#she won't question what he does (she will however snoop around his office)

[noxianwilled]

katarina being a skittish feral cat when swain 'adopted' her tho

[rikasfundingassociates]

[New Recording] The Assistant

This interview originally took place on April 14th, 2023.

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The office you see now is pristine in appearance and illuminated solely by the large floor to ceiling windows. In front of them sits a desk, sleek in design and painted a deep black. A top it sits a computer, several boxes of files labelled "finances", and a clock that makes a tick noise each second. Jazz softly reverberates from the computer just enough to send this drab and grey office into a space slightly more inviting. What does quickly catch your eye, however, is the man that sits at it. With a sigh he silently rises from his seat and takes a stand at the edge of the desk. He fidgets for a moment, as to adjust himself properly for the meeting, then tugs at the hem of his gloves. Finally, with a clearing of his throat, he speaks.

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[ASSISTANT]: "Valentin Purishkevich with Marium Corporations, how may I assist you today?"

So, uh. what does your company do exactly?

VALENTIN: "Ah, Marium Corp. is mostly known for it's wine manufacturing. Admittedly, I don't know much about wine myself but we are head of our competitors as of current." He says with a small nod of approval.

I NEED HIM TO STAB ME

He visibly pauses with a shake of the head. "Excuse me?"

What exactly do you do?

Taking a moment to recover from the prior statement, he clears his throat.

"Yes- well, personally I'm the assistant to [HEIR] who is the currently next line to inherit the corporation from her mother. As of right now I primarily handle their finances."

where'd you get your gloves

"Calvin Klein."

I don't think I've heard of [HEIR]? Who is she?

"My... boss?" He seems confused by the question slightly, as if it was obvious. "And friend, I suppose. But no worries, you'll be meeting her next. You'll have more than enough time to get acquainted."

if you were to be forced to donate to a charity what amount of money would you give

"I wouldn't need to be forced-" In fact, he seems appalled by such an assumption. "I work with one, after all."

Are the current allegations of your company attempting to host a Digital World Wide Murder Party with actual Murder true?

"...?" He looks so confused. "We haven't hosted anything in several years, nor would we ever host something so heinous."

You like Jazz? I hear Jazz playing.

"Yes." He smiles a little bit. :)

what’s your favourite murder method from a book/series/movie you’ve seen?

"???" Blink Blink "What is with you people and you fascination with something so vile- Perhaps I should recommend you all to my sister, she's a therapist."

most important question of all: milk before cereal or cereal before milk

"I don't eat cereal." He says, expression flat. "However anyone who pours in their milk before their cereal has probably committed several offenses."

Does your sister work for this company?

"No, she's back home in Russia. She has her own Foundation to be running."

How come the charity hasn’t hosted things in years?

"...Admittedly, the reason is a bit personal. While I know the reasoning, I was only hired after the incident that resulted in the RFA's hiatus."

"I won't go into detail on the matter for the sake of my coworkers, I hope you can respect that."

It’s ok, I was just curious! I’m glad the rfa is back to hosting charity events. What does the money go to?

"We're not... quite back to hosting yet. But we aim to be able to in the near future."

"The money raised from the parties in the past would be distributed to other charities, we don't exactly have one specific charity we donated to regularly. At least, not what I saw from the records..."

do you have access to ALL the records? or are some of ‘em forbidden for you?

"Anything that doesn't apply to my job, I have access to. Marium Corp has in no way attempted to hide any information that I may have needed or wanted, nor have I snooped around where I shouldn't have been."

Do you like working at marium corp?

He shrugs. "I wouldn't work here if I didn't. I can easily find employment elsewhere."

Do you have any advice for people who want to help plan the next rfa event?

He pauses for a moment as if thinking about something. "I... We don't have applications for the RFA open at this time, I'm sorry. But... to answer your question, what I would tell hypothetical new hires is that it's ideal to be cooperative. We don't need dead weight."

Is there anyone in the rfa you don’t get along with?

"... [HACKER] and I do not see eye to eye very often. She is vastly different than I in priorities and interest. Of course, this doesn't stop me from getting my job done."

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VALENTIN: [With a sigh, he readjusts his gloves as he did before. With one last glance at you he nods his head, body filled with the rigid professionalism.]

"Well, then. I'll be taking my leave. I hope you all have a good evening."

[With that, he departs and everything goes black.]

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Recording and audio provided by [UNKNOWN.] rika's funding association (or the "rfa" for short) is a private, non-profit organization whose primary objective is to make the world a safer and kinder place for everyone. are you getting them? did you finally get them?