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lovelytsunoda · 1 year

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proud mary // han lue

summary: now living a quiet life with their daughter, han and y/n reflect on how they got there, and all the good moments that are still yet to come.

pairing: han lue x wife! reader

warnings: this is a big one so listen up: mentions of post pregnancy mental illness, mentions of pregnancy and starting a a family, weddings, ignoring tokyo drift canon because I fucking can, (actually I ignored a lot of canon) han is about to activate a shit ton of daddy issues

I left a good job in the city, working for the man every night and day and I never lost one minute of sleeping, I was worrying 'bout the way the things might've been.

big wheel keeps on turning, proud mary keeps on burning. and we’re rolling, rolling, rolling down the river

2009, tokyo, japan.

the garage was dark, lit only by the moonlight and the small lamps atop the workstations. han lue had closed up hours ago, and everyone was gone save for him and his lover.

“han, what are you doing?” y/n laughed, sitting at a table scattered with nail polish bottles and a shellac brisa light. “it looks like a smudge.”

“it’s a drifting car!” han laughed, staring through the large magnifying glass that was allowing him to see the design he was attempting to paint on his lovers thumbnail. “see, there’s the spoiler and those are the headlights!”

friday night manicures had become somewhat of a tradition. y/n hated painting her nails with her non dominant hand, but she also didn’t speak enough japanese to venture out and get her nails professionally done. when she and han started dating, he offered to do it for her, easing the aggravation that sometimes came with doing mail designs yourself.

“well, now that you’ve pointed it out.” she laughed, kissing him on the cheek. “I love you.”

they had been together coming up on two years. two long, wonderful years. she was a mechanic and he was drifter, it was almost meant to be. she stopped him from getting himself killed, and in return, he loved her unconditionally.

they were sympatico like that. she loved his sense of humour, his protectiveness. he loved her smarts and the excited way she talked, animatedly and with hand gestures.

“what do you say we get out of japan for a bit?”

han should have known this question was coming. y/n was a restless spirit, never meant to stay in one place for too long. in a way, han was as well. he could tell that his lover had been more restless than usual, either from missing home or needing a change of scenery.

“a friend of mine, his name is dominic torretto, he’s got this place down in the dominican republic.” han started slowly, unsure of how much he wanted to involved her in. y/n was his whole world, and what dom and mia would be running was far bigger than street racing in shibuya.“he called me the other day wondering if I would run a job with him. but it’s not entirely legal and I don’t blame you if you don’t want any part in it.”

“baby,” she frowned, placing her hand inside the blue light machine. “of course I’ll go with you. I never pass up a chance to go somewhere sunny, and you know that I’d go anywhere with you. what we’re running here with twinkie and sean isn’t exactly legal either, you know. I’m a big girl, seoul-oh. I can handle myself.”

“I know. I just want you to know what you’re getting into. you’re important to me, y/n.”

“I know.” she said softly, running her hand up his arm as she rested her head on his shoulder, gently kissing his neck. “so when does our flight leave?”

“whenever you want it to. I haven’t even bought the tickets yet. are you ready for an adventure?”

“fuck yeah.” y/n smiled, pressing her lips to his. “but you have to paint my other nails first.”

han laughed, the kind of laugh that would always set loose the butterflies in y/n’s chest, the kind that reminded her why she fell in love with him in the first place.

“I don’t think I have it in me to paint another drifting car.”

“then what are you going to paint on my thumbnail?” y/n laughed back, looking down at her nails and realizing that her lover had actually done a very good job painting a drifting car manicure.

“I don’t know,” han shrugged. he would deny it if asked, but he actually loved painting y/n’s nails. he thought it brought them closer together, built up intimacy in their relationship.

they were moments he wouldn’t trade for the world.

“I’ll just do like a checkered flag or something.”

“but you did that on my index finger!”

laughing, y/n turned her head to kiss him. “come on, you big dork. the sooner we get my nails done, she sooner I can model that new lingerie set I bought last weekend.”

“sold!” han laughed, knocking over bottles of gel polish as he searched for the bright pink he had used to paint the car on his girlfriends other hand. “drifting car? f1 car? whatever my gorgeous gorgeous girl wants.”

“I love you, han lue.”

“love you more, pretty girl.”

2010, monte carlo, monaco.

it was set up to be another sleepless night without her lover by her side, and y/n was having none of that as she wandered the deck of the comfortable yacht, looking around at the decorations that the crew had spent the day putting up.

she was just praying that it wasn’t going to rain.

nothing was about to spoil her big day.

she scurried below deck, past a half open door through which she could hear roman pearce’s guttural snores. fingers curled around the door knob, she tried not to make any noise as she eased the door open, slipping into the cabin.

“you couldn’t sleep either?” she laughed, looking at the king size bed where her fiancé lay, phone in his hands as he texted his mother, who the crew was picking up in the harbour in the morning before the ceremony began.

“got a lot on my mind.” han shrugged. “fucking tej won’t shut up about the reception and the playlist and I’ve told him a million times that it’s not going to be some crazy rave kinda thing.” the man sat up, gesturing for his soon-to-be wife to come closer. "it's doing my head in. seriously, he wants to do a club mix of 'i would do anything for love'."

y/n snorted. han thought she looked like an angel in the low cabin light, a halo glowing around her head and shining off her white silk pajamas, the ones with the tiny shorts and 'bride' embroidered on the butt. "how the fuck do you turn the best meat loaf song in existence into a club rave song?"

"the fuck if i know." han shook his head, hands sliding up her thighs as she came to stand in between his legs. "jagi, sarang-hae."

honey, i love you.

"mhm." she hummed, a smile on her lips as she leaned down to kiss him sweetly. "i love it when you speak korean. it's so fucking sexy."

the last year had been stressful. the dominican job had been way more complex than y/n had expected, and it took a while for han's old crew to warm up to her. it took a while, but eventually she managed to crack dom toretto, and two weeks later, han got down on one knee and asked y/n to marry him.

hence why they were on a yacht off the coast of monaco, the entire thing decked out in fairly lights and tulle.

"if you think tej is bad, you try getting in between letty and those large plastic ribbons on the back of the deck chairs." y/n laughed. "who knew letty ortiz was so serious about weddings?"

she was practically sitting on his lap now, head resting comfortably on his shoulder as the boat rocked back and forth.

han seoul-oh was her home. her safe harbour. she always felt safe in his arms, at his side, even when they were plunging into almost certain danger like they had in the dominican.

"i brought you something." y/n hummed, reaching into the pockets of her shorts and withdrawing the small cardboard packet.

"fake nails?"

"help me put them on? for old time's sake." she passed him the glittery white french tips, no doubt chosen to match her dress for the ceremony tomorrow.

"i can't wait to spend my life with you. and believe me, there will be plenty more manicure mondays."

2014, monterrey, california.

"daddy, where's mommy?"

"i don't think she's feeling well, poppy." han lue frowned, looking over at his daughter, who was perched in her little kiddie chair at the kitchen table. "i'm going to go check on her, okay? stay right here."

how do you explain depression to an infant? poppy jae-i han had been one of the best things to have ever happened to han seoul-oh. but in the almost twenty-four months since their bundle of joy had been born, something had felt off about his wife.

everyone hears about the mental health complications that can come with childbirth, but no mother ever thinks it would be her.

every husband fears it, too.

"y/n, jagi?" han tried to keep his voice level as he eased open the bedroom door. the couple had bought a ranch house in monterrey when they learned they were expecting. it was one of the few things they used their ill-gotten gains as a part of dom's crew for. "poppy's asking for you."

it broke his heart to see his wife like this, hair messed and greasy, red splotches under her eyes from where she had been crying.

"am i a bad mother, seoul-oh?" she asked, voice small. she seemed so tiny and fragile underneath the layers of blankets on the queen bed. "she always seems to cry when i'm around, but never with you. poppy loves you more than she loves me."

"what?" it was all han could do to stop himself from crying as he sat on the bed, gently running his fingers through y/n's hair. "sweetheart, what's brought this on? poppy loves you. you're her mom. she needs you."

"mia makes it look so easy." y/n sniffled, pulling herself up to a sitting position. she's lost weight. not a noticeable amount, or even an unhealthy one, but enough that her husband knows. there are many things that you can hide from the man you share your bed with, but han knows. he knows she's not doing well. "and i'm fucking shit at it, han."

"look at me, pretty girl." han encouraged, reaching for her hands. "you are such a good mother. i know you're struggling right now, and i know you're hurting but you need to know that poppy loves you so much. she was asking about you over breakfast, you know."

"i don't know who i am any more. i've lost my sense of self."

han frowned, brushing a few strands of greasy hair away from her forehead before leaning down and gently kissing her hairline.

"listen, i was talking to brian last night-"

"of course you were fucking talking to brian."

"-and he thinks you should talk to mia. they're passing through town today on their way back from dom and letty's, brian and i are going to take the kids out to the zoo or whatever, and you and mia should do something." he suggested, running his hand comfortingly up and down his lover's back. "go to the mall, get a coffee. i think she could really help you. she's been through this before."

y/n inhaled shakily, pulling away from han. "what if something happens to poppy and i'm not there?"

"y/n, everything is going to be okay. i promise. brian will be there, the kids will be in great hands. go do something with mia, darling. find yourself again, yeah?"

"okay." y/n nodded, still clutching his hand like it was her lifeline. "i can do that."

"mommy?" a small voice called. poppy had managed to get herself all the way from the kitchen to the master bedroom, where han had left the door ajar just in case poppy needed them. "are you okay?"

"oh, sweetheart, come here." y/n said, tears beginning to fall.

because how could she ever think that her little bundle of joy didn't love her as much as she did? poppy waddled over to the bed, and han hefted the toddler onto the mattress so that y/n could pull her close.

"you know that mummy loves you, right?"

"yes. i love you too, mommy."

"see." han smiled. "you're going to be okay. we're going to get through this."

2017, monterrey, california.

"i genuinely can't comprehend that roman pearce is getting married."

the family of three was walking down the nail care aisle at walmart, a welcome addition to their weekly shopping trip as y/n scanned the packages on the rack for a set of acrylic nails.

han laughed, one hand around his wife's waist and his chin on her shoulder as he leaned against the shopping cart. "it's not going to last. they may be getting married on saturday but i bet that by christmas roman is going to call and tell us she asked for a divorce."

"don't be so cynical." y/n laughed, kissing her husband softly before holding up a small white box. "do these go with my dress?"

"they'll go with anything, babe." han said, moving to whisper in her ear “they'd look even better wrapped around my c-"

"i want nails like mom's!" poppy han's shout cut him off, the little girl looking at the array of disney princess nails on the lower shelves.

laughing, han knelt down next his daughter, one hand on her shoulder. "which one do you want, princess? do you want frozen, tinker bell? mulan?"

"i want the ariel ones." poppy smiled, reaching for the pack of little mermaid nails. han helped her get them off the hook before lifting her up, carrying the six year old securely against his chest.

"seoul-oh, she's like six, you're spoiling her by carrying her all the time." y/n laughed, dropping both packs of nails in the cart.

"what, she's not heavy, sweetheart." han grins. "besides, i have to stay in shape somehow."

y/n rolls her eyes. "sweetie, it's bold of you to assume that you were ever in shape. but i loved you anyways, didn't i?"

back at home, they settled in the living room, near the large bay window. y/n watched contentedly from the kitchen as han sat at the coffee table across from poppy, delicately brushing nail glue across his daughter's tiny nails, dropping the glittery little mermaid nails on top.

it had taken a while to get to this peaceful, quiet part of their life, but y/n han was so glad that they had made it. that she had seoul-oh and that she had little poppy.

"be careful with your nails, they might come off. now, go get your homework done before we make the pizza, okay?"

poppy scurried off down the hall to her room, and y/n padded across the shag carpet, looping her arms around her husbands neck as she gave him a kiss.

"i'm so lucky, you know that. i'm happy and healthy again, and i have you and poppy. that's everything i could ever ask for." she said softly, resting her head against han's chest as the man tilted his head down, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of her head.

of course they both missed the good old days. the days of adrenaline and adventure. but brian and mia had left, and then y/n and han, and soon after was letty and dom. they were moving on with their lives, a chapter of glitz and glamour coming to a close.

"i want another one."

y/n froze, pulling back from her husband. "what?"

"i want another baby. and i know what we went through last time, and i fully understand if you're not willing to take that chance again, but god, y/n, i want a big family with you." han explained, holding his wife's hands. "poppy is growing up. soon she's going to be too cool for dear old dad. and then there will be boys-"

"or she'll be like you," y/n cuts him off with a laugh. "in which case there will be lots and lots of girls."

"god help us all. my little girl is going to break a lot of hearts one day."

"and you want another one?"

"honestly? yeah, i do."

"then i guess we'd better start trying. multiplication isn't that hard, so poppy's gonna be looking for us within the next hour." y/n hummed, kissing her lover softly.

han smiled against her lips, hands slipping into her jeans pockets to cop a feel of his wife's ass. "i only need half that."

TAGS:

@libraryofloveletters @magnummagnussen @mignonricciardo @sidcrosbyspuck @cartierre @monzabee @scuderiamh @daydreamingleclerc @diorleclerc @oconso @cl16version

#han lue x reader #han seoul oh x reader #han seoul oh #fast and the furious x reader #fast and the furious #tina: the series by lovelytsunoda #han x reader #han lue #sung kang #Spotify

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gojoswhitebabydolllashes · 1 month

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A multiversal wolverines mind and her declining sanity

Logan howlett x reader

DEADPOOL AND WOLVERINE SPOILERS!!!!

Warnings: major Canon divergence.

Cassandra's lair was made of the armoured corpse of Antman. Not exactly the most subtle lair on earth.

We stood as six before God knows how many, I knew we shouldn't have come. Logan knew it too, and secretly, I bet everyone else did too.

"Your all soooooo brave for coming back here" Nova taunted.

Her stupid fucking face pouted in faux. Stupid fucking bald headed bitch with stupid eyes and stupid clothes. Pathetic.

"I'd say your all so brave for not running away quicker" I stated.

In that moment, Logan pulled out both sets of claws and I had summoned my hand blade.

"Because we're about to fuck you all u-"

Before I could finish my sentence, I felt something protruding from my face, something like fingers. A hand crawled around my skull, invading my facial muscles.

It felt like Charles all over again.

"Your poor thing"

My memories began to zoom around my mind. Logan. Xavier. Scarlet witch. Loki. The TVA. Logan.

🧠

"Your not listening to me!"

I kicked and banged against the jail bars.

"LET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE YOU PATHETIC FUCK!"

They were going to find Logan. They were going to kill him.

'Aw, I don't think that's what we're looking for now, is it?' Nova laughed darkly ', let's look again, shall we?"

🧠

It was sunny today. Finally, the sun had shone. I held logans calloused hand as we watched our small dog, Felix, run around in the field. The grass was waving and emerald, the sun rays were golden and heavenly.

"You know Logan. If anything ever happens to you-"

"Ah," he put his finger on my mouth, silencing me instantly "nothing will ever happen to me"

Nothing will ever happen to me

Nothin

Nothi

Noth

Not

Will ever happen to me.

"AHHHHH!" I screamed as I impaled nova with my blade, holding her in the air forked through the stomach.

"You vile, vicious, pathetic little bitch!"

She could only laugh. Dark and vile.

The rest of her henchmen, or whatever the fuck she called them, gathered around us. I let novas body slide off my blade and thud on the ground.

"Youknowhowlongibeenwaitinfordis? Hooimboutamakanameformaselfere"

Again, I didn't know what the fuck gambit was saying. But oh was this gonna be fucking fun.

🧠

For some reason, I barely remember if i had any memories of logans memory loss. I know I was there. But what I did during it was information. Not even a mind reader could get out of me.

I remember, while working at the TVA, I met Doctor Stephen Strange. He was looking for a missing girl he said could travel across the multiverse.

Of course, no one believed him, but I remember seeing his face. Grey streaked beard. Classy red cape and blue robes. The time stone in his amulet. Something in me watched his panic, and I understood how we felt. I got it. I got that fear.

So I told him where she was.

And still to this day, no one at the TVA knows.

I was awake. That's all I knew. And I could move. I heard two different voices. I was lying on the grass, it was wet and cold but the air was warm.

One voice was that was of Wade.

Another of Logan

"Holy fuck balls she's awake!" Wade Gasped.

I sat up and got massive deja vu all over again. As I gained back my vision, I passed the blurriness, I first saw Logan and dare I say he looked mildly concerned.

"What the fuck happened?" I groaned loudly

"We were at bald Freaks lair and now we're in God knows where"

"Westchester," I said instantly.

I finally gained the strength to stand up and look around. "Were in fucking Westchester"

Wade looked around, while Logan looked at me and I looked at him.

"Why the fuck are we here?!" Wade threw his hands up in the air, acting defeated.

I turnt to Logan. "You alright?" He asked, not that he actually cared. "I'm fine" I replied "listen I think we've gone back into the past, in the time of the x mansion"

"Oh what the fuck?!" Logan grunted and punched the tree beside him, shattering it completely.

"So we're gonna find rolly polly here?" Wade put his hands on his hips.

Rolly polly obviously meant Charles.

"We just might yes"

#logan howlett x reader #logan howlett #wolverine #wolverine x reader #xmen #marvel #deadpool and wolverine

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an-idyllic-novelist · 1 year

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Buddha headcanons with Muichiro!fem!reader

warnings: spoilers, ooc, reader is aged up to early or late twenties.

In all honesty if Buddha did not have a love for sweets and cloud gazing, he would not have met his significant other: [First Name] [Last Name], the Mist Hashira.

Most of the gods were unaware that he even had a lover, and he planned to keep it that way. It was not because he doubted the Mist Hashira’s love and devotion towards him, rather he knew that the other deities would try something if he wasn’t around. Right now, they couldn’t afford to have too much attention on them.

By being in a relationship with a Demon Slayer who is sworn to never engage in a relationship with anyone belonging to the divine pantheons, Buddha had to tread carefully when he or both of them weren’t lounging underneath his bodhi tree. He might have Brunhilde’s blessing, but that would not stop Hades from trying to replace the Mist Hashira as soon as word got out that one of his rules had been broken.

After the Bifrost had been destroyed by the human named Nostradamus, the king of the underworld employed the Demon Slayer Corps to ensure the protection of Valhalla’s denizens. The organization had prided itself on being efficient and possessing powerful humans in their ranks who have gone toe-to-toe against Muzan Kibitsuji’s Twelve Kizuki, but presently they were running thin on available members due to a rise in demon sightings. That was part of the reason why [First Name] traveled frequently or stood guard in Helheim as soon she received a summons via her crow.

Buddha knew the job took a toll on her health, even if her face didn’t show it.

“Is it really a lot…to ask for more days like this?” [First Name] said one sunny afternoon, laying on flat on her back next to the honored one in the grassy field as she gazed up at the misshapen clouds shifting in the blue skies. “Being here on this little island, not worrying if your next assignment isn’t the one that’ll send you to Niflheim for good, or what you could have done but didn’t do?”

“It’s not, petal.” Buddha murmured, his calloused fingers weaving through [Hair Color] tresses before pressing a kiss on her forehead. “It’s not.”

Cuddles and meditation sessions are an absolute must once a mission is completed, no ifs, ands, or but’s. Mental health is important. Braiding each other’s hair won’t happen until much later on in the relationship, but it is definitely worth it.

This bond between two unlikely individuals took a long time to build, but the result is Valhalla’s chaotic power couple who adore each other and only show their vulnerable, softer side when alone. Like a pair of grumpy cats who don’t like anyone except for one person that gives them attention and treats when they want it.

Bonus Content:

Nothing warmed Buddha’s heart more than hearing his Mist Hashira talk shit to any god comes between them and a sweets shop. Especially when if she says ‘shaddup’ with that spaced off look on her face~.

Taglist:

@the-dumber-scaramouche

@deathmetalunicorn1

@thatstrangesheep

@radioactivesweet

@nixes-noxes

@staticradiotv

@myrisan-melodies

@rukia-writes

@kiannas-stuff

@yellow-snark

@nyxthehunterxdblog

@recreationalfanfics

@zodiacs-web

@onecantsimply

#shuumatsu no valkyrie #record of ragnarok #an idyllic novelist #ror x reader #snv x reader #snv buddha #fem reader #ror buddha #buddha x reader #muichiro!reader #buddha x reader headcanons #snv #record of ragnarok x reader

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winniemaywebber · 6 months

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The Apple Tree • part 2 🌳

2/7

read chapter one here

It's rainy in Thorpe Abbotts. Six planes go up, only five come back. Y/N worries about Rosie.

A familiar rumble distracts the class from their work, the scratching sound of pencils on paper ceasing almost immediately. Today, they had been sheltered from the graying drizzle of the village, much to their discernment. One look at their sad little faces pulled at your heartstrings, and the words “go on, then” had barely left your smiling mouth when they had all rushed to their cubbies to pull on their raincoats to protect themselves from the horrific weather.

Six had gone up, according to the second teacher down the hall who had happened to be on a tea break when she saw the planes ascend. You hadn't told your class the number, not wanting to potentially make their miserable day worse. You wondered if the weather had affected anything - whether the thick, black clouds full of raucous thunder had blocked their vision, the harsh wind causing them to break out of formation and bringing danger to themselves. And, in the back of your mind, you wondered about Rosie, hoping that he was safe.

It had been a couple of days since your last meeting, wherein you'd seen him taking a walk alone around Thorpe Abbotts, you spotting him as you rode home on your bike. You had waved nervously, precariously taking a hand off one of your handlebars to do so. Even from the opposite side of the road, you saw his face make a huge, beautiful smile, his baby blue eyes twinkling at the sight of you.

“Hi, Y/N. Wonderful to see you again.”

“Rosie,” you'd replied, your mouth also instantly bearing a grin at seeing him. “You, too. How was your weekend?”

“Ah, nothing special. I flew a practice mission, came back and wrote my mom. I try to keep her updated, she worries about me so, especially with me being so far away.”

“Oh, I understand. That's very sweet,” your heart melting at a man caring so much for his family. There is a pause as you keep smiling sweetly at one another, stuck for words due to being so excited at seeing each other again.

“So,” he breaks the silence. “Are you headed home?”

“Yes,” you sigh. “It's been a long day. It wasn't sunny enough to let the children play outside, and being cooped up drives them mad!” You laugh, hoping to diffuse the butterflies rising up in your stomach as he begins to offer to wheel your bike home so you can walk alongside him.

“I can imagine!” He responds, once again smiling in your direction as his eyes dart around, trying to get his bearings. A crack of thunder from above distracts him, his shoulders sagging with a sigh.

“We'd better hurry you home, ma'am.”

Running through the rain, you arrive at the cottage quick as a flash. “Come in and warm up by the fire,” you shout over the loud pattering of raindrops on your slate doorstep, both of you sheltering under the front door canopy.

“I'd love to, but I gotta get back to base. We have a briefing in the morning and I should get some rest.”

“Oh, of course. Well, thank you for walking me home again. You're great company.”

“You too, ma'am,” he smiles, exhaling through his nose with a slight giggle. “Are you doing anything Thursday afternoon?”

“No, I'm not,” you reply, the fastest answer that's ever left your lips. “I leave the school at around 2pm. You could meet me there? I could show you around a little. Bring your bike!”

“Oh, er–” he stutters, face turning red with embarrassment. “I haven't quite got to grips with that thing yet.” You try your best to stifle a giggle, shaking your head.

“I've heard you're the best pilot in the Army Air Force and you can't ride a bike?” You wink at him jokingly, his face now a cute shade of pink.

“Leave me alone, Y/N,” he pokes at you, his face however, still holding that beautiful smile.

“I'll teach you…if you'd like,” you say with a shrug. He nods, the color of his cheeks returning to normal. He reaches over and softly kisses your cheek, your hand coming up to touch it as soon as his lips break contact.

“Miss, I saw five come back,” Penelope says in a small voice. “How many were there?” Feeling your heart jump to your throat and your breathing become ragged, you try your best to maintain composure.

“I believe it was five, little one,” you respond, gritting your teeth into a reassuring smile. “Mrs Meldrum said five, but she was nose deep in the biscuit tin at the time. I'll ask her later, okay?” The wide eyed little girl nods and rushes back to her seat, pushing her round glasses up her nose as she sits down, once again ready to learn.

Getting through the rest of the day without making your unease obvious is an arduous task. Every time you think of Rosie, you feel your heart almost stop, feeling like a phantom hand has its grip around it, crushing it bit by bit. You find yourself taking a moment while the children are distracted to place a hand on your chest, willing your breathing to return to its usual pace, arguing with yourself for feeling so anxious over somebody you've met only twice.

To your surprise, you see your friend Sally outside as you corral the children out the door for home time, zipping coats and tying shoe laces as they rush out of the door into the cold drizzle. She's stood in a yellow rain coat, a black umbrella swaying slightly in the breeze.

“Sally?” You call. “Come in, doll.” A look of concern etched on your face, she runs in, dismantling her umbrella, a sob catching in her throat as she runs past you into the schoolroom.

“Oh, Y/N,” she wails, her pretty face crumpled. Her eyes are squeezed shut, black inky trails from her mascara shooting down her face. “Only five–” she stutters, before taking a deep breath to try and compose herself. “Only five came back…and–and I don't know if James…”

“Hey, Sal,” you murmur, pulling her into a tight hug, her wet raincoat against your skin causing you to shiver suddenly. “It's all going to be okay, just–” you pause, a hand on her cheek now. “Just be patient. He'll be knocking on your door tomorrow.” She nods, a small sob escaping her lips as she wipes her eyes. You hand her a small white handkerchief, embroidered with your initials. This seems to make her cry all the more.

“I still have the one your Granny made me,” she says as she dabs away the mascara lines. “Maybe I should start carrying it again.” You titter, exhaling as you do so.

“She gave them to us when we were, what, six?” You look at Sally inquisitively, and she nods. “And she made us promise to always stay friends. I'm not sure why she thought matching handkerchiefs would cement that, but…”

“I'm glad we did, though,” she laughs, sniffing.

“Me, too. Now, come on. You're about to freeze if we don't get you some place warm. I'll light the fire at home and you'll stay for dinner to take your mind off this.” You grip her softly by the shoulders. “He will be here tomorrow, okay?” But you're not quite sure who you're trying to reassure more: yourself or your best friend.

A restless night awaits you, tossing and turning in your bed as the moonlight peeks through your thin curtains. All you can think about is if Rosie and James are safe, the weight of your thoughts crushing your chest with every attempted deep breath. You fall asleep just as the sun is rising, and you wake feeling horrific. You pad to the bathroom to wash your face and brush your teeth, hoping going through your daily routine will bring some color back to your pale face and somehow, take your mind off things.

It's only when you pull your bike from against the wall of the cottage that you realize it's finally stopped raining for the first time in three days. You breathe in the fresh air, hearing the soft breeze blow through the leaves on the tree outside your gate as your eyes close softly. “Y/N!” you hear a voice call from down the lane. There, in his uniform, looking a little battered, is James. As he approaches you, you see he has a small scratch above his eyebrow and another gash upon his cheek.

“James!” You reply, extremely happy to see him. “You're here! Oh, Sally came to see me in such an awful state yesterday. We only saw five planes come back, and–”

“I'm headed there now,” he responds, interrupting your train of thought. He smiles brightly at you, and gives you a friendly wink. “Thank you for looking after her,” he says, softly. “I sure do hate worrying her but…it's just the way of the job.”

“I understand, James. I know. She just has such a big heart.” You begin to wheel your bike down the lane towards the school, waving a goodbye to James and trying your best to avoid asking the one question that kept you up all night. The temptation, however, is too much and you stop in your tracks.

“James?” You call after him. He turns but keeps walking, looking precariously behind him every few steps to avoid potholes and small ditches. “Is Rosie okay?”

“Finally!” He yells into the distance between you. “I was waiting for you to ask. He's fine, Y/N. Teach him how to ride that darn bike before he puts himself in the infirmary again!”

The day passes in a blink, which you think is mostly in part of you wishing the day away. The children leave in a gaggle of excitement, looking forward to feeling the warm sun on their sweet faces as they begin their short walk home, playing together all the while. As they disperse, you look out of the bay window and spot someone under the apple tree, reading, their brow furrowed in concentration. “Rosie!” you squeal, swing open the door and run towards him as fast as you can. He spots you immediately and stands up, just in time for you to fling your arms around him without second guessing yourself.

“Well, hi,” He murmurs, his face buried in your neck. You breathe a huge sigh of relief into him, your eyes squeezed shut.

“I didn't know if you were--oh, I was so worried about you,” you hold him a little tighter, wanting to make the embrace last a few moments more. “Oh, I'm so happy to see you, Rosie.”

“Likewise, Y/N,” he replies, reciprocating the tighter hug. You finally break apart, your hand finding its way to cup his cheek.

“Now,” you sigh, finally content. “Tell me why you can't ride this bike.”

He demonstrates, looking a little embarrassed when you see him begin to try pedal backwards.

“Hey, stop!” You call after him. “What are you doing?”

“I'm trying to stop the thing,” he laughs, but obviously frustrated.

“Darling,” you reply, the word just spilling out of you. “These–” you gesture to the long buttons just off the handlebars, “--are for stopping.” He rolls his eyes jokingly, comically slapping a hand to his head.

“Wow,” he says, a hint of sarcasm in his voice. “I guess I can ride a bike. You really are a great teacher, Y/N. Those kids are lucky.” You shove at him playfully, laughing at his tone, until he grabs your hand. “Seriously…” he pauses, his thumb stroking the back of your hand. “You're wonderful.”

Both balancing your bikes against the schoolhouse, you find yourselves under the apple tree, the sun just beginning to set. You had grabbed a spare blanket from the classroom, just in case the weather began to turn at a moment's notice which you knew was a terrible habit England possessed. Rosie places it around both of you and pulls you in close, your head resting on his shoulder. You close your eyes and exhale, contentedly, the rollercoaster of emotions from the past day finally leaving you in that breath, grateful and happy to have him here with you and safe for the time being. You reluctantly check your watch as he runs his fingers through your loose hair.

“You probably should get going,” you sigh, eyes a little sad. “It's late. I don't want you in trouble.”

“I can handle it,” he says quietly, his whole body relaxing underneath you. “Just a few more minutes, please. I just want to be a guy, watching the sunset with a pretty girl on my arm.”

chapter 3

masterlist

#masters of the air #mota #mota fic #masters of the air fic #rosie rosenthal #rosie rosenthal x reader #winnie writes

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moonlight-tmd · 7 months

Note

How about Bumblebee ships where Bee has a protective uncle who is pretty much cybertronian Doomguy?

Also, how would others react to it?

Ya know, i had an idea related to the one with Bee having a decepticon dad.

What if Elita and Bee were actually related?

Like, we all seen how similar these two are, from personality to looks, it would only make sense if they were family. I was thinking of attaching it to the idea of Bee having a 'con dad but let's see if i can cook up something different...

So, I suppose the way it happened is that Bee's parents died cuz war when he was a tiny bitty. Elita, being his aunt, took him in and raised him. Bee was too little to remember his parents so Elita did her best to tell him about them when he was older. Besides her, he didn't have any other relatives.

Then, one day Elita had to leave for some mission. She promised her nephew that she'll be back soon... but she never did. Bee was in the middle of trying pass academy. Elita hired Arcee to look after Bee when she wasn't present, when the news of Elita dying on a mission reached them Bee refused to believe. He knew Auntie Eli better than anyone, he knew that she wouldn't just perish like that. Arcee stayed with him until he was old enough to be on his own, she helped him get around in life to the best of her capabilities.

Bee tried to have a normal job like Arcee suggested but it just didn't sit with him. From all the stories Auntie Eli told him about being an Elite Guard he wanted to follow her pedesteps and become one too.

He got into boot camp and then- hell started. Bee was about to quit completely when he met Bulkhead and Longarm. Still, even with the newfound hope he got kicked out. Bulkhead was kind enough to pull him into the repair crew so he won't stay unemployed.

All this time alone Bee started to slowly lose hope to ever see his aunt again... that's until they crashed on Earth.

First year and few months were quiet but then Decepticons came. And wouldn't you know-

The fight was rather messy, at some point the structures on the demolition zone started to crumble and both parties had to run. Team Prime regrouped after the building fell and the 'cons were gone. Except Bee was nowhere in sight. They searched the entire place but there was no trace of him...

Bee woke up in dark place. His frame ached, made sense considering he remembered being hit with rubble while cornered by a giant spider. What he didn't expect was him laying in some form of medbay in a cave and said spider being the one tending to him.

He was quick to jump to his pedes and take a defensive stand. He demanded answers but the femme only told him to calm down and rest. She had that worried and hurt expression on her that Bee couldn't quite place... at least until she said one specific word.

"I wouldn't hurt one of mine, Sunny." She said at some point of their half-argument. Sunny- that nickname was only used by his aunt when Bee needed comfort.

"Wai- h-how do you..?" Bee's Spark seemed to have a seizure as he tried to comprehend what she just said. She only gave him that small kind smile- an expression that gave Bee a painful realization. "...Auntie Eli?"

She nodded and Bee could only run to her and hug her as tight as her could and cry. They talked, Blackarachnia told him vaguelly where's she's been and what she did in all these years, but she never quite told him why she was a spider- all she said was that it was an accident on a mission. Bee felt so sad for her, she went thru so much all alone. He caught onto the little mention of how ugly she was when she was talking and comforted her- she was his aunt always and forever. He even changed the little nickname 'Auntie Eli' to 'Auntie Ari' cuz her name changed.

After she patched Bee up she took him outside. She told Bee to not tell anyone about it so when he came back to base he lied saying that 'cons captured him but he escaped. The others bought it.

And so Bee sneaks out sometime to go visit Blackarachnia. Sometimes they stay hidden and talk, sometimes they go somewhere far to have fun. Sometimes Bee brings her gifts to use or decorate her not-so-little cave-house. One thing about having an aunt who's a scientist is that she can fix you up like a medic, Bee most often goes to her if he has a crash while doing something behind others' backs. Blackarachnia is the type to care about whether he won that race rather than what he did is illegal, spares Bee hearing a scolding for Primus-knows-which time.

They tried to keep the enemy charade going- despite her going rogue on Megatron, she still hated Optimus and his bunch. That's until one particular fight when Starscream showed up- she was hididng from them cuz some stray organic reported suspicious activity and Star showed up out of nowhere and started fighting them. He threw Bee off a tall building, before others had a chance to do something Blackarachnia swooped in spiderman-style and caught him. Starscream fled and she lowered Bee to the ground and started looking over him to injuries, before others got too close she also fled.

Once they got back to base they were wondering what has happened, in their talk trying to figure out why Arachnia would save Bee, said scout slipped.

He ended up spilling that Blackarachnia is his aunt- of course, she used to behave and look different. He told them that she was supposedly dead but he knew better and hey, it was true! She may not be the nicest person now but she's still family.

I suppose Ratchet would still be suspicious of her cuz he heard what kinda shit she can pull.

Bulkhead has heard the full story of Bee's aunt going missing long ago- he's happy that Bee finally found her but at the same time he's kinda worried cuz she is kinda evil.

Sari is happy for him, she feels bad for the gal but she's mostly happy for them to have found each other. She did ask Bee to take her for a visit but he always said he'd have to ask his aunt first. She may have gotten to meet her one time, it was quite a fun.

Optimus... he feels all shocked, stupid and guilty- Elita never told him nor Sentinel about having a nephew. When he first saw Bee he instantly got remined of Elita, he was also the reason she went missing in the first place... he couldn't look Bee in the optic after that.

I think he would give in and tell Bee. He's ask him to speak privately outside and he'll tell him he knew Elita when they were younger. That they went to the same academy, they were on the same team... that he was on a mission with her and something went wrong and he couldn't help her in time. It didn't matter if Bee hated him afterwards, at least he'll take this weight of keeping it a secret off his Spark. To his surprise, Bee wasn't mad at him. In fact he was sympathetic towards Optimus and even asked if he knew anything more about her. They spend the evening talking about Elita and how she used to be, Bee even said some stuff about her new self from the times he snuck out to hang out with her.

So now that the information is out in the open, Bee doesn't have to hide if he wants to go see his aunt. I think at some point, Bee would ask if he can let her come over for some holiday or something. The others are wary at first but Bee told them she's not gonna do anything- Bee told them that she said 'she won't bother them if they don't bother her' and so far she's been sticking to it. No more trouble from her side. It would be very awkward for Optimus tho- like, imagine if she came over for christmas and it was just this tense atmosphere around the two- at least until Bee brings out the drinks and they start to chat... Bee did not know they used to date in academy. "What others do with their lives is not your business... also, you were too young to know this stuff." Arachnia said when Bee argued why she didn't tell him.

I think at some point Elita Guard would visit and also learn the fact Bee is family with her. Sentinel is on the first fire- Arachnia has heard enough of what he pulled with her dear nephew to want to kill him, and keep reviving him just to keep killing him again and again and again. In the end he only got slammed into the wall and nearly decapitated with a threat of making him go to the deepest of Pits if he ever hurt Bee again. Oh, and she also told him she's Elita before that to add to the injury.

Jazz and Jettwins are kinda scared of her, she can be fun but she can also kill you if you make a wrong move so...

As for the ships reactions- Prowl would be worried cuz Blackarachnia is not someone to play with- but she was Bee's aunt and she did save him so maybe she's not as evil? He tries to stay positive for Bee's sake but he always has an optic on her just in case. (If he wasn't dating Bee he'd be just worried for Bee's safety.)

ShockBee- Blackarachnia knows Shockwave. Shockwave knows Blackarachnia. If she learned that Bee and Shock are dating(when he's disguised) she would take him when no one is looking and threaten to do him worse than Blitzwing if he tried anything with her nephew. Being a double agent also meant a treacherous relationship with someone of the opposite faction, she's not gonna take chances and let Bee become his toy. She'll even make him break up with Bee if need be. Shockwave's processor is working on the highest setting, trying to come up with a solution to make peace with all he got going on in his life. Bee thinks Longarm is scared of his aunt but in reality he's actually scared not knowing what to do.

And finally, BlitzBee. I think Blitz would find out way sooner than the others- meaning that Blackarachnia caught Bee alone in the forest just before Blitz arrived at the meeting. Yeah, they tried to kill each other but Bee managed to calm them down to talk. Both were alarmed and confused that the other talked to Bee like they knew each other...

Blitz was shocked when he heard the same person that messed up his processor is his beloved's aunt. Arachnia was more disappointed and worried than angry but she still hid it behind anger. Blitzwing wasn't the best mech and she didn't want Bee getting hurt by this unstable scrapheap... yeah Bee was not having a good time.

Somehow they all made it out alive and Bee got a little bit of alone time with Blitz. Next time Bee was visiting his aunt of course she demanded answers- Bee assured her that Blitz is good to him and won't do anything to harm him.

Blitz on the other hand felt a bit betrayed that Bee didn't tell him but at the same time he understood why. All of his personalities could not have had a harder time existing with one another... In the end he couldn't stay mad at him for having a family so it was all good.

I think Bee would try to get them to ease up so he tries to get them to hang out more like family. It kind of works? There's still some bitterness towards one another but at least they can talk without making it into an argument.

If the others find out about Bee and Blitz, Arachnia would and will force them to let Bee have a relationship and do some not nice things if they don't.

She may be smaller than most of them but she's definitely someone you DON'T want to mess with. She has ways of making folks suffer more than they can imagine and she will do them if it means protecting her only joy in life that is Bee.

I really like the side idea of Optimus making peace with Elita-now-Blackarachnia and them getting back together. Optimus is just trying to be a good uncle and Bee making it an experience to remember (bad) for his amusement. They grow to like each other tho.

#maccadam #tfa #ask box #tfa bumblebee #tfa elita one #long post #blitzbee #prowlbee #shockbee

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prettygirl-gabi · 3 months

Text

Can I have this dance

---

Rating: General Audiences

Warning: fluff

Category:F/M

Fandom: SEVENTEEN (SVT) (boyband)

Relationships: !College student Wonwoo x !College students f reader

Summary:

Trope: she fell first;he fell harder

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Hiiiii everyone who is reading! Welcome to the sixth installment of my new mini series called "Oi! Not this again!" They do not have to be read together or in order! I hope you all enjoy!

---

The first time I saw Wonwoo, he was absorbed in a book, tucked into a corner of the campus library. It was one of those rare sunny days between relentless storms, and everyone was outside; everyone but Wonwoo. I suppose that’s what caught my attention first—his quiet defiance of the beautiful weather.

I remember staring a bit too long, marveling at his unbothered concentration and the way his glasses slipped down his nose slightly as he leaned into the text. I didn’t realize I was blocking the aisle until someone bumped into me, sending us both stumbling.

“Sorry!” I blushed, catching myself on a nearby shelf. As I straightened up, my eyes met Wonwoo’s curious, slightly amused gaze.

“No problem,” he said, his voice a calm counterpoint to the fluttering in my chest. “Find anything good?”

“I, uh, I was looking for a book on ancient history.” It was a lie, rather embarrassingly, as I held up a random novel I’d grabbed to cover my ogling.

“Interesting,” he mused, pushing his glasses up. “That’s actually a fantastic read if you’re into dark fantasy. But for ancient history, you might want to check the next aisle over.”

“I’ll do that, thanks.” I hurried away, heart pounding a little less with each step away from the encounter. Little did I know, that was just the beginning.

---

It wasn’t long before I saw him more often, and I made it a habit to visit the library—rain or shine. Our paths crossed enough times that by our fourth encounter, we were on a first-name basis. By the seventh, I had gone from casual ‘hello’s’ to seeking out his company amidst the stacks.

“You really like that seat, don’t you?” I teased one day, leaning over the table where he was predictably settled.

He looked up, the faintest of smiles on his lips. “It’s got a good view.”

“Of what? Dusty books?”

“Of interesting people.” The way he said it with such straightforward honesty left me flustered, and he chuckled softly at my reddening cheeks.

“Well, be careful. You might go blind squinting through all that dust.”

“If that’s the case, I’ll just let it happen slowly,” he quipped, eyes sparkling behind his glasses.

---

Over time, our banter became a comfortable routine. I fell for his quiet wit, the effortless intelligence in his words, and how he seemed to notice the little things about me that no one else did. I, Y/N, the girl who fell first—without even realizing it was happening until it was too late.

I think he noticed how I’d linger around him, doing my homework at his table or asking his opinion on random topics just to hear his voice. But if he did, he never showed it, and that left me in a constant state of anticipation—a wonderful sort of torture.

---

It was during one of those infamously rainy days that our routine took a turn. I was running late, making a mad dash across campus, drenched and out of breath as I finally burst into the library. Wonwoo looked up, eyebrows raised as I skidded to a stop beside him.

“Well, look who’s turned into a drowned rat.”

“Thanks… for the… observation,” I huffed, trying to wring out my jacket and catch my breath.

“Here.” To my surprise, he pulled out a spare hoodie from his bag. “Take this. You’ll catch a cold.”

“Are you always this prepared?” I teased, accepting his offer with gratitude.

“Only when I know you’re coming.” His words were smooth, but there was a sincerity in his eyes that sent warmth pooling in my chest.

We spent the next few hours in companionable silence, broken by occasional laughter and shared thoughts. But as the library announced its closing, I groaned, realizing I’d have to face the downpour again.

“Hey Wonwoo, got another spare jacket in there?” I joked, standing up and looking out at the torrential rain through the glass doors.

“Not exactly.” He stood, slipping on his own jacket and tucking his book under one arm. “But I have an umbrella.”

Despite the rain, the walk back to our dorms was strangely peaceful under the shared cover of his umbrella. The campus, shrouded in mist and the soft rhythm of the falling rain, felt intimately ours.

“I love rain,” I admitted, feeling bold under the cover of the night. “Everything feels so alive, so… full of possibilities.”

Wonwoo tilted his head, studying me with that penetrating gaze of his. “Do you dance in it?”

“What?”

“You said it makes you feel alive. Do you ever dance in the rain?” His question was so unexpected that it left me speechless for a moment.

“I… I’ve never tried. Have you?”

“Not really. But there’s a first time for everything.”

Without warning, he stepped out from under the umbrella, holding a hand out to me as the rain quickly soaked his hair and clothes. I stared, heart skipping a beat.

“Come on, Y/N. Let’s dance.”

I hesitated only for a second before taking his hand, the umbrella forgotten on the ground as he pulled me into the rain. Laughter bubbled out of me, our hands intertwined as we awkwardly spun and twirled, stumbling over invisible puddles and each other’s feet. Wonwoo’s deep, melodic laughter mingled with mine, his carefree grin making my heart do somersaults.

It wasn’t a graceful dance, more an exuberant, joyful mess, but it was perfect. The rain was cool against our skin, the world around us blurring until it felt like there was nothing except us and the moment.

Eventually, breathless and soaked through, we stopped, standing close enough to feel each other’s warmth despite the chill. His eyes, usually guarded, were soft and open in a way that made something inside me flutter.

“Y/N,” he murmured, tucking a wet strand of hair behind my ear. “I think I’m falling for you.”

My breath caught, eyes wide as I stared up at him. “Wonwoo…”

He gave a small, self-deprecating smile. “I guess I fell harder, huh?”

Our laughter filled the night again, and as his arms circled around me, drawing me into a tender kiss brushed by the rain, I knew we’d found something extraordinary in each other—a love that, like the rain, was refreshing and endless.

---

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-Thank You For Reading!🩵🩶

-prettygirl-gabi🎀✨️

#kpop #seventeen #oneshot #support the writers!#svt imagines #mini series #seungkwan #seventeen ambw #svt scoups #svt #woozi imagines #seventeen jeon wonwoo #wonwoo #wonwoo comfort #wonwoo x reader #wonwoo x you #wonwoo x y/n #Gabi writes

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thebiggerbear · 6 months

Text

i need your hand but i don't want to burn it - One - She's Gone

A/N: Not going to lie, this past month has been a tough one for me. I recently lost someone and it just sucked all of the energy out of me for writing or anything else. I started this back on Feb 16th, within hours of receiving the news, because I was trying to process it as well as my feelings on it all. Beau was in my mind from the very beginning because like I mentioned before, I literally had the thought "Man, I could go for a Beau hug right about now." So this took form and even though I was blocked on everything else, this became a sort of tool of processing for me. I was going to keep this just for myself because I found it to be deeply personal, but then I thought, well, what if someone out there is also currently grieving someone they lost and a little Beau comfort might make them feel better, too? Even in this scenario? So that's why I'm sharing it.

While it is personal what I go into, I changed up things to keep it fictional and sort of tell a story. So the characters and dynamics are fictional, just not the feelings of the reader and the emotional journey/grieving process she goes through if that makes sense.

Unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine. I attempted the graphics.

Song that randomly came out of nowhere and strangely worked was "broken" by Jonah Kagen. The lyrics just really hit home for me.

Warnings: mention of death; death notification

Word Count: 8587

Taglist: @avada-kedavra-bitch-187; @rieleatiel

Beau Taglist: @deans-spinster-witch; @birdiellie; @heartlessdelusions; @nancymcl; @illicithallways; @muhahaha303

This part was recc'ed by @winchestergirl2 here.

It was a bright, sunny day when you got the news. The sky was this unimaginable shade of blue, not a cloud in the sky, and the temperature was a comfortable one. You were on the job and the slight breeze ruffled through your hair when you saw that your aunt was calling you. A knot immediately formed in your stomach; if she was calling you, that couldn’t be good. And sure enough, it wasn’t.

“She’s gone,” she informed you matter-of-factly.

It took a moment for your brain to catch up to what she was telling you. “What?”

“She’s gone, Y/N. Happened this morning.” Again, her tone was bland, as if she was simply telling you a package had been delivered to your home.

“How?” Your mind felt as if it was running in circles but also slowing down at the same time.

Poppernak’s head snapped in your direction but you immediately walked away from the scene. You didn’t notice the deputy watch after you and then head in Hoyt’s direction.

“Stroke.” Your aunt was only willing to give you one word but that one word changed your entire world. It altered the landscape of your universe in a big way.

You nodded, forgetting that the woman couldn’t see you, and you felt a lump start to form in your throat. You forced your gaze onto some trees ahead and mentally told yourself that you would not cry. “Oh,” you choked out. So much for not allowing any emotion to bleed through.

“Yep.”

Once again, very bland, almost dry. You weren’t surprised, though. It had always been like this between you. “Um…did they say when the services will—”

“Nothing’s set in stone yet but the information will be on the obituary online. It’ll probably tell people who can’t make it where to send flowers.” And just like that, the digs began.

You ignored her attitude and quietly cleared your throat. “Okay,” you attempted to smooth over. “I’m so sorry, Aunt Ida. If there’s anything you need, please call m—”

“Oh, I’ll call you, don’t you worry. But right now, as it stands, we’re good. I have to get going. I still have to get to the funeral home and make all the arrangements. I’ll be talking to you soon.” Before you could say goodbye, she hung up.

You let out a heavy sigh before lowering your phone from your ear. You focused on the trees once more, pushing any thoughts away and stuffing your emotions back down. When you felt confident enough that you wouldn’t break, you turned to find Hoyt and Poppernak watching you worriedly from near the crime scene tape. You sighed once more and then began your walk over to answer the burning questions they appeared to have.

You were driving back home on autopilot, lost in a sea of memories that forced a single tear out onto your cheek every now and then, prompting you to wipe each one away quickly. Your phone began to ring and as you expected, Beau’s name popped up. Well, that had to be some kind of record for Hoyt. Though, you supposed in these circumstances, you couldn’t blame her and you could appreciate her difficult position. She was only supposed to call Beau if there was an emergency but if she didn’t let him know that she sent you home for the rest of the day after receiving the news of a loved one’s passing, then she’d most likely be in hot water. In trouble with you or in trouble with Beau? It wasn’t hard to see why she made the choice she did.

Beau was on vacation and you hated for that to be interrupted, especially due to this. He worked his ass off every single day and he deserved this time. He had offered to take Cassie and Kai fishing and camping, after the date passed that the two were supposed to have gone with her dad who had been killed. Kai was excited and Cassie was grateful when Beau made the offer. You and Hoyt were happy for them. Beau had even tried to entice Emily to fly up for a visit and go with them, but Carla put a quick stop to that with the mention of school and it being Emily’s senior year. To say Beau had been disappointed was a massive understatement.

And now, he was most likely spending his time worrying about you alongside teaching Kai how to catch trout and attempting to keep Cassie laughing and her spirits high. You almost didn’t answer, because you didn’t want to be one more thing he had to worry about and also because you didn’t feel like talking, but in the end you did. To reassure him if for nothing else.

“Hey.”

“Hey,” he greeted back, sounding worried just like you had predicted. “You okay?”

You briefly closed your eyes in annoyance at Hoyt. Despite your initial understanding, this really wasn’t something she needed to call him about. Someone else, yes, but for you, no. “Yeah, I’m okay,” you reassured him. “Hoyt just thought it best that I take the rest of the day, clear my head, and come back fresh tomorrow. That’s all.”

A moment of quiet passed between you as he likely mulled over your answer. Accepting it, he then offered, “Do you need anything?”

You cleared your throat to keep the lump at bay. “Nope. Thanks, though.”

“If you don’t mind my asking, who passed?”

You pressed your lips together, not really wanting to answer, but he’d find out eventually. “My grandmother.”

Sure enough, his tone softened. “I’m so sorry, Y/N.” He knew how deeply this one would cut.

You swallowed past the lump again and forced out quietly, “Thanks, but it’s fine. It was expected at some point, you know?”

“Yeah. Doesn’t make it any easier though, does it?” Beau lost his parents back when you had worked together in Houston. His dad had passed unexpectedly due to a heart attack. Everyone had been shocked, of course, but it hit Beau’s mom the hardest. It wasn’t too long after that when she started developing her own health issues and began declining. Beau’s father had only been gone for a year and a half when he lost his mom as well. You and your unit were there for him, giving him your unending support, and half of the department had showed up to the funeral, just as they had the senior Mr. Arlen’s. Not only was Beau well liked and respected but his family were no strangers to law enforcement; his dad had served on the force for decades before he finally retired.

What you were feeling now in no way rivaled the loss he had endured back then. He not only had lost a parent, but he lost both in a short time frame. You couldn’t imagine how you would be feeling had that been you. You doubted you would be able to stand up much less continue to function day to day like he had. You wished you could borrow some of his strength, something you could use right about now.

“True.”

Another moment of quiet filled the car tainted by uncertainty and an almost alien awkwardness. That wasn’t the norm for the two of you but this situation also wasn’t the norm. Being your best friend and having known you for a long time, Beau knew some of your history but not all of it. What little you had told him had been enough for him to know this wasn’t a topic you liked to revisit and he needed to leave well enough alone. So he’d happily compensate and regale you with funny stories of the hijinks he and his brother used to get up to when they were younger instead. He didn’t push for more than you were willing to give and that was something you deeply appreciated about him.

And right now, you appreciated him even more for not pressing you for details or trying to make small talk around the huge elephant that was currently sitting on top of you. An elephant in the form of your grandmother, an elderly woman who helped raise you who you had a…complicated relationship with to say the least. You tried to think back to one of the last times you had seen her but you really couldn’t remember. The memory was there somewhere, on the edge of your mind, just out of reach. Instead, a memory resurfaced of a younger you holding onto her hand as you crossed a busy crosswalk in the city, wearing one of your best dresses with tights, shoes, a very proper coat with gold buttons done up, and a ribbon in your long hair. You had been on your way to see a play that she managed to get tickets for and you remembered that moment of her immediately shielding you as a car nearly hit you both, ignoring the traffic light as well as all of the pedestrians crossing. You couldn’t remember the heated exchange between her and the driver of the yellow cab, but you did remember her hurrying you to safety and then kneeling down to check that you were okay. You could see the determination in her light eyes shadowed by a layer of fear as she did up the top two buttons of your fancy coat and smoothed a hand down your hair. She had protected you and basically saved your life. The memory shocked you with its reappearance; you hadn’t thought about that one in a long time. You had to have been around six years old when that happened.

Beau cleared his throat quietly. “Listen, I’m on my way back.”

That jerked you out of your reverie. “What? No, Beau, don’t. I’m fine. You’re on vacation and so is Cassie. Kai was excited to go on this trip, don’t cut it short. I appreciate it but I’d rather your plans didn’t get interrupted.”

“I already talked to Cassie and she’s in agreement. We’re heading back. She talked to Kai and he understands. We’re going to try this again next month.”

The guilt was thick inside your chest. He had been trying for a while now to get Cassie to agree to a fishing trip with him, and he’d only just convinced her. “Beau…”

“Already done,” he assured you. “We’re packing up now actually. Besides, you’re going to need some time and Hoyt’s going to need backup.”

“I told you, I’m fine and I’ll be back to work tomorrow. You don’t have to—”

“You’re going to need the time for the services. Any idea on when they might be yet?”

You pressed your lips together and glanced in your rearview mirror. “Not yet.”

He heard what you weren’t saying. “Well, it just happened. Give ‘em some time and they’ll sort it out,” he offered gently.

“Yeah,” you muttered.

“You set up a flight yet?”

You shook your head, forgetting for a moment that he couldn’t see you. “No.”

“I should be back later tonight. I’ll come over and help you sort all of that out.”

It hit you in that moment that Beau was going to be seeing you in a few hours’ time. A part of you was relieved but another part of you wasn’t ready to let him in just yet. Not that you didn’t trust him (he was the person you trusted most actually) and not that he didn’t know how to be there for you, but something was stopping you from letting him.

“You’re going to be back late. How about you just stop by in the morning on your way to the office?”

You didn’t need to see Beau to know he was taken aback at your suggestion. “It’s not going to be that late,” he tried again. “I was thinking, if you didn’t mind, I could just stay at your place for the night. It’d be a shorter drive for me to the station tomorrow.”

You knew it would be and you knew he was just looking out for you, being there for you should you need him, but weirdly, that was the last thing you wanted right now. “I appreciate it, but it’s going to be a long drive and you still need to drop Cassie off. I’ll look up flights when I get home. You just focus on driving and let me know when you made it back okay.”

“Y/N—”

“Someone is calling me from a New York number. It could be important. I have to go. Drive safe, alright?”

“Darlin’, just—”

“Thank you for calling, Beau. It means a lot.” You meant that last part, you really did. You quickly disconnected the call before he could speak again. There was no call from New York, of course, and you know he knew that, but you just needed a second to think. You put your phone on silent and continued the drive to the small house you had put a down payment on when Beau had convinced you to move here to join him about a year or so before.

You ran a hand through your hair and sighed, feeling majorly conflicted. You wanted nothing more than one of Beau’s comforting hugs but at the same time, you didn’t want to be touched or comforted. You didn’t want anyone’s awkward condolences like Hoyt had offered you earlier after Poppernak told her you might have received some kind of bad news. You didn’t want to talk or cry or try to distract yourself from reality in any way, shape, or form. You wanted to just be.

And considering where you would be flying to in the next twenty four hours, you needed as much time to process and compartmentalize as you could get.

There was no processing or compartmentalizing happening. Your brain was a chaotic mess at best. Your thoughts were all over the place, same with your emotions, and yet somehow you still felt numb and in shock.

Not only did memories play on a loop inside your head but you could not form one single coherent thought. You had walked past your full sink of dishes at least four times before you remembered you were going to stack them in the dishwasher. You had to remind yourself that you hadn’t eaten breakfast that morning, preferring your usual coffee, and you had to eat something now that it was late afternoon so you could satiate the loudly rumbling hungry beast known as your stomach. You barely tasted the food or the beer you chose to wash it down with.

At some point, you had pulled out a shoebox you kept carefully hidden away in a closet and began to go through old photos you kept stashed alongside a few Christmas and birthday cards over the years. You studied your grandmother in each photo and whether it was a blessing or a curse, you weren’t sure which yet, you could hear her voice and even her laughter in your mind. You could hear her yelling, too, but your brain pushed those memories away, knowing you weren’t ready to deal with that just yet.

You came across one picture of the two of you. You were in high school and had just received an award. You two were standing outside of the school and neither of you were embracing or smiling too widely. One of your aunts had asked you both to take the picture, to mark the special occasion, but the truth was, you two had been arguing most of the day, practically up until the ceremony. Just one of the many arguments you both had over the years where you didn’t see eye to eye.

You dug deeper into the box until you pulled out a special group of photos in an envelope. You took a sip of beer, a deep breath, and then opened it. These were pictures of your parents, gone in a freak accident when you were barely kindergarten age. You smiled down at the photos of the two of them with a baby version of you. No matter where you were or who took the picture, all of you appeared to be happy. Sadly, you didn’t remember those times too much, the memories too hazy and existing on that fine line between reality and fantasy. You only remembered the sorrow, the pain, and the devastation their sudden absence left.

You came across a photo of you and your mother, but this time, your grandmother was also included. You must have been two years old and you were grinning widely from your mother’s lap at the older woman who smiled brightly back at you. You had even reached out your hands to her, almost as if you had been asking her to pick you up. You stared hard at the picture, almost as if trying to remember that exact moment in time so you could then remember the feeling.

Your phone ringing loudly made you jump and jerked you out of your concentration. You placed the photo down and sighed. You had put your phone back on when you arrived home a few hours ago and though he hadn’t called, Beau had sent you a few texts. It was more of him offering to come over, to be there for you, and to help with anything you needed. You had immediately swiped the notifications off of your screen; you couldn’t deal with that or anything else right now. You appreciated it but you just needed some time…some space actually. Just until you could get your head on straight.

You picked your phone up and glanced at the screen, surprised to see your cousin’s name flashing back at you.

Your brows furrowed and you immediately picked up the call. “Lucy? What’s wrong?”

“Hey,” she greeted you though her usual cheery voice lacked its usual enthusiasm. While you didn’t keep in touch with most of your family, Lucy had been the exception. You weren’t close by any means but her texts and calls didn’t always go ignored. “Aunt Ida said she called you today to tell you about Gran. How are you holding up?”

You shrugged. “As well as can be expected, I guess. How are you doing?” Lucy had been just as close with the grandmother you shared while growing up but she had also stayed within the family unit while you bolted. She and her husband, John, even purchased a home two blocks away from where your grandmother lived.

“Um, I’m okay,” she sighed into the phone. “It’s sad and not the way we expected but we all kind of knew it was coming.”

“Yeah,” you whispered, taking another sip of beer.

“I know it might sound horrible to say but it’s kind of a relief. For Gran, I mean. She’s no longer suffering. You know, after the past couple of years…”

You felt a familiar surge of guilt start up in your chest again, and a burning feeling began in the corners of your eyes. “Yeah,” you repeated. You both stayed quiet for a moment, each thinking back to Gran’s initial diagnosis of Alzheimer’s more than five years ago and how it had quickly progressed, especially during the pandemic years.

Lucy finally broke the silence. “So, um, I was just wondering if you were going to be flying in tomorrow.”

Your brows mashed together again. “Tomorrow?”

“Yeah. For the visitation the next day.”

Your head began to whirl. Perhaps it was the beer and you had misheard her. Though, you had only had two, maybe in conjunction with what you were feeling, you weren’t thinking straight. “Wait, wait. The visitation is the day after tomorrow?”

“Yes,” Luy sounded unsure why you were asking. “And the funeral will be the next morning. That’s why I was thinking you would probably be flying in tomorrow.”

“Aunt Ida told me that she had no idea when the services would be yet but she would let me know.”

“Oh.”

You could practically hear her nerves through the phone. “Lucy,” you warned. “When were the plans finalized?”

“Um…”

“Lucy.”

“Yesterday?” She nearly squeaked out.

That hit you like a gut punch. “Yesterday? I thought Gran just died this morning!”

Now you could really hear the nervousness in Lucy’s voice. “She, um, she passed on Monday morning.”

The fury working its way through your veins felt like molten fire. “Today is Wednesday!”

Lucy knew better than to answer that. “I’m so sorry, Y/N. I thought Aunt Ida explained when she said she spoke to you this morning. She was dealing with a lot and—”

“--couldn’t be bothered to tell me, I get it. But why didn’t you call me?” The tears building were practically burning your pupils. Your grandmother had passed away two days ago and no one could be bothered to tell you.

“I-I wanted to, Y/N. I really did but, Aunt Ida said—”

Your jaw tensed and you nearly slammed your bottle down on the floor next to you as you got to your feet, all too certain what Aunt Ida had said. While Lucy was a kinder soul than most in your biological family, she also lacked a backbone when it came to your older female relatives.

“Forget it,” you hissed, roughly wiping away tears that had escaped down your cheeks. “I’ll be arriving tomorrow. Is the obituary up or was she bullshitting me on that one, too?”

“N-No, they just posted it today. It’s actually quite nice. I think you’ll—”

“Send me the link,” you ordered before you hung up and quickly began scanning available flights as you hurried into your bedroom to begin packing.

It was late when you landed, your flight having been slightly delayed. Not that it mattered to you; if you could have delayed the flight altogether, you would have. But that wasn’t possible and neither was you staying in Helena. As angry as you were, you refused to let it keep you from doing the right thing. Plus, when you called the station earlier to tell Hoyt you wouldn’t be back until Monday, she had insisted you take the bereavement time available to you (more like ordered you) and see to your family, wishing you well. Normally, you would have put your foot down and flat out refused, content to hole up in a corner of the office and burrow yourself into work, but you knew she was right. You had to attend the services; you owed Gran that much at least.

You nodded a thanks to the cheery but tired flight attendant as she thanked you for flying with their airlines, and ambled down the bridge towards the airport. Thankfully, due to the late hour, there weren’t many people milling about and you were unencumbered from making your way down the escalator towards Baggage Claim.

While waiting for the carousel to start up, your phone started vibrating. You glanced at the screen, sighing when you saw the name pop up that had been popping up on and off all day.

You immediately rejected the call and slipped your phone back into silent mode. But before you could hit the button, a text snuck its way through to display on your screen.

You felt bad reading the message previews and you certainly weren’t trying to ignore your best friend but you just needed some time to process all of this on your own. You had sent him one quick text earlier telling him not to come by since you wouldn’t be home. You also told him you would call him as soon as you were able. Apparently, he was ignoring that last text going by his several attempts to make contact. You weren’t trying to stonewall him, you really weren’t, but you had to go into this with a clear head. Or as clear a head as you could have in these circumstances. Wasn’t that something he always said before you two went into anything dangerous on the job?

Speaking of the job, it wasn’t that you hadn’t seen your fair share of death, mostly in ghoulish evil ways that people had come up with in order to hurt each other, and it’s not that your grandmother’s passing wasn’t expected to happen at some point like Lucy had said. But you hadn’t been prepared for how you would feel when it did and you certainly hadn’t been prepared for it to happen now.

Conflicting emotions roiled in your head and churned in your stomach. Your empty stomach from that all-too familiar discomfort you’d gotten frequently during your career. The lunch you’d eaten earlier had made a reappearance after Lucy’s phone call. You would have to get some food and soon, but where you would get that at this late hour except a greasy diner, you couldn’t even begin to imagine. Not that it mattered, either. The very thought of food made an altogether different unpleasant sensation roll in your stomach. Emptiness versus nausea…fun.

Eventually, your other suitcase made its way to you and you quickly scooped it up. You ordered a Lyft, scoffing when you noticed the wait time was a half hour, possibly more, for a pickup. How was that even possible? This was an airport! At this rate, you’d be better off taking a cab but that was bound to be pricier than the Lyft. You heaved a great sigh and plopped down on your larger suitcase, resting your chin in your hand as you waited. Eventually, you whipped out your phone and decided to mindlessly scroll through your Instagram. You weren’t a fan of the app or any social media really but Em had made an account for you one day when you had unwisely left your phone sitting on one of Beau’s deck chairs while helping him pack Pedro for a camping trip he was taking her on. You quickly got bored of any new content on your feed, since there weren't any updates from anyone you actually cared about, and swiped over to your profile.

A glimmer of a smile appeared on your face when you saw the picture Em had taken of herself and her dad, posting it for you after she saw your Houston photo and labeled it a semi-pathetic attempt at a first post. Your eyes scanned through your meager posting and the picture of Poppernak that you had taken one day near the end of your shift reminded you why you wouldn’t be working with your beloved partner the next few days. Your smile immediately disappeared and you clicked out of the app, powered down the screen, and slipped the phone into your jacket pocket.

Luckily, only a little while later, your Lyft finally arrived. After loading your suitcases into the back with the driver’s help, you were on your way to the only hotel in town. You stared out the window as the scenery passed by. Your driver, Antonio, had tried to make small talk but thankfully begged off when he noticed you weren’t too talkative, most likely chalking it up to the late flight and you being tired. Familiar landmarks came into view as he turned onto another street and memories started to flood your mind. You shut your eyes, as if to keep them out, and it miraculously held them at bay a little longer. You then settled your gaze on the back of the driver seat, refusing to look out the windows until you arrived at your destination.

You’d have time enough to wallow in memories and regret the next few days. No reason to rush it.

As soon as you checked into your hotel room, you immediately jumped in the shower. It always made you feel better after traveling and the flight had felt excruciatingly long this go around. That could have had something to do with you coming from Montana, though. The few flights you’d taken from Texas back in the day had definitely been shorter.

You wrapped yourself in a towel, your damp hair spilling down your back, and started going through one of your suitcases to find body lotion. Once you found the bottle, before you could begin lathering it up in your hands, your phone vibrated on your night stand.

You heaved a sigh and glanced over, seeing you had another missed call from Beau, and yet another text.

You nearly rolled your eyes, knowing he would make good on this threat if you didn’t check in with him at least once before you went to sleep. And that was the last thing you needed right now.

You slipped in your earbuds, hit his name, then the phone icon, and switched it over to bluetooth as you began to moisturize your skin. He answered it in two rings.

“Hey,” he gruffed out before clearing his throat. “About time you called me back.”

You ignored how hearing his voice immediately made your chest feel that little bit lighter and your shoulders release some of the tension you’d been carrying around the past day. “Yeah, well, when someone threatened to put a BOLO on my ass, I responded real quick. That’s all I need, this town’s cops pounding on my door, in addition to everything else.” You had meant it to come out teasingly but your voice had betrayed your aggravation. You regretted it the moment the words were out of your mouth. You knew Beau was just worried about you, that he cared about you, and wanted to make sure you were alright. In all fairness, you could have at least sent him a text to let him know you landed but you were tired and didn’t feel like talking. He would have understood. He wasn’t the asshole in this scenario; you were.

“I’m sorry about that,” he offered gently and you could hear the genuine remorse in his tone. “I wasn’t trying to give you a hard time but damn, Y/N, not one single text to let me know you’re still alive?”

You flinched at the last word and started applying the lotion more aggressively. You were eager to be done with this call, with everything, so you could crash and finally get some much needed shut-eye. You hadn’t slept much in the past forty eight hours, probably stress from the job (it happened sometimes), and you were feeling it.

“Sorry,” he murmured. “I shouldn’t have said that.” More remorse.

“It’s fine,” you muttered, popping the cap on the bottle closed and placing it on the nightstand. “Well, now that you know that I’m fine, no BOLO’s are necessary.”

“Y/N, I didn’t—”

You knew you didn’t really have a right to be angry with him but you also didn’t have the bandwidth for dealing with anyone or anything right now. You appreciated his concern and him checking on you, but all you wanted to do was hit the sack and evade consciousness for a few hours. “Listen, it’s super late, I just got in because it was a late flight and delayed at that. I’m exhausted. So if we could…” You left it open-ended, hoping he’d just take the hint and say goodnight.

You heard some rustling on the other end and you realized he must have been in bed already when you called. You quickly glanced at the alarm clock and thought over the time difference. It wasn’t even 10:30 yet back in Helena and Beau was already going to sleep for the night? That was odd. Then again, he was now a deputy sheriff down and Hoyt would need the backup in case something came up. Plus, you knew he had cut his vacation short to rush back to Helena. He was probably just as exhausted as you were, possibly more so. “Y/N… You’re not shutting down on me, are you?”

You practically did a double take at the question. “What? No! I’m not. What, I’m tired and want to go to sleep after the long day I’ve had and that’s suddenly me shutting down on you? Seriously? All because I didn’t answer a few texts or pick up one of your many phone calls?” You had no idea why but that question majorly pissed you off. The logical part of you knew you were overreacting to a genuinely concerned question from your best friend but your temper seemed to be off to the races; you couldn’t stop it if you tried. “I get that you’re a grade A worry-er and everything but I’m not some goddamn child you need to check up on every ten minutes for Christ’s sake!” In your rush of anger, you hadn’t even realized just how much your voice had raised. Not until there was a deafening silence in the room and on the other end once you finished your little tirade.

“I wasn’t trying to insinuate that you were, darlin’,” he spoke calmly.

“Don’t you darlin’ me. Don’t you dare patronize me with that shit, Arlen. Do you hear me? Don’t you dare.” Your chest felt immediately tight again and tension filled your body once more. You huffed out an angry breath and decided the best thing for you to do in this situation was to end the call as soon as possible. “Look, you wanted to know I’m still alive, now you know. I would appreciate it if you would stop calling me and texting me all the time while I’m here and threatening me when you don’t hear back from me right away. That’s the last fucking thing I need on top of everything else,” you snapped.

Beau remained quiet but you could still hear his breathing on the other end so you knew he was listening to your ranting.

“Now, I’m going to bed. I appreciate the check in but it’s unnecessary. When the services are over and I’m going to head back, I’ll let you know.”

Still nothing.

“Good night, Beau.” You hung up and angrily tossed your phone onto the bed with your earbuds before heading back to the bathroom so you could blow dry your hair.

You thought over the entire conversation. You felt slightly bad that you had lost your temper with him when he was just making sure you were okay but God, you didn’t need that right now. What you needed was to get through the next few days so you could return to your life, your normal routine, as fast as possible. The best way you could do that was to keep going, not allowing yourself time to think, and get this done.

A twinge of guilt surged in your chest when you had that thought. You hadn’t meant anything disrespectful towards your grandmother or to insinuate that you didn’t care that she had died when you were thinking that. It was just…things were already going to be difficult, if your Aunt Ida’s attitude on the phone had been any indication as well as her behavior so far. If it hadn’t been for Lucy’s call earlier and the obituary link she texted you, you wouldn’t have even known when the services were going to be so you could grab the first flight out. Yes, things were bound to be difficult and tense until this was over.

You unplugged your hair dryer in a huff and finished getting ready to go to sleep. Beau just needed to give you space. Your life in Montana had nothing to do with anyone or anything here and you were determined to keep it that way. Texas never did despite your few trips back over the years; Big Sky Country wasn’t going to either.

You supposed you shouldn’t have been surprised at the text message notification on your screen when you lit up your phone.

You felt that twinge of guilt again but this time in your heart. Beau hadn’t deserved what you had unleashed on him before. He was a good man and he hadn’t done anything wrong. You were mentally kicking yourself as you hurriedly dressed for bed and snuggled under the sheets. You stared at your screen, your thumb hovering over his name, the desire strong within you to call him and apologize. You yearned to hear his voice one more time, even if it was just him talking and you listening, him giving you hell for the things you had said in anger earlier. Hell, you almost wished he was here with you so you could fold yourself into his arms and burrow into his chest, letting his Texan drawl wash over your ear as he assured you everything would be alright. And you could stay there as long as you wanted, safe and comforted, not having to face the world or how it had changed so drastically for you with one phone call.

After a minute of indecision, you decided to let things be, get some rest, and then call him tomorrow to apologize when you were a little more clear-headed. And God, you hoped you would be more clear-headed. You powered down your screen and turned the light off, getting into a more comfortable position. You closed your eyes and tried to let the silence settle over you to start lulling you into sleep.

A few minutes passed by of you unsuccessfully getting your mind to stop racing, constantly replaying your phone call with Beau, the phone call from your aunt, what Lucy’s call revealed (though you shouldn’t have been surprised), what you would be facing come tomorrow, and everything that entailed. Almost as if it was a track on repeat. Finally, you let out a loud huff and reached for the TV remote, turning the television on. You channel surfed until you landed on a rerun of The Golden Girls. You tried to get into the episode; the series was an old favorite that you loved. But when you saw Sophia talking to her granddaughter, you winced and decided that the show wasn’t for you right now. You continued to click through channels until you found an episode of Everybody Loves Raymond. The minute Marie walked through the youngest Barone’s household, giving her daughter-in-law a glare, you let out another wince. You finally settled on The Weather Channel and stared at the screen while the woman talked about the highs and lows expected for the next week in the area. You noticed that rain showers were being forecast for the day of the burial. How apt. And just like that, you knew your brain wasn't going to let you get any rest.

You sighed and tossed the remote away from you and rubbed your hands down your tired face. So much for sleeping.

The next day, you arrived at a familiar red-colored house with white trim, stepping up onto the old wooden porch. You could already hear a low buzz coming from inside as voices batted back and forth in conversation mixed with the sounds of young children running around and playing. One voice stuck out to you from all the rest and it made you tense up. A part of you wanted to turn around and retreat back to your hotel room.

You briefly closed your eyes and took a deep breath. No. You were not going to avoid this. You couldn’t. You wouldn’t. You could do this. You would do this. You were an adult now, you had your own life, and you were a deputy sheriff for Christ’s sake. You dealt with dead bodies, assaults, and much scarier criminals every single day. You refused to turn around and leave with your head hanging down.

As if to ensure you wouldn’t be able to leave, without your permission, your hand lifted and gave two confident raps on the front door. You could hear the chatter pause long enough that you knew they had heard the sounds. You straightened up and squared your shoulders, making sure you were holding your head high just like you did during work hours. It was a silly fleeting thought but you almost wished you were wearing your badge on your belt, having it near as some layer of invisible protection.

Before you could scoff internally at yourself, the door yanked open and there stood the older woman you hadn’t wanted to deal with. You hadn’t seen her in years and while her sandy hair was mixed with more gray and her face sported a few more lines resulting in an even harsher scowl than you remembered, the dark eyes full of contempt whenever they focused on you remained the same.

You didn’t smile, tear up, or surge forward for a hug, and neither did she. “Aunt Ida,” you greeted.

“Y/N,” she replied icily. “So you decided to show up for the services after all?”

You could feel your teeth set on edge but you schooled your features. You weren’t going to let her little digs get at you and you would be damned to let her see it if they somehow did. You weren’t fourteen anymore. “I did. Mind if I come in?”

Her beady eyes gave you a once over and she practically sneered before stepping back and opening the door a little wider. Not exactly a warm invitation but an invitation nonetheless. You gave her a nod and took it, ignoring the tiny snort of derision she let out as you did.

You sat uncomfortably on the old couch that you had hated as a kid. Aunt Ida had insisted this couch was for entertaining, not for young children to watch television on or jump on or do anything on really. The seat was practically as rigid as your aunt.

You silently wondered what Beau was up to now as a temporary means of mentally escaping this situation. You had tried to call him before you came over here but his phone had gone straight to voicemail. You would be lying if you said you weren’t a little hurt and a little let down that you hadn’t been able to speak with him. He had told you to call him anytime, that he was there for you despite the harsh words you had launched at him the previous night, but the one time you actually tried to reach out, he hadn’t been available. You hadn’t been prepared for the beep of the voicemail, signaling you to talk, and you ended up leaving him the most awkward message you had ever left someone. “Hey. It’s me. …I’m sorry. Call me back when you get this, okay? Or if you don’t want to, you don’t have to. I’ll understand, but…it would be really nice to hear your voice. Well…you know what I mean. Anyway, just call me back…if you want.” That had been four hours ago. And granted, he was three hours behind you now, but you knew he would already be up, getting ready for the day. So why was his phone off?

You had chastised yourself out loud after hanging up the phone, telling yourself that he was probably in the middle of something for a case that he got called in on overnight and couldn’t be disturbed. How many times did you have to do the same? You had scowled at yourself in the bathroom mirror while putting the finishing touches on your foundation. “What the hell is wrong with you, Y/N? You need to get a fucking grip.” In perhaps an immature move that you were glad no one else was around to witness, you stuck your tongue out at yourself and shook your head, muttering “Stop being such an asshole already”, and walked out the door.

And now you were here, in the house you didn’t really want to be in, surrounded by people that you didn’t really want to be around. Well, perhaps that last thought was harsh. There was really only one person you didn’t really want to see and she had been the one to let you in the door.

You quickly glanced around the room you were in, noting not much had changed since you had been here last, when you had left this town in your rearview mirror and didn’t look back. Even the scent you hated as a child was still the same: a mix of old lady perfume and stale cookies. You could feel nausea starting up in your stomach but thankfully you hadn’t eaten anything before you came here.

Your Uncle Mason, who sat on your right, gave you a tight smile when he noticed you surveying the room.

“Still looks the same, huh?” He offered.

“Exactly the same,” you agreed without looking at him.

Your cousin, Lucy, sat in the stiff armchair on your left and looked around as well, smiling. “I like that it hasn’t changed since we were kids. A lot of good memories happened here.”

Your gaze dropped to the oak coffee table that still had the scratch in it from when you were a child and didn’t know any better. That was one of your countless infractions your aunt had held against you. “Yeah, good memories,” you muttered. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed Mason tense a little and Lucy fidgeting nervously.

You all heard Aunt Ida finish up her conversation and hang up the old handset before she made her way into the room. “That was the funeral home. There was an issue with the plot next to Dad but it’s been resolved.”

“What kind of issue?” Uncle Mason asked.

“Payment,” Aunt Ida spat out as she sat down before turning a fresh glare on you. “I hope you’re not here thinking there’s any money waiting for you and that’s why you decided to show up.”

You nearly ground your teeth together but forced yourself to remain calm. “Of course not. I’m here for Gran.”

She scoffed and shook her head. “Only took her dying, right?”

Lucy struggled to her feet, her round belly acting as an obstacle, but she managed. “You know, I don’t hear the kids anymore. I’m going to go check on them and be right back.” She then hurried out of the room; if she could have run, you bet she would be sprinting towards the backyard her kids had been urged out into when you had arrived. You couldn’t blame her. You would be, too.

“Ida,” Mason attempted to admonish his sister. “Now is not the time.”

“Then when is it?” She snapped, making Mason shrink back, before she turned her scowl back onto you. “Why else would you show up? It’s not like you came when she needed help, when we all needed help with her. You didn’t visit her once while she was in the nursing home. Not once when she was in the hospital.”

Your jaw tensed and you felt the familiar twinge of guilt deep within. “You told me not to come, Aunt Ida,” you reminded her.

She barked out a laugh. “Is that how you heard it?”

“That’s how I heard it because that’s exactly how you said it.” You didn’t look away when she was slightly taken aback by your reply. You refused to back down from this one. You reminded yourself that you were no longer a child; you were a grown woman who didn’t have to take her shit anymore. You were no longer dependent on her or anyone else in this family for anything though when you were, she had only been too happy to make you feel like crap for it every single day of your existence.

The woman shook her head, laughing at you. “Right. You’re some big shot cop now, right? Too good for us lowly citizens.” She smirked over at Mason in collusion, though her brother was shaking his head, refusing to meet her gaze. That angered her further and the glare she settled on you was worse than before. “It’s obvious why you’re really here. Like I said, there’s no money for you. Anything she had left went to the payments for the nursing home and her funeral. And what she had left was pretty much nothing. So if you came here expecting a payout from her will, you’re going to be sorely disappointed.”

You lifted your chin slightly higher in defiance of her accusations. “And like I said, Aunt Ida, I didn’t come here for anything other than to pay my respects to Gran, and to help where I can.” Your voice softened a little at the thought of your grandmother. “She would have wanted that.”

The other woman scoffed once more but didn’t say more due to the doorbell ringing.

“I’ll get it,” Mason hurried to offer and then nearly rushed from the room, leaving you and Ida in one hell of a glaring contest.

“I’m only trying to do right by Gran,” you assured her.

“Too little, too late,” she hissed.

You unclenched your jaw and took a quiet breath. “Yeah,” you reluctantly agreed. “Suppose you’re right.” Right then and there you decided that once you were back in Montana, you would sever all ties, this time permanently. You owed nothing to this woman or to any of them, regardless of any blood you shared. The one person you might have owed something to once upon a time was no longer alive. If anything, you were being quickly reminded why you had left this house all those years ago and hadn’t come back.

Ida harrumphed and continued to shake her head.

You were about to stand and leave, having had more than enough in this one little exchange with your aunt, and tell her to call you if she or anyone needed anything before the wake, when Mason returned and a familiar figure filled the entryway to the room. Your eyes widened and your jaw dropped.

There stood the very man you had been trying to get a hold of earlier, giving you one of his warm smiles. You could see slight rings of shadow underneath his eyes that were similar to yours that you had been sporting this morning before using concealer. Exhaustion lined his face but so did relief. His green eyes that were centered on you softened slightly and in that moment, you knew everything that had happened the night before had been forgiven. He was here, for you.

You didn’t remember making the decision to move when you hurried over to him, Mason barely able to get out of your way before you launched yourself at Beau who immediately wrapped his arms around you, practically picking you up off the floor. You squeezed your eyes shut to keep any tears from coming out and burrowed into his neck, happy to breathe in the familiar scent of his cologne. No one said anything and for that you were grateful. You didn’t want anything to shatter the one good moment you’d had in the past two days.

Eventually, when you felt like you wouldn’t break down in tears and you had yourself under pretty good control, you choked out in a whisper, “You’re here.”

“Damn right I am, darlin’,” he confirmed into your ear, making you smile as you heard that Texan drawl you loved so much. The tension in his body relaxed though his hold on you did not. You felt him press a kiss to your hair before hugging you even tighter. “I’m here.”

Please let me know if you would like to be tagged for this mini series.

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#beau arlen x reader #beau arlen x female reader #beau arlen x you #beau arlen x y/n #beau arlen #beau arlen fanfiction #i need your hand but i don't want to burn it part 1 #i need your hand but i don't want to burn it #thebiggerbear writes

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theyhavetakenovermylife · 7 months

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I have been o b s e s s e d with your bayverse kid series. Obsessed! Read them all yesterday before bed and noticed Mikey doesn't have one like his brothers >:O

Now I admit, I mightve not seen when the others were posted but I'm just curious! Will Mikey have one of those "kid stories" like the others have? Totally cool if not! I was genuinely just curious

Puss och hej, leverpastej

Children of Michelangelo (Angst/Fluff)

Bayverse!Michelangelo x reader

A/N: Of course Mikey’s kids are going to have a story. I just haven’t gotten around to write one yet, but now I have😂 This is a bit different that the other ones, because this time, they aren’t “causing trouble” on purpose🧡

Hva’ så Sverige. Klar på maj i Malmö?😜

Warnings: Children getting lost, scared children.

Compared to their cousins, Sunny and Luis were a pair of angels, rarely causing trouble and rarely fighting. But that did not mean that they never caused trouble, only that they never really did it on purpose.

Sunny and Luis had always been curious children, taking after their father. Wandering off to places they shouldn’t be, simply because they couldn’t help but wonder what could be hiding in these strange places. You and Mikey didn’t have anything against your children being curious, often helping them to tap into their curiosity, and their will to explore and learn about the world around them. However, there were times where their explorations would go too far, sending them into somewhat dangerous situations, where you and Mikey would have to step in. Like the time Sunny had helped Luis crawl up to a high beam with a camera, wanting him to take a picture of the living area from above, wanting to know what it would look like for a giant. But of course, it was not as easy getting down as it had been getting up, and soon you and Mikey ran to the living area, to the sound of Sunny crying and pointing at Luis, who still sat on a high beam, crying ever since he realized he couldn’t get down. Well, thank goodness for Mikey and his rocket powered skateboard, and his ability to calm down people easily, otherwise things would have gone very bad, very quickly.

That day had proved a valuable lesson to Sunny and Luis, teaching not to climb up further than they could handle. But that did not put a stop to your children's curiosity, one bit. At the age of 6, Sunny got tired of exploring the lair, as it seemed she had found every place that was worth finding. Soon, with you and Mikey’s permission, Sunny would start wandering around the sewers, not going any further than you and Mikey had allowed her, along with a time she had to return home. And Sunny followed those rules closely, never giving you or your husband any reason to worry.

At the age of 4, Luis too wanted to explore the sewers with his 7 year old sister, loudly begging for you to allow him. And you finally relented, instructing them to stick with each other, and follow the rules you and Mikey had already set in place. And so, Sunny and Luis let out happy screams, taking each other by the hand, before running past you and Mikey, and out to the network of sewers.

Your kids continued to do this for half a year, running out to the sewers just after breakfast in the short time period before training, then again after lunch, and then lastly after dinner. It had suddenly become their favorite pastime, telling you and Mikey with happy smiles about what they had gotten up to. But one day took a turn, proving to be not as joyful as the others.

All of you had just finished dinner, with Sunny and Luis jumping over Romeo in order to load their plates into the dishwasher as the first, almost making Galileo stumble when they ran past him. They quickly hugged you and Mikey goodbye, going over the rules one more time. Don’t walk too far and come home at the promised time. It had almost become routine at this point. And with that, the two children ran through the living area, out the door and out to the tunnels of the sewer.

The laughter of Sunny and Luis rang against the rounded brick walls, carrying up and down the long stretches of tunnels, mixing together with the sound of splash water that flowed through the drains. Sunny and Luis was jumping back and forth over a small stretch over running water, laughing their hearts out, whenever they landed on the other side, yelling out words and phrases they had heard their father and uncles call out during training, sometimes even mimicking their grandpa Splinter, in the way he would still call out the turtles every once in a while.

“Straighten your back!”, Sunny yelled, mimicking Master Splinter, as she jumped over the water with a bright smile.

“Bring your legs higher!”, Luis yelled out, mimicking Master Splinter as well, following Sunny with a jump.

They continued to do this for a while, until their attention moved on, thinking of other games they could play, just like any other healthy child would do. They soon settled on tag.

Luis ran from Sunny with a joyous scream, knowing he had to run fast in order to outrun his sister’s longer legs. He turned a corner with Sunny hot on his heels, screaming again when he narrowly avoided her outstretched arm and reaching hand. With a laugh, Sunny regained her balance, before continuing her chase after her little brother. They jumped over water and duck under pipes, and squished through narrow passage ways, before continuing their chase on the other side.

Sunny and Luis' healthy and strong legs carried them around for long, running for what seemed like several joyful hours, before Sunny finally managed to catch up with her lightning fast little brother.

“Tag! You’re it!”, Sunny said, as her fingers finally managed to touch Luis’ shoulder.

Luis stopped, ready to turn in order to run after his sister, but when he turned, he found her looking around in unease. Luis followed her gaze, taking in the surroundings of the sewer. It was not an area the two of them knew, let alone ever seen before. It was darker here, with pipes leaking and dripping, along with a strong horrible smell, worse than another other place they knew.

“W- where are we?”, Luis asked, looking to his older sister for an answer. However, he was horrified by her answer, and fear started to grow inside of him.

“I don’t know”, Sunny said, feeling herself grow fearful. But she couldn’t get scared now, not with her little brother around. So therefore she took his hand, and started walking in the direction they came from. “Come on, let's go home”.

The siblings started walking down the dark tunnels, following the route they had taken. But soon they found themselves at a crossroads, standing in front of several tunnels leading in different directions.

“I- I don’t r- remember this place”, Luis said, grabbing onto Sunny with both of his hands, trembling against her.

“Neither do I”, Sunny said quietly, not wishing to lie in front of her brother, nor wishing to scare him more than he already was. But that was exactly what happened, with Luis suddenly janking down on her arm, tears in his eyes.

“Are we lost?!”, he asked, fighting a sob, his lower lip trembling.

“No”, Sunny said, looking down the tunnels. “Not yet. Let’s try this way”.

And so the two of them continued down one of the tunnels, only to end up in another part of the sewers, the two young children had never seen before, only causing further distress.

As they wandered the sewers, looking for an area they could recognize, it didn’t take long before Luis started crying for you and Mikey, clinging onto Sunny with every muscle in his body. Sunny continued to drag him along, hoping soon to find a place she knew. But no matter where she looked, she found nothing. It didn’t take long, before she too started crying, pulling Luis close as they decided to hide in the corner of one of the tunnels.

Sunny and Luis did not know how long they sat there, nor did they know what was going to be of them. The wild imagination of the children had already managed to create horrible pictures of monsters in the sewer, jumping in fear whenever they saw a shadow, thinking it was one of the monsters coming for them. And when they suddenly saw a shadow grow from one of the tunnels, along with the sound of footsteps, the children duck further into the corner. It could only be a monster. One of the monsters was coming to get them. But then…

“Sunny! Luis! Are you in here?”

At the sound of the familiar voice calling out their names, the kids stopped their silent crying, before running to the tunnel, when the growing shadow slowly turned into the welcomed form of their father. The sight of Mikey in the dark tunnel, caused cries of joy from the kids, as they hurried over to wrap their arms around him, before Mikey crouched down to them, letting them cry out their worries against his shoulders. Mikey held them close, feeling relieved that he finally had found them.

“There you are”, he whispered, letting them lean their weight against him. “Goodness I was worried? What are you two doing here? Are you okay? You know you’re not allowed to stay out for so long, and especially not so far away”.

“W- we g- got l- lost”, Sunny whimpered through sups, burying her face against Mikey’s shoulder, while Luis started climbing into Mikey’s arms, wishing for him to carry him home. “W- we w- were s- scared”.

“Me and mommy was also scared”, Mikey said, stroking her head with his hand, before taking her into his other arm, so he could carry them back the way he came from. “Come, let’s find the others. Mommy and the others are out looking for you”.

“H- have w- we b- been g- gone for l- long?”, Luis asked, his tear stained cheek resting against Mikey’s shoulder.

“Yeah, you were supposed to be home two hours ago”, Mikey said, turning the corner of another tunnel, finally getting to an area the kids remembered having ran past. “That’s why we went out looking for you. We thought something had happened to you”.

“S- sorry d- dad”, Sunny said, rubbing her eyes.

“Aww, little sunshine”, Mikey said. “You don’t have to say you’re sorry. I’m sure you didn’t go that far on purpose, and I’m just happy that both of you are okay”.

Mikey continued walking through the tunnels, making sure to keep his kids talking every step of the way, knowing how it always calmed them down. And it didn’t take long before he found you and the other turtles, all searching through the tunnels. At the sight of your husband carrying your tired children down the sewer tunnels towards you, you ran towards them, feeling happy tears pressing against your eyes. You tired children reached out for you, holding onto you as you threw your arms around them, pressing kisses to their foreheads, relieved that they were home once again.

That day Sunny and Luis learned a valuable lesson, and would never walk too far away from their home. Or, at least not without their parents, or making sure they knew their way home again. And for the next few days, the children would stay inside the lair to play, before they finally ventured out to the sewers once more, feeling their curiosity come to life once again. However this time, they were more aware of their surroundings, and would never get lost in the sewers again.

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dellalyra · 1 year

Text

𝙨𝙖𝙣𝙘𝙩𝙪𝙖𝙧𝙮 - 𝘧𝘢𝘮𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴

ɢᴏᴊᴏ ꜱᴀᴛᴏʀᴜ

A/N: a request from my angel @soraya-daydreams <3 and an homage to episode 3

CW: fluff, mutual pining, Suguru can’t handle this anymore, hints at spice so mdni.

“So… are they always like this?” The young Riko Amanai asks Geto Suguru, who’s sitting beside her on sun lounger on the beach as they watch a lanky white haired being chased by a cackling young woman, who was waving a pile of seaweed at him.

“This is mild.” Suguru rolls his eyes.

“And they’re definitely not dating?” Riko asks, disbelieving.

“Nope.”

“But? They’re completely in love with each other?” Riko presses.

“Yup. Have been since day one too. Dumbasses.” He rolls his eyes. He laughs to himself thinking of the tissue he passed to Satoru earlier, nosebleed effective immediately the second you walked out in your swimwear.

“Dumbasses.” The girl agrees, nodding her head.

Geto takes his phone from his pocket and opens the video camera app.

“Riko - will you say what you noticed about Y/N and Gojo?” He asks, pressing record.

The girl smiles and faces the camera.

“These two are completely in love, it’s so cute! He’s obviously like, crazy about her - the way he looks at her is just the cutest! She’s like - constantly looking at him too, she started blushing so much earlier when he fixed her hair I thought she’d faint.” She says, as she points to the two figures still running around the beach.

Geto stops recording and sends the video to Shoko, knowing she’ll definitely get a kick out of it.

Meanwhile, down the beach - you had just been tackled into the sand, a large pale hand grasping the back of your head as you tumble down.

“No! No more seaweed for you, young lady! You’re too dangerous, it’s a weapon above your grade.” Satoru says as he uses a beach to take the slimy plants from your hand and whoosh it back into the ocean.

“Give it back, asshole! I found it, so it’s mine - and if I want to throw it at you then I will!” You say as you (fruitlessly) try to wrestle out of his grasp.

“Absolutely not! Nope! Look, it’s gone now. I’ve disarmed you. Submit to me, wench.” He laughs as he leans in to tickle your sides.

The voice in your head whispers that you’ll submit to him any day, and in that moment you’ve never been more glad nobody here can read minds.

That thought seems to click something in your mind as you realise the position you’re now in.

You lay, flat on your back on the soft, warm sand as Satoru hovers over you, thighs caging in your hips and arms pinning your wrist above your head. You feel your face flush, and you feel his breath on your face take a sharp intake as he obviously snaps out of the sunny reverie too.

He lets go of your wrists, quickly covering his flush with a smirk and a joke. He takes a moment to admire you, shining in the sun and all your curves and edges looking tantalisingly soft - every inch of you sheer, lust-inducing perfection to him. He whips his head away, staring any longer would cause consequences that his thin swim shorts wouldn’t be able to hide.

“If I find a sea cucumber, it’s on sight.” He says, poking your nose and trying to hide the slight tremble in his hands as he rolls of you and picks you up to toss you over his shoulder. He thinks you might be the only person capable of flustering him this much, he’s Gojo Satoru - the strongest, incapable of being demeaned. Yet with you, he’s just Satoru.

He likes that.

A lot.

You squeal as he begins to run with you over his shoulder to where the others are sitting. Riko making a sandcastle with Kuroi nearby, and Geto sitting eating some sushi from the store you got your day’s supplies.

After your (fruitless) fight, Satoru sets you down on the second sun lounger so gently, as if you were a feather, and pats your head. You place your big floppy sun hat on your head, to afford you some protection in the midday rays and reapply some sunscreen to your arms and legs. As you squeeze the bottle, you notice it says that it’s not waterproof.

“Satoru! C’mere, since you were in the water you need to put more sunscreen on!” You say, beckoning him to sit by you, to which he eagerly obliges and plonks himself on his knees on the lounger.

He lathers some on his arms and you can’t help but look out of the corner of your eye, the lingering sea salt and gloss of the cream made his pale skin shine and emphasised the toned muscles of his arms, and the defined lines of his torso - he’s been playing so much basketball lately, and it’s clear the training has been paying off. His physique in first year had been much more boyish, both of you only 16 at the time, and now - at almost 18, you can see all traces of adolescence leaving him.

You’re snapped from your trance by a snort coming from beside you, and a smirking Geto Suguru seems to be the culprit - you scowl at his jeering, embarrassed he caught your staring.

Satoru snaps the bottle shut.

“Eh? Satoru, you didn’t put any on your face!” You say - poking his nose.

“It’s slimy! It’s not going on my face!” He protests, pouting.

“You will burn! You’re far too fair to be without sunscreen! Infinity doesn’t keep out UV rays!” You argue.

“I don’t like how it feels on my hands! Nuh-uh, no way! Not wearing it!” He says flicking the bottle toward you, like a stroppy toddler.

“Okay - how about if I do it?” You try to reason.

He considers for a second.

“Fine. But just so you stop pestering me.” His nose scrunches.

You squeeze a little on your fingers and you hear the buzz of his infinity come down. You warm it on your fingers and lean in to him, gently rubbing it into his enviably soft skin, careful to avoid his eyes as you go. You try not to flush cherry red at the way his sparkly eyes never leave your face as you sit so close to him, you think the heat must be getting to you because you thought his eyes flicked down to your lips at one point, must be dehydration.

You add a tiny bit more to the tip of his nose and then smile.

“All done!” You smile, trembling hands being tucked away.

Satoru seems like a man in a trance.

“Ya’ know, you’re gonna make a great mom someday.” He says, voice low and soft - a glimpse of the gentle, vulnerable Satoru you’ve been honoured to witness.

You smile, your heart full and butterflies swarming - your mind immediately thinks ‘hopefully to your kids’ and images of white haired cherubic babies come to mind.

You giggle, and he smiles.

“I hope so, I want to be.” You shrug.

The moment is broken by one Riko Amanai.

“Alright lovebirds and professional third wheel, it’s time to go to the aquarium!” You and Satoru just apart at the accusation and Geto grumbles about not being a third wheel, but you all stand up anyway.

This is her day.

You slip your sundress on over your bikini and before you can lift your beach bag, Satoru slings it over his shoulder without a word, just a dazzling smile to make you weak at the knees.

The aquarium in Okinawa is stunning, a wide range of species housed there and lots of feeding shows and wildlife to see.

Geto wanders to go find you all food, and you decide to give Riko and Kuroi some time to themselves. You grab Satoru’s arm and pull him to sit on a bench overlooking the manta rays.

“They need space. We need to look after her but, they need time. Kuroi is… almost like a big sister to her.” You say, and Satoru nods.

“I just don’t get how she’s so okay with it all.” He says.

“It’s all she’s been raised for. This is what she knows, and she believes in his destiny. In that way, I think she might be the bravest person I’ve ever met.” You say, eyes following the girl at a distance.

“Is it what she wants though? What if she changes her mind?” He asks.

“Do you think she will?”

“She should at least have that option.”

“Are you saying what I think you are, Satoru?” You ask, turning to face him.

“I think we give her the option.”

“If she refuses, the higher ups will lose their shit. We’ll be targeted. Blamed.” You say, voice serious and low.

“Does that bother you?” He looks at you, a smirk on his face.

You can’t help but smile back.

“Nah. Fuck ‘em.” You say, nudging his shoulder with yours.

The rest of the day was spent in the aquarium. Satoru couldn’t keep his eyes off you when a worker asked if you wanted to hold a starfish, and the light in your eyes was so bright he was in awe. You showed Riko, and using a small amount of your cursed energy, politely asked the starfish to lift an arm to wave at the girl who squealed and jumped up and down and asked if she could give it a high five, to which you nodded. You looked so happy, so beautiful - he thinks he couldn’t possibly love someone as much as he loves you. He thinks he’d like to bring you back here sometime.

You were in much the same boat, the blue light of the water reflecting off Satoru’s hair and eyes entranced you like hypnosis, you couldn’t tear your eyes from him - marvelling in the smiles he gave you when you pointed out a pretty fish. His laugh made your soul bubble every time he pointed at an ugly fish and turned to Suguru saying ‘bro look, it’s you!’.

The day came to a close and you all went your separate ways to your hotel rooms that night, all of them part of the presidential suite that Satoru had rented for the night. Suguru’s eyes flicked between you both, as he said goodnight and left, leaving you standing on the balcony with Satoru.

“Not your bedtime?” He says, poking your arm.

“Nah, I want to savour this for a while longer.” You say, smiling and looking over the ocean view, soft summer breeze stroking your hair in balmy warmth.

“The view?” He asks.

You look at him, and smile softly - if anyone had seen you they would have clearly seen the purest love reflected in your eyes as you looked at the boy beside you.

“All of it.” You say.

He smiles back, and takes a chance and stretches his arm around your back to pull you into his side. His chance pays off, as you lean your head on his shoulder and sit to watch the moonlight bounce off the gentle lapping waves of Okinawa, bathed in comfort and joy.

Suguru peaks through a crack in the door, and sees your head leaning on his best friends shoulders. Smiling, he whips out his phone and snaps a photo. Maybe, the never ending wait for you two to confess your love wouldn’t be much longer.

5 years later, Okinawa aquarium had four visitors on a warm summer day. A tall, broad and muscled man with white hair and dark sunglasses had his arm wrapped around the waist of a shorter woman in a sundress, kissing the top of her head as she smiled at the fish before her - she was giggling, head thrown back when he pointed to a sea urchin then to the little boy by his other side, which seemed to greatly displease the young dark haired boy beside them, as a brunette little girl joined in on the giggles and snapped a photo of her brother on a disposable camera beside the tank of urchins.

ᴿᵉᶜᵒᵐᵐᵉⁿᵈᵉᵈ ᴸⁱˢᵗᵉⁿⁱⁿᵍ

ᴴᵘᵐᵐⁱⁿᵍᵇⁱʳᵈ ⁻ ᴹᵉᵗʳᵒ ᴮᵒᵒᵐⁱⁿ, ᴶᵃᵐᵉˢ ᴮˡᵃᵏᵉ

#submission #jjk #jjk x reader #gojo satoru #gojo satoru x reader #gojo x reader #gojo fluff #anime #family formations extras #dad!gojo

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icaruskeyartist · 11 months

Text

"How much of you is metal?"

"Are you a cyborg?"

"No, they're obviously like Mr. Sun!"

You had. Made a mistake. Came to the daycare an hour before close to see the attendant and got jostled by a parent running after their escaping toddler. The x-rays... Well, maybe it shouldn't be a surprise that at least one kid would know what metal looks like in an X-ray.

Sun is trying to redirect the children, but you're surrounded.

It took a little effort, but you finally manage to roll the heavy sleeves of your coveralls up, showing the thick ugly scars left from some of your surgeries. To your surprise, no one looks disgusted. And no one tries to touch them. There are questions, lots of questions.

"Did you get beaten up?" Head shake. "Can you talk?" Shrug. "Did you parachute out of a falling helicopter?" Something about your silence prompts the kids to speculate on more and more elaborate scenarios, all while you slowly sit to be more level with them.

To your surprise, a toddler walks up to you and hands you her Roxy doll. You blink and hold it loosely, using your thumb to push back the felt hair to see the bulging plastic eyes. One's been chewed on, a dog probably. The bite marks didn't look particularly human. When you look up, you manage a smile and notice that she has a scar too, on her cheek.

Oh.

You don't move until the last of the kids have gone home. Only about half of that is because you physically can't. Sun seems to realize that too, all but running over the moment the big doors close for the last time.

"I'm so dreadfully sorry Sunshine. I hadn't expected you to be over so early or else I would've been more aware. But Tommy just had to go find Chica..." Even as he speaks, he's helping you, hands curling around your chest and lifting you until you can safely straighten out your legs and stand. Even then, his hands linger, waiting until you pat one to pull away.

Once you can face him, you start to sign, hands a little shaky from all the attention. I finished early. Did not

You frown, not knowing how to say what you wanted without finger spelling.

"It's all right. So long as you're okay?" The way Sun's rays angle forward questioningly makes you want to smile again. You don't, but the feeling is there.

Instead, you nod and Sun hands you the folder with your X-rays safely contained again, and you walk over to the security desk to sit as was your habit now. You could sit and let the aches and pains of the day fade away for a couple hours, and Sun would teach you how to speak ASL. Because he is fluent. Because of course he is. He knows Mandarin too, but you decided together to tackle that later.

You scoot forward in the chair, pausing when you realize your sleeves are still rolled up. You almost never look at your skin, spending most of your time bundled up, so staring at it now is almost like looking at the arms of a stranger. You flex your wrist, watching the uneven skin move.

You roll your sleeves back down and check that your neck is still covered. Good.

If Sunny noticed anything was off, he didn't say, instead leaning down so he can prop his elbows on the upper part of the desk. "I didn't truly expect you to bring your pictures. I was only teasing since you get to see our insides all the time."

I want to. It was one of the first things you had him teach you to say. And it was, is true, if only because you felt you have to explain. You. Your body, why you don't talk anymore, why you're not good enough anymore. You open the folder, and the answers to all of that sit before you, the metal pinning your body together white against even against bone.

You don't look, not really, instead handing the pictures, neatly labelled with your name and body part, over, one by one. A hand, a foot. The side of your skull. There wasn't some part of you that hadn't needed stitching together, a skin graft there, a donated piece of liver from a sibling here. And staples, pins, and plates to force your bones to heal straight, to hide where part of your skull seemed to have disappeared, letting you function as you do. Slowly, painfully, here.

Sun isn't saying anything, though he does take each page as quickly as you pass it over. You watch for any tells, a flicker of his rays, the sound of his fan speeding up as he processes. But there's nothing, no tell, and did he already know? Was all this in a file he had access to and

"Oh Sunshine." It's the last x-ray, the back of your head, where the plate sits visibly off to one side. If you touch behind your ear hard enough, you swear you can feel the metal. "What happened to you?"

You don't really know how to respond. Your hands twitch, but you're not able to sign. You don't have the right words. So you dig for a notepoad and pen, writing carefully.

And oh, it hurts to see how much your handwriting changed since before.

It's a short story. I got in a car accident. Almost died. They pieced me back together. You shove the note to Sun to read, then keep going. I might have almost as much metal as you do at this point.

Sun is being hard to read still, though his rays have pulled back into his face, leaving tiny little points all around. His head is bowed, showing he's looking at the note still, but there's no way he's still reading. You stand, pulling at his faceplate, forcing him to look up.

"Ah, sorry. I was getting lost in thought. Can you come out from behind the desk?"

You are suspicious of that. Sunny, he almost never asked you to do something without some sort of explanation if it wasn't inherent in the request itself. But it's also Sun, and he hasn't hurt you. So you oblige, standing a fair few feet away.

Sun, for his part, sits cross-legged, holding a hand out to you. "It's okay. You trust us, right?"

You step forward, taking his hand, letting him lead you until you're standing with his legs crossed around you. You're taller this way, taller than even his uppermost ray, but you still feel small.

Sun's hand remains in yours, but his other is moving, touching the collar of your coveralls. "Can I?" You hesitate. "Only if you're comfortable."

You're not, not entirely. But you nod anyway, trying not to flinch when he finds the topmost button. It snaps loose easily. It's. Cheap. The coveralls are cheap. It shouldn't be a surprise, but your heart is racing too much for you to care.

You're wearing a thin t-shirt under the coveralls, nothing that can hide the scar from getting intubated. You let go of Sun's hand to hide your throat. "It's okay Sunshine. Come sit down. We'll take a break."

You nod quickly, and Sun helps you into his lap. Wrapping you in his arms. "Does this hurt?" You shake your head. "Good. Tell me if it does.'

You just sit there, leaning against Sun's torso, listening to the mechanics you kinda sorta understand now. Very kind of. You are a little more, uh, hyperaware of Sun's hand in your hair now. Tracing through it, finding the raised scar at the back of your head.

"A-ah." The noise you make isn't really a word so much as a panicked expectation. But his touch his delicate, almost ticklish. There's no pain, especially when he pulls away.

"Did that hurt?" You shake your head and look up, brow furrowed ever so slightly. "We're just... curious. You were pieced back together so carefully. We've never met someone like you before."

Carefully? You shake your head a little.

"No?" You reach out, and he takes your hand again. "No to us meeting someone like you?" Head shake. "Being pieced back together carefully." A nod. "I see. That would explain the scars on your arms?" You nod again, squeezing his hand. "We have scars too. Not everything can be buffed out."

He pulls at one of the ribbons tied around his wrists, the bells slipping free and rolling away. Hidden away is a soldering seam, as heavy and uneven as your own scars. You touch it lightly, then look up at him again. "It was an accident when we were still in the theater. The mechanic thought it would be a good idea to take the whole hand off when he lost a screwdriver." When you start to pull away, unsure, he shakes his head. "No, it's okay. It doesn't hurt. It's old anyway. We just don't heal like humans do."

You shrug out of your coveralls, tying the sleeves around your waist. Oh, mistake, mistake; it's freezing. You shiver even as Sun pulls a blanket (where did he get a blanket?) around you. "There you go. I don't think we've ever seen you not bundled up before."

There's a bump at the top of your forehead, and you blink at seeing how close Sun is now. You bump back. "Are you in pain very often?"

Oh. You grimace before nodding. "Is it from the metal?"

You're not sure how to answer that. You make a writing motion, and Sun can reach the paper he'd left up on the desk, letting you write using the back of his hand as a table. I wish that they hadn't put me back together like this. Every day hurts. And every day it feels like I've missed what I'm supposed to be doing.

"Oh Sunshine." He'd been reading over your shoulder. "I'm sorry you're in pain. It's always scary when something hurts, and it's not easy to forget when it's there all the time, is it?" You're staring down at the stripes in his pants, so you miss him moving his hand until it's cupping your cheek. "But, selfish as it is, I am very glad you're here. And for what it's worth, I don't think you've missed your potential at all."

The conversation feels incomplete, and even with the blanket, you're still cold thinking about the past, you shattered future. But Sun's filling your vision, pressing his face to yours, and you reach up to hold his rays, feeling them flex in your hands, the thick rubber malleable in your grip.

His hands find your wrists, and he holds you and it's now when you realize that you've fallen for an animatronic and honestly...

That's not such a bad thing at all.

-------

@pillowspace

this took a very abrupt turn from when I started it at work but I had to force myself to stop writing lest I end up making an entire novel just for this bit alone.

I don't know if I should tw this

#clone au

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melkyt · 1 month

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Soulmate au but where Luffy is a God, or patron of a god that believes assignment of soulmates is a stifling and plainly ridiculous way their kind controls humans, so it cuts the strings of those that choose to follow it, erases the tattoo and paints the world with color before the child even opens its eyes. Some take this as 'the god is my soulmate', which Nika is fine with as long as that's what that particular follower chose. They are unreachable, and they don't feel the same way humans do

Yet this is annoying for Luffy; he never cared for anyone in a romantic sense and didn't care that he didn't have a soulmate or even the opportunity to have one. It's whatever. he will know who he likes, if anyone, all on his own. If he ever likes someone, he would rather choose, so he is cool with that. Yet when it is revealed to the world that he is the vessel of Nika post-Wano, it gets complicated. People who thought they were soulmates of Nika suddenly have a target to go after, and it's worse than whatever Boa got.

So the Strawhats have to go on the run.

Then there is Law, friends with Luffy, he respects Luffy and anything feelings wise beyond that is complicated. He is used to keeping everyone at a distance to keep them safe, and old habits are hard to break, even when he knows Luffy can protect himself better than Law ever could. Still, he wants to help Luffy and stay with him.

Since Sabaody, since seeing Luffy punch the celestial dragon, he has seen flashes of color, hints of a string twisting around his fingers, and one of his tattoos twisting as if trying to be something else, the one at the center of his chest, whisps seem to burn around its edge if trying to burn into existence. Then they are gone, it is as if his soul cannot decide how to best help him find his other half.

Law is unnerved. The white lead long ate away at any hope he would ever meet anyone. Most soulmates come from the same island, with their own beliefs and presentation of the connection. Flevance being raised and citizens slaughtered, Law knows that his hope for love is buried in the rubble much like anything else.

Yet he forgets, or was never told in detail that the people of Flevance worshiped the sun god Nika, soulmates to them was a chain, so they would take many of their children to receive the blessing, to be cut off but with everything going on in the country, his parents never got to do it. Those that Nika talks to are far and few between, and they know when freedom is in danger, and they either leave or try to fight, which gets them killed. So Flavence went without before Law was born and after. Well, he had the stories his parents told him but nothing else.

So when he sees Nika, the world explodes in color for the first time. He is more than amazed, but he has to focus; they have a battle to fight.

Then the dust settles and the strawhats are gone, they had to run as Wano would not be safe for them. They have to hide Luffy until he can recover, those of them that are still able to stand go back to the Sunny. Yet they are in no shape to go anywhere.

Nami is seconds from passing out, but they have to go.

Then Law lands on the deck, having tracked them down with room.

At first Nami is terrified, he has the same almost crazed glint in his eyes as the others. She holds Luffy close and yells for him to stay back.

Law blinks, taking Luffy in, he is back to the same old, black curls around a soft, exhausted face. The only sign of Nika that was there are white streaks in his hair. Law stumbles back, shakes of the trance with a spark of his Haki. "I'll help you get out"

Nami relaxes now that he is back to his senses.

Law stays by Luffy's side, treating his injuries, and trying to understand just what he feels. Is Luffy his soulmate, or was it just Nika's effect? Does he want Luffy to be his soulmate? Law can't lie that he has feelings since the first day, but what if this is not a choice but the effect of gods playing games with his life yet again

Thats when Nika speaks to him. Its a loud bouncing voice. Law doubles over in pain, clutching his skull as its words ring. It tells him that it dont play games and as he was born one of its children so many years ago before the city was taken from its control, that it will show him freedom

And it does, it shows him how Flevance was before its fall, shows his parents childhood, and how they believed in Nika and believed that one day Joyboy would come back, and how they hoped their son would get to see this new era of freedom. How they hope they could even be friends, as any child carrying the weight of a god will need it.

When Luffy wakes up, he finds Law crying on the floor, hit with the past and the future, its alot for one man to handle. Nor does it answer his questions.

Luffy, who can barely move, plops on the ground. He crawls over to Law poking him on the cheek, asking whats wrong. Law flinches again as Nika laughs.

Luffy blinks and straight up tells it to stop bothering Traffy, 'he's not used to you being so dam loud'

Law wipes away his tears now that his mind is quiet. 'You hear that all the time?'

'Since I nommed fruit' Luffy shrugs. 'Its funny, we hang out' he shrugs, it also helps him alot when he needs it. 'They like you'

"Luffy, I..." Law contemplating just telling Luffy everything, most of his walls are down, this is as good a chance as he will get without getting in his own way "Do you ever think about soulmates?"

"Mmm nah, i get to choose if I wanna kiss someone!" Luffy nods, stretching, trying to cross his legs but hus injuries keep him from doing so, so he just puts them over Law's lap, making the other man blush. "Do you got a soulmate?"

"Maybe," He looks away from Luffy

"Do you want one?" Luffy tilts his head "Nika can tell you who they are"

"It can!?" Law leans closer to Luffy, studying his gaze to see if he means it. He does, somehow that feels worse. Does that mean he has someone else out there after all, that he cant choose Luffy? "Nevermind" He sighs

Luffy blinks then chuckles. "Do you want it to be me, Traffy?" His grin widens as he scoots closer, sitting all the way in Law's lap, wrapping his arms around the mans neck.

"Yes -- No, what--" Law sputters, words leaving him.

"I like you too, Torao" Luffy nuzzles closer, and promptly falls asleep, having used up all his energy, leaving Law in an awkward position and blushing like he has never done before.

Law sighs and settles in, maybe once Luffy wakes up. He can say that he feels the same way.

It is days before he does. They move to the polar tang and hide the Sunny as they cant leave Wano until everyone is healthy, and whatever effect Nika had is fading on the people. So it gets calmer, Law when he is not by Luffy's side does damage control with his power, helping people snap out of it and patching up wounds.

When Luffy wakes up, he hesitates in saying it. Words are difficult when you struggle believe that you are worth it

Luffy doesn't push, but from that point, anytime anyone asks, those that believe Nika, especially, if he is with anyone, Luffy answers that, yeah! Traffy is his boyfriend!

It is a few situations like this before Law is within earshot of this announcement. He absolutely melts and acts all grumbly like he does but is happy 😊

They never discuss it in detail, as thats who they are but they do fall into a routine that is natural, and Law while still wondering the nature of soulmates, is okay with not knowing as Luffy chose him out of everyone in the world.

Luffy chose him and thats enough.

#lawlu #one piece au

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elcpsstuff · 1 year

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The Summer I Remembered You (C.F) (Part 20)

even when I don’t, I almost do. Because I love you.

—

A/N: You guys i’m actually sobbing while writing this! The last part is here and i’m honestly feeling so many emotions right now. From the first chapter to now seeing how every character as grown just makes my heart absolutely melt ahh. This is the last part but when season 3 comes out who knows, there might be a sequel;) (no promises) !! I love you all sooo much and please enjoy this really long chapter <3

—

There’s not many ways to categorize Susannah. She’s not just a mother figure to me. She’s the beach house on sunny days and all weather accompanied and when I do a lot of things I think about her.

I’ll never forget the day my parents died. I might have been young but it’s one of the first things I remember. John and Laurel running to the house with Steven and Belly in the car, and a confused 6 year old waiting for her parents to get home. Come home to me.

Apparently, therapy sessions are the way to fix someone who was categorized as broken like me. I got taken to countless different therapists but what was I supposed to say? Like ‘yeah i’m pretty sad about my parents dying but i’ll get over it.’

The first summer that went by without my parents, I went to the beach house. I had gone two times before that but this time was truly my first visit. To me it was.

I don’t remember much, but I do remember Susannah. According to her (and laurel) I cried for hours in my room, assuming it was about my parents. Everybody left me alone until my whales became too loud and Susannah couldn’t help but step in.

She walked into my room, not forgetting to shut the door and sat on the edge of my bed. “Yn? Sweetie?”

“Y- yeah?” I covered my tears in hopes that I would just look groggy from a nap but I obviously failed, miserably.

“What’s going on?” She cooed at me while brushing some strands of hair out my face.

“I miss them.. my.. my—”

“I know you do. I’m sorry it had to be this way yn..” I still remembered her voice to this day, in that room. It was so soothing sometimes I requested her to come in and talk to me before bed.

“Can I tell you something yn?”

I nodded weakly, “mhm..”

She held me in her arms while whispering a soft melody in my ear before saying; “This beach house is as much yours as mine. Okay? Your here and apart of us now. Of me.”

I smiled at the thought before falling deep asleep.

I was always close with Susannah after that, as much as I could be. Sometimes summer wasn’t enough.

Now, i’m sobbing all my makeup off into the sheets Susannah picked out for this house. Conrad really was right when he said it— she’s everywhere and everything in this house. Picked out ever wall color and every single piece of furniture.

I used to love to look at the things Susannah did for this house, it reminded me of her. Now- I can’t even look at the walls without crying. Because soon she’ll only be a memory.

Belly’s cries in my ear were more heartbreaking than I could have imagined. Me, Belly, and Laurel were all stuck together on the bed like peas in a pod. Laurel crying was something I never thought I would see and now I wished I hadn’t.

“I just feel so stupid. This whole summer has been about me and Susannah had been dying of cancer.”

I almost wanted to tell Belly not to, not to say it. She had no right. But she did, because she really really was dying. That was the reality of the matter. I can only imagine Jeremiah and Conrad if we’re crying this bad. It breaks my heart.

“That’s how she wanted it though,” Laurel whispers, “One last perfect summer in cousins.”

One last perfect summer. Was this the end? It hit me then, maybe it was the end. Conrad would be going off to college in the fall and me, Jeremiah, and Steven were all going into our senior years. Even Belly was growing. She wasn’t far off from college either.

“It’s just not fair,” I add in, sobbing through my words. “Why does she have to go? It’s.. it’s..”. Horrible. Not fair. So many things that I want to say but my choked cries hold me back.

The door creaks open and a very sad looking Steven creeps into the room. His eyes are draped and tears stained his face. Shakily, he said, “She’s not gonna get better is she?”

When Laurel shakes her had no, my cries come faster as well as Belly’s. Steven runs to the other side of the bed and climbs in next to Laurel, tears dripping on her red dress. He was like a little kid, the way he got into bed and held onto Laurel for dear life, like every child held their mother.

It was just us 3, crying and crying and repeated murmurs of ‘it’s not fair’ and an occasional I love you.

—

Laurel cooking only meant one thing, we were fucked.

It’s no secret Susannah’s cooking has always been a fan favorite of ours, and not Laurel’s.

We all gathered around the table and for the first time this summer we felt like family. True and honest family. Me and Belly had changed from our dresses because Susannah didn’t want us to be uncomfortable, but the boys were still in their tuxes.

Everyone’s eyes were littered with dry tears and everybody was also blood shot red in the eyes. I’d never seen Conrad look so tired and broken, it almost makes me feel horrible for crying so hard.

He still looked good though, really good.

“Okay, guys.” Susannah clears her throat before gently pushing out of her seat, getting our attention.

“I.. I think,” Susannah’s eyes wonder to Jeremiah and Conrad before she speaks. Her face is glowing with a smile only Susannah has. It’s for her boys. Conrad and Jeremiah.

Jeremiah was her sunshine boy, the kind’ve boy that still hugged their mother even though they were probably too old for it. He was good to her. Not that Conrad wasn’t, not at all. It was just different. Conrad affection was deep and hidden but Susannah could pull it out of him. He would do anything for her, absolutely anything even if he hated it.

“I think i’m gonna do the trial.” Conrad and Jeremiah’s face lit up in smiles that I had missed dearly and mine wasn’t too far behind. It might have been a long shot, but it was hope. Hope that things could be okay. It’s no secret things would never be the same again, but if we could be okay, that was good enough for me. For all of us.

“It’s gonna work, mom.” Jeremiah says with pleading eyes and my heart can’t help but melt at the sight. He always had so much hope that things would work out, and as much as I wanted to believe him, I knew it all to well. I didn’t wanna think about it, though. Because loosing Susannah would be like loosing my parents all over again, but worse. I know Susannah, more than I ever knew them.

“It doesn’t matter,” Susannah grabs Laurel’s hand and squeezes it tight, “You all ate here. It’s the best thing I could ever ask for.”

And with that, we ate.

For the first time since the news came out, laughter filled this table. It filled our lungs and our hearts and I never missed Jeremiah and Stevens jokes. Conrad even threw one in occasionally.

This was good. We were gonna be okay.

Dinner came and went and it was late by the time we finished, but I was up like a hawk. At 11 o’click the house started winding down and yawns were heard.

I walked into the kitchen to grab my phone, only to see Jeremiah sitting at the counter. I knew I needed to talk to him. It was a long time coming.

“Hey..” I say quietly, but it was loud enough for him to hear me.

He smiles lightheartedly, “Hey.” I did not want to know if he was angry at me still because it would hurt too much. Jeremiah was amazing at holding grudges, which shouldn’t be a compliment but it sure does drive the other person crazy.

“So,” I tap my fingers across the counter in a state of worry, “Are.. we good?”

A sigh comes from his mouth, and I only can hope he’s not up to fight, because I sure as hell aren’t. “Did you know about Susannah’s cancer? Did Conrad tell you?” Those were the last words I expected to come out his mouth.

He was there, when I asked what was going on. How could he assume I knew? Was he that angry about me and Conrad that he would accuse me of hiding it?

“How could you even think that?” There’s no disgust in my voice, just pure sadness. He was bitter, bitter that he didn’t know. Don’t let him get to you.

“You and Conrad kept a lot of secrets, what’s one more?” Unlike me, his voice is laced with disgust and after the night I had tonight, I would be the last to deal with it.

“Right. Glad to know where you stand.” I spin on my heel but before I can reach the door a shriek comes out of Jeremiah’s mouth.

“I liked you, you know.”

I turn around and look at the boy in front of me with a puzzled face. He liked me? Are you serious?

Where was he when I wanted his attention? I remember the nights I would long for Jeremiah, when I believed Conrad didn’t want me. I might have longed for Jeremiah to try and forget about Conrad, but I still longed for him.

“Don’t do that. You like Belly.”

He shakes his head and my heart begins to accelerate.

“I know you used to like me too.” What was he saying? Assuming? This was crazy. Just fucking crazy and my brain can’t handle any more of this. “I know it was one summer. Conrad and you weren’t talking as much because he was busy with football camp. You got crazy jealous of me talking to Belly. I- I never believed I had a chance with you yn, so I never showed that I cared. But I did.”

It’s true. The summer Conrad was going into Sophomore year his dad had him on a constant grind for football. Make no mistake, I missed him like hell but I did gather some sort of feeling for Jeremiah during that time. It lingered, but as soon as Conrad came it was gone.

None of us were perfect. If Belly had some sort of attraction for both of the boys, would it be so crazy to believe I once did too? Not too long ago?

But it’s always been clear as day, who I loved. Love.

I always believed love would be gray with anyone else but Conrad. He made it golden. Shades of gray hidden in the sunset that would only come out for me, along with my feelings for him.

What was I supposed to say? He wasn’t wrong. I did like him a little bit, even at the beginning of this summer. But it was only because I hid my truth about Conrad. I needed to get away from him and shamefully, Jeremiah was right there.

“If I wouldn’t known- I would’ve maybe—”

“Jeremiah, stop.”

His eyes widen and this is the last thing I want. To cause this poor boy any more drama than what’s been produced. His face turns from hopeful and pleading to knowing. All fucking knowing.

“You love him, don’t you?”

My heart beat slows, and I look Jeremiah dead in the eye, making sure he knows the truth. I want him to know so we can get over this because I need Jeremiah, my buddy. Not a lover.

“I think I almost do.” Is all I can manage to say.

Jeremiah says nothing but only nods in response. It’s quiet for a moment before I begin to tread away, only to be stopped again.

“Just tell me this, if I would’ve confessed, would it had changed anything?”

No. It wouldn’t have.

“It’s been a long day, Jeremiah.” I don’t hear a response as I tread up the stairs.

—

My feet tread on the wooden floors, creaking noises coming every now and then. It was late. Half past 12 and like most nights lately, sleep couldn’t consume me like it used to be able to.

Luckily, I wasn’t alone.

Outside my door, I peered through another to see Susannah sat on her bed. She looked sad, so unlike Susannah. Something compelled me to walk in there.

Susannah was sitting on her bed staring up at the ceiling. It was almost weird— seeing her look so solemn. Like she had come to peace with it.

She smiled at me when I walked in and motioned for me to take the spot next to her on the bed. I did.

“Cant sleep?” She whispers.

I shake my head rapidly, because I can’t. I cant sleep knowing a women like Susannah is being put through this. She’s so pure, so pure in a world of evil.

“I don’t mean to bother you.”

“You could never bother me, special girl.” I already feel the tears coming on my face, and one stray tear dripped. I wiped it quickly.

“I’m so sorry, Susannah.” I sit next to her quickly. Her face turns sad and droopy which was the last thing I intended considering this day already didn’t go as planned. I needed to change the mood. “How.. how is Conrad? Is he okay?”

An all knowing smile reaches Susannah’s face, and I already know what’s coming next. “He’s doing okay. I hated him seeing him cry. I always do.”

That was the truth. I hated seeing Conrad cry too. It had only happened a couple of times, and It would always take me 15 minutes or so to recover from it. The way his eyes cried for help and were bloodshot red, almost like he was begging for someone to save him. I had wanted that for years. To save him and to be engulfed in his arms.

“I hate it too.” I whisper and a choked sob comes out of my mouth. Susannah, being Susannah notices right away. Always putting others above herself.

“He’s loved you since he was 10, you know.” Now it was her turn to speak through a yelp and cry. I broke at the sight. Tears were streaming down both of our faces but I was too delirious to care. “He came up to me, called you so pretty at a young age. You’ve always been his weakness, you know that.”

I shrug, “Things got really complicated Susannah, too quick and too fast.”

“Don’t let him push you away. He loves you. He’s in love with you.” Those words spilled all over me like a warm shower. Lathering me in love and affection, all by the man Conrad Fisher.

Susannah holds my arm, rubbing my thumb gently, “Do.. do you love him too?”

I don’t even wait, I just nod. Nod and nod until my head feels like it’s hurting because I do. I really do. He’s everything to me. It’s not often you find your lover and best friend in one.

He really is my everything. My Conrad.

“Yes.”

Susannah pulls me in and now i’m sobbing against her chest. Who cares if the house hears? This women is dying in front of me and i’ll i’ve done this whole summer is be consumed in my own drama. Belly was right, even if we didn’t know it we were selfish.

“I’m so sorry, I was so— selfish.”

I feel Susannah move her head against me. “No, no. This is how I wanted it. I wanted it to be about you girls. And the guys. I wanted all the petty fights and talk about boys because that’s what summer is to you guys. A time to just be.”

She was right. Summer was intertwined with everything good in my life. Conrad, Susannah, Jeremiah, and the rest of my family. From running on the beach at 7 and playing with the football and attempting to crash the boys plans with Belly at night. It was all so good. So right.

Susannah pulls me out of her chest and tucks a hair behind my ear, “Yn. I know this hasn’t always been easy. But your here now, okay? One day, when I’m gone—" I go to fight her but she shakes her head, silencing me. “When i’m gone, it’s up to you and Belly to keep the magic going. If anyone can, it’s you two.”

I hoped and prayed. I really did.

“Your my special girl, yn.”

We hugged for what felt like hours, crying and holding each other. Around 1am, I crept into bed, sobs occasionally catching my lips every now and then. My heavy eyes slowly found it’s way into some sort of sleep.

—

The tide was low in the morning.

I wouldn’t exactly call it sleep, what I got. More like an hour or so of being in this dream state. Where susannah was okay and wasn’t dying and that we would be coming to cousins like normal. Every summer.

He was there. In his suit still looking like a work of art. Straight out of a Taylor Swift love song (wildest dreams, to be exact. I would always rant to Frankie about how that’s his song.)

His hair was sloppy in the wind and his shirt was all wrinkled. That’s the thing about Conrad though. Even in the worst of times, he still looks beautiful. His blue irises don’t shine the same blue that Jeremiah’s does.

Conrad is dark. Dark dark dark and some more. Jeremiah’s blue ocean eyes hold some sense of purity to them. I could even get lost in them. They’re so bright with purpose. When I looked into Conrad’s eyes, the blue was different. So confusing and at times I feel like one day it’ll devour me.

He was a deep guy, Conrad. Something Jeremiah would never be, even if he tried his hardest to mold that personality of his. I could sit for hours and talk about the meaning of life with Conrad and he would sit and stare, maybe adding in his thoughts. Jeremiah would go on his phone within minutes.

It wasn’t a bad thing, that Jeremiah didn’t do that. He wasn’t Conrad, he shouldn’t have to be. But even If I tried to tell him that it would be too late, the complex already set so horribly in. No matter what anyone does it’ll be ingrained in him. I just hoped it wouldn’t consume him.

I plopped down next to him, digging my feet into the sand from how nervous I was. I didn’t know what he was gonna say to me.

There was a small gap between us, one that was definable but not to an extent. Conrad played with his fingers and for a moment it was just pure silence.

I liked the waves. They were calming.

“I can’t believe she said yes.” Conrad words are vibrant, more than they had been this entire summer. His face twisted into a smile and my heart melted at the sight.

I awkwardly look down towards the sand and make a little heart in it. “I mean- it’s all thanks to you. You changed her mind, Conrad.”

He shakes his head, “No, no, it was Jere. Not me.”

I gulp down the words that itch to come out of my throat, so many things I want to say. Where do I start? I’ve been in love with you since I was 10 years old. It’s only been you? Even when my heart tried to make me believe it was Jeremiah or possibly Josh, it was always you. How do I tell him that after everything?”

The silence became noticeable because he twisted his lips like he always does when he feels guilty or is out of words to say, to fill the void.

“I’m sorry for being so shitty, this entire summer.”

“I mean.. you were going through this all alone. I- it couldn’t have been easy..” I try and reason for him because I do feel horrible. It doesn’t excuse anything, but it makes it all just sorta make sense.

“Doesn’t make it right. Not for you, at least.”

His tone conveys something much more intimate than either of us are ready to take on right now. I get up off the sand, Conrad following my actions suit.

“Conrad… you- you really need someone right now and I just.. can’t be the person you fall on. Not after everything.” By everything, the love i’ve held for this boy. All the years and lies and the time we even had sex, it’s all too much. He’s either in or out, I can’t climb over and pull him half way. That’s on him.

“I need you.”

I shake my head again, “No. No more needing.” Want. I want him to want me. He reads my mind before tucking a strand behind my face.

“I want you. You know that.”

“How?” I whisper.

“Because I love you. I’ve been in love with you since I was 12. I- I don’t know when it happened, but one day it just came to me. I can’t shake it since. Maybe it was always there.”

Conrad fucking Fisher, pouring his heart out was not to go unnoticed. Rare were the times he showed emotion, and for anyone to take it to granted was crazy.

“And you think I haven’t?” My whisper is almost like a cry. Hadn’t it been so obvious? I loved this boy with every fiber in my body. My heart called to him. He was better than Noah from the notebook and better than Rhett. He was Conrad.

“I know you have. But I do too, I really do.”

Conrad’s fingers graze my cheek and I look up into his impossibly blue eyes. He flinches a little before moving in closer to me. My eyes linger to his lips and his does the same.

When our lips touch, I could’ve cried from the feeling. It was much different than any other time. It wasn’t needy or so heart gripping I didn’t think I would survive it, it was calm.

His hands cupped my face and we pull away for a brief moment. I don’t miss the smile he gives me before pulling me in for another one. I wrap my arms around his waist and he’s really making all the moves. Eventually I find myself playing with the backs of his hairs.

When we pull away, he still holds me, almost afraid to let go. A small laugh escapes my lips.

“What?” He says so softly yet amused.

“Nothing, I just…” Everything.

“I can’t believe your really here.”

—

Leaving cousins was always the worst. The packing, looking at the house once last time before returning for 9 months. This time as different though.

Fall comes round always too quick for my liking, almost like the seasons trying to rid out memories of summer. But summer was intertwined in all of our memories like a cord. Nothing would sever that.

Steven was an early acceptance into Princeton. After all of his hard work, Steven accomplished his 4 year old dream of walking down the school halls shouting that he got into Princeton.

Belly was doing good. Her grades were always subpar like mine which was something we always bonded about. Always lifting each other up when Steven drowns us with his smart antics.

And me? I’m currently sat in my car parked in the parking lot for Brown.

Conrad told me he’d meet me by these benches that he sent me a picture of, so I guess I would have to gauge off of that.

Once I got out of the car, I grabbed my bag of necessities while closing the door and locking the car. I smiled to myself and for a moment I was lost. Just fucking lost.

I can’t believe you’re really here.

Those words clung with me like the dust hangs to my shirt. That day is forever ingrained in my memory. I’ll never forget that moment, no matter what happens. It was almost like a promise, that this was really the beginning.

I began to walk through the crowd of people, searching aimlessly. I would spot him out in a heartbeat, but there were a shit ton of people.

That’s when I saw him, in this cute little stripped polo top, looks down at his phone. I’m guessing it was to text me but the excitement that fills my body is blocking off all of my conscious.

When he looks up, the biggest fucking smile covers his face. I start walking towards him and drop my bags, running into his arms.

“You’re here.” He mumbles into my shoulder. He was feeling me, I understand why. I had to touch his hairs to make sure he’s real too. But he his.

“Yeah, i’m here.”

Conrad takes my bag like the gentlemen he is, and the whole walk to his room he’s staring at me. I meet his eyes occasionally but look away for the most part.

Once we get to his room, I can’t help but notice how neat his side is compared to his roommates, Trusky. He wasn’t here, but It was obvious to tell who’s sides who.

“I was thinking we could maybe go for lunch or something?” Conrad places my bag down and then kicks his foot lightly against the wood of his desk. He looked like a little kid asking for a cookie.

“Whatever you want.” I say with a innocence to my voice.

Conrad smirks and I shut the door behind us. When I turn around, Conrad wraps his arms around me and spins me around lightly. I can’t help the giggle that emerges.

Conrad throws me on the bed right before laying down next to me. “I missed you so much.”

“Me too.” The glimmer in both of our eyes is something I would carry with me. The hope, the want. I knew this was our start, just the very first page. A sea of blue was conjuring in his eyes, and I was about to be sucked into it.

Instead of going to lunch, me and Conrad lost track of time and talked and kissed and did some more talking. It was refreshing.

“How’s Belly?” Conrad asks me.

I shrug, “She’s good. I mean, we’re good. I think her and Jere have been talking a lot.” Conrad raises his eyebrows and licks his lips. “You know what? I swore I heard them talking when I came over to the house last weekend.”

I smirk, “I think she’s happy.”

“He is too.”

The second me and Conrad got together, I told him about what Jeremiah said to me. He had told me not to worry and that Jeremiah was just being emotional.

But seeing Jeremiah so happy, it makes me happy. Belly, too. I think it warms us all a bit that we can all just, be.

“I talked to your mom the other day.”

A radiant smile, only that he shares for Susannah peaks through cracks of Conrad’s mouth. “Ah, really? What’d she say?”

“Said shes doing good. Also said your a fucking goofball.”

“Fuck you!” Conrad smacks my forehead lightly, always making sure not to legitimately hurt me. I loved that about him. “Hey, I have an idea.”

“What?”

I can’t believe this man.

When Conrad said he knew a place, I didn’t really know what he was talking about. I just went with the flow.

Only Conrad fucking Fisher would take me stargazing. That part of my heart was left for him. Only for him. He places a blanket on the grass and motions me to sit down with him.

It was a deserted little place, 20 minutes away from the campus. It was cozy.

I lay down next to Conrad and a small breeze hits me, making me shiver. Conrad wraps his arms around me almost instinctively, placing a kiss on top of my forehead.

“This is nice.” I breathe out.

“mhm.” Conrad hums and every now and then he places kisses on my cheeks and lips. I don’t stop him.

“I love you.” He mumbles in between kisses and eventually the kisses become more needy, more wanting. I felt the deja vu running through my veins.

Conrad slips a hand under my shirt and I pull away quickly. His face turns a crimson shade of red that even I can see in the night, “Fuck— I’m sorry—”

“No, no.” I place my hands on his shoulder. “I just uh—you’re the only.. my um.”

“Oh.” Conrad nods his head in understanding.

“I just, promise me it won’t be like last time?” Even though i knew this was clearly different, I don’t know if I’d ever be able to forget that night. It’s ingrained in my head, everything. Every move, motion, the way his hands curved my body, everything.

“I promise.” I smile and my hands slip under his shirt, slowly taking it off. His body was good, really good. Conrad always was beautiful but in the night was when I found him most enchanting. The way his jaw was extra defined and how his hair fell down.

Conrad is slow to pull my top off, and he stares at me in the thick of the night. “You’re beautiful.”

“Your stuttering, Fisher, have you lost you’re touch?”

“Oh your in for it now.” Conrad leans down and kisses me neck, inching down to my collar bone and a soft moan escapes my lips.

This was beautiful, he was beautiful.

My childhood best-friend, my Conrad.

I’d love him forever, every single part of him. I’ve laughed, Cried, hell, i’ve done so many things for him. But this is the beginning, I know it is.

I lean down to look at the infinity necklace hanging off of my chest, which Conrad has traced circles around. It’s true, I would go endlessly around those curves for him.

I hit myself thinking about how badly i wanted to forget him, but this summer only made me remember him.

Conrad Fisher.

—

THATS IT YALLLL!! I’m crying rn this story means so much to meeee :)) I can’t say it’s fully over because who knows what the future holds (thanks for the quote belly) But i love you all so much and I hope to have more projects soon! Also love that cheesy ass ending 🫶🏻

tag list: @kkrenae @callsignwidow @drikawinchester @johannelis2302nely @allnrsnz @galaxy13sworld @paytonloiselle @i-think-you-are-gr8 @imaspecialpersonwhoneedshelp @awatt31 @user0440822 @jackierose902109 @chocolatefartstrawberry @whoisjellyellie @apollo3475 @watercolorskyy

(tag list never works ugh)

#the summer i turned pretty #conrad fisher #jeremiah fisher #team conrad #belly conklin #conrad x reader #team jeremiah #tsitp #love #summer love #Spotify

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