#she told me to be eaiser on myself and that using sex to cope instead of harming myself isnt wrong
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#i had a rough therp sesh today#it wasnt bad she didnt do anything wrong we just had to touch a bunch of big inner wounds#she told me to be eaiser on myself and that using sex to cope instead of harming myself isnt wrong#also i need to get a tattoo of 'i may not understand it yet but it is not my fault'#......every fiber of my body is telling me its wrong to talk about what i think could be cptsd#but everything logical and outer person wise says talking about it is the only way to heal#highgoblin#also theres this outdoor cat that REALLY loves me and i try to enjoy the company#but#he literally cries for hours after i go inside#he tried to come in just 10 munutes ago but my dog scared him awau#fuck hes so cute and talkative but my dog is jealous and my enviorment is trash#ugh :(#my dad says we're gonna clean this weekend and try to see about the cat if hes still around#i just have no hope for things changing and its reallu hard to break out of that mindset cus im tired of being hurt
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