#seungmin royal au

[starlostseungmin]

EMPYREAN PRINCE CASCADES, KSM.

✰ summary: “i am yours even if this is meant to be a loveless marriage between us. no feelings involved, just politics.” — it started with a diplomatic agreement between two kingdoms to stop a war but ended up cascading to a love-driven affinity.

✰ pairing: prince!seungmin x afab!reader (princess)

✰ genre: slow burn, strangers-to-lovers, fixed marriage, mediocre angst, romance.

✰ warnings: profanity, mentions of war, wounds, kissing, not proofread, let me know if i missed something.

✰ word count: 10.2k

✰ playlist — war of hearts (until kingdom come) masterlist collab. ♡

✰ notes: thank you so much @hyunverse for making this collab possible! i enjoyed writing for seungmo’s entry and i hope everyone will love reading each member’s endjng. as much as i want to write this longer than 10k, it is what it is for me tho T-T but i’m really happy that i am part of it! once again, thank you so much. and to the readers, i hope you’ll enjoy the rollercoaster ride! don’t forget to leave feedbacks and reblog! <333

✰ tags: @writerracha @princelingperfect @ggundeuri @orithyia-eriphyle @vumiixlyy @luvrhyune @hopeladybug @misitmoonlight @baldi-2 @baddecisionsworld @thetaytayray @midsoulz @hyunverse @realbangchan @hafsa-hoofsa-heefs @rachabreathing @nixtape-foryou @ameliesaysshoo @jisungsdaydreamer @https-skzology @day6andetcetera @linonyang @hgema @seoli-16 @bokk-minnie @foliea @amagumorii @nhyunn @ravyaryn @ink-spilled-stars @himarose @sherryblossom @shakalakaboomboo @r-arrh @siriusly1 @catwonwoo @suebinn @foxinnie8

Seungmin stood at the altar, hands clasped below his waist as he watched you walk down the aisle. The Empyrean cathedral was packed with the elites and other royals from the neighboring kingdoms to witness the Princess of Noctifer betrothed to the Prince of Empyreanーeven the townsmen. A sigh escaped your lips as your hands tightened their grip on your bouquet. This marriage was too soon and both kingdoms wanted to rush the celebration. And for what? Treaties of peace, stronger alliance, preventing wars, and improving bilateral agreementsーjust for the sake of politics perhaps?

You were sick of it but at the same time, you were left with no choice but to stand for your kingdom’s well-being. And the smiles your parents are drawing on their faces hold the triumph and success while letting their daughter falls into the hands of someone they don’t know. 

The wedding march just comes in and out of your ears. A traditional sound you always hear when you were invited to all the wedding events that happened in the past. They were all arranged marriages, nothing has done it out of love. Royals would say love is an inconvenience to your duties, yours even, but you’ve never been in love. You were just another bookworm who loved to bury their nose between the pages of romance novels hoping for those stories to become your reality. But now that you are stuck with Seungmin for life, your fate started to change the moment you took a step toward the altar. 

You don’t know Seungmin, you don’t know a lot of things about him, you may have heard rumors that he is a snob and doesn’t-give-a-fuck type of prince but he is less or more than that. This marriage was made to strengthen the two kingdoms' alliances and fight together in matters of war. These reasons are not new anymore, they are always the excuse to gather wealth and a repulsive sense of power. But you were too independent to be the wife of someone you barely know. Two months wasn’t enough to get to know each other, but you know Seungmin isn’t as bad as what you heard from baseless rumors yet you could feel how cold he is. 

“It takes time,” They said. “The Prince is kind,” They said. “The Queen wanted him to marry to have grandchildren,” It made no sense at all. 

You don’t hate him, you don’t like him either and nothing is going on even if the priest asked him to kiss the bride. No spark and passion. That kiss you shared on the altar was just for show. A way to fool everyone that you were good and Seungmin felt the same. Nothing. Both of you admit that it was hard to pretend and force yourself to follow the things you were and weren’t supposed to do. He couldn’t even flash a smile or hold your hand unless necessary. It hurts your pride and ego to stand beside him, but who are you to complain? Both of you agreed to do this in the first place anyway. 

The candles burned as the black smoke escalated in the air—quiet. Sounds of crickets from the open garden outside and the wind casually enter your shared bedroom. You sat quietly as Seungmin was reading a letter from the parliament. He should be paying attention to you as a husband and wife, but there he is, covered with focus and thoughts as the words echo inside his head from the paper. It was hard to pretend that you are not hurt when you are not heard. You believed that ignoring each other would be easy in the sense that you’ve got no romantic feelings involved, but the fact that he is supposed to be a loving husband who pays attention to his wife. At least getting to know each other more. 

“It’s already bedtime, Your Highness,” You spoke as Seungmin sighed, rolling the paper. 

“Let’s not do this,” He said, sitting beside you on your shared bed for the first night. “I know you are not comfortable,” He added. 

“It doesn’t matter how I feel,” You said, looking at him but Seungmin couldn’t even spare you a look. “Can you at least lay with me?” You asked. 

“No need,” He sighed. “We’ll get a divorce after 2 years anyway, you won’t have to pretend that you care.” 

“Because we’re in this situation? I’m still your wife, I have the very right to care.” You retorted but your husband just shook his head in response. 

“Good night Y/N,” 

Seungmin left the room leaving you dumbfounded. It was supposed to be your honeymoon right after the wedding celebration. The royal servants have prepared a place of your privacy and expected a night full of passion and love, yet both of you loved to disappoint everyone else and listen to your feelings. But still, you were going to try, for the sake of this agreement. And there he disappeared. He doesn’t care and you just heard the doors of the room shut as his footsteps faded in the hallway. Only a sigh escaped from your lips and took the candlestick from the table, blowing the flame away. 

Being distant from each other cascaded almost every day. You are often found in the library reading books, sometimes in the garden taking strolls with your maids tailing you, and rarely at the study. Seungmin doesn’t pay attention, maybe he trusts you a bit with intelligence and is dependent when it comes to politics. But who cares about politics when your husband wanted a divorce after 2 years? This marriage is also political from whatever angle you may want to look at. 

Many people believe that falling in love in this type of situation is accurate but dealing with this is the opposite of being written in a fairytale. You believe that they only exist in books and are never written in real life. People consider themselves lucky when they get to experience what falling in love feels like in a genuine manner. But risking your freedom for a loveless and political marriage is a whole different story. 

It holds the agreement: “I am yours even if this is meant to be a loveless marriage between us. No feelings involved, just politics.” You admit that it hurts your ego to jump into the well. The possibility of falling in love is crucial in this type of scenario especially when Seungmin doesn’t give a shit and you just try to be what you are supposed to be—the new Princess of the Empyrean kingdom and the wife of the only heir to the throne. But sometimes, you wish it was more than that. 

It was the usual Thursday afternoon where you are sitting on the couch inside the library disregarding the fact that you have to study the negotiations of Seungmin’s kingdom. Reading novels is a force of habit and you are always entertained which is disregarding the fact that you need to study. 

The big windows allowed the afternoon sunlight to touch the marble floor as they reflected on the glass making rainbows and shapes. It was pretty to look at and it added to the mood of your imagination. You know Seungmin loves to read, but his interest in books is highly different from yours, from the genre to the authors and use of vocabulary. He’s a little bit picky about it. But then again, why would you care about the smallest detail about him when you don’t even matter from his perspective? 

Only a sigh escaped your lips as the thought of him crossed your mind. Living inside the Empyrean Chateau—where you decided to stay after the honeymoon—for the last couple of weeks seems heavy and dull. The routine keeps on repeating itself every day and you rarely see Seungmin around. He doesn’t share the same room with you anymore and at the same time, his duty is in the palace of the King and Queen. It’s peaceful, somehow but you would still feel the loneliness inside despite the presence of your maids and the other workers around. You weren’t supposed to think about Seungmin when he’s not around but as a wife, you need to mind your commitment. 

Flipping a page on the book, you heard a knock outside of the library which had caught your attention. It doesn’t happen every day, but then you sensed a familiar presence that envelopes the Chateau.

“Come in!” You said, placing the bookmark in between the pages and standing up to place it back on its respective shelf. 

“Your Highness,” Your maid greeted with a respectful bow. “The Prince has arrived,” 

“He’s home?” You asked. “For what reason?” 

“He wants to see you,” The maid answered. It is probably about business. You thought because that’s the only thing that runs this affinity. 

Dismissing the maid with a polite thank you, you headed outside to meet your husband at the hall. His hair is disheveled from the strong wind, gushing outside but his outfit remains neat. You stood a few meters away from him as his eyes darted on the big portrait of you and him wearing your wedding attires being displayed at the center part of the wall—it would be the first one to see the moment you enter inside the Chateau. He is dashing and debonair, the type of Prince who is pristine and has a good reputation, minus the attitude or maybe that’s how he is treating you differently than anyone else. 

“Your Highness,” You called and executed a bow as Seungmin turned to face you. 

“Y/n,” He said, monotonously. 

“How was your visit to town?” You asked, flashing the most patient smile you have. 

“Good,” He started. “How is everything in the Chateau?” He asked out of nowhere which is not his manner when it comes to you. 

“Good,” You answered vaguely as he gave a nod in response. But to be very honest, Seungmin doesn’t know what else to say. Maybe he decided to come home to inform you about the news he had heard this morning from the court or not. He probably wanted to see you out of nowhere, well, he doesn’t know. 

“Would you spare me a minute? I have something to say,” He said. 

“I am listening, Your Highness,” You said. 

“Stop with the formalities, just call me Seungmin,” He answered as you smiled gently. 

“If that is fine with you?” You asked as he shake his head. 

“I insist,” He answered again. “It will be a little odd for a wife to call their husband so formally. This will stay for quite a while, Y/n,” It was weird.  

“Alright,” You smiled as you go along with it. “What are you going to tell me?” 

“Shall we take a stroll by the garden first?” It was new. 

For the past two weeks of almost ignoring each other, Seungmin’s attitude today seems different. The next thing you knew, you were both walking on the aisle watching the flowers bloom in the middle of summer. Roses are red, the lavender swayed with the air, sunflowers are standing tall and others made it healthy and lively. Seungmin fell silent as his hands were placed behind his back as he walked with you. No words were exchanged as you waited for him to speak up. 

You tried to observe him more as you indulge the silence you’d shared. His side profile is so beautiful, and how much more if you get to see the wholeness of his beautiful face? You don’t want to fall for his physical beauty yet you can’t help but admire him. It is dangerous to fall for looks but you admit you like the fact that he is a bookworm too. And as you had thought a while ago, getting to know Seungmin for the past two months wasn’t enough. 

“There’s chaos happening at the Western border of Empyrean. Terrorists from the Seraphina Empire wanted to cross our borders and raided a part of the town.” He started. “My father wanted me to go with him to settle a negotiation but I think I will be fighting for the war.” 

“Didn’t Noctifer deployed enough soldiers to assist?” You asked. You knew the chaos in the Western border but Seungmin coming with the King to fight for peace is should be not surprising but you felt the opposite. There is a part of you that you don’t want him to leave even if you barely see him around. 

“Your kingdom has deployed enough,” He answered. “But I still need to go. I have to provide aid and temporary homes for the victims. Might as well learn something to expand my knowledge and combatting skills.” He sighs in between. “It’s a hustle,” 

Your eyes didn’t leave his face. The expression he’s been giving is a serious one which made you hooked while listening. 

“When are you leaving?” You asked, studying his features. 

“In four days,” He sighed again. “I need to stay here to think. Will you be alright?” He asked, looking at you. It was your chance to look away and distract yourself from looking at the flowers. Yes, I will be fine, I am used to being alone in this place without your presence and why are you suddenly worried? You didn’t answer for a while, you don’t know what to say. Seungmin, leaving for a war? You don’t know when he will be back. 

“I will,” You smiled. 

“I mean, will you be fine having me around or when I’m gone?” He asked again, halting to look at you. 

“I mean, you don’t even care about me so what’s with the question?” That was rude. It was a straightforward question, but you were just being honest. How on earth would Seungmin ask about it? He never cared in the first place. You could clearly remember what he said the night after your wedding. Getting a divorce in 2 years after everything is just stupid nonsense. But Seungmin stood there in silence. 

“I just wanted to know,” He said after a few seconds. 

“It doesn’t matter Seungmin,” You said as he nodded in agreement. It was awkward for both of you. Getting married without feelings is already hard enough to deal with. The context is empty but with one purpose, politics. “We just have to deal with this and convince everyone we’re in love,” 

“It’s childish,” He smirked. “I’m not one for those,” 

“Me too,” You said. “But there’s nothing wrong with putting in some effort, right?” 

Seungmin looked at you as if you were a mad woman and you met his eyes. True he is not fond of the genre you love but he has a part to play for the sake of this marriage. But your husband shook his head at the statement and gave you a small smile, you didn’t know what for. He understands your point yet he doesn’t want to play pretend to fool everyone in the Kingdom, the fear of commitment is all he could think of. As a Prince, he has other commitments, but to you, it is different, the one that he is unsure of. Pretending to be in love. 

“You’re reading too much of that genre,” He said, shaking his head again. “There will be a gathering at the palace the night before I leave,” He said. “Everyone is expecting you to come,” 

“I will be there when you need me,” You smiled. 

“I guess you will have to deal with me in four days,” He smiled as you gave him a bow. 

“I wouldn’t mind,” You said. “So, what do you want to do?” 

Seungmin stood in front of his desk reading the reports of the chaos happening inside the Western border of the Empyrean kingdom. He remembered that this situation is quite familiar after rebel groups had messed up with the Kingdom’s sovereignty rights. Noctifer, however, has a large military capacity that the Empyrean needs to solidify their protection. Unfortunately, they were not on good terms. The King offered to marry his only son to the princess to make a peace treaty. The Prince thought it was unnecessary to build such a relationship when they only want an ally when war broke out. But it was basic tradition. Noctifer’s Princess needed a groom, as the higher-ups would say. 

It was confusing and hard at the same time. The plan flows for a year after several negotiations and proposals. The two newlyweds were given a couple of months to know each other, but as has been mentioned, it wasn’t enough. You denied it when they said you needed a groom to run Noctifer in the future but the parliament would always make questionable decisions for the sake of power and sovereign rights. It shouldn’t end up this way, but Seungmin agreed with no hesitation even if it was against his will. He didn’t think of any bad things about you. After having to choose Princesses from other Kingdoms to consider as the future queen of Empyrean, none of them tackled his interest. Maybe the thought of ‘need’ have made him impulsive to say ‘yes’ to you. 

Everything was awkward as he remembered your promise of loyalty; “I am yours even if this is meant to be a loveless marriage between us. No feelings involved, just politics.” There it goes again. He was amused at the same time, he doesn’t know you and he was curious as to why would you act as if you care about this marriage during the first night. Seungmin didn’t want to think about it but you keep on messing with his head. He learned that women are a distraction to his duties when he was young, he thought love doesn’t matter when it comes to politics, and he thought this marriage would be a waste of time just to preserve sovereign rights but you made an impact. 

“Your Highness, are you even listening?” Asked Jisung who happened to be inside his office, talking about the casualties that the invaders have made. 

“Pardon me,” He sighed. 

“You seemed distracted today,” Jisung added as Seungmin sat down behind his desk, frustrated about the King’s orders. “Is something wrong?” 

“Nothing,” Seungmin denied. “You are lucky you are not married,” Jisung smirked at the statement and chuckled. 

“Your Highness, if this is about the Princess, you two should talk it through,” He suggested as the Prince looked at him in disappointment. 

“Do you even know what I’m thinking about?” Seungmin said. “My father ordered me to stay here to spend some time with Y/n and asked if I could bring them to the gathering in three days. They also asked me what I wanted to do,” 

“So what did you do?” Jisung asked, intrigued. 

“I didn’t have something in mind yet,” Seungmin sighed. “But at the same time, I want to return the favor for saving my Kingdom’s demise,” 

“Love,” Jisung suggested as Seungmin gave him that look again. 

“Shut up,” Seungmin defended. 

“Oh please, it will eventually come your way,” Jisung smirked. “The Princess is brave enough to settle disagreements by marrying you,” 

“Y/n is your wife,” “You should spend some time with the Princess before you leave,” “Who knows when will the war ends,” It’s like a chore to follow orders, it has always been since the beginning. Maybe he is too distracted with his chores to forget about you, or maybe you were too busy to give him a chance to know you more. You don’t even treat him like a friend, both of you were just committed to doing your chores. “And who knows if you are going to come back alive?” Seungmin doesn’t want that. 

“It feels like I owe Y/n if we put it at that,” Seungmin said vaguely. 

“It’s actually you two owe each other for the sake of diplomacy,” Jisung answered. 

“You sound smart,” Seungmin said rolling his eyes as Jisung scoffed in disagreement. “Anyway, you are dismissed, say my regards to Hyunjin,” 

“Very well your Highness,” Jisung smiled as he stood up from his seat and executed a bow before leaving his office. After a few minutes, you saw Jisung walk past the hallway as you were seeing Seungmin to visit him. You as well received a report about the Noctiferian soldiers who deployed the other day to accommodate the inefficiency of Empyrean defenders. The war between Seraphinian terrorists and the Empyrean Kingdom has extended to the southwest border. Casualties expanded, lives were taken, and the scarcity of basic needsーit was getting worse by every minute. Victims of war have already fled to the South. 

You knocked at his door twice before you could hear a faint voice coming from inside. The door opened gently as you enter with grace. Seungmin seemed frustrated the moment you came in, probably because of the war going on or the thought that Jisung left. 

“Good morning, Your Highness,” You greeted. 

“Good morning, Y/n,” He greeted back. “Now what did I tell you about the formalities?” 

“I apologize,” You giggled. “But I’m here for the report,” 

“Jisung already told me,” Seungmin said. “Have a seat,” 

Nodding at him, you took the seat Jisung used earlier and examined his office as well as his condition. Worry is painted in his eyes and the troubled expression he carries made you wonder. 

“You seemed distressed,” You said as Seungmin ran his fingers through his hair. 

“You can tell?” He smirked. “I’m fine.” 

“Doesn’t seem to me,” You answered. “Are you okay?” 

“Yes,” Seungmin said firmly. 

“Alright,” You smiled. “Anyway, I was about to give you information about the situation at the Southwest border but I think Jisung beat me into it. Do you need some time alone? I happened to drop by quickly because I’m still preparing for the gathering in three days,” You continued as Seungmin looked at you. 

“You can ditch it today, enjoy yourself at least,” Seungmin said which made you tilt your head. 

“For someone who stands firm in his duty is giving me free time?” You smirked. 

“I don’t want to think about that right now,” He said. “Forget about it for a while,” 

“Seungmin, you need some time outside rather than staying in your office ever since yesterday and thinking about the casualties. I know it’s your duty but you’re leaving in three days, so you won’t be able to take a break starting from that,” You said as he sighs. 

“Why do you care so much?” Seungmin asked which made you stop in your tracks. But he does have a point. Why do you care so much to make this marriage valid? 

“I don’t know,” You answered. “Maybe I just care about you? I mean, you’re not home every day. You’re always thinking about business and politics and I feel so lonely in the study. You know why I’m here, I know why we’re doing this but I just can’t help it. You’re my husband, even if this is a loveless marriage, I’m loyal, and I don’t care about the divorce you were talking about the night after our wedding, just let me do my part. You just told me to ditch this topic so why can’t you? Go out with me.” If you ever did have feelings for Seungmin, it would be assumed that you were confessing your love for him. It will be weird and at the same time, you are trying to avoid the fact of falling for him. 

“Do you like me that much?” He asked as you scoffed in response. 

“How dare you say that?” You said rolling your eyes. “I just care okay? Do I need to fall for you just to care?” You defended. But fuck, I already did and I don’t know why or maybe I was just lovesick?

“Whatever Y/n,” He said shaking his head, and grabbed the scattered papers on his desk.  

“Is that a no?” You asked. 

“Yes, and you may leave,” He retorted as he sat on his chair, pretending to read the papers in his hand. 

“Fine,” You sighed in defeat. “But just tell the maids if you want my presence or whatever the fuck you want me,” You added rolling your eyes. 

“Words,” Seungmin warned. 

“Attitude,” You backfired and left his office making Seungmin smile to himself while shaking his head. 

The next day, you found yourself playing the harp in the middle of the hall. Seungmin is still hanging around his office while holding a meeting and you were out of the frame. But if you were being honest, you don’t want to mess up the small gathering even if you wanted to play a very important role in resolving this conflict. You already sent Jisung in to raise your concerns and suggestions, afraid of being disregarded. The parliament doesn’t usually listen but you were thankful that Jisung is always ready to take part in it. 

The sounds of the instrument traveled through the halls of the Chateau but remained inaudible in your husband’s office. But it was faint and gentle. The maids and other workers stopped by to listen. You were bored in this big household anyway and Seungmin doesn’t want to give any of his time to you even if you already said your purpose. Unsure about the conversation you had yesterday, it was true that you were lovesick and he’s leaving in two days. It would make you feel more lonely. You admit you’re not used to his presence for the past two days but it made the Chateau a little bit lively and made your heart pound for a bit. 

A sigh escaped your lips as you stopped playing and headed toward the garden. Seeing the flowers and the fountain in the middle made you feel relaxed other than thinking of your busy husband. You admit you were disappointed that he didn’t go out with you yesterday but you had to understand his situation. Seungmin has a priority and you are just hoping he won’t ruin your night at the gathering tomorrow. 

You sat on the flat surface surrounding the fountain as you indulge in the fresh breeze of the wind, admiring the view of the garden. It was wide enough for your brain to relax but the thought of Seungmin is locked inside. It’s not like he did something to make you fall for him, maybe caring about him too much has carried the feelings. You are not wrong basically or probably it’s because of his looks and how he portrays his expression and attitude to the point that you don’t even understand what you were thinking. 

Seungmin dismissed his company and asked the maids where have you gone. He just missed your musical performance. It was a hectic afternoon anyway and he needed the time to breathe. He had to fix his looks before taking a stroll to the wide garden and looking for you. Seungmin knew he have to be formal with the meeting, a white blazer, white polo inside, black pants, and belt around his waist, his bangs parted, and he looked dashing. But you didn’t see it after he was out looking for you. 

“Why is my wife alone?” You heard his voice. 

“Haha, funny,” You said rolling your eyes and turning around to face him. Dashing as always that it made your jaw drop. You didn’t want to be noticeable but that’s how Seungmin’s visuals affect you, other than his other qualities. He is smart you admit, yet the attitude is kind of snob and cold just like how he had treated you in his office yesterday. 

“What?” He asked, raising a brow. 

“Nothing,” You retorted. “You don’t have to be so formal in this household,” 

“I had a meeting with the parliament, Y/n,” He said as you shrugged your shoulders. 

“Why are you out here?” You asked. 

“To know if you were here, I asked the maids where you’ve been,” He said, taking a few steps and sitting beside you. “You should be inside the meeting instead of Jisung, your ideas would’ve been elaborated properly,” 

“I don’t like those gatherings and I already told Jisung what to do,” You defended. “How did you like them?” You asked, looking at him. Damn it, why is he so overwhelming? 

“Well since it’s about resolving the conflict, you suggested bilateral agreements and military support. I agree with the military support Y/n, but are you sure about the bilateral agreements? These are rebelsー” 

“Seungmin, you can always talk to the Seraphina Empire about that,” You said. “The rebels came from that kingdom and I’m sure they’re playing their part too, but for the sake of peace, you need diplomats to talk to them and make negotiations right?” Seungmin suddenly smiled as you gave him a puzzled look. “What?” 

“I told you, you should have gone inside instead of Jisung. I get your point, I’ll send diplomats tomorrow morning to Seraphina,” 

“You didn’t think of that earlier did you?” You smirked at him as Seungmin laughed. 

“I did. I’m not stupid,” He said. 

“I didn’t say you are,” You retorted. 

“Of course, you didn’t,” He answered. “Do you want to go somewhere? I don’t have schedules for the rest of the day so I thought we could spend some time together?” 

You looked at him once again smiling at the statement, “I thought you will never ask,” 

Seungmin smiled at you in return, “I gave it a thought of what you have said to me yesー” But before he could say something, you pulled right out of the garden and dragged him out of the Chateau. 

“I have something to show you,” You said. “It’s not much but it’s beautiful as if you are inside a book. It’s so calm in there,” Seungmin stayed quiet but he is amused by how adventurous this was even if it was just inside the kingdom. It was a bit far from the town and you, holding his hand felt so special. He admits it was the very first time you agreed on something, the time where he gets to spend with you that it’s not about politics and marriage. It felt easier to breathe this time and maybe all you need is to get close to disregard the tension caused by this arrangement. 

Walking with you away from the crowd and headed towards the hills had him thinking. Seungmin knows every place around the kingdom but never the secluded ones. He may have missed the beauty of what’s beyond the mountains. You stopped walking when you reached the grass field with small purple and yellow flowers growing in wide spaces. Tall trees cascaded to the slope. The view of the mountains is visible from afar and he could identify the north and eastern borders. It was beautiful scenery and the sun setting adds to its beauty. Seungmin was fascinated. 

“How did you find a place like this?” He asked. “I thought you like to stay inside the Chateau,” 

“Just because I don’t go out that much I have a limited knowledge of these kinds of places,” You retorted. “Besides, I found it even before our wedding, I just didn’t get the time to come back,” 

“It’s beautiful,” He smiled. 

“You haven’t been here before?” You asked, looking at him not realizing you were still holding his hand. 

“Maybe I did, I just don’t remember,” He said. “And now that you showed it to me, I guess I have a reason to come back here often,” 

“I’ll take that as a thank you,” You scoffed. “You’re welcome by the way. Do you want to take a walk?” 

“Yes, but please let go of my hand now,” Seungmin smirked as you panicked, quickly shoving his hand back to him and leaving to a blushing mess. 

“I’m sorry!” You said, turning away because of the embarrassment but Seungmin just giggled in return. How on earth did this cold and snob prince become warm? He wasn’t the prince you were talking to about the divorce. Maybe he’s slowly opening up to become friends? He doesn’t have the choice to be mean to you because of this marriage but that doesn’t mean he’s forced when he likes you. And as what has been mentioned, it is easier to breathe now. 

“It’s okay,” He said as he sat down on the grass. “Sit with me Y/n,” 

You took a deep breath before facing him again and smiled, taking the space beside him. It was warm and bright, the fresh breeze of the wind came gushing around as they played with your hair and swayed with the light materials of your clothes. Both of you sat in silence and admire the beauty of nature. Seungmin must’ve fallen into his deep thoughts while you wonder about him. You shouldn’t think about him too much but his presence and connection with you have pushed it in. 

“You’re leaving the day after tomorrow,” You said without looking at him. 

“What, are you going to miss me?” He smirked as you snorted in response. 

“Of course not,” You defended. “Well, maybe? I don’t know,” Seungmin just smiled and didn’t say anything after that. “I don’t want to decide selfishly but yes, I’ll probably miss you. I mean, we don’t see each other that much around the Kingdom because you are always busy, how much more if you are not here,” 

“Are you confessing to me?” Seungmin asked as you smacked his arm lightly. 

“Don’t be ridiculous!” But the prince just laughed as you jolted away, leaving the field. 

“Cute,” He smiled and stayed there for a while thinking about his fate. You took a stroll down, leaving him but the thought of what you just said to him made an impact. It was stupid, no, maybe it was or maybe not, what the actual fuckー. Shaking your head, you just went back to where he was and sat in silence, letting him have his moment. You know Seungmin has already a lot on his plate, you don’t want to mess him up more. 

“I thought you left?” He asked. 

“It was an impulsive reaction,” You answered. “Just don’t mind me here, I know you need some time to breathe,” 

“Thanks,” He smiled. “Thank you for caring,” You didn’t know what to say after that but it made your heart warm. 

The night of the gathering arrived, and only the elites and royals were invited for the send-off. Seungmin was already there, waiting for his wife to arrive. They were enjoying the buffet and champagne, the music was played by an orchestra and the place has an elegant decorations for the occasion. You decided to wear a beige ball puffy gown that shows your bare shoulders, the hems of the silk cloth fall gently on the floor as the person enveloped with it carries grace. It had flowers and spiral patterns designed on it and gems that glow when it captures the light from the chandelier. Everyone was left in awe and mesmerized the moment you arrived at the entrance. 

Seungmin's jaw dropped. 

He never felt this way during the wedding and never appreciated anything from you except that your efforts of marrying him are relevant to the purpose of why. The Queen had to push his son to approach you after being stunned and wasn’t able to function for a minute. You have welcomed with warm greetings as a waiter offered a glass of champagne. 

“Y/n, my dear, good evening!” The Queen greeted you as you bowed at her. 

“Good evening Your Highness,” You smiled and looked at Seungmin who was behind her. 

“Beautiful as always, my Dear,” Seungmin said, taking your hand before kissing it. It was new to both of you, but it was heart-fluttering and painted blush on your cheeks. You wanted to drink every glass of champagne to lower the panic. He’s been giving mixed signals or maybe it is part of the act of pretending to be in love. 

“Dashing as always, Your Highness,” You greeted back. 

“Let me steal your wife for a while, I missed their presence in the palace,” The Queen said hooking her arm around yours as she take you away. Seungmin was hesitating but his mother and you already emerged through the crowd. The King is even busier with his allies at the moment and the Prince is left with no one but Jisung, his assistant who also became your close friend. 

“Stop staring at Y/n, they’re going to melt in no time,” Jisung scoffed as he took a sip of his glass of champagne. 

“I am not staring,” Seungmin defended.

“Liar,” Jisung retorted as Seungmin glared at him. 

“Words,” The Prince said as the latter raised his hands in surrender. But it was a fact, he is indeed staring at you. Any Prince will stare at you at how you showed up this evening. Seungmin already acknowledged your beauty but never paid attention to the details until now. You are beautiful. 

“Attitude,” Jisung said rolling his eyes. 

“What’s with my attitude?” Seungmin scoffed as Jisung sighed in response. 

“An asshole,”

“Get out of my sight, stupid,” Seungmin said as Jisung just shrugged his shoulders. 

“I bet my position that you are falling in love, but if not, you can fire me,” 

“You need to convince me first,” Seungmin deadpanned as Jisung shake his head. 

“Whatever, Your Highness,” This was his cue to leave and Seungmin stood there with a glass of champagne in one hand. 

You were distracted with his mother and didn’t realize how many glasses of that strong drink you had taken. Maybe five or six? You are willing to have another one or more for sure even if you are already starting to get dizzy at the moment. The conversation is all about Seungmin and how she is going to miss him when he leaves tomorrow, not knowing when he will be back. You wanted to say that you would feel the same with his absence but you hesitated. Even learned that he is having a hard time expressing himself so you had to deal with it for a while. Maybe everyone assumed that this is a love-driven affinity but you two are still trying to build something. Maybe friendship first? 

You stood there with the seventh empty glass of champagne and placed it gently on the tray to the waiter who walk passed. “Seungmin is a responsible kid, he is smart, kind, and loving,” “Sometimes you can’t read him and he doesn’t know how to express himself,” “Understand him more,” But you are, he knows that you care and now look at him staring at you from across the hall. His black suit shines with the silver epaulettes adorning his broad shoulders and a white sash that adds to the elegance. He stood tall and firm with that gorgeous face of his. You want to blame the champagne for having weird thoughts and dizziness ーyou shouldn’t have drank too much. 

“I’m going to check on my husband first,” The Queen said excusing herself as you smiled in response. 

The busy crowd of royals and elites was filled with conversation about politics and relationships. Even the occurring war in the South and Western borders of Empyrean. It is quite weird to impose a gathering about sending off when his men are struggling to fight for the kingdom’s sovereignty. But of course, that is none of your business to mess up with this party. This is for a cause anyway. 

You stare at him as you slowly walk in his direction. He couldn’t stop looking at you either and he didn’t know why. Maybe because of how you look or was it the glass of champagne he had or was it Jisung’s words that struck him? He must’ve been drunk, no, he wasn’t, it was just you. You didn’t know what came all over you that you suddenly wrapped your arms around his neck as he pulled you closer by the waist in response as your lips met his. It was impulsive but eventually, he kissed you back. A lot has happened, over two months and the past three days, maybe he will miss you. 

Yes, he will. His lips tasted the same as yours. The champagne took all over your mouths as you deepened the kiss. It doesn’t matter who saw it, you didn’t care but Seungmin suddenly pulled away as he grabbed your hand, took you out from the hall, and headed upstairs to the balcony where no one could see you. He closed the curtains and the door before turning back and kissing you again. It felt so exclusive when everyone knew about the affair. You pulled him closer as he hugged you tightly to kiss you properly. His head is tilted to the side, indulging the gentleness of your soft lips while tasting the lingering flavor of champagne. Seungmin bit your lower lip, slowly sucking it. A soft sound escaped your lips as he smirked in between taking your lips as a whole. Of course, it is different from the kiss you shared at the altar and this is on another level. 

“You had too much champagne, my Love,” Seungmin said, giving you a peck on the lips before pulling away. 

“No,” You smiled sheepishly, feeling the dizziness that causes you to lose balance. “I don’t know but—” You paused, almost fainting in Seungmin’s arms but he was quick to catch you. “I think I’m going to miss you,” The prince smiled, pulling you for a hug and burying his face in the crook of your neck. It’s probably because of the champagne. “Can I sleep with you tonight?” 

“Yes,” He said, looking at you before placing a kiss on your forehead. 

It’s probably because of the champagne… 

“You should be careful with your alcohol intake,” You heard him say as he assisted you on his bed, carrying you in bridal style. 

“For your information, Your Highness, champagne has only 12% alcohol—” 

“How many glasses did you have?” He asked, placing you gently on his bed. 

“I forgot,” You answered, feeling drowsy. “The bubbles had me drunk,” But Seungmin couldn’t stop smiling. “You look so cute, I’m going to miss that pretty face of yours,” He just sat beside you as he continued to listen to your babbling. It was cute, he admits. Your hands cupped his cheeks and smiled cheekily as he felt the redness of his face. “I’m starting to feel sleepy,” 

“You should go to sleep,” Seungmin said. “You have to send me off tomorrow morning,” 

“I don’t want to,” You pouted. 

“You’re drunk, Y/n,” Seungmin insisted as you chuckled in response. “Get some sleep,” 

“Give me a kiss first,” You said. He did not hesitate to lean closer and gave you a long kiss, making you play with his hair, but it didn’t last long. 

“Good night,” He said, pulling away and that’s when you fell asleep. Seungmin stayed awake for a while. The thought of leaving you tomorrow will make him miss you even if your bond only lasted for a few days. It is impulsive, everything happened in a rush, did you happen to fall in love already? Or you were just under the influence of that drink? Seungmin doesn’t know. 

He kissed your forehead for the last time before laying on the other side of the bed, anticipating what will happen tomorrow. 

You woke up with a headache the next morning and were curious as to why you are in an unfamiliar bedroom. Maybe you have been here before but a hangover struck you like lightning. Seungmin is nowhere to be found, he probably just left and flashbacks started to flood from last night the moment you sat up. You forgot the sunlight that peeks through the thin curtains that drape the tall windows to the floor. All you could think about was the thing that happened last night. I shouldn’t have several glasses of champagne, I don’t have a high tolerance, fuck!

“Your Highness?” You heard a maid knock as she enters the room. 

“Good morning?” You greeted. 

“Good morning,” She bowed. “The Prince is expecting you in an hour, we need to get you ready,” Then it suddenly sinks in… Seungmin’s leaving this morning. 

“Fuck,” You murmured. 

“Shall we fix you up?” She asked as you stood up. 

“Do what you must,” You said. 

An hour passed, and you rushed outside the room and headed towards the hall where the gathering was being held last night. Carrying your dress, you saw Seungmin talking with the Queen as the King stood beside him. All eyes turned to you as they heard your footsteps tapping the steps of the stairs and a smile formed on the Prince’s lips. He remembered what happened last night and probably it was nothing to you. But the impact it left made him feel weird. 

“You’re awake,” Seungmin beamed. 

“Am I late?” You asked. 

“I was about to leave,” He said taking a few steps and offering his hand to assist you. 

“Did you sleep together?” The Queen asked. 

“Mother, don’t,” Seungmin defended. 

“Just slept?” The King smirked. “My son doesn’t want to leave without saying goodbye,” 

“Father,” Seungmin called as the King shrugged his shoulders. 

“I must go to the carriage first,” The King said as he excused himself and bowed before exiting the hall, followed by the Queen. 

“Excuse my parents,” Seungmin sighed. “Were you in a rush?” 

“I was afraid you’d leave without seeing me,” You smiled. 

“Was this because of last night?” Seungmin chuckled. 

“What?” 

“Nothing,” He smiled. “Will you be okay?” 

“I guess,” You frowned. “But I will wait for your return,” 

“As you should,” He smiled again and kissed your forehead. “I will be back in no time,” 

The sounds of the horses from the carriage whine at the sight of the King and Queen made Seungmin look outside as you stared at the floor. A sign of hurry and immediate time. The King already settled inside as the Queen talked to him about a few reminders and the royal guards on standby on their horses both front and back of the carriage for security. Meanwhile, Seungmin examined the scenery outside as you took a deep breath before earning his attention again. You shouldn’t be feeling this way. But then again, the scenarios from last night have changed the shared feelings among each other. From loveless to a slow burn. You may have fallen first for your impulsiveness and the lack of thinking about your actions first. And yet Seungmin can’t blame you. Even if this was a loveless marriage, you had to agree about Jisung’s opinions about falling in love in between. Eventually. 

Everyone was waiting for the Prince to hop inside the carriage. He smiled at you and bowed. Neither said a word as he left the hall. You followed him to his vehicle and stood a few meters behind the Queen, unknown of how you should feel on his departure. Seungmin smiled one last time and greeted his mother goodbye but you couldn’t just stand there and watch him leave without giving affection. You ran towards him and gave the most endearing hug, a sign that you would miss his presence around the palace and the Chateau. His promise to come back immediately will remain and you promised to wait for him even if it would take months. The war already reached its worse. Murder and arson, invasion of the town in the West and South, it is dangerous. May God protect your people and the King and most especially the Prince. 

“Don’t miss me too much, Y/n,” Seungmin said. 

“I already do,” You smiled bitterly as he let out a small chuckle. 

“I will write to you, I promise,” He said. “And please handle the parliament for me?” 

You could only give him a nod in response before giving a peck on his lips. This is not about a loveless marriage anymore. It may have changed over a few days and you are willing to help him go through this war and wait for him to come back, no matter how long. 

“Keep safe,” You smiled and that was the last time you saw him before he disappeared from your sight. 

And for the first week, you never heard of him and never stayed in the Chateau often as you used to. You learned to ride a horse during his absence and raise to the field alone, studying more about diplomacy and war. The Queen ruled in her husband’s place and has gotten busier by his efforts. Novels and other fairytales were forgotten in your interest but the thoughts of your husband remained when you arrive home. The emptiness of your place is the same as you walk inside their palace. Distraction never helps, archery doesn’t do either, and studying makes it worse. 

You heard from a messenger that Seungmin is doing well in his duty. His intelligent mind is used efficiently on how to stop this chaos, unarmed or with the presence of weapons. He took your advice diligently and sent diplomats to Seraphina to further discuss the matter. The second week has been the same, no letter arrived that conceived your sadness. You miss him. You think of him. The bond that you created just then is enough to feel this way but you don’t know about Seungmin. Does he ever feel the same? Or has he forgotten everything about you? 

It’s every afternoon you visit the field with your horse to think about him, despite the responsibilities he left to you alongside Jisung. The latter seems to be more annoying than usual. But the comfort of his words that are devoted to the love of His Royal Highness to you gives you hope. You wanted to hear more than an expected letter to arrive. Yet you still miss him, dearly. Especially when he sent some poppies to your Chateau’s garden as a symbol of remembrance and hope. How could you not fall for such a man? His letter arrived three weeks later and it painted a smile on your face. It made you feel alive for once in the past few weeks, and time flies fast ever since he left for war. A month and a week and counting. 

You sat on the flat surface of the fountain in the middle of the garden as you opened the very first letter he sent. Hyunjin arrived just this afternoon, fresh from the five-hour horse ride from the Western border of Empyrean. The man was exhausted as he rested in your chamber and the maids left you alone. Jisung was nowhere to be found since this morning but you are thankful not to listen to his babbling and gossip from town. But it doesn’t matter for now. 

My beloved Princess,

It’s been a while since I left home and I miss you dearly. I think about you every day and never miss taking at least an hour to think about what to write. I apologize for taking my time to compose myself and send you a message of my love. A lot has happened in the borders of war but I guarantee my safe return home. 

How are the poppies that I have sent? I am sure they bloomed beautifully just like you. The garden probably looks more pleasing with you around. And I cannot wait to see them grow and take care of them with you. 

The sunset is lovely today but it will be much better to see it in the field that you showed me the last time and I wish to not worry you as I am doing fine. The Seraphinian rebels have made huge casualties in the Empyrean borders and my men and I are doing our best to protect our home. The war has taken many lives of our people including our man and has abused the sovereignty of our state. It might take a while before I can go home and hug you. I hope you are doing much better than me, my Love and I cannot wait to see you. 

Please wait for me. 

Sincerely yours, Prince Seungmin

Tears left your eyes upon closing the stationary on your hands. The envelope smells like him and it made you miss him even more and how much more on his side when you are the only one he could think of. Your husband made efforts and fought with his men and his father. He thought that you will be furious when you finds out he brought bruises and cuts to his beautiful face as well as the injuries for being brave. But he knows you are proud. And you always are. 

The second letter arrived after almost a month and your hair got longer, got busier and wiser. But the habit of coming to the field every afternoon still remains as well as the war. You worry about Seungmin every day and you wish him to come home. The letters he sent are the only ones who kept your faith stronger than ever. This loveless marriage has already climbed to a love-driven affinity and you wanted to feel more about it once the war is over. Hyunjin has been your messenger and he is always delighted to bring good news that the terrorists from Seraphina are slowly raising the white flag. The Prince might come home soon. 

The third letter came two weeks after the second one. You thought he is finally coming home but an ambush happened when they finally invaded the camping site of the terrorists on the Seraphinian border. It will hold him there for a little while. Jisung must’ve sensed your disappointment that he stopped sending a few reports for you to settle with the parliament for a few days. Instead, you went back to reading the novels of your interest in the library but Seungmin keeps messing with your head. You tossed the book on your desk and went out to the stables to fetch your horse. A little afternoon stroll would help you calm down. 

It has been days since you read the letter that brought your disappointment and you miss your husband dearly. Nothing beats this feeling of worry when he decided to stay back for another while. And to count the time he’s not around, it has already reached months. The full moon has passed, some of the flowers in the garden have wilted, the sunset that you witness in the field has changed, and the skies suddenly turned gloomy than those days that you are with him. The two months of pre-marriage weren’t enough and even the few weeks after that, the few days before he left and the night when you got drunk and kissed him for the sake of your impulsive feelings. 

You sat on the grass as your horse stood a few meters away to feed himself. It made you fall into your deep thoughts and how you miss him so much. The cold breeze of the afternoon had added to the solemn feeling that you felt at the moment. And just like every other afternoon you had spent in the field, Seungmin’s presence never came. You stared at the horizon and admired the mountains as the sun started to set slowly but it is still bright to go back to the Chateau and drown yourself in the study again. Never in a day do you miss him. 

A sigh escaped your lips as you straighten the lower part of your sage green gown on the cool grass to sit properly as your hair swayed with the moderate gushing of wind. The flowers that grew around bowed and some of the petals flew south. It was beautiful that you wish that Seungmin could see this. The view had stopped you from reading between the pages of a thick book that tells a story about a widowed queen who lost her husband in a war. You didn’t want that to happen to you too. The angsty vibe it gave made you sullen and hopeless. You know Seungmin will come home any day now and you hope that the war will end at dawn. Patience and prayers are all you have now. It was his promise. The Queen has been as restless as you but she encourages you to be strong. It happened once before you came to be his son’s wife and she is firm that her husband and the Prince will come home safe and sound. 

You closed the book and placed it gently on the side as your eyes focused on the view again. It didn’t matter how beautiful it was and all you did is lay on the grass in boredom. You looked at the blue sky as the clouds passed by in a rush. It is probably because of the wind. You grew tired of blaming other things for what is happening in everything and wish to the heavens for your husband to come home. Tired of studying, tired of reading, tired of archery and fencing, tired of expecting his presence, tired of showing fake smiles, tired of being alone, one more bit of this will make you go crazy and stuff. 

I will be home soon. 

That’s what he said in the last letter you got from Hyunjin. 

“Fuck, when will the war ends?” You asked the heavens. 

“It just did,” You flinched at the familiar voice coming from behind that made you sit up immediately and look. “Empyrean and Noctifer won the war Sweetheart, I’m home,” 

“Seungmin!” You cried as you stood up and dragged your gown, running towards him. His hair grew longer and his wounds are already healed but it didn’t downgrade his beauty. He was wearing his white satin polo and black pants with his belt that carries his sword. Seungmin is breathtaking as always. Your arms wrapped around his neck as he pulled you by the waist to press on his body. His scent is built with fresh flowers and cinnamon. Tears formed in your eyes as they cascaded to your cheeks, the same with Seungmin who missed you so much. His lips captured yours to show how eager he is to be with you again and he couldn’t wait to spend his days with you. The war finally ended. He’s home now and you are happy. “I was worried that it will take you a while to go home,” You cried, pulling away. 

“I had dealt with Seraphina to execute the terrorists, we took over the ambush and captured themー” But Seungmin didn’t get to finish his sentence when you kissed him again. Your lips molded together as he deepened the kiss, desperate for more until you were out of breath. “Fuck, I missed you so much,” 

“Me too,” You answered in between your sobs. Seungmin’s hands reached your cheeks and wiped your tears away, with his forehead connected with yours. “Don’t leave me again,” 

“No, no, I won’t,” He said, kissing your forehead before holding your hands as he intertwined your fingers together. “I’m here now,” 

“How did you know I was here?” You asked. 

“Jisung told me but I always knew you come here,” He smirked. “You always think of me don’t you?” He asked, fixing your hair. 

“I always do. Every day, every morning until I sleep,” You confessed. “I don’t know, I think I have fallen in love with you, even before the night we kissed, Iー” He didn’t let you finish that now and captured your lips again, desperate, again, after the longingness he felt when he was at war. 

“I love you,” He said in between the kiss. 

“I love you too,” You smiled as he gave you a peck on the lips before pulling away and coming for an embrace, caressing your hair. 

“I can’t wait to spend my time with you, Y/n,” Hugging him felt so comforting as you close your eyes, hugging him tightly not wanting to let him go again. Seungmin felt the same. Maybe it is time to make another start where two people fall in love. The end of the war has sent them to their homes and find comfort. Desperate and excited to spend the rest of their lives together is something to look forward to. The Princess has fallen first, but the Prince has fallen more deeply. 

Seungmin placed a poppy in your hair before giving you another peck on the lips and smiled. “You’re so beautiful,” He said. 

“You’re beautiful too, so breathtaking,” You answered. 

“You’re only mine, right?” Seungmin asked before hugging you again. You wrapped your arms around his neck and smiled. 

“I’m yours,” You said and kissed him again. 

Maybe it was because of a drunken kiss that happened the night before left or the way he loves your attitude toward him. There are a lot of reasons to fall in love. Some may happen impulsively but they take time to form into something serious just like how your situation is with Seungmin. But sometimes there are unknown reasons. Maybe you two belong there. It may be confusing, but one thing’s for sure with Seungmin; the Empyrean prince cascades. 

all rights reserved by starlostseungmin.

[kidrauhlschik]

Let The World Burn. - I.N.

The nation of Rexerum was a country of power, respected and feared by all nations surrounding it.

The golden nation’s shine was dulled by the blood that had been spilled due to the King’s corrupt rule and ambition.

Yang Jeongin was to take the throne in the far future, but after his fathers unexpected passing, the burden of the crown was bestowed upon him a lot sooner than he anticipated.

He finds out the hard way that even a king lacks absolute control. His desires paled in the shadow of the responsibilities of the crown.

The only thing he has the rights to is his own heart.

In this cruel world his fate had been sealed before he was born. What he chooses to do with the power that had been bestowed upon him would determine the fate of the nation.

In the end, he managed to forget that a king is nothing without his queen.

~

Warnings: ANGST, implied smut, war, aggression, anxiety, depression, death, please let me know if i miss anything...

~

Chapters:

The New King and Queen

Cold Hearted

Frustrations

Drunk in Love

....

~

[sparklingchan]

A Duel of Hearts || Kim Seungmin (Stray Kids)

Pairing: Reader(fem.) X Seungmin Word Count: 5k+ Warnings: Suggestive, strong language(ig), mention of suicide (not the main characters). Genre: Royal AU, Friends to Lovers, Dark Academia, Angst mixed with fluff. Description: Caught in a dilemma of affection, Kim Seungmin, a prince, finds himself drawn to you. There was but one obstacle to his pursuit —you've set a single condition for all potential suitors: no royal lineage. A/N: Hello everyone! Here's another installation of the SKZ Royal AU. Idk why but Seungmin has this Dark Academia kind of vibe so I tried to incorporate that here. Hope you guys like it! More to come<3 Do check out the other fics in the skz royal series. (The stories are not interrelated) Here's the link.

You like to believe that your new dorm room is starting to grow on you.

It wasn't anything like your room back in your parents' house of course; but over the past twelve months, you'd renovated your dorm room enough to feel at home.

You'd replaced the light blue curtains with grey ones, swapped the single candle stand with a lantern to help you study better at night, put on a white table cloth and the list goes on.

A knock on your door pulls your attention.

It must be Wendy, you think to yourself, walking toward the door.

Correction: your only friend Wendy.

"Gosh, I really hate this academy, y/n." She walks in complaining, "I cannot believe they gave me a B in geography. I love geography. I cannot believe they'd ruin my overall grade like that."

"What happened?" You ask, closing the door behind her.

"I don't know! I will deal with this later, anyway," she says, fishing out a note from the pocket of her blazer. "I'm here to discuss a more pressing matter."

"What's that?"

"Of course, it's one of your lovers, y/n. I have two more lover letters in my backpack. Do you need them?"

You half chuckle and half sigh, taking the note from her and tearing it into bits.

"Ouch." Wendy says, staring at you, "Tell me y/n, it's been over a year since you joined the academy. All the boys here would die to even see you across the hallway yet you've kept the door to your heart locked. Why?"

"I am not not open to having a relationship. I just dislike how most of these men who pursue me are of royal blood. And if there's anything I despise most is royalty. That letter you gave me right now? It was from the Duke's son. It's his third letter in a row. That boy just doesn't know when to stop." You press your hand to your forehead, stressed.

Wendy nods her head, "Yeah, he is an annoying brat, I'll give you that, but y/n, I really don't understand your dislike towards royalty? Any girl out there would love to be pursued by royal suitors, including myself."

You smile in response, "It's a secret."

As always, Wendy just chuckles and doesn't push you to answer further because really, you don't know what you'll do if you ever have to explain yourself. It's a secret you rarely even discuss with yourself.

"Come on, we'll be late for our afternoon class." You say and��walk towards the door, already tired of the day ahead of you.

*

“But Professor, do you not think that the first king of Taru was a horrible person morally? I mean, he did kill all of his wives when they failed to birth a son.”

If there is anyone in this academy who you think hates you to the core is your History Professor. The amount of times you’d ask him a question and he’d reply very vaguely, never answering to the point was insane. So naturally, you had developed a habit of asking him odd questions just to spite him.

Your Professor looks at you, almost angrily, and answers, “We are no one to judge a historical figure. Miss y/n.”

“But sir, you are portraying him as a role model to the class. Don’t you think that’s wrong? As you said, we are no one to judge him.”

Your professor hisses through gritted teeth and turns towards the board, not bothering to answer you. A subtle smile finds your lips.

“So, class as I was saying. The first King of this country- Taru- built the longest bridge in -”

“Excuse me, sir?” A hand shoots up from among the students followed by a voice, “May I answer Miss y/n’s question please?”

Your professor rubs his temple and sighs, nodding, “Go ahead, Mister Seungmin.”

You turn your head up to look at the owner of the voice, and much to your surprise, it is Kim Seungmin. He’s one of the quieter kids in the class but you’ve worked on a few projects together so you know that there’s more depth to him than just being the quiet kid by the window seat.

“Y/n, I think we could still look up to the King as a leader. Yes, he was ruthless to his wives but we don’t need to look up to him as a husband. He was, on the other hand, a great leader who led his country to become one of the greatest in the world, second to none.”

“Well, does that answer your question?” The professor asks and you nod, bowing towards Seungmin. He bows back.

The professor teaches the class for an hour more, letting you guys dismiss after his daily warning of, “You'll be going to universities next year so do work hard this year,”

You gather all your things and walk out of the class, stomach growling, almost begging you to make your way to the dining area for lunch.

For lunch, the menu rarely changes except on holidays.

And in all honesty, you’re tired of having chicken stew with rice everyday since you stepped foot in this academy, but the other options are extremely limited so you join the line of hungry and tired students, complaining about how difficult this year has been.

Once you have your plate of rice and stew, you seat on one of the empty benches and begin to gobble up the rice like there’s no tomorrow.

“Um, y/n? Mind if I join you?”

“Seungmin?” you ask, almost surprised, “Have a seat, please.”

Seungmin mutters a small ‘thanks’ and claims the seat in front of you, placing his backpack on the sides.

“So what have you been up to?” he asks to break the ice. It seems like you’re more focused on the rice in front of you than him.

“Eating?” you chuckle, “What’s up with you? How’s your preparation for University?”

Seungmin, licks his bottom lip, deep in thought.

How was his preparation for university going, really? He doesn’t know. He doesn’t even remember the last time he opened his books after school.

In fact, lately, his mind has been occupied with something entirely different-you.

You, who acts so indifferent to the rest of the people yet helped Seungmin when he was almost failing a chemistry project evaluation.

You, who says she has no friends yet packs extra food from home for Wendy.

You, who says she is having a hard time adjusting to the academy yet she’s his favorite person here.

How could you not be on his mind?

“Eh, it’s okay. I guess.” Seungmin scratches the back of his head. “How’s yours?”

“Not really well, to be honest . If only that duke’s son would stop sending me those stupid letters, my life would be a lot more peaceful.” you say and it’s true that those letter have been nothing short of a nuisance since you came back from the semester break. You respect his feelings, but you’re not obligated to like him back. Hell, you’ve never even spoken to the man. “He’s so persistent, it scares me, really.”

Seungmin could feel his anger building up. Of course he knows you have quite a few admirers. Even some of his friends are in that crowd. But Seungmin likes to think he always had the upper hand.

Yet he feels annoyed, offended at the thought that someone was pursuing you to the point of fear.

“He might be a duke’s son but he isn’t behaving like one.” Seungmin comments.

“Well, it doesn’t matter. All of these aristocrats and royals believe that the world is at their disposal. They could just command it and everything would go according to them. It’s ridiculous. I’m so glad you’re not from a royal line or else we wouldn’t have been having this conversation.” you say and Seungmin’s world stands still.

You think he’s not from a royal family?

You didn’t know who he really was?

He almost wants to tell you the truth, that he, in fact, is the descendant of the very king you were talking about in History today. But he chooses to remain silent. He’s enjoying your company way too much to ruin it in one day.

“Yeah, thank god for that.” Prince Seungmin replies.

*

The next few days pass by in the blink of an eye and the academic pressure gets worse.

"Wendy, could I borrow your lantern? Mine is broken, I think." You ask Wendy one afternoon.

The sun brightens up the inside of Wendy's room.

"Yeah, sure." She passes you her lantern, "I have a spare one. Going to the library?"

You nod.

There's no better place to study than the library. Especially on such a warm and cozy afternoon when everyone just wants to take a nap.

"I'll see you at dinner then?"

"Sure thing."

You walk the corridors, fiddling with your pockets, making sure you'd taken all your stationary. It would be a hassle to walk back to your room again.

As soon as you enter the library, the sounds of the world as if disappear. Not even the tapping of pens could be heard without focusing hard.

You find a suitable seat for yourself by the window and settle down there.

The library feels colder than your room and you're grateful for it. At least you wouldn't be sleepy now.

"Someone's working hard, I see." A teasing voice whispers from behind, "May I join you?"

Seungmin’s voice, much to your surprise, brings a smile to your face.

"Sure." You say, shy like a kid in kindergarten.

He claims the seat across you, setting his books and stationary on the table.

And for the next three hours, the only sound you hear from his side is that of his breathing. Even and steady.

He's busy reading a book and his eyes are focused on the pages, never once wavering anywhere else.

He's quite sincere, you realize.

The sun sets and the students light up their lanterns and immediately go back to studying. Seungmin glances at you for a second, his lips curving into a soft smile. You smile back, albeit shyly.

Hours pass by and you know it's almost time for dinner because your stomach is growling. Louder than ever.

"Y/n," Seungmin speaks to you, putting his book down, "Want to have some warm Noodles? There's a new stall in town which sells delicious noodles."

You contemplate for a second before agreeing with a smile.

"Noodles sound amazing right now."

The both of you pick up your lanterns and walk out the main gate into the streets of the town.

While the town is busy and bustling with activities during the day, at nightfall the town comes to a standstill. Something you've always liked.

"It's not in the market square, I presume." You say as Seungmin navigates through the lanes of the market.

"No," He replies, "But it is quite near to the market."

After a five minute walk from the market square, you finally see an old bamboo hut in the distance, dim and quiet.

But the moment Seungmin and you are seated on one of the wooden benches, you're as if in a trance. The aroma of herbs and spices and chicken broth is nothing like you'd ever felt before.

"Grandma, we'll have two bowls of noodles with a side of Kimchi, please." Seungmin says.

"Sure thing, son." The woman replies with a twinkle in her eyes.

"You're a regular here. " You say to Seungmin, looking around the interiors of the stall. "It's cozy and the noodles smell amazing already."

"Oh, y/n, wait till you taste them. It'll be like nothing you'd ever had before."

And true to his words, the moment you eat those noodles, flavors burst in your mouth.

It is a perfect blend of sweet and salty, but the black pepper adds the perfect spice to the combination of flavors.

"Seungmin, this is amazing!" You say, taking a second bite. "We have to come back here again!"

He can only chuckle at your reaction. If you'd say the word, he'd bring you to this place everyday. Without fail.

The two of you eat quietly, only sharing a glance of amazement once in a while.

"I'll pay, y/n." Seungmin offers once you guys are done eating, bellies full.

"No! Let me pay." You get up immediately and walk up to the old lady.

Seungmin can only shake his head at you.

"How much will that be, grandma?" You ask, taking out your purse.

"Oh, its on the house today. " the lady says, much to your surprise, "Master Seungmin brought his girlfriend out for a date at our place. I couldn't take money from you today."

Seungmin and you stare at each other, wide eyed and speechless and hearts racing.

"Grandma! She's not my girlfriend! We're classmates." Seungmin says, the tip of his ears bright red.

You nod, shyly, "There's nothing of that sort going on between us!"

Grandma smiles as she pours soup into a bowl, "Well, not yet maybe. I have an eye for things like that, you see."

When you exit the hut, Seungmin remains quite, his lips pursed in a line. It's truly endearing to see him flustered like that.

"Well, that was awkward." You say, trying to lighten up the mood.

Seungmin nods, rubbing the back of his head, "Sorry about that. I don't know why she'd say that."

"No, no, it's okay. She's an adorable woman." You say.

The rest of the walk passes by in silence.

For some reason, you always find yourself in these silent moments with Seungmin. But you like the silence. It's calming, not uncomfortable.

"So, I'll see you tomorrow?" He asks as the two of you reach the entrance of your dorm building.

You nod. You're about to turn around when he pulls you in for a gentle embrace.

Your heart stops. Your breathing stops. The earth stops.

Without even meaning to, you find yourself melting into the embrace.

The next second, Seungmin pulls back and walks towards his dorm, not even saying a word.

And you're standing there, mouth hanging open.

What are these nervous sensations Seungmin is making you feel?

*

"So why were you not at dinner yesterday?" Wendy asks the next morning, an eyebrow raised in suspicion, "Were you with a boy?"

You try to calm the heat spreading to your cheeks, "Kind of. But it wasn't anything like what you think. I swear. We were studying together and then he asked if I wanted to try a new food stall in town. That's all."

And then he hugged you Goodnight. And you haven't been able to forget the way his body felt against yours.

"And who exactly is 'we'?" Wendy asks again, the tone of suspiciousness still present in her words.

"Seungmin and I." You say.

Wendy stares at you, flabbergasted.

Seungmin and you?

You went out on a supposed platonic date with a Prince?

"Y/n, Seungmin is-" Wendy's words are cut off by the ringing of the hourly bell, indicating that your classes are about to begin.

"Wendy, I'll tell you all about it. Promise. See you later." You say and disappear into the crowd of hurrying students but Wendy doesn't move.

Wendy has a different plan in her mind. Something she considers more important than attending boring lectures.

*

"Kim Seungmin, can I see you for a second?" Wendy drags Seungmin by his arm the moment he steps out of his dorm building.

He stares at her, confused.

He didn't have a class yet; he was just stepping out to get some breakfast. Where was she dragging him early in the morning?

"What's wrong?" He asks.

Wendy and him have never even talked with each other before so why this sudden interest?

Wendy stands in front of him, eyes full of doubt. Her hands rest on her hips.

"Are you trying to mess with y/n?" She asks flatly.

Seungmin is taken aback, "What? No! Of course not!"

Why would she even think that? Seungmin almost feels angry.

"Then why are you hanging out with her late at night and why is she oblivious to you being of royal blood?"

Seungmin sighs, "Okay, Wendy, listen. I'm not trying to mess with her or anything. But its true I haven't told her about my family yet. And I will tell her. But I just want her to know me for me. Before she starts to dislike me just because I'm of royal blood. Do you think I'm wrong?"

Wendy thinks for a second before replying, "Well, you don't mean any harm. But...I think you should tell her about yourself. I mean if you're trying to get her to like you back, might as well be honest about your life."

Seungmin’s eyes are wide with shock. How did she even know about Seungmin’s crush on you? Did one of his friends spread the rumor? Did she try to spy on him?

"Hey, don't look so surprised, your majesty." sarcasm drips from her words, "Everyone here knows you like her. We have eyes, you know?"

Seungmin doesn't reply, embarrassed. Of course it is hot gossip when a prince falls in love, isn't it?

People have written sagas and books and poems about it. What is a little academy gossip compared to that?

*

You find out Seungmin hanging out with a female friend the a few days later during lunch, and you try to shake off an uncomfortable feeling.

"Seungmin, could I speak to you for a second?"

The girl looks at you, from head to toe and nods her head. "Hey, she's quite pretty, Seungmin."

Seungmin sighs, "Oh, shut up, Sojong. Don't you have a class?"

His ears are red again, like how they were back at the noodles shop.

"I'm going now anyways. Bye sweethearts!" The girl walks off with a smile, and you're left confused.

"Don't mind her. She's my cousin. An idiot cousin, if I may add."

It feels as if a weight is lifted off of your chest. Your lips automatically curve into a smile.

"I didn't know you had a cousin in the academy."

"Yeah, well. Now you do. So what's going on?" He replies.

"Um.. did Wendy say something to you a few days ago? About you going to the noodles stall with me?"

Seungmin chuckles, "Oh yeah. But it's alright. She's your friend. I get that she's quite protective of you."

You smile, "Thanks for understanding. But , umm...Seungmin, she also might have implied that you kind of want to go out with me."

Seungmin’s soul almost leaves his body. Wendy could not have shut up about it, could she? Now you probably think Seungmin is some kind of creep trying to get into your pants.

"Hey, it's okay. Wendy always exaggerates everything and she wants me to get a boyfriend desperately so I understand if you didn't say anything of that sort to her. She's not very good at conveying messages." You say.

"But I did." Seungmin says, mustering all his courage, "I did say that. To her. And it's totally okay if you don't feel the same way about me. I really do. "

You almost feel like laughing.

You haven't been able to get him out of your mind for the past few days. And he thinks you don't like him?

The both of you had been busy with different classes and tests and projects. The few glances and greetings you shared with him during lunch would become the highlight of your day. And he thinks you wouldn't want to go out with him?

Impossible.

"I do, though. I'm open to the idea of going out with you."

Seungmin was not prepared for that answer. He was sure he'd get rejected, but here you were, looking all shy and sweet while confessing to liking him back?

"Um..so how about tomorrow night? There's a nice restaurant with live music and all. I could book us a table there."

You try to supress the grin that is trying to claw its way onto your face.

"Sounds great. See you then."

"Yeah, see you." He replies, heart hammering hard against his chest.

*

The night finally comes and you find Seungmin standing just outside of your dorm building.

He wears a black long coat and pants, paired with a high collared white shirt and a rose in his hands.

Your legs feel weak the moment your eyes meet. And the gravity of the situation finally dawns on you.

By tonight, Kim Seungmin might become your boyfriend. He's handsome, intelligent and funny, yet he decides to go out on a date with you?

Why? How did the two of you even end up here?

On the other hand, Seungmin feels like he'd been hit by the cupid's arrow. The only thing he can think about as you make your way towards him is how beautiful that long, pink dress looks on you and how he couldn't wait to make you his.

"For the beautiful lady." He says, offering you the red rose.

Shyly, you take the rose.

"Shall we?" He asks, gently taking your hand. Your hand feels warm.

"Yes." You reply, intertwining your fingers with his.

Oh, how beautiful it feels.

To be able to walk hand in hand with the man you admired so much. It feels natural. Like this is how the two of you were always meant to be. Maybe if Wendy had never told you about how Seungmin felt about you, you'd have never made the effort to ask him if he ever saw you in a non-platonic way.

But you're glad everything that happened happened. You're not someone who liked to live with what-ifs.

The restaurant he'd booked just adds to the beauty of this evening. The ambience is nice and a musician plays a beautiful melody on the piano, matching to the aesthetic of the place.

"I had booked a table for two by the name of Kim Seungmin. "

The waiter takes you to your place, a large candle adorning the center of the table.

You take your seats and the waiter takes your order and leaves.

Seungmin gets a hold of your hand again, intertwining your fingers.

"I can't believe we're actually out on a date." He chuckles, tracing his thumb across the back of your palm.

"I can't either. It's surreal." You say, "But I love it. I love being here with you."

Seungmin nods, "I love being anywhere, as long as you're with me."

"Didn't know Kim Seungmin was such a flirt, huh." You laugh, your cheeks heating up.

"Oh, you're in for a long ride, baby girl." He says, pressing his lips softly against your fingers.

Goosebumps.

Indeed, you were in for a long ride.

*

That night, the two of you walk back to the academy campus in silence.

A silence that is so calming and so comforting, it feels almost like a soothing hug from Seungmin.

When you two reach the main entrance of your dorm, Seungmin pulls you in for a hug again.

And just like last time, you melt into his arms.

He smells like smoke and mint and comfort.

"I had a great time, y/n." He whispers, pulling away but keeping your faces close.

He put strands of your hair behind your ears, so soft and tender.

"I did, too." You reply, your hands gently settling on his cheeks.

"Can I kiss you, y/n, please?" Seungmin asks, almost pleads. Like kissing you is what would keep him alive from that day on, like kissing you would fill his lungs with oxygen, like kissing you is the drug that he just cannot quit.

And you can only nod before he crashes his lips onto yours.

And yet again, he's gentle and tender and you sigh into his mouth when he pulls you closer.

He tastes like the tiramisu you had back in the restaurant, sweet and like strawberries.

"I'll see you tomorrow, then." He says when you pull back, breathing heavy. His eyes are shy with a sense of pride in them. He couldn't believe that the girl he'd been crushing on since last year was finally his. He couldn't believe his luck.

And neither could you.

"Yeah, see you!" You say and kiss his lips once again before jogging into the dorm building.

Seungmin goes to sleep that night dreaming of you and wakes up yearning for you in the morning.

And the cycle repeats every day, for the next 2 months.

The two of you had become inseparable, spending every possible moment with each other.

Whenever your schedules would not let you spend a lot of time together, the two of would make sure to have at least one meal together. That single meal would be the highlight of both of your days.

But the final exams loom over you like an ominous grey cloud.

"So, as you already know, our country neighbors multiple other countries, each with their own king and set of rules. I want you all to remember the names of all current kings and all new rules they had added to their country during their tenure. " the history teacher was going on and on, "Remember, you only have a month left for your finals. That final grade would determine the trajectory of your lives. Study well."

And he finishes off with that threat.

You were so busy jotting down notes during the class that you didn't notice Seungmin's absence from the day's class.

You'd been late this morning and didn't have time to even have breakfast before coming to class. Naturally, you'd assumed he'd been in the class.

"I don't see your boyfriend today, y/n." Wendy says after class, as if reading your mind.

"Yeah, I've been wondering the same thing." You say, absently, stuffing your books back in your bag.

Wendy tags along with her other friends for lunch and you excuse yourself, making your way towards Seungmin’s dorm building.

You'd been to his room multiple times now, yet everytime you're surprised by how neat it is. The books are neatly lined up on the shelf, the blankets are folded on the bed and his shoes are neatly stacked by the corner of his cupboard.

"Missed you at class today." You say to Seungmin, whose eyes widen with excitement when he sees you enter the room.

"Yeah, I spent nearly three hours solving a problem last night, I didn't wake up on time." He says, patting the space near him on the bed.

You sit beside him, "Can we study together at night? I need your help."

He agrees immediately, pecking your cheek.

"In fact, we could go to the library right now, what say?" He asks.

"Did you forget, Seungmin? We have a field trip today. In the second half. We're supposed to assemble at the playground after lunch."

Seungmin chuckles, "Yeah. A field trip to the old fort of Taru. Almost forgot about it."

Something he'd been dreading for weeks now.

When it was announced that the final year students would be going on a field trip, he was excited in the beginning.

But when he found out the location of the said trip, he was devastated. The old fort of Taru was his ancestral home. His grandfather and great-grand father and great-great grandfather fought multiple wars and ruled the country from that fort and when they passed away, Seungmin’s father had shifted his family to a new palace just outside the city, deciding to turn the old fort into a museum for tourists.

Seungmin didn't dislike the old fort. In fact, he loved visiting that place . Every year, he'd look forward to visiting the old fort to pay homage to his forefathers during special festivals that only the Royal family celebrated.

Yet, he was dreading today's trip. Because at the entrance of the new museum, stands a tall painting of him and his family, welcoming tourists to their ancestral home.

And if you see the painting, his façade is going to disappear and you'll know his identity and that would be the end of his beautiful daydream.

But when you pull him by his collar and kiss him with so much love, he cannot help but wish for this dream to last forever.

*

When the time finally comes to board the horse carriages that would take the students to the fort, Seungmin starts rethinking every single choice of his till date. He knew he was hurting you, he knew you would be devasted to find out who he really is. But he would die if had to lose you.

And his greatest fears come to life the moment he sets foot out of that damned carriage.

Wendy, with her hand on your shoulder, stands near the fort entrance. You'd reached the fort earlier since the girls were sent off earlier. And Seungmin wishes they hadn't been.

You look confused, sad, eyebrows furrowed in exasperation.

When Wendy sees Seungmin, her eyes widen. "She knows." She mouths at him.

Seungmin swallows the lump in his throat, "Y/n, I swear..I swear I didn't do it to deceive you. I really like you and hell, I even love you. Please. Hear me out."

You don't say a word and stare at him with a piercing gaze.

"Y/n, please. I don't know why you hate Royal families but I promise you, I'm not as bad as you think they are. You know me, y/n. I'm your Seungmin!" He insists, trying to hold your hand.

But you pull away.

"You lied to me. You're no better than them." You say, almost a whisper, "Forget about what happened between us. It's over now."

And with that, the love of Seungmin’s life walks out of his life, leaving him in shambles.

*

You'd not slept properly for a week now and even stopped attending any classes. You had buried yourself in your books, revising every single page of every single book for as many times as you could.

The only time you did step out of your room was during lunch and dinner and even then, you made sure to avoid him at all costs.

It had been dreadful, really. You thought it would be easier for you to move on and forget the past few months if you kept reminding yourself of Seungmin’s lies, but it only made you miss him more.

He lied, yes; but he also made you fall in love with him, which was worse. Falling in love and dreaming of a family with Seungmin was never on your cards, you were sure you'd always marry the person your parents would have chosen for you. But here you were. Heartbroken and infatuated; both by the same person.

And today is no different from other days, or so you thought.

At around half past midnight, you hear a knock on your door. Wendy had gone home for a week and would be back tomorrow, so you are genuinely curious as to who would knock on your door at such an ungodly hour.

When you open the door, you see those eyes again- the black orbs that you'd fallen so deeply for.

"Y/n, do you have a minute? Please?" Seungmin pleads when you freeze at the sight of him.

"No. I'm afraid not." You reply, your heart hammering against your chest. The tightness in your throat does not help.

"Please, y/n. I beg you, please."

Across the hallway, a few girls pop their heads out of their doors, wondering where the male voice is from.

Sensing no other option, you pull Seungmin inside your room reluctantly.

"Fine. Say what you have to and then leave." You mutter.

You're doing everything in your power to avoid any sort of eye contact with him because you know that is what your weakness is.

He sits at the edge of your bed, while you sit in your chair, across the room.

"Y/n, you don't have to take me back. But I want you to know that I never meant to deceive you. It is pure, genuine love that I feel for you. I know you hate me because I'm of royal blood but ignoring that part, you did like me, didn't you? Before you even knew about my family. I'm still that person. I may be a prince but that is not all I am."

Your throat gets tighter and your eyes mist over with tears.

"It doesn't matter. Our relationship started from a lie. And as a matter of fact, I cannot ignore that you're a prince. I had one condition for all suitors and I cannot withdraw it for anyone."

Seungmin swallows, his eyes bloodshot, "Can you at least tell me why you hate Royal blood so much? What did they ever do to you?"

You scoff, "You really wanna know, huh? Does it still matter now? Because I'm never going to get back together with you, Seungmin."

"I want to know."

And so you tell him.

"I hate royals so much because I am one of them. I am a princess. A forgotten one, but the blood of royalty still courses through my veins."

You were a little girl of around four when your now parents had adopted you, more or less. You didn't know who they were or why they were taking you away from your mother and father- the king and queen of Nabha- a country neighboring Taru. You only remember crying till your head hurt. You remember your birth mother crying, standing at the gates of the castle while her emerald crown fell at her feet.

When you turned twelve, your adoptive parents told you the truth of your adoption.

Your adoptive mother worked in the Royal Palace as a governess for royal children while your adoptive father worked as a royal architect. They'd both met in the palace and fell in love, eventually married. You were born to the queen and king a year later. Everything was going well.

But as all stories go, yours had a villain too. Your own birth father- the king. He was the worst kind of person. He was cruel, unjust, abusive and hated you because you were a girl. He had prayed to every God known to mankind for a son, only for him to receive a daughter in return. But he refused to crown you the heir. For the next few years, the king traveled to all neighboring countries , looking for some solution to his problem. And then he found it. An oracle that told him to disown his first born daughter, in order to be blessed with a son.

When the king arranged for your adoption, he didn't even bother consulting his wife. One morning, you were in her arms and the next, you were being taken away to Taru by your adoptive parents.

The Queen killed herself the next morning.

"And that was the day I promised two things to myself: First, I would never set foot back in that country. I made Taru, your country my home. Second, I would never marry a man of royal ancestry. Because I know, no matter what happens, I never want to be associated with royals ever again. Betrayal is all we'll receive at the end under the pretense of a greater good."

Seungmin is speechless at this point. He thought your dislike towards royal lineage was just a matter of preference but now, he understands you. Truly. He understands why you'd take his lies as a sign of betrayal.

"Y/n, I-"

"Save it. You have your answers and I have mine. Leave."

He walks out of the room without a word and the moment you lock the door behind him, he falls on his knees, crying. His heart aches for you. For everything you'd been through and for everything he put you through. He cries for you.

But little does he know, behind the closed door, you're on your knees too, sobbing into your hands. Every single fiber of your being begged you to stop him and you chose to ignore it.

You wonder if you'll ever be able to hate Seungmin like you wish you did.

*

Wendy is lecturing you again this morning, her face tense.

"Y/n, we're leaving this academy forever tomorrow. Can you please give yourself the closure you deserve? Just go and talk to Seungmin. You don't have to hate his guts forever. "

The final exam results are out today, which means that your parents would be coming to pick you up tomorrow evening. You'd be leaving this place and all the bitter-sweet memories associated with it forever. It hurts you a little.

But you had to be strong.

"I've got my closure, Wendy. I promise. Can we talk about something else now?"

Wendy sighs, "Y/n, if this is what you want, then I shall support you. But know that I genuinely will always believe that you and Seungmin were meant to be. Even if you get married and have ten kids with someone else!"

For the first time in months, you allow yourself to laugh at Wendy's stupid statements. She joins in too.

But her words stick with you throughout the day.

That night, after you're done packing most of your stuff, you crash on your bed, a thousand thoughts circling your head.

I genuinely will always believe that you and Seungmin were meant to be. Even if you get married and have kids with someone else!

Even the thought of marrying another man and having his kids nauseated you. Are you really ready to let go of Seungmin, forever?

You had spent a long time trying to forget Prince Kim Seungmin, his voice, his words, his touch, but had you really succeeded?

After today, you might never see him again. Are you ready to live with that regret forever?

The answer to all these questions is no. You are not someone to live wondering the what-ifs.

So you jump out of the bed, lantern in hand and run towards Seungmin’s dorm.

*

"Y/n, did you come here by mistake?" Is his first reaction when he opens his door, hair messy and eyes alert.

You shake your head, "No. I need to talk to you. Can I come in?"

He let's you in.

"So, what's up?" He asks, rubbing the back of his neck. He looks nervous. Like the first time he had taken you out for dinner to grandma's noodle shop.

"I've been thinking. About you and about us. And I.. I'm scared. I will not lie. I do not trust royals, but for some reason, I trust you. I know that there’s a thousand things that could go wrong but I still want to be with you. If you'll have me again"

Seungmin is dumbfounded. Literally. How does one even respond to things like these?

"Seungmin, say something!" You insist.

He forces the words out of his mouth, "I'm g-glad you feel that way."

You scowl, hands on your hips.

"I bare my heart open to you and this is all you have to say? Really? Listen, if you've found someone else in these few weeks then I understand, I really do but please at least-"

He kisses you. He kisses you so beautifully, it pains you to even think that you were willing to give up this. And for what? A horrible father who coincidentally was also of royal blood?

His tongue nudges at your tongue playfully, while his hands are cupping your face, thumbs circling your skin in comfort.

You'd never felt so much peace.

When you pull away, he gently presses his forehead onto yours, "I wouldn't dare find someone else. I assure you, whatever prejudices Nabha had, they do not exist here in Taru. I'm not like your birth father and I will never be. I promise. I will do everything in my power to convince you about it."

And for some reason, as usual, you believe him.

You kiss him again, knowing that if you could go back in time, you would not change a thing. You would let Seungmin easily win the duel of your hearts a thousand times over.

[wnbnny]

the blood crown. (chapter 1.)

pairings: prince!chan x reader, prince!minho x reader, prince!changbin x reader, prince!hyunjin x reader, prince!jisung x reader, prince!felix x reader, prince!seungmin x reader, prince!jeongin x reader

warnings: mentions of blood, death, poison, suggestive jokes but no smut, competition amongst noble families, ot8 are princes

author's note: hellooo:) welcome to my first series on tumblr! i wanted to go with a sort of dark theme for this fic:> please please do leave likes and comments, it truly makes my day!

You grew up in a household made of lies, deceit and poison. 

Born with a silver spoon in your mouth, you were born to an ordinary village girl, and your father, a high-ranking noble. Your mother had been training you since you could barely walk; always smile politely, always walk gracefully, always greet your guests. Each time you would get something wrong, the feared cane would come down upon your hands, enough to hurt but never enough to leave bruises. Your mother had grown up in a poor village, using her charm and wit to seduce your father and charm her way into the ranks of high society. She was ruthless, cunning, and most of all: ambitious. She dreamed of ascending to the very top- the royal family. It was no surprise that when you were at the mere age of ten, your father was pronounced dead on a Thursday afternoon in his quarters, being assassinated by a thief who had supposedly snuck into your house. 

But you knew. 

You knew when the corner of your mother's lips curved up ever so slightly, at the funeral ceremony of your father. Barely there, but it was the smirk of a triumphant winner of the chess game. All your father's assets were transferred to your mother, and she became head of the household- never remarried and never gave birth to any more children. 

Your kingdom was governed by the Bahng's, who had eight sons and a daughter- Christopher, the heir to the throne and the king's sole legitimate child, Minho, the second, born to a concubine in the king's harem, just like the rest. Changbin was the third, along with Hyunjin, then Jisung, Felix, Seungmin, and finally Jeongin. And then there was Princess Areum, the king's beloved daughter and second legitimate child. 

Your mother heard from the gossip circles amongst the ladies at the tea tasting ceremonies she hosted often, that there were talks of Princess Areum being engaged to Duke Choi's son, Yeonjun. The Choi's were a rival family, always competing with your mother for power. 

One day, when you had just crossed the age of eleven a few weeks ago, your mother called you to her study. You sighed, getting up gracefully from where you had been perched on a chair reading, and walked to her study, knocking first, three sharp raps.

"Come in," she called.

And so you put on a demure smile, hands clasped in front of you, never tripping or stumbling on your way. Clothes neatly ironed, not a single hair out of place, the pinnacle of perfection.

"Y/N." her perfectly shaped brows rise, scrutinising you, before smiling softly. Your mother was always strange like that. You knew she loved you, but in wanting what was best for you always pushed too far.

"You know of Princess Areum's engagement." 

You nod, brows furrowed.

"She is not the heir to the throne and poses no danger to us as she is a girl, but her future husband does, unfortunately. The Choi's will surely use their newfound power to gloat over us and trample us underfoot if their son was to be married to the princess. However, we must target the girl this time, it is far too risky to target the boy. Weeds in a garden have to be pruned, ripped out by the roots, to maintain the beauty of the garden. Surely you understand. Tell me the number one rule in chess again." her once soft expression hardens, and she leverages you with a stare, piercing through you.

"Always predict your opponent's next move." you reply, unsure of where this conversation is going. 

"Yes. The Choi family will immediately suspect us if something happens to their precious firstborn, meanwhile the princess will be easy to manipulate and target." your mother sighs, folding her hands neatly on her lap.

"I want you to make friends with Princess Areum, invite her to our house if possible. We'll see from there." 

You nod, hesitant yet confused. What did she mean by target the princess? Was she going to manipulate her to cancel the engagement? 

It turns out, the outcome was far worse.

Princess Areum had become fast friends with you quickly, both sharing common interests. Soon, she began to invite you and your mother to the royal palace, your mother becoming close with the queen too. 

You should've known. 

Years later when you were older, you finally understood what had happened. A tiny bottle of liquid your mother had claimed to be a restoring health tonic, carefully tucked into your mother's sleeve as she made her way to the palace together with you for your weekly afternoon tea sessions with just the four of you.

Princess Areum's rigid body falling to the ground when she took a sip of her afternoon tea, the cries of Queen Bahng echoing out throughout the room as the princess drew her last breath. 

You knew.

The King was heartbroken, his only daughter buried in a grave six feet under the ground. No one even suspected your mother.

One year later, Queen Bahng departed from the realm. The people claimed she died from the heartbreak of losing her only daughter, but only two individuals ever knew the truth. 

Your mother pretended to be inconsolable at the funeral, sobbing as she watched the casket, and you almost wanted to applaud at how convincing her acting was. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw the Crown Prince, Christopher Bahng, standing beside his father who had a tight hand clasped on his shoulder. The prince's eyes were clearly red from having cried the night prior, yet he remained stoic throughout the ceremony. He never let his emotions nor his grief consume him, you supposed it was how you were like with your mother. Never allowed to show your imperfections to the world. Though you wouldn't admit it, deep down you felt sorry for him, a broken child just like you.

The Choi's never rose to power, and your mother's plan worked. 

"You must take what is rightfully yours," she had said on the carriage ride home. "And you must do what it takes."

"But at what cost?" you asked.

"Everything."

-years later-

You stared out the window at the bustling city, feeling extremely uncomfortable in the many layers of silk and fabric you were clad in. 

"Remember," your mother turned around to look at you, her sharp voice cutting through the silence. "Keep your head up and your eyes trained upon the goal. Charm Prince Christopher.”

“Become the next queen."

~part 2 coming soon~

[lettersfromaphrodite]

[20.55]

― pairing : Seungmin x fem! reader ― content warnings : angst, fluff, smut, royals au, Seungmin is a Prince, reader is his most trusted knight, medieval settings, unprotected sex (wrap it up y’all), fantasy au ― word count : 5.480

― notes : this fic looks familiar?it is! I’m reposting ALL my works on this brand new blog and therefore please, bear with me! as always, askbox is always open and feedbacks are always welcome 💌

👑 ROYALS! STRAY KIDS SERIES

Chris // Changbin // Jisung // Hyunjin // Seungmin // Minho // Felix part one | part two // Jeongin

Kim Seungmin, a name you knew far too well.

Kim Seungmin, the soon to be King; but also, Kim Seungmin, your beloved bestfriend.

You and him knew each other since you were little, both your parents deciding that the two of you should grow up together in order to develop a strong bond based on friendship and loyalty which would definitely come in hand as soon as you’d be proclaimed his personal bodyguard- since your family had always served the Royal family like that. Truth to be told, your parents expected to give birth to a boy, but nonetheless, the King decided that even if you were a girl, you would have been trained for the same purpose.

Days turned into years, and the two of you gradually grew up, overcoming together even the most embarrassing stages of your adolescence, and completely becoming inseparable. People at the King’s court did not fail to express their disagreement with the fact that the personal guard of the only heir to the throne was a woman, but anytime it happened, both the King and Seungmin stood up for you.

«She comes from a well-respected family,» the King would answer, «I have good faith in her.»

«You have no idea of what she can do!» Seungmin would answer instead.

Eventually you proved your capabilities and your talent, deciding to spend most of your free time training yourself, and so, in your twenties, you proved yourself enough in battle to being assured both the title of Seungmin’s personal bodyguard, but also the Royal army’s Commander.

The rumours of a woman being not enough qualified for the job disappeared, and people respected you, the only complain being about your too-stoic behaviour.

What they did not know, is that Seungmin was the only one to see both sides of the coin. Seungmin’s behaviour – and therefore yours, immediately changed as soon as you were alone, and you’d spend your time laughing together until your stomachs hurt, sharing blankets, cuddles, and everything a couple of friends that had known each other for their own life would do. When you were alone, you and Seungmin would often lose yourselves in your own little world, where the two of youwere the only inhabitants.

Growing up, however, you could not help but notice that your feelings for Seungmin were slowly changing, constantly transforming until they finally took the shape of a crush, which sadly, quickly developed into love.

Spending your whole day with him didn’t help you suppress your feelings at all, and so you gradually grew attached to Changbin, your attractive and witty second in command, and finding yourself seeking for comfort in his wise words of advice. «You should never, ever, tell him.» Changbin had told you one night, while pouring you a glass of wine while you were discussing important matters in his private chambers; and of course, with “important matters”, you clearly meant “Seungmin”.

«Doll, don’t get me wrong,» Changbin quickly added, dropping any time of formality when the two of you were alone; his brows furrowed as you kept staring at your glass with a dejected expression. «I honestly wish for your love to become true but, we’re soldiers.» Your eyes met his over the table, and you quickly understood what he was about to say. «Unless we suddenly adopt the Vikings mindset – which would be extremely cool by the way, our hands are soaked with blood. Seungmin’s - the King’s or the Queen’s, are not, they’ll never be. At least, not directly.» Changbin’s words did not surprise you, since you have been thinking about the same things for a while, but you had to admit that hearing them out loud from someone which wasn’t the voice of reason in your head, actually hurt.

«We’re like the Sun and the Moon,» you sighed, finally sipping from your cup of wine. «How could I bring together two worlds when they’re so different?»

Changbin’s eyes locked with yours, a drunken smile on his face. «An eclipse.»

«Why are you so unfocused today?» you questioned, as you effortlessly planted both Seungmin’s hands on the floor rather roughly, your body hovering above his.

Training together was a daily habit, over the years you both memorized the other’s technique so that it was actually a challenge to win against each other, but today Seungmin was definitely not himself. He let you disarm him during the first ten minutes, and even let you pin him on the floor without a fight. «What’s wrong?»

Seungmin sighed, the cloud of thoughts that enveloped his mind dissipating at your softer tone. He rolled the two of you around, so that he’d be the one to pin you on the floor. «Battle strategy, I won.»

You narrowed your eyes, «Seungmin,» you warned, and his hand hovered above your cheek, the ghostly touch sending shivers on your skin. Something was definitely wrong; it wasn’t unusual for the two of you to cuddle or hug, but if was definitely unusual for Seungmin to run his fingertips along your cheekbone as if he was almost scared to touch you, as if such a simple act was actually forbidden. Seungmin’s gaze bore into yours with an intensity you’ve never felt, your heart picked up pace as his face imperceptibly drew closer, and you instinctively tensed up.  

«My father wants me to get married, soon.» he mumbled with a strained voice, looking as if he was totally opposed to the idea for a moment.

«Oh.» was all you managed to answer. Seungmin arched his brows, definitely not used to his bestfriend being so quiet about important matters like this, especially regarding him. «What do you think about it?»

Despite the feeling of Seungmin’s body pressed flush against yours, your heart sank in your stomach, and you repeatedly tapped his side as soon as you managed to sneak one of your hands out of his strong hold, «Come on, buddy, training’s over.»

Seungmin’s confused expression only deepened, but he let you move him off you, so that you could stand up and gather your things as quickly as you could; you felt his eyes bore into your shoulders, since he probably was still waiting for an answer.

«You knew that it would have happened, sooner or later.» you answered, more to yourself than to him, hoping not to burst in tears since it would have been rather inconvenient to explain why you were crying.

With quick steps, you walked out of the training room, leaving a confused – and hurt, Seungmin calling for your name.

A month had passed rather quickly, and you hated to admit that Seungmin’s fiancée was unquestionably beautiful, charming and adorable. The worst thing was that you could not bring yourself to hate her, since she had only been kind and respectful to you; even if you didn’t know it, yet, the two of you were more alike than you could originally have thought.

In fact, both you and the Princess would have given anything to be born with a different social status.

«I admire you so much,» she confessed with a tiny voice after she had approached you – standing on the side of the room, during a ball. «You’re a warrior! You must be so strong and elegant, too!» her eyes became as wide as child’s which was talking about her favourite tale. «I’d love to be in your place, even for a day.» you couldn’t help but sigh at her words, as she gently linked her arms with yours.

«Me too, Princess.» you admitted, your eyes scanning the room and immediately glancing at Seungmin, busy laughing with his friends; you and the Princess kept talking for most of the night, and she never failed to notice you and Seungmin stealing glances to each other.

The Princess started scheming an intricate plan that same night, her pretty doe eyes narrowed and a smug smile adorning her lips as she held your still linked arms closer to her frame in the same moment she saw her soon to be husband looking at his personal guard with the same adoration you’d look at your lover.

Contrarily to what you expected, you and the Princess became friends. She was easily entertained, and loved to hear the stories you have experienced on the battlefield; you also became friends with her lady in waiting, following her Princess like a shadow and you had to admit, sometimes you brought yourself to wonder about the bond the two of them shared.

Despite the fact that you were technically befriending your enemy on the unforgiving battlefield of love, you knew that you could never win and so, you gradually started to find happiness in the fact that for the first time in your life, you had a friend that wasn’t a boy.

Seungmin, however, started giving you mixed signals. He was happy that you and the princess got along, but he also felt extremely dejected; the realization that he’d have to get married, made him realize that the only woman he wanted to give his heart to, the only woman he wanted to be faithful to, was you.

There were days where Seungmin would run away from his meetings in order to spend time with you next to the river, pretend to be a fortune teller and reading your hand.

«A majestic Prince will swipe you off from your feet, one day.» he’d say, refraining from the instinct of intertwining his fingertips with yours and never let go.

«Seungmin,» you laughed, «I’m not qualified enough.» you mocked the words you’ve been hearing for years but this time, they held every bit of truth. As you were about to retreat your hand from Seungmin’s, he tightened his hold, falling silent as he silently held your hand and wordlessly stared into the water, his jaw clenched and looking somehow as if your words managed to hurt him.

Other times, Seungmin would treat you as your relationship was strictly business related; talking to you only when it was strictly needed or coldly dismissing you as soon as the both of you reached his personal’s chambers room. You silently went along with him, loving and cherishing every moment of kindness he showed you, but also hoping for your feelings to definitely dissipate into thin air before the engagement was officially announced.

Another month had passed, and for your Kingdom, things dramatically changed; the King sadly announced you that you would lead the army in order to suppress a riot, which had quickly turned into a guerrilla, and consequently, couldn’t be solved peacefully anymore. The nearest Kingdom was attacking; declaring war to yours and taking advantage of these riots to furtherly increase the number of their soldiers.

«No.» Seungmin interrupted you; as you were about agree on the mission. Both yours and Changbin’s head turned to him at the speed of light, and your gaze locked with Seungmin’s intense one. «It’s too dangerous for her.» he spoke, his eyes never faltering from yours with such a desperation that almost made it difficult for you to breathe.

With a hammering heart, you furrowed your brows, confused by Seungmin’s strange attitude; you knew the possibilities to come back alive were almost inexistent but they have always been, and still, Seungmin never objected, not once. At least, not during an official meeting.

Changbin’s knee softly bumped against yours under the table, and you snapped out of your thoughts, noticing how everyone was staring at you.

«It’s my job, your Majesty.» you tried to keep a composed voice despite the whirlwind of emotions running into your soul, referring to Seungmin by using  his title, like every other time you were in public. Seungmin’s eyes widened in surprise and his brows furrowed; he wanted so desperately to convince you not to go, but the words died in his throat.

«The meeting is dismissed.» the King nodded at you and Changbin, «You’ll leave tomorrow in the morning.» he dismissed the both of you, but asked Seungmin to remain.

«The hell was that?» Changbin whispered at you, tightly gripping your elbow as soon as you were outside the council room.

«No idea.» you mumbled back, watching Changbin sneakily placing his ear against the heavy wooden door in order to hear what they were saying.

«They’re yelling!» he mouthed, aggressively pointing towards the door. The guards standing at the sides curiously glanced at him, but then decided to remain silent, knowing better not to get on Changbin’s bad side. «I can’t understand anything, for fuck’s sake.» he furrowed his brows, bending his knees as to try a better angle.

«Maybe near the keyhole…» he whispered, and you shook your head before grabbing his ear and starting to walk away, ignoring his pained whines.

Seungmin asked to meet you in his private chambers few hours later, and you gladly accepted, always preferring to stay away from the busy preparations of war; Changbin would have done everything superbly anyways. Seungmin didn’t tell you what he and his father talked about, and you did not ask, knowing that he would have eventually told you as soon as he was ready.

The two of you laid together on his big mattress as you did every time you’d be about to leave, Seungmin holding you impossibly close to his strong chest at the point where your breathing synchronized, and probably did your hearts, too.

«Promise you’ll come back,» Seungmin’s quiet mumble broke the peaceful silence of the room.

«I always do.» you mumbled back immediately, unaware that you’d cut Seungmin’s sentence halfway.

«To me. Come back to me, please.» Seungmin’s arms tightened around you, and you widened your eyes, confused; your heart picked up pace, and you shuffled, removing from his tight hold in order to sit on the bed and face him instead.

«Seungmin,» your heart was hammering in your chest at the point you felt it was getting hard to breathe, but you proceeded; you knew better than anyone that, despite your promises, your return was never granted, and with an imminent war coming up, you would rather face the enemy with a furious broken heart instead of a heavy heart full of unconfessed feelings. «I… Love you.» you mumbled, suddenly unable to look at him in the eyes.

«I love you, too.» you felt the bed shuffle, and Seungmin sat in front of you, mirroring your pose and reaching out to hold one of your hands; with a breathless chuckle, you shook your head, a lump forming in your throat.

«Not like that, Minnie.» you tenderly looked at him, calling him by the nickname you used when you were still kids. «I love you in the way I’m not supposed to, like a woman loves a man.» you finally managed to lock your gaze with Seungmin, which was looking at you like he had seen a ghost; his eyes were wide and his lips were slightly parted. Seungmin remained silent, and your heart sank deeper by each passing seconds, until you closed your eyes, sighing loudly.

«It’s okay, your Majesty.» you politely smiled at him, your walls building up by themselves, «I knew that, already.» you reached out to affectionately ruffle his hair, before climbing down the bed and taking your leave.

That night, Seungmin’s and the Princess’ engagement was publically confirmed.

Needless to say, being his bodyguard, you had to be there too, a fake smile plastered on your face as you congratulated them, Seungmin’s eyes looking anywhere but you.

That night, you broke down crying in Changbin’s arms, which remained silent, patiently caressing your hair and wiping your wet cheeks as you cried yourself to sleep.

The following morning, you and Changbin sat on your horses, leading the army as the Royal Family and the villagers were ready to wish you good luck, accompanying you all the way through the city’s gates.

No matter how many times Seungmin tried to make eye contact with you; you kept your gaze strictly in front of yourself, your eyes swollen and your heart heavy.

«That was hot.» Changbin told you once you were far enough from the Capital. «Cool, but also hot.» you scoffed, sad smile on your face.

«It wasn’t. I’ve been an idiot.» you sighed, shaking your head at the thought of what happened the day before.

«I don’t think so,» he shrugged. «You didn’t look at him, but I did. And let me say that-»

«Changbin,» you turned towards him, and he immediately shut up at the sight of your teary eyes, mimicking to close his mouth with a lock and throwing away the key. «I’d rather talk about our upcoming duties.»

For the following three weeks and two days, Seungmin did not show up in your thoughts, not even once; the situation on the battlefield was alarming, and to say that the problem had been underestimated was a euphemism.

The enemy’s soldiers outnumbered yours, and you had spent your days restlessly fighting and protecting the small watch out defensive forts you managed to occupy. Both you and Changbin had been changing up strategies day by day, and the both of you grew stressed easily, also noticing that the soldier’s morale definitely weakened due to the unbalanced situation.

«If we get back alive, I’ll start a riot myself.» Changbin said, putting all his effort into keeping a calm surface when he probably wanted to set fire to the whole Castle out of spite. «That bastard of a King sent us out here on our funeral.» he spoke, his hands balled in fists and his knuckles almost white; you chuckled, humourlessly, agreeing with him.

It was indeed a suicide mission, and you allowed yourself thinking about Seungmin’s strong arms holding you close, one last time, before gathering your things and getting ready to join your soldiers on the battlefield. You were glad you and Changbin were on the same page: today’s battle would have been decisive for the decision regarding your retreat.

Swinging your sword, you managed to neutralize yet another one of your opponents, helping one of the soldiers that had been surrounded by enemies. Deep in your heart, you knew you would never win today’s battle; the soldiers were too tired, and the enemy clearly outnumbered you. As much as you hated declaring loss, the options were simple: retreat and have a small chance to get back home, or die on the battlefield. Your sword effortlessly sank in the stomach on another man, and you kicked him to the floor with a strained groan.

«Fall back!» you shouted at the top of your lungs, glad that the soldiers near you immediately repeated your command, and so you all quickly retreated. Hastily, you glanced around one last time, and Changbin appeared next to you with a worried shout, which did not reach your ears, as it should have.

Everything started to get blurry, and you gradually got dizzy; your grip around the sword’s handle loosened, and you glanced down to see a short blade perfectly lodged into your abdomen. Pain and darkness surrounded your senses and you collapsed, aware that Changbin was ready to catch you once again.

Seungmin essentially spent the majority of his days staring outside of the window, waiting to see you coming back with a triumphant smile on your face as you leaded the army back home, as you always did every time. Once again, he shifted his position on his chair, before he heard one of the guards outside his door announcing that his fiancée was about to enter the room.

«Seungmin, we have to talk.» she told him, an unusual distressed tone in her voice, and he shifted his gaze on her. «I know you don’t have feelings for me.» she reached out, placing her hand above his on the chair’s handles.

Seungmin scoffed, an exasperated sigh leaving his lips as he threw his head back on the chair. «And?»

«And I don’t love you, either.» she finished with a polite smile as his head shot back and their gaze locked. «I’m in a relationship with my lady in waiting.» she carefully whispered her confession. «I’ve been cheating on you even before meeting you!» she smiled widely, and he faintly returned her smile. «I came here to tell you I want to help you, as soon as she comes back. We don’t love each other, but we’re still friends.»

«Thank you.» Seungmin said, placing his hand on top of hers, gratitude evident in his eyes. Seungmin couldn’t wait for you to come back home to confess his love for you, and so, he and his fiancée spent the entire morning creating a plan that could allow their Kingdoms to maintain the newfound peace, but also allow them to realize their love without suffering any further. She was about to answer, when a guard entered the room, informing you that the army was now crossing the castle gates, and Seungmin ran.

Seungmin rushed through the castle’s corridors like a mad man, and as soon as he was almost at the Castle’s gates, he was met with Changbin, riding on top of his horse and staring ahead with a dark look on his face. Seungmin’s eyes shifted on your white horse, pain squeezing his heart in a tight grip, as he did not catch any sight of you. You were not riding your horse, you were not walking among the few remaining soldier, and you were nowhere to be seen.

Suddenly, a small, wooden carriage that both yours and Changbin’s horse were pulling along caught his attention; an arm was dangling from the wooden surface, and Seungmin petrified.

Even if that person’s identity was hidden thanks to a blanket placed over their shape, Seungmin would recognize that armour anywhere, since he gave it to you as a present.

«Move.» Changbin’s tone was rough. It did not show empathy, nor respect. Seungmin could feel the pent up rage that was boiling in the boy’s blood.

«Is she-»

«I said move,» Changbin repeated, as if he was talking to a captured enemy soldier and not to the future King, the dark circles under his eyes now more evident as he finally returned Seungmin’s gaze. «Or she might as well be dead.»

You woke up feeling as if a whole army had been using your body as a carpet to walk on; you couldn’t entirely remember what happened on the battlefield, but there was a white bandage covering up you abdomen, and the pain you were feeling was almost unbearable.

«You’re lucky you’re alive.» Changbin said as soon as he heard the news that you woke up. «That blade was poisoned.» he said, squeezing your hand as he sat on the small, wooden chair next to the bed.

«Well, that was an adventure.» you muttered, still feeling weak and already hating the feeling of the bandage around your abdomen.

«Adventure? I was so worried for you, I almost got fired!» Changbin whined, and you giggled.

«I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to almost die.» you sighed, and your friend simply leaned in to quickly kiss your forehead.

The second visit you received was Seungmin’s. Cowardly, you pretended to be asleep for half of the time he had been there, until he sighed, and hesitantly reached out to hold your hand.

«I can’t wait for you to wake up,» his voice gently said, as his thumb caressed your knuckles. Even if your first instinct was to intertwine your fingers with his as you always did, you prevented yourself from doing so, settling for enjoying the feeling of Seungmin’s warm hands holding yours. «So that I can confess to you properly, hoping to be still on time for you to say yes.» your heart picked up pace at his words, but you still kept your eyes closed.

«Truth was, you caught me completely off guard that time, and I had been talking with my father about annulling the engagement, because I love you. The marriage… It won’t be cancelled, but me and the Princess found a way to make everyone happy, guess how?» he chuckled, «The Princess has-no, I want to see your expression as I tell you but, long story short, we both love someone else.» you had to bite the inside of your cheeks not to smile. «And now, you can’t stop pretending to be asleep.»

Your eyes shot open with a groan, «I was good at acting!»

«You’ve always been terrible at it.» Seungmin smiled at you, tightening his hold around your hand.

«Tell me about the Princess.» you eyed him curiously, as your fingers finally interlocked together.

«Oh! She has a girlfriend.» he said, smiling at your eyes widening while an incredulous smile spread on your face. «Her lady in waiting.»

«No way!» you exclaimed, excited and happy with the news. «Now help me up, and tell me everything.» With gentle hands, Seungmin helped you in a sitting position, and told you that he and the Princess both decided to get married, but live their own sentimental life behind closed doors.

«I guess me and her maid will sink our sorrows in the wine that will be served at the wedding, then.» you sighed, and Seungmin held your hand a little bit tighter.

«Is that a yes?» he asked, hopeful eyes searching for yours.

«Yes, Seungmin.» you smiled, with a nod. «A thousand times yes.» Seungmin leaned in, kissing your lips with a soft peck, before smiling widely and mumbling a sweet «I love you.»

One long year passed since that day; your wound totally recovered, and in exchange, you got yet another scar adorning your body. Seungmin saw you naked a countless times by now, and yet, he’d still take his time to kiss every scar on your skin, his gentle and soft lip making you shiver in reflex.

The guerrilla had been won thanks to the Princess’ Reign landing you their military forces, and you and Changbin came back from the battlefield with wide smile on your faces. Needless to say, as soon as you told Changbin about Seungmin’s plan, he couldn’t stop talking about it.

«What did I tell you back then?» Changbin smiled, hugging you close and spinning you around few times. «You needed an Eclipse!»

«Changbin!» you laughed, «It makes no sense, and you were drunk back then!»

«Tipsy. And still a genius.» you were glad to have Changbin as your friend, since sometimes you felt like he was happier than you were about it. Truth was, deep inside you knew that you risked your life on a daily basis, and the thought of not coming back to Seungmin made your heart sink in your stomach.

Seungmin and the Princess got married approximatively seven month after you came back injured, and you couldn’t help but giggle as the Princess’ lady in waiting gently elbowed you as they swore each other fidelity. Seungmin managed to glance at you as he spoke his vows, and you rolled your eyes at him, tilting your head and hiding a smile from unwanted eyes.

Seungmin and the Princess both insisted to re-arrange the dispositions of the rooms, so that yours and her lady in waiting’s would be at each side of their shared chambers; meaning that they both could sneak out to meet their lover without anybody knowing. Therefore, that’s how you spent your time. During the day, you would be occupying your position as Seungmin’s personal bodyguard, ignoring Changbin’s knowing gazes as you were trying to maintain a stoic posture, while at night, you were Seungmin’s lover.

Seungmin was both a gentle, passionate Prince as much as he was a gentle and passionate lover; whatever he did, he always made sure not to hurt you, and he always put your pleasure before his. At first, his hand would be draped over your mouth to muffle your too loud moans, but eventually, the King found out about your secret relationship as one day, a loud cough interrupted your make out session behind one of the Castle’s columns in the hallways. Seungmin had you pinned against the wall, one legs between yours, and you couldn’t be more embarrassed about it. Of course, the Princess had been called up immediately, and they both decided to confess.

The King’s face paled for a minute, before dismissing you all with a wave of his hand. «I want an heir. I don’t care how, but at least make me become a grandfather before you make me die of heart attack.» since then, he never said anything else about the situation, but indeed, he had been paying a little more attention to the four of you, finding a new source of entertainment among the court.

Your nightgown danced around your legs as you walked over to Seungmin’s desk chair, his eyes travelling on your body since the nightgown’s fabric did not hide almost anything. With attentive hands, you grabbed Seungmin’s crown, admiring the precious stones adorning it, before placing it on top of your head and turning around to meet Seungmin’s gaze, still looking at you while leaning against the doorframe which connected your rooms.

«Does it suit me?» you asked, smiling at how Seungmin was looking at you. Seungmin was indeed taken aback, utterly dumb at the sight – at the sheer insolence of it, at the impossible beauty. His crown suited you perfectly, he thought. With slow steps, Seungmin moved closer to you, and you furrowed your eyebrows at his lack of answer. Seungmin’s careful fingers adjusted the crown on top of your head, and as you met your gaze, you felt almost devoured by the sheer lust and love you saw in them.

«Don’t ever let anyone but me see you like this.» Seungmin mumbled, as he admired once again the girl he has loved for his whole life wearing his crown and looking definitely too insolent, too beautiful – and entirely his.

Standing on your tiptoes, your hands sneaked around Seungmin’s neck as you hastily captured his lips in a passionate kiss, and he quickly held your waist, turning you around so that you would partially sit on his desk. Seungmin’s hands travelled along your legs, lifting your nightgown as they reached higher, and quickly scooped you up in his arms, causing you to squeal in surprise against his collarbone, which you were busy marking up. Seungmin effortlessly walked to your room with you in his arms, blindly closing the door behind the two of you. 

Seungmin laid you on the bed as your open-mouthed kisses set the pace for the rhythm of taking off each other closes, and that night, Seungmin let you ride him while wearing his crown on top of your head. Seungmin was sitting on the bed, balancing his weight with his left hand stretched out behind him, as his right one occasionally gripped your thigh, strained moans accompanied by nails sinking into your skin, or either to cup your jaw to connect your lips as the feeling of you moving so perfectly on top of him and leaving scratches along his back and his chest made him feel on cloud nine.

Needless to say, you felt the same; Seungmin’s hooded eyes would follow every move, looking at you like you were some sort of goddess, while his hands caressed your body, fondling your breasts or gripping your hair just to roughly connect your lips. Seungmin’s gaze went downwards, and you followed it; your wetness was spreading all over Seungmin’s hipbones, and you could not help but let out a moan at the sight of his length continuously disappearing inside of you at the pace you set.  

«So perfect,» Seungmin mumbled against your neck, voicing a strained moan as your orgasm unexpectedly washed over you as now both his hands were playing with your breasts. You sank down on his length, your head falling in the crook of his neck as you hugged him tightly, his crown falling on the mattress. The continuous feeling of you clenching around Seungmin triggered his orgasm as well, and he came with a low moan.

«Let’s use your crown every night from now on.» you panted, reaching out to toy with the jewel as both of you were still recovering from your post orgasm state. Seungmin chuckled over the sweaty skin of your neck, and you shivered.

«Give me ten minutes,» he mumbled, lifting his head to bite your earlobe. «And we can use it again.» your answer came under the form of a breathy, needy whine, as his hands roughly pulled your body against his.

all works © lettersfromaphrodite

Do not modify, repost, translate or plagiarize my stories. I only publish my works on tumblr & AO3.

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[inncubus-honey]

tell me what's underneath

a/n: this is along the same lines as his section the treating wounds fix I did for him. but yk, he's the royal and the reader is the protector. but also it will take place after the attack. also imagine him in the outfit that he wore on the masked singer recently

Word Count: 1.8k

royal!seungmin x knight!gn!reader

royal roundabouts masterlist

smoke and heat surrounded them on all sides of the meadow opening. the knight dragged their prince by his hand into the forest to which they exited; both covering their mouths with cloth from the knights shirt to keep smoke from getting in. yells and clashing of metal were heard behind the prince as you dragged him further into the thick of the forest.

one moment he is on his way to a neighboring kingdom to talk politics, the next flaming arrows and people charging from the trees, swords drawn with people screaming with pains and war cries. the carriage tripped over as horses traveled past it, their riders rocking it back and forth.

once it wa tipped onto its side, they ran to fight the other knights who saw them rock it. you and seungmin carefully got of the carriage and you took him towards the woods to escape the attackers eyes.

“my liege, we must move further into the forest so we can lose them!” your words rang in his ears as he went further into the woods by you.

his head pounded against the thudding of horse hooves racing towards one another. cries of knights as they were swept off their horse only to be backstabbed by the enemy who caused it. he looked back and forth from you back towards the violence behind him.

the only thing keeping seungmin tethered to his head in the moment was your hand in his. the calluses of your hand against his softer ones; puppy eyes staring at your side profile and taking in every inch of it. with you as his protector, seungmin would follow you to the ends of the earth.

you handed a tin cup to seungmin who sat on an infirmary bed. the doctor finished checking him out and left y'all for a quiet moment. he took it in his hands, hunched over with a thick wool blanket upon his shoulders.

“how are you feeling, seungmin?” you asked with soft worry hidden in your broad voice.

seungmin always knew why he liked you for a reason; you called him by his name.

never ‘my liege’, ‘your highness’, ‘your majesty’ or any of the other titles that other knights and staff used. you calling him by his god given name was such a meaningful gesture that he fell for you the moment he met you.

seungmin doesnt like when the staff just treat him as the prince; not the booknerd who loves to sneak into the castle library late at night, not the boy who loved to ride his horse in the changing leaves in autumn, nor the boy who would sneak about the village, looking at anything and everything the farmers market.  he cupped the cool cup, bringing it closer to his chest and took it in one big gulp. the fire in the meadow caused smoke or how he ran for a while with no breaks caused a parched throat. he had been coughing since they got back to the castle, but he didnt want to stop the doctor from looking at him as he sat in the room. 

you never left the room, if you did. it was only for a moment to talk with a maid to get fresh clothes for him or to bring in the water you just handed him.

a hand resting upon his shoulder brought his reiling mind out of the events; it brought him back. he was back in the castle, back in the doctors room with a tin cup in his hands, back with you as you stared with worry infesting your eyes that he didnt like to see in your face. you shouldnt have just a loathsome emotion etched in your features.

“ye…yeah i’m fine. just still thinking about w-what happened in the meadow is all..” he spat out his thoughts before his mind could tell him to calm down. 

“are you sure, seungmin? you seemed rattled, which is understandable for what you saw…” he sometimes wishes you were never his guard. maybe a staff member, a doctor or chief. something where this level of violence and gore wasnt something either of you witnessed; but he also knew that wouldnt be fair on you. 

you both have had in depth talks about what would be different in your lives if you could choose something else. he would like to experience the other paths of life, not as a prince, maybe a farmer. but you said you would always want to be a knight. whether protecting royalty or not didnt matter, being a knight did. you always had this air of wanting to protect others at any cost.

“yes. just tired and smelling of smoke…” he tacked on a light chuckle, hoping it would ease the worry in your face. you dont deserve to have more on your plate to worry about, not if he could help it.

“i asked for a change of clothes, they should be here soon. is there anything else you need, seungmin?” wordlessy, he pulled upon their arm which brought them next to him on the bed. he rested his head against their exposed collarbones as the front of their shirt was loosened from escaping the carriage.

your scent of smoke and roses mixed too well for seungmins liking; he wanted that to be your signature scent for the rest of time. the roses brought him comfort as they were from the royal gardens while the smoke seemed to match the air you carry yourself with.

“c-can you stay here with me? i dont…want to be alone.” you sat there a little shocked at his actions; hes the prince and you’re just his knight. this level of intimacy would send anyone into shock if they saw it; but your heart ignored the screaming signals that your brain was sending.

“um…yeah seungmin, i’ll s-stay.” your voice couldnt go any louder than the whimper that left in its sted. a gloved hand slowly placed itself on seungmins broad back, the other resting upon his maple brown locks. gently you brushed back the bangs the cover his forehead to truly show his face.

whenever his hair covered the top half of his face, it made him too boyish in your opinion. but the moment they were pushed back, it opened up his face to truly show his features making him look like a mature prince that he was. regal was what bled from him, you never felt more inadequate next to someone as they simply just existed.

seungmin did have a cute, boyish prince charm that made young girls in the village gush about him whenever he was seen. you found him cute whenever he argued with his butler, changbin about waking up early or what his father wanted him to wear that day; he was still too young to be running a kingdom which is why he was still learning from his father.

in the council room, seungmins boyish charm turned into a wise, aged king as he talked about what was good for his kingdom with the people of the council. when his father wasnt speaking or in the room, the room demanded his attention. his voice may not be deep and bassy or anything; it was clear and present in the room.

those charms of his never left your mind as you watched him in every one of those moments.

the pair were cocooned in the wool blanket; it muffled every noise outside leaving them with soft breathing. seungmin looked up at you through his hooded lids; if he could he would do this all day. he never wanted to be part from you like this again.

“you have infected me…mind, body and soul. but..but it is something i wish not to be rid of, for if i am, i would simply die without knowing you are every thought and emotion i have. you may think you are just my guard, just my knight, but you mean a lot more to me than you realize.” seungmin’s words could only be heard between the two, just secrets slipped between two different worlds.

you sat there with seungmins head on your chest, speechless at his confession. you looked at him with befuddlement; a prince couldnt be in love with his knight. you felt like the air had been sucked out of your lungs; something you never thought would be spoken between you two. you thought it would just remain unsaid and unmoved upon, you could never act upon it without the risk of being killed by the king.

“you…you have also made me suffer with the feelings of loving you, seungmin. i couldn’t act upon with the fear of consequences; i would have been fine with the idea of loving you from afar. but with your true emotions out on the table, seungmin, if you are ready to go forward with this…then so am i, your highness.” your words that were whispered back filled seungmin with a warmth in his chest.

seungmin slightly pouted at the use of your highness, but he knew the manner you were using it in. you let a soft chuckle at his boyish charms again, leaning down to capture his lips in yours. dry, cracked lips moved against softer ones like cogs in a well-oiled machine to which lead to soft groans leaving the princes lips as you pushed down against the bed, the cover still over you.

only a few minutes passed with the lovers lip locked, hands moved over each other with soft caresses. but for them felt like an eternity of finally releasing the feelings that they fenced up for years. unwilling pulling away from each other, soft breaths fanned over their lips, blown pupils of different hues looked on with gratification and relief. no more far away glances, longing touches or plaguing midnight thoughts.

“can i hear you say it one more time?” his voice was slightly horse from holding his breath in the kiss. you chuckle again, also sounding slightly horse from the same experience. your hand came to his cheek, brushing softly against his cheekbone as your soaked in his features looking back at you.

“always, my love…i love you, seungmin…” low enough so no one else could hear it if they were nearby, but only so seungmin could hear it with the gentleness in your voice and features.

a toothy grin appeared on the princes face as his cheeks turned a little rosy from the heart-spoken words from you. he took his turn to reach up and caress your jaw himself, tracing a scar that traveled down your jaw and neck.

“i love you more, darling…”

the prince and his guard stayed under the blanket until the doctor came back in and shooed them off to the princes room for the rest of the night with a smirk and shake of their head at the actions of the two and to work on writing up their reports for the night.

[qwonyoung23]

CRIMSON SANDS

Crimson Sands

Prequel: The Fall of Hyunjin

Genre :- Historical romance, Mystery, Thriller, Time Travelling, Enemies to lovers, Royal AU

⋆༺𓆩𓆪༻⋆♕⋆༺𓆩𓆪༻⋆⚔︎⋆༺𓆩𓆪༻⋆♛⋆༺𓆩𓆪༻⋆⚔︎⋆༺𓆩☠︎𓆪༻⋆♕⋆༺𓆩𓆪༻⋆⚔︎⋆༺𓆩𓆪༻⋆

The unforgiving cruelty of his actions unfolded before his eyes. The coarse sand of the deserts was wet from the crimson blood flowing from the bodies of his victims. The sword at his side was covered in clotted blood, and the same was true for his royal robes. All his hard work had gone to waste. Even though he could now be the emperor, what use was that title if he had none left to rule over? The moon slowly rose, and he heard the distant howls of hyenas. The temperature had dropped significantly, and he shivered, clutching the sticky robes as he stood up. His most trusted bodyguard, Bangchan, lay crumpled on the ground like a mighty tree felled in battle. Every direction he looked revealed fallen comrades. His horse was nowhere to be seen. Shuffling through the sands, Hyunjin walked away from the tragedy. He had no sense of direction—no, he wasn't even in control of his senses. He was lost, both physically and mentally. Her smile haunted him—the last time he held her in his arms, the blood seeping through her robes brought tears to his eyes. Then he remembered his dearest friends: Seungmin, his most trusted advisor, whom he poisoned because he believed the false prophecy; his elder brother Minho, whom he eliminated to become the sole heir to the throne; his cousins Changbin, Han, and Felix, whom he expelled from the kingdom based on that same false prophecy; and finally, Jeongin, his younger brother, who was killed out of jealousy after being seen in the palace gardens with her.

Now Hyunjin was too late. He had made a fool of himself, becoming his own enemy on the path to defeating all other foes. His eyes fell on his sword. He inhaled deeply. He decided to leave this living hell. He knew that he wouldn't have a favorable afterlife due to his deeds, yet it was much better than remaining in this cruel, bleak place. The sword sliced through the air, coming into contact with his throat. As he felt the cold steel, he saw the moon turn red, and darkness greeted him.

[blankdyean]

WAAAHHHH I NEED MORE ROYALTY AUS WITH THE KIM SEUNGMIN BUT WITHOUT THEN ANGSTT 😭😭 this is honestly sad but also well written tho, I'd fall in love and escape with butler!seungmin anytime we get the chance to istg idc 💀🗣🗣🗣

Forgive Me | k. sm.

➸ synopsis: the truth was that you cared about each other in all the ways you really weren’t allowed to.

➸ starring: kim seungmin x female reader

➸ word count: 1.2k

➸ general content: butler!seungmin, duchess!reader, forbidden love, I guess this is a royal au lmao

➸ rating: teen+

➸ author’s note: another old fic but MAN as much as I claim to scream and cry for royal aus, I hardly ever write them smh

♫ perilous path- yu-peng chen, hoyo-mix(basically from the genshin impact soundtrack)

“Must you follow me into restricted areas as well?”

You folded your arms and rested your weight against the bookshelves, scowling at Mister Seungmin, who appeared to be looking for you at the end of the book-lined aisle. He tilted his head, assuming an amused expression as he took in your appearance.

“Pardon?”

“If there is one place a butler is not supposed to be, it is the library.”

“With all due respect your grace, I know you can come up with a better excuse than that to not want to see me.”

“Well-” you suddenly ran out of words, caught off guard by the slight curl of his rose tinted lips. There it was again, that despicable feeling bubbling up in your torso as you looked at his handsome face under the candlelit corner. “What is it that you want then?”

There was a flicker of something strange in his eyes for a moment, then he blinked and it was gone, taking out a handkerchief from his suit pocket and removing his glasses.

“The queen is requesting your presence in the ladies’ lounge,” he said, watching you empty your armload of books back onto the shelf. “I presume it is concerning the Suitor’s dinner happening this evening.”

A flash of anger shot through you, jealous of the one in front of you that doesn’t have a name to uphold as he put his round frames back on his nose bridge. His face took on a worried expression once he saw the distressed look in your eyes, so he took a hesitant step closer, treading on paper-thin ice.

“Your grace…are you alright?”

“Of course I’m alright,” you snapped back at him, and although a pang of guilt rocked your head from being so harsh towards who may be the only person you care about, you let your emotions get the best of you. “Why do you care anyways?”

“Why do I care?” He stepped closer, an emotion you knew well as hurt flooding his irises as he scanned your face.

It was a silly question from both of you, considering how painfully obvious the answer was.

The stares that lingered longer than they were allowed to, the peculiar circumstances you accidentally found yourselves in, the fact that you were both in the most silent corner of the library, aware that there would be no one around for hours if you did happen to run into each other…

The truth was that you cared about each other in all the ways you really weren’t allowed to.

“Your grace…” he closed his eyes, trying to gather his thoughts, and maybe his sanity as well, “...as a butler you know it is my job to-”

“Very well,” you sighed, moving past the taller man and ignoring the sinking feeling in your chest. “I will be off to the-”

You didn’t see the way he silently regretted his words, or how he internally hoped you would forgive him for his next action. All you registered was the feeling of his trembling fingers circling your wrist, stopping you from leaving.

The sheer insanity of the gesture seemed to still the air in the library, keeping both you and Seungmin frozen in place as the near-silent sound of a grandfather clock ticking was heard in the distance. Your skin could have burst into flames at that very moment; you couldn’t bear to look anywhere but the forest green carpet as Seungmin stared at where you were connected to him, as if that would make him pull you closer.

But he knows better than to put you both at risk.

The moment you feel him loosen his grip on your wrist, your last drop of restraint evaporates from your skin and you turn back to face him, locking your gaze on his. Which ironically, lets the leash snap on his end as well.

“Forgive me,” was the last thing you heard him say before pulling your wrist towards him, causing you to stumble right into him, but not before he caught you with his lips.

Only a brief moment was spared for a sharp intake of air before he crashed his lips onto yours, the gasp being silenced quickly in his desires as you reached to grip his shoulder. His hand found your waist to keep you steady, but only until you regained your balance; he pulled away far too quickly for you to say that the encounter ever happened, and you finally caught your breath again.

With wide eyes you both stared at each other, unsure of what to say or do as your labored breathing filled the aisle, much like the sound of your heart rattling your rib cage filled your eardrums.

So many emotions swam in his brown irises. Not that you could identify any of them, for there were millions more drowning in your own, you were sure.

“Your…your grace,” Seungmin’s voice quivered, just above a whisper. “My deepest apo-”

“Do you regret it?”

“I- I beg your pardon?” His eyebrows knitted together ever so slightly as you pulled away from his embrace, silken hands trembling as you tried to regain your composure.

“Do you regret stealing my heart…despite knowing that you cannot have it,” you whispered, clutching the jewels at your neckline. 

“Your gr-”

“Drop…drop the formalities,” you pleaded, voice shaking now too, “you know it has never been that way between us.”

Seeing the forbidden truth in your eyes made him retract whatever he was about to say with a labored sigh.

“Y/n.” The shivers up your spine return. “As much as it should not happen, I could never regret loving you.”

“Seungmin don’t say that,” you cried out, tears spilling out from the corners of your eyes, “if you truly loved me you would have never returned my affections from the start.”

Seungmin watched in agony as you quickly swiped the tears away, only to have more fall out from under your eyelashes.

“Do you know what it is like to wake up every day, knowing that you cannot be with the one person you wish to-”

“Yes I know exactly,” he breathed, quickly closing the distance and holding you against the bookshelf so he could catch your lips in his again. This time you fell apart, melting in his grasp as his lips glided against yours, and your cares seemed to fade like the smoke leaving the candles lining the corridor.

“I am sorry,” he whispered as he moved to kiss away your tears, holding you so close to him as you gasped from the feather light touches on your cheeks. Hearing him say that only made you pull him in for another kiss, for Seungmin could have given you a thousand apologies, but not one would pull you out from how deeply you had fallen for him.

You knew he was trained to be especially careful with you, but the gentleness that he kissed you with…it was something you had only read of in books in your teen years, something you knew came about as rarely as diamonds did. To you, he was more rare and desirable than any gemstone on the market, and yet…

Your family could not pay the price for him, to lose their eldest daughter to a lower rank for something as useless as love, in their eyes.

“Seungmin,” you choked, biting back tears. “I…” 

“I know,” he whispered, kissing your trembling lips once more before letting go of you. “I know.”

And with that, you tore yourself away, away from the library, away from what you wanted most, and saddest of all, away from the man you loved.

‧⋆ ✧˚��‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧

[healinghyunjin]

Blossom

Pairing: Kim Seungmin x Reader (fem)

Genre: crack, smut, fluff; historical!AU, magic!AU, fuck-or-die(ish)!AU, enemies(ish)-to-lovers!AU, 18+

Word Count: 6.5k

Warnings: swearing, explicit sexual content, unprotected sex, outdated sexual norms/attitudes, public sex.

Author’s Note: After another ~long~ hiatus... I'm back! The premise of this fic is heavily inspired by a super old, now deleted AO3 fic I once read for a now dead fandom (showing my age here for you children lol). I love navigating these forced interaction scenarios - so please let me know your thoughts! Feedback and reblogs are love as always - and I now have a Ko-Fi that I would really appreciate contributions to as well (linked in my Bio)! Thank you for your support~

Summary: But what this ritual required of you, the High Sorceress, was not just some spellwork or incantations - no, this ritual involved you losing your virginity. To your King - to Seungmin. On the High Table. In front of the entirety of the royal court. 

You were sure you looked like a thundercloud - dark skirts swirling, white sparks crackling from your fingertips - as you stalked through the castle towards the royal chambers.

“Milady!” Changbin chased after you, your long-suffering knight trying his best to head you off. “His Majesty is in a council meeting right now,” he huffed out. “Maybe we can seek an audience another time?”

“I don’t ‘seek audiences’ from His Majesty, Bin,” the title grating in your mouth. “I talk to Kim Seungmin when I want to talk to Kim Seungmin - especially when he wants to pretend like I don’t exist.” 

You were laying it on a bit thick. But you were the High Sorceress. You had no insignificant amount of pride yourself, and nothing made your temper flare like Seungmin outmaneuvering you - exactly like he’d just done. 

You arrived at the heavy wrought iron doors of Seungmin’s private chambers and, with a swish of your palm, sent the doors flying open, almost rattling off their hinges. A tableful of lords turned around to gawk at you - but you only had eyes for the man at the head of the table. He leaned back in his chair, watching you stalk into the room with a barely concealed grin. “And there she is.” The faint note of humor in Seungmin’s voice made you want to wring his neck.

“Your Majesty,” you greeted in the frostiest voice you could muster up. 

Seungmin smirked. “You only use my proper title when you’re fit to rip my throat out, Lady Sorceress.” 

You ignored the barb. “We have an urgent matter to discuss, my lord.”

One of the old, stodgy lords piped up in a reedy, disapproving voice. “What can take precedence over matters of council and state, Sorceress?”

“Matters of national security, Lord Park.” Seungmin rose to his feet, making everyone else jump up to theirs as well. “Council is adjourned, my lords.”

You held your head high as the councilmen streamed out of the room around you, some barely bothering to disguise their resentment. Seungmin sauntered his way around the table, coming to stand right in front of you. You scowled as you inevitably had to tilt your head back just to look into his amused face. 

“You’ve been avoiding me, my witch.” 

“I wasn’t avoiding you,” you snapped back, cringing at how petulant you sounded even to your own ears. 

Of course you’d been avoiding him. Ever since he’d slapped those scrolls down on your worktable a week ago now, you hadn’t been able to think about him without flushing, let alone be in the same room as him. It would be for the good of the people, he’d announced crisply, looking so tall and prim and regal as he towered over you sitting on your little garden stool. I’m sure you won’t see any harm in it. You’d scanned through the parchment, ignoring the scribe’s careful translations to parse the ancient runes yourself. It outlined an ancient magical ritual to replenish the barrier wards for your nation if they ever fell - which they had. But what this ritual required of you, the High Sorceress, was not just some spellwork or incantations - no, this ritual involved you losing your virginity. To your King - to Seungmin. On the High Table. In front of the entirety of the royal court. 

Seungmin snapped you out of your thoughts with a brief “Ahem,” quirking a skeptical eyebrow at you. “I haven’t seen you in a week. Every time I’ve gone to your rooms since the day I gave you those scrolls, you’re conveniently ‘not there,’ and that poor fool,” he flicked a thumb over to point at Changbin, “is stuck trying - and failing - to make excuses for you.”

You shot a glare over at Changbin - he didn’t look sufficiently embarrassed of himself, but you would deal with that later. “Well, I’m here now, my lord. And I’d appreciate it if you could tell me how you unilaterally decided to add ‘Publicly Deflowering the High Witch’ to your agenda for this evening?”

You’d hoped to embarrass Seungmin, browbeat him - like you’d clearly done to Changbin, judging from the choking sound that came from next to you. But you’d underestimated your enemy. 

Seungmin sighed, clasping his arms behind his back. “Because we don’t have a choice in the matter, my dear witch. If you’d allowed me the chance to actually talk to you this week, I could have convinced you of that, and you'd have had time to prepare yourself. But - you didn’t, and so, I had to force your hand.” You shuffled uncomfortably under his piercing stare as he continued. “I know you translated the runes yourself - you know just as well as I do that this ritual needs to be done soon. Now, if we don’t want the Eastern Army taking advantage and invading us as soon as they muster up the forces. But unlike you, my lady - I don’t have the luxury to pretend like this problem will go away if I ignore it.” 

And that was exactly what you hated most about Kim Seungmin. He was smart and logical to a fault - enough so that he’d trained himself to not let pesky emotions get in the way of doing what needed to be done. You on the other hand… the less said the better on that front. 

Before you could snark something back at him or even just bristle up, Seungmin stepped away from you, rubbing his hands together. “Now that that’s been settled, I’m sure you have no more objections. Anyways, you have a busy afternoon ahead of you, Lady Sorceress. I’ve sent several maids to your chambers to help ready you for this evening - I’m sure you remember how exact the runes were in terms of preparation.” Seungmin wasn’t even bothering to hide his grin as he dismissed you with a wave of his hand, striding out of the room. 

That patronizing bastard. You briefly contemplated throwing a fireball at his laughing back - but being executed for treason wasn’t exactly the way you intended to go out. 

With a deep, soul-weary sigh, you turned on your heel to leave, resigning yourself to your fate. 

Of course, if you knew exactly how the rest of your afternoon was going to be spent, you might just have thrown that fireball at Seungmin and gotten it over with. 

After that useless showdown, Changbin frogmarched you back to your rooms, handing you off to an actually intimidating keeper - Chaeryeong, your personal maid. But, to your even greater chagrin, she wasn’t alone. As promised, an army of maids descended on you, all charged with different vicious tasks - stripping your skin bare and smooth with hot sugar paste; kneading various herbal, floral unguents into your skin before dunking you into cold and hot baths; brushing your hair out until it fairly gleamed in the fading sunlight. By the time you were passed off to Chaeryeong for her final inspection, you almost didn’t recognize yourself in the mirror. 

Chaeryeong clicked her tongue approvingly as she walked around you, tightening the laces on your virginal white chemise. “You finally look presentable, milady.”

You bristled. “Are you saying I usually don’t?”

“Last week I had to pull a twig out of your hair before sending you down to supper. There isn’t a single dress of yours that doesn’t have mudstains, milady, and you think a splash of cold water every morning or two is enough to care for your skin.” Chaeryeong looked scandalized.

You rolled your eyes. “Well, I’m glad one of us is satisfied with this situation.”

“You’re not?” 

“Why in the name of the Goddess would I be?”

“Sleeping with a man who’s young, tall, handsome, powerful, wealthy,” Chaeryeong giggled as she counted off each word on her fingers, “isn’t the worst thing in the world, milady.” She flicked you a mischievous glance as she smoothly slid to stand behind you. “Especially when the man in question has a major soft spot for you.”

You scoffed. “Kim Seungmin doesn’t have a soft spot for me, Chae. He can't even be in the same room as me without snarking at me - and I can't remember the last time he actually said anything nice to me.”

Chaeryeong’s fingers stilled in your hair as she stared you down in the mirror. “You really believe that, don’t you?” You arched an eyebrow at her in response. She let out a deep sigh. “For such a brilliant witch… you really can be dense.” She shook her head before reaching over to grab flowers to weave into your hair. “I hope you realize - the one thing standing between him and war is you. Most men - especially a King - would have just tossed you onto that table and had their way with you. And maybe they would have begged your forgiveness and understanding afterwards - maybe, if they were worried about you cursing them into oblivion. No one else would have spent a whole week waiting to try and convince you into doing this willingly.”

You opened your mouth to snap something back in your defense... and realized you had nothing to say. 

“See,” Chaeryeong murmured softly. “Sometimes it feels like you’re… willfully blind to His Majesty’s kindness towards you. He’s always treated you with respect - and made sure you’re treated with respect. I wouldn’t take that for granted, my lady - or ignore what’s behind that mask he puts up all the time.” 

As she put the final touches on your hair, you couldn’t help but reflect on Chaeryeong’s words. You had extraordinary freedom and liberties as the High Sorceress…but no, that wasn’t exactly right. You were given extraordinary freedom and liberties as the High Sorceress - by your King. If it wasn’t for his unwavering support for you - against the Council, against any and all reactionary forces - you wouldn't hold any of the power you did. Sure, he riled you up, jerked you around a bit - and you still hated just how easily he could outwit you. But you were being childish to fixate on that - to lose sight of the forest for the trees. 

“And here’s the final touch.” Chaeryeong sidled up to you with a long scrap of silk in her hands - your blindfold. “You’re not allowed to see His Majesty until the ritual starts.” Her quick fingers made short work of fastening it around your head - and being the jerk that she was, she put it on properly tight, making sure you couldn’t see a thing. “Maybe that’ll teach you to let yourself lean on him for once,” she mused, before pulling you up out of your chair with none too gentle hands. 

Chaeryeong, as always, was right. You were completely unmoored by the loss of your sight, limiting your magical abilities too. You were forced to rely completely, like a baby, on Chaeryeong to guide you through the halls to the oldest wing of the castle - and you only realized that you were in front of Seungmin when the two of you came to a sudden halt, a reverent “Your Majesty” coming from her lips. 

This was it. 

Chaeryeong subtly pulled you down into a curtsy, pinching you in the back to make sure you stayed low as she stepped away from your side. From the sound of her sharp footsteps receding down the hall and the lack of any other noise around you, you presumed she’d left - and you were now alone with your King. 

“You may rise.” Seungmin’s amused drawl sounded from somewhere high above your head. Disoriented by your imposed blindness, you stumbled a little as you stood up - but you were caught by warm hands encircling your arms, steadying you on your feet. “How low the high have fallen, hmm?” Such a tease, you thought. But the gentle tone of his voice, the circles his thumbs were rubbing into your arms… he was helping ground you, to put you more at ease - which only made you feel more guilty. 

“My lord,” you started softly - earning a harsh inhale in surprise from Seungmin. “I… I owe you an apology. My behavior earlier today - for this entire week - has been immature and not fitting for a ranking member of your court. Forgive me for my negligence.” You made to dip into a curtsy again - but Seungmin’s grip on your arms tightened, keeping you from lowering yourself. 

There was a heartbeat of silence before Seungmin responded, his voice more tender than you’d ever heard it. “I don’t know what prompted this… change, but - you don’t need to apologize. I knew we both knew this is what must be done, and I knew we were going to eventually do it - but that doesn’t make it any easier for you. You didn’t want this with me, and I know that.”

Why did that last statement sound a false note in your heart? You ignored it in favor of speaking out. “But I’ve spent the past week shirking my duty. You had to force me back in line.”

“And that is my responsibility as King, my sorceress. No harm done.” You could tell that he was leaning down closer to you, his voice loud and clear in your ear. “And remember - neither this kingdom nor I will ever forget this sacrifice.”

There was an oddly charged moment of silence after that statement - which was abruptly broken by the sensation of the ground suddenly falling away from under you. You gasped as surprisingly sturdy arms lifted you up until you were cradled against a lean, hard chest. “Seungmo!” You squeaked, the childhood nickname slipping past your lips. “S-since when were you strong enough to do this?”

There was a pause - you were positive that Seungmin had rolled his eyes at you. “Just because I don’t have bulging biceps like that bodyguard of yours doesn’t mean that I’m a weakling, witch.” 

“Well, it won’t be good to kick things off with you tripping over your feet carrying me in,” you muttered sulkily. 

You couldn’t hold back a shiver as Seungmin tsked, his warm breath ghosting across the sensitive shell of your ear. “Such disrespect for your king? Bold, given that you’re at my mercy for the next hour.” 

“Next hour? That ego of yours is still clearly giant.”

Seungmin let out a husky laugh. “It’s not the size of my ego you should be worried about right now, sweet.” You thumped a useless fist against his chest - even as your core involuntarily clenched and slickened.

There was a ear-ringingly loud blast of trumpets, followed by the creak of the gates to the ancient hall being pushed open. The murmurs and chatter of the crowd awaiting your arrival fell silent, an almost eerie hush settling in as Seungmin strode into the hall. Even with the enormous fire spluttering away in the ancient hearth, the room was always chilly; gooseflesh pimpled your arms, and you almost automatically burrowed closer into Seungmin’s neck for warmth - at least, that’s what you told yourself. The sharp raps of Seungmin’s footsteps against the flagstones came to a halt, and you were securely sat onto a hard surface - the High Table. Your sacrificial altar, you mused to yourself cynically. 

You jumped a little as you felt gentle fingers clasp your hands, giving you a firm squeeze. Those warm fingertips then ghosted across your cheeks, twining through your hair as they searched for the knot of your blindfold. Your heart was bounding in your chest, blood roaring in your ears as Seungmin leaned into you, that familiar, titilatingly musky scent of his flooding your senses as he worked to unravel the tight knot, until the blindfold finally came free. 

You blinked your eyes open to mellow, golden light - and the sight of Seungmin standing over you, watching you carefully with a small, soft smile. The great hall was awash with candlelight, long tapering candles and sticks of smoking perfume burning all around you, throwing the faces of the crowd of onlookers beyond you into shadow - but bathing Seungmin in glorious, warm light. He looked impeccably regal as he stood above you in his smart black leather doublet and swan white shirtsleeves, his royal purple ermine-edged cloak clasped around his throat. His hair was up, brushed off his forehead, and the gold of his royal circlet shone out bright against the ink black of his hair - but the brightest of all were his eyes, warm and deep brown, steady and clear as he - your King, you truly felt down to your bones for the first time - held your gaze. 

Taking a deep breath, you let yourself fall back, the ancient stone of the table icy against your spine. While you couldn’t see any of the spectators surrounding you and Seungmin - the vaulted ceiling of the great hall the only thing in your line of sight - it felt like you could sense their gaze prickling across your skin, weighing you down. But before you could let your mind wander too far, Seungmin was there, leaning over you with those broad, square shoulders, blocking your sight of anything but him. You felt your cheeks flame as his hand came up to cup your face, and  your heart skipped a beat as he pressed a petal soft kiss to your forehead, breathily whispering into your skin. “It will be good, my sweet. Trust me.”

Maybe Chaeryeong was onto something… You searched his eyes, finding so much affection and reassurance beaming back at you that you blinked your own shut - before giving him a brief nod. 

He let his lips drag over to your temple, then down to your cheek, leaving open mouthed kisses in his wake as his lips trailed lower and lower, down your jawline, down your neck - and lower. Your mind reeled, your hands fisting the flimsy material of your gown. This was supposed to be brief and impersonal - you’d even readied a lubrication charm in preparation for the inevitable. But you should have known that Seungmin wouldn’t just do an adequate job like that. You were fighting for your life to stay silent as he added his teeth into the mix, working the thin, sensitive skin of your throat until you felt the sickly sweet pain of a bruise forming. His hand slid down from your cheek so he could softly thumb at the mark - his mark - marring your skin, and when he pressed down just right on the bruise, you whimpered - and watched as his eyes darkened to black. 

From there, he was insatiable. Your hands flew up to his shoulders at the swipe of his tongue against your hardening nipple; they desperately slid to clutch at his hair when he took it whole into his mouth, the wet heat tantalizing even through the cotton of your chemise. He palmed your neglected breast hard, the soft flesh spilling through his fingers. A whine finally tore itself free from your throat, and Seungmin snapped his head up to look at you, lips twisting into a triumphant smirk. “I thought you weren’t going to enjoy this, Lady Sorceress.” His fingers came up to tweak your nipple - hard - as he mouthed carelessly at your other breast, his eyes watching you hungrily as you writhed under his touch. The pleasure carried you away on a hazy cloud of lust, into the dreamland of dangerous possibilities. What would it feel like to have this dumb chemise out of the way, so his fingers and lips could traipse your naked skin? What would it feel like to have the heat of his bare skin pressed up against yours - the weight and friction of his hard chest crushing into your sensitive breasts?

Your attention was yanked back into the land of the living at sudden, discordant noise: gasps and murmurs, you quickly realized, rippling through your audience - for your King was dropping to a knee at your feet, hands sliding with promise up your legs under your chemise. You shot up onto your elbows, staring down at him in horror. “Your Majesty,” you hissed. “This is wanton.”

Seungmin arched an eyebrow. “I’d rather be wanton than have you in pain at my hands.” You felt a traitorous flutter in your chest. “And most importantly - when you have the kingdom’s most powerful woman laid out in front of you... you worship her.” 

Those large, long-fingered hands of his found purchase in the soft skin of your inner thighs, forcing them spread and keeping them spread with that hidden strength of his. He let out a small groan at the sight of your swollen folds, dragging a single, deliberate fingertip down the length of your slit. At the very first touch of his soft lips to your sensitive bundle of nerves, you choked out a moan - and startled as the candles around you all simultaneously popped. From between your legs, Seungmin laughed darkly. “Looks like I won’t need to ask you whether I’ve done a good job,” he said, the sensation of his breath and lips against your core making you squirm with stimulation. His hands slid up to your hips, anchoring you in place as he lapped languidly at your cunt, tongue flicking in and out of your aching entrance, nose rubbing up against your swollen little pearl. 

There was no chance in hell you could stay quiet any more. As a moaning keen spilled forth from your lips, your eyes flicked up to the shadowy figures in the crowd watching you. You’d thought they would be judgmental - critical, gossipy, as people always were in situations like this. Instead… there wasn’t a face you could make out that wasn’t flushed, expression glazed over. Seungmin slid his arms under your legs, yanking you down the table until the base of your spine rested on the very edge of the table, your core putty under his mouth as he supported your weight - and you watched as some woman in the crowd whimpered, biting her lip in response. 

Your head lolled back onto the table, and you started shuddering in Seungmin’s hands. 

“I guess I was wrong about needing an hour.” With a final kiss to your folds, Seungmin rose to his feet, leisurely wiping his mouth on the back of one hand, the other drifting down to the laces of his trousers. “I didn’t anticipate just how thoroughly you would enjoy my attentions, my witch.” Tease. His eyes danced with mirth as you whined in annoyance. You felt the blunt tip of him dragging through your folds, its weight catching deliciously against the tight ring of your entrance. “I’ll start slow,” he murmured, a hand coming up to brace himself above your head. And from the first breach of his length into your walls, you knew you were in trouble. 

“Big,” you gasped out. Seungmin let his free hand run loose over the flesh of your thighs and hips, kneading and caressing and soothing. “Relax for me, sweet - it’ll be easier if you let me in.” His voice was breathy and soft, eyes so warm - daresay loving - as he leaned in over you, covering your body with his. You gave him a small nod, breathing deeply and doing your best to let your body sink into the stone under you. As he carefully, firmly worked the rest of his length into your tight cunt, you couldn’t help but whimper, eyes squeezing shut at the deep, deep stretch of him, your spine arching off the table as your body contorted to accommodate him. “Beautiful,” he murmured, pupils dilated with lust. “Made to take me.” 

And as the sting and discomfort started to morph into the burning, insatiable stretch of pleasure, you were inclined to agree with him. 

“Let me know when I can move, sweet,” he asked, the flat of his hand rubbing soothing circles into your lower belly. “Please,” you rasped out - and the delightedly vicious grin that curled his lips in response only sent another surge of fire through you. Your limbs ached to twine around him, pulling him down into you, imprisoning him between your legs - but you were determined to maintain some public decorum. Seungmin made the decision for you though, salaciously bold as ever as he leaned forward into you, splaying your legs out wide, knees almost to your chest. He tested the waters with a rapid snap of his hips in and out - and the two of you stared at each other with wide eyes at just how deep it all felt in this position. Seungmin’s hips started rocking back and forth, almost as if on their own volition - almost as if they were enchanted - and your hands desperately scrabbled for purchase on the unyielding stone as he started pounding into you. 

Your hips canted up into his, trying to answer his thrusts with your own. And you were clearly doing something right, judging by his drawn out groans. “Mine,” he moaned. As he bore down on you, every thrust ground delicious friction into your bundle of nerves - and Seungmin’s hips were driving into yours at such a punishing pace that you were overwhelmed by stimulation. You were sure the two of you were making an absolute mess, the squelching sounds of him pumping into you only growing louder with every thrust. Just with his lips and nose and tongue, the friction and sensation and pleasure had all already brought you close to the cliff of your peak. You knew it wasn’t going to be much longer now before he dragged you over - but there was something positively strange happening to you. Your pleasure was merely riding the edge of some deeper, powerfully visceral sensation that had you gasping, shivering with every plunging stroke. But Seungmin, your ever-wise, your ever-aware Seungmin, had cottoned onto what was happening to you - and wrapping you tightly up into his arms, he only picked up the pace of his hips. “Let go, sweet,” he eked out. “I’ve got you safe, here - let go, my queen.” And before your mind could even process what he’d just given away, you felt yourself clenching up, eyes squeezing shut and nerves singing in pleasure as you hit your release - the pain of your fingers digging into the broad expanse of his back, the spasms of your tight cunt triggering Seungmin’s release simultaneously, spurts of his hot, thick seed flooding into your core, serving as a balm for your aching walls as he collapsed into your waiting arms. 

Before you could let the waves of pleasure carry away your mind with it, however - your eyes shot open at the gasps and shouts coming from around you. Gold - that was all you could see - a golden bubble encasing you and your King. Seungmin lifted his head up from where it was pillowed on your chest, a look of pure wonder on his face as the two of you watched the bubble slowly float and collapse inwards, coalescing into a glowing yellow orb hovering above all of your heads. The hazy whorls of incense and candle smoke in the air took on a bright golden hue - before it all whooshed outwards in a rapid gust of wind, rattling the windows of the hall as the orb and its golden mist exploded out into the sky . You recognized the magic for what it was - the largest, purest barrier charm you’d ever witnessed. 

You and Seungmin had pulled it off. A giggle of delight squeezed out of your chest, and you let your gaze snap back down to the man resting on his elbows over you. Seungmin was watching you with a small, mysterious smile, panting slightly as he tried to catch his breath. And as you looked back at him… you felt a wave of emotion wash over you, as powerful as if the ground had literally shifted under your feet. An almost unbearable fondness filled your heart as you beheld him - your King, your protector…your lover. 

You had been right about one thing - there would be no going back from this, at least for you. But now you found yourself wondering… why was that such a bad thing?

Ignoring the shuffling footsteps around you as your audience slowly started to disperse, you let your arms wrap around Seungmin, relishing the feeling of his muscles bunching under your touch as he slid his arms in turn around you, helping you to sit upright. His dark eyes were fixed on the place the two of you were joined as he slowly extricated himself from you, the feeling of his sticky seed trickling out from between your legs strange and foreign. That ever intelligent, searching gaze then slowly scanned your body, looking you over head to toe as he tucked himself away in his trousers, before his eyes fluttered shut. Seungmin let out a slow exhale before blinking his eyes open again - and you were startled to see that professional mask of his slide back into place. 

“Up you go,” he murmured, arm sliding around your back as he helped you off the table, supporting you as your legs quailed under your weight. With a few deft pulls, he unfastened his cloak, wrapping it around your shoulders instead. You were thankful for the warmth it provided - and the coverage, you realized, as you noticed the servants hovering at a respectful distance from the two of you. “Give me a second,” Seungmin said before turning away to address his valet and knight-at-arms. 

One of the maids stepped forward, a fan in her hand to put out the few lingering candles. Before you could even hesitate on what to do, she dipped into a low curtsy, bowing her head - to you. “Your Highness,” she breathed out, an almost reverent look on her face as she glanced back up at you. Awkward with the unfamiliar courtesy, you smiled hesitantly, tilting your head at her in acknowledgement. 

How had you misjudged this situation so badly? Part of your hesitation leading up to all of this had been because you’d thought that you’d be made out to be a slag - no better than the King’s kept woman. Why hadn’t you appreciated the power inherent in this? With the spectacular care with which he’d pleasured you, with the demonstration of your magic in front of the whole court, Seungmin had marked you - just as he’d told you with those hungry eyes - out to be the most powerful woman in the kingdom. 

You snapped out of your thoughts to see Seungmin making his way back to stand in front of you. You frowned to see that mask of his still in place, a strange awkwardness in his manner as he addressed you. “I can help you back to your rooms now. Or,” he turned to gesture behind him, “one of the servants can take you if you prefer.”

You arched a critical eyebrow at him. “Could we go to your chambers instead?”

His eyes widened for a second, before you watched understanding wash over his face. “Ah yes, that was careless of me - there’s too many stairs to get back to your chambers. You can rest in mine as long as you need.”

Wrapping an arm loosely around you, he let you lean on him as the two of you walked out of the hall. His rooms weren’t too far away, the royal chambers taking up a significant portion of the ancient wing of the castle. But an awkward silence reigned over the two of you, Seungmin stoically looking straight ahead as you limped along beside him. 

Something had clearly changed in you - because for once, instead of being the reactive fool you normally were, you saw the situation - and his reaction - for what it actually was. Seungmin was taking his turn to be the awkward overthinker - a role he’d grown out of once he’d become King… except when it came to a few specific things he couldn’t stay purely rational about. The things he cared about the most, the things that mattered most deeply… in this case - you. 

You sighed. You’d probably need to gift Chaeryeong a necklace or something after all of this was over. 

You bided your time until Seungmin finally shut the two of you into his chambers. He’d turned away to lock the doors behind him - and startled when he turned back around to find you standing right in front of him. As you stared up at him, watching his lips twitch in discomfort… you came to a shocking realization. 

“You never kissed me,” you breathed out, even more surprised as you said it. He’d kissed you literally everywhere else - but he hadn’t touched your lips. You gazed up at him with wide eyes. “Why?”

Seungmin shifted uncomfortably. “It felt too…intimate.”

What? “You took my virginity - in public. We unleashed a magical force field together,” you deadpanned, trying to get a laugh out of him - and failing, as Seungmin continued to look at you stoically. “I’d say that’s pretty intimate, my lord.”

He shrugged, hugging his arms around him and hesitating for a second - before bluntly, in Seungmin fashion, getting to the heart of the matter. “The reality is that… freely given sacrifice, prophecy, whatever you want to call it - I took something from you that you didn’t mean for me to have.” It was a testament to Seungmin’s poise that his voice stayed even, his eyes stayed steadily on you as he spoke. “I wanted you to have something - a part of you - you could still give away of your own will.” He sagged heavily into the doorframe, finally breaking eye contact as he trailed off. 

Poor baby. Your heart fluttered. “That is… quite thoughtful of you, my lord,” you choked out, taking a small step forward. Then another. And another, inching towards him. “So - that means it’s alright with you for me to do this, right?” Reaching up, you twined your arms around his neck, pulling yourself up onto your tiptoes to press your body into his. His hands reflexively grabbed your waist, steadying you even as his eyes widened in surprise - before fluttering shut as you pressed your lips to his. 

His mouth was divine heat - soft, pliable against yours. He gasped as you nipped at his lower lip, and you seized the chance to lick into his mouth, deepening the kiss until your head was whirling, ignorant of where you ended and he began. 

When you finally pulled away for air, his lips chased yours for a second before he caught himself. You giggled, beaming up at him. “How low the high have fallen, hmm?”

Seungmin let out a low warm laugh, such fondness in his eyes that you couldn’t help but shy away. “I have much, much lower to fall still, don’t worry,” he murmured as he bent down over you, his hair falling into his eyes as he smiled. In a single, smooth movement, he flipped the two of you around so he had you pinned up against the wall, his body pressed firmly into yours. 

You cleared your throat. “Y-you really like having me against hard surfaces, don’t you?”

He shrugged, focus elsewhere as his fingers busied themselves with the laces of your chemise. “Seems like it’s the only way to keep you good for me, witch mine.” You whined as his hand accidentally grazed your sore, tender nipple, the sound making his eyes snap back to yours. A dark, wicked smile curled his lips before he crashed his mouth back onto yours, long fingers working your breast deliberately, possessively. You responded with enthusiasm, tangling your own fingers into his silky hair, until the spell was broken - for you at least - by loud noises from outside his chambers. 

You pulled away from his lips with a loud smack. “What’s that?”

“Never mind that,” he rasped out, pulling you in tight against him. “Worry about it later.” Your breath hitched as he nosed his way into your neck, pulling at the loosened neck of your chemise to expose your collarbone for him to feast on. 

Steeling yourself, you pushed your hands firmly against his chest. “Seungmo, I want to worry about it now.” He groaned, rolling his eyes, but let you go without a fight, releasing you from his embrace. Turning on your heel, you tugged him along to his balcony. The sounds had seemed to come from the royal gardens, which were sprawled right below Seungmin’s chambers. Pulling your cloak - his cloak - more tightly around you, you stepped out onto the balcony - and froze, as an astounding sight brought the two of you to a standstill. 

Wherever you looked - below you, around you - every single plant and tree was in abundant bloom. Regardless of season, of age - fruit and flowers were everywhere, swinging in the breeze, littering the ground. You turned to Seungmin in shock - only to see him looking back at you with loving, wondrous awe. “That’s all you,” he murmured, brushing a fond hand against your cheek. “My powerful, mesmerizing sorceress.”

You flushed. “No, it’s not.” You stepped closer to him, wrapping your arms around his waist. “It’s us.” You tiptoed up to press a kiss into his cheek - and promptly hid into Seungmin’s neck as whoops and cheers rang up to you from the gardens below. 

Seungmin laughed, tucking you into his side as he led the two of you back inside. “Well, you know what this means,” he said.

You quirked an eyebrow at him. “What?”

Shooting a dazzling smile your way, he caught you up in his arms once again, the heady sensation already warm and familiar to you - before peremptorily throwing you onto his bed. 

“The fate of the flora of this kingdom is in our hands, Lady Sorceress.” He intoned in a faux serious voice - made only the more ridiculous by the sight of him crawling on all fours towards you on the bed. “We have crucial work to do, milady - and we must start posthaste.”

You threw your head back in laughter before wrapping your limbs around him. “Yes, my lord - let’s start immediately.” 

Fin.

~

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[edenesth]

TWTHH Spinoff: Written in the Stars [Teaser]

Pairing: military strategist!Mingi x royal physician!reader

AU: historical au (Joseon era)

Summary: Mingi had spent countless years searching for the angel who saved his life when he was on the verge of death. He believed god was on his side when she finally reappeared before him, but she was now so near yet so far, so unobtainable. No longer just a young medical trainee, she had become an esteemed royal physician—a woman working within the palace walls. And what did that mean? It meant she now belonged to His Majesty.

A/N: Credits to @sundaybossanova for contributing the main idea of Mingi's spinoff. I might have changed most of the proposed plot, but the MC's identity as a physician and how the two first meet remains Sunny's idea.

Main Story | Spinoff Masterlist | Part 1

"Ooh, guess who's here again," your colleague remarked, nodding toward the entrance of the royal medical hall where a certain tall, handsome military strategist strode in for what felt like the thousandth time this week. You sighed, refusing to look up from your book. "Please tell me it's not him."

She gulped, watching him approach. "Hate to break it to you, but it is your not-so-secret admirer, General Officer Song."

"Good afternoon, ladies. I, uh… I'm here today because—" his familiar deep voice rang out as he paused at a respectful distance.

Clearing your throat, you finally closed your book and turned to face him with a courteous smile, finishing his sentence for him, "Good afternoon to you too, Officer Song. Let me guess, you're here because you got hurt during training again?"

Instead of the usual sheepish nod, he shook his head and nervously fiddled with his fingers. "No, actually… I came to ask if… i-if you would like to accompany me to the royal banquet celebrating Joseon's unity with Ruhon tonight, Royal Physician Ahn?"

You froze at his question, and your colleague mirrored your reaction. The two of you exchanged bewildered glances, trying to process the fact that this fool was openly pursuing you, a woman working in the palace, someone who belonged to the King.

Does he realise what he's doing?

You're probably wondering why I'm posting this on a Wednesday (depending on where you are) but it's a public holiday here today in Malaysia, so surprise!! It's finally Princess Mingi's turn! The way y'all thought his spinoff would be the first and here he is HAHA

In case you're confused and are not sure what I mean by MC belonging to the King, please read ✨this✨

As always, I'll do my best to get the first part out as soon as I can! Let me know your thoughts on the concept! <3

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All Rights Reserved © edenesth // DO NOT REPOST, TRANSLATE, PLAGIARISE OR REPURPOSE.

[kidrauhlschik]

Let The World Burn. - I.N.

1. The New King and Queen

-

-

In the end, he managed to forget that a king is nothing without his queen.

-

~

Part 2 will be linked in the master list above!

Pairings: Jeongin x Reader (and some love triangles among the way.) enemies to lovers, royalty au!

Warnings: ANGST, implied smut, war, aggression, anxiety, depression, death, please let me know if i miss anything... (this was heavily inspired by the song “Let the world burn” by Chris Grey.

Word Count: 3.5k

~

You had your destiny planned out for you since before you were born. While your mother, the queen of Eldoria, still carried you, your father, alongside the King of Rexerum, forged an alliance between their two kingdoms.

The Queen and King of Rexerum were a powerful pair, ruling their realm with vigor and passion, in slight contrast to your parents, who led their kingdom with kindness and a deep sense of unity. Rexerum was one of the strongest kingdoms of its time, invincible and unwavering. An alliance among the two kingdoms was deemed to be the best strategic decision of the millenium.

When Prince Yang Jeongin was just a year old and you were still in the womb, both kingdoms decided to unite. Once the King of Rexerum passed, it was decreed that the two of you, once of age, would marry and lead both nations to greatness.

You had always known of this, at only six years old, you received the first letter from you betrothed.

"Hello, I am Jeongin. I am looking forward to a happy future with you." Though brief and simple, the letter was deeply meaningful to a six year old's heart. To you, it felt like a fairytale coming to life. What young girl doesn’t dream of her Prince Charming?

At the age of ten, you received a gift from the prince. A locket with a letter. "Hold on to this locket, and one day you will place a petal from your wedding bouquet inside." You wore that necklace every day after you received it.

At the age of sixteen you finally knew what your future husband looked like. You received a painting that took months to arrive to your homeland. He was very attractive, with fox-like features, sharp eyes, and a cheshire smile. He looked full of life and kind, almost like a dream to your sheltered eyes.

When you turned nineteen, you finally received the final letter. It was from Jeongin, announcing that his father passed away due to an unexpected illness. He didn't explain much aside from the fact that his father was bedridden for weeks before he finally succumbed to a sickness that you couldn't quite understand. The last words of the letter being, "See you soon, my love."

Despite the dire circumstances, you couldn't help but feel excitement. A queen of a country and a bride on the same day seemed overwhelming but very exciting to you. The roses that sat in every corner of your room seemed brighter all of the sudden, like it was their own farewell to you.

Being sheltered from the world, due to your parents putting everything on the alliance, you were not allowed to leave the castle unless it was absolutely necessary. Only learning the world through stories and teachings. As much as you mourned you father-in-law-to-be, it meant the start of your new life.

Your mother, in her stunning blue and black dress, bid you farewell in tears, wishing you the best and telling you that if everything goes well, this would be the last time you'd see her, because after your boat sailed, your duties as princess of Eldoria, would be nothing in comparison to your rights as the queen of Rexerum. Her crown shined under the sun, made from pure silver, and decorated by sapphires and diamonds, so intricate and delicate, it made you wonder what the crown you would wear in Rexerum would look like.

Your father told you to be strong, he was never a man of affection, but he held you close and whispered, "Be careful my daughter." Before you left your homeland and parents.

On the sail to Rexerum, you held on to your locket that still sat around your neck. Nervous and anxious, but at least you knew that Jeongin would be waiting for you at the end of the road. You loved him, despite never meeting him, but maybe you were living in a fairytale that you never wanted to reach the end of.

The ship took four days to arrive to Rexerum, the only person that kept you company was your advisor and best friend Lee Felix, who kept your spirits up anytime you felt hopeless or homesick. He was your rock. "You are going to be an amazing queen your highness." Was his go-to phrase, as you rolled your eyes at the term, 'your highness.' He was your best friend, and you've told him that the formalities could be dropped behind closed doors, but at this point, he was saying such things with no purpose but to get under your skin.

When you finally arrived to the foreign kingdom, a crowd awaited you. The citizens of this new country, welcomed you with open arms, all hoping to catch a glimpse of their queen-to-be.

The man that held his arm out to you at the dock was not your future husband, much to your disappointment. You understood why Jeonjin couldn't be there though. His father had just passed, and now he was preoccupied with the arrangements of the wedding and coronations of the both of you. He is a king afterall now, is what you told yourself.

The horses leading your carriege couldn't be any slower. You were practically shaking with anxiety and excitement to finally fulfill what you were born to do.

However, when you finally arrived to the castle, you were caught off guard. You were raised in a palace full of light, flowers surrounded every wall, your followers would come and go as they pleased in order to meet the royal family, the air was happy and free. You couldn't help but notice the stark differences in your new home, surrounded by soldiers and walls. The castle seemed gloomy and even the servants would keep their head down and wouldn't dare to make eye contact with you.

It caught you off guard when you were lead through the back entrance by soldiers who only addressed you as, "My grace."

They led you to a room on the third floor in the place, the room a bit bigger than your old one at home.

"Your belongings will arrive shortly my grace, please make yourself comfortable and enjoy your stay," The guard still wouldn't make eye-contact with you, which made you slightly uncomfortable because you were raised with the belief that every person in your country is your family. You stand for the people and someone not seeing you as such, is very out of your comfort zone.

A day went by, and you still hadn't met your husband-to-be.

"It feels stuffy in here." Felix said, as he opened the windows of your new bedroom.

"I'm sure this is just a spare room, once I move to Jeongin's room, it'll be better." You said as your new ladies prepared your wedding dress. A white, flowy dress with loose sleeves, and beautiful embroidery awaited you. One of your ladies, Rose, if you remembered correctly, was putting your hair up with a flower shaped clip. She didn't say much, aside from agreences.

"I hope so, because this place feels depressing." Felix looked at your reflection on the mirror as you sighed out loud. "I know, but maybe the prince is preparing something special." Rose's movements halted for a second at your words, you only realized because of the eye contact she made with you through the mirror before focusing on you hair again. She seemed worried or maybe hesitant, but then again, this was a huge shift in the kingdom so it was expected.

That night is when you were to walk down the aisle, yet you couldn't help but adore this new sense of freedom you received. No longer under your parents rule, but under your own. The servants wouldn't say much to you aside from telling you about your itinerary. Lunch with the queen, dressing ceremony, walking down the aisle, consummation, and living the rest of your life with the King.

You woke up the morning of your wedding feeling a sense of wonder, your luncheon dress was ready, sky blue, long, and made from silk, was prepared for your meeting with the queen, but since your anxiety wouldn't let you rest prior to the lunch, you decided to wonder the garden.

The garden was the only place that reminded you of home. Roses and daisies surrounded the area. Wisteria flowers decorated the fences and walls. The place felt serene and free in comparison to the gray walls that surrounded the palace.

That morning, you took advantage of your new found freedom and asked Felix to accompany you in search for your wedding bouquet.

You roamed around the pond on the west side of the palace, finding red and white flowers to build your wedding bouquet. Felix made you a flower crown, made from peonies and jasmines, as you hopped around the area boasting about your future filled with excitement.

Felix feigned happiness, although he wished that in another world, another life, his status would be higher, or yours lower, so he could maybe, possibly dream of a world that you would see him as more than a friend or advisor. He was happy for you nevertheless.

You were unaware that through a window on the fourth floor of the palace, your future husband was observing you. "Foolish." He whispered under his breath as the arms of his beloved enveloped him from behind in a warm embrace.

"Let her be." Rose said as she graced her lips against his neck, his body craved her warmth and chased her as she pulled away.

"I don't want to. I don't know her. I have never spoken with her. I do not understand why my parents would tie me down to someone that they didn't even know. What if her intentions are misconstructed?" Jeongin turned to Rose, who was merely covered by his robe.

"Innie, you're a king, your ties are more than trust, they are for the good of our country." Rose was always so good to him, so understanding.

"If I am the king, why can I not choose my queen? I would choose you a million times over in a heartbeat my love." He approached her as she sat on the bed.

"You know it's harder than that my love." She leaned back as Jeongin hovered over her, "Can we at least be together one more time before this afternoon?" He asked as his hands roamed her body, his hands traced her waist, her hips, and until they finally landed on her thighs, pulling one of her legs around him, "I just want to feel you again." He whispered into her ear as he pulled the robe back and felt his lover crumble with his every move.

-

You held you self-made bouquet with pride. You looked beautiful, all in preparation to meet your husband. You stood behind the doors of the coronation room. The ceremony was smaller than you expected, more a formality than anything. In your country, wedding was a celebration, a birth of a new family, a new root in a never ending garden. This was different so far, after being in Rexerum for two days, you began to notice the differences. The lines between royalty and common folk were very clear in your new nation.

Nevertheless, you waited for the priest to announce your arrival.

Once he uttered the words, "And now we welcome the princess of Eldoria and the new queen of Rexerum to our country,-" Guards opened the grand doors, and you began walking down the aisle.

Despite your nervousness, you managed to look in Jeongins direction. He was looking down, almost seeming avoidant.

When you reached the end of the aisle, you tried to offer him a smile, but he was avoiding your gaze with everything he had in him. Once you reached his side, the two of you looked forward as the priest continued the ceremony.

Eventually, he made the two of you turn to each other for the vows, once Jeongin finally made eye contact with you, he couldn’t lie to himself. You were beautiful, your eyes had a light in them that he had only seen once, in the eyes of his lover. A face so innocent, that anything could break the wonder. Your dress was beautifully embroidered to represent your old country, flowers laced the fabric so subtly. A flower crown sat on top of your head so delicately, made for you by the hands of someone that loved you so well.

Yet he couldn’t help himself but to look at you with resentment, no emotion behind his brown eyes, his jaw locked and stiff, he was looking down at you and all of the sudden you felt small beneath his gaze.

You are a princess and a queen-to-be, feeling small was something you weren’t used to. Yet, beneath the king of Rexerum, you felt like nothing but a peasant. The man you built in your delusions was not present in your wedding.

"I stand before you, as the king of the great country of Rexerum, bound by duty. I vow to honor this union. May we find harmony in our shared path. I, King Yang Jeongin, take you, YN LN, to be my wife. I offer you my crown, my kingdom, my protection, my name, and my duty. I promise to fulfill the obligations of this union, as dictated by tradition, and to honor our commitment in the eyes of our realm. May our paths intertwine until…” he takes a deep breath, “until the end of our days." After his vows, he slips a ring so shiny that it could blind you, onto the ring finger on your left hand.

After hearing his vows and reading the room, you felt truly out of place. Nervousness seeps into your bones, a feeling you’d never felt before. With a shaky breath, you let your eyes wonder Jeongin's surroundings. You spot his mother, Queen Dowager, standing off to the side, poised and proper as all queens should be.

You try to calm yourself to keep face, but then you spot your advisor, Felix, he looks somber, almost as if he could read your thoughts. He gives you a small nod of encouragement, so you force yourself to collect your thoughts and turn back to your husband-to-be, and put all of your royal training and preparations to utter the next words.

"I, YN LN, humbly accept the honor of becoming your queen. With reverence for the history and the future of our kingdom, I vow to stand by your side in prosperity and adversity. I promise to carry the mantle of royalty with dignity and grace, to support you in your reign, and to cherish our realm and its people. May our union illuminate the shadows and strengthen our bond as we journey through life together, as partners and sovereigns." The shortened version of your vows is all you could muster. Of course this is an arranged marriage, but you thought that he at least cared about you. He was the one that had been writing you letters for so long, you wondered if the same man that stood before you was remotely the same person you imagined at all.

Once you slipped the ring on his finger, the two of you turn back to the priest and get on your knees.

"May the blessings of the divine rest upon this union of hearts and kingdoms. As you, King Jeongin, and you, Queen YN, embark on this journey together, may your love be steadfast and your commitment unwavering. May wisdom guide your decisions, compassion soften your hearts, and unity strengthen your reign. Let peace reign within your palace and prosperity within your lands. May your union be a beacon of hope and inspiration to all. In the presence of all who witness, I pronounce you King and Queen, bound in sacred matrimony. May your days be filled with joy, and may your love endure for all time." As the priest finished his speech, you felt someone take off the flower crown felix had made you and replace it with a weight on the top of your head. A golden crown embellished with rubies and pearls sits on the top of your head, almost the opposite of the silver crown that decorated your mother’s head on the day of your departure.

The guests stand and clapped for their new rulers. Everyone of them bowing as you and Jeongin made your way out of the room. The second you step through the doors, Jeongin leaves your side, walking down the other side of the hallway.

"Hey!" You call out before your mind catches up with you. He halts in his steps and doesn't even bother to turn around to look at you. You're not even sure why you called out to him. It's foolish.

"What's going on? Have I misunderstood this union? Why are you upset?" With that, he turns around, unmoving from his spot.

"I am upset because my life was dictated for me before I could speak. This union is for convenience. Do not think of it as more than that." With those words he continues to walk down the hallway, indifferent, leaving you confused and distraught.

He leaves you with your thoughts, he was a man that you didn't know. Your husband, a man that had a whole life before you, and apparently wasn't willing to share his story. You begin to wonder if those letters you received were written by him in the first place.

When the time for the consummation ceremony came, you were scared and nervous. Being a virgin and unaware made you feel small among all of the things that were belittling you on the same day. You did not feel like a queen. You felt as if the world was shaking beneath you. Too fast and too big, the world is unforgiving, and you are coming to learn that very quick.

The night, began before you could collect your thoughts. After being led back in to your room, you were rushed into taking off your dress for a much simpler attire, just covered by a robe, delicate and embroidered, you were lead to a room that had sheer curtains surrounding it. You knew that there were numerous people surrounding you. A priest, the court, and the royal family were all observing you, alone.

Your nerves were off the roof. You felt uncomfortable, anxious and scared. How could you feel okay, surrounded by strangers observing you? As you let your your skin rise and your body tense up, you heard a sound, a distant door.

Before long, Jeongin came through the door of the open bedroom. You backed away from where you were standing out of caution.

He held his hands out and kept his face serene. "I am sorry about earlier, but this is our duty as rulers." He said as he approached you. You knew better. He meant well, so you allowed his approaches to continue, unmoving.

As he sat face-to-face with you, you began to really see him. Not in a painting, or in a story. You saw the human being you were intended to marry before you were born.

His sharp features seemed much softer up close. His eyes were soft, admiring, and glowing. When he put his hands around your waist, he was careful, almost as if he could break you.

"You are my queen. Only me and you matter at this moment." He said as he softly held your face with his left hand so you couldn't look at the crowd, forcing you to only focus on him.

With his right hand, he pushed the silk of your robe back, holding your waist. He guided your face towards his own, staring into your eyes. This is the Jeongin you always imagined, and he was finally there for you.

He noticed your hesitation and fear by your shaky form. He pulled your body towards him. His warmth felt strange as you had never been close to someone before then. His sharp gaze softened. His cheshire smile became soft and tame. He felt safe, and even though the safety was only fleeting, you held on to it at the moment.

"It's okay." He whispered as the both of you were inches apart.

You took the initiative and moved forward, grazing his lips. He made the final move and locked his lips with yours. The kiss was soft, as if he was aware to be gentle with you. His touches were gentle and careful. He made you feel safe.

He backed you up to the bed, and hovered over you. His hand reached the strap of your nightgown before he paused, "May I?" You managed to nod despite being flustered. He lowered the gown and once you were exposed, he took you in.

He appreciated every part of you and kissed everywhere he could. He made the consummation feel easy. Although you were uncomfortable at first, Jeongin pulled every stop to make sure you were always comfortable and under pleasure.

The experience made you confused.

After being so gentle with you, he had to care for you. Right?

~

A/N: This was supposed the be larger but I will break it into parts instead. Thank you for reading! I will make a taglist if enough people care lol

[imfoive]

Crystal Bird - Chapter 8

Crown Prince! Chan x Princess (fem.) Genre: Royal au! Angst, Romance, Historical, hidden identity, slow-burn Warnings: mentions of war, assassination, animal hunting/cruelty, disease, death, somewhat proofread WC: 6.3k A/N: god I loved writing this chapter!! I’m so excited for the next one! Feedback, Reblogs, Likes are greatly appreciated! Happy reading! ── MASTERLIST

Synopsis: The Crown Prince is saved by the Princess of a rival kingdom, and he swears his second life to his savior. A forbidden friendship no one knew of, grows deeper with every secret meeting. As the two are kept apart, memories of their sunset playdates by the serene river, begin blossoming into something beautiful. Cheeks blushed, stomach butterflies fluttered at the thought of each other. Years of yearning and imagining had only made them crave a sweeter reunion. And finally meeting at a Royal banquet, he could only stare at the now grown Princess, taken by her beauty, while she only watches as he gives his heart to the wrong princess.

Missed a chapter? - Prologue / Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5 / Chapter 6 / Chapter 7

CHAPTER 8 ───────────────────

The sound of horses trotting echoed through the Grand Forest, the terrain suddenly foreign yet familiar to Chris who had visited briefly on his first day in Elysium. Tell-tale signs of his carvings that he had marked the trees with, still vaguely visible against the wood, but this time, he felt out of place. 

Surrounded by haughty noble lords who laughed among themselves, he spotted Prince Ian ahead, engrossed in conversation with his friends. The foreign princes remained silent on their horses, observing and waiting at the rear end of the group.

Glancing at Hyunjin, Chris noted the way the Sylvancrest Prince took in the foreign greenery, clearly amazed. It seemed he had reverted to his polite, naive demeanor, as if their tense game of chess had never occurred. Hyunjin caught Chris’ gaze, his lips curving into a smile that irritated the Nightshade Prince, prompting him to quickly look away.

Their guards, Han and Seungmin, lingered several yards back among the Elysium Knights accompanying their hunting party, their attention fixed on their respective princes.

Han felt uneasy, acutely aware that Minho was somewhere in the forest, perhaps in the midst of completing his own mission. Chris’ earlier remark about the possibility of an ambush, even if meant as a joke, lingered in his mind, an unsettling thought that something dangerous could unfold hadn’t left his mind.

The warrior guard would have taken a deep breath to rid him of his anxious thoughts. He would have convinced himself that nothing unusual would happen that afternoon. But a sudden stench of blood filled his nose. A distant, but lingering smell that made him stare straight ahead to his Prince’s form, aware that Prince Christopher had probably picked up on it as well.

The Nightshade Prince’s eyes narrowed, his sharp gaze suddenly scanning the lush greenery around them, instantly guarded as he caught a whiff.

The metallic stench of blood hung faintly in the air, a looming scent that only the Nightshade Warriors seemed to detect, it seemed. Hyunjin remained absorbed in the foliage, while Ian and his entourage appeared completely unbothered, laughing and chatting as if nothing was amiss. 

   “Are you ready princes?” One of the young lords exclaimed as the group gathered, their horses forming a circle. 

They began discussing what was to come.

The rules were straightforward. The more kills, the more points. Bigger kills earned double points, and the winner would receive a thousand gold coins.

   “Last year, Prince Ian got a moose!” Another young noble had exclaimed, impressed anew as he recalled the memory.

Chris and Hyunjin exchanged glances as they watched Ian try to downplay his achievement. Yet the grin on his face and the smug expression betrayed his pride.

   “Knowing Prince Hyunjin’s nature from the brief time I’ve had to observe him, it’s safe to say he isn’t particularly skilled with a bow. Isn’t that right, Prince Hyunjin?” Ian almost snickered, turning to the Sylvancrest prince. 

Hyunjin maintained his calm demeanor, his lips thinning into a smile.

   “Maybe. I’m not very competitive so your observation might be accurate indeed.” Hyunjin replied, his words dripping with politeness. 

The other young nobles erupted in “Ohhh’s,” clearly amused by his calm retort.

All this was pre-game banter. Jabs that were meant to rile everyone up, to make them unleash their rage through hunting.

Ian’s laughter gradually faded as he turned his attention to the Nightshade Prince. Chris, focused on identifying the source of the lingering stench of blood, didn’t have any particular interest in this small talk, let alone have anything to snicker about.

   “I’m very intrigued to see what kind of game our ferocious warrior prince will bring us.” Ian taunted next, locking eyes with Prince Christopher. 

Chris sat upright, his expression impassive, though he raised an eyebrow in response.

   “I fought a bear once, back in Nightshade. Who knows what creatures I might encounter here on your Elysium soil?” He delivered the words with a laugh, but Ian’s gaze sharpened, sensing the subtle slight in Chris’ tone. 

With a final muttering of, “We’ll see,” from Prince Ian, an Elysium guard, who was the referee for this god-awful hunting sport, approached them. The game had officially begun. Each participant slung a pouch of arrows across their back, gripping their bows tightly in hand. 

At the sound of a horn, the noble and royal men dispersed, the atmosphere shifting from playful banter to a sudden seriousness. The competitiveness that had previously masked itself as a leisurely excursion, now surged to the forefront, each hunter focused on claiming victory in the hunt.

They were all prideful, a common personality trait amongst Elysium society it seemed.

Of course Chris couldn’t fall behind, glancing back at his personal guard, who sat stiffly in the distance, before nodding and urging his horse to pick up its pace.

As Prince Christopher disappeared into the greenery of tall trees, Han turned to Seungmin, who remained silent, his narrowed gaze fixed on the direction where his own prince had galloped off in. 

   “Aren’t you worried.” Han found himself asking, the earlier talk of ambushes and poison creeping into his thoughts, the lingering stench of blood still sharp in his nose.

Seungmin shot him a brief glance before returning his focus to the dense greenery of the forest. 

   “My prince is quite capable.” His words were curt, almost mumbled, but just loud enough for Han to catch, suddenly making him realize it was the first time he had heard Seungmin speak.

Han blinked, looking around at the Elysium knights, especially Ian’s head knight, who lingered at the edge of the forest marking the starting line. It was clear they took this game seriously. Even the guards were not allowed to intrude, as if there were no threats in these woods. But for Ian and his noble friends, who could barely handle a bow, it seemed safe. For the foreign princes, however, even the snap of a twig could pose a threat in this unfamiliar territory of the Grand Forest.

Deeper into the forest, there was a stillness, a quiet calm that enveloped the Warrior Prince, eyes wandering around at every rustle of bushes, of leaves underneath the gallop of horses.

   “Why are you following me?” Chris muttered, turning to spare a glance at Prince Hyunjin trailing behind.

The Sylvancrest Prince broke into a smile, speeding up to ride alongside him. 

   “I’m not very good at hunting animals.” He confessed, looking around.

Chris couldn’t help but let out a soft chuckle at his honest words, surprised that this man was the same one that played chess with him earlier that day. He had been slightly competitive back then, slightly something else. With a look in his eyes that was not present now. Instead looking at the Warrior Prince with a friendly, playful gaze.

   “I don’t think anyone here is as good at hunting as they claim to be.” Chris replied, exhaling in slight frustration as he recalled lord what’s-his-face asking which hand to pull the arrow with.

This time the Sylvancrest Prince laughed lightly, his eyes still wide with wonder at the lush foliage of the Grand Forest. 

   “Then maybe I’ll have a chance to easily catch a moose myself.”  He mused, still fascinated by a scenery he wouldn’t find back in Sylvancrest.

Chris didn’t respond, his attention focused on the trail ahead. He studied the path, still trying to pinpoint the source of the distant blood scent. His senses heightened, he remained alert, ready to fight if the situation demanded it.

   “Prince Ian seemed to be quite skilled, though. At least skilled enough to graze the second princess with his arrow.” Hyunjin said casually, but it was enough to make Chris pull the reins of his horse to a halt.

   “She seemed fine earlier. Did she have any complaints?—Is she in pain?” The Nightshade Prince’s words were laced with concern, his gaze betraying a hint of worry.

Hyunjin blinked, surprised by Chris’ reaction, before his brows relaxed. 

   “She didn’t mention any pain. I was just recalling her unusual behavior from last night.” He replied, referring to her stumbling in the dining hall corridors from the injured shoulder.

Except recalling last night, all Chris could think about was the chill of the night air as he snuck into her chambers. Her wide eyes filled with shock. Her lips trembling under his touch. 

Suddenly anger bubbled up inside him all over again, darkening his expression.

Hyunjin noticed the change, his eyes widening in confusion anew. 

   “Did something I say make you uncomfortable?” His voice cut through Chris’ thoughts, causing the Nightshade Prince to tighten his grip on the reins as he glanced at him.

Then there was this Eastern Sea prince, this man who was becoming increasingly annoying. His riddle-like conversations and air-headed demeanor, which Chris suspected was feigned, his constant hovering around the second princess, all began to grate on his nerves.

   “Focus on the game. I’m going to find my moose.” Chris muttered, a dark glint flashed in his eyes. 

With a spirited “yip!” Chris spurred his horse into a swift gallop, leaving the Sylvancrest prince behind, who watched the Nightshade Prince’s figure disappear into the greenery, a mix of suspicion and curiosity lingering in his expression.

Yet, only a few minutes later, Chris began to falter, his horse slowing to a stop. He sniffed the air, his narrowed gaze scanning the surroundings as the scent of blood grew stronger. It seemed he was getting closer to whatever had been slain, the heavy stench hitting him with increasing intensity.

Finally, as he approached a suspicious heap, his eyes took in the sight of the dead animal underneath the tall weeds and grass. 

The slain moose lie lifeless on the cold forest ground in a pool of its own blood. Multiple arrows were lodged in the body that Chris’ eyes flitted over, catching sight of the bright purple ribbons tied to their tails. The vibrant color stood out starkly against the greenery. Arrows that belonged to Prince Ian, marking his claim on the kill. 

Except Ian hadn’t shot a single arrow, let alone killed anything. 

He had been too busy gloating and boasting to his friends. How could he claim this kill when the hunt had just begun? Unless he had the skills of an archery master, or this moose had simply been waiting for him to arrive and take its life. Both scenarios were so ridiculous, Chris could laugh.

It was a clear conclusion to come to, a guess anyone could make in such a situation.

This moose was killed beforehand, to stage a grand win for the crown prince, who not only sucked at archery, but was perhaps one of the biggest losers Chris had met. 

Maybe he should laugh out loud.

But of course, he didn’t laugh. The approaching sound of hoofbeats forced him to hide, moving out of sight.

It was Prince Ian, the star of this show. He had entered the stage, knowing exactly where he should stand, where he would find the animal he supposedly killed. 

The Elysium Crown Prince dismounted, hands on his hips, staring down at the slain creature. He crouched to count his arrows, making a disgusted face as he did so, his chuckles echoing in the stillness of the forest before he stood. The sound made Chris’ expression harden, anger rising as he watched Ian gloat over the dead animal. Staring at Ian looking down at this dead animal. 

He suddenly recalled how Ian looked down at everyone he deemed beneath him, 

How he looked down on Y/N, his smug smile, villainous as he struck her with that arrow.  

Chris watched, his gaze intent. That of a ferocious beast.

A predator locking onto his prey.

A Nightshade Warrior staring at his moose.

Prince Christopher’s hands had moved on their own, as if he had no control over them. One hand gripped the bow, while the other pulled an arrow taut. And with a single exhale he let go, the arrow instantly released into the air, slicing the silence of the forest before the sharp thud of its impact resonated through the trees.

Prince Ian froze, his eyes widening as he stared at the arrow that had pierced the tree in front of him, just inches from where he stood. Staring at the arrow that shook to a still, the phantom sensation of its swift passage by his ear, still lingered on him. As he exhaled, his breath trembled, fear etched on his face as he grasped just how narrowly he had escaped a deadly strike.

Then his eyes darted to the ribbon tied on the end. The bright red color that had been assigned to the Nightshade Prince was vibrant against the tree. The sound of hooves approached, pulling him from his thoughts. His legs trembled slightly from the near-death experience as he turned to face Prince Christopher, looking up to his figure mounted on his dark horse. Chris still held his bow, staring down with a unreadable intensity at the stunned Elysium Prince. A slight smirk tugged at his lips, but he quickly lowered his head to mask his amusement.

The Warrior Prince finally let out a loud “tsk”, looking back up.

   “You are such a skilled archer indeed, Prince Ian. Striking that moose before I could even nock my arrow.” Chris’ lies flowed effortlessly through his lips as he gazed down at the shaken prince.

Except his made-up scenario only made Ian stiffen further, the color draining from his face. Before he could utter a response, before he could even accuse the foreign prince of anything, the group of the other lords approached, their expressions a mix of shock and disbelief as they took in the scene they stumbled upon.

The fallen moose. The countless arrows that stuck out of it. The single arrow lodged in the tree just behind their crown prince.

Their eyes flickered around, settling on the Nightshade Prince who was still mounted on his horse, awaiting for answers. Answers that easily left Chris’ lips, upturned into a gentle smile now.

   “Prince Ian’s aim is far superior to mine. How did he manage to hit this large fellow while my shot barely missed?” He glanced at the arrow embedded in the tree, an action mirrored by the young nobles.

Ian opened his mouth to respond, but no words came. Instead, he felt the weight of their stares, their cheers and praises echoing in his ears.

He remained silent. Acknowledging this made up scenario, perhaps even an act of an assassination that had been attempted. Yet, he couldn’t bring himself to speak out against it. 

His pride was too large. So, he thinned his lips into a smile, masking the turmoil within.

──────────────────────── 

Y/N stared at Anna, who had just returned from running errands in town. Areas which Y/N would have snuck out herself to find solace from the suffocating environment of the palace grounds, but couldn’t due to the personal knight that seemed to not leave her tail. Especially since her mother learned of the arrow incident, berating her knight for leaving her alone after the royal dinner the previous evening.

The older woman had entered her chambers with a fury unsurprising, yet she didn’t know if she should scold her daughter for being an idiotic fool for her bold actions the previous afternoon. Or if she should glance over her wound to ensure that she was alright.

Perhaps Lady Katherine’s motherly instincts had kicked in.

Or maybe it was the fear of losing her ticket to a golden life that kept her anger at bay.

Instead of reprimanding Y/N, she insisted her daughter stay confined to her chambers.

With Sienna summoned to the Queen’s court and no tasks to occupy the second princess, it was an easy arrangement. It was for her own apparent good, for her chance to recover. The mother had claimed, despite Y/N’s protests, that she felt fine, thanks to the Nightshade medicine tucked in the drawers of her dresser.

But alas, she was not allowed out unless summoned. Now, Y/N sat with a new concern as she observed her personal maid. Her mind had been clouded with Sienna’s sad gaze and the words exchanged during their earlier walk, but Anna’s entrance shifted her focus. The girl’s usual cheerful demeanor had darkened, replaced by a solemn expression, as if something weighed heavily on her mind. Y/N couldn’t help but wonder what had happened in town, given that Anna had been bubbly right until she left.

   “What bad news has come to you?” Y/N asked, her thoughts slipping out easily between them.

Anna, busy unwrapping various items she’d brought from town, blinked rapidly at her princess’s words before furrowing her brows. She glanced toward the grand bedroom doors, where Y/N’s personal knight stood watch.

   “You know you can speak freely in the privacy of my chambers. Worry not.” Y/N reassured her, easily reading the maid’s doubt.

Anna sighed, shaking her head as she settled into the open chair. 

   “It’s the usual. The townspeople are quite upset with the royal family for not addressing the ongoing Fading Ill sickness spreading in the slums. They’re afraid it might reach them and have been trying to urge the King’s court to take action.” Her mood had visibly soured from the whispers and murmurs she’d heard from merchants and shopkeepers.

Y/N fell into her own deep thoughts, recalling the illness Anna had mentioned. 

Fading Ill. 

The Second Princess had first heard about it in Melgarde, when she had snuck out of the estate and into the town square. There, people had openly discussed the sickness that seemed to emerge from nowhere. They blamed the harsh winters, the slum dwellers. The poor, who couldn’t care for themselves, spread the disease. After returning to the capital, she had stumbled upon the kitchen maids gossiping about the sickness and the royal court’s apathy, too preoccupied with preparations for celebrations while their citizens suffered.

Y/N pondered whether there was a way for her to help. She had even tried to gather information about the Fading Ill, but nothing useful had surfaced. Eventually, her responsibilities caught up with her, and the whispers of the sickness began to dwindle down as well.

She had assumed her father had taken action, but now, hearing Anna’s recounting of the news, Y/N couldn’t shake the feeling of guilt. Burdened by the weight of this situation. Responsibilities that weren’t hers to address, to solve.

   “My lady, it’s time for you to apply your medicine.” Anna said with a final sigh, as if resolving to let go of the troubling news from town.

Y/N nodded and as she began to undress, her eyes suddenly lit up. An idea making her stare with wide eyes of enthusiasm at Anna. The young girl who had already understood what that look meant, was quick to settle her back into her seat.

   “Let us apply this salve first. Else you will dash out and forget about your own wounds.” She pointed, rushed fingers already undoing the ties of Y/N’s dress before the princess decided it could wait.

The Second Princess begrudgingly agreed, allowing for the young maid to tend to her.

Her eyes started in fascination, peering down to look at her healing wound as best as she could. It truly felt like magic. The wounded area was no longer tender, now dry, and the skin looked significantly improved from what she remembered that morning. The Nightshade were indeed masters of the healing arts.

The Nightshade Kingdom held the exact solution this ambitious second princess had been searching for.

──────────────────────── 

Ian had been seething. In anger, in embarrassment, that coursed through him. The smug expression of that Nightshade Prince flashed before his eyes, a reminder of his humiliation in the forest. After downing an entire bottle of liquor, the intense rage still simmered within him, refusing to ease. He had stumbled into the royal library, unsure how he had even arrived there, but it was silent and dark, allowing him to stew in his fury.

The hour was late, and Ian struggled to recall what had transpired after winning the hunting game. An achievement that should have filled him with elation and pride. Instead, all he could think about was Prince Christopher. His lies, the arrow that had grazed past him, and the mockery hidden in that smirk. The victory felt hollow, overshadowed by the humiliation he couldn’t shake off.

The library doors creaked open, a sliver of light spilling in from the brightly-lit corridors outside, before the darkness reclaimed the space as the doors closed.

   “I knew I would find you holed up here.” The Queen’s voice pierced through Ian’s inner turmoil, her commanding tone shattering the stillness of the dimly lit library.

   “No one besides that stupid bastard-girl frequents this place.” He muttered, taking another swig from his bottle of liquor.

The Queen Mother inhaled sharply, her eyes darting around the seemingly empty library. His words were true. This wing of the royal library was primarily visited by the second princess and the occasional curious guest. Yet it was here that her son sought refuge in the late hours every now and then, drawn to the lightly guarded doors that allowed him to drink himself into a mess.

   “What is bothering you so that you’re drinking here like a fool?” The Queen’s words were curt, her narrowed eyes fixed on her son with a mix of annoyance and concern.

A bolt of thunder crashed outside, illuminating the library for a brief moment through the grand floor-to ceiling windows. The tumultuous weather seemed to mirror Ian’s emotions that had been bubbling within him all evening.

   “That Nightshade Prince.” He spat, his words dripping with venom.

It was clear something had happened. The Queen Mother had heard that Prince Ian had won today’s hunt, but his current state made it evident that the victory meant little to him.

   “He thinks he’s all high and mighty for being a warrior. And those stupid nobles look at him with admiration that they try to mask in my presence. I just know it.” The Crown Prince spat, taking another swig from his bottle.

The Queen only observed him, the sound of rain pattering against the windows echoed loudly in the tense atmosphere of the library.

It seemed that Prince Ian was feeling insecure, that much she could tell. 

But Ian’s thoughts drifted back to this afternoon in the Grand Forest. While he had to stage a win, the Warrior Prince had effortlessly shot an arrow at him. 

Missing him on purpose. 

Something he couldn’t even voice out loud from embarrassment. It made him even angrier. 

   “They supposedly hold disdain for him and his kind, yet behind my back, I’m sure they compare us. What comparison is there to make with a barbarian?” Ian’s eyes shot up to meet his mother’s grim expression.

   “Who dares to compare?” The Queen’s tone had hardened, yet there was no answer to the question he had asked.

Perhaps she thought her son was indeed less than the Nightshade Prince, true in many ways.

It wouldn’t be surprising.

The Warrior Prince was the perfect example of a future ruler. He spoke when it mattered, fit into any situation, and had sharp observational skills. His impressive defense mechanisms only highlighted what the Elysium Prince lacked.

Ian scoffed at her counter question, at her lack of an answer, dropping his gaze to the wood of the table he was slumped over. His expression darkened as he slowly glanced back up to meet the Queen Mother’s gaze.

   “Mother, when do we get rid of him.”

The Queen inhaled deeply, glancing around the room once again, before settling her gaze on her hunched over son. 

   “Soon. You need not worry. Focus on your upcoming marriage.” Her reply was cold, cutting through the heavy atmosphere.

Another jolt of thunder and lightning ricocheted through the room.

In the shadows at the back of the seemingly empty library, behind the large bookcases, Princess Y/N stood frozen, hands pressed against her lips to muffle any sound. Her downcast eyes widened as she stared at the tiles that glimmered under the flashes of thunder. Her face drained of color, mind reeling as whatever she overheard sank in.

The Second Princess had always been an expert at slipping away, and had done just that earlier in the evening.

Anna had warned her it wasn’t a good idea, that she should listen to her mother this one time and settle in for the night to allow her shoulder to recover. But, of course, the steadfast princess had decided she wanted to do some research. Perhaps she could uncover details about the Fading Ill sickness in the Nightshade texts housed in the royal library. Though the collection was limited, Y/N knew exactly where to find them, recalling the few times she had pulled them from the shelves.

Anna had sighed but reluctantly agreed to help with the escapade. She too had been worried about the spreading disease, especially after what she had heard out in town. Except they wondered how she would sneak out.

But it turned out to be an easy task.

The young maid peered out into the hall and caught a glimpse of the young knight standing rigid at his post. Upon closer inspection, she realized he had fallen asleep.

It made sense.

Ever since he was assigned to guard the second princess, who had no real threats posed against her, he had stood alone all night, often dozing off while keeping watch over a forgotten princess. Every night he had stood guarding against nothing. And he had quickly became comfortable. He had even perfected the art of sleeping on duty, appearing to stand guard.

If Anna had caught him any other time, she would have berated him for daring to look away from the princess. But tonight, she could only roll her eyes, feeling slightly grateful that he felt safe enough to neglect his duties and fall asleep.

That was how Y/N found herself sneaking into the library, a single handheld candlestick in her grip, glancing back every once and then as she cut through the rose garden to arrive without being seen. The library was easy to access, the palace knights stationed in this wing, mostly lingered by the King’s study, briefly passing by the part of the library only Y/N frequented. It was why she enjoyed coming here, able to scour books for hours without disturbance.

Once behind the large bookcases at the back, she began raking through the titles on the shelves, pulling out a few that might be helpful, settling on the ground as she flipped pages.

The loud creak of the library doors jolted her from her studious trance. She quickly scurried to her feet, instinctively blowing out the candle that provided her light. Pressing her back against the bookshelf, she held her breath, grateful for the shadows that concealed her.

Prince Ian’s voice broke the silence, laced with curses, followed by the sounds of chairs and stools being knocked about before he settled atop a table. The hidden princess strained to catch his mutterings, but couldn’t quite grasp them, only hearing more curses and the sloshing of liquor in a bottle.

She expected to remain hidden for as long as Ian lamented whatever had driven him to drink, to come in here. She planned to sneak out once he finished his cursing, either leaving swiftly after him or after he drank himself to sleep.

But she didn’t expect to overhear such vile plans. The words made her heart hammer against her chest, her throat going dry.

The thunder continued to roar in the night sky, its echo jolting the hidden princess out of her trance.

Now there she stood, concealed, processing everything she had overheard in that brief moment between Prince Ian and the Queen Mother. The implied words that made her heart race and her breath quicken.

There were some more murmurs and words exchanged between the Queen and the Crown Prince, but Y/N was too preoccupied with her own worries. The fear of getting caught and the weight of their insinuations clouded her mind.

   “You shall endure it, and entertain him for just a little longer.” The Queen’s final words came out with authority, words her son begrudgingly accepted.

Y/N stiffened as she heard more loud shuffling, her head shooting toward the edge of the bookcase to peek out of the shadows. She caught a glimpse of Prince Ian’s back as he followed the Queen Mother out, before the library doors closed with an echoing thud.

The silence that followed was eerie. Y/N found that she had been holding her breath and finally exhaled, leaning against the large bookcase to steady herself. Her heart raced, her ears rang from the tension, and tears welled in her eyes.

What did he mean by “get rid of him?” 

His tone, his words, replayed in her mind.

Her thoughts darted back and forth, trying to decipher Ian’s vague words.

Surely he meant to send the Warrior Prince back, to rid Elysium of his presence and urge him to return to Nightshade.

Princess Y/N’s heart tried to comfort her. But her mind, the sharper part of her, the part that was always thinking, always curious, understood the implications of that conversation between the two royals.

Get rid of him.

Breach the peace agreement. Perhaps start a war.

Assassinate the Nightshade Crown Prince.

Kill her Chan.

Y/N’s hands flew to her mouth again as the realization hit her, her heart pounding in the heavy silence. She held back a sob, gripping her dress for support as she leaned against the bookcase. Her eyes darted toward the large doors that had just closed, emerging slowly from the darkness. She was trying to figure out what to do with the shocking information she had uncovered.

She had come to the library seeking a solution to a different problem, but now her mind reeled with the new mess she found herself in. The justice-driven princess couldn’t allow the Elysium royals to assassinate Prince Christopher simply because Ian felt inferior.

Teary-eyed, she glanced around the now eerie library before her gaze settled outside, watching the rain pour against the glass. Each flash of lightning illuminated the darkened room.

Y/N inhaled deeply, bracing herself. She had made her decision.

She could let them kill the man she loved.

But she didn’t know what to do. Her mind raced, her heart pounded. Anxiety gripped her as she hurried out of the library, glancing over her shoulder in the now-darkened corridors.

The Second Princess inhaled, backtracking to hide behind a column, catching sight of a flickering fire ahead. It was a patrol guard, making his rounds of this area before he headed back to the second floor where the King’s study was. Sure there was no reason for her to hide, she was a Princess and he was a guard on duty. Yet what frightened her the most was the whispers of her presence here tonight reaching the Queen’s ears. Putting her in the library, the place where the royals had discussed about the Nightshade Prince openly.

Princess Y/N had never stayed out this late. She had never let herself become so engrossed in her books that she lost track of time. Especially on a night like this, with rain pattering loudly against the windows.

She gulped, waiting for the guard’s footsteps to fade into silence. When the corridor was quiet again, illuminated only by a few flickering wall sconces, she moved cautiously forward.

Perhaps she should have listened to Anna, or even her mother, as the young maid had urged her to do. It was a part of her nature that often led her into trouble. Yet as she stepped into the outdoor corridors, the heavy rain drumming in her ears, she convinced herself eavesdropping had been worth it.

The shortcut through the garden was treacherous, especially on dreary nights like tonight. The rain-soaked mud squelched beneath her feet as she navigated through the dark foliage. The shadows seemed to envelop her, the storm masking the sounds of her hasty movements.

The Second Princess thought she was safe, hidden from the patrol guards off the main path. But then, a sudden presence loomed behind her. A masked man pressed against her, one hand covering her mouth to stifle her scream, the other gripping her waist, pulling her close.

Y/N’s wide, fearful eyes locked onto his. Even in the darkness, in this unforgiving downpour, she recognized that piercing gaze.

Chan’s gaze bore into hers.

Eyes darting over her before narrowing, as he took a quick glance in the direction she emerged from, to ensure no one was on her trail. He pulled down the fabric that masked the lower half of his face.

   “Princess…” His voice carried a hint of frustration, mixed with an emotion she couldn’t quite place.

Realizing he still had her pressed against him, his hand resting on her back, he instinctively recoiled. Yet his eyes that held those unknown emotions stared down at her with a new intensity.

Y/N took in the sight of him, standing in the rain amidst the maze of tall bushes and shrubbery. Her eye raked over his all-black attire, the mask concealing his identity, soaked from head to toe. Suggesting he was out in the night with questionable intentions.

An enemy princess would have summoned the palace knights.

A capable princess would have accused him of treachery, questioning the Foreign Prince’s suspicious presence here, his motives.

A competent princess wouldn’t have been sneaking around in the first place.

Instead, Y/N’s face contorted, and she finally let out her cries that she tried her best to push back as she looked at him.

Looked at her childhood friend, the man she was enamored with.

The man whose life was in danger, a target of vile plans.

Chris’ eyes widened at her expression, at the tears streaming down her cheeks amidst her sobs. He watched as she pressed her hands over her eyes, shielding them from the rain. Confusion flickered in him for a moment, reaching out but instantly faltering. Her shivering form, her cries were enough to urge him to reach out, gripping her arms tightly.

   “Are you hurt? Did someone do something? Princess Y/N, tell me what happened!” He sounded frantic, eyes raking over her to ensure she wasn’t hurt, raking over her shoulder to check if the injury there left her in pain.

The Second Princess grasped the fabric of his shirt, pulling him closer into a hug that left the Warrior Prince stunned. He could feel his heart racing in his chest, and amidst the sound of rain pouring all around them, he was certain she could hear it too.

But it wasn’t just her hug that made his heart clench, it was the sight of her crying in his arms that filled him with a sudden sense of helplessness.

Chris pulled back slightly, enough to gaze down at her tear-streaked face, drenched by both rain and sorrow. His hands cupped her jaw, his touch gentle and tender. Like the soft touches from the night before, when he had brushed his fingers against her wounded flesh.

The Warrior Prince didn’t question his actions, gazing down at Y/N with the gentlest expression he had ever worn. A twinge of desperation stirred within him as he tried to figure out what had driven her to run through the rain in this dark, like a wild thing, now crying in his arms.

Y/N locked her eyes onto his, letting them drift over his features. His furrowed brows, his parted lips. Slowly, her expression softened as she took in his warmth. She calmed, breaking free from the anxious thoughts that had plagued her, all thanks to his presence and the comfort of his touch. His grip was both gentle and firm, her eyes raking over at the raindrops clinging to the ends of his hair, his chest rising and falling with each breath.

   “You must leave Prince Christopher.” Her whispered words were enough to break his worrisome silence, eyebrows relaxing as he took in the sight of her hardened expression staring up at him.

Here stood the Second Princess of Elysium, the steadfast and stubborn princess who always managed to irk him. The vulnerable girl he had glimpsed was gone.

And here she was telling him to leave, yet her hands gripped tightly at his shirt. Clinging to him, pulling him closer.

Prince Christopher felt something snap. Something not in the world around them, but rather something within himself, had finally come undone.

His fingers, still cradling her jaw, drew her face nearer, diving in to meet her in the middle. His lips finally pressing against hers.

It was a kiss that felt achingly real.

A kiss that Y/N found herself falling into with ease, her hands tugging at him with a hint of desperation, yearning to kiss him deeper, to pull him closer, flush against her.

Chris felt himself drowning in her as well. Her arms, her lips, the kiss that left him breathless. The Warrior Prince pulled back just enough to glance over her closed eyes, gaze scouring over her serene expression. Her lips let out a shaky breath and the enemy prince found himself leaning in for a second kiss.

The thunder roared loudly in the dark sky. Yet, even such a loud sound was not enough to bring them back to reality.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━ to be continued.

── ask to be tagged! - @stayceebs97, @palindrome969, @tsunderelino, @solzale, @fixation-dump, @ellelabelle, @gaslasyttune, @qwonyoung23, @minh0scat, @candyquokka, @sellomaybe, @kat-unzel, @gujter, @aeri-skzver, @hefflez8

[changbunnies]

Piece of a Puzzle (18+)

♡ Pairing: Duke’s Son!Seungmin x Princess!Reader

♡ Genre: royal au, fake dating, angst, fluff, love triangle, best friends to fake lovers to real lovers, so much pining from seungmin, slow burn-ish?, eventual smut

♡ Word Count: 20.4k (lmao it was not supposed to be this long...)

♡ Summary: For as long as Seungmin can remember, he’s been in love with you; and for as long as he can remember, you’ve been in love with Hyunjin. Desperate for Hyunjin to see you as a woman and no longer as a best friend or metaphorical sister, you ask Seungmin to pretend to be your boyfriend to make him jealous- you have nothing to lose, and nothing could go wrong! At least, that’s what you both think until your fake relationship with Seungmin begins to reveal feelings for you that he wanted to keep buried, and feelings in you that you didn't realize you had.

♡ Warnings: i know some people hate love triangles so if that is you then this fic is not for you i am sorry gsddgfd, i also wouldn't read this if you're not okay with characters who make mistakes and act selfishly lol, seungmin says mean things but it's all in the spirit of teasing and banter and he is not actually a mean person i promise, mentions of falling in freezing water, being sick + taking medicine, and reader makes 1 joke about killing seungmin.

♡ Smut Warnings (contains spoilers): virgin reader + virgin seungmin, loss of virginity, no intended d/s dynamics but reader is usually the one taking the lead lol, lots of kissing per usual, handjob, nipple play, unprotected piv, creampie

♡ Notes: it took me forever to come back to this series but the next member to get their royal au fic is seungmin <3 unlike my previous royal au fics, this one is in a modern setting which i hope makes for a fun dynamic and is a good change of pace from my other aus ! 

♡ Disclaimer: please read responsibly, and remember that this work is fiction and meant strictly for imaginative fun. the idols used in fics are more accurately faceclaims and personality outlines for imaginary characters, and should not be interpreted as factual representations of existing people.

If you were to ask Seungmin what his favorite thing about having two best friends was, it would've been how special it was to be a trio. You, Seungmin, Hyunjin– the three of you inseparable since you were babies, spending hours giving the attendants and guards watching over you trouble, getting into snowball fights in the winter and camping out in the gardens during the summer.

Countless days spent splashing around in the lakes and ponds near your estates and coming back with muddied feet, making messes in the kitchens when you disastrously tried to figure out how to bake a cake for your upcoming birthday, and giggling to each other even as your elders got red in the face from scolding you.

It was perfect, really– the happiest days of Seungmin's life, all spent in carefree bliss.. until you all started to get older. It was all so mindless when you were children; all Seungmin ever really comprehended back then was that you were all of similar age, and becoming friends was a natural and perfect arrangement thanks to your parents (who Seungmin realized were all important people, though he was too young at the time to understand why or how.) You, the princess in the east, Hyunjin, the prince in the west, and Seungmin, the duke's son born in the middle of both territories, whose father allied himself to both nations and was a revered peacekeeper.

He can still remember fondly the nights before it all became so different; when you'd have guard sanctioned sleepovers in the ballroom, how you'd run and splash in the rain, your laughter carrying even as the three of you became soaked and eventually scolded for dripping water onto the pristine castle floors. You'd slip out of royal events to go hangout together on the balconies, in the library, or anywhere really, as long as it wasn't full to the brim with your pretentious elders talking politics and future marriage.

But Seungmin made the mistake of falling in love with you, and you fell in love with Hyunjin, and that's where it all falls apart.

The situation is dramatic, you're dramatic– the way you whine and flail on the bed, claims of how you'll "just die" if Hyunjin doesn't finally realize you're the woman of his dreams. Seungmin sits across from you on your chaise near the balcony of your extravagant bedroom, trying not to react too strongly one way or the other. As the only person you can confide in on this topic, Seungmin is used to hearing you pour your heart out to him about Hyunjin.

He likes to think he's used to it, anyways; that it doesn't hurt anymore because he simply doesn't let it, but any outsider looking in would be able to tell that isn't true. His smile falters, his bright eyes dull, his heart sinks to the pit of his stomach– because you will never love him with the same intensity you love Hyunjin. But it's been this way for years now; you are hopelessly in love with the prince of the neighboring country, while Seungmin is tragically in love with you. He really should just get over it already.

You've gone on and on and on about how Hyunjin is the ideal man– beautiful, educated, kind, dependable, artistic; everything Seungmin feels he cannot compare to. It's so pathetic, he feels pathetic; he never even put much thought on being of equal standing to the two of you until you started confiding in him about your feelings for Hyunjin, pouring out your heart and simultaneously breaking his with each new admission. Seungmin himself didn't even realize how in love with you he was until he was firmly faced with rejection; and it's almost funny how he's rejected before he can even try.

"I just want him to like, finally see me as a woman, y'know? I'm not the little girl you guys grew up with anymore!" you wail before shoving your face into one of your many pillows, huffing and whining in frustration as you kick your feet up and down. Apparently, you have come to find out that Hyunjin still views you as more of a sister than a potential lover, and you've spent the entire afternoon whining as you try to think of what else you can possibly do to make Hyunjin see you differently.

Seungmin wishes he could do the same– make you see him differently, as someone other than the best friend, almost brotherly figure you grew up with. But it's not meant to be, and Hyunjin has already won the race for your affection without even realizing he was part of it. "Stop being so dramatic," Seungmin complains half-heartedly, hoping you think his deadpan tone comes from just being mildly annoyed and not in fact utterly heartbroken.

You lift your head from the pillows and glare at him, but he just rolls his eyes before he lets his own head fall back against the cushion of the chaise, staring up at your impossibly pristine ceiling. "But we're a perfect match! He's a prince, I'm a princess, and I love him!" you whine, throwing one of your pillows at Seungmin when all he does is scoff instead of console you.

He throws the pillow back at you without even turning his head in your direction, and you throw it back harder than you did before, making him finally turn his gaze back in your direction. "Will you stop? Crybaby," Seungmin says, hoping to shift the conversation back to something that doesn't tear his heart to shreds. "Maybe he'd like you more if you weren't such a brat when you don't get your way."

"Seungmin!" your frown grows as you cross your arms, "do you have to be so mean to me when I'm literally heartbroken?" He has a point, that's true enough– you are acting a bit like a spoiled brat right now. But he could at least wait until later to call you out on it! You don't understand why he's always so mean when it comes to your feelings about Hyunjin. It's his personality to tease and be playfully mean in his banter, but when your feelings for your other best friend are the topic it never feels like it's purely in jest.

"Look, I get that he and his family are starting to consider who he'll marry, but it's not like he's actually seeing anyone yet. I'm sure you still have time," Seungmin suggests after a frustrated sigh, and you huff, falling back to the pillows and staring up at your ceiling with yet another dramatic sigh. "Maybe you just don't get it because you've never been in love. The thought of losing him to someone else is.. painful.."

It's a moment of real vulnerability at the end, the pain and fear in your voice when the last words leave your lips evident. If only you knew he does understand all too well, faced with the very same reality every single day. You deal with your pain by complaining to Seungmin in overdramatic displays, while he bottles it all up and shoves it as deep inside his heart as it can go, hoping that he won't have to acknowledge the pain again until he's alone, in the safety of his bedroom where no one can see or hear him agonize over his unrequited love.

But like Seungmin said, there's still time.. Hyunjin and his family are looking over marriage prospects together, but at the end of the day the choice is entirely Hyunjin's, and surely there's something you can do before he starts going on dates and falls in love with someone else. You shoot up quickly, the apparent clarity zapping you with an idea. "You're a genius, Minnie! I don't have to wait for him to return my feelings at all, I can do something!"

"Uh... you're welcome..?" Seungmin sits back up and looks over at you, and he instantly regrets it. You're looking at him with puppy dog eyes, lip pouty and hands clamped together in what is clearly a plea for help. He's not even sure he wants to know what you're thinking of roping him into– whatever plan it is you're crafting, nothing good can come from it. Especially not when your plot is being conjured by pure emotional need.

"Seungmin.. Be my boyfriend, please! Help me make him jealous," you plea and his eyes instantly widen, mouth hanging open in complete shock. He and Hyunjin have had to talk you out of a lot of irrational acts during their time as your friend, but this takes the fucking cake. There's no way you are asking him to do this. "You can't be serious," he says after the initial shock passes and now you scramble to the edge of the bed, pout growing as you try to convince him.

"Seungmin, please–" "Absolutely not, no," he cuts you off and the desperate, heartbroken look he's met with shatters the already microscopic pieces of his heart into even smaller pieces– a feat he didn't even think possible. It's almost impressive how you manage to break his heart without even realizing it.

"Please, you know there's no one else I can ask," you plea, now completely off the bed and just inches in front of him, clasping his hands in yours. There it is– Seungmin, the consolation prize. Seungmin, the one you turn to simply because Hyunjin isn't available. Seungmin, who gets dragged into schemes like this because he just can't live with himself if he knows you're genuinely upset.

Your puppy eyes looking at him so pleadingly paired with your soft hands desperately clutching his is enough to make him melt. He swallows, averting his gaze from your pouting lips and glassy eyes, trying to stay firm in his sentiment. "It's a bad idea," he says, voice short and impossibly tense, "what will you do if it doesn't work? If he's just like.. a good friend, and supports us being happy together?"

"But what if he doesn't? C'mon Minnie, we at least have to try!" you push on, your hands squeezing his tighter. The fact that his statement doesn't seem to deter you at all somehow makes the pain in his chest even worse. Like there's no reality in which Seungmin is the viable love interest for you, like the possibility that Hyunjin would concede your heart to him couldn't ever be reality, like the idea isn't even worth entertaining.

"I.." He hesitates as he finally looks at you again, your face still impossibly close to his, the earnest desperation for him to help you with this stupid idea making his chest feel impossibly tight. Seungmin likes to think he's good at pretending to not have feelings for you, but he doesn't think he can do it while also pretending to be your boyfriend.

How is he supposed to be so close to you and pretend it was all empty acts and words when the night is over? He'll tell you he loves you and you'll think it's part of the act, praise him for being so committed to the bit for your sake, thank him for pretending so effectively. You'll take his heart in your hands and twist and bleed and crush it, and you won't even know you're doing it. "Please?" you try once more and his resolve utterly crumbles.

It's stupid how much power you have over him. It's stupid how he can't stand firm against what is very clearly a disastrous idea. It's stupid how he's going to willingly allow his heart to be trampled upon just to make you happy. "..Fine," Seungmin finally breathes out his answer, conceding without all that much of a fight in the end.

You happily squeal and wrap your arms around him in a tight hug, thanking him over and over again. And despite himself, Seungmin smiles– because even though he's going to suffer, at least you'll be happy because of him, even if it's only for a short while. "You're the best, Minnie! I love you!" you beam, eyes crinkling with pure joy that he's going to help you.

"Yeah, yeah, you're welcome," he says as he wraps his arms around you in return. It's a mistake, but if it's for you then isn't it a mistake worth making? And he has to ignore the way his heart skipped a beat when you told him you loved him, has to remind himself that you'll never mean it in the way he wants you to, that every show of affection from this point onward will all be part of an elaborate performance.

The first rule of every fake relationship: set expectations and make a plan.

That's exactly why Seungmin finds himself visiting your room again following his foolish promise to be your pretend boyfriend. You bounce up to him in delight when he enters your room following a knock on the door, and he wishes that your excitement was genuinely for him, and not because you were going to be using him to make your shared best friend jealous.

Seungmin doesn't even believe Hyunjin will be jealous in the first place; he's never expressed having a romantic interest in you, and he thinks Hyunjin would confide in him if he did. But then again, it's not like Seungmin has ever confessed his feelings over you to Hyunjin either.. And the possibility that Hyunjin does love you, but simply never brought it up in the same way that Seungmin hasn't fills him with dread.

If this stupid plan works, and Seungmin actually helps you two come together.. he wants to think he'll be happy for you two, but who is he kidding? He'll be fucking gutted. "You look handsome today, boyfriend," you tell Seungmin happily, and he immediately freezes in place, hoping his expression is more incredulous than it is embarrassingly flushed red. What a way to be ripped out of his spiraling thoughts.

"Can you warn me next time you're about to say something stupid?" Seungmin tries to play it off as he takes his usual place on your chaise. "Sorry, just practicing," you follow up with a giggle, and he simply sighs as he watches you sit next to him. He's really gotten himself into trouble this time around, but it's too late to rescind his agreement to help your cause.

"I don't think most couples literally call each other 'boyfriend' and 'girlfriend' to their faces," Seungmin says, trying to smoothly ignore the 'handsome' part of your comment. It's superficial, you don't mean it, he already knows that; best not to let his mind dwell on a false hope of you one day meaning those words. "Well duh, I already know that," you say as you roll your eyes, "I'm just getting into character!"

Ouch. You have to get into character to love him, huh? It's not like he's surprised to hear it, but it hurts all the same. "Can't be too sure with you, sheltered princess and all," he teases and you roll your eyes again. "I'm not that sheltered. And tv exists! I'll have you know romance is my favorite genre."

"Great, so you get all your knowledge on romance from tv? How promising," Seungmin continues and you shove him, though all he does in response is smile at you. "Whatever, it's not like you know what you're doing either. You've never even had a girlfriend," you say and for a moment you think Seungmin is going to shove you back, but he doesn't.

His hands rise and almost touch you, but he hesitates before ultimately lowering them back down to his lap. It's been that way since you started getting older, as if the days you'd play wrestle or sleep while hunched together or hold hands while skipping through the castle never happened. Thinking about it, he stopped doing things like that around the same time you brought up your feelings for Hyunjin.

You assume he was being considerate, trying to be hands off so Hyunjin didn't get the wrong idea, but.. You wonder why you didn't realize how much he's been keeping his distance from you and hesitating to touch you until now? (And in reality, he stopped touching you when he realized he had feelings for you, and not when you admitted you like Hyunjin, but he's never going to clarify that fact to you.)

The other day, when you clutched his hands in yours in a desperate plea, it was the first time you held hands since you were kids. That's a sad thought, for some reason.. Maybe part of you missed it more than you realized. Taking his hand in yours, you really allow yourself to experience it this time.

It's nostalgic, holding his hand; though Seungmin's hands are much bigger now than when you were kids, they feel the same. Warm, comforting, gentle. You wonder when the last time you did this was; you almost feel bad that you can't remember. You were once holding hands every single day and then you just.. stopped. You're not sure why the thought makes you as sad as it does; probably just the natural melancholy that comes with nostalgia, if you had to guess.

Seungmin awkwardly accepts your hold, looking at you curiously after he stops fidgeting his hand. "I kinda missed this," you admit, cheeks growing pink with the admission. You're not sure why saying it makes you blush– it's just Seungmin. "Me too," he responds, his own face equally as pink, though he hopes you don't notice. He looks down at your hands, fingers laced together, and his heart stirs.

Ignoring it, he looks back to you, expression nervous but entirely serious. "So uh– your plan.. what exactly is it?" he asks, surprised when you answer immediately. Guess you put a lot of thought into it; because while your answer isn't rehearsed necessarily, it is confident. "Well, you got your invitation to the ball right? That's where we'll tell Hyunjin we're dating! It's the perfect setting."

"But you literally hate going to that thing– are we really going to go just for that?" The annual Hwang family ball is much more politics than it is dancing. Seungmin can't think of a single time you all attended and actually had fun without having to sneak away or cause a scene. At best it's boring and at worst you're spending the entire night being lectured on the future of your countries and how important it is to marry the right person for political power.

"Yeah, unless you have a better idea?" you frown as you look at Seungmin. He doesn't, unfortunately. He's not even sure he'd suggest it if he did have one, to be fair. God, this is so stupid– he's stupid for agreeing to go along with this. Curse you and your ability to rope him into the worst things possible just by giving him a cute look.

And in the end, he easily accepts the plan– attend the ball, act like a lovey dovey couple, activate Hyunjin's underlying jealousy (that may not actually exist), and hopefully profit. In the meantime, you'll be "building credibility" by getting past all the awkwardness now, so that you can pass as a legit couple in front of Hyunjin when the time comes.

"You're really okay with this, right? It's okay to change your mind," you say with a compassionate squeeze to his hand. It takes Seungmin by surprise that you're actually considering his feelings– not to insinuate that you're entirely selfish or don't care about him, but you do tend to have a one track mind when it comes to your romantic feelings for Hyunjin.

You watch him carefully, his expression entirely unreadable to you. You wish you could tell what he was thinking in times like this, but he always becomes a stonewall when you bring up romance and your long harbored feelings. You know it must be for a reason, but he never tells you what it is, and you can only assume the topic of love makes him uncomfortable; and while you're grateful for his help, you don't want him to push through discomfort just for your sake.

"..Yeah, I'm good. This is fine, everything's fine," he finally says. You don't entirely believe him, but you don't press him on it– he'll just argue with you if you don't take his word for it. Stupid. You were clearly offering him an out and he just accepted his role as your emotional martyr. But who is he kidding– it's not like he would've been able to answer any differently, ever a slave to your whims.

Whether you realize it or not, you have him in the palm of your hands, and Seungmin would do anything to make you happy– even at the detriment to himself. "So.. uh, do you want to kiss me?" you transition and Seungmin has to make a conscious effort to not choke on his own spit. Because how are you asking him that so casually?

"No, you're gross," he answers; a lie, obviously, but he didn't realize this fake relationship would entail anything other than mild displays of affection and maybe the use of petnames. If he kisses you, it's over for him. Completely, utterly over– he'll never be able to pretend you're just his friend ever again.

You roll your eyes as you let go of his hand, and he frowns; he misses the warmth already, but what right does he have? "You can just say no without the 'gross' comment, asshole," you shove him again. Seungmin is always mean to you, so it's not like you weren't expecting a comment like that when you decided to bring up kissing. You might've hoped for a different reaction, but you certainly weren't expecting anything profound or romantic.

...Why were you hoping for a different reaction in the first place?

"No, that's– I'm sorry, that's not what I meant, I just–" You blink at him, surprised to see him floundering to admit you're not actually gross to him; it's almost endearing how Seungmin fumbles with his words. Poor Seungmin– being mean to you is his only defense mechanism and now it's going to bite him in the ass. No wonder you don't have feelings for him.

In reality, he thinks you're pretty. So fucking pretty. And he wants to kiss you more than he's ever wanted anything. "Force of habit," he finally says, swallowing down his true thoughts and feelings, as usual. Thankfully, you accept his answer easily; he's not sure whether you truly believe him or not, but he'll take what he can get. "Have you ever kissed someone?" you decide to ask, moving swiftly along after taking his answer at face value. Thank God.

"Once," he answers, and oh, that's a surprise; you expected him to say 'no,' to be like you– with zero experience. You're best friends– why hasn't he told you..? To be fair, it's not that Seungmin kissed someone– he was the one being kissed by someone else. The distinction is very important! And he can see the question lingering before you even ask it, so he takes the initiative in answering. "It was awkward. I didn't.. feel the same way as them."

"Oh. I didn't realize there are people that like you," you say and Seungmin instantly shoots you with an incredulous look. "Ouch," he deadpans.

"No, sorry– I didn't mean for that to sound so mean, I swear," you promise with an awkward laugh. At least now you're equal on the 'making unintentionally hurtful comments' front.

You've thought at great length what it would be like if Hyunjin started dating someone, but you're just now realizing you never put any thought into Seungmin dating someone. You guess you just always expected that he'd be there; you never stopped to think about what would happen if he wasn't, never even considered it a possibility that he wouldn't always be right there next to you.

And it would happen eventually, wouldn't it? And what about when you and Hyunjin are a couple; you two will have each other and Seungmin will.. well, you don't know what he'll do. But you don't like the thought of him being anymore distant. What a way to realize how selfish you're being.

“Sucks that it was awkward,” you eventually say, ignoring the way guilt starts to eat at you. No surprise that the selfish princess doesn’t want to confront that issue just yet.

“Yeah.. honestly, I felt bad. I’m sure it took a lot of courage to confess and kiss me, but I,” already had feelings for you, he thinks, but obviously opts to say something else, “just didn’t feel the same.”

Lord knows Seungmin will never have that same level of courage; to put yourself out there and confess only to be met firmly with rejection is terrifying. And he knows you don’t feel the same, so why even try? Being a coward suits him perfectly fine in this case. 

“Why didn’t you accept anyways? You might’ve returned the feelings after becoming a couple and growing closer to them,” you ask, earnestly curious. You think you would give someone a chance if they confessed to you if you weren’t already so in love with Hyunjin.

But as far as you knew, Seungmin didn’t have feelings for anyone, so there would’ve been nothing to lose from trying. If only that were true– his life would be much easier if he wasn’t earth shatteringly in love with you. 

“Mm, maybe. But if months went by and I still didn’t, I would’ve felt scummy. Like I was stringing them along and giving them a false promise, y’know? And I don’t wanna be that guy,” Seungmin answers, keeping out the major detail of ‘I’m also impossibly in love with you and dating someone while being in love with your best friend is definitely frowned upon.’

“Wow. I think I respect you more after that,” you say and Seungmin scoffs, unable to hide the smile that breaks on his lips. “Gee, thanks. Glad to know you didn’t respect me before now.”

“Hey, I clearly said ‘respect you more!’ Meaning I did respect you, thank you very much,” you laugh. There’s a silence that follows when the giggling dies down and the smiles fade, with Seungmin looking at you carefully. Right. He’s here to be your fake boyfriend. Better get back to the quest at hand.

“So.. I’m not actually gross, huh?” you ask, bringing the conversation back to where it began. “Only a little,” he teases, laughing when you grab a spare cushion to shove at him. 

“Stop being mean, I’m trying to be serious!” You whine as he tosses the cushion you shoved in his face to the floor. “Okay, okay,” Seungmin says, his expression softening as he looks at you. In reality, he thinks you’re perfect; but it’s much easier to tease and pretend you disgust him than to face how beautiful he thinks you are. But with how seriously you’re taking this entire thing, it seems he’s going to have to be more earnest with himself, and you, than he was prepared to be.

He really fucked himself over this time around.

"Theoretically.." you start, chewing on your lip before you continue, "Hypothetically–" "Those words mean the same thing," Seungmin can't help but interrupt, laughing as you shove him and tell him to 'shut the fuck up.' You hate him sometimes– fucking menace to your sanity, you swear.

"Hypothetically," you continue when he's done laughing and you're sure he's ready to take you seriously, "assuming you're being honest and I'm not gross. Would you want to kiss me?"

Well. Guess there's no avoiding it now. It's time for the thing Seungmin fears most– some good, old fashioned honesty about his feelings. "Yes," is all he says; no further elaboration, no talk on whether or not this is still strictly in the realm of hypotheticals, or if he'd only be okay with it under some sort of condition being met. Just.. yes, he'd want to kiss you– wants to kiss you. That's it.

You can’t believe how easily he conceded in the end; you wonder if another mean, teasing joke is inbound, or if he doesn’t quite get what you’re insinuating. "You know I mean on the lips right? Like.. an actual kiss?" You ask, wanting to ensure you're on the same page and he's not just thinking, like.. forehead or cheek kisses or something. All of which will still be part of this fake relationship, but still; better to make sure everything is clarified.

"Yeah, I assumed that," he replies and you simply blink. You're not sure why, but that does something to your heart. "And.. you're okay with that..?"

"Yeah..? I thought we established I didn't mean it when I said you're gross. I was just teasing," he says plainly, as if the topic you're discussing is completely normal. Well, maybe that's the attitude you should have too– it's no big deal, right?

It's not that strange for two best friends to kiss, it happens all the time! And this was all your idea in the first place; you don't even understand why you feel so weird about it all of the sudden. Sure, not thinking you're gross and wanting to kiss you are two different things entirely, but you're thinking about it too hard.

Seungmin is just being a good friend to you. He's nonchalant about it because all of this is simple; it's supposed to be simple. Just one friend casually helping out another. If anything, it's a relief he has no hang ups about it, right? It makes this whole thing easier! (The reality: he is not nonchalant. He is practically screaming inside over the idea of kissing you– you just don't know it.)

Blushing and heart twisting for reasons beyond your understanding, you opt to just take his hand in yours again instead, averting your eyes from him and training them off to the distance. Your bedroom walls are very interesting all of a sudden.

"Maybe later," you mumble and he nods, relieved as he squeezes your hand. Yeah, maybe later. He doesn't think he's ready to fall for you even harder just yet anyways.

Weeks pass, and your fake relationship develops slowly but organically thanks to the Hwang's ball being further away still. You expected becoming "natural" in your relationship would take time, which is why you wanted to get a headstart on practicing being close. Your heart still stirs in unexpected moments, but mostly you feel comfortable, which is perfect.

Some awkwardness and shy closeness would be natural, but you can't appear stiff in front of Hyunjin if you want to pass as a genuine couple– the goal is for the relationship to look fresh, not forced. Due to this, you and Seungmin hold hands a lot these days. You like it, to be honest. It reminds you of all these thoughts and memories you hadn't lingered on in years. Of play dates and toothless smiles and laughing as you trip and tumble and grow dirty. You missed it.

You missed this too– cuddling, same as the hand holding. It's something you hadn't done since you were kids, and similarly, you couldn't remember the last time you had done it before now. You find yourself thinking it's a shame you ever stopped.

You're currently laying against him, head on his shoulder while one of his arms is wrapped around your waist, legs tangled together on your obscenely large sofa while some movie you long since stopped paying attention to plays on your equally large tv.

You practiced calling each other petnames, but they all felt weird– in the end, the only thing that felt natural was sticking to calling each other stupid, idiot, asshole, brat.. And somehow hearing Seungmin call you a selfish brat before he hugs you with a smile makes your heart skip a beat these days. It doesn't make sense, but you don't let yourself dwell on it or think about it too hard– this is all for a purpose, and it's better to just leave it at that.

When you suggested trying out cuddling today, you didn’t expect your mind to go to so many complicated places. "Hey Minnie, do you remember the last time we cuddled like this?" you decide to ask him, tilting your head up to be able to catch a glimpse at him. "Yeah. We were 12," he answers easily, and you can just barely see this corner of his mouth lifted in a fond smile.

"Really?" you question and he tilts his head to look at you. He answered so quickly; no delay in the slightest, didn't even have to waste any time thinking on it or trying to remember– he just.. already knew. The instantaneous ease in which he responded surprises you as equally as it fills you with guilt.

"Of course. You don't remember?" he asks and the pangs of guilt over not being able to remember yourself grow painfully. You never expected to feel so terrible over something so small. "Not really.." you answer with a frown; you wish you did, especially since Seungmin seems to have his own memory of your childhood closeness perfectly intact, but you simply.. don't remember.

"Gosh, I'm so hurt. You care for me so little," Seungmin teases, but all you can do is continue to frown. You can't bring yourself to hit him with a witty quip or joke that you hate him– because part of you worries that how inattentive you've been thus far would give rise to him one day believing your statements made to poke fun are how you truly feel. And right now you just honestly, truly feel bad.

His expression softens when he realizes you're genuinely saddened, assuming it's because he took the teasing too far by insinuating you don't care about him. In reality, it's not him you're upset with, but yourself. And it stings to realize that maybe what he says isn't completely wrong– maybe you really have cared about him too little.

Maybe if you weren't so hyperfocused on love and romance with Hyunjin, you'd have realized sooner how much you put your friendship with Seungmin on the wayside. You wish you'd been a better friend. "It's to be expected actually,” Seungmin attempts to rectify his mistake in wording (though truly it's not his fault or a ‘mistake’– your guilt is your own, and all he did was unintentionally spark some much needed self reflection.) “You were sick as fuck and loaded on cough syrup."

"Oh!" You exclaim suddenly, a vague memory in the very back of your mind becoming clearer now. Just as Seungmin said, you were 12 and suffering from the worst cold you'd ever had in your entire life. You felt like you were dying and it was your own fault it happened; a blizzard had just passed, and you insisted on playing in the freshly fallen heaps of snow with your two best friends.

The lake near the castle had completely frozen over in the storm, and despite being repeatedly warned how unsafe it is to play on a frozen lake, you were just a kid who thought you were invincible. Every kid is overconfident and zealous, truly believing no harm or wrong can come to them until the world teaches them a lesson in humility– and that's exactly what happened that day.

You skated around on the frozen lake, paying no heed to any of the warnings you received, laughing and giggling without a care in the world even as you slipped and slid around on the slick surface of the ice. But eventually you fell, of course you did, it was ice– and the moment your weight collided with the surface of the lake, it cracked.

It's hard to remember what followed– all you really remember was how your whole body froze the minute it touched the icy water, as if all your limbs had become pure lead. But Seungmin was there, and Hyunjin too, and they pulled you out and got you back inside as fast as they were able. It honestly came as no surprise that you got sick following your unceremonious ice bath.

Seungmin and Hyunjin got a bit sick too, but their sniffles and slight coughs paled in comparison to your symptoms. Hyunjin's parents made him return home to shake off his cold, but Seungmin's didn't mind if he got over his slight cold with you in the castle. Even with the spark of clarity it's all still vague, but you can just remember it now– how Seungmin was glued to your side the entire rest of the week as your body tried to fight off the illness.

He was there when your attendants woke you to take your medicine, he was there when you drank your water and sipped your soup, he rubbed your back when you coughed and stroked your head when you complained that it hurt. He was.. sweet. The entire time. The usual Seungmin who teased and complained was nowhere to be seen, even when you unintentionally got snot on his shirt.

Instead, he was just sincerely caring. And he cuddled you, let you soak up all his warmth because no matter how many layers of blankets you were under and despite the constant fueling of the fire in your fireplace, you still felt so impossibly cold. "I remember now," you tell him and the smile you're met with stirs something within you.

Or maybe it's the memory of how sweet he can be when he's not being a jackass. Maybe it's how underneath his layers of teasing comments and sarcastic words, he's genuine. He remembers things, always remembers things, even when the moments are small and fleeting. And maybe it's how even when he complains or calls you a selfish brat, he'd still do anything for you.

Even now, years later, he's still just the same in that regard. Cares about you, would do anything for you, wants you happy even when your happiness causes him trouble and inconvenience. All his sarcasm and jokes at your expense will fade the minute you're genuinely unwell, he'll drop everything he's doing the minute you need him for something serious, because underneath his layers and walls, he'll always be someone selfless and kind.

You sit up ever so slightly, just enough to get a clearer view of him while still tangled in his arms and legs. You breathe his name in a whisper, and his eyes dart around your face as he tries to figure out what you’re doing, what you’re thinking while looking at him so.. attentively. It makes him nervous when you look at him like that, makes him feel like you can see right through him and read his every thought, like he’s nothing but cellophane.

And you kiss him. You kiss him. Soft and chaste, your lips just barely pressed to his, but still he crumbles, his sandcastle heart caught by your wave. His weak heart pounds, his blood races through his veins, he blinks in surprise and still can't seem to find himself or formulate a thought even when you pull away. What even just happened?

"S-Sorry," you flush instantly as you turn your eyes away from Seungmin's heating face. You can't believe you just kissed your best friend like that. And like.. you fully expected to give Seungmin your first kiss as part of this whole charade, but it was supposed to be a moment that only happened after meticulous planning and mental preparation. This was undeniably, purely the heat of the moment.

"Uh, I– it just.. felt right. For practice..?" you stumble as you try to formulate an excuse for your own unexpected actions. Yeah. It was for practice, that's all. You aren't in love with him– you love Hyunjin. What you felt when you kissed him just now was.. something else. That's what you tell yourself, because it's the only thing that makes sense.

"Oh, right. Yeah, that makes sense," Seungmin utters quietly, sounding almost.. disappointed. You look at him again, and catch just a glimpse of sadness in his eyes before it fades completely, almost as if it was never there. And maybe it wasn't– maybe you're projecting, somehow? Do you want Seungmin to be sad that the kiss doesn't mean more?

You don't know. It's confusing. And you hate that you don't know why it's confusing, that you don't understand where all these conflicting thoughts and feelings are coming from and what they mean. You don't want to admit it, but maybe he was right; maybe this whole thing wasn't a good idea.

He sees the struggle on your face, but there's no way for him to know that it's due to confusion about your feelings, how you liked kissing him and how you don't know what that says about you or about your feelings– for him, or for Hyunjin. Instead, he worries that you hated it, that kissing him filled you with disgust and regret and now you were trying to figure out how you can ever look at him again.

But you do look at him again, of course you do. And despite the confusion and the struggle from your complex, raging emotions, you meet his eyes softly. You reach for a hand and squeeze, and once again he feels like you see right through him, see all the ugly dread and guilt and sorrow that comes from being in love with you. You see him and he sees you, and though it's confusing, and clearly disastrous, neither of you want to let it go just yet.

"Do you.. want to keep practicing..?" he asks hesitantly, a hint of hope in his unsteady voice. A hope he shouldn't have, a hope he feels you will sternly reject. But you don't. You smile at him, a timid one he thought only ever reserved for Hyunjin, and you nod. "Yeah, do you?" you ask, and all Seungmin replies with is a simple "yeah" of his own before your lips are on his again.

You kiss him and he kisses you, and sometimes it's awkward as you bump noses or ever so slightly miss and instead kiss the corner of his mouth, but in the end it all becomes natural, rhythmic, easy. Butterflies thrash in your stomach, your heart races, your face burns, his lips are soft and warm and perfect, and through it all, for the first time in all your years, you stop thinking about Hyunjin, and linger exclusively on Seungmin.

Kissing Seungmin makes you feel strange. It doesn't feel bad, nor wrong, or uncomfortable; but strange because of what it evokes in you. When he left for his guest room that night, and you had more time to think about what you’d done, you came to the conclusion that the butterflies would pass now that it was over. That you only felt them because kissing, regardless of it being with your best friend, was foreign and new. You thought that as you got used to kissing him, that deceitful fluttering in your stomach would gradually fade.

You expected that kissing him would become as second nature to you as holding hands, and eventually you’d feel.. maybe not nothing when kissing him, but certainly you wouldn't still be reactive. What has actually happened is rather the opposite; your heart skips a beat when he enters your room now, you unconsciously flush whenever he holds you closer, your stomach knots itself when he smiles following a kiss. 

He smiles a lot more these days; or maybe you only perceive it that way because part of you wants it to mean something more than it does. That’s what frustrates you most of all; no matter how much you tell yourself it’s just practice, that this means nothing to either of you and is only a means to an end, you find yourself struggling to come to peace with that idea. Confusion and guilt eat at you, complex feelings and emotions you didn’t even know you had rising to the surface one after the next, protesting being ignored and making themselves acutely known. 

There’s a question that burns in the back of your mind, something you’re scared to confront but know you must before this is over– is your love for Hyunjin genuine or superficial? Do you love him the way a lover truly would, or do you love the idea of being with him? The idea that your romance would be a picture perfect fairytale, because he’s a prince and you’re a princess and those two things just naturally go together.

Perhaps your understanding of love is inherently naive and flawed; perhaps all these years spent pining, you were chasing an ideal rather than a person. But misguided though it may be, your love for Hyunjin has to be true; because apart from being one of your best friends, he’s objectively perfect for you.

Seungmin is rough and jagged, while Hyunjin is polished and smooth. Though more tempered and refined than yourself, Hyunjin matches your flair for the dramatic, while Seungmin is oppositely rooted firmly in reality. Where Hyunjin is elegant words and gentle smiles, Seungmin is sarcasm and rolled eyes.

But that’s not entirely true, you know it isn’t; because while Seungmin is indeed sarcastic and mean and sometimes rough around the edges, he’s also gentle and sincere and passionate. He doesn’t show that softness within as easily as Hyunjin does, he's built up walls as he grew older for reasons that you couldn't begin to understand, but maybe that’s what makes it more special when he does let them fall, how you know he truly means it when he does something kind. His sweet smiles carry far more weight and depth than you ever stopped to realize.

“You okay? What’s up with you today?” Seungmin asks, careful but with a hint in his voice that he’s ready to tease depending on how you respond. Right. The reason you called him over today. You chew your lip as you look at him, and you know he’s been able to tell all day that something was off with you. You wanted to call this whole thing off, if you’re being honest; tell him you realized he was right, he’s always right, and this was a terrible idea that you shouldn’t have dragged him into. 

But the moment you faced him you lost all your nerve. Your mouth ran dry, the words lodged themselves in your throat, and you couldn’t bring yourself to speak them. It’s so fucking selfish, but you realized that without this fake relationship keeping you together, the distance between you would return. Once the charade is over, he’ll go back to hardly ever returning your touch, to emotional walls stacked so high you fear you could never climb them, to strained smiles and equally strained words. 

You’re not sure why Seungmin is more open these days; maybe intimacy and closeness, no matter the cause and regardless of lack of romantic intent attached to them, is enough to naturally break down a person’s barriers. You don’t even know why he has barriers, why he shields himself from you so strongly when you’re his best friend, but now that you’ve experienced him without his walls, you don’t want to go back. You’re terrible and selfish and it’s hardly a justification to keep your fake relationship going, but still..

“Are you getting nervous?” he tries again; the ball is approaching quickly now, and he suspects maybe you’re off because you fear your performance as a couple won’t be good enough, that maybe you won’t be as believable as you need to be. You want to tell him he’s probably right, that it’s just nerves and you’ll get over it and everything will be fine with the moment comes, but you know that’s not all there is to it. 

It feels so stupid looking back on how excitedly you chose a new dress for the occasion, planned how you’d match with Seungmin and parade yourself on his arm and bat your eyelashes at him while calling him the sweetest names you could come up with, all so Hyunjin would look on and maybe get jealous. You didn’t listen when Seungmin warned you it was a bad idea, didn’t entertain the truth that Hyunjin would likely be a good friend and not intervene, didn’t want to acknowledge how tunnel-visioned and selfish the fairytale romance you pursued made you. 

You kissed him, held his hands, hugged him close and cuddled him tight. Your heart ached and stomach fluttered and you ignored every blaring alarm in your brain because the ends were supposed to justify the means. And now you’re going to ruin not just one friendship, but two; because you don’t know how you’re going to face either of them when it all inevitably crashes and burns.

“I just.. aren’t I being really selfish? You told me this was stupid but I didn’t listen, and now I feel like I’m taking advantage of you,” you blurt it all out, watch as his eyebrows furrow and his expression changes. You don’t quite know what he feels; regret, frustration, exasperation..? All of them would be perfectly justified.

You swallow and you clench your hands into fists and you finally make a selfless decision, one you should’ve made before all these weeks passed you by and you became attached to a version of your best friend you were never supposed to have. “We should stop.” 

Seungmin looks almost hurt before he lets out a laugh; you can’t tell if it’s based in self-deprecation, irony, annoyance, or something even further beyond what you can understand from him. “I agreed to this,” he says, grabbing your arm and making you look at him again when you try to turn away and avoid his gaze, “I wanted– I want to help you. You know that, right? I know I can be difficult sometimes, but I’d never lie about that.”

Maybe you are terribly selfish and maybe you are taking advantage of him and maybe his heart will shrivel and die the moment this ends, but he doesn’t fucking care. He can be selfish too, and his selfishness makes him want to hold on for as long as he can, even if it’s fake, even if you never love him; pretending to is enough, it’s all he needs.

“That’s the problem though, isn’t it? You’re so selfless and I just..” you trail off; you don’t know what more you can bring yourself to say. He’s difficult, he’s frustrating, and he’s mean, but he’s not cruel. You know how sweet he actually is, how much he’d sacrifice for you if you asked him too, and it’s time you stopped relying on him for stupid shit like this and dragging him into your petty, dumb, naive problems and grow up a little.

Stop being the selfish princess you were raised to be and start being someone worthy of Seungmin’s unwavering friendship instead. You’d never intentionally hurt him, but the problem is you probably have– countless times that you probably aren’t even conscious of because your self reflection has come just a little too late.

You started this whole thing because the idea of losing Hyunjin made your heart ache; but the idea of losing Seungmin, that knowledge that you’ve very likely taken and hurt and been a terrible friend for years doesn’t just make your heart ache– it rips it out entirely. It’s weird, considering them both best friends but only just realizing how different those friendships actually worked– and how losing Seungmin as a friend is far more gutting than losing a potential lover in Hyunjin. 

And you know Seungmin would never hate you, would call you selfish or stupid or annoying but would absolutely never actually think badly of you, and that makes it all the worse. Seungmin wears a mask for you, you know it’s true even if you want to deny it; but the mask he wears is cracked, the paint is worn, and knowing it could all be your fault makes you feel impossibly anguished and sick. 

Seungmin frowns and lets you look away, though he still hesitates to let you go. He does though, eventually, and he falls to his back on your bed with a sigh. “You don’t need to worry about me, this is all fine, I’m fine,” he says but you don’t entirely trust him.

He’s too stubborn and selfless to admit you’ve ever hurt him, knows it would gut you to realize what you’ve done to him, and so he chooses to say nothing about it at all. Because regardless of the boundary of friend and lover and where you both lie in between those words, he loves you– not that you feel you deserve it. 

This isn’t entirely your fault either; he gave in way too easily. He knew it was a bad idea and he should’ve been more stern, made you see reason even if it made you cry and pout and whine for hours on end. He knows you're selfish and spoiled and a little naive when it comes to what romance means but he didn’t do anything to genuinely shut you down– because beneath it all, he’s just as selfish as you, and he wanted to be your boyfriend for a just a little while, even if being your boyfriend meant nothing. 

His walls are down but he’s still not being completely honest, you know he isn’t. The mask is back on but the cracks have grown, exposing more of the real Seungmin beneath, and he can’t hide himself away as easily as he used to– because now you’ve seen them.

The cracks, the imperfections, the instability. And you’ve taken them all in, deduced that they’re your fault, and you won’t let it go– because that’s what stubborn people like you do. You pick and you prod and you poke, until something bends or breaks and you finally get the result you want. 

But what do you want? To stop playing pretend? For Seungmin to admit that yeah, you have hurt him sometimes– not that he blames you. He knows it wasn’t ever once intentional, and he was never going to hold anything against you or leave you behind.

Or maybe you want him to admit he’s in love with you. Maybe you want him to say that he’s just as fucking hopelessly in love with you as you are with Hyunjin, and that the love he feels for you foolishly allowed for things to get way farther than they should have. 

You look at him hesitantly, the way he’s fallen onto your bed, his shirt ridden half up his stomach from the fall and the way his caramel colored hair fans out around him. He’s beautiful and despite everything you’ve just said, you want to crawl on his lap and kiss him. You try to blink the thought away, to scrub your mind clean from thoughts you shouldn’t be having. 

He sees the way your eyes linger on his lips, how you internally struggle between what you think you should and shouldn’t do, how even now you are trying to spare him when he doesn’t need to be spared. Consume him whole, eat away at him until there’s nothing left, he doesn’t fucking care– he just wants you, even if it’s temporary, even if you throw him away in the end in favor of someone better.

Not if, he has to remind himself, but when– because it’s inevitable, because you’ll never love him as more than a friend.

Seungmin reaches out to you, is close to touching you, but just as he used to, he hesitates before he drops his hand. The distance returns, and that should be a good thing; it hurts, but isn’t it what’s right? You don’t.. You’re not in love with him.

You can’t be– you just.. value him as a friend and don’t want to do anything to strain your friendship anymore than you already have. Everything you feel is confusing and weird and you don't know what to do with what you have now. 

What to do with your urge to be closer to him, or the way you blush when he smiles and calls you names, or how the content sighs he lets out while kissing and cuddling makes your stomach do flips. How the way he unconsciously squeezes you tighter fills you with butterflies, or how the way his hands linger before you begin to separate makes you want to go crawling back to his open arms. 

And there’s the impure thoughts– the ones you’ve never even had about Hyunjin despite being in love with him. The ones you have when you see his shirt ridden up like it is now, or how those sighs when you kiss him would sound if you took things just a step further.

You used to daydream about pure things like sharing a romantic dance or being given flowers on an anniversary– now your thoughts linger on things like Seungmin’s tongue in your mouth and his hand between your thighs. Things you definitely shouldn’t be daydreaming about if you’re as in love with Hyunjin as you say you are. 

You suck in a trembling breath and again try to push the thoughts you shouldn’t have away. Seungmin’s expression is contemplative and gentle, full of a care you don’t deserve. It’s no surprise he can read you like an open book, can tell you’re more upset about this than you should be. It should be a comfort that this charade is coming to an end, but all you feel is sharp, stinging guilt and unbearable pain in your chest. Your eyes burn and you feel as if you’re going to cry, but how terrible would that be? 

It would almost feel manipulative to cry in front of him now, after having put all that effort into trying to go back to normalcy. You’re so frustrated with yourself, so impossibly frustrated; you squeeze your clenched fists, your nails dig into your palms, your tears threaten to spill and you look away from Seungmin before they do. Because he’ll comfort you, and that’s not what you deserve. Obviously he knows, it’s not like you can hide it very well, but he doesn’t say anything. 

Instead, he reaches out again– and this time, he doesn’t stop himself or hesitate. The distance you’ve put between you has already closed. He pulls you down to him, makes you fall against his chest, your head winding up somewhere between his heart and his shoulder.

You can still hear it from your position above it, and the steady thumping soothes you. “The ball is soon,” he says quietly, “we can go as planned, and then decide what will happen with us after. If you still want to stop after that, it’s okay. Just.. don’t give up too soon.” 

You can tell he’s trying to sound sure of himself, but he’s just as lost in all this as you are. And though you still feel rattled with guilt and uncertainty, you nod. You trust Seungmin, and you may as well see this fake relationship through to the end– and the Hwang ball is where you meet that end, one way or another.

“Okay..” you mumble, chest tight and stomach knotted with guilt, but you do your best not to spiral again, to trust Seungmin’s word when he says you haven’t done wrong by him. 

He calls your name and you look up at him expectantly. His mouth opens, he goes to speak, but whatever he wants to say is swallowed back down, and is instead replaced with something more familiar. “You’re.. really annoying,” he whispers before he kisses you, and there’s a relief that spreads through your veins. “Asshole,” you whisper back and you feel him smile, the comfortable normalcy returning even in this situation that is anything but normal. 

You’re both stupid and stubborn and there’s no way this ends without someone having a broken heart, but for now it’s okay. For now, it’s all Seungmin needs; to be close to you and touch you and hold you and know that you were his, for however brief and false a time it may have been.

“Do you think we should share a guest room to make this more believable?” you mumble while walking through the halls of the Hwang Castle, hand intertwined with Seungmin’s while he carries both his luggage and your own. Hyunjin obviously prepared your rooms separately as you haven’t announced your relationship to him yet– not that it’s going to last much longer anyways. Whether you end up with Hyunjin by night's end or not, your fake relationship with Seungmin can’t proceed beyond this. 

“I dunno,” Seungmin replies, though your question was more absentminded musing than a genuine question you were expecting to have answered by him. “Maybe? Technically speaking, we’ve been “dating” for a couple months now. It’d probably be normal.” You hum and contemplate his answer for a moment before you look at Seungmin with a smile. “Let’s share my room then! Hyunjin always gives me the biggest room available.” 

“I fucking knew it,” Seungmin says in faux-exasperation as you giggle. He always felt like his guest rooms were smaller than yours; and he doesn't actually care, but it's fun to act like it bothers him, and it's even better to hear you laugh. “Spoiled brat. Still need luxury even when you’re in someone else’s place, huh?”

“Naturally. What kind of princess would I be if I didn’t get the best of everything?” He rolls his eyes despite the way a smile tugs on his lips and a laugh threatens to break. You turn a hall, and finally your guest rooms begin to come into sight– you've been to Hyunjin's place enough to know the layout, but it still doesn't make getting to the guest hall any less of a trek.

Seungmin unlinks your hands when you approach the double doors of the castle's best guest room, fumbling in his pocket for the keys you were given for just a moment before he finds the right one. He unlocks the door, walks inside with you and sets your luggage down in the corner of the room before turning to look at you. “You sure you want me to stay? I don’t mind going to my own room,” Seungmin offers and you quickly shake your head– maybe a little too quickly, but you won’t acknowledge how eager for him to stay you seem. 

“Well, I’ll probably need help getting ready,” you say; an excuse, sure, but it’s reasonable at least. But what about after that? When the ball is over and so too is your act, regardless of whether you get results with Hyunjin or not– would Seungmin still stay? Would you want him to stay? You think you would; you don’t know what that means or what it says about you, but it’s honestly what you’d want.

“If you’re sure, don’t mind if I make myself comfortable then,” Seungmin says as he flops himself on the extravagant guest bed. There’s still a couple of hours until the ball, and since he won’t take nearly as long getting ready as you, he decides it’s a good idea to get in a short nap.

Traveling always makes him tired, after all– especially when he’s going from your castle all the way to Hyunjin’s. He yawns and stretches out before he closes his eyes, and your eyes linger on him fondly for a moment before you turn to where Seungmin set your luggage. 

You rummage through your bags for everything you need to get ready; toiletries, makeup, your dress– you collect them all in your arms and carry them to the attached bathroom. You spend a fair amount of time in the shower, going over every skincare step meticulously and making sure you’re as soft as can be– not that it matters, really, since nothing is going to happen, but you feel more confident in yourself after going through the motions. You’re careful and methodical in the application of your makeup too; you can’t rush if you want to look perfect.

You hold your dress up to your body and imagine briefly how you’ll look in it while standing in front of the large, ornate mirror. That’s the downside to ordering online– you have no idea how the dress will actually fit you, but you hope you’ll look nice.

Nerves hit you again as you look at yourself, but you swallow them down the best you can as you lie the dress on the sink counter. You don’t know what you’re hoping for tonight anymore; whether you want Hyunjin to see you with Seungmin and get jealous, or if you want him to think you are a sweet couple and support you sincerely. 

It doesn’t matter either way; nothing about this is genuine. And you’re not sure if you can be happy with yourself if Hyunjin is jealous and realizes he likes you over a lie. But you’ve come this far, you’re already here and Seungmin has reassured you over and over again that this is something he thinks you should see through, so.. That’s all you have left to do. Just see it through until the end. 

Getting your underwear on, and then carefully slipping on your dress, here is where you need Seungmin’s help. It’s near impossible for you to pull up the zipper that lies along the spine of your dress, even if you stretch and reach behind you as far as your arm can go. Holding a hand to your chest so that the dress doesn’t slip back down your body, you carefully open the bathroom door and peek outside into the main room.

You weren’t sure if Seungmin really fell asleep after you’d left him alone in the room, but peeking out now, you can tell that he has. He’s in the same position on the bed as when you left him, his eyes serenely closed and breathing steady. You call his name, but he doesn’t react; so you try once more, raising your voice this time, but you’re still met with nothing in response. You step out of the bathroom and up to the bed cautiously, and you make one last effort to wake him by calling his name just in case.

It doesn’t work, of course; you didn’t really think it would anyways if you’re being honest, but it didn’t hurt to try. You cautiously reach out to his shoulder, and do your best to rouse him awake while still holding your dress up with your other hand. Seungmin slowly blinks awake, mumbling something you can’t decipher as his senses slowly return to reality one by one.

He blinks a few times more, processing the sight before him; you leaning towards him, your dress loosely covering your body with the support of the hand not placed on his shoulder. He refuses to let his eyes linger on the image of your barely concealed cleavage before him, instead putting all of his effort into looking back up to your face. "Need my help now?" he correctly assumes, and you nod as you straighten back up.

Seungmin sits up from the bed, watches you as you turn to return to the bathroom, expecting him to follow. He does his best to ignore what the sight of your exposed skin does to him; the only reason he has this view is because you trust him and view him as a best friend– he really can't afford to be having any impure thoughts about you. (A little late for that in all honesty, but he'll atone for it later.)

The door is wide open, but he knocks on the doorframe to announce himself before he steps through; a sign of respect and decency. "Thanks," you smile at him briefly as he steps inside the bathroom and takes his place behind you. "I can't zip it up on my own," you explain, and yeah, he can see that clearly; the bottom of the zipper lies on your tailbone, your panties ever so slightly peeking in the v-shape the zipper creates with the two sides of your dress.

He swallows and pretends he doesn't notice, instead looking to where the zipper ends just around your shoulder blades. “Do you think Hyunjin will think I look good?” you can’t help but ask as Seungmin’s hand falls to your zipper, slowly pulling it up. It gives you goosebumps– not the cold zipper on your skin, but the way his hand feels just over your spine, running along it as he zips up your dress.

You're not sure what reply you hope to hear; maybe it's a question with no right answer. “If he’s smart, he will,” Seungmin answers; he’d have to be an idiot not to. “You’re beautiful." You flush as you look at him in the mirror, standing behind you but not at all obscured thanks to your smaller frame. 

You know he means it– he teases and he pretends, but he’d never lie about something like that. You already know that to be true; he’s said it himself– that the thing’s he says with a serious tone are the things he really means. He’s not looking at you, his eyes fixed on your back until he’s finished with the zipper, ignoring the way the hooks of your bra stare back at him until your dress closes and they are obscured from his sight, the way they should be.

He finally meets your gaze again when he’s done, meeting your eyes through the reflection of the mirror. Your face feels impossibly hot, and you hope he thinks the pink on your face is from the makeup you applied as opposed to the real blush it is. You still have things to do; put on your accessories, fix-up and style your hair, put on your prettiest pair of heels, but even without all that flashy glamor added on, Seungmin already thinks you’re radiant as can be.

Though he’s done with the zipper, his hand hasn’t left your back yet, and neither of you have broken the gaze you keep in the mirror. There’s a moment where you think he’ll turn you around and kiss you, or that you’ll kiss him; and truly, he wants to, but he shouldn’t. This night is supposed to be about you and Hyunjin, and you don’t need the ‘practice’ anymore– it was only ever an excuse to begin with. 

He clears his throat as he lets you go, and you turn your gaze away from the mirror, swallowing down all your feelings and nerves as you rummage through your bag for the accessories you brought with you. “It won’t take me much longer to get ready,” you say as you continue to rummage through your bag– you found what you need, but taking it out means having to meet Seungmin’s gaze, and you’re not ready to do that again just yet.

“Right, I should get ready too,” Seungmin mumbles mostly to himself as he turns to leave. You don’t look up from your bag, even as he lingers in the doorway. You can tell he stopped to look at you, you can feel his eyes observing you, but still you don’t glance up at him. “Yeah, not much time left ‘til we gotta go,” you say, and he responds with a simple, quiet ‘yeah’ before he fully walks out into the main room. 

There’s a sense of dread that lingers– both of you having a similar feeling weighing on your hearts, while ironically thinking you feel it all by yourself, that the other person doesn’t possibly feel the same way. A situation that would easily be mended by communication, but the gap between what you perceive to be true, and the real truth, is not so easily crossed. The metaphoric rope that connects you and Seungmin together is frayed, and you worry that an uncomfortable conversation will cause that connection to completely snap. 

So you swallow your feelings once more, you put on your earrings and style your hair, and you realign your focus. You can’t keep thinking about what your affection for Seungmin means or why the thought of this ending tonight weighs on you so heavily. You’re close to getting what you’ve been working for, and that should be where your thoughts linger– on Hyunjin. The best friend you’ve always thought you had feelings for, the one you believed yourself to be in love with. 

Stepping inside the ballroom with Seungmin is utterly nerve wracking; it’s the moment you’ve been waiting for, the moment that 3 months of fake relationship practice were leading up to. This is where you show your best performance, where you parade around on Seungmin’s arm and look at him with the best heart eyes you can muster. Not that it’s a hard task, these days– you find yourself doing it without even thinking about it. 

You.. like him, if you had to guess. But do you like him more than you thought you liked Hyunjin? You guess that’s the answer you’re really trying to find tonight. You never thought it’s where you’d be today when you first conjured up this plan, there was no way to anticipate how much your newfound closeness with Seungmin would affect the feelings you thought you were so sure of. 

It’s natural to be confused, isn’t it? Surely anyone would be in this scenario; you can’t kiss and hug and cuddle someone for so long and feel nothing, right? And it’s your own fault, you can’t blame anyone but yourself for the predicament you’ve found yourself in. You reap what you sow, as your grandmother likes to say. “Don’t be so on edge, everything’ll work out,” Seungmin leans to whisper in your ear. 

You’ve been so tense ever since you left the guest room together– half nervous to see Hyunjin again after months and half ‘oh my god why does Seungmin look so good tonight.’ As if it wasn’t enough that you were confused about your feelings, Seungmin had to come out looking so devastatingly handsome in his perfectly tailored suit and neatly slicked hair. “Yeah, you’re right, sorry,” you respond and he shakes his head, offers a reassuring smile before he looks around the room.

“He’s around here somewhere, we’ll see him soon enough,” Seungmin says as his eyes continue to scan the packed ballroom. Oh, that makes sense; he thinks you’re tense because you haven’t run into Hyunjin yet. If things were the same as a few months ago, you think that may have been true. Now, you’re not really sure what’s true. Hyunjin will see you as a couple and he’ll either silently rage with envy or beam with joy for his two best friends– and you don’t know which outcome is the one you want anymore. 

“Oh, I think I see him,” Seungmin mutters to you, and discreetly points in the direction he thinks he’s found your other best friend. You see him now too, standing near the balconies looking bored out of his mind, champagne glass in hand. He’s not looking at anything in particular, just vaguely observing his surroundings while occasionally sipping from his drink– probably hoping you two will show up soon and save him from his boredom. 

You take a breath, wrap your arms around Seungmin's own arm and squeeze it close to your chest. “Now or never,” you mutter and he nods, steeling himself for the penultimate moment just as do. “Hyunjin!” you call from across the hall, dragging Seungmin along with you as you half-sprint up to him, your designer heels loudly clanking on the marble floor.

Hyunjin returns your smile when he spots you, and laughs when he sees Seungmin practicly scowling as he’s dragged along– it’s classic, really; you always do things like this to them. Just strong arm them along everywhere you want to go, through everything you want to do. 

“Hey! I’m glad you both made it, it’s been forever,” Hyunjin smiles as you complete your approach. He feels bad he hasn’t seen either of his best friends in months, but royal duties and all.. It kept him very unfortunately occupied. He looks at you both inquisitively when you don’t let go of Seungmin’s arm or untangle yourself from him– normally you would have by now, having reached the destination you wanted to drag him to. It’s curious, to say the least. 

Your hand goes from being wrapped around Seungmin and holding his arm, to intertwining your fingers as you hold his hand. Hyunjin raises a brow, but says nothing– he’ll wait for one of you to clear up what he’s thinking. “Mhm, we’ve been waiting to see you in person to tell you something important!” you say as you squeeze Seungmin’s hand, shooting him your best lovey dovey look before you bring your gaze back to Hyunjin. 

Seungmin wants to sigh and roll his eyes and call you dumb for looking at him like that, but he bites his tongue. It’s the last time you’ll ever shoot him with that look of pure puppy love, and it’s best not to ruin it by defaulting to his usual personality; cherish it while you have it, as they say. “Well spit it out then, don’t keep me on the edge of my seat,” Hyunjin’s smile grows, looking between the two of you with eager anticipation to hear the confession that lingers on your tongue. 

Hyunjin’s positive reaction deters you a little; surely he can see that you’re clinging to Seungmin to an unusual degree, but he doesn’t seem to react to it negatively at all– not even minutely. There’s no subtle furrow of the brow, no flash of sadness in his eyes that gets replaced by forced happiness, no twitch in his hands from jealousy or frustration. Seungmin was right, as always; Hyunjin is just going to be a good friend. He won’t have a single negative thing to say. 

“W-Well, we.. uh–” you stumble on your words, and curse yourself for floundering at the most pivotal moment. This is what everything you’ve done has been leading up to, you can’t falter now; and yet, you are. You look at Seungmin and your grip on his hand tightens, panic unwittingly settling in as a lump forms in your throat. He flashes you a look of sympathy, squeezes your hand in a subtle show of comfort, before he turns away from your gaze to look at Hyunjin. 

He doesn’t like it, but he’ll take the lead from here; for your sake. “We’re dating,” he says as confidently and smoothly as he can bring himself to. He lets go of your hand and wraps his arm around your waist, pulls you closer for added effect, sincerely tries his best to spark the jealousy he knew you wanted to see. But Hyunjin doesn’t look jealous, or sad, or even angry. He just looks.. happy. 

“Gosh, finally! Congrats! I always knew you two would end up together,” Hyunjin grins and gives Seungmin a friendly pat on the shoulder. You blink as you stare between them. Huh..? Finally? What does that mean?

Even Seungmin is taken aback, and mirrors what you were internally thinking. But unlike you, his utterly shocked ‘huh?’ comes out verbally. “Yeah, I always saw the way you were looking at her, Minnie. You were so obvious, I knew it was only a matter of time,” Hyunjin says with enthusiastic joy that sends you completely off kilter.

What the fuck.

You feel like your entire world has been flipped upside down. What does he mean he always saw the way Seungmin looked at you? How did he look at you..? How does he look at you? Hyunjin’s puzzled now as he looks between you both; you look like your entire sense of reality has been shifted, while Seungmin looks positively mortified. “Sorry, uh– did he not mention that when he confessed?” Hyunjin asks, and then shit– maybe you were the one who confessed.

Seungmin is stubborn and aloof in his cool persona, he's the type to avoid saying what he really thinks by using teasing words, will only look at you softly when he thinks no one else is looking his way. Hyunjin can easily imagine that he has yet to admit the true depth of his secret pining, or confessed how much he actually likes you. He feels bad for outing Seungmin if that’s the case. 

“My bad, I assumed you knew since you’re dating now and all,” he laughs a bit awkwardly while shooting Seungmin a sympathetic look. One that’s meant to say ‘sorry for blowing your stubborn, cool-guy persona.’ It’s just.. Hyunjin thought it was as obvious to you as it was to him.

The way his hard expression would soften the minute you smiled at him, how he’d laugh when you’d banter back after he said something teasing and mean, how his eyes would always linger on even if there were countless other people in the room.. Wasn’t it obvious he liked you this entire time? 

“I guess I’m just surprised to hear you call it out,” you try to recover from the blatant shock, play it off as something different than it is– as if you knew all along, and you’re just surprised that Hyunjin knew too. Hyunjin chuckles a little, looking a bit more relieved after your statement. “Sorry if I ruined the illusion of Seungmin being the cool, aloof type. He’s actually a big softie, but I guess you’ve realized that by now,” he smiles. 

“Yeah I, uh– I’ve realized that,” you smile back, a bit tensely, but a smile nonetheless, “That’s what I like about him.” Seungmin, still trying to recover from his own world being flipped upside down, finally looks at you again. He doesn’t know what to say, doesn’t know how to recover from this wildly unexpected turn in the conversation. Still realizing he has his hand on your waist, and unsure where you now stand and whether or not this is appropriate or okay anymore, he hesitantly lets you go. 

You hold his hand when he does, but it doesn’t feel like solace or consolation the way it normally would. Not hollow, or empty, but just.. not full of the same warmth it normally carries. He’s so impossibly anxious and scared– that you’re furious with him, that you’ll cut him off when the night is over, that you’ll accuse him of sabotaging this whole thing by agreeing to be your pretend boyfriend when he had very real feelings for you. 

In reality, you just feel terrible about yourself and what you’ve caused. You already felt bad before the night began, and now you feel even worse– you never would’ve asked Seungmin to do this if you'd known he had feelings for you. And now his feelings were called out in the worst way possible, and you don’t think you’ll ever scrub how mortified Seungmin looked in that moment from your memory. And it was entirely your fault. 

He should’ve been allowed the chance to tell you on his own terms, and you ruined that chance. You probably also ruined any chance at having a normal relationship with him if you wanted one– because how do you recover from the humiliation of being called out on something you thought was a well guarded secret, right in front of the very person that secret was about. This entire time, he’s liked you, maybe even loved you, and you undeniably hurt him. 

He tried to deter you, he told you this wouldn’t work and he tried to resist but you pressed and pushed and prodded until he gave in. And while you could argue some of his acts were not entirely selfless, as you’re sure he must’ve enjoyed kissing you and being close to you knowing what you do now, how could you blame him for indulging in a love with someone he wanted to be with while expecting, believing, knowing, it would come to an end when you got what you wanted?

All those years you spent pining over Hyunjin, Seungmin spent them pining over you, and he just listened, he took it in, and he never stopped supporting you, not even once. Even tonight, when it was probably breaking his heart to do so, he tried his best to reassure you, he tried to make Hyunjin jealous on your behalf.. And he complained, sure he did, but it was more part of the usual banter between you two than jealousy or hurt. At least, that’s what you always thought it was.. You never imagined there’d be anything more hiding beneath the surface. 

You should’ve known, though. It should’ve been obvious– how can you call yourself Seungmin’s best friend and not have realized? And it’s not that you missed the signs because you were willfully ignorant, but you were so tunnel-visioned, selfish, and absorbed that you never stopped to notice any of the changes. It wasn’t even until recently that you realized how much a wall he’d put up, how much he’d forced distance between you..

It makes sense, in hindsight; that it wasn’t for your sake that he stopped doing certain things and acting certain ways, but his own. While you were watching Hyunjin like a hawk for any sign that he might like you, you missed all the signs Seungmin left. You never noticed a single thing, and being reminded of how selfishly you’d spent the teenage years of your friendship makes your heart ache terribly.

“Hey uh, sorry to cut this short but.. I think Seungmin’s feeling embarrassed. Might be in need of a reset, y’know?” you say, trying to come across as a happy girlfriend stealing the chance to tease her boyfriend while also still having his best interest at heart. You look at Seungmin, try to offer him reassurance despite the situation, but he doesn’t look back at you.

He’s facing Hyunjin, but he doesn’t look at him either, not really. It feels like he’s far away, somewhere distant that you can’t reach, busy reconstructing all the walls he’d let fall away, trying to build them back up as high as he can in preparation for the heartbreak he’s soon to face. 

“Of course,” Hyunjin smiles, giving his full blessing, “just come find me again later! I’d rather be a third wheel with you two lovebirds than listen to my father drone on about tax management again.” You giggle a bit and nod, waving him goodbye and forcing Seungmin out of his haze by dragging him away with you.

You glance around as you push through the crowd for a private space to talk– your guest room is much too far away and the tension while going back would likely be too much for either of you to bear; better to find somewhere nearby to have this conversation. You fail to make it to a room after exiting the ballroom; Seungmin stops in the middle of the hallway, preventing you from dragging him along, and you’re forced to let him go and turn around to look at him.

He’s pained and lost but he tries to bring himself back to the aloof persona he once had mastered, to not show how hurt and afraid he is right now. But the cracked mask that is his cool facade has splintered irreparably, and you can only see him for who he really is now. 

“Sorry it didn’t work out how you wanted. Sucks, and I know you must be hurt, but don’t give up, you can still try again, maybe there’s something else you haven’t thought of yet, you can–” Seungmin speaks in a quick ramble, not even acknowledging the massive elephant in the room; his feelings for you.

“Seungmin,” you cut him off with a frown, and he’s hesitant to meet your gaze; he doesn’t know what he’ll be met with, and try as he might to reconstruct himself back to the person he was before this whole thing started, he knows deep down it’d be in vain. 

Your friendship has been irrevocably changed, and to pretend otherwise would be futile. Still, he can’t stop himself from trying– it’s all he can think to do. “You have feelings for me,” you state it plainly, and Seungmin swallows but says nothing. Doesn’t confirm, nor deny, because both options seem fucking terrible if he’s honest. Denying it is pointless and would just be a blatant lie, and confirming, making it clear that he agreed to be your fake boyfriend despite his feelings for you.. He doesn’t know how that makes him look.

In Seungmin’s head, you’ll either view him as pathetic or as a saboteur, and neither is ideal. “Why didn’t you ever tell me? If I’d known I’d never have..” He scoffs at your sentiment and looks at you incredulously. “And why would I have? You’ve been obsessed with Hyunjin for years. And I’m supposed to tell you how I feel? Be serious Y/N, there’s no way I could’ve ever told you. And even if I had, you would’ve rejected me, so what would’ve been the point?” 

“I–” you want to say that’s not true, that you wouldn’t have rejected him or broken his heart, but who are you kidding? It absolutely fucking is. It hurts to hear it this way, but he isn’t wrong about any of it. Still, just because he’s right, that doesn’t mean you’re entirely wrong either. Even if you’d have rejected him, surely he still should’ve been honest with you? You’d never have done this if you’d known. 

You made mistakes, but so did he, right? You know you've been selfish for way too long, but you're not the kind of person to intentionally hurt a friend. You never would've dragged Seungmin through the mud just to get what you want, and the fact that he hid his feelings and allowed himself to be hurt just to make you happy.. That's not the kind of thing you want him to do.

Your friendship shouldn't be built on Seungmin's self-sacrifice, he shouldn't allow himself to be second place just to make you and Hyunjin happy. To be selfless is a virtue, but too much can leave him with nothing, and that's been your concern since the day you realized how selfish you've been. You realized that Seungmin will give, and give, and give, and he'll never ask you for anything in return. But that’s not what friendship and love should be built upon. Surely he understands that you never wanted this– for your best friend to offer himself up as your emotional martyr.

And with the confusion of your feelings compounding on it, the realization that maybe it’s Seungmin who you love while your infatuation with Hyunjin was hardly more than a fairytale childhood crush– how are you supposed to live with yourself after causing unspeakable heartache to him? And would he even believe you if you told him that you love him? You don’t even know if you can believe yourself.

He sees how hurt you are, the confusion and the guilt and the sorrow, and the anger that grew within him instantly deflates. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have snapped you, I just– I need to be alone,” Seungmin mutters his apology and walks briskly past you, towards the direction of the guest hall.

You call to him, but he doesn’t stop or turn around, and you don’t follow. You want to, but you know you should respect that he needs time to himself; he has a lot to process, as you’re sure you do too. You owe it to him, yourself, and even Hyunjin, to sort out your feelings too.

Seungmin didn't see you or Hyunjin again that night, couldn't bring himself to keep playing the pretend boyfriend after every thing that happened. He went to your guest room for his stuff, isolated himself in his own room for the remainder of the evening, leaving the door to your room unlocked and the key resting on the desk so you could get in and out without having to speak with him.

He felt bad about it, but he just couldn't face you again; it was too difficult. Apparently, you returned to the ballroom alone and told Hyunjin the truth. Seungmin knows because he woke up in the middle of the night to countless texts from Hyunjin– apologizing, saying he didn't know, offering his condolences and to be there for him. It fucking sucked, made him feel like even more of a pathetic loser.

You told Hyunjin the truth because it felt like the right thing to do following what happened; he would've known eventually anyways, so it felt better to rip the band-aid off right away. And you confessed a lot more than just that; you told Hyunjin everything. About how this whole thing started, about your confusion on how you felt now, about how terribly your heart ached after realizing how much damage you'd caused.

Hyunjin offered you his shoulder to cry on, hugged you and apologized even though he didn’t need to, and ironically, that’s partly what gave you the answer you were looking for. Because your heart didn’t pound when he hugged you, you didn’t get butterflies when he wiped your tears, your face didn’t flush when offered his hand for support. It was so platonic– and the only time you smiled was when he said he was sure Seungmin would forgive you and everything will work out.

It’s over a day when Seungmin finally sees you again; you have to pass through his city to get to yours, and so it always made sense to leave Hyunjin’s castle together when traveling home. The ride is tense and awkward, to say the least.

You can’t bring yourself to say a word and neither can he, the two of you only taking peeks at each other when you’re sure the other isn’t looking. Seungmin stares out the window and you stare at your hands resting in your lap, while your driver compensates for the unusual atmosphere by turning up the radio.

Approaching Seungmin’s estate makes you indescribably emotional. A lump forms in your throat when the door is opened for him and he exits the car, you clench your fists and try to swallow down the intense emotion when the door closes and you watch him begin to walk away.

It doesn’t feel right, none of this feels right. You’re worried that if you don’t talk now, then you never will; that the damage will be irreparable if you let the distance grow and feelings fester. You need to talk to Seungmin, and you need to do it now. 

You hastily unbuckle your seatbelt and open the car door, running out to chase after Seungmin and not stopping even as your driver calls to you from behind. Seungmin, who is almost to his front door, turns around when he hears the commotion, and is surprised to see you quickly approaching him.

“What are you doing..?” he can’t help but ask; really though, he shouldn’t be surprised. You always do things like this, and once you’ve made a decision to do something, you’ll stubbornly stick to that decision ‘til the end. You’ve decided you’re going to talk to him, and he knows there’ll be no getting out of it.

“We need to talk,” you assert yourself clearly, even go as far as to step past him and into his house before he can. What a brat; he almost smiles from how familiar it is. The guards who were holding the door open for Seungmin look a little puzzled, but they make no comment– it’s not their place to do so. Seungmin doesn’t see you when he steps inside, but it’s easy enough to guess where you went. 

And he finds you exactly where he expected to, waiting for him right outside his bedroom door. Now or never, he thinks as he unlocks it, offering for you to step inside first. You do just that, waiting until follows behind and closes the door to speak.

“What are we now? Friends? More than friends? ..Neither?” you cut straight to the chase, leaving no room for awkward and unnecessary pre-emptive small talk. “I don’t know. Isn’t that up to you?” Seungmin says, stepping past you to sit on his bed. 

You frown as you watch him, but stay firm. “It shouldn’t be entirely up to me. What do you want?” “Does it matter what I want?” Seungmin cuts back. It’s a bit harsh, but he’s still trying to defend against his heart getting torn to shreds; you can’t entirely blame him.

“Of course it matters,” you tell him, voice soft with pain. “Sorry,” he mumbles again, sighing as he flops back and stares at the ceiling. He knows he needs to stop snapping at you, his pain isn’t all in your hands. It takes two to tango, and he did more than his fair share of leading the dance. 

Honesty scares him. Raw emotion scares him. Telling you how he’s always felt about you scares him, and telling you what he hopes you’ll be scares him. But that fear has always been a hindrance, and he needs to stop being shackled by it; especially when you’re trying so hard to hear what he really has to say. “I’ve always liked you, for years I’ve liked you. But you– I didn’t think there was anything I could do. So I just.. didn't do anything.” 

You sit down next to him, looking down at him as you do, and he in turn moves his gaze towards you. You can see the apprehension in his eyes, and maybe it’s presumptuous of you to do so, but you lay your hand over his in an effort to reassure him. He looks a bit surprised, but he accepts it, and rotates his hand around so you can hold it properly. “I try not to, but even now I still want to be with you,” he admits, and it’s not easy for him to do, but he can’t shove down how he feels anymore– not if he wants a chance with you. 

“So I didn’t ruin what we have?” you ask and Seungmin quickly sits up, squeezing your hand as he does. “Of course not, I mean– I was upset and I took it out on you, but.. You could never ruin anything,” he says, emphasizing the point by moving closer to you; and it makes you feel warm and happy. Because he’s bridging the gap on his own, willingly putting his walls back down, leaving the mask off.

“I'm so sorry for everything, I really am. And it's okay if you don't want to, but can we go back to what we were before? Well– not before before, but like– when you were my fake boyfriend. But not fake this time either, I want you to be my real boyfriend, and–” You’re rambling, you know, but you’re just trying to be clear, you just don’t want to mess this up again, so–

“Shut up already, idiot,” Seungmin says, an affectionate smile and lilt in his voice before he’s pressing his lips to yours to stop your rambling himself. “Don’t be an asshole when I’m pouring my heart out,” you complain, smiling despite yourself.

“I thought you wanted to go back to before though?” he says with a grin, and you roll your eyes and shove him, mumbling ‘I hate you’ while he chuckles. And it feels good. It feels like everything you’ve been missing and everything you needed. No tension, no dread, no fear– the way it should have always been.

You kiss him first this time, and he pulls you in closer, lets you crawl your way into his lap the way you’ve wanted to for weeks at this point (not that he’s even aware how much you’ve fantasized about it– at least, you hope he hasn’t.)

“I missed you,” you breathe as you settle on his lap, and he pulls away, looks up at you with the smug smile that tells you a smartass comment is going to follow. “We were only apart for like, a day,” he can’t help himself from saying, laughing softly when you pout and whine. 

“I know that! But it was the most miserable day of my life, I’ll have you know,” you huff, pout growing as you turn your face away and cross your arms. Seungmin’s expression softens, and he reaches out to your face, rests his hand on your cheek and urges you to look at him again.

He understands, he really does; it was just as miserable for him. So many doubts and fears wreaking havoc on his brain and making him assume the worst had still yet to come. “I missed you too,” he mumbles softly, earnestly, and a bit shy. 

Seungmin isn’t used to vulnerability and honesty, but he’ll get used to it for you. He’ll learn to tell you over and over again how much he loves you if that’s what you need. And the dynamic you have is fun; you like the banter, the teasing, and how much affection lies beneath the surface of his spoken words. You don’t expect him to completely change, nor do you want him to; but he can stand to be a little more open with his feelings. Just a little.

"Got you to admit it," you smile, and he scoffs when he realizes he's been duped. He calls you a brat, lovingly and affectionately, before he’s kissing you again. You push him backwards onto the bed, gentle but still assertive, continuing to kiss him while his hands find purchase on your hips. He lets out that little sigh as you kiss him– the one that always drives you crazy and makes your stomach do flips.

You used to feel guilt over what that noise caused you to think, the way it caused your body to react and where it led your mind to wander. You wonder if it’s okay now; to allow your mind to go there, if Seungmin would be okay with going further than you’ve gone before– kissing new spots, touching new places, experiencing new sensations. You wonder if he’s thought about it as much as you have, and if guilt made him swallow it down when he did, same as you. 

In the few months of your fake relationship, despite all that practiced closeness and kissing, you never made out– you’ve gotten close, hands starting to roam slightly too close to an intimate place, tongues just seconds away from passing parted lips, but one of you would always stop when you realized you were about to get carried away. And he’d gotten hard more than once, but you always pretended not to notice, acting like you didn’t feel it pressing into your thigh while your legs were tangled together. 

Acknowledging it would’ve meant confronting feelings you weren’t ready to at the time, and there was always the possibility it meant nothing, that it was just a physical reaction independent of his brain and how he felt about you. But now that you know all that you do, you hope it means he’s always wanted more with you..

And you have to admit, the self restraint it’d take not to act on his desires makes him all the more appealing. What can you say except consent is key, and knowing he has self control even when he wants you bad is sexy.

He does it again– that unconscious squeeze of your hips the more you kiss him, and you wonder what exactly it stems from; a desire to have you as close as possible, a way to ground himself as he gets worked up, or maybe even both. You hope it's both.

You pull away from his kiss, sitting up and staring down at him, your hands lingering on his chest. “I want to ask you something,” you speak softly, voice almost a whisper, face growing impossibly hot. “And don’t give me a smartass reply, or I’m leaving!” You follow up sternly, and Seungmin chuckles, grabs one of the hands you have resting on his chest, and intertwines your fingers. 

“I won’t, promise,” he says, not a hint of teasing in his voice or his smile. As fun as it is to tease you and poke fun, he can tell when the moment calls for him to be earnest and take you seriously. You breathe a sigh of relief, or maybe you’re letting out a breath to ground yourself before you speak; either way, Seungmin watches you attentively, a bit puzzled but entirely patient.

“Do you.. Did you ever think about, uh– doing more when we were kissing..?” you ask, nervously chewing on your lip as you wait for him to respond. “Oh,” Seungmin blinks, his own face growing hot alongside yours. He promised he’d give an honest, serious answer, but even if he didn’t, he doubts he would’ve been able to play it off.

Looking into your eyes while he tries to admit it makes the words lodge in his throat, so he turns his head and looks away, the hot red of his blush burning all the way to the tips of his ears. Same as when he admitted he wanted to kiss you, all he says is “yes.” No elaboration, no ifs, whens, or buts; just yes. And that’s all he needs to say, really. It speaks for itself.

He hesitates to look back at you and see your reaction, but the moment he does turn his head, you’re kissing him again, more eager and impassioned than you ever have before, the noise of surprise he lets out muffled by your lips. Your tongue peeks out, just barely brushes over his own, almost cautious, and an involuntary noise of approval escapes you when you feel his tongue slip past his lips to meet yours.

You separate your hand from Seungmin’s, and he brings his hand back to your hip while yours returns to his chest. You open your mouth for him, invite his tongue further in, and he squeezes your hips once more when you do. The feeling of his tongue sliding against yours is dizzying, makes your stomach fill to the brim with butterflies, excitement building in your gut in ways you’ve never experienced. 

You feel him growing hard beneath you, and you don’t ignore it the way you would have before; you purposely press into it, grind yourself down on Seungmin’s lap and swallow the gasp he lets out. You lose track of how long you stay like this, grinding on his lap while your tongues swirl around each other's, your heavy breaths and every noise swallowed by the other. You’re out of breath by the time you finally pull away, your chests rapidly rising and falling, his shirt twisted in your palms. 

Seungmin looks almost dazed, and to be fair, you sort of are too; neither of you ever expected you’d be here like this. To Seungmin, you were unobtainable; someone he loved but could never have, and he tried so many times to make his peace with it, though he never could.

There's a part of him that still can’t even believe you’re choosing him, that thinks maybe this is a dream he’ll soon wake up from. And in your case, it took you too long to realize your priorities were wrong, and your feelings didn’t always mean what you thought they did; that love is more than what looks good and correct on paper. 

You realized you don’t need perfection and matching titles and fairytale romance. Love doesn’t follow a formula, it doesn’t adhere to standards of nobility and preconceived notions on who a princess should love. You have two best friends, and they’re both vitally important to you, but the one you truly fell in love with turned out to be so opposite from what you thought your type truly was.

You love Seungmin, with his quips, sarcasm, imperfections, and all. It’s unfortunate you didn’t realize it sooner, but you’re happy you’re sure of it now. And now that you have him, you’re never letting him go. 

“I want you,” you tell him, and though you’re the most shy you’ve ever been, and can’t quite look him in the eye as you admit it, you still get it out, clear and direct. It’s impressive, enviable, how shyness doesn’t prevent you from ever speaking your mind.

“Do you.. want me too?” you ask, and he can feel your hands trembling as you continue to hold onto his shirt, waiting for his answer with bated breath. “Yes,” he assures; always has, and always will. 

You smile before you lean down to capture his lips in another kiss, wet, hot and messy. “This okay?” you pull away just slightly to ask, still so close that he can feel your every breath on his lips, your hand traveling down his chest and over his stomach. More than okay, he wants to say, but all that he can manage to let out is another “yes.” Your fingers ghost over the hem of his pants, his breath hitching when you palm him over the fabric.

It’s embarrassing how much pre-cum has stained and moistened the fabric of his pants, and he’s sure you can feel it beneath your hand. He closes his eyes, furrows his brows as he tries not to become flustered and increasingly more red. A breathy groan escapes him when you slide your hand inside, your hand encircling his cock, and he opens his eyes to look at you, twitching involuntarily when he sees the hungry look in your eyes. 

You kiss him when he starts to bite at his lip, greedily swallow every groan that tumbles out of him. Seungmin can’t believe how much better your hand feels than his own, how soft and warm and perfect– and when you pull away from his lips to stare down at him, he looks up at you like you hold the entire world in your hands. You’ve never done this before, but instinct carries you far, and if Seungmin’s reactions are any sign, you’re doing a good enough job so far. 

Carefully removing your hand from inside his pants and sitting up completely, you move your hands to the end of your dress, where it pools on your upper thighs, and take it in your hands, pulling it up and over your head, tossing it onto the floor behind you. Seungmin’s eyes grow wide, swallowing thickly as he stares at you. He wasn’t expecting it, but it makes sense that you’d do this; you’ve always been the type to act first and foremost. 

You smile at him, shy and sweet, but still impossibly confident too. You take his hands and bring them to your chest, let him grope you over your bra, and it sends him reeling. You’re assertive, direct, a go-getter; when you know you want something, you just go for it, simple as that. But still, this is– you’re gonna drive him crazy before the night is over. You reach behind your back, unhook your bra with familiar ease, the straps sliding down your arm.

Seungmin swallows, knowing the moment he lets you go your bra will fall from your body and expose your chest to him. Deciding to take a page out of your book, and display some confidence despite the fact that his face is impossibly hot, he takes his hands away, lifts his back off the bed and pulls his own shirt off before he can get distracted by the image of you bare before him.

You toss your fallen bra aside, and he allows himself to stare for just a moment before he brings a hand to the nape of your neck and brings you down to kiss him. You squeak in surprise, but then he feels you smiling against his lips as you return his kiss. Mirroring what you did before, his hand travels between your thighs, feeling your heat over your panties. It’s a bit of an awkward reach that causes strain on his arm, but the minute he feels the wet patch, he doesn’t even fucking think about the strain anymore. 

Seungmin brings his fingers to the hem of your panties, glancing at you before he moves any further. You nod at him, giving him permission to slip his hand inside. And fuck, you’re soaked– he barely even has to move his fingers around to get them completely coated. “You’re– ‘s so wet,” he breathes out, almost amazed, and you whine, burying your face in his shoulder as some semblance of shyness finally clutches you.

“Your fault,” you mumble, and Seungmin chuckles, kissing the top of your head affectionately. “You’re cute when you’re being shy,” he tells you, and you quickly lift your head to glare at him.

“Don’t get cocky, I will actually kill you,” you threaten. “And spend the rest of your life without me when just one day makes you miserable?” he teases, and you whine, grabbing one of his pillows and hitting him with it. 

“Remind me to never tell you when I miss you ever again,” you huff, and Seungmin coos, the menace that he is, before he pulls you into a sweet, passionate kiss. You easily melt into it, further complaints dying when his tongue touches yours. He takes your breasts in his hands again, thumbs rubbing over your nipples and making your entire body shudder. You gasp when he takes them between his fingers, squirming and whimpering when he rolls and softly pinches them. 

His cock unceremoniously twitches in response to your pleasured noises, each one driving him crazier than the last; he needs you bad. “Want you,” he mumbles against your lips, and you hum, pulling away to look at him.

“Wanna fuck me?” you ask, head tilted as a coy smile plays on your lips. Fucking hell– you call him a menace, but you’re the real threat here; you make him insane. “Isn’t that obvious?” he asks, ignoring the heat on his face and trying to act as unphased by your words as possible. 

“Yeah, it is actually,” you smile and he scoffs, rolling his eyes as you giggle. Menace. You lift your hips off his lap, moving off to the side of the bed so you can slide your panties down your legs. He watches you intently, swallowing when you turn back to him and gaze at him expectantly.

Right, he has to get undressed too. Lifting off the bed, he tries not to think about the fact that you’re staring at him as he pulls his pants and underwear down his thighs in one motion. You crawl back in his lap when he’s finished kicking the bunched fabric off his legs, neither of you paying any mind to where on his floor it lands.

Seungmin’s brain feels like it’s going to short circuit while he’s staring at you; you’re beautiful, sexy, straddling his lap entirely naked, a moment he thought would only ever exist in his wet dreams. You take a breath, steady your nerves as you reach between your bodies to take his cock in your hand. 

It twitches in your hand, throbs as you align it with your dripping hole. You swallow, glancing back up at Seungmin’s face before you act. He can’t take your other hand in his as you’re using it to support your weight, so instead he reaches for your face, gently caressing your cheek with his thumb. You lean into his touch, smiling softly and indulging in his affection for just a moment before you start to slowly sink down on him. 

You squeeze your eyes shut, bottom lip caught between your teeth, nails digging into the flesh of his shoulder as you continue. Even just the sensation of the tip pushing inside is overwhelming, and the more of him you take, the more the pleasure in your gut builds. It’s unfamiliar, there’s a sting and a dull ache, but mostly it just feels good– better than anything you’ve ever felt. 

You open your eyes and look at Seungmin when your hips are finally flush with his, butterflies exploding when you see him struggling to keep himself together. His breaths are harsh and heavy, sweat dripping down his forehead, jaw clenched as he tries to prevent himself from cumming too fast. “You– you okay?” he asks, voice tense with effort, and you nod, leaning down to capture his lips in a hungry kiss. 

He throbs when you do, his hands moving to your hips and holding them tightly, your naked chests pressed together. When you’re ready, you experimentally roll your hips, whimpering softly into the kiss while you cling to his body. He groans with each slow roll of your hips, and it takes all he has not to bruise you in his grip and to stop his hips from chasing yours when you start to carefully bounce. 

It’s slow at first, still adjusting and finding the rhythm you're most comfortable with, what works for you and what feels good, but when you figure it out, God, please have mercy on him. The noises you make turn his brain into an absolute puddle, and when you whimper out his name he doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to recover. And the way you clench around him, the wet sounds between your legs and of your thighs slapping together each time your hips rise and fall back to his lap– he can’t fucking take it. 

“M-Minnie–” you gasp, your pace faltering, legs screaming from all the exertion. “C-Close, but– ‘m tired,” you whine and pout, doing your best to push through the fatigue, but you’re not sure how much longer you can. Your legs and knees ache terribly, having been bent long before his dick was even inside you, and they’re in desperate need of a break. “Wanna switch?” he asks and you quickly nod, uttering a small “please,” as you still your hips.

Seungmin helps you lie on your back, quickly taking his place between your legs and pressing himself back inside in one swift motion. You gasp, eyes rolling back when he starts to quickly fuck into you, your hands clutching and twisting the sheets beneath you. He grabs your hands and makes you hold his instead, intertwines your fingers and makes no complaint when your nails dig into the flesh under his knuckles. 

He kisses you desperately, tongue messily swirling around yours, swallowing every loud whimper and moan that spills from your throat. Tears prick the corners of your eyes, your stomach knots and twists, your entire body trembles from the overwhelming pleasure. You snake your dominant hand from out of his grip and bring it to your clit, rubbing it in quick, messy circles. He pulls away from your lips to look between your bodies and watch, cursing when you squeeze him tighter. 

Before you know it, you’re gasping and crying, body jolting and squirming as your orgasm washes over you, hot pleasure licking every inch of your body. Seungmin’s head falls forward, gritting his teeth as he sloppily fucks you through it, his own release not far behind. You’re breathless and panting, but you grab his face and pull him into another kiss regardless, and it sends him over the edge, his eyes rolling back as his cum shoots inside you in long, hot spurts. 

Seungmin pulls out slowly, carefully, paying no mind to the mess his cum trickling out of you makes on his blankets. It doesn’t matter, he can call someone to change the sheets for him later– right now he just wants to focus on you. He lies next to you and kisses you, over and over, holding you close to his chest and squeezing you in his arms.

“Clingy, aren’t we?” you playfully mutter against his lips, and he can’t even bring himself to say something witty in response. “Yeah,” he smoothly admits, not denying one bit how infatuated he is with you, “I’m obsessed with you. That a problem?”

You blink, all the red that left your face instantly returning– you weren’t expecting a response like that, nor for him to say it so earnestly. “Not since I love you,” you say after you recover, smiling shyly and giggling when he seems surprised. “Do you?” he asks, and you pout; does he still not think you do, even after all that? 

“Of course I do! I love you so much, Minnie, you– you’re the only one I want,” you speak from the heart, and Seungmin smiles, playful and smug. “I know. I just wanted to hear you say it again,” he tells you, and you shove him, whining loudly when he laughs.

“You’re such an ass!” you cry, and he pulls you back to him, hugging you close and pecking your lips when you pout. “I love you too,” he says, so sweetly that it makes you melt. 

You stay cuddled together like that for some time, limbs tangled together, comfortable and secure. Neither of you wants to be the one to break away first, and though you teased him for it, you love how clingy Seungmin can be when he lets his guard down. You hope he leaves it down a lot from now on; because you love him, and with how stubborn you are, you’ll never let him be pried from your fingers. He’s yours, and you're his, now, forever, always.

It took longer than you would’ve liked to realize it, but this is the love you’ve always wanted. Seungmin completes you, he’s your missing piece, the one who understands you. Similar in the ways that matters, and contrasts you perfectly in the places you differ.

You bicker and you tease and sometimes you fight, but you love with your whole hearts; and you’ll never again doubt that or be confused on what it is you want, because this is it. It’s not the fairytale you dreamed of as a kid, but it’s better than that; because it’s real, Seungmin’s love is real, and there’s nothing better you could ever ask for.

[astraystayyh]

Fic recs

some of the fics I've read on here that really left a mark on me. some of them contain smut and i will mark them as such, mdni with those!

the dating experiment | hyunjin x reader. slow burn. fluff. angst. fake dating. @caseiloveu

one of my fav hyunjin fics, the whole setting is so cute and if you love pining you'll love this!

adulthood can wait | jeongin x reader. fluff. reassurance. @inniejeonginnie

the sweetest innie fic. it made me feel very seen and comforted on a topic that makes me anxious!!

wedding cake samples | felix x reader. fluff. @caseiloveu

this was sooo cute. the idea is original too and their relationship was the cutest.

evermore | hyunjin x reader. non idol!au, slow burn. barista hyunjin. fluff. smut. @staytheword

one of the first hyunjin fics i read on here but i still remember it!! it's so well written and their relationship is so soft :(

nothing, everything | han x reader. angst. comfort. @inniejeonginnie

the softest han comfort. truly felt like drinking warm tea on a cold day.

jealousy, jealousy! | series of ot8 x reader where the boys/reader are jealous. some of them have smut. @candlewaxandp0lar0ids

i remember i read all the 8 parts of this series in one go, i loved how it was written and how natural it flowed!

royal guard!minho x princess!reader | fluff, angst, light smut @leviackermanscleaningbuddy

i love royal aus and this was amaaaazing!!!!! loved LOVED the tension that comes with forbidden love

better left unsaid | minho x reader. angst. @felixore

i read this so long ago but i remember thinking THIS IS REAL ANGST. loved it

eighteen | best friend seungmin x reader. university au. slow burn. fluff. angst @soobnny

ONE OF THE BEST seungmin fic on this app!! read this at 3am and i couldn't pause it because it got me hooked LOVED it sm!!!!!

the things we define as love | seungmin x reader. university au. strangers to lovers. fluff @soobnny

another AMAZING seungmin fic (you're the best seungmin writer on here), i remember reading it and thinking this is pure poetry

in between | jeongin x reader. angst. fluff. mutual pining. @inniejeonginnie

the perfect combination of angst and fluff that makes you want to reach inside your phone to make the characters CONFESS

what I'm looking for | seungmin x reader. strangers to lovers. hidden identity (escaping from a marriage). fluff. hurt/comfort. @rachalixie

reading this felt like finding shelter on a stormy day. i loved it so much. seungmin brainrot that's all i have to say.

butterfly bandage | bang chan x reader. uni au. fluff. angst. smut. @subskz

one of the best written pieces I've ever read, truly. this series amazes me and i don't want it to end. so so beautifully written.

the enemies to lovers project | minho x reader. enemies to lovers. uni au. slight angst. fluff. @softukiyos

I LOVED THIS SMM. the progress of their relationship felt so real and the idea is so original too. such a delight to read.

bunny | neighbor minho x reader. strangers to lovers. angst. fluff. smut. @tasteleeknow

such a comforting read!!! i loved the way minho was portrayed as the gentlest man to exist. which he is!!!!!

everything and no one | minho x reader. maidservant!reader x prince!minho. forbidden love. smut. @tasteleeknow

one of my favorite written pieces as well. the soap detail really stuck with me and the progress was so beautiful, wish i could read it for the first time again.

red | chan x reader. fluff. angst with a happy ending. @rachalixie

this was a poetic trip through Taylor's song red. loved LOVED the way it was written and the symbolic of the color red.

i didn't accidentally love you | hyunjin x reader. fluff. uni au. @amelee23

poetry club and poetic writing. one of the cutest hyunjin fics ever that made me giggle so hard.

[luvstaymin]

[stray kids recommendations]

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last updated: 7/17/2024

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(a)-angst + (f)-fluff + (s)-smut + (sg)-suggestive

(h/c)-hurt/comfort

☆-personal favorite

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* ੈ✩‧₊˚+++ [bang chan] +++

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┗━ (s) bad idea! (10.2k)

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┗━ (a) if you don't know (1.7k)

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┗━ (a + h/c) lover of mine (3k)

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┗━ (f + s) my house (i) (13k) + three steps back (ii) (5.8k) <office au>

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┗━ (s) sweet (4.1k) <brother's best friend au>

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┗━ (a + f) us first (3.1k)

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* ੈ✩‧₊˚+++ [lee minho] +++

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* ੈ✩‧₊˚+++ [seo changbin] +++

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* ੈ✩‧₊˚+++ [hwang hyunjin] +++

┗━ (f + s) cherry chapstick (8.9k) <best friends-to-lovers au>

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* ੈ✩‧₊˚+++ [han jisung] +++

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* ੈ✩‧₊˚+++ [lee felix] +++

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* ੈ✩‧₊˚+++ [kim seungmin] +++

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┗━ (a + f) eighteen (19.8k) <best friends-to-lovers au + university au> ☆

┗━ (s) home run (14.2k) <brother's best friend au>

┗━ (a + f) loving him (4.3k) <best friends-to-lovers au>

┗━ (f + s) no nut november (5.6k)

┗━ (a + f) prime (7.5k) <superhero au>

┗━ (a + f) take a shot (19.4k) <enemies-to-lovers au>

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* ੈ✩‧₊˚+++ [yang jeongin] +++

┗━ (a + f + s) better and better (10.9k) <best friends-to-lovers au>

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* ੈ✩‧₊˚+++ [ot8] +++

┗━ (h/c) scarred knees and insecurities (2.7k) <idol au - 9th member>

┗━ (a + h/c) you're awake! (3.2k) <idol au - 9th member>

[desi2go]

𝑴𝒂𝒔𝒕𝒆𝒓𝒍𝒊𝒔𝒕

𝕊𝕥𝕣𝕒𝕪 𝕂𝕚𝕕𝕤

𝑩𝒂𝒏𝒈 𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒏

Lonely Night pt. 1 ⎢ pt. 2 Idol Chan x reader warnings: angst, fluff

Dancing through the night Idol Chan x reader warnings: fluff

Head Nuzzles warnings: fluff

Date on ice warnings: fluff

Importance dad Chan x mother reader warnings: angst, fluff summary: Having a child with an idol wasn't easy...

Prince and Princess pt. 1 ⎢ pt. 2 Prince Chan x princess reader warnings: forced marriage, royalty au, strangers to lovers, angst summary: When your parents engaged you with the prince of the neighbouring country, you flee. On your way you meet a handsome man...

Period cramps werewolf Chan x reader warnings: fluff

Somnia warning: fluff

First times warnings: fluff

𝑳𝒆𝒆 𝑲𝒏𝒐𝒘

Case 143 pt. 1 ⎢ pt. 2 ⎢ pt. 3 warnings: werewolf au / soulmate au, fluff, angst

Moonlight werewolf Minho x vampire reader warnings: fluff

Sleep deprived Idol Minho x reader warnings: fluff

One photoshoot away from love Minho x Idol reader warnings: fluff

First Times warnings: fluff

𝑪𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒈𝒃𝒊𝒏

Fluffy mornings warnings: fluff

Princess Changbin x mother reader warnings: fluff

Beneath the city lights mafia Changbin x reader warnings: angst with a happy ending, weapons, blood, death

𝑯𝒚𝒖𝒏𝒋𝒊𝒏

Sick days sick Hyunjin x reader warnings: fluff

A tiny bee warnings: fluff

Royal Kiss Hyunjin x model reader warnings: fluff

Beneath the Surface: Love in the Shadows of Duty Hyunjin x assitant / manager reader warnings: angst with happy end

𝑱𝒊𝒔𝒖𝒏𝒈

All in student Jisung x reader warnings: fluff, college au

Humming dad Jisung x mother reader warnings: fluff

About the night two months ago warnings: best friends to lovers, unplanned pregnancy, angst, comfort and fluff summary: You didn't plan on getting pregnant and not from a one-night-stand. And most definitely not from your best friend. Yet, here you are, pregnant, without a plan how your life will go on and how you will tell Jisung.

Under the wide sky warnings: fluff

𝑭𝒆𝒍𝒊𝒙

Game night Idol Felix x reader warnings: fluff

Lifting your bump Felix x pregnant reader warnings: fluff

Artemis werewolf Felix x huntress reader warnings: slight angst, fluff, blood and weapons summary: You were a huntress, trained by the Artemis' nymphs to hunt werewolves. However, you weren't prepared to find your mate this way.

First little crush warnings: fluff

��𝒆𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒎𝒊𝒏

Flowers from the prince pt. 1 ⎢ pt. 2 prince Seungmin x guard reader warnings: fluff, forbidden romance, angst, blood, injuries summary: After working as a soldier at the border, you were finally transferred to the palace. You should protect the prince from everything that could be a harm...

Chaotic duo warnings: best friends to lovers, fluff

𝑱𝒆𝒐𝒏𝒈𝒊𝒏

A pirate and the sea pirate Jeongin x reader warnings: death, angst, fluff summary: You were the daughter of a sailesman and after your father's death , you were held captive by pirates. Luckily, you meet a young pirate that will change your life forever.

Goodbye, Jeongin warnings: angst, cheating

𝒐𝒕𝟖

Realzing they fell in love warnings: fluff

What do the perfect dates look like? warnings: fluff

Proposing to you Hyung line ⎢ Maknae line Warnings fluff

Jealousy, Jealousy Hyung line ⎢ Maknae line

𝒔𝒆𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒔

First Times Chan ⎢ Lee Know ⎢ Changbin ⎢ Hyunjin ⎢ Jisung ⎢ Felix ⎢ Seungmin ⎢ Jeongin

𝔸𝕥𝕖𝕖𝕫

𝑯𝒐𝒏𝒈𝒋𝒐𝒐𝒏g

Stealing the fate prince Hongjoong x lady of the court reader warnings: smut, angst, fluff, arranged marriage

𝑺𝒂𝒏

Love a cowboy cowboy San x reader mostly fluff, some angst summary: You moved from the city into the wild west. On a bull riding competition, you meet San, a cowboy, not knowing that in the future you will cross ways with him more often...