#she embraced her role so fervently that now she just IS an ideal and cannot escape that

[girlbob-boypants]

As time has gone on I have gotten more obsessed with Marika's whole narrative haunting thing to the point where I'm finally pretty satisfied with her not being the final boss

[laviniadeconde]

☆ ━ ━ OUT OF THE WAY ! can’t you see LAVINIA DE CONDE, the TUDOR COURT PAINTER of TURKEY coming this way ? I hear SHE is FLIRTATIOUS, but also SUPERFICIAL. SHE seems to remind everyone of FLOWERS SCATTERED OVER MOONLIT WATERS, A PEARL STILL IN ITS SHELL, .&. PAINT SMUDGES ON DELICATE HANDS. hopefully one day SHE will succeed in HER ambition to KEEP FAVOR AT COURT, but then again, the court is a dangerous place. one can only hope SHE will keep HER head… ( MERVE BOLUĞUR  ) ━ ━ ☆ as written by DAISY ;; EST, SHE/HER, 22 .

Historical Inspirations: Levina Teerlinc, Lavinia Fontana

Levina Teerlinc (1510s - 1576) was a Flemish painter and miniaturist who lived in the Renaissance. Widely regarded as one of the most important artists of the Tudor court, Levina served the English courts under the reigns of Henry VIII, Edward VI, Mary I, and Elizabeth I.

Lavinia Fontana (1552 - 1614) was an Italian painter who is regarded as the first female artist working in the same capacity as her male counterparts, outside of a royal court or religious convent. She was the first female artist to paint female nudes, and possibly the first female to use live nude female models.

AU History:

[ trigger warnings for mentions of sex, miscarriage/loss of baby, and parental death ;]

With such a strict upbringing, it is wholly surprising that Lavinia Efendi grew up with naught more but freedom in her heart, her words and thoughts wrapping themselves into poetry and song. The daughter of an Ottoman ambassador and a French countess, Lavinia discovered her talent for turning observation into art at a young age, her bouts of childlike fixation on the exquisite remedying itself in the examination and creation of art itself. As the daughter of world-travelers, the young girl often awoke to chambers filled with color and splendor, discovering different landscapes and new skylines with each city her father was tasked to visit, the nomadic lifestyle simultaneously an expansion of her boundaries and knowledge, and a contributing factor to her restlessness and inability to simply settle.

Her mother often lamented the fact that, of the two jobs women should hold (being pretty and sitting still), her daughter only ever managed to accomplish the former. Pretty was easy, but stillness, a forever-escaping ideal. There was no stillness when so many lovely things were around her, and her adolescence was one of self-made adventures, of finding a new escape in unexplored castle corners and mud-soaked peasant streets alike, as well as in their respective inhabitants. Her tendency to simply follow an interesting, beautiful thing stirred up disappointment in her parents, who believed the worst of their daughter and feared she had been stripped of her virtue before being presented for marriage opportunities within both the Ottoman and French courts.

The pursuit of various romances and trysts existed, of course, though they were not the sole reason for the excursions that persisted throughout her late adolescence. The girl, despite obvious beauty and the innate sensibilities that came along with a privileged background, found it easy to blend into her surroundings through her ease in presence alone. While her aptitude for chameleon-like charm went largely unnoticed by the royals and courtiers who almost always surrounded her, the locals were quick to consider her one of their own, teaching her peasant songs and drinking games without hesitation. It was never her plan to find a new lover in each new city, and neither a simple kiss nor the pleasure-pain of a song caused the ‘typical’ reactions of shame within her body or her mind, aligning herself explicitly with pursuits of freedom and beauty. In her mind, love was meant to be felt, to be experienced, and often -- as often as possible.

At eighteen, her father relocated the family back to France in order for  Lavinia to pursue a proper education in art, his hope being that the stricter French lifestyle would iron out her proclivity towards the wild, and subdue any and all tendencies she had towards romances with anyone other than a suitor he approved of. For four years, she lived the way he requested of her, devoting her life to art and poetry -- a life of beauty, to be sure, but one restricted in its endeavors and unsubstantial in terms of fulfillment. For a girl who knew only how to live with freedom shadowing every step she took, the greatest restriction came upon her father’s death, a sudden iron tether to the reality that she would have to marry in order to secure her family’s wealth and their position within French society.

Her mother, before her untimely death, worked quickly to present her to the French court as her world-traveled, exotic beauty of a daughter, a talented conversationalist and even better artist, hiding entirely the girl’s history of indiscretions while living in the Ottoman territories. She attracted several suitors, though none quite held her attention the way that Antoine de Conde did, his charismatic way of speaking enchanting her entirely and inspiring a deeper passion than she’d ever held for any of the men or women before. At twenty-three, she was married to the ambassador, perfectly in love with him even while finding herself still attracted to beauty in all forms.

The first affairs started quietly after their first year of marriage. In her hopes to find new muses to spur on her creativity in the wake of both her parent’s death and the suddenness of married life, Lavinia sought men and women of great beauty to soothe the distress she did not know how to present to her husband. Unlike the trysts of her past, this time was not just for the experience or to test her own boundaries, but as a means of clinging onto something familiar when everything seemed shaken and ripped away from her -- or, perhaps, as a way to simply be anything but what she was: an orphaned woman married to a man she may have loved, but did not truly know. The hedonistic, freedom-seeking girl of her youth was not lost entirely, but simply buried under the earth of newly-married life and all the trappings of societal expectation and reputation. 

As the years have passed on, however, Lavinia has found herself returning more to the innocently reckless free spirit she once was, though only time will tell if the King, the Tudor court, or even her husband will cast her from their good graces and into a world with no safety net, and no freedom to exist exactly as she pleases.

Additional:

When it comes to her indiscretions, there is a part of her that does feel (somewhat) guilty for her actions. She understands that her affairs are not acceptable to the society she now finds herself in, but refuses to accept their reasoning and adopt their refusal as her own. Her guilt mainly stems from the fact that she does love the man she married, and she knows that this marriage is likely not what he had hoped for. For Lavinia, Antoine is the first one to inspire in her what can only be love, a distinct blend of both passion and respect, and an endless fascination with his mind. Still, not only is it currently impossible for Lavinia to resist her innate tendencies towards hedonism, but the idea of limitation of one’s experiences is one she will always rebel against. 

Prior to rumors of her indiscretions swirling about court, Lavinia was granted a position of ‘Court Painter’ to the Tudor Court, which she takes great pride in. Others may slander her or speak ill behind her back, but no one can speak negatively of the woman’s work, which has been thoroughly praised by the previous King and current King alike. Due to her success within the artistic realm, the King has also appointed her as art tutor to the young ladies of the royal family. She greatly enjoys this role, and finds she is at her most peaceful when she is around children.

Lavinia fervently longs to have children and raise a family. In the past, she has had trouble carrying the baby to term, but has kept her fertility issues private -- not even her husband knows that she has gotten pregnant, let alone suffered a miscarriage. While she will likely always crave freedom, she cannot deny that there is something entirely appealing at the prospect of starting a family and raising little ones to embrace themselves fully, and carry themselves with dignity and grace.

Essentials:

Name: Lavinia de Conde (nee Efendi)

Position: Tudor Court Painter

Nationality: Turkish, French (through marriage)

DOB: May 21, 1508

Birthday: May 21, 1508

FC: Merve Bolugur

᛫ art heaux  ᛫ honestly, a hot mess. wants to be loved but doesn’t subscribe to societal conventions of love, which in turn limits the way she can receive love. ᛫ fights in the form of pouts and whines, never knows how to express her anger or frustration ᛫ gives the impression of an airhead, though her original thought often hides behind poetry to mask her more intellectual, ever-examining nature ᛫ falls in love every day with someone new (im paraphrasing Hozier here) ᛫ does actually feel guilty about how her indiscretions have negatively impacted her husband! ᛫ “limitations? i don’t know her.” -- lavinia de conde, probably + imaginative, artistic, charming, free-spirited, mischievous - selfish, superficial,  childish, air-headed, reckless

[whatisonthemoonarchive]

Moon's most important speech revisited

The following was a post here over one year ago. It is excerpts from Moon's speech to the members after Nan Sook Hong and his daughter Un Jin appeared on the 60 Minutes show with Mike Wallace. It is rather revealing especially in light of what we now know about Moon's personal life.

http://whatisonthemoon.tumblr.com/post/154863073384/the-most-important-speech-of-sun-myung-moon-the#notes

I will list the excerpts below with my own comments in Parentheses. Enjoy.

Frank F

http://www.tparents.org/UNews/PDF/Unws9810.pdf

Rev. Sun Myung Moon - September 21, 1998 (EXCERPTS)

What does truth mean? Does it change? (No) Do you know truth? (Yes) What is it? (DP) Yes, but the DP itself is a written text, not perfect truth.

Can we find any perfect, righteous person in the world? We judge each other as nice and honest, or cold, but is that right to do?

Those who oppose the UC say it is satanic, with a lot of secrets, that I am the king of thieves and liars. After you have heard that, why do you still follow me?

(Excellent intro Moon. Good bye.)

The truth never changes.

We have five senses, each taking four years to form a perfect four position foundation, equaling twenty years.

What of the person who proclaims himself a great UC leader, and then turns into a great proponent of the position that the UC is a bad place? That person is Satan.

(Fair enough. Why should it take so long for someone to figure out they are being abused. We get it. Now please explain why church doctrine, policy, directives and even the name gets changed periodically?)

Have I ever criticized or blamed anyone? When it was the USA as plaintiff and I as the defendant, who criticized whom? The USA criticized me.

(Oh I can recall a lot of criticism and blame coming from Moon. Even in this speech. If the U.S. government didn't have a case, why did they bring it?)

Communists attacked me, but in the end they said I am innocent. I was imprisoned in the 1950s and the entire government mobilized to dig up crimes they could attribute to me, but they found nothing and I was released innocent.

(You were released but I hesitate to say....innocent.)

In Korea I was labeled a thief of women…Threats and persecution came to me. Men with rifles and bats came at me…the CIA tried to tempt me by sending women agents. Those agents wrote confessions to Father about it later.

(Why would men come after you if the CIA was sending women to tempt you?)

(the) True daughters see that Father cares more for western and oriental women members than them, so they do not like Father. They ask, “How can we call you our father?”

Even as I leave for South America, my children grab me and beg me to stay. I often stop overnight in New York and my children stand by to talk with me, but I cannot even give them ten or twenty minutes.

(Yeah but how much time did you give your lawyers?)

Don’t worry about Nan Sook’s story. I never even spent one hour talking with her. Of course she came to the True Family at 17 and her life has been lonely, miserable and hard. [Note: she was 17 by Korean determination of age; 16 by western] So when she felt a lack of love from True Parents, she developed a bitter feeling. Now the time came that I made the 4.4 Commemoration [this September 8], which means I can embrace my family and enter heaven with them. If I had even spent a few hours with them, this problem would not have occurred.

(Hmmmm. So who's fault is that Father? The members?)

Nan Sook says I cannot be the messiah because I do not love my own family.

(Wrong. She says you cannot be the Messiah because you are an asshole.)

If True Family had stayed in Korea, this wouldn’t have happened. It is partly a result of the culture of extreme privacy and individualism, which is evil.

(I seem to recall that you invested a lot in your own individual privacy. We are still discovering all the secret dirty deals.)

In my life there have been and are many enemies trying to get rid of me. I try to forget and ignore them…If I had to deal with those billions of enemies, it would be endless. All families opposed me. It would take forever.

I had nothing to do with violating law, but I was put in jail.

If Christianity had accepted me at the start, there would have been no divorce.

( Sure Moon. Christianity would change the laws and force your wives to reconcile with you. It's just a huge misunderstanding.)

Why would I need a divorce? I violated no Korean laws, but because women followed me so fervently, their husbands plotted against me. This spread to put me in jail, but I am ashamed of nothing, because I taught those wives to be celibate. Naturally they separated from their husband. The husbands assumed they were in love with me.

(What? You taught these women to be celibate toward their husbands?)

There were many accidents or episodes due to curfew. They would climb over their house walls and our church walls at 4 am, and they would hurt themselves or dogs would bark, and this caused persecution.

(Well according to Chun Hwa Pak, Myung Hee Kim didn't climb over any walls. Her pregnancy probably wasn't an accident either. You got some more explaining to do.)

In those days, women felt as if I were their brother, fiancee, husband and father…They would know where to meet me.

(Huh?!)

Usually it was the males opposing…So persecution started because of women. I was threatened at gun-point, beaten. Because I had to restore women from Satan’s side, women of all ages. I came to restore the women’s side first, so that they would serve as a bridge. So women love Father. This is a worldwide phenomenon.

(Wait.....Pikerun is a worldwide phenomenon?)

As long as there is a feeling of enemy, it is impossible for God to see the ideal. So He teaches, love your enemy…So many enemies passed away and I forget their names. I forget forever, and only love remains.

(Uh huh. You loved your enemies to death.)

If it can be said of anyone, it can be said of me that I live my life for others.

(Well yeah, I suppose you could include the KCIA and the CIA in there.)

The opposition is perishing, one by one. Research shows this. 80 percent of opposers have perished or subsided.

(Oh we hope you aren't talking about your own family members here.)

The True Family is the center. It is the starting and returning point of every kingship.

There are people who are working against my family and me for a selfish purpose, despite the sacrifice of myself and my family for America.

We should challenge those who speak unrighteously against my family…Do not pray that they will perish; rather, have parental hearts. If your son were about to be executed for murder, you would wish there were no such law as the death penalty.

why is there trouble in my family and was there more than one woman involved?

(Oh Yes Moon, you obviously have a lot more on your mind than Nan Sook. Let's hear it all.)

God advocates absolute sex…True Parents only can fix it. The restored Adam came in the place of God, so when True Parents play the role of God practicing absolute sex, think of the cross they need to carry. God has trained them in the spirit of true love. So why was there a divorce? I was trained to control myself even with the most beautiful woman tempting me in bed, even if about to make love, I can turn around and cut it off.

(God advocates absolute sex and you are cutting it off. Which is it Moon?)

Women destroyed Adam’s family, Jesus’ family, and now are trying to destroy my family, the family of the Lord of the Second Advent. What shall I do? It is the course of the cross. True Parents are the only ones in history to make the road carrying the cross of love. Even after 1960, my first wife still loved me. I may have set the world’s record at dealing with attempted seductions.

(Whoa, slow down big boy. Were these attempted seductions providential by any chance?)

Crazy things happened. I had to put four locks on my bedroom door. A woman once tore down the door. A woman came in naked and took my blanket and said, please save me. Then, when I said no, she said, it takes only five minutes; aren’t you a man? I said, I am impotent. She tried to make it work, but I made it not work. This woman was the daughter of a tycoon, very influential. I knew that I would be putting God’s love organ into a trashcan. So I couldn’t do it.

(This appears to be a direct reference to Sammy Pak's Mother. Evidently, God's own love organ not only spent time in the trash can but produced a child there. A child of God. A lot of good it did to barricade yourself in your bedroom Moon.)

I had the responsibility to continue the true love lineage even at the cost of divorce. As with Jacob and like Muslims today, there were different stages of wives. For Jacob to have 12 sons, he had two wives and two concubines. In the restoration history through Jacob’s course, the lineage went through the second wife, the concubine. It is my responsibility to accomplish the true love lineage. This is the course of the love cross, for the sake of women.

(The love cross. It doesn't have the same ring as Golgotha. What comes first the True Love Lineage or the Concubines?)

Women killed Adam and Jesus, and are ready to kill the Lord of the Second Advent. Because of this chaos created by women, my family was destroyed and I married a second time.

(Poor Moon. So misunderstood and so betrayed by so many women. But what the heck does that have to do with Adam and Jesus?)

Korea was divided and the world suffered. Eight years elapsed before I could choose a teenage girl as my wife…The entire spirit world was against me, preventing me from going back the original way. At one point I spent 43 days fighting the entire spirit world. All the creation was against me as well. Finally God approved and the entire spirit world bowed down…Finally the Cain and Abel worlds connected and made the foundation to choose a bride.

(Uhhh.....are you suggesting that the world objected to you choosing a teenager for a bride?)

you may not believe what I’ve said today, but God is using True Parents to create pure love and true families. At Madison Square Garden I blessed Sung Jin Nim’s mother and grandmother.

(That must be some consolation for the suffering they endured. Was there any financial consideration involved?)

Dozens of women offered themselves as candidates to be True Mother. They are still waiting for me to hold their hand or kiss them, but I never will. They know me as cold as a rock or tree stump, a man with no feelings. But if I ask them for their honest answer as to whether I should love them…they cry tears, bow down and say that what I am doing is right, and that is why they like me. There are many like that.

(Yes Moon. They represent your most ardent supporters and probably the most exploited.)

Please remember that there are millions of opponents of the Unification Church…Concerning the secular world, say, “I don’t care!”

(There are even more that don't care about the Unification Church)

I don’t care about the media. So send me to South America with a comfortable heart, by reassuring me that you will be strong to deal with this media…

(Why are you running off to South America? Oh well.....)