#she literally wrote me: 'If I don't see you later have a good day...actually have a good day regardless of whether or not I see you'

[cinematicnomad]

it's like a decade+ later but i really am convinced that my queer lit professor had a crush on me in undergrad and really, fuck me for not realizing i was bi earlier bc i would have pounced on that.

[23starii]

Pleasant Surprise - tendo x reader

Summary: He's used to girls trying to get through him to get to Ushiwaka. He knows no girl actually wants to be with him or get to know him. None of the gifts he receives are ever actually for him. Until you approach him one day after practice.

Warnings/notes: insecurity, speculation, rudeness, but, tbh not that much, short reader (shorter than Tendo). Chat I literally wrote all of day two and left to find a divider AND TURNS OUT EVERYTHING DELETED SO I HAD TO REWRITE THE WHOLE THING 😆😆😆😆😆

Day one

Practice was finally over.

Tendo loved it. It was another good day for him and the team.

What he didn't quite loves was-

"E-excuse me?" A tiny feminine voice to his left.

"Can I help you?" He answered, almost rudely. He knew what was to come, especially with the way you held the small, neatly wrapped gift box in between your hands.

"I'm really sorry to bother you, Tendo.." You began, shyly looking up at the taller male.

Tendo almost rolled his eyes. He wanted to just tell you to go away. He couldn't take it anymore. He just wanted to go home, but here you were, a cute girl saying his name with the sweetest voice trying to use him to get to his buddy.

It would be nice not to be looked over for once. Not only was it annoying to have to go through this nearly every day but painful, too. You were so cute and pretty. He recalled seeing you around and watching their practice several times.

"I made this for you. I was wondering if you'd accept it?" The girl brought her arms up higher, showing off the tiny box to the volleyball player.

"Listen-" Tendo almost answered in his usual way, telling girls to just go away because Ushiwaka didn't want their gifts anyway but then he realized what you said.

A gift for him? This was new. You wanted to earn his trust and get close to him just so he could introduce you to Ushiwaka. Didn't you?

Figures.

"U-um, you don't have to.. if you don't want to." You spoke up after Tendo was quiet for some time, thinking.

"Is it for me?" He wondered.

"Yes! It's for you! I made this just for you, Tendo."

Before he could say anything, you decided to keep speaking your mind, making sure he understood the extent of your purpose for being in front of him today.

"I've been coming to watch you practice for some time now.. you're amazing. You're so tall and a great blocker! I can tell you enjoy playing the game very much.. you always have a smile on your face when you play. And I enjoy watching you..very much as well."

Tendo was stunned, to say the least. You spoke without even looking at him. What you said didn't sound rehearsed or bogusly put together.

He wasn't sure what to say or do. He didn't know if he was convinced either.

"I took the time to learn that you really like chocolate too.. so that's why I made it for you. It took me a while to get the recipe right, but I did it just for you.. so I would really appreciate it if you could accept my hard work." You stared at the floor, face flushed and embarrassed, arms stretched out. You couldn't believe you poured nearly your whole heart out to him when he hadn't even said more than one word to you.

"Um.. okay. Thank you very much. I'll make sure to have these later." Tendo took the small box from your pretty hands. He had never been in a situation like this before - he hoped his answer wasn't too blunt or that he made you feel dumb for being here.

"Please! Let me know if you like them! Or if you dont.. I'd be very happy to make more for you!" You bowed quickly before speeding off in the opposite direction, cheeks burning.

You really hopped you hadn't said too much.

Tendo watched you walk away, cocking his head slightly to the his right, puzzled.

Could it be that you really did make it for him because you wanted to give it to him?

Could it be true that you really had been watching him and not Ushiwaka?

"Damn. That girl was really nervous." He hears Semi from his left speak.

"Aw man! You're so lucky, Tendo! She was cute.." Goshiki gushes from his right.

"Yeah, she was.."

Day two

The next day, Tendo walked the halls with the knowledge that somewhere in the same building, there was a girl who made the best chocolates he's ever had.

He hardly thought of anything else since he popped one of the treats into his mouth the night prior. He couldn't believe something so delicious could be made. And just for him nonetheless.

He hoped your words were truthful. He hoped he would see you again that afternoon so he could thank you.

Tendo made his way toward the gym, where he would be partaking in the usual practice routine.

When he arrived and was fully changed into his gym clothes, he made sure to warm up with his teammates.

He stretched and received a few balls, making sure to keep an eye out for you.

The redhead made sure to glance over at the students' section every so often.

Tendo was quite disillusioned to find you nowhere to be seen.

An hour into practice, he figured you just weren't coming. He had been tricked, hadn't he.

Oh well.

There's no way a girl like you would seriously be into him.

He decided to go on as if nothing had happened, as per usual. He continued giving it his all during practice as was expected from him.

.

.

.

Tendo exited the changing room, having his regular school uniform on now. He could hear his younger teammates messing about in the room behind him while he bent down low, grabbing his shows and placing them in front of himself.

"Tendo." He hears the firm, stoic voice of his best buddy call out.

"Hey! Wakaaa!" The lankier boy teased with the nickname, looking off in Ushijima's direction whilst putting his left shoe on.

"There was a girl looking for you." The barely taller male spoke.

"A girl?" Tendo repeated, moving on to his right shoe.

"I thought she was gonna ask me for my autograph. Instead, she asked me about you." Ushiwaka informed, with his usual straight face.

Tendo straightened up his body, finishing up with his shoes he turned his full attention to his friend.

"Where is she?" The redhead asked, picturing your shaky figure holding out the gift he enjoyed so much.

Ushiwaka shrugged.

"She was outside the gym, last time I saw her."

Tendo thanked his friend and quickly made his way back to the gym, hoping he hadn't missed you.

He was relieved to find you curiously standing about right outside the gym.

"Excuse me?" He spoke, stepping to you.

You quickly turn around to meet the boy, your hair whipping the air from the speed.

"Tendo!" You spoke, surprised.

"I'm shocked, I didn't think I'd see you again or have the chance to thank you for those chocolates." Tendo teased, reffering to your absence earlier.

He watched your face twist into guilt.

"I am only able to see you when my club activities end early. I'm so sorry! Did you like the gift then..?" You ramble, apologetically, your cheeks flushing.

Tendo suddenly found it increasingly difficult to hide how flattered he is by your presence.

You took the time to come see him after your own club activities and even asked Ushiwaka about him. And the way you messed with your uniform nervously as you spoke was adorable in his eyes.

"Like it? I loved it!! I've never had anything so good before." His face warmed up.

"Really?? It was a family recipe.. I barely learned it, so I'm glad you enjoyed them!" You gave another sweet smile, almost as sweet as the treats the boy had last night.

"You'll have to teach me that recipe some time, cause seriously, I've never had anything like that before!" He gushed, hoping he didn't sound too enthusiastic.

You blush at his compliments.

"So.. do you enjoy making sweets too, Tendo?" You wonder, hoping the two of you might find something in common, it would be beneficial to keep the conversation going which you hoped would happen.

"Actually, I've never baked or anything like that. But, if it's possible to make something that good, I'd like to learn it."

You were happy that he took such interest in you. You honestly hadn't expected it. You were just some girl after all. It warmed your heart and the tips of your ears.

"By the way, you were looking for me? Ushiwaka told me."

Again, your cheeks flushed and you stiffened up.

"Well, I wanted to see you! I am a fan of yours, you know!" You laughed awkwardly admitting you truly did just want to see him.

Tendo's cheeks warmed further equal to yours now.

You wanted to see him? His fan? A pretty girl?

Could words be ever more flattering? Could you make him any more embarrassed? He seriously couldn't believe it.

You really called yourself his fan.

"Oh, wow. I didn't know I had such a beautiful fan." He sputtered, relieved that he hadn't stuttered. He almost missed your expression after those words.

Your face dropped, and he could see the visible pink hue that coated your pretty cheeks.

"I-Well, you know, I mean.. you're awesome and like also super! And beautiful.. too.." Your eyes widened from your own words. How could one stumble over themselves so damn much?

You internally beat the shit out of yourself. There's no way you didn't totally just blow it.

You almost missed how his eyes widened, too, and he blushed. Tendo looked as if you could eat him right up right then and there.

"Jeez.. you really came here just to flatter me." Tendo couldn't ignore the fact that no one had ever called him beautiful before. You were the first. And damn, it was a really nice feeling.

He couldn't believe it. This had to be a dream.

You couldn't really reply after how badly you stuttered you were surely traumatized from the embarrassment.

"So, how about that recipe?"

The boy eased your nerves by not turning away or insinuating that he disliked you. He wouldn't anyway. No way in a million years would he walk away.

You smiled, taking a deep breath to calm yourself before continuing the conversation.

You gave him a social media account of your choosing so he could contact you.

Tendo asked about your club, and the two of you spoke of your many interests. He even walked with you to your bus stop.

You found that the two of you didn't have much in common, but his interest in your hobby of baking and making sweets just might change that.

It might even create a duo of married chocolatiers.

✧˖*°࿐

[l1tw1ck]

Picking Up a Stray

bottom!ftm Miguel x top!male reader

🕷️ Word Count: 863 🕷️

[Part Two] | AFAB Language Used

i just woke up from a very very very long sleep and wrote this within an hour, i proofread it but there's probably a few mistakes 😭

CW: Non-Con to Con, Vibrator, Public Sex, Squirting, Virginity Loss, Blood, Creampie, miguel has a rape kink

Miguel’s doing errands with a vibrator lodged in his cunt and he's trying so hard to pretend like it doesn't feel good. Like he doesn't want to fall to the floor and let it do its thing, make him come and moan like the slut he is. He takes a shortcut to the last store on his list, determined to get this done. Lyla warns him that he won't make it but he doesn't listen. He turns the wrong way despite Lyla giving him directions, he’s distracted by the rapid buzzing in his pussy and mindlessly walks into a dead end. Nobody seems to come this way. He could rest here for a moment and no one would see him. Lyla tells him not to, she has the directions for the closest bathroom and urges him to hold out a bit longer. He can't. He falls to the ground along with his bags and gives in to the vibrator, even stroking his erect t-dick through his pants to expedite the process. He had no reason to though, as he squirts only moments later.

Lyla tells him he's no longer alone and his eyes shoot towards the exit. Fuck. He’s screwed (literally). You walk towards him and look down at him. "Today must be my lucky day." You whistle, grabbing his shirt and lifting him up. Miguel considers himself a pretty heavy guy, the fact that you can pick him up is terrifying.

"Leave me alone." He growls. He can’t feel Lyla anymore. He doesn't know what happened to her but he’s all alone now.

"Don’t act like you don't want this, kitty." You pull down his pants and then his panties, his slick is hesitant to part with the fabric, sticking to it almost like a spider web.

"I don't!" He yells. He tries to move around and fight you but to no avail. You’re determined to fuck him. You shove your fingers inside him, making him moan, and pull out the vibrator. You bring it to your face, taking in the smell before licking up all the slick it's collected. You drop it on the ground and free your hard cock with just one hand.

Miguel's breath hitches when he sees your length. It’s thick, veiny, and long. Screw what he said before. He wants this. He’s always had a fantasy like this, where he gets raped by some rando with a big dick. He never thought he'd actually want it. But maybe part of him did, maybe that's why he decided to use a vibrator today. He wanted the thrill, the possibility of getting caught and having to take responsibility for it.

Despite this revelation, he continues to act like he doesn't want it. He pretends to be angry as you push him against the wall and lift him into the air, his legs held up by your strong hands. He looks down and watches you rub your cock along his messy pussy, your precum drips down onto his womb, making him twitch.

"please.." He whimpers. "Please don't." He continues his facade, getting insanely turned on when he sees your reaction.

"Oh, kitty, even if you cry, I won't let you go. It’ll only make me want you more." You bring your tip to his entrance. He gulps. He's going to lose his virginity to a stranger in an alleyway. Why does he love that so much? You shove your length into him, making him throw his head back. He bites his lip, holding back his moans. You let out a curse. "You’re tight. So, so fucking tight.." You dig your nails into his flesh and start pounding into him. Miguel covers his mouth with his hands, tears starting to fall thanks to the pain of losing his virginity. He knows he's bleeding and he loves it. He's unbelievably horny right now.

You look down at where the two of you meet and notice a coat of cum and blood on your shaft. "This is your first time?" You ask, voice shaky. He nods, sniffling. "Shit." You fuck him even rougher, excited to be the one who took his virginity. Miguel can't help but come, squirting hard. "You like this, don't you?" You smirk, licking your lips. "It's okay, kitty, be honest." You pry his hands away.

Miguel whimpers. "I lo- love it~" He moans.

You chuckle. "Of course you do." You bring him into a kiss and despite his inexperience he happily reciprocates it. He feels your thrusts losing their rhythm, does that mean…? His pussy convulses around your length, excited to be filled up with your cum. The feeling of that quickly brings you to your orgasm.

You pull away from the kiss and look at his blissed out expression. "I don't typically take in strays but I'll make an exception for you." You pull out of him and put his clothes back on, forcing him to walk around with your cum inside him. Not that he doesn't want that. He looks at you as you grab his hand, he’s barely aware of what's happening. He lets you take him to your home, leaving his bags in the alleyway.

[etherealising]

chapter one | a berzatto family christmas

masterlist | next chapter ↣

pairing(s): carmen berzatto x fem!reader : platonic!michael berzatto x fem!reader : platonic!richie jerimovich x fem!reader

summary: you reunite with carmy years later at the berzatto family christmas party.

warnings: language (cursing), blasphemy, angst (maybe?), spoilers kinda (if you haven't seen season 2 don't read), the berzatto family, not dialogue heavy, very subtle hints to mikey being suicidal, probably ooc!characters, idk what else but if you find something let me know please! not beta’d and minimal editing so sorry for any mistakes. i also wrote this overstimulated on caffeine so if it doesn’t make sense or it’s repetitive then we know why : )

semantics: no use of Y/N: reader goes by the nickname Baby it has a backstory and its literally so simple, if this bothers you idk what to tell you, sorry : (

wc: 4.7k

You were standing on the sidewalk, nerves filling your body as you hyped yourself up to take the few steps left to the porch and ring the doorbell. You shouldn’t have been so nervous, you knew that but your mind was spinning with the myriad of scenarios both good and bad; that could play out once you stepped foot past the threshold. In all honesty, it wasn’t so much that you were nervous to enter the house itself, it was the fact that you’d be face to face with your childhood best friend for the first time in you didn’t even know how long. Maybe childhood best friend was a stretch you had only been introduced into each other's lives due to circumstance, and because of that forced proximity, you both took comfort in having someone stable around.

The two of you weren’t friends because you had chosen each other, or because you had met in kindergarten and shared toys in the sandbox because the other kids were stingy. No, you met because as a single mom, your mother needed all the shifts she could get even if that meant working the graveyard shift at the hospital, and only seeing you a handful of hours throughout the day because most times she was too dead on her feet to be conscious for more than a few hours. And when she could no longer pay the babysitter her next best option was the eccentric woman across the street who had children close in age with you.

Enter Donna Berzatto, a woman who came to feel like a second mom to you. It's not that she replaced your mom, no one could ever replace her, but she was the only real mother figure you knew for a time in your life. Who took you in as her own when your mother needed a new babysitter, and not just you but integrated your mom into the family as well, when she was spared the time off from nursing. Donna Berzatto who never sent you home empty-handed, and always made enough food for you and your mom to last throughout the week, just so your mother wouldn’t have to worry about fitting grocery shopping into her already hectic schedule. Donna Berzatto who, even when you were old enough to no longer need a babysitter, would send Carmy across the street to fetch you for family dinner, or even just invite you over because she thought you needed company.

Now that you were thinking about it, it seemed like you were more friends with his mom than you ever were with Carmen Berzatto. But then that would be a lie wouldn’t it?

You and Carmen Berzatto were friends due to circumstance, maybe even best friends. You weren’t just friends at his house, but you were school friends, you were everywhere friends. He really was your only true friend, of course, you had school friends, but that’s just what they were. You saw them Monday through Friday for a mandatory education, never an hour before school started or a minute after the final bell. Which didn’t necessarily bother you, but sometimes you longed for a weekend invitation to hang out, not that it ever came. And it wasn’t like you were shunned or unpopular in school, you were just average, you didn’t see a point in making friends with people you weren’t actually interested in befriending.

That’s what made Carmy so different, yes maybe you were only introduced due to circumstances but that didn’t stop the two of you from latching onto each other for dear life. Your mom always wondered how you two even established the friendship you did, with both of you being shy and never feeling the need to go out of your way to make friends. Include the fact that you had been neighbors practically your whole lives and never once taken an interest in each other aside from shy waves and curious childlike staring when either of you would be outside.

Your relationship with Carmen progressed as any childlike relationship would, you befriended each other, had your incessant petty arguments and fights, nothing ever serious enough to actually cause damage just childish antics. And it continued to progress through middle school and high school, the two of you were each other’s person, you just understood each other, the two of you let the other understand you, and wanted to be understood by each other.

You could also recall what you explain as a minute change in your friendship. As Senior year approached and you and Carmy continued to grow into yourselves, you developed a slight crush on the boy you had grown up with. It obviously wasn’t as small as you thought it was if you were standing in front of his childhood home giving yourself a pep talk just to ring the damn doorbell though was it?

The unsolicited card and wrapped present weighed heavy in your tote bag, as your breath was made visible by the chilly Chicago weather.

It was Christmas and for all intents and purposes you had been planning on mailing the present to Carmen’s New York address, but after visiting The Beef on your way back into town Mikey and Richie had let it slip that indeed the infamous Berzatto sibling would be gracing everyone with his presence this holiday season.

It was moments like these you wished you had picked up on the Berzatto family’s horrible smoking habit, thankfully your mom had taught you just how vital having functioning lungs was.

Your head shot up as the sound of loud rambunctious voices drew your attention to the front door opening and closing revealing a face you were all too familiar with and actually relieved to see. The oldest Berzatto brother stood on the porch, hands on his hips as he gave you a goofy smile. You could feel your lips stretching into a smile of your own, the infectious aura that Michael Berzatto exuded doing wonders to calm your racing mind.

“I know you didn’t come all this way just to stand outside staring at my family home like a fucking weirdo Baby.” Mikey’s smile grew in size as he teased you.

You rolled your eyes at the childhood nickname you wish hadn’t stuck as Mikey opened his arms to wrap you in one of his signature hugs. The two of you stood on the porch embracing each other for what felt like hours, you needed this hug as much as he needed it, you knew it and Mikey did too. That was the thing about you and Mikey although not blood-related it was as if your souls knew each other in a past life. Of the Berzatto siblings, Mikey was the last sibling you developed a relationship with. Growing up he was always just Carmy’s older brother but as you grew up surrounded by him, he became your surrogate older brother as well. And when Carmy dashed off to pursue his culinary dreams in New York, you and Mikey grew even closer.

You stepped back from the embrace, your eyes finding Mikey’s as he looked at you with a knowing glint in his eyes. “You not standing out here cause of a certain Chef in that house are ya?” Mikey asked, smirking down at you.

You chuckled “The only reason I come around anymore is for Mama Donna.” You joked doing a poor job to convince Mikey.

He nodded, tossing his head back with a laugh, “You were always a shit liar Baby. Carmy’s an idiot, don't let him ruin your Christmas.”

You let out a sigh head resting against Mikey’s chest as you tried to let his words soothe you even more, “He’s not ruining it, you just know things have been kind of stilted between us, and I don’t know this whole situation just feels awkward.”

You raised your head to look at Mikey again, “It’s awkward right? Am I making things awkward? I don’t wanna ruin Christmas Mikey, I know how your mom is and I know how Carmy is, I don’t wanna ambush him.”

The worry in your voice was evident as Mikey stood there listening to your ranting. His hand reached out as he used his thumb to massage away the frown between your eyebrows. “Calm down Baby, you know Ma is expecting you, and she wouldn’t take it well if you missed Christmas. She looks forward to seeing you every year, you give her a piece of Carmy when he can’t be fucking asked to come home and visit.” His hand moved down to cup the side of your neck rubbing soothing circles where his thumb rested, “Do it for Ma okay? Let Carmy be fucking wonder boy Carmy a’ight.”

You laughed nodding your head as best as you could with Mikey’s hand holding it, he smiled giving you one last hug before dropping his hand to grab your wrist and tug you into the house. You stopped him by placing a hand on his arm that was connected to yours.

“Hold on Mikey, I got you something.” You moved to start rummaging through your tote bag stalling because you were too nervous for his reaction to the present.

“Awe you didn’t have to get me nothing.” You turned back to him with the present in your hands as he held his own hands over his heart mockingly. You knew Mikey didn’t do well when it came to sentimental things and the best you would get out of him was a joke as opposed to anything else.

You laughed holding the rectangular wrapped present out to him, “I wanted to Mikey, don’t think of this as a gift, think of it uhh…as a show of appreciation yeah?” You nodded feeling your face heat up as you dropped your head so he couldn’t see how unsure you were about the gift.

He smiled, finding your shyness endearing before tearing into the neatly wrapped paper and revealing a frame, his hands engulfing it from end to end. He smiled looking at it before you saw confusion etch across his face, “This is great Baby, yeah but uh what the fuck am I looking at?”

You shove his shoulder before laughing at him and grabbing the frame out of his hands but holding it in front of your chest so he could still see its contents, “It's a trademark certification you dumbass, can’t you fucking read Mikey.” You joked to try and underestimate how big of a gift this was.

Mikey’s brows furrowed before he snatched the frame out of your hands to get a better look at the certificate sitting behind the glass, eyes snapping back up to your face with a look you couldn’t read. You shuffled your feet feeling like you overstepped a boundary you didn’t even know was between you and Mikey, “Don’t worry though I-I, put it in your name, it’s not like I trademarked it for myself or anything. I just know how much this means to you and I, I know shit has been tough lately and I’m sorry if you feel like I stepped on your toes but…Mikey, you deserve good things too okay?” You hadn’t meant to go on a rant, but you could feel the apprehension leaving you as you became passionate in every word you spoke.

“You deserve to be fucking happy Mikey, and I, I want you to know I fucking believe in you and I’m always in your corner. If it's-” You were cut off by Mikey clearing his throat, causing your eyes to snap back up to his, all the emotions he didn’t know how to translate into words swirling in his brown eyes, a small smile resting on his lips.

“Mikey-,” Before you could get another word out you were once again trapped in his comforting embrace, this hug conveying something completely different from the earlier one you shared. Mikey’s head tucked into your neck as you felt his uneasy breathing through your hands clutched around him. Mikey wasn’t the type to get emotional in front of other people, and feeling a tear of his smear against your cheek as he raised his head from your neck and settled his bearded cheek against yours, you weren’t sure if you had done the right thing by giving him the gift or not.

The two of you stood in silence as you allowed Mikey his moment, not wanting to make him feel insecure about you being present while he was being emotional. When he finally pulled away you could see the leftover sheen in his eyes. He tucked the framed certificate under his arm as both his hands reached up to grab your face in both of his hands, eyes finding yours, a whispered “thank you, baby,” leaving his lips as he placed a kiss on your forehead before he grabbed the frame again and wrapped you in another hug.

His head rested atop yours as your face rested against his chest, ear pressed against his beating heart. You lied, you thought the last hug was different, but no it was this hug that was different, while the second hug you shared in the span of 20 minutes was a hug of love and gratitude. This hug felt heavier, like there were things Mikey wanted to tell you but couldn’t, things he only felt he could convey through a hug, things you weren’t sure if you wanted to question or not.

It had been almost 20 minutes since Michael had escaped the house to do whatever the fuck it was he was doing outside. Carmy didn’t know and in all honesty he didn’t actually give a shit either, too busy helping Donna out in the kitchen to try to give any thoughts to whatever had grabbed Mikey’s attention.

He was focused in the corner of the kitchen making Tiff Sprite to help alleviate her nausea symptoms. Anyone else would have done their best to block out the rambunctious noises going on throughout the house, not Carmy though, the chaos fueled him, it grounded him. If the house was quiet it would have been too much for him, to be alone with his own thoughts ping-ponging around in his head, waiting for a chance to drown him. So if he had to listen to his mom list a plethora of things he needed to make sure happened for Christmas dinner to go off without a hitch while he was making Sprite from scratch, he welcomed it.

He finished his concoction just in time for Richie to walk through the kitchen, the older man trying to figure out how the fuck it was even possible to make Sprite from scratch. Gratefully taking the glass Carmy had offered to him, marveling at the carbonated drink in his hand.

Carmy nodded in his direction, “Yo Cousin, where the fuck is Mikey. He just fucking disappeared.” Carmy’s head swiveled around the kitchen double checking whether his brother was there or not, coming up empty in his search. Richie glanced up before settling his eyes back on the drink in his hand still doing the mental math to wrap his head around what the fuck Carmy just made.

Richie jutted his head in the direction of the front door, “Outside talking to Baby.” His eyes finally focused on Carmy’s in time to see the frown grace the younger man’s face, his eyebrows pinching together in agitation, annoyed that his brother was on a phone call rather than inside. Though that’s what Carmy told himself subconsciously he knew he was just annoyed at the fact that Mikey was even talking to you at all. Carmy didn’t think he was possessive but as you and Mikey grew closer through the years, he couldn’t help but feel miffed about the ever growing friendship between the two of you. You and your friendship with Carmy was the first thing in his life that he felt like was actually his and his alone.

It’s funny really for Carmy to think he has any sort of claim over you, or like the two of you were even really friends anymore. When he left Chicago to pursue his culinary dreams, he left you behind to, essentially ghosting the one real friend he did have. It’s not like he meant to, you two just went your separate ways after graduation, and he wasn’t even sure if there even was an “Us” when it came to the two of you anymore. If that was the case the only person he had to blame was himself, it was no fault of yours that your friendship had hit a plateau, Carmy hadn’t responded to a text of yours in years, and the fact that you still texted him to this day caused a slight pain in his chest as he stood in the middle of his mother’s kitchen, frown still etched into his features.

“He’s outside on the phone with Baby?” Carmy questioned the ache in his chest doing nothing to alleviate his irritation. It was Richie’s turn to frown reciprocating the same confused look Camry wore.

“What - No dickhead, he’s talking to Baby, like she’s right in fucking front of him and shit.” Richie swatted the side of Carmy’s head like a child. “Your moms invites her to every holiday, Cousin, and she comes every time.” Richie knew the last bit wasn’t necessary but felt Carmy rightfully deserved it, all anyone wanted from the youngest Berzatto was a visit.

“Dudes been out there for fucking ever though, those to idiots just standing outside like a bunch of fucking jackoffs.” Richie left the kitchen not waiting for Carmy to follow him before heading to the front door. He stopped moving the curtain on one of the side windows to spot two of the people he considered family. He let out a low whistle nudging Carmy’s shoulder who had finally joined his side nodding his head to the window.

“Get a load of these fucking losers hugging on the porch like they’re in some fucking Hallmark movie or some shit.” Richie laughed pointing at you and Mikey through the window. Carmy leaned closer to get a peak at what Richie was going on about.

Carmy hated to admit it, but Richie was right, the too of you looked like the happy couple who just saved a small town’s Christmas or whatever the fuck Hallmark movies were about. Mikey had finally separated himself from you long enough for Carmy to take in your features. He’d be lying if he said the years apart made him forget what you looked like. You were still the same girl he left in Chicago all those years ago except the wand of maturity had touched you, and in his opinion he thought you looked more beautiful than you had in high school.

Carmy was never one to pay too much attention to a woman’s features, and not because he didn’t care, it's just that he didn’t think it mattered. But as he drank in your form he learned in that exact moment why a woman might want people to notice the small things. Like the haircut you were sporting that Carmy felt shaped your face well, not that he knew shit about stuff like that, but he could appreciate art when he saw it. The outfit you picked out doing wonders to compliment your tall form and accentuate your legs. Carmy could look at you all day, scratch that he wanted to look at you all day.

He was torn from his reverie as Richie narrated the scene happening in front of them, “Aw look at these fuckers lookin all in love an shit.” He joked watching as Mikey slung his arm around you and led you towards the door, what looked to be a frame held in his other hand. The two of you walked side by side, your arm wrapped around his torso, hugging him into your side, Mikey’s head leaning slightly down to whisper something in your ear a small smile gracing your face as Mikey pressed his lips onto your temple lingering there for what Carmen swore was forever.

The tightness in his chest intensified tenfold as the realization of just how close you and Mikey had become sank into him. He didn’t know how to feel, his brain not even allowing any emotions to process, saving himself from any conclusions he might come to from a split second interaction.

Carmy left, he chose his path, he knew this, and he had no regrets he would pursue his dream every time the opportunity was presented. He just wished that, maybe if he held onto you as tightly as you still held onto him, it would’ve been him greeting you on the sidewalk on Christmas Day, being the sole object of your attention holding you close to his longing body. He knew overall the decisions he made regarding you were wrong, while he ignored your daily text and calls enough times for you to just resort to monthly check ins asking him about his endeavors and congratulations as you heard about his achievements in the culinary industry, he knew deep down that Mikey answered every text and call you sent his way, made it his mission to connect with you anytime you were back in Chicago.

Carmy couldn’t admit it to himself but deep down he knew his family saw spending time with you as a way to stay connected to him. You were the closest thing any of them still had to Carmy, and even though he had essentially cut you off from his life, his family loved you too much to allow Carmy’s shortcomings to affect their relationship with you.

He was broken from the recesses of his mind as Richie threw the door open stepping over the threshold raising his hands in the air to welcome you and Mikey into the house. The glass of Sprite still clutched in his left hand, a broad smile spread across his face as you left Mikey’s hold to greet Richie eyes not having spotted Carmy who was hidden behind Richie’s small frame.

Carmy’s first up close look at you in years were your hands wrapped around Richie’s torso as he pulled you into a hug, rocking the two of you back and forth, Richie let you go quickly turning his body back into the house “A’ight fuckers you can all stop pretending you care so much about Carmy and his little rat in the chef hat bullshit. We got the real deal here now, Baby's gracing us with her journalist presence.”

Carmy’s brows furrowed at Richie’s dig only slightly offended about being compared to a fictional character named after pasta, too caught up in allowing the sound of your laugh to grace his ears for the first time in what felt like forever. Mikey had finally caught up to you standing behind you with a hand placed on your shoulder, Carmy watched as his brother’s hand glided up and down your arm before giving your bicep a slight squeeze and nodding his head in Carmy’s direction.

If Carmy was being honest it was becoming increasingly difficult to quiet his mind that was eagerly trying to piece everything together. From yours and Mikey's prolonged moment on the porch, to the kiss he placed on your temple, add in Richie’s jokes and the almost constant physical contact between you and Mikey and Carmy was sure he figured shit out.

You looked to where Mikey motioned his head finally noticing Carmy’s figure standing there while Richie ran off towards the stairs after his impromptu introduction. Looking at Carmy was like being in a Time Machine, nothing had drastically changed, he looked more exhausted than what you remembered. But overall he was the same Carmy you parted ways with all those years ago.

A small smile graced your lips as you took him in, he was still your Carmy appearance wise, and right now for you that was all that mattered. You lifted your hand in a small wave gaining his attention, your smile growing wider as your eyes locked with his.

The clearing of a throat broke you from your thoughts, Mikey’s hand giving your shoulder a squeeze as he walked you two into the house before shutting the door behind him. As he finished he stood in front of you so that Carmy was partially covered from view by each brother in your line of vision though your focus was taken up by the eldest. He gave you a reassuring smile before gently knocking his fist against your chin and presumably turning to leave you and Carmy alone.

As Mikey walked past Carmy he gave him his signature grin and a wink before patting his shoulder as left to check on Donna in the kitchen and mingle with the other guests.

Carmy’s face was still set in the same frown it had been in when he first asked Richie where Mikey ran off to. You took a deep breath to settle your nerves before taking a step to close the gap between you, your hand reached out to gently squeeze Carmy’s arm though stopping in midair as you watched him subtly flinch. Your smile faltered, your hand finding its rightful place at your side. You looked up to see the apology in Carmy’s eyes, you did your best to brush the moment off, maybe you came on too strong, maybe it wasn’t fair that you were still pushing for a friendship when Carmy had given you all the reasons to stop trying, maybe the Carmy in front of you was a different Carmy to the one you used to know. Maybe the life where it was you and Carmy had finally taken its last breath and you were just too clingy and desperate to realize.

You cleared your throat trying to alleviate the lump forming from the thoughts that were racing through your brain. The small placating smile on your face there to stop you from having a full breakdown in the Berzatto’s foyer. “Its good to see you Carmen, I hope New York is treating you well.” You lips wrapped around the generic greeting forcing yourself not to say anything you might regret.

Carmy nodded his head rapidly accepting your lackluster words, his lips parting and closing all in the same breath. The man obviously had nothing to say to you, and maybe you just had to accept that. You stayed a moment longer cursing yourself for doing so as the air between you two filled with palpable tension.

“Baby, is that you? My goodness you look fucking gorgeous.” Half of Donna’s body had popped out of the kitchen finally gaining a spare moment to greet you. Her words mumbled through the cigarette between her lips, a ladle held in her right hand while the left was occupied by tongs. Her apron covered in all sorts of sauces and whatever the hell else your brain couldn’t even begin to discern.

You laughed half in amusement and half in relief, you weren’t sure how much longer you could stand there as Carmy burned holes in your body. You waved at Donna quickly, beginning to head towards her to join her in the kitchen. It wasn’t your first choice as an escape from Carmen but you’d rather try and help Donna finish preparing Christmas dinner than be around Carmy for another minute.

Donna waved the tongs in Carmy’s direction, “Jesus fucking Christ Carmen, take the girls bag and coat. Don’t just fuckin stand there.” She huffed eyes glaring the longer Carmen stayed glued to the spot. You handed him your tote as soon as his arm shot out and began hastily shimmying out of your jacket. You gave him a soft smile before laying the jacket on his awaiting arm.

You began to leave the foyer as Donna motioned for you to follow her, mentally preparing yourself for what you were about to walk into. A sudden thought occurred causing you to gently grip Carmy’s bicep as you were walking past him, “I uh, I actually bought you a Christmas present. So um, find me later yeah?” You smiled tilting your head slightly in questioning.

Carmen Berzatto graced you with a small smile, nodding back in agreement as you sent him one final nod and turned to enter the kitchen. The first positive emotion he granted you since you walked back into his life 30 minutes ago.

next chapter ↣

a/n: this is my first fic that i’m publishing and i genuinely have no clue what the fuck any of this is, : ) but nonetheless hope you all enjoy! or don’t i’m just a stranger on the internet. constructive criticism would be greatly appreciated though. please like, comment, reblog if this behemoth tickles your fancy!

also i write for fun/hobby and i'm such an inconsistent bitch so don't get your hopes too high, but this will potentially be a series idk yet though lol.

[ms-demeanor]

i really liked OJST in the mid-2010s but i didn’t stop reading cause of the cuck comic - wasn’t there also a comic erika moen wrote about (functionally) harassing lesbians with her now-husband?

In the mid 2010s closet-keys criticized one of Erika Moen's early diary comics and described Erika Moen as "Reassuring a cishet partner that it’s totally okay to use hate speech towards wlw at Pride" and condoning the harassment and fetishization of lesbians because of a 2007 comic that she had made as part of a webcomic she had written about gender and her interactions with her queerness.

The hate speech in question is the partner asking "are you sure you want to hold my hand with all these dykes around?" while they are pretty clearly at a Dyke Day event during pride, and the reassurance that 'it's totally okay to use hate speech toward wlw' is Erika responding "sweetie, I'm proud to be with you."

The comic is still up with a disclaimer that it was written at a different time, and I know that's probably not going to fly with a lot of people but if you were a bi woman in the early to mid 2000s it was pretty common to use statements like "lol yeah i'm into women my boyfriend is fine with it as long as I take pictures" to diffuse the biphobia from straight people AND to say shit like "I'm not a party bi, I actually love pussy, thanks" to diffuse the biphobia from queer people. (if you were a bi guy in the early to mid 2000s i'm sorry and I'm sorry now because we got LUG but that mostly went away and you *still* have to deal with the "gay in waiting" bullshit).

That comic ends with Erika and her partner looking at a woman and saying "I'd totally do her" while the woman thinks "pigs" and if you think that means that they literally sat on the street and vocally commented about lesbians passing by them or that they condone harassing lesbians (in, I cannot stress this enough, a diary comic written by someone in their early twenties who is realizing they are occasionally interested in some men some of the time after identifying as a lesbian their whole life), then I'm gonna go ahead and recommend signing up for some variety or other of literary analysis class. Do we think that Erika is seriously implying that she is going to make her boyfriend gay if she fucks him in this comic from a year later?

If this comic bothers you and you see it as a straight-passing couple giving the go-ahead to harass lesbians, you do you, I'm not saying you have to read the comic or enjoy Erika Moen.

I am saying it's a bit of a stretch, though, and certainly the least charitable explanation possible, and that we should probably give people some space to say awkward things about their sexuality and to make missteps when discussing it in their early twenties and not call them lesbophobic fifteen years after the fact for a college comic.

Moen also gets called transphobic because she has described trans men as adorable/cute in a way that could be read as patronizing in one comic and because she made a comic about wearing a packer for fun and for sexual gratification with her cis male partner as a cis woman.

Appropriately, all of these things feel very "late twenty teens tumblr callout post."

If it bugs you, you don't have to read the comics but I've talked about Moen before and I've gotten the anons in my inbox calling me lesbophobic for recommending her comic when in 2007 she made a comic about catcalling lesbians and condoning street harassment.

Which is frustrating because Erika Moen writes a comic about sex toys that has incredible body and gender diversity and is interested in making sure that people of all sexualities are having safe, enjoyable sex and talking openly about it. This is Rebecca Sugar condones war crimes level discourse over a creator who makes a genuinely good comic and gets dismissed as cringe by people who hate open discussions of sex and gets dismissed as a bigot (in ways that I think are incredibly unfair given the vast majority of her work) among people who *claim* to love open discussions of sex but who *actually* love witch hunts.

[proxablemente]

the way the people who hate what the writers have done to alicent are being called butthurt by other fans is so funny. let's not even talk about what they've done to rhaenyra, i mean the whole point of the show has been trashed this way.

this "feminist" show has repetedly tried to make its female characters the most simpathetic they could, at the cost of butchering these characters and trash their motives, because a complex angry woman CANNOT be liked. oh and while alicent gets an "humbling" arc, blood-thirsty abusive men are getting a REDEMPTION arc! and are never expected to apologize for their crimes (like beheading a child, killing innocents, gr00ming), while alicent has to be humiliated for...being bitter and resentful??

with rhaenyra they're taking the dragon jesus lane, so i guess she might get brutal?? but who knows, they've made her so sensible all season because god forbid she actually wants war😝. women are peaceful! women cannot do war! alicent is no good for regent 'cause WOMAN 'cause EMOTIONAL. rhaenyra is always undermined at the council 'cause WOMAN 'cause REASONABLE.

the only people i'm seeing enjoying this sh1t leaked finale are rhaenicents and indifferents.

i want you to understand that just because rhaenyra and alicent are in the same room it does not mean the writing is good, making alicent oh so stupid! silly alicent keeps humiliating herself, she doesn't know better! is a disgusting character assassination. alicent has become NOTHING: they absolutley could have given her a deeper realization arc, but that was definitively not supposed to happen now nor the AWFUL way they wrote it. they made alicent AN IDIOT. she just knows how to cause herself humiliation, and if you're okay with this as long as rhaenicent happens you clearly don't give a damn about what those sh1t ass writers are doing to my girl.

the writing is BAD. oh SO BAD. it's BAD BAD BAD. please see it!! it's fanfiction level!

and rhaenicent has literally been butchered as well, since the very start of the season! i myself enjoyed rhaenicent prior to season 2, but it just sucks now. they've made alicent a little lost puppy that seeks rhaenyra's approval. last season rhaenicent for them was a memory of better times, when alicent was naive and free of the feeling of fear and remorse that haunts her, and rhaenyra was free of responsabilities and consequences, of the weight of the crown that she will one day wear: it was a pure relationship where they could just be happy with eachother, when none of their lives had been ruined. thinking about it made them nostalgic in s1's later episodes.

now rhaenyra is as stiff as a board with alicent and talks to her coldly, while alicent is mostly listening to her with puppy eyes?? this is what you like???

i am mainly an alicole (and seen the spoilers it looks like it has been butchered too so... bye bye to them too i guess) but even if criston and alicent didn't happen it wouldn't have changed much for me. i have always been interested in ALICENT THE CHARACTER first of all, not her relationship with her children or criston or rhaenyra. what pissed me off about the finale is not what she did to her children, but the fact that it was A STUPID DECISION. THE WRITING AND THE WRITING CHOICES SUCK. THEY SUCK ADMIT IT STOP DEFENDING EVERYTHING THEY CHOOSE TO DO. and it was probably made to be a stupid decision just to make alicent look even more stupid so😂whatever. i'm saying this because a lot of people on twitter are now saying "now they see you alicels as you are, you only care about her because of her relationship with her children :D" MY BROTHER IN CHRIST I DON'T I DON'T GIVE A DAMN ABOUT THEM. plus these are the same people that threw tantrums and unstanned her when the alicole scenes leaked 🙃. THEY are true alicels.

people need to stop consuming material for the sole sake of shipping. if you're in it for that, at least have the decency to care about both the components of the ship separately PLEASE.

man i just hate this season, i needed to get this off my chest.

(i also tried really badly to like everything they've done up until now, so if i'm just exploding now there is a reason)

[cowboybeepboop]

Through the window

“Fuck you”

“Baby thats what youre gonna do”

Pairing: Bradley “Rooster” Bradshaw x fem!reader

Genre: smut

Word count: 2214

Summary: Late night self pleasure turns into more than self pleasure.

Warnings: p in v, mainly porn with some plot, disgusting words for clit cause it got a little awkward at 1 am, use of vibrator, age gap (like three years), major daddy issues, kinda some Voyeurism, roughness from Bradley but with sweetness, praise kink, hair pulling, getting caught.

A/N: Literally just me writing this while sobbing to Shawn Mendes songs, also I wrote most of it while sitting out in front of my school 💪😩💪 I’m a fucking vibe. I don't know if there's like a big fandom on here anymore considering Top Gun Mav has been out for a while now but yk who cares. Also lowkey have been binging Harry Potter and the last of us so maybe I’ll write some of that later. Not proof read like ever

Bradley has been your built-in best friend, being Mavericks daughter means that you spent the majority of your childhood eating dinners with Carole, having Carole brush your hair and tuck you into bed. Carole Bradshaw became your adoptive mom, she taught you to cook, bake, sew, she helped you with your homework and made sure you knew your worth.

Mav was hardly ever around, he put his heart and soul into being a better person so that Goose wouldn’t be disappointed in him, this being said he forgot about the responsibility of actually taking care of his child. But you never blamed him for it, maybe it’s because when he was there with you all he ever wanted to do was cuddle on the couch watching your favorite films. Sometimes he would come home and lay his head on your lap and you would brush and braid his hair.

So, because of your sometimes absentee father, Bradley filled in. He was there with Mav for every milestone, kindergarten graduation, elementary school choir concerts, he even took time from his busy schedule to come to your highschool graduation.

Which makes your sexual attraction to him all the more disgusting, he basically was your stand in father, even though he was only 3 years older than you. But when Maverick finally realized he had a responsibility to spend more time with you, Brad stopped being like a father figure and more like an older friend who you had the hots for.

Bradley hasn’t been home for months-or longer, you totally haven’t been counting, and it totally hasn’t been exactly 8 months 3 weeks and 5 days. He isn’t planning on coming back any time soon, at least if he is he hasn’t told you, which is why you’re stuck pouting with your face between your hands as a few people purchase drinks from the bar.

You work at Penny’s bar, The Hard Deck, which is lowkey awkward considering your dad used to date her. But nonetheless she treats you like her own daughter. The only thing you dislike about working with her is the fact that she scolds you when you flirt while working, it's understandable but makes you want to roll your eyes.

Maverick walks in with a small smile on his face, sitting down at the bar in front of you, “How’s your day Y/N?”.

“It’s pretty good Mav, Penny might want to talk to you though,” winking at him you walk away, heading in the direction of the dart board.

“Hey boys, need a refill?” you smile sweetly, tapping your heel against the wooden floor softly.

“Thank you, baby girl,” Hangman smirks as he hands you the empty bottles, “you know which tab to add it to right?” he nods toward Coyote.

You give a small nod and head back to the bar to grab two more beer bottles, you add the total to Coyote’s tab. He lost in darts, even after covering Jake’s eyes, one more night and you don’t think you’ll be able to withstand his charm any longer.

“Y/N it’s time for you to clock out, if you want to beat the rush and get to your date on time,” your eyes light up.

“Thank you Pen!” you smile gathering your things before clocking out. “See you tomorrow evening.” Penny nods at you, smiling at you softly as you rush out of the door.

__________

Hours have passed along with another failed attempt at online dating. Both things have led to you lying in your bed holding your breath as you imagine what it'd be like if Bradley came home and surprised you.

It started off innocent, him holding your waist close to him, the heat radiating from his chest as you sucked in a deep breath. Basking in his mahogany, sandalwood and vanilla musky scent, it made your knees weak, your eyes roll into the back of your head.

Your body felt hot, like you were boiling from the insides out. Squeezing your legs tightly together to keep your panties from soaking your bedsheets.

While biting your lip you carefully open the shoebox hidden underneath your bed, grabbing your bright pink bullet vibrator. If your dad came home, you’d know, so locking the door wasn’t a big priority.

Sucking in a deep breath you relax against your plush mattress. Licking your lips you spread your legs being gentle while unbuttoning your shirt, being slow with each button to build up the tension.

Once you finally peel off your blouse, you throw it to the side of the room before leisurely unzipping your skirt. You’re starting to become impatient, every part of your body is aching to be touched by Bradley’s calloused hands.

“For fucks sake,” a soft whine escapes your parted lips, squeezing your eyes shut you begin roaming your hands all over your body. You squeeze the soft part of your body, moaning Bradley’s name as you do so.

Spreading your legs, you pull down your panties, running a finger through your soaked lips. Once you find the bundle of nerves you start rubbing soft and steady circles into it, this causes your hips to jerk a little while your eyes roll back.

You wrap a hand around your neck putting a comfortable amount of pressure on it, soft moans spill from your lips as you push your hips up begging for more friction. You press the smooth button, listening to the faint hum, you press down two more times. The soft hum from before has become more intense and slightly louder.

Let’s be honest, masturbation is nothing compared to sex. Especially the sex you’ve been dreaming and lusting over since age 16.

A soft smile forms on your lips as you press the rough tip against the hood of your clit, your muscles all tense up while your breathing stops for just a second. It sounded like a rock or something else small had hit your window, after waiting for a few seconds you decide it's probably nothing and press the vibrator against your nub.

You bite down on your lip harshly, squeezing your neck roughly. Sadly, you have a shitty toy because desperate times call for desperate measures so there isn’t much more it can give. Removing the hand from your neck, pushing two fingers into your pulsating hole.

Unbeknownst to yourself, there was now a visitor in your room, one who snuck in from your open window. Hiding in the dark corner next to your window, a hand clasped against his mouth as he absorbed the sight of you desperate and needy begging for more.

“Bradley harder!” you moan loudly, as you pick up the pace of your fingers,your back arching. Cum spills from your pussy, you sink back into the mattress, sighing discontentedly.

“Oh, Sweetheart.” the familiar voice rings through the now silent room. You instantly throw your hands over your chest and squeeze your legs together tightly. “If you needed some help you could have just asked for it.” Bradley walks out into the middle of your room, staring down at you with darkened eyes.

“B-bradley, when did you get in here?” you try to play it cool but sweat is forming on your forehead as you rapidly cover up with a blanket, eyes shifting to the window.

“Do you mean, how much did I see? Or rather how much I heard?” He raises his eyebrows with a smirk, you nod as your cheeks turn a deep red. “Not much, just you pleading for me to be rougher, is that really how you like it princess?”.

“Bradley! Shut up,” you cover your face with your hands while trying to figure out the best thing for you to do now. “Look, I didn’t know you were stopping by. I’m sorry that you, uhm, that you saw what you saw.” Your voice cracks while you barely take a breath, his shoes clack against the floor as he makes his way to you.

The dip in the bed being the sign that he’s next to you. “Y/N, I really don’t care.” He pries your hands off your face. “I know you didn’t know I was coming into town, because it was a surprise.” He sucks in a deep breath, “I just didn’t know I was the one who would be surprised.”

The room fills with silence, just your accelerated breathing and the ticking of your alarm clock. “Hey Brad… Can you please leave?” you push your face into your knees.

Bradley licks his lips, “I think I have a better idea,” he runs a finger down your spine while pressing kisses into your shoulder. Your body relaxes into him as you sigh quietly, he pulls your face from your legs “Look at me, my pretty girl,” you slowly open your eyes while avoiding making eye contact,

“Darlin’ I want you to look in my eyes,” biting your lower lip you look up at him innocently, his hands move to cup your cheeks and pull you into his face. “Fuck, you’re so hot,” he grips your neck and leans into kiss you.

You move onto his lap while tangling your fingers in his hair, he groans into your mouth before pulling back. Bradley pulls away from your lips and moves to kiss your neck, using his body to push your back against your bed. You gasp as he explores your body with his mouth, calloused fingers pinching your nipples.

Arching into him you moan loudly as he pushes a finger into your throbbing pussy. “You like that?” his voice low and seductive, using his thumb he presses your nub softly. Bradley presses kisses all over your stomach, groaning at the sight of you so needy under him, pre cum leaks from his tip as he grinds against the bed.

“I need you right now, please,” you grab Bradley by his face and pull him up. Kissing his lips passionately while grinding down on his fingers.

“Oh what a needy little slut you are, huh?” He pushes two more fingers into you, “is this what you needed? Or is this a little more up your alley.” He smirks while wrapping a hand around your throat, applying ample pressure.

“Fuck you,” you groan, lips parting as your chest heaves, gasps pouring from your mouth.

“Baby, that's what you’re gonna do,” he taunts, Bradshaw has had enough. He finally lays down and pulls you onto his stomach, his hands massage your thighs as he lifts your hips up.

“Bradley wait,” your hands rest on his chest, “ condom, left middle drawer”. He leans over grabbing the small golden wrapper, ripping it open with his teeth, fumbling with the latex as he squeezes it over his tip.

“Thanks for reminding me princess,” he tucks your hair behind your ear, “now ride me babe,”.

Lining your hole up with his tip you begin to lower yourself down on him, moans leave your parted lips. He furrows his eyebrows, hands moving up to cup your breasts, you sink down on his length, wincing at the uncomfortable stretch.

“Fuck, good girl,” bradley groans, his shakey breathing fills your senses. You lift your hips slowly bouncing on his dick, he grabs your ass squeezing roughly. Your hands explore his abs as you use his body to steady your own.

Your eyes squeeze tight, body tightening up around him. Twirling your fingers into your hair you grasp the strands pulling at his roots.

Bradley flips the pair of you over, his eyes dark and dominant as he hovers over you, his hips thrust into yours at a steady pace. He lowers his head to suck on your erect nipple, one hand wraps around your neck squeezing just enough to slow your breathing.

Your arms wrap around his neck as you pull him to you, kissing his lips passionately, your nails dig into his back. Bradley presses his middle finger into your clit, rubbing rough circles into it, while trying to hold back moans you bury your face in his nape.

His thrusts become sloppy, bradleys hand tightens around your neck causing you to arch into him, he leans down sucking dark hickeys into your neck. “Darling, I’m so close,” the sound of skin slapping fills the room as you nod in response.

“Me too Bradley,” you whine quietly. Bradley uses his middle and pointer finger to rub sloppy circles into your sensitive nub, causing your body to jerk forward and your eyes to flutter shut, soft moans fill his ears.

He runs his hand through your hair pulling your head back. Bradley throws his head back in pleasure, you begin to tighten up around him drawing out a long groan. “Rooster,” you chant his name, “more, please I need more,”, he complies with your desires and angles your bodies so he hits even deeper.

Hugging your body close to his, he thrusts a couple more times before you cum around him, Bradley slows down as he cums. His body jerks softly, “Thats the best welcome home present ive ever gotten love,” he whispers into your ear.

Your bedroom door opens, revealing Maverick, “Get your clothes on and meet me in the living room,” his stern voice shakes you to the core.

Well shit

[clanwarrior-tumbly]

i don't much know tmc so i hope this makes sense, but 65 for adam and jonah and friendly alternate reader? maybe it goes the way you laid out in your original post, where the events of volume 2 make them distrust reader briefly and the fic is set in the aftermath?

Good idea! Also this is slightly different from how I wrote those hcs, but the general idea is still there!

65) "I didn't mean it...please forgive me."

.......

While waiting for your human friends to finish their investigation inside the house, you remained in the van that you all arrived in, trying your best to remain patient.

You would have much rather accompanied them, knowing of the dangers present....however the fragile trust you've formed with the two was close to shattering.

Preacher arrived without any warning on the second night, and you caught her whispering things to Adam while he was trying to get some sleep. Jonah was wide awake and had the misfortune of seeing her face-to-face before he hid somewhere, allowing you to confront her.

Although you succeeded in driving her off by pretending that they were your victims to claim, he wildly misinterpreted your actions and believed you summoned her here to kill them both. He didn't believe your ruse for a second, as he freaked out on you and demanded you to get out.

In fear of triggering a panic attack in the already frightened boy, you just quietly left, but stayed inside the van to ensure that no other Alternates could interfere with the radio signal or hijack it.

Yet as the minutes dragged on, you grew more and more worried about their well being.

Preacher easily believed your lie--considering Alternates were master manipulators--so she won't be coming back anytime soon...but you didn't like the thought of leaving those two all by themselves.

Sometime later you saw the front door open, and you teleported out of the van, finding Jonah standing there. He appeared unharmed, much to your relief.

However that's when you noticed only he emerged from the house..Adam was nowhere in sight.

"Jonah, are you alright? Where's Adam?"

"Th-The basement door opened..and he wanted to check it out. I-I told him not to, but he wouldn't listen!" He panicked, before he suddenly fell silent as his expression turned to a hateful scowl--aimed at you. "I bet you opened it, didn't you? Or was it your freaky lady friend?"

"That was neither my doing nor hers. And she's not my "lady friend"." You huffed, wishing he'd stop accusing you. "Why did you leave him all alone in there? It's too dangerous."

"He doesn't know the first thing about "danger". You don't think I've been trying to tell him these ghost hunts are gonna get us killed one day?! It's like he doesn't even hear me! We both know his mom is dead and he's looking for something that's not actually there..but god forbid I ever tell him that. I'm just sick of him getting pissed off at me for wanting to fucking live."

"I understand your frustration, but..leaving him behind is not the solution here." You tried to reason with him. "To my knowledge that's not how friends should treat each other, even if they-"

"I'm not sure if I even see him as my "friend" anymore." He scoffed, hugging himself as the air grew chillier. "He literally screamed at me to leave, [y/n]. So that's what I'm doing. I don't give a shit about him or the fame or the money anymore. I'm done. I'm going back home. Alone."

Hoping to put this conversation to rest, Jonah stormed past you and hopped into the driver's seat, trying to start the engine...but it wasn't turning on at all.

He tried hotwiring it as well--to no avail.

"Shit, [y/n]..are you doing this?" He glanced at you, annoyed. "Are you screwing with the transmission?"

"........."

"C'mon, I'm not in the mood for-"

"We cannot leave him behind, child." You insisted. As much as you hated to anger your friend, this was the only way he'll listen. "Is this truly how you wish to end things between you two?"

"I'm not a child, I'm a grown ass man. And I've made my choice, and he made his."

"It doesn't have to be that way. I can still help you both-"

"If you're so insistent on "helping" me, you'll let me start this goddamn car and stay out of my life!!" Jonah slammed his hands on the steering wheel, but unfortunately for him, you weren't about to give into his childish tantrum.

"The only way I can help you is by NOT letting you leave." You shook your head, trying to stay calm and logical. "There is no running away anymore, Jonah. If the others realize you are all by yourself...they will come for you, including him."

"...wait, how do you know he'll show up?" He blinked.

"Because...I've known him since our creation. I'm aware of his patterns. Your government calls him Intruder, children call him Stanley....we call him Six. His connection with technology knows no boundaries, including radios and GPS, so it's imperative that I'm here to stop him from- "

"Oh, so you've been bffs with that child kidnapper since the dawn of time...and you're telling me he could've been fucking eavesdropping on all our conversations regarding BPS?!!"

"I.." For a moment you tensed up, realizing you may have said too much. "No, Jonah. That's not what-"

"Damn, I wish I knew all of that before we decided to trust you." Tears welled up in his eyes again, threatening to spill over. "Adam never should've let you come along. I told him he was making a huge mistake letting you out of that TV..and guess who was right?!!"

Your nonexistent heart sunk slightly at his words.

"Jonah, please calm down. You're not thinking-"

You tried setting a comforting hand on his shoulder, but he violently smacked it away before your claws could even graze his jacket.

"DON'T FUCKING TOUCH ME!! You're all the same....you're a bunch of heartless, lying, demonic bastards who destroyed our lives and made our loved ones kill themselves!!" He choked out. "You've taken everything from us...a-and if it weren't for you....THEN MAYBE ADAM WOULD STILL BE ALIVE RIGHT NOW!!"

You physically flinched at his screaming, having never seen a human look so enraged...yet sorrowful at the same time. The emotions emanating from him were quite powerful, and when he stopped to take several deep breaths, you needed a moment to absorb them all.

But seeing as you didn't immediately leave, Jonah felt his resolve completely crumble as he gritted his teeth together, trying to stop his sobs from escaping..only for them to come out as small hiccups and gasps.

"J-Just stop pretending to care, alright? Go and...a-and leave me be." Tears streaked down his face as he clutched the steering wheel with trembling hands, laying his head on it as he tried muffling his sobs.

He felt like he just gave himself M.A.D with how badly he felt like dying right now.

Although you were initially stunned by his emotions going from one extreme to the other so quickly, you snapped out your shock and frowned slightly at his distraught state.

'He's so young...and has gone through far too much...'

You gently reached over to set your hand on his back, feeling his entire body trembling beneath your fingertips. Surprisingly enough, he didn't shove your comfort away this time as he was too busy scrubbing away his tears.

You understood that he didn't actually mean those hurtful things. He just needed to lash out after all the stress of these past few nights, and you so happened to be the closest person--whose species is the very cause of his anxieties.

"[Y/n]..I-I..I know you're not like the others. It's just...I'm so lost and I'm so fucking scared to lose one more friend...!" His voice cracked. "I-I don't wanna lose him.."

"I know, my little fish.." You soothed. "I know your heart and mind are deeply troubled. I know you're very afraid...but rest assure, I will not let anything bad happen to either of you. Whatever you think of my kind is fine, but please understand that I would never pretend to care for your safety. It is...my purpose to protect you both from their evil ways."

"..a-according to who?"

"Me. Not my "Savior" or anybody else." Taking your hand off his back, you stepped away as he finally looked up at you. His eyes were wet and tinted red from crying so hard, but through blurred vision he could see you offering your hand. "Come, let us seek out Adam. I sense he is still alive."

With a small nod, Jonah grasped your hand so you could help him out of the van, though as soon as you let him go....he hugged you unexpectedly.

You blinked, looking down at him in confusion. "Jonah? Is everything okay?"

"Y-Yeah, I...I'm just sorry about what I said to you." He sniffled quietly, his forehead pressed to your chest. "I didn't mean it..please forgive me. You know how I tend to say stupid shit when I'm scared and-"

"You needn't justify yourself, my friend. I absolve you." You smiled as you patted his head. "I have gotten worse insults in my lifetime, so they don't affect me as much."

"Good to know. Also...why did you call me "little fish"? I don't hate it or anything, but I was wondering."

"Ah, because you remind me of some...old friends, we'll say. Were you ever told the story of Jonah and the Whale?"

"...uh-"

"What ever happened to "I won't be here to confirm that"?"

The moment was cut short as Jonah suddenly let you go, looking back to see Adam emerge from the house completely unharmed. He had the camcorder and other equipment in his arms, and an annoyed expression on his face.

As he approached the van, he stopped short upon seeing the other male, blinking in bewilderment. "Were you crying?"

"..n-no, it's the allergies. I told you it's that damn cat's fault.." After making a point to wipe his eyes, Jonah shoved his hands into his pockets. "So um...what did you find in that basement?"

"Just an old TV. And you're right about that cat..it was actually an Alternate. But I got some other good footage, so I'm ready to bail."

"What about staying-?"

"We'll tell the lady we stayed all three nights." Adam shrugged. "It's not like she'll know."

"Oh, so now you listen?"

"....look, this shit's getting heavy. So if you don't mind-"

"I'll help." You spoke up, disliking this growing tension in the air as you took the heavier equipment away from Adam and loaded up the van with it.

But still, you refused to allow it to start, and Jonah knew exactly why.

He couldn't just act like he didn't have that huge fight with his friend only a short time ago, so they both talked for a few minutes, apologizing to one another and hugging it out.

When they heard the engine crank on, they immediately rushed towards the van...only to see you sitting behind the wheel, much to their confusion.

They didn't know Alternates could drive.

"You kids had a rough few nights. I'll take us wherever you desire to go." You offered.

"Jeez, since when did we have our own chaperone?" Adam rolled his eyes, but opted to climb into the back while Jonah called shotgun. "I guess we owe you an apology too, right?"

"Well..Jonah and I talked it out already, but I forgive you both."

"Yeah...I still feel like shit, though."

"Dude," the brunette huffed. "What did you say to them?"

Jonah opened his mouth to speak, but thought better of it as he didn't wanna bring up the harsh words he said out of frustration and anxiety. Instead he just shook his head. "I-It doesn't matter. Let's just get outta here and go for some pizza."

"I would very much like that." You agreed, backing out of the driveway and heading down the main road.

"And....as thanks for putting up with our bullshit, we'll let you pick the toppings this time."

"What?!" Adam's jaw dropped, but your smile only grew, and he had no choice but to relent.

It was certainly something to think about on the way to the pizza shop you all knew and loved.

[eddieismypimp]

My love, are you okay?

Chapter 1: I haven't seen you around before

Wanings: definite grammar errors, cussing, cringe lowkey, probably major spelling errors. nothing to major or serious. That will be happening in the later chapters.

A/N: This is quite literally terrible but maybe it's because I'm rusty. I haven't wrote in a while. I hope you guys enjoy anyway and I hope it gets better in the future chapters.

My POV:

Five days. It's been five days since I officially moved to the little, weird town of Nockfell. Five days since I started my job at the record store, and five days since I've had any interaction with anyone I actually ENJOYED conversing with. Don't get me wrong, I'm glad I made the decision to move out on my own, I love my job, but I didn't realize how lonely I would be with no one here. Today has been especially excruciating considering my manager only had me scheduled today and there's only been two customers. I looked at the clock... I still had an hour and a half until I can clock out and go home to cuddle with my cat Dior. She was a cute, fluffy black cat. She's a cuddle bug too. I slumped over the desk with a groan. I would kill to be at home relaxing with Dior right now.... Just as I was daydreaming about being home in my comfy bed, watching netflix, I heard the chime of the front door. Oh thank god. I thought, standing up straight, looking towards the door. I saw a group of about 5 people walk in. "Hi guys!" I said. Getting a chorus of hey's, and hi's in return. "Welcome in, let me know if there's anything you need help with" I say. "Alright, thank you!" A guy with long brown hair responded barely even acknowledging my existence as they explored the store. "No problem!" I said, walking around the store, putting records away, pretending that I had been working the whole time. I took some time to observe the people who came in. There was a guy with long brown hair, a boy with dark skin with his arm around the shoulders of a boy with bright orange hair, a pale girl with long dark brown hair and a very pale guy with long blue hair and.... a mask? I looked at the person in interest and confusion. Then they spoke to the guy with the brown hair. "Larry look, they have it!" He said holding up a record, I couldn't see the artist though. Damn... he's got a deep voice.... lowkey got some muscle to him too... I don't know if this is my mask kink talking but he's kinda fine..."Hell yeah!" The guy he called Larry shouted, walking over to him. I decided to walk over to the two, maybe I could even make friends with them so I wouldn't be so lonely here. I doubt it though, I'm absolutely terrible at making conversation. "Hey, you guys finding everything okay?" I asked with a smile. You couldn't have thought of anything more basic? I thought, scolding myself internally. They paused for a moment, both giving me a once over. A few seconds go by neither one of them saying anything until the guy with brown hair nudges the guy with blue hair with his elbow. He cleared his throat. "Oh, uh, yeah. We're good." He says. Damn...I thought, Boring ass response. "Okay." I say with a smile and beginning to walk off, accepting the fact that these people probably did not want to be bothered by the worker. "Uh, wait.." I heard one of them say. I turned around. "What's up?" I asked politely.

Sal's POV:

Larry, Neil, Todd, Ashley and I decided to go to the record store today. Sanity's Fall released a new album a couple days ago and we were hoping the record store would have it. We were greeted as soon as we walked in. We all let out a hey, or a hi. I looked over to see who the voice was connected to and my breathe hitched. Holy shit.....I've never seen her before...she's gorgeous... "Welcome in, let me know if there's anything you need help with" She says. "Alright, thank you!" Larry responded, going to walk in the opposite direction. "Larry," I said walking up to him. "What's up?" He asked looking through records. "Bro, look at the worker, shes so hot." I said pointing to where she was standing putting some records away. She had brown skin, black super curly hair, a lip piercing, both sides of her nose done, her septum done, her eyebrow... multiple tattoos on her arms and legs. She was wearing a maroon corset, black skirt with two chains hanging from it, and black platforms. My god.. Larry chuckled. "She is hot bro, go get her man, go talk to her." Larry said nudging me towards her. "No man... she's way to hot for me." I said pushing him back. "Shut up." He said laughing. Then we split off into our own directions looking for the Sanity's fall record. After barely even a minute of looking I found the Sanity's fall record. "Larry look, they have it!" I said. "Hell yeah!" Larry said walking over to me. "Hey, you guys finding everything okay?" I heard. I turned my head. I knew it was her but I was still taken by surprise to see her standing so close. I took her in, seeing her piercings and tattoos up close. I saw a tattoo of a pumpkin on her wrist and bats going up her arm. There was alot more but those are the main ones that caught my eye. I didn't realize I was just staring until Larry nudged me. I cleared my throat. "Oh, uh, yeah. We're good." I say, internally cursing myself for that boring ass response. "Okay." She said with a smile, turning to walk away. I couldn't let her walk away, I had to say something. . "Uh, wait.." I say nervously. Nice one dumbass.. She turned around! Thank god. "What's up?" She asked politely. Think Sal, come on... "Are you from here? I haven't seen you around before?" I asked. She smiled. "No, I'm not from here," She said, "I actually just moved here like five days ago." "Oh, that's cool!" I said a little to enthusiastically, "Do you have family or friends here?" I hope she doesn't think that was creepy.

My POV:

"Do you have family or friends here?" He asked me. I smiled slighlty, glad he's attempting to continue the conversation but also not knowing if I should answer truthfully or not. Considering I still didn't even know his name. Yes he's hot but he's still a whole ass stranger. Fuck it.."Nope," I decided to answer truthfully, "I decided to move out on my own. I don't know why I chose somewhere with absolutely no one that I know." I say, nervously chuckling. He chuckled a little too. I noticed that the Larry guy had walked away to join his other friends and left the blue haired guy here alone to converse with me. "Doesn't that get lonely though?" He asked sounding genuinely concerned. I sighed. "Yeah, it does get pretty lonely, and boring," I say, "It's just my cat and I." "You have a cat?!" He asked excitedly. "Yes! Her name is dior." I said with a smile. "I have a cat too, his name is Gizmo." He said. "Awww, I love cats." I said in adoration. "I do too," He said, "So, whats your name?" He asked, he semed a little nervous or anxious. Glad I'm not the only one. "My name is y/n," I said, sticking my hand out. This feels way to formal, why the hell did I stick my hand out... "My name is Sal." He said, thankfully taking my hand in his and shaking it, making me feel less awkward. "Hi Sal." I said sweetly. "Hi y/n." He mocked in a playful way making me chuckle a bit. "Well.. if you ever need someone to hang out with or something... my friends and I would be down.." He said, looking down, putting a hand on the back of his neck. I damn near let out a squeal. Fuck yeah.. thank you god. Okay, okay y/n, compose yourself. Keep your cool. "Uh, yeah," I said smiling, "I would love that!" To enthusiastic girl come on now...He chuckled. "Cool.. can I have your number?" He asked, holding out his phone to me. "Sure." I said, taking the phone from him and putting my number in. He took his phone back. "I guess I'll be texting you." He said. "I hope so." I said, looking him up and down, trying to sound flirty. Hopefully that was sexy and not dumb as shit. "Y-yeah," He said, turning to go join his friends again. "I'll see you." "Yeah, I'll see you." I said, walking back to the register.

Sal's POV:

I actually asked for her number, fuck yeah. Go Sal. "I guess I'll be texting you." I said, trying to sound confident. "I hope so." She said looking me up and down. My god that was sexy. "Y-yeah," I said. Goddamn stuttering. "I'll see you." I said, turning around to head back to everyone. "Yeah, I'll see you." She said with that sweet voice of hers. Fuck... my jeans are tight...

[maddrumsticks2]

Just finished Skyward Sword! And I finished A Link Between Worlds a few days ago.

So, double post time! I'll start with ALBW because I had a few days to sit on that one.

Also just realized that with the completion of Skyward Sword, I have officially played and completed every 3D Zelda game! YIPPEEE!

(Long post below the cut!! Along with major spoilers for both aforementioned games!)

Ravio is SO SILLY. Though, he's already talked about a lot. Anything I could say about him has probably already been said.

But hey, I can't help but really like this silly guy who stole my house and all my rupees, okay? He's a little rascal.

So instead, I love Hilda having a clear motivation behind her actions. She is just trying to restore her kingdom. She wants her people to thrive. But she turned to the triforce instead of trying to find better meds to maybe help her people. Though the place was literally breaking apart, so maybe there really wasn't anything else that would've worked.

The story of this game is really heavy in the last 30 minutes, and that's really it. Before that it's just dungeons. Oh, and helping Ravio retire. I absolutely LOVED that XD

So, the distribution of the story could've been done better. But really, this game is so underrated for a Zelda game. Also, the whole moving through walls thing is super fun. LOVED that mechanic. Altogether, great game.

Okay, on to Skyward Sword!

SO good. This game does NOT deserve all of the negativity the surrounded it for some reason. Sure, I used button controls (I couldn't figure out motion controls for the life of me pff) but STILL! I think the Switch version definitely made it easier on me. Though idk what the Wii version is like so I shouldn't be trying to compare them lol.

On to non-gameplay stuff, the dungeons were so cleverly designed. As someone who is not particularly smart, I never found myself super stuck in the dungeons. Instead, I had a lot of fun with them! That's always a plus with me, but I don't find too much shame in looking up a walkthrough here or there.

Story! So fun! I loved Groose's character arc especially. I totally despised him at first but he reached silly status pretty quickly. His character was handled really well, too. He didn't just flip personalities. He showed his flip through his actions, not his words. Which for Groose is a perfect choice.

Also, Ghirahim is SUCH a theatre kid. Nothing can change my mind on that. (And before anyone gets mad, I'M a theatre kid. I know what we act like.)

I find it interesting that the whole game only takes place in three regions that you visit over and over again. Other Zelda games have done this before, but I think Skyward Sword does it the most. I loved all the regions, but tbh I think the forest was the most boring to me. The Ancient Cistern was cool though. I won't deny that. Also, Eldin was probably the most traumatizing for Sky. SO many bad things happened there lol. Like being burned because of how hot it is, then finding chains Zelda has definitely been bound in, being told he was too late. Then he comes back later and not much traumatizing stuff that time. Maybe getting chased by lava, probably not lasting trauma, just scary for a minute lol. But when he comes back a final time, the volcano erupts, covering the sky in ash and leaving him with no return to the sky. To make matters worse, he gets beaten up and captured by monsters and all his stuff was stolen. Wow I just wrote a lot about Eldin pfff

Sadly, I already knew about the whole Zelda is Hylia thing. I kinda wish I hadn't known that. That cutscene probably would've been cooler if I played this game in the complete dark.

Also, Link is so subtly expressive in this game. He actually has facial expressions! I love how at the end of the game, you can SEE Link's determination. You can see his desire to cut Demise down and save his world. I LOVE his expressiveness!

One thing I didn't know was that Demise was the Imprisoned. That actually surprised me.

Then there's Impa. I already figured out that the Old Lady was Impa before the reveal. So that was just "I called it." But here's the silly part about that cutscene: I read fanfic saying she died once. But of course I let my guard down. I believed that the author had Impa die from Ghirahim hitting her. And so, literally one text box away from the scene, I sent my sister in law a text like "lol, idk why I thought Impa dies. She's literally been here the whole time."

I had to send a text probably two seconds late saying "nvm, she died."

Whoopsies, silly me XD

Last thing I wanna say! (I think.) The whole lightning in the end battle is SICK! And now all the lighting scars people give Sky make sense. That's probably one of my favorite scar headcanons, honestly. That and Wild's blast scar. Also love giving Twilight a nasty arm scar, but I'm getting off track.

So yeah! Those are my silly disjointed thoughts on both the games I finished recently! Now I only have 2D games left to play. My list became so much smaller! It went from having ten games to just five.

Just have the Oracles games, Link's Awakening, the original and Adventure of Link to play! (I'm debating which one to start with. Probably the Oracles games to I can get Legend's character down better.)

Yay! Wall of text!

[monstersinthecosmos]

🔥 + kink in VC

(also thinking like in comparison to Anne's other books like CoSB and realizing VC is so fucking mild and antis have no business being in Anne Rice fandom)

Dsjgkalsdg comrade why are you asking me this you know I’m about to launch into a TED Talk.

So like, if we compare Anne’s Sleeping Beauty books to VC, I feel like the kink is meta in two completely different ways, like opposite ends of the spectrum. In SB, the BDSM is meta in the sense that it’s built into the universe. They are not books ABOUT BDSM, they are books about fantasy and the kinks just get to exist. It’s an immersive fantasy that takes all the ways people play IRL and makes it canon. And a lot of people who dislike them (based on like bad GoodReads reviews LOL) ONLY see them as rape books and don’t really understand the way it’s giving BDSM a space to breathe.

What vanilla folks don’t understand is that IRL BDSM is also fiction a lot of the time. Even tame shit like spanking and talking dirty—do these people actually want their partners to hit them in their day-to-day lives? Do they want to be catcalled and lewded outside of the scene? Probably not! And even going to more in depth scenes like, do you actually think you’re someone’s kitty? Do you actually want an assailant to tie you up? Do you actually want to be trafficked?

No! You dont’! You want to play pretend with your partner, with whom you’ve consented.

And I think this attitude in the bad reviews is also the attitude that fanfic writers get from conservatives/radfems/swerfs/fancops in fandom, that somehow writing noncon fic or darkfic in general is somehow making these atrocious things literal, when in fact THEIR EXISTENCE WITHIN A WORK OF FICTION AUTOMATICALLY MAKES THEM NOT LITERAL. And people need to understand that the consent for stories like this is not about the fictional people involved who do not exist and therefore cannot consent, but between the reader and the author when you open the book.

Anyway I bring that up because these books tell me a lot about Anne’s sensibility for kink. SHE GETS IT MAN. She wasn’t shy about it. So I think it speaks very broadly to the way power dynamics and monsterfuckery are expressed within VC, as well, even though these are two very opposite ends of the spectrum with her writing, I think that same confidence and kink positivity still exists. There's also a foreward to the copy of SB that I read, I think she added in 2012, and it was SO insightful about her process and her intention writing the kink & porn the way she did and I just think she really fucking understood what she was doing. And it's so telling to me because like, she mentions she used the pen name when she first wrote them because her father was alive and she was embarrassed, and one of the first scenes in SB is Beauty being stripped naked and paraded around IN FRONT OF HER FATHER LOL. So like WITHOUT GOING OFF ON A SIDE TANGENT something else vanilla folks don't understand is that so often kink is about the thing being transgressive and gross and uncomfortable; IT'S HOT BECAUSE IT'S UNCOMFORTABLE. It's not something that anyone literally wants, it's just hot because it's WRONG. And I think often about how this is like, the sex equivalent of trying not to laugh at an off-color joke, and how it's not that the joke is funny but that it's so off-putting that you laugh at the absurdity of it.

I feel like the kink in VC is meta in an opposite way, in the way it’s so symbolic and understated. Also because the vampires are asexual it gives a whole layer of like non-sexual BDSM dynamics are it’s SO GOOD. 

So I think coming from an author was not squeamish about writing immersive BDSM, a lot of those themes are in VC and I wonder if they come from the same place, even if it’s subliminal on her part. Like the power dynamics, consent around biting, THE CONSTANT MONSTERFUCKING & FLIRTING WITH DEATH AKA “THE SWOON”. And even later in TVA with the introduction of the whipping scene and all Armand’s comments about getting tied up and having his fuckin, pit hair tugged on or whatever. 

And it has some of those like sort of dubcon romance tropes that I think we can’t discard; being TAKEN! Being OVERPOWERED! It ties into vampire fiction in general with like, vampires historically being a symbol of sexuality, going back to like Dracula comin in ur window and everything. 

But VC never makes it “about” kink, it’s just like SB, just baked into the themes. And like a lot of the more obvious BDSM themes in VC are also not consensual, they’re just built into the universe. Like Armand stalking/abusing Daniel, like Marius whipping Armand without negotiating first, like Akasha’s femdom murder bender. And even how often biting gets used as a symbol for sex, and how often noncon biting gets called rape! And the characters know it! And they do it anyway! (Also I cannot neglect to mention obvious tropes like Marius/Armand just being a teacher/student trope. IT'S A PORN TROPE! Or what about Gabrielle as Mommy!Dom? PORN TROPE! Quinn/Goblin twincest? PORN TROPE! The exhibitionism/public humiliation on the TDV stage hello???? That's like an Upper Floor party come on LOL. [this type of dynamic is also SO SO prevalent in SB.])

I’m not really sure what my conclusion here is because like, I just think this is all here in the books and it’s really excellent fodder to talk about kink and character dynamics. Power dynamics is so huge in BDSM and it’s so so huge in VC, not just like, vampires being old and powerful and having that as a status symbol over one another, but even emotionally speaking like. TELL ME THAT ARMAND & LESTAT AREN’T ABSOLTUELY SOAKED IN HUMILIATION AND BEGGING. Taking inventory of VC ships like there’s ALWAYS a dominant and a submissive, it’s so rare that people are just equals with each other, and it’s always part of the appeal! 

There’s this psychologist Esther Perel, I think she’s brilliant and she’s very kink positive and has a bunch of podcasts and stuff. I read her book Mating in Captivity and she brought up this whole thing about kink and power dynamics and how like, it’s not always clear who’s in charge, and you can’t judge relationships based on who’s older, who makes more money, who’s larger, etc, because power dynamics are so much more complicated than that. She uses the example that if you’ve ever been in public with a screaming toddler, which of you is really the dominant? I think about this constantly!

And like speaking about real life kink being so deeply about CONSENT means so much to me with this conversation about VC, too, because like even looking at a relationship like Marius & Human!Armand or Armand and Human!Daniel, it doesn’t matter that one is a powerful vampire if they also feel so tenderly towards their fragile little human. TVA was very explicit about this when they have that conversation about which one of them is the other’s slave. So in BDSM even though we look at the dom as being the one in control, the consent is the thing in control and ultimately the SUB is in control by permitting all of it! 

So I just feel very strongly about all of this, it’s all over VC, and even when it’s less obvious (relationships like Loustat, like Lestat/Armand, even Louis/Claudia) there are so many of these power elements to examine. Even if it’s not written TO BE KINKY they’re still there and I think it’s all connected, because I’m kink positive and I love unpacking this stuff. 

AND ALSO LIKE ON THE ASEXUAL FRONT, I love it so much because like as a kinky ace, and knowing as many kinky aces as I know, there’s SO MUCH KINK out there that is NOT SEXUAL so I think it just translates so nicely to VC vampires being asexual, like it all makes so much fucking sense to me and it’s so fun and I adore it so much!!! 

THIS WAS PURE STREAM OF CONSCIOUSNESS IM GONNA POST IT BEFORE I GET WORRIED THAT IM NOT COHESIVE, ENJOY!!! 

[wespirallin]

sweet tooth fanfic idea

Okay so people, I just finished watching the last season of Sweet Tooth on Netflix, and holy moly is it so good. I had a few fanfic ideas that I hoped were already written, but if you're in the community, you've realized by now that we're kinda small.

So I decided to write my own (yay!!). I don't wanna give any spoilers but it's going to be about a bird hybrid oc (Mack) that's found and semi-raised by the Animal Army.

I want to focus on a few specific (all platonic so far) relationships Mack has and how his character grows as the seasons progress. I literally just wrote chapter one of the fic and decided to come talk about it on tumblr lol.

Anyway, here's the first chapter. It's more like a prologue that features Mack's dad who is going to be very relevant to the story later on.

Chapter 1 / prologue

It was just a regular Tuesday for Benjamin Crane when the end of the world hit. Well, at least when shit started to get actually real. Perhaps dumbing down the Great Crumble to a specific day wasn’t the most accurate way of looking at history, but it helped keep him sane. 

It was the end of a long shift for Benjamin and he just wanted to go home to his wife, but he had one more argument to get through.

“Sam, I already told you. We had Room 3 booked from the very start of the week. Everything’s already prepped up for the surgery tomorrow. I can’t just bail out of it. The patient -hell the kid's family is counting on me.”

“So?”, dared to ask his collogue “I still don’t get how you can’t just rope Sthe new guy teve in. He has no major operations on for tomorrow as far as I know. And he’s more than capable of getting the job done. Not to burst your ego bubble, Benji but you’re as replaceable as the rest of us mate”

Benjamin made an incredulous expression. “Well if I’m ‘perfectly replaceable’, why don’t you go find another guy to help you co-op your operation?” he scowled.

“Come on, you know I need a plastic surgeon for this. There’s no way I can reconstruct that hand on my own. And last I checked, there wasn’t another one of you guys in the market. So you’re my best shot. You in or out?”, pleaded the surgeon.

Normally, Sam wouldn’t have needed another pair of hands to help him out, however, this one was a special case. The patient was a 20-year-old guy, who got his hand caught in a machine of sorts. According to the X-ray results, the hand was broken from multiple different places, and several tendons were snapped. As a general surgeon, hands weren’t Sam’s specialty. And no matter how much pride he had in his abilities, he knew when to ask for help. Even when it killed him inside. Even when it was from his best friend/arch-enemy (who was way too arrogant for his own good).

The argument was interrupted by the blaring alarm of an incoming ambulance. That was nothing out of the ordinary, seeing that the two colleagues were in the break area just outside the ER. Just as Benji opened his mouth the reply, the doors of the ambulance flew open and a team of medical personnel (who were decked out in hazmat suits for some reason) rushed a stretcher into the ER.

The two barely had the chance to take a look at the patient before she was out of sight. The woman looked deathly pale and her face had a sickly yellow hue to it along with beads of sweat that had drenched her hair and clothes. The skin around her nose and eyes were red and if Benji looked close enough, he was sure that he could see a few exposed arteries. The one thing that had unsettled both men was the rapidly twitching pinkie finger, which seemed to be the only sign of life from the patient.

After losing about five percent of the population of Earth, the Sick had seemed to be taken under control. The hospitals around the world had had about a month of Sick-less break until now. It seemed that another wave of the Sick was incoming.

Benji grimaced and bit his lip.

“That was…”

“Unsettling as fuck.”

“That’s one word for it.”

“You think it’s back?”,  Sam tried to steady his voice. 

He had lost his wife and kids to the first wave. Benji’s heart ached for him but he pushed the bitter feelings down. Getting sentimental never helped anyone. It hadn’t helped the woman he saw as a sister nor had it helped the two little innocent children he loved as his nieces.

“I don’t think it was ever gone in the first place” Benji answered honestly and took a few deep breaths to calm himself.

The lingering hazmat team outside the ER didn’t help settle any of their nerves, but they had more pressing matters to get back to. Sam patted Benji’s shoulder a few times before opening his mouth to speak.

“Think about it yeah? You still have the rest of the afternoon to think about it, but be quick. Promise, I’ll organize everything and I’ll talk to Steve. See if he’s up for covering your little case of local anesthesia.”  

Benji snorted at that and shook his head in disbelief. What part of a ‘3-hour very important surgery’ did his friend not understand?

The patient up next was a nine year old kid that had fallen on his face. His parents had said that he slipped from some monkey bars. A broken nose and . It was nothing that major compared to what Benji usually dealt with, but these were the relatives of a friend he was talking about. Benji pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration, damn had he missed the old days where all he had to do was get in and out of a surgery. Managing the scheduling of the patients without any secretarial help in a collapsing world wasn’t the easiest thing in the world.

The hospital was short of staff at the moment, as it constantly was after the new ‘Sick Pandemic’ had broken out. Almost all of the nurses and other staff were either dead or transferred to ER or to the patient care areas that were heavily quarrantiened. 

Finally, he let out a sigh of defeat and grunted. Hand operations were his favorite anyways.

“Fine, but I’m not organizing shit -and the beers on Friday are on you. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a very grumpy and pregnant wife to go back to.” 

Sam forgot about the topic at hand at the mention of Pemma, a school friend of his. He let out an excited chuckle. He clapped Mikey’s shoulder.

“Oh yeah, how could I forget? Congratulations dude! I’m so happy for you two. Finally, becoming parents eh? Say hi to Pemma and Sam Jr for me yeah?”

“Sam for the last time, we’re not naming my child Sam Jr!”

“Pleaaseee? And it’s a unisex name. It can be short for Samantha if it’s a girl, or for Samuel or whatever that starts with Sam. Or it can be just Sam if it decides to be non binary or something one day! See? Win-win.”

The younger man gave him an unimpressed look and raised an eyebrow.

“Sam, my kid is not going to be nonbinary. See you tomorrow for the surgery, idiot.”

Benji pushed past Sam and walked toward his car. Now he had a very unpleasant phone call to make to the family of the kid he was supposed to operate the next day.

Benjamin Crane drove straight home, completely unsuspecting of what the future had in store for him, his wife, and his soon-to-be-born child.

Okay so that was that. Some feedback would be very welcome because I feel lost on which platform to post it on or if it would get any traction at all. I'd probably keep working on it tbh just to scratch that writing itch inside me but oh well. We'll see. Go watch sweet tooth if you haven't yet btw, it's amazing.

[ambelle]

I’ve talked vaguely about white liberals treatment of BW both in real life and in fandom spaces but I feel I should expand on that.

A while back a BW wrote an article about how BM are the white people of the black community. White people were offended and baffled and BM protested. The thing is it's very much true. BM, along with BW are oppressed under a system stacked against us (along with many other demographics), but because BW are women we are also oppressed by BM.

White liberals have the privilege to not have grown up in the hood like I did. So they can claim a world without cops wouldn't turn into open season on BW at the hands of BM. They can say gangs, drive-bys, and drug dealers aren't dangerous and BM shouldn't be prevented from doing it. But when I was little I couldn't use the playgrounds because drug dealers used them as a place to deal and recruit little boys. I couldn't go to the local skating rink because gangs would go there to fight and shoot it up. I had to play in the street with my friends because the MEN in the community were ruining spaces meant for children. Erasing safety in general actually. Not the white president, the men in the community. I can say systematic racism and the BM who did a random drive-by on my house and raped little girls were both oppressing me. Both are true.

But it's not true to the white liberals who have a complete blind spot when it comes to BW because they don't acknowledge we are women. They see us as strong unwavering aggressive machines. We make good allies but they don't need to help us because we are invincible duh. It's the "bw saved the day" shit after every election followed by them going right back to ignoring us the next day.

It's them ignoring all the crazy stats about violence against BW to whitesplain to us how abolishing the police is a great idea. The men harming us will simply stop if they know we don't even have someone we may call for help. Let's abolish the police because they harm BM and BM never do anything they should be arrested for including my rapist. He was simply a victim of white supremacy and I should have hugged him after like the strong mammy I was born to be. No need to talk about black femicide.

Basically, white liberals care about BM (because it's trendy not because they give a shit see ANTIFA), BW care about BM, BM care about BM, and no one gives a shit about BW. That's the reality

But white libs in fandoms are racist in a different way. They like to adopt the struggles of demographics that are oppressed in real life and apply it to white characters. It's why characters like Silco and Jinx are so appealing to them.

(both trying to kill Zaunites here BTW)

Make no mistake If Silco were black fans would be holding them accountable same with Jinx. But they are white and they are (were) oppressed. That's literally a white liberal dream. They get to ignore the fact that Silco and Jinx are rich and they got rich by oppressing poor people and forcing children into child labor.

(that Zaunite teen boy died not that anyone cares. )

They get to weaponize classism to excuse the violence and murder they commit against other poor people. Who cares how many orphans he creates or how many poor children he tries to murder.

Mind you not only was Silco rich off the backs of poor people and the labor of kids, he used the enforcers to help him not only oppress his own people but also frame Ekko (ironically a BM) and the Firelights for crimes he and Jinx were committing.

Jinx who killed multiple Zaunites on purpose and tried to kill Ekko later on. Jinx who is rich and has no motive for the violence she commits. Jinx who is working for the man she KNOWS killed her father figure and tried to kill her siblings. Jinx who never once takes responsibility for any of the choices she makes. But she's white. It's why the fandom supports her hetero ship with Ekko (who they headcanon as being her emotional crutch). They only care about heteronormativity when there is a black woman they want to erase. No other straight pairing gets called "disgusting", "forced", "shoehorned", "a betrayal", or "immoral". Mel is forceful and aggressive. She's a seductress who manipulates Jayce into her bed and into doing her evil deeds.

(He's clearly not into her at all)

He should be kissing Vik's ass and worshipping the ground he walks on. Speaking of Viktor ...him using tech for his own gains, secretly merging his DNA with the core, getting addicted to shimmer, killing a fellow Zaunite and converting up her death + stealing her notes is something no one will discuss.

Because he's white , was once poor, and is "gay-coded". He's thus entitled to murdering a brown woman and entitled to Jayce's body. They weaponize LGBTQ+ rep in order to justify their racism much like the left does in real life.

Mel who shows no ill will towards Viktor is accused of being ableist and classist because she gave him a look when he was arguing with her. Mel who explains why she wants defensive weapons and has several scenes reiterating her motive is accused of wanting war and genocide.

Mel who has exchanged flirty looks with Jayce every episode before she kisses him is accused of raping him. Mel who isn't at all a part of the Vander/Silco/Jinx shenanigans in ep 1 is blamed for the death of Jinx's family because she "controls the council" (even though they often vote against her and Heimerdinger gets a pass despite being there when the cities were founded). Because she's black and rich. Thus they can weaponize poverty in order to villainize BW.

They shout over the people who are actually oppressed. Over the people who know what it's like to have drug dealers and gangs make your life hell while the government does the same on a less personal scale.

This is what white liberals do. It's not new. I won't even get into the weird ass envy/hatred/lust thing they have for bw. The dehumanizing and hypersexualizing shit they do is a whole other essay.

[skzoologist]

My mooties

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⤐ @dmnksrt - One of my irl best friends, you guys can thank her for so much, because she is my number 1 fan and keeps cheering me on. Without her, I wouldn't have written this much. She's a victim of accidentally being converted into a kpop fan, purely because I was also dragged into the fandom. Even though she stans another group and man (Suga), we still ramble to each other for hours easily. Once she gathers the courage to post her own fanfics, you can be sure I'll be there to support her immediately. Her brain is wonderful, just like her, I wouldn't hesitate to commit arson for her sake. Her tag is 'my Darling', no, we aren't dating, in case any of Nat's anons come here asking that.

⤐ @nerenbe - Well well well, if it isn't my menace herself. This lil gremlin is the sole reason I am in this fandom altogether, since she just kept singing 'Star lost' while we were in the Christmas market in the year 2023. I guess this is what I get for dragging her into so many animes and manhwas, haha. She isn't really active here, but know that she loves to murder me with pics and memes of my bias and wrecker. Truly, she lives up to her nickname.

⤐ @shetherocket - The last of my irl best friends, the poor one who isn't in the kpop fandom and has no idea wtf I am saying to her, ever. It's really funny actually, as she just nods as I speak, no clue about anything. But she likes Felix! Loves his softness and sunshine self, so I sometimes spam her with him lmao. I am never going to be sorry for that :D

⤐ @thightswideforhanin - First ever person to loudly admit Bae wrecked her, and hard. I always enjoy her reblogs, she was one of the first ever active members of my blog.

⤐ @michelle4eve - A shy follower of mine who gathered enough courage to speak to me, and would you look at that, we speak more regularly now :) She's very sweet, which is why I just call her my Sunshine.

⤐ @jinnie-ret - Jinnie-ret, Jinnie-ret, the person who started it all. She was the first skz writer who noticed me and decided to raid my blog, quite literally. She recommended my work on her blog and I got a big influx of people, making me breach the 100 followers threshold. I still can't believe she'd followed me back, when I've been her silent follower for months by that point. While we don't speak a lot, as she is busy, I know she's very welcoming and kind (also my brit mum, because she decided to adopt me lmao).

⤐ @atinyniki - Niki, my precious little pocket pookie who just loves to pester me and absolutely shower me in love, no matter how hard I keep pushing it away (this is the norm for me and my friends). She's absolutely sweet and so strong, I look up to her in that sense to this very day. We easily start gushing about ATEEZ or my husky puppies for a good while, or even start planning some gut-wrenching fics together xD I am so happy she wrote to me, even if she keeps insisting I am cute, falsely.

⤐ @writingforstraykids - Nat, my talented menace! I love her art, oh my god, I cannot wait for her to draw more, even if that is a year later or more. And her soft thoughts? Hell yes! She's the one who usually gets to see my own random thoughts about the boys (hence our collab), because she's my mootie and they get VIP services :) I am forever afraid she's gonna do what my menace does and send me pics of the boys... I would straight up die on the spot.

⤐ @cheesemonky - Leisel! While we don't talk a lot (timezone differences and my depressed, anxious self), she's cute and so supportive. I just know if we would talk more, our chat would be filled with rambles and thoughts about TXT, haha.

⤐ @yangbbokari - Mumu, the chaos child. We didn't get to know each other well yet, but she loves to say random shit and cause mayham xD Very maknae line coded.

⤐ @lilmisssona - Sona, my sweet sonata, who is so sweet and supportive of me despite barely knowing me, it gives me diabetes. I already love her works, her AUs are very interesting. She also loves my two puppies, and I am only glad to provide her with photos and videos of them.

⤐ @minholing - Jenny, my lil biologist sprout. While she left, I will await her return here. Who knows, maybe by then I'll be able to accept her hugs more easily.

⤐ @kimistorm - We don't really talk, but we occasionally tag each other in some games. Her works are really nice and sweet, I wouldn't be surprised if she is like that too.

⤐ @miuracha - Miu, the legend amongst us. I haven't really gathered the courage to talk to her yet, but I do know she is an absolute sweetheart who only deserves the best. I hope life finally gives her a break, and very soon.

⤐ @silverstarburst - Silver, my star and guardian wolf, thanks to her protective nature over her friends. Our friendship started with her tagging me in a Jisung photoset, completely unprompted. That was a sign, so true that we now regularly talk here or on discord. Bless her and her gif/photo sets.

⤐ @galaxycatdrawz - A very active moot of Nat, someone who gave me even more meme ideas when I started memeing Nat, being the menace he is. Thus, he shall be named my official meme partner. While we don't talk regularly, that doesn't mean he isn't fun to be around.

⤐ @thatonedemigodfromseoul We haven't really talked a lot so far, but that is how it is when you just meet someone.

⤐ @dean-a-mean-tae Ah, yes, sweet Ronnie, who likes to sing my praises, even though I am average at best. No, please, don't look at me like that guys, I'm sorry- We have this mouse and cat game where we compliment the other in an endless cycle. Also let me tell you, when I first saw that they mentioned me, saying how good my silly fics are, I just sat in front of my screen like a confused and emotional dumbass. Definitely will remember that day for a good while, haha. I look forward to getting to know them better, if life allows it.

If I didn't tag you here, that either means I am way too nervous to do so (you're probably a big writer blog), or I just straight up forgot with my smooth, pea-sized brain. Please do reach out to me, I assure you I didn't mean to somehow offend you.

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[natsaffection]

Hellooo, how are u? Hope you’re okay ;)

You said we could send request so… i was thinkin if you could write one(before chapter 4, when they were still following the contract, in one of the date nights) where reader is making like a nice christmas dinner(a little late, sorry) and nat comes home and they have a nice time please ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

If you want, you could also have nat showing reader a new toy at the end🫣

Thank you so much, i love sugar mommy nat

Pairing: Sugar Mommy!Natasha (37) x Sugar Baby!Reader (21)

First of many! Thank you so much for requesting. I got a little carried away at the end. Hope you Like it!

The others will come in the next few days. Get ready for something sweet..

(っ◔︣◡◔᷅)っ <3

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MINOR DNI!! (18+!)

Summary: Your and Natasha's first Christmas, where the presents lead to more.

warnings: self made food, stress on work, sex toy use, begging, Mommy kink, Overstimulation

Word count: 2754

You wanted to be with Natasha over the holidays to celebrate a pleasant holiday with her. However, you quickly found out that she was absolutely not a fan of Christmas.

You woke up early in the morning to an empty bed and found only a note saying that Natasha would be back in the evening. She tried to stay away from Christmas by all means, because as she pointed out, 'she is bad at family things'. Still, you wanted to give her a little joy.

You knew from your recent visits to Natasha's company that everything was pretty cheerful. Even though she was the boss, she had a lot of work and was almost always stressed. 

Because she then let it out on you.. may be well noted.

So you wanted to do something good for her this time. It is after all a special day. So you set out and look around her apartment. She must have something here that she would like...Maybe some hobby or something.

However, you found nothing..You go dejectedly to the kitchen where, Sarah is already waiting for you.

"Good morning, Ms. L/n! Any request for breakfast?" You sit down and just mumble, "No, thanks..." Sarah continued to look at you, smiling broadly, "Okay. Let me know if you need help with anything." You see her want to leave until you thought of something,

"Wait! There's actually something..." What could be more romantic than a dinner?

"Yes please?" You stand up and walk over to her, "Can you tell me what Natasha always orders from you? By that, I mean, is there any dish that she likes..."

You saw her start to think... "Well, what would make her happy would definitely be homemade sandwiches! But I don't think that's what you want, is it?"

Sarah knew what you were up to. "Exactly...I want it to be something...nice. Not stuff you can do in three minutes." You were uncomfortable and looked down at the floor. Sarah, on the other hand, just had to smile. "Of course. Just follow me."

Your eyes lit up, again and you followed her into the kitchen. She told you and showed you everything you needed, and since Sarah was so amazed at your Idea, she wrote down the recipe herself, so you wouldn't have to struggle around in the cookbook for hours. You were more than grateful and went straight to work. You had a time frame for when Natasha would be back, but you didn't know how hard this was going to be.

And it was definitely hard. Fuck, you almost set the kitchen on fire. But! It was definitely worth it. It smelled fantastic and still looked perfect at the same time. When you got your hands perfectly dirty, you had also thought about how you could top your gift. And then you thought of the most perfect one. You. 

So you went back over to your dressing room and put on another revealing lingerie pair. You admire yourself in the mirror and wow. Natasha will definitely like it. 

You had thrown another hoodie and jogging pants over you, so it wouldn't be immediately obvious....

So you were ready and just had to wait for the guest.

Which also arrived a little later.

And Natasha was actually stressed again. Despite the holidays, the company was literally on fire. 

She threw the keys into her bowl and stopped in surprise when the smell of her favorite dish hit her. Her thoughts came up like: Where does Sarah get off making it just like that? She knows exactly what Natasha holds over the day. 

So she storms into the kitchen and stopped a little later when she saw you behind her counters.

"Y/n? What's this?"

You make your way over to her, "I know you don't like Christmas much, but I still have a few things for you..."

You were now standing in front of her, and she was staring at the kitchen and back at you, "You made this?"

"Yes..I hope you like it..."

"Do I like it?"

Oh, shit..You were too fast..She doesn't like it. She's going to-"

"I love it." You look at her with wide eyes, "Really?" She smirks at you, lifts you up and sits you on the counter, causing several empty pots to fall,

"I didn't know you could cook, Kotenok..."

You look to the side ashamedly, Well...I can't, but I had some help at first."

"That's why it smells burnt in here?" You had to laugh. "Well..I had to find my way around your kitchen first.." 

Natasha had to admit that she more than liked that. You just took time out of your day to make her something to eat? For several hours? 

"I hope it will taste good..."

"It will. Simply because it's already yours." She kissed you and together you prepared the table. You insisted that you serve her the food, and she accepted with a grin and amusement. You served it and you started to eat. You were genuinely surprised by your own skills, as it really didn't taste bad.

"Maybe I should hire you full time as my new cook." She said it so seriously that you was shocked for a moment, "That was a joke Y/n.." You sigh out, 

"Th-that I knew! How was work today?" Natasha shook her head and poured herself a glass of wine, "I don't know what people think to call in sick for the days. They really think I'm completely stupid." You could hear her demeanor getting more serious, "You're not. Okay?" She gulped down the wine and smiled again,

"I know. Thanks though..I still don't get it. They know all the stuff that's attached to my business, and they just leave it like that? I mean, we got it done today, but what if we didn't? There could have been so much money down the drain!" You knew where this was going,

"So back to interviewing," you laugh, poking Natasha. "And how. Full of idiots..."

You both finished eating, and it was actually pretty good..

"Please let Sarah cook again next time." HUH?! Your heart shatters into pieces, "Ow..Was it that bad?" You whimper and Natasha was sorry,

"No, no..Not so bad for a first time.." She only made it worse. She saw your frustration,

"Y/nnn..." But you ignored her, "Then you won't get your second present." Natasha sat back again in surprise, "Y/n, I told you, you don't have to get me anything. I have you and that's enough." Heh, if you only knew.

"Trust me..you'll like this one..." She continued to look at you, sighed as well and stands up,

"Okay, but mine first." She leaves without another word, and you had to drop your "angry" attitude. Natasha has a present for you?!

She came back with two bags. She sat back down and put one of the bags on the table and the other on the floor next to her legs.

"Here." You took it hesitantly. "That wouldn't have-" She held up a finger, "Don't say that. Now open it."

You looked inside and saw another small box with a bow around it. You took it out and opened it.

You could have thrown it away out of reflex, because you loved it so much. "H-How?!" In it were concert tickets of your favorite band, which were sold out after a few minutes.

"Well, as a Bussine's Woman, I'll give you a tip. Never leave tabs open on a laptop. I saw it and knew a few people for the event."

That was a lie. She found the site, yes. But she didn't know anyone. She looked on the Internet for people who had the tickets and offered them four time the price they paid.

You stood up, and the chair almost fell over. You threw your arms around her and she reflexively pulled you onto her lap. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" Natasha almost drowned in your kisses until she finally made you stop. "Anytime for you Y/n. So..ready for your second?" That's right, there was something. She bent down and picked up the other box. You took it again and opened it without much hesitation.

And now you were a red tomato. 

A new vibrator for Natasha's collection. "I saw it and immediately thought of you."

Natasha studied your reaction. You made it easy for her, though, when you stood up,

"Then it's my turn. Unpack me." She turns to you, "Unwrap you?" She had to chuckle.

You raised your arms and Natasha stood up and walked over to you, "What did my girl come up with, hm?" She took off the sweater, and you climb Simultaneity out of your pants until you were just standing there in the lingerie pair.

"Fuck, Detka..You didn't have to do that..."

You lean back. "For you always."

She looked you up and down and was on top of you in seconds. You jump up so she could just grab you and take you upstairs. 

You had a bit of a hard time getting to the top as you didn't leave each other alone for a second on the way.

Finally arrived, she puts you down,

"Kneel down and get your ass in the air." 

This is what you've been waiting for all day. Finally. 

Natasha could notice your desperation as you've never been on the floor so fast, "What a slut, look at the mess you're already making. Do you actually know how much this laminate costs?" You knew better than to talk, so you shake your head. "How could you anyway..Now then." 

You notice Natasha bending down to the level of your ass, as she plays with your new pink toy on your cheeks. She wanted to see you begging, "P-please..." came out almost like a whisper. "Who told you could talk to me anytime?" You answer with a whimper, bending your head even lower. 

Natasha didn't make it easy for you as she moved the tip of the vibrator over your hole, "Tell me what you want, princess" Your eyes widened, "Please put it in mommy, please." 

"Where? You aren't exactly short on choices here..." She was cruel.."In my pussy, please..." There was silence until you cried out a little as she finally pushed it inside you. You could feel it sticking halfway in you. After that, you hear Natasha get up and sit on the edge of the bed in front of you. "Look at me."

You did slowly, afraid of doing something wrong. To your surprise, you saw Natasha naked and could come right in front of her on the floor. "Do you like the view?" You nod like crazy, "Good." And then.. Natasha spreads her legs in front of you, "Get to work, little one." You forgot about your toy long ago when you saw Natasha's, shiny pussy in front of you. She was fantastic. You don't wait for long and almost fall into her. She lets out a breath as your mouth touched her lips, and you started licking her. 

You were so focused on doing everything right that a shock wave came over you as Natasha turns the vibrator to the medium setting. You groaned and had to gasp for air, "What are you doing? Did I tell you could stop?" She reaches out and slides you into her pussy again, leaning down to you at the same time, "You be careful, because if that beautiful thing falls out of you before I come, there will be consequences, understand?" You were about to reply, but were interrupted when Natasha set another level higher. You quickly get back to work, knowing how fast it always goes with you. "Look at this girl right here..like a starving dog, yeah.. Right there!" 

Those words gave you a purposeful work-out, however, Natasha was merciless as she pressed suddenly her foot against your own pussy. She wants to win. "Ngh, wait, I-It's gonna-" She kept pressing, and you tried to keep it inside you. But when you tried to close your thighs, the vibrations only got stronger. "Please, no!" And it went out. 

You only heard the plump thud on the floor and Natasha's sigh. "I told you..looks like it fell." You just whimpered. Despite the short time, you were so damn sensitive now. "Get on the bed Y/n.." You got up like a flash and in short order you were sitting on it, but not for long.

Natasha came over you like a gazelle and kissed you. You were so distracted by her that you didn't catch her laying you down and holding your arms up, "I took so long to put out this gift for you, and you just drop it like that?" She saw you were about to say something, "You have permission,”

"I'm sorry! But I couldn't help it.." You will say that often enough tonight... she thought to herself. "It's okay..I guess I'll have to help." You suddenly hear the vibrator again, "Keep your arms up there, or I won't hesitate to tie you up, do you understand?" 

"Y-Yes mommy..." And she set off. You literally jumped as Natasha placed the toy directly on your clit, "Let's see how long you can hold out this time." 

You squirmed in all directions, sure you were going to have muscle hangover in your arms the next day, so tightly you pressed them into the mattress to keep from swinging in the air, "Is my little girl having a hard time with that?" You nod like crazy, "Not hard enough.." And she raises, "Ah! Please! To-" 

And up another step. Now you couldn't take it anymore and were about to thrust your hands against the vibrator until Natasha grabbed them on the way and put them back. This time, though, she held them tight. 

"What was that about, huh?"

"I can't!!! Too much!" You cried. "Then you should have tried harder earlier..I gave you the chance, Y/n." You felt the knot. "I-I'm coming..." She continued to hold on, "Go ahead, but I'm not going to stop. Not until the whole battery is empty." 

Your first orgasm was enough for you, and you were able to breath as Natasha took it off. Not for long though, as she was now pushing it into you. "F-FUCK!" Natasha looked at you, "What was that?" Her grip on your hands tightened, "Did you just curse?" You just sniffed, "I can't help it! Please..." 

She didn't give you an answer, just gestures as she turned it on again. It was a weird feeling to not only have it inside you, but at the same time to have it vibrating against your walls. "Please-Mommy-. too..Too much.. " you whimpered, "That's not my name Y/n.." In the room, only your moans and the muffled sounds of the vibrator could be heard. You couldn't help yourself and came completely over her.

"Come again." And you did. 

"Again." And you did.

"C-come..n ---" You tried to counter it somehow, but Natasha kept you in her hold, "Hold still."

"PLEASE!!!" 

"Are you coming again? Go ahead." You shake your head and were forced to let go. But she didn't stop, "You know the safe word, and you can use it anytime. I won't be mad if you do it, I promise." And she pushed it out and back in. "Look how your pussy is enjoying it.. My pussy, you are doing great. Give me another one.."

"No..." You breath out. "Oh yes you will, color?" You were going to stop.. Were you? You don't know, you feel too good right now to think straight, "G-Gre-en-" Again, you start breathing heavily as she

increases her speed, 

"Please, please..." You shake your head and Natasha had to smile, "I'm here Y/n..comon." She was absorbed in the sounds you were making. Your screams were already bordering on animals, so fucked out you were and now you had to prepare for it for the sixth time.

"It's getting harder to get in..Come now or I'll do this to you all night," 

"MOMMYY!!!" Natasha followed your movements and kept you in place as you slowly came down from the trip. 

"There she is. Perfect Y/n..I didn't thought you would last this long..." You wanted to confirm, but your mouth was so dry and light at the same time.. You were briefly sure you had no more at all. But Natasha made it wet again as she pulled you into a kiss. 

"Merry Christmas baby."

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[foxes-that-run]

Snow on the beach

Taylor said SOTB is about falling in love in a "cataclysmic, faded moment" at the same time and asking if it is really happening. SOTB is rare love song on Midnights that references an ex and 1989. it’s I Wish you would set later with Harry.

Lyric video

The lyric video recreates the 1989 Rolling Stone shoot, which she previously did in part of the End Game music video that also references Harry. In End Game this refers to "I don't wanna hurt you (I just wanna be) / Drinkin' on a beach with (you all over me)".

All for you like Janet

An 80's icon (a la 1989), Janet was going through a divorce from a low-profile/secret marriage when she wrote All for You. All for you is about sexual liberation of being newly single. Taylor and Joe's long low-profile relationship was ending when SOTB was released, we hadn’t seen Joe much for a year, they walked in NY on release day and never again. The split was announced 5 months later.

Literal Snow on a beach

On 29 December 2011 Taylor posted a photo on a beach with light snow behind her. The shadows on her hair show the sun was either setting or rising inland. It's most likely in the afternoon on a western coast. It snows on the beach in NJ, but that would be very early in the morning and hadn't snowed that year. It did snow on the beach in Liverpool that year, 50 minutes from Harry Styles family house where he was that day. Taylor hadn't been seen for 2 weeks before this photo. See more in 2011 timeline.

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A post shared by The Old Taylor Swift (@theoldtaylorswiftinsta)

Lyrics

[Verse 1: Taylor Swift] One night, a few moons ago I saw flecks of what could've been lights But it might just have been you Passing by unbeknownst to me Life is emotionally abusive And time can't stop me quite like you did And my flight was awful, thanks for asking I'm unglued, thanks to you

The opening verse we have lights passing her unbeknownst to her, reminding us of him driving past her house in wish you would at night, and Style/HYGTG when he picked her up at night. She’s wishing for him.

‘Life is emotionally abusive and time can’t stop me quite like you did’ “you did”, we’re talking about an ex driving by. Time is no match for her feelings for the muse, it’s been years and she’s still dreaming of him. 'Life is emotionally abusive' because she’s not moved on despite her efforts to have a new life.

Finally, the flight tells us she and the muse are apart, UK/US or with tours, but she doesn't mind she is unglued at the thought of being with her 'cataclysmic' muse (...her calamitous love. ;))

[Chorus: Taylor Swift, Taylor Swift & Lana Del Rey] And it's like snow at the beach Weird, but fuckin' beautiful Flying in a dream Stars by the pocketful You wanting me Tonight feels impossible But it's comin' down No sound, it's all around Like snow on the beach x3

'Weird, but beautiful and dreamlike' depict the joyous feeling of your desire being reciprocated. She's longed for this person so much she's unglued at the idea that it could actually happen after all the time that passed in verse 1.

'No sound' is also similar to 'you can hear it in the silence' from 'You are in love' which is a beautiful moment. In 'You are in love' she sang that you could tell it was love without words, as here. However, we know the absence of those words haunts them, here's hoping for a good post-beach-fireworks chat.

Harry’s leaked Trouble also refers to snow in an unexpected, beachy place “It never snows in Hollywood / But when we sang it showed us that it could”

[Verse 2: Taylor Swift, Taylor Swift & Lana Del Rey] This scene feels like what I once saw on a screen I searched "aurora borealis green" I've never seen someone lit from within Blurring out my periphery My smile is like I won a contest And to hide that would be so dishonest And it's fine to fake it 'til you make it 'Til you do, 'til it's true

I searched "aurora borealis green" and lit from within and blurring out her periphery are references to Harry's green eyes and the magnetic presence she has sung about in other songs.

In the later released 1989 Vault track Suburban Legends his phone caught her peripheral vision. In Snow on the Beach she's so blissful to be back together she's putting past insecurities aside.

She goes on to resolve to let herself be in this blissful moment, get out of her own way and let her feelings be known. She ends with faking it till you make it. I read that as her seeing and setting aside her insecurities until she is confident and feels secure.

I (I) can't (can't) speak afraid to jinx it I (I) don't (don't) even dare to wish it But your eyes are flying saucers from another planet Now I'm all for you like Janet Can this be a real thing? Can it?

Taylor cannot believe that this person she has desired for so long feels the same, she can't dare to dream about it. Finally, she is all for him like Janet - aka feeling sexually liberated after getting out of a long secret/low profile relationship.