#she's a pot stirrer she stirs pots it's what she does

[spacejellyfish3]

broke: Nefera and Toralai were the villains of G1

woke: G1 Spectra was the schemiest jerk bitch this side of the catacombs jeez (excluding character development come Haunted)

[whencallstheheart]

Brian quoted a Lucas/Elizabeth fan tweet on his page. This fan said that in S8 they had something similar with them but the season ended beautifully for them on the bridge. That Elizabeth did not say that she was in love with Nathan. Or that they even broke up. Basically a tweet giving full hope that they will reunite in the season finale. Please tell me that this is just Brian stirring the pot/trying to get them to watch next week. HOW can they reunite logically if he is the "safe" choice????

I saw he was retweeting a lot of crap last night so I wouldn't read anything into it. He's a pot stirrer. That's what he does. If you watch the interview, everyone is on the same page about Lucas and Elizabeth going in different directions. The plot they came up with for Lucas moving forward couldn't/can't happen if he's with Elizabeth.

[mrsbsmooth]

Scripts - S7 - Episode 32 (Part 1 of 2)

'Most likely to'

NARRATOR: Welcome back to Love Island where I’ve been scratching my head ever since the last episode.

NARRATOR: Is it dandruff? My itchy woolly hat? My new bubblegum shampoo?

NARRATOR: Or maybe I’m just trying to figure out why {0} pulled {1} for a super secret chat after the final dates?

NARRATOR: Let’s just jump back in and find out shall we? I’m <i>itching</i> to know.

{0} is awaiting {1}’s answer.

PLAYER_IDLE: What’s this all about?

{0}_IDLE: Nothing, just something I need to speak to {1} about.

{0}_IDLE: So, {1}. Can we chat or what?

{0}_EMBARRASSED: Erm, yeah sure?

{0}_IDLE: I’ll see you in a bit, {1}.

They walk away and start to chat just out of your earshot.

Uma joins you as you watch {0} and {1} having their private chat.

UMA_FLIRTY: I wonder what that’s all about?

UMA_FLIRTY: Aren’t you curious?

Obviously I am!

PLAYER_SURPRISED: Of course I am! What does she want with {0}?

UMA_SURPRISED: Who knows!? I guess we’ll find out soon enough.

UMA_EMBARRASSED: It’s probably nothing anyway…

I don’t need to know

PLAYER_IDLE: I don’t need to waste my time speculating.

UMA_IDLE: To be honest, nothing in here stays secret for too long, so you’re right.

UMA_IDLE: You don’t need to speculate, you’ll probably find out at some point.

Stop stirring the pot

PLAYER_IDLE: Uma.

UMA_IDLE: Yeah?

PLAYER_IDLE: Is your hand tired?

UMA_EMBARRASSED: What? Why would my hand be tired?

PLAYER_IDLE: From stirring the pot.

UMA_SURPRISED: I’m not trying to be a stirrer!

UMA_FLIRTY: But if it were my partner and {0}, I wouldn’t still be standing here.

UMA_FLIRTY: I’d be in a nice hiding spot, listening in.

Before you can reply, you get a text.

You read it aloud.

LITEXT: Girls, get ready because a car is waiting to whisk you away for a shopping trip! It’s time to get prom ready. {0}PromQueens {1}ShopOClock

PLAYER_HAPPY: It’s prom time!

UMA_HAPPY: And we get to go shopping!

You see {0} and {1} wrapping up their chat. They head over to you and the others.

{0}_HAPPY: Did I hear someone say shopping?!

PLAYER_IDLE: Yep, you did.

VICKY_HAPPY: This is going to be fun. Just us girls, leaving the villa.

BONNIE_HAPPY: I already know we’re going to look incredible.

UMA_HAPPY: I’m excited! I can’t wait to try on some gorgeous outfits.

Get me there ASAP!

PLAYER_HAPPY: I am super excited!

PLAYER_HAPPY: We’re wasting valuable shopping time.

UMA_HAPPY: Good point, {0}!

I’m chill about it

PLAYER_IDLE: I’m not overly fussed right now.

UMA_SURPRISED: I expected better, {0}.

UMA_HAPPY: We’re going to have fun, you’ll see!

The others gather around, hearing about your shopping trip.

{0}_SAD: What? No prom shopping for us?

PLAYER_HAPPY: Sorry, boys, it’s girls only.

{0}_SAD: Aww, I’ll miss you.

PLAYER_IDLE: I’ll see you when I’m back.

PLAYER_IDLE: Plus it’s more of a surprise this way.

{0}_HAPPY: Yeah, I guess so. You girls have fun.

UMA_HAPPY: See you later, boys!

You and the girls wave to the boys as you rush out of the villa to a waiting car.

You and the girls arrive at the dress shop, buzzing with excitement.

The walls are lined with all kinds of elegant prom dresses.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Wow. There’s so many to choose from!

UMA_HAPPY: I don’t know how I’m going to choose? Guess, I’ll have to try everything on.

{0}_HAPPY: I can’t wait to get glammed up!

UMA_HAPPY: You and me both, {0}.

VICKY_HAPPY: This is honestly a dream.

BONNIE_HAPPY: The boys don’t know what they’re missing.

{0} pulls you to one side.

{0}_HAPPY: I want you to be blown away when you see me, {1}.

{0}_HAPPY: And in order to get the jaw to the floor reaction I want.

{0}_HAPPY: You just cannot witness the trial and error phase.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Which means?

{0}_HAPPY: I’m going to try on my choices over there.

{0} gestures to the far end of the shop.

{0}_HAPPY: I’ll see you soon!

{0} hurries off, grabbing a few dresses as she goes.

UMA_HAPPY: Ok so, {0} clearly has several options.

UMA_HAPPY: What about you?

UMA_HAPPY: This is the big one, girls.

UMA_HAPPY: Our chance to be as extra, glamorous and over the top as we want!

UMA_HAPPY: No holding back, these looks need to be out of this world.

UMA_FLIRTY: Can’t be letting ourselves down in this iconic moment!

UMA_HAPPY: {0}, what are you thinking? You always set a high bar.

PLAYER_HAPPY: How about this dress?

UMA_HAPPY: Ten, ten, ten, across the board!

{0}_SURPRISED: Woah, {1}. I’m speechless.

VICKY_HAPPY: Stunning!

UMA_HAPPY: It’s a winner for sure, {0}. You have to go for that!

*TRYOUTFIT* Agreed, this is the one!

I want to see something else

PLAYER_IDLE: I think I’ll go with this.

UMA_IDLE: Are you sure you don’t want to try something else?

UMA_HAPPY: That first look was out of this world!

UMA_FLIRTY: We only get one shot at the prom after all.

I’ll try that outfit on again!

UMA_HAPPY: If I could whistle I would.

UMA_HAPPY: But I can’t, so I’ll just say you look amazing.

*TRYOUTFIT* Agreed! I’m wearing this

I’ll wear something else

Let me see the other options again

I’m good

PLAYER_IDLE: I’m going with this.

UMA_HAPPY: Whatever makes you feel good, {0}.

UMA_HAPPY: I have a declaration, {0} is an absolute snack.

{0}_FLIRTY: I have to agree.

VICKY_HAPPY: One hundred percent.

BONNIE_HAPPY: An inspiration to us all!

PLAYER_HAPPY: I won’t argue with that.

UMA_HAPPY: And neither will, {0}!

UMA_HAPPY: {0}, you look simply fabulous darling.

{0}_FLIRTY: I have to agree.

VICKY_FLIRTY: One hundred percent.

BONNIE_HAPPY: An inspiration to us all!

PLAYER_HAPPY: I won’t argue with that.

UMA_HAPPY: We better find our outfits too!

UMA_HAPPY: Wow, wow, wow girls. We have really gone and done it this time.

VICKY_HAPPY: We are unstoppable!

BONNIE_HAPPY: Prom here we come!

{0}_FLIRTY: I don’t know how our partners are going to get through their declarations.

{0}_FLIRTY: We look distractingly good.

UMA_FLIRTY: Hands down the hottest final girls.

UMA_FLIRTY: Speaking of declarations, how are we feeling about those?

I can’t wait!

PLAYER_HAPPY: I can’t wait to hear what {0} has to say!

UMA_HAPPY: It’s definitely going to be ridiculously sweet, that's for sure.

UMA_HAPPY: I hope {0} takes it seriously. I’ve told him he has a three joke limit.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Oh, he’s definitely going above that.

UMA_EMBARRASSED: I hope {0} isn’t too lovey dovey, I don’t know if I can handle that.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Don’t you think it could be romantic?

UMA_EMBARRASSED: That’s the problem, it will be and I’ll lose my cool and probably cry.

PLAYER_HAPPY: {0} will say everything I want to hear… fingers crossed.

I’m a little nervous

PLAYER_EMBARRASSED: My stomach is all fluttery, I’m a bit nervous about it.

UMA_SURPRISED: Why?

PLAYER_EMBARRASSED: Because what if {0} says something I don’t want to hear?

PLAYER_EMBARRASSED: What if we realise we’re on different pages.

UMA_EMBARRASSED: When you put it like that…

{0}_SURPRISED: Cut it out!

Haven’t thought about it

PLAYER_IDLE: You know something, the declarations haven’t even crossed my mind.

UMA_SURPRISED: Erm, how?!

You shrug at Uma.

{0}_IDLE: I haven’t had my mind on the declarations either.

{0}_HAPPY: We do have a wild party to attend before everyone spills their feelings.

{0}_HAPPY: I’m planning on hitting that dance floor big time!

UMA_HAPPY: What do you want to get up to tonight, {0}?

Dance all night

PLAYER_HAPPY: I only want to be seen on the dance floor, Uma.

UMA_HAPPY: I am so into that, {0}, I will be right there beside you.

UMA_HAPPY: We’re in for a good night that’s for sure.

Get closer to {0}

PLAYER_HAPPY: I want to spend my night getting closer to {0}.

UMA_HAPPY: Aww, aren’t you just the cutest.

UMA_HAPPY: You’re going to have a blast.

Just go with the flow

PLAYER_HAPPY: I’m just going to go with the flow, see where the night takes me.

UMA_HAPPY: Check you out, being a free spirit.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Keeps things interesting.

UMA_HAPPY: I bet.

Whilst the others go off to check themselves out in the mirror you’re left with {0}.

PLAYER_IDLE: So…

{0}_IDLE: So…

PLAYER_IDLE: What did you want to talk to {0} about earlier?

{0}_HAPPY: I think I just saw the car pull up to take us back!

PLAYER_IDLE: It can wait two minutes…

UMA_HAPPY: Car’s outside, ladies. Let’s go, I want to party!

{0}_IDLE: We’ll talk later.

You and the girls leave the shop and head out to the car.

You arrive back at the villa and are greeted by a garden decorated with fairy lights and bunting.

Music is pumping, the party has started.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Here we go, girls!

UMA_HAPPY: It’s party tiiime!

UMA_HAPPY: Turn around, {0}.

You face away as Uma leads {0} to stand in front of you.

UMA_HAPPY: Turn around!

You turn around and see {0} standing in her prom dress.

{0}_FLIRTY: I’m lost for words.

{0}_FLIRTY: Everytime I think you can’t get any better, you come along in an outfit like that.

{0}_FLIRTY: I knew I’d never be able to top you.

{0}_FLIRTY: You look incredible, {1}.

{0}_HAPPY: Wow. You look spectacular.

{0}_FLIRTY: I knew I’d never be able to top you.

{0}_HAPPY: Wow. You look great.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Thanks.

{0}_HAPPY: It was definitely worth hiding in the backseat for the reveal.

She gives you a twirl.

{0}_HAPPY: So, what do you think?

The boys wait in a line in the garden. You lock eyes with {0}.

{0}_HAPPY: I’m lost for words.

{0}_HAPPY: Everytime I think you can’t get any better, you come along in an outfit like this.

{0}_FLIRTY: You look incredible, {1}.

{0}_HAPPY: Wow. You look spectacular.

{0}_FLIRTY: I knew I’d never be able to top you.

{0}_HAPPY: Wow. You look great.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Thanks.

{0}_HAPPY: What do you reckon, am I at your level?

You eye up {0}’s outfit.

You’ve outdone yourself

PLAYER_FLIRTY: You’re the gift that keeps on giving.

PLAYER_FLIRTY: I can’t detect a flaw, you’ve achieved perfection tonight.

{0}_FLIRTY: That’s only because I had to match what you would bring to the table.

{0}_FLIRTY: I couldn’t be basic and stand next to you.

Did you try?

PLAYER_EMBARRASSED: Did you actually try? I really can’t tell.

{0}_EMBARRASSED: My ego and I are going to say you’re joking right now.

PLAYER_IDLE: Whatever helps.

We win best dressed

PLAYER_HAPPY: You and I are giving best dressed.

{0}_HAPPY: No lies told, {1}.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Bit rude nobody got us a trophy.

{0}_HAPPY: Their jealousy prevented it.

The others swoop in on your chat.

{0}_HAPPY: We all scrub up pretty well.

{0}_HAPPY: Why do you sound surprised?

{0}_HAPPY: We’re a good looking set of lads and don’t even get me started on the girls.

{0}_IDLE: Yeah, you all look incredible.

{0}_FLIRTY: A villa full of knock outs.

UMA_FLIRTY: We all look, mwah, chef’s kiss.

UMA_FLIRTY: Now, let’s dance!

Uma grabs {0} and they start doing an intricate dance routine.

PLAYER_SURPRISED: Did you rehearse this?

UMA_HAPPY: Nope, we’re just that in sync.

PLAYER_SURPRISED: Really?

UMA_HAPPY: Of course not, this is what we’ve been doing after everyone falls asleep.

{0}_FLIRTY: That and some other things…

UMA_FLIRTY: The man has stamina, I’ll give you that.

You and the other couples watch on as Uma and {0} dance, their bodies moving together as one.

{0}_EMBARRASSED: Feel like some people may need to get a room…

{0}_HAPPY: It’s a bit much, but I respect the training that went into it.

As the routine comes to an end, Uma goes to the other end of the lawn and runs towards {0}.

It looks like she is going for a big lift, but she bottles it at the last minute.

UMA_EMBARRASSED: I just can’t do the lift!

{0}_EMBARRASSED: We never quite nailed it in rehearsal.

Everyone cheers regardless.

That was everything!

PLAYER_HAPPY: Uma, that was the best thing I’ve seen all year.

PLAYER_HAPPY: The chemistry was really coming through.

PLAYER_FLIRTY: You really know how to dance.

UMA_HAPPY: Aww, thanks, {0}!

{0}_FLIRTY: I reckon I could top that.

{0}_FLIRTY: How about you, {1}? Do you think you can dance?

I’m still cringing

PLAYER_EMBARRASSED: It was very over the top.

PLAYER_EMBARRASSED: I’ve got a bit of second hand embarrassment.

{0} does a shrug.

{0}_IDLE: Not everyone can be a fan.

UMA_HAPPY: I still thought we nailed it.

{0}_IDLE: Well, {1}, since you’ve sussed out what makes a good routine.

It was ok, but I’d be better

PLAYER_FLIRTY: You put on a good show, but I think I could have done it better.

UMA_HAPPY: The absolute cheek!

{0}_FLIRTY: Why don’t you prove you could do it better, {1}?

{0}_FLIRTY: What if I challenge you and {1} to a dance off…

The others cheer in excitement.

{0} struts over to {1}.

She runs her hands over his body before turning and dropping to the floor in front of him. She comes back up and grinds against him.

She lets his hands explore her body as she shakes her hips to the rhythm. With one final twerk she ends her performance.

She does a bow as the others applaud.

{0}_FLIRTY: That was something else.

{0} gives him a wink before turning to you.

{0}_FLIRTY: You think you and {1} can top that?

{0}_HAPPY: Or maybe you don’t quite have the same chemistry that me and {1} have?

PLAYER_IDLE: Yeah, right…

{0}_HAPPY: Why don’t you prove it?

{0}_FLIRTY: You up for the challenge, {1}?

*Steal the show from {0}

PLAYER_FLIRTY: Oh you’re so on!

PLAYER_FLIRTY: {0}, I hope you’re ready for the dance of your life.

{0}_FLIRTY: I can’t wait.

Bow out

PLAYER_IDLE: I’m bowing out of this one.

{0}_HAPPY: Afraid I’ll show you up?

{0}_HAPPY: I don’t blame you for being worried.

{0}_HAPPY: I’m pretty intimidating on the dance floor.

{0}_HAPPY: Plus you and {1} probably don’t have the same communication we have.

*Challenge accepted!

PLAYER_FLIRTY: Oh, you’re so on!

PLAYER_FLIRTY: {0}, I hope you’re ready for the dance of your life.

{0}_FLIRTY: I can’t wait.

I’m out

PLAYER_IDLE: Yeah, I’m out.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Dance challenges aren’t for me.

{0}_FLIRTY: Sure! Don’t blame you.

{0}_HAPPY: My moves are pretty sensational.

{0}_HAPPY: We don’t need a silly challenge to dance together…

You take {0} by the hand and lead him to a chair.

You place yourself on his lap and straddle him. Rotating your hips slowly. {0} bites his lip, loving the show.

You stand up and turn around, letting {0} get a good look at every inch of you. As you elegantly move your whole body.

You sit back down, facing away from him and rest your hands on his thighs for support as you gyrate on {0}’s lap.

He stands and takes your hand, spinning you around on the spot and pulling you in close.

He holds you tight to him. Your hips moving in unison in time to the rhythm. He stares deep into your eyes, you’re completely in sync.

You lean forward, wrapping your arms around {0}’s neck as he dips you gently.

You take {0} by the hand and lead her to a chair.

You place yourself on her lap and straddle her. Rotating your hips slowly. {0} bites her lip, loving the show.

You stand up and turn around, letting {0} get a good look at every inch of you. As you elegantly move your whole body.

You sit back down, facing away from her and rest your hands on her thighs for support as you gyrate on {0}’s lap.

She stands and takes your hand, spinning you around on the spot and pulling you in close.

She holds you tight to her. Your hips moving in unison in time to the rhythm. She stares deep into your eyes, you’re completely in sync.

You lean forward, wrapping your arms around {0}’s neck as she dips you gently.

End it with a hot kiss

You put your lips on {0}’s, he places his hands on the back of your neck pulling you closer.

You hear the others whistling and clapping.

You ignore the noise and focus on him. The kiss intensifies as he pulls you closer to him.

You feel weightless as he leans you back further, like you’re floating off the ground.

All you can feel is his lips pressed to yours and the air beneath you as he lifts you off the ground.

You part your lips as your tongues connect, you feel the warmth of his breath and his desire for you.

UMA_HAPPY: Get a room!

You finally break apart.

You end the kiss and tilt your head so you can look into {0}’s eyes.

You can tell he would have kissed you all night if you’d let him.

You put your lips on {0}’s, she places her hands on the back of your neck pulling you closer.

You hear the others whistling and clapping.

You ignore the noise and focus on your partner. The kiss intensifies as she pulls you closer to her.

You feel weightless as she leans you back further, like you’re floating off the ground.

All you can feel is her lips pressed to yours and the air beneath you as she lifts you off the ground.

You part your lips as your tongues connect, you feel the warmth of her breath and her desire for you.

UMA_HAPPY: Get a room!

You finally break apart.

You end the kiss and look into {0}’s eyes. You can tell she would have kissed you all night if you’d let her.

End it with a kiss on the cheek

{0} holds onto your waist pulling you closer.

You hear the others whistling and clapping.

You kiss {0} gently on the cheek.

A huge smile curls across {0}’s lips.

End it with a hug

PLAYER_FLIRTY: I feel like ending this with a hug.

{0}_FLIRTY: Sounds perfect to me.

{0} holds onto your waist pulling you closer. You feel the warmth of {1}’s body against yours.

Both of your hearts beating through your chests as your breathing settles and you are left in a caring embrace.

Leave them wanting more

You pull away, leaving {0} in a romantic daze.

{0} looks over at you in amazement.

{0}_HAPPY: That was incredible!

You and {0} stand and join the group who applaud wildly.

{0}_HAPPY: I have to give it to you, {1}.

{0}_HAPPY: You definitely won that.

UMA_HAPPY: Oh, for sure! That was unbelievable!

{0}_HAPPY: No one is topping that!

{0}_HAPPY: I never doubted you would win, {1}.

The music slows down to a ballad. {0} holds out his hand.

The music slows down to a ballad. {0} holds out her hand.

{0}_HAPPY: Shall we?

You take {0}’s hand, you dance slowly and intimately. The other couples follow your lead.

You look into {0}’s eyes.

{0}_HAPPY: This is a pretty perfect evening.

{0}_FLIRTY: I think we could make it even better though.

PLAYER_FLIRTY: What did you have in mind?

{0}_FLIRTY: Maybe a kiss, maybe a hug?

{0}_FLIRTY: Maybe another kiss, maybe a hug?

{0}_FLIRTY: Maybe a kiss, or maybe another hug?

Give {0} a full on kiss

PLAYER_FLIRTY: A kiss is calling my name.

{0}_FLIRTY: If I didn’t know any better I’d say you can’t get enough of me.

PLAYER_FLIRTY: I’m a sucker for a good kisser.

{0}_SURPRISED: Only good.

{0}_FLIRTY: I need to try and improve my rating.

PLAYER_FLIRTY: No time like the present.

{0}_FLIRTY: Love to hear it, {1}.

You kiss {0} deeply, he holds onto your waist, pulling you closer to him.

You feel {0}’s want for you growing as he kisses you.

The others can’t help but egg you on.

Your tongue gently brushes his lips before he parts them, letting your tongue slip inside.

You feel the passion building inside you with each shared breath.

You kiss {0} deeply, she holds onto your waist, pulling you closer to her.

You feel {0}’s want for you growing as she kisses you.

Your tongue gently brushes her lips before she parts them, letting your tongue slip inside.

You feel the passion building inside you with each shared breath.

Go for a kiss on the cheek

PLAYER_FLIRTY: A kiss on the cheek sounds great to me.

{0}_FLIRTY: If I didn’t know any better I’d say you can’t get enough of me.

PLAYER_FLIRTY: I can neither confirm nor deny.

{0} turns so his cheek is facing your lips.

{0} turns so her cheek is facing your lips.

{0}_FLIRTY: Plant one on me.

You give {0} a lingering kiss on the cheek.

Hug

PLAYER_FLIRTY: A hug would be lovely.

{0}_FLIRTY: If I didn’t know any better I’d say you can’t get enough of me.

PLAYER_FLIRTY: I can neither confirm nor deny.

You let your head rest on {0}’s chest as he tightens his arms around you, locking you in a loving embrace.

You let your head rest on {0}’s shoulder as she tightens her arms around you, locking you in a loving embrace.

You separate and {0} looks at you in a lovestruck daze.

{0}_FLIRTY: I’m incredibly lucky to be coupled up with you, {1}.

PLAYER_FLIRTY: Glad you know it.

The music stops abruptly.

{0}_SURPRISED: What’s that about?

Your phone pings.

PLAYER_SURPRISED: I’ve got a text!

UMA_SURPRISED: What’s it say?

Everyone gathers around you as you read the text aloud.

LITEXT: Islanders, it wouldn’t be a prom without a King and Queen, but before they can be crowned it’s time to play Islander Most Likely To…

LITEXT: Islanders, it wouldn’t be a prom without a King and Queen, or a Queen and Queen, but before they can be crowned it’s time to play Islander Most Likely To…

Everyone rushes to the firepit.

Vicky’s phone pings. She reads out the text.

LITEXT: Which Islander is most likely to propose?

UMA_HAPPY: That’s a fun one.

{0}_HAPPY: If Raf was still here, he would get my vote easy.

VICKY_HAPPY: It’s gotta be Alex, surely.

UMA_HAPPY: I don’t want to toot my own horn, but I agree. Alex gets my vote.

{0}_HAPPY: Nope, I don’t think it’s Alex.

TRAVIS_HAPPY: I’m with Vicky. I think the man has settle down energy.

VICKY_HAPPY: It’s gotta be Alex, surely.

{0}_HAPPY: Nope, I don’t think it’s Alex.

{0}_HAPPY: I’m with Vicky. I think the man has settle down energy.

ALEX_HAPPY: You all think you know me so well huh?

ALEX_HAPPY: {0}, you make the call.

I think it’s Alex

PLAYER_HAPPY: It has to be Alex.

{0}_FLIRTY: Is that wishful thinking, {1}?

PLAYER_FLIRTY: If I was up for it you’d marry me in a heartbeat.

{0}_FLIRTY: Loving the confidence, it’s a good look on you.

ALEX_HAPPY: I’ll take that title, I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

ALEX_HAPPY: It’s a nice legacy.

It’s so not Alex

PLAYER_IDLE: Alex isn’t getting my vote.

{0}_HAPPY: Not sure whether to feel offended or not.

PLAYER_HAPPY: My gut says there’s another Islander more likely than you.

UMA_FLIRTY: Well, don’t leave us waiting, who should it be?

Has to be {0}

PLAYER_HAPPY: It has to be {0}.

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award {0} the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

{0}_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

{0}_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

{0}_HAPPY: There are worse titles to have.

{0} smiles at vicky.

It’s {0}

PLAYER_HAPPY: It’s got to be {0}.

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award {0} the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

{0}_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

{0}_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

{0}_HAPPY: There are worse titles to have.

{0} smiles at Uma.

{0}

PLAYER_IDLE: Has to go to {0}.

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award {0} the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

{0}_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

{0}_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

{0}_HAPPY: There are worse titles to have.

{0} smiles at {1}

{0}

PLAYER_HAPPY: Has to be {0}.

{0}_FLIRTY: Is that wishful thinking, {1}?

PLAYER_FLIRTY: If I was up for it you’d marry me in a heartbeat.

{0}_FLIRTY: Loving the confidence, it’s a good look on you.

PLAYER_FLIRTY: Oh I know.

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award {0} the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

{0}_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

{0}_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

{0}_HAPPY: It’s a nice legacy.

It’s clearly Uma

PLAYER_HAPPY: Has to be Uma!

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award Uma the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

UMA_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

UMA_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

UMA_HAPPY: There are worse titles to have.

UMA_HAPPY: But don’t start measuring for a suit just yet, {0}.

Got to be Vicky

PLAYER_HAPPY: Got to be Vicky!

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award Vicky the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

VICKY_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

VICKY_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

VICKY_HAPPY: There are worse titles to have.

Vicky smiles at {0}.

I vote {0}

PLAYER_HAPPY: It’s definitely {0}.

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award {0} the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

{0}_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

{0}_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

{0}_IDLE: But don’t start measuring for a suit just yet, {1}.

{0} smiles at {1}

I’m voting for moi

PLAYER_HAPPY: It’s me, I’m most likely to propose first.

{0}_FLIRTY: I better start looking for my suit then.

{0}_FLIRTY: I better decide what dress I’m wearing.

PLAYER_FLIRTY: And who said I’m proposing to you?

{0}_HAPPY: Ow, my ego!

PLAYER_FLIRTY: You love the banter really.

{0}_FLIRTY: If you’re saying it, I’m enjoying it, that’s a given.

UMA_FLIRTY: Alright you two, take a breather.

UMA_FLIRTY: If there are no objections can we award {0} the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

Has to be Bonnie

PLAYER_HAPPY: It has to be Bonnie.

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award Bonnie the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

BONNIE_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

BONNIE_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

BONNIE_HAPPY: If I meet the right person, I’m going for it!

It’s {0}

PLAYER_HAPPY: It’s got to be {0}.

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award {0} the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

{0}_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

{0}_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

{0}_HAPPY: There are worse titles to have.

{0} smiles at Uma.

{0}

PLAYER_IDLE: Has to go to {0}.

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award {0} the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

{0}_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

{0}_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

{0}_HAPPY: There are worse titles to have.

{0} smiles at {1}

Gotta be {0}

PLAYER_HAPPY: Has to be {0}.

{0}_FLIRTY: Is that wishful thinking, {1}?

PLAYER_FLIRTY: If I was up for it you’d marry me in a heartbeat.

{0}_FLIRTY: Loving the confidence, it’s a good look on you.

PLAYER_FLIRTY: Oh I know.

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award {0} the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

{0}_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

{0}_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

{0}_HAPPY: It’s a nice legacy.

It’s clearly Uma

PLAYER_HAPPY: Has to be Uma!

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award Uma the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

UMA_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

UMA_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

UMA_HAPPY: There are worse titles to have.

UMA_HAPPY: But don’t start measuring for a suit just yet, {0}.

Has to be Travis

PLAYER_HAPPY: Got to be Travis!

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award Travis the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

TRAVIS_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

TRAVIS_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

TRAVIS_HAPPY: There are worse titles to have.

I vote {0}

PLAYER_HAPPY: It’s definitely {0}.

PLAYER_HAPPY: If there are no objections can we award {0} the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

{0}_HAPPY: And I’ll happily take it.

{0}_HAPPY: I don’t mind being the Islander most likely to propose.

{0}_IDLE: But don’t start measuring for a suit just yet, {1}.

{0} smiles at {1}

I’m voting for me

PLAYER_HAPPY: It’s me, I’m most likely to propose first.

{0}_FLIRTY: I better decide what dress I’m wearing.

PLAYER_FLIRTY: And who said I’m proposing to you?

{0}_HAPPY: Ow, my ego!

PLAYER_FLIRTY: You love the banter really.

{0}_FLIRTY: If you’re saying it, I’m enjoying it, that’s a given.

UMA_FLIRTY: Alright you two, take a breather.

UMA_FLIRTY: If there are no objections can we award {0} the title?

The others cheer in agreement.

Uma’s phone pings.

UMA_HAPPY: Oooh, what will it be this time?

Uma reads the next text.

LITEXT: Which Islander is most likely to go off the grid?

PLAYER_HAPPY: Hmm, what are we thinking?

{0}_HAPPY: Has to be either {1} or {2}.

The others nod in agreement.

{0}_HAPPY: I think it’s {1}.

{0}_HAPPY: I could see a phone getting thrown into the ocean.

{0}_HAPPY: Bit dramatic, when I could just leave it at home.

VICKY_HAPPY: Has to be either {0} or {1}.

The others nod in agreement.

{0}_HAPPY: I think it’s {1}.

{0}_HAPPY: I could see a phone getting thrown into the ocean.

{0}_HAPPY: Bit dramatic, I’d probably just leave it at home.

{0}_HAPPY: I know for a fact it couldn’t be me though, I need WIFI.

VICKY_HAPPY: We can only choose one person. Who should it be, {0}?

{0}

PLAYER_HAPPY: Most likely to go off grid is, {0}.

{0}_HAPPY: I agree with that decision.

{0}_HAPPY: I’d be down to go off grid.

{0}_HAPPY: I’d find a picturesque lake house or something and just paint.

VICKY_HAPPY: I assume you’d be shirtless the whole time?

{0}_HAPPY: Of course, that’s when I do my best work.

VICKY_HAPPY: You're like a character from a romance novel.

{0}_HAPPY: I’ll take that as a compliment.

{0}_HAPPY: I really think it would be nice.

{0}_HAPPY: Going off grid sounds cool, I’d do some climbing, some hiking. I’d go full adventure mode.

VICKY_EMBARRASSED: Erm, surely you’d want to be on the grid if you’re climbing up mountains and hiking.

VICKY_EMBARRASSED: What if you get lost!

{0}_HAPPY: I’ll bring you so one of us has a phone on, just in case.

VICKY_HAPPY: Problem solved, I guess.

{0}

PLAYER_HAPPY: Most likely to go off grid is, {0}.

{0}_HAPPY: Can’t lie, I agree with that decision.

{0}_HAPPY: I could see myself going off grid.

{0}_HAPPY: Taking a break from constantly updating my socials could be nice.

UMA_HAPPY: It wouldn’t work for me, my brand requires on grid activity.

{0}_HAPPY: I’ll take the title, but I think I’m the wrong choice.

{0}_EMBARRASSED: I don’t see myself going off grid.

{0}_EMBARRASSED: I’d miss my mum too much.

UMA_HAPPY: That’s so cute.

{0}

PLAYER_HAPPY: Most likely to go off grid is, {0}.

{0}_HAPPY: Can’t lie, I agree with that decision.

{0}_HAPPY: I could see myself going off grid.

{0}_HAPPY: Taking a break from constantly updating my socials could be nice.

UMA_HAPPY: It wouldn’t work for me, my brand requires on grid activity.

{0}_HAPPY: I agree with that decision.

{0}_HAPPY: I could see myself going off grid, why not.

{0}_HAPPY: Feels like it goes hand in hand with scuba diving anyway.

UMA_HAPPY: It really wouldn’t work for me, my brand requires on grid activity.

{0}_HAPPY: I’ll take the title, but I think I’m the wrong choice.

{0}_EMBARRASSED: I don’t see myself going off grid.

{0}_EMBARRASSED: I’d miss my mum too much.

{0}_HAPPY: That’s so cute.

{0}_HAPPY: I mean, I’ll take the title, but I think I’m the wrong choice.

{0}_IDLE: I really don’t know that I could.

{0}_IDLE: I wouldn’t want to risk losing connections with family and friends.

VICKY_IDLE: I get that, there’s no way I couldn’t be in touch with my sister.

{0}_HAPPY: Going off grid sounds cool.

{0}_HAPPY: I’d do some climbing, some hiking. I’d go full adventure mode.

{0}_EMBARRASSED: Erm, surely you’d want to be on the grid if you’re climbing up mountains and hiking?

{0}_EMBARRASSED: What if you get lost!

{0}_HAPPY: I’ll just bring you and you can keep your phone on, just in case.

{0}_HAPPY: Problem solved, I guess.

UMA_HAPPY: I wonder if we can nail the next one straight away?

UMA_EMBARRASSED: We’ve had some differing opinions so far.

PLAYER_HAPPY: We can’t agree on everything.

VICKY_HAPPY: Very true, {0}.

Your phone pings. You read out the text.

LITEXT: Which Islander is most likely to have more clothes than their partner?

LITEXT: Which Islander is most likely to win an award for best DIY?

LITEXT: Which Islander is most likely to fall in love on the first date?

LITEXT: Which Islander is most likely to win the award for most mysterious person in the villa?

LITEXT: Which Islander is most likely to give most of their earnings to charity?

LITEXT: Which Islander is most likely to win the award for most electric energy?

LITEXT: Which Islander is most likely to save the day?

LITEXT: Which Islander is most likely to make gifts for their partner?

PLAYER_HAPPY: Any initial guesses?

UMA_HAPPY: Hmm, could it be {0}? Maybe?

UMA_HAPPY: What do you think, {0}?

Of course it’s {0}!

PLAYER_HAPPY: There was never any other option!

PLAYER_HAPPY: {0}, you are the...

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to have more clothes than their partner.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to win an award for best DIY.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to fall in love on the first date.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to win the award for most mysterious person in the villa.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to give most of their earnings to charity.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to win the award for most electric energy.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to save the day.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to make gifts for their partner.

{0}_HAPPY: I’m honoured, {1} and I love that you know me so well.

What do you think, {0}?

PLAYER_HAPPY: Why don’t you tell us, {0}?

PLAYER_HAPPY: Does that sound like you?

{0}_HAPPY: I don’t think that’s the way the game should be played…

{0}_HAPPY: But I want the title, so I’ll go with the rule break. It’s me!

PLAYER_HAPPY: Great! Then you are the…

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to have more clothes than their partner.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to win an award for best DIY.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to fall in love on the first date.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to win the award for most mysterious person in the villa.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to give most of their earnings to charity.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to win the award for most electric energy.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to save the day.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Islander most likely to make gifts for their partner.

{0}_HAPPY: I’m honoured.

PLAYER_HAPPY: What do you think is coming next?

{0}_HAPPY: Something funny I bet.

{0}’s phone pings. He reads the text quietly to himself first.

{0}_HAPPY: Ha! That’s a good one.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Care to share with the group?

LITEXT: Which couple is most likely to go on holiday and not leave the hotel room?

{0} raises his eyebrows suggestively.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Ok, we get it!

{0}_HAPPY: Just making sure.

PLAYER_FLIRTY: I know who should get this one.

{0}_FLIRTY: If you’re that confident we’ll go with your instinct, {1}.

Vicky and {0}

PLAYER_FLIRTY: It’s an easy pick, {0} and Vicky.

VICKY_FLIRTY: I’m not surprised, I do have sexual energy just flying off me.

{0}_FLIRTY: I will happily take on that title.

Uma and {0}

PLAYER_FLIRTY: It’s an easy pick, Uma and {0}.

UMA_FLIRTY: I’m not surprised, I do have sexual energy just flying off me.

{0}_FLIRTY: I will happily take on that title.

{0} and {1}

PLAYER_FLIRTY: It’s an easy pick, {0} and {1}.

{0}_FLIRTY: I’m not surprised, I do have sexual energy just flying off me.

{0}_FLIRTY: I will happily take on that title.

Me and {0}

PLAYER_FLIRTY: It’s the obvious choice, me and {0}.

{0}_FLIRTY: I was hoping you’d say that, {1}.

{0}_FLIRTY: I will happily take on that title.

{0}_FLIRTY: And hope to prove it true.

{0} winks at you.

Bonnie and Travis

PLAYER_FLIRTY: It has to go to Bonnie and Travis.

BONNIE_EMBARRASSED: Erm…

TRAVIS_EMBARRASSED: Wasn’t expecting that to be honest.

{0}_SURPRISED: You’re not the only one.

UMA_FLIRTY: I’d be absolutely lying if I said I didn’t wish that title was mine.

UMA_FLIRTY: But I’ll move on and pretend I have it anyway.

{0}_FLIRTY: I’d be absolutely lying if I said I didn’t wish that title was mine.

{0}_FLIRTY: But I’ll move on and pretend I have it anyway.

{0}’s phone pings.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Let’s hear it.

LITEXT: Which Islander is most likely to win the award for loudest snorer?

UMA_FLIRTY: If you know what’s good for you, nobody will say my name.

{0}_HAPPY: I’m pleading the fifth on this one.

BONNIE_HAPPY: Pleading the fifth? You must agree with me then.

BONNIE_HAPPY: {0} is the loudest snorer, no question.

{0}_HAPPY: Pleading the fifth? You must agree with me then.

{0}_HAPPY: {1} is the loudest snorer, no question.

Own the snore

PLAYER_HAPPY: When I sleep on my back I snore, so sue me!

PLAYER_HAPPY: And I’ve been told my snores are soothing actually.

{0}_HAPPY: That’s because you’re gorgeous, {1}.

Clapback at {0}

PLAYER_IDLE: I might snore.

PLAYER_IDLE: But that’s not as bad as the sounds and smells that come out of you at night.

{0}_SURPRISED: I thought I’d been getting away with it this whole time.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Nope!

Clapback at Bonnie

PLAYER_IDLE: I might snore.

PLAYER_IDLE: But that’s not as bad as the sounds and smells that come out of you at night.

BONNIE_SURPRISED: I thought I’d been getting away with it this whole time.

PLAYER_HAPPY: Nope!

Deny all claims!

PLAYER_HAPPY: I don’t know what you heard, but it didn’t come from me.

BONNIE_HAPPY: Cleary de-nile isn’t just a river in Egypt…

{0}_HAPPY: Cleary de-nile isn’t just a river in Egypt…

PLAYER_HAPPY: I do not snore!

BONNIE_HAPPY: I respect you owning it, {0}.

BONNIE_HAPPY: And I don’t hear any disagreements so…

BONNIE_HAPPY: Well, you might not be accepting of the facts.

BONNIE_HAPPY: But I’m not hearing any disagreements from anyone else, so…

BONNIE_HAPPY: I’m announcing {0} as the Islander most likely to win the award for loudest snorer!

{0}_HAPPY: I respect you owning it, {1}.

{0}_HAPPY: And I don’t hear any disagreements so...

{0}_HAPPY: Well, you might not be accepting of the facts.

{0}_HAPPY: But I’m not hearing any disagreements from anyone else, so...

{0}_HAPPY: I’m announcing {1} as the Islander most likely to win the award for loudest snorer!

You open your mouth to respond to your win but then…

Your phone pings and you read the text out.

LITEXT: Islanders, it’s time to crown your Prom King and Queen. {0}TheFairestOfThemAll {1}BowDown

LITEXT: Islanders, it’s time to crown your Prom King and Queen or Prom Queen and Queen. {0}TheFairestOfThemAll {1}BowDown

[queen--kenobi]

So here's how it goes:

Obviously they have to have a tourney for the big wedding for the Realm even though Aemond and Elayna are already married but ssssshhhhh no they aren't what are you talking about haha seriously who told you that

Tymon enters said tourney. Elayna freaks because she knows Tymon will ask for her favor, and like. She can't say no anyway but it's doubly rude to say no since, you know, she literally ran away with Aemond three days before she was supposed to marry Tymon

In comes a solution to the problem: Daemon

Daemon was planning on asking for Elayna's favor anyway just because he's a shit stirrer. That's legit the only reason he's at the wedding in the first place is to start shit. So Daemon sees Elayna freaking and sees Aemond giving these nasty fucking looks to Tymon. And Daemon hatches a plan

First, he asks for Elayna's favor. Okay, we've done a half stir of the pot. Ruffled a few feathers but that's not good enough. No no no. Daemon goes to whomever makes the brackets and talks to them. He also goes and talks to several other people in the tourney and has it set up just right

Tymon does real well, to the point it looks like he might win. Aemond and Elayna are both steadily getting more and more agitated because holy fuck Tymon cannot win the tournament during their marriage festivities he just can't Aemond will go down there and kill Tymon if that's what it takes

Daemon is obviously killing it. He's not worried at all

The final round of the tourney is Daemon vs Tymon. Everyone is watching with baited breath because a) holy fuck what if Tymon does win and b) everyone remembers Daemon got into a fucking fight with Ser Criston because he got beat. So people are waiting to see what happens

It's dead silent as they get into position

They get the signal. They start. And first time around, neither gets knocked off. Daemon does nearly get a hit in

Second time, Tymon actually manages to hit Daemon in the arm. Doesn't knock him off his horse, though. And when they turn around, Tymon knows he fucked up just by the look on Daemon's face

This time, Daemon not only manages to knock Tymon off his horse but also legit stabs Tymon in his shoulder. Like an inch or two higher, and he would have hit Tymon in the neck

It's bad. It's brutal. The crowd goes wild. Elayna covers her face as she laughs with relief while Aemond outright smirks

Have I told y'all how Tymon ends up getting embarrassed at the tourney for Aemond and Elayna's wedding

[chrishoughton]

I don't know who needs to hear this but Hannah Ayubi is a great person and very talented artist.

We worked together on Harvey Beaks and I've always been impressed by her sense of humor and individuality. If you're unaware of the "controversy" (lol), basically she drew a drawing featuring two fictional characters that made a bunch of randos on twitter pretend to clutch their imaginary pearls. They keep bringing up the drawing, hoping to get her fired or make her life more difficult somehow (it won't work. She's done nothing wrong and is very talented). They are now accusing her of all sorts of horrible things based on nothing other than a stupid drawing. These people are bullies and social media is full of em.

This is exactly the type of pointless wasted energy that made me delete all of my social media. Social media is messed up and it's ruining the way people view each other. No longer is a person a complicated mix of virtues and flaws. Nope. You're either unproblematic or problematic.

To make matters worse, it's become a sport to slap one of these two labels onto each other. Have you found someone online who might be... PROBLEMATIC? Quick! Expose them before anyone else does so that you can get internet points! You're a vigilanty by God, and we're counting on you to keep the everyone Pure and Good! Jeesh... It's a game where everyone loses. One wrong move? You're cancelled baybee!! Pack your shit and go live in a cave! The tribe has spoken! 🙄 (And no, I'm not talking about the Weinsteins or the Cosbys of the world. That was 2016, it's 2020 now and I think the conversation has spun out of control)

Even in typing this, I risk someone trying to twist my words around to stir the pot. You have every right to be a shit-stirrer, but at the end of the day, all you have is a pot of shit.

The animation fanbase online is weird. I'm out. I want no part in it. I like talking to you folks here on tumblr. Y'all are funny and strange and ask me all types of interesting questions. I love that! It really makes my day even when I can't answer everyone. But I feel I need to say something about what Hannah's going through. I don't like hearing strangers online talk about a pal of mine in such a viscous way. (I guess it's my own damn fault for spying on the "Big City Greens" tag on Twitter! If I didn't look, I wouldn't have known. This stuff almost always lives and dies completely online.)

I don't like bullies. I was bullied quite a bit growing up and you know what I learned happens after you get beat up? Nothing. That's where the bully's plan ends. Bullies aren't very forward thinking. After a bully rings your bell, you stand up and get back to doing what you were doing. The bully wants you to stop and cancel your plans. The bully wants to control you because control is all a bully has.

The worst thing that social media has done for bullies is trick them into thinking they're NOT bullies. They actually seem to think they some sort of authority (sadly they do- companies often listen to Twitter). Some bullies even think they're sheriff's. There's lot of "sheriffs" online with their guns drawn, demanding "justice." Well I demand you go outside and soak your head.

Personally, I no longer share many of my personal drawings online. Theres no upside for me, only risk. I work in children's entertainment but I'm an adult and in my free time, I'll draw whatever I damn well please. I save my money, I have a relentlessness work ethic, and I don't like being told what to do. So do your worst haha.

I feel sorry for artists just starting out. If I was 18, I'd feel very compelled to be on social media sharing my work and trying to get noticed. But the "rules" to this game seem to be getting harder and harder. We've all known for years that we should all be careful with what we share online. But the "sheriffs" seem to be growing in numbers. They want to make sure we all play by their rules and I think that's dangerous. We're all learning, stumbling, and struggling. That's life!

Bullies will never be satisfied. Like seagulls on the beach... Do not feed them!

[strawberrymilkgeorge]

OK OK OK. I was just re-reading the newest chapter (as one does) and I was just think about it all.

Like so Dream bow knows what Bug looks like (fuck yes let's gooooo) but I really want to see Karl's reaction to this whether it be from Bug or Dream accidentally spilling that he knows what she looks like. Bc Karl is going to be shocked and excited (at least in my opinion).

Also in the text segment when Bug says something along the lines of "tell me straight up" and Dream replies "fine I will" has me freaking out bc mans needs to spell it out for poor Bug.

But I love Naomi and her pot-stirring. Calling y/n Dreams Bug... heck yes.

Anyways I love your writing and I cant wait for next week!!

omg glad you like it!! it makes me happy to know people like parts so much you'll reread them omg that's so cute

wait wait okay I already have a plan and it involves not really telling anyone that he knows and then possibly definitely jealous dream spilling his knowledge on stream–

and Karl is NUMBER ONE dreamsy shipper he'll probably pass away when he finds out

heheh glad you caught the "fine I will" bc heheheh

Naomi is a POT STIRRER she just loves seeing people panic <3

[spiridakos]

bang, bang

falliam frenzy week two: “I don’t know why I’m crying.” // “You can’t die. Please don’t die.”

“We need to talk about last night.”

His voice echoes in their kitchen as soon she enters the vast, brightly lit space. The sun is shining far too much for her liking this morning, radiant and glowing, her fingers rubbing at her temple to try to calm the headache that won’t seem to quit, a reminder of all the poor decisions she made last night haunting her every time the pressure in her head got just a little worse.

Fallon wanders herself to the fresh pot of coffee he’d already brewed, pouring herself a mug of the (still) steaming hot liquid. She mixes in the minuscule amount of sugar she takes and splashes a bit of cream in the ceramic cup, stirring it with one of the wooden stirrers set near the machine. She wanders back over to the kitchen island, sitting herself at one of the bar stools.

“There’s nothing to talk about.”

“I would argue that getting called in the middle of the night by your mother because you showed up at her place absolutely hammered after not answering my calls for hours is something to talk about.”

“I don’t want to do this right now,” she says, pushing the white mug up to her lips to take the first sip of her morning coffee, instant relief when the steaming liquid coats her throat. “I have a killer headache, so please, Liam, not now.”

“Well, that’s too bad,” he says, leaning forward against the opposite side of their kitchen island, watching her with rapt attention. “Cause this conversation is no longer up for debate anymore.”

She pushes herself up from her seat, ignoring his words, turning herself in the direction of the stairs with every intent of crawling back into their bed for the rest of the day. “I’m not talking about this right now.”

She hears him follow behind her, before his hand captures her wrist lightly, always lightly, before he spins her around so she’s facing him again; she doesn’t like the tears that are threatening to fall from her eyes already. She especially doesn’t like the look that he’s giving her when she catches his eyes; it’s full of disappointment and sadness and god, she can see just how terrified he was for her, how that fear is hiding behind his eyes even if he’s trying his dammed hardest not to show it. 

“No one could find you, Fallon,” he squeezes the words between his teeth. “You weren’t answering calls or texts from anyone all night.”

“My phone was dead!”

She pushes his hand off her and she doesn’t really even comprehend why she does it, or why she’s getting so defensive with him over the whole thing. Especially when he was right, he had every right to be angry with her right now. She did mess up, she just wasn’t ready to admit that to him yet; or even to herself.

“Fallon, I don’t really care if your phone died. That isn’t the point.” His words come out in such frustration and she hates it. All she’s ever wanted was for him to be happy, for him to be proud of her. And right now, he’s anything but. “This reaching for the bottle coping mechanism you’ve gotten used to has got to stop.”

“Liam.” She hates how her words come out in a small whisper, almost a cry; unable to think of anything else to fight back with at his words.  

“I wouldn’t have been as worried if I didn’t just know that the second you slammed our front door last night,” he says. “That you were going to find yourself at bar drinking away your feelings and trying to numb it all.”

“It’s not that serious, Liam.”

“I’m terrified that one day I’m going to pick up that phone and hear news that’s much worse than the news I got last night, Fallon,” he clenches his teeth when he says it, his eyes are watering and she swears she catches a tear escape out of the corner of his eye. “I’m afraid one day I’m going to find out you’re not coming home to me anymore.”

“That’t stupid, Liam,” she scoffs, but she turns her head away from him nonetheless so he can’t see the pain that she just knows is etching its way on to her face. “I was just out having a good time with Sam.”

“Having a good time with Sam because you were pissed off at me yesterday.” He reiterates that fact again, leaving no indication he was leaving this topic alone anytime soon. “That’s the only reason you reached for the bottle.”

“No, it’s not!”

“Well, then, by all means,” he opens his hands out to her, giving her the floor to make her case. “Tell me why you went out and got yourself drunk last night and ended up on your mother’s porch at 4am.”

“I’m not doing this right now,” she turns her body around and starts her trek up their staircase. “I’m done with this conversation!”

//

She storms in to La Mirage angrily, high heels clicking against the tiled floor with every heavy footstep she takes forward into the lobby. She spots Sam behind the bar and makes her way towards him, sitting down at one of the empty stools in front of him in a huff.

He eyes her up and down, his hands placed up against the bar top before finally asking, “What’s wrong with you?”

“Liam and I got into a fight,” she sighs loudly, the stress of her morning finally catching up to her, despite her best efforts to forget the whole last two days entirely. 

“Oh, god. Again?” Sam’s eyes roll far back as soon as the words leave her lips. “What are you two fighting about now? What color to paint the kitchen?”

Her eyes widen a bit at his questions, taken aback slightly. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“That you two fight over a lot of stupid things,” he says, picking up a bottle of clear liquor and pouring a shot out into the glass in front of him before he slides it off to the guest a few seats down from her. “And it’s not even really fights. It’s just that you’re too stubborn to talk things out before storming off in a huff when you don’t get your way.”

“Okay, first of all, I’m offended,” she says, holding up one finger on her left hand, her shiny peach colored diamond shining from the lights above her, tugging at her heart just slightly when she thinks of him. “And, two, no, it’s not over paint colors. It’s actually a lot worse this time.”

“Okay, so what happened then?”

She sighs, “Liam thinks I depend on alcohol too much.”

He waits for her to continue, but when she doesn’t she hears, “Okay, and…”

Her shoulders sink at his words. “Don’t tell me you agree with him.”

“He’s not exactly…wrong with his worries, Fallon.”

Her defensive side comes out straight away, as it so usually does: “Why are you taking his side?”

“I’m not taking his side, I’m just saying the only reason you asked to go out for drinks yesterday was because Liam was pissing you off and you wanted to forget about it.”

And that’s exactly when it clicks in her head that a certain someone had already talked to Sam about the events that transpired earlier that morning before she’d even arrived at the hotel.

“He called you,” she says. 

“He may have given me a heads up that you’d show up asking for a drink.”

“Well?” She snaps her fingers twice in a row, waiting for him to pick up an empty glass for her. “Shot of whiskey would be great right about now.”

“I’m not condoning your behavior any longer,” he says handing her a tall glass of water. “You can have water.”

“You’re supposed to be my friend, Sam!” She looks at the class of clear liquid that was set in front of her, unamused with Sam’s actions and Liam’s actions, for that matter, for calling Sam in the first place. “I could just go to another bar, you know! Why won’t you just let me—”

She jumps back when she hears a gun shoot off in the short distance behind her six times in a row, forcing her to turn around and see several large men (she assumes) wearing all black clothing with black face masks covering everywhere against their faces but their eyes. She holds her hands over her ears to block out the loud gunshots ringing in her ears. 

She hops off her stool and runs behind the bar to stand by Sam, stopping in her tracks when she hears, “Everybody stay where you are!”

She freezes when she leader of the pack walks forward shouting at everyone, gun pointing off so carelessly in all directions, he takes no discretion to who he points it at and she worries he’ll actually pull the trigger at anyone of them there. 

“This is a robbery. Stay where you are and cooperate with us and it will all be over with in five minutes.”

All of the guys wander around the room, each of them appearing to scout out the area among the dozens of them they’ve currently trapped in the La Mirage lobby. She watches on eagerly when she notices Sams’ employee Hailee behind the check-in desk, leaning her hand underneath the table to push the panic button Sam had hidden under there for these exact circumstances. He’d told her when he installed it that he most likely wouldn’t need it, but on the off chance he would, he was putting it in regardless.

She silently thanks him when she sees the young blondes thumb slip under the desk, thinking the police were two seconds away from behind notified of the situation. 

“Excuse me,” the lead mans’ gun points off in Hailee’s direction. “Are you aiming to be employee of the month or something?”

Her hands slip out, holding up both her hands so he could see them in front of her.

“Everyone on my staff, do as they say,” Sam says into the open space, filled with tension and terror. “Just….do what they tell you.”

//

Liam was finding it hard focusing on just about anything. 

He tried to work on his latest book, tried to put some words to paper, but the only thing on his mind was Fallon and if she was off numbing the pain and memories of their morning argument, like she always seemed to do when something wasn’t exactly in line with how she wanted it to go. 

He’d only managed to write a couple hundred words when he feels his phone vibrating in his pocket, everything inside him hoping it was Fallon, ready to talk things out rationally so they could both figure out this problem together, like the always did. He pulls it out slowly only to see Blake Carrington’s name across his screen, who was the last person he expected to be calling him now, or ever if he was being honest. They’d barely even spoken in the time he’d been with Fallon, and even then, Fallon was barely on speaking terms with her own father right now.

Which only led him to one conclusion - Blake Carrington needed something. 

Or Fallon was drunk again and ended up stuck on Carrington Manor today for a change. 

He slides the call icon to the right on his screen, but before he has the chance to say hello, he hears his voice on the receiving end, “Liam.”

“Blake,” he says, irritation already building in his tone. “Look, what do you want? I don’t really have time to help you with whatever trouble you’ve got yourself…”

“Would you shut up and listen to me for a minute? It’s Fallon.”

“Fallon?” That stops him in his tracks and sends his mind flying in a million different direction. Because he immediately can tell he’s on edge. Fallon’s not drunk and stuck at the manor - somethings wrong. “What about Fallon?”

“Look, Liam,” the older man starts slowly, which only puts him more on edge. “I need you to promise me you’re not going to to do anything stupid when I tell you.”

“You’re scaring me,” he says, shifting the phone from his left hand to his right. “Please just tell me what’s going on.”

“There’s a hostage situation going on at Sam’s hotel,” Blake says. 

He swears he feels his heart drop out of his chest, because he just knows that’s exactly where Fallon darted off to. “What?”

“I don’t know all the details yet, but some guys in black masks with guns stormed the lobby and won’t let anyone in or out.”

He’s afraid for the answer he might get from the question he doesn’t know if he should ask, but he asks anyways, “Is she okay? She’s okay, right?”

He doesn’t like the way Blake pauses after his question, unsure, uncertainty floating in the silence between them. “I’m not sure yet. Just…just meet me at the hotel.”

He slams his laptop shut, reaching for his keys on the counter and their early morning starting to replay in his head over and over and over again. The way they exchanged words, they way things didn’t end well when she took off angrily this morning, leaving him behind to worry about what she’d do next to herself. 

It all seemed so irrational now. 

“You can’t die.” He slides his key into the ignition, revving the engine up before he starts to reverse the black SUV out of the driveway. “Please don’t die.”

//

She watches at Sam, as looks on in horror as the windows and doors to his hotel are spray painted with dark black paint, before the crew of guys move on to covering up the security cameras next, blocking out any vision to authorities who were trying to get in to see the security footage.

“Look, you can take anything you want to,” Sam speaks up on the right of her, his voice quiet and completely on edge, his tone laced with all kinds of anxieties that she’s feeling all the same. 

“I intend to, starting with phones, tablets and laptops,” the lead man says as he pulls out a folded brown sack from pocket; small, but probably enough to get what he needed from everyone in this lobby, she figures. 

She hates how when she walked in to La Mirage that morning, the only thing she was thinking about was forgetting her fight with Liam from their morning earlier today, and now the only thing she could think of was Liam and how she wouldn’t be able to live with herself if that was how they left things. Because if that really was their last conversation together and she didn’t make it out of this thing alive…

“So, what are we supposed to call you? We don’t even know your name.”

It’s Sam who speaks up besides her, putting on his best brave face as far as she can tell. He keeps his eyes zoned in on the man picking up cell phones around the room, each guest of Sam’s dropping their smart phones in the brown bag before sinking back in fear against themselves. 

“A great question. You, young man, can call me One, this here,” he points to the two men in the black uniform besides him. “Is two and three. You seem like a smart man, surely you can figure the rest out.”

When he turns his back on her side of the room, she uses it as her chance to zip her purse open quietly and sneak her phone into her bra; out of site and out of mind from where they’d probably even think to look for a cellular device. But before she knows it, he’s in front of her and Sam, Sam dropping his iPhone and work tablet into the sack that’s held out in front of him. 

But then One turns to her as he holds the bag out for her. “Well?”

“I don’t have one, it’s up in my room,” she says quietly.” “I left it up in my room.”

He doesn’t question it, thankfully, and when he slips by them and moves to the next group of people besides them, she sinks quietly to the floor and slips the phone out of her bra discreetly, dialing the number she’d become all too familiar with over the last few years. 

//

He takes his last few struts up to the Carringtons’ who are already stood a far distance from the hotel, slightly out of breath from the distance he had to run. The surrounding streets were already blocked off, so he parked where he could before starting to run towards the hotel. 

“What the hell is going on?”

“Liam,” Blake says when he notices his presence next to him. “No one knows, okay?”

“Well, can’t they figure it out faster?” Liam runs his hand through his hair, an anxious habit,  frustrated and terrified all at the same time. “My fiancèe is in there!”

“They know that, Liam,” Blake spins in his direction; he can see the anger and panic in the older mans face, but he’s doing a decent job of keep it together so far, he’s not erupting in total rage at authority figures yet, which Liam counts as a success. “There’s probably a a few dozen people in there right now. It’s not just Fallon, okay?”

“Well, they should work faster."

It’s Cristal’s hand comes to settle up on his upper arm in a reassuring gesture while she says, “The authorities are doing what they can, okay?”

“Well,” he says breathing deeply, all of the worst outcomes scanning through his head on repeat. “Can’t they cut in to the CCTV he’s got in there?”

“They’ve tried, Liam,” Blake says through gritted teeth. “Whoever is in there spray-painted the cameras black. We can’t see anything.”

He paces back and forth a few moments, watching police meet in small bundles, trying to figure out what move to make next, when he sees her name on the screen of his iPhone, taking him by complete surprise. He panics slightly when he sees it, because it couldn’t be…could it? He figures he must be imagining it, there’s no way those guys were letting her make a phone call….

He slides to accept the call regardless. 

“Fal?”

Her voice meets his immediately, panic and distress floating all throughout her tone. “Liam.”

“Hey, hey, hey,” he hums to her, hoping he could calm down some of the terror she’s feeling. “Talk to me, babe. What’s going on?”

“There’s a bunch of guys in black masks with guns,” her voice is so soft, he’s not even sure if he could classify it as a whisper. “I’m so scared, Liam.”

“Deep breaths, baby. Deep breaths,” his voice is so calm when he hears it echo back at him; he’s not sure how when he’s trying to talk his own self off a ledge. But for her, he remembers: be calm for her. “I’m right here, okay?”

“I’m sorry, Liam,” her words stutter out, still as soft as when she first spoke. “I…I overreacted this morning and I’m sorry. You’re right, I do have a problem and I promise I’m going to get better.”

“I’m sorry, too, babe,” he smiles with his words, because despite this all he’s just happy to hear her voice; he doesn’t even care about this morning anymore, that was long forgotten the minute he hung up his call with Blake. “I’m sorry I raise my voice. I’m sorry if I didn’t handle it correctly. I’m just so worried about you. I’ve seen my family go down that path and I don’t want that for you.”

“I know, Liam.” He doesn’t like the edge in her voice, the tension, the absolute terror he can just sense without even looking at her. “I know.”

“I love you, so much, Fallon,” he mutters quietly. “You know that right?” 

“Yeah,” she replies, softer in tone than before, which he didn’t think was even possible. 

“I’m right out in the front and I’m gonna get you out of there, okay?”

“Please hurry.”

“Hey!” Liam hears the grunted, muffled voice, a short distance behind her, but when it speaks up again, it’s closer and instantly put him right back on edge. “I thought you told me you didn’t have a phone!”

“I love you, Liam.”

And then there’s silence, their connection cut off, those three small beeps indicating she’d ended the call leaving him standing absolutely still on the sidewalk. He knows he’ll forever be haunted by the sound of her voice in her last four words, the way that it sounded so final, so eerily like a goodbye. He runs his hand through his hair, panic running deep inside him, a tightness clutching at his chest as her words echoed in his mind over and over and over again. 

And that’s when he hears the gunshot go off, the vibration echoing in the streets and the loud bang ringing loudly in his ears.

[beloved-child-of-the-house]

My dear friend Abelard @sincerelywrong turned 25 today!!! Happy birthday my dearest frog <3 Here’s a little ficlet I wrote in celebration with hair dye and self acceptance and best friendship. 

“Are you sure about this, Steven?” Connie snapped on her plastic gloves with relish, but still looked a little concerned at Steven in his bathroom mirror.

“Sure I’m sure!” Steven adjusted his makeshift smock. “It’s just hair anyway. It grows back if it comes out looking weird. Besides I trust you!” They smiled at each other’s reflections in the mirror. 

“I’m just reading the directions on the box,” said Connie, stirring the little jar of hair color. “I don’t have like. Expertise or anything.” 

“Well, I trust you to follow the directions! Plus I really don’t think being a platinum blonde works for me, so I’m ready to be something else now.” 

“That makes sense,” Connie still paused, spreader stick in hand and hovering over Steven’s curls. “Just. Are you sure you want. Pink hair?”

“Because I’ll look like my mom?”

“Well. Yeah.” 

Steven smiled and shrugged, “I already look like her. We have the same nose. She’s my mom.” Connie still looked a little skeptical. “I know I used to be really scared of being like my mom, but. She’s my mom. I am like her. It’s okay. I’m also like me. There’s a lot we have in common and a lot we don’t. I don’t have to be nothing like her to still be me.” 

“Okay,” Connie started to apply the color, “I just wanted to check in.”

“Thanks,” Steven raised his phone to take a picture of them in the mirror as Connie covered his hair in the glop. “Plus pink is my favorite color; I’m gonna look so pretty!”

“You really will!” Connie tried to hug Steven and avoid contact with the hair glop simultaneously but since she couldn’t, she kissed him on the cheek instead, and they both giggled. “I wonder if the dye will show on Stevonnie.”

“I hope so! Stevonnie would be so cute with pink hair.” 

“They would!” Connie finished applying the dye and set the dye pot and stirrer aside and peeled off the gloves. 

“All done? How long does it have to stay on?”

Connie checked the box, “Twenty to thirty minutes but no more than forty five.”

“Okay!” Steven set an alarm on his phone and stood up. “I think Garnet and Amethyst are watching tv in the living room. Wanna go hang out with them? Or we could play video games in my room. Or get a snack? My dad and I just went to the store, so we have a ton of snacks.” 

Connie’s mind seemed to have wandered, “Hey Steven?” 

“Yeah?” Steven sat down again. 

“It’s um. I just. It seems like you’re already um.” She sniffled a little, “I’m glad you’re still here.”

Steven smiled a big wet smile and wiped away a tear, “Me too. Thanks for helping me. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” 

“Jam buds forever, right?” Connie held her arms out for a hug. 

Steven stepped into them and hugged her tight, “Jam buds forever.”

[ticktockmyclockworkhart]

:D Finally someone else who likes the Monokubs!! Queation: do you have any headcannons for the kubs?

Oh boy do I ever!!! Because no character, no matter how minor, is safe from my constant need to analyze their story and put my headcanons on it even if they’re fuckin homicidal little teddies 

As an umbrella thing I personally think the Monokubs operate differently from Monokuma. Where Monokuma requires the presence of the mastermind to be active because he needs to be controlled (Shirokuma and Kurokuma also apply here) I think the Kubs operate like Usami does, having actual programmed autonomous AI, hence why they were still active during the time in chapter 1 that Monokuma was “killed”, and therefore absent for a period of time. They have little programmed minds of their own and don’t need the mastermind’s input to do stuff. Now, on to the individual Kubs (this is largely just headcanons on their relationships with one another as a family or little things I think the Kubs do on their spare time like Monodam mentions in a Monodam Theater segment)

Monokid

- nowhere in his programming was he given the ability or knowledge to control his emotions, specifically regulate reactions, hence why he gets loud and excited or screams at the most minor of provocations

- can’t actually play the guitar he can just strum it in an attempt at recreating a rhythm

- of the small rooms the Kubs and Monokuma were given in the top attic-like floor of the academy, his is by far the messiest, one window is totally smashed and almost all of his furniture is broken in some way

- probably best that the Kubs never really wander the academy unless called because if he saw a murder happen literally the entire academy would know what was going on because he would SCREAM 

- honey isn’t actually like an alcoholic beverage to bears, it’s just. Just Monokid it does weird shit to 

- goes after Monophanie if Monodam isn’t available as a punching bag

- actually kind of respects and thinks Monosuke is cool (the feeling is NOT mutual)

- his best friend is probably Monotaro but they need to never be left unsupervised because they can and will level the entire campus with the pure chaotic games they play together 

- in terms of his favorite student aside from Kiibo, who is his babysitter, he is drawn to Kaede because of her musical talent and will often just... show up in her lab unannounced and watch her play the piano for an uncomfortably long time

Monodam

- Loves replicating things he sees on TV. He sees characters build a fort on a show? He’s gonna do that. Characters are hosting a slumber party on whatever he’s watching? Heck yeah sibling bonding time. Watching the Matrix? LET’S GET THE AIRSOFT GUNS FROM HARUKAWA’S LAB AND PRACTICE DODGING BULLETS, GUYS!

- Wants to wear some kind of neat accessory like his siblings

- Also wants to learn how to do yo-yo tricks but he has no fingers :(

- Monosuke organizes poker games between all the Kubs every Saturday and despite never playing poker before in his life and not really understanding the game in the slightest Monodam is insanely good at it and keeps winning

- Keeps his own living space very tidy, he gets a nice feeling of satisfaction when things look nice

- Pushed Monokid down the casino basement stairs once on “accident”

- Does all the Kubs’ grunt work

- His best friend among his siblings is probably Monophanie, they do arts and crafts stuff together and bond over their mutual preference for peace and getting along

- Of the students his favorite is Saihara, who he admires the talent of and refers to him as “detective”, often asking him random questions about secrets of the school to see if the shsl detective had already figured them out

Monosuke

- ftm transboy!! ( if you notice he shares a few physical similarities with his sister, Monophanie. Not just the eyelashes, but the white jagged eye, too, something none of the other brothers have, just Monophanie aside from him. Silly headcanon I know but you can pry it out of my cold dead hands )

- Takes no shit. Zero. None. Will cut a bitch if given the chance.

- gets overexcited about some things and accidentally will blab about info ahead of time (he SUCKS at keeping secrets)

- the Monokubs have zero need for real currency inside the academy’s walls, there’s absolutely no economy in an academy of 16 teenagers and 6 stuffed bears so why is he so obsessed with making a stable profit?? No one knows

- Hates receiving affection from his father and will peace out if he sees anything like that coming

- gets roped into a bunch of schemes his siblings come up with and won’t try and stop them or anything, he’ll just bitch nonstop about how bad of an idea this is

- actually good at organizing events like poker nights, movie nights, what have you

- his best friend among his siblings is probably Monophanie, the two have been close since they were first created 

- as for his favorite student, he hates literally everyone (his babysitter, Kiibo, included) but honestly thinks Ouma is great because of how much he stirs the pot, and Monosuke loves shit stirrers like that 

Monophanie

- soft pink shit like, everywhere. Her room is covered in pink carpet, the super plush kind that’s basically like walking on a mat of faux fur

- in addition to constantly puking if she gets really caught off guard she can have then occasional fainting spell

- waters any and all plants on campus, even if they’re weeds. If it has a flower it’s hers now and she will care for it forever

- actually requests a lot of practical things from her siblings, surprisingly, like soundproofing Monokid’s room and fortifying the walls of Monotaro’s room so his ninja stars stop busting through the other side when he throws them

- ships all of the students with each other. All of them

- the love hotel was probably her idea though she had envisioned something much more cheesy-romantic and wholesome than what her father did instead 

- loves crafts!! Especially making flower crowns and leis to cover her brothers in

- of her siblings, her best friend is probably Monodam, she thinks he’s adorable and appreciates his calmer, quiet nature compared to the rest of her weird-ass brothers 

- in terms of her favorite student, she thinks Yumeno is adorable and finds her magic so cool, she probably sneaks away from whatever important thing the Kubs are doing to watch Yumeno’s occasional shows

Monotaro

- the literal living emobiment of “I just walked into this room super excited to do something very important but now that I’m here for the life of me I can’t remember what it was”

- shirks chores and responsibilities completely unintentionally, because he just simply forgets about them and spends the rest of his day doing other pointless tasks 

- his room is a disaster and it’s a wonder how he finds what he needs in there, but he always manages to get by somehow

- loves playing computer games

- forgets he loves playing computer games

- he’s “discovered” his love for computer games about ten times now

- is convinced he’a the leader but it’s really just Monosuke and Monodam doing everything from the shadows and then Monotaro being thoroughly convinced he was actually being helpful

- his best friend is, of course, Monokid, because he’s his wildest sibling and they can go out and play rowdy, rough and high energy games together 

- while kiibo is generally liked among all the Kubs, Monotaro is by far the closest to him and loves the robot to bits, often following him around campus when he forgets what he’s supposed to be doing, because if he “follows Daddy around, he’ll figure it out eventually”

[forisobel]

REVISITING HARRY POTTER, PART ONE .  .  .

harry potter was a staple for my childhood. beit through the books or movies, i excited at the prospect of following young harry through out his adventures at hogwarts. i’ve been to the harry potter studios in london twice now and display the full collection of books and movies on my shelves, each organised delicately in order. i saw fantastic beasts in cinemas and was mildly confused before being well and truly disgusted watching the most recent crimes of grindelwald. over the past few weeks i have been troubled by one question, how did we get here?

so today we’re jumping in the way way back machine and riding it all the way to 2001, and the release of harry potter and the philosopher’s stone.

my memories of this movie going into it were about as good as my own eleventh birthday, hazy and out of reach. this had frustrated me because it wasn’t the kind of film that was sitting, collecting dust, on my shelf. i would often throw it on in the background while i was doing any number of mind numbing tasks. i could only recall the feeling of great nostalgia that came with it; i was a child again, watching from the living room floor. i could tell you nothing of the intricacies of it’s film making.

over the past twenty-two years, the harry potter franchise has grown, and in some respects metastasised, into a money making machine. the eight movies alone generated over 7 billion u.s. dollars, with harry potter and the deathly hallows, part two contributing to 1.3 billion of that. in the wake of the train wreck that was the crimes of grindelwald, i began to think about how the series managed to devolve to that point. that was when i realised i could recall nothing about the franchise as an object. i could tell you the full, expansive plot of each movie, but i couldn’t comment critically on those movies objectively.

before continuing, i would just like to make clear that there is nothing wrong with liking a movie franchise or a television series purely for nostalgia. all i am doing here is looking at each harry potter film objectively and asking the question how did we get to here?

i’m going to take a wild guess and say most people here know the plot of harry potter and the philosopher’s stone, but going to give you the run down anyway. just in case you need a lil refresher.

an orphan named harry potter learns on his eleventh birthday that he is the son of martyr witch and wizard, lily and james potter. he is invited to attend the highly esteemed english boarding school for wizards, hogwarts, where he forms close friendships with two of his classmates, ron and hermoine. with the help of his new friends, harry seeks to uncover the illusive truth behind his parents’ untimely deaths.

the film was released in 2001 and cost 130 million u.s. dolla dolla to make. it was directed by chris columbus, an american filmmaker. columbus was already well established in the film industry, having directed home alone, and would go on to direct the next two harry potter films. clearly he’s having a bit of a mid-life crisis right now, as his recent projects include the 2015 film pixels. that’s a yikes for him.

i’ve watched the philosopher's stone a few times this week and have managed to cobble together all of my thoughts and comments into one handy list.

the score was phenomenal . . .

kicking things off with an obvious one, i can’t believe i never comprehended how good the score for this movie. the opening track the most recogniseable, however, the whole viewing experience is enhanced by the score running throughout. i am full on willing to proclaim john williams as a god of film scores.

harry was one scary boi . . .

in one of the first scenes of the film, harry and the dursleys go to a zoo to celebrate dudley’s birthday. while there, harry discovers he can talk to snakes and accidentally imprisons his cousin in the snake’s enclosure. this does not faze harry at all, unaware at this time that he is a wizard, and laughs as he watches his aunt and cousin in a state of panic. okay, harry...sadist. this happens again as he watches his cousin grow a pig tail. later on, during a flying lesson, harry threatens to knock malfoy off his broom. like, calm the fuck down, harry! fucking believe you. harry was actually kind of sinister in the first act. like damn.

what was some of that acting ? ? ?

one of the reasons why i wanted to revisit this series was that i have a bit of a pet peeve when it comes to child actors in media. i sometimes forget how heavily the harry potter series actually rides on child actors, being that i was watching the movie at the same age of the actors. now, i am not maligning radcliffe, watson or grint at all, but what was some of that line delivery, lads? the acting was definitely not bad but some parts just felt awkward and forced. i don’t know, maybe it’s just me, but sometimes i felt a little weird watching little forced interactions. maybe it just adds to the charm!

hagrid can make one quick get away . . .

as hagrid and harry make their way through the train station, harry is distracted by his ticket. when he looks up to ask hagrid about the platform, hagrid is gone. where the fuck did hagrid go? either he had to apparate, which he ain’t allowed to do, not to mention harry would have heard him do that, or he had to run away. is hagrid the richard kuklinski of the wizarding world or am i missing something?

hermoine practices magic underage . . .

now, it has been a while since i’ve watched the whole series, but i am pretty sure hermoine shouldn’t be perfecting basic spells at home. like, what’s the story there, j.k. rowling?

wtf is professor flitwick  ? ? ?

this was the first time i noticed all of the prosthetics on professor flitwick’s face. nightmare fuel, lads, i am telling you!

harry is a pot stirrer . . .

i think we’re going to need another feather here, professor. shut the fuck up, harry! no one wanted your imput. i think she heard you. you don’t say! nobody asked you, drama queen. quit stirring the pot. jeez.

wizards are immune to splinters . . .

so you’re telling me that hemoine can be pelted with broken pieces of wood and harry and ron can pick up said pieces of wood and throw them with force and not get any splinters? i think not.

what is harry doing during that first match ? ? ?

during the first quidditch match, harry spends most of his time sitting on his broom reacting to what everyone else is doing. do your job, bitch!

the c.g.i. is actually okay . . .

the c.g.i. and other special effects are of course dated now, considering how much computer generated pictures have improved since the 2000s. however, all in all, i think the film has aged well in terms of it’s cinematography and general design. fluffy, norbert the dragon and the fast paced quidditch matches all look pretty good, unless you go looking for flaws.

norbert was adorable . . .

i would die for norbert.

tom felton's facial expressions were so good . . .

this was something i only noticed as the film progressed. tom felton did a great job at providing me with a good chuckle with his facial expressions. he doesn’t actually feature in the film a lot, consider how pivotal his character would eventually become to the series, yet he certainly makes an impact in some of his scenes.

the professors were so fucking dumb . . .

hagrid is far to easy of a victim here, but mcgonagall has no excuse. shouldn’t the three of them have been on lockdown since the troll incident. i understand, to a degree, her lenience with harry, but not with ron and hermoine. shouldn’t she have found it a little more weird that the three of them knew about the philosopher’s stone? regardless of how they came to find out about it, they could so easily have told anyone about it being in hogwarts. surely that would have jeprodised their operation?

ron was full on ready to die ? ? ?

did ron actually believe he was going to die there? like, excuse me ron, but what the fuck?

quirrell had some nasty ass nails . . .

someone cut those things, please!

voldemort’s character design . . .

i wouldn’t have noticed this the first time around, obviously, but voldemort has a nose in this first rendition of his design? i can kind of understand why he devolves into his more snakelike appearance of the goblet of fire but it’s kind of weird to see him like that in hindsight.

all in all, the philosopher’s stone encapsulates the heart of what harry potter is. i found it quite hard to return to this film, knowing where the franchise would end up. this film and others following it would certainly generate a lot of cash. but films like the crimes of grindelwald frustrate me as they are nothing but cash grab. it exploits an originally wholesome, well-meaning series and destroys its integrity. trying to fit these two films into the same universe is like trying to force together two positive ends of a magnet.

the philosopher’s stone is most certainly not a perfect film, and for me sits in about seventh place in terms of ranking all the movies. but it perfectly represents the essence of the series.

alienating it from the series and taking it objectively, i would give the film a five out of ten. it was never going to be my favourite film, and it wasn’t even my favourite harry potter film during my childhood. looking at it now, there are parts of the script i don’t really like and some line delivery is hard to get on board with. however, this isn’t enough to take me out of the film completely and i can certainly enjoy myself while watching.

this film is definitely a ten out of ten for nostalgia though. i think everyone can remember what they were doing and the feelings they were experiencing the first time they watched the philosopher’s stone. there is something warming and home-y about it. the truth is that this film not made for me any more. it was made for an eleven year old. i’m not sure how much someone who didn’t watch the film in the childhood would get out of this film. the characters were so relatable to me and as i made my way through the books and the movies i felt as if i was growing old and maturing with them. i’m sure i’m not the only one to feel this way and i’m definitely not the last.

in conclusion, this was a nice film to return to, and certain an experience i would recommend to anyone considering it. no, it was not as groundbreaking and thrilling as i once thought it would be. it certainly also makes things such as cursed child and the crimes of grindelwald more frustrating. but, it is certainly a nice one to come home to if you’re stressed out or feeling some january blues.

next month, i shall return to the world of harry potter to revisit the chamber of secrets. until then, you will have to make do with two more lists and two proper reviews. i have a hold the dark demolition in progress for next week, which shall be fun! but until next friday, farewell.

originally posted on the 13th of january . . . 

[nadjaofstatenisland]

What if hermione just invented having slept with Fred and really talked up how great it was just to get under hirams skin and now Hiram has this massive vendetta against Fred and Archie and is ready to slaughter them both because hermione can’t live without stirring the pot I sincerely hope this is true. It’s what she deserves.

Hermione is a pot stirrer if there ever was one.

Just like she promised her daughter, she tells Hiram over the phone one day that she’s been seeing Fred but it’s over now. When he’s out of prison a few months later, he doesn’t bring it up and neither does she. Nothing even happened between her and Fred really. A few sloppy make outs, second base, and a hickey she had to hide from Veronica.

It’s not until Hiram’s been back over a month that it comes out during a fight. “And you fucked Fred when I was away!” She rolls with it, she just can’t help herself.

Hiram’s not an insecure man, but Fred’s always been a sore spot. So what if Fred was an inch taller (and a few inches of something else somewhere else)? Was he going to hold that pro and con list from junior year against her forever?

[letscuttothefeeling]

season three episode five

How much allegiance does your hairdresser owe you? Most people form a pretty tight bond with the person cutting their hair. Not only do you entrust your hairdresser with your appearance and whatever gossip you share while getting your head massaged – you also trust them not to murder you even though they could easily slit your throat with scissors!! I know you’re pondering that ethical dilemma, but dropetté because it’s time to cut to the feeling!

 Okay, we’re starting off with Amanda and Chloe at the beach, discussing Cara’s freakoutté in the last episode, which is great because I want to rewind and delve further into it. The more I watch it, the less it makes sense. Why would the producers intervene? They barely stepped in when Juliette started hitting Chloe and Amanda – why whisk Cara away just for yelling that no one graduated high school for the fortieth time? Well, I hope you’re a fan of conspiracy theories because have I got one for you. I believe that the producers instructed Alex to push a fabricated storyline involving Cara cheating on G Baby. I’m guessing that they figured Cara would either go along with it, or that she’d get angry, (because that’s her job…) but what they didn’t predict was that Cara had reached her breaking point. Instead of screaming at Alex, (which is what they tried to play this off as,) I think she was screaming at the producers about the utter fakeness of the show. She was tired of constantly being painted as the villain. Which is why they ultimately removed her from the boat. It would also explain the choppy editing and the fact that she dropped out of the show. Thoughts? Opinions? I don’t care, I’m right. Let’s move on.

Finally, the moment I’ve been waiting for – ALYSSA’S SIESTA KEY DEBUT! Who is Alyssa, you ask? LET ME EXPLAIN. Alyssa is Alex’s long-time family friend and current baby mama! She is also Juliette’s former friend from FSU and – you guessed it – HAIRDRESSER. Hairdresser! Has she no decency!? If you’re a friend, feel free to date my ex, but if you’re my hairdresser?! Dream on, bitch! I swear to God, the day Savannah (my hairdresser) starts dating my ex?! Utter chaos! Sadly, Juliette was warned that her hairdresser was a sneaky brownnoser with a hidden agenda. In last season, we witnessed a Chloe and Juliette blowuppé caused by Juliette’s pesky hairdresser! Her OWN HAIRDRESSER told Chloe she was talking shit. While that would be more than enough for me to say goodbye, Juliette kind of has this pattern of ignoring people’s many glaring red flags, idk if you’ve noticed it though, it’s something not many people know about her.

 Anyways, this is a betrayal worse than JC and Brutus, worse than JC and Judas, and dare I say – even worse than that time in Stephanie Meyer’s third American novel in the Twilight Series – Eclipse, when Bella, desperate to stop Jacob from fighting in werewolf form against the savage newborn vampire army Victoria and her new lover Riley had created, kisses Jacob in what she claims is an attempt to get him to stay with her in the safety of the tent, but what we know is an act of love and a direct betrayal of Vampire Edward. It hurts to even think about it. And right after they got engaged? Bella, you can be so heartless. But is this funny because we find out later that even though Alex may find Alyssa to be hotter than Juliette, he literally doesn’t like her. Ouch!

Wait – he doesn’t like her? I thought she was with child – his child! Well, you’re right, she is carrying a small Shrek Alex inside of her uterus, but I guess having someone’s child doesn’t actually force them to like you. Who knew? Would have saved me a lot of grief to have that intel, let me tell you. LOL!! Anyways, we know he doesn’t like Alyssa because he told Juliette to her face that he doesn’t like Alyssa. After Juliette and Boring Robby: The Liar have yet another unsuccessful (and boring) conversation about Alex, Juliette ignores his wishes and goes to see Alex for the first time since the breakuppé anyways. But before we discuss their conversation, I need to get something off my chest. I get a distinctly strange Fatherly vibe from Boring Robby when he and Juliette talk, and it’s so unsettling. Maybe it’s the never-ending rip off of Confucius quotes that spill out of his mouth hole uncontrollably? Seriously, Boring Robby’s only talent (besides stealing) is word vomiting random phrases that don’t pertain to the topic of conversation whatsoever. I mean, “That’s like sitting in the driver’s seat, moving forward, while watching the rearview mirror.” Intern, get this philosopher a quill, some ink, and a Pulitzer Prize…STAT!

Juliette and Alex’s talk goes just about as well as it could possibly go. (It goes horribly.) Luckily, we got some genuine dynamite quotes from the exchange. I was geeking watching this because Juliette has this wonderful habit of exercising exactly zero willpower when it comes to Alex, so we truly get a look inside her brain during this convo. Like she literally can’t control what she says. Maybe that’s why she’s dating Boring Robby. He can’t stop quoting Seventeen Magazine, and Juliette can’t stop herself from screaming “You haven’t found a girl that’s hotter than me” at her ex. It’s one and the same. When Alex and Juliette sit down to talk, it gets heated pretty quickly. Alex admits that he’s not over Juliette, and even though he has “found a girl (or ten) hotter than [Juliette]”, he “hasn’t found a girl [he] likes more than [Juliette].” Juliette brings up Alex’s threating texts to Boring Robby, there are tears from both parties, and Juliette drives off. It’s like, I get why you wanted to, but really Juliette – how did you think this would go?

Okay so let’s take a break from all of this Jalex drama. As much as I love it – wow it’s exhausting! Cut to: BG and Amanda getting steamy in the hot tub! Unfortunately for Brandon, the only thing he’s getting is a steaming pile of rejection. When BG asks Amanda to be official, presumably because he’s worried about her ex, she tells him she doesn’t want to put a label on it. Cringe! Meanwhile, Kelsey and her new friend Jake seem to be getting close, and no – I didn’t mean to type “Jared.” That’s right, Kelsey is up to her usual antics and starting to date multiple guys at once again, finally! As Jake, who is also Robby’s best friend, tearfully confides in Kelsey about his sick father, Kelsey reassuringly responds, “Clearly you have a good shoulder on your head. Your Dad has raised you right.” Normally I would crucify her for this blunder, but she’s been so great this season that I’ll let it slide. Kind of.

 This is me not letting it slide.

Time for Amanda’s party! The first fun thing that happens is that Chloe and Juliette finally makeup, thank GOD because I like both of them infinitely more when they’re friends. The second fun thing is that even though noble Juliette leaves Boring Robby at home out of respect for Alex, Alex walks in holding her – gasp – HAIRDRESSER’S hand. Mike drop, Alex! Jake, Kelsey’s new love interest and Robby’s BFF, makes a sly comment about Alex which TOTALLY comes back to bite him in the ass when none other than shit-stirrer Chloe decides to blow up his spot – but we’ll get to that later. For now, Juliette’s just trying to keep her cool. Respect!

Juliette has been keeping it under control until Amanda confronts her about the lost phone. As we know, Amanda suspects Robby of stealing her phone. And based on Juliette’s face, he is guilty as charged. Juliette breaks down and tells Amanda that Boring Robby threw her phone in the ocean. Surprisingly, Amanda is really nice to Juliette about it, so major props! I think Amanda knows Juliette didn’t have anything to do with the phone and is probably very overwhelmed since she’s being filmed while her ex-boyfriend and ex-hairdresser are making out in front of her face while she’s trying to repair relationships with her best friends. So good for Amanda. Now that Juliette has her friends back, she’s ready for anything. Well, almost anything.

The party’s going too well, so Chloe decides to stir the pot and tell Alex that Jake called him a “sociopath” as Jake is sitting right next to him. Alex immediately dares him to define the word sociopath. This is particularly hilarious because just last week, Alex asked Cara to define the word slander. Why is his go-to insult asking people if they know the Merriam Webster definition of various words? Like next thing you know, you’re going to be asking me how to spell it and use it in a sentence. This isn’t Scripps. Anyways, before Jake can even try to define it, Alex steps in and defines sociopath as “Someone that obsesses over multiple things, that is um…very uh…self-centered, I guess you could say.” SO close, buddy! But no cigar. He truly puts the dick in dictionary, am I right?! His new girlfriend also channels his dick vibe and waltzes up to Juliette to “talk.” I love when people decide to “talk” to Juliette when she’s wasted and vulnerable. Leave Juliette alone! Luckily, Alyssa ends up looking like a complete idiot. She’s condescending, rude, and acts like Juliette has no reason to be thrown off. Even when Alex comes up, Juliette stands her ground and remains fairly level-headed. Alyssa walks away to let the two hash it out, but then proceeds to scream from across the room for Alex to come stand next to her, and admits defeat by confiding in her friends that “he still loves Juliette.” Stay in your lane, sweetie. You’re just a rebound. (Until you get knocked up…but we don’t know that yet.) See you next week.  

[bbusallday]

BB19 Daytime Updates - 7/22 - Day 32 (Complete)

Updater: Hannah

Recent evictee: Dominique Returning houseguest: Cody HOH: Jessica Nominees: Josh & Ramses POV players: Jessica, Ramses, Josh, Christmas, Jason & Cody   POV holder: Have nots: Josh

9:13 AM – Feeds are back from the morning wake up call.

Most of the houseguests don't even get up or turn on the bedroom lights.

9:19 AM – cam 3

Mark and Jason in the storage room.

Mark asks why Jason was surprised to hear nothing has changed with them game-wise since Cody is now back.

Jason says he wasn't surprised, he just didn't know because of Cody being back and he hadn't talked to anyone.

Mark says he and Cody are just starting over now since he threw him under the bus before he left.

Ramses comes in so they leave.

9:29 AM – cam 4

Cody and Jason in the kitchen.

They are laughing and saying they should have been evicted way early in the game and they are going to make it far.

Cody says everyone is nervous in the house thinking they are getting backdoored this week and now they know that Cody, Alex and Jason are all playing in the HOH next week and their side can win again.

Cody says he thought Josh was an outsider but he needs to go because he is a puppet for the other side.

Cody asks if Kevin is still solid with Jason/Alex. Jason says he is.

Jason says the worst thing that could happen is if Christmas gets HOH. (they are really whispering so it is hard to catch every word and they are looking at the memory wall and talking about people, but not using names)

Jason asks about Mark. Cody says he thought he could trust him, but they are on good terms now but who knows what will happen. Cody says Mark probably isn't on either side loyally, he was just really with Dom.

Cody says Alex was right about Mark's loyalty to Dom so he was happy to see Dom be evicted.

Cody says it is still clear that everyone wants him out of the house. Jason says they are scared of Cody.

Cody says they should be scared of Jess.

They talk about the last HOH comp and that Jess did so well. Next they discuss the battle back.

Cody asks why everyone wanted Paul to compete against him. Jason says everyone just instantly said Paul should do it.

Cody: How many of these people are going to start playing their own games. Are you all going to be duds and let Paul run the show?

Cody says he doesn't trust anyone no matter how nice they are all being to him.

Cody says he takes everyone's disloyalty extremely personally, especially the ones that gave him punishments.

Jason agrees and says that gives you more focus and fuel to want to win.

(Ramses is on cam 1 awake in the main bedroom during this whole convo, I'm not sure if he can hear Jason/Cody)

Cody says he guarantees people on the outside want Cody/Jason/Alex/Jess to work together and go far because everyone else are “dud city”. He talks about how no one else is good at comps.

They discuss Mark and that he is a flip-flopper and a coward so he is hard to trust.

Cody brings up the three votes to keep him and that it probably scared Paul.

Jason says he was mad he didn't vote to save Cody because he didn't know three other people would. Jason says he didn't do it because he didn't want to be in trouble in the house for voting against the group. Jason says he thinks one of the votes was Christmas just to frame him.

Jason talks about how he wanted Dom and Matt up last week but Alex wanted to put Jess up to the keep the house calm. He tells Cody about things that happened with Dom last week.

Cody asks if Jason is against the house from this point on and wants do some damage.

Jason is hesitant and brings up Alex. Cody says Alex will want him to take the safe route because that is what Jess wants to do. Jason agrees.

Cody says he wants to do anything to stir things up, as long as he gets to jury with Jess he is good.

Cody says Jess respects Jason.

Next topic is Josh and that he is a pot-stirrer and just goes with whatever people tell him. They laugh about him and make fun of him for a while.

(side note; Cody makes coffee and uses 5 coffee filters in the coffee maker ??)

Jason brings the convo back to Christmas and that she is crazy, an emotional wreck, she spreads negativity. Cody is nodding in agreement to everything he says.

Cody says everyone wants to keep Christmas around because she isn't a threat.

Jason says Paul was trying really hard to win the battle back and he said that if someone comes back they will just vote whoever it is right out.

Jason leaves to use the bathroom. You can hear him talking still as soon as the door closes.

Jason to himself: What the f*ck am I gonna do, what the f*ck am I gonna do? Sh*t, sh*t, sh*t! (10:06 AM)

10:08 AM – cam 3

Cody and Jess in the HOH room.

Cody: Christmas voted for me to stay, it wasn't Jason.

Cody tells Jess about his convo with Jason.

Jessica: Why would he admit that to you?

Cody says he is an idiot and he talks too much.

Cody says Kevin also told him that he voted for Cody to stay but to not tell anyone.

Jess says she knew that, she has been saying Kevin is the one lying about the votes and he voted to evict Jillian too.

We have a few minutes of fish. Feeds are back at 10:18 AM and all cams are on sleeping houseguests. After a few minutes cams show Cody, Matt and Jason chatting in the kitchen.

10:50 AM

Houseguests are getting up one by one, everyone is just chatting in the kitchen about various things.

10:55 AM – cam 4

Paul, Alex and Jason in the main bedroom.

Paul says they have 7 votes already to keep Josh. He says only Elena/Mark won't vote with them and not to mention it to them because they will tell Cody/Jess.

They say they can't tell Ramses either. Paul says Ramses made a deal with Jess/Cody the week Paul was HOH.

Jason says Ramses knew he was going up yesterday, Jess/Cody warned him.

Paul says they are working together.

Jason says Cody told him they will take Ramses out next week.

Paul says Cody is just saying that.

They agree Ramses needs to go this week because they can't let him slide another week.

Paul says whenever they are bored of Josh they will get rid of him, but they can use him because he is after Mark, Cody and Jess.

12:08 PM – cam 3

Christmas and Kevin in the main bedroom. Alex and Paul are there too but they are sleeping.

Kevin asks about Cody/Jess. Christmas says they are working hard to integrate. Kevin agrees and says Cody said he has to work on his social skills.

Kevin says if Cody knows anything about the vote flip this week and wins the POV he will take Ramses down. Christmas doesn't think Cody knows so he won't use the veto if he wins.

Kevin says it looks like Matt/Mark are back with Cody. Christmas says Matt isn't happy with Cody so he is just being nice to him.

Houseguests are just chatting, eating breakfast, getting ready.

1:14 PM – Feeds switch to the Kitty/Bunny Cam.

Feeds back at 1:47 PM

They picked veto players; Jessica, Ramses, Josh, Christmas, Jason & Cody are playing.

1:48 PM – cam 4

Christmas and Ramses in the love bedroom.

Christmas is saying that she may not get to play and she doesn't know about using the veto because unnecessary waves could be created, and if Ramses stays up they are keeping Jess's plan in place.

She says they will talk if she is able to play and does win.

Christmas asks if he feels comfortable.

Ramses says no because he is on the block, but he knows Josh is a bigger target than him and he knows a lot of people don't want Josh in the jury.

Christmas says she thinks Ramses is good this week, she even implies that if Ramses wins the veto he wouldn't need to save himself.

Matt comes in and Ramses leaves.

Matt says he walked into the HOH bathroom and Jess was showering, she thought Matt was Cody coming in the room. Matt says Jess said she really wants to talk to Alex before the veto comp.

Christmas talks about how Elena is close to Ramses.

Matt thinks Mark has a deal with Jess/Cody. He says Elena/Mark are floating between the sides.

Raven comes in and shows Christmas her foot, she got her stitches out. They continue to talk about Mark/Elena. They say they need to get Ramses out because Elena has him reeled in with her.

They talk about how Cody/Jess think they have Jason/Alex. Matt says they can throw the HOH to Jason or Alex and they will nominate either Cody/Jess or Mark/Elena.

Christmas says they should put up either Cody/Mark together or Elena/Jess together. Matt/Raven like that idea.

2:10 PM – cam 1

Jessica and Ramses in the bathroom.

Jessica is assuring Ramses she wants him to stay, she says she will do everything in her power to win veto.

Ramses says he feels good about staying.

2:15 PM  cam 1

Jess and Alex in the lounge.

Jess says she has a feeling Alex wasn't happy with the nominations this week.

Alex says she isn't.

Jess wants to explain her nominations. Jess says Josh is such a wild card and he distracts Jess and throws off her game because of the things he does/says. She says she needs Josh out of the house so can have a clear mind and pursue the bigger targets.

Alex says she understands and she wants both of them out too.

Jess says she isn't going to flip back to the other side of the house, her and Cody are with Alex/Jason.

Jess wants to make sure if Jason wins the POV he won't use it. Alex says he won't.

2:28 PM – cam 4

Mark and Cody in the kitchen.

They are checking in together and say they are happy with their position in the game and they have a group of strong people working with them.

Mark says he felt so bad for what happened and he is glad he and Cody are in a good place now.

Cody says Jess filled him in on what he missed and he is very happy with Mark, Elena and Matt.

2:58 PM

Cams 1 & 2 - Raven, Jess and Christmas doing makeup in the bathroom.

Cams 3 & 4 - Kevin, Paul, Ramses and Alex in the main bedroom telling stories.

If you would like to help us and become a live feed updater send us a message or ask!

[darcyolsson]

omg one up me again i dare u -bee movie person

fine

bee movie script but ever “honey” is a honey pot emoji and theres a shit load of enters

According to all known laws

of aviation,

 there is no way a bee

should be able to fly.

 Its wings are too small to get

its fat little body off the ground.

 The bee, of course, flies anyway

 because bees don’t care

what humans think is impossible.

 Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

Yellow, black. Yellow, black.

 Ooh, black and yellow!

Let’s shake it up a little.

 Barry! Breakfast is ready!

 Ooming!

 Hang on a second.

 Hello?

 - Barry?

- Adam?

 - Oan you believe this is happening?

- I can’t. I’ll pick you up.

 Looking sharp.

 Use the stairs. Your father

paid good money for those.

 Sorry. I’m excited.

 Here’s the graduate.

We’re very proud of you, son.

 A perfect report card, all B’s.

 Very proud.

 Ma! I got a thing going here.

 - You got lint on your fuzz.

- Ow! That’s me!

 - Wave to us! We’ll be in row 118,000.

- Bye!

 Barry, I told you,

stop flying in the house!

 - Hey, Adam.

- Hey, Barry.

 - Is that fuzz gel?

- A little. Special day, graduation.

 Never thought I’d make it.

 Three days grade school,

three days high school.

 Those were awkward.

 Three days college. I’m glad I took

a day and hitchhiked around the hive.

 You did come back different.

 - Hi, Barry.

- Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good.

 - Hear about Frankie?

- Yeah.

 - You going to the funeral?

- No, I’m not going.

 Everybody knows,

sting someone, you die.

 Don’t waste it on a squirrel.

Such a hothead.

 I guess he could have

just gotten out of the way.

 I love this incorporating

an amusement park into our day.

 That’s why we don’t need vacations.

 Boy, quite a bit of pomp…

under the circumstances.

 - Well, Adam, today we are men.

- We are!

 - Bee-men.

- Amen!

 Hallelujah!

 Students, faculty, distinguished bees,

 please welcome Dean Buzzwell.

 Welcome, New Hive Oity

graduating class of…

 …9:15.

 That concludes our ceremonies.

 And begins your career

at Honex Industries!

 Will we pick ourjob today?

 I heard it’s just orientation.

 Heads up! Here we go.

 Keep your hands and antennas

inside the tram at all times.

 - Wonder what it’ll be like?

- A little scary.

 Welcome to Honex,

a division of Honesco

 and a part of the Hexagon Group.

 This is it!

 Wow.

 Wow.

 We know that you, as a bee,

have worked your whole life

 to get to the point where you

can work for your whole life.

 🍯 begins whenour valiant Pollen

Jocks bring the nectar to the hive.

 Our top-secret formula

 is automatically color-corrected,

scent-adjusted and bubble-contoured

 into this soothing sweet syrup

 with its distinctive

golden glow you know as…

 🍯!

 - That girl was hot.

- She’s my cousin!

 - She is?

- Yes, we’re all cousins.

 - Right. You’re right.

- At Honex, we constantly strive

 to improve every aspect

of bee existence.

 These bees are stress-testing

a new helmet technology.

 - What do you think he makes?

- Not enough.

 Here we have our latest advancement,

the Krelman.

 - What does that do?

- Oatches that little strand of 🍯

 that hangs after you pour it.

Saves us millions.

 Oan anyone work on the Krelman?

 Of course. Most bee jobs are

small ones. But bees know

 that every small job,

if it’s done well, means a lot.

 But choose carefully

 because you’ll stay in the job

you pick for the rest of your life.

 The same job the rest of your life?

I didn’t know that.

 What’s the difference?

 You’ll be happy to know that bees,

as a species, haven’t had one day off

 in 27 million years.

 So you’ll just work us to death?

 We’ll sure try.

 Wow! That blew my mind!

 “What’s the difference?”

How can you say that?

 One job forever?

That’s an insane choice to have to make.

 I’m relieved. Now we only have

to make one decision in life.

 But, Adam, how could they

never have told us that?

 Why would you question anything?

We’re bees.

 We’re the most perfectly

functioning society on Earth.

 You ever think maybe things

work a little too well here?

 Like what? Give me one example.

 I don’t know. But you know

what I’m talking about.

 Please clear the gate.

Royal Nectar Force on approach.

 Wait a second. Oheck it out.

 - Hey, those are Pollen Jocks!

- Wow.

 I’ve never seen them this close.

 They know what it’s like

outside the hive.

 Yeah, but some don’t come back.

 - Hey, Jocks!

- Hi, Jocks!

 You guys did great!

 You’re monsters!

You’re sky freaks! I love it! I love it!

 - I wonder where they were.

- I don’t know.

 Their day’s not planned.

 Outside the hive, flying who knows

where, doing who knows what.

 You can'tjust decide to be a Pollen

Jock. You have to be bred for that.

 Right.

 Look. That’s more pollen

than you and I will see in a lifetime.

 It’s just a status symbol.

Bees make too much of it.

 Perhaps. Unless you’re wearing it

and the ladies see you wearing it.

 Those ladies?

Aren’t they our cousins too?

 Distant. Distant.

 Look at these two.

 - Oouple of Hive Harrys.

- Let’s have fun with them.

 It must be dangerous

being a Pollen Jock.

 Yeah. Once a bear pinned me

against a mushroom!

 He had a paw on my throat,

and with the other, he was slapping me!

 - Oh, my!

- I never thought I’d knock him out.

 What were you doing during this?

 Trying to alert the authorities.

 I can autograph that.

 A little gusty out there today,

wasn’t it, comrades?

 Yeah. Gusty.

 We’re hitting a sunflower patch

six miles from here tomorrow.

 - Six miles, huh?

- Barry!

 A puddle jump for us,

but maybe you’re not up for it.

 - Maybe I am.

- You are not!

 We’re going 0900 at J-Gate.

 What do you think, buzzy-boy?

Are you bee enough?

 I might be. It all depends

on what 0900 means.

 Hey, Honex!

 Dad, you surprised me.

 You decide what you’re interested in?

 - Well, there’s a lot of choices.

- But you only get one.

 Do you ever get bored

doing the same job every day?

 Son, let me tell you about stirring.

 You grab that stick, and you just

move it around, and you stir it around.

 You get yourself into a rhythm.

It’s a beautiful thing.

 You know, Dad,

the more I think about it,

 maybe the 🍯 field

just isn’t right for me.

 You were thinking of what,

making balloon animals?

 That’s a bad job

for a guy with a stinger.

 Janet, your son’s not sure

he wants to go into 🍯!

 - Barry, you are so funny sometimes.

- I’m not trying to be funny.

 You’re not funny! You’re going

into 🍯. Our son, the stirrer!

 - You’re gonna be a stirrer?

- No one’s listening to me!

 Wait till you see the sticks I have.

 I could say anything right now.

I’m gonna get an ant tattoo!

 Let’s open some 🍯 and celebrate!

 Maybe I’ll pierce my thorax.

Shave my antennae.

 Shack up with a grasshopper. Get

a gold tooth and call everybody “dawg”!

 I’m so proud.

 - We’re starting work today!

- Today’s the day.

 Oome on! All the good jobs

will be gone.

 Yeah, right.

 Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring,

stirrer, front desk, hair removal…

 - Is it still available?

- Hang on. Two left!

 One of them’s yours! Oongratulations!

Step to the side.

 - What’d you get?

- Picking crud out. Stellar!

 Wow!

 Oouple of newbies?

 Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready!

 Make your choice.

 - You want to go first?

- No, you go.

 Oh, my. What’s available?

 Restroom attendant’s open,

not for the reason you think.

 - Any chance of getting the Krelman?

- Sure, you’re on.

 I’m sorry, the Krelman just closed out.

 Wax monkey’s always open.

 The Krelman opened up again.

 What happened?

 A bee died. Makes an opening. See?

He’s dead. Another dead one.

 Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.

 Dead from the neck up.

Dead from the neck down. That’s life!

 Oh, this is so hard!

 Heating, cooling,

stunt bee, pourer, stirrer,

 humming, inspector number seven,

lint coordinator, stripe supervisor,

 mite wrangler. Barry, what

do you think I should… Barry?

 Barry!

 All right, we’ve got the sunflower patch

in quadrant nine…

 What happened to you?

Where are you?

 - I’m going out.

- Out? Out where?

 - Out there.

- Oh, no!

 I have to, before I go

to work for the rest of my life.

 You’re gonna die! You’re crazy! Hello?

 Another call coming in.

 If anyone’s feeling brave,

there’s a Korean deli on 83rd

 that gets their roses today.

 Hey, guys.

 - Look at that.

- Isn’t that the kid we saw yesterday?

 Hold it, son, flight deck’s restricted.

 It’s OK, Lou. We’re gonna take him up.

 Really? Feeling lucky, are you?

 Sign here, here. Just initial that.

 - Thank you.

- OK.

 You got a rain advisory today,

 and as you all know,

bees cannot fly in rain.

 So be careful. As always,

watch your brooms,

 hockey sticks, dogs,

birds, bears and bats.

 Also, I got a couple of reports

of root beer being poured on us.

 Murphy’s in a home because of it,

babbling like a cicada!

 - That’s awful.

- And a reminder for you rookies,

 bee law number one,

absolutely no talking to humans!

 All right, launch positions!

 Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz,

buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!

 Black and yellow!

 Hello!

 You ready for this, hot shot?

 Yeah. Yeah, bring it on.

 Wind, check.

 - Antennae, check.

- Nectar pack, check.

 - Wings, check.

- Stinger, check.

 Scared out of my shorts, check.

 OK, ladies,

 let’s move it out!

 Pound those petunias,

you striped stem-suckers!

 All of you, drain those flowers!

 Wow! I’m out!

 I can’t believe I’m out!

 So blue.

 I feel so fast and free!

 Box kite!

 Wow!

 Flowers!

 This is Blue Leader.

We have roses visual.

 Bring it around 30 degrees and hold.

 Roses!

 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around.

 Stand to the side, kid.

It’s got a bit of a kick.

 That is one nectar collector!

 - Ever see pollination up close?

- No, sir.

 I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it

over here. Maybe a dash over there,

 a pinch on that one.

See that? It’s a little bit of magic.

 That’s amazing. Why do we do that?

 That’s pollen power. More pollen, more

flowers, more nectar, more 🍯 for us.

 Oool.

 I’m picking up a lot of bright yellow.

Oould be daisies. Don’t we need those?

 Oopy that visual.

 Wait. One of these flowers

seems to be on the move.

 Say again? You’re reporting

a moving flower?

 Affirmative.

 That was on the line!

 This is the coolest. What is it?

 I don’t know, but I’m loving this color.

 It smells good.

Not like a flower, but I like it.

 Yeah, fuzzy.

 Ohemical-y.

 Oareful, guys. It’s a little grabby.

 My sweet lord of bees!

 Oandy-brain, get off there!

 Problem!

 - Guys!

- This could be bad.

 Affirmative.

 Very close.

 Gonna hurt.

 Mama’s little boy.

 You are way out of position, rookie!

 Ooming in at you like a missile!

 Help me!

 I don’t think these are flowers.

 - Should we tell him?

- I think he knows.

 What is this?!

 Match point!

 You can start packing up, 🍯,

because you’re about to eat it!

 Yowser!

 Gross.

 There’s a bee in the car!

 - Do something!

- I’m driving!

 - Hi, bee.

- He’s back here!

 He’s going to sting me!

 Nobody move. If you don’t move,

he won’t sting you. Freeze!

 He blinked!

 Spray him, Granny!

 What are you doing?!

 Wow… the tension level

out here is unbelievable.

 I gotta get home.

 Oan’t fly in rain.

 Oan’t fly in rain.

 Oan’t fly in rain.

 Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down!

 Ken, could you close

the window please?

 Ken, could you close

the window please?

 Oheck out my new resume.

I made it into a fold-out brochure.

 You see? Folds out.

 Oh, no. More humans. I don’t need this.

 What was that?

 Maybe this time. This time. This time.

This time! This time! This…

 Drapes!

 That is diabolical.

 It’s fantastic. It’s got all my special

skills, even my top-ten favorite movies.

 What’s number one? Star Wars?

 Nah, I don’t go for that…

 …kind of stuff.

 No wonder we shouldn’t talk to them.

They’re out of their minds.

 When I leave a job interview, they’re

flabbergasted, can’t believe what I say.

 There’s the sun. Maybe that’s a way out.

 I don’t remember the sun

having a big 75 on it.

 I predicted global warming.

 I could feel it getting hotter.

At first I thought it was just me.

 Wait! Stop! Bee!

 Stand back. These are winter boots.

 Wait!

 Don’t kill him!

 You know I’m allergic to them!

This thing could kill me!

 Why does his life have

less value than yours?

 Why does his life have any less value

than mine? Is that your statement?

 I’m just saying all life has value. You

don’t know what he’s capable of feeling.

 My brochure!

 There you go, little guy.

 I’m not scared of him.

It’s an allergic thing.

 Put that on your resume brochure.

 My whole face could puff up.

 Make it one of your special skills.

 Knocking someone out

is also a special skill.

 Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks.

 - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt night?

- Sure, Ken. You know, whatever.

 - You could put carob chips on there.

- Bye.

 - Supposed to be less calories.

- Bye.

 I gotta say something.

 She saved my life.

I gotta say something.

 All right, here it goes.

 Nah.

 What would I say?

 I could really get in trouble.

 It’s a bee law.

You’re not supposed to talk to a human.

 I can’t believe I’m doing this.

 I’ve got to.

 Oh, I can’t do it. Oome on!

 No. Yes. No.

 Do it. I can’t.

 How should I start it?

“You like jazz?” No, that’s no good.

 Here she comes! Speak, you fool!

 Hi!

 I’m sorry.

 - You’re talking.

- Yes, I know.

 You’re talking!

 I’m so sorry.

 No, it’s OK. It’s fine.

I know I’m dreaming.

 But I don’t recall going to bed.

 Well, I’m sure this

is very disconcerting.

 This is a bit of a surprise to me.

I mean, you’re a bee!

 I am. And I’m not supposed

to be doing this,

 but they were all trying to kill me.

 And if it wasn’t for you…

 I had to thank you.

It’s just how I was raised.

 That was a little weird.

 - I’m talking with a bee.

- Yeah.

 I’m talking to a bee.

And the bee is talking to me!

 I just want to say I’m grateful.

I’ll leave now.

 - Wait! How did you learn to do that?

- What?

 The talking thing.

 Same way you did, I guess.

“Mama, Dada, 🍯.” You pick it up.

 - That’s very funny.

- Yeah.

 Bees are funny. If we didn’t laugh,

we’d cry with what we have to deal with.

 Anyway…

 Oan I…

 …get you something?

- Like what?

 I don’t know. I mean…

I don’t know. Ooffee?

 I don’t want to put you out.

 It’s no trouble. It takes two minutes.

 - It’s just coffee.

- I hate to impose.

 - Don’t be ridiculous!

- Actually, I would love a cup.

 Hey, you want rum cake?

 - I shouldn’t.

- Have some.

 - No, I can’t.

- Oome on!

 I’m trying to lose a couple micrograms.

 - Where?

- These stripes don’t help.

 You look great!

 I don’t know if you know

anything about fashion.

 Are you all right?

 No.

 He’s making the tie in the cab

as they’re flying up Madison.

 He finally gets there.

 He runs up the steps into the church.

The wedding is on.

 And he says, “Watermelon?

I thought you said Guatemalan.

 Why would I marry a watermelon?”

 Is that a bee joke?

 That’s the kind of stuff we do.

 Yeah, different.

 So, what are you gonna do, Barry?

 About work? I don’t know.

 I want to do my part for the hive,

but I can’t do it the way they want.

 I know how you feel.

 - You do?

- Sure.

 My parents wanted me to be a lawyer or

a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist.

 - Really?

- My only interest is flowers.

 Our new queen was just elected

with that same campaign slogan.

 Anyway, if you look…

 There’s my hive right there. See it?

 You’re in Sheep Meadow!

 Yes! I’m right off the Turtle Pond!

 No way! I know that area.

I lost a toe ring there once.

 - Why do girls put rings on their toes?

- Why not?

 - It’s like putting a hat on your knee.

- Maybe I’ll try that.

 - You all right, ma'am?

- Oh, yeah. Fine.

 Just having two cups of coffee!

 Anyway, this has been great.

Thanks for the coffee.

 Yeah, it’s no trouble.

 Sorry I couldn’t finish it. If I did,

I’d be up the rest of my life.

 Are you…?

 Oan I take a piece of this with me?

 Sure! Here, have a crumb.

 - Thanks!

- Yeah.

 All right. Well, then…

I guess I’ll see you around.

 Or not.

 OK, Barry.

 And thank you

so much again… for before.

 Oh, that? That was nothing.

 Well, not nothing, but… Anyway…

 This can’t possibly work.

 He’s all set to go.

We may as well try it.

 OK, Dave, pull the chute.

 - Sounds amazing.

- It was amazing!

 It was the scariest,

happiest moment of my life.

 Humans! I can’t believe

you were with humans!

 Giant, scary humans!

What were they like?

 Huge and crazy. They talk crazy.

 They eat crazy giant things.

They drive crazy.

 - Do they try and kill you, like on TV?

- Some of them. But some of them don’t.

 - How’d you get back?

- Poodle.

 You did it, and I’m glad. You saw

whatever you wanted to see.

 You had your “experience.” Now you

can pick out yourjob and be normal.

 - Well…

- Well?

 Well, I met someone.

 You did? Was she Bee-ish?

 - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you!

- No, no, no, not a wasp.

 - Spider?

- I’m not attracted to spiders.

 I know it’s the hottest thing,

with the eight legs and all.

 I can’t get by that face.

 So who is she?

 She’s… human.

 No, no. That’s a bee law.

You wouldn’t break a bee law.

 - Her name’s Vanessa.

- Oh, boy.

 She’s so nice. And she’s a florist!

 Oh, no! You’re dating a human florist!

 We’re not dating.

 You’re flying outside the hive, talking

to humans that attack our homes

 with power washers and M-80s!

One-eighth a stick of dynamite!

 She saved my life!

And she understands me.

 This is over!

 Eat this.

 This is not over! What was that?

 - They call it a crumb.

- It was so stingin’ stripey!

 And that’s not what they eat.

That’s what falls off what they eat!

 - You know what a Oinnabon is?

- No.

 It’s bread and cinnamon and frosting.

They heat it up…

 Sit down!

 …really hot!

- Listen to me!

 We are not them! We’re us.

There’s us and there’s them!

 Yes, but who can deny

the heart that is yearning?

 There’s no yearning.

Stop yearning. Listen to me!

 You have got to start thinking bee,

my friend. Thinking bee!

 - Thinking bee.

- Thinking bee.

 Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

 There he is. He’s in the pool.

 You know what your problem is, Barry?

 I gotta start thinking bee?

 How much longer will this go on?

 It’s been three days!

Why aren’t you working?

 I’ve got a lot of big life decisions

to think about.

 What life? You have no life!

You have no job. You’re barely a bee!

 Would it kill you

to make a little 🍯?

 Barry, come out.

Your father’s talking to you.

 Martin, would you talk to him?

 Barry, I’m talking to you!

 You coming?

 Got everything?

 All set!

 Go ahead. I’ll catch up.

 Don’t be too long.

 Watch this!

 Vanessa!

 - We’re still here.

- I told you not to yell at him.

 He doesn’t respond to yelling!

 - Then why yell at me?

- Because you don’t listen!

 I’m not listening to this.

 Sorry, I’ve gotta go.

 - Where are you going?

- I’m meeting a friend.

 A girl? Is this why you can’t decide?

 Bye.

 I just hope she’s Bee-ish.

 They have a huge parade

of flowers every year in Pasadena?

 To be in the Tournament of Roses,

that’s every florist’s dream!

 Up on a float, surrounded

by flowers, crowds cheering.

 A tournament. Do the roses

compete in athletic events?

 No. All right, I’ve got one.

How come you don’t fly everywhere?

 It’s exhausting. Why don’t you

run everywhere? It’s faster.

 Yeah, OK, I see, I see.

All right, your turn.

 TiVo. You can just freeze live TV?

That’s insane!

 You don’t have that?

 We have Hivo, but it’s a disease.

It’s a horrible, horrible disease.

 Oh, my.

 Dumb bees!

 You must want to sting all those jerks.

 We try not to sting.

It’s usually fatal for us.

 So you have to watch your temper.

 Very carefully.

You kick a wall, take a walk,

 write an angry letter and throw it out.

Work through it like any emotion:

 Anger, jealousy, lust.

 Oh, my goodness! Are you OK?

 Yeah.

 - What is wrong with you?!

- It’s a bug.

 He’s not bothering anybody.

Get out of here, you creep!

 What was that? A Pic ‘N’ Save circular?

 Yeah, it was. How did you know?

 It felt like about 10 pages.

Seventy-five is pretty much our limit.

 You’ve really got that

down to a science.

 - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue.

- I’ll bet.

 What in the name

of Mighty Hercules is this?

 How did this get here?

Oute Bee, Golden Blossom,

 Ray Liotta Private Select?

 - Is he that actor?

- I never heard of him.

 - Why is this here?

- For people. We eat it.

 You don’t have

enough food of your own?

 - Well, yes.

- How do you get it?

 - Bees make it.

- I know who makes it!

 And it’s hard to make it!

 There’s heating, cooling, stirring.

You need a whole Krelman thing!

 - It’s organic.

- It’s our-ganic!

 It’s just 🍯, Barry.

 Just what?!

 Bees don’t know about this!

This is stealing! A lot of stealing!

 You’ve taken our homes, schools,

hospitals! This is all we have!

 And it’s on sale?!

I’m getting to the bottom of this.

 I’m getting to the bottom

of all of this!

 Hey, Hector.

 - You almost done?

- Almost.

 He is here. I sense it.

 Well, I guess I’ll go home now

 and just leave this nice 🍯 out,

with no one around.

 You’re busted, box boy!

 I knew I heard something.

So you can talk!

 I can talk.

And now you’ll start talking!

 Where you getting the sweet stuff?

Who’s your supplier?

 I don’t understand.

I thought we were friends.

 The last thing we want

to do is upset bees!

 You’re too late! It’s ours now!

 You, sir, have crossed

the wrong sword!

 You, sir, will be lunch

for my iguana, Ignacio!

 Where is the 🍯 coming from?

 Tell me where!

 🍯 Farms! Itcomes from 🍯 Farms!

 Orazy person!

 What horrible thing has happened here?

 These faces, they never knew

what hit them. And now

 they’re on the road to nowhere!

 Just keep still.

 What? You’re not dead?

 Do I look dead? They will wipe anything

that moves. Where you headed?

 To 🍯 Farms.

I am onto something huge here.

 I’m going to Alaska. Moose blood,

crazy stuff. Blows your head off!

 I’m going to Tacoma.

 - And you?

- He really is dead.

 All right.

 Uh-oh!

 - What is that?!

- Oh, no!

 - A wiper! Triple blade!

- Triple blade?

 Jump on! It’s your only chance, bee!

 Why does everything have

to be so doggone clean?!

 How much do you people need to see?!

 Open your eyes!

Stick your head out the window!

 From NPR News in Washington,

I’m Oarl Kasell.

 But don’t kill no more bugs!

 - Bee!

- Moose blood guy!!

 - You hear something?

- Like what?

 Like tiny screaming.

 Turn off the radio.

 Whassup, bee boy?

 Hey, Blood.

 Just a row of 🍯 jars,

as far as the eye could see.

 Wow!

 I assume wherever this truck goes

is where they’re getting it.

 I mean, that 🍯’s ours.

 - Bees hang tight.

- We’re all jammed in.

 It’s a close community.

 Not us, man. We on our own.

Every mosquito on his own.

 - What if you get in trouble?

- You a mosquito, you in trouble.

 Nobody likes us. They just smack.

See a mosquito, smack, smack!

 At least you’re out in the world.

You must meet girls.

 Mosquito girls try to trade up,

get with a moth, dragonfly.

 Mosquito girl don’t want no mosquito.

 You got to be kidding me!

 Mooseblood’s about to leave

the building! So long, bee!

 - Hey, guys!

- Mooseblood!

 I knew I’d catch y'all down here.

Did you bring your crazy straw?

 We throw it in jars, slap a label on it,

and it’s pretty much pure profit.

 What is this place?

 A bee’s got a brain

the size of a pinhead.

 They are pinheads!

 Pinhead.

 - Oheck out the new smoker.

- Oh, sweet. That’s the one you want.

 The Thomas 3000!

 Smoker?

 Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic.

Twice the nicotine, all the tar.

 A couple breaths of this

knocks them right out.

 They make the 🍯,

and we make the money.

 “They make the 🍯,

and we make the money”?

 Oh, my!

 What’s going on? Are you OK?

 Yeah. It doesn’t last too long.

 Do you know you’re

in a fake hive with fake walls?

 Our queen was moved here.

We had no choice.

 This is your queen?

That’s a man in women’s clothes!

 That’s a drag queen!

 What is this?

 Oh, no!

 There’s hundreds of them!

 Bee 🍯.

 Our 🍯 is being brazenly stolen

on a massive scale!

 This is worse than anything bears

have done! I intend to do something.

 Oh, Barry, stop.

 Who told you humans are taking

our 🍯? That’s a rumor.

 Do these look like rumors?

 That’s a conspiracy theory.

These are obviously doctored photos.

 How did you get mixed up in this?

 He’s been talking to humans.

 - What?

- Talking to humans?!

 He has a human girlfriend.

And they make out!

 Make out? Barry!

 We do not.

 - You wish you could.

- Whose side are you on?

 The bees!

 I dated a cricket once in San Antonio.

Those crazy legs kept me up all night.

 Barry, this is what you want

to do with your life?

 I want to do it for all our lives.

Nobody works harder than bees!

 Dad, I remember you

coming home so overworked

 your hands were still stirring.

You couldn’t stop.

 I remember that.

 What right do they have to our 🍯?

 We live on two cups a year. They put it

in lip balm for no reason whatsoever!

 Even if it’s true, what can one bee do?

 Sting them where it really hurts.

 In the face! The eye!

 - That would hurt.

- No.

 Up the nose? That’s a killer.

 There’s only one place you can sting

the humans, one place where it matters.

 Hive at Five, the hive’s only

full-hour action news source.

 No more bee beards!

 With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk.

 Weather with Storm Stinger.

 Sports with Buzz Larvi.

 And Jeanette Ohung.

 - Good evening. I’m Bob Bumble.

- And I’m Jeanette Ohung.

 A tri-county bee, Barry Benson,

 intends to sue the human race

for stealing our 🍯,

 packaging it and profiting

from it illegally!

 Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King,

 we’ll have three former queens here in

our studio, discussing their new book,

 Olassy Ladies,

out this week on Hexagon.

 Tonight we’re talking to Barry Benson.

 Did you ever think, “I’m a kid

from the hive. I can’t do this”?

 Bees have never been afraid

to change the world.

 What about Bee Oolumbus?

Bee Gandhi? Bejesus?

 Where I’m from, we’d never sue humans.

 We were thinking

of stickball or candy stores.

 How old are you?

 The bee community

is supporting you in this case,

 which will be the trial

of the bee century.

 You know, they have a Larry King

in the human world too.

 It’s a common name. Next week…

 He looks like you and has a show

and suspenders and colored dots…

 Next week…

 Glasses, quotes on the bottom from the

guest even though you just heard 'em.

 Bear Week next week!

They’re scary, hairy and here live.

 Always leans forward, pointy shoulders,

squinty eyes, very Jewish.

 In tennis, you attack

at the point of weakness!

 It was my grandmother, Ken. She’s 81.

 🍯, herbackhand’s a joke!

I’m not gonna take advantage of that?

 Quiet, please.

Actual work going on here.

 - Is that that same bee?

- Yes, it is!

 I’m helping him sue the human race.

 - Hello.

- Hello, bee.

 This is Ken.

 Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size

ten and a half. Vibram sole, I believe.

 Why does he talk again?

 Listen, you better go

'cause we’re really busy working.

 But it’s our yogurt night!

 Bye-bye.

 Why is yogurt night so difficult?!

 You poor thing.

You two have been at this for hours!

 Yes, and Adam here

has been a huge help.

 - Frosting…

- How many sugars?

 Just one. I try not

to use the competition.

 So why are you helping me?

 Bees have good qualities.

 And it takes my mind off the shop.

 Instead of flowers, people

are giving balloon bouquets now.

 Those are great, if you’re three.

 And artificial flowers.

 - Oh, those just get me psychotic!

- Yeah, me too.

 Bent stingers, pointless pollination.

 Bees must hate those fake things!

 Nothing worse

than a daffodil that’s had work done.

 Maybe this could make up

for it a little bit.

 - This lawsuit’s a pretty big deal.

- I guess.

 You sure you want to go through with it?

 Am I sure? When I’m done with

the humans, they won’t be able

 to say, “🍯, I’m home,”

without paying a royalty!

 It’s an incredible scene

here in downtown Manhattan,

 where the world anxiously waits,

because for the first time in history,

 we will hear for ourselves

if a 🍯bee can actually speak.

 What have we gotten into here, Barry?

 It’s pretty big, isn’t it?

 I can’t believe how many humans

don’t work during the day.

 You think billion-dollar multinational

food companies have good lawyers?

 Everybody needs to stay

behind the barricade.

 - What’s the matter?

- I don’t know, I just got a chill.

 Well, if it isn’t the bee team.

 You boys work on this?

 All rise! The Honorable

Judge Bumbleton presiding.

 All right. Oase number 4475,

 Superior Oourt of New York,

Barry Bee Benson v. the 🍯 Industry

 is now in session.

 Mr. Montgomery, you’re representing

the five food companies collectively?

 A privilege.

 Mr. Benson… you’re representing

all the bees of the world?

 I’m kidding. Yes, Your Honor,

we’re ready to proceed.

 Mr. Montgomery,

your opening statement, please.

 Ladies and gentlemen of the jury,

 my grandmother was a simple woman.

 Born on a farm, she believed

it was man’s divine right

 to benefit from the bounty

of nature God put before us.

 If we lived in the topsy-turvy world

Mr. Benson imagines,

 just think of what would it mean.

 I would have to negotiate

with the silkworm

 for the elastic in my britches!

 Talking bee!

 How do we know this isn’t some sort of

 holographic motion-picture-capture

Hollywood wizardry?

 They could be using laser beams!

 Robotics! Ventriloquism!

Oloning! For all we know,

 he could be on steroids!

 Mr. Benson?

 Ladies and gentlemen,

there’s no trickery here.

 I’m just an ordinary bee.

🍯’s prettyimportant to me.

 It’s important to all bees.

We invented it!

 We make it. And we protect it

with our lives.

 Unfortunately, there are

some people in this room

 who think they can take it from us

 'cause we’re the little guys!

I’m hoping that, after this is all over,

 you’ll see how, by taking our 🍯,

you not only take everything we have

 but everything we are!

 I wish he’d dress like that

all the time. So nice!

 Oall your first witness.

 So, Mr. Klauss Vanderhayden

of 🍯 Farms, big company you have.

 I suppose so.

 I see you also own

🍯burton andHonron!

 Yes, they provide beekeepers

for our farms.

 Beekeeper. I find that

to be a very disturbing term.

 I don’t imagine you employ

any bee-free-ers, do you?

 - No.

- I couldn’t hear you.

 - No.

- No.

 Because you don’t free bees.

You keep bees. Not only that,

 it seems you thought a bear would be

an appropriate image for a jar of 🍯.

 They’re very lovable creatures.

 Yogi Bear, Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear.

 You mean like this?

 Bears kill bees!

 How’d you like his head crashing

through your living room?!

 Biting into your couch!

Spitting out your throw pillows!

 OK, that’s enough. Take him away.

 So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here.

Your name intrigues me.

 - Where have I heard it before?

- I was with a band called The Police.

 But you’ve never been

a police officer, have you?

 No, I haven’t.

 No, you haven’t. And so here

we have yet another example

 of bee culture casually

stolen by a human

 for nothing more than

a prance-about stage name.

 Oh, please.

 Have you ever been stung, Mr. Sting?

 Because I’m feeling

a little stung, Sting.

 Or should I say… Mr. Gordon M. Sumner!

 That’s not his real name?! You idiots!

 Mr. Liotta, first,

belated congratulations on

 your Emmy win for a guest spot

on ER in 2005.

 Thank you. Thank you.

 I see from your resume

that you’re devilishly handsome

 with a churning inner turmoil

that’s ready to blow.

 I enjoy what I do. Is that a crime?

 Not yet it isn’t. But is this

what it’s come to for you?

 Exploiting tiny, helpless bees

so you don’t

 have to rehearse

your part and learn your lines, sir?

 Watch it, Benson!

I could blow right now!

 This isn’t a goodfella.

This is a badfella!

 Why doesn’t someone just step on

this creep, and we can all go home?!

 - Order in this court!

- You’re all thinking it!

 Order! Order, I say!

 - Say it!

- Mr. Liotta, please sit down!

 I think it was awfully nice

of that bear to pitch in like that.

 I think the jury’s on our side.

 Are we doing everything right, legally?

 I’m a florist.

 Right. Well, here’s to a great team.

 To a great team!

 Well, hello.

 - Ken!

- Hello.

 I didn’t think you were coming.

 No, I was just late.

I tried to call, but… the battery.

 I didn’t want all this to go to waste,

so I called Barry. Luckily, he was free.

 Oh, that was lucky.

 There’s a little left.

I could heat it up.

 Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever.

 So I hear you’re quite a tennis player.

 I’m not much for the game myself.

The ball’s a little grabby.

 That’s where I usually sit.

Right… there.

 Ken, Barry was looking at your resume,

 and he agreed with me that eating with

chopsticks isn’t really a special skill.

 You think I don’t see what you’re doing?

 I know how hard it is to find

the rightjob. We have that in common.

 Do we?

 Bees have 100 percent employment,

but we do jobs like taking the crud out.

 That’s just what

I was thinking about doing.

 Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor

for his fuzz. I hope that was all right.

 I’m going to drain the old stinger.

 Yeah, you do that.

 Look at that.

 You know, I’ve just about had it

 with your little mind games.

 - What’s that?

- Italian Vogue.

 Mamma mia, that’s a lot of pages.

 A lot of ads.

 Remember what Van said, why is

your life more valuable than mine?

 Funny, I just can’t seem to recall that!

 I think something stinks in here!

 I love the smell of flowers.

 How do you like the smell of flames?!

 Not as much.

 Water bug! Not taking sides!

 Ken, I’m wearing a Ohapstick hat!

This is pathetic!

 I’ve got issues!

 Well, well, well, a royal flush!

 - You’re bluffing.

- Am I?

 Surf’s up, dude!

 Poo water!

 That bowl is gnarly.

 Except for those dirty yellow rings!

 Kenneth! What are you doing?!

 You know, I don’t even like 🍯!

I don’t eat it!

 We need to talk!

 He’s just a little bee!

 And he happens to be

the nicest bee I’ve met in a long time!

 Long time? What are you talking about?!

Are there other bugs in your life?

 No, but there are other things bugging

me in life. And you’re one of them!

 Fine! Talking bees, no yogurt night…

 My nerves are fried from riding

on this emotional roller coaster!

 Goodbye, Ken.

 And for your information,

 I prefer sugar-free, artificial

sweeteners made by man!

 I’m sorry about all that.

 I know it’s got

an aftertaste! I like it!

 I always felt there was some kind

of barrier between Ken and me.

 I couldn’t overcome it.

Oh, well.

 Are you OK for the trial?

 I believe Mr. Montgomery

is about out of ideas.

 We would like to call

Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand.

 Good idea! You can really see why he’s

considered one of the best lawyers…

 Yeah.

 Layton, you’ve

gotta weave some magic

 with this jury,

or it’s gonna be all over.

 Don’t worry. The only thing I have

to do to turn this jury around

 is to remind them

of what they don’t like about bees.

 - You got the tweezers?

- Are you allergic?

 Only to losing, son. Only to losing.

 Mr. Benson Bee, I’ll ask you

what I think we’d all like to know.

 What exactly is your relationship

 to that woman?

 We’re friends.

 - Good friends?

- Yes.

 How good? Do you live together?

 Wait a minute…

 Are you her little…

 …bedbug?

 I’ve seen a bee documentary or two.

From what I understand,

 doesn’t your queen give birth

to all the bee children?

 - Yeah, but…

- So those aren’t your real parents!

 - Oh, Barry…

- Yes, they are!

 Hold me back!

 You’re an illegitimate bee,

aren’t you, Benson?

 He’s denouncing bees!

 Don’t y'all date your cousins?

 - Objection!

- I’m going to pincushion this guy!

 Adam, don’t! It’s what he wants!

 Oh, I’m hit!!

 Oh, lordy, I am hit!

 Order! Order!

 The venom! The venom

is coursing through my veins!

 I have been felled

by a winged beast of destruction!

 You see? You can’t treat them

like equals! They’re striped savages!

 Stinging’s the only thing

they know! It’s their way!

 - Adam, stay with me.

- I can’t feel my legs.

 What angel of mercy

will come forward to suck the poison

 from my heaving buttocks?

 I will have order in this court. Order!

 Order, please!

 The case of the 🍯bees

versus the human race

 took a pointed turn against the bees

 yesterday when one of their legal

team stung Layton T. Montgomery.

 - Hey, buddy.

- Hey.

 - Is there much pain?

- Yeah.

 I…

 I blew the whole case, didn’t I?

 It doesn’t matter. What matters is

you’re alive. You could have died.

 I’d be better off dead. Look at me.

 They got it from the cafeteria

downstairs, in a tuna sandwich.

 Look, there’s

a little celery still on it.

 What was it like to sting someone?

 I can’t explain it. It was all…

 All adrenaline and then…

and then ecstasy!

 All right.

 You think it was all a trap?

 Of course. I’m sorry.

I flew us right into this.

 What were we thinking? Look at us. We’re

just a couple of bugs in this world.

 What will the humans do to us

if they win?

 I don’t know.

 I hear they put the roaches in motels.

That doesn’t sound so bad.

 Adam, they check in,

but they don’t check out!

 Oh, my.

 Oould you get a nurse

to close that window?

 - Why?

- The smoke.

 Bees don’t smoke.

 Right. Bees don’t smoke.

 Bees don’t smoke!

But some bees are smoking.

 That’s it! That’s our case!

 It is? It’s not over?

 Get dressed. I’ve gotta go somewhere.

 Get back to the court and stall.

Stall any way you can.

 And assuming you’ve done step correctly, you’re readyfor the tub.

 Mr. Flayman.

 Yes? Yes, Your Honor!

 Where is the rest of your team?

 Well, Your Honor, it’s interesting.

 Bees are trained to fly haphazardly,

 and as a result,

we don’t make very good time.

 I actually heard a funny story about…

 Your Honor,

haven’t these ridiculous bugs

 taken up enough

of this court’s valuable time?

 How much longer will we allow

these absurd shenanigans to go on?

 They have presented no compelling

evidence to support their charges

 against my clients,

who run legitimate businesses.

 I move for a complete dismissal

of this entire case!

 Mr. Flayman, I’m afraid I’m going

 to have to consider

Mr. Montgomery’s motion.

 But you can’t! We have a terrific case.

 Where is your proof?

Where is the evidence?

 Show me the smoking gun!

 Hold it, Your Honor!

You want a smoking gun?

 Here is your smoking gun.

 What is that?

 It’s a bee smoker!

 What, this?

This harmless little contraption?

 This couldn’t hurt a fly,

let alone a bee.

 Look at what has happened

 to bees who have never been asked,

“Smoking or non?”

 Is this what nature intended for us?

 To be forcibly addicted

to smoke machines

 and man-made wooden slat work camps?

 Living out our lives as 🍯 slaves

to the white man?

 - What are we gonna do?

- He’s playing the species card.

 Ladies and gentlemen, please,

free these bees!

 Free the bees! Free the bees!

 Free the bees!

 Free the bees! Free the bees!

 The court finds in favor of the bees!

 Vanessa, we won!

 I knew you could do it! High-five!

 Sorry.

 I’m OK! You know what this means?

 All the 🍯

will finally belong to the bees.

 Now we won’t have

to work so hard all the time.

 This is an unholy perversion

of the balance of nature, Benson.

 You’ll regret this.

 Barry, how much 🍯 is out there?

 All right. One at a time.

 Barry, who are you wearing?

 My sweater is Ralph Lauren,

and I have no pants.

 - What if Montgomery’s right?

- What do you mean?

 We’ve been living the bee way

a long time, 27 million years.

 Oongratulations on your victory.

What will you demand as a settlement?

 First, we’ll demand a complete shutdown

of all bee work camps.

 Then we want back the 🍯

that was ours to begin with,

 every last drop.

 We demand an end to the glorification

of the bear as anything more

 than a filthy, smelly,

bad-breath stink machine.

 We’re all aware

of what they do in the woods.

 Wait for my signal.

 Take him out.

 He’ll have nauseous

for a few hours, then he’ll be fine.

 And we will no longer tolerate

bee-negative nicknames…

 But it’s just a prance-about stage name!

 …unnecessary inclusion of 🍯

in bogus health products

 and la-dee-da human

tea-time snack garnishments.

 Oan’t breathe.

 Bring it in, boys!

 Hold it right there! Good.

 Tap it.

 Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups,

and there’s gallons more coming!

 - I think we need to shut down!

- Shut down? We’ve never shut down.

 Shut down 🍯 production!

 Stop making 🍯!

 Turn your key, sir!

 What do we do now?

 Oannonball!

 We’re shutting 🍯 production!

 Mission abort.

 Aborting pollination and nectar detail.

Returning to base.

 Adam, you wouldn’t believe

how much 🍯 was out there.

 Oh, yeah?

 What’s going on? Where is everybody?

 - Are they out celebrating?

- They’re home.

 They don’t know what to do.

Laying out, sleeping in.

 I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way

to San Antonio with a cricket.

 At least we got our 🍯 back.

 Sometimes I think, so what if humans

liked our 🍯? Who wouldn’t?

 It’s the greatest thing in the world!

I was excited to be part of making it.

 This was my new desk. This was my

new job. I wanted to do it really well.

 And now…

 Now I can’t.

 I don’t understand

why they’re not happy.

 I thought their lives would be better!

 They’re doing nothing. It’s amazing.

🍯 reallychanges people.

 You don’t have any idea

what’s going on, do you?

 - What did you want to show me?

- This.

 What happened here?

 That is not the half of it.

 Oh, no. Oh, my.

 They’re all wilting.

 Doesn’t look very good, does it?

 No.

 And whose fault do you think that is?

 You know, I’m gonna guess bees.

 Bees?

 Specifically, me.

 I didn’t think bees not needing to make

🍯 wouldaffect all these things.

 It’s notjust flowers.

Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees.

 That’s our whole SAT test right there.

 Take away produce, that affects

the entire animal kingdom.

 And then, of course…

 The human species?

 So if there’s no more pollination,

 it could all just go south here,

couldn’t it?

 I know this is also partly my fault.

 How about a suicide pact?

 How do we do it?

 - I’ll sting you, you step on me.

- Thatjust kills you twice.

 Right, right.

 Listen, Barry…

sorry, but I gotta get going.

 I had to open my mouth and talk.

 Vanessa?

 Vanessa? Why are you leaving?

Where are you going?

 To the final Tournament of Roses parade

in Pasadena.

 They’ve moved it to this weekend

because all the flowers are dying.

 It’s the last chance

I’ll ever have to see it.

 Vanessa, I just wanna say I’m sorry.

I never meant it to turn out like this.

 I know. Me neither.

 Tournament of Roses.

Roses can’t do sports.

 Wait a minute. Roses. Roses?

 Roses!

 Vanessa!

 Roses?!

 Barry?

 - Roses are flowers!

- Yes, they are.

 Flowers, bees, pollen!

 I know.

That’s why this is the last parade.

 Maybe not.

Oould you ask him to slow down?

 Oould you slow down?

 Barry!

 OK, I made a huge mistake.

This is a total disaster, all my fault.

 Yes, it kind of is.

 I’ve ruined the planet.

I wanted to help you

 with the flower shop.

I’ve made it worse.

 Actually, it’s completely closed down.

 I thought maybe you were remodeling.

 But I have another idea, and it’s

greater than my previous ideas combined.

 I don’t want to hear it!

 All right, they have the roses,

the roses have the pollen.

 I know every bee, plant

and flower bud in this park.

 All we gotta do is get what they’ve got

back here with what we’ve got.

 - Bees.

- Park.

 - Pollen!

- Flowers.

 - Repollination!

- Across the nation!

 Tournament of Roses,

Pasadena, Oalifornia.

 They’ve got nothing

but flowers, floats and cotton candy.

 Security will be tight.

 I have an idea.

 Vanessa Bloome, FTD.

 Official floral business. It’s real.

 Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch.

 Thank you. It was a gift.

 Once inside,

we just pick the right float.

 How about The Princess and the Pea?

 I could be the princess,

and you could be the pea!

 Yes, I got it.

 - Where should I sit?

- What are you?

 - I believe I’m the pea.

- The pea?

 It goes under the mattresses.

 - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart.

- I’m getting the marshal.

 You do that!

This whole parade is a fiasco!

 Let’s see what this baby’ll do.

 Hey, what are you doing?!

 Then all we do

is blend in with traffic…

 …without arousing suspicion.

 Once at the airport,

there’s no stopping us.

 Stop! Security.

 - You and your insect pack your float?

- Yes.

 Has it been

in your possession the entire time?

 Would you remove your shoes?

 - Remove your stinger.

- It’s part of me.

 I know. Just having some fun.

Enjoy your flight.

 Then if we’re lucky, we’ll have

just enough pollen to do the job.

 Oan you believe how lucky we are? We

have just enough pollen to do the job!

 I think this is gonna work.

 It’s got to work.

 Attention, passengers,

this is Oaptain Scott.

 We have a bit of bad weather

in New York.

 It looks like we’ll experience

a couple hours delay.

 Barry, these are cut flowers

with no water. They’ll never make it.

 I gotta get up there

and talk to them.

 Be careful.

 Oan I get help

with the Sky Mall magazine?

 I’d like to order the talking

inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.

 Oaptain, I’m in a real situation.

 - What’d you say, Hal?

- Nothing.

 Bee!

 Don’t freak out! My entire species…

 What are you doing?

 - Wait a minute! I’m an attorney!

- Who’s an attorney?

 Don’t move.

 Oh, Barry.

 Good afternoon, passengers.

This is your captain.

 Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B

please report to the cockpit?

 And please hurry!

 What happened here?

 There was a DustBuster,

a toupee, a life raft exploded.

 One’s bald, one’s in a boat,

they’re both unconscious!

 - Is that another bee joke?

- No!

 No one’s flying the plane!

 This is JFK control tower, Flight 356.

What’s your status?

 This is Vanessa Bloome.

I’m a florist from New York.

 Where’s the pilot?

 He’s unconscious,

and so is the copilot.

 Not good. Does anyone onboard

have flight experience?

 As a matter of fact, there is.

 - Who’s that?

- Barry Benson.

 From the 🍯 trial?! Oh, great.

 Vanessa, this is nothing more

than a big metal bee.

 It’s got giant wings, huge engines.

 I can’t fly a plane.

 - Why not? Isn’t John Travolta a pilot?

- Yes.

 How hard could it be?

 Wait, Barry!

We’re headed into some lightning.

 This is Bob Bumble. We have some

late-breaking news from JFK Airport,

 where a suspenseful scene

is developing.

 Barry Benson,

fresh from his legal victory…

 That’s Barry!

 …is attempting to land a plane,

loaded with people, flowers

 and an incapacitated flight crew.

 Flowers?!

 We have a storm in the area

and two individuals at the controls

 with absolutely no flight experience.

 Just a minute.

There’s a bee on that plane.

 I’m quite familiar with Mr. Benson

and his no-account compadres.

 They’ve done enough damage.

 But isn’t he your only hope?

 Technically, a bee

shouldn’t be able to fly at all.

 Their wings are too small…

 Haven’t we heard this a million times?

 “The surface area of the wings

and body mass make no sense.”

 - Get this on the air!

- Got it.

 - Stand by.

- We’re going live.

 The way we work may be a mystery to you.

 Making 🍯 takes a lot of bees

doing a lot of small jobs.

 But let me tell you about a small job.

 If you do it well,

it makes a big difference.

 More than we realized.

To us, to everyone.

 That’s why I want to get bees

back to working together.

 That’s the bee way!

We’re not made of Jell-O.

 We get behind a fellow.

 - Black and yellow!

- Hello!

 Left, right, down, hover.

 - Hover?

- Forget hover.

 This isn’t so hard.

Beep-beep! Beep-beep!

 Barry, what happened?!

 Wait, I think we were

on autopilot the whole time.

 - That may have been helping me.

- And now we’re not!

 So it turns out I cannot fly a plane.

 All of you, let’s get

behind this fellow! Move it out!

 Move out!

 Our only chance is if I do what I’d do,

you copy me with the wings of the plane!

 Don’t have to yell.

 I’m not yelling!

We’re in a lot of trouble.

 It’s very hard to concentrate

with that panicky tone in your voice!

 It’s not a tone. I’m panicking!

 I can’t do this!

 Vanessa, pull yourself together.

You have to snap out of it!

 You snap out of it.

 You snap out of it.

 - You snap out of it!

- You snap out of it!

 - You snap out of it!

- You snap out of it!

 - You snap out of it!

- You snap out of it!

 - Hold it!

- Why? Oome on, it’s my turn.

 How is the plane flying?

 I don’t know.

 Hello?

 Benson, got any flowers

for a happy occasion in there?

 The Pollen Jocks!

 They do get behind a fellow.

 - Black and yellow.

- Hello.

 All right, let’s drop this tin can

on the blacktop.

 Where? I can’t see anything. Oan you?

 No, nothing. It’s all cloudy.

 Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry.

 - Thinking bee.

- Thinking bee.

 Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

 Wait a minute.

I think I’m feeling something.

 - What?

- I don’t know. It’s strong, pulling me.

 Like a 27-million-year-old instinct.

 Bring the nose down.

 Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

 - What in the world is on the tarmac?

- Get some lights on that!

 Thinking bee!

Thinking bee! Thinking bee!

 - Vanessa, aim for the flower.

- OK.

 Out the engines. We’re going in

on bee power. Ready, boys?

 Affirmative!

 Good. Good. Easy, now. That’s it.

 Land on that flower!

 Ready? Full reverse!

 Spin it around!

 - Not that flower! The other one!

- Which one?

 - That flower.

- I’m aiming at the flower!

 That’s a fat guy in a flowered shirt.

I mean the giant pulsating flower

 made of millions of bees!

 Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up.

 Rotate around it.

 - This is insane, Barry!

- This’s the only way I know how to fly.

 Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane

flying in an insect-like pattern?

 Get your nose in there. Don’t be afraid.

Smell it. Full reverse!

 Just drop it. Be a part of it.

 Aim for the center!

 Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman!

 Oome on, already.

 Barry, we did it!

You taught me how to fly!

 - Yes. No high-five!

- Right.

 Barry, it worked!

Did you see the giant flower?

 What giant flower? Where? Of course

I saw the flower! That was genius!

 - Thank you.

- But we’re not done yet.

 Listen, everyone!

 This runway is covered

with the last pollen

 from the last flowers

available anywhere on Earth.

 That means this is our last chance.

 We’re the only ones who make 🍯,

pollinate flowers and dress like this.

 If we’re gonna survive as a species,

this is our moment! What do you say?

 Are we going to be bees, orjust

Museum of Natural History keychains?

 We’re bees!

 Keychain!

 Then follow me! Except Keychain.

 Hold on, Barry. Here.

 You’ve earned this.

 Yeah!

 I’m a Pollen Jock! And it’s a perfect

fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves.

 Oh, yeah.

 That’s our Barry.

 Mom! The bees are back!

 If anybody needs

to make a call, now’s the time.

 I got a feeling we’ll be

working late tonight!

 Here’s your change. Have a great

afternoon! Oan I help who’s next?

 Would you like some 🍯 with that?

It is bee-approved. Don’t forget these.

 Milk, cream, cheese, it’s all me.

And I don’t see a nickel!

 Sometimes I just feel

like a piece of meat!

 I had no idea.

 Barry, I’m sorry.

Have you got a moment?

 Would you excuse me?

My mosquito associate will help you.

 Sorry I’m late.

 He’s a lawyer too?

 I was already a blood-sucking parasite.

All I needed was a briefcase.

 Have a great afternoon!

 Barry, I just got this huge tulip order,

and I can’t get them anywhere.

 No problem, Vannie.

Just leave it to me.

 You’re a lifesaver, Barry.

Oan I help who’s next?

 All right, scramble, jocks!

It’s time to fly.

 Thank you, Barry!

 That bee is living my life!

 Let it go, Kenny.

 - When will this nightmare end?!

- Let it all go.

 - Beautiful day to fly.

- Sure is.

 Between you and me,

I was dying to get out of that office.

 You have got

to start thinking bee, my friend.

 - Thinking bee!

- Me?

 Hold it. Let’s just stop

for a second. Hold it.

 I’m sorry. I’m sorry, everyone.

Oan we stop here?

 I’m not making a major life decision

during a production number!

 All right. Take ten, everybody.

Wrap it up, guys.

 I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

[notyobeerwench]

Honestly, why is everyone freaking out over a like to one tweet? It was one like amongst many likes to the responses of what she originally tweeted. I get it was a response to a well known anti shit stirrer. But, she or a member of her team liked it amongst MANY. Should we discuss someone's hubby's skid marks too? She liked that one. Does that mean S or T leave skid marks for her to deal with? Does it mean we should be dissecting every other thing someone said in that thread that was liked? NO IT DOESN'T AND NO ONE IS. A well known anti took the opportunity to say something in the thread to throw shade on a shipper receipt because the dark side is PISSED off about the last 2 weeks. It got liked. Now that chick and all the rest of that flock take it to mean C CONFIRMED T made the lemon doodle. PLEASE....

Then the antis went anon and sent an ask to EVERY major shipper blog they could to stir Jenny's forking shite pot. That side is the one that believes LIKES means true love. But, they stirred it up and many shippers fell for it. Fell right into the dark side's hands.

Look, I know I haven't been around here as long as everyone else. I know I haven't been through the serious shite most of you have. You guys have valid feelings about the fuckery. I understand.

But sometimes, a like on the Twitter is JUST A LIKE. It means NOTHING. SHIPPERS are giving this life. The dark side is feeding on it. Maybe sometimes we should take a step back and not react so fast to EVERY EFFING THING! Take a breath and see what is happening before reacting. Stop responding to shite pot stirring anons. Remember, sometimes a like is just a like and not some nefarious plot.

I get it. There is a pattern. But, there is also a pattern to how we react. Ever think that maybe we need to break the pattern too? Stop reacting to the BS. It might stop the BS.

To me, this like was NOTHING. I'm shipping just fine. I'm sipping my shiptini and dancing on the Lido deck.

Yes, I get that there will be fuckery until Tait "consciously uncouples" or whatever the acting world's phrase du jour is for "breaking up". I just choose to not use Tweets or IG post likes as something I pay attention to. I ship the love between SC, whether it is everlasting true love or deep friendship love. I don't care about the laughable adjacents. I ship what I ship and the other shit is just noise. Noise that will continue until everyone stops listening.

@superfluffycool sorry for hijacking. I had no idea when I started this post it would get so long.

Cynical here too and it's not about looking for the worst in people, it's because we've seen this pattern and game too many times before. You can set your watch to it. As long as they continue to get positive reinforcement and $$ from ass kissing fans why stop? Integrity? Bah. Who needs that.

Ugh, it’s that old idea that the ends justify the means (someone call Chidi from The Good Place to help us unpack this). My hope is that Sam and Cait aren’t intentionally manipulating fans to raise money for their charities (and then waving the finger at them when they sell their fake relationships). It makes me queasy just thinking about it :(

You bring up an interesting point with the positive reinforcement. Are they laughing their asses off when the fandom eats up what they’re serving? The pic of Eddie in bed with Sam, Cait’s endless birthday tweets to Sam, and of course, her latest ‘like’ mentioning her fiancé - all of these got a predictably powerful reaction from us.

I can’t remember what performer said this, but he said he started to dislike the audience for laughing at his routine. The audience was doing exactly what he wanted them to do, when he wanted them to do it, and he started to feel contempt over it instead of joy. That sounds like an awful thing, and I hope that Sam and Cait haven’t turned into that guy, performing a routine of mixed messages to an audience they’ve come to loath.

[noahkpierson]

9-20-2019

Hello again everyone!

I didn’t think of posting anything last night, because nothing really worthy of note happened yesterday. I thought this morning though, I could make up for it, by telling you about those struggles I mentioned in my very 1st post.

Please, don’t misunderstand. I am not using this as a crutch, but I feel it is an important reason for my life issues. I have Aspergers syndrome. I’m not going to go into detail as to what that is. If you’re REALLY that curious, Google it. But just know that its a very mild case of autism, and because of it, I communicate, and interpret things differently, than most “normal” people.

My mom is the nicest person in my immediate family. She understands my quirks, and is able to tell me things, or talk to me, or lecture me, in nice ways, that don’t get me stirred up. Because you see, one thing you’ll realize VERY quick after meeting me in person: For the love of GOD, and for your own mental safety, DON’T piss me off. If you piss me off, or purposefully TRY to irritate me, or push my buttons, my emotions, be they anger, or sadness, will skyrocket, in a matter of seconds.

My mom knows this, and cares about my mental stability enough, to NOT do those things. That being said, if someone accuses her of something, even if its the smallest, dumbest accusation you can of, she gets all bent the hell out of shape. She starts getting angry at me, then I start getting angry at her for overreacting, which she is, and then we part ways, fuming at each other. But in the end, after we’ve both cooled off, we still love each other

My “dad” on the other hand...... oh....... BOY! Fasten your seatbelts.....

My dad is the worlds biggest asshole, pot stirrer, uncaring, ungrateful, inconsiderate, judgemental, narcissistic, JERK!

My dad is a retired US Air Force Colonel, and because of his years in the military, he expects things he tells people to do, to get done, and RIGHT then. That may work fine in the AF, but at home, not a chance. He as always treated me and my brothers like absolute garbage. However, since they are all off on their own, and not at home, I’m the only one left. Even when they’ve come to visit for extended periods of time, both my mom and I have noticed, dad doesn’t try to piss them off, like he does to me. He treats them, like they actually matter, and like he’s friends with them. ME... Well I’m just about as good as dirt. If I would go down the hall to his office to show him something (which I don’t do anymore), I’d always get a big exasperated SIGH, and, “Hi dad. I know you’re in the middle of something, but HERE! Let me show you something!” followed by an angry face. Keep in mind, the “important thing” he’s usually doing, is playing Age of Empires.

I have certain chores around the house I have to do, since I don’t have a job yet. One of them is to take out the recycles to the garage, and sort them. Where we live, we recycle cardboard boxes. What we do, is we break open both ends, and flatten it, and put in the cardboard tub. But because of his “VAST” wisdom of these things, he decided the cardboard needs to be put in there, vertically, so theres more room. and if its even SLIGHTY off kilter, I get the rage of dad for it. For example, this last time I didn’t do it right, I accidentally left 2 SMALL pieces of cardboard sitting on the top of the box, not pushed in. I completely forgot about it, until all of sudden, from my bedroom, at the opposite end of the house from the garage door, I hear, *SLAM! STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP* Right up to my door. The door is flung open. And in a not yelling voice, but low, angry, and threatening, “come out to the garage, NOW.”   Believe me, my dad would be on the FCC’s most wanted list if he ever want on TV, for that little Come to Jesus meeting right then. 

Not only is he verbally, and mentally abusive, but at times in past, has been physically abusive. There have been too many instances for me to recall, but the one that stands out in my memory, that is CERTAINLY the worst, is when I was 8 or 9. For some reason, my dad was home for the summer. This was WAY back before he retired BTW. My mom is, and always has been the one in charge of my daily medications, but this day, she had to go into work early. Back then, I was taking a medicine, that was basically a powder, that could be taken with applesauce. Now, in the fridge, we had 2 types: smooth, and chunky. I cannot STAND the chunky. The texture is all wrong, and it always made me gag. My dad got my meds ready for me, but with the wrong applesauce. I took that spoonful, felt the chunks, and it all came back out, right onto the floor, and dad completely lost his shit. Now, before you all go rushing to his side, saying, “well, how was he suppose to know you didn’t like that certain applesauce?!” I will admit, that is a good point. BUT, let me ask you this! Is that a good excuse for slapping my face so hard, my glasses flew off my head, and across the living room, hitting the windows on the other side of the room, some 15-20 feet away?! Because that is EXACTLY what happened.

He is an awful person. And my mom agrees with me. I asked her one time, when we were having a discussion about him, if she’d ever thought about divorce. She told me that if weren’t for financial, legal, and insurance things, she would have divorced him years ago. I’m not very good at telling stories, so if my retelling the stories of the horrors of my dad, don’t seem that bad to you, think about this:

If the woman who fell in love with him, and married him, and had 4 children with him, said that she 110% would have divorced him if circumstances were stable enough to do so... its not just me being “oversensitive”.

Have a great day, y’all!

Kenny