#she accused me of doing airbnb because i let my friend pick his stuff up at my place on sunday when i left super early in the morning???

[chiritori]

locked out of my apartment and my landlord says it's not her problem 😐

[purge-that-urge-rhackathon]

oh boy do i ever have tales for you babes jfc my life has been a mess. This is the story of how a booty call from tinder i literally met last night– as he helped me escape my sharehouse- dropped me safe at my airbnb and how my ass is going back home.

so i’m peacing out of australia in two weeks, and just gonna treat the next two weeks like a vacation and have fun and then just treat this like a life lesson. aside from being super homesick since i’ve been here, i literally left in the middle of the night last night from a hellish sharehouse where i’ve paid what amounts to $100 a day (i’m just eating the loss of one week’s rent cuz fuck it i couldn’t stay in that environment).

This angel in disguise i’d been texting with from tinder (but hadn’t met til he came and got me- and our texting has been nonsexual i should mention haha he’s great) picked me and all my belongings up and took me back to the airbnb i’d been staying at as i sobbed in his car i was just so relieved. He let me hug him and thank him and he loaded all my shit into his car while i explained things to him and kind of cried in his car at his kindness and like wow wtf kind of meeting right? He was sweet as fuck, i was only able to get out of there last night because he offered to help me. I could cry again thinking about it i’m so damn relieved. Really that guy is a lifesaver i’m gonna see if he’ll go for drinks with me tomorrow i’m just so grateful he’s the absolute best.

He got me back to my host at airbnb (a wonderful gay lawyer who’s been really like a friend since i first arrived here) and he gave me a big hug and i cried some more and he said on the phone earlier he couldn’t tell if i was crying or laughing cuz i have a natural sort of laugh to my voice, and i was like No dude i was trying not to cry xD He poured a glass of wine as i cried in just sheer relief again and tried to tell him more about what had happened aside from what he already knew, and 3 glasses of wine later i felt way better like jfc it was awful there.

I was only at the flatshare for five days, and it was so shit and not at all as advertised and when i originally gave the guy two week’s notice yesterday he tells me i still have to pay for the whole month’s rent, due on the 1st, so then i tell him i’ll be out by the 30th of august instead of in 2 weeks cuz i ain’t paying for shit when a) i haven’t signed anything b) its super drafty and dirty and in disrepair and he tells me not to use heaters throughout the day or the dryer more than once a week max, and c) he’s letting his friends and shit eat my food and stuff. It’s like fuck fucker i’m overpaying in rent here for this piece of shit and you think i’m gonna pay for time i’m not gonna be there when i haven’t signed shit and you’re a dickhead? WTF no.

He proceeds to:

Harass me all day about how i’m fucking him over (he got 2 week’s rent out of me for 5 days ya’ll; 5 days from the remainder of august which was already paid for by the previous girl who also moved out after a week– so he’s actually ahead of the game here when he’s claiming he’s so fucked yada yada wtf)

He says he’s gonna report me to the site i used to fin his flat (joke’s on him, i’ll be doing the same as all these problems are not advertised at all, and i suspect they’re actually squatting there as there’s no mail and the address doesn’t show up on google. The lawyer also thinks they’re probably squatting.)

He then says i have to pay him for the remaining time of august for those 12 days or be out the next day, and i’m like Dude you have my one week’s bond and the week i paid you for already keep it. That more than covers it. So cue his next freak out.

He accuses me of stealing some $10 hand soap (i’d been gone all day dude, wtf? i’m not a thief just because you’re pissed, and you have my money. what the actual fuck?). I point out that someone drank all my apple juice– and maybe that that someone also stole his handsoap cuz i didn’t touch that shit and why would i even?- and then he proceeds to tell me that it was his friend who drank my stuff- who crashed on the couch that night without telling any of us- but being as the ‘position’ i’d put him in he couldn’t care less about my juice. Ummm okaaaaay but you disrespecting my food and property predates me ‘screwing you over’ dickhead. If anyone is a liar and a thief it’s you.

He then tells me off about not to feed his cat and how it’s not my place whatsoever (i fed his cat one time and told him about it because the cat slept with me all night and wanted his breakfast, and he’d told me then please not to feed it, so i was like Gotcha sorry not a problem! but then he freaks out a second time here as he’s getting more petty about whatever he can. I just apologized again about feeding the cat the one time just not wanting to deal with him. That poor sweet cat from the video ya’ll :/

SO after all this bullshit, two fucking xanax and shaking all day, scared to go home and what might happen if i see him, i decide i’m moving the fuck out that night and not telling him cuz fuck him. He’s got my money, he has a key to my room he never gave me, i don’t feel safe, i am fucking GONE.

Tinder angel (who’s a fireman btw yaaas) picks me and my SHITTON of luggage up and i am just still so shocked by the kindness of strangers like BRO. Super thank, like you were already gonna get in these panties bro you’ve been sweet but now like HOOOO ahahah xD

Really though this place was in super disrepair that one couldn’t see at night (when i originally inspected) and i should have suspected when he told me the girl who was there previously left after a week “for a job in sydney”. Yeah sure, she was probably escaping too.

There was an actual breeze through the cracked windows (as in cracks in the glass) and walls and the 3 inch gap above the door.

when the industrial fan of some kitchen nearby went on, it created an intense breeze through my room due to the suction– only a couple degrees above seeing-your-breath icy at night

It was filthy- which i thought was just because of the weather- tracking in dirt from outside

There were ants in the bathroom, and the bathroom window was cracked and no curtain on the window

I don’t think the tub has ever been scrubbed– i thought someone had just recently dyed their hair but no :X still can’t believe i stayed 5 days there

Cat hair and stains all over the dirty carpet going upstairs

The sweet sweet cat actually has really bad dermatitis and open wounds

Said cat is ALWAYS on the counters when trying to cook, and he tries to get into what you’re doing; he leaves hair with flesh attached to it on the counters and the guy doesn’t remove the cat when you’re trying to cook

No microwave and the dials on the gas oven/stove are nearly falling off. Fire hazard doesn’t even cover it

Cat box is positioned in a place downstairs where, with one of the many cracked-open windows carries the smell of it right up and into my room

The girl in the room next to mine sang and played piano until 11pm at night. Her room also had a 3 inch gap so that sound carried. She didn’t block it up like i did

No lights outside at all so you need a flashlight to see. Not safe

I could hear the construction going on in a carpark across the road starting at 6am

NONE of these issues were addressed, they didn’t lodge my bond with the RTBA which is illegal as fuck so this guy needs to back the fuck off- more cred to thinking they’re squatting. The guy- after all this harrassment and bullshit, texts me this morning to say i could have had the decency to tell him i’d left. Like really? REALLY? After all the shit, like i’d even wanna be anywhere near him? just fucking hell man.

Then i cried to my mom on skype today because i was still so relieved to be somewhere clean and safe and warm with a host who wants me here (like i’d much rather pay to this guy for a little bit more a week than that asshole) and i’m just so DONE. I’m gonna focus these next two weeks on having fun, buying presents for my family, making memories with my cool kiwi friend and my friend from japan, and just overwrite this whole horrible experience.

I guess it’s a learning experience as well. I’ve never inspected a place on my own before and this has taught me a LOT, but like fuck guys. Really just that’s the word that sums it up: FUCK.

Dickhead doesn’t have my last name, no information about me, nothing but my phone number, and if he tries anything else then BRO i won’t hesitate to let the local police know you’ve got illegal substances in your place, don’t register bond, suspected squatting, etc.

Other than this, i still think australia is a lovely place but fuuuuuuck guys fucking hell.

Fic and fic and fic once i’m back in the states yep. I’ve been through the ringer here. Also my ankle is still a little fucked haha ugh. SO yeah guys, that’s whats going on in my neck of the woods. AAARGH. Anywho love all of ya’ll.

[pridge]

The Capital of Cambodia - and the Genocide!!

Right where did I leave off…..am not actually sure as I sit writing this without wifi to check! So this may remain in if I don’t decide to edit it.

Firstly, for my own recollection, I am not sure if I mentioned the very cool cocktail bar I discovered way back in Saigon. Up some dark steps directly opposite my Airbnb, no signs at all. And then just a dark door you basically had to knock to enter. All based on US speakeasy’s in probation. Very cool. Although when I say discovered….that isn’t entirely true. As its on google and tripadvisor! But Columbus discovered America, and a French guy “discovered “ Angor Wat. So I’m claiming this!! There was also a really nice craft beer place just round the corner with a 3rd floor roof bar – so a height I can cope with.

As a segway back to current timeline. I now have rest of trip booked up and mapped out. Am due back in Saigon on Friday 13th, and then start my organised tour up the coast of Vietnam. I have subsequently left Siem Reap and currently in Cambodian capital of Phonm Pen. I had a pretty relaxing time in Siem Reap. Although nothing too exciting to report. Had a few beers and meals with a cool US defence lawyer called Dalin, who was also travelling alone. A lot of politics laden conversations, as a shared interest, as well as reflecting on travelling, culture and life. We had very similar views on the world, as he comes from west coast he is lucky to be in the majority there of being as bemused by Trump as we the rest of us. I also, hopefully, got over the worst of my final MBA module, largely sat in front of/under fans drinking iced coffee in various spots. Got a couple of daytimes set aside here the next couple of days to more or less finish my final assignment. So fingers crossed I have got the hang of this corporate finance stuff now!!

Had a very easy coach journey down to Phonm Pen. Chose to go with the quicker air-conditioned option, rather than mixing with locals and most backpackers on the $4 cheaper option. Despite the hotel pick-up not turning up until after we were due to leave, that seems fine over here, and there was unseasonal rains which appeared to cause chaos on the local roads! Only minor annoyance on the coach was the woman in the seat behind me seemed to not understand the concept of earphones – and had her music playing out of some form of mini-stereo. Luckily I just hid under my sound reducing earphones – but am sure probably annoyed hell out of a lot of rest of passengers.

Having then easily found my hotel in Phonm Pen, and having to turn down dozens of requests for “tuk tuk” from the local drivers – who all seemed totally bemused I’d want to walk 1km or less to my hotel!! Perfectly ok hotel in central area – I think. Right by night market which I may go and explore one evening. Headed out having refreshed myself to Larry’s Bar & Grill. Essentially seems to be an expat establishment, run and owned by Larry. Who was actually sat out front playing chess with a friend whilst I was there it turned out. Tough life!! Anyone who’s read my Facebook will also know that at this point I allowed myself to enter into a conversation with a slightly unhinged Swedish guy. My instincts were saying not to – but also I am aware that I shouldn’t just exist in my own bubble of the world.

As it turns out he was an alcoholic, who recently gave up weed. He was also essentially on a sex tour of asia, which he appears to do on a regular basis. And it turns out he is rather right-wing compared to me. Blames immigrants for his company folding, when in fact he basically admitted that GPS meant his taxi firm folded as competition became too hot. He was then also a BMW car salesman – but lost his job after some form of argument with his boss (who I checked – was not an immigrant). He was predicting the collapse of the Swedish economy due to the number of free-loading foreigners that were breaking their social security system. I know far too little about Sweden to possibly comment on the factual accuracy of this. Anyway, I listened, I felt disgusted at his views. But interesting to hear a different view point. I also had what I think he thought was great live advice from him, where he was telling me about this crazy prostitute he’d seen a few times in Thailand. He’d broken one of his own rules, which essentially is not to spend more than one time with a prostitute. But she then started acting crazy….his words….because she had fallen in love with him….which led to his great advice of essentially “don’t allow yourself to fall in love with a prostitute, especially a Thai one”. This was seen as good advice by him as it meant he could just walk away from this apparently crazy Thai prostitute. Just a different world out there – and one I frankly can’t stand, or understand, and don’t like.

I then had a few cold beers at the extortionate price of £1 a pint vs 70p in Siem Reap, and a bite to eat. And found myself talking to a very nice Australian/New Zealand couple. Both on their last night in Cambodia before heading back to Sydney. We had some long conversations, and we were all equally bemused by the whole “ladies” bars in Phonm Pen, which I’d heard from others about, and there are similar in Saigon I think. Where basically as a western guy you pay slightly more than normal for your beer, but you end up having a number of local girls who work there hanging on your every word. They are not officially prostitutes it seems….but can be….all very confusing and weird. I think I would rather sit on my own with my book than to have women pretend to be interested in me because that’s there job!!

Anyway, enough about prostitutes. As a complete and utter opposite. Visited the S-21 museum and the Killing Fields today. Bit hard to know where to start really. Having visited German concentration camps in Poland, the holocaust museum in Jerusalem and more recently the very hard hitting Vietnam War museum in Saigon, I was wondering how this would impact me. Both were exceptionally well done – and had really great audio tours.

The  S-21 prison, was essentially an old school that was converted into a prison for interrogation. And on this they did not hold back. I’d be doing it something of a disservice if I didn’t at least try and describe it a bit – as best I can. First off, well it is a school. And they converted into into a place of torture and horror.

Actually – step back briefly. So a few bits of context for Cambodia. In a nutshell they suffered due to the Vietnam War and Cold War going on at the time – with essentially first a French and then a US back government – which always ends well. The last of these was put in power in 1970 as the Vietnam war was just going from bad to worse for the USA. At the same time there were the Khmer Rouge building up their power in the mountain and jungle villages, essentially a vaguely communist, but largely nationalist, party. Led by the secretive Pol Pot, it seems very few of his people knew his real intentions. Essentially he wanted to return Cambodia to how it was in the 10th-12th century. And by that I don’t mean being a strong empire again, although he did want that, but he wanted to do that by returning to a rural agrarian society. Essentially he wanted to dismantle the current country and rebuild it in a rose tinted image of its past.

Having come to power in 1975 – with another glorious American airlift to empty their embassy. The Khmer Rouge then proceeded to order the evacuation of all the cities and relocation of people to the countryside. Keeping in mind, for example, that Phonm Pen had approx. 3m people there at the time. Within weeks, the estimated population was 50,000 loyal Khmer Rouge. Alongside this, they decided the only way to achieve Pol Pot’s vision was to eradicate intellectuals, artists, teachers – in fact wearing glasses meant you probably just disappeared.

This eventually led to an estimated 1 in 4 people being killed either directly or indirectly (disease, starvation etc caused by the forced relocations of people to the countryside). Let that sink in. 1 in 4. That was 3m people in 4 years. 3m is a lot – although sadly other genocides have bigger numbers sadly. The figure of 1 in 4. If you still have your parents, and a sibling. That means one of you would have been dead by the end of this. Imagine losing 1 in 4 of all the people you knew, or of your friends. And often not knowing what happened to them, or if you knew they had died, where their bodies were. 25% of one countries whole population – means no-one was unaffected. No-one. It is a deep scar that it is hard to imagine how to ever heal, or even what damage it has done to the collective as well as individual psyche.

S-21. Where people were interrogated under the most terrible torture until they admitted to essentially anything. They were water-boarded (the gentle sound US name), they were locked in tanks full of biting insects, they were beaten bloody, they had fingers and toes cut off. All whilst spending most of their days either locked in unbearably tiny and hot cells, or perhaps worse, in large rooms chained to multiple other prisoners. They were not meant to be killed….as this was just meant to extract confessions. And in the end everyone confessed, which would lead to more arrests and more torture. When I say they confessed, I mean they signed that what they were being accused of was true and to give names of others. People were tortured into saying they were CIA and KGB agents (often at the same time), and often without knowing what the hell the CIA or KGB even were. Several of the blocks had barbed wire put up over the front of the building to stop people making attempts at suicide if they ever managed to get the brief chance to do so. And who could blame them for trying.

There were 12 known survivors of this place. 12, from the 100’s and 1000’s that passed through the doors. They escaped in 1979 when the Vietnamese army invaded Cambodia and overthrew Pol Pot (more on that in a bit).

The whole of S-21 was harrowing. And to see the pictures of the teenagers who basically ran the place – and to wonder how do people end up being able to justify torturing other human beings. And for what end? Did they really believe that they were getting accurate confessions. The whole thing was just a nightmare crazy.

Following that we leapt back on our bus to head to the Killing Fields. Of which there are more than 300 in Cambodia. These were the sites of mass execution that would come on the back of the torture – or just because you were an intellectual or a teacher, or in the wrong place at the wrong time. This particular one outside Phnom Pen had somewhere around 20,000 victims. And in keeping with Pol Pots vision this was not industrial genocide. This was done with crowbars, farm equipment, machetes or anything they had to hand. If Hitler’s holocaust was the disgusting pinnacle of organised industrial genocide, then this was, well I am not sure what it was. I think the only way to sum it up was one particular tree that they have evidence that shows was used to kill babies. And I literally mean by smashing their skulls against it before throwing them in a big pit. Just writing that makes me want to cry.

Once again though so many people say they were just following orders, or were scared for themselves or their own families. And who wouldn’t be under one of the most brutal regimes ever seen. The challenge for me though is how does a society allow itself to get to a stage where it even allows orders like this to become normal. How does it become normal to work as a concentration camp guard, or to work at a Stalinist gulag, or force millions of Armenians to match and starve to death in winter, or enforce the Cultural Revolution in China….and and and. The worst and though is what would any of us do differently in the circumstances. Undoubtedly there were monsters who could barely be classed as human giving the orders, or near the top, and even in the rank and file doing the doing. But that can’t explain the scale of any of this.

Similar to Nazi Germany, the Khmer Rouge deliberately dehumanized those it saw as a threat and wanted killed. For me this dehumanisation is what scares me the most. It is why I abhor racism, sexism, bigots and to a certain extent populism. As soon as you start seeing one human as less a human than you that can be a really slippy slope towards many many worse things. I believe people are fundamentally good – and often it is circumstances or context that leads people to do bad or evil things. But how do societies stop such atrocities and genocides in the future. I just don’t know. Rwanda was so recent. And the UK, USA, Russia, China, Australia and the UN were still recognising the Khmer Rouge as the “rightful government” of Cambodia as recently as 1991. 12 years after they’d actually been deposed by Vietnamese troops – and there is surely no way these atrocities were unknown. So the leaders of the world put politics and the Cold War above their own ethics and morals. And that is also scary. Again though, the context is hard, as I was too young to really remember the Cold War and the impact that had.

Overall, as you can probably tell it was a very moving and thought provoking day. Upsetting is an understatement.

To help process all that had a lovely long walk along the river here. They have a beautiful promenade that stretches quite some way. I waited for it a cool down a bit first, but was nice to stretch my legs for first time in ages. Also, it took me all the way down into what can only be described as a real locals area – but in the sense that there were lots of bars and restaurants in some sort of retail park – by a nightmarket – but all just locals there. Almost as if that is there way to avoid us tourists!

There is still obvious French influence in Phonm Pen – not just the street names, but a lot of the food and restaurants still have a very French flavour to them. So to finish on a more positive note – this place is a buzzing city, and hasn’t allowed itself to forget its past – both good and bad. But has endured and carried on. Maybe that is the essence of the human condition.

Am now just having a quiet beer and considering what to eat. Think I will retreat into a book as well as far too much thinking done today!!