#shell never get the same love for her beauty that a femme would

[mvmnbnv]

It's so wild to me how they gave vi such beautiful features but we'll probably never hear them be praised on screen bc only femmes are allowed to be admired for being beautiful

Like they really gave her such big pretty eyes, gorgeous heartshaped lips, long lashes, a soft heart shaped face, a pretty voice and I doubt it'll ever be addressed.

Exactly why I'll continue to talk about how beautiful and special she is to me.

[highqueenofelfhame]

feel the fire, part one

She used to look like the sun, used to radiate the same bright and free energy like wildfire. Rowan had never seen anything like her before, the way she seemed to buzz with such fervor. He had never seen her use her magic in his bar so he wasn’t sure what type of magic she had, but he could feel it radiating off of her like static electricity. Something changed, though, and he wasn’t sure what had happened. He just knew that now she was what they called faded. 

Her magic was leeching the life out of her because for one reason or another, she wasn’t using it anymore. 

Before, Aelin Galathynius had gone from the sun personified, her golden hair lustrous as it tumbled down her back. It looked like it was threaded with strands of actual gold, catching in the light in such ways Rowan had never really seen before. Not so vibrantly, anyway. Everything about her glowed from within, her skin, hair, her eyes that sometimes looked like they had a core of flame. 

But then she started fading, and if Rowan didn’t know any better, it was because of the bastard she’d started dating. He knew the man was a tool based on his reaction any time Rowan used his magic around him. The look on his face had told him enough of what he thought about magic and he hated that Aelin might not be using hers, whatever it may be. Her skin had lost it’s glow, her hair didn’t catch the light anymore. In truth, she looked completely exhausted. Not using her magic was, quite frankly, ruining the very essence of what she used to be. 

These days, she spent a lot of time at the bar alone. Even now, she was pretty much watching the ice melt in the drink he’d made her. Rowan had been using his own magic to freeze it again, something he did for all patrons of the bar to keep their drinks cold. For her, though, he figured it was therapeutic somehow to let the ice melt all the way before he froze the water in the alcohol back into cubes. Sometimes, he froze them into different shapes, doing anything to try to get so much as a grin out of her.

 It hadn’t worked. 

Above the bar, the blue neon light flicked against her wan skin, making her look nearly translucent. Sickly, even. He hadn’t thought anything could make her look worse but that light did, casting an odd sheen and shadow over her features. It was tempting to turn it off entirely just so he didn’t have to see her bathed in its glow. 

Rowan didn’t understand. He didn’t understand why she would stay with a man like that in the first place, but more so he didn’t understand how someone could take the obvious sunshine she’d been before and frozen her into a shell of herself. He didn’t understand how a man could take a look at the way she was before and whittle her down to nothing. Didn’t understand how it wouldn’t drive her boyfriend absolutely insane to tame what she had been when before, she’d been so beautiful it was almost painful to look at her. He was stealing her from herself. It made Rowan want to punch him on the off days he saw him around. 

“Want another?” He asked, nodding his head toward the nearly empty glass of whiskey in her hands. His own worked to towel dry a glass that he flipped over his shoulder when she nodded her head yes. Her skin had an odd sheen of sweat over it, likely from her magic wanting out, out, out, so Rowan sent a cool breeze in her direction until he saw some sort of relief flicker across her features.

He didn’t miss the way her lips parted like it felt so good she wanted to gasp or maybe even moan. 

Rowan was slow in filling her drink. It was a Tuesday and there weren’t many other patrons left in the bar this late but him. 

“You look like you’ve seen better days,” he finally admitted, leaning on his forearms while she took another drink. This time, the breeze was almost too-cold and she shot him a look that told him to knock it off. Good, he thought. Bite back, throw something at me. 

“Is it your business?” She drawled, drumming her thumb on the counter. Rowan shrugged, licked his lips, and sent another sharp breeze at her. This time, he sent small flecks of ice. “Stop doing that.”

“You need to let it out, you know. Or you’ll just keep getting worse.” 

She had answered by throwing a twenty on the bar and leaving without another word. 

Each time he saw her after that, she looked progressively worse. Like she wasn’t sleeping at all, like she was sick. It was starting to eat him alive the same way her magic was eating her alive. 

Rowan would be lying if he said that he wasn’t somewhat infatuated with her. He was pretty sure he was in love with her, actually, but he’d never told anyone that. They were friends the way you were friends with your bartender. The way he knew secrets about just about everyone who spilled drunken secrets to him. Rowan could have run his entire establishment on the trade of secrets, but that wouldn’t pay the bills.

Aelin had been different from everyone he’d ever met. The first time he’d seen her walk into his bar the first thing he’d done after closing was run upstairs to sketch her because he’d wanted to capture her and everything that she was before it faded from his memory. It never had faded away though. She was in every weekend with her friends giving him hell. 

The night Rowan had finally worked up the courage to ask her out, she had walked in with another man and after one kiss on the lips he’d figured his chances were shot to hell. 

Now he made an effort to annoy her into using her magic just about every night, and despite her irritation with him she was almost always the last person in. Aelin wasn’t talking to him much anymore, just sitting and staring at her hands and tossing her phone on the counter after reading presumably irritating texts from someone. It was likely the boyfriend that he couldn’t stand, and it happened nightly like clockwork. She came in and had a glass of whiskey but barely drank it. Rowan had tried to tell her she didn’t have to pay for a drink she wasn’t going to drink, he could just as well give her a glass of ice water to watch the ice melt in, but she’d shot him a look full of fire and he’d filled her glass with Jameson like she’d asked. 

So every night he shot ice at her. Sometimes in the shape of cubes, sometimes in the form of little snowflakes. Those had almost made her smile, but she wouldn’t admit to it. 

Tonight, it was tiny arrows that would be annoying and sting at most or annoy the hell out of her in the least. Tonight, for the first time in weeks, it worked because finally, she’d had enough. 

And shot an arrow of fire directly for his face. 

“There you are,” he said, unable to hide the wide grin that took over his lips. 

And there she was indeed. 

@starseternalnighttriumphant @musicmaam @city-of-fae @kandasboi @the-regal-warrior @empire-of-wildfire @tangledraysofsunshine  @lorcansalvaterree @valarian-trash @hey-its-grey @sleeping-and-books @thephilosophyofblank @breezyfreezey @westofmoon @tonystarksbish @mariamuses @thereaderandfangirl @rosesandglass @xxhopelesspeachesxx  @flowerspringsea​ @the-bookloving-girl​ @but-she-was-aelin-galathynius​ @dreamcatchersimss​ @chemicha​ @vi0let-femmes​ @ttakeitbacknoww​   @bamchickawowow​

[jessi-writes-fandoms]

A new beginning: An OC story

Chapter 2

Another week had passed and Remedy and Nightshade were feeling right at home. Nightshade was slowly starting to come out of her shell, mostly because Remedy would force her out of their room. Remedy had dragged Nightshade over to Swerve’s bar so she could meet some of the others, Remedy was sitting at the bar chatting and laughing with Swerve, Chromedome and Rewind, each of them exchanging stories and jokes. Meanwhile Nightshade was sitting by herself just trying to avoid the noise coming from the other side of the room. After some time Whirl had asked to join her, she happily allowed him to join her in the mild silence of the dark corner.

“You don’t talk much do you?” Nightshade Kept her gaze at the wall next to her. “this just isn’t really my scene you know?” Whirl tilted his helm in confusion. “Then why are you here? Wouldn’t you be happier somewhere else?” Nightshade gave a long sigh and looked over at the bar where Remedy and a few of the others were having a good time. “I wish I could be more open like Remedy, despite what she did back on Cybertron the thought of being hated never really occurred to her.” Whirl looked over at the others and just groaned. Popularity is overrated, sure she probably loves being everyone’s friend but she’ll learn that it’s not all happy fun time around here. Did they tell you guys about the sparkeater that was on board a while back?” Nightshade was snapped from her thoughts. “There was a what?!”

Over at the bar Remedy was telling everyone about the many planets she and Nightshade have been to on their runaway adventure over the past couple thousand years. “I gotta say my favorite planet we been to was Earth, we pretty much used our holo avatars the entirety we were there. It’s amazing no one found us, I mean weren’t a majority of Autobots and Decepticons on earth as well? Oh and the music that the organics have is amazing!” The others simply laughed and continued on asking more about their adventures. Swerve slid another glass of high grade to Remedy. “So what exactly do you plan to do when all this is over, you know the whole finding the knights of Cybertron thing?” Remedy’s sweet cheerful smile suddenly turned to a scared and sad frown, she then took a swig of the high grade. “Ratchet said I could still possibly be arrested for what I did and Nightshade could be killed.” The others stared at her in disbelief, Rewind then gave Remedy a small hug.

“They won’t hurt you guys, they just can’t! Nightshade doesn’t seem like the type to hurt anyone and you’re too cute to be locked away.” Remedy gave a weak smile and thanked her new friends for caring so much for her and Nightshade despite them still being strangers on the large ship. Suddenly Rodimus walked into the bar and sat next to Remedy. “Well helloooo nurse~ how are you enjoying your stay? What am I talking about, you love it here! Look at you being all social and getting so much attention, but I’m sure you’re used to that.” Remedy gave a questioning look, not sure exactly how to respond. “uh.... not really? I kinda been with one other bot for the past couple thousand years.” Rodimus simply gave her a sly smirk. “C’mon Rem a femme like you should get all the attention, you deserve it.” Remedy rolled her optics and turned away from the captain. “I don’t seek attention from anyone.” Rodimus let out a bored sigh but continued to pester the young nurse. “Look you’re an attractive bot I bet there’s someone on this ship you got the hots for.”

Remedy suddenly froze, a faint blush crawling across her face. Sure there was a certain mech who she had thoughts about but she just pushes them aside, besides she’d never tell Rodimus who it was anyway. Knowing him he would probably shout it on the comm system so the whole ship would know who she had feelings for. “I’m gonna go check on Nightshade, I will see you guys later.” She then got up from the bar and walked over to the dark corner where Remedy and Whirl were seated and Whirl left to leave the two alone to talk. Nightshade gave Remedy a concerned look. “What’s wrong? You were having so much fun with the others and Rodimus actually talked to you!” Remedy sighed and sat down across from her good friend. “He always talks to me and it’s always flirting and asking who I have a crush on.” Nightshade lowered her wings in sadness and darted her eyes from Remedy’s gaze. I guess it’s not surprising he would flirt with you, you’re so pretty and I can barely talk to anyone. Wait you don’t have a crush on him do you?!” Remedy raised her servos in defense. “No, hell no I would never- Why would you even assume I liked him?”

“I seen the way he looks at you, and you always said you were a sucker for smooth talkers. Remember the other day when he pulled you from the medbay just so he could ask you about your hobbies and interests, then he started using all those pick up lines?” Remedy Rolled her optics remembering that annoyingly long five minutes of Rodimus asking about her personal interests and saying something stupid. “He’s really annoying, Ultra Magnus must be losing his shit dealing with him. I just wish he wouldn’t ask personal questions about who I have a crush on.” Nightshade suddenly looked at Remedy, her wings perked up in curiosity. “Do you have a crush on someone? You can tell me I promise not to laugh or say anything I swear!” Remedy sighed and gave in. “Ok fine. There is a mech I been thinking a lot about lately. We kinda had an awkward first meeting but something about him made my spark skip a beat.” Nightshade pulled Remedy out of the bar and grabbed her shoulder. “Tell me who it is already!” Remedy took a deep breath and told Nightshade the whole thing. “It’s Drift, but it’s just a crush, a phase nothing more. I told you I can’t do relationships anymore, not after all the pain they’ve caused me.”

Later that night on the opposite side of the Lost Light Rodimus was going over some things with Drift. “So Magnus was saying we should stop at this next planet, no idea what the name of it is but- Drift are you even listening?” Drift had been in a daze the entirety Rodimus was speaking to him. He had been doing this a lot recently and it was starting to get on Rodimus’ nerves. “What’s with you lately, you’re constantly zoning out and ignoring everyone. Drift? DRIFT?!” Drift was pulled from his thoughts from Rodimus’ sudden outburst. “I’m sorry, I just can’t stop thinking about her.” Rodimus gave a questioning look to the ex con. “Who? If there’s someone keeping you from listening to me I’m gonna have a serious talk with them.” Drift sighed and decided to just come clean about the whole thing.

“It’s Remedy, we became friends but I think I like her more than that.” Rodimus simply sat there with his helm on his servo, bored out of his processor as Drift continued talking. “She’s sweet and so beautiful, she’s like an angel. When I look into her optics it’s like seeing the well of allsparks.” Rodimus let out an annoyed groan. “Yeah she’s very hot, funny you mention her because I talked to her over at Swerve’s and I asked her if she had any sort of feelings for anyone.” Drift tilted his helm slightly. “What did she say? did she say who she liked? who is it?” Rodimus leaned back in his chair and thought for a moment. “She didn’t say anything she just kinda got up and left. Swerve said something about her having a bunch of failed relationships and she refuses to let herself fall in love, some bullshit like that.” Drift’s expression changed from that of curiosity to sadness at this new information. “I should’ve known I wouldn’t have a chance with her, she probably wouldn’t feel the same way even if I was to tell her how I feel.”

“She’s a nurse all you gotta do is get hurt and maybe she’ll kiss you better!” Drift gave a deadpan look, he couldn’t believe Rodimus would suggest something so dumb, actually he could believe it. “Ok how about when we get to this next planet you ask her to go check it out with you, Magnus said It’s supposedly full of glowing flowers and amazing scenery. Swerve said she’s obsessed with beautiful scenery, he says despite her not looking for love around here she’s a hopeless romantic.” Drift let his thoughts take over, the kind of thoughts he had been experiencing a lot lately, Thoughts of He and Remedy walking servo in servo, looking into each other’s optics whispering sweet nothings to each other. He wanted no more than to just be with Remedy and make her happy. Seeing her smile made his spark jump and he wished he could see that smile forever. Her caring nature, how she saved the life of a Decepticon knowing it was wrong, she didn’t judge she simply saw someone in need and helped them. She was perfect in every way in his optics, he would one day ask her to be his sparkmate.

“When will we be arriving at this planet?” Rodimus was busy etching little doodles on the top of his desk but suddenly spoke. “I don’t know maybe 5 days or maybe even a week? You know me I barely pay attention to anything Ultra Magnus says. If I were you, I would talk to Remedy but play it cool, be smooth about it femmes love a smooth talking mech.” Drift looked over at Rodimus with skepticism clear on his face. “You’re a smooth talker and you’re still single.” Rodimus looked slightly hurt by that statement. “This isn’t about me, this is about you! Also before you ask Remedy out, you may wanna talk to Ratchet about it.” Drift gave a confused look. Rodimus simply gave a sly smirk. “Apparently Ratchet has known Remedy since she was a sparkling, he practically raised her so he’s basically like her sire. I bet he’s like one of those “dads” like they have on earth, the ones who tell guys they’re not allowed to date their daughter or whatever. Ratchet might throw a wrench at you if you ask Remedy out.” Rodimus then started laughing at the thought of Ratchet beating the shit out any mech who dares to ask out his adopted daughter.

Drift decided to take Rodimus’ advice and talk to Ratchet seeing as how he knew Remedy better than anyone else. He couldn’t help but worry that Ratchet might get angry at him for wanting to ask Remedy out, sure Ratchet had a bit of a temper at times but surely he wouldn’t actually hurt someone without a good reason. Drift stood outside the medbay contemplating wether or not he should go through with it or not, the thought of being told he can’t be with the one bot he so dearly cared about began to eat away at his spark. After a few moments he walked inside the large room. “Ratchet, there’s something I need to ask you.” Ratchet looked up from what he was doing. “What is it Drift I’m a little busy at the moment, Remedy needed a break so I told her to go get some rest.”

Drift stood there fidgeting with his digits, he thought about simply walking away but decided to just go through with it. “Ratchet, I was wondering if it would be alright if I asked Remedy out.” Ratchet looked up from his work with questioning look on his face. “Not sure why you’re asking my permission, Remedy is a full grown femme she can make her own decisions, I just don’t want her dating Rodimus.” Drift let out a relived sigh, at least he wouldn’t have to face being hit with a wrench. “I must warn you Drift that Remedy can be rather stubborn, when she wants something she’ll do whatever it takes to get it. She won’t back down from any conflict, she’s strong headed so if you and her get in an argument just save yourself the trouble and tell her she’s always right.” Drift nodded and thanked Ratchet before leaving the medbay to go recharge, tomorrow he would ask Remedy out on a date.

[kyrie-silverwings]

Never Ending Survey: Kyrie Silverwings

Rules: Repost, do not reblog. Tag 10 blogs!

Tagged by: @blood-of-the-dragons, @under-the-blood-moonlight (you gets a Kyrie!)

Tagging: @kael-haustefort-xiv, @resistance-ranger, @lavender-hemlock, @bookbornexiv, @spotofmummery, @herohikara-wol, @lady-dusk-balmung, @cahli-tia, @seina-kurokiba, @of-sea-and-forest

BASICS.

FULL NAME: Kyrie Silverwings

NICKNAME: “Banshee”, “Mistress”

AGE:  ~28

BIRTHDAY:   5/26

ETHNIC GROUP: Hyur Midlander (in appearance)

NATIONALITY: not of Hydaelyn

LANGUAGE/S: Common, some understanding of others due to Echo

SEXUAL ORIENTATION : Pansexual

ROMANTIC ORIENTATION : Panromantic

RELATIONSHIP STATUS:  In a relationship

HOME TOWN / AREA:  a small forest village of hardly any note

CURRENT HOME:  Valorem Tenebris company house, personal apartment (both in Lavender Beds)

PROFESSION: Adder Captain, secretary / accountant (VT), information agent

PHYSICAL.

HAIR: White, usually shoulder length. Formerly a chestnut brown

EYES: Vibrant green, with an unsettling glow at times. When turned, the sclera is black

FACE: Slender, good bone structure, considered a dark beauty

LIPS: Medium-sized, usually with lipstick

COMPLEXION: Pale

BLEMISHES: An odd “birthmark” left on her left shoulder blade, a discoloration of the skin

SCARS: Few, mostly small faded ones from her childhood

TATTOOS: Purple patterns over her eyes and forehead, of unknown design

HEIGHT:  5′8″

WEIGHT: Average

BUILD: Slim, athletic, leans slightly pear-shaped

FEATURES:  Inconsistent hair growth, occasional eye patch, dark make-up. When turned, black veins across her body

ALLERGIES:  None.

USUAL HAIR STYLE:  Shoulder-length, feathered style. When long, it’s kept loose.

USUAL FACE LOOK :  An intrigued, bemused smile. Lidded eyes that cast about.

USUAL CLOTHING:  Prefers dark clothing, coats if travelling heavy, otherwise tends to wear moderately revealing attire

PSYCHOLOGY.

FEAR/S: Her past, falling back into old habits, apathy

ASPIRATION/S:  To commit to a peaceful existence, but still desires the strength to keep her allies safe

POSITIVE TRAITS: Adaptive, cunning, accepting of others, tenacious

NEGATIVE TRAITS: Callous, antagonizing, violently self-protective, prideful, reckless

TEMPERAMENT:  Phlegmatic

SOUL TYPE/S:  Warrior

ANIMALS:  fat cat tasmanian devil, black widow, hawk

VICE HABIT/S: soul harvesting, morbid curiosity, attracted to danger

FAITH: Next to none

GHOSTS?: Yes, unfortunately.

AFTERLIFE?: No

REINCARNATION?:  Not sure

POLITICAL ALIGNMENT: Unconcerned with politics, whether local or far-reaching. Willing to work with most clients.

EDUCATION LEVEL:  Self taught

FAMILY.

FATHER : Ewan of Astora (alive)

MOTHERS :  Nylea Silverwings (alive)

SIBLINGS : none

EXTENDED FAMILY: Naveia (grandmother), Yanne (aunt), Cyneric (grandfather)

NAME MEANING/S: comes from the Greek word for “lord” because... Dark Lord ending yes

HISTORICAL CONNECTION?: Nope.

FAVORITES.

BOOK:  History, reference material

DEITY: Gods already dead, thanks

HOLIDAY:  Closest would be All Hallow’s Eve

MONTH: November

SEASON:  Autumn

PLACE: A cozy cabin in the wilds of Limsa

WEATHER: Light rain

SOUND / S: Cat’s purring, the wind in the trees

SCENT / S:  Books, leather, faint perfume

TASTE / S:  Tea, blood in the mouth

FEEL / S:  Cold metal, soft black fabric, the whisper of shadow magic

ANIMAL / S:  Cats, snakes

NUMBER: 6

COLORS: Black. Purple. Green

EXTRA.

TALENTS: Good hunter, excellent tracker, excels in stealth 

BAD AT: Letting go of rivalries, giving up before overstepping boundaries

TURN ONS: Mysterious demeanor, height differences, strength, kindness, soft lingering touches, ruggedness, rough handling, beautiful eyes

TURN OFFS: Boorish manners, zealous attitudes, close-mindedness / bigotry

HOBBIES: Scouting across the Shroud, reading, collecting valuables for her company

TROPES: More Deadly than the Male, Double Agent, Silk Hiding Steel / Femme Fatale, Mysterious Woman, Wild Card (many more)

QUOTES : “I can handle this. Just watch, but don’t you dare interfere.”

MUN QUESTIONS.

Q1 : If you could write your character your way in their own movie,  what would it be called, what style would it be filmed in, and what would it be about?          

A1 :  I’m thinkin’ like how Interview with the Vampire was. Starts with her relating her story to, probably, another Adder and it goes over her life beginning with her curse and ending where she is now. May or may not kill the poor sod afterwards.

Q2 :  What would their soundtrack/score sound like?          

A2 :  Quiet, expressive orchestra. Ambient foreign vocals. I frequently listen to Dark Souls and Witcher music for background inspiration for her.

Q3 :  Why did you start writing this character?          

A3 : I used my Dark Souls oc and reworked her to interact with the story of FFXIV. She started out a bit “lighter and softer” than what she is now, but has grown quite a lot.

Q4 :   What first attracted you to this character?          

A4 : The theme of a girl who had to grow up very quickly in a bleak, hostile environment but pulls through due to support from friends and family. She has a dark side that I get to express that I don’t have in other characters. Unlike the rest, she’s hit the bottom before; writing her is a reminder of just how much worse things can be.

Q5 :  Describe the biggest thing you dislike about your muse.

A5 : She’s borderline antisocial and very bad at judging dangerous situations. Sh will walk into fights and will disregard whether she can win or lose, so she might come off as a liability...

Q6 :  What do you have in common with your muse?          

A6 :   Not much, but we love cats very much!

Q7 :   How does your muse feel about  you?          

A7 :   She’s probably surprised someone so nice could think of these terrible, horrible things to put her through.

Q8 :  What characters does your muse have interesting interactions with ?        

A8 :   Those with secrets or are similar to her. She’s slow to trust and that makes regular interactions difficult because of her aloof nature, but anyone who can break through her shell tends to find a good friend. Or...perhaps a rival should she desire to test your strength.

Q9 :  What gives you inspiration to write your muse ?        

A9 : DARK SOULS, but also anime and literature, anything thematically related to her

Q10 : How long did this take you to complete ?          

A10 : Several hours, since I was playing at the same time =v=;

[elaristalselin]

D&D Character Asks: Elaris Edition

I wanna do all of them because they’re all so good and I love my boy and Sara said to do all the odd ones anyway so....

1) A story for every scar. Do any of their wounds have interesting origins?

He doesn’t have many visible scars, actually! There is a stab wound on the right side of his back, that he sustained almost three years when he was still a naive, young adventurer newly out on his own. (For fellow party members, this is apocryphal and not part of his primary backstory) He met a drow woman known simply as “Darling” who recruited his help in a simple enough burglary job. Get in. Get out. Split the loot 60/40 and go their separate ways. They snuck in and out of a wealthy merchant’s manor while the family was out on holiday and made off with close to 2,000gp. He thought he’d be set for awhile, but when it came to part ways, Darling turned on him and took everything, leaving Elaris in the gutter with a dagger in the back. Luckily, in her haste she missed any vital organs or blood vessels and he recovered in time.

other than that, he’s made it through most of his life relatively unmaimed.

2) Three  five songs that show their character progression.

Ok so I have a playlist for this very reason! But it’s 37 songs long. If I had to narrow it down:

1. Beautiful Boys- CocoRosie

2. Bird Set Free- Sia

3. Dance Little Liar-Arctic Monkeys

4. Stars- fun.

5. All These Things That I’ve Done- The Killers

3) If they were a god which god would they be? (to quote my last post:)

Joanne the Scammer; next question please!

Seriously, though? I think The Traveler, among the Dark Six of Eberron is most like Elaris. His domains include chaos, charm, liberation, travel, and trickery, which is just about as close as I can find to what Elaris deified would be. Maybe add in a tiny bit of St. Anthony,the patron saint of the impoverished and oppressed. Elaris may not be a “good” person, but he empathizes and cares deeply for orphans, slaves, and minority races of Cartowitt. Other than those demographics, he’s always ready to charm and cheat his way into people’s wallets so I can’t really see him being even a chaotic good deity.

4) What was their favourite subject at school?

Elaris hated school as a child,but he found joy in music. It was something he was good at, and he loved weaving magic into each note of his compositions. He also enjoyed reading the ballads of the bards of old, and aspired to become one of them.

5) What does their voice sound like?

Elaris’ voice is a sultry tenor, with a vague, unplaceable but sophisticated-sounding accent. As a whole, he sounds a bit like a pretentious, highly educated asshole with a masters in Snobbery™

6) Animal, vegetable, mineral: what one thing symbolises them the most?

He’s got a small shell with mysterious carved runes on it that he has yet to decipher. The mystery of the shell is reminiscent of the secrecy he uses as a defense mechanism. 

If not, possibly his small pet mouse, Basil. He sees a lot of himself in Basil, from the petty theft to the insignificance of his role in the world, and would do anything to protect this old, fat mouse.

7) If they could control one of the four elements what would it be?

Probably Earth. I can Imagine him terraforming in a remote area trying to magically mine diamonds and other riches with the least amount of effort or sharing possible.

8) What would their favourite tv show be?

Probably some really ridiculous reality tv show, like Millionaire Matchmaker or one of the Real Housewives dramas. He takes joy in seeing the petty inconveniences of the rich and stupid, though deep down, his dream is probably to be a very wealthy and powerful sugar baby.

9) Would they ever use magic to gain love?

He uses magic to charm and manipulate others as part of his JOB. It’s what he was trained to do as a bard, really. He’s definitely used it to charm money out of people, but he wouldn’t ever like...sleep with anyone who didn’t approach him first or was too charmed to actually consent. 

He’s never truly fallen in love with someone, but if he did he wouldn’t want to magically ruin the integrity of their feelings. Being able to genuinely feel such things towards him is a huge step that he doesn’t think anyone would ever reach that point with him. By taking away that choice from them, he would be toying with them the same as any of the people he’s scammed and cheated.

10) What do they think of themself?

Elaris is confident in his skills as a bard, but he (justifiably) sees himself as a pretty shitty person. He likes himself just fine, but is afraid that others would turn on him if they knew who he really is. That’s part of the reason he works so hard on his facades; he doesn’t want people to really see the filth beneath his pristine mask.

11) Gender and sexuality?

Boring I know, but Elaris identifies as just a plain ol cis guy. He’s not afraid of femininity-- if anything he uses it to his advantage and keep people off guard. The way he explores fashion and gender expression as a whole leans towards androgyny, but his identity is still masculine.

12) Do they have a type?

Rich and stupid. If he can get a lot of cash out of them easily, he’ll go for anyone,really. 

If he were to get into an actual relationship, he’s attracted primarily to men and nonbinary folks. Regardless of appearance though, deep down he just wants someone he can match wits with that wouldn’t judge his past or skewed moral compass.

13) Playing video games, would they be a completionist, a speed runner, how would they play?

While WIlhelm would be a modder, Elaris wouldn’t mess with much beyond the occasional console command. He wouldn’t be a completionist per se, but he’d spend the vast majority of game time looking for workarounds to the conventional methods of playing. Will certain dialogue options affect ones later in the game? If you jump backwards 5 times after leaving the game on for three days, can you access a secret room that makes finding a rare item that much easier? He’d want to know

14) If they could solve one problem, what would they solve?

He’d really like to abolish slavery and diminish the roles and obsession surrounding the suits, sure, but most likely he’d want to set up plenty of soup kitchens, food banks, and homeless shelters to prevent children from ever dying from starvation and the effects of destitution.

15) What horoscope stereotype fits them the most?

He’s technically a Virgo, but he fits with the charming, diplomatic qualities of Sagittarius much better. 

16) Favourite terrain?

While not actual “terrain,” he loves the city and within the halls of the homes and manors within. Regal balls and social events have always fascinated him more than any wilderness, always dreaming of the danger and delight of court intrigue.

17) How do they dress?

His clothes range from masc to femme of center, but he cares more about the quality of materials used and the way they make him look. Rich furs, heavy velvets, and luxurious silks are his favorite materials to work with, especially if intricate details, such as embroidery or woven patterns are included. His favorite color is ultramarine, so often his outershirt will be similar hues. 

Please give this boy a reason to dress fancy. He loves fancy more than he loves himself

18) What would their ideal home be like?

It would be rich and luxurious, with fine furniture and fine trophies stolen throughout his escapades. However, it wouldn’t be too large. He may love the finer things in life, but also reviles absurd amounts of excess and the people associated with such extravagance. Fine and tasteful, rather than gaudy to the point of tackiness. To make it an actual home, he’d love to share it with the few friends he does have, along with those he had lost along the way. However, there’d always be a single extra guest room, intentionally left empty.

19) What would they like their mark in history to be? (to quote my last answer)

His whole schtick involves aliases and disguise to prevent infamy. If he were to gain a reputation as a conman, the gig would be up. In an ideal world, he would want to be portrayed as a young, famous musician or maybe even a charismatic diplomat who worked hard and built himself up from the ashes of his childhood to go on to live a fulfilling, preferably wealthy life. Maybe he’d have a beautiful, happy spouse and a life that’s normal and not too far beyond ordinary. Of course given his current circumstance and his outlook on the future, that’d never happen.

In this life, he’d be happy to fade into obscurity, living off the riches he’s swindled out of rich people through unnoticeable skimming and other forms of fraud.

20) If they could be a dragon, would they be a dragon?

To be or not to be, blah blah Hamlet is my favorite edgelord manbaby.

Really though, I don’t think he would be a dragon. Sure, he’ be powerful and rich beyond his wildest dreams, but brute force and intimidation aren’t his forte. He enjoys seduction and subterfuge too much to be a big lump of muscle, stomping around angrily to get his way.

[cripplinganxietyflix]

I saw Valerian.

If you’ve ever spoken to me at length about movies, there’s a good chance my thoughts on “headache cinema” have come up. It’s an umbrella term I’ve come up with that encompasses the deluge of loud, obnoxious, brainless, neutered, hundred-million-dollar-budgeted trashfests that are destroying theater culture as we know it. I’m talking about the Disney’s Marvel franchises, the post-Matrix Wachowski migraines, the Transformers films- head-exploding visual fuckfests that leave the average adult feeling like they’ve crawled out some hellscape version of a McDonald’s play palace birthday party. This brand of film is easily my least enjoyed and most disliked. The vast majority of the time these movies are castrated down to a PG-13- or worse, a PG!, they’ve got bloated budgets, dumb plotlines, stupid dialog, and best of all: punching, loud noises, explosions, TOTAL SENSORY OVERLOAD. 

For many years I have hated superhero movies and glazed over at Hollywood’s air-horn retreads of movies like Clash of the Titans and Independence Day: Resurgence and the recent Ghost in the Shell mishap. I hate movies like this and I find them at least majorly to blame for the death of the hard R-rated action flick. There are exceptions to the formula, like Mad Max: Fury Road, the 2014 Godzilla, and Dredd, but generally speaking, they’re unwatchable. I will be the first to admit that I’m not a big fan of whimsy, but I will be happy to defend my position on this. Giant blockbuster action movies are generally dumb and boring if you’ve got more than two brain cells to rub together. I do try to balance my feelings about people who like brain-dead, ham-fisted, infantile PG-13 sci-fi action movies with my penchant for unrepentantly trashy, low-brow 70s and 80s exploitation horror films. I know for a fact that there’s a certain segment of cinema elitists who would see my interest in that subgenre as an undeniable sign of being a philistine troglodyte, which slightly tempers my extreme prejudicial judgment of those who love headache cinema. 

I can pick up the hanging thread to unravel this tapestry. It’ll lead you through all of the recent loud crashing DC fiascos and the rainbow of annoying apocalypse and disaster films and CG shitshows. Once you hit the Star Wars prequels, you’re getting close. But the film that started all of this hatred is Luc Besson’s The Fifth Element, easily in my top five most despised films of all time (that’s a list for another day!). 

It feels a little bizarre for me to say that I hate Luc Besson. Léon: The Professional is one of my favorite films of all time, and easily my favorite film of 1994. But aside from that and 1990′s La Femme Nikita, I find Besson wholly intolerable. His movies tend toward obnxious, incomprehensible, overwhelming, anxiety-inducing horse shit. And while many people are happy to agree with me, it seems no one outside of myself is willing to slaughter the sacred cow that is The Fifth Element. Some see a sci-fi fantasy classic, I proffer that it’s a grotesque panacea of ADHD, loud noises and cringey acting. To Besson’s credit, most of the time his films don’t take themselves seriously, and that’s fine. But The Fifth Element is the first film in my memory where I felt literally assaulted and invaded by the unfettered gaudy head-spinning madness of big, loud, overwhelming movies. My level of general calmness could be compared to a that of a frightened rabbit with combat shock, so I try to be cognizant that this dislike has less to do with objective quality and more to do with my personal preferences and tolerance levels. Let’s be real- I’m a person with severe, crippling anxiety. Headache cinema is not made for me. 

That being said, I saw the trailers for Valerian and the City of a Thousand Planets, and I immediately started getting Vietnam flashbacks of Chris Tucker in a wig and leopard print jumping out of my television and screaming into my face. My significant other has a much more relaxed attitude toward these things and a seemingly endless well of patience for Luc Besson, so I had a feeling I was going to end up seeing this film in theaters and I started mentally preparing for it. And I’m really glad that I did all that emotional gestation, because I found Valerian to be surprisingly tolerable, aside from being a chaotic discombobulation of ideas that all generally have the potential to be good but fail because Luc Besson must have the attention span of a squirrel. And squirrels plant trees because they literally can’t remember where they’ve left their nuts. I couldn’t dream of a better summation of why Luc Besson turns nearly everything he touches into abject shit.

Valerian is essentially a very straight-forward narrative about a couple of federal agents (?) in space (???) who uncover a conspiracy involving a group of displaced aliens. They spend the film unraveling a mystery surrounding an enigmatic void in the middle of a space ship (?) or man-made planet (???) that contains thousands of different species from throughout the universe that live in surprising harmony. The alien refugees and the void on the ship or planet are related, you will later find. 

That’s basically it. It’s a simple storyline with simple elements like “war is bad” and “the powerful oppress the powerless” and “love is universal and always wins.” If you dig down past all of the color and noise and distraction, that’s the basic bedrock. I think I was expecting this movie to be a convoluted mess, and to a great extent it absolutely was. But I wouldn’t say that the story was the weakest part of the film. 

What did some substantial damage was the acting and dialog. The two leads had no chemistry and the actor playing the title character (Dane DeHaan) had a stunning drought of charisma. I think that his opposite, Cara Delevingne, has the potential to be a fun leading lady, but she never had a chance in this movie. The love angle was hackneyed and totally unnecessary to the point that the film would have fared much better if Valerian and Laureline were friends instead of a ~~will they or won’t they???~~ couple. I thought it was insulting to my sensibilities, and that sucks since the romance thing was such an ingrained aspect of the movie. I couldn’t tell if they were even in a relationship with each other or if Valerian had puppy love and Laureline has simply spent their entire careers fighting off his advances only to reluctantly agree to marry him after the film’s climax. This film could have really used a competent screen writer. I think I even could have lived with some of the eye-rollingly dumb but baseline-acceptable dialog you hear in Disney’s© Marvel™ Avengers Part 2: Electric Boogaloo. The villain (played by Clive Owen) was such a stupid caricature of literally everything that is wrong with Bad Guys in major American cinema- instantly hate-able, predictable, no angle or point of sympathy, stupid rationale for his actions-type of shit. And what’s really frustrating is that the Owen’s villain had a completely rational and utilitarian motive for his actions. But that gets torpedoed by the giant flashing neon signs that say “HE’S THE BAD GUY” and “EVIL PIECE OF SHIT” hanging over his head in every scene he’s featured in. It absolutely felt like the characters were totally empty and needed to be reworked from the ground up. I even thought Rihanna’s character had more depth than either Valerian or Laureline. Valerian’s a by-the-books soldier with a heart of gold? Could have fooled me! Laureline’s a toughgirl with a penchant for violent overreaction but still maintains a balanced moral compass? Hard to see through the horse shit nonsense they wrote for her. Character development and the script were both a total, unmitigated disaster.  

Another thing that I think the film failed at was building tension. Everything felt a little too whimsical and inconsequential. In the beginning, a bus full of mercenaries (?) is attacked by a violent hexapedal alien and Valerian and Laureline watch all of them die savagely with nothing more than a smirking “glad we made it outta that scrape!” reaction. It never really feels like they’re in any danger or that there’s any emotional peak or valley for the characters, with maybe a single, small exception. You watch a lot of people get shot to death and even a head get blown clean off and another cut right in half, but it all seems so cartoonish and trivial that you can’t help but feel like nothing really matters and it’s all just a low-stakes video game. 

But I don’t want to give you the impression that this movie is a complete trainwreck (it tries, believe me). There were things that I liked and appreciated. The visuals and alien designs were inventive and there was never really a moment where you couldn’t get lost in the scene. It kind of felt like Rick and Morty without the nihilism and good writing. Everything was very colorful, the universe felt very inhabited. Around halfway through, Valerian and Laureline have an almost brilliant run in with a species of giant food-obsessed frogs (I actually went through the trouble of looking it up; they’re called Boulan-Bathors) and I found the whole scenario to be kind of charming and cute. I didn’t really mind Rihanna’s cameo. The refugee aliens, the Pearls, were cool and appealing in the same translucent way as the Engineers of Prometheus. While I definitely felt some Avatar vibes, the whole opalescent, iridescent aesthetic was visually pleasing and I really liked the semi-androgynous thing they had going on. 

I think the strongest part of this film is the first several minutes that lays out Earth’s journey into space. It was beautiful and touching and enough to make you feel really depressed about the state of our space exploration programs and the hopelessness and polarization of our world affairs. I would liked to have seen more of a thematic connection to the introduction because it felt extremely dissonant with the rest of the movie, which, by comparison, is hard to feel particularly emotional about. If you’re not planning on seeing Valerian, I would at least recommend watching the first few minutes. If the movie had come full circle to it, you can see how it could have been brilliant. 

Overall, Valerian is kind of a giant mess, and by all means I should have absolutely hated it, because it is textbook headache cinema. I think that there was a wide dearth of missed opportunities with the material, and with a more competent screenwriter, a better cast, and maybe someone else in the director’s seat, we’d be talking about a viable start to a franchise. But too often Valerian ties its own shoelaces together and eats shit and expects us to be engrossed and entertained. The relationship between Valerian and Laureline- both as a friendship, coworkership and romance- either needed to be reengineered from the ground up or scrapped entirely. I think Dane DeHaan was totally wrong for the part of Valerian and I could see this movie succeeding in more ways had someone with more charisma been the leading man. Valerian desperately needed some tension, and the total absence of crisis or consequence left an unbridgeable emotional void. It’s beautiful- but it’s a mess, and that seems to be Luc Besson’s calling card. I doubt we’ll ever see another Léon, but if Besson’s next film is as much of an improvement on Valerian as Valerian was on Lucy, then we might have the potential to see something really special. And maybe in five to eight years when everyone has forgotten about this spectacle, we’ll get a decent reboot for the Valerian material. 

★ ★ ½

[thespecialverse]

A Scar Mila Valentine

For  DIDsandothersexyness

In a dreamy world, two of the hottest women in Hollywood today carry a torch for one another. One does not know that the other one knows or returns their affections. A few days past Mila Kunis sent a special invitation to Scarlett Johansson. The buxom beauty's presence is desired, it would appear, at Mila's home; for ScarJo this is an oppurtunity to get closer to the fellow celeb she's bene crushing on for a while. Scarlett grins to herself. On Valentine's Day, Mila Kunis, clad in a fancy and alluring black nighgown hidden in a thick matching dresing gown, saunters around her house. Unaware of Scalett's crush, Mila habrours he rown desires and feleings for the sexy buxom blonde with her full lips and all her curves in more than all the right places. Just then, she hears some noises coming from a nearby room. The vixen tiptoes on bare feet, curious more than alarmed, by the noises which turn out to be low muffled sounds as she approaches the downstairs bathroom. Cautiously, Mila pulls down the door handle and pushe sit open to find.....none other than Scarlett Johansson, albeit with long red Black Widow-style hair. Her blue eyes glare up at Mila wide before turning sultry. The buxom babe is scantily clad in a black and red bra and panties, barefoot, her hands tied tight behind her back, ankles roped together while her full lips and smooth cheeks are covered and sealed from ear to ear by a long wide strip of shiny silver duct tape, with red lips drawn on the region of the duct tape where Scarlett's real mouth is. The outline and red colour of the fake lips are immaculate and magnificent, as well as profoundly kinky. Mila stands before her unexpectedly chairtied guest, her dark eyes transfixed all over her buxom figure bound hand and foot in a chair and tightly muffled with a sticky gag. Scarlett grunts and struggles in her chair bondage, looking up half pleadingly, half teasingly at her hostess, mmphing softly into her shiny gag. Mila is gobsmacked further by this display of erotic helplessness. The mmphing stops as Scarlett looks at Mila, briefly gesturing towards the duct tape with her pretty sultry eyes. Mila just looks confused. "Jmst kmss mm mlrmndy!" The duct taped buxom hottie mumbles as clearly as she can through her tightly smoothed lipstick-clad silver mouth. "O-Oh." Mila blinks before bending over, leaning in closer to her bound and gagged crush's face, her lips purisng and her eyes closing dreamily. Scarlett closes her eyes likewise and soon Mila Kunis presses he rlips against the red lips drawn on the lips region of Scarlett Johansson's duct tape gag. ScarJo moans erotically, savoring the feel of her crush's lips...well, crushing her silver ones. Mila slowly fondles Scarlett's boobs, giving them the odd squeeze, elicting muffled squeaks from the sexy redhead. She even plays with her long red hair in mid-gag smooch. Scarlett tries gyrating and grinding as best she can chairtied as she is. Mila starts grinding hard against her crush in bondage who clenches her lovely bound hands into fists while mumbling teasingly into her gag. Breaking the kiss, Mila gasps staring into Scarlett's pretty eyes which flutter romantically. Mila takes the edge of the tape and Scarlett clenches her eyes shut, bracing herself for the gag removal. Smirking Mila suddenly rips the duct tape off Scarlett's full lips but leaves the strip hanging from her cheek. "Ah!" The Marvel Cinematic Universe starlet gasps, feleing a slight sting on her lips, before opening her eyes and looking deep into those of Mila Kunis. "So you feel the same way I do?" She asks with a breathless tone, her cleavage heathing as she breathes. Mila smiles, stroking Ms. Johansson's long hair. "I knew you've had some kind of thing for me. The thing is I always wanted to have you here, just like this." She pauses. "But the lips on the duct tape were an awesome, kinky touch." "Why, thank you." Scarlett replies in her best drawl, fluttering her eyes. "Time to take you upstairs." Mila remarks playfully slapping the tape back on Scarlett's delicious mouth, the drawn lips of red replacing her actual full ones, eliciting a sultry muffled moan from her. She rolls her eyes as Mila lovingly smooths out the tape. Untying her from the chair but leaving her hands bound behind and her ankles together, Mila Kunis carries a blushing Scarlett Johansson up to her bedroom, bridal-style. After plopping her on the bed, Mila undresses down to black bra and panties. She sits on the bed beside a mumbling Scarlett, opens her bedside drawer and slowly reaches in, taking out a handgun. "HMMMMPH!" Scarlett starts panicking at the sight of the weapon but is further muffled by Mila's hand. She stares at her pleadingly. "It's okay, my pretty." Mila says soothingly before opening fire.... Firing in Scarlett's gagged face isn't bullets or anything explosive, not even harmful; just plain water from a squirt pistol. "Hmm?" Scarlett glares at Mila who just shrugs with a comically awkward face. "WMTRR?!" Mila smiles. "Gotcha..." Scarlett groans in frustration. "Oh, baby, please don't be mad with me." She snuggles up beside Scarlett who smiles behind her gag. "Mm frrgmve ynn." With that, the two share another gag smooch. Soon, Mila slowly unties Scarlett but playfully grabs her wrists, looking depe into her eyes. "Keep that tape on, my pretty one." "Hmm-hmm." Scarlett nods before slowly and teasingly pulling off her top, pants, shoes and socks. Scarlett Johansson is retied, tighter than before and then Mila Kunis goes to town on her, kissing, fondling and grinding, even creeping behind the cups of her lacy bra to grope her stark bare nipples. Scarlett giggels, moans and chatters alluringly in an attempt to further arouse her captress while feeling her bare leg stroke against her own curvy thigh. Mila put on some music, "Another California Song" by Damhnait Doyle, and it plays the whole time the two sexy starlets make kinky love in bed, followed by "Complicated" by Avril Lavigne. As Avril's song ends, Mila is snuggled besides her red-haired buxom crush while Scarlett lies there in her grasp; this has been an intoxicating, seductive, exhilirating and...magical sexy time, perhaps the most she's ever had ever. Maybe she should have a little discussion with Kevin Feige and the Russos about giving her a DiD scene for a future MCU instalment; maybe Avengers: Infinity War or that damn too-long-awaited Black Widow movie?? Suddenly, as Mila Kunis gets up from her bed, she's surprised by a strangely familiar figure she partially hoped never to see, speicifically at this moment! It's the sexy femme who seduced, bound and gagged Mila before robbing her in the night, clad in the same catsuit and eyemask. "Oh, God!" Mila cries out in shock, half annoyance and half excitement. Scarlett lifts her head up to see. "Hmm? HMMMPH!" She screams through her well-stuck shiny silver gag, her eyes wide in shock and worry at the alluring lady thief. The sexy crook points a gun at the unexpected celebrity couple, Mila raising her hands anxiously at the sight of the pistol. "W-What do you want from me this time?" "Hmm?" Scarlett turns to Mila, raising a brow curiously. "I want you, my dear." The thief replies, approaching the bed. "But I see you have company." She glares down at the willingly captive buxom bombshell laid out on the bed. "Fine, alluring company indeed." Scarlett narrows her eyes at the intruder who just giggles. "Turn around and put your hands behind your back. Or the Black Widow gets a bullet." Scarlett whimpers worridly as her life now hangs in the balance and she can't put any of her training for the MCU or Ghost in the Shell to use. "Okay, I'll do what you want." Mila does as she's told, staring down sadly at Scarlett while trying to give her a reassuring expression as she feels tight cold metal cuffs clamp on her wrists. She tugs at her metal bonds. She feels tight rope bind her bare ankles now. "Everything's gonna be fine, Scarlett Johansosn." Mila tries to say as heroically a spossible while she can hera her seductive captress pull at a roll of duct tape. "Everything's gonna be all-" Too late! "-rmght. Hmm...." Mila moans into her tightly smoothed silver ear-to-ear gag. The thief then gets ScarJo up from the bed and pairs the two beautie sup close to each other, face to face. Then, looking at both of them, the thief takes out a red lipstick. She carefully draws a pair of red lips in a kiss on Mila's silver mouth to match Scarlett's. As both looks at each other and awkwardly glance at one another's scantily-clad form, they're tightly bound with more rope pinning their hot bodies against each other to the point where their silver red lips-clad mouths press tight against each other. "Hmmm!" Scarlett whines awkwardly, glancing sideways at their captress. "Don't worry, ScarJo." The thief slowly gropes the helpless redhead's curves. "You and me will get some screentime soon." She slaps ScarJo's ass, elicting a muffled rant. As they're stashed in the trunk of the car and driven away, Mila Kunis and Scarlett Johansson, struggles against their kinky, intimate bonds, screaming into their tight, sticky gags while thrashing as much as they can. Finally the two give up when suddnely Mila presses her already pressed silver gob against Scarlett's while the redhead does likewise, even making kissing noises form behind her gag. They begin rubbing gags with ne another, savoring as much more as they can from this special Valentine's, either about to be made more exciting or more terrifying with this unexpected abduction that could lead to pretty much anything...... THE END....??