#ship: rowacey

[suzysgossip]

EXPOSING ACUP: DON’T TRUST AN EVANS

Hey there, Pepperinos, and welcome back to my channel. Today, we’re going to talk about a story that is currently breaking, and a story that I’ve been sitting on for literal months, just waiting for the perfect moment to make like your mom and fuck it up.

Now, you could ask me how I know this is finally in the works, but one look at Stacey’s ask answer on how she and Mae are no longer friends, as well as Mae’s current stream of wannabe emo girl posts, one could say that this cat’s out of the lesbian bag. And ladies, I’m your regular Suzy Claws here to give all of you on the naughty list a set of tea.

1. THE TIMELINE

Stevie and Mae have been hooking up for two months.

But Suzy, you’re saying, how is this possible? You spelled Stacey’s name wrong! No, I didn’t. You heard it here folks: Stevie and Mae have been sleeping together. One of my spies caught them at a party all the way back in December, not even two weeks after Stacey and Mae broke up.

I’m a little murky on some of the details. I don’t know when exactly this turned into more, but a look into Mae’s Meme Monday answers about who she’s currently sleeping with and the kinds of things she’s into all line up with several other answers Stevie has given. These two really tried to keep it on the fly, I’ll give them that, but now that you know what to look for, go back and read their posts and see just how obvious it was.

Do I have details about this sordid affair? No, no I don’t. Contrary to popular belief, I don’t have cameras inside your apartments. If I want my revenge porn, I have to be more creative about getting it. Now, obviously, I can’t prove to you that this affair has lasted for this entire length of time, because truthfully, I’m not fully aware of it myself. But considering how today’s events went down, well...

Sources say that Stacey and Rowan were spotted entering Mae’s apartment building today. Shortly after, Stevie was spotted leaving the apartment. To which, Stevie then left the apartment after a few minutes, as did Stacey and Rowan, together.

What was this pow wow about? My thoughts are: Why was Rowan there? She’s not relevant.

EDIT: I went ahead and checked back with my sources and they reminded me that Stacey and Rowan are a thing but pretending nobody knows about them, despite disappearing from Nicola’s Oscar party together for half an hour and going on a date at Ellen’s Stardust Diner, of all places, before seeing The Prom. 

Oh wait. Aren’t Mae and Rowan supposed to be best friends? What would I give to crash next Tuesday’s Warblette rehearsal...

2. THE EVANS TRIAGE

Lady, oh lady, I would not want to be Mama Evans right now. Can you imagine having your three daughters feuding like this? 

Now, I’m sure some of you could have called this one. It’s not totally out of the question for an Evans to completely stab someone they love in the back all in the name of sex that’s the equivalent to pizza from Kentucky, but did we think that an Evans would do this to her own sister?

God, Stevie. Considering how often you claim that you don’t want to be like Sam, you sure did a great job of emulating her drama, didn’t you?

Now, here’s what I want to know. Did Sam know about this? You’d think that after that situation blew up in her face, she would have learned her lesson and encouraged Stevie to, you know, not fuck over her own sister? But on the other hand, I don’t think Sam’s all that perceptive enough to pick up on anything...

So we’ve got three instances of an Evans girl screwing over someone very important to them all in the sake of sex. And here’s where you all can ask yourselves, why are we enabling this kind of behavior and allowing them to treat people this way? 

Sam -> Kate, aka her ex best friend Blair’s ex, but that’s old news.

Stacey -> Rowan, aka her ex Mae’s best friend

Stevie -> Mae, aka her sister’s ex

Gals, come on. Don’t be this gullible. Do not trust an Evans.

3. NO YOU MAE NOT

Did I not call this? Did I not tell you all so far ahead of time that Mae is a shady bitch? I don’t believe this innocent act for three seconds. Mae is so all over the place, I can’t tell which of her personalities is coming out today. 

Fact check: Mae only has one personality, and it’s a shitty one. The kind of personality that says, hey, I’m going to have absolutely no regard for anyone’s feelings other than my own, and not only destroy a family, but try and hide it from the people involved so as not to tarnish my crystal clear reputation.

This is what’s happening to Mae’s reputation.

4. SLEEPING WITH YOUR EX’S SISTER/SISTER’S EX IS WRONG

I just wanted to state that as obvious, since some of you idiots are actually going to try and defend Stevie and Mae’s behavior. Just in case you consider making that heinous choice in ethics, do us all a favor and don’t. I’d love to see how they try and worm their way out of this one-- it was one time! We didn’t know what we were doing! I liked Stevie before I ever liked Stacey! I liked Mae before Stacey did! We were going to end it! We were going to tell her! Many of these excuses will come up in numerous ways in the upcoming days: don’t believe a word of it. They both should know they fucked up and now they have to suffer the consequences.

Although, I don’t truly know if Stevie thinks that what she’s done is wrong, because she has the moral compass of a teaspoon. Talking to her about it will be like how talking to Stevie always is: hurling yourself at a brick wall.

There are the facts, ma’ams and misses. Go forth and drag.

Happy March, ladies. The madness has only just begun.

@streetsmartstevie @yesyesyoumae @itsstaceyevans @rrrrowan @samerystargaryen​

[suzysgossip]

Stacey's totally using Rowan as a rebound after getting dumped by Mae

Wow, let’s hope Rowan isn’t entertaining this. Isn’t there supposed to be some kind of girl code about not dating your friend’s ex? Let alone, your teammate’s ex? 

On the one hand, this might be a great time to switch to stanning Rachel and the Exes if you’re on team Bird Nerds currently.

On the other hand… These Evans girls have absolutely no respect for girl code, am I right? See @beeanders and @samerystargaryen if you want more details on that one. 

@itsstaceyevans @rrrrowan @yesyesyoumae

[suzysgossip]

what's the current tea on rowan and stacey?

Who knows. They’re super quiet about being involved with each other other than a few Instagram comments here and there. You keep sending me in gossip about this, so I’m guessing it’s still something relevant. If that’s the case, I’d love to be a fly on the wall at tomorrow night’s Warblette rehearsal, especially with Valentine’s Day on the horizon.