#shinanai

[grict]

lean. from mimiko and nanako, one against each shoulder ☺️

It's not hard to imagine what the two sisters went through.

Miguel himself had been ostracized from 'modern' society, ironically mostly those that had mass-converted to a religion that preached love and acceptance. His mother was called everything under the sun: Liar, swindler, whore. His father became more respected since he had the 'decency' to die fighting for civil rights overseas, as though social activism circles weren't ever toxic or too focused on in-fighting against other people of color in regards to who has suffered the most indignities.

He could remember the hot sun against his back, the taste of dirt and dust. Having the wind knocked from his lungs as another teenager's shoe drove itself into his gut and bare fists rained down on his scalp. The defacement, the scorn, harmful gossip poisoning a community that once was unified against colonialism- Now bent at the knee for what? A paltry sense of moral superiority? Salvation?

As much as he and his family were hated, when it came to curses, even the most vitriolic of nay-sayers would suddenly ask for aid. As though years of thrown rocks and other abuses could be forgotten.

But they exorcised the curses. Not for acceptance nor gratitude, but because it was the obvious solution. When a curse is plaguing a household, you do not leave them to their own devices due to revenge or perception of justice served.

But he still held onto that- The hate. It grew and it festered and boiled over until even the suggestion of ridding the world of non-sorcerers began to sound sane. The concept went down sweet like honey and a pleasant warmth began to spread where a roiling knot of complicated emotions once haunted his core.

He'd never been left wanting for family. Not blood relatives, anyway. But this thing he had with Suguru's group had changed over time. A sense of closeness and the illusion of closeness. Of trust. As if Geto was prepared to capitulate to every condition that Adisa presented in order to beckon him into his fold.

These two, though... They had never once been touched by a kind hand in childhood. Every child deserved unconditional love, no matter what the circumstance. A chance to make mistakes and learn and not be weighed down by the world's sins every waking second.

He gave in to every demand, anything their hearts desired. But one could never call them 'spoiled' nor 'undeserving' of all the little joys that life had to offer.

Perhaps it was for them, not merely himself, that he'd stayed.

[tsubasadan]

😇

" uhhmm -- please don't? "

[powies]

46﹕ sender  pulls  receiver  out  of  harm’s  way . (spas!marco @ beretta)

𝟏𝟎𝟎 𝑵𝑶𝑵𝑽𝑬𝑹𝑩𝑨𝑳 𝑷𝑹𝑶𝑴𝑷𝑻𝑺 / 𝐀𝐂𝐂𝐄𝐏𝐓𝐈𝐍𝐆

thin fingers curl around stiff handle of the whip, and they pull. and pull. and they pull again. the feel of braided leather bites at the skin of her palm and beretta minds it not- no. she prefers it. enjoys it. weight hangs heavy on the other side but hunter stays grounded on building's edge; chin tilts and ankles are crossed- dainty and with some leisure, she is a lady after all.

softly, she hums; it's a sweet tune she'd heard some time ago in this god forsaken cesspool of a city. a pleasant song, one that mixes and mingles with the bustle of the streets beneath her — every word, every every scream, every guttural and wrenched cry that come from down below.

whip bows again, tagged scum continues to struggle against barbs buried deep into it's neck. tag's feet dangles only inches from the ground but finds no reprieve, can't. raw fingers scratch and pull at her weapon, it cries out for help but all that escapes are strangled wailing, drowned out by own blood and teeth and tongue. what a sweet tune indeed, she thinks. despaired cries tinging pink to the apples of her cheeks.

it's no use, silly rat : once in beretta's grip, there's never more a chance to escape.

hunter's lips curl back into a smile and she flicks her wrist, whip's spine only coils tighter and tighter, tighter again! A SNAP. body at the end of her weapon falls limp and comes untangled from barbed thong and onto the ground with a thud. a pity it didn't last long, playthings always too quick to break.

gaze sweeps the alleyway below, it seems minimi and maverick are making quick work emptying the buildings and garages. no matter the nook or cranny, the hunter will always find the prey. tagged monsters run and hide and run some more — pathetic little things will never be fast enough. there's a swell of what feels like pride that blooms in beretta's chest as she watches the fellow destroyers carry out their mission with a swiftness.

feeling doesn't last long, however.

❝  HKK — !  ❞ there's a lapse in sense in which beretta suddenly sees upside down. comfort of concrete is no longer under her and she's quick to act — tucking head beneath body with legs folded to make safe landing on the back of the corpse previously dropped. so sweet of it to break her fall~

beretta looks up, the sun is especially bright today and yet. something wet hits her face- rain? no, couldn't be that . . . hand opposite to the one cradling weapon raises to block out beams above her and she squints. another body ( parts of it, anyway ) hangs right over the edge she'd previously sat. knife falls to her feet and laughter rumbles from her depths. above dead tagged was her peer, looking back down to her. so serious. so bloody.

definitely not rain, indeed.

fellow hunter offers a large wave of her arm and she's grinning again, voice firm but still so soft as she calls to him.

❝  oh, spazzy wazzy, you saved me! my knight in shining wire!  ❞

[kyousei-a]

     ❝ Pitou. ❞

[houkusu]

@shinanai​​ asked: you’re one t’talk about being troublesome🐰

" now what is that supposed to mean?    i'm practically harmless!    simply a cardinal, minding my own business. "

[deathleadsarc]

@shinanai sent a letter: ❛ you have blood on your hands. ❜ (from nai)

&. 𝐝𝐚𝐫𝐤 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐬𝐭𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐬. | accepting

―  🜛  ―  how calmly he speaks when gazing upon that masquerading human in mid-prance, her arms extended as if conducting an orchestra  ( crescendo of that performance reaching its highest peak, applause splattering the dusty ground with vermillion vibrancy ) and amused as she was, she wished to continue testing both his and her limitations. A turn of the heel and now the two were eye to eye, smiling all the while, arms outstretched as if to welcome him to enjoy her song! 

    " Indeed! "    laughter as a songbird comes bubbling forth her smiling lips, swaying on the spot with absolute delight.    " Would you like to dance, or does this frighten you? Won't bite, I promise! Though, if you can't dance, I dare say you may trip over the bloody ol dancefloor of mud I've gone and made! "

    " Dear me ― what a lovely, shiny little MESS it is, isn't it? "

[sociieties]

@shinanai: “ …i was really worried about you, you know. you scared me earlier. and i’m not saying it to make you feel bad, it’s just… promise me you’ll tell me if things get bad again? ” aki @ angel

the first response is silence / it sits on his shoulders bearing little weight, stringy and annoying as it coils around angel's throat and chokes the life out of him. to be told that it's not to make him feel bad doesn't help too much of anything, but angel has yet to move from his near petrified state in over twenty minutes. currently, he still sit in aki's bathtub and it's half water, half blood. head stays down, messy, still bloody stands of ginger hair only further cling to wet cheeks. " mmm... " the response is weak, but it's better than nothing. it does nothing for the guilt — thought of a promise being broken ( it's not a contract, yet the idea of actually breaking it seems impossible all the same ), even now it leaves angel in this pathetic state. " sorry, " angel manages, disoriented voice echoing off of the walls before bouncing back to himself. sorry, but he doesn't promise. " it was for you; it's too soon. "

[yurirot]

panel redraw from Ojiichan Shinanai but with them 😊

[cravingmoremangacaps]

[nero-draco]

[tsubasadan]

bites u.

squeaky toy sounds.

[houkusu]

@shinanai​​​ asked: ❝ all of the things that you think and then think about thinking… i know it’s hard, but they’re not who you are. they’re white noise. ❞ rumi 【 in case i make it. 】

----         white noise.

                       「 was that easy for her to say? 」

( of course not, rumi's no better off than him. )

staring at the ceiling of the hospital bed, bandaged frame and gauze-braced throat ; the true extent of the damage hadn't been realized until later. many were lost in that fight, but as far as sustained injuries went, the numbers on the hero's side were beginning to look less like a scoreboard and more like statistics.                              ( perhaps what he'd meant was,                            ' have you seen this a lot? ' )

though, not in this way. a version of reality so physically apparent that wings gone could only feel lucky in comparison to the lives lost - to those hurt even worse - to her. without his wings, hawks may as well be utterly useless. it's damn near impressive, for someone so well trained in covert action. of course, he only knew his feathers could burn from previous experience, but this level of damage was inconceivable ; multiple times recovery girl visited, attempted to heal the wounds.                           ----       and multiple times, he was told such a thing couldn't be fully reversed, that he was lucky to be alive, lucky tokoyami came in time, lucky, lucky.

『 you should be counting your stars that     anything's left to heal, 』 she'd said, shaking her head while trading charts with an attending nurse --  『 if your feathers didn't naturally re-grow on their own,     this wouldn't have worked as well as it did.     i can't do more than this. 』

flat gold flickers to rumi, watching her for a short time, then back ahead. on television, the news continues to report on an emergency broadcast across the city. distantly, the sound of sirens echo, both as a warning to leave and from first responders alike.

her condition is so much worse than hawks' it's laughable to think he feels anything at all.

                                                     「 i really am pathetic. 」

『 they're white noise. 』

in his head, she'd said it like it was simple and fluid, as if hours hadn't passed in silence from the moment he'd opened his eyes. he imagined it quick and peppy and with confidence, a hand clapped against his shoulder with her trademarked smile. it was boisterous, mirthful. she'd laughed with the phrase.                                     ( there are multiple reasons why                                       there was no such thing ) their ideas of heroism had always been somewhat similar, crossing at points then straying away, but a lot more of that was out in the open now, wasn't it? not in an entirely truthful way - the moment he was up and able to speak, a statement would be necessary -                                     ( upon first blink, he'd been bombarded                                       with information ) and while this particular event was altered in such a way to paint the very worst -- the overarching concept was not a lie.

thankfully, the press were not allowed to so much as step into the lobby, but even the nurses whispered at his bedside.

『 a murderer... like a villain?     but he seems so nice! it can't be real, can it?     endeavor i'd believe, but...! 』

upon rousing, it was one of the first things he'd seen. a re-run, presumably -- news tickers were strolling across the bottom of the screen, bright red, detailing damage, death tolls, injuries. which cities were to evacuate next.                                ( it was the sound of his voice that did it ) at first, hawks had felt shock. ----                   then, remorse. he wondered if he still had the ability to feel rage, or if it even had a purpose, a justified place within his chest.

was rumi here to find that out for herself?

                          「 the morphine will kick in again soon, right? 」

in his left hand, his phone, transponder app open. clearly a struggle with the way his arm lifts, stiff, thumb swiping slowly against the words ;                                     ( but at least they get out at all. )

    【 𝚒𝚝'𝚜 𝚝𝚛𝚞𝚎, 𝚛𝚞𝚖𝚒. 】

followed by a pause, another long struggle, and then -

    【 𝚝𝚑𝚎𝚜𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚘𝚞𝚐𝚑𝚝𝚜 -- 】

he feels dizzy, eyes straining against the screen. there's an odd sensation, a soft noise clawing out of his throat ; attempts to speak resulting in absolutely nothing. ----            dammit, dammit, DAMMIT.                                ( one last movement, just one.                                   if she leaves, she leaves. )

    【 𝚒𝚝'𝚜 𝚠𝚑𝚘 𝚒'𝚟𝚎 𝚊𝚕𝚠𝚊𝚢𝚜 𝚋𝚎𝚎𝚗. 】

and just like that, as long as she could parse it together -- someone knows the truth. the first person, maybe even the last. a statement he may give for public's sake, but she, she -- at least, of anyone, rumi would know without a doubt in her mind. would never have to think. would never have to wonder.

                                    「 yeah. like a villain. 」

[somedogs]

イキグサレ 「お注射ガール」 Translation Ikigusare - "Injection Girl" (Ochuusha Gaaru)

"Injection Girl" by Ikigusare, the horror-themed virtual idol group recently making the sweeps. Original lyrics, romaji transcription and my own translation.

Where to find the song:

NicoNicoDouga YouTube Bandcamp

!! Warnings !!

Medical violence, needles, poisoning, abusive love, general horror themes, suicide.

Usage:

Please don't repost or use my translation without permission and credit. I'm happy for this to be used for subs and videos, as long as I'm notified and credited.

If you use the romaji (for covers, reference, etc.), I would also appreciate credit, but it's optional.

Please enjoy.

Original (from Bandcamp)

あら目が覚めたの　まだボンヤリするでしょ 貴方のお茶に少し薬入れたの 寝てる間にイスに縛り付けたよ 何でこんなことするんだって言いたいの？ 私が何も知らないと思ってたの　ホントバカね

この注射器には毒が入っています 即死する毒なんて入手できないから 結構長い時間苦しむと思うけど 結局死ぬんだからどうでもいいでしょ 少しだけチクッとするよ　動くと余計痛いよ

��んちゃって全部嘘だよ　貴方は死なないよ 一時でも愛した人を　殺すわけ無いじゃない 大丈夫　全部嘘だよ　これは毒じゃないよ でもこれで少しは私の怒りが分かった？

これで貴方への復讐は終わり でもまだロープは解いてあげない 後は私の個人的なことだけど もうちょっとだけ付き合ってください 貴方に騙されちゃった　自分がもう許せない

この注射器には本当に毒が入ってる 今からこれを自分に打ちます のた打ち回って　もがき苦しんで 動かなくなるまで　どうか見ててね 貴方が裏切った女の最後見届けて

ほら見てよ　血反吐吐いたよ　手足痙攣するよ 喉を掻き毟って　もうそこら中血まみれ ほら見てよ　凄い顔でしょ　まるで地獄みたいでしょ でもなんか今の私　ちょっとだけセクシー

Romaji

ara me ga sameta no　mada bon'yari suru desho anata no ocha ni sukoshi kusuri deta no neteiru aida ni isu ni shibari tsuketa yo nande konna koto suru nda tte iitai no? watashi ga nani mo shiranai to omotteta no　honto baka ne

kono chuushaki ni wa doku ga haiteimasu sokushi suru doku nante nyuushu dekinai kara kekkou nagai jikan kurushimu to omou kedo kekkyoku shinu ndakara dou demo ii desho sukoshi dake chikutto suru yo　ugoku to yokei itai yo

nanchatte zenbu uso da yo　anata wa shinanai yo ittoki de mo aishita hito wo　korosu wake nai janai daijoubu　zenbu uso da yo　kore wa doku janai yo demo kore de sukoshi wa watashi no ikari ga wakatta?

kore de anata e no fukushuu wa owari demo mada roopu wa toite agenai ato wa watashi no kojinteki na koto dakedo mou chotto dake tsukiatte kudasai anata ni damasarechatta　jibun ga mou yurusenai

kono chuushaki ni wa hontou ni doku ga haiteru ima kara kore wo jibun ni uchimasu notauchi mawatte　mogaki kurushinde ugokanaku naru made　douka mitete ne anata ga uragitta onna no saigo todokete

hora mite yo　chihedo haita yo　teashi keiren suru yo nodo wo kakimushitte　mou sokorajuu chimamire hora mite yo 　sugoi kao desho　marude jigoku mitai desho demo nanka ima no watashi　chotto dake sekushii (x2)

Translation

Ah, you've woken up! Seems you're still out of it I spiked your tea with a bit of poison While you slept, I tied you to a chair You want to ask why I'd do such a thing? You thought I didn't know anything, just a real fool, huh?

I've filled this syringe here with poison I couldn't get hold of poison that kills quickly, so I think you'll suffer for a splendidly long time But you'll die in the end anyways, so it doesn't matter. Nothing but a quick prick - move and it'll hurt more!

🎜🎜🎜🎜🎜

Just kidding! That was all a lie, you're not gonna die! There's no reason to kill someone even if I only loved them for a time. It's okay, that was all a lie, this isn't poison! Still, just now, did you understand at least some of my anger?

With this, my revenge on you is over But I won't untie the ropes just yet. The rest is just a personal matter, but Please keep me company a little while longer. You managed to trick me; I can't let you do it ever again. I've filled this syringe here with poison for real This time, I'll inject myself with it. Rolling around in pain, writhing in agony, Until I stop moving. Please watch, okay? The final moments of the woman you betrayed - watch till the end.

🎜🎜🎜🎜🎜🎜🎜🎜

Hey, look here! I've thrown up blood! My limbs are convulsing! Scratching at my throat, there's already blood everywhere. Hey, look here! Such a terrible, amazing face, almost just like hell. But even now, when I'm like this, I'm just a bit sexy~ (x2)

[sociieties]

he's being threatened. being picked apart and he does not like it. he's only reminded of how she only ever does this to him, never offers anything of substance but pulls and pulls at his nerves with tiny words that should mean nothing, but makima's better at controlling people ( humans / devils ) than she's given credit for. he will not respond in a way that shows just how deeply her words have seeped into his flesh. she is so strange, this woman. " i don't know... " it's the honest truth, said with his usual dragging of afterthought, as if there's something weighing heavy on his tongue. his relationship with his partner / he finds it extremely complicated and entirely simple, something far more convoluted than things like enjoying and satisfaction. angel, however, feels no need to divulge any more than that. he actively chooses to leave it at that, gaze shifting from woman to desk, lazily eyeing papers he couldn't bother reading. why does she choose to ask him about aki now? she's never asked him of previous partners. / @shinanai, continued.

[utapri-translations-uuuu]

Ikkiuchi - Lyrics + Translation (一騎打ち)

English title: One-on-one combat / Duel

Translator's notes can be found at the end and are marked with an asterisk.

Please do not repost/retranslate without permission.

Kanji:

【Re】 ヨーホー！　ヨーホー！

誰もが恐れおののく　俺は海賊

このフックが調理してやろう

コックのように　フルコース

味わわせてみせよう　華麗な技を

【Ce】 イーハー！　イーハー！

誰よりも誇り高き　ボクは戦士

このタイガー・リリーが戦いの喜びを教えてあげる

戦場を制するルーラー(支配者)

戦いのルールはボクさ

【Re】 笑わせるな

お前はルーザー　俺はクローザー

お前の命を終わらせる者

【Ce】 生きるか死ぬか　覚悟はできたか？

命が短いのはどちらの方？

【Re】 生意気な若造　世間を知らない

口先ばかりで　恐怖も知らない

【Ce】 何を生き急ぐ？　驕り高ぶる大人よ

どうせ死にゆく定めなのに

【Re】 死なない人間などいない

時は誰しも平等で残酷なのさ

【Ce】 だからこそ譲れない

この身を賭した一撃は

【Re】 「やるな……」

【Ce】 「そちらこそ！」

【Re】 「さぁ、決着をつけよう！」

【Ce】 「望むところだ！」

【Re】 知らないがゆえに　壇上を舞う強さ

【Ce】 知っているゆえの　盤上の駆け引き

【Re・Ce】 讃えよ

重ね合う剣

【Re】花を散らして

【Ce】花を散らして

【Re・Ce】 海の藻屑となるがいい

Rōmaji:

【Re】 Yōhō! Yōhō!

Daremo ga osore ononoku ore wa kaizoku

Kono fukku ga chōri shite yarou

Kokku no yō ni furukōsu

Ajiwawa sete miseyou karei na waza o

【Ce】 Īhā! Īhā!

Dare yori mo hokori takaki boku wa senshi

Kono Taigā Rirī ga tatakai no yorokobi o oshieteageru

Senjō o seisuru rūrā

Tatakai no rūru wa boku sa

【Re】 Warawaseru na

Omae wa rūzā ore wa kurōzā

Omae no inochi o owaraseru mono

【Ce】 Ikiru ka shinu ka kakugo wa dekita ka?

Inochi ga mijikai no wa dochira no hou?

【Re】 Namaiki na wakazō seken o shiranai

Kuchisaki bakari de kyōfu mo shiranai

【Ce】 Nani o iki isogu? Ogori takaburu otona yo

Dōse shini yuku sadame na noni

【Re】 Shinanai ningen nado inai

Toki wa dare shimo byōdō de zankoku na no sa

【Ce】 Dakara koso yuzurenai

Kono mi o toshita ichigeki wa

【Re】 “Yaru na……”

【Ce】 “Sochira koso!”

【Re】 “Sā, ketchaku o tsukeyou!”

【Ce】 “Nozomu tokoro da!”

【Re】 Shiranai ga yue ni danjō o mau tsuyo-sa

【Ce】 Shitte iru yue no banjō no kakehiki

【Re・Ce】 Tataeyo kasaneau tsurugi

【Re】 Hana o chirashite

【Ce】 Hana o chirashite

【Re・Ce】 Umi no mokuzutonaru ga ī

Translation:

【Re】 Yo-ho! Yo-ho!　

I am a pirate that makes everyone shake from fear

With this hook of mine, I’ll cook

A full course like a chef

I’ll give you a taste of my brilliant technique

【Ce】 Yee-ha! Yee-ha!

I am a warrior, prouder than anyone else

This Tiger Lily will teach you the joys of battle

I am the ruler who controls the battlefield,

The one who makes the rules of the battle is me

【Re】 Don’t make me laugh

You’re the loser, I am the closer*

Who will end your life

【Ce】 Are you ready to live or die?

Which of us shall have the shorter life?

【Re】 You’re an impertinent young lad, ignorant of the ways of the world

You’re all talk and no bite, and you don’t know terror

【Ce】 What’s the hurry? You’re an arrogant adult

Even though you’re doomed to die anyway

【Re】 There’s no such thing as a human who will never die

Time is equal and cruel to all

【Ce】 That’s why I won’t give up

The single blow I’m risking my life for

【Re】 “Not bad…”

【Ce】 “I could say the same.”

【Re】 “Now, let’s settle this!”

【Ce】 “That’s what I want!”

【Re】 The strength to dance on the stage because of ignorance

【Ce】 The ability to use tactics on the board because you know them

【Re・Ce】 Praise be

To the overlapping swords

【Re】 Let us fight fiercely

【Ce】 Let us fight fiercely

【Re・Ce】 Until one of us dies at sea

Translator's notes:

(クローザー) Closer- “In baseball, a closing pitcher, more frequently referred to as a closer, is a relief pitcher who specializes in getting the final outs in a close game when his team is leading.” [Wikipedia]

[cravingmoremangacaps]