#she’s an oc from a story I’ve been developing with friends

[kingofbodyrolls]

Taehyung fic recs 2023

In honor of Taehyung’s birthday, I want to share my ultimate favorite Taehyung fanfictions, that I’ve read this year 💜I haven’t read that much of Taehyung, just recently gotten into it, so the list might be short, so I’ll leave some of the fics I’m really excited to read from my ‘to read’ list 💎 I want to thank each and every writer on this list for creating such wonderful stories and art - you are truly amazing ✨ All the fics on this list hold a dear place in my heart 🥹

❗Most of these fics are smutty as hell or contains dark themes, so minors dni.❗ 

If you read anything on this list and you like it, please leave a comment to the writer or reblog the original fic’s post 💜And if you want more fic recs you can follow me to stay updated 🙂

BTS fic rec index → May | Jun | Jul | Aug | Sep (jjk)(knj) | Oct (pjm) | Nov (*) | Dec (ksj)(💜) |

Emoji meaning → angst = 🌩️, smut = 🥵, fluff = 🥰, comedy = 😂, yandere = 😈, thriller/dark = 👻. 

⭐One of the Boys by @littlemisskookie // kth x f.reader // childhoodfriends!au, slice of life, bestfriends!au, neighbors!au, high school!au // 🌩️🥵🥰

📝 All your life you wanted only one thing- for Kim Taehyung to like you. You did everything you could to make this happen, from picking up his hobbies and rejecting anything feminine. But who do you start to become when you stop trying to impress him?

🗨️ Woaw! This was so incredibly good, it’s almost hard to describe, but I’ll try: it does a brilliant job at setting the story up, following oc and Taehyung since childhood, and how their friendship develops over time (and their feelings). It’s really cute and funny and with great smut at the end. Overall a brilliantly good read 💯

⭐Baby, Oh Baby by @jungkookiebus // kth x f.reader // established relationship, noneidol!au // 🥵🥰

📝 Taehyung and you have been trying for months to get pregnant; you’ve tried crazy diets, stuck to your calendar, got him to diet, but it’s all been for nothing. No matter how healthy your doctor says you are, you can’t conceive. Taehyung tries everything within his power to show you that everything is going to be okay and for one night he makes you forget all about the calendars, schedules, and all the crazy things that came with you trying to have a baby. 

🗨️ This was just really cute and loving 🥹The smut was also just ❤️‍🔥💯

⭐Baby Maker by @kookslastbutton // kth x f.reader // marriage!au // 🥵🥰

📝 You're pissed at your husband for being late to your weekly baby-making sessions.

🗨️ Aish, the smut in this 🔥Also all the dirty talk really had me going 🥵

⭐Under wraps by @jungkxook // kth x f.reader // e2l, fake dating // 🥵🥰

📝 There’s nothing you and taehyung seem to hate more than each other - except for christmas. having recently been dumped by your (now ex) boyfriend only seems to make this holiday even worse. but when taehyung suggests that you should pretend to be dating each other to save you both the embarrassment, pity, and bothersome questions from family and friends alike for a fun carefree month of celebrations, you can’t possibly say no.

🗨️ I just love me some good enemies to lovers AU 🥵 the relationship between OC and tae is really good, I think the tension between them was well built 👏🏾 I loved how their relationship unfolded and grew through their fake dating 🥹 the way OC realized she had feelings for him, but he had showed her before in his subtle moves, how much more he relaxed in her presence. I loved the interaction between oc and tae’s parents too, the way that they could obviously tell that OC was head over heels 😂 ah just, It was really really good! It was funny, it was comforting, and such a lovely read around Christmas! And the smut was sweet and tender (also hot!) 😍 a really great fic that I’ll add to my Christmas re-reads for years to come ✨ I loved it! Please go read it if you haven’t already 🥹

⭐Farmer boy, I Love You by @strawberrynamjoon // kth x f.reader // farming!au, lowkey e2l // 🥵😂

📝 Needing change in your life you decided it would be a brilliant idea to move to your uncle’s small farm, helping him and your cousin Jimin with the daily work. What you didn’t plan was to fall in love with your beautiful yet very annoying neighbour Taehyung, who seemed to make it his personal mission to tease you every chance he got. And what you expected even less was that he seemed to like you too.

🗨️ This was just utterly sweet, so fluffy 🥺 I really liked this: the way that reader and Taehyung’s friendship deepens, their friends and their banter 🥺 everything was so good, soft, sad sometimes, and just really great and funny too 🤭

⭐The Wannabe-Photographer Chronicles [series] by @gimmethatagustd // kth x f.reader // frenemies to lovers // 🥵

📝 You’re so tired of Kim Taehyung’s hipster, wannabe-photographer ass. You’re so tired of Kim Taehyung’s stupid smile and stupid jokes and stupid way of getting under your skin and sticking in your brain.

🗨️ At first I did not realize that this was a series, therefore I’ve linked to the masterlist, lol. Anyway, this series is just so fucking hot, like WHAT 🥵 There’s a lot of banter and their mutual ‘hatred’ for each other just makes this hit incredible hard. Really amazing ✨

⭐Loverboy by @kookslastbutton // kth x f.reader // established relationship // 🥵🥰🌩️

📝 After a startling conversation with your coworkers, you start feeling insecure about your sexual prowess. You don't initiate as much, you haven't worn lingerie yet, and you're still timid about doing much seducing with your body–are you giving your boyfriend boring sex? Taehyung reassures you that you are perfect and have nothing to worry about.

🗨️ These coworkers gotta go, okay?! 😠🤣 Planting seeds of doubt in OC’s head, no, no. Tae to the rescue!! He is so sweet in this too, yes a real ‘loverboy’ 😍 Gosh and then best friend Jimin - that was just pure gold, their relationship and how he helps OC 🥹 That is friendship goals!! A sweet, loving and comforting Taehyung fic - I loved it ✨

⭐Hush, yeah? [series; ongoing/hiatus] by @kithtaehyung // kth x f.reader // brother’s best friend!au, music festival!au // 🥵

📝 Who knew an innocent accident could turn things so dirty..

🗨️ Pure gold ✨ — I don’t really have much to say, except GO READ IT.

For all of the other lovely fics that I haven’t gotten around to read, but I’m very excited about, I’ve compiled my ‘to read’ list 🙂

‘To read’ list ⬇️

Maybe I do [series; completed] by @chateautae

Gold Rush by @ditttiii

Fanservice by @bangtanintotheroom

Trip by @daechwitatamic

The Art of Obsession by @kooktrash

Dick on the Go by @jeonggukingdom

Love me or we both go down by @gukyi

Gank Mid Lane by @kth1

Good for Me by @icedmatchatae

Something about him by @kooktrash

Love, secret Santa by @jamaisjoons

All I Want for Christmas is You by @ladyartemesia

Buzzed [series; completed] by @junqkook

I’m so sorry that I didn’t get to read more! 😭 Life happened, and yeah. But all of these wonderful fics on my list sound so incredibly good and I really look forward to reading them and give them a lovely review 💜

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TAEHYUNG!!! 💜 🥳 🎂

[thejournalisttintin]

I am also doing a few drawings of canon Tintin characters. But with schoolwork and stuff, I only have so little time…! 😩

First things first, here is my boy Chang!

I wasn’t sure how I would go about drawing him, since it’s been so long since I’ve drawn him.

Thanks to a post that @professorcalculusstanaccount made before on how to draw Chang, I was able to try my hand at drawing him. But with this one, I added my own drawing style.

So here he is!

And with a drawing, there will also be headcanons!

Headcanons for my interpretation of Chang:

After the events of Tintin in Tibet, Chang had stayed with Tintin and Haddock for a while before he eventually made the trip to London to visit his uncle. He took a train instead of a plane, as he had developed some trauma from having survived the plane crash in the Himalayas.

Several years later, Chang went to college in Bristol, where he took classes in classic English literature and world history, as well as art history.

He also took photography, as he’s always wanted to do something along the lines of Tintin’s work.

During his first semester, he befriended Hanna(my Tintin OC), who was in his art history class.

The two hit it off pretty well as friends, since Hanna thought Chang was very sweet. She was also the first person whom he opened up to about surviving alone in the Himalayas.

When Hanna told Chang about her desire to go into acting and singing, Chang thought she had a very solid goal in mind.

Chang learned much of his photography from Hanna's sister Maxine, who showed him how to operate a camera. She even showed him how to take action shots.

After some time, Hanna and Chang's friendship bloomed into a romance. They dated for about a year or so, with Chang keeping a few photo records of their time together.

Chang would frequently visit Tintin and Haddock in Brussels for about or week or two as part of a cultural exchange.

During the weeks in which he visited, Tintin began to develop a crush on Chang. Any time he visited, his feelings toward him became more obvious.

At some point, Hanna had caught on when she and Maxine were invited to Brussels, as well as Chang.

She knew Tintin often got flustered whenever Chang visited him, so she pulled him aside and told him about it. She wanted him to feel comfier with someone he truly felt happy with.

So Hanna and Chang made the decision to silently break up. Chang was worried Hanna wouldn't be able to move on, but she assured him everything would be okay.

So these are just my headcanons for Chang within my Tintin story interpretation. I might also do a fanstory about Chang visiting Tintin. Because I plan to include him in some of my future stories 😁

But this will be written, as my best strength is writing fanfics, lol...

Stay tuned for more characters and OCs to come!

[beddybites]

Chop chop Hashira girl, i want the backstories of the 3, 30 episodes and 15 seasons for tomorrow (i love them so much sobs)

first of all , honored u see me as the hashira girl

the story is still very much in development but since ur interested ill at least tell u a bit about them!

im so sorry this took so long :,D none of my drafts about this post ever saved so i lost the strength

Huntwoe Hill is a dark fantasy story with central themes on family and relationships and the dark forces that can harm them— whether it be from outside the family, or inside

i recently had to make a comic page about them, so i’ll share that here!

the first novel focuses on Wren Bishop, a sensitive and witty 18 year old girl who struggles with depression and left home as a result of her family’s treatment of her. as the “black sheep” of the Belladonna family, she has a habit of being really hard on herself. she specializes in photography and poetry, and loves birds

her closest friend is her older cousin Russel Rook (23), an elementary school music teacher and the golden boy of the Belladonna family. he’s a very kind hearted man who has been by Wren’s side since she was born. he’s dating a woman named Daisy, and volunteered to help chaperone her students on a field trip

Russel, Daisy, and 28 children go missing during their stay on Huntwoe Hill, a giant mountain that hundreds and thousands of people have died or gone missing in. because of this, the teachers and their students are almost immediately deemed to have not survived the harsh conditions of the mountain. Wren senses something is wrong, and goes on a one-man search for them

along the way she encounters their Uncle Foggy, who she had not seen in over eight years, as he was kicked out of the Belladonna family for reasons she was never told about. he’s a jaded and silly thirty year old man who used to tell his nieces and nephews all sorts of stories about the mountain. estranged and distancing himself, he sought to protect his family and uncover a curse inflicted upon them

Uncle Foggy reveals to Wren that the mountain serves as a doorway for all kinds of creatures and ghouls, and he works for an organization that hunts them

Wren, of course, doesn’t believe him until she encounters these creatures first hand

i can go into more depth about them in the future! this story has been years in the making and it’s still heavy in development, and i dont typically talk about my own oc’s, so we’ll see …

there is a much much larger cast, i’ve only designed three of them though haha

main sources of inspiration for this story stem from Demon Slayer, Haunting of Hill House, Midnight Mass, Soul Eater and the Doctor Strange comics/movies from MARVEL

thank you for being interested in them ahhhh! apologies again for how long this took :,0

[thinkingboute]

masks pt. 2 | harry styles x model!oc

summary: Lina has spent time away from the hell of the modeling world---recouping in Brazil with her new puppy and meditating on what life she really wants for herself. She makes her modeling return, a few months after her run in with Harry Styles, at the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. Eager to let the past be the past, she embraces a new start. Until, that is, One Direction is set to perform on the runway.

part 1 here!

warnings: mentions of drugs, disordered eating, vomit, anxiety, (eventually sexual content but be patient friends)

a/n: A quick part 2 before I can really dive into the story I have planned for these two. I'm having a lot of fun developing Lina as a person and her independent voice. I know people prefer x reader fics so I appreciate those of you who have shown love to the first part! I hope you enjoy this one!!

word count: about 1.1k

The Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show.

The best and worse time of a model’s year. 

Lina had been in the gym for at least three hours each day for the last two weeks. Each meal she had was carefully crafted to cause the least bloating, give her the most protein, and not add one pound to the scale. The danger of this was not lost on her, but what choice did she have? She was glad to have escaped this almost alternate universe models lived in for a few weeks before the prep for the show began. 

After the disastrous Vanity Fair ball in October, Lina woke up in her hotel room, unsure of how she got there, with no phone or dignity. She had been drowning in shoots and shows and YouTube interviews and more shoots and another shoot and another show and another and another and another for so long. She could hardly recognize her life, now grey and dull. 

Rolling over in the plush bed, she recalled bits and pieces of her humiliating meeting with Harry Styles. She groaned, shifting back onto her back and smothering herself with a pillow. A knock at the door alerted her of Darren’s entry into her suite, followed by 30 minutes of scolding, as though she were a child. She endured it, mostly because she deserved it, and apologized profusely, offering to grab him a scone from the upscale bakery down the block as a truce. He agreed, of course, as Darren was not one to turn down baked goods.

As they walked the busy streets of Manhattan, Lina snuggled into a large fur lined coat, bloodshot eyes obscured by massive sunglasses (Which blocked no sun. It was October in New York), and Darren, dressed in all black as per usual, Lina caught glimpses of Darren’s concerned eyes flitting back and forth between her face and the street in front of him. It felt good to know someone cared about her. As much as she tried to hide it for many long months before, she could not ignore it now: she was spiraling.

“I know I look fantastic, Darren,” Lina drawled, sarcasm dripping from her voice, “but, it would be nice if you stopped just looking at me and said what you want to say.”

Darren shot her a look that had less concern and more disdain. “You know I have children, right Lina?”

She snorted. “I’d be a little concerned if I didn’t, mister. I’ve only met them, what, is it six times now?”

Darren didn’t bother addressing her chide. “When they first went off to college, I called them every day. They were 15 minutes away,” he laughed, and Lina did, too. “I was so worried about them getting hurt, or making terrible decision, and they were only a car ride away.”

“You’re a good father, Darren.”

“Nobody calls you, Lina. If they did, they would see what I’ve seen for too long now.”

“And what’s that?”

“You’re falling apart.”

They walked in silence the rest of the way to and from the bakery. The next day, Lina called her management, canceled her upcoming shoots, and flew to Brazil.

Now, as December crept into the dark streets of London, Lina longed for the warmth of the sun and sand again. Professional opinion of her had dropped after cancelling her shoots on such short notice a few months ago, but how her opinion of herself had soared. She was by no means Zen, as Darren liked to call her, but warmth returned to her cheeks, smiles came more easily to her lips, and, most importantly, she got a dog.  She was ready to return to the industry and, hopefully, be able to focus on what actually mattered to her so long ago: fashion.

And, what a way to start up again: The Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show. She was excited to see Gigi again after so long, and to finally have fun on the runway again. There was just one problem, though.

One Direction was performing. 

How could she escape that dark part of herself when she had to strut the person who saw her at her very lowest? Had he told any of his bandmates about that night? Would he say anything about it in front of anyone? He seemed a bit cocky that night, albeit concerned about her well-being. Maybe he would use the bit of dirt he had on her to embarrass her tonight because she’d run out on him.

Lina shook her head, causing the makeup artist working on her eyeshadow to tut at her. The silk of her robe was cool against her skin as she took a deep breath, shoulders rising up to her ears before slowly lowering back down, and apologized to the woman behind her closed lids. 

“Fancy seeing you here,” a low voice drawled. The English accent added a certain musicality to the simple sentence.

Lina winced, earning a light slap to the should from the woman. “I told you before. I’m not typically puking in men’s bathrooms.”

He huffed a laugh. “You look good.”

Lina’s eyes rolled behind her eyelids. “That’s my job,” she said.

Another laugh. “No, I meant, like, good. A bit less like a corpse.”

She clutched at her chest dramatically. “How rude.” It seemed that all Harry Styles did was laugh. “How’d you get back here, anyway?”

“Funnily enough, I was looking for the bathroom.”

“I’m not even sure there is a men’s bathroom here.”

It sounded like he took a sip from a water bottle. “If there was, I’m sure you’d’ve found it.”

Lina snorted. “Maybe you should go look for it. I’m a bit busy at the moment.”

A few light taps to her should signaled for her to open her eyes. Harry leaned against the table in front of her, plastic water bottle in hand, hair mussed as though he’d run his hand through it a few too many times. “Meet me there, yeah?” he joked, pressing himself away from the table. Lina went to respond, but he turned to walk away before she could open her mouth. She supposed that was karma for how she’d left their last conversation. 

She didn’t have much time to think about it, though. Three new women crowded her chair, hands like a whirlwind around her, taking out rollers, dusting some shimmery powder along her collar bones, taking candids for Instagram. 

Lina closed her lips around the straw of her Diet Coke (the only Coke she partook in, thank you very much) and closed her eyes, a low laugh and soft green eyes bouncing around her head.

a/n: I swear things will pick up soon!!!

[zepskies]

And So It Goes - Part 15

Pairing: Billy Butcher x OFC (Latina!OC)

Summary: As Madelyn Stillwell’s personal assistant, Helena Flores finds herself caught between protecting her job — and more importantly her life — or helping Billy Butcher bring down the supe who killed her best friend, Becca. 

AN: This story lives!!! Lol I'll try to be more consistent about finishing the last few chapters on this story for those who are still following it.

ASIG Series Masterlist

Word Count: 5,000 Warnings: 18+ for some spiciness, angst.

15: Schemes & Lies

Three months after Butcher and Helena each accepted job offers, they had developed a kind of rhythm. On days like today, when he was home and actually woke beside her in bed, their mornings could afford to be lazy.

She woke to his hand slipping under her shirt as he moved in closer behind her. His bare chest met her back, and she felt his warmth. She had to stifle a smile, though her eyes remained closed while another hand brushed her dark hair away from her neck and pressed a nipping kiss just under her ear. His beard prickled along her skin.

“You can stop pretending you’re asleep,” he rumbled.

A real smile crept across her face as his fingers danced tantalizingly between her breasts. She breathed in deep and hummed with a little stretch, as if she were just waking up.

She gave herself away by purposefully rubbing her ass against his growing length. It earned a grunt from him, followed by a chuckle.

“All right, you fucking asked for it,” said Butcher.

Helena giggled and turned her head to accept a kiss. But before the morning could well and truly kick off, his phone buzzed on the nightstand.

They paused. She was the first to sigh and let her hand fall away from where it had begun to sift through his short hair.

“That’s you, babe,” she said.

“I know,” came his surly reply. Her amused smile returned while she watched him twist away to reach for the phone. He answered it without getting out of bed.

Predictably, it was Hughie. Supe Affairs had another case for him, Kimiko, and Frenchie. Some telekinetic supe was robbing stores without even entering the building.

By the time he hung up, Helena was ready for what her boyfriend was about to say when he sat up in bed and turned to her.

“I’ve gotta go,” he said.

She nodded and laid a hand on his chest. “Be safe.”

He briefly covered her hand and nodded. He hesitated for a moment, but he leaned over and pressed a parting kiss to her hairline.

Then, they each got out of bed to start the day. Butcher eventually left after freshening up and getting dressed, with a to-go mug filled with a fresh batch of Cuban coffee. When his car peeled out of the driveway, heading for the city, Helena saw that the coast was clear.

She got dressed for “work,” and she drove in the opposite direction—a couple of hours upstate. She sent a text each to both Grace and Ryan. By the time Helena got to the safe house, Ryan was already hanging out in the front yard waiting for her.

He ran up to her with a solid hug that almost bowled her over, but she accepted it with a laugh.

“Hey, buddy,” she greeted, carding her fingers warmly through his hair. “What’s up?”

“Nothin’ but the rent,” Ryan joked. She’d taught him that one when they were jamming out to ‘90s music while cooking dinner together last week.

“Damn right,” Helena grinned. She walked him inside, where Grace had been watching her charge from the front windows.  

“I need to run some errands. Are you all right here with him?” Grace asked. Helena nodded.

“Yeah, for sure,” she replied, before looking over at Ryan. “What’re we doing today? Trivial Pursuit, Sudoku, a movie?”

Ryan thought about it. Then he gave a smile that was all Becca.

“All three?” he suggested, and also implored with those big blue eyes.

Helena chuckled. This time, she ruffled his hair. “Okay, Sudoku and a movie first. Let’s pick one out.”

An hour later, they were nearly done with Jurassic Park: The Lost World when Ryan turned to Helena on the couch. A big bowl of popcorn was nestled between them, and their Sudoku booklets were long ago filled out. She’d have to bring more challenging ones next time.

“Can I ask you something?” said Ryan.

Helena nodded and paused the movie. “Shoot.”

“If you’re…together, why don’t you just come with Billy when he visits?” he asked.

She sighed; she’d thought she went over this already. “It’s not because I don’t want him to know I’m hanging out with you. It’s because this is important to me. The work I do with Grace is also important to me, but he’d rather I do something else… Billy wants me to be safe, but sometimes, I have to take risks in order to make a difference. Just like he’s doing with Supe Affairs.”

This was her conviction, and she couldn’t feel guilty about what she was doing, only that she was lying to him.

“I don’t get it,” Ryan said, his brows furrowing. “Are you doing something wrong?”

“What’s wrong is that I’m keeping it from him. But I don’t regret spending time with you, or working with Grace,” Helena replied. “Ryan, it’s natural to want to protect the people you care about. Like your mom. She made a lot of sacrifices to protect you, and that wasn’t wrong either.”

Ryan seemed to digest that, while Helena’s mind continued to churn. It had taken her a while to understand Becca’s choices, but if Helena could already feel this much of a desire to watch over Ryan and protect him, then she could only imagine what Becca had felt. Every day Helena spent with her best friend’s son was both a blessing and a curse: it reminded her of Becca, in the best and worst of ways.

She could also see him thinking, with that sad frown of his. It broke Helena’s heart, if she was honest. So she scooted over on the couch and tugged him into her side. He went willingly, resting against her when she wrapped an arm around his shoulders and rubbed his back.

“But just so you know, I don’t come to see you because I have to,” she said. “I think we’ve got a good thing going here, don’t you?”

Ryan smiled, and he nodded before glancing up at her. “Can you tell me another story about her?”

“Hmm.” Helena searched through the archives of her brain. “Okay, we were in high school—”

A knock at the door interrupted her. Her entire body tensed.

“Ryan, go to your room. Don’t come out unless I tell you to, okay?” she said.

He opened his mouth to protest, but seeing her serious gaze, he nodded and got up to heed her instruction. Helena grabbed the gun Grace had told her was hidden under the coffee table, and cautiously she went to the front door and looked through the peephole.

She relaxed, expelling a breath. Fuck.

“It’s okay, Ryan!” she called back, and she opened the door to one Billy Butcher.

His dark brows rose a fraction, the surprise evident in his eyes. He nearly dropped the new Connect 4 game he held.

“What the bloody hell are you doing here?” he asked.

Helena sighed and pushed the door open. “Nice greeting. Come in.”

Butcher grasped her arm and leaned in. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Ryan coming, but he still made a point to say lowly in her ear.

“You’ve got some ‘splainin’ to do, Hel.” His tone was cheeky, but it held an undercurrent of serious that she recognized well.

“We’ll hash it out at home. Don’t make a scene in front of Ryan,” she replied. She caught sight of Grace’s car pulling back into the driveway. “I’ll head out first.”

After saying a quick goodbye to Ryan with a hug (all the while ignoring Butcher’s eyes on her), Helena took her leave and started the long drive back home.

Butcher watched her go through the window. And when Grace entered the house, his grouch look let her know that they’d be having words.

He spent the better part of the afternoon catching up with Ryan and playing their new game. But when the kid finally went upstairs for a shower before the dinner Grace was cooking, Butcher cornered her in the kitchen.

“You’ve got some mighty fucking nerve, don’tcha?” he said.

Grace shot him a roll of her eyes. “Come off it, Butcher.”

“You should’ve fucking told me,” he said hotly. “You didn’t just let her back into the game. You pushed her right into the bloody center.”

Grace stopped stirring the spaghetti sauce to level him with a glare.

“Your actions have consequences,” she said coolly. “You could’ve left Helena well enough alone, and let her put Homelander, and all of Vought out of her mind. You are the one who can’t let go.” 

Butcher later found Helena back at her house. She had showered and dressed into one of her old college shirts, faded and rung smaller in the wash, and some skimpy shorts. If she was trying to distract him, she’d have to work a bit harder than that. (Though the sight of her, bare legs and braless, did catch his eye.)  

He turned off the TV while she was watching the latest episode of The Great British Bake Off and looked down on her with a face of stone. She curbed her inclination to spark off first.

“Look, I’m sorry I lied to you—”

“That’s the least of it,” Butcher snapped. “I don’t need you stepping into my business—”

“Excuse me,” she said tersely, and she pushed off the couch to meet his tense stance. “Ryan isn’t just your business. Becca was like a sister to me. You and I both know that she wanted her son taken care of.”

“Grace and I have it covered,” Butcher argued.

“Ryan would be lucky to see you once a month,” she countered. “And Grace can’t watch him every second of the day. Besides, he needs more than that. He needs as many friends and socialization as we can give him—”

“And what happens if Homelander finds him someday,” he reminded. “What the fuck happened to laying low?”

Helena made a sound of frustration and threw up her hands.

“Well, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I just can’t do some stupid fucking data entry job,” she said. “I’ve been in this too long. And apparently, so have you.”  

Butcher didn’t have an answer for her.

So he left, and slammed the door behind him.

Helena didn’t know this, because Butcher screened his calls for the next two days. But he drove back into the city after seeing a text from Queen Maeve, of all people, on his latest burner phone.

He rented a by-the-hour motel for the express purpose of doing business. She had been giving him intel on rogue supes for months, acting as his undisclosed informant.

Tonight, she met him there with a few samples of Vought’s latest R&D project: V24. Supposedly, it gave someone superpowers for just 24 hours.

Why? Well, maybe it would give Butcher the edge he needed to end Homelander, once and for all.

But the pièce de resistance of that conversation was her latest tip: a weapon that could possibly kill Homelander, like it killed America’s first superhero.

Soldier Boy.

Helena was in a silently simmering rage when she got ahold of Frenchie over the phone. She paced the length of her living room. 

“I’m only going to ask this once, and I don’t want any bullshit, Frenchie,” she said. “Where is he?”

The other man gave a nervous chuckle. “Why’re you trying so hard to find Monsieur Charcutier?”

She paused; no one on the team, not even M.M. knew that she and Butcher were together. She made up an excuse on the fly.

“It’s about Ryan,” she said. “I’ve been helping Grace with a few projects, including his safety detail.”

“Truth be told, I haven’t seen him in a few days,” Frenchie admitted. “But, the last time he was here, he mentioned something about finding a supe named Gunpowder.”

Gunpowder? The name rung a bell, but not much of one.

“Why?” she asked. Frenchie heaved a sigh, but he eventually told her about Butcher’s latest plan (obsession)—finding the weapon that might’ve killed Soldier Boy forty years ago.

Helena hung up with Frenchie and made yet another call.

“Yes?” Grace answered.

“What do you know about Soldier Boy’s death?” Helena asked, in a tone that said she had no time and patience for any runaround.

There was a pause on the line.

Soon enough, however, Grace’s shrewd voice returned.

“I know he’s dead,” she said. “Whatever Butcher’s after this time, he’s chasing a ghost story.”

Helena wanted to believe that was true, but she had spent her entire career reading people. Reading a room, hearing the unspoken in what they said. And she had an inkling that her new boss was lying her ass off. 

Not even 24 hours after that conversation, Grace called Helena to ask for her help…and to drop a bomb.

“What the fuck? Victoria Neuman’s a supe?” she exclaimed, but soon covered her mouth, as if anyone could hear her in the privacy of her big empty house.

“It’s worse than that,” Grace sighed. She then explained that Hughie had seen her explode a man who knew her before she became Victoria Neuman. She’d been adopted from an orphanage as a child…by Stan Edgar, of all people.

Helena sat down hard on the living room couch and rubbed at her already aching head.

“And I fucking made her head of Supe Affairs,” Grace said. In her tone, Helena knew the woman was kicking herself.

“She knows where Ryan is?” Helena asked.

“Yes. I’ve already organized his relocation. Meet me at the following address, but don’t write it down.” 

Helena had a better photographic memory than she did an audible one, but she still remembered the numbers and street to the letter.

As always, Ryan was happy to see her. He came bounding to her when she got out of her car. Grace came out as well.

This house was old and situated on the verge of forest, virtually in the middle of nowhere, and cold and dreary with large gray clouds looming above.

“What’s the plan?” Helena asked Grace, after the three of them headed inside. Ryan showed Helena where the kitchen was so she could start making some tea; she needed something to calm her nerves.

“This is safe, for now, but we’ll need to keep moving,” said Grace. “It’s up to you whether you want to come with us.”

The unspoken second choice was staying at home, where Helena was most likely safer. At this point, if she were to keep visiting Grace and Ryan, she could potentially put his safety in jeopardy.

They had to assume Victoria had told Stan Edgar what she knew about Ryan’s first safe house. The fact that Homelander hadn’t come barging in for a year told them that either Victoria or Stan had kept the information to themselves (a small blessing). But Ryan had been even more exposed than they thought.

Helena watched Ryan carefully pour the hot water from the kettle into each of the mugs. She spoke lowly with Grace, even though they both knew that the child’s superior hearing would likely pick up on whatever they said.

“I don’t want to leave him,” Helena whispered.

“You have to think of what’s best for him,” Grace replied.

“I am,” Helena returned. “He needs us. All of us. Even Billy.”

Especially Billy, she thought.

Helena and Grace continued to go over the pros and cons of her continuing to make her visits to Ryan, but Helena was surprised when Grace answered a text with a frustrated sigh.

“Butcher’s coming,” she said.

“What? Now?” Helena said. Both hope and anger trilled through her. She hadn’t heard from him in a week, and now he was swooping in?

Well, she doubted he knew she would be here, to be fair.

An hour or so later, she was proven right. Butcher drove up with Kimiko, Hughie (who strangely had his right arm in a cast), and even M.M. They were just as surprised to see Helena, though they watched the scene unfolding between her and Butcher as they stared at one another with tension.

It didn’t break, even when Ryan came to all but tackle Butcher with a hug.

“Ooh,” Butcher grunted, hiding a frisson of pain as he hugged the kid back. “Easy does it, lad. Bloody death grip you got there.”

Ryan backed off slightly with concern. He’d noticed the same thing Helena did, apparently.

“Are you okay?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Butcher said with an easy smile. He patted the kid’s shoulder and began to lead him inside. Though his eyes met Helena’s as he passed her. They both knew they didn’t want to make a scene in front of Ryan.

But pulled him aside into the hall before he could have whatever tete-a-tete he wanted to have with Grace. Helena smacked him on the chest, making him flinch.

“Ey!” he protested, but she leveled a finger at him.

“You’ve got some fucking nerve,” Helena hissed. “You go radio silence on me for a week. I have to find out from Frenchie about your latest batshit crazy fucking scheme to end Homelander.”

Butcher’s teeth clenched in frustration, but he grasped her arm gently.

“Look, we can hash this out all you want later. But we’ve both got some fucking work to do here,” he said.

Helena shrugged his hand off her arm. “That’s no apology. Until you’re ready for that, I guess we have nothing to discuss.”

She turned on her heel and went into the room where Grace and the others were waiting, save for Kimiko, who was keeping an eye on Ryan in the backyard.

Butcher sighed and followed Helena into the large study. Helena stood by Grace with her arms crossed. Hughie stood opposite with M.M., who looked between Butcher and Helena shrewdly.

“Aw, hell nah,” he said.

Hughie’s brows drew together in confusion. “What?”

M.M. sighed and cast a finger between the simmering Helena and the tense shoulders of Butcher.

“I can’t believe it,” he said. “How long’ve you two been fucking?”

Helena’s eyes widened, while Butcher’s went heavenward.

“Here we fuckin’ go,” he muttered.

“It’s not,” Helena tried to speak, with stops and false starts that had her blushing. “It’s not exactly like that.”

M.M. tilted his head and crossed his arms. “Yeah? What’s it like?”

“For Christ’s sake,” Butcher said.

“Whoa, what?” Hughie interjected.

“Can we please just,” Grace tried, but Helena finally raised her voice to cut over everyone.

“It’s a thing, okay! We’re together,” she said, though she sent Butcher a glare. “Though at the moment, that remains to be seen.”

A pregnant pause filled the room.

Hughie managed to utter, “Uh...how long’s this been going on?”

Helena sighed. “About a year.”

M.M. blinked in surprise, though it didn’t shock him to see that Grace clearly knew. He shook his head.

“Interesting.”

“Right, can we get back to the matter at hand?” Grace said. “Victoria Neuman. I’d very much like to hear the plan to eliminate her.”

“Well, that depends,” Butcher said. His hands slid into his pockets as he turned to her. “On what you can tell us about your holiday, down in Nicaragua.”

What? Helena thought. She turned to Grace with a frown.

“I’ve never been to Nicaragua,” said the agent.

“Oh really? ‘Cause a little birdy told me you were Payback’s case officer down there, on a classified job that Soldier Boy never came back from.”

The other woman tried to deny she knew anything about what Butcher was talking about…but after he threatened to expose all of her contacts and agents in the CIA, both active and inactive. Helena looked at Butcher incredulously, wondering where his soul had gone to.

He avoided her gaze and remained steady on Grace. This was how he got results.

“It was part of Operation Charly,” Grace eventually admitted, though through her disgust at Butcher.

To Helena’s further surprise, Grace admitted to participating in a secret CIA operation in 1984 for the Cold War efforts against the Russians. In which the CIA trafficked cocaine into the U.S. to fund the government’s efforts.

And Vought American, led by a young Stan Edgar, leveraged enough political power to try partnering their team of supes with American soldiers. Their team was Payback, led by Soldier Boy, Vought’s first superhero.

Helena had been a records keeper, among other things. She knew Soldier Boy’s story all too well. His backstory had been carefully crafted: a “rags to riches” story that framed a poor young kid from hard knocks into taking the world’s first super serum in 1944. He’d led his own unit in World War II, fighting against the Nazis and for the American dream.

His entire career had been tickertape parades, shitty movies, and even a few cheesy music videos that had been chart toppers in the ‘70s and ‘80s. Helena had seen them all. And she’d come to learn, just as well, that they’d been completely fabricated.

Now, she had to listen to Grace tell her story. About how the cast of Payback had fucked up the entire mission.

But Butcher paused her story halfway through, looking pale and almost green as he made his way down the hall to the bathroom. Helena frowned. She held a waiting hand up at Grace and went to follow him.

She heard the flush of a toilet, more than once, after the sounds of his upheaval. She was leaning against the wall, arms crossed when Butcher finally emerged. He stopped short, meeting her gaze. In his, she saw that his eyes were red and glossy. His skin was ashen and dewy with sweat. She could faintly smell chemicals on him. Her head tilted.

“Are you okay?” she asked.

“‘M fine, Hel.”

“Nope. Try again.” She stepped into his orbit and looked up at his face. This didn’t look like a bad burrito or a stomach bug. This looked worse. Like withdrawal. “Oh my God. Are you on something?”

Butcher looked away from her. She grasped his trench coat and made him look at her.

“What the hell is going on with you? Jesus, Billy. Talk to me,” she pleaded. “When were you going to tell me about this Soldier Boy thing?”

Again, he didn’t want to seem to answer her. Her lips pursed.

“Look, I know you’ve got M.M. and the rest of the guys. But weren’t you and I in this together?” she asked.

Butcher made the mistake of looking into her eyes. There, he couldn’t lie.

“It’s temp. V. Or uh…V24,” he said.

Helena’s eyes went wide as her mouth fell open. “Oh my fucking…Billy.”

V24 was the last R&D project she heard about before she quit her job at Vought. She knew all too well what it was.

“Finally gives me the chance to level the fucking playing field,” he said. She grasped at his shirt.

“How the fuck did you get that? When I left, it was still in preliminary testing,” she said.

“Well, the mockups are a bit hairy, but it gets the fucking job done,” he said.

She let out an incredulous scoff, resting a hand on his pale cheek. “Clearly it isn’t without side effects.”

Butcher’s face was grim. “Small price to pay.”

Helena paused. Her expression dimmed from concern to shock, and then sadness. Her hand slowly fell from his cheek.

“You’re not going to stop,” she said shakily. “This vendetta you have against Homelander. You’re not gonna stop until you’re dead. Which means you’re giving up on us. On everything we have…or would’ve had.”

“Hel,” Butcher sighed. He tried to hold her, but she slipped away from his would-be embrace.

She shook her head, and tears welled up in her eyes. 

“You don’t really love me,” Helena realized, her lower lip trembling. “Either that, or you hate Homelander more.”

She didn’t give him a chance to touch her again. She walked away from him, down the hall and back into the room where Grace and the others were waiting. She scrubbed at her tears along the way.

Grace’s story culminated in Swatto giving away the CIA’s position. The cartel they were trying to avoid brought Russian special forces in as their allies.

A mass shootout ensued, in which all of Grace’s unit were massacred, and Soldier Boy had somehow been killed, his body taken far beyond the Iron Wall, along with whatever mystery weapon that could possibly kill an invulnerable supe.

Helena couldn’t help but see Grace in a new, more sour light. Yes, she’d been the sole survivor of a mass grave. But she had led an operation that had ruined the lives of thousands.

When Grace asked to speak to Butcher alone for a moment, Helena easily agreed. She needed a break from both of them. She left the room in disgust and joined M.M. on the porch outside. They watched Hughie join Kimiko in playing Connect 4 with Ryan.

“I’m sorry,” M.M. said. It earned her curious gaze. “I can’t even judge you for hooking up with Butcher, because I’m here now too.” 

She smiled faintly. Though a few minutes later, she frowned with a jolt as the front door slammed open. Out came Butcher, roiling mad. Grace was on his heels.

“What happened?” Hughie asked. He and Kimiko walked over with Ryan.

“We’re off,” Butcher snapped. He headed for his car without even looking their way. Ryan ran over to meet him.

“Butcher, wait up! Where-where’re you going?” he asked.

“The city,” Butcher spoke shortly. Helena got up to follow them. Worry churned in her gut, for both of them.

“When will I see you again?” asked Ryan.

“You won’t. Ain’t safe for you.” Butcher’s words were clipped, and none too gentle.

“Billy,” Helena tried to stop him. It took Ryan pushing at the man, showing a fraction of his super strength. It was clearly instinctual, born of desperation. But Helena saw the hint of wariness behind Butcher’s eyes.

“What are you talking about?” Ryan asked. Pleaded really, for an explanation, for some compassion. Butcher had seemed to be rung dry.

“I got to go,” he said.

That was when Ryan grabbed the man’s arm, with intentional strength. He huffed and puffed like he was on the verge of losing control.

“Ryan,” Helena warned, with worry in her eyes. She stepped up behind Butcher, who held out a protective hand against her coming closer.

“Ryan, let go,” Butcher said, with authority.

“No! You said you’d always watch out for me,” Ryan cried. “You promised!”

Butcher repeated himself, more firm, but still, the kid didn’t relent.

“I won’t let you!”

“Well, maybe I don’t want to look at ya, after what you done to my Becca. Did you ever think of that?” Butcher snapped.

Helena gaped. Her shock was almost as visceral as Ryan’s dismay. He let go of Butcher with tears already welling up in his eyes.

His eyes that flashed red.

Helena gasped this time. It led Butcher to subtly shift his stance, so he was standing directly in front of her. He already regretted his words, but his anger and his pride wouldn’t allow him to do anything more than watch for what Ryan would do.

With a blink, the red haze was gone, but he reached for the chain of the Christopher’s medal around his neck and yanked it off. He threw it at Butcher’s feet.

“I hate you,” he said, in a trembling voice. He ran back into the house.

 Butcher turned around to find that Helena also had tears unshed in her eyes. She trembled with both shock and a thread of wary fear. Before he could ask if she was all right, she looked up at him like she didn’t know him.

“How could you do that?” she asked. “He’s just a kid, Billy!”

He glanced down at the ground. His face told her that he knew she was right, but out of his mouth came more resigned assholery.

“Yeah, well, what else is fucking new,” he said. Helena scoffed angrily.  

“You’re more than this,” she said. “I don’t care what the hell Grace told you. You don’t have to be this man.”

He tilted his head at her.

“And what would you have me be? Prince bloody fucking Charming?” Butcher shot back. “You can babysit that kid all you want, but you ain’t his fuckin’ mum! You ain’t Becca.”

A shaking breath fell from Helena’s lips. She flinched as if he’d slapped her.

Butcher saw it all play out across her face: shock, dismay, and deep hurt. Her tears welled up once more and slid down her cheeks. Behind her, he saw M.M., Grace, Hughie, and Kimiko. All of them saw a monster in human clothing.

Rather than torture himself further by staring at her face, he looked away. And like a coward, he began to turn from her to head for his car.

“If you walk away from me, I’m done,” Helena said. She watched him halt in his steps. “I’ll be fucking done with you for real.”

His steps halted for a moment.

She saw that it wasn’t enough to hold him, however. Her tears continued to fall as she watched him walk away from her, and she glared at his back all the while.

She accepted murmured apologies from M.M. and Hughie, and a sad look from Kimiko as they left to continue their mission: their hunt for Soldier Boy.

Helena felt rooted to where she stood, until Grace laid a hand on her shoulder.

Both women eventually turned back to the house. Helena wiped at her tears and went upstairs to find Ryan’s door. She leaned against it and let out a breath.

“You want to talk?” she offered.

“Leave me alone!” came the angry reply. But she knew he was crying, that his heart was shattered.  

She knew the feeling.

AN: 😬 Sorry for ending on angst, but we're headed into the meat of S3 now...

Next Time:

Butcher makes a deal, and Helena finally meets Soldier Boy! 😜

Soldier Boy distracted Helena from her thoughts, however, when he reached out to thumb at her chin, raising her face up to his. 

“What’s your name, by the way?” he asked. His head quirked slightly. 

“Helena.” She guided his hand away with her own, but in one smooth motion, he’d taken her hand and pressed a kiss to the back of it. 

“The face that launched a thousand ships,” he teased. “I like it.”

“That was Helen,” she replied, subtly tugging her hand out of his. “You know, of Troy.”

But the bitch of the bunch was, she was actually blushing.

Keep Reading: PART 16

The Boys Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Tag List:

@lauraaan182 @homielander @calizmor @haibara-ai-tsii @brujaporfavor @sleepyqueerenergy @adoringanakin @skyesthebomb @lunaticgurly @deans-spinster-witch @kazsrm67 @letheatheodore @agothwithheavysetmakeup @jacklesbrainworms @foxyjwls007

@wincastifer @ades106 @iamsapphine @simpforbuckyb @vanillawhiskeyflavoredkisses @roseblue373 @brianochka @branj19 @hazel-eye-coffee-shop-girl-blog @globetrotter28 @charmed-asylum @waywardxwords @deanwinchestersgirl87 @this-is-me19 @rachiem4-blog @sweettimelady @leigh70 @clinicallydepresso

@xiphoidbones @skoveu @nyotamalfoy @kmc1989 @emily-winchester @emily-winchester @xxlaynaxx

[yoshipupz]

FERNGULLY SELF INSERT OC ALERT ALERT 🤖🤖🔊🔊🔊‼️‼️🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️‼️‼️‼️

I love making self inserts 😛😛 like, yea guys.. I’m a bat. Heh. ladies ladies, I’ll be here all night.. tips fedora

Anyways yeah I’ve been working on her for a few days now and I actually came up with an entire story for her

She was found injured by humans and taken into a rescue home where they temporarily cared for her until her injuries had gotten better. They released her into the Australian Rainforest, and she had happened to find her way to Ferngully, where she first ran into Crysta. She and Crysta became best friends, but along with her she also met Pips, the Beatle Boys, Goanna, and most importantly; Batty Koda. She and Batty were very friendly with each other at first, But she wondered - what was that thing on his head? Batty explained his distaste for humans, and she felt bad for him. Despite that, she didn’t exactly agree with him. See, Batty doesn’t like humans, PERIOD. But Yoshi was taken in and cared by them, so she’s okay with most of them. That caused Batty to get a little agitated, and from then on they would argue a lot. Crysta had to break them up multiple times. Though, with the arguing came a tolerance with each other. Other than learning more about their differentiating taste in humans, they learned about each other’s interests and general personalities along the way. It got them to accidentally get comfortable with one another, they started arguing less, beginning to hang out with each other voluntarily. From then, it just kept building until she eventually started to develop feelings for him. 🥰

Or whatever. Yadayada I wish I was a bat and all that nonsense 🤖 Aallsooo I have the story planned out for how she accidentally confessed! I’ll probably make a different post for that though. Anyways, enjoooooy!

(also yes this is copy and pasted from instagram bro I ain’t rewriting allat)

[raven-at-the-writing-desk]

I love your OC “Raven”, she’s so cute and adorable. I just saw your post about what she would dream of during Malleus’ overblot and thought that it would be difficult for the guys to try to wake her up as Malleus tells her sweet dreams and seems genuinely happy that she can become the main character in this dream reality. So when the guys try to tell her that it’s all fake and she is still a storyteller, Malleus would get really angry (probably more angry about that then, when the rest of them are getting out of the dream) as in the post about the masquerade event, it was like Malleus and Raven were siblings, so Malleus would most likely put some barrier to keep them out of her dream or something.

[Referencing this post and this story!]

Wah, thank you 😭 I'm glad you like her and find her little stories and interactions with the other characters interesting~

It’s been quite interesting to hear about how others perceive certain relationships and dynamics that Miss Raven has with her peers. I think this is actually the first time someone else has told me there’s a sibling-like bond between her and Malleus 😂 (I would like to mention that I had a running joke that Sebek mistook them as distant relatives, but didn’t think that I’ve ever written Malleus and Raven with the intention of being sibling-like.)

(I’m going to talk about this for a while, so see the rest below the cut ^^)

They mainly see each other sporadically and in a “professional” capacity because Raven serves as the middle man between the other dorm leaders + the headmaster and Malleus (since they often miss each other). Again, she’s the Diablo to Malleus’s Maleficent— With the events of Glorious Masquerade, it feels like they’ve come to understand one another a little more. They’ve both people who want to fiercely defend their own ideals, even if it comes at the cost of putting themselves on the front lines. Malleus leaves the masquerade with newfound respect for the audacity (or is it stupidity?) of Raven to stand against him, which I guess is where a vague sense of “fondness” comes from in spite of how cordial their interactions usually are.

When you say they feel like siblings, I’m assuming it’s Malleus = big brother and Raven = little sister? 🤔 I wonder if he’s ever canonically wanted to be a big brother… That would, uh… require his parents to still be alive and present. I’d imagine it’s lonely in his castle whenever Lilia’s busy, so maybe Malleus has thought about having a sibling that looks up to him and is by his side. In Raven’s case, she has wished for siblings to keep her company before—whether older or younger, she’s not picky. Some days she wants to be the one taking care of others, and other days she wants to be the one being taken care of. I think both Malleus and Raven could be either; they both have their moments of maturity and immaturity that the other bounces off of like they’re a trained comedy duo. I mentioned here that maybe she’ll go to Briar Valley for her 4th year internship and develop stronger bonds with the Diasomnia characters (and mainly Malleus) through her work. I think maybe Lilia recognized those similarities and that’s why he’s so excited to that Malleus has found a potential friend of his own accord.

It’s usually Raven being the “Fairy Godmother” to others by writing the stories that others wish to see themselves in—but now Malleus has usurped the role for himself, and he’s her Fairy Godmother. I think Malleus likes to be the one making others happy (as some sort of coping mechanism for his own inadequacies). Book 7 is obviously one huge example, but another is Endless Halloween Night. His whole motivation for what he did was that ghosts that arrived late for the holiday wouldn’t feel like they had missed out. He also has a strong sense of duty and protectiveness to his people, stating that he was told that the Draconias are powerful so they can protect the smiles of their people. Malleus is… very socially awkward around his peers (to say the least), but his desire to make others happy even if the logic is sometimes twisted is genuine.

When I think about it, I feel as though this kind of sentiment would extend to how Malleus views Raven. Her entire existence is also one of loneliness and wishing to belong, but constantly gaslighting herself into thinking that she can’t be “a main character” like everyone else, that she’s just a footnote or a supporting character in the story. She’s an outcast, just like he is, even if for different reasons. Again, Maleficent and Diablo energy— That would probably make Malleus sympathize with her and want to ensure she has her “happy ending”.

As Raven spirals deeper and deeper into her dream, he looks on with pride. This is his work. He’s done go much good, Malleus tells himself. Just look at her big dumb grin. Then—suddenly—BAM!! The doors to the ball venue are kicked in, and the orchestral music screeches to a halt. In storm Yuu and Grim, flanked on either side by Silver and Sebek, their boots on the door they just took down. “We’ve come to rescue the princess.”

“She’s in need of no such thing. It is you who are the monsters come to steal her away and lock her in a tower,” Malleus would probably say. She’s in a confused daze, wondering why suddenly her classmates are acting “out of character” in her dream world. There’s supposed to be a musical number going on right now, not a fight about to break out on the dance floor.

“Raven, please listen to us. This—” Silver gestures to the glittering lights and decorations. All smoke and mirrors. “—none of it is real. You’re still Night Raven College’s storyteller. Our storyteller. Please… open your eyes! Wake up!!”

“Do not listen to a word he says. He is an uninvited guest come to crash the celebration.” A mist seems to fall over her eyes. Once so bright and filled with curiosity, now clouded over and dull. She quietly seeps back into the waiting arms of some fabricated mystery man promising to whisk her away.

“ROUSE YOURSELF AT ONCE, BIRD!! We didn’t come all this way to be turned away at the door!!” Sebek shouts, snapping her lucidity back for a second with the sheer magnitude of his volume. “HOW WEAK OF HEART YOU MUST BE TO SUCCUMB TO THESE LIES! I THOUGHT YOU STRONGER THAN THAT!”

“Sebek.” Malleus’s lip curls, his tone patient but dangerous. “So even you have turned traitor. What a plot twist for the pages.”

Sebek balks at his liege’s words—he’s having difficulties speaking his true feelings in front of the man he has revered his entire life. Guilt and shame fill him. That’s when Yuu steps up, Grim nestled in their arms.

“Miss Raven, let’s go home together,” Yuu suggests. “Everyone’s waiting for us. There’s so many stories left to tell.”

“Everyone… waiting? Stories to tell…” She blinks a few times—

“ENOUGH!!” Malleus’s voice thunders, loud enough to rattle the entire ballroom. “I will not allow one more second of this drivel. The young Crowley has dreamed her entire life of this very moment—yet you would rob her of it? I will put an end to this myself…! This story is mine to pen—for the sake of every single happy ending!!”

[lavampira]

(COUNT)DOWN TO DAWNTRAIL — day seven: free day

one thing about ffxiv that has had the biggest impact on me is the core message in the power of bonds that people forge. camaraderie is as much of a driving force as hope throughout the game’s overarching narrative, and it’s the main part of what made me invest in it so quickly, and why I continue to love playing it.

and so, keeping on that theme, I want to take the opportunity to gush about some of the people who’ve also made the game and community a lovely experience over the last 2 years.

first, I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention how glad I am that @hythlodaes and @birues came with me from swtor to give this game a try. it’s always so nice to have a friend who understands you so intuitively like gigi does with me when trying new things without judgement, building fun routines together in a new game, risking it all as an AST-DRK duo in frontlines, or slipping back into our old co-tanking roots, and she’s been my biggest emotional support and favorite guinea pig to level new things. and rue’s eternal willingness to fuck it we ball with me and all of her thoughtful meta and silly memes alike bring me so much happiness. I’ve loved sharing all the developing lore of our ocs and thoughts on the story as we’ve progressed mostly alongside each other.

I will also forever be grateful to @coldshrugs and @gefiltefished for all of their guidance when I was a sprout learning the game! azia and ash have always been so helpful and encouraging, and many of my fondest memories of the early raids, trials, and pre-duty support dungeons involve one or both of them holding my hand, and even braving queues to tank or heal for me at times despite being aiming mains until I was brave enough to consistently tank myself. they built up much of my confidence while venturing into a new mmo and I don’t think I would understand things as well as I do without either of them.

getting to know @scionshtola as we played more, dragging each other into the mines and bozja respectively, and bonding over same taste in dps jobs has been such a highlight, too. and so many of my frontlines assists are owed to them channeling a hidden inner zenos on the battlefield as well.

raiding with my extremes static in our brave little sparkle has been some of the most fun and challenging few months! @lilas is an absolute powerhouse of organizing, keeping the positive mood alive, and wrangling everyone into voice chat and party on time each week. azia is an excellent strategist and gentle advice-giver, which has gotten us to barrel through barriers that had us stumped at times. @zimmena is a radiant gem for crafting our tinctures, making consistent calls to move us through the mechanics, filling in any role that’s needed, and my partner in repairs. I owe @greyyourwarden my life many times over for keeping me alive or scraping me off the floor when things go awry as a very trustworthy healer, and trusting me without complaint despite healer instincts when I ask to be allowed to die for my invuln. gigi has not only been a powerful and attentive melee dps amidst our sea of ranged/casting players, but a cheerfully good sport when a stray tankbuster goes her way, too. kels and their carby have saved many, many pulls with a well-timed raise, and always is my reliable stack buddy. @the-rogue-mockingjay is a brave soul willing to try new things and brings so much enthusiasm to raid. and @galadae has been a trooper for filling in whenever we needed someone and picking up things so quickly despite the occasional short notice. I’m so proud of how much we’ve all grown as players and as teammates since the very first night!

my foray into crafting and gathering has also been greatly helped by the many tips from @impossible-rat-babies and the set of endgame gear graciously offered and made for me by @lxdymaria so I’d have an easier time once I was leveled.

and I’ve also enjoyed talking to and seeing posts by @drk-brain, @drkmissionaries, and other sidwol shippers and dark knight enjoyers over on the bird site, collectively boosting all the writing and losing our minds over our little guys and the big spiky man we all love.

I could keep going - the ffxiv playerbase is truly one of the most friendly, encouraging, and wonderful communities - but I’ll leave it here: ffxiv is a game full of love and support from the people we meet along the way, so it’s no wonder why it’s fostered such a similar space for all of us!

[ghostxrose]

𝑶𝒇 𝑴𝒐𝒏𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒔 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝑴𝒆𝒏 | 𝑩𝒂𝒌𝒖𝒈𝒐 𝑲𝒂𝒕𝒔𝒖𝒌𝒊 𝒙 𝑶𝑪

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part Seven |

Summary ~ The war between humanity and aliens began in 2013 when the first Kaiju hauled itself out of the depths of the ocean. It rampaged through three cities, destroying everything in its path and killing thousands before it was finally taken down. As more Kaiju emerged from the sea, nations put aside rivalries and hatred in order to ban together and find a solution to save the human race.

Azusa had never imagined that this would be the world that she would grow up in. Mankind using giant robots to take down massive alien monsters sounds like the stuff of movies not the reality that she’s forced to live. She had also never imagined signing herself up to battle the monsters from the sea, but somebody needed to avenge her brother’s death and her father sure as hell wasn’t doing it.

Tags/Warnings ~ Fem!OC, angst, hurt/comfort, eventual fluff, enemies to friends to lovers, slow burn, potentially triggering content, universe-typical violence, Enji Todoroki (yes, that is a warning, he's trash), character death, suicidal ideation, (more tags to be added as story develops <3)

Note ~ Heyy, Lovelies! This fic is my twist on MHA characters in the Pacific Rim universe. I am absolutely obsessed with Pacific Rim, it's probably my most favorite movie! So this fic is my mash up of two of my fave things. It is xOC instead of xReader, but I hope that you enjoy it all the same. I'm one of those readers who will imagine myself as the main character no matter what, so this can be read as reader-insert. Anyway, enough with my rambling, enjoy the story My Lovelies! <3

“Get going, Azusa!” He says with urgency as he ushers her out of the kitchen.

“I’m not fucking going anywhere without you, Toya! I have a bad feeling about this one! Please listen to me, don’t go with Dad!” She pleads over the sounds of their younger siblings crying.

“Dammit Azusa, I have to! Dad doesn’t have another co-pilot! We’ll be fine, just go!” He borderline shouts at her as he makes his way to the door.

“Don’t go! Please, don’t go!” She cries, grabbing his arm and pulling him away from the door.

“Fucking let me go! This is a job, Azusa, and I’ve been called to go do it! Go help Mom with Natsuo, Fuyumi, and Shoto!” He yells, ripping his arm out of her grasp and rushing out the door, slamming it shut behind him.

“Dammit, Toya-”

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

Jolting upright in her bed, chest heaving and tears wetting her face, Azusa slams the button on her alarm. Letting out a groan, she wipes at her face and tries to even out her breathing. It takes a few minutes, as it always does, but she finally manages to recover and drags herself out of bed.

“Thanks, subconscious.” She mumbles bitterly as she makes her way to the bathroom. She goes through the motions of her everyday routine; getting dressed, putting her hair up, brushing her teeth, staring at the old family vacation photo on her dresser for too long.. Numbly, she finishes lacing up her boots, then stands up ready to answer the door for the knock she knows is coming.

The predicted knock does happen and she opens the door to greet her sister, “Morning, Fuyumi.” She says as she steps out of her room, closing the door behind her and locking it.

“Good morning, Azusa! You ready for today?” Fuyumi asks her as the two make their way to the elevator.

“As ready as I’ll ever be, I guess.” She says with a slight shrug as they step into the elevator.

After pressing the button for the Mess Hall, Fuyumi joins her sister in leaning against the back wall of the elevator. She bumps her shoulder against Azusa’s with a small playful smile on her face.

“It’s a big day for you, kinda thought you’d be more hyped.” She comments, her features taking on a bit of concern.

“It’s just another day, Yumi. Just another day of being one of his soldiers that he couldn’t give less of a damn about.” Azusa replies in an emotionless tone to cover up the anger burning beneath her skin.

Fuyumi lets out a heavy sigh as the elevator doors open, “He does care, Zusa… And I know that it won’t be the same without Toya there to cheer you on.. but it’s been three years. There was nothing more you could have done that day to stop him. He’s gone, you’re here, and you worked your ass off to get to this point. You deserve to feel excited about today.” She says tiredly as they walk up to the food line.

“Yeah..” Azusa responds quietly, letting the conversation fizzle out. They fill up their trays with no further conversation being made, then head for a table with open seating.

Unfortunately for both of them the only table with open seating just so happens to be next to the table that Katsuki Bakugo and his group are sitting at. Azusa rolls her eyes at the comments and praises she hears being thrown the blonde’s way as she sits down. It’s been two years since her group entered the Ranger Program and Bakugo’s arrogant personality hasn’t dimmed a bit. Not even being behind the scenes during humanity’s war against aliens has done anything to lessen his pompous attitude.

“Who do you think you’ll be Drift-compatible with, Bakugo?” Azusa hears Mina’s perky voice ask.

“I don’t think any of you extras could handle being in my head and I sure as hell don’t wanna be in any of your idiotic brains. I’m just gonna ask the Marshal to let me pilot by my damn self.” Bakugo replies with a tone full of annoyance, earning himself a few gasps of shock and a bit of laughter.

“Oh c’mon man, you know single piloting is impossible even with the tech we have now! Plus, I think we’d be Drift-compatible! We work well together and we’re both super manly!” She hears Kirishima exclaim and she lets out a small huff of laughter at the pose she knows he’s doing even without looking at him.

“I don’t need a damn co-pilot and if I am forced to have one, it better not be any of you idiots!” Bakugo bites out and Azusa rolls her eyes once again as she digs into her breakfast.

“What a jerk, Dad’s gonna be pissed if Bakugo actually puts in that request,” Fuyumi comments quietly before taking a sip of her juice.

Azusa silently nods her head in absentminded agreement as she takes another bite. Suddenly, everyone around her quiets down, their heads bowing in respect and words becoming low whispers.

“Good morning, Rangers.” Marshal Todoroki greets, his booming voice echoing throughout the Mess Hall and demanding attention.

“As many of you know, today is the day that groups A through D will be testing to find their Drift-compatibility partners, or rather, their co-pilots. All other groups will be excused from their training to witness the event, but do not mistake this as a free day. Learn something from what you witness. As for groups A through D, tests will begin at 0800. Be prepared and be on time.” He continues, his stern tone making everyone give an intimidated nod of understanding.

“Ranger Azusa Todoroki,” Marshal Todoroki calls out, causing everyone’s eyes to turn toward the girl. Azusa clenches her jaw and her eyes meet the cold blue ones of her father.

“Come to my office once you have finished breakfast. Thank you, everyone, you may carry on.” He finishes with a slight bow of his head before he and his second-in-command, Marshal Shota Aizawa, turn to leave. Noise ensues once again with the disappearance of the Marshal’s presence. Meaningless chatter and the clattering of dishware fill the room, but one voice, in particular, catches Azusa’s attention as very much intended by the voice’s owner.

“Aww, the princess get in trouble, again?” Bakugo’s taunting comment grates at Azusa’s eardrums and her grip on her chopsticks tightens.

Other than the whitening of her knuckles, she gives no reaction toward the blonde, her eyes cast down toward her food tray despite wanting to glare at Bakugo. She numbly finishes her breakfast, tells Fuyumi that she’ll see her later, then stands to clear her place. She can feel eyes on her as she takes her tray to the trash bin, but she maintains her facade of emotionless neutrality as she walks out of the Mess Hall.

“The fuck does the old man want now?” She mumbles out angrily under her breath as she steps into the elevator.

Jamming her finger against the button for the floor that the Marshal’s office is on, she lets out a long breath. Stepping back to the middle of the elevator, Azusa crosses her arms over her chest and closes her eyes. A minute or two passes and the elevator groans as it comes to a stop. She prepares herself, mentally and physically, to step out of the elevator when the doors begin to open but pauses when she comes face to face with Marshal Todoroki.

“Marshal?” She questions, bowing her head slightly, confusion flashing over her features before she settles back into her neutral state.

“We will be going down to the Shatterdome instead.” Marshal Todoroki says, his voice taking on a much different tone than earlier.

He stares at Azusa with an expectant look as he waits for her to move back so that he can step into the elevator. Azusa shakes the confusion from her mind and dutifully steps back to let the large man through the doorway. Tense silence fills the cramped-feeling space as she presses the button for the Shatterdome. The elevator groans once again as it begins descending.

“Why are we going to the Shatterdome, Sir?” Azusa asks, tone neutral and emotionless and the Marshal lets out a tired sigh.

“Azusa, please, it’s just the two of us you can call me da-”

“I stopped calling you that a long time ago, Enji. Why would I start again now? Just tell me why you wanted me to meet with you instead of letting me go get ready for my Drift-compatibility tests.” Azusa bites out, cutting off her father’s words.

Marshal Todoroki’s jaw clenches and his fists clench before the tension deflates from his body and a look of defeat fills his features, “I want to show you something.” He replies vaguely and Azusa sends him an incredulous look.

“You want to show me something?? This is ridiculous! I need to be getting ready, not dealing with your feeble attempts at earning my forgiveness ba-” Azusa’s anger gets the better of her until she cuts herself off, clamping her mouth shut as the elevator doors open.

Marshal Todoroki stays silent as they step out of the elevator, only opening his mouth to greet others. They move through the hustle and bustle of the Shatterdome, walking past Jaeger after Jaeger and all of the people working on said Jaegers. They finally stop at the far end of Bay 12, both of them turning their bodies toward the Jaeger standing tall against the wall. Azusa’s neck cranes as she looks up at the gigantic robot, a tidal wave of emotions flooding her as she takes it in.

“Bravo Inferno,” Azusa whispers out, tears building up on her lash lines and the Marshal quietly nods from beside her. “The day Toya died.. I thought she was too destroyed to salvage, I mean, you barely came back in one piece.. H-how is she here?” She asks, her voice thick with emotion and tears slipping down her face.

“It took the repair techs a long time, but they were able to put her back together. In fact, she’s better than she was before.. on the inside, that is. I made sure the outside was redone to look the same as when she first came out of production.” Marshal Todoroki says quietly, his hands clasped behind his back professionally but his face full of emotions.

Azusa stares up at her brother’s old Jaeger with a mixture of awe and sadness. The blue flame-colored paint reflects the lights of the Shatterdome, giving it a pearlescent shine. Bravo Inferno’s emblem, a flaming phoenix, is stamped proudly on the left side of its chest along with the numbers from the year it was made. From head to toe, the Jaeger looks just like it had the day Azusa watched it leave the base being piloted by her brother for the last time.

“What was the point of this?” Azusa asks, coming back to her senses and remembering that she is standing with the man responsible for her brother’s death. “You piloting again or something?”

Still looking up at Bravo Inferno, the Marshal shakes his head, “No, my piloting days are long since over with. I’m passing Bravo Inferno on to you, Azusa. It’s.. it’s what Toya would have wanted had he thought the war would still be going on.” He says looking at Azusa with the ghost of a smile on his saddened face.

It takes a moment for Azusa to work past the lump in her throat, to straighten her back even though she wants to fall to her knees and sob. A strained “thank you” makes its way out of her mouth as she blinks away the tears in her eyes.

𖤛 𖤛 𖤛

Azusa cracks her knuckles before crossing her arms and waiting for the tests to begin. She and the other Rangers who will be testing today are gathered around the training mats, most idly chatting as they wait for Marshal Todoroki and Marshal Aizawa. She does a quick glance around and sees some of the other Rangers stretching, so she follows suit.

“Hey, Azusa!” Someone calls out excitedly right as Azusa hears footsteps approaching her. Turning her head, she catches sight of Tetsutetsu and Kendo making their way toward her. She sends them a small smile and waves, Tetsutetsu’s bright smile making her want to put on sunglasses.

“Hey guys,” she says when the two get up to her, narrowly dodging Tetsutetsu when he tries to engulf her in a hug.

“You nervous?” Kendo asks when the three of them fall back into warm-up stretches.

“Nope. I just hope that I get a good co-pilot.” Azusa answers simply as she leans further into a leg lunge.

“How are you not nervous?? Literally, everyone will be watching; Rangers, Rangers-in-training, Marshal Aizawa, Marshal Todoroki.. You’re seriously not nervous about your dad watching the tests??” Tetsutetsu rambles out before he is whacked upside the head by Kendo.

“Dude, shut up!” Kendo reprimands and Azusa huffs out a laugh.

“No, I’m not nervous. I don’t care who’s watching.” Azusa says with a shrug of her shoulders.

“Attention, Rangers!” Marshal Aizawa’s stern voice calls out and everyone stands at attention.

“At ease,” Marshal Todoroki calls out next as he steps up next to Marshal Aizawa. Everyone relaxes but keeps their full attention on the two men at the front of the room.

“We’ll go over a brief explanation of how the tests will work, then we’ll get started.” Marshal Aizawa starts as the bleachers along the walls of the room begin filling with the other groups of Rangers-in-training that aren’t testing.

“The tests will work like this; one-on-one melee combat with bo staffs. You all have been broken up into smaller groups based on your results from previous Drift simulations and screenings. These one-on-ones will help better identify who exactly you work well with. Remember Rangers, these are dialogues, not fights. The goal is to find a co-pilot that keeps up with your moves and keeps the scores even. Should one of you outright win a match then we’ll know that person is not a match for you. The cementing stage of this test will occur at a later date when you and your co-pilot are assigned a Jaeger and go through your first real Drift together.” Marshal Aizawa explains in his normal serious yet tired tone.

“Rangers Bakugo, Kirishima, Tetsutetsu, Todoroki, Kendo, and Hado, grab your bo staffs then step onto the mat. Each of you will have one match with each other then Marshal Todoroki and I will review your scores later. Your co-pilots will be announced tomorrow if we get through everyone’s tests today. Marshal Todoroki, if you would choose the starting pairings, please,” Marshal Aizawa says and Marshal Todoroki scans over the six Rangers lined up in front of him.

“Kendo with Bakugo, Tetsutetsu with Hado, and Kirishima with Todoroki.” Marshal Todoroki says, tone firm as always and his gaze already full of judgment.

“Rangers spread out across the mat with your respective opponent and assume position. You will begin when I say so.” Marshal Aizawa commands and the Rangers listen accordingly.

Once they’ve reached a space far enough away from the other pairs, Azusa faces Kirishima with her bo staff positioned diagonally in front of her. She takes in a deep breath, steadying the few nerves that have crept into her system, and bends her knees slightly ready to move to either defend or attack. Kirishima does the same, winking at her when their eyes meet with a playful smirk on his face.

“Rangers begin,” Marshal Aizawa commands, and the pairs begin their matches.

The match between Bakugo and Kendo ends quickly with the score being; Bakugou 4 and Kendo 1. That’s not to say that Kendo didn’t try her best to keep up with Bakugou, it’s just that the blonde was relentless. Despite them all being told that the matches were supposed to flow like dialogues and not fights, it’s just like Katsuki Bakugo to do his own thing. Tetsutetsu and Hado’s match ended a bit better with their scores being; Hado 4 and Tetsutetsu 2. In both of their typical fashions, they shook hands at the end of the match, both of them wearing confident smiles.

Kirishima and Azusa started out neck and neck, but that changed quickly when Azusa got the upper hand. Their match ended with the scores being; Azusa 4 and Kirishima 2. Azusa helped Kirishima up after her final time taking him down and wished him good luck on his next match. Kirishima, being the ever-bright ray of sunshine that he is, smiled warmly at her and thanked her for a good match.

The next three rounds of matches seemed to fly by while simultaneously feeling dragged out. Azusa had won by 1 point against both Hado and Kendo, which made her feel pretty good about ending up being co-pilots with either of them. She, unfortunately, lost by 2 points against Tetsutetsu and she was a little disappointed by the fact that one of her two best friends wasn’t a very good match for her to be co-pilots with. At the end of their, match Tetsutetsu gave her an encouraging smile and told her that he would have been honored to be co-pilots with her.

“Time for the final matches for the first six Rangers. The pairings will be as follows; Hado with Kendo, Tetsutetsu with Kirishima, and Bakugo with Todoroki. Get ready, Rangers.” Marshal Aizawa calls out, and Azusa’s entire being fills with dread.

“Prepared to lose, Princess?” Bakugo goads arrogantly as the two get into position and Azusa’s blood boils a bit.

Marshal Aizawa tells them to begin and Bakugo doesn’t hesitate to make the first move. Azusa blocks his bo staff a couple of times but ultimately Bakugo lands a hit to her shoulder.

“1-0.” Bakugo comments with a cocky smirk.

Not wasting another moment, Azusa swings her bo staff knocking the blonde’s bo staff away and rushing him. With quick movements, she brings her bo staff up, then swings it down, stopping it only inches from his face.

“1-1.” She says quietly, challenging him with her eyes while her face remains neutral.

They go back and forth for what feels like hours, both of them having stopped keeping track of the score after they hit 2-2. Both of them panting and sweating, their match continues on and on until a booming voice pierces the bubble they seem to be in.

“That’s enough! Bakugo, Todoroki, your match is over. Put your bo staffs away and get on the sidelines.” Marshal Todoroki sternly tells the two and Bakugo releases Azusa from the hold he had her in.

The blonde stands and walks off to put his bo staff away, not bothering to offer Azusa help. The two don’t even look at each other once they’re both situated on the sidelines of the training mat, standing as far away from each other as possible. Kendo and Tetsutetsu both send Azusa twin looks of surprise mixed with heavy confusion, but she chooses to ignore them in favor of watching the next group of matches.

Note ~ I know that there may not be much to go off of but let me know what you think so far! Should I post chapter/part 2 sooner than planned? Idk, I'm just loving how the story is turning out and wanted to share it with yall! I love and appreciate you, Lovelies! <3

Ps, @tr-mha-fan I'm doing my best to work on your (second) request, I promise that I didn't ignore your ask, Lovely! <3

Tag List ~ @tomiokasecretlover

Divider Credit ~ @animatedglittergraphics-n-more

[whatislovevavy]

8. What Am I Supposed to Do Now?

Jake Seresin x OC (Caledonia Hughes)

WC: 2.8k

Masterlist  Previous Part   Next Part

Warnings: swearing, mentions of smut (18+),  mostly angst

AN: This one’s angsty y’all, not gonna lie. And a bit shorter than the others, but fear not, the next one will be longer :) Thank you @sebsxphia for the encouragement to write this story when it was in development, it means the world <3 Also a big thank you to @royallyprincesslilly for the design of the divider.

Please consider leaving a comment, a tip, or reblogging, leaving likes doesn't do anything on this hellsite. It helps with motivation when writing and the tips help since I’m between jobs at the moment :)

All of my writings will be added to my writing side blog @sophs-writing-nook 

These characters, except for Caledonia and Ella, are obviously not my own. This is an 18+ fanfic, so minors scoot pls. You are responsible for the media you consume. Do not copy, plagiarize, repost, or translate this fic without my explicit permission as it is my own creation. 

Jake pensively hit the backspace button on his phone's touch pad. 

He knew at the back of his mind that he should be telling you this in person.

The swing of the break room door broke him from his stare at his screen.

"Anyways, we're going on a date next Saturday to the aquarium in the city," Bradley said with a small lopsided smirk as he walked in with Natasha and Javy. 

"What's this I hear about Rooster finally getting a woman to go out with him?" 

Rooster flipped Jake off as he got his lunch from the fridge, making Natasha let out a small laugh, and Javy quirk his lip. 

"So what's her name, how'd you meet her?"

Bradley closed the fridge with a click, striding towards the table Jake was settled at. 

"Her name's Ella, she's a grad student at UC San Diego. Met her at that coffee place you recommended last week, got her number, and have been texting since." 

He flashed Jake a grin. 

Jake furrowed his brows, a soft hum leaving his lips. 

It couldn't have been your Ella, could it? UC San Diego was a big school, there was definitely more than one Ella there.

Soon Javy and Phoenix joined them at the table. 

"What?"

Rooster broke him from his deep in thought glance as he softly stirred the left over beef stew.

But at this point, he couldn’t stomach the previously delicious stew you made for him. It only served as a reminder of what he was about to do, and for what he didn’t have the courage to do. 

"Nothing, Caledonia has a friend in her grad program named Ella." 

Bradley’s lip quirked.

“Cali is biochem, right?”

Jake nodded. 

A soft hum left Bradley’s lips, “Yeah, that might be the same one. So, noticed you’ve been spending a lot of time with her lately, what's the deal?”

Jake felt his heart freeze.

He shrugged, nonchalantly, trying to exude that same Hangman confidence and bravado.

“Nothing too serious, just helped out with a few things Penny asked me to do for her.”

Natasha almost bent her fork in her hand as his words registered. 

Did he not know how much he meant to her?

Jake could feel her piercing stare, but chose to keep his attention on Bradshaw. 

Javy’s gaze was more marked with the subtle signs of pity as he worked his way through his wrap. 

Jake couldn’t decide which one felt worse. 

Rooster took a bite of his lunch, “ya know, I’ve been meaning to ask, why do you call her by her full name?”

Was it getting hot in here? He wouldn’t be surprised if the answer was yes, considering the time of year. 

If Javy hadn’t known him all these years, he would have missed the flash of panic behind the thick curtain of confidence that was slowly becoming a thin veil. 

He shrugged, “I was always taught to treat women that give me booze with the utmost respect, hence the full name.”

Bradshaw nodded, letting his eyebrows raise, “But what about Penny? You call her Pen all the time.”

Natasha smirked slightly around her forkful of lunch. 

Jake swallowed, “Well, that’s different… I’ve known Penny for a lot longer than Caledonia.”

Rooster leaned back, furrowing his brow, and biting the inside of his cheek. 

“Ok, but why did you leave the Hard Deck with her last week?”

Jake took a deep breath, “She needed help with her car before she headed home. I was at the bartop paying my tab and Penny asked me to help her. What is this anyway? An interrogation? You gonna ask me about every woman I’ve talked to?”

Bradshaw smirked, “Just curious, Bagman, no need to get defensive,” he put his hands up in surrender, thoroughly enjoying seeing his former rival riled up. 

Javy bit back a smile. 

"Yeah, Bagman, don't need to get your panties in a bunch." 

Natasha smirked as Jake shot her daggers. 

"If I were wearing panties, they would be the most unbunched pair you'd ever seen." 

Jake grumbled, sending a glare to his teammates as they laughed and snorted. 

“Plus, it’s not that way with her. We’re just friends.”

Jake took a spoonful of stew, purposefully avoiding his colleagues unimpressed glances. 

“Right.”

Jake glared as Phoenix took a bite of her sandwich.

“Alright, I think that’s enough teasing. Can’t waste all our material in one day.”

Javy shot him a wink as Jake flipped him off, his remaining colleagues breaking into soft chuckles.

The topic was diverted to the back burner for the time being, to the point where Jake forgot about the text he planned to send. 

Conversation flowed from when the new recruits were coming in, to summer plans, and to different get togethers on weekends planned within their friend group. 

A small sense of panic ran through him as Phoenix suggested that Caledonia be invited to all of their summer plans. Including their Barbenheimer-themed pool and BBQ party in July.

He guaranteed Caledonia wouldn’t want to come if he was there after the message he was typing out was sent. 

Soon it was time to wrap up and head back out to the briefing room and get ready to fly in the latter portion of the day.

Jake took one last pensive glance at his phone.

This is better. For the both of us.

Jaw tensing, he pressed send. 

He cleaned up the rest of his lunch and left the breakroom in a silence coated by the soft buzzing of the overhead lights and the impending crack of broken hearts.

—

A sigh left your lips. 

How could you have been so stupid?

You should have read the label more clearly before measuring it out. 

Your mind swam with detrimental thoughts of the days failed experiment. 

The cells you spent the previous day growing were wasted when you accidentally put too strong of a solvent after the cells were centrifuged.

It also didn’t help that Ella was away presenting at a conference at the other side of the country.

Frankly, you just wanted to go home, take a nice shower, nestle into your sheets, and forget about the frustrating day you got out of. 

A sigh left your lips as you settled into the drivers seat of your car, feeling your frustration dissipate from your body, and be quickly filled with exhaustion.

You bit the inside of your lip as you waited for your phone to turn on and see any messages you missed. 

The thought of texting Jake to see if he wanted to come over crossed your mind. 

A small smile formed at the thought.

Message from well-fed raccoon :) not downloaded.

You opened the app, tapping on his contact icon. 

Your brows furrowed, heart plummeting to the deepest parts of your chest. 

We shouldn't do this arrangement anymore. I'm sorry. 

You couldn't help but read over the two sentences. Over and over again. Hoping, praying, that they would be something different.

A rattled sigh left your lips, letting your eyes clench shut, and head hit your seat. 

Tears pricked your eyes. A dribble quickly turning into a torrential downpour. 

Soon, your car was wracked with the repeated, frenzied collisions of your head against the upholstery of your driver's seat. 

You stopped with one final hit of your head against the faux leather portion of the head rest, feeling your scowl morph into a groan ridden scowl.

Why the fuck did this have to happen?

What was wrong with you? 

Not only did you have to worry about attracting someone, but now you had to worry about keeping them. 

Was it your weight? 

Your busy schedule? 

Did he find out about your depression? Anxiety?

You did your damndest to ensure that Jake knew nothing of that part of you. 

Your lip quivered as you broke into a sob marked by wails and sniffles, no different from that of a wounded animal. 

God, you couldn’t help but feel that this was coming. 

This arrangement; it was all too good to be true. 

You scoffed through your tears. 

You shouldn’t have been so stupid. 

He was called Hangman for a reason. 

Your virginity. Your very first experiences with sex.

Your eyes shut as you realized the gravitas of this risk, only sobbing harder.

What if he had only wanted you because you’d never been with anyone else?

This was absolutely devastating. 

The world was crashing down around you. You couldn’t breathe with how hard you had started crying, unable to help the feeling of violation that invaded your veins like a poison, turning your blood to a thick sludge, making your heart beat like an engine in overdrive to compensate. 

In your blurry eyed, emotionally compromised state, you only wanted to hear one voice.

Penny’s.

She’d understand.

You didn’t want to explain to your mom that you developed a ‘situationship’ with a deadly man and that it bit you in the ass. Hard. 

The familiar rumble of the engine filled your car. You swiped away at the continuously flowing tears and mustered enough energy and a sliver of mental clarity to get home safe. 

—

“Hey, Cali, how was-”

Penny’s word died on her lips.

The sunny San Diego weather backdropped your teary, red eyes and cheeks, curled lips, and tears streaming down your pretty face. 

“Oh, sweetheart,” she strode towards you, encasing you in a hug as you reached out to her, “what’s wrong?”

You sniffled, burying your face into her sweater-clad shoulder.

“Sweetheart, I can’t hear you.”

You lifted your head from her chest. 

“Jake doesn’t want me anymore.” 

Penny’s heart broke at the sight, gently pulling you back to her, wrapping you in her embrace as sobs wracked your body. 

Her heart continued to crack for you with each sob and gasp you let out, gently running her hand through your hair.

You tried not to think about how Jake would do the same thing when he kissed you. 

He used to bring you so much joy, but now you felt hypersensitive to even the thought of Hangman. 

Touching you. 

Speaking to you. 

Looking at you. 

How he cuddled with you when you slept over that one night.

How he made breakfast with you the next morning.

How he knew your favorite flavor of gelato from Francisco’s. 

How he bought you $300 worth of sex toys.

Was this all some kind of sick game to him? 

It made your breathing difficult and skin crawl. 

How could you have let someone in so close, and know every inch of your body?

“Shhh, Caledonia, it’s ok… let it out.”

Penny knew that Hangman had a reputation. Anyone who frequented the Hard Deck knew that.

But she saw the way he looked at Caledonia when she was busy preparing drinks. Or when she was fixing the juke box. Or wiping down tables. 

Penny’s hope for the relationship to succeed was overshadowed by the bubbling sense of anger in her belly. 

How could Hangman do such a thing to you? 

What was your situation with him exactly?

She continued to soothe you. 

“Cali, I’m so sorry… would you want me to call Ella to come over?”

You shook your head, “Ella’s at a conference, and I don’t want to make her worried,” the lump in your throat evident with each break from sniffling.

Penny’s eyebrows furrowed.

You didn’t tell your bestfriend, because you didn’t want to worry her?

Hangman was such an asshole for letting you go. 

To both himself, and you. 

“Ok, I’m going to call Halo and Phoenix and see if they can come over. Ok? Would that help?”

You nodded, lip quivering as another round of sobs made your body crumple against hers. 

“What am I," sniffle, "supposed to do now?” 

Your sob-ridened words made Penny’s heart ache as she watched the bright, beautiful, smart girl she knew be deduced to a sobbing mess.

If she could help it, Hangman wouldn’t be allowed to step foot into her bar without being overboarded. 

So she did the next best thing; holding you in her open doorway as you sobbed into her knitted top.

“It’s ok, sweetheart…shhh… it's going to be ok.”

That only made you cry harder.

—

Jake’s front door opened with a click, taking his shoes off with a soft thud, not bothering to arrange them on the floor with the rest.

He went through the motions of preparing dinner; the last remaining portion of the beef stew you made him.

His jaw tensed at the sight of the transparent hazel and oak bark brown stew staining the sides of the plastic container on the counter.

How was it so easy for something to go from warming the deepest darkest parts of his soul to being the equivalent of lead, coating his insides and making it hard to breathe?

Shouldn’t I be relieved?

Just as he suspected, the stew didn’t bring him the sense of comfort it did only a mere few days ago.

He sighed, languidly twisting and turning his spoon in the stew, moving the typically delectable sauteed mushrooms and tender beef around. 

Now they just made his stomach churn. 

Maybe it wasn’t ever the stew itself that was warm and comforting.

Maybe it was the fact that you were the one who made it.

You.

He continued to absentmindlessly stir, the familiar jingle of keys near the front door meeting his ears. 

“You’re home late.”

Jake’s seemingly dulled down tone made Javy furrow his eyebrows as he continued to undo his shoes. 

“Picked up something for Delilah.”

Jake only gave a small hum. 

“Everything alright?”

Jake took a deep exhale, avoiding his wingman’s gaze.

“Yeah,” he coughed,” yeah, I’m fine just tired.”

Javy stared as he trudged towards the stairs, his bowl of half finished left on the table.

His all too familiar air of confidence was elsewhere. 

As Javy heard Jake’s door shut, his phone buzzed. 

Phoenix: We need to talk. Can you meet at the Hard Deck tomorrow?

—

Jake couldn’t take his eyes off the ceiling as he laid on his bed. 

He should feel relieved. 

Relationships were never his strong suit, meaning he avoided them like the plague. 

He’d done it once, and never again. 

It was too…painful. Heart wrenching. Traumatizing. 

One-night stands were easier. Always easier. 

This arrangement was supposed to be just that. 

He’d help you out, teach you the ropes and then wish you luck on your future relationships. 

That was it. 

He was supposed to move on with his day without seeing things in his everyday life and not think about you. 

Not think, “Caledonia would love this”, or “ This would make her smile.”

You weren’t supposed to have an infectious smile, or a laugh that made him wish for glimpses of a future together, or be able to moan and whine so prettily that he would drown in if he could. 

Your lips weren’t supposed to be soft. Or sweet. Or pretty. 

Hell, you weren’t supposed to look as beautiful as you did in that velvet dress at Admiral Cain’s retirement ball. Or as you walked towards him in his booth at Fransisco’s. Or as you opened the door when he was supposed to teach you how to give a blowjob. Or as you stood before him in front of the mirror in the dressing room of Pleasures of the 3rd Kind.

Or when he first saw your body without the hindrance of clothes. 

But the state of dress, or undress, didn’t change how he saw you.

It was all you.

You. 

He could feel his heart beat faster and cheeks heat as reminisced on his moments with you. 

But those moments seemed to dwarf in comparison to his moments with you outside of your lessons together. 

Getting gelato together. 

Playing cards with Amelia. 

Making up a story to get a 15% discount on sex toys.

Slow dancing with you. 

Feeling your lips on his cheek.

Your soft, tender kisses.

Your warm, safe, secure hugs.

Your infectious, warm laugh that made his chest explode with warmth.

How you cared for him so effortlessly.

The fact you took time out of your busy schedule to care of him when he was sick. 

He hadn’t been taken care of like that since he left home. 

Those moments made him feel some sliver of deservance of your affections. Of your devoted, unconditional love.

He wasn’t supposed to feel this way.

He was supposed to be able to move on with his life, like with every one-night stand he’d been with before. 

Say goodbye to you after he ‘hit and split,” and never think about you again.

Or to never feel the need to think about you again. 

It should have been a relief, cutting off this arrangement with you.

But it wasn’t. 

And he’d have to live with that. 

The fact he was stupid enough, scared enough, and selfish enough to let you go.

To not tell you what he needed to tell you.

Jake could feel his ill placed relief morph into a deep rooted sadness in his empty chest.

Like a spoon scrapping the inside of a pomegranate until there was nothing but rind. 

A rattled sigh left his lips, feeling a lump in his throat begin to settle.

What am I supposed to do now?

Taglist: 

@marvel-hotchner @nemesis729 @a-lil-bit-nuts @justagirllivinginaghibliworld @mizzzpink @themusingofagothicsoul @mayhemmanaged @sebsxphia @potato-girl99981  @a-beaverhausen @withahappyrefrain @hangmans-wingman @callmemana @joalslibrary @peachiicherries @mrsjaderogers @entertainmentgal8@jkbindigo11 @princess76179 @clancycucumber230 @teacupsandtopgun

@chaoticassidy @superskittles @cherrycola27 @nancyxsorbet @h-ngm-ns @emma8895eb @djs8891 @novastories @urmom-999 @taytaylala12 @zombicupcake3 @catsficrecs @abaker74 @kmc1989 @hangmanshoney @caidi-paris @i-wanna-be-your-muse @shara-ne @memeorydotcom

[agentnatesewell]

hello, mar, i hope that you’re doing okay ❤️

i just wanted to drop by (?) to let you know that, first of all, i’m completely and utterly in awe by all the love and thoughts that you always seem to put into any type of twc contents; and, second, that i am seriously obsessed with Suri (and N too not gonna lie, jkasjakdjakd). i may or may not have stalked her personal tag already (🙈) but i’ve always been nosy curious, so here’s my ask: are there some more info about Suri (or Nuri!) that you never got the chance to talk about or wanted to expand more? (if you’re willing to share, ofc, no pressure!)

have a lovely day/night! ❤️

~ Gia

Hello hello Gia!! What an absolutely wonderful and nice message! I’m just sitting here with the biggest smile on my face, thank you for taking the time to send this! 🥰🥰

And thank you! Twc has been such comfort media for me for such a while now, I love the story, and I am so excited to see what happens next. I’ve gotten to meet amazing people, some of whom are my best friends now, as well as amazing artists and incredible writers! Such a great place to be! And I’m so glad you’re here, too!!

It means so much you like Suri!! She’s the first oc I’ve really gotten to develop, and I just adore her. Here are some that are new and some that I’ve probably shared before

Suri facts under the cut!

* Suri’s favorite city is Paris, she’s spent time working there after university and it will always have a piece of her heart. Her other favorite is Athens. Speaks French, would love to know Greek

* Growing up, Dana Scully and Fox Mulder (Xfiles) served as her surrogate parents, in the sense that she imagined that’s how Rebecca and Rook’s working relationship was

* Her view on love is shaped by her mother’s love got her father, her father’s love for her mother - and only until Nate has she felt that sort of intensity she imagines they had (so it’s a very high bar!)

* That being said, she loves physical intimacy and has dated a lot, and a lot just for fun and to meet new people and maybe ~the one

* She is obsessed with flowers, and her first job was delivering flowers on her bike on weekends and school breaks from the local flower shop

* Bobby Marks was her first boyfriend, etc and so she always has a soft spot for him

* Suri has a not so secret secret crush on Morgan

* Suri really, really loves Nate. A lot. Very much. Not her first love (see above, high bar) but her true love

Thanks so much again for this very sweet ask!!

[clambuoyance]

Do u want to talk abt ur ocs..... I actually followed you initially bc they seemed so interesting and silly and I want to know more if you feel like sharing :)

I still can’t believe some ppl follow me for my ocs bc it’s usually for my fanart so this is really nice to hear! I have a couple stories/universes but the main one I’ve been…developing (it’s on and off) since I was like 13/14 is about these two kids named Keiko and Rolin!! Im still doing a lot of world and lore building but the main gist is that Rolin is a teenage boy turning 16 who returns to his hometown to live with his aunt and meets a strange young girl named Keiko (debating on making her 10-12 idk she was originally 10). I won’t go too much into like Lore stuff but she has like..my own version of clairvoyance. They are kind of opposites, with Rolin being introverted and jaded, and Keiko being loud and optimistic but they are both silly.

I think it’s been said before but the whole driving relationship of the story is the two of them going on adventures throughout the city and solving mysteries while simultaneously becoming family and finding a real home within each other and the people they’ve met and learned to love 😚

Now the story is centered around Rolin and Keiko, but a big focus is on the cast of characters that fill mostly Rolins life. Mira and Artie were friends with Rolin when they were kids before Rolin left with his mom, and all three grew up and have been living their own lives, but when Rolin comes back they get a chance to reconnect (with Keiko’s help). Valoryn (Val) is also new in town, and befriends Rolin and Keiko. This is just a messy fast doodle of them I have better art in my oc tags🙏

Some old sketches

The other major cast is Rolin’s family, and Rolin has always been Asian so as I worked on the story his family kept getting more and more relevant especially with a major theme of the story being about the connections you have with people in your life so like I can’t leave them out. And I’ve never settled on an Asian ethnicity until recently where I was like I might as well make him Filipino so I can base his family off my own🫡 Cousins (both blood and not) that are years older than you but treat you like siblings and give u silly nicknames 🫶

Now Diana (or Deedee) is one of those characters I’ve had for a long time, and I made her because I liked those laidback mentor figures in anime (like Qrow from rwby) and wanted a laidback lady one 🤷🏻‍♀️ she also has some Misato from nge influence. She has always been written to be a mentor figure to Rolin and Keiko, and at one point I think I was going to make her his actual aunt but stuck to her being just a cousin so I could write about her relationship with her mom 🫶 Unlike her brother Darius, she does not live with her mom and Rolin has to go out of his way to meet her.

And Rolin’s parents’ story aren’t the main focus (they aren’t really present themselves in the main story) and it’s mostly just flashback stuff but they r silly and sad and I love drawing them 😼

I could go into more detail but that’s an overview of some of the characters

[fishy0bishy]

To the stars

Oc story based on @onyxonline Space critters Au

Prologue 

“So Merrit found a house yet. To settle down?” Said her family friend, Patrice who Merrit known for years.

“Wait what? Settling down? I barely finished school and I have to settle down right away?” Merrit said after taking a bite of her food

   “well yeah it’s better to start early so you’re nice and cozy when you’re old” Patrice said as she shrugged 

“But this quick? I’d rather go explore and don’t get me wrong the city is beautiful but I wanna discover more” Merrit sat up and pulling out a journal full of plant information 

 “Yeah but there’s nothing to explore, all the plants here are all named like within the first couple years our kind moved here. Also why would we leave?” “Because what if our knowledge of these plants can help others? It’s big universe out there Patrice.”

  “Merrit it’s my responsibility to watch for you. That’s what your grandmother told me”

     “And I thank you for that but please Patrice hear me out!” 

The Café got quiet when Merrit raised her voice and after a couple of seconds of eye contact and dead silence Patrice sighed  

“do you really want to?”

  “Of course I do! I’ve been developing this kind of soil-“

   “that’s a wrap. Merrit we don’t mess around with what we have, that’s what the neighboring moon tried doing and now they’re going through a famine!” 

  “Famine? Is it wrong I’m barely finding out?”

“Well it happened this past week and it’s barely getting out now.”

 “What happened? And are they sending any Aid from here?” Merrit sat up intrigued 

    “I said too much but I don’t want to make you even more curious so… basically some people tried experimenting on some dirt but something happened and the dirt ended up doing the opposite and wiping out everything. Doesn’t help that the air quality was already bad as it was and made everything worse”

  “And the aid?” 

“Crap you’re not giving up. Well yeah they’re getting people over there this Friday.” 

  “That’s 2 whole days! Can I still go?” 

“I can’t say anything without accidentally revealing something. But here” Patrice said as she reached her pocket and pulled out a messily folded flyer

“A flyer? I thought…Patrice you sure are confusing”

  “Yeah i pulled it off the window to keep you from seeing it but… just sign up and go to the port by Friday in the evening.and pack a lot it’ll be a long while.”

  A bit of silence later Merrit looked up at her old friend and she hugged Patrice from across the table 

  “Thank you”

“… No problem it’s what your Grandma would’ve wanted.”

  “What to survive and not die?”

“No to live your life. A old possum like me can’t keep you back here forever so go. Enjoy it I got the bill and I’ll see you off at the port.

[demvalhaken]

Rawr XD

Sorry that I haven’t been posting a lot, I’m like perpetually tired after school. Maybe I just have low iron.

Ngl this is honestly just a little doodle of Lucifer and Satan. I’m trying to make Lucifer seem less goofy and more intimidating. Anyways, don’t you just hate it when your frenemy asks about who you’re married to?

Also I might be going to my bff’s birthday party because I love them. PRAY FOR ME, I’ve never been to a friend’s house cus I’m way too scared to leave my house :(

Maybe it’s just the neurodivergence

I really wish I could draw more but most of it is shitty doodles and I still really want to write something… the problem is that I just keep giving up, like DAMN Dem literally can’t write a comic or book without dying from boredom. I’ll probably start doing mini comics for fun with my ocs and story (Which you don’t know muahaha)

Anyways here’s a drawing of older Bael like 28 and not 19, this is only a concept cus I don’t know if I’ll make problems for her… I haven’t really developed the whole entire Alrofes problem, yes she’s a problem, her story is long and confusing, and if she reached elderly age in Nephilim years then she’ll get way too powerful… BUT I DONT WANT TO KILL HER OFF, I LOVE HER TOO MUCH!!! She will be evilly invincible and totally not plot armoured a ton… Anyways older Bael is so sillah cus she’s an adult finally yuh. But that’s like 90,000 years from now…

GUYS I CANT STOP COUGHING, I LITERALLY WAS DYING IN CLASS ALL DAY but at least I looked cool doing it yuh. I was binding so that immediately makes me cool, do not disagree, also I’m fine :3 I haven’t had any problems with binding tbh so don’t worry bout’ me

If you dance, I’ll dance… and if you don’t, I’ll dance anyway…

Okay love you guys, and don’t eat people like how my friend just described looking for me at school like “Predator trying to eat its prey” and then I responded with “In what way” and they told that “Demsy that’s disgusting”

[bunnidid-reviews]

I got the second Elle(s) book today and ofc read it soon as I could

Some thoughts:

- this book focuses more heavily on the inner world exploration, and I found the art to be even more dynamic and lovely in this one

- Blue takes over the host position from the previous book, because of the loss of her aunt and shocking revelation that Elle was adopted as a baby. The whole book is about rose Elle finding her way out of the inner world and back to taking control of her life

- we get a little bit more development on the other parts of Elle, since Rose interacts with them as she’s going through each of the inner worlds. But there’s not a lot there, if I’m honest? They all act like strangers that happen to be dragged into the story rather than parts of your very self who’ve always had a sense of being at least connected to you in some way. Especially since its implied that Elle has ‘had problems with this before’, and she purposefully made these inner worlds for each of them, we as the reader are left confused to how much they actually know eachother.. theres just not much there

- and as for Blue, the one part who’s been looming over both this book and the last, we don’t know much about her either, aside from being manipulative and stealing money and clout off her friends. If she’s supposed to be a persecutor part, she has no obvious drive outside just ~being evil~. (To quote my very own blue-colored persecutory part; “What a lazy bitch”)

- this.. ending..?

(The text reads: Wow! Embryos merged? So that means.. I really am six different people! )

Maybe it’s a problem with translation, but the tone of this picture and text really cuts off any of the built up tension thats been riding throughout the book.

- this book never explicitly mentions DID as being a diagnosis, so it’s more of a concept of multiple personalities being used in a different way…

I’m not someone who’s going to speak on what makes ‘enough’ trauma to create DID, because birth complications and adoption are traumatic, and it’s also not something I have experience with. I can’t speak on how this would feel for people who had twins and lost them for it to be portrayed this way, though. In the book, this is clearly stated to be some sort of Special Unreal Circumstance and I found that.. in weird taste..

-it’s not.. DID. I thought the adventuring through the inner worlds would be more about making honest connections and getting to know these parts of her more fully, but Elle’s journey was really just about pulling herself up by the boot straps and switching back out. She doesn’t really have trauma and this book makes it super clear

-I’m disappointed that there wasnt much time spent with brunette Elle because she really seemed to be grieving honestly in the last book, I thought theyd be helping eachother more. But its.. not reallyyy and its shown as growth anyway

-I like the series but I can’t really take it very seriously. It has the vibes of seeing all the major plot points of someone’s OC stuff without all the extra content that fleshes out the characters.

———

I might just be in a mood because I feel very out of place with my own DID at the moment(I’m usually fairly comfortable, but I think I might be having a DPDR episode), but I’ve been sitting on the Elle(s) series for a good few months now, and I don’t really get any deeper connection

I’ll get the next book anyway and see if any of it ties up more neatly. I know its the artists’ first comic I believe, so maybe theres not so much depth becauseeee offff inexperience. Or translation issues because I believe it came out elsewhere first. I dont know!

O well, enjoy my short review

[idontknowreallywhy]

For the fic writers ask game!!

14 how do you write emotional scenes? Do you ever feel what the characters feel? Do you draw from personal experiences?

40 If someone were to make fanart of your work, what fic or scene would you hope to see?

56 What’s something about your writing that you pride yourself on?

p.s. you are definitely a proper writer and a wonderful one!

Rediscovered The Inbox (which tends to hide on the mobile app) -better late than never on a reply??

I did answer 14 already ages ago I think so have been pondering the other two…

40 If someone were to make fanart of your work, what fic or scene would you hope to see?

I actually just commissioned some art on one particular scene which I am beyond excited about and may well get addicted to that process (note to self, check whether hubby is cool with second mortgage purely for multiple art commissions…) so that is kind of a dream come true (I’m getting WIP sketches etc and doing a lot of happy screaming!) but aside from that one…

There are scenes I feel like I’ve described quite well which could be artable but for others the actual picture stayed mostly in my head because I felt the detail would clog the narrative and I think I describe sound and smell better than visual anyway I think? There definitely one I’d love to see but not sure I’ve ever adequately described Estera for anyone to draw her (tho they’d be welcome to try!) but… if I could magically crystallise any image I’ve written it would be the photo she’s looking at here:

Her gaze shifted to the new photo, framed in blue, that she had recently added to her gallery. Yes, and in the last few months… everything had suddenly changed again. But this time in an indisputably good way. Because the imaginary hero had somehow shed the imaginary bit and become her friend. The two of them grinned manically out of the hasty selfie - hair dishevelled, flushed with adrenaline and drenched in seawater but vividly, irrepressibly alive.

Which was taken just after this scene. And yes, Scooter has destroyed another expensive suit 😏

56 What’s something about your writing that you pride yourself on?

I’m going to try to flip something I often worry is a failing in my stories because the reason I haven’t “fixed” it is because it is actually the bit I feel I’m best at and certainly is the stuff that comes out when I get excited with a sudden NEED to write immediately. So… even though I suspect it makes my fic slooow and the plot languishes in the background…

A thing I love doing and I think I’m getting better at is exploration of the thoughts and feelings of a character in a specific moment/scene. Usually through an inner monologue, sometimes interspersed with dialogue, but I just love picking apart a character’s mind spiral to show where they are mentally on a matter, where they came from and maybe edging them towards some progress. Scott and Virgil are the usual victims of this but I often do it to an OC as well, with the intent of showing one of the main characters’ development through external eyes.

Again, it doesn’t make for exciting, action-filled fic and I sometimes feel guilty for posting 3 chapters covering about 10 mins of events but… actually I enjoy reading that kind of thing from other people so clearly I believe it’s legit story telling when they do it so I’m trying to give myself permission to believe it is when the writer is me :)

Thanks for the ask and the encouragement (which, coming from one of my fave writers, is extra encouraging!)