowned, feeling only slightly patronized. Shinra grabbed the stethoscope from his neck and went back to listening to Izaya’s breathing.

“Did it work?” Is he okay?

“Hmm,” Shinra hummed, not outright ignoring Shizuo but it was enough to piss him off. Slightly. The doctor did seem a little preoccupied. “I certainly hope so.”

Well that went without saying, right? Fucking shitty doctor. Shinra pulled back, tugging the stethoscope out of his ears and placing it back around his neck with a sigh. He pulled off his glasses, rubbing between his eyes with his thumb and forefinger.

“This is the most we can do for now.” That sounded like fucking bullshit, surely they should be doing more. “I have my own ventilation machine at home, I’ll ask Celty to bring it. I don’t want to move him any more than necessary.”

Shizuo could imagine trying to move the flea and him all the way to Ikebukuro would be a little logistically complicated at the moment. So he were stuck here until Celty could bring relief, Shizuo helping his enemy fucking breathe of all things.

Shinra slumped down in one of the still upright dining chairs. He looked exhausted. “What a day.”

You’re telling me.

Shinra looked up at him with a mischievous grin, hand still steadily supplying oxygen to the flea. “This sure is a sight though, I should take a picture so I can prove to Izaya that you actually helped save his life.”

Shizuo almost squashed the ventilator, air shooting out his nostrils in a violent huff.

“Hah hah,” he responded sarcastically. “You’re lucking I’m too busy saving his life to punch you.”

Shinra giggled, laying his arms down on the table next to Izaya. “You’re a funny man, Shizuo-kun.”

That annoying honorific was back, no doubt Shinra’s version of taking the kid gloves off. Did this mean Shizuo had finally gained some control of his panic … he certainly felt a bit calmer. Though a small, weak part of him just wanted to sit down and cry.

Shizuo watched as the doctor put his head in his arms, groaning once to himself before standing back up. “Now, for more unpleasant things.”

Like everything before had been a fucking enjoyable walk in the park.

Shizuo frowned, Shinra grabbed another vial and syringe from his bag. “What are you doing?” He called as the doctor made his way over the crumpled form of the man who had caused all this.

“Sedating him, unless you’d like him to wake up and starting talking again.”

No, Shizuo very much did not want that.

“What do we do with him?”

“I’m up for some dismemberment if you are,” Shinra only half sounded like he was joking. “I can think of a few body parts to start with.”

“I don’t want to watch you cut someone’s dick off.” No matter how much the filth deserved it.

“Ah, you’re right,” Shinra sighed dramatically. “I guess it’s only right to leave him to Izaya’s capable hands, ne? Some might call that a fate worse than death.”

Shizuo wasn’t sure how he felt about that idea. It was true that anything they could do would probably pale in comparison when compared to Izaya’s unique brand of vengeance. Shizuo was guessing there would be no shortage of psychological warfare before Izaya either forced the man take his own life or had him killed.

Shizuo didn’t want any of them to have anything to do with the filth now drooling onto the flea’s floor. Certainly not Izaya. He shouldn’t have to see that piece of shit ever again.

But that’s not how Izaya would see it, would he? No doubt he would want to deal with it himself like Shinra said. The thought had him more anxious than Shizuo was willing to admit.

Unbidden, Shinra’s earlier words came back to him.

“It’s going to be okay, Izaya.”

“Was he awake?”

His voice came out quiet, almost a whisper as he looked down at the now closed eyes of the flea … Shinra must’ve shut them at some point.

Shinra had spoken to him like he wasn’t stuck in some kind of stasis. Like he was awake and aware, could hear and feel, but was just still.

Shinra had come back, the blanket from earlier in hand as he chose not to answer at first. Shizuo watched as the doctor placed the blanket over Izaya, that same soft look in his face that Shizuo had heard in his voice earlier.

“In layman's terms, the drug blocks neuromuscular transmission, so the signals between the brain and muscles you could say.” Shizuo listened with a frown to Shinra’s medical mumbo-jumbo; not entirely sure he wanted to know. “It’s not known to affect any other neurons, and patients who have experience with the drug have reported still being able to feel pain and hear their surroundings. Which is why it’s almost always used in conjunction with a sedative and a pain reliever.”

Shinra paused, tucking the edges of the blanket under Izaya’s feet. The next time he spoke, his voice was so soft it almost trembled, “He most likely was aware.”

Shizuo felt numb.

What could that feel like? To be paralysed head to toe? While some bastard fucking forced-,

Snap!

“Ah, Shizuo-kun!” Shinra gave a yelp as the hand that had been gripping the edge of the table by Izaya’s head broke off a large chunk. “Izaya is going to be mad if you break his stuff.”

Izaya might have other fucking things on his damn mind than a stupid broken table.

“What the actual fuck Shinra!?” Shizuo’s tumultuous rage poured into his words. He couldn’t lose control off his body, not when he was busy keeping the fucking flea alive. “What the fuck happened today?”

Shinra only sighed in response, sounding as tired as Shizuo felt.

“We should kill that rapist piece of shit, or at least call the police or something.”

“We could, and then we could keep Izaya sedated indefinitely so he never finds out. Unless you want to deal with his wrath?”

Surely a normal person would want the person who drugged and assaulted them arrested and charged? For fuck sakes the man had almost killed him. Then again, the flea was far from normal.

“He’ll want to deal with this himself,” Shinra repeated once again.

“And what if he goes off the fucking deep-end trying to get revenge?” Shizuo argues. What if the flea got hurt again in some twisted quest for payback. What if killed someone. What if he got killed.

“It’s not up to us Shizuo.”

“Tch.”

“You almost sound like you care about what happens to him.” Shizuo snaps his gaze to meet Shinra’s with fury … who only looks mildly entertained. Bastard.

“Shut up Shinra.” Shizuo almost wanted to growl at how hard it was to stop his body from leaping over the table and punching the shitty doctor. He had to stay by Izaya’s side, had to keep breathing for him.

He wants to go home. Wants to sleep and forget this day had ever happened. Shizuo closed his eyes and tried to count to ten, tried to ignore the way Shinra’s words burrowed into his mind and took hold.

“Would it be such a bad thing if you did?”

[kittyfeli]

Jour 20 - Menaces

Theme given by @whumpreads for Inktober 2017!

[ CW : Menaces de mort ]

Une journée des plus normales se terminait, dans le quartier d’Ikebukuro, à Tokyo. Un grand Russe à l’accent prononcé faisait la promotion des sushis de son restaurant, des lycéens rentraient chez eux après une longue journée de cours, les gangs commençaient à se rassembler dans les ruelles. Au milieu de cette anormale normalité au sein de ce quartier, d’ordinaire en proie aux évènements les plus curieux, le calme fragile se fit soudainement rompre. Un distributeur automatique traversa le ciel, venant s’écraser avec fracas, manquant de tomber sur un homme en pleine fuite. Une surprise générale s’éleva de la foule, et les passants s’arrêtèrent net, afin de témoigner de cette course-poursuite entre les deux êtres les plus dangereux d’Ikebukuro ; Izaya Orihara et Shizuo Heiwajima. Il n’était pas rare de voir ces deux-là se battre, mais lorsque cela arrivait, mieux valait ne pas se mettre en travers de leur chemin, au risque de terminer à l’hôpital, ou pire encore.

 « Izaya ! »

 Comme à son habitude, Shizuo interpelait son ennemi tout en lui courant après. Apparemment, jamais encore n’était-il parvenu à l’attraper. Mais au vu de la haine brûlant au sein de ses prunelles marrons, il y avait fort à parier que celui-ci le regretterait amèrement, le jour où cela viendrait à arriver. Malheureusement pour le géant, cependant, le fugitif possédait une agilité hors du commun, lui permettant de se faufiler facilement entre les gens, rendant la progression de son poursuivant plus compliquée, ce qui ne faisait que l’enrager d’autant plus.

Si tu viens à Ikebukuro, je te tuerai, ne cessait-il de menacer. Et pourtant, il n’en était toujours rien malgré les nombreuses fois où Izaya l’avait provoqué.

Le Russe, Simon, réputé lui aussi pour sa force colossale, observait la scène d’un regard désapprobateur. Il détestait la violence, plus que tout au monde. Maintes fois il avait tenté de les arrêter dans leurs bagarres, et, malgré tout, celles-ci finissaient toujours par reprendre. Ces deux-là représentaient le jour et la nuit ; deux entités opposées, mais dont l’on ne pouvait imaginer l’une sans l’autre.

Quelques secondes plus tard, ils disparurent de la place centrale, comme s’ils n’y avaient jamais été. Pour seule trace de leur passage ne restait que ce distributeur, maintenant hors service. Leur course se poursuivit au travers de rues plus isolées, plus éloignées, sans que jamais l’un ne parvienne à s’enfuir, ni que l’autre n’arrive à l’attraper.

Puis, finalement, Izaya se mit à ralentir, avant de s’arrêter. Shizuo imita son geste, suspicieux. Ce manipulateur devait certainement préparer quelque chose. Et, en effet, il fit bien de ne pas baisser sa garde, car en l’espace d’une demi-seconde, le garçon aux cheveux noirs s’était retourné, lançant l’un de ses couteaux de poche en direction du visage du blond, qui l’esquiva de justesse. Seule une petite coupure marqua sa joue, un fin trait rougeoyant apparaissant alors à ce niveau. Les lèvres du fugitif s’étaient étirées en un large sourire. Il replaça sa main dans la poche de son manteau, avant de hausser les épaules, d’un air presque dépité.

 « Bon, on s’arrête là pour aujourd’hui ? Je suis crevé, j’ai assez couru.

- Tu te fous de moi ? rétorqua Shizuo.

- Pas que je sache, non.

- Tu prends ça pour un jeu ?

- Parce que ce n’en est pas un ? »

 Cette question avait été posée d’un ton étrange venant de l’informateur, presque froid. Il s’agissait de quelque chose de tellement inhabituel que le géant sentit un frémissement traverser son corps l’espace d’un court instant. D’un agile pas de félin, Izaya s’approcha de son adversaire, qui demeura impassible. Malgré la dangerosité dont pouvait faire preuve le plus petit, il en fallait plus pour l’impressionner, lui qui avait déjà voulu refermer une profonde plaie ouverte à l’aide de super glue. Il s’apprêtait simplement à parer une éventuelle attaque surprise de sa part.

Mais il n’en fut rien. L’informateur se contenta de placer son index sous le menton de l’ancien barman, qui serra les mâchoires suite à ce contact avec son ennemi de toujours.

 « Après tout, te connaissant, si tu voulais vraiment me tuer, tu l’aurais déjà fait. Je me trompe ?

- Tu peux parler, hein.

- C’est différent. Moi, je veux m’amuser un peu avec toi, avant. »

 Ces mots prononcés, il attrapa le plus grand par le col de se chemise afin de le forcer à se pencher en avant, et déposa sans prévenir ses lèvres contre les siennes. Shizuo écarquilla les yeux, lorsque cela arriva, trop hébété pour le repousser. Son esprit ne comprenait pas ce qui était en train d’arriver. Malgré le dégoût que lui inspirait Izaya dans son intégralité, jamais il ne l’aurait pensé capable de faire preuve d’un semblant de douceur. Car, oui, le baiser fut tendre, presque chaleureux. Et le temps qu’il prenne pleinement conscience de la situation, les deux hommes se retrouvaient de nouveau séparés.

Les joues rougies par l’embarras, il serra les poings, mais, alors qu’il s’apprêtait à s’élancer de nouveau à sa poursuite, il remarqua que son ennemi s’était déjà considérablement éloigné, lui faisant de grands gestes d’adieu, jovialement.

 « Allez, je me retire, mon petit Shizuo ! On jouera de nouveau ensemble une prochaine fois, j’ai du boulot qui m’attend !

- Je crois pas, parce que la prochaine fois que tu te montres, je t’éclate !

- Ooh, des menaces, encore ? ricana le brun.

- Nan, une promesse, cette fois ! »

 Et tandis que son ennemi disparut au détour d’une ruelle, le grand blond poussa un lourd soupir. Ce qu’il pouvait détester ce parasite…

 « … »

 Après une petite hésitation, il passa son pouce contre ses lèvres. Il pouvait encore sentir la présence de l’informateur contre celles-ci.

Cette douceur singulière… Cette tendresse inattendue… Il se surprit à se demander s’il aurait la possibilité d’y regoûter, un jour.

[lavenderboneswrites]

Chapters: 1/6 Fandom: Durarara!! Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con Relationships: Heiwajima Shizuo/Orihara Izaya, Kishitani Shinra/Celty Sturluson Characters: Heiwajima Shizuo, Orihara Izaya, Kishitani Shinra, Celty Sturluson Summary:

Shizuo witnesses an incredible act of violence against his most hated enemy. Left to pick up the pieces, he finds himself experiencing unwanted side-effects, all while forced to deal with the very person he claims to hate.

[lavenderboneswrites]

Chapter 2 Update

Fandom: Durarara!! Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con Relationships: Heiwajima Shizuo/Orihara Izaya, Kishitani Shinra/Celty Sturluson Characters: Heiwajima Shizuo, Orihara Izaya, Kishitani Shinra, Celty Sturluson

Chapter 2 Summary:

Shizuo deals with debilitating side-effects and has a violent altercation with Izaya.

[lavenderboneswrites]

Heart Over Ice

***please read the tags*** ***trigger warning***

Chapter 3 has been updated! Also available on AO3

Chapter Summary:  

Shizuo tries to take positive steps to move on with his life, which would be a hell of a lot easier if Izaya wasn't in it. Shizuo finds drinking plus Izaya leads to bad decisions and even worse consequences.

Tags: Attempted Rape/Non-Con, Attempted Murder, Sexual Assault, Attempted Sexual Assault, Non-Consensual Drug Use, drug induced paralysis, Medical Procedures, Trauma, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Psychological Trauma, Discussion of Rape, Discussion of sexual assault, Discussion of Death, discussion of trauma, Triggers, discussion of triggers, Panic Attacks, explicit descriptions of panic attacks, Canon-Typical Violence, aka Shizuo typical violence, Protective Heiwajima Shizuo, Shizuo-centric, Binge Drinking, Angst with a Happy Ending, Minor Kishitani Shinra/Celty Sturluson, minor original characters, Minor Character Death, Eventual Smut, eventual consensual smut, Eventual Romance, Eventual Happy Ending, Pre-Relationship, First Aid, Mentions of Yakuza, Drug Dealing, Thoughts of Self-harm, Self-Harm, Torture, Disassociation

Chapter 3 - Over Active

If Shinra didn’t have a fully stocked bar, Shizuo doesn’t know if he’d actually be here.

It had been a few days since the nightclub incident, and Shizuo is determined to put everything behind him. He starts by trying to take a little better care of himself. He’s forcing himself to eat, three meals a day, and he’s trying to cut back on the smokes.

Shizuo had also taken up jogging, thinking that maybe if he exhausts his body he’ll be too tired for insomnia and nightmares. There is something nice about the anonymity. In his exercise gear no one seems to notice him, the citizen’s blissfully unaware of the infamous monster of Ikebukuro running around the neighbourhood.

He still feels anxious, still sees Izaya being assaulted when he closes his eyes and hears those thoughts of self-harm … but he tries his best to ignore them. It’s not an easy feat. Though thankfully, there haven’t been any more of the really violent flashbacks like in the alley. Probably something to do with not being around Izaya. Leave it to the flea to be the one to set him off, he was aptly skilled in that department after all.

The running helps, but Shizuo finds his mind would wander too freely even though his body was occupied. So he got some headphones and signed up for Spotify, trying to replace any risky thoughts with music. He doesn’t really know much about music, and he follows Kasuka for guidance. Shizuo finds his tastes are varying and wide, from rap to obscure indie; he isn’t fussed and more importantly, it helps. He’s enjoying it.

This new self-care routine also dictates he reach out to his friends, which is why he found himself unable to refuse an invitation to dinner at Shinra and Celty’s.

They greeted him at the door cheerfully, Celty in a pink frilly apron over her black catsuit and Shinra already a drink deep if his glass was an indication.

The apartment was warm, with a delicious smell was wafting from the kitchen. Celty quickly left them to get back to preparing her feast, leaving Shizuo to cross the room and jump behind the bar.

“What are we drinking?”

It was just the three of them, which Shizuo was secretly thankful for … he didn’t think he could deal with huge crowds of people right now. Just the thought of anyone accidentally touching him had Shizuo wanting to scratch off his own skin.

Shinra sat down on one of the stools at the counter, answering lively. “Whiskey!”

The same kind the colour of Izaya’s-

Nope, don’t go there.

“Gross,” Shizuo shot at Shinra, who scrunched up his face in response.

“Then make me a drink, oh wise bartender-sama,” Shinra sniggered into his drink.

“Shut up.”

Shizuo pulled down various bottles from the shelf, lining them up on the benchtop. “My, my, looking to get lit, Shizuo-kun,” Shizuo shot a disparaging look at Shinra and his use of the word ‘lit’. Where did he come up with this shit? “We’ve got vodka, tequila, gin, Cointreau, and even white rum!” Shinra tapped each of the bottles on the lid as he named them.

“Some of these aren’t even opened, this bar is wasted on you shitty doctor,” Shizuo grumbled, looking for lemon juice and sugar syrup.

“What can I say, I’m the only one who can drink … do you expect me to clear out all these bottles by myself?”

“I think you’ll be flat on the floor from just one.”

“You’re soooooo meeeeaaaaaan~!” Shinra wailed dramatically.

“Lightweight.” Shizuo added with a grin. For the first time in a long time he actually felt not terrible. It was nice, seeing his friends, bantering with Shinra and getting drunk. This is what he needed.

“Where’s your ice?”

“Kitchen-, no,” Shinra held up a hand to stop Shizuo who had turned to head just there. “Don’t think I’ll let you go and steal my chance to have a moment alone with Celty!”

“Just get the ice you dumbass.”

Shinra giggled as he ran like an idiot to the kitchen, Shizuo rolling his eyes at the lovestruck fool.

“Lemon too!” Shizuo called out as an afterthought, but he doubted it was heard over Shinra’s squeal of ‘Ceeeellllltttttyyyyy~!’

Thankfully the door swung shut on the doctor’s wails of love.

Shizuo pulled out a silver cocktail shaker out from underneath the bar, setting up all his tools and ingredients in a line with two glasses on standby.

It shouldn’t take more than thirty seconds to get ice, yet Shinra had been gone at least a couple of minutes.

Yeah, Shizuo really didn’t want to know…

The kitchen door swung open, giggles and black smoke pouring out. Shizuo half wanted to roll his eyes and half couldn’t help but think Shinra and Celty were kind of cute.

I’ve lost my goddamn fucking mind.

Shinra basically fell out of the kitchen door, his cheeks rosy red, ice in one hand and a chopping board with lemon wedges in the other. “I will miss you every moment you are not in my presence my love~!”

Black smoke pushed him out the door, motion belaying Celty’s mortification at Shinra’s frankly embarrassing behaviour.

You horny fuckers.

Shizuo could only shake his head as Shinra skipped back to him and dumped the ice try on the counter.

“You’re disgusting.”

“Huh?” Shinra said aghast. “My love is beautiful and pure, Shizuo-kun!”

“Like I said … disgusting.”

Shinra chuckled as Shizuo split the ice between the glasses and cocktail shaker and started measuring out shots

“This drink actually has all five of these? Are you trying to kill me?”

Shizuo gave a mischievous grin, “step up your game, shitty doctor … I thought we were getting ‘lit’.”

“Ugh,” Shinra groaned. “Why are you in such a good mood anyway?”

Shizuo shrugged, pouring shots over ice. Maybe it was the self-care, or maybe just good food and good people. Whatever it was he would take it, if only for tonight.

“Hmm,” Shinra had a shrewd look on his face, like he was suspicious. “Celty’s theories on alien imposters might not be far off…”

“Piss off.”

Shizuo finished adding the various liquids into the cocktail shaker, before capping the lid over the top and picking it up.

“It’s a shame you know,” Shinra said as Shizuo started to shake the cylinder over his shoulder, “you’re really good at this, you should try and get another bartending job.”

Shizuo snorted, careful not to lose his cool and send the cocktail shaker into the mirrored shelves behind him. “What? So I can get fired from that too? Anyway, I have a job.”

A perfectly fine one, thank you very much … and if Shizuo didn’t bring up why he got fired from those other jobs, well, whatever.

“But this suits you, you seem…” Shinra trailed off, like he couldn’t quite think of the word to describe Shizuo. “Content?”

Another half shrug, Shizuo placing the shaker back on the bar and hitting the sides of the metal lightly. Very lightly. He’d exploded his fair share of these shakers when he had first been learning to tend bar. The ice caused the container to get cold and expand, making the lid stick; the tapping helped pull it off easier.

“You have a lot of control when like this!” Shinra sounded fascinated as Shizuo grabbed the strainer. He didn’t really think about it to be honest, but he could see where Shinra was coming from. Personally, Shizuo thought Shinra would be equally fascinated if he were to crush the entire bar instead.

Shinra gave an over the top ‘oooh’ when Shizuo flipped the strainer one handed, doing a spinning trick with it between his fingers before placing it over the rim of a glass. Heh, he’d have to show Shinra some more tricks later, maybe when Celty was around to watch.

“Maybe you should be the one to take up the knives! You’re plenty dexterous.”

Shizuo made a face at that, somewhere between revulsion and disgust “don’t be gross Shinra.”

The doctor just sniggered in reply.

Shizuo split his creation into two glasses filled with ice. For final touches he topped the drinks with cola and a lemon wedge each. “Here you go, one long island iced tea.”

Shinra took the drink Shizuo slid across the bar, looking down at the black-brown concoction. “You really are trying to kill me.”

“Hah!” Shizuo laughed, pulling his own drink to his lips and inhaling the scent. “Weak.”

“Not all of us have a superhuman tolerance! Why would you even choose to make this?” Shinra sounded plenty aghast yet he still drank all the same.

“Alcohol tastes like shit…” Shizuo said as if that explained anything.

“So you make this five shots abomination!?”

“Doesn’t taste like alcohol.”

“That’s what makes it so dangerous! Jeez Shizuo-kun, you’re such a sadist.”

Shizuo only smirked over the rim of his glass. Taking a sip, he gave a noise of satisfaction at the way the drink flooded his mouth and rushed down his throat.

It was smooth as hell.

“Still got it,” Shizuo said more to himself than Shinra. To which the doctor only groaned in reply.

“Izaya’s right, you are arrogant.”

Shizuo immediately felt his pleasant mood snap.

Izaya kicking him, threatening him. Izaya’s dead eyes. Izaya’s jerking head. A dark stain on denim.

“I’m warning you Shinra … don’t fucking bring him up.”

Shinra sighed, “you guys really need to come to some sort of truce, I’m getting tired of the constant fighting.”

Shinra was tired? Well Shizuo was fucking exhausted.

“Fuck off Shinra … never gonna happened.”

Shinra didn’t answer, just took small sips of his drink, looking thoughtful.

“By the way, how are you doing with all that?”

“With all what?” Shizuo snapped, his gut clenched uncomfortably.

Shinra gave him a deadpan look, as if he knew Shizuo was being purposely dense. “I just meant … it was pretty traumatic.”

Shizuo slammed his glass down with more force than necessary. “I'm not-”

-Not what? Not traumatised?  

“I mean … just-just shut up Shinra.”

Shinra looked at Shizuo calmly, only the slight raising of his brow to show he clearly thought differently. It was the same kind of patronising look Shizuo saw on the flea. The doctor obviously had a death wish or something, because he was silent for only a moment before he opened his big fat mouth again.

“Izaya is acting like he’s not affected, but I think he was really shaken by it all.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“What do you mean you know?”

Oh shit, fuck, now Shizuo was the one who couldn’t keep his mouth shut.

“We had a run in, he was…” Shizuo tried to think of a sufficient way to describe the flea’s almost manic behaviour. Though compared to Shizuo’s own, it was probably a lot less pathetic. “He was pissed.”

Pissed was putting it lightly, raging lunatic more like it. Which was ironic as hell considering Shizuo’s own anger issues.

Shizuo himself was still furious at the fact the little bastard had kicked him and then almost gouged out his eyes.

Fucking psycho.

Shinra made an exasperated sound, “he won’t talk to me at all! He keeps leaving me on read … why, oh why did I choose the two most difficult people in the country to be my friends?”

“Sounds like a blessing in disguise to me … you should take this as an opportunity to ditch him once and for all.”

“Shizuo-kun!” Shinra admonished, though he sounded a little entertained. “No! Stop changing the subject! How are you? Are you eating well? Sleeping enough?”

“What are you, my mother?”

“Celty would want me to ask these questions about my friends!”

“Ah, so you’re doing her dirty work.”

Shinra made an ‘oh shit’ face. Of course Celty had sent Shinra to do some digging, seeing how Shizuo had been purposely avoiding her. It was only right she was worried.

Shizuo took a longer sip of his drink, finishing the entire last half in one gulp. Really, he was just buying time.

“You can tell her, yes, I’m eating. Three meals a day and all.”

“And what about your mood? Have you got a good sleep pattern going?”

“You’re about to fucking see my mood, Shi-n-ra!”

Shizuo and Shinra managed to get one more drink in before dinner; yuzu hachimitsu sour, weak. After all, he didn’t want to actually kill Shinra, not really. They moved to the dining table, a veritable feast laid out on the table. Shizuo tried to ignore the way his mind went to memories of Izaya laid out on his own table.

“Wow Celty, this looks amazing.”

It was like a huge order at an Izakaya, with lots of individual dishes. Shizuo could spot edamame, karaage, yakitori, and takoyaki … just to name a few.

Shinra was hanging off the Dullahan, singing her praises. “My Celty is a MasterChef~!”

“Mm, more like Iron Chef!” Shizuo added, feeling pleasantly buzzed two drinks deep.

Celt’s smoke merely puffed in that flustered way of hers. [Stop it, both of you!]

Shinra and Shizuo only laughed, Shinra exclaiming how cute she was when embarrassed.

It was only when they were all taking a seat at the table, about to dig in, that there was a knock on the door.

“Hm, who could that be?” Shinra asked, standing up as Shizuo’s brows furrowed.

Apparently, no one good.

Shinra was only gone for a few minutes before he returned, “look who I found!”

Celty’s black smoke exploded, almost like one giant explanation point. Shizuo on the other snapped the flimsy wooden chopsticks in his hand clean in half.

Standing in the door, in all his shitty glory, was the fucking flea.

“I told you Shinra I’m not staying-,”

“-Nonsense!” Shinra flapped his hands, as if waving Izaya’s protests off. “There’s plenty for all of us, and you could do with a good meal, you’re skin and bones!”

“What are you, my mother?”

Shizuo growled as Shinra let out a high pitched laugh, no doubt remembering Shizuo exact same expression from earlier.

“What’s so funny?” Izaya snapped, looking far from pleased with the situation. His eyes caught Shizuo’s, narrowing in a look nothing short of hatred.

Next time, come at me like you want to kill me.

Shizuo’s hand gripped the underside of the table. Shadows were immediately tugging at him gently, and Shizuo realised he had stood without thinking.

Shizuo growled, slumping back down into his seat. It had been established long ago that Shinra and Celty’s apartment was a neutral zone, Switzerland if you will. Though it was less a decision on Shizuo’s part and more the fact Shinra and Celty were sick of having their furniture thrown through their walls after missing a certain slippery bastard.

Hell, Shizuo was going to need a hundred more drinks before he even thought of letting the flea have dinner with them.

At least this time he wasn’t threatening to cut out Shizuo’s eyes. Or drugged.

He still looks like he’d try and skewer me given the chance.

“No way Shinra … get rid of him.”

“Yes please Shinra, ‘get rid of me’,” Izaya parroted back, raising his fingers to do mocking air quotations. “You know I think I might actually stay now.”

Izaya sat down in the chair opposite Shizuo with an infuriating smirk. “Watching a beast eat in its natural habitat, a video of that is bound to fetch a high price.”

“Izaya,” Shinra warned as Shizuo threw his broken chopsticks across the table at the flea. The bastard merely leaned to the left and avoided them with a gleeful little laugh.

[Please don’t throw things]

“Sorry Celty,” and now Shizuo felt guilty.

[Don’t be sorry, I don’t want him here either!]

“Why do I get the feeling Courier-san is not writing anything too kind about me, ne?”

Celty pulled her PDA close to her chest, like she was afraid Izaya would try and take the device from her and read it.

“Because no one likes you, shithead.”

“I do.”

“Shut up Shinra.”

“Yeah, shut up Shinra,” Izaya mocked, once again copying Shizuo.

“Can you not be annoying for more than five minutes?”

“That depends, can you not be a beast for more than five minutes?”

“Argh!” Shizuo wanted to flip the table but then all Celty’s hard work would go to waste.

“How fascinating, the language of Neanderthals…”

“Give it a rest, both of you!” Shinra’s words did not match the amusement in his voice or the way he was trying to stifle his laughter. “You’re ruining my Celty’s wonderful dinner!”

[Ah Shinra- it’s fine]

“I want a drink-“

“-Oi!” Shizuo yelled as the flea reached out and snatched away his drink. “Get your own, you damn parasite.”

Izaya took a sip and made thoughtful face, “this is good … a little sweet for my taste but the sour really cuts through it. I’m amazed someone without a head is such a capable chef, well done Courier-san.”

[Oh…]

Shinra burst out laughing, collapsing to the floor in hysterics.

“What?” Izaya snapped, glaring at Shinra who was struggling to pull himself back up through his laughter.  

“Oi, oi, oi...” Shizuo could feel a vein throbbing in his temple.

Shinra wheezed as his head popped up, tears of laughter visible in his eyes. “Celty didn’t make that.”

Izaya looked down once at the drink in his hand, then once to Shinra, who had collapsed again in a fit of giggles, and then to Shizuo.

Shizuo watched as the flea’s eyes widened in realization and something akin to horror, before narrowing in distaste, “…gross.”

“Fuck you, you just said it was good.”

Shinra was howling.

“I lied, it’s called being a good guest … you should try it, Shizu-chan.”

“Bullshit!”

Izaya answered with a smirk, taking another long sip of Shizuo’s drink and then spitting it all back out.

“What the fuck flea!?”

“Want your drink back now?”

[Are you children!?]

“You couldn’t pay me to drink your dirty flea backwash.”

“You couldn’t afford my backwash.”

[How is this conversation happening?! Shinra, do something…]

Shinra was however too busy cackling on the floor, as if this was the funniest thing he had ever witnessed.  

[Shinra!!!!!!!!]

*

Dinner had been nothing short of hairy. Shizuo barely managed not to leap over the table and throttle the flea. Shinra was wasted, though he finally managed to pull himself back into his chair after much amusement at Shizuo’s and Izaya’s expense. Celty just raised her arms to where her head should be, as if holding it in her hands and crying.

The food was amazing. Though Izaya found ways to sneak in those backhanded little comments every now and again. He would also contradict Shizuo at every turn. If Shizuo would say he really liked a sauce or the karaage, Izaya would say he wasn’t a fan and make some slight criticism of it.

‘It’s too salty’, or ‘I’ve had better’.

Though every time he did Shinra would vehemently defend Celty’s cooking and admonish Izaya’s manners or lack their off.

Now that had been satisfying. Especially the way Izaya’s nose would scrunch up in that annoyed way of his, like he almost felt betrayed by Shinra.

That was until Shinra told Shizuo to stop antagonising Izaya. Like, what the fuck? Shizuo was doing no such thing. It was all the flea! He had said as much anyway.

After dinner, which Shizuo was honestly surprised hadn’t turned into a full on food fight (which had happened many times before), they had moved back into the living room, Celty suggesting drinks and desert.

Though Shizuo had imagined she had tea or coffee in mind and not more alcohol.

“I want a desert cocktail Shizuo-kun~!”

“Mm,” Shizuo agreed as he and Shinra headed to the bar.

[No! No more alcohol!]

“Let’s put on some music.”

“Yes! Impromptu dance party!”

[Shinra you’re drunk!]

“I don’t think they’re paying attention Courier-san.”

Celty slumped into an armchair, apparently giving up all hope of calling any of them to heel.

Shizuo once again slid behind the bar while Shinra scrolled through his phone. “Any requests?”

“Rock.”

“Pop.”

Shizuo and Izaya spoke at exactly the same time, then proceeded to glare daggers at the other. Shizuo quickly opened his mouth again but it seemed Izaya had a similar idea.

“Rap.”

“Punk.”

Son of a bitch was just doing it on purpose now.

“I wanna listen to WAP!”

“Shinra no.”

“Shinra yes.”

Shizuo couldn’t help himself, if Izaya said pop Shizuo said rock, if he said punk than Shizuo said rap, and if Izaya said no then he had to say yes.

Maybe Shinra had a point and they were both as bad as each other?

No way. Shizuo might have his flaws, huge gaping ones, but compared to the flea he was miles ahead.

He is the worst.

Izaya looked extremely affronted at the music starting playing out of the small portable speaker next to the tv. Shizuo merely grinned, feeling victorious as he mixed together something sweet and smokey.

“Yeah, you fucken with some wet ass puss-,” Shinra made a muffled noise of protest as Izaya clasped a palm over his mouth to stifle his singing.

“I can’t believe you’ve done this,” he said deadpan.

“What the hell carl!” Shinra yelled back. Shizuo frankly had no idea what language they were talking anymore. It must be some weird flea-Shinra code only discernible to their ears.

“You’re going to scar your girlfriend for life, and me,” Izaya said as he and Shinra wrestled over control of the music. “What is this, YouTube? Shinra you heathen, where is your Spotify?”

Shinra replied by wrapping his arms around Izaya’s neck and hanging off him like some sort of tree monkey. “I don’t have it” Shinra sobbed.

“Yes you do it’s right here … wait,” Izaya snapped a wicked smirk onto Shizuo, “you’re following this neanderthal?”

Shizuo huffed, topping off two golden yellow drinks with a cinnamon stick each. “Shizuo-kun has really good taste Izaya … here I like this playlist.”

“Hmm,” Izaya hummed thoughtfully, scrolling through the list as if he was searching through dirty laundry. Just what secrets did he think a fucking playlist held for fuck sakes.

“Oi, Shinra.”

The doctor was quick to drop his attentions of Izaya and bound over like an excited puppy. “Oooh it looks so cool Shizuo-kun!”

“Ha, wait for it,” Shizuo pulled out his lighter, Shinra letting out more sounds of awe as he lit the ends of the two cinnamon sticks. They caught fire quickly, before simmering down to a small smoky ember. “My twist on an old fashioned.”

Shinra clapped happily, meanwhile Shizuo could see Izaya glaring from over the doctor’s shoulder. Bitter fucken flea.

“It’s goooooooodd! What is that? Maple?”

“Yeah.”

“Ooh I’m getting hints of citrus too!”

“That’s the orange peel.”

“Celty, you’ve got to try this!” Shinra ran over to his girlfriend with his drink outstretched, seemingly forgetting she couldn’t taste without a head.

Shizuo took a satisfying sip of his own drink, the end of the cinnamon stick still smoking lazily. His eyes met Izaya’s over the rim of his glass, the flea looking down his nose at him with that same scrunched up look again. With a sigh he selected a song, throwing Shinra’s phone to the couch before making his way over.

Shizuo stilled his breath, body tense as if awaiting an attack. It would be just like Izaya to try and kill him to some jaunty pop tune.

“I want a drink.”

“Haaah?” Shizuo would say he was appalled at Izaya’s lack of manners if he hadn’t know the bastard for nearly a decade. The flea sat down in front of him, looking up at him with an expectant smirk. “I’m not wasting a good drink on your dirty backwash.”

Izaya rolled his eyes. “Something bitter.”

“Like you need it.”

“So quick-witted, don’t hurt yourself, Shizu-chan.”

Shizuo was half tempted to pull the cinnamon stick out of his drink and shove it up Izaya’s nose. “Fine, you want a drink … I’ll making you a fucking drink.”

Izaya only looked entertained as Shizuo started grabbing bottles with a rough fury.

“Celty let’s dance!”

“Ugh, they’re so precious it makes me want to vomit,” Izaya mocked as Shinra started trying to twirl Celty around the room, much to Celty’s protests.

“I think they’re cute,” Shizuo snapped, unable to not contradict Izaya.

“That’s disgusting Shizu-chan,” Izaya looked like he was one step away from trying to wash Shizuo’s mouth out with soap. “I shudder to even think about what you consider romantic.”

“Then don’t think about it.”

“There’s some new gorilla’s at the zoo, maybe you could attract one with your beastly wiles.”

“You really never fucking shut up.”

Though Shizuo could vividly remember a time when Izaya had been silent. Unmoving.

Don’t.

Izaya put a finger to his lips, but the action was ruined by the way his mouth turned up at the corners, as if he wasn’t even trying all that hard not to laugh. Shizuo took in the way his eyes danced with playful amusement. It was a good look on him, much better than-

-don’t think about.

“Of course you’d pick this trash song, matches your shitty personality.”

“Oh?” Izaya leant back on stool, balancing on two legs before falling back to four. “Isn’t this your playlist Shizu-chan?”

“I’m deleting it,” Izaya just had to go and get his flea stench all over a goddamn song of all things. Shizuo would never be able to listen to it again without thinking of him and that was just too gross to think about.

Izaya let out a peal of laughter, similar to the way he had laughed at Shizuo in that alley. “Your single cell brain works in such mysterious ways, it almost makes me sick … but here’s hoping I can ruin this playlist, nay, music entirely, for you.”

Shizuo had half a mind to spit in the bastards drink and then force it down his throat … but annoyingly enough he was pretty proud of this creation. “There,” Shizuo slammed the almost black drink down in front of Izaya. “The Flea.”

“Should I feel honoured? To have my own genuine beast of Ikebukuro creation.”

“I hope you choke.”

Shizuo found himself staring as the flea smirked over the rim of the martini glass. Amaro Arvena, an Italian liqueur, bitter and black, infused with herbs and with a slightly red tinge to it. It matched Izaya perfectly, brought out the crimson in those mischievous eyes. Shizuo watched, captivated, at the flash of pink as Izaya’s tongue poked out of his mouth just before he took a short sip.

Shizuo felt like his body was starting to warm, like pleasant fire burning low in his gut. He couldn’t help it, the way he watched Izaya like he was almost prey, eyes drawing to the pale expanse of his throat when he swallowed. The flea’s eyes were hooded and the way he licked his lips was downright sinful.

“Mmmm,” Izaya made a sound of approval, “not too bad, Shizu-chan.”

Fucking hell.

“You’re a goddamn pest,” Shizuo spoke into his drink. He was way too sober for this.

Izaya gave a shrug, a sly look on his face as he downed the entire glass in one go.

“Oi, you’re not supposed to skull it.”

“I’m catching up, you and Shinra had a head start after all,” Izaya placed the glass back down and slid it back over to Shizuo. “I’ll have an expresso martini next.”

“You’ll get whatever scraps I feel generous enough to give you, louse,” Shizuo growled, ideas for his next creation already coming to mind.

“Your customer service could do with some work.”

“Shizuo-kun!” Shinra arrived in a flourish, slamming down in the stool next to Izaya so violently that the flea was almost pushed off his own. “I need another drink!”

“Both of you are demanding fucks.”

Izaya gave Shinra a playful shove back, laughing as the doctor’s arma windmilled before grabbing the bar before him. Shizuo felt slightly winded at the carefree look on Izaya’s face. He doesn’t think he had ever heard him laugh like that before. Completely at-ease and genuine, with not a hint of deception.

Shizuo could watch him laugh like that forever.

Wait.

“Here,” Shizuo slammed a bottle of tequila and a shot glass down in front of Izaya. “Catch up.”

Izaya answered Shizuo’s challenging grin with one of his own.

“Shots, shots, sh-shots, shots!” Shinra started singing.

“You will actually die shitty doctor,” Shizuo snapped a warning, but he was ignored in favour of Shinra trying to follow the glass with his lips, as if he could get a sip in before Izaya. It was surprising, Shinra was so handsy with the flea, and the flea actually allowed it … Shizuo thought maybe with everything that had happened maybe the flea wouldn’t like being touched so casually, Shizuo knows he wouldn’t, and yet the flea doesn’t seem to have a care in the world.

It was kind of infuriating, that Shizuo was so messed up and Izaya wasn’t.

Fucking shitty flea.

Izaya held a hand on Shinra’s face and pushed him away, quickly downing the shot before he could steal it.

Shizuo was once again caught himself staring at the flea’s throat.

“Dammit Shinra, go paw at monster girlfriend,” Izaya said batting the doctor’s hands away.

“She went to bed,” Shinra lamented, an ugly pout on his face. “You two have to entertain me.”

“Shizu-chan could try juggling furniture for you, if you want,” Izaya said with a condescending smirk.

Feeling a little buzzed, Shizuo met the flea’s smirk with a cocky grin of his own.

Careful not to shoot anything through the ceiling, Shizuo swung the bottle of Midori backwards. It flipped up and over his shoulder, and Shizuo raised an elbow to meet it as it came back down. With a flick of his arm the base of the bottle bounced off and spun once again, before he snatched it from the air with his other hand.

“Woo, go Shizuo!” Shinra clapped as Shizuo flipped the bottle in his hand and went straight to the pour.

The flea had a sour look on his face, like he was trying with every part of his being to not be impressed, because that would be too disgusting to even contemplate for someone like Izaya.. “It’s like watching a dog walk on its hind legs.”

“C’mon Izaya, even you have to admit that was pretty good.”

“Yeah Izaya,” Shizuo mocked with his best flea imitation.

“What exactly is this? It looks toxic,” Izaya picked up his new drink, raising it to eye level as if to inspect the contents.

“It’s green!” Shinra shouted, sounding thoroughly amazed at the lime colour.

Shizuo ignored the two idiots, taking a sip of his own drink. A burst of sour apple exploded on his tongue, zingy and tingling.

“Wow this is so good!”

“It taste like pure sugar,” Izaya complained.

“It’s like a dance party in my mouth,” Shinra added, slurping at his drink happily. Shizuo had to agree with the doctor, Izaya was just an ungrateful bastard.

“Too much for you flea?” Shizuo laughed. “Maybe you should slow down if you can’t handle it.”

Izaya’s withering stare turned into wicked grin that made Shizuo’s blood sing. He answered by knocking the entire drink back in one go. “Who can’t handle what, Shizu-chan?”

Never one to back down from a challenge, Shizuo answered by downing his own drink.

“W-wait for me!”

“Shinra no!”

“Shinra yes!”

Shinra, in his eagerness to catch up, ended up choking which had Izaya laughing in that same laid-back way as before.

“Y-you,” Shinra choked out, “you guys are going to kill me.”

Izaya only held one arm around his waist as he laughed harder.

Cutecutecutecutecute.

“Oh there’s a cherry in here!”

Just a little surprise at the bottom of the glass. Shizuo had unfortunately swallowed his whole when he downed his drink earlier.  

Izaya took a look down into his glass, as if surprised to see his own cherry there too. “Heh.”

Izaya looked back up and Shizuo was pinned with eyes full of mischief.

Ohshit.

“Wanna see a trick, Shinra?”

“Ooh yes!”

“Watch this.”

Shizuo knew he would never be fucking prepared enough as Izaya gripped the cherry by the stem and lifted it to his mouth. He was facing Shinra on the barstool, but he kept his eyes locked on Shizuo.

Whose mouth was feeling incredibly dry.

Izaya lifted the cherry above his mouth, opening wide as he dropped the fruit in. Shizuo was hypnotised, and he couldn’t think past anything but mouth, lips, teeth, and tongue.

The louse gave a crooked closed-mouth smirk as he chewed, eyes closing in concentration and Shizuo followed the way he moved the cherry around in his mouth unblinking.

Shizuo couldn’t stop staring.

“Aaah.”

“Whoa!”

Shizuo almost passed out right then and there.

Izaya had swallowed visibly and then opened his mouth, a cherry stem tied into a perfect knot resting on his stuck out tongue. Shinra spoke up, his voice childlike and wonderous, nowhere near the level of depravity of Shizuo’s thoughts.

“Wow! You’re really good with your tongue, Izaya.”

The glass in his hands shattered, shards exploding outwards and showering over them all.

Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuuuuuuucccccckkkkkkkk.

Shinra jumped and fell off his chair, while Izaya absolutely howled with laughter. Shizuo could feel his cheeks heating up and he made sure to look anywhere but the flea. His hands reached for the broken glass, as if he could sweep this whole thing up along with the pieces.

“Ooowwweeeeelllllttttyyyyy~!”

Shinra’s groan of pain turned to delight at the appearance of the Dullahan. She was in pink pyjamas and cute fluffy bunny slippers. Celty fingers were flying as she typed on her PDA, holding it out for Shizuo, [What happened? Are you okay?]

“It’s fine, do you have a dustpan?”

Izaya cackled even harder and Shizuo answered by shoving him off his barstool. The flea landed next to Shinra, and they both took one look at each other before cracking up again.

Shitty, crappy, annoying, dam, flea.

Celty quickly helped Shizuo clean up the broken glass, both of them flat out ignoring the pair of drunkards rolling around on the floor.

“Sorry.”

Shizuo didn’t know if he was apologising for the broken glass or just the entire night in general. He might have gotten a little carried away, which he firmly blamed on Shinra’s bad influence. Also, Izaya’s shitty presence hadn’t exactly helped matters.

[It’s fine.]

[I’m glad you enjoyed yourself.]

Shizuo scrunched up his face. He didn’t know if would go as far as to say that … but the night hadn’t been a total letdown. It was hard to beat himself up too much about losing control when the alcohol had left him feeling warm and content.

Not to mention the heated look in the flea’s eyes.

Dammit, damn him. That shitty fucking flea was just too good at getting under Shizuo’s skin. Probably thought he had gotten away with the joke of the century on Shizuo. Shit, he had.

Whatever, Celty was an actual saint to put up with them all … especially Shinra, the lout.

“Celty my love~!” Shinra reached out with grabby hands as the Dullahan pulled him up and dumped him over his shoulder.

[Bed time.] Celty showed on her PDA, Shizuo merely raised his eyebrows in reply as the Dullahan turned and left.

“Kinky,” Izaya spoke over his shoulder.

“Ah!” Shizuo jumped, “don’t just pop up like that!”

Izaya snickered, moving back to the bar. He pulled himself up to sit on the benchtop, hands placed on either side of him so he could lean back suggestively. “Shinra is so getting pegged.”

Shizuo just groaned, rubbing between his eyes as if he could erase the images from his mind. He couldn’t help but notice the playlist had shuffled to a particularly sensual sounding song.

And now the flea has ruined The Weekend for me too…

“You’re disgusting.”

“Oh? You didn’t seem to think that before, far from it actually,” Shizuo looked over at the flea. Was he crazy or were his eyes screaming out ‘come here’?

Was the flea a mind reader? Could he tell Shizuo was thinking exactly about the way he could slot himself perfectly between parted legs with the pest sitting like that?

“F-,” Shizuo quickly cut himself off, no, don’t say fuck.

Izaya knew exactly what he’d been planning to say, if the devilish grin on his lips was anything to go by. The flea reached a hand for a small pot on the counter, whole body curving with the motion as he pulled out another maraschino cherry.

He’s a demon.

Shizuo quickly turned away, not wanting to watch Izaya put that damn thing in his mouth. Not seeing turning out to be even worse though, because now Shizuo was imagining all sorts of things.

Like taking that damn cherry out of the flea’s mouth with his own tongue.

Fuckingfuckfuuuuccck.

Shizuo was either too drunk or not drunk enough for the flea’s mind games. Either way, he was going not going to stick around to find out … and he definitely wasn’t going to fall for such a dirty trick just to have the louse laugh in his face.

“Im’ma bail,” Shizuo gave a half-hearted wave over his shoulder. “Stay out of ‘bukuro, flea.”

Shizuo had only just made it to the door when he was attacked.

Izaya grabbed him, swinging him around and slamming him up against the wooden frame. “Fl-,” Shizuo didn’t even get the words out, didn’t even get a chance to discern the flea’s expression before Izaya’s mouth was descending upon his.

Shizuo’s head was dizzy from the sudden movement, body struck dumb as Izaya twisted fingers into his hair.

What was happening? What the FUCK was happening!? Izaya was kissing him. Izaya was fucking kissing him. Shizuo. Shizuo who Izaya hated. Shizuo was being kissed by Izaya. The flea. What the actual fuck!?

Shizuo’s hands came up to Izaya’s shoulders, ready to push him away, “W-.”

He doesn’t even get the words out. Izaya taking advantage of his open mouth to shove his tongue inside.

He tastes like cherries.

All thoughts of confusion and protest vanish as instinct kicks in, and Shizuo can’t help the growl he lets out into the flea’s mouth. His arm moves down to Izaya’s waist, pulling him in flush against his body. The louse lets out an eager moan and he licks into Shizuo’s mouth in such a filthy way it makes Shizuo’s head spin. Shizuo grabs the back of his head, forcing him to turn so he can kiss back even deeper.

If Shizuo’s body had been hot before it was practically on fire now. Like his blood had turned to molten lava, coming to a boil in his gut before an eruption. Holding onto Izaya right now was like trying to hold onto a wild animal. He pulled Shizuo in by the collar of his shirt, and at the same pressed in even closer if that was possible, rubbing his body up against Shizuo’s with untamed fervour.

Shizuo groaned at the way Izaya’s hips slotted against his, the way their groins rubbed together. He moved a hand to Izaya’s ass, desperate to pull that friction closer to him, gripping so hard he was sure there would be bruises in the shape his fingerprints left behind.

“Fuck,” Shizuo’s forced to break the kiss, forced to come up for air. Izaya dives down to his neck, leaving a trail of fire behind as he licks and sucks at Shizuo’s skin. Shizuo’s mouth is parted as he gasps for breath, hand kneading at the taut muscle of Izaya’s ass. God, his fucking ass, it was perfect.

Izaya’s hands move from his neck to his chest, clawing at his clothes. He moves downwards, coming to the collar of Shizuo’s shirt. Shizuo’s not even able to take a breath before Izaya is ripping his vest and shirt open, the buttons flying off in several directions.

You-  

Shizuo didn’t have a chance to even get angry at the cocky smirk on Izaya’s face before the flea was diving in to lick and kiss at his chest, his hands roaming their way downwards to the top of Shizuo’s pants. Every point of contact searing.

Fuck.

Shizuo’s mind was catching up to his dick, coming to terms with what was actually happening right now. When Izaya’s tongue licked over his nipple, Shizuo quickly raised a fist to his mouth and bit down.

He could hear Izaya’s satisfied chuckle against his skin, mouth biting and sucking on the hardening nub. He swirled his tongue around the tip, and Shizuo couldn’t help but groan as his dick jumped in his pants, his mind conjuring the image of the tip of that tongue circling the head of his cock.

Shizuo was completely floored, Izaya’s entire mouth should be deemed illegal. Hell, he should be fucking arrested for crimes against decency and just-just fuck, that fucking tongue.

Shizuo could only pant into the fist in his mouth, hearting racing as he looked down at the top of Izaya’s head as he traced Shizuo’s abs with his tongue, slowly making his way downwards.

“Oh fuck.”

Izaya was on his knees, tugging Shizuo’s pants open roughly.

This couldn’t be reality. They were standing in Shinra and Celty’s living room for fuck sakes, and the flea was on his fucking knees, looking like a man starving.

“Fuck, Izaya.”

“Heh, I quite like this side of you Shizu-chan,” how the hell could Izaya still sound so dam smug as he nuzzled Shizuo’s clothed cock. “You’re making really cute noises.”

Shizuo whimpered as Izaya mouthed his erection through his underwear.

Fucking hell.

“Oh? You’re getting quite wet here,” Izaya pressed his fingers against a wet patch above the head of Shizuo’s dick.

“Fuck, Izaya!”

Izaya closed his eyes, as if savouring the pleading way Shizuo had said his name. “I could almost come hearing you sound like this.”

Illegal. That mouth should be illegal. The absolute filth that spewed from it. Shizuo felt his cock twitch, and if Izaya’s self-satisfied smirk was anything to go by, so had he.

I could almost come at the sight of you on your knees flea.

Shizuo’s hips jerked a little as Izaya pulled his underwear down, exposing his hard cock to the air.

“Easy beast,” Shizuo could feel Izaya’s breath brush over his cock, as the flea braced a forearm across Shizuo’s navel.

How the hell could Izaya make that stupid nickname sound so dam sexy? He said it like he was hungry, no, ravenous.

I wanna touch you too.

With a trembling hand, Shizuo ran fingers through black silky locks. Izaya was staring up at him with those hooded eyes from earlier, black-red amaro liqueur overtaking brown whiskey, just like the cocktail he had made him. Dark and bitter and hot.

He is stunning.

Without breaking eye contact, Izaya brushed his lips against the head of Shizuo’s cock in a chaste kiss.

Shizuo almost came right then and there.

“Fuck!”

Izaya laughed, the fucking tease. “That’s the idea, ne?”

And then Izaya swallowed his cock down almost down to the root, and Shizuo buckled at the waist, barely keeping on his feet. The moist heat that enveloped him was enough to drive him crazy, enough for him to want to grab Izaya by the head and fuck into that wet mouth with a ferocity only befitting a beast.

Izaya hummed, the noise a vibration against his cock. Shizuo’s hand was fisted in his hair, twisting so harshly it had to be painful, but the flea just looked back up at him with those eyes like dark Italian liqueur.  

“Y-you look so fucking good right now flea, with my cock in your mouth.” Shizuo’s is surprised the words come out, his voice low and filthy.

Izaya moans at that, palming his at his own cock over his pants at Shizuo’s words. Shizuo can’t help the way his hips buck at the sight, but Izaya’s arm holds him down.

Slick velvet heat moves up his shaft, Izaya tonguing at the slit before releasing Shizuo’s cock with a harsh suck to the head. “If you can still talk I must be doing something wrong.”

Shizuo brain was meanwhile leaking out of his ears from Izaya’s rough treatment. Izaya shoots him a wicked grin, a devilish turn of his lips that promises sweet, hot things to come.

The flea dives back down, Shizuo’s mouth parted and panting, unable to stop the moans as Izaya’s head bobs up and down.

His head jerking.

Wait, no.

Lifeless eyes.

Stop.

Rutting, grunting. The revolting sound of pleasure as a dark stain bloomed outwards.

No, no, no.

He can no longer see, thrown back into that hellish day. Shizuo is standing in the doorway, body frozen as Izaya’s lifeless eyes stare out at him. The body atop of his is grunting with its brutal onslaught, Izaya’s head forced to bob with each violent thrust, and Shizuo can’t move, can’t do anything but watch.

Watch as someone fucks Izaya’s dead body.

“What the fuck Shizuo!?”

Shizuo lashes out, against the horror of it all, throwing Izaya away from him with violent strength and fear. He can’t hear the sound Izaya’s body makes as it hits the floor, the huff of air that is forced from the flea’s lungs as he is winded by the force, it doesn’t piece through flashes of memory, through a mind trapped by terror, because all he can hear is the sound of groaning sick pleasure.

Shizuo hunches over, trying to put his softening dick back into his pants with shaking hands. His breathing is coming out in harsh gasps, and a small part of his mind thinks he might actually pass out from lack of oxygen. But none of that matters, all that matters is he has to get out, has to get away.

Izaya moves from where he had landed painfully on the floor, hands reaching out for Shizuo.

“Don’t fucking touch me!”

Izaya flinches back, Shizuo’s voice ripping from him like a physical blow.

“Shizu-chan...”

Shizuo can’t fucking breathe.

“Don't, just don’t.”

Get out, just fucking get out of there.

His mind was far away, still trapped in that apartment, that day, fear pushing his body forward.  

In a flash he was out the door and running, leaving Izaya on the floor wide-eyed and stunned, wondering what the hell had just happened.

[lavenderboneswrites]

Scratch that ... RIP shizuo

me writing Shizaya for whumptober: RIP Izaya

[lavenderboneswrites]

me writing Shizaya for whumptober: RIP Izaya

[lavenderboneswrites]

Morning reblog ^_^

Chapters: 1/6 Fandom: Durarara!! Rating: Explicit Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con Relationships: Heiwajima Shizuo/Orihara Izaya, Kishitani Shinra/Celty Sturluson Characters: Heiwajima Shizuo, Orihara Izaya, Kishitani Shinra, Celty Sturluson Summary:

Shizuo witnesses an incredible act of violence against his most hated enemy. Left to pick up the pieces, he finds himself experiencing unwanted side-effects, all while forced to deal with the very person he claims to hate.