#she’s just slightly less codependent. which let’s be honest is probably healthy.
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gilmores-glorious-blog · 2 years ago
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genuinely so unwell thinking about how there’s such an emphasis placed on vax being the one who needs his sister, who asks her to not go far from him, who is nothing without her. vex is the one who’s always been more independent, vax says it himself: she doesn’t need him. but in the end, vax is the one who leaves. and vex doesn’t realize just how much she needed her brother until it’s too late.
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What's your opinion of marco/tobias? My friend basically had me thinking about how it could have possibly worked if the (slightly unhealthy I may add) rachel/tobias relationship hadn't spawned.
I love to speculate about Marco/Tobias — they’re probably my rarepair OTP.  Their interaction in the back half of the series is AMAZING because it absolutely shows how much they’ve grown as people over the course of the war and how codependent mutually supportive that team has become.
That said, I don’t think that Tobias or Marco would be healthier if they were a couple.  Rachel might be a deeply flawed human being, but she’s also infinitely better than Marco at recognizing and handling her own and others’ emotional crap.  She’s not only good at discerning things like her dad’s fear of loneliness after moving (#7) and Melissa’s insecurities about letting friends visit her house (#2) but also has a wonderfully no-nonsense response style.  When the going gets tough, Rachel gets going.  When she can tell that Cassie and Jake’s crush is mutual and is also going to die on the vine without intervention, she goes so far as to ask Cassie out on Jake’s behalf and then accept Jake’s invitation on Cassie’s behalf (#29).  When she knows that Marco needs reassurance that he did the right thing by letting Visser One go, she “hears” an escape submarine — and then yells at Marco for being such a doofus he missed hearing it too (#15).  She’s brutally honest about the fact that Cassie shoves off responsibility onto others and then judges them for taking that responsibility (#48) and in pointing out that Marco needs closure almost more than he needs his mom back (#30).  This is a girl who beats her enemies to death with her own severed arm (#33), shamelessly cries during weddings (#35), goes into squealing enthusiast mode over mall sales (#16), commits murder to protect her friends (#48, #54) and utterly refuses to apologize for any of it.
To be clear, that directness is not always a strength — she verges on meanness when calling Ax out for latching onto the first andalite authority figure who comes along in #18, and her take-no-crap style of discourse hurts her mom in #50 almost as much as it helps Jake in #53 — but it’s also a lot of what Tobias needs.  Rachel shows up uninvited with a McDonald’s bag when she realizes that Tobias’s meadow is running out of food, and announces that he can eat first and worry about her babying him later (#49).  She shrugs off the revelation that he eats roadkill (#13) and remembers his birthday even when he has himself forgotten it (#23).  Frankly, Tobias needs that level of bluntness in his life.  He’s the kind of person who overthinks everything, even to the point of almost getting himself killed because he’s too busy debating the symbolism of eating a snake after a snake almost ate him to see a guy standing ten feet away with a bow and arrow (#49) and who goes to ridiculous lengths to avoid depending on others for help to protect his own pride (#3, #54).  Not only does Tobias provide Rachel with a much-needed dose of acceptance and support (X, X) but Rachel effectively cuts through Tobias’s crap enough to tell him outright that she can tell he’s struggling and that she’s going to help him whether he likes it or not.
By contrast, Marco frequently goes too far when teasing Tobias in the early books (#3 and Marco all-but saying outright he’d rather die than end up like Tobias, #10 and the joke about roadkill as movie snacks, #12 and some of the problematic comments about Rachel and Tobias’s relationship) and then tries to tell himself that Tobias will brush it off.  Marco also tends to perceive Tobias as having it “easy” for having a sexy girlfriend and not going to school (or at the very least he claims he sees Tobias as having it easy) meaning that he’s not great at supporting Tobias during some of the tough emotional moments Tobias deals with during #33 and #43 especially.  Yes, there’s that awesome moment in #49 with Marco pulling Tobias aside after the discussion about whether or not to save Loren and basically saying “I’ve been in your shoes, and no matter what you decide — to save her or to let her be a controller — I’m going to support you 100% because I know there are no good choices here.”  There’s also the even awesomer moment in #3 when Marco throws the baseball through the roof of the mall to save Tobias’s life.  However, those seem to be the exception rather than the rule.  It’s notable that in #54 Marco fails pretty miserably at providing any kind of emotional support to either Jake or Tobias, and that in #35 he responds to Cassie worrying about Tobias with an effective “meh, whatever, we all have problems.”
To be clear, Marco has definitely moved Tobias from the category of “person who I would casually murder to achieve my own ends” to “person for whom I would happily set myself on fire” (which, let’s be honest, are the only two types of people in Marco’s book) by the time the series is in its mid-30s.  There’s no single turning point that you can easily pull out, because K.A. Applegate does slow-and-steady character development LIKE A BOSS, but it’s fascinating to watch the shift.  As late as #15 they’re willing to be unbelievably mean to each other when both trapped in a crappy situation — Tobias’s crack about Marco having a soft spot for Visser One is probably the most cringe-inducing, but Marco’s 40 different variations on “what’re you, scared?” as Tobias gets ready to go underwater for the first time are almost as bad.  As early as #30 they’re an incredibly effective team whose surface-level snark barely conceals a deep and genuine mutual affection — they build off each other during that ridiculous conversation about hackysack, work together to keep Rachel from going off the rails after Jake and Cassie are “killed,” and trust each other well enough to cede control back and forth during their reconnaissance mission.  By #33 Marco proves willing to let himself get stabbed to protect Tobias, and by #51 they’re actively seeking out each other’s company while also avoiding the Berensons.  (The two of them sitting back and watching both Jake and Rachel self-implode while doing nothing to try and help is Exhibit A as to why they can’t emotionally support each other, by the by.)
Marco and Tobias like each other.  They work well together.  They’re hilarious and adorable.  They’d make a freaking awesome couple.  I could read about them interacting all day long.  I want them to steal a tank and drive off into the sunset and live happily ever after in a land of infinite rabbits and zero poodles.
I just also think that Tobias definitely, Marco maybe, would be less healthy than they are in canon, assuming they were a couple.
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spotlightsaga · 7 years ago
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Kevin Cage of @spotlightsaga reviews... I Love Dick (S01E05) A Short History of Weird Girls Airdate: May 17, 2017 @amazonvideo Ratings: Privatized Ratings @amazon Score: 9.75/10 TVTime/FB/Twitter/Tumblr/Path/Pin: @SpotlightSaga **********SPOILERS BELOW********** The more I watch television... The more I write, review, observe, soak in, and immerse myself into what I'm watching the more I drop certain series, and cling to ones that stir up a thunderous rumble of emotions inside of me. Like Dick's art, sometimes those emotions don't have a name. Maybe they're new, maybe their not, but I feel those emotions with such a surging intensity that I know what I'm watching is beyond just a tv series and literally a piece of moving art, cinematic wonders that maybe aren't for everyone, but sure as hell should be. Amazon Studios' 'I Love Dick' is a special series, one of those rare entries that match and sometimes even surpasses its original source material. This series is literally the equivalent of females embracing their very fiber, their sexual being, and shouting out loud on the top of a mountain, echoing through a massive valley, stirring up birds and wildlife... As if to say, 'I'm here and this is who I am. I will not be shamed.' Although I'm a male, and my sexuality is of a different multi-colored variety, I connect with these women and somehow understand them on an enormously supreme level. 'A Short History of Weird Girls' is 'I Love Dick's masterpiece. As you may have noticed, and as I mentioned earlier, Ive changed the way I watch television. I've been holding onto this series, as I have with others... I actually have watched, documented, and written nearly a hundred unreleased articles. I review them, tweak them, add to them, sculpt them... Because much like this show, my writing has evolved, the way I watch tv has evolved, and the way I release these pieces I've written on these shows have evolved. This episode is somewhat in the vein of last years 'B.A.N' from Donald Glover's FX masterpiece 'Atlanta', in the sense that the core narrative takes a back seat and we are given a whole new point of view from the female characters within the series. Not everyone will see this for what this is, and some may even ridicule my interpretation & impressions, but 'A Short History of Weird Girls' is high art and should be viewed, handled, and studied as such. The more I watch 'I Love Dick' the more I see it's many different layers... It's hyper-feminine POV is Jill Soloway & Chris Kraus' alternative to HBO's hyper-masculine lens we see the show 'Ballers' through. Both shows are under appreciated, and besides that fact, the only thing that they have in common is their extreme opposite handling of how we see their worlds. Maybe 'I Love Dick' is actually less of a feminist masterpiece and more of a honest, existential, tribute to an open, bold, unchained and aggressive look at female sexuality... Sexuality in general, and where embracing it can take us. It makes me long for a truly honest look at the male take on sexuality, but 'Ballers' and it's earnest admissions that masculinity can so easily drive towards toxic levels with a snap of a finger, I know my wish is probably losing its way in the wind... At least for now. What if everyone wrote Dick letters? Chris Kraus (Kathryn Hahn) poses an interesting question at the very beginning of the episode and then suddenly that reality comes to life in one of the most vibrant, sexually charged and sensual episodes of television not only in 2017, but ever. Yes, people are throwing around the word 'Revolutionary' when it comes to 'I Love Dick' because that's exactly what it is. People as a whole never quite grasp 'revolutionary' at first do they? Chris starts off her letter at the beginning, as all characters do, and we join them on their individual journeys of sexual awakening & personal drive. She talks about her time in high school, her willingness to literally give herself to anyone, male or female, but never having any takers. Finally during her College Years, she's taken, fucked. That first encounter intoxicates her... What is it that made this man want her so badly? What was it that he found beautiful? Her mind wonders to all the things he doesn't mention, after all, we are insecure beings... Even the most confident person in the room has something in the back of their mind that they compensate for. We are imperfect... But for me, that's exactly what I find so perfect about the human form.... Imperfections, Sadness, a little bit of crazy, 'cuz, aren't we all? Chris, Devon (Roberta Colindrez), Paula (Lily Mojekwu), and Toby (India Menuez) all share their letters to Dick, chronicling his particular effects on their lives... Sexually and otherwise. They recall past lovers, current ones that they feel strong disconnect with, and that disconnect is chronicled with images of both positive and negative experiences. As the experiences head into more heartbreaking territory, or difficult memories to interpret, their sexual escapades are shown and the women are erased leaving a fading, cartoonish like presence of each woman as they are entangled with their lovers or the confusion with their burgeoning sexuality... Much like the short film 'Removed' that this very episode opens with where Tribeca Film Festival 'Jury Award' Nominee & experimental filmmaker, Naomi Uman, creates a series of clips of vintage porn and erases the women's images using fingernail polish remover. Each women's entry is captivating for separate reasons and encapsulates the Bright Eye's brainchild and this generations' Bob Dylan, Connor Oberst, idea that 'every heads a different world'. Sexuality is unique to every one person, male and female, and it's so goddamn refreshing to see, hear, and feel the lusty, powerful force of honesty in approach when it comes to sexual identity. Chris strikes up the dialogue as straight forward as it gets, "Dear Dick, I've been horny since I was six. I used to press my crotch into the belly of my stuffed rhino in the family room of our duplex in Cleveland, Ohio. I loved to hump him in front of our sitter Karen Harris. I used to say that Rhino was hungry and that I needed to feed him... And then Karen went away to college and I didn't feel like doing it anymore." As humans, we ARE sexual beings... Aren't you tired of feeling ashamed of certain impulses that occur naturally within your body? Even before I was six I had these feelings. My situation may have been unique and incredibly polarizing to the majority, and most likely this isn't the show, or should I say segment, to discuss every detail as to how I got to that point so early. It wouldn't exactly be considered a natural occurrence... But even my situation is more common than most people would like to admit, or flat out refuse to admit. All I know is that children should not be punished for acting on these impulses in an innocent manner. We should be asking more questions as to how they got there, but unfortunately people don't want to hear that answer. We are not disgusting or wrong for thinking about sex. Creating a taboo around certain subjects just catapults those very subjects into a high number of internet searches and 'behind-closed-doors' fetishes. Relationships are not as easy as everyone wants them to be. Monogamy might not exactly be obtainable the way most will it to be. Our desires for inclusiveness may just stem from a melodramatic inherited human trait of selfishness, an unwillingness to let those grow around us, because we want to own something. Whether its a relationship or a person within that relationship, the idea that it's "yours" is actually absurd. We can devote ourselves to someone, but in the end we are human. There are certain voids that exist in this life that we need to fill, as animals, as human beings. That's not to say someone can't sustain a healthy relationship with another for 50+ years, its just to say that we all have our own paths. Even if as people our paths are destined to intertwine... Like Devon and Chris... We still must continue to grow and move forward at our own rates, careful to not become codependent. Devon talks about Dick's strong masculine energy as something she embraces and emulates (unlike Chris who wants to take it in any which way she can), turning bits and pieces of it into her own. She uses that 'Dick Swag' to woo other women for sport, but when she falls in love away at college and her heart is broken she drops out of school and tosses her dreams out behind her on her way back to Texas. But it's there where Devon meets Chris and suddenly becomes inspired, tho briefly distracted by the free spirited, India. It's India who sees Dick as or through yet another color of light, Chris' is glowing red, Devon's an iridescent indigo, India's color is much more difficult... A damaged, slightly cracked, creamy shade of yellow... She had an intellectually and creatively stimulating home in New Mexico but her father, John Willis (played by People of Earth's Luka Jones) is a writer of children's books, so therefore felt like he could touch her. India doesn't seem too affected by this as she rattles it off like a cold, but natural fact of life. And here is where I once again am inspired to tell you, the reader, who may or may not know what that feels like... Suddenly the place where I talk about 'my situation' and deem Chris' experience close to mine, but an insufficient place to explore even a second of my experience becomes much more real... And much more appropriate. You see, like India, some of us are taught how to act on sexual behaviors at a young age. We all don't just experiment naturally like Paula, who talks about how seeing her mother's tampon string suddenly pushes her away from her youthful obsession of her mother or how masturbating at a young age became uninteresting once she learned there was a name for it... Hence Paula's infatuation for Dick's massive protruding, structural masculine art that has no name, no specific identity, no title... Some of us have a bit of a push, or an inappropriate 'class', if you will. India seems to be a 'victim' of non-violent sexual abuse as a young child. This is where things get very fucking confusing, because you see... As I mentioned before, India quickly rattles off this fact and sweeps on to the next. Why is that? In my own personal experience, it's extremely difficult to decipher just what sexual abuse is, especially when one isn't physically hurt or 'traditionally forced' into anything. I've written on the subject before and was met with polarizing responses. One young woman asked if she could take me home recently and drove me through the busy intersecting freeways, highways, backroad byways, and long winding ramps & roundabouts from the west end of Miami all the way to the tip of coastal Miami Beach, all the while with tears in her eyes relating to my written experiences, giving me a vivid account of her own. No one wants to see themselves as a victim, not REAL victims anyway. This idea of 'victim culture' is scoffed at by those who have been through it. Some of us may be victims, but we refuse to let that define us, or use it to try and gain sympathy or attention, applying it to causes or whatever it may be, because then suddenly we are admitting defeat or are forever trapped in those moments. The same moments we rarely tell anyone, or ever express. So when my words were recently met with disdain and accusations that I was trying to define sexual abuse in any way, I simply had to laugh. Once again, 'Every head is a different world'. The spectrum is huge, but I personally will not allow myself to be a victim, just like India it's a passing fact, it happened, it's part of my story... But you can't have it, it can't be more than what I'm giving it now... And my experience is simply one example, as is any other. Although slightly damaged, and beautiful in that fact, India captivates all in her presence... Unfortunately she leaves them a bit broken, just as she is. Trudging on, she turns porn into art at Columbia University, even centering her final undergrad thesis around the shapes of a woman's face as she sucks two cocks. For her PHD, she presented a written & visual presentation of what's known as 'gaping' in pornography. If you don't know what that is and you haven't watched the show, I'll let you explore that one at your own discretion. Her professors are a bit horrified and one even suggests she moves towards Gender Studies, much like India I would have laughed that off. I've always found such subjects to be pretentious and divisive, but hey, that's me. As a male, and according to one troll on the #BoilerRoom's comment section who took offense (and hammered down my context) to comments I made during an Oakland, CA show where one of the worst DJ Sets I've ever seen took place on a grand platform (that most people would kill to have) by some wealthy, frankly bored looking hopeful (whose passion and talents self-admittedly lie elsewhere), "I'm a 'washed up raver cis-male' who can't accept females in positions of power" (boy, he got that one comically incorrect, welcome to the 2017, age of the Internet). My comments were light and I was even trying to be supportive, saying that maybe that DJ could get better in time, my point was that she had gained that opportunity through either knowing someone or good looks. Men have created that opportunity for women to use, and I'm not saying that it isn't a legitimate way in... But my comments were taken out of context. You should be able to perform however you want, looking however you wan... But without passion, you are simply taking up an opportunity for the next person in line. A bit of research indicated she has had the opposite road of some of my strong, female musician acquaintances and friends of whom I list as fierce inspirations of my own work (however I do not and would never take away the common denominator of the grand, all-relatable human struggle). I have called upon & channeled the inspirations of women like long time Indianapolis & Midwest treasure, Techno Powerhouse, DJ Shiva, or now worldwide success and frankly G.O.A.T. House Music Legend, The Black Madonna. These women worked so hard & sacrificed so much & never rested on their laurels. I am inspired by strong females, but I don't necessarily see them as just females, I see them as human beings, who like me, have had to work a little harder to get where they're at. No one has handed me anything, and many times when I had something, I blew it. We are all working against something, someone, ourselves, time... My inspirations in life are a direct product of my environment, just like the different presentations of myself over the years. And no one will take away my freedom of speech, right to an opinion (whether it's agreed with or not), or use a term like 'cis-male' to insinuate that I don't understand what it's like to be discriminated against, to be confused about who and what I am, the complexities of human sexuality, and so on and so forth. I often tell people about my first experience in Chicago at the age of 12. I went to the Art Institute of Chicago with a large group of my fellow schoolmates, but i broke free from the pack and wondered into rooms unaccompanied. I found myself suddenly surrounded by 'Impressionist & Post-Impressionist' Paintings, peppered with Medieval & Renaissance Art. My eyes centered on this massive painting that literally popped out of the wall, surrounded by a low lying rope, to keep people away from its magnificence, but their view unobstructed... It was Georges Seurat's 1884 pointillist painting 'A Sunday Afternoon on La Grande Jatte. I felt small and insignificant, like one of the pinpoint dots that made up what seemed like a million little dots that made up the painting. I've always had trouble describing that memorable moment, but Paula knocked it out in one line while describing how Dick's art made her feel, "It evoked in me a feeling of boundlessness... It was fucking terrifying." Yes, that's exactly it. 'Dear Great Man, Genius, Loner, Cowboy', India lists off Dick's accomplishments in the most condescending tone she can possibly channel. India had previously known of Dick through the Art History books her parents had lying around the house. Dick's was her favorite, not in the normal sense. She is young. She has known pain. She has worked hard to get where she is at. India is beautiful, but she doesn't use that to her advantage to succeed. She takes the hardest route possible, because she simply doesn't want what everyone else wants and she knows that anything worth having in this life doesn't come free... And that's something I can connect to. 'Dear Dick, We are not far from your doorstep.' Yasss, Queen! Jill Soloway just directed a fn' knockout... And the all female writing staff, this one headed by Annie Baker and Heidi Schreck deserve a Spotlight Saga nomination for Achievement in Writing... And Soloway for Directing. India's final words to Dick sent a surge of electricity through my body. This is exactly how I look at the AV Club. Knock Knock.
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astudyinchocolate · 2 years ago
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“#anyways. 🙃 #I’ve always thought about this but the way they did episode 3 just made it so painfully clear #also let it be known that I’m in no way saying that vex is a bad sister and she doesn’t need/love her brother #she’s just slightly less codependent. which let’s be honest is probably healthy.”
tags from OP! and yess
genuinely so unwell thinking about how there’s such an emphasis placed on vax being the one who needs his sister, who asks her to not go far from him, who is nothing without her. vex is the one who’s always been more independent, vax says it himself: she doesn’t need him. but in the end, vax is the one who leaves. and vex doesn’t realize just how much she needed her brother until it’s too late.
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