#seungmin fics

[portalhan]

꒰ ◌ ◞ ◟ ꒱ it's a date !

pairing: kim seungmin x gn!reader

featuring: felix lee, one mention of hyunjin

synopsis: felix has a scheduling blunder and can no longer make it to his blind date. so his best friend, seungmin, poses as felix for the night.

format: one shot

themes: fluff, romance, meet-cute, vague college au

warnings: light cussing, mentions of food/a meal

word count: 2.7k

fae's notes: finally!!! a seungmin fic!!! i wanted to save a sweet story for seungmin because he's a sweet dude. ٩̋(ˊ•͈ ꇴ •͈ˋ)و this was so fun to write! made me giggle a bit lol.... anyways enjoy enjoy enjoy! tell me what you thought about this in the tags of your reblogs or in the comments or in the actual reblog! love u all deeply

seungmin was lazing in bed – as he usually does – when felix rang him up out of the blue. he stares at the caller id for a while; he knows felix hates calling people. it must be serious.

"what's up?" he drawls into his handphone as soon as he taps the green button, propping himself to sit up against the headboard. the sight of seungmin in this state is a rich tapestry – hair in a ruffled mess, blankets bunched up against a lower corner of the bed, puffy eyes masked by thick glasses. he was still only half awake as he waits for felix to speak.

"it's an emergency," felix exhales into the phone, voice slightly nervous. "what is it?" seungmin mumbles, which earns him an apprehensive hum from his friend. seungmin lightly snaps at him to spit it out, and the boy on the other end of the line goes, "i... kind of fucked up my schedule today," felix says defeatedly. "it's my fault. i have that blind date my aunt set up for me tonight... but i didn't realise it would be on the same day as the launch of hyunjin's new art gallery. i promised him i would be there like months ago. and the date is tonight too."

seungmin hums softly in acknowledgement, prompting his best friend to continue with his story. "i've been putting my aunt's set ups off for too long, i can't afford to miss this one. not to mention the fact that it's such a last minute development, i'd feel horrible if i just stood them up like that..." he drones to himself, trailing off slightly. the line is silent for a split second, before seungmin hears felix utter an incoherent noise of enlightenment. "seungmin. this might be a little... weird, but promise you'll hear me out. okay?"

"does it matter if i say no?" seungmin satirically grumbles in response, only to be met with a bemused felix's voice. the former has a passing thought about how he could absolutely picture his best friend's facial expressions right now, based solely on the way he's speaking . "no!" felix excitedly squeals into the phone, prompting seungmin to pull the device away from his ear for a quick moment while grimacing. "do you think you could go in my place? just for this one date? you'd be perfect – you already know everything about me. are you doing anything tonight?"

much to his own surprise, seungmin actually found himself feeling pretty impartial about the idea – it wasn't like he had anything better to do for the rest of the day, anyway. plus, it would be fun to pose as his best friend for about two hours to a total stranger. but he knew he had to negotiate his terms first. "and i won't have to do it again after? what's in it for me?" he smugly asks.

"you won't, i promise," felix pauses to think, before seungmin hears a faint snap in the background. "oh, i know; i'll go to lectures on your behalf for two whole weeks."

"done. text me the details."

⋆ ࣪.  ⁺⑅ ⋰˚ *.ﾟ .˳⁺⁎˚ ˚⁎⁺˳ . ༺ ˖࣪ ˖࣪ ∗

your mom has been trying her hardest to find a "decent suitor" for you lately. you don't know what triggered this entirely new behaviour; it's not like you haven't dated before, nor were you particularly old or anything (unless your 20s are considered old now?). although, the last time you did date, you were a high school freshman. you guess you could see why your very old-fashioned mother felt the need to step in.

like felix, you've been pushing back against your mom's incessant offers to meet sons of friends and "cute" cashiers at retail stores as much as you could. it went on for months, but unfortunately, she just couldn't be held back any longer. "y/n, just try it out. just this once. you don't have to contact him again after one date if you don't like him," your mother coaxes, while simultaneously refusing to provide you with any clear indication of what he's like for some reason. all the information she has given you about the blind date can be counted on one hand: his name is felix, he's your age and he's from sydney. she says it's "more fun when it's a mystery", but you respectfully disagree. "just trust me – i know you, and i know you'll have a great time. just once," she squeezes your arm.

you groan/laugh playfully in her grasp and slump slightly as your body deflates a little in defeat. "fine," you say, hints of reluctance in your voice. "tonight, 7pm at your favourite restaurant. table's already booked under your name," she begins to blurt out as she scrambles for spare paper nearby. she already locked the date in before you even agreed? you wish you could say you were surprised. your mom hastily scrawls the details on some post-it and hands it over. "tell me how it goes, okay?"

that's how you found yourself here, sitting in a booth in the middle of the dimly-lit restaurant, constantly checking your phone for the time. it's been about 10 minutes after the agreed-upon time, and your blind date is nowhere in sight. how rude, you think to yourself. you pick up the menu off the table to scan it for the 30th time, not long before a vague figure suddenly loomed over your table. he clears his throat to signal his presence.

you slowly peek out from behind the leather binder, only to find a soft-looking, brown-haired man with a shy smile. "are you... y/n?" he asks, head tilting ever so slightly. you shoot up from your seat to bow out of courtesy. "yes! you must be felix?" you ask as you both took your seats. he hesitates for a beat, before re-focusing and confirming it with a firm nod. "you look pretty," he blurts out after a brief beat of silence.

seungmin meant it – he didn't come here with any expectations for the date. he just saw it as doing his greatest friend a kind favour; an errand, even. but the moment he laid eyes on you when he walked with, with your brows furrowed as you were browsing the menu, he was already awestricken. he stood at the restaurant's entrance to collect himself, and also to take the sight of you in. the way stray locks of your hair fell over your face; the way the outfit you've chose oozed with your personal style. he tidied his appearance up a bit and gave himself a little mental pat on the back before he approached you.

you were taken slightly aback by seungmin's bluntness. you weren't used to being flirted with right off the bat, especially since you haven't been on dates in so long – but for some reason, you liked it when it came from seungmin felix. he observed your puzzled expression as you were processing what he said, and began to panic. did he cross a line? "i'm sorry, i didn't mean to make you feel uncomfortable, i just-" he stutters, eyes darting everywhere but yours just to avert your gaze. you immediately shake your hands to cut him off. "n-no! it's not like that," you exclaim. "i just haven't been on a date in a while, so i wasn't used to it. a romantic one, that is."

seungmin saw the opportunity to ease yourselves into casual conversation and grabbed it. he smirked slightly, leaning back against his chair with his arms crossed against his chest. "as in... you go on non-romantic dates?" he teases you, chuckling as he watches your visible bewilderment. you looked adorable when you're this flustered, he thought to himself. you stumble over your own words as you try to explain yourself, and your brain just clogged itself with the sentence 'why did i say that?' and its adjacents. seungmin just giggles even harder, but quickly puts you at ease. "i'm kidding," he waves away in a gesture. "it's all good."

you then discuss what you were each planning to eat and promptly place your order. as you waited for your food to arrive, you and seungmin – or felix, as you know him – just begin chatting and getting to know one another in the meantime. "so, felix, what was your favourite childhood tv show?" you asked him at some point.

"do you ask every guy you meet this same question?"

"no, just you. you look like a very interesting man."

"as do you," seungmin says with faux posh cadence. "it's oggy and the cockroaches."

you whistle softly, impressed. "that's a deep cut. mine's a classic – spongebob." seungmin quips in response, muttering something about how it's not classic, just basic.

everything between you that came after just flowed naturally; to both you and seungmin, your presences felt like nothing more than an overdue catch-up with an old friend. you mentally scowled to yourself the moment it occurred to you that you were actually enjoying your date with seungmin felix – that meant your mother was right. you shudder at the thought; she is never going to live this down.

seungmin, on the other hand, felt the chemistry too, but at the back of his mind, he knew it was – in a lot of ways – manufactured. the persona you were really getting to know was mostly felix's – all the information about himself he divulged to you tonight were just simplified recounts of felix's own stories. although he did have to admit that you were really hitting it off on the conversational and humorous side of things – seungmin indulges himself in that small sliver of hope, at least.

as the conversation carried on well after your food was served and subsequently scarfed down, he found himself feeling guilty about lying to you to such an extent. sure, it couldn't be helped on his end – it was at the behest of felix, after all. seeking to let you get to know the real seungmin, he gradually began injecting inconspicuous details of his actual personality into his regurgitation of felix's to soothe his own guilt. the more he got to know you, the more he felt infatuated with you – not only were you incredibly pretty, you were also immensely talented, genuine and kind too. seungmin had to constantly process your existence in his head; it was like god personally made you, and yet here you were, sitting across from him.

the chat didn't exacty end once dinner was over, unlike how the both of you had anticipated the date would go. finding yourselves extremely reluctant to say goodbye, the both of you agreed to grab some ice cream and have a walk at the nearby park. as the hours spent together passed, the more drawn the both of you were to each other. everything was right in those few hours; like that satisfying feeling when the final jigsaw puzzle piece falls into place. neither you nor seungmin were particularly spiritual, but you did consider this situation you've found yourselves in too good to be for it to not be the divine work of fate.

as the night came to a close, seungmin insisted on walking you home, despite the many failed attempts at convincing him you didn't want to trouble him ("you only live like, 10 minutes from here. let me walk you back home," he pouted. how could you say no to those puppy eyes?). he took the extra time he had left with you to pluck up the courage to tell you the truth – he liked you too much to keep lying to you.

in the middle of your stroll back to your apartment, seungmin abruptly stopped in his tracks. here it goes – he was about to take the leap and tell you the truth. you were already a few steps in front of him before you realised he was no longer beside you. you turn back to look at him, confusion written on your face as though it were an open book. "felix? everything okay?" you question, concerned.

seungmin closes his eyes and takes a deep breath. he can do this. "i'm... not felix."

"what do you mean? as in felix is an alias?"

"no," he holds his breath in anticipation of a violent reaction once he says the next sentence. "i'm not felix at all. i'm just here to take his place today."

you kind of just stand there and blink a handful of times, silently processing what he just said. the boy's voice cuts through the brief silence. "i'm seungmin, his best friend. he had a scheduling conflict and didn't want to stand you up last minute so... here i am," he extends his arms out to gesture to himself. on the surface, seungmin appeared calm and collected. unfortunately, the same cannot be said about the thoughts running through his head right now. he's straight up panicking: 'will they hate me?', 'oh god, i just fucked up so bad.', 'why did i even decide to do this in the first place?'

you stand there on the sidewalk for an additional couple of moments more as you analyse your own emotions. are you... mad? disappointed? confused? do you hate feli- you mean, seungmin, for this? it seemed as though these were the set of emotions objectively warranted in a situation like this. he did lie to you and pretend to be someone else the entire time you were with him, feels a bit like a red flag to forgive a liar like that so easily.

"everything you just told me about yourself... was that really felix? or were you talking about yourself the entire time?"

"maybe... about 80% of it was about felix. i just made a promise to him to keep up the pretence, but i think i came to like you so much that i couldn't bear to continue lying to you."

you knew you were letting your emotions cloud your judgement in that moment, but he looked so visibly worried and remorseful about lying to you that you felt your heart melt a little bit at the mere sight. he abruptly blurted out before you could say anything, "i'm sorry. you must be mad. you have every right to be." he gulps before continuing. "but i like you. a lot."

you want to start talking, but you could see that seungmin still had more to say. he was now even more nervous than before due to your prolonged silence. your expression was incredibly inscrutable, so he somehow managed to convince himself that you must hate him. but he's stubborn enough to continue with his tangent in a desperate attempt to win you over: "we're the same age too, and i'm in college studying music theory. i like singing, playing the piano, baseball... oh, and i like pochacco, my friends say i look like him," he rambles, stuttering along the way.

you suddenly burst in a fit of giggles. you couldn't help yourself; seungmin was adorable after all. "i'm actually – and weirdly – not mad at you," you tell him, beaming. "i like you too. a lot. and i think you're cute." you gesture for him to come along, and you two continue your journey home. seungmin's hands were shoved into his pockets, gaze fixated on his feet as you two approached your front door. feeling flustered and unadmittedly giddy from the compliment a few minutes ago, seungmin awkwardly splutters in response, "as do i."

"so you think you're cute too?" you scratch your head slightly. seungmin's heart leaps in his chest over how cute that little gesture was, as you both paused in front of the door.

"no, i mean i-"

"you are."

seungmin blushes, hard. you couldn't contain your grin as you watched his cheeks redden beneath the faint porch light. "are you free this weekend? we can have a proper date then. as y/n and seungmin this time," he asks softly, voice so gentle it sounded almost like a whisper. you notice him slowly, warily closing the gap between your figures, his gaze continuously flitting between your eyes and your lips. it was as though he was too timid; afraid and anxious about the dangerous possibility of you giving him a tight slap and calling him a dick for lying to you this entire time.

impatient and unable to resist the urge anymore, you swiftly close the gap and press your lips against seungmin's. you could feel him pull back ever so slightly from the surprise, but the second he finally registered what was happening, he wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you in to fervently kiss you back. after a few glorious seconds, you hastily pulled away, giggling and planting a kiss on his cheek.

"it's a date."

☆ 🖇️ 𖥻 ＜꒱ portalhan's navigation | m.list | ask me anything! ☆ 🖇️ 𖥻 ＜꒱

[ujimoo]

For Tonight, For The Weekend, Forever. | KSM

synopsis: going home for your childhood friend's wedding was the easy part, however, facing him was something else entirely.

pairings: seungmin x fem!reader, jisung x OC, chan x OC.

includes: past love, first love, angst, best friend!Jisung, weekend romance, heartbreak, second-chance romance.

WARNING: mention of mature themes, suggestive - implied sex, but no actual smut. mature jokes (one death joke, sex jokes), drinking, mentions of eating and multiple restaurant 'eating scenes', maybe more i’ve missed - let me know if i have

word count: 24,976

a.n. Here it is! My longest fic I have ever written for tumblr. As I said in the teaser, this original idea comes from the song Tis The Damn Season by Taylor Swift, however, as you can tell, it's changed a lot since the original idea. ALSO, I just want to say a massive thank you to Galaxy from @plutominho for being my best friend, the greatest editor, the best person to brainstorm with and for being my number one supporter, I love you so much more than I could possibly describe. Thank you for putting up with me when it came to writing this fic and thank you for putting up with me in general haha.

a.a.n. parts in all italics are flashbacks!!

permanent tag list: @awooghan​ @soobin-chois @curlytxe @treetops68 @minniee-bear 

tag list: @smally97 @blueleventprint @heeverseblog​

It’s the sounds of typing coming from your best friend Gwen’s laptop that keep you awake– barely. Looking down at the book that was led out on the desk in front of you, you sigh. Your brain feels numb and everything you read leaves your mind the moment you look away. 

It doesn’t help that the library you’re currently sitting in was eerily quiet. Sure, it was late and many other students had given up on studying at this point and you couldn’t blame them, but at the same time. It was almost too quiet. 

“Did you get the invite to the wedding?” Gwen’s voice causes you to jump out of your skin. The sound of Gwen’s bubblegum-like voice definitely wakes you up. 

Rubbing your eyes with the back of your hands, you question her. “Get what?” 

“The invite,” Gwen says slowly. “To Mina and Chan’s wedding.” 

Shrugging and pushing the book away from you. You lean back against your seat. 

“I don’t know,” you starts. “Maybe, I haven’t checked my mail in a few days.” 

Glancing over at Gwen, who smiles a small smile, you copy her.

“Well make sure to check, Mina will kill you if you don’t go,” Gwen laughs. 

You nod your head as you begin to shove your now discarded books into your bag. It was late and you had had enough of trying to study now.

“Yeah yeah, I know, I’ll check,” you hum. “Also, make sure not to stay here too late. At least get that Dofus you call a boyfriend-...” 

Gwen quickly cuts you off,  “not my boyfriend.”

This was enough to cause you to mentally face-palm. Shaking your head, you put your backpack over your shoulders. 

“Either way, don’t walk home alone in the dark.” 

“Yeah yeah,” Gwen says. “Just make sure to catch up on sleep okay? And actually, eat something good for once!” 

You don’t look back at your best friend, but raise a hand to signal that you had in fact heard her last words and made your way back to your apartment. 

Your apartment was small and outdated. The air was dry, yet somehow, you were sure there was mould growing in the corner of your living room and whilst you knew you should call your landlord, you just couldn’t be bothered. 

Not long now, you thought to yourself. 

It wasn’t long until you could move out and move on from the place for good. It wasn’t long until you could get a better one, maybe one closer to home. Somewhere where the rent wasn’t as hefty. 

Somewhere that actually kept the warmth in. 

Letting your bag drop onto the small couch and you ran a hand through your hair. It wasn’t until a moment later that you remembered about having to check your mailbox. You didn’t want to, maybe you could make up some excuse that you forgot or that you misplaced your mailbox key, but you knew Gwen wouldn't stand for it. 

“Shit,” you mumble, grabbing your keys once more and heading back out the door. 

Thankfully, you only lived on the first floor, so it wasn’t that much of a journey down to the postroom. 

The main entrance and the postroom were completely different to the rest of the building. They were in pristine condition compared to literally everywhere else. As if the main entrance was to lure you in. That’s how it happened to you at least, with promises of how the rest of the building would one day look like the polished main entrance. 

Promises that were never kept.

 Going over to your personal mailbox, you take the key and unlock it. There wasn’t much in there like you normally assumed. The usual; bills, junk mail, more bills. However, wedged between two letters was the card you had been looking for. 

A white card sprayed with gold edges. It was definitely it. 

Delicately turning it around and you smile lightly at the fancy lettering. This was definitely the type of invite one Kim Mina would send.  

‘You are invited to the wedding of Kim Mina and Bang Chan’. 

Closing your mailbox and quickly locking it back up. You make your way back up to your apartment. Carefully placing the invite onto your mantel above your non-working fireplace and stare at it for a moment. 

Then the moment passes and you grab your backpack once more and head straight for your bedroom. There was a lot to think about when it came to the wedding, the most notable being who would be in attendance. That thought was something you didn’t want, so for now, you’d ignore it– until you couldn’t anymore.

→→

The second time Gwen asks about the invite, you’re both walking between classes. Whilst you weren’t the same majors, you were lucky enough to finish classes at the same time. So, that’s what you would do every Wednesday since you both started that year of university:

You’d finish class at the same time, meet at the main entrance to the building, Gwen would walk with you to your next class and then Gwen would wait around for her boyfriend, that isn’t her boyfriend– long story– jisung to meet her after his own class finished at 5 pm. 

“So did you get the invite or not?” Gwen asks. “You never said anything about it last time.” 

Pulling your bag straps closer to the middle of your chest, you hum in response. “Oh yeah, I got it.” 

Gwen makes a face, basically telling you to continue, but you decide to stay silent.

“And?!” Gwen gasps. “You’re going to have to respond soon, Mina will be pissed if you don’t go, you know this.” 

“I know!” you whine. “It’s just, I know I’ll see him.” 

“And?” Gwen repeats. “This is our best friend since childhood’s wedding. Don’t let her dumb brother make you miss out on something like that and anyway,” Gwen gulps. “I’d be more scared of Mina’s wrath of you missing her wedding than of you having to face him for like four days.” 

You sink into yourself at the thought of it, “true.”

Seeing him was one thing, but Mina’s wrath was a whole other thing entirely. The one way to describe that of Kim Mina and that was the devil in human form. Sure, she was the kindest person you and Gwen had ever met. Mina would do anything for anyone she cared about, however, Mina was blunt. She was more than blunt, she was ruthless and said things how she saw them. She couldn’t sugarcoat things just to sugarcoat, but that’s what made her words mean so much more. 

All the Kim siblings were one and the same, like carbon copies of each other. Mina, her twin brother and their younger brother, Seungmin. Aka the man you didn’t want to see.

“If you really don’t want to go, then you don’t have to.” Gwen pats you on the shoulder. “But remember what I said, don’t let him be the reason for missing out on something like this. She’s only ever going to have one wedding.”

Stopping outside of the building of your next class. You nod your head. 

 “You’re right– and don’t say I told you so,” you quickly add when you see the look of mischief on Gwen’s face. “I’ll tell her I’m going tonight when I get home.” 

“Good,” Gwen smiles. “You can drive down with me and Ji.” 

You instantly let out a groan as you lean your head back., “And listen to you flirt fight or whatever the heck it is you do for like six hours?” 

“We do not do that!” Gwen rolls her eyes. “And hey, it’s up to you, I was just thinking it would save you gas money…” 

you give in instantly. Screw gas prices and their ways of rising prices. Can’t they just think of students for once?

“Fine! But I swear to God if you guys flirt the whole way I’m going to scream.” 

Gwen pushes you in the direction of the doors and repeats herself. “We don’t and we won’t!” 

you found it hard to believe her, but you decide that it was easier just to give in.

→→

By the time you got home, it was dark and you felt sticky and damp. With the changing of the weather, you had begun to dress more warmly in the morning only for you to be sweating your ass off by the time midday rolled around. To be fair, you did this every year, but still, you never learnt. 

The feeling of having to go up one flight of stairs was enough to make you feel mad.  Pulling off your hat, your frizzy hair springs up at the lack of force smothering it down. Shoving it into your bag, you put your keys in between your lips for a minute as you struggle to take off your scarf and shove that in there too. 

Taking your keys from your lips and rushing towards your door, and unlock it. Stripping off your coat in record time, you let that and your bag fall to the floor. As you stumble to the bathroom, you take off your trousers and let them trail behind you. Flicking the light on, you head straight for your shower, turn it on and as you wait for it to heat up, you go to your bedroom to get yourself a set of pyjamas for after your much-needed shower. 

The shower was nice, it was everything you needed after the day you had. You were thankful that you were able to wash away your worries about the wedding and how you were able to reminisce on the words Gwen had told you and you were even able to practice what you were going to say when you would inevitably call Mina later that night. 

You turn off the shower and step out, shivering at the cold as you wrap yourself up in your towel. You dry yourself, putting on some underwear and your pyjamas. Not bothering with anything like body cream, you make your way back through the hallway, picking up your discarded trouser, your coat as well as your bag. Hanning up your coat, and resting your bag on the couch, you threw your dirty trouser into the washing basket before going back to dig your phone out of the depths of your bag. 

Scrolling through the notifications on the lock screen, you ignore the notifications that were from useless apps you even forgot you had, like random tweet alerts from Twitter, video notifications from youtube and focused more on your text message alerts. 

There was a string of texts from a group chat you have with Gwen and jisung and you make sure to click on that one first. 

Wannabe Spiderman: 4:55 pm 

Gwen told me ur riding with us to the wedding… sick! 

Princess Gwen<3: 4:56 pm 

Never say that again, you’re such a dork. 

Wannabe Spiderman: 4:56 pm

U hurt my feelings, that is so not sick! 

Princess Gwen<3: 4:57 pm

I hate you omg

Giggling away at Gwen and Jisung’s exchanges, you type out your own message before quickly hitting send. 

y/nnie stupid: 6:02 pm

Weren’t you guys together at this point? 

Also, who changed my nickname? 

Princess Gwen<3: 6:03 pm

Yes, and who do you think? 

y/nnie stupid: 6:04 pm

The dofus?

Princess Gwen<3: 6:04 pm

DING DING DING! WE HAVE A WINNER! 

Wannabe Spiderman: 6:06 pm

I feel like u guys just like ganging up on me

Just say ur jealous of my great nicknaming skills and go

y/nnie stupid: 6:07 pm

Sure we are, sooo jealous. 

Wannabe Spiderman: 6:08 pm

BULLIES ! all of you !

Rolling your eyes and laughing at jisung’s texts and you back out of the message chain before clicking into a private one between you and Gwen. 

Gwen<3: 6:02 pm

I know you’re worried about this whole wedding thing and having to see ******** again, but it’ll be okay. I’ll fight him for you and you know Mina wouldn’t want anything bad to happen either. 

y/nnie<3: 6:09 pm

Did you really censor his name? 

Gwen<3: 6:10 pm

Of course, I did. He makes you upset so he must not be named in our sacred texts. 

y/nnie<3: 6:10 pm

Lol, i love you

Gwen<3: 6:11 pm

Love you too<3 

But, for real, the wedding will be okay, you won’t even have to leave my side if it makes you feel better. I have my own room at the hotel, we can just share so you won’t have to be alone?

y/nnie<3: 6:13 pm

Okay, would love that. I need to call Mina before it gets too late, but I’ll tell you how it goes at some point later. 

Try not to kill sung when I’m gone.

Gwen<3: 6:15 pm

Yeah, you must! 

And no promises<3 

Closing the app, you soon pull up Mina’s contact and let your thumb hover over the call button. 

It was now or never. You had to, you couldn’t push this off any longer even if you wanted to– which if you could, you probably would. 

Clicking call, you hold it up to your ear as you bite at the skin around your thumbnail on your other hand in anticipation. It felt like the ringing tone was mocking you– if it could even mock you? You weren’t so sure anymore. 

The call clicked through and the bright voice of Mina rang through your speakers and into your ears. 

“y/nnie!” Mina exclaims. “How are you?” 

  Humming, you smile as you respond,. “I’m good, how are you?” 

“Good, I’m good too.” 

you can practically hear Mina smiling through the phone and you’re is inclined to try and match it. 

“So, what are you calling for?” Mina asks. 

you quickly respond, “about the wedding!” 

“Ah, great! Calling to say you’re coming right? Cause I already have you set down as so.” 

you laugh and attempt to nod your head before realising Mina couldn’t see you. You knew Mina would do this, you knew that she knew you would go regardless of how you felt. 

“Yes yes, I’m coming so don’t think otherwise.” 

“Good,” Mina hums. “I was worried for a second there when you hadn’t responded to the invite that you weren’t going to.” 

“No, I’m coming.” 

“You better, I’ll hunt you down otherwise,” Mina adds before letting out a laugh. 

“Yeah, I know you would.” you laugh too. “And good for me, I am going so no need to get the hunting tools out.” 

You can hear movement in the background and Mina soon turns her attention back to your conversation. 

“I gotta go y/nnie, I’m sorry, Chan is going to be back soon and I’m in the middle of preparing dinner.” 

“Okay,” you respond quickly. “I need to do some food too.” 

“Yeah, you do,” Mina states. “And make sure it’s something other than ramen this time around.” 

Rolling your eyes, you hum, however, you couldn’t fight her because she wasn’t wrong. “Yes, mother.” 

Sharing a laugh, you both quickly say your goodbyes and end the call. You were actually starting to get hungry. Mina mentioning food had made you realise it and thankfully you had actually gone shopping for once, a few days beforehand. So, you definitely had something other than ramen that night. 

→→

You weren’t sure how you ended up aimlessly wandering around at some house party. Gwen had dragged both you and Jisung there as a way to 'celebrate' the that it was the beginning of the final year, but she promptly went off somewhere leaving you and Jisung alone. That was until jisung saw something or someone and disappeared without you even knowing. 

Sure parties were fun, and you liked a good party now and then, but as you stood idly, on the front porch, hoping to catch a glimpse of either of your best friends, the party had lost its spark. 

The air was still cold and your knitted jumper did just a good enough job of shielding you from it, but even with your sweater paws, every now and then a shiver would run down your spine. You wondered if it would be a good time to walk home. Sure you knew, that it was dark and it was a dumb and dangerous idea to walk by yourself, especially without informing your two best friends, but even after an hour at least, you still hadn't found them. 

It was boring, you were bored. You just wanted to go home and find something to watch and prayed that you kept yourself warm enough so you didn't catch a cold. 

"You alright?" You jump at the sudden voice next to you and turn around to see Seungmin with a concerned look on his face. 

You knew Seungmin– well knew him a bit, you had had classes together all throughout high school, but something in you changed within the last year that made you look at him differently. You weren't sure what it was exactly, but something about him made your heart flutter. 

"I'm okay," you smile. "I lost my friends, I thinking of heading home." You laugh at your words. 

"On your own?" He asks and you nod in response. "But it's dangerous, what if something happens?" 

"Eh," you push your lips into a thin line. "What's the worst that could happen?" 

"A lot of things?" He responds to your rhetorical question.

Turning your body to face him, you smile. "I'll be fine, plus if you're worried so much you could always walk me back?" 

Seungmin blinks and the sides of his mouth lift into a smile, one that makes your own even wider. You shocked yourself at your own confidence, but what surprised you more was the fact he agreed. 

"Okay," he hums. "I'll walk with you." 

"You sure?" You ask, pointing casually at the front door. "Not worried about leaving the party so soon?" 

He shakes his head and motions for you to lead the way. "Nah, the party doesn't seem to compare now." 

The walk back with him was an experience like no other and Seungmin is almost charming, showering you with compliments. Saying how the walk back with you is more fun than he's had in the past hour and a half he had been back at the party. 

So when you slow down and stop outside of your house, it's sad. You didn't want to part ways with him just yet, this was the most you had spoken to him in one go, and you didn't want it to end so early. 

Turning to him once again, you smile. "Thank you for walking back with me." 

"Thank you for your company," he smiles. 

Looking up at him, your smile doesn't leave your face and his own seemed to mimic yours. 

You couldn't tell how long you had both been standing there, looking at each other, but just like the walk, you didn't want it to end. He steps forward, leaning his face closer ever so slightly and whispers. "Can I say goodnight?" 

Butterflies erupt in your chest as you question, "In what way?." 

“A special way, with your consent of course,” he responds.

He doesn’t wait for you to finish nodding.

Your first kiss with Seungmin is short and sweet and you can taste a hint of cola on his lips. 

It didn’t matter that you had nothing to compare it to, but something in your heart knew that you'd never want to kiss anyone else if it wasn't Seungmin's lips on yours.

→→

Wannabe Spiderman: 10:05 am

We’re on our way now bishh

Gwen is yelling at me already, so pls be ready :D 

y/nnie stupid: 10:06 am

I’m ready and honestly, you probably deserve it

Wannabe Spiderman: 10:06 am

What is it with u guys and bullying me…

y/nnie stupid: 10:07 am

Love u too<3

Princess Gwen<3: 10:09 am

WTF I DIDNT YELL AT YOU YOU LIAR 

y/nnie stupid: 10:09 am

Focus on the road?!?!!!

Wannabe Spiderman: 10:10 am

She was at a stoplight

And she did btw

y/nnie SHE JUST HIT ME

SHE DID IT AGAIN

y/nnie stupid: 10:12 am

Please don’t kill each other before we’ve even left, thanks<3

You finish typing out the text, hit send and roll your eyes as you lock your phone before slipping it into the pocket of your coat. Grabbing the small suitcase you packed basically the night before, you open and hold the door open with your foot as you try to wrangle your way out. Succeeding, you let out a huff and begin to roll the suitcase to the stairs and quickly make your way to ground level and out onto the main road. 

By the time it took you to get outside, Gwen was already parked up with the trunk of her car open. She’s leant over it, clearing the bags back up so there’s a space for your stuff

“Where’s the dofus?” you laugh, your suitcase coming to a stop beside your feet. 

Rolling her eyes, Gwen motions to the space in the trunk for your suitcase. “I sent him down the street for coffee. I need it, especially for this trip.” 

Lifting up your suitcase, you attempt to slot it into the free place and your mind begins to wander. It had been a month since you had originally called Mina to tell her that you would be attending her wedding and for the first week since then, you genuinely felt okay, you felt good– really good. However, the past few days had been different. It was like all of your anxieties were inside of you waiting to escape– just like a shaken-up coke can. 

Your hands go up to close the trunk, however, it slips from your fingers and slams shut. This causes you to jump in surprise. Standing there, staring at the girl with a concerned look, Gwen tilts her head slightly. 

“You good, y/nnie?” she asks.

You quickly nod, your thoughts coming back to you. “Yeah, yeah, I’m fine.” 

Gwen continues to look at you but decides to move on for a moment as she checks to make sure the trunk is properly closed before going around to get into the driver's seat. Looking over the top of the car at you, Gwen finally speaks once more.

“Please sit in the front, I can’t deal with Ji’s yapping in my ear constantly for six hours.” 

bursting into laughter and clapping your hands together, you nod.. “Will do.” 

You both get into the car and you turn to the blonde-headed girl next to you. 

“I’d say, if I didn’t know you I’d say you despised Ji.” 

Gwen lets out a groan, rolling her eyes as she looks at the steering wheel in front of her. 

“I don’t hate him, you know I don’t hate him,” Gwen sighs. “He just frustrates me.” 

“Because you love him and don’t know how to tell him.” 

Gwen’s head snaps in your direction. “I don’t love him! God, why would I love him?! He’s just a goddamn idiot.” 

Staring back at her with a blank expression, you blink. “Could you be any more of a tsundere?” 

Gwen mimics her words and makes a face to herself in disbelief. She stares out of the large window and down the street. Looking out for jisung making his way back to the car. 

“And don’t try and distract me, I know you’re acting weird and that your mind is going crazy on you,” Gwen explains. 

“I’m fine,” you fake a laugh. “Finer than fine.” 

Gwen snorts a laugh, “Bullshit! You’re freaking out because now you really have to go to Mina’s wedding, and see Seungmin and there’s no way for you to back out.” 

Feeling your cheeks begin to heat up, you look away and try to focus on something else. You don’t even try to deny Gwen’s claims, especially since she was right.

“And you’re not even fighting me on it,” Gwen tuts. “Seriously, babe, I’ll beat him up if he tries anything. I have your back.” 

You scoff and look back over to the blonde. “You couldn’t hurt anyone even if you tried.” 

Mimicking her words again, Gwen rolls her eyes. “Well, it’s the thought that counts.” 

“But is it though?” you ask rhetorically. 

“Look, we both know jisung couldn’t hurt a fly, so it’s up to me to be the badass of the group.” 

“That’s automatically Mina’s role,” you add. “And you love to burn him when he isn’t even here to defend himself.” 

“Well,  she’s not here right now is she? and of course I do, I need to get serotonin from somewhere.” 

“You need to stop being so mean to him,” you laugh causing Gwen to shrug. 

“He knows I don’t mean it,” Gwen responds, looking down to fiddle with her fingers in her lap. 

“Who knows you don’t mean it?” jisung’s voice causes both of you to jump out of your skin. Gwen looks around to see jisung is leant up against the car door, peering through the window with a tray of coffees in one hand. 

“Coffee,” Gwen hums, instantly going to grab one. “And no one it doesn’t matter.” 

jisung raises an eyebrow and looks over at you and just shrug your shoulders. Pouting, he looks back over to Gwen. “I thought I was sitting in the front?” 

“You’ve been demoted,” she says sipping away at her coffee. you weren’t sure you had even seen the girl as happy as she was with a coffee in her hand. 

“Fine,” jisung huffs. “I got you a caramel latte, y/nnie.” 

“And you’re the best,” you smile, leaning over to grab the hot drink from him.

Getting into the back seat, jisung leans forward between the two front seats. “So what were you two lovely ladies talking about just then?” Jisung cheekily smiles. “Gossiping about how you’re both deeply in love with me and can’t decide who should get the honour of dating me?” 

Gwen rolls her eyes and fakes a gag. “God, you’re obnoxious, you wish.” 

“You’re not my one-of-a-kind type of guy, sorry Ji,” you laugh, sending him a look.. 

“Well, I’ll have–” Jisung begins to speak, however, Gwen covers his mouth with her hand causing the rest of his sentence to come out in muffles. 

“We weren’t talking about that and don’t press on it okay?” Gwen asks. 

Gasping, Gwen quickly pulls her hand back before hitting Jisung in the shoulder. 

Looking back and forth between the two of you,, Jisung sighs. His eyes settle on you and frowns. “This is about Min isn’t it?” 

“Jisung!” 

“It’s fine!” you laugh. “It’s not like he doesn’t know anything about it.” 

Pushing his head back through the gap in the two front seats, he smiles, patting you on the shoulder. “I can protect you y/nnie, don’t worry.” 

It only takes one shared look between you and Gwen to turn to him, blink and burst into laughter. 

“What?! Why are you guys laughing?! I can protect her!” 

“You-” you hiccup as you try to speak. “You’d cry if he even looked at you the wrong way.” 

Jisung rolls his eyes as you both soon start to calm down, however, when you guys look at him again, both of your laughter start back up. 

“Bullies,” jisung mutters to himself, leaning back into the seat with his arms crossed. “All of you.” 

Gwen wipes her eyes, turning her attention towards the steering wheel. “Okay, okay,” she repeats as she tries to calm down. “We need to get going if we want to be there before nightfall.” 

 “Want me to play the tunes?” Jisung asks, popping his head through the gap once more. You weren’t sure where the boy got his energy from, part of you didn’t want to know. You were just thankful he decided not to drink coffee otherwise he would have been bouncing off the car walls.

“No!” Gwen cries as she starts the car. “You’ll play those stupid meme songs and you’ve been playing them nonstop already.” 

“You just have bad taste,” jisung snaps back, making Gwen gasp. 

“Taylor Swift is not bad taste and you know it,” Gwen laughs. “Mr let's be up at midnight so we can listen to midnights.” 

jisung stays quiet and Gwen scoffs to herself and mumbles something that you're unable to hear. Shaking your head, you turn to watch the world pass you by through the window. 

→→

“Can we stop to go to the bathroom?” Jisung complains from the back seat. 

“Why didn’t you go when we stopped literally half an hour ago?” you laugh as you ask him, looking over your shoulder. 

Jisung groans, sinking into his seat. “Because I didn’t need to go then!” 

“You’re a child!” Gwen cries.

“I’m older than you!” Jisung cries back. 

“By two days!” 

“Can we please stop, I need to go really bad!” Jisung begins to whine, stopping a foot. “Like I can’t even hold it, I could–” 

“Don’t you dare,” Gwen hisses, glaring at him through the review mirror. “The next stop is in ten minutes, so you better hold it otherwise if you piss in my car I’m leaving you there to rot.” 

“Okay, okay!” jisung responds. 

Watching from the sidelines, you giggle as you look back at a fidgeting jisung and then over at Gwen, you swore you could see the steam trying to escape her ears. 

It was a bit longer than ten minutes before Gwen pulls the car over and stops in one of the service stations and as soon as the car is stopped and off, Jisung unbuckles his belt and is off and out of the car in a flash. 

“At least we can get snacks?” you try and reassure her. 

Nodding along, Gwen takes her keys and opens her door and before she gets out, she turns to you. “And we’re not sharing them with him.” 

Laughing, you follow along behind her, making your way into the little shopping centre. 

Going into one of the general stores, Gwen wanders away as, you pick up a basket and begin to throw in a bunch of random snacks in there for both you and Gwen– and Jisung. Eventually finding you again, Gwen’s arms are now full of bottles of cold coffee and a few bottles of pop. 

“Don’t you want some water?” you ask as Gwen dumps all of the bottles into the basket. 

“I’ll have water when I’m dead,” she responds. 

Your eyebrows furrow together and you blink in confusion. “That’s not even the saying.” 

“Eh,” she shrugs. “Too bad.” 

Continuing to slowly make your way around the store and to waste time whilst you were waiting for Jisung to use the bathroom, you look over things you knew you wouldn’t buy. 

With Gwen following behind you this time, she clears her throat. “How are you feeling?” 

“Is this your way of seeing if I’m going to have an emotional breakdown anytime soon?” 

With a blank face, Gwen stares at you when you look away from the shelf and at her. 

“No, it’s just we’re like three hours away and just wanted to make sure you weren’t feeling too bad.” 

You shrug. You were trying not to think about it, because if you thought about it then the shaken can of your emotions would explode. You didn’t want that, Gwen and Jisung didn’t want that and Mina, Chan and everyone else didn’t want that either. 

“I’m fine,” you say with a sigh. 

“You haven’t seen him since he left,” Gwen states and you nod along. 

“I know Gwen,” you say laughing. “I was there.” 

“It’s just, I haven’t said it yet, but it’s okay to be nervous.”

You nod and hum for the nth time. “Thanks, Gwen, I mean it.” 

 Gwen doesn’t say much but picks up another item before putting it into the basket and you have to shift the weight by holding onto it with your arm. Gwen sees your struggle and takes the basket from you and you both walk over to the self-service. Scanning your items and paying for them. You split the bags between the both of you and start to make your way back to Gwen’s car. 

Exiting the large front doors of the service station, you stop when you see Jisung, sitting on the hood of Gwen’s car with a gigantic cup of a drink from the fast food place. 

“That brat,” Gwen hisses. “I swear to God if he complains he needs to piss again in twenty minutes, I’m kicking him out of the car.” 

You can’t help but laugh and you laugh even more when Jisung finally notices you both at the door and starts waving frantically at you both. 

“I can’t believe I like that fool,” Gwen tries to mumble to herself, but you catch it with a gasp. 

“I heard that!” You smile wide. “You finally said it! You like him!” 

Her eyes narrow as she snaps her head in your direction. “You. Heard. Nothing.” 

“Oh no,” You giggle, walking backwards in the direction of the car as you continue to look at her. “I definitely heard it.” 

“I swear to God y/n, I’ll leave you here too.” 

“Maybe that’s what I want, ever thought of that?” 

“You asshole,” Gwen hisses, following after you. 

“I won’t say anything,” you smile cheekily. “Yet.” You add before turning around and running over to the car. 

“What’s up, ladies?” Jisung asks, taking a long sip of his drink when you stop in front of the car. 

Gwen doesn’t look at either of you before opening her car door and throwing the bags inside. Looking up at Jisung once, her eyes narrow at him. 

“If you complain you need to piss again in half an hour, you’re dead.” 

“Got it.” He salutes.

Getting off of the hood of the car, he tries his best to look inside the carrier bags. “Got any snacks for me too?” 

“No/Yes,” Both you and Gwen say at the same time. 

“I thought we said we wouldn’t share!” Gwen gasps. 

“I felt bad!” You whine. 

“Thank you y/nnie,” Jisung says, patting you on the back. “At least one of you cares about me to get me snacks.” 

“Shut up Dofus,” Gwen rolls her eyes as she gets into the car and closes the door behind her. 

“She does care,” you hum at Jisung, making him laugh.

“I know,” he smiles. “It’s just fun pissing her off.” 

Rolling your eyes, you open the passenger side door. “You two are unbelievable.” 

→→

Resting your head in your palm, your eyes linger on the boy who was sitting at another table across from you in the dining hall. Your heart swirls when he makes eye contact and smiles before looking away.  

“Why haven’t you asked him out yet?” Jisung asks, moving to the seat in front of you, blocking the boy from view. 

Your eyebrows furrow, and tilting your head, you send a look of confusion in Jisung’s direction. “Who?” 

His face is blank like he just mentally face-palmed ten times over. He knew that you knew who he was on about, but he still gave in to your little charade. Resting his arms on the table, he leans forward and attempts to whisper, “Seungmin.” 

“Do you have to say it so loud?!” You hiss, pushing him away from you. 

He shrugs, picking up some of the leftover food that was on your tray. “Eh, I tried.” 

“You’re a pain in the ass,” you respond. 

“Who’s a pain in the ass?” Gwen asks, falling into the seat next to you with her tray of food. 

“Jisung–” 

“Say no more,” Gwen simply responds. 

When Jisung leans over to bug Gwen, you look back over to Seungmin and you smile at the way he looks over at you and slyly motions with his hand for you to leave the dining room. 

Looking back over to Jisung and Gwen, you clear your throat. “I forgot I had to do something before our next class, so I’ll just meet you there.” You said, getting up from out of your seat. 

Both of your best friends raise their eyebrows at you in suspicion. 

“Going where?” Gwen asks. 

“Just to the library, I’ll meet you at class,” and before they get another word out, you through your backpack over your shoulder and quickly make your way out of the dining hall and down the hallway. 

It wasn’t until you were a good distance away, that a hand-pulled you into an empty storage closet. 

Giggling, you lean up against the door and up at the culprit. 

“Hey,” 

“Hi, Min,” you smile, as his fingers entwine with your own. 

Seungmin stands above you, a smile playing on his lips. He squeezes your hand and takes the smallest step closer to you, “I missed you.” 

“I missed you too,” you hum.  “My friends are starting to get suspicious about me randomly disappearing, I can't tell if they're picking up on what we're doing.”

Chuckling, he raises an eyebrow at your statement and leans in to place a kiss on your cheek. “Really?”

You nod, leaning into his touch.

Seungmin holds the kiss for a second before pulling back. “That’s…” he pursed his lips together. “That’s… wow.”

“Yeah.” You hesitated before you continued.

it had been six months, five hours and forty-three minutes since the first time Seungmin had kissed you. Not that you would ever let him know that you knew it down to the minute, but ever since, Seungmin would pull you into random storage closets or empty classrooms whenever he wanted attention. If you were all around your friends, he'd try his best to find signals to get you to sneak away with him without anyone knowing.

Sure, it was fun, but at the same time, it was hard trying to hide it from everyone you cared about most. Especially when those said friends knew of your feelings for the boy. You just couldn't get a grasp on how he felt in return. It confused you and made you wonder about how he truly felt about you.

"What would I say if they figured it out?" You asked. "How would I explain it? Us? Are we even…?"

You didn't finish your sentence and even in the dark closet, you catch Seungmin’s eyes widen in panic. He made eye contact with you for a second, but let his eyes fall to the floor just as quickly. “Um…”

Your heart drops to your stomach.

Seungmin notices a dejected glint in your eye as you push your lips together and sigh. “Listen, Y/N…”

You didn’t need to hear more; that was enough of an answer. But you were too frozen to do anything else.

"We're having fun," Seungmin tries to explain, however, it was going in one ear and out the other. "Why need to explain what's going on?" 

Blinking, you nod. You couldn't say anything, it was like your mind had gone into emergency shutdown mode and you couldn't bring yourself to say a word– you couldn't. And it was like you could feel little cracks in your heart forming and everything Seungmin continued to say was like an ice pick chipping away at the already-formed lines. 

"Why do they need to know our business?" This was the final blow to the ice pick he has to your heart. "Y/N..." 

"It's fine." Clearing your throat, you nod and finally gain the courage to look him in the eye. There was a look in his eyes that you couldn't begin to describe, "I get it Seungmin." 

Your eyes feel glassy and you blink so quickly to try and stop them from spilling over onto your cheeks. Your hand goes limp in his. He doesn't say anything, just watches you-- examines you and you finally look away. 

"I need to get to class," 

You step away from him. His hand tightens around yours, but you pull it away.

"Y/N." 

"I get it Seungmin, I need to go." 

You quickly leave the storage closet and thankfully the hallway is empty. Hiccupping, the tears finally fall from your eyes and you wipe them away just as quickly. 

The door opens again and his footsteps fill your ears. They stop for a moment and part of you wishes that he'd come over, apologise and tell you that he'd shout about you and each other from the rooftops. However, that doesn't happen and the footsteps start up again but then get quieter and quieter before they disappear completely and the sobs you've been desperately holding in escape your lips.

→→

The sun was starting to dip below the horizon and the sky was a mix of pinks and purples. At some point during the final hours of the journey, Jisung had fallen asleep in the back seat and Gwen had turned down whatever music she had on to not disturb him. You on the other hand still had your head lead up against the window, watching the world go by. 

Originally, Gwen had curated a perfect road trip playlist that captured in her words, ‘the vibes needed for one such road trip’. However, after about four and a half hours into the drive, Gwen throws her phone at you for you to change the music into something more lively. 

Gwen turns the music down more, so it’s almost inaudible. 

“Did Mina tell you?” She questions.

Looking over at the blonde, you respond. “Tell me what?”

“She-” Gwen clears her throat. “She wants to hold a reunion dinner tomorrow night for the seven of us.” 

You blink in shock a couple of times before sinking into your seat. “Nope. She did not.”

You gaze out the window again, attempting to distract yourself with the way the scenery changed from open fields to more dense town life.

Gwen glances at you and sighs. “Y/N…”

“Don’t.” You sigh. God, this is going to suck. 

“It’ll be okay.”

“Will it?” Your mind is swarming with all the possible ways the dinner could go wrong. All of them involved your sort-of-an-ex.

“Plus, you have a whole day to prepare!”

She said it so optimistically. Your brain had already gotten accustomed to the fact that you would see him in three days. Now that time has been shortened to about 24 hours. Not even three years of forgetting he exists could prepare you for that.

You wish you could’ve just wiped him out from your memory. Maybe if you never remembered what happened, things would be different. Maybe it would be like a fresh start.

The hotel was a fairly fancy one, with large pillars around the entrance. You almost expected it to have a doorman to open and close doors as guests come and go. 

The winter air quickly nips at your nose as soon as you get out of the car and all three of you rush to the trunk to get your things out so you can head inside. 

In the next second, you’re all inside the festive-looking reception. There’s a large green tree decorated in the corner with fake gifts positioned under it.

The reception desk itself is also decorated to the nines, with lights hung up underneath the counter side and fake snow lining the floor. It also has its own little tree with a bowl of candies next to it for guests to take as they pleased.  

As you enter you can hear faint jazz coming through the glass doors leading into what you assumed was a bar. The whole atmosphere was so relaxed that it put you at ease. So relaxed in fact, it let all thoughts slip from your mind as Gwen checks the both of you in. 

The whole time, Jisung is clinging onto Gwen like a tired baby. Gwen tried to brush him off at first but quickly gave up once she saw he wasn’t going to move. Even after she’s done with your room and Jisung has to check into his own, he’s not moved a budge. 

It's only when you guys have to take your stuff and walk to the elevators does he let her escape his grasp. 

Waiting for the elevator feels antagonistically long considering you’re tired and have been stuck in the car for six-plus hours. Never had you been so excited to get into a room, fall onto the bed and let sleep guide you into dreamland. You couldn’t think about anything else about how good being in bed and sleeping the night away would feel. 

Life seemed to have other plans for you though as the doors to the elevator opened and your body went into full alert. 

Life hated you, it was official. This is why you weren’t allowed nice things. 

The doors opened to show an equally as tired Seungmin with his older brother Minho. 

There goes having even a day to prepare, you thought to yourself. 

When his eyes seem to land and focus on you, it takes a second for him to react. However, Minho is faster at reacting than he is. 

“What’s up guys!” the older boy smiles. “Long time no see!” 

“You’re telling me,” Jisung laughs, pulling Minho into a hug. “I’ve missed your face.” 

Pulling away slightly, Minho smirks at Jisung, “and I’ve missed yours.” 

“You always know how to make someone blush!” Jisung chuckles, taken to the older boy's smooth words. 

Whilst this is all going on, Seungmin’s eyes are trained on you and you begin to feel uncomfortable under his gaze. You can’t tell which is worse, him speaking to you or him not saying anything at all. Part of you didn’t even want to stay to hear what he had to say– if he had anything to. 

You’d think after three years, maybe even a hi would be acceptable. 

You were being a hypocrite though, you knew you were. Wanting him to say hi to you when you didn’t even want him to face you in the first place. It didn’t make sense.

“Or maybe you just like the attention,” Gwen mutters, before grabbing onto your hand and pulling you into the elevator. “Sorry Minho, we need to go up to our room now, long trip, you know what it’s like.” 

Minho hums and smiles, “Sure go ahead! We’ll see you guys tomorrow at the dinner right?” 

You nod silently as Gwen hums in confirmation. 

“We’ll see you there,” she smiles quickly. 

Looking at Minho you smile too. “See you there.” 

“Hey! Wait for–” Jisung begins, but it gets cut off by the closing of the doors. 

When the elevator starts moving, Gwen groans. 

“Stupid Jisung, stupid Minho, stupid Seungmin.” she continues to repeat out loud. 

Looking at her with a confused look, you blink. “You okay?” 

She jumps, turning to you like she had forgotten you were even there for a moment. 

“Huh?” she asks. 

Repeating your question, she nods. 

“I’m fine, just, I didn’t expect us to run into them tonight I’m sorry, I didn’t even realise they would be staying here.” 

Shrugging your shoulders, you let your eyes gaze back over to the elevator doors. “It’s fine, not like you would have known, plus maybe it was better this way– seeing him this way I mean.” 

“What do you mean?” Gwen questions.

“Now I can’t stress over the first time seeing him can I? Cause it’s already happened.” 

“I guess,” Gwen responds, giving herself a moment to think about it. 

“Plus I’m too tired right now, I don’t want to think anymore.” you let out a yawn and cover your mouth. Leaning into Gwen’s side, like Jisung had done not fifteen minutes earlier, you speak. “Let’s just go to our room and forget boys exist and just sleep the night away.” 

Gwen laughs and you can feel her nodding her head. “That I would drink to.” 

Soon enough, you were both in your room. With two large double beds, it was all that you needed for the extended weekend away. Claiming your bed,-the one closest to the window– you let your bags fall at the end of it before dramatically flinging yourself onto it. 

Here’s to sleep, you thought. And forgetting boys exist. 

→→

You immediately hated your dress the minute you put it on. The baby pink fabric hugged your body in the worst ways possible, and the more you stared at yourself in the mirror, the more exposed you felt. You tug at the end of it to try and pull it down more, failing to find some relief. It felt suffocating and you weren’t even sure why you packed it in the first place. 

“Can you stop worrying for one second,” Gwen says as she leans forward to apply her lipstick in the mirror. “You look hot. Let Seungmin know what he’s missing.” 

“Gwen!” you gasp. 

Snorting a laugh, she puts the lid back on her lipstick and turns to you. “What? It’s been– three years? I don’t think it’s bad to make him regret everything he did to you in senior year.” 

“It would be better if I didn’t see him at all,” you mumble whilst fidgeting with your dress again. 

“Babe, remember what I said?” Gwen asks, causing you to take a deep breath before releasing it. 

“Don’t let him get in the way this time. It’s about the wedding, Mina and Chan, not him.” 

Gwen happily hums and takes a few steps over towards you before she lightly places a hand on one cheek and kisses the other. “You got it!” 

Blinking at her, your mouth drops and you shake your head. “Ever since you confessed to liking Jisung, you’ve been weird.” 

Her sweet smile drops and slaps you on your arm. 

“I didn’t confess! I told you, you heard nothing!” 

You giggle and wipe away whatever lipstick remains on your cheek in the mirror as Gwen slips on her shoes. 

Soon after, there was a continuous knock at the door and Jisung’s loud voice echoed through it. “Come on, let’s go ladies!” 

Raising an eyebrow at Gwen, she shoots you a glare. 

“You heard nothing,” she whispers. “I don’t like that idiot.” 

“Denial,” you whisper-sing back. 

“Hurry up! They’re waiting for us!” Jisung’s voice continues to carry through the door. “Hello? Are–” 

Opening the door, Gwen speaks. “Shut up idiot, try not to disturb the whole hotel, yeah?” 

Jisung takes a moment to look Gwen up and down and clears his throat before straightening his back up. “You look good.” 

“Thanks,” Gwen nods. “You too.” 

Jisung pulls at the collar of his white dress shirt and it’s easy to notice his cheeks tint pink. “Thank you.” 

Rolling your eyes, you pick up your back and put it over your shoulder. Pushing on Gwen slightly to get her out of the door, you close it behind you. “Come on, let's go, lovebirds.” 

“Y/N!” 

When you got to the restaurant that Mina and Chan had planned for the reunion dinner, everyone apart from you, Gwen and Jisung had already arrived and sat down. You counted your lucky stars that Seungmin was already sitting in between his older brother, Minho, and Chan. 

As soon as Mina lays her eyes on the three of you, she shoots up from out of her seat and over to you. 

“Look at you guys!” She laughs, pulling each of you into your own hug. “I’ve missed you so much!” 

“We’ve missed you too!” You and Gwen say in unison. 

“What they said,” Jisung laughs and ducks away when Mina tries to hit him playfully. “I’ve missed you too Mina.” 

Going behind the three of you, she lightly pushes you in the direction of the table. “Come, come sit.” 

Mina takes her seat once again beside Chan and you take the one next to her, leaving Gwen and Jisung to sit next to each other and Minho. 

Pleasantries were passed around and you kept your eyes far away from Seungmin as possible. However, that was difficult when you could feel his eyes boring into you. It was only when Jisung engaged in a conversation with him that the sensation went away and you finally gave yourself the chance to look at him properly. 

You could see how much he had changed in the past three years since you last saw him. The baby fat has now gone from his cheeks and his hair was a lighter shade of brown than anything he had in high school. But his eyes still glinted when he smiled and you looked away as soon as he moved his head towards you. 

You couldn’t explain the way how in three years everything about him stayed the same, but changed completely at the same time. 

Tucking some hair behind your ear, you try to get your attention back on what Mina was talking about. 

“You good?” Mina asks, making you nod frantically. 

“I’m good, gooder than good.” you smile. 

Mina looks at you blankly. 

“You’re a terrible liar,” she smiles. “but, I’m glad you’re here.” 

“Me too,” you return her smile. 

“And,” Mina leans in slightly and rests her chin on one hand. “We’re going to the hotel bar after this so you won’t have to think for a while.” 

Rolling your eyes, you continue to laugh. “Mina!” 

“What?” She asks through her own laugh. “And who knows, maybe you’ll meet someone at the wedding, there are plenty of attractive people attending.” She finishes her sentence with a wink. 

Suddenly, Chan leans in next to Mina as well with his own cheeky smile and a raised eyebrow. “Who’s this about attractive people attending the wedding?” 

Mina rolls her eyes and pats his cheek after she’s turned to look at him. 

“For Y/N silly,” 

“Ahh, of course!” Chan laughs. “I can even introduce you to some of my friends.” 

Feeling your cheeks begin to heat up, you raise a hand and shake your head. “No no no, it’s okay, you don’t need to!” 

“Well, I can still introduce you!” Chan smiles. “More friends are more friends.” 

Mina jokingly shrugs. “And that’s the only thing we don’t agree on, having a bunch of friends.” 

“And I love you for being your people-hating self.” Chan muses. 

“People are just ugh,” Mina begins to rant. “I like being able to count the people I love on two hands, thank you very much.” 

Whilst Mina is continuing her speech on her hate of people, Chan is just sitting there, his eyes in the shape of hearts as he watches her. It made your heart swell with love and admiration. Mina and Chan were everything good in a relationship, they were so hopelessly in love that it honestly made you kind of jealous. 

It was a love you wanted– you wished for.  

Your eyes went around the table again and once again your gaze lingers on Seungmin. Even after three years, you can’t help but look his way.

 There was the smoothest Jazz playing in the hotel bar. The boys, albeit mostly Jisung and Minho, were ordering drink after drink, shot after shot for everyone to enjoy. You were starting to feel the effects of the shots and you let out a happy sigh as you looked around at everyone. 

Your eyes linger on Seungmin’s back as he leans up against the bar and talks to the rest of the boys. Gwen and Mina’s laughter fills your ears from next to you. 

“I’m going to step outside for a bit,” you quickly say to the girls and they nod in response just as quickly whilst muttering a ‘be safe’. 

Getting up from your seat, you sway and stumble your way into the hotel lobby and out into the main entrance. 

The cold hits you instantly and a shiver moves up your spine. You wished you brought a jacket out with you, however, there was also something comforting about it. Resting the back of your head against the cold brick, you take a deep breath and exhale it slowly. 

It was like a moment of peace in the middle of a stressful day. 

“Y/N…” 

And then that moment was gone. 

Opening your eyes, you kept your eyes straight ahead. 

“Seungmin.” 

“You look good,” he starts and he takes a step into your line of sight. “And, I’ve missed you.” 

“Well I wonder who’s to blame for that,” you finally look him in the eye. 

He takes a step forward and frowns, “Y/N, please.” 

“What do you want, Seungmin?”

“To see you.” 

“Don’t say that.” 

He steps forward again, “I wish we could go back, back to then.” 

He brings up a hand and gently moves some of your hair from out of your face as he gazes into your eyes. 

Without fail, he once again had a grip on your heart. You could curse him mentally over and over again, but still, nothing would change.

“You were the one that left,” you whisper. 

“And it was so dumb of me,” he responds and repeats. "I've missed you so much." 

His hand stays resting on your cheek and you’re not long how long you’re both standing there. Staring at each other, gazing into each other’s eyes. 

His eyes flicker to your lips and back up to your eyes. “Why can’t we just go back? For tonight?” 

“We shouldn’t,” you whisper. 

“Why not?” 

Frowning, you look down at his lips as well and back up. “Because it’s not that easy, you left Seungmin. Remember? You didn’t want to date officially.” 

“And I was a fool and I regretted it every day after I left.” 

“Even if you did, you could have come back.” 

“You know that wouldn’t have been that easy either.” 

“You didn’t try,” you said, tilting your head up. His thumb gently glides along your cheek. 

“I’m here now,” his nose brushes against yours. 

All your senses were yelling– screaming at you to stop, back away. Your heart was pounding, but your mind was completely numb. Every single movement, every touch he made sent you into overdrive. 

You couldn’t tell what you’d regret more, giving in or not giving in at all. 

“For tonight?” You ask. 

He nods slowly, leaning in. “For the weekend?” 

“Don’t push your luck,” you add, closing your eyes. 

Chuckling, you feel his breath against your lips. 

“For tonight.” he reaffirms before connecting your lips together. 

The hand he has on your cheek slowly moves down to your neck as the other rests on your hip to try and bring you even closer together. Your own hands go up and you wrap your arms around his neck, your fingers playing with his hair.

You tried to catch your breath when your lips separate and when you open your eyes, he’s already looking at you. It’s not even a second later that you’re using your arms to bring him closer to once again reconnect your lips. 

Using his thumb to angle your chin, he deepens the kiss. The longer it went on, the more and more your soul was set alight. Every sensation was heightened.

You gasp when his lips leave yours and move frantically to your chin and then down your neck. 

“I’m sharing a room with Gwen,” you question in gasps as he settles on one part on the bottom of your neck. “We can’t go there.”

Without saying a word, he uses one hand to fish out his hotel room key and holds it up between two fingers for you to see. 

“Are you the only one in there?” you continue to question. He reluctantly draws his attention away from your neck and goes back up to your chin before kissing your lips once more.

“Yes,” kiss. “I,” kiss. “Am,” another kiss.

“So,” he kisses you again before you can continue and you have to push him away so you can even think. “Just for tonight.” 

Smiling, he takes your hand before pulling you quickly to make your way to his room. Your giggles fill his ears and your mind repeats: Just for tonight.

→→

You groan quietly, rubbing your eyes with your palms as you sit up slightly, resting your weight on your elbows. Your head hurt and your throat was unbelievably dry– you reminded yourself to never drink again, but you knew you would. 

Blinking, your sight soon began clear as you and the memories of the night returned like looking into a kaleidoscope. Sitting up quickly, you curse to yourself when Seungmin groans from next to you and rolls over, thankfully, however, he stays asleep. 

Quietly getting up, you slip on your underwear, fail to find your bra and attempt to put your dress from the night before back on. Once you’ve picked up your shoes and your bag, you turn back to see Seungmin. He’s lying on his front and spread out across his bed. 

He looks so peaceful and part of you wants to take back everything you said and jump right back into the bed and into his arms. To stay in this little bubble, where nothing ever went wrong and to pretend like you were still teenagers foolish and in love. 

It’s foolish and risky, but you take a few steps over towards his bed, lean over and lightly place a kiss on his forehead, your lips linger for a moment before you pull away and whisper. “Thank you for the night.” 

As soon as you’re out of his room, it’s like you can breathe again. 

You take your time walking back to your own room. Instead of taking the lift, you take the stairs just to give yourself more time to think. Your feet carry you up the cold metal stairs to the soft carpet of the hallways. Soon enough, you came to your own room and you find your key in the depth of your bag and unlock the door before swinging it open, taking a step inside and letting it close behind you. 

“About time you showed up,” Gwen’s voice makes you jump out of your skin. 

You let your shoes and your bag slip from your fingers and you say nothing as you walk over to your bed and fall face-first into it. 

The whole time, Gwen is watching you with a frown. “What happened?” 

It was a minute later that you pushed yourself to roll over and look up at the ceiling. “I slept with Seungmin.” 

“I assumed that considering you and him randomly disappeared halfway through the night., I just mean how? Why? I thought you didn’t want to see him at all.” 

“I didn’t think you’d be one for the intimate details,” you giggle as she fakes a gag. 

“Oh god no,” she shakes her head. “I don’t want to know anything about Kim Seungmin’s sex game, I want to know how you go from never wanting to lay your eyes on him to getting under him.” 

Your giggles fill the room, but they’re soon stopped by Gwen chucking a pillow at you, hitting you with a thump. “OW! What the heck Gwen?!” 

“You were having dirty thoughts and I don’t want to know!” 

Sitting up, you throw the pillow back to her. “You don’t know that.” 

“Yes, I do.” Gwen catches the pillow. “You had the giggle and you know for a fact that it wasn’t an innocent one.” 

You giggle again, “Cause I didn’t just go under him.” 

Thwack. 

“I SAID I DIDN’T WANT TO KNOW!” 

Rubbing to soothe where the pillow hit you, you quickly apologise whilst still giggling. 

“I’m having trouble getting a reading on you,” Gwen states. “You came in super sad and out of it, but now you’re giggling like a madman.” 

Groaning, you fall back onto the bed and look over at your blonde best friend. 

“I just–” you pause. “Well–” another pause. 

“Well?” 

“Just for tonight,” you repeat your words from last night. 

Gwen blinks, opens her mouth and closes it again. “Excuse me?” 

“Just for tonight, it’s what we said last night.” You move your gaze to the ceiling. “Just for tonight.” 

“And what does that mean?” 

“Just like it suggests, we had one night, like nothing ever happened– as if nothing changed for a single night.” 

You hear Gwen move the blankets that covered her and soon the bed dips next to you. “Babe…” 

“I know,” you fake a laugh. “I’m so stupid.” 

Gwen slowly moves the hair out of your face. When you look at her, you can see her frown. “You’re not stupid.” 

“It’s just, I knew, I knew I shouldn’t have given in, I knew I shouldn’t have let him kiss me or let it go further than it did, but I just…” Your sentence comes to a stop as you try and think of how to continue it. 

This was your mind every time you thought of Seungmin. Stuck in the middle of a forest, with no map, no compass and no way out. Lost and confused, yet every time he looked at you, spoke to you, uttered the words you so desperately wanted to hear, gave you baseless hope that he always seemed to give you. The hope that everything would work out, that he’d confess his love and scream it to the world.

But it didn’t happen then and you knew it wouldn’t happen now. 

“You’re not dumb or stupid,” Gwen sighs, putting her hands on either side of your face and forcing you to look at her. “Your feelings aren’t stupid, sure it’s frustrating but you shouldn’t beat yourself up for giving into those feelings.” 

“Why can’t I just move on?” you question. 

“Because feelings are fickle things and it’s just not as easy as we want them to be.” Gwen frowns. “Look, everything that’s happened with you and Seungmin, they’re– they were painful for you, and sure, it’s scared you and affected you.” 

“He just has this control over me and it’s like I can’t say no to him.” 

Smiling a sad smile, Gwen laughs slightly. “It’s love, babe.” 

“I hate it,” you laugh, but it lacks the happiness laughter normally has. 

“No you don’t,” Gwen responds. “And you don’t hate him either, no matter how much you want to.” 

Sitting up, Gwen’s hands fall from your face and you lean into her and she instantly wraps her arms around you in a protective hug. Letting out a sigh, you affirm her words. “I really don’t and I don’t think I ever could.” 

Actually giggling, you feel Gwen place a kiss on your hairline. “Oh my foolish best friend, what am I going to do with you?”

→→

Seungmin’s couch was one of the most comfortable couches you had ever had the chance to sit on. It was a dark wine red fabric corner sofa, just warn in enough that it was comfortable. 

Even though no one in their friend group knew of Seungmin and your’s ‘situationship’, the friend groups still found their way to merging– this mostly being because Jisung was a social butterfly that couldn’t keep his mouth shut, but nonetheless. Now the group was bigger, it gave you all more of an excuse to meet up and see each other. 

Which would be great if you weren’t currently upset and annoyed at Seungmin. What made it worse was that you couldn’t even tell Gwen, your best friend. Sure, you could have properly told her anyway, but you didn’t want to go behind Seungmin’s back like that, especially when he had already made it well-known how he felt about the whole situation. 

the time in the storage closet flashing in your mind constantly like a constant pain still reminding you that it's still there. 

Every time you picture his blank stare and inability to say the words you wanted to hear made your heart crack even more. However, you didn't want to let him go, sure if Gwen knew she'd probably scream about you and your worth, but that didn't matter. 

Not when your crush of the past year was actually giving you the attention you desired-- even if it was in secret. You could only do so much to show him how upset you really were. By sitting on his couch during these group hangouts, giving him little to no attention. 

Was it petty? Maybe so. But it's not like you could yell and scream at him how you felt in front of everyone, not that you'd be able to do that anyway. Not when he'd give you one look and you'd break.

You were sat wedged between Gwen and Jeongin, one of Seungmin’s friends, as you barely focused on some overplayed tv show on the tv. Gwen, dramatically lead on your shoulder with a bowl of popcorn in front of her would sometimes grab a handle full before bringing it up to your mouth so you can take some. Jeongin, laying on your other shoulder, whined randomly and complained every time the show would say a bad joke. 

The whole time, Seungmin is sitting alone on the loveseat, arms crossed and a scowl present on his face. This was maybe the third group hangout in a row where you had given the boy little to no attention, yet gave his friends (as well as yours) a never-ending abundance of it. 

Don’t get him wrong, he wasn’t jealous. Not at all, not when he’s been the one to see the way your cheeks turn pink when he flirts with you. Or how smiley you get after he kisses you. But no, he wasn’t jealous that his friends were getting more attention than he was, that you were looking at them more than at him.

Kim Seungmin doesn’t get jealous. 

One would be foolish to think otherwise. 

It’s not until Mina disturbs his quiet jea– brooding time that his scowl turns into an annoyed eye roll. 

“Can you help me with something in the kitchen please.” Mina states, rather than asks with a fake smile plastered on her lips. Before Seungmin can even get a word out to complain, she holds her palm up. “Don’t even try, help, now.” 

It was times like this that made Seungmin wonder why people loved having siblings. Especially when his older brother and sister always took the chance to remind him that they were older. 

Groaning, he gets up and follows Mina to their somewhat large family kitchen. 

“What do you need help with?” Seungmin asks. 

Mina doesn’t respond as she turns to him with her arms crossed. “Why are you pouting in the corner like a kicked puppy?” 

The younger boy blinks and blinks again, “Huh?! No, I’m not!” He argues. “Did you want help or not?” 

“Of course not!” Mina hissed. “Would you rather me ask in front of your dear friends?” 

The colour drains from his face as he quickly shakes his head. 

“Look, I know you may think of me as an annoying pain in the ass older sister, but I still notice things alright?” Mina says. “And I can notice when my foolish younger brother has a new love interest, no matter how hard he tries to keep it and her from everyone around them.” 

“I don’t know–” Seungmin stops midsentence when Mina glares at him. 

“Don’t try and pull that shit with me Seung, I know you better than you think I do.” 

Rolling his eyes, he shifts his weight onto one foot. 

He hates the feeling of Mina’s eyes boring into him like she was able to peel back every layer of him. 

Again, he didn’t see the fuss of having older siblings.

“We’re–” Seungmin pauses with a groan. He hated this and he especially hated how it was Mina grilling him out. “We’re nothing.” 

“Now, how dumb do you think I am?” Mina asks, but just like before she speaks again before he gets the chance. “No, seriously, how dumb do you think I am to think I would just take that?” 

“It’s complicated,” Seungmin responds.

“Complicated because it is complicated or complicated because you’re making it complicated?” 

When he doesn’t respond, Mina shakes her head and tsks. 

“Do you want to date her?” Mina asks.

Seungmin halts for a moment before he shakes his head.

Mina sighs, “Let me guess, you wouldn’t want her to date someone else?” 

Seungmin scowls once again, this time at the subject of her question. Had he thought about it much? The idea of you dating someone else? Of either of you dating someone else? 

Not really, but would he admit that? Of course not.

“She– She can do whatever she wants.” Seungmin almost hisses. “I don’t care, like I said, we’re not dating.” 

“How do you think she feels about this whole situationship? Are you guys on the same page?” Mina asks. 

“The pages might be a bit smudged.,” Seungmin attempts to whisper, but all this manages to do is make Mina laugh at her poor younger brother.

“And that’s why you’re pouting in the corner like a kicked puppy,” She comments. “You’re trying to play this cool tsundere type that doesn’t care when all she wants is to be able to be open about how she feels for the person she likes.” Mina scoffs. “But let me tell you this little bro, it’s not cool and you’re going to lose her with this attitude. Not when she finally realises she can find someone who won’t be scared to show her off like she deserves.” 

“Whatever,” Seungmin hisses, unable to find the words to actually say anything in defence. 

“What happens when you move away for college at the end of the year? Are you just going to keep her quietly hoping for something open? Or are you going to let her go?” 

Seungmin’s silent once again and at this point, he’s letting Mina’s words go in one ear and out the other. He’s had enough of her ‘older sister, I apparently know better’ lectures. And anyway, college wasn’t for another month or two at least, the way he thought about it was you didn’t even need to know. You’d break off whatever thing you had and you’d move on with how qualms. No issues. 

“You haven’t even told her have you?” Mina asks at her brother’s silence. 

He shakes his head, “I didn’t think there was a reason to.” 

“Just so you know, the only reason I’m not beating you up right now is because you’re my brother.” Mina hisses. 

Gasping, Seungmin glares at the slightly shorter girl. “Well thanks, sis, I love you too.” 

“Don’t try and pull an attitude with me Seung, it’s not going to work because you know you’re being an ass right now.” Crossing her arms over her chest, Mina continues. “Whether or not you agree on what you want, you need to tell her about you leaving town for college. It’s the only decent thing to do, you can’t just up and leave her in the dark.” 

Seungmin just hums. 

“Seungmin,” Mina threatens.

“Yeah,” he sighs. “Whatever, I’ll think about it.” 

It was only after a minute or two that Seungmin spoke once again. "Are you done lecturing me now?" 

"I don't know," Mina responds. "You done being an idiot?" 

Rolling his eyes, Seungmin makes his way back into the living room to see the three of you still sitting in the same position on the sofa. Gwen and Jeongin on either side of you, their heads on your shoulders. 

Falling back into the loveseat, the scowl returns. Mina's words echoing in his head. 

It's not like he had to tell you, it would be fine.

→→

The rehearsal dinner is in a large dining room area just off the side of the actual wedding venue. The staff had already begun setting up the room for the next day and so the were already splashes of the wedding colours as ribbons on the back of the chairs. The large dining table that was placed in the centre of the room was covered in what seemed to be a lace-like tablecloth. 

The table itself was beautiful, with two large candles placed just off the centre and little name placeholders written in the same font that had been on the original wedding invitations. Of course, Mina and Chan sat in the centre, with two large thrones that reflected silver. There were two people sat either side of these thrones with the rest of the seats being on the opposite side of the table. 

Taking your seat, on one side you had Jisung, which you were thankful for. On the other, you had one of Chan's friends from his home back in Australia, who introduced himself as Felix. He seemed lovely, which made sense considering he was good friends with Chan. Across from you, were Chan's brother and sister whereas Seungmin and Minho were sat on Mina's left-hand side. Once settled, you released a breath you didn't know you were holding when Chan's siblings did in fact sit in the seats across from you.

You sent Felix a smile after you had both sat down and said hello to each other. 

"So," Felix smiles. "You must be friends with Mina right?" 

You nod. The way Felix was smiling made you copy it in return, it was hard to not smile when you saw it. "Yeah, I am." 

He makes a face of realisation then he nods slowly. "Of course, I feel like I would have remembered someone as beautiful as you if Chan had introduced us before." 

Gasping slightly at his bold comment. You giggle, tucking some hair behind your ear. "Thank you," 

Hearing his laughter made you want to hear it more. It was magical. It made you wonder where Chan had found the boy. He seemed too good to be true. 

As you and Felix chat, you begin to feel someone glaring daggers at you. Trying to ignore it, you remain focused on what Felix is saying. 

He looks over your shoulder for a moment before gazing back into your eyes. "Just so you know, that guy over there is staring at you pretty viciously," Felix explains. 

You sigh and look over your shoulder quickly to confirm it was indeed who you thought it was. 

Seungmin. 

He's sat there, leant back in his seat at a slight angle as he's staring at the back of your head. You could tell every part of him was tense, angry. Looking back at Felix, you smile awkwardly. 

"That's," you pause. "That's complicated." 

Felix laughs, again his smile makes you smile too. "Don't worry, I get it, Ex?" He asks. 

You inhale sharply. "Eh, something like that."

“Ah, yes,” Felix nods. “One of those things.”

Your eyes fall to your lap as you nod in agreement. It had always been difficult to label whatever you and Seungmin had, not that he helped with that all that much. Maybe that thing was enough of a descriptor. But deep down, you always wished it was more than that. 

However, all of your attention gets drawn away when the sounds of Chan tapping a fork on his champagne glass. No more thinking about that thing, Y/N. At least for now. This dinner was about Chan and Mina’s thing. A thing that was definitely so much more than whatever thing you and Seungmin have– had. Something real, something you wished for on every shooting star.

"Hi everyone," he smiles awkwardly, clearing his throat. "Thank you all for being here at our rehearsal dinner before the big day tomorrow." He looks around at Mina, who's staring up at him lovingly and takes her hand in his before he looks around at everyone again. "We're really happy you could join us in making this an event to remember for the rest of our lives." He turns to Mina again, his ears already turning pink. "And Mina, I promise I'm not going to tell you my speech early, but I am so thankful and blessed to be able to love you and be loved by you. You really make me the happiest man on earth." 

Mina pouts, standing up. She uses her free hand to playfully hit Chan on the arm. "Why are you trying to make me cry in front of everybody?!" She laughs and so does everyone else. "I love you too, so much." 

"Kiss! Kiss! Kiss!" Jisung cries, breaking the sweet moment with a raised champagne glass of his own. He quickly lowers it when both you and Gwen hit either arm. "Sorry!" 

"Don't mind if I do," Mina laughs before quickly stealing a kiss from her soon-to-be husband. Chan's blush has officially moved from his ears to his cheeks at this point. His face is bright red, but no one says a word.

"Seungmin next!" Jisung laughs, staring directly into Seungmin's eyes. 

Gasping next to him, Gwen hits his arm as she hisses his name. "Jisung!" You, however, lean back slightly to look behind Jisung at Gwen. With your own glare on your face, you mouth, What did you tell him? and in return, she smiles sheepishly. 

Everyone at the table is silent, their eyes either on Seungmin or flickering between the two boys. Seungmin raises an eyebrow, leans forward to rest his weight on one elbow and smirks. "I will if you kiss her." 

Seungmin doesn't say a name, but everyone—let's be real, everyone but Gwen—knows who he's on about. Speechless, Jisung’s mouth drops and he quickly looks down at the empty placement plate. "I didn't say anything." 

Seungmin leans back in his chair before making eye contact with you. It's like all your brain cells leave you in that moment and you have to look away to try and regain a conscious thought. 

Still standing, Mina sends a glare to both Seungmin and Jisung, which they shrink at before her lips quickly form into a smile. 

“They’ll be bringing out the starter and then the first course very soon, so please talk whilst we wait.” She ends with a smile and sits, but not before quickly slapping Seungmin’s arm making him pout at his older sister. 

You weren't able to hear what she whispered to him next, but by the look on his face, he didn't look too pleased. He turns from her, crosses his arms over his chest and looks anywhere but her direction. Catching her eye, she smiles, and you smile back.

Excusing yourself from your seat, you quickly move and crouch down in between Gwen and Jisung’s. Trying to muster up the most venomous yet loving glare you could, you smile at her. “Can I just talk to you for a minute?” 

Gwen laughs awkwardly. Jisung, however, keeps his head down as he plays with his fingers like Seungmin's words are still ringing around in his head. 

She pulls her seat out and you stand as she does. “Sure.” 

Grabbing onto her wrist, you guide her out of the room, just far enough where you wouldn’t have to worry about anyone hearing you both. Stopping, her wrist falls from your grasp and you turn to her. “What did you tell him?!” 

“Nothing!” Gwen throws her arms up and crosses them in front of her a second later. “…I mean, not nothing, but not everything!”

“You know how big of a mouth that boy has!” You hiss, “We can’t tell him shit unless we want him to spill it.” 

“I know!” Gwen huffs. “I just said you guys slept together, that’s it, nothing more.” 

"Gwen!" 

"I'm sorry," Gwen repeats. "I don't know what happened, he looked at me and I just had to tell him." 

"I stand by what I said before," you laugh. "You guys are unbelievable." 

Gwen blinks and opens her mouth to speak before closing it again. Once she finds the words, she says, "When did you say that?" 

You catch onto the servers starting to pass you with food on trays. "It doesn't matter," you mumble. "We should go back in before Mina starts wondering where we are." Gwen hums and nods her head, but before you can start to walk away, she grabs your wrist and pulls you into a hug.

"I'm sorry, I really didn't think he'd say that in front of everyone." you hear her mumble as you wrap your arms around her. Giggling, you hug her as tightly as you can for a second making her complain. 

"It's fine," you smile. "Just next time give me a heads up you've told your boyfriend about my non-existent love life yeah?" 

"He's not my–" she starts, but soon gives up. "Yeah sure, I'm sorry," she repeats. 

Pulling away, you raise an eyebrow at her. "You didn't deny it?" 

"Everyone says it anyway," Gwen shrugs. "He's confusing, I don't know and don't try and distract me. I wouldn't say your love life was very non-existent at the moment." 

"Let's just agree to say we both have complicated situations right now?" you suggest causing the blonde to crack a laugh. 

"Sure," 

Walking back into the dining hall, you see how the servers have in fact started bringing out and placing the starters for people to pick at on a separate table. Not looking where you’re going, you startle yourself by almost walking into one of the servers.

“Oh, sorry,” you mumbled, looking down and stepping aside, until you caught a whiff of one of the dishes. A server walked by with a fruit platter containing all colours of the rainbow, and the one behind them held a plate full of garlic shrimp skewers just waiting for you to grab. The smoky yet buttery aroma of steak passed you by next, pulling you back to the dinner table with Gwen in tow, who chuckled at your little trance.

Your mouth-watering, you stand on your toes as the other attendees scramble for first dibs on the incoming foods. It seemed like the steak and the garlic bread were the most popular choices, so you decide to come back for it later—there would more than likely be another plate coming anyway. Instead, something else that no one else seemed to touch makes your eyes almost pop out of their sockets in excitement.

Cheese.

There was nothing you loved more in this world than cheese and on top of that, you don't think anything or anyone could come close to it. Cheese was your best friend, sorry, Gwen, cheese was always there went something went wrong, again, sorry, Gwen, cheese was everything right in the world. Whether it was cold, straight out of the fridge, or heated up so it was warm and stringy, it was perfect. If someone told you to do something and in return they offered cheese? You’d do it in a heartbeat, no questions asked, that's just how much you loved the stuff. 

Evilly chuckling under your breath, you grab your plate and make a beeline for the tiers of different cheeses to try. You take one of every option there and make a small pile of them on your plate. Brie, cheddar, parmesan, pepper jack, gouda, and—

“Ooh, camembert!”

You jump, dropping the cheese in your hand. Who dares to take your precious cheese? Just thirty seconds ago, you were the only person at the cheese board. What could have changed within that short time frame?

A hand reaches out to grab a slice of camembert and you follow it to meet eyes with the last person you wanted there. Seungmin stands across the table, an addicting, yet very punchable, smirk on his face as he places the slice of the precious camembert onto his plate.

You wanted to smack the smirk off his stupid face. Maybe smash your lips against his before you did so.

But all you could do was blink.

“Camembert,” Seungmin states matter-of-factly, holding up a slice in his hand. You aren’t sure if you should look at the cheese or at him. “Your favourite, right?”

You look down at your plate, biting your lip to keep yourself from smiling.

Seungmin bends down, smirking when he sees your flustered state. “Hey,” he chuckles, sending your stomach into knots before you could even get food in it. “Earth to Y/N…”

You blink and blink again before making eye contact with him, and he still has that brazen smile on his face. You aren’t sure how you still aren’t used to him looking at you like that. Like you’re the only two people in the room and how it could all change so instantly and you’d still be the one left in this haze of rose. 

“Here,” he says, taking a piece from his plate and putting it on yours. You look between the slice of camembert and him, and he smiles at you over his shoulder as he struts over to his seat.

You’re left there standing in shock, blinking as you try to wrap your head around what happened.

“Did I really just see that?” Gwen asks as she steps next to you. 

Then your rose glasses start to crack and streams of real light come through. 

“Uh..” you clear your throat. “Yeah, that happened.” 

“So have you, uh, spoken to him since?” Gwen begins to ask and you quickly shake your head. 

“Nope.”

“Ah,” Gwen responds as she starts to pick up her own pieces of cheese. 

Looking over your shoulder, your eyes scan the surrounding area and your eyes widen as you find Seungmin already looking in your direction– the same brazen smile still plastered on his face. 

You turn away when you see him laugh to himself and look down at his plate. “I’m– I’m going to sit back down.” 

Gwen hums in acknowledgement and you quickly rush back to your seat next to Felix and Jisung. Placing your plate down, you slip into your seat. 

“Lover of cheese huh?” Felix laughs, looking down at your plate. Picking up a piece and placing it in your mouth with a happy hum, you nod your head. 

“Call it a passion of mine,” you say, covering your mouth. 

“Gosh,” Jisung groans from next to you. “Don’t get her started, she’ll talk about it all day.” 

Throwing your head back laughing at his comment, you can’t even begin to deny it. “I’m passionate,” you respond with a smile. 

Looking at you with a blank face, Jisung blinks. “You’re obsessed.” 

“Devoted,” you fight, sounding out the syllables.

“Obsessed,” Jisung repeats, copying your actions. 

You make a face at him before plopping another piece of cheese in your mouth and chewing away happily.

Your eyes scan the surrounding area and you feel yourself straightening up when your eyes land on Seungmin. He’s already looking at you, and you can’t tell if he looks annoyed or maybe even jealous about sitting so far away from you.

You simply turn back to Felix, propping your chin on your palm. “Now, where were we?”

“Here we go,” Jisung mutters.

You nudge him with your elbow before continuing. “Anyways… Yes, I do love cheese. But not as much as—”

“Y/N,” Jisung whines.

“Jisung!” You plaster on a cheesy grin, blinking one too many times as you turn your head to him. “Why don’t you tell them about your so-called ‘passion’,” you say, making air-quotes around “passion”, “for coffee?”

Jisung just glares at you. He keeps a straight face, but you can see the tips of his ears turning red. “You know that’s different, Y/N.”

You raise an eyebrow. “Okay, and how many cups of americano have you had this week?

“Wh– I–” he sputters. “Like, six?”

You say nothing, and just maintain your gaze on him.

“…teen.”

You smile smugly. “Mhm. And somehow I’m the obsessed one.”

Something white falls in the corner of your eye. Looking back at your plate, you don’t notice anything different, except for a piece of camembert that must have rolled off your plate. You shrug and pop it into your mouth; you did have a comically large pile of it to work through, so it was more than plausible.

You look back up, and Jisung is staring above your head with furrowed eyebrows. You follow his gaze and see… a ceiling. You wonder how many of those sixteen cups of americano were from today alone.

Felix, who also seems to have spaced out for a second, looks back at Jisung. “It’s okay, man,” he chuckles, “I had, like, three cups of coffee this morning.”

“A man of culture,” Jisung nods happily, motioning to the blonde boy with a smile. 

Felix laughs, nodding his own head. “Of course, man, I need the caffeine to survive, especially with my classes.” 

“Teacher or student?” You ask. 

Somehow, and you’re not sure how, but Felix’s smile seems to grow wider. 

“Both actually,” he hums. “Well if you class it as both I guess.” 

Raising an eyebrow for him to continue, he does. 

“I’m a student teacher, currently on placement in a nursery school, but I took a week off to be here,” 

“That’s so sweet!” You smile, “Working with kids fun?” 

Felix nods again, “Kids are just amazing,” He laughs. “Every day is different and they’re so out there, you know? It’s really a fulfilling position.” 

“Sounds like you want a bunch of your own then?” You giggle, causing a pink tint to cross Felix’s face. 

He shrugs, before spluttering, “I-I don’t know, m-maybe?!” 

“Well, I’m sure whoever you’d be with would be very lucky.” You continue to giggle, nodding your head. 

Felix’s blush deepens and he nods his head shyly. 

“How about you? Seeing stuff like that in your future?” 

You shrug, picking up another piece of cheese from your plate before putting it into your mouth. You let it rest there for a moment, giving yourself time to think before you swallow. 

“Maybe,” you take a deep breath in and let it out as you look over to Felix. “I don’t know what’s in my cards yet, so maybe.” You shrug. 

“That’s a chill way to think about it,” he smiles. 

“Thanks,” you laugh. “I feel like it’s less pressuring that way you know?” 

He hums, nodding his head in agreement. “Oh yeah, for sure, everything should be done at your own pace.” 

“True, plus I haven’t even graduated yet so, I think I’ll focus on this hurdle before I think about another one that might not even happen yet.” 

Another white object falls, and this time you look up in time to catch a hand above you before its owner pulls it back. Letting your eyes fall back to your plate, there was an additional piece of camembert on top of the few cheeses you had left. You wouldn’t have questioned it this time if you hadn’t already finished the camembert you brought with you.

Your face contorts in confusion as your gaze settles on Seungmin, who barely acknowledges you as he pulls his hand away and continues to make his way around the table and to his seat. 

You blink as your eyes follow him, with your mouth open slightly in shock. 

“I thought you said it was complicated?” Felix chuckles, snapping you out of your daze. 

You nod, trying to get your brain to make a coherent thought. “It is…. We are.” 

Jisung snorts from next to you and leans to the side slightly so Felix can see him properly. “Trust me, as someone who’s seen it all since high school, complicated is putting it simply.” 

“You’re one to talk,” you mutter, shoving another piece of camembert into your mouth. 

“He’s been dropping cheese off to you like your cheese fairy godmother,” Felix chuckles again. 

“Don’t you mean fairy godfather?” Jisung asks. 

“Fairy godperson?” Felix responds. 

“Personal preference,” you shrug, “anyway, we shouldn’t let him cloud our minds with his confusing actions.” 

“Are you talking to us or yourself there?” Jisung chuckles, making you roll your eyes and playfully slap his arm. 

“Shut up Ji.”

Letting out a breath of air, you lean forward and quickly take another piece of cheese from your plate.

“I’m just saying, I don’t have an americano fairy godperson,” Jisung says matter-of-factly, leaning back into his seat. 

You just stare at him incredulously, blindly stuffing another piece of cheese into your mouth. “How would that even work?”

He shrugs. “Maybe they have a cup of coffee ready for me in the morning?”

Swallowing the piece in your mouth, you don’t break your stare. The thought of this magical fairy godperson having to memorize Jisung’s coffee order makes you feel sorry for them. You tried it once, and never again.

“Maybe they just pour coffee into your mouth,” Felix chimes in.

You snort, rolling your eyes. “That’s almost worse, it’s like a mama bird throwing up in its baby’s mouth.”

Closing your eyes, open your mouth and tilt your head up, as if to mimic the hypothetical baby bird. After a few seconds, you feel something land in your mouth, causing your eyes to shoot open and you sit up.

You pat on your chest and quickly clear your throat. You bite down on what you can taste is cheese and swallow. 

“That’s not how it went in the dream went,” you mutter to yourself as you lean back in your chair. 

Jisung from beside you blinks, his mouth wide. “Huh?!” 

Your eyes widen for a moment before your face breaks out into a smile at the boys confusion. 

“Like,” he leans forward and whispers. “Sexual?” 

You also lean forward, making him more intrigued, “Yes.” 

His mouth open and closes like a fish, “that doesn’t answer my question?!” 

“But do you really want the answer to that question though?” You ask, with a pessimistic look on your face. 

“Yes and no,” Jisung answers almost immediately. 

However, Jisung’s train of thought gets cut short when Gwen kneels down in between you two, her hand on either one of your chairs. “I’m sorry, but did I just see that right? Did he just feed you?” 

“He’s been feeding her all night,” Jisung hisses. “Did you know she’s had a sex dream about seungmin and cheese?!” 

Gwen rolls her eyes, “They’ve had sex before, of course, she’s had the cheese sex dream about him.” 

“Um, what?!” Jisung gasps as he continues to whisper. “You’ve had it with more people than just him?” 

This time it’s you that sending him a confused look. “Wait, is this about sex in general or the cheese sex dream?”

“I-” Jisung gasps. “I don’t know at this point, I’m so confused.” 

“Wait, that’s not why i’m here! Gwen hisses. “That weird moment at the food table and now he’s been feeding you all night? What is up with him?” 

“You tell me,” you sigh, your eyes linger on where he was currently sat, his attention on his older brother Minho and the two others sat across from him. 

“If I could give my two cents,” Felix leans behind your chair for the three of you to hear. “I’m Felix, by the way,” he smiles at Gwen and offers his hand for her to shake. 

“Oh, hi! I’m Gwen!” 

Their hands part and Felix clears his throat. “I don’t know what happened for things to be as complicated as you say they are, but he obviously has some unresolved feelings for you.” 

“How can you tell?” you ask. 

“Because adults are just overgrown children and I work with children every day,” Felix explains. “He uses these little things to keep your attention, any sign of that attention going away, he comes back and does it again.” 

“How are you so sure?” 

The side of Felix’s lips tilt up into a smirk. He shots a look, over to Seungmin and his smirk grows widen when he notices the boy is looking over at the four of them. “Eat the rest of your cheese quick,” he looks at you again. “I’ll prove it to you.” Looking over at Gwen, he smiles. “Gwen, you go back to your seat and act natural, you guys will see what I mean.” 

You do as he instructs, eating the rest of your cheese (even though you didn’t have much left anyway). After you plop the last piece into your mouth, you smile and hum. 

You loved cheese so much. 

You look over to Felix with a small smile. “Finished.”

“You can have some of mine,” Felix smiles and says slightly louder than normal, sliding his own plate over to you. “You are more of a cheese fanatic than I am, so you deserve it.” 

You exaggerate your pout as you look at him. “You’re my new favourite person Felix.” 

Even though it was an act, a pink blush still covers his cheeks as he brushes you off with a wave of his hand. “It’s fine, you’ll enjoy it more than I will anyway so go ahead.”

It’s maybe only thirty seconds later that a paper plate filled with different types of cheese– noticeably more camembert than the rest– appears beside you. Looking up quickly, you catch Seungmin with a scowl on his lips. 

“Here,” he mumbles quickly, before walking back around to his chair without a second to spare. 

Felix snorts, leaning backwards to send a look at Jisung and Gwen, and mouths ‘i told you’. 

“Okay,” you mumble. “Maybe you’re on to something.”

 In the next second, Gwen is back down kneeled beside you. “That was insane,” she gasps. 

“I don’t get it,” you huff. “He was the one that didn’t want anything official in the first place.” you mumble the last part, your eyes fixed on the plate with the mountain of cheese on. 

“It’s been three years,” Jisung starts. “People and their feelings can change.” 

“But…” what about what he said last night? Just for tonight? 

His words were one thing, but then his actions completely different. His words were, one time only, but his actions and the way your friends, and new friend, spoke about them, said that it was more than that. 

Why couldn’t you just read minds? You thought to yourself, at least then you’d maybe be able to tell what he was thinking half of the time. 

Looking at Gwen, you frown.

“Maybe,” Gwen sighs. “Maybe try talking to him,” her gaze narrows on you. “Properly this time.” 

Your cheeks begin to heat up and you nod. Looking at Gwen, you notice her gaze is elsewhere causing you to follow it and that’s when you see Mina talking to Seungmin. Every now and then he rolls his eyes, almost like he doesn’t like her words. 

“Maybe he’s being told the same thing,” Gwen says, patting your shoulder. 

You shrug, maintaining your gaze on Seungmin as you bring a piece of camembert into your mouth. Maybe this was a sign to talk to him.

Maybe you could give him another chance.

→→

seungmin casually slides into his chair, a smirk present on his lips as he picks at his now full plate. 

"What are you doing?" Mina's voice, fills Seungmin's ears and he tilts his head at her in false confusion. 

"What do you mean?" Mina's face is blank as she blinks. 

"Just casually dropping off cheese?" 

"No," he responds as he takes a bite of a piece of his food. "Just need to get my steps in." 

"You're full of shit Seung, seriously," she sighs. 

His eyes move to you and he watches how you speak with Jisung and whom he came to learn was Felix. He notices how Gwen leaves her seat to crouch behind you. But ultimately, he notices how Felix stares at him, his own smirk twisted into his lips. Seungmin's eyes narrows as he looks at the boy and he rolls his eyes at how Felix's laugh seems to make you smile. 

His eyes go back to you and he watches as you turn to eat the rest of the cheese on your plate and once you are in fact done. Felix smiles and moves his own closer to you. 

“You can have some of mine,” Felix's voice fills Seungmin's ears and he gets up suddenly, causing both Mina and Minho to look at him. Felix's voice still echoing in his ears. “You are more of a cheese fanatic than I am, so you deserve it.” 

He gets to the food table, grabs a paper plate and starts to put all of his annoyed emotions into putting the new pieces of cheese onto the plate. He wanted to say to say sorry to the cheese for being so mean, but he just resulted to rolling his eyes when your voice fills his ears. “You’re my new favourite person Felix.” 

Silently making fun of the way you said it, he rolls his eyes again before turning around. “It’s fine, you’ll enjoy it more than I will anyway so go ahead.” 

He takes the few steps over to where you're sat next to Felix and leans over and drops the plate onto the table. 

"Here," he mumbles and he doesn't leave you a second to process and respond.

Quickly walking back around to his seat, he drops into it with his arms crossed. He stares at his own plate on his table and just by the way he hears Mina sigh and turn to him, he knows he's in for it. 

"You seriously just can't keep chill can you?" Mina asks, clicking her tongue. 

Keeping his eyes on his plate, his jaw tightens. "What do you mean?" 

"Don't do this Seungmin, not right now, this is the rehearsal dinner for my wedding!" She says emphasising the word wedding. "Don't go and try and make things awkward not just for us but for her and everyone else here." 

Seungmin's eyes look up at his older sister. "I'm not trying to make things awkward." 

Mina rolls her eyes. "You're still full of shit Seungmin and you know that. You know what you're doing and you know why you're doing it." 

Seungmin rolls his eyes and he goes to open his mouth to speak, but Mina cuts him off. 

"No, you don't talk until I'm finished." Mina glares. "Now this is my wedding, you're not going to play your mind games with her. you're not going to have her regret coming and ruining this as a memory for not only her, but for me as well. I don't care if you think I'm being a bitch here, but you sort your shit out. If you really want to fix things, you don't do it like this. If you really want to fix things, you don't sleep with her on the first night of seeing each other again in hopes of it just making things go away and making it better. It doesn't work like that." Mina exclaims, causing Seungmin to shrink in his seat.

 He didn't know she knew about that. 

Mina sighs and frowns at her younger brother. "I love you, I really do, but you have to remember everything that happened back then was because you decided for it to happen that way. Take responsibility for it if you want things to be different with her." Mina suggests, she then laughs, trying to lighten the mood. "However, I don't know why you had to pick my wedding was the right time for it."

He tries to smile as he looks up at Mina, "I'm sorry." 

Mina leans forward and messes playfully with his hair causing him to try and push her hands away. "You're my little brother and I love and support you," Mina starts, however Seungmin knew this was too good to be true. She wouldn't just praise him so casually. "But you're so fucking stupid sometimes, I mean, I love it for you, but gosh Seungmin." 

there it was. 

"Ouch, but I love you too I guess." Seungmin responds. 

"Of course you do," Mina laughs. "I tell you the truth and you know that asshole would just laugh at you." Mina's eyes flickers to Minho, who's still focused on the other two men sat across from him. 

Seungmin joins in on her laughter and nods his head. "True." 

"Just," Mina sighs. "If you really want something, go for it. If you really want something with her. Tell her, don't continue to be that dumb high school kid you were and be truthful with her and lay it all out on the table." 

"Okay," Seungmin hums. "I'll talk to her."

→→

You're slow to leave the dining hall after the rehearsal dinner, too caught up in chatting to Felix, Jisung and Gwen that you're one of the last sets of people to leave. You trailed out behind Gwen and Jisung with Felix by your side as you continued to laugh at Felix's jokes. 

You came to a stop, however, when you saw Seungmin casually leaning up against the wall out in the hallway. When he notices you, he stands quickly and takes the few steps towards you, nodding slightly at Felix. 

Patting your shoulder, Felix smiles, "I'll catch up with you later." 

Inhale, exhale. 

You nod, sending a similar smile to the boy beside you. "Okay, see you later." 

As you watched him walk away, you took the moment to prepare yourself mentally before you turned to face Seungmin. 

His hair is messier, like he's run his hands through it a thousand times whilst he was waiting for you to come out into the hallway. And his tie, once neatly laid out was now pulled loose and his top button of his white shirt was undone. 

"Seungmin," you take another breath. "What do you need?" 

"To talk to you," he starts. "about everything." 

"Everything?" you question. "Like how you tried to choke me out with cheese today?" 

A chuckle escaped the boys mouth, his lips turned up into a smile. "You know you wouldn't be mad about it if it happened." 

You snorted as you tried your best to fight off a smile. "What do you want, Seungmin? Seriously." 

"About us," Seungmin takes a step forward. "I mean it, I-" 

Seungmin pauses mid-sentence like his brain had just up and paused on him. There was a look in his eyes that you couldn't quite figure out and when he opens his mouth to speak once more, he sighs. 

"I don't want it to be just for tonight– well last night." He blushes, closing his eyes to avoid having to see your reaction. 

"What?" You gasp. "Seungmin..." 

You couldn't help but feel an odd sense of reversed deja vu. 

“Look, I know it probably doesn’t make sense, after everything that happened between us, but…” Seungmin pauses to take a deep breath. 

Your breath hitches in your throat. Something in you tells you that you know where this is going. 

But it can’t go that way. You know it deep down. As much as your body screams at you to give in right then and there, your brain screams over it.

“Seungmin…” you breathe out. Your eyes flick to the floor, then back to him.

You use every fibre of your being to stop yourself from stepping closer to him. Even after all these years, he was intoxicating—the right look from him could make you weak in the knees, turning you into putty. It was a mystery how you made it through the dinner.

Seungmin notices your hesitation, and gently lifts your chin up with two fingers. He then moves his hand so it’s cupping your cheek. The look he gives you is so tender, warmth pooling in his eyes, that you have to glance back down to compose yourself.

You dare to look up again, and something in you snaps. Before you could even think about what you’re doing, your hand slowly makes it’s way up his arm before going around the back of his neck.

It truly was a mystery how you made it through the dinner, you thought for a split second. But it all goes to static when you pull him against you and press his lips to his. 

His lips are chapped, like he had been nibbling on them as he waited for you. You don’t care as much as the kiss in itself is soft, sweet and a feeling swirled in your stomach like you had successfully gotten your next fix.

It quickly changes however, when his hands land on your hips, and it’s like electric shocks are sent all over your body. Sighing into the kiss, he takes the chance to overpower you and without little hassle, you let him. All you do instead is pull him closer to you– if it was even physically possible. 

“I still need to talk to you,” He pulls back slightly and mumbles against your lips. You quickly cut him short with another kiss.

“This,” kiss. “Isn’t,” another kiss. “Talking.” 

You’re doing everything you can to try and get him to stop thinking and to just solely focus on the act of kissing you. Moving your lips swiftly to his neck, you’re sure he can feel your smirk against his skin and you feverishly place kisses up and along his neck and jaw line.

“We can talk later,” he moans.

Taking your face in his hands, he angles you once again so you’re looking at him, smashing his lips to yours again, and you can’t think straight. It takes only mere seconds for you to full loose all thoughts of right or wrong.

You know what? Maybe one more night won’t hurt.

→→

You stare at the words that were displayed on your beat up flip up phone as you felt whatever vice was around your heart tighten. 

Mina: 11:45 am

Look, I didn’t want to be the one to tell you this, but since he obviously isn’t going to tell you himself… Seungmin’s leaving for college. 

I tried to get him to tell you.

You felt your throat tighten and you did your best to clear it by patting on your chest causing you to cough. 

Pushing yourself away from your desk with your hands, you rise to your feet, before rushing out of your bedroom door, down the stairs and out of the door and away from your house in only a matter of seconds.

You could hear your parents calling out behind you, lost for words, but that didn't concern you at that moment. Not when seungmin was leaving and the only reason you knew was because his older sister was nice enough to tell you. Not even seungmin himself could get the courage to tell you- to break down his own walls ever so slightly just to give you the decency of telling you: hey, i'm leaving. 

Haphazardly typing out a response to Mina, you hit send and shove your phone into your pocket as you continue to run as fast as you could to their house. 

The adrenaline over powers the fact that you want nothing more badly as to cry. To break down and to scream to the world, to him, until your throat went dry and your lungs hurt. Because no matter how little or much he shared with others. no matter how much or how little he wanted to show the world that he cared, he still did. How, even after so many months of secrecy and silent wishes, he was more than just a senior year crush. 

He was more than just a mere moment in time. 

He was powerful, moving, frustrating in all of the best ways. He was addicting and even though he broke your heart every time he said he didn't want anyone to know about the both of you, you still foolishly stayed. Because you'd rather break your heart a thousand times by him than to never experience his love, even if it's not fully and out loud. No matter the odd and secretive the ways he seemed to share it. 

Because in those secret moments, the ones where it was you two vs the world. Where he looked at you like you had hung the stars in the sky especially for him. He made all of the pain worth it, made all of the crying into ice cream tubs at two in the morning worth it. 

Sure, maybe it didn't make sense, but nothing made sense about him. Ever. You could never fully wrap your head around the enigma that is Kim Seungmin, but you knew, if you had the chance, you’d want to spend as much time as possible trying to.

Your feet stop once you're outside of his house and whatever adrenaline you have seems to wear off as the tight feeling returns to your throat. You see movement through the living room window and even when your mind screams at you to flee, your feet carry you forward up the footpath and onto the main porch. 

The ever familiar white door is a looming presence. It’s silently taunting you, beckoning you to knock on its wooden surface and face the boy who was about to be ripped from your world. Or don’t. You could just go home for all he cared, go back to your fantasy world where Seungmin will always be around, only to shatter your own heart when you finally wake up.

It was like some screwed up form of Schrodinger's cat—no matter what you do, you know you’re going to lose.

Maybe that is what compels you to stay long enough for Minho to open the door, a confused but content smile on his face.

"Oh, y/n, hi!" 

You attempt to smile, but it falters, "Hey."

Whether or not he notices, he doesn’t say, which you’re thankful for.

“Here for Seung?” The older boy asks, causing your cheeks to heat up as you nod quickly. Minho hums before calling out behind him for Seungmin. “Come inside, it’s getting cold.” 

“Yeah…” Seungmin’s voice softens as he looks up and sees you, standing beside Minho. “Y/N…” 

Gulping, you wave before pushing your lips into a thin line. 

“I’ll leave you two alone,” Minho says, before turning to you and tapping your shoulder. “It was good to see you.” 

You nod simply, trying your best to smile as your gaze soon moves back towards Seungmin. He’s standing at the bottom of the stairs, his arms crossed over his chest. His eyes are looking in any direction that isn’t you. 

“What are you doing here?” 

Ignoring his question, you respond with your own. “Are you really leaving?” 

His head shoots up in surprise and the look on his face alone is enough confirmation, but it tugs at your heartstrings more when he asks.

“How did you know?” 

“So you weren’t even going to tell me?” Your face twists into a frown as you blink to try and stop your eyes from feeling glassy. “Do you care so little about me that you wouldn’t even tell me?” 

“How did you find out?” He rephrases his question from before as his eyes stayed on you. Boring into you like he was trying to find the centre of your soul. 

“Is that all you care about right now?” You scoff. “You care more about me finding out you’re leaving than actually telling me yourself?” You blink away the tears that had threatened to fall. This time, you were the one to look anywhere but at him. “Did none of our moments together mean anything to you?” 

You can’t tell if he’s deflecting, unwilling to answer your question or if he truly cares so little about the almost full year you had spent together. 

“That’s just what they are though,” Seungmin sighed. “Moments in time,” he crosses his arm over his chest and metaphorically sticks a knife through your chest. “But moments pass, and this is one of those moments.” 

“So they really didn’t mean anything huh?” you tsk to yourself, shaking your head lightly. “I can’t believe I’m actually going to ask, but, did I even mean anything to you?” 

“Of course, you meant something to me, you’re a great friend.” Now he’s cauterising the wound, whilst trying to shove the knife in deeper. 

It’s funny how someone in one moment could be beginning for your affection, only to stab you in the back the next. But it wasn’t just stabbing you in the back, it was full hung drawn and quartered. He was pulling the emotions out of you, the memories and tearing them to shreds in front of you like a child would rip open the wrapping paper on their presents on Christmas morning. 

“Friends, really?” you huff, “to you, we’re only just friends? Do friends really do everything we did together?” 

Seungmin slips his hands into the back pocket of his jeans as he shrugs. “Some friends might, who am I to judge?” 

“So you really wouldn’t care if I did all of the things I did with you with someone else? You know, 'cause that’s what friends do apparently.” You suggest.

Seungmin falters, his jaw tightening for a second before he relaxes. There’s something that flashes in his eyes that you can’t figure out and he just hallowly laughs.

“Of course not,” Seungmin mutters. “You can do whatever you want.” 

“So would it be wrong of me to assume that you did this with your other ‘friends’ too?” You felt a bubble get caught in your throat as you tried to keep your voice from failing. “Is that why you never wanted anyone else to know? Cause you had other ‘friends’?” 

Seungmin pauses as his eyes bore into yours. You want to look away, but something inside of you physically stops you from doing so. 

He stays quiet for the longest few seconds of your life before you attempt to speak again. “Can you at least-” 

“No,” he cuts you off, clearing his throat. “It was just you. I wasn’t and didn’t see anyone else.” 

“Were you embarrassed by me?” 

He shakes his head almost instantly and the more he speaks, the more utterly confused you’re getting. 

“No,” he says simply. “What’s there to be embarrassed about?” 

“You– You–” your mind stutters. “You confuse me so much. If it wasn’t because there was someone else and it wasn’t because you were embarrassed about me, then why? Why didn’t you want anyone else to know?” 

Seungmin sighs the heaviest sigh you think you’ve ever heard. It’s almost like he’s tired of repeating himself without ever actually repeating what he means. 

“Because like you said, they were moments in time, moments we shared together, but that doesn’t mean everyone needs to be aware of them.” Seungmin attempts to explain. 

“Not even the people that would be happy for you? Care for you and want you to succeed?” 

Seungmin shrugs his shoulders once more. He’s so casual about the whole thing that it’s like a stark difference to the Seungmin he showed you in secret, the Seungmin that only you saw. 

At this point, you couldn’t tell if you had gone numb to all of your emotions, or if you were reaching the breaking point. “You really just don’t care do you?” 

“I didn’t say that” Seungmin responds rather quickly. 

“You did,” you say twice as fast.

“I didn’t” Seungmin rebuts.

“You did, you said moments pass and that ours passed. Make it make sense?” You beg, you could accept any bit of explanation at this point. Especially if it cleared up how he was feeling and made you less confused. 

However, Seungmin couldn’t do that. He just had to add more questions than answers. It was like he couldn’t help himself.

“That doesn’t mean it didn’t mean something to me.”

“Well, it meant everything to *me*, Seungmin. Don’t you get it?” Running a hand through your hair in an attempt to get it out of your face, you let a groan escape your lips. “I did everything you asked of me. I didn’t tell anyone, I snuck around for you, I let my grades slip and my friends worry about me because of you. I waited and waited because at first, I thought, this is new. It’s fine if he doesn’t want to tell anyone right away. Let us just find our place together, to make sure we actually worked well together and then maybe he’ll be comfortable sharing with at least our friends, but then I kept waiting because I care so much about you and about every single moment that we spent together and how much I didn’t want them to end that I thought that just keeping silent and continuing to wait would be enough. And it’s the fact that I’m so foolish that I could wait for you forever if you asked me to because that’s how much I love you, Kim Seungmin.” 

You only notice the tears spilling down your cheeks when you begin to taste the saltiness on your lips. 

“Love?” He whispers. “You love me?” 

Taking in a deep breath, you wipe your cheeks and find the courage inside to look at him. His eyes are soft and red like he has his own tears welling up. Your frown deepens, “would it really make a difference if I did at this point?” 

“Y/N, I…” Seungmin pauses. He opens his mouth like a fish out of water but soon finds his words. “I thought we agreed, we were just having some fun, nothing serious.” 

“I never agreed to that Seungmin,” you hiccup. “I just let myself get carried away with you because I always hoped it would change.”

As he takes a step forward, you take one back closer to his front door. 

“Do you really love me?” He asks, his voice almost sounding sincere. 

Nodding, the tears rolling down your cheeks, drop onto the floor below you. 

“I do, so goddamn much and I see now how much of a fool I was to get swept up with you.” You laugh a laugh so hollow, your soul hurts. “I’m sorry and I hope college treats you well Seungmin,” sighing, you turn and open the door. “I really do.” 

Shutting his front door behind you, your feet once again carry you down the path and you stop once it connects to the main pavement. 

Just like all those months before, you stand there, waiting– wishing for him to come outside and to bring you into his arms as he screams about how much he loves you, but just like then, he doesn’t. 

You’re left alone with your sweater paw covering your mouth in hopes of muffling your cries. 

→→

It was Seungmin pulling you closer to him that caused you to stir and wake up and it was you shooting up in bed that caused him to groan and open his eyes groggily. 

“What are you doing?” he yawns, attempting to grab you and pull you back towards him. 

"I- I should," you move just out of the way of his fingertips. "I should go back to my room, the wedding is later." 

As you're looking around for your items of clothing, Seungmin sits up. 

"No wait, just stay here and go later, we still have time." he tries to reason with you, but you just shake your head. "Come on, lets go back to sleep." 

"I shouldn't, Seungmin," you mutter, slipping back into your clothes from last night. 

Seungmin gets up, finds some of his own clothes before he turns to face you. "Why not? what's wrong?" 

"It's just… this," you motion between you two as he steps towards you. "Us, everything about this."

 "Y/N," 

Groaning, you can't stop yourself from speaking. "And I hate it when you say my name like that!" 

"What's going on? Just talk to me please." 

"You, Seungmin, you're just so confusing to me like a fucking enigma." you scoff. "You’re the one that never wanted to be open before, you said we had a moment and that it passed and now here we are now. Now you're acting sweet, you're trying to have my attention on you 24/7, you're feeding me cheese knowing it's my favourite, but then you say things like how you only want to be with me for the night, or for the weekend?” 

You look around the room before your eyes meets his and you continue your speech.

“You say my name in the way you used to say it before, like how we weren't on the same page, saying my name in a tone like you were letting me down easy and I don't want to go through that again, Min." you slip up at the nickname. "I never wanted just for the night, just for the weekend. I wanted forever then and even after all this time, i'm still a fool for wanting it now."

“Y/N, wait–” 

Seungmin attempts to speak, but you cut him off before he gets the chance to say another word. 

“And you’re asking me to stay with you, to go back to sleep beside you in your arms. I just can’t stop thinking about how after today, we’ll part and it’ll be just like it was back then, another passing moment.” You gulp and look down, hoping he doesn’t see your lips waver. “I don’t think my heart can take it.” 

Seungmin gently tilts your chin up, forcing your eyes to meet his once more. His gaze is soft, his chestnut eyes swimming with a kind of warmth that almost makes you want to run back into his arms right there.

“Y/N, this…” his voice is soft, and his thumb is rubbing gentle circles on your cheek. You can’t help but lean into his hand. “This isn’t just a moment.”

Your breath hitches in your throat. You almost do throw yourself into him, you’re this close. You want so badly to just give into him for the third time, but the memories come back flooding to you before you can try.

You let out a shaky breath, and you have to move his hand away in order to get your next words out.

“Then what was it last time?”

Seungmin stays silent. His lips are parted as if he’s going to speak, but no words leave his throat. You search his eyes for an answer, noticing a mixture of surprise and shock for a second, then a flash of regret. He casts his gaze down, blinking a few times to recompose himself before looking back up at you.

An uncomfortable silence hangs in the air. Your stare shifts from his eyes to his lips and back as you wait for him to speak. But still, nothing comes out. Your chest tightens at the lack of response.

A minute passes by, and Seungmin still hasn’t uttered a word. You feel crushed under the silence, physically and emotionally, and your body scrambles to find a way out before your brain can catch up.

“Wait, Y/N—” Seungmin mumbles, grabbing your hand before you can step away from him. You bite the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from looking.

“Seungmin, I can’t.”

“Yes you can,” he pleas. You don’t need to turn your head to know he’s giving you that soft, desperate look. Those goddamn fucking puppy dog eyes you always fell for in the past, and you knew if you even dared to look, you’d fall for it again.

“I can’t.” You say, shaking your hand to loosen his grip on it and begin to gather the rest of your things. “You can’t even say a word to me.”

“I am right now,” Seungmin grabs your hand one more time and succeeds in making you turn around this time. 

You huff, letting your eyes trail up to this. “Okay, then tell me. If this isn’t another passing moment to you, then what was it last time?”

You clutch your purse in your hand, watching him expectantly for an answer. But another silence fills the air, and this one is louder than ever.

You don’t let the silence go on as long this time. Instead, you sling your purse over your shoulder, grabbing the rest of your things as you storm out of the room.

“I’ll see you at the wedding, Seungmin,” you say, and you turn to look back at him one more time. It takes everything in you to keep yourself from running back once you see the regret etched on his face. “Let me know if you ever have an actual answer for me.”

→→

“Now introducing, Mr. and Mrs. Bang!” 

The room bursts into applause and as he watches his older sister gaze at the love of her life, happiness begins to overflow in Seungmin’s chest. For years, he’s watched Mina adorn pages in her journal, and, the minute she had access to a smartphone, her Pinterest, with ideas of her dream wedding. She had every little detail laid out—from the sequins on her dress to the exact shade of the streamers that graced the walls of the venue. It made him roll his eyes at the time, but to see everything actually come to life with the man of his sister’s dreams, it now makes his heart swell with pride.

As Mina interlocks with her fingers with Chan’s, the audience stands up to watch the newlyweds walk back down the aisle, time seems to slow down for Seungmin. He follows her as she swings her hands with her new husband, her eyes all sparkly as she looks around at all her loved ones. As happy as he is for her, he can’t help but feel the slightest twinge of envy. It sounds bad to say on his sister’s literal wedding day, but he can’t deny it anymore.

Especially not after seeing Y/N again.

But Seungmin knows there’s a time and place for his feelings now, and his sister’s special day is not one of them. So he swallows it down, and, as the attendees follow the couple out to the reception, he gently pushes through the crowd to meet Mina up at the front.

Seeing his sister so happy up close seems to bring back the warmth pooling in his stomach. “You… you look beautiful.” 

Mina sends him a closed-eyed smile, patting Seungmin’s arm with her free hand. “Thank you. And thank you for being here.” 

“I wouldn’t miss it.” 

As Mina looks up at Seungmin, she can’t help but feel a sense of pride at how grown up her baby brother seemed to be and how much he had changed compared to his high school self. 

Mina’s smile grew wider as did Seungmin’s, “I’m really proud of you, by the way,” 

Seungmin feels his cheeks heat up and he scratches the back of his neck awkwardly. “This is meant to be about you,” 

Rolling her eyes, Mina chuckles. “It is, but it doesn’t mean I can’t praise my baby brother does it?” 

Seungmin’s eyes furrow together partly because of the question, but also because of the baby brother. “I’m not a baby.” 

Shaking her head, she gazes at her new husband quickly before looking back at Seungmin. “I don’t know. Your new brother-in-law would say otherwise.”

“That’s because he’s like 100 years old and everyone is baby to him,” Seungmin mutters, rolling his eyes. Mina slaps his arm, narrowing her eyes at her younger brother. 

“He’s 26, don’t be dramatic.” 

“My point still stands,” Seungmin continues to mutter, shoving his hands into his trouser pockets. 

Seungmin lets out a silent sigh as his eyes flicker around the room. His shoulders dropping slightly when he can’t seem to find the person he;s looking for: you. 

“Why the long face?��� Mina asks, “Looking for someone?” 

Seungmin nods silently, his eyes still checking around the room for you. 

“For Y/N?” Mina questions. 

Seungmin clears his throat, his ears feeling the heat. 

“Maybe…” 

“Oh…” Mina’s voice drops. “You just missed her. She caught me just a minute ago and said she wasn’t feeling good. she just congratulated me and left.” 

Seungmin’s shoulders drop and he does his best to smile at Mina. 

Mina smiles wider, in hopes of calming him, maybe even giving him some hope. “You could go ask Gwen? She’s sharing a room with her anyway, so i’m sure she’ll know more than I do.” 

Seungmin nods quickly, a hopeful smile indeed covering his face. 

When his eyes focus on Mina again, she’s already looking over her shoulder, lovingly gazing at Chan as he’s chatting with Felix and another blonde that Seungmin didn’t know the name of. 

“I don’t want to keep you,” Seungmin pats Mina’s shoulder. “Get back over to the love of your life.” 

Mina’s grin widens at the words love of your life as she nods. Seungmin could practically see the hearts floating above her head. 

“I’ll talk to you later,” Seungmin laughs and Mina just hums before she parts from Seungmin and wraps her arms around Chan’s waist when she gets close to him. Seungmin watches as Chan turns to her, his own dopey smile on his lips as he places a kiss on her hairline. 

After a moment, Seungmin inhales deeply and his eyes scan the room for his new target, Gwen. She was honestly pretty easy to find, especially when she had the loud-mouth Jisung by her side–constantly. 

When he sets his sights on Gwen and Jisung, Gwen is leant up against the wall and Jisung is basically hopping in place beside her. A concerned frown is etched into Gwen’s face and Jisung is doing his best, albeit not very well, to cheer her up. 

“Gwen, Jisung!” Seungmin calls out as he soon stops in front of them. 

Gwen stands instantly, her concerned frown now in a forced smile. “Seungmin, what’s up?” 

“Mina told me Y/N left, do you know where she went? 

Gwen’s face fell as she turned to look at Jisung. Jisung rubs the back of his neck. 

“She left, she’s catching a train back to the city…” Jisung explains. 

Gulping, Seungmin nods his head slowly. 

“If you go now, you might be able to catch her, but you have to be quick.” 

Seungmin perks up and nods his head quickly. The hopeful smile soon appearing back on his face. “Thank you.” 

Gwen takes a deep breath and slips her hand into Jisung’s and squeezes it lightly. 

“Do you think he’ll get there in time?” Gwen asks, her eyes lingering on the space where Seungmin once was.

Jisung squeezes her hand back, “we can only hope.” 

“Yeah, lets hope.” Gwen slips her hand away from jisung’s grasp and makes her way back into the crowd. Leaving Jisung alone, staring at her with a small frown on his face and his heart missing the warmth of her hand.

Seungmin gasps for breath as he rushes out of the lobby of the hotel. Resting his hands on his knees, he frantically looks around to try and find a sign of you. However, no matter where he looked nothing seemed to appear. 

Feeling the vibrations from his phone in his pocket. He fishes it out and a text alert from Mina appears on his screen. 

Annoying Sister: 5:01 pm

She’s at central station, it leaves in an hour… Good Luck!

Seungmin smiles to himself. It’s the exact sign he needs to keep going.

→→

The small ding comes from your phone as it confirms the payment for your train ticket. Slipping it into your pocket, you smile sheepishly at the ticket attendant and take the printed-out tickets from his hands. 

With a small thank you, you take your suitcase and let it trail behind you as you slowly start to make your way over to an electronic sign board to look to see which platform your train would be leaving from. 

You were lucky enough to only have to catch one train back to the main city and from that station, you could easily catch the bus back to your apartment. Sure, it would be a long journey, especially by train, but you’d rather that than have to potentially face another awkward encounter with Seungmin after everything that had happened that morning. 

Stepping up onto the platform, you find an empty seat and pull out your phone frowning at the notifications on your lock screen. 

Gwen<3: 5:15 pm

Are you sure you want to leave? You can still ride with us in the morning…

y/nnie: 5:45 pm

Yeah, It would be best. I just don’t know if I could cope with facing him again.

Gwen<3: 5:46 pm

Okay:/ just make sure to get home safe okay? 

Angling your phone up, you try to smile as you take a quick selfie to send to her. Not really caring what it looked like, you hit send and exit out of the messages app. Pulling up the gram, you scroll through your feed, randomly liking pictures posted by the few idols you liked, the random meme pages you followed and even some distance friends you had from school that you never bothered to unfollow. 

You pause, however, when a photo of Mina and Chan appears on your timeline. In the photo, they’re gazing into each other’s eyes, loved-up dopey grins spread so wide across their faces that it reached their eyes. The caption reads three cheers for true love, and your heart can’t help but strain. 

You couldn’t help but think of Seungmin and regret– not the time you spent together, but how you spent it together. It was like a moment, and it passed by so quickly without you even stopping to think about it. How, in the beginning, you didn’t want to face him, but you found yourself getting caught up with him the moment he set his sights on you. 

You wished you could go back, but it was too late. It was too late to change what had happened. You wished you could live in this fantasy of the weekend forever. You wished you could stay beside him and lay in his arms forever. 

But the moment you would step foot on the train, everything would go back to the way it was– like nothing ever happened. There would be no Seungmin, there would be another weekend of laying in his arms and enveloping yourself in his being. 

It would go back to the daily torture of university and job searching. You would go back to wishing that you and Seungmin could be more than whatever you were. 

Wishing you could go back and relive the weekend.

Seungmin’s leg bounces up and down anxiously as he’s sat in the back of the taxi cab. Silently praying that the damn driver would just hurry up already. Cursing him out mentally for not realising how much of an emergency this was and how bad Seungmin needed to get to the train station. 

All luck seems to turn on Seungmin apparently when the cab comes to a sudden halt and a choir of car horns ring out around him– including the one from the cab he’s in. 

Leaning forward, he peers through the front window. “What’s going on?” 

“I dunno,” the driver shrugs, tapping on his steering wheel. “Traffic jam or something.” 

“How far away are we from the train station?” 

The driver looks back at him with an odd look on his face, but speaks when he sees how frantic Seungmin is. “Like ten minutes if you run?” 

Digging cash out of his wallet, Seungmin throws it at the driver before hopping out of the car at lightning speed and a keep the change falling from his lips. Ignoring the way the driver is calling after him, Seungmin is too focused on running through the packed-up street. His deep breath and the sounds of his hands hitting cars as he’s sliding through the gaps to get onto the sidewalk fill his ears. 

Seungmin is sure he’s never ran so fast in his life, but as the train station comes into view, it only pushes him to run faster. 

He pushes through the crowds of people and up to a ticket guard, his words spewing out of his mouth with little care. He haphazardly pays, grabs the tickets and runs over to the signboard.

When he finds your platform on the map, all he can do is hope he gets there on time. 

Your eyes linger on the signboard overhead of the platform as the minutes until your train arrives slowly tick away. A sudden dread fills your stomach and it’s like your body is screaming at you not to go. 

Your mind and your body still burn with the memories of Seungmin’s touch, How after one night, it was like your body became more dependent– more addicted to his touch than you had ever experienced. 

A bubble got caught in your throat as the overhead announcer called out about the arrival of your train. Your stomach drops.

You’re not ready to go back to normal life. You’re not sure if you’d ever be ready to go back to a life without Seungmin. All of your being was calling out for him– calling out for a sign to stay, for a reason to stay.

But when nothing seems to answer, you round up your bags and watch as the train slows and pulls to a stop in front of you and after a moment or two, the little buttons lit up to show it was now okay to open the train doors. 

The stinging feeling prickles your eyes as you stare at the now-open door. This was it, the return back to reality.

You lift your suitcase onto the train and step on after it. You don’t bother to attempt to wipe away the tears that fall from your eyes, not when the ones you wipe would instantly be replaced. 

A voice you recognise instantly calls out from the platform.

“WAIT!”

Seungmin just barely gets onto the train as the doors close behind him. His face is red and he’s gasping for air. 

“S-Seungmin…” You blink, your mouth agape. “What are you doing here?” 

Once he’s caught his breath, he stands up straight and looks you straight in the eyes. 

“I’m here for you,” he declares. “I’m here to talk to you.” 

You continue to look at him, waiting for him to continue. 

However, before he gets the chance, the train stutters into life, causing you to fall into Seungmin’s chest, his arms wrapping instantly around you for protection.

Pushing your lips into a thin line, you stare up at him, your heart hammering against your chest. “Say what you were going to say, Min,” 

His gaze on you softens as he takes a deep breath. “I care about you,” he exhales. “A lot.”. 

Humming, you nod. “I care about you too.” 

“No, it’s… it’s more than that.”

Seungmin opens his mouth, closes it and opens it again. It’s like he’s bringing up all of the courage he needs to say what’s really on his mind. Especially when it was too late to back out now– not that he even wanted to.

He wanted to say everything he had to say, he was going to say it.

"I've been waking up daily for the past three years wishing I could take back what I said, wishing I could take back everything. But then you were at the wedding and it was like a chance to spend time with you, to relive and to act like we were back then. It was like I was given a chance to make things right by some creature above.” Seungmin pauses, he brings up his hand to lightly brush some of your hair out of your face. 

“Min…” You start, but he shakes his head before you can even continue. 

“Wait, let me finish first?” Seungmin says as more of a question than a statement. You just nod, a small smile playing on your lips.

“I wasn't lying when I said it wasn't just a moment between us. It wasn't just a moment back then, either, and I was so stupid for running and hiding, calling it a passing moment when I knew fully well that it wasn't. It never was and it never will be. Please just… let me prove it to you.” 

You feel your heart quicken in pace as he continues his speech. His eyes are so full of love and sincerity that you don’t know how to cope. 

What Seungmin didn’t seem to know was he already had your heart, he had it ever since your senior year. 

After everything, he still meant everything.

“I was an idiotic teenager who didn't know how to face or even acknowledge what I wanted. I can't go back and change that and I’ll forever regret how I made you feel back then, but I know now I don't want to make that same mistake again, I don't want to lose my chance to be with you again. So please, can we start over?” 

His hands rest on your cheeks, making sure you’re staring into his eyes as he says his next words:

“Because Y/N, I don't just want you for tonight or for the weekend… I want you forever. ”

[gremlinist]

You tried not to scowl as you watched crush!seungmin converse with Jo Yuri.

Watching him blush and stutter nervously you forced down your jealousy. It wasn’t either of their faults you were stuck in this situation.

Downfalls of being best friends with your crush: you knew whenever THEY had a crush.

Seungmin flopped back into his seat and let out a dazed sigh. You grimaced, but rushed to school your face into a neutral expression before he looked up.

“Did you see what she was wearing? She looked so good, I can’t believe she asked me for the homework…” he gushed, completely oblivious to his best friend’s souring mood. This was a regular occurrence now, and to date he’d never once caught onto your aversion to the topic of Yuri.

You wished Seungmin would like someone who was easier to hate. Yuri was sweet, you’d known each other since middle school and had never once seen her even raise her voice. Ironically, you were the one who’d introduced her to Seungmin in the first place. Which was why you knew you had no right to feel jealous. And yet….

A familiar fluttering in your lungs made your hand fly to cover your mouth. Trying to force down what was trying to make it’s way up your windpipe you stood abruptly, cutting off whatever Seungmin had been going on about - most likely something about how good Yuri looked today or–

You lurched yourself away from the table and barreled towards the nearest bathroom. Stumbling into a stall and falling to the floor you pulled the door closed roughly behind you before coughing into the toilet. Blue petals trickled from your lips until you were coughing up stems and clumps of matted blue and red.

After your lungs clear a little and the petals were fewer and smaller you sat back and rested your head against the door. Taking a shuddering breath you looked at the mess of blood and petals and winced.

Rising to your feet, you stumbled to the sink and splashed cold water on your face before looking up at your reflection. You were white as a sheet and tired bloodshot eyes stared back at you, your hairline damp with sweat.

You spun around, not wanting to look at the gaunt reflection - only to come face to face with Kim Seungmin. His face was contorted in horror and fear as he took in the blood and petals on your clothes.

Shit.

this is a reworked chapter from my markhyuck fic, ao3, but I thought it fit seungmin with a few changes so uuuh... hopefully I’ll be writing more soon? if anyone has any oneshot ideas i’d love to hear them!

[suengmi]

- the ways stray kids show their love and affection

genre: fluff/romance, nonidol!au, gn!reader warnings: mentions of making out, nakedness? idk lol

anyways this is just major soft hours, one of my moots said i should do this i can't remember who it was pls lmk if it was you asljdls also unedited

♡ masterlist / pls reblog if you liked! it helps a lot ♡

⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆ bang chan

sweet kisses all over your face to wake you up, pressing his nose into the crook of your neck and gently nibbling you. “i’m bored wake up babe.” grunts when you ignore him. ends up pulling the sheets back so your naked body is exposed to the cold. “that’s what you get.” gets salty but then feels bad, covering you up again, then he really wakes you up. back hugs when you’re cooking for him. whining whenever you don’t pay attention to him, tugging at the edge of your shirt. sulks when you say you’re busy. doesn’t give a fuck about how clingy he is, but he knows you love it. holds your hand a little too hard when you’re walking together. kiss attacks always!!

⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆ lee know

stops you from crossing the street until he’s checked it. “stupid, look next time.” beats you twice in a board game but sees that you're sad that you’re not that good at it, but fails the third time just to see you smile and gloat about beating him. he loves seeing you happy, even if he has to purposely fail. leaves you notes everywhere, maybe just ‘i love yous’ mixed in with ‘i know you’ll forget this so don’t.’ text messages asking if you’ve eaten, and then getting mad and sending food to your door if you haven’t. swiftly kisses to the forehead aggressively saying you ‘deserve it’ but sounds like a threat. ‘you know i love you yeah?’ more aggressive kisses. ‘i won’t stop until you say you love me!!’

⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆ changbin

little wrestling matches on the couch, telling you that you’re silly for even trying. pulls you by the back of your hair if you’re not paying attention to him. “i left you the last piece of food.” always, always saves you the last piece no matter what it is. picks you up and throws you around, pretending he’s going to eat you bc apparently he’s a monster. but says you taste good so he doesn’t mind eating you. more wrestles. whenever you’re sad, he always cheers you up and never fails to make you laugh. does his trot impression of some old korean songs, full performance with your glitter jacket on that doesn’t fit him. ‘you still love me now? you better.’ knows you love being engulfed by him, so 90% of the time he is the big spoon. when he's feeling really romantic, he'll do a little picnic at the beach. always making sure it was at sunset because he knew it was your favourite time of the day.

⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆ jisung

midnight trips to get take out, sitting in the car until 2am with both of your feet on the dashboard. ‘remember that time!’ always reminiscing about how you first met, nearly choking on your fries when you recall. kisses in the car, kisses in the house, kisses in the shower, kisses in the dark. ‘babe but i want it.’ chucks a tanty when you don’t buy him things. pouts and folds his arms. ‘if you loved me you would!’ holds the cuff of your jumper, mostly walking behind you whenever you go somewhere because he feels safe. morning calls, but especially night calls. he doesn’t care how you look at the end of the day, he just wants to see you and tell you he loves you. hiding himself in your jumper and saying there is enough room for two (when there isn't.)

⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆ hyunjin

taking you to art galleries, standing behind you with his head resting on yours. ends up putting his hands into your pockets from behind, cutely leading you around from the back. with hyunjin it’s not always words, sometimes it’s just his actions. he pushes your hair out of your face or tucks it behind your hair. mostly, he does your hair for you. always making sure your hair was out of your face because it annoyed you. brings you tea and sits with you if you’re studying or drawing or even watching tv, rubs your thigh gently to let you know that he doesn’t want to distract you, just shows you he wants to be with you. rubs your belly if you feel bloated and talks to it. 'you better stop being bloated or... i'll do something. idk what.' art dates!! always drawing together, even if you're shit he encourages you to keep going

⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆ seungmin

gently slips his fingers into yours without saying anything but smiling to himself when he sees you blush, he kind of loves that he makes you nervous. always taking the chance to make your cheeks tint pink. showers with seungmin, always washing your body and shampooing your hair for you, wet kisses in between. sometimes he’d gently press his nose on your naked skin, enjoying your scent but never admitting it. ‘it’s comforting’ he’d say in defence, ignoring you for the rest of the night. guiding you with his hand on your lower back, making sure you were safe no matter where you were. kisses to the forehead, the back of the hand, the back of your knees. seungmin doesn’t say it much, but he does love you. he shows it through everything else, knowing those words have such a weight to them.

⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆ felix

‘are you gonna cook!?’ jumping up and down when you say yes, annoying you the whole time you’re cooking or baking. ‘is it done? i can’t wait to eat it!!’ eats half of the food before it’s even cooked because he says it’s ‘too good.’ little play fights that would begin from felix nibbling at your fingers and then at your thighs. ‘little gremlin’ you’d end up joking, rolling around on the floor, bodies all over each other, which would end in a heated make out session and clothes far gone. he’d send you random texts, of random things. ‘hey i saw this flower, it's cute, yeah?’ ‘this potato looks like you. it’s too cute to eat T-T’ ‘you think i could eat 11 hot dogs in two minutes? hmm maybe.’ 

⋆｡˚☽˚｡⋆ jeongin

blowing raspberries on your tummy and holding you down. sometimes uses your foot as a telephone. ‘yes hello stinky foot line how can i stink you today?’ proceeds to try and hold your foot with his. 'shut up i can do it!!' probably be super sarcastic, mocking you when you tried to be cute with whatever you were saying. karaoke together, always singing out of pitch but though he’s laughing, encourages you to be more confident because he loves seeing you enjoy yourself. watches you sometimes, just admiring you but instantly whips his head around to pretend he wasn’t, head banging into something hanging from the wall. ‘mind your business’ he’d joke, walking away suspiciously.

♡ taglist: @blankdyean @l3visbby @daddyjoonchua @ipegchangbin @abcdefgiwsmcty ♡

[wooahaes]

skz - first ever kiss

pairing: skz x gn!reader

prompt: skz reacting to reader who’s never been kissed & kissing them for the first time

warnings: intentional lowercase + no proofreading. skinship in general + first time kisses!! also mention of a college au in i.n’s <3

daisy’s notes: gamers i have been hit hard w the writers block recently........ pain. take some kisses lol

bang chan

despite the fact you had blurted out the fact you’d never been kissed to chris right as he was about to kiss you the first time, you think things went pretty well. chris had backed off with a “do you want to wait?” and happily agreed when you told him you did (not because you didn’t want to kiss him, because you did, but it was a little too much too soon).

except now, a few weeks later, he was staring at you from across the dinner table in your apartment. you’d invited him over, joking that you were going to seduce him with your cooking just to hear his cute laugh. things had been going well: dinner turned out great, the two of you had been talking about your days until chris just... started staring at you with that same fond look he always had for you.

yet it felt different.

“you’ve really never been kissed?” he finally asked at a lull in the conversation.

you shrugged. “never.” you shrank into yourself. “is that weird?”

he immediately shook his head, “no! no, it’s--it’s completely normal. i just think... you’re really cute. i just kind of want to kiss you.”

with a shy smile, you toyed with the edge of your sleeve as you decided to tease him with a “oh, do you?”

“may i?”

your eyes flickered up to meet his, and then you nodded. “you may.”

chris leaned in, lips pressing against yours for a chaste kiss. it was short, yet sweet, and he pulled away all too soon. “was that good?”

you nodded. “i think so.”

“you think so?” he teased lightly, smiling. “if you want another, then you should say that,” he reached up, playing with your hands as he giggled, “you’re so cute...”

and maybe you would take him up on the offer, already leaning in for a second kiss if it meant you’d see your boyfriend turn red with realization.

lee minho

you’d told minho on your third date that you had never been kissed before. he had looked up at you over dinner, quiet for a moment before nodding.

“do you want it to be special?” he asked, carefully watching you. “we can make it special.”

you instead asked for him to take things slow, and he’d agreed easily enough. minho seemed happy enough to just hold your hands, interlocking his fingers with your own when the two of you walked side by side. he showed his budding love for you in different ways--in pictures of his cats when you were stressed or tired (typically alongside his own face, but you had the sneaking suspicion that minho was trying to show off his cute cats too), in quiet dates where he’d kiss the back of your locked hands before pointing out something he thought you’d like, in the smiles he’d give you before asking if he could kiss you on the cheek. you liked the way he’d always ask before brushing his lips against your cheek, always lingering a second longer before pulling away. you liked those smiles, too: they were reserved for you.

that had been a little over a month before you felt ready, and maybe minho’s push for you to be comfortable meant more than he’d realize. he’d walked you home, holding your hand the entire way while the two of you idly chatted about whatever came to mind.

you called his name when the two of you finally made it all the way to your apartment’s door (at his insistence--he knew you could go up by yourself, but you suspected it was his way of getting extra time with you). “can we kiss?”

his eyes lit up as he turned away, hiding a smile. a flustered minho was always one of your favorite sights because of how cute he could be. he told you once that he didn’t talk about you often to all of his friends because some of them would point out how enamored with you he looked. his eyes met yours a moment later, “are you sure?”

you nodded. “unless you don’t want to.”

“i do,” he said. and then he leaned in, lips pressing against your own gently. he drew back slowly, giving you a small smile before shying away. “it’s just a first,” he told you, visibly flustered, “we’ll have better kisses.”

you’d hold him to that.

seo changbin

changbin had been the one to bring it up: you’d dodged his attempt to kiss you twice before he realized that something was up. he’d been calm, although you could tell that he seemed a little upset--he thought you hadn’t wanted to kiss him. the moment you told him that you were nervous, you could see the relief in his eyes.

“i’ve never been kissed before,” you told him a moment later, just to clarify it further. “so i guess i’m worried i’ll be bad at it.”

“then you can kiss me,” he said. “that way you don’t have to worry.” he curled his fingers around your hand, “whenever you’re ready, you can kiss me.”

you had pecked him on the cheek for that, saying that your binnie was such a sweetheart--just to tease him. you liked the cute smile changbin would give you when you called him yours, always exclusive to you (and perhaps, in a sense, you could consider it yours in a way, too).

so when you were ready, you turned to changbin while the two of you had been walking in the park one night after dinner. “can i kiss you?”

his eyes lit up, and then you saw that cute smile again. the moment he said yes, you leaned in to gently kiss him. your nose bumped against his, but he smiled nonetheless and planted one quick peck against your lips after you pulled away.

“that was bad,” you said, getting embarrassed already.

“i liked it,” he said, already drawing you close, “it was with you.”

cheesy cute binnie was maybe one of your favorites. as much as you liked the rough exterior of changbin, it was cute to watch him melt for you in an instant.

hwang hyunjin

hyunjin had been painting when you approached him, a cup of coffee sitting on the table next to him while he worked. the two of you were still in the early stages of dating (he’d only asked to be your boyfriend a little under a month ago), and you knew he was getting mildly annoyed with the way you kept dodging his attempts to kiss you. you came up with excuses--the first few which he accepted as truth, but you knew hyunjin well enough. even though he had his dumb moments (as everyone did), hyunjin wasn’t an idiot. he just might have jumped to a conclusion that lead to a slight argument between the two of you.

“i’ve never kissed anyone before,” you blurted out after sitting down, “and i really don’t want our first kiss to suck.”

he looked up, pulling out his other earbud as he studied your face. “oh.”

he’d confronted you the night before over the phone and asked if you were actually into him. you swore you were, and when he pushed, you argued that he could wait for you to tell him face to face. the ‘now versus later’ argument was small, sure, but you felt awful after he finally agreed to meet you the next morning. 

“you should have told me,” he said, yet his voice stayed soft. “i would have understood.”

you toyed with your fingers idly, not quite meeting his gaze. “it’s embarrassing.”

“it’s not.” he reached across the table, slightly batting away one of your hands in favor of holding the other. he called your name, waiting for you to look up. “what do you want me to do?”

you blinked at him, unsure of what he meant.

“do you want it to be special? or do you want to wait?”

“special how?”

hyunjin arranged a date for the two of you with the promise that you’d only kiss him if you wanted to. otherwise, it was just another romantic outing. dinner together, a walk through an art museum, and then he took you star-gazing in the park. hyunjin could be romantic, but he definitely turned it up just to try and make it memorable for you.

and when you kissed him at the end of the date, content with how he went out of his way to make this memorable for you, you swore you saw more stars in his eyes than in the sky. if a starry-eyed hyunjin was going to greet you every time you kissed him, you’d definitely have to surprise him with little kisses from now on.

han jisung

jisung had... panicked a little when you finally told him, although he was hit with the relief that you did want to kiss him. you’d dodged his last two moments without saying much (and when you’d apologized, saying you weren’t sure how to tell him you’d never been kissed, he’d stopped you before you could apologize too much). he’d taken your hands, thumbs soothingly running over your knuckles, and asked what you wanted.

“i want both of us to be ready for it,” you had said without much thought to it. and that was when jisung realized that, as much as he’d been wanting to kiss you, it felt a little... forced to kiss you so soon. his friends had lightly teased him about not kissing you sooner, and maybe he’d gotten a little too in his head thinking that he was keeping you waiting.

waiting he could do. with the air clear, jisung felt safer just being himself with you: no pressure to be more than a guy who was falling for you more every day. between lunch dates and walks together and all the sappy things that couples do, jisung liked holding your hand and admiring you against the backdrop of the world.

maybe that was why the two of you felt ready during a movie night. just the two of you in his apartment, his roommate out for a little longer. no one to ruin the moment (but himself, he thought, and tried to push that thought away again), and no one to make him feel like he needed to make this perfect. you’d told him you didn’t want perfect once: you wanted him, flaws and all, and it’d been so saccharine that jisung swore you had his heart then and there.

“can i...?” he’d asked, leaning in.

your forehead had bumped against his own for a moment, and he heard the soft way you laughed before angling your face and closing the distance between the two of you. he would commit the way your lips had curved into a smile to his memory, smiling back as he kissed you gently. 

and maybe it wasn’t the perfect first kiss he’d drafted in his mind on late nights where the thought kept him awake... but the moment belonged to both of you now.

lee felix

felix had been listening to you talk for the past several minutes until you finally dropped a bomb on him casually mid-walk through the park: “and, you know, since i’ve never been kissed, it kind of hurt when she said it’s weird to not have it in your teens--”

he’d perked up. “you’ve never been kissed?”

you had blinked, realizing you’d never mentioned it before. “no?”

“oh.”

“is... that a bad thing?” you watched him for a moment. “i thought i told you.”

“you didn’t,” he said, and then realized how awkward he must have become. “it’s not a big deal--i just... thought someone would have kissed you before.”

“uh-huh,” you rolled your eyes. “sure.”

“i mean... i want to kiss you,” felix said, “i can’t imagine people not wanting to kiss you. not that they haven’t. i mean--you’re... very kissable.”

the way you snorted in response made him crack a smile, thankful that he hadn’t offended you. truly, felix was sure he was living in his own world where everyone else had to see how special you were. it couldn’t just be him, he refused to accept that.

“i just never found someone i really wanted to kiss before,” you’d said with a shrug. “you’re the first, i guess.” 

oh. oh. he felt his face growing warmer at the thought. “so... you want to kiss me?”

“that’s what i said,” you teased. “you don’t have to kiss me now if you don’t want to, felix, but i’d be happy kissing you--”

and so felix leaned in, lips brushing against your own for a quick moment. the action had made you stop completely in your tracks, train of thought thrown from its own path, and stare at him with your mouth agape and eyes wide. he’d merely smiled back at you, face growing even warmer.

“god, you’re cute,” you’d finally said a moment later, laughing lightly.

“so that’s good?”

“it was with you, silly,” your fingers had intertwined with his own, “of course i liked it.”

kim seungmin

“you’ve never been kissed before?”

seungmin had watched you sitting across the dinner table from him, suddenly more shy than you’d ever been. you nodded after a moment, thankful that he hadn’t said it too loud--other people were sometimes... judge-y about that kind of thing. some people made comments that everyone has their first kiss in their teens, and then backtracked immediately when you confessed that you hadn’t. you and seungmin had merely been talking about high school and he’d offhandedly mentioned his first kiss. so you decided to go ahead and tell him.

“that’s... normal,” he had said after a moment, carefully calculated. “i mean, lots of people don’t have their first kiss until later.” 

(of course, seungmin had noticed the way you backed away from kisses before--dating you for a few weeks had lead to a few attempts before he settled on pecking your cheek instead since you were far more comfortable with that.)

“do you want to kiss me?”

you’d felt your face burn at the outright question, only to notice the smile seungmin was giving you--he was teasing you a little. just enough to make you flustered. “yes.”

and you watched the way he was taken aback by the outright answer, before smiling. “good,” he had said. “i want to kiss you, too.”

seungmin leaned in, hesitating for just a second (an out, you realized) before gently pecking you on the lips for barely any time at all. he leaned back, lips still oh so close to your own as his eyes flickered up to meet you own. something about the look in his eyes made your mouth feel dry.

you found your voice a moment later, “that doesn’t count.”

“then stop looking at me like that,” he whined. “close your eyes.”

was he blushing? you swore he was. you smiled, but shut your eyes a moment later. seungmin kissed you gently before pulling away. when you opened your eyes again, you could see how flustered he’d become.

“what?”

his gaze met yours a moment later for barely a second before he looked away again. he was quiet as he begrudgingly mumbled a “you’re cute.”

you cracked a smile. “oh?”

“you’re cute,” he said, louder that time. “okay? i think you’re cute.”

(he’d done the same thing when you asked him out, too--mumbling that he was free before getting all flustered when you asked him to repeat himself. as in love with you as he was falling, admitting it was its own task.)

“well, good,” you hummed before leaning in to press a tiny kiss against the corner of his lips, “i think you’re cute, too.”

yang jeongin

jeongin had been playing with your fingers when you finally told him, gaze flickering back up to your face. you’d let him have your spare hand while writing out part of your homework for a class, and this was how jeongin entertained himself until he could have your full attention again (or how he tempted you to pay more attention to him--the pains of having an impossibly cute boyfriend). you’d backed out of his attempt to kiss you the night before, and you didn’t want to let the situation sit for too long--so with jeongin coming over to hang out with you... the timing felt right to tell him.

“really?” he asked, as casual as could be. “do you want to kiss me?”

you looked up from your work long enough to see that he was definitely teasing you. “i dunno,” you hummed, “i think my boyfriend is incredibly kissable.”

“oh? really? then i’ll fight him for you,” he giggled, bringing your knuckles against his lips. “i think he wants to kiss you, too.”

you almost rolled your eyes as you went back to your work, jeongin playing with the beaded friendship bracelet around your wrist. “i’d hope so.”

“do you think about it?”

jeongin always knew how to make you look back at him. “hm?”

“kissing me.” he smiled.

you knew that he wasn’t going to let you work in peace now. you closed your notebook after a moment, turning to him. you’d work later when you went home. all you had wanted was a head start on it, and that was what you got. “sometimes.”

“do you want me to kiss you?” he sat up straight, watching you carefully. “right now?”

was your roommate home? you wracked your brain for a moment, trying to remember their schedule. it’d feel weird if they walked in on you and jeongin kissing--especially for your first. you leaned back, glancing to where their things usually stayed and took note that their shoes and bag were both gone. they had said something about a study date, now that you thought about it.

“well?” jeongin said with a teasing lilt to his voice. “i wanna kiss you. but i’ll only do it when you want to,” he reached for your hand again. “if you wanna wait, i’m okay with that. just tell me what you want.”

“kiss me.”

his eyes lit up at the command, and he leaned in to kiss you gently. his fingers grazed the side of your face, hand still held by his other hand. his nose bumped against your own (and you could hear him giggle as he pulled away, just long enough to mumble an apology against you lips) before he corrected himself.

jeongin pulled away, thumb tracing along the apple of your cheek. “was that good?”

you nodded shyly, and he giggled at that.

“good,” he said. “otherwise i’d have to kiss you again to make up for it.”

(and maybe, after a little teasing from you that you’d changed your mind, he gladly would.)

taglist: @twancingyunhao​

[soobnny]

eighteen — kim seungmin.

trope. best friends to lovers. college au. slow burn. angst. fluff.

synopsis. it takes you a while to realize being known is being loved, and kim seungmin just so happens to be an expert in the study of you.

word count: 19.8k words

warnings. just extreme slow burn. some curse words. sexual jokes. drinking and being intoxicated. 

note. again my self indulgent take on seungmin in college :)

one.

Kim Seungmin has a habit of blowing up your phone every chance he gets. So, it really isn’t anything new to wake up to a million notifications from your best friend.

The range of apps from which he bothers you is astronomical.

(Instagram): _seungmin mentioned you in a comment: @ynbread lmao this video reminded me of u cos ure an idiot

(Tiktok): seungmin mentioned you in a comment: @ynbread us

(Twitter): seungmin replied to your tweet: I’m hungry can u reply to my messages

But nothing, absolutely nothing, can beat the 56 messages and 9 missed calls on your phone. You’d think it was an emergency if not for his last message, shining brightly through your screen.

minnie: i need a new face wash come with me so i can shut up about it 😡

You roll your eyes to yourself, skimming through the notifications on your lock screen without really opening them. It’s mostly just a series of Seungmin asking you if you were awake every hour with a few whining in between about how he’s bored and how you need to wake up. 

While you’re laughing at his overdramatic messages (has he been hanging out with Hyunjin too much these days?), you accidentally unleash a storm upon yourself.

You hadn’t meant to click on one of the notifications, and now a taunting “read” is on the bottom of his messages.

Big mistake.

All hell is about to break lose.

The moment Kim Seungmin receives the small indication that you’re finally awake, his face flashes on your screen almost immediately in a Facetime call. It’s tempting to decline his call in favor of burying your face back into your pillows, but the clock reads 11am and you have an annoying best friend that needs your attention. You know never to ignore Seungmin. You’ve learned that the hard way.

Swiping on accept, his head of fluffy hair pops up on your screen. “Finally! What took you so long?” His phone angle shifts so his face shows now – it seems like he’s outside as he’s looking left and right before crossing somewhere. 

“Sleeping.” You rub your eyes, propping your phone against a box of tissues so he can see you while you fix your bed. 

“Didn’t wanna wake up cause you were dreaming of me?” You can hear the laughter in his voice.

Appropriately, you respond by gifting him your middle finger. “You wish.”

“Did you sleep well?” You hum in response even though you doubt he could hear you amidst the noise outside and the shuffling of your bedsheets. “What did you need?” You grab your phone from your nightstand, walking towards your refrigerator to get a glass of water. 

“Face wash. You’re coming with me. Oh, and bring an umbrella, it’s drizzling a little.”

“Gonna have to raincheck.”

Second big mistake.

“Why?” He drawls his question, whining and pushing his phone deeper towards his face so you can see his visible disapproval at your response.

“Seungmin, I just woke up. It’s gonna take me forever to get ready, and you’re already outside.” 

There’s a lack of response from his end after a few seconds. When you look back at your phone screen, he seems preoccupied. “Minnie?” 

“Wait, wait. I have to hang up, give me a second.”

You tilt your head in confusion, but you don’t say anything else. This was a rare moment when you got to escape from Seungmin’s evil clutches of always dragging you along when he goes out. Looking through your closet for a change of clothes after you shower, you jump at the sudden and very rushed pounding on your door.

You should’ve known better.

Opening the door, a breathless Seungmin slips past the space before pushing your door closed. “Why was Crazy Karen on shift today?” He falls face first on your couch, still heaving after the cardio he’d done to sprint towards your unit. 

Seungmin’s been quite the expert at sneaking into your very ‘strict with visitors’ building. Not only has he befriended Derek (the security guard on duty when it wasn’t Karen), he’s gone through every possible entrance and has mastered the way to your door. He’s been doing it for the past three years, to the point you’re convinced he could navigate his way around blindfolded. 

Funnily enough, he was basically a criminal in your building. Karen (Crazy Karen, as Seungmin likes to call her) has been trying to catch him for forever. You’re convinced that one more push from Seungmin and she’d be printing flyers with his face on it with a clear “BANNED” message in red bold font and taping it on the walls of your building. 

Seungmin’s been able to escape her for months now. Though, despite being an expert vigilante, he still has his lapses. And today, he hadn’t been aware that Karen was on duty. “(Name), she hates me!” 

“She hates everyone.” You deadpan. Seungmin’s always found it disturbing that Karen didn’t like him. He was an angel in everyone’s eyes – your parents, Derek the security guard, your professors, your friends. If only they knew better. 

With the thousands of people that adore him, Seungmin doesn’t know why Karen was such a tough egg to crack. Maybe she knew better, that your best friend is the devil incarnate, but the devil incarnate that you adore. 

“How’d you get here so quickly? Wait… were you already on your way here before I picked up your call?” You ask pointedly, leaning against the wall and furrowing your eyebrows at Seungmin who still hasn’t left your couch, instead making himself comfortable by draping his legs across the armrest and hugging your throw pillow to his chest.

“Yes, cause you were ignoring me!” The pout on his face is so exaggerated, you would’ve smacked it off if you didn’t have the biggest crush on him.

“I wasn’t ignoring you. I was sleeping!”

“Tomato, tomato. Same thing.” 

You concede the argument with a sigh because God forbid he lost an argument to you. “Anyways, (name).” He’s whining again, staring at you while you skim through your clothes. “I’m so hungry, I could eat your couch.”

“You do you, I guess.” 

“Do you hate me?”

“Only sometimes.” 

This was the funny thing about your friendship with Seungmin. From an outsider’s perspective, they would’ve sworn you two disliked each other – from your pointed responses and backhanded comments towards one another. However, through the lens of your shared friends, they knew you completed each other. Nobody (aside from Minho, and occasionally Jeongin) could match your best friend’s personality quite well, and absolutely nobody could get him as soft as you could. It’s reserved for your eyes only.

Chan jokes around that Seungmin should never drive you away because he’s finally found someone who gets along with him terribly well aside from them. He agrees, but he would never outwardly admit it out loud to his friends or to you. But deep down, he knows that you two understand every inch of each other like you’re a reflection of one another.

With that said, he wouldn’t want to spend his time buying face wash with anyone else. 

When he suddenly gets off the couch, you look at him suspiciously. He’s walking in your direction now, beaming with his eyes squinting and lips curving up and hair falling perfectly on his forehead – he looks so cute that your heart starts feeling something you can’t quite identify. “(Name).” 

“Seungmin.” He grabs your hands without warning and your heart catapults out of your chest.  

“Come with me to buy face wash and we can eat lunch together. Please please, cause I’m your best friend and you can’t say no to me.” Seungmin defends his case like a lawyer desperate to win. 

He leans in impossibly closer to your face as a vindictive tactic to get you to say yes, and you’re embarrassed to admit it’s working. You tell yourself you’re only agreeing so he would stop fiddling with your fingers with his perfectly crafted hands and looking at you with his stupid, pretty eyes. 

“Fine, now let go of me so I can get a change of clothes. Besides, aren’t you like the number one Touch Hater anyway?”

Seungmin smiles triumphantly to himself, slipping his hands from yours. “How narcissistic of you to think you’re the only one I enjoy holding. I like Kkami too! And Soonie, and Doongie–”

“Why am I being classified with your friends’ pets?” 

Kim Seungmin doesn’t admit that you’re the only person he likes to hold. Instead, he shrugs and pushes you towards your bathroom so you could hurry up and he can finally buy his face wash. 

two.

The next time Kim Seungmin blows up your notifications is after you’ve just finished your last class of the week.

He’s already waiting for you outside your building, leaning against a lamp post and scrolling through dog videos on Tiktok with a few quokka appearances.

The algorithm confuses Seungmin in that it’s so fast to pick up the videos you’ve liked – even if it was just one. He’s pretty sure he’s only getting these rather abundant quokka videos because Jisung had borrowed his phone once and probably liked a Tiktok. Now it’s everywhere to the point that Seungmin could probably tell you at least 5 facts about them.  

He’s been standing there for a good 10 minutes now. He has given up on texting you to ask when your classes end (he reasons your professor must have overtime again), instead just adding a shit ton of videos to his “dog” collection on Tiktok.

When you exit the building with some of your blockmates, you feel your heartbeat pick up its pace at the sight of Seungmin in his oversized gray Dodgers hoodie (one of your personal favorites to steal) and some light washed pants with his cute smile and messy hair.

He looks a little embarrassed, as if he wants the earth to swallow him up right then and there. You suppose it’s because he’s been standing there awkwardly, having to look at people in the passing while waiting for you.

Once you appear though, the embarrassment fizzles away and Seungmin is making his way towards you with his hands buried deep in the pockets of his hoodie.

“One more overtime and I’m gonna have to report that professor.”

“You’re just saying that cause you’re impatient and you hate having to wait for five minutes.”

“10 minutes. I waited ten minutes today.” You laugh at the boy, attention wavering when your friends bid their goodbyes to you and Seungmin. You wave politely, and Seungmin mimics you, smiling sheepishly and waving back.

You know they’re tripping over themselves after Seungmin smiles and waves back at them. You’ve been told multiple times by your blockmates that your best friend looks like a walking dream – the campus crush from the International Law and Legal Studies building.

You don’t disagree, it’s not exactly like you were blind. Every time you’d walk with Seungmin anywhere, he was bound to get some attention from the people around you.

There are multiple admirers lining up for your best friend, shaking as they make their way up to him just to say ‘hi’ or purposely standing near him during college events. It also doesn’t help that his whole friend group were the campus crush from their respective majors.

Too bad for your blockmates and the multiple people lining up willing to donate their kidneys though. Seungmin doesn’t care much about anything and anyone outside his carefully selected circle.

He’s polite, smiling back and waving and holding small conversations but there’s always a hint of disinterest when they’d try to keep the conversation longer than he’d like. He isn’t stupid and knows there’s always an ulterior motive to get with him. He knows how easy it is to mistake politeness for interest.

“Come on, I want coffee.” How demonic is it to have a friend who’s convinced he’s Bill Gates’ son with the amount of times he’s asked you to eat out.

Seungmin pushes you forward by placing a hand on the small of your back, his other hand clutching his messenger bag, guiding you to walk ahead along the sidewalks of your university.

He makes sure you’re on the safer side of the road, bumping you to move to the side.

You stop in your tracks, shaking your head at the boy and he looks at you with utter confusion. “I’m not coming with you to buy overpriced coffee. I’ve used up all my allowance for the week.”

“Waited for you for ten minutes just to be rejected. Ouch.”

“Sucks to be you.”

You’re about to say your goodbye to your best friend, heels shifting to walk the other way when his hand easily wraps around your wrist, pulling you back to where he’s stood. You slap his hand away, pointing an accusatory finger at his direction. “You are not gonna convince me. Not again.”

Screw him and his large hands and how easy it is for him to maneuver them back around your wrist to keep you in place. “I’ll pay, just come with me.”

You surrender in an instant. Who were you to pass on free coffee?

Seungmin smiles victoriously when you start walking by his side again before his face falls in a pout, going off in a tangent about how you’re only willing to hangout with him if he’s paying and how he’s too young to be your sugar daddy.

You sigh in relief when you reach the campus coffee shop, the strong aroma of coffee immediately filling your senses as Seungmin breathes out in delight.

Going straight to the counter, he orders himself an Iced Americano before turning to look at you. “Just the usual?” You nod your head, moving away to find a seat for the both of you.

Every time you’re in a coffee shop (which is, a lot), you’re reminded of the first time you met Seungmin.

He was working part time at a coffee shop, trying to save some money for college and you were merely a customer. He had accidentally knocked the - thankfully, cold - coffee all over you. In compensation, he begs for your order again so he could make it for free.

He still knows your coffee order by heart up until today.

Taking both of your orders, Seungmin moves to settle back to wherever you’re seated when he spots Jisung and Changbin sitting at your table as well.

He should’ve known they’d be here today – they practically lived on coffee. Seungmin supposes this is what double majoring in Music Management and with Music Theory and Composition looks like.

“Not you two again.” Seungmin fakes exasperation, standing by Jisung who’s seated next to you before shooing him away, claiming that Jisung was in his spot. Jisung simply smirks knowingly before shuffling towards the seat next to Changbin.

“So, I have a funny story.” When Changbin speaks up, Jisung is quick to clasp a hand over his mouth.

“We don’t have a funny story.” He counters Changbin’s claim pointedly, shaking his head and glaring at his best friend.

But who could open up a topic and not proceed around Seungmin? He’ll pull up every piece of blackmail he has on his phone, appropriately labeled “to use against friends” and start threatening you. Absolutely no one can escape Seungmin, and that’s how you find Changbin telling the story of how someone had kissed Jisung and when she pulled away, all he did was say “thank you”.

“Who says that after kissing someone?” Your laughter triggers a smile on Seungmin’s face, too busy observing you to make fun of Jisung. He’ll save that for later when you walk home together. For now, the sight of you laughing is too enchanting to look away from.

Jisung, on the other hand, ignores your question. He’s already embarrassed enough.

“I don’t know! I was nervous! My brain doesn’t work sometimes, you know?” Jisung’s running his hand through his hair in frustration, desperately trying to defend himself, hands moving inanimately while speaking.

“Your brain doesn’t work all the time.” Seungmin retorts and the boy pouts at his younger friend.

“Can we talk about something else?”

You, in fact, do not talk about anything else much to Jisung’s dismay. On your way back home, Changbin brings it up again after jokingly kissing Jisung’s cheek and saying “thank you” right after.  

A heavy arm swings around your shoulder, Seungmin pulling you towards him as he lets his other friends be with their teasing. You look up at your best friend, shifting your attention back to the ground when you meet his gaze.

You’re walking slightly ahead of the two boys, and Seungmin’s just asking you how your day was. He always does this. Every time he walks you back to your building, he’d always ask how your day went.

This might have stemmed from your first and only huge argument – when you kept your feelings to yourself because you didn’t want to be a bother to him. Seungmin’s made sure to create a comfortable space for you to vent to him ever since.

When you talk, Seungmin listens attentively. You don’t know if you love or hate it. It’s a little difficult to recount what happened in your day when he’s looking at you like that. Seungmin may tease you a lot, but you know he cares a lot and one of his ways of showing that is by listening to you.

Your quiet conversation is cut short when the two boys catch up with you, Jisung’s eyes narrow at Seungmin while he walks backward so he’s in front of Seungmin. “How come you like touching (name) and not us?”

“Don’t say it like that, you sound like a perv.” Changbin smacks the back of his head and Jisung giggles when his choice of words dawn on him.

“Sorry. I mean, how come you’re not disgusted to initiate physical contact with her! What about me?”

(Because I like her, Seungmin thinks but doesn’t actually say).

Instead, Seungmin smirks, keeping his arm around you before teasing his older friend. “Aw, is our Jisung getting jealous? Don’t worry, I’ll hold your hand once we drop (name) off.”

“Actually?” Jisung beams at what Seungmin says and he halts his steps, instead walking forward with his hand outstretched towards where Seungmin’s standing.

“No, fuck off! I was kidding!” You laugh when Seungmin detaches himself from you so he can properly run away from Jisung who’s desperate to hold the young boy’s hand.

It’s in moments like these, when the feeling of his arm around your shoulder still lingers, and Jisung’s words echo in your head (why does he only hold you?), and Changbin’s nudging your side knowingly, that makes you think.

Could you possibly mean something more to Seungmin? The way that he means to you?

three.

Apart from your notifications, Kim Seungmin has a habit of blowing up your ears. 

You hear him before you see him. Winter seems startled at the sudden screech of your name from the other side of the street, laughing quietly to herself when she spots Seungmin running at you in full speed. She pays no mind when Seungmin latches himself around you, waving at her after finding a comfortable spot to rest his chin (on top of your head). 

“That felt like it came out of a movie.”

You’re still waiting for your food with Winter by the food truck. Seungmin doesn’t seem to mind the wait. Despite learning over the years that he was impatient and usually annoyed at anyone and everything that made him wait, he’s also come to realize that he doesn’t mind the wait when it comes to you. Why else would he wait for you despite your professor being well known for always going past his allotted time? 

He couldn’t do that for anyone else. 

“What are your plans after here?” Seungmin directs the question towards the both of you, slowly unhooking himself from around you to look at the menu of the food truck. 

“Might go to the mall and buy some airpods.” Winter mumbles, pulling her bucket hat down in embarrassment as Seungmin stares at her in disbelief. “Wow. You said that as if you’re just buying a pencil or something.”

“No! What happened is that… I thought I left my airpods in my mom’s car. But look at this.” She pulls out her phone, showing the notification that said ‘French fries (the name of her airpods) is far from the user’. “So I think I must’ve left it on the plane when I was coming back here from the academic break.” 

Winter’s pouting now at the thought of her upcoming big purchase. “I can’t survive without them. How am I supposed to tune everyone out?” 

“Order for Winter.” The conversation is cut abruptly by the man at the food truck with your orders. You break out in a smile at the sight of the food, taking it from Winter and whispering a quick ‘thank you’. 

“Spending money is so easy, but saving feels like a war.” Winter adds before she smells her food, mirroring the smile on your face and taking a bite out of the hard-shell taco she ordered. Seungmin looks around for a place to sit, spotting a bench not too far. “Come on, you girls need to sit.”

Ever the gentleman, Seungmin carries your drinks for you while you eat your food and walk to the bench he had spotted. Taking your seats, Winter pats your thigh and nods her head. “You got yourself a good one. I approve.” 

You’re confused for a moment before you feel the heat creep up from your neck to your entire face. Thank God Seungmin didn’t hear Winter implying that she approved of him as your boyfriend. If he did, he pretended not to hear.

However, he isn’t blind and can see your impossibly red face in abruptness.

“Woah, do you need something to drink?” He grabs his water bottle from his bag, unscrewing the cap and nudging it to your general direction. You gratefully take it from him, chugging down his water to try and cool yourself down. Winter all but giggles, pretending she didn’t almost trigger you to choke down on your food. 

The next few minutes are spent in silence with you and Winter savoring your food and Seungmin scrolling through his phone to check if he had any deadlines he missed. One of his hands rests naturally on your thigh, as if it was the most normal thing. 

When Winter finishes her food, she abruptly gets up from her seat, facing the both of you. “I’m gonna get going now so I can buy the airpods and wallow in my dorm until I fall asleep.” Your face scrunches up in amusement, nodding your head and getting up from your seat to give her a quick hug. “Take care! Text me when you get home.”

“I hope you get me for Secret Santa this year!” Seungmin earns a soft punch from Winter at his side comment before she’s off to the mall. Seungmin’s quick to pull you back down on the bench when Winter leaves, scooting so there’s almost no space between the two of you. 

“Do you have plans after here?” You hum, trying to think if you needed to be somewhere. Chewing down on your bottom lip, you shake your head. “I don’t think so.” 

“Good. You’re eating dinner with me. And don’t worry, I know what you’re thinking. We’re just going to the cafeteria on campus. I’m not gonna rob you off of your allowance.” You laugh in approval, taking another bite down your taco before tilting your body so you’re facing Seungmin, offering some up to your best friend.

“You want some?” You find he’s staring somewhere else instead of the food you had pushed up to his face. Trying to follow his gaze, you tilt your head with wide, doe-eyes before looking back to see if there was something behind you. “What are you looking at?”

Seungmin clears his throat, snapping out of his daydream. “Nowhere. Just…” You’ve never seen Seungmin this hesitant before. He’s pulling at the sleeves of the green sweater he’s wearing, looking around before he fixes his gaze on you again. 

Without warning, he sticks his thumb out to wipe something at the corner of your lips. 

“You had some sauce on your lips.” He’s looking straight ahead now, avoiding your eyes, as if he didn’t just leave you dumbfounded. “Close your mouth. You look like a fish.” Only then do you realize your lips have parted a little at his sudden actions. 

And then, just like Winter, he abruptly gets up. You don’t notice the redness at the tip of his ears when he leans down to pinch your cheeks. “Jeongin says he needs me. I’ll meet you for dinner, okay?” 

You don’t tell him you know that Jeongin’s still in class right now.

four.

When you arrive, Kim Seungmin is already there, waving you over to where he’s seated. 

It’s packed, as usual, filled with college kids that lived in the dorm areas around the campus. However, Seungmin still finds a seat for the both of you. 

Slipping past numerous sleep-deprived college kids, you make your way to your best friend. He greets you with a quick side hug before he’s pushing the best selling mango shake of your cafeteria in your direction. “Oh my god, they weren’t sold out?” 

Every student in your university knows that The Sunshine Harvest’s mango shake was the best drink ever made in mankind. It’s the stall with the longest line in your cafeteria which explains why it always sells out so fast. Everyone would rush to the cafeteria after their last class just to buy a cup – and it was budget friendly. You’ve long given up on buying one (after months) as your schedule never lined up to when there were still some left. You complained about it all the time to Seungmin.

“It wasn’t sold out when I got there. Probably is now.” He shrugs, trying to act nonchalant even though your smile is tipping him over the edge. 

All you did was smile, and Seungmin’s forgotten everything he’s supposed to say or do. It was definitely worth waiting in line for 30 minutes, he concludes.

Happily sipping on your shake, you ask Seungmin if you should start lining up at the food stalls to get dinner. He simply nods his head, telling you to go ahead so he could look after your seats while you search for what you want to eat. Seungmin takes the small time he has alone to calm down.

Then, he receives a phone call from you.

“Do you want pizza?”

“Pizza’s fine.”

“Okay, I’ll buy us pizza.”

“When you finish ordering, just come here and give me the receipt, okay? I’ll wait for it.”

“Minnie, you’re quite literally the most impatient man on this planet. I can do it.” 

“And you had a long day of classes today. Get your ass back here.” 

Within minutes, you’re back at your seat and Seungmin’s sitting you down, taking the receipt from your hands. “Good girl.” He ruffles your hair, dropping his hand right after to squish your pouting cheeks before he’s off to wait for your pizza. 

You drop your head on the table immediately after he leaves. Something in the way he said ‘good girl’ has your heart racing, and you can hear him tell you the table’s dirty but you cannot function at the moment so your face takes the consequence of Seungmin’s words. 

Moments later, Seungmin returns with your pizza, setting it down on the table before taking his seat across from you. There’s still steam blowing from the pizza from how recent it was baked, and you hear your stomach grumble at the sight. You start to fiddle with your fingers, contemplating whether you should wait for it to cool down or grab a slice right now. 

It looks so tempting to take a bite off.

“Don’t.” Before you can even proceed with your devious plan, you feel Seungmin flick your forehead as if he knows what you’re thinking. It’s because he does. Seungmin has memorized your body language. He knows you want to take a slice, and he also knows it’s still hot, and your tongue’s gonna burn, and you’re going to regret it. You slump back in your seat in defeat. 

Seungmin considers himself a genius when it comes to the study of you. While was a stellar student in his school subjects, nothing will come close to the extent of knowledge he has on you. He’s learned about you for years, to the point he thinks he might know you better than he knows himself. He can read you like an open book – his open book. He knows that when the tip of your ears turn red, it means you’re angry. He knows you fiddle with your fingers when you’re bored. He knows you’re one of the few people who puts milk before the cereal (he’s sworn to keep that secret safe with him). 

If Seungmin were to write his thesis paper about you, he was sure he’d get a perfect mark. He’s been unknowingly tucking little things he loved about you in his heart, which is why he waited those thirty damn minutes just to buy you that stupid mango shake that you loved so much. 

He’s looking at you now, staring intensely at the pizza as if it'll cool down faster if you sent it a threatening glare. He smiles to himself, where you can’t see, and he thinks – “Wow, I really really like her.” And for a moment, he thinks he’s brave enough to say it out loud, but seconds turn into minutes and the moment passes. Instead, he chooses to roll up the wrapper from your straw and flick it at you to get your attention and tell you it’s okay to eat your pizza now. 

And you smile, immediately going in to take a slice. You smile, and Seungmin thinks he never wants to go a day without seeing you smile. He forgives himself for not being able to tell you how he feels right now. He thinks he still has time. He still has so much time in the world to confess to you.

“It’s still hot. Careful, okay?” You take a bite and immediately wave a hand in front of your mouth from the heat. He laughs at your eagerness to finish the pizza despite its temperature and he reaches to grab his own slice. 

Seungmin wishes he can spend all his dinners like this.

It isn’t long before Seungmin’s walking you home. Despite living in the dorms within campus, he still pushes to walk you back to your building that’s a little outside of the campus. “I’ll walk you home. Come on.” 

On the way back, you spot the campus cats and dogs. You squeal at the sight of them, immediately crouching down and calling at them to come to where you and Seungmin are. The cats come mewling by your feet. Seungmin mirrors you and crouches down to pick one up in his arms, checking their collars and cooing audibly. “Hello, mushroom.” 

“Oh, she’s so cute.” You stand back up to pet the little kitten in Seungmin’s arms. She reminds you of one of Minho’s cats. Minho would love her. And then, you gasp. You spot the cutest golden retriever puppy, scratching at his collar. Seungmin puts the kitten down to follow you towards where the puppy’s sitting.

“Hello there…” You take a quick glimpse at his collar. “Fang. What a cute name.” You speak in a soft voice, lifting him up gently in your arms. Fang seems to immediately melt in your touch the moment you pick him up and give him some head rubs. 

Mushroom’s meowing in jealousy when Seungmin gives his attention elsewhere. 

“Want me to rub your back? Or give you some belly rubs?” You smile sweetly, moving your hard towards his back and moving your fingers along his fur. “Minnie. Do you ever think about how easy it is to steal them?” 

He laughs at your proposition, giving it a thought. “Maybe sometimes. I’m already a criminal in your building. Might as well be a criminal on campus too.” Seungmin joins you to rub behind Fang’s ears, a smile creeping up on his face.

“It’s getting late. We’re gonna have to go.” Seungmin says gently and you pout as you put the boy down. “I wish I could put you in my bag and take you home. You’re such a good boy.” You bid your goodbye to the puppy before letting him down. 

“That just made my entire day.” You say to no one in particular as you wave one last time to the cats and dogs who go back to playing amongst themselves.

On the rest of the way back, Seungmin complains about Minho and his Criminal Law professor, and you talk about the long list of long tests and quizzes you have lined up for next week. Conversation with Seungmin always comes so easy. And when he sees your building, he makes it a point to slow down his pace so you can finish your story about the time Ryujin put red dye in Chaeryeong’s shampoo bottle. And he listens. 

With you, it’s easy to forget time. 

You finish your story just in time. Seungmin won’t tell you he tried to time it perfectly so you wouldn’t be interrupted while you happily shared the story. 

“Goodnight idiot. Don’t pull another all nighter.” As usual, Seungmin’s fingers find their way to pinch your cheeks before pushing you towards the glass doors of your building. You laugh when you notice Seungmin’s eyes brighten at the sight of Derek, and he immediately sends a wave to his favorite security guard which Derek happily returns.

“Goodnight. Walk home safely!” 

On the way back to his dorms, Seungmin’s phone buzzes from the pocket of his jeans. It's a notification from Jeongin.

(Instagram): maknaeontop mentioned you in a comment: @_seungmin isnt this u with yn LOL

The post reads: “I’ll walk with you” is just an excuse to spend more time with someone before they go and that’s romantic as fuck.

Seungmin rolls his eyes and locks his phone before shoving it in the pockets of his jeans. How convenient is Jeongin’s timing to tag him in that post after he just walked you home.

five.

Kim Seungmin also enjoys complaining a lot. Despite being the one to offer his help, he’s holding up quite an attitude while he’s carrying your laundry to the laundry shop.

You were simply just texting each other, and you happened to tell him you were going to be doing your laundry today, and how you were dreading the long walk while carrying your shit ton of dirty clothes. That’s how you find Kim Seungmin waiting for you outside your building, taking his sweet time glaring at Karen. 

“Seungmin in the building!” His arms are open when he greets you and you fall into them in an instant. Seungmin rarely offers to hug you first so you take the moment to wrap your arms around him and stay in his embrace. Although, his enthusiasm doesn’t hold though when he’s carrying two bags of laundry on each of his shoulders and you’re walking to the laundry shop together. 

“You seriously didn’t have to do this.”

“You would’ve suffered from extreme shoulder and back pains, and I would’ve had to hear about it for the rest of the day. I’m doing myself a favor.” 

You roll your eyes and the conversation falls silent. A comfortable silence. 

You take the moment to look Seungmin over. He’s just wearing a white shirt and some sweatpants, and yet he looks like the most beautiful person on the planet. That’s Seungmin for you. He could wear anything and make it work. 

Fuck, he’s an alarm clock, and you’re so dazed by the way his hair looks like fluffy auburn under the sun, and how the outline of his chest is easy to see through his white shirt, and how his muscles are flexing from the weight of the bags he’s carrying. Since when did he start going to the gym? Was he always this tall? 

He looks painfully dashing and you’re unaware that you’ve made it to the laundry shop until Seungmin’s snapping his fingers in front of your face to get your attention. “Huh, wait. Sorry.” You flush in embarrassment at being caught daydreaming.

“Lost you for a second there.” 

You immediately get to work. You’ve already separated your clothes prior to coming here, so you begin to pour two caps of laundry detergent into the washer. Seungmin mirrors your actions so you can finish your laundry earlier. Pile by pile, you start adding your clothes to the washer and push the knob to turn it to normal cycle setting. 

While waiting, you and Seungmin simply sit on the floor and lean against the wall, staring at the washer with your head resting on his shoulder and your legs outstretched on the ground. 

You wonder when you should do your groceries. Maybe on Tuesday after your 1pm long test? You don’t think you have anything else to do on that day. Has Seungmin finished doing his groceries or would he want to come with you? You think he has a full day of classes on Tuesday. 

“What’s on your mind?”

“Huh, what?” You pull your head away from his shoulder, and Seungmin regrets asking what’s on your mind. It’s too late to double down though. 

“You were chewing on your lips. Assumed you were deep in thought.” You don’t know how chewing your lips has anything to do with being deep in thought. Have you always chewed down on your lips when you were thinking of something? Seungmin curses himself for letting that slip out so easily. 

“Just thinking about when I should do my groceries.” Seungmin quickly dismisses the topic in fear of his feelings being caught. It doesn’t seem like you want to talk much about groceries either. So, you fall back in your comfortable silence and your head is back on his shoulder and a smile instantly crawls its way to Seungmin’s lips while he leans his head on yours. 

“Why does it seem like it’s taking longer than usual?” You whine, staring at the washer with your eyes squinted a little. You look at the clock to see how much time has passed by and then back at the washer as if it’d speed up if you did. “Yeah, I’m tired of hanging out with you.” 

Seungmin’s head falls when you pull your own head back to stick your tongue out at him. He just chuckles at you, linking his arm around you so he can pull you back. “Come back. I was comfortable.” He wraps an arm around you so he can push your head back on his shoulder and your heart skips a beat when he nuzzles his head against yours once again. 

“Shouldn’t have said you were tired of hanging out with me then.” You mumble, afraid that your voice would quiver if you spoke any louder. Seungmin simply dismisses you with a wave of his head. “Yeah, yeah, I’m sorry.”

Time always moves faster when you’re actually enjoying the moment because a few minutes pass and the washer stops, and now you have to take your clothes out and place them in the dryer. 

Seungmin stays, telling you he’d help with folding up your clothes and bringing them back to your building – which is exactly what he does when the dryer finishes. And somehow, folding your clothes has turned into a competition between the two of you when he’s claiming he can fold much more than you can. 

He wins.

“It’s just because you have big hands!” 

“Your argument makes no sense.” 

“It does so! See, see. Look.”

You lift your hand mid-air, explaining to him why more work can be done with less effort if you have big hands compared to having smaller hands. It’s like walking less steps when you have longer legs. You’re not sure you’re making sense yourself, and you’re definitely not sure how to function when Seungmin reaches to meet his hand with yours. 

His hands are big.

“You do have tiny baby hands. Are your hands smaller than Felix’s?” The moment feels way too intimate for you. While you’re just comparing hand sizes, it's the warmth of his hands that catch you off guard and the feeling that you wouldn’t mind feeling his hand like this every day.

Seungmin thinks about how easy it’d be to just intertwine your hands together.

“Uh… I don’t know. We’ll have to see.” You instantly pull your hand back, packing your folded clothes back in your bags. You don’t know why your face won’t stop smiling at what just happened so you bury your head deep into the bags so Seungmin can’t see how red your cheeks are. 

“They’re definitely smaller. You don’t have to check.”

Seungmin doesn’t admit either that he doesn’t want you to press your hand against Felix’s like you did with his. 

six.

Even when you’re not together physically, he still finds a way to annoy you. 

“That’s what phones are made of!” He explains over the phone while you’re grocery shopping. Seungmin doesn’t seem to mind that his only view in your Facetime call is your double chin and the piles of food behind you. 

“What are you doing grocery shopping on a Sunday anyway? Isn’t this your sleeping day?” He says as if it was a matter-of-fact. “There are no rules stating I can’t grocery shop on a Sunday.” You deadpan before grabbing a bottle of shampoo from the shelves. 

The old lady looks at you like you’re crazy and you blush in embarrassment, pulling your cart away and moving to another section of the shop. It must look like you’re talking to yourself.

“You’re stressed, aren’t you?” Seungmin shifts from his position so he’s sitting up and he can hear you better which catches your attention. “So maybe I am a little.” You grab some toilet paper before you start to walk to the frozen section. 

“You know you can talk to me, right? I’m always here to carry the weight with you.” You smile at the rare words of affirmation from your best friend. It was never his love language. He showed his affection through his acts of service, so you appreciate that he’s lowering down his teasing to genuinely comfort you while you’re stressed.

“I know. It’s just…” So you talk to him. 

You rant to your best friend while you’re walking around the grocery store, and while numerous other old ladies and men look at you like you need to seek psychiatric help. You tell him about your blockmates and how they rarely put in work during group projects and activities. Seungmin knows it’s bothering you more than ever now since exams are nearing. That meant so were a shit ton of project deadlines. 

“Need me to talk to them?” You laugh, dismissing him while you examine the ice cream flavors available. “That’s just embarrassing for me. Though, I’ll admit they’d be scared shitless if The Kim Seungmin scolded them.” You lean down to pick up the Rocky Road tub for yourself and a Mint Choco for Seungmin.

“Don’t talk about me like I’m all that. I’m just… Minnie.” Your heart warms at how he uses your nickname for him. “And I’m serious. I  won’t hesitate talking to them if you need someone to knock some sense into them.” Your best friend scoffs at the thought of your group mates and the unnecessary amount of stress they’re putting you in.

“It’s alright. I’ll handle them. Do you need anything?” Your grocery list has long been crashed out and discarded in your pocket, now just looking around to see if there was anything else you could fit in your budget. 

“Do you think you can get me some eggs?” You hum, moving towards where the dairy products are. “Just one carton?” You ask, skimming through them before grabbing a dozen upon Seungmin’s approval. 

When he tells you he doesn’t need anything else, you move to fall in line so you can pay for your groceries. Only then do you realize that Seungmin’s wearing the fuzzy socks you got for him a few Christmases back. 

“I thought you threw those out.” 

“Hm?” Seungmin asks you to clarify.

“The socks I gave you as a gift.”

“I would never! They’re my happy socks. Also, wasn’t this the Christmas when you received that Ghibli inspired night light?” 

“Yeah! How’d you remember?”

“You were really happy to get it. You would not stop talking about it.” He smiles his Seungmin smile while recalling the memory. You had quite literally screamed when you opened it and Seungmin almost fell out of his ass thinking that you got hurt or injured. 

“Best. Gift. Ever.” You stressed every word, looking ahead to see you’re next in line. “I’m taking that as a challenge.” 

“Alright. I have to pay. I’ll talk to you later!”

“Text me…”

“I’ll text you when I get home, I know, I know. Bye!” You hang up the call just in time for the person before you to finish and you start loading your items on the counter. When you exit the shop, you spot Felix with his own bag of groceries as well. 

He greets you enthusiastically the moment he spots you, going in to give you a short hug and a small pat on your head. He’s smiling his sunshine smile as the two of you walk through the large shop together, and he’s kind enough to offer to carry one of your shopping bags for you as you exit. You decide to just take the train back to campus together as he lives in one of the in-campus dorms as well. 

“Soooo… you and Seungmin together yet?” Felix stabs the silence with a knife, immediately going in for the kill. You scrunch your face, shaking your head as you look at him with your eyes squinted. “Felix.”

“No, but like! He’s always so happy when he’s with you. And even when you’re not around, he goes on and on about you. I’m pretty sure Changbin knew everything about you before he even met you.”

“Don’t give me false hope.” You nibble on your lip, looking down at your groceries as Felix navigates the both of you towards the train station. 

Felix pauses, a small hand on your back to make sure he doesn’t lose you in the crowd of people waiting to catch the train. “It’s not false hope!” Felix is trying to find a way to properly articulate his thoughts to you. He’s not dumb – he sees the way Seungmin looks at you. Seungmin doesn’t need to tell him. 

“Okay, listen to this. So, one time I went to their dorm, right? Cause I was stress-baking and I made too many brownies and I know how much Innie loves them so I went there. It was a little late in the night, and when I walked in about to announce my presence, Seungmin saw me.”

You look at him confused, but let him continue the story.

“Turns out, you had fallen asleep on him while the three of you were watching a movie, and there was this look on his face. I can’t even begin to explain, but he had this look, and he told me to be quiet so I don’t wake you up.”

You just scoff at his story. 

“Fine, don’t believe me. One day, I’m gonna say I told you so.” He teases, and a faint smile forms on your face. “Let’s hope I get to hear that.” You feel your heart pumping at the thought. Felix seems really sincere with his words, but you didn’t want to hang onto something you don’t see yourself. 

It’s quiet after that when you enter the train. It’s a little packed so there isn’t a seat for you and Felix, but he protectively stands beside you and ghosts an arm around you so you don’t fall when the train accelerates. Felix walks you all the way to your building before he hands you back your grocery bag. 

“Bye Felix! Be safe.”

“Bye (name). Go and kiss Seungmin for me!” 

“I hate you.” 

He waves to you as he leaves and now the thought of kissing Seungmin is stuck in your head. Screw Lee Felix and his endless teasing. 

seven.

You don’t see Seungmin until Thursday that week. You’ve been stressed. Really stressed. And Seungmin’s well aware. 

He lets you rant to him at night, playing the part of your diary. He lets you be angry, he lets you be annoyed – without shame. He lets you feel every emotion and reminds you you’re valid for feeling that way.

You’re always thankful for Seungmin. You’re appreciative of the way he drops whatever he’s doing at any hint that you’re stressed just so he can listen. He doesn’t say anything while you rant, letting the moment be entirely yours. He simply plays his part as someone who’s there to hold the moment with you because he’s lucky enough to be the one to hear it. 

So, on a Thursday, you text him asking if it was okay for you to drop by the dorms. He says yes in an instant, but tells you to come in 2 hours. He must’ve been busy. 

But now, two hours later, you’re standing outside his dorm building with the carton of eggs you bought him and some jjajangmyeon. Jeongin, Seungmin’s roommate, is the one who greets you. 

“(Name)!”

“Jeongin!”

He rushes to hug you, wrapping his long arms around you and lifting you from the ground just a little before placing you down safely. “How long has it been since you visited us? I’m a little hurt.” He accompanies you to leave your student ID with the guard, holding up the conversation and offering to bring the plastic bag you’re holding.

Jeongin announces your arrival by knocking on the door. How unusual for someone who also lives in that same dorm he’s knocking. Maybe he didn’t bring the keys with him?

There’s a sound of vague stumbling and cursing and rushing around before the door swings open to reveal a sweating Seungmin. “Hey. Long time no see.” He lets out a breath, one you think he’s been holding before he steps aside to let the both of you in. He smiles at you before his eyes land on the plastic Jeongin’s holding. 

“My eggs! Thank you.” Seungmin pinches your cheeks in thanks before grabbing the bag from Jeongin who’s still chuckling over Seungmin’s very excited exclamation of his eggs. “And some jjajangmyeon, too? (Name), you sure know your way around my heart.” 

“You’re welcome.” You sit yourself on their couch, noticing that the place has been tidied up a little. You laugh at the boys’ effort to clean up before you came over. 

“You feeling better?” Seungmin plops down at the spot next to you, fixing his gaze on you. 

“A little.” (Way better now that I’m here with you–).

“Good. Being stressed ages you faster. You’re already like half fifty or something.”

(--so I can strangle you.)

Jeongin nudges Seungmin suddenly, clearing his throat. You look at the younger boy suspiciously and suddenly Seungmin’s sweating again despite not doing anything. “I have a surprise.” 

“You… have a surprise?” You tilt your head in confusion. Seungmin tells you to wait one moment as he waddles towards the door of their bathroom. What surprise could possibly be linked to their bathroom. “Seungmin. I swear to god if you show me one of your shit–”

Then, he opens the door and out comes running… Fang? 

“Did you kidnap the campus dog?!” You shoot out of your seat, mouth dropping at the sight of the dog who’s excitedly jumping and demanding for your attention. “I was kidding when I talked about kidnapping them!” 

“You said they’d cheer you up no matter what!” Your initial shock dissipates when Fang looks so cute barking and jumping at you, so you sit back down and he immediately hops on their couch to lay down on your lap.

“I helped too.” Jeongin states proudly, sitting on your left so you’re in between him and Seungmin who has taken the spot on your right. “You made the baby help you steal?” Seungmin rolls his eyes, rubbing Fang’s head. “He was more than happy to do it.” 

Only then do you allow your heart to explode in your chest. Seungmin actually kidnapped the campus dog to surprise you because you’d been stressed for the week. Your emotions feel heightened, and you feel an overwhelming wave of love wash over you at its purest, unsolicited form. 

He did this for you just because. He did it without expecting anything in return. He did it because you briefly mentioned how they made your day when you saw them that one time you ate dinner together. 

You can’t do anything but stare at him for a moment, unable to really pay attention to Fang, not that he really needs it. Jeongin’s giving him enough attention by playing around with him. You’re absolutely dumbfounded at the heavy implication of care in his actions. Here he was next to you, holding with him all your feelings you’ve had for years. 

“Thank you, Minnie.” You lean in to give him a small kiss on his cheek before you’re getting up to play with Fang and Jeongin. His pretty brown eyes go wide. There’s a deep inhalation while he sits there after you’d kissed his cheek. He’s taken by surprise, almost frozen in his spot. 

He’d kidnap all the campus dogs and cats just to feel your lips on his cheek again. 

He’s snapped out of his daze by the sound of knocking and almost immediately Jeongin’s rushing Fang back into their bathroom to hide him and their filthy crimes. They were going to return him. They were simply… borrowing.

Seungmin answers the door once Jeongin safely hides the cute puppy. 

It’s Lee Minho. 

“It’s just Minho!” Minho invites himself inside, waving at you once he spots you. “Why are you here?” 

“I invited him so he could cook dinner for us. My wallet’s bleeding and I’m craving a home cooked meal.” Jeongin responds, opening the bathroom door to let Fang out again who instantly warms up to Minho. There’s obvious relief in his voice at not being caught. He was an accessory to the crime after all. 

“Only if I get a hug from Seungminie.” Minho’s smirking, inching closer and closer to Seungmin who puts his arms out in front of him to block himself from the boy. “Move! You’re dirty! And don’t call me that.” 

Minho all but laughs at Seungmin’s response, already having predicted it. He ignores Seungmin’s passiveness when it comes to affection, choosing instead to pet the puppy by his feet. “I’m not even gonna ask why you stole the campus dog.”

“We’re just borrowing him!” 

“Can you steal Mushroom for me too?” Minho pats your head affectionately when he passes by you to make his way to the kitchen, looking through the pots and pans and ingredients to figure out what he’s going to be cooking tonight. 

“Depends how much you’re willing to pay me.” Seungmin grins evilly, and Minho all but shakes his head at the younger boy.

It goes on like this for a while. You help Minho out sometimes at the kitchen because Seungmin and Jeongin cannot for the life of them cook without causing a fire, and then Minho pushes you to go back and play with Fang since Seungmin went through all the trouble kidnapping him for you (Jeongin couldn’t keep the secret and told Minho right away why they decided to steal the puppy). 

You feel genuine happiness when you’re around them. The feeling remains even when you’ve sat down to eat. 

Jeongin and Minho also can’t help but notice the happiness radiating off of Seungmin who’s staring at you and your smile when he thinks no one is looking.

eight.

Kim Seungmin’s friends are basically an extension of yours, like how your friends are an extension of his. 

While some are closer with others, you don’t mind each other’s presence. Seungmin’s friend group is way bigger than yours – 8 boys including himself. As for you, you liked sticking with Winter, Chaeryeong, and Ryujin. 

Hanging out in the big field of your school was supposed to be only amongst you and the 3 girls, but when the boys caught wind of your plans, they asked if they could tag along. 

That’s how you find yourselves sitting on the field’s grass and chatting while some play a variation of volleyball by the side. 

Everyone’s doing their own little thing, happy to just spend the afternoon with friends after a long week of classes. Ryujin’s bullying Chan, untying his shoelaces every chance she gets. Chaeryeong and Minho are discussing amongst themselves about their dance showcase coming up since they were both majoring in the same course (with Changbin constantly trying to bother them both – you wish Chaeryeong would punch him again so you could catch it on video this time). Hyunjin’s asking for Winter’s advice since he’s been tinkering with the idea of taking up Fashion Design. The rest of the boys are playing around with the exception of Seungmin who’s laying down on the picnic blanket you’d laid out. 

“You mentioned you had a quiz today, right? How was that?” You look down at Seungmin even though he has an arm draped over his eyes to shield them from the sun. 

“I think I did alright. Bolted out of there as soon as they started discussing their answers.” 

The boy simply laughs, tuning out everyone else in favor of listening to your voice. It doesn’t last long though when Jisung is bothering everyone to play volleyball together. He claims it’s perfect since you were 12 total so exactly 6 people would be on each time like an actual game. 

Feeling nice today, you decided to join in on his idea. Jisung is thankful for the support. It’s always his ideas that are turned down – though he’s to blame most of  the time. Who thinks swimming in an ice cold lake is a good idea to hangout? 

It’s only now that he thinks of something that’s normal to do so everyone gives him a chance.

So, you play. You, Ryujin, Chan, Felix, Minho and Hyunjin in one team and Seungmin, Changbin, Jeongin, Chaeryeong, Winter, and Jisung in another. 

Your team wins both rounds. Seungmin’s just complaining about Changbin’s good at nothing while you switch courts to play a third round (even though your team’s already won). “That’s embarrassing.” Minho jests at the opposite team, laughing when Jisung pouts instantly. 

“We’re just going to win again. Do you really wanna play another round?” Ryujin joins in on the teasing, finally creating a temporary truce with Chan as they were on the same team. 

“Mean!” Chaeryeong remarks before slumping her shoulders. “She’s right though. They’re definitely gonna win again.” 

“I hate all of you” are Seungmin’s last words before you play another round. The game goes by really quickly until Jisung accidentally spikes the ball in your direction and he’s immediately down on his knees apologizing to you. 

Everyone’s eyes instantly land on Seungmin who’s already making his way to where you’re seated on the ground. 

“I’m okay. It’s okay Ji!” Despite your verbal reassurance to everyone, he still places a fond hand on your head before he holds your chin, gently tilting your head on both sides to see if you were hit in the face. 

Jisung’s now apologizing to both you and Seungmin.

Chan jumps on the opportunity to start taunting Jisung and how Seungmin was gonna be mad at him and Jisung’s sad attempts at getting the boy to hug him will all be in vain. “Chan, you’re my roommate. I thought you were supposed to be on my side!” 

“I’m sorry, the roommate contract doesn’t cover taking your side.” 

Seungmin doesn’t let the game continue after that, but nobody really minds, happy to finally take a break from playing. 

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Doting Seungmin is adorable as he’s wiping the sweat from your forehead, asking you a million times if you were hurt. He tells you it’s because he can’t pay in case you've broken a bone or something. You know better than that. 

He was just being his ‘tsundere’ self. 

“Yo, you guys ready for the midterms exams soon?” Chan opens up and a loud groan immediately leaves Ryujin’s lips in response. “Don’t even remind me.” 

“I’m honestly just excited for the university festival right after.” Felix quips, hugging his knees to his chest. Winter and Hyunjin instantly agree, talking about wanting to help out with the booths. 

“I wonder which artists are gonna perform. There’s no lineup yet, right?” Changbin asks, and everyone responds with a variation of ‘no’ or ‘I don’t know’ along with a list of some artists they wished would make an appearance. 

“Ya, lovebirds!” Minho calls out to the both of you which catches your attention. “You’re going to the university festival after exams, right?” 

Your eyes light up at the mention of the festival and you eagerly nod, completely disregarding how Minho called you lovebirds. Seungmin takes note of your excitement, smiling goofily to himself before replacing it with a straight face upon facing his friends. He knows they’ll never let him live it down if they caught him with that smile on his face.

Seungmin just watches as you start talking about which booths you wished to see and which artists you were hoping to perform, and how you were wondering if there was going to be a fireworks display at night. 

Your grin is so wide and fond and excited that Seungmin can’t help but let his own smile unknowingly linger. Minho has a shit-eating grin on his face at the sight.

nine.

Hell week – the week before midterm exams – comes really quick, and soon you find yourself living through Seungmin’s coffee machine and 5 hours of sleep. 

The campus library becomes your second home as does a lot of people from numerous departments, studying until ungodly hours and sneaking in cups of hot coffee. So, after eating dinner, you walk the familiar steps towards the library with your best friend. 

Seungmin also seems to be running low on sleep, eyes drooping before you even made it to the library. However, ever the top student that he is, he fights through the exhaustion. He’s thankful for the distraction. 

Ever since you mentioned your excitement for the university festival and the fireworks display, Seungmin’s mind has been eating at him to use it as the perfect opportunity to confess to you. It’s the only thing that replays in his mind when he isn’t doing anything — all the possible outcomes to a confession and all the possible ways to confess.

So, he’s more than grateful for the distraction. 

Not so much the one in front of him right now though. You’ve been at the library for around an hour now, books and papers scattered around the table. Seungmin’s tapping his pen against his lips, elbow propped up on the wood of the table. Criminal law has long been discarded in his head, he’s read it way too many times for the past week in preparation for the exams. 

“Stop looking. You’re distracting me.” You whisper for Seungmin to pay attention, not even bothering to look up from your own book as you shut your eyes closed to try the photographic memory you clearly don’t have before flipping to the next page.

“How narcissistic of you to think I’m staring at you.” He rolls his eyes just to be annoying before his cheek falls against his fist, eyes glazing over you again. He has little shame in his unabashed staring. 

It’s how he notices your gentle shivering at the airconditioning of the library. “Did you forget to bring a jacket?”

You don’t hear him, and you don’t really have to as he’s already taking his hoodie off, dropping it on top of your book to grab your attention. “You’re shaking.” When you’re about to retort, saying he’d get cold too — he goes back to studying, placing his earphones in even though he isn’t listening to any music.

You notice it’s your favorite hoodie of his, the Dodgers gray hoodie, once you put it on. Almost immediately you’re engulfed in his warmth and his scent and you’re grateful for the jacket because your ass has been shaking for the last hour. 

Seungmin’s attempt to get back to studying falls short when he catches a glimpse of you in his jacket that’s clearly too big for you. 

His thoughts drift to the color of your eyes and the way your hair frames your face so prettily and how you look so cute with the sleeves of his jacket falling beyond where your hands are. He thinks about how it’d feel like if he went in for the first kiss, pressing his lips on yours without it being nerve-wracking. 

He imagines everything and anything in that short amount of time, his notes discarded in favor of admiring you. 

Seungmin is interrupted when you drop a copy of his perfectly written notes (from a class he took a year ago), asking him about a specific topic since you’re taking the class this year. He readjusts himself on the library seats, the ones he hates but puts up because you enjoy studying in the library so much. 

Leaning in forward, Seungmin starts explaining to you the concepts of Politics and Governance and Health Laws. He glances at you with a frown when you seem to be staring at his notes blankly, having a hard time grasping all the information at once.

“You look like you’re fighting for your life in there.”

“That’s cause I am! How am I supposed to pass this class? Can it just be over so we can be at the university fest already?” Seungmin leans across the table to flick your forehead gently.

“You’re more concerned about the university fest than passing your exams.” 

“Okay, mean.” You say to him with a frown, looking around to see if anyone’s looking before flashing him a middle finger. He rolls his eyes, pushing your notes further towards you before speaking again. “I’m not wrong though.”

He pokes you with a pen to get your attention, telling you to focus up before he’s explaining the concepts to you again. You try better to understand them now, repeating some of the things he tells you and answering his follow-up questions to make sure you really understand.

The soft smile he gives you when you answer correctly is enough motivation to perfect your exam. He looks like such a boyfriend right now. Lending you his hoodie, tutoring you on your exams, leaning in and smiling that soft smile directed at you. It takes everything in your head not to daydream of what it’d be like if he was actually yours. 

You have to remind yourself he isn’t yours. He’s just your best friend. Your stupid boyfriend material best friend. 

Similarly, Seungmin’s telling himself to get it together. He needs to stay focused on the upcoming exams and stop thinking about what it’d feel like to be yours.

ten.

It goes like this for a few more days until midterms week rolls through. And even then, you’d hold yourself in the library after an exam to study for the next. 

Sometimes you’d be joined by Winter, and sometimes Jisung and Changbin would tag along which usually resulted in you trying to muffle your laughter underneath sweater sleeves. Who knew you could sneak in 12 cups of coffee in the library before actually getting caught? 

Ever since then, Jisung’s been banned from your study sessions with Seungmin.

Tomorrow’s the last day of your exams, and you’re at Seungmin and Jeongin’s dorm to eat dinner before you head out to the library for the last time. 

Seungmin’s out to buy dinner so you’re left with Jeongin who keeps trying to pry into yours and Seungmin’s non-existent relationship. “But you’ve definitely made out before, right?” Your face grows redder and redder every second that Jeongin speaks and you hit him with their couch throw pillow to rebut. 

“We have not!”

“You’re right. Seungmin would’ve never shut up about it. But like, why not? Just get it over with and kiss!”

“We’re just best friends.”

“That’s what they all say.” Jeongin turns his full attention at you, smirking to himself before he starts making kissing noises. “Oh Minnie, kiss me already!” He purposely changes the pitch of his voice to try and imitate yours and you pretend not to feel the warmth on your cheeks.

“I’m gonna end up killing you before Seungmin does.”

He acts as if he doesn’t hear your comment (threat) and continues to tease you. “Seungminie, please fu—“

“Oh my god, shut up!” You almost jump at the poor boy upon realizing what he’s about to say next, and Seungmin arrives just in time before you can strangle the life out of his roommate.

“Am I interrupting something?” He glances at the two of you with an eyebrow raised, placing down the takeout containers on the table and motioning for you to sit so you can eat already.

“I think you might’ve just saved my life.” You send another glare at Jeongin and he raises his hands in surrender. 

Seungmin just chuckles at this, coming up to sit beside you before he’s distributing the containers to the three of you. “What did you even do that made her jump you?” 

“Everything he does makes me want to jump him.” You bark, squinting your eyes at the boy seated across from you and Seungmin.

“Woah, woah. (Name), I don’t see you like that. So eager to jump me?” You scoff loudly at his response, flicking a plastic spoon in his direction. 

“I’m kidding, I’m kidding! We both know who you really want to jump.” 

The plastic fork follows with the threat that if he doesn’t shut up, the hot soup from your noodles is gonna be next.

“Alright, both of you calm down and eat.” Almost instantly, Jeongin’s hunching over his chair, terrible posture leaned forward to start twisting the noodles around his chopsticks. Seungmin angles himself close to you so that your shoulders are brushing, leaning down and blowing on his food before he starts to eat as well.

You try and fail to hide a smile at the physical contact.

On your way to the library, you exchange reviewers to ask each other questions. It’s a good way to retain your memory on the concepts. Jeongin doesn’t seem to know any of the answers to his questions, and Seungmin makes that face exclusive to when he senses something horrible is going to happen — in this case, Jeongin’s grade on this subject.

“Don’t worry. God’s gonna give me a miracle tomorrow.”

“Did he tell you that?” You nudge Seungmin’s shoulder, laughing at their banter when Jeongin sticks his tongue out at your best friend. 

“Of course you’re gonna pass your exams tomorrow. Pre-law students are nerds. You fit right in.” Jeongin snorts which earns him a smack from his roommate. “Do you wanna get kicked out of the dorms?”

The rest of the night falls smoothly with the three of you minding your own business (Jeongin instantly gets distracted by his phone). It’s only before midnight that you find Seungmin asleep in front of you, head resting on the wooden table of the library and eyes closed peacefully. 

You glance at him and you almost feel bad you have to wake him up. Your heart flutters at the small smile gracing his lips, snapping a quick photo so you can go back to this moment forever.

You brush his skin gently, and a smile appears on his face. It’s soft, reserved, but it feels like everything to you. Something in the way he smiled at your touch has you feeling something you can’t quite identify. It makes your heart hurt in s good way.

“Minnie, wake up.” Your voice breaks him out of his nap. He glances up, sleep still evident in his eyes. Then, his dreamy smile returns. 

“Sorry.” You apologize to the boy while he moves to tidy up his things. He must’ve fallen asleep while waiting for you to finish studying. 

“Don’t apologize.” There’s that sincere, intense look in his eyes that makes sure to meet your gaze, so you know he’s being serious, yet his words are gently spoken. He doesn’t want you to feel bad. It was his choice to wait for you.

“Go straight to sleep when you get back, okay? I know you love pulling allnighters, but it’s not good for you.” 

On normal circumstances, he’d protest, telling you that he was still able to get a good 4 hours of sleep, but the genuine concern swimming in your eyes has him sealing his mouth shut and nodding instead.

“Alright.”

Seungmin finds he’d do anything for you.

eleven.

After you finish your last test, you get a text from Seungmin telling you to come to JYP Diner. 

He explains that the boys wanted to eat together after completing the midterm exams, and that you should try inviting Ryujin and Winter as well (Chaeryeong was already there as she shared her last exam schedule with Minho).

You reply that Winter had retired for the day, and that Ryujin still had an exam later this afternoon. He tells you to hurry up and get your ass to the diner.

As soon as you open the door, Seungmin’s eyes land on you and the annoyed look on his face melts into a fond smile. He’s quick to get up, greeting you by the door before wrapping his arm around your shoulder to draw you to where they were seated. 

The inside of the diner is warm and pleasant. You’re thankful for the differing scenery of the calm diner compared to the stress of your university.

The boys and Chaeryeong wave at you when you make it to the table, and you fall on the empty seat right next to your best friend. 

“Oh, (name). You should’ve heard him when you were still on your way here.” Minho quips, grin growing when Seungmin kicks him from under the table.

“Why’s (name) taking so long?” 

“Has (name) texted you guys?”

The rest of the boys join in, overexaggerating their imitation of Seungmin’s words from earlier. Barely concealed laughters echo around your booth when your best friend shoots them a friendly show of his middle finger before he shushes them, asking you what you wanted to eat as everyone else had already ordered. 

“Hey, where’s Felix?” You only now notice the boy’s absence, and Hyunjin snorts in response. 

“Immediately fell asleep after his Advanced Calculus exam. He was actually in tears while studying for it last night.” 

“Just like Jeongin then.” Seungmin earns a rather harsh nudge from Jeongin. “That was supposed to be a secret!” 

There’s a gentle smile eating at your lips once your food arrives and your sleep-deprived friends start gobbling up the food as if they were sentenced to life and this was their last meal. There’s always that unidentifiable feeling of comfort when you’re with them, and you’re grateful to have found such friends. 

“What’s wrong?” Seungmin asks you quietly, noticing that you haven't started eating yet. Humming, you shake your head with the same small smile on your face. 

“It’s nothing.” 

Your after-exam celebration is continued over teasing and conversations about the university festival, and one by one, everyone starts excusing themselves to go back home. As usual, Seungmin walks you home.

He doesn’t let you walk into your building immediately upon arrival, asking you to wait for a moment. You comply, tilting your head with an amused smile on your face. 

He’s rummaging through his bag now, looking for something before he pulls out two… tickets? He shoves one in your direction and it takes you a while to realize it’s a ticket to the university festival concert. They weren’t even selling yet, and when they did, it sold out pretty fast.

“How did you…?”

“Chan’s part of the student organizers.” 

You immediately jump to coddle the boy in your arms, squeezing his rather larger body and pressing your cheek on his chest as you repeatedly say ‘thank you’. Your eyes are squeezed shut from beaming too much and your smile’s a little crooked from how genuine it comes out. 

Seungmin can’t properly tell you that it’s no problem. He finds his words jumbled up because the sight he’s subjected to is so… beautiful. He’s blushing and somehow it’s making you blush too. 

There’s something tucked beneath your smile, a certain kind of shyness in the way your eyes crinkle. It’s beautiful, as it always has been, but there was something about it that had Seungmin staring at your lips and back at your eyes. It’s like he’s being pulled in, and he’s unaware that he’s slowly and slowly minimizing the gap between you. 

Just when he’s about to bite the bullet, an unknown voice startles him.

“Is that the little menace?” 

Fucking hell.

Karen’s marching her way down the steps to where Seungmin’s standing, and you know it’s time he goes before Karen catches up to the boy. 

“I guess I’ll see you later.” You laugh, but there’s that hint of shyness again, of being flustered as you wave at him. And then, you turn around to head inside your building.

Seungmin bolts back to his dorms, and he spends the rest of the afternoon thinking about what could’ve happened if goddamn Crazy Karen would’ve just kept her mouth shut. 

twelve.

The university festival comes really fast, and you’re more than excited to spend it with your friends.

“Give me one second.” Chaeryeong’s gathering products from her desk and makeup bag, gathering them up on the floor and telling you to sit still as she rummages through her multiple tubes and brushes. 

She maneuvers your head so you’re facing her before she slathers something on her palms, transferring the product to your face and rubbing it gently on your skin. A thin layer of concealer follows before she’s brushing powder on your face. 

Earlier, you had asked if she could do your makeup for you and she excitedly replied with a ‘yes’ and a ‘come over right away’. 

It’s how you find multiple brushes being dabbed on your face, hues of pink on your cheeks and a little on your nose before she’s patting a few glitters on the lids of your eyes. She lets you put on the mascara yourself so she doesn’t accidentally poke you with the wand (like she did the last time she did your makeup).

Then she’s on the search for the perfect shade of lipstick. “Let’s just put a little. Seungmin’s just gonna wipe it all off anyway when you two eventually kiss tonight.” 

“Oh my god, Ryeong.” 

“What! I’m not wrong.” She’s giggling as she tells you to part your lips slightly, applying the soft pink shade on your lips. “You look so pretty.” She coos more to herself, proud of her creation before she’s pinching your cheeks lightly. 

She shoves a mirror to your face so you can reap the results of her hard work. She was right.

Chaeryeong did a wonderful job highlighting your natural features and letting the makeup work naturally on your face. You smile brightly, giving her a quick hug and showering her in ‘thank you’s. 

“Okay, now get changed. Go, go! We’re gonna be late.” 

When you step out, you’re met with the sight of Chaeryeong in a cute, sleeveless dress, leather jacket and fishnets. She looks stunning as she playfully turns around to show off her whole fit. “Damn, one chance?”

“Yeah, right. One chance with Seungmin, you mean.” 

“Actually, I’d like to take a million chances with Seungmin.” She cracks into a fit of giggles. “You’re so down horrendous. Look, with the way you look, I’m sensing the first chance will be taken tonight.” 

You give yourself a final do-over with Chaeryeong’s words, looking at yourself in the mirror. You’re wearing some loose slacks and a black tube top with a cream colored cardigan. For someone who didn’t have enough time to consult Winter and her amazing fashion sense, you’d say you did pretty well at dressing yourself prettily. 

“Okay, okay. Come here, let me put lip gloss on you. I think some of the boys are here already.” You comply, letting her fix up some lip gloss on you before applying some on herself.

“They’re picking us up?”

“Yup. Minho, Jeongin, and Seungmin, I think?”

“Seungmin?” You thought you’d have more time to gather yourself and your feelings on the walk to the big field where all the booths were set up. 

“Yeah, their dorm is nearest to mine. Come on.” 

When you and Chaeryeong step out of her building, the boys are dramatically whistling and clapping their hands. Only when you’re near them do they spill their genuine compliments at the way you two look. 

Seungmin’s knee-jerking reaction at seeing you so prettily dressed-up is to just stare at you unabashedly. There’s so much he wants to say, but his eyes remain glued open and his mouth shut. 

“Yah, stop staring.” Minho smacks the back of Seungmin’s head and he’s stuttering out for something to say. He wants to tell you that you look beautiful, wants to say something charming to woo you over but he’s left with his mouth parted. 

You just laugh at their exchange, taking your spot next to Seungmin as the five of you start walking to the big field. Seungmin looks so painfully attractive with his white shirt and jeans and converse and varsity jacket. He looks like the epitome of a boyfriend – so painfully dashing but also very painfully out of your league. 

Meanwhile, Seungmin’s still kicking himself over for not being able to tell you how beautiful he thinks you look. He’s just hoping he’s presented with another opportunity to tell you – and he hopes by then, he’ll have enough courage to say it. 

Earlier today, Jeongin and Minho gave him quite the heart-to-heart talk and convinced him to confess his feelings tonight. Besides, as they said, it was the perfect opportunity.

“You like her. You have for like a few years now. Stop being a pussy and tell her.” Minho’s words are rather straightforward. Jeongin groans before punching his arm. 

Minho grabs at his arm, shrugging his shoulders before continuing to snack on the chips he had stolen. 

“I’m not telling her.” Seungmin mutters to the boys, dejected. “I’m gonna ruin our friendship.”

“How sure are you?” Minho is stubborn as he continues to push Seungmin. “I’m not. But I don’t want to know.”

This time, Jeongin interjects. “Are you sure you don’t want to know? How would you live with yourself if she liked you all along and you let go of that chance so easily?” 

“I won’t.”

“Exactly. No one lives a happy life entirely within their comfort zone. If you like her so much then she’s worth dragging yourself out of that zone.” Seungmin stiffens at his roommate’s words, mind racing to truly think about what he’s saying. 

Since when did Jeongin get so wise? 

As if Minho was thinking the same thing, he narrows his eyes before staring at the youngest of the group. “You got something you wanna share with the class? How come you know so much about asking someone out?”

“The two of you are just stupid. Anyways, just do it.” 

The waters Jeongin’s treading on are dangerous, but well worth it if it meant Seungmin’s genuine happiness. He thinks it’s time Seungmin ripped off the poor excuse of a bandaid he taped around his heart and deemed all good now.

“Yeah, or I’ll do it myself.” Minho throws him a sly grin, voice overflowing with mischief. 

“Absolutely not.” Seungmin shakes his head in protest, eyes gaping in horror. He immediately grabs the bag of chips from Minho’s lap which the boy immediately tries to grab back. “What’re you gonna do to stop me?”

“Tell Chaeryeong how you wanted her to be your dance partner soooo bad with some screenshots of your messages to me.” Minho should’ve known better than to challenge the one boy that held multiple threats towards each one of them. 

His argument was unfair because he and Jeongin were the only people he told that to. Minho’s mood darkens, pulling back the bag of chips with force and resigning from his evil plans of telling you how Seungmin feels about you. 

Minho valued his pride more than anything else.

“Look, I’ll do it myself.” Seungmin huffs, rubbing the back of his neck and falling back on his bed to stare at the ceiling. “I think.”

Then, Minho’s phone buzzes from right next to him.

“The girls are almost ready. Let’s start walking.”

thirteen.

When the five of you arrive, most of your friends are already there.

Chan’s the first one that sees you. 

“Finally.” He greets you and Chaeryeong with a big hug before bumping his fists with the boys. What is it with men and their fist bumps? 

Before you can mingle with the rest of the group, Chan leans in discreetly (or at least, as discreet as he could) and whispers to the boys. “Watch out if you’re wearing shoes. Ryujin’s been messing with everyone’s shoelaces the moment we got here.”

You laugh at his warning. Ryujin’s actually such a menace. 

“That sounds just about right.” You pat him in the back before going in to give Ryujin a hug. Her face immediately lights up when she sees you and Chaeryeong, wrapping an arm around the both of you as she starts to move away from the boys.

“Ryujin has more rizz than you.” 

“I’m not talking to someone who cried while studying Advanced Calculus.”

“Noted.” Felix instantly shuts up, moving to talk about another topic with Hyunjin who's laughing his ass off at Seungmin’s response at the poor boy.

“We’re just waiting on Changbin, Winter, and… Jisung?” 

Chan’s head counting the group, pointing at each person and mentally noting down the numbers, making sure that no one was missing. You remember the time Felix had accidentally joined in with Beomgyu’s friend group when he thought he was following Seungmin’s feet. Chan almost lost his mind.

The timing couldn’t be more perfect when they show up from a distance. Jisung seems to be talking Winter’s ear off and Changbin’s trying to pull him back. Winter looks a bit overstimulated with his level of energy, but divulges in the conversation anyway. Jisung appreciates it. You smile at how easy your friends got on with Seungmin’s friends. 

Felix excitedly points at the arcade booths lining up, some shooting games, prize wheels, virtual reality. Everyone else reciprocates the excitement, immediately running up to the booths and getting in line. Meanwhile, Jeongin’s dragging Minho at the claw machine. He’s always been notorious for having luck when it came to the claw machine games, and Jeongin was taking his chances the moment he found a bread plushie in the glass case. 

“Get it yourself.”

“Chaeryeong!” 

Minho shuts him up with a bread plushie he immediately wins for Jeongin. The youngest boy happily holds his prize and keeps his mouth shut. 

Chan easily wins Ryujin whatever she asks for in exchange for her leaving his shoelaces alone. Ryujin is easily bribed when it comes to food and free prizes and she knows Chan would probably win most of the games she wanted. Jisung and Changbin were comparing their strengths and boasting about their muscles by the punching machine, and Chaeryeong’s dominating the shooting games with Winter.

“Oh my god, the Sunshine Harvest has a booth. I’ll be back.” Before anyone from the group can accompany you, you’re running towards the direction of the booth. Seungmin understands your rush. Their mango shakes were probably on the way to selling out fast if you didn’t get there sooner. 

When you don’t return in the next 20 minutes, Seungmin is sweating frantically. He knows you can handle yourself, but there was now a chock full of new people who had just arrived and were littering the area. It’s when you don’t pick up his calls that tips him over. 

“I’m gonna go look for (name).” Chan nods understandingly, and Seungmin disappears in a flash. He thanks his parents for his height at this very moment, scanning through the groups of people and excusing himself so he can navigate towards the Sunshine Harvest booth. 

His heart drops to his stomach when he doesn’t see you there. But just when he’s about to panic some more, he spots someone hunched over to the very far left, away from the crowd, discarded mango shake container to the side. He practically leaps out of the bench he’s standing on, jogging in your direction. 

He doesn’t have the heart to scold you when he finds you playing with Mushroom.

“(Name).” You jump back at the sudden voice, but instantly smile upon realizing it’s just Seungmin. You finally say goodbye to the cat, grabbing your empty bottle before standing up. “Sorry, did I take too long?” 

“No, it’s okay.” You just don’t have to know how frantic he was while he was looking everywhere for you. 

On the way back to your friends, you don’t realize his hand is glued to the small of your waist so he doesn’t lose you again. 

When the group decides to split up, Minho and Jeongin are instantly sending Seungmin stupid dirty looks with their stupid wiggling eyebrows. He knows if he doesn’t confess tonight, Minho might actually do it for him.

The rest of the afternoon goes by so fast. You applaud the university and the student body for organizing the fest. The afternoon transitions to night so smoothly, you don’t even realize the amount of time that passed by. 

The bright lights and the loud music is so exhilarating, and it makes you feel so alive — the most alive you’ve felt in the week. There are times when you dance along to the music, exaggerating your movements and Seungmin laughs with his head rolled back and you’d embarrass yourself over and over to keep hearing him laugh.

Seungmin takes the weight off your chest so easily. All he does is pat your head and squeeze your cheeks and accompany you wherever you wish to go and suddenly, you feel lighter. Happier. And it is so, so loud. Everyone around you is talking, crowded together but you can’t hear them. All you can focus on is the feeling of his hand in yours to make sure he doesn’t lose you in the crowd and the way it fits perfectly. Like his hand was meant to be crafted to hold yours.

It’s how you continue to feel when you find yourselves amongst the crowd of the concert, pretending to know the lyrics of the songs playing, screaming at each other when you actually recognize the song. Everything you do with him is something you wish you could capture in a photo.

He’s singing, and you look at him with a silent glee in your eyes, hoping to touch the same greatness that Kim Seungmin always held and hoping to burn the memory of his singing and his soft eyes and his hand in yours. You almost feel like flying. 

His eyes are warm when you look at them, golden brown peeking down at you with fondness. You’ve always loved his eyes the most. It has always been his most obvious tell — of the things they feel and the things they’ve made you feel when he stared at you a little longer than normal.

Your lips quirk up in a smile, and you find yourself singing along to the songs with him. You were never the greatest singer, but with him, you felt like loveliest melodies and tunes flow out of you comfortably.

This time, Seungmin allows himself a quick glance at you from his peripheral vision, admiring your naturally dusted cheeks and your beaming eyes and your messed up hair from the wind and from running around all night. How could you stand there and sing without a care in the world and smile and look so, so beautiful.

And there are many things Seungmin considers to be beautiful. He loves the sunrise and the sunsets and the way the sky blends into a perfect mix of colors along the horizon before the moon chases the sun away. He loves the flowers and the trees on his way to his classes and the wind’s breeze wrapping you in a cold blanket. He loves the stars and their relentless twinkling and how they coat the night sky, making sure the moon is never lonely. But above all, he loves you and your smile and the way you chew on your lips when you think and how you make him feel like he can touch the sky. 

Seungmin finds he’d sacrifice the sunset and sunrise and the twinkling stars if it meant he could call you and all of you, his. 

He doesn’t say anything when he drops his varsity jacket on your shoulders and he doesn’t meet your eyes when you look up at him to thank him.

You make Seungmin trip over his own words. All tangled in adoration and longing. Between all the galaxies and universes, Seungmin concludes he’s lucky to have landed under the same stars as you. 

With all this in mind, Seungmin’s sure he’s upgraded way beyond the like. He’s in love with you — in the hopeless, clumsy, exhilarating kind of way. And he finds that loving you is something he wants to experience no matter the outcome. 

If he was told you’d never feel the same and if he’d still take the chance to fall in love with you, he’d say yes. It’s a yes again and again and again. Always a yes. He’d prefer the unrequited over never knowing how it feels to love you and every part of you. 

“(Name)?”

Despite the loudness of the music and the fireworks and the people around you, you find Seungmin’s voice cut through them all. 

Looking up at him, you find him looking at you in a way he never has done before. In the way he’s done so many times when you weren’t looking. There’s something swirling in his eyes, some kind of longing and desire. 

I've been alone for too long

You've been there all along

The distance between you is closing. Seungmin’s heart is racing when he peels his hand from yours in favor of cradling your cheek gently, tracing along your jaw and soaking in every detail about your face.

Ethereal love

I will choose you now and everyday

Seungmin’s putting everything on the line, stepping into the unknown, heartbeat pounding in his ears. There’s still time for you to pull away, to run away from the certainty he feels about you, to shatter him into a million pieces. 

He hopes you won’t. 

His eyes flutter shut, but when he opens them again, you’re already gone.

fourteen.

It’s the first time Seungmin doesn’t blow up your notifications. 

Jeongin confiscates his phone when he comes home to Seungmin downing a bottle of vodka. He’s immediately concerned for his roommate’s wellbeing and what could’ve led to Seungmin’s sudden want to get drunk. 

“Hey, what happened?” He sits on the ground to accompany Seungmin, grabbing the bottle when he sees that it’s almost empty. 

“Let me sulk properly.” Then, he’s grabbing the bottle back from Jeongin, chugging down the remains before harshly setting it down on the ground. A sharp sigh leaves his throat before he leans in to rest his head on Jeongin’s shoulder. And he sits there and lets him.

Jeongin lets him because Seungmin needed someone right now. “I fucked up, Innie.” 

It’s the most fragile Jeongin’s ever heard from his roommate and he takes Seungmin’s hand to let him know that he’s listening. “Tried to kiss (name). I ruined everything.” 

Jeongin’s face twists in confusion, heart rising in his own throat. He knows you like Seungmin back. And if Seungmin tried to kiss you, he would’ve thought the result of that would be a very happy phone call from his roommate – not him drinking until he forgets.

Seungmin feels pathetic, and Jeongin swears to get to the bottom of things. With sleepy fucked up eyes, Seungmin looks up at the boy, chin tilted up and lips quivering. “Do you think she’ll forgive me?”

“I know she will. Come here.” Seungmin bows his head faintly, head falling on Jeongin’s chest as he allows himself to be hugged – allows himself to be vulnerable and to feel because it’s something that doesn’t need to be taught, but needs to be remembered over and over again. 

Jeongin wraps his arms around the boy. Seungmin attempts to swat his arms away, the way he’s used to, but he thinks it feels quite nice to be hugged. 

He had downed the pain and was begging for the temporary buzz to kick in all while his fingers are clenched on the fabric of Jeongin’s shirt and his tears are leaving a wet spot where his face is pressed against.

There’s a burn in his heart, just under his chest and it’s squeezing so tightly. When he closes his eyes, all he sees is you and he cries a little more. Is this what it felt like to have someone to lose?

Even if he knows you won’t let his feelings get in between your friendship, the unrequitedness of the feelings Seungmin has held for years is dawning on him and it is so, so painful. 

Jeongin shoots you a quick text to meet him tomorrow. 

fifteen.

You wake up to a text from Jeongin which is how you know you’ve truly fucked up now.

You didn’t mean for it to happen, and you feel horrendous. 

You’re honestly not even sure how it happened. What a grief it is that your memory works the way they do and how you don’t remember how it felt to have his face so close to yours. It deprives you of the memory of his eyes and his lips, and they let go of the feeling of his hand in yours while you watched the fireworks. 

The human brain is beautiful, but how dare it cost the sound of his voice and the feeling of his hands cradling your face. 

In hindsight, you know you shouldn’t have run away. But you were afraid. You were afraid it was just a heat of the moment thing and Seungmin didn’t actually want to kiss you. Were you the one that came onto him? Did you initiate the kiss? 

Everything had felt so right before the fear settled in. You’ve been left with questions that were never answered before, all the voices in your head you’ve shut out for so long screaming at you. Was this how it felt to have someone to lose? 

You bury your face in your hands in frustration. Did you ruin years of friendship because you wanted to know how his lips felt like on yours? 

You’re not sure what you’re thinking when you walk towards where Jeongin tells you to meet up, but you do know you’re immediately regretting it. Especially when you see a familiar figure walking towards where you’re standing. 

“I – I have to go.” You blurt out the moment you see him. “I’m sorry. I have to.. I need to be somewhere.” You feel selfish – walking away from him because you’re not ready to hear his rejection.

“Wait, (name). Let me explain myself.”

You don’t want to hear it. You don’t want to hear the words you’d been dreading to hear. 

Backed up by your one-sided feelings, you turn yourself around and your fingers tighten around the sleeves of the jacket you’re wearing, and you shake your head as you try to quicken your pace so you can get out of there as soon as you can.

“I’ve been in love with you since we were eighteen.” 

His sudden confession stops you in your tracks. 

You find it physically impossible to turn around and look at him. Trembling lips are so easy to discern, especially on Seungmin. 

“(Name), please… please look at me.” You will yourself to look at him, and when you brave eye contact, you notice his lips trembling in trial of a smile. But it’s sad, it’s so sad and his lips start to quiver. It’s difficult to ignore the crack in his whispers and the pain in his transparent eyes. 

“I feel like I’m losing you.” The words taste bitter on his tongue. He knows exactly why. 

They’re words he never thought he’d ever utter in his lifetime, and now that he’s saying them, the reality is hitting him much harder. 

“Did I do something wrong? Was it because I tried to kiss you?” Seungmin’s having difficulty speaking, especially with the lump in his throat and the tears threatening to spill from his eyes. He hasn’t cried in such a long time. “I’m sorry. I won’t do it again.” 

He sounds ashamed, and the break in his voice does nothing to disguise his guilt. 

You hate that. You hate that you made Seungmin feel this way over one big misunderstanding. His confession repeats in your head over and over and you feel the buildup of bile in your stomach when you realize you’ve hurt Seungmin.

Your mouth dries. There’s so much you want to tell him, but you find no words escape your throat. It feels like there are fingers being shoved down your throat. 

Before you can push down the nausea, Seungmin breaks eye contact. His heart is beating incredibly fast and he thinks he’s fucked up with you further by confessing his repressed emotions – confessing his feelings he was so practiced in hiding. 

A spell of dizziness sends Seungmin tumbling backwards, heart racing and palms sweating. He looks at you, studying your expression, and the silence feels like it goes on for too long and he thinks he’s made a mistake. 

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything.”

His sorry feels a lot like he’s saying goodbye. 

Seungmin disappears in the blink of an eye.

sixteen.

It’s the first time in a long time that you’re the one blowing up his notifications.

He doesn’t reply to your texts. Granted it’s 3AM and the poor boy is probably asleep.

You’ve been tossing and turning for the past few hours, unable to catch even a wink of sleep with the amount of thoughts racing in your mind. The image of Seungmin, of his red eyes, of his tears, emerges from the night around you. It stubbornly laments, refusing you any form of peace. You deserve it.

Overwhelming sadness stunned you, shadowing over Seungmin’s confession. You don’t allow his words to linger. It’s incredibly unfair to feel hope when Seungmin’s out there feeling his most hopeless. 

You’re about to turn again, forcing your eyes shut when the familiar ringtone of Facetime echoes from your phone. Almost immediately, you’re leaping off your bed, grabbing your phone from the nightstand.

Oh.

It’s Winter.

“Alright, what’s wrong?” You stare at her through the screen of your phone, and it looks like she’s making herself comfortable. She’s seated on her lazy boy chair, blankets bunched up around her shoulders and a mug of something steaming by her side. 

“What?”

“I was gonna walk over to your building, but it’s 3am and I am not about to die just so I can come over and hug you. I’ll do that tomorrow.”

Your heart melts at Winter’s observance. She notices, even if it’s the most minuscule little thing. Winter always notices, and unlike the insincerity pouring from other people when they say they’re only one call away, Winter actually is. She’s one call, one text, one anything away.

“Come on, talk to me.” So you do. You tell her everything from the start. The very start.

You tell her that from the moment you met Seungmin, your mind had started crafting a romance story, even if you didn’t know it yet. He was working part-time at a coffee shop, and you’re not exactly sure how it happened, but you remember the cold sensation of coffee all over you and a promise to make it up to you. When he introduced himself, he shook your hand. 

His hand felt like warm cookies dipped in milk. 

And you tell her ever since then, you spent almost every day getting to know Seungmin and his love for the sunrise and the sunset and how passionate he is about singing but rarely ever does it in front of people and how he is repulsed by physical touch but never really minds when it’s with you. He’s still the same boy you met in that coffee shop, albeit he walks more confidently now. He grew into his features and had a broader back now, but he was still the same boy whose hand you held on the way to his dentist appointment. He was still the Kim Seungmin who smiled at you so brightly when he got his braces removed, and continued to smile at you today.

It’s been a long way since that coffee shop, but he’s remained to be the one true constant in your life. You’re convinced you were always destined to meet him. You reason it’s because you’d be a completely different person now if it wasn’t for him. If you hadn’t met at that coffee shop, you’re convinced Whoever Is Above would’ve found a way for you to meet over and over and over again. 

Everything carries you to him, as if everything that exists were little boats that sailed directly to him — to where he was waiting. To where he’s still waiting.

And then you tell her about the night of the festival. How you almost kissed him, and how you regret every second after for not just pressing your lips on his. You tell her of his confession, and how you love him tenfold, even before you knew what love was. 

Loving Seungmin was the easiest thing you’ve ever had to do. It was falling in love with his eyes and the sound of his laughter and the little things he reserves for you and for your eyes only. 

“Why’d you run away?” It was a valid question. You don’t even know yourself. 

“I guess I was just scared.” You hesitate with your answer, putting your arms around you and staring at nothing in particular. 

“He loves you.” 

“I didn’t know.”

And in hindsight, maybe you should’ve. When you look back for a sign that Seungmin’s loved you all along, you end up finding it interwoven in his teasing. He left so many signs, and you didn’t see a single one. 

There was love in his long, overbearing messages — telling you to eat, asking you about your day, scolding you for worrying him. There was love in his phone calls, in keeping you company in whatever you did because he knows you don’t like the silence very much. The quiet left you alone in your head, and you despised feeling lonely. Love echoed in your laughter and reflected in your smiles even if your jokes weren’t funny. There was love, even in the tiktoks he sent you with the small comment of “us”. It was in the dinners you shared and in the absence of words because he just understood. 

Maybe that’s what love is. Maybe this is what Kim Seungmin’s heart feels like. His love was never made up of grand gestures, it was always in the little things that told you his life is so intertwined with yours.

There was always love all along. 

There still is. 

“He just knows me so well, I thought he could never see me romantically after getting to know all my bad sides.”

“Being known is being loved.” Winter’s words linger in your head as you play a flashback of your years with Seungmin, replaying all the scenes. 

Being known is being loved.

Everything hits you all at once. When he got you that mango shake you loved so much and complained about because it sells out so fast. When you saw the campus dogs and cats that one night, and how he remembered what you said. When he knows you’re deep in thought just because you were chewing at your lips. When he recalls the gift you got a few Christmases ago because it made you so happy. When he lets you borrow the hoodies you mentioned were your favorite. When he memorizes your coffee order by heart.

Love never needed to have the tsunamis and the thunderstorms. Love is just… love. It’s just the quietness, the stillness, the calm. Sometimes, it doesn’t have to feel like a million lightning strikes. It just has to feel like finally letting out that one breath you’ve been holding on for too long.

Being known is being loved. 

“I have to talk to him.”

“I know.”

“I love him.”

“I know.”

“And he loves me.”

“He loves you.”

seventeen.

It isn’t even 8am when you’re pacing back and forth in front of his dorms. 

You know Seungmin usually wakes up early, but you’re unsure of his sleeping patterns as of recently. You haven’t been given the privilege to know, so you text Jeongin. 

Your fingers drum nervously on the side of your thighs, feet shuffling as you stare at their gate, thinking that any moment, he could walk out. 

Last night, you practiced will-induced self conversations over how you were going to approach Seungmin today. You concluded it best not to practice anything you wanted to tell him. You owed him your honesty and a genuine, sincere undertone in your words and apology.

In all honesty, the moment you had arrived within the vicinity of their dorms, you had contemplated whether you should just continue right. Maybe you could just order an iced Americano at a cafe to remind you of Seungmin. Confrontation never came easy to you. But the thought of being an absentee in his life forever scared you and willed you to take the few steps forward towards the entrance of their dorms. 

However, it’s been a good ten minutes since you arrived, and those ten minutes are not the most kind when you’re feeling nervous and about to throw up. It really leaves a lot of room for thinking, and right now it’s thinking that Seungmin wants absolutely nothing to do with you anymore because he thought you were so repulsed by the idea of him loving you and kissing you (even though you felt quite the opposite).

Just when you were about to take a step backward and contemplate the rest of your life, Jeongin walks out of the building pulling a still very sleepy and very disoriented Seungmin behind him.

“Okay, kiss and make up.” Jeongin clasps his hands together before pointing a threatening finger at you. “Don’t mess this up again.” And then he’s on his way back to the inside of their dorm building (peeking through their windows from time to time).

The first thing you discern is his incredibly puffy eyes. From sleeping or crying? You don’t know. And then it’s his pathetic attempt to smile even though he doesn’t feel like it. Seeing him like this, because of you, makes you want to fall on your knees and weep. 

Your eyes trail to the rest of him – his messy hair, his slumped shoulders, his slightly shaking hands. The instinct to hold it is strong, you know it always manages to calm him down. But you don’t. 

“(Name).” His voice sounds thick and heavy, looking at your eyes for a second before looking back down on the pavement. You recognize the pitch of his voice. He was sad and unsure. 

You take a few steps forward, letting out a breath you didn’t know you were holding when he meets your eyes again. It has the same look the day he confessed to you. The same tilting of his head ever so slightly, albeit a little more tired and a little less hopeful. His eyes look like they’re filled with quiet thoughts, looking at you gently even though you had shattered them. 

Seungmin, for the first time in a long time, looks regretful.

“Seungmin, I wanted to… I… I’m sorry.” He simply nods his head, sucking in a shark breath as he thinks this was it. This was the rejection he’d been dreading to hear.

“It’s okay.” He murmurs, your apology threatening to send a new wave of tears in his eyes. “I shouldn’t have said what I said especially when I know you don’t feel the same.”

“Wait, what? No… no. Seungmin, that’s not it.”

There’s a long pause before you speak again. 

“I just… dd you really mean it? What you said yesterday?”

Seungmin cringes at himself, but the red blossoming on his cheeks and the way his features soften when he remembers his words give him away. With a defeated sigh, he runs a hand through his hair.

“Yes.” He admits, an unknown feeling swelling in the pit of his stomach.

That’s all you needed to hear. 

Placing your palms on each side of his face, you pull him towards you in what you thought would be a romantic show of your feelings.

Instead, you underestimate his height and your lips crash into his nose instead. Seungmin stiffens in surprise, at the sudden proximity of your face to his and the accidental kiss you pressed on his nose, and then he laughs. 

Seungmin laughs in the hopeless, clumsy, breathless, exhilarating kind of laugh that sends your cheeks flushing and your heart fluttering because you’ve missed that laugh so much.

He was never sure he acted right that night, that he wasn’t being selfish. But with your palms in his cheeks and your eyes reciprocating the same love all along, he knows he did the right thing. So, with a gentle sigh of relief, he tilts his head and presses his lips against yours. 

Seungmin feels like he can finally breathe again. He kisses you with every love and affection he’s kept hidden for years and years.

You were venturing into the void of the unknown again, kissing your best friend, but it feels safe. There wasn’t that fear of the uncharted. There was only comfort as it always has been with him. The weight of happiness is so overwhelming, and Seungmin thinks there’s nothing more beautiful than kissing you after years of longing.

When the both of you pull away, the feeling of his arms around your waist and his forehead pressed against yours and the fond look on his face sends you toppling over. This was the image of your dreams.

He mirrors the soft smile on your face, hand moving to trace your face and your jaw before placing another kiss on your nose, and your cheek, and the corner of your lips. Your skin tingles at the way his lips and his warm breath tickles you, and your heart skips a bit when you realize you don’t mind feeling this every day for the rest of your life. 

“Can I hear you say it?” He doesn’t need to say it for you to understand.

“I love you.” 

Seungmin feels wholeheartedly content, heart bursting and ears burning red at hearing you utter those three words he’s dreamt about.

“I’ve loved you since you begged me to come with you to your dentist appointment.” 

And then he laughs again, pressing his pointer finger on your forehead with a slight betrayal in his eyes.

“You’re telling me I could’ve kissed you for years now?” He speaks in exaggeration, and you know he’s truly thinking about it.

“You have all the time in the world now.”

“You know what? I like the sound of that.” He moves his hands from your face in favor of wrapping them around your waist – pulling you in the type of hug where you can completely relax against him and melt into his familiar intimacy. The one that’s been there all along, although a little held back. 

You don’t know what’s next. With the vastness and unpredictability of the earth you stand on, you don’t know what follows. The busy morning highway is starting to fill your ears, and the sound of lives starting echos from afar. Somewhere in the distance, someone’s phone rings and there’s a sound of laughing and running from students alike. 

You find that in the chorus of laughter and honking horns and ringtones, the world is telling you that you don’t have to know what’s next. All you need to know is the inhale and exhale and the quietness that Seungmin’s heart offers. 

He’ll be here for a long time, continuing to know and know and know and love you.

eighteen.

8:24am

jeongin: FUCKING FINALLY

minho: ????

chan: language

8:25am

jeongin: (sent a picture)

hyunjin: oh my god????

changbin: our seungmin’s a big boy now

jisung: wdym i wont have to hear seungmin’s mopy ass anymore

chaeryeong: ^^ same with yn :(( but also so happy lol

8:26am

ryujin: EVERYONE CHEERED

jeongin: everyone say thank you jeongin

winter: u mean thank u winter???

hyunjin: felix is crying again

chan: WHY

felix: love is beautiful

changbin: me and who

note. hi hi thank u for making it to the very end of my first ever stray kids fic. i hope you ended up enjoying the ride ^_^ lmk what u thought and who i should write for next!

[odxrilove]

☆ STRAY KIDS REALIZING THEY ARE IN LOVE WITH YOU

pairing: stray kids x fem!reader

genre: fluff, idol!au + non-idol!au , 2.2k

a/n: finally managed to finish this one 🫡

back to masterlist!

☆ BANGCHAN

bangchan realizes it late at night on a tuesday. it's around two or three am when bangchan's phone buzzes, one time, two times and a third time before it stays silent for a few minutes. he's hesitant to pick up the device from its location–which is screen down on the desk– but his thoughts soon get interupted by a fourth buzz. he sighs in relief and smiles, it's you.

less than ten minutes later, you walk in the studio, holding a grocery bag in your right hand. bangchan told you that you didn't need to come and that you should sleep since you had work at eight am that day but you still decided to come over. not everybody would sacrifice a night of sleep to take care of a friend, to make sure he eats and drinks enough.

bangchan falls asleep around five in the morning, on the couch, a blanket draped over his body that you so carefully placed there to keep him warm. you stay up a bit to clean up, throwing away the ramen boxes and organizing all the papers on his desk before you settle next to him and fall asleep less than three minutes after.

when he wakes up that morning, you're a gone but a cup of coffee and a note await him. you remind him to rest and bangchan can't help but blush at the little heart next to your name. you're a great friend but that day, he hopes for you to be more than friends.

☆ LEE KNOW

it was unexpected for him, it came out of nowhere and at once. the boys had invited you to go on a short trip to a cabin with them and you had happily agreed, organizing and helping chan with preparing everything. when the two cars parked in front of your apartment, you immediately hopped into the car with minho, sliding in next to him and giving him a smile so big he could tell how joyful you were. from the moment you exited the city, banter and laughter filled the car. it was a chilly but sunny afternoon and having you by his side, so openly carefree, made him all the more content. lee know wasn’t really listening to the conversation, mainly admiring you, but suddenly something drags him out of his reverie. you’re playfully arguing with han and apparently you’re talking about lee know’s cats. the boy’s too peaceful to interrupt the two of you so he listens. he can’t help but grin when you describe his three cats, using your fingers to show there are three and naming them while han watches, baffled. it’s not anything extraordinary but the way you gush about them, having taken the time to learn their names and be able to recognize them, makes lee know blush. for the rest of the trip, the dancer is shyly watching you out of the corner of his eye, heart beating fast in his chest.

☆ CHANGBIN

it’s a normal cloudy day, the wind making the fallen leaves twirl in the air, but you’re not too bothered by it, headphones on and music blasting in your ears. it was changbin’s idea to meet at the gym after his normal practice schedule, so that he could finally help you out while you stepped inside a gym for the first time in your life. you don’t think you have ever been more nervous for this, feeling as if everyone had their eyes fixed on your every movement. when you almost wanted to called it quits and run out of there, changbin entered the luxe room, waving to other jacked guys as he walked past them towards you. he was quick to grin at you, seeing your wary expression and patted your head. changbin knows you hate the gym and everything that could resemble a sport so he’s quick to reassure you, to tell you that you’re doing a good job and that he knows you can do it, making your already red face heat up even more. he shrugs off your stares as silent screams of distress, not wanting to get his hopes up and convince himself that you ogle his arms only because he’s showing you the right movement and not because his biceps are on full display. when the short but intense gym session is over and you’re all sweaty and aching all over, you let your head fall against his chest as you sit still on one of the benches. changbin’s heart beats loudly in his chest and he hopes you can’t hear it. he lets you take a two minute nap there, way too mesmerized by your sleeping figure to even dare wake you up, already feeling guilt creeping up at the thought of going to the gym daily with you, hands linked and shared kisses.

☆ HYUNJIN

hyunjin’s tired, legs feeling like jelly and muscles aching all over. he gulps down the plastic water bottle, sweat dripping down his temples and staining the collar of his tank top. his back is pressed against the floor-to-ceiling mirror and the fabric of his top sticks to his skin. the clock is slowly ticking, his heavy breathing echoing off the walls. when the door to the practice room opens, he doesn’t need to see to know who it is, preferring to keep his head low. your perfume fills the room and hyunjin regains his senses, eyes slowly blinking open to see you staring at him with a stern expression. he knows you don’t like it when he gets home late– he likes to tell himself you only worry about his whereabouts when it’s his turn to do the dishes. you squat down next to him, the back of your hand touching his burning forehead. you loudly scowl at him and he only chuckles tiredly in return, he’s way too out of it to notice the way your stare softens and your lips turn into a worrying pout before you’re back to your normal state. he lets you bring him home to your shared apartment, nodding along to whatever you’re saying, chewing him out for being so careless. the warmth of your apartment hits him like a truck and he grins, as if high. you continue to drag him with you, making sure he doesn’t bump into anything as you slowly help him take off his shoes. you tuck him in, starry eyes looking for any sign of discomfort on his face. he knows you only want what's best for him, that you genuinely care and worry about him. and that thought alone is enough for him to want to give you his full heart, silently calling after you as you close his bedroom door behind you. maybe next time you would hear his pleas, next time when he doesn’t have a burning fever.

☆ JISUNG

han realizes he loves you more than a simple friend during a hangout. it’s a friday evening and your friends’ weekly ‘movie date’. normally, han’s one of the happiest and loudest people during those few hours, but this time he’s quieter, a little isolated. you’re not the only one that noticed but he brushed it off as being tired, effectively but suspiciously convincing the others. you realize pretty fast it’s not because he’s tired when you notice his bouncing knee and fidgety fingers. han could feel you staring, teeth gnawing on the straw of his sugar-filled drink. but then he looks down at the floor, trying to avoid the incoming headache, and he can feel the lack of eyes on him. he only realizes you’re next to him when your hand touches his, your fingers coming to squeeze and entangle with his on your lap, thumb rubbing circles on his skin. you send him a reassuring smile, one full of comfort and love, and suddenly jisung feels warm. it’s a weird feeling but not unpleasant and when you lay your head on his shoulder and start to hum one of his favorite songs, he knows that the butterflies in his stomach are going to be difficult to get rid of.

☆ FELIX

he realizes it when he's baking with you. in the middle of making some cookies, he suddenly sneezes and sends flour flying everywhere. on your face, clothes and kitchen counters and walls. the flour hangs in the air for a few seconds before it drops down to the floor in a very slow and dramatic way. there's an awkward silence for a few seconds and he thinks you are going to scold him or be pissed at him for making a mess but instead, you throw your head back and laugh.

you laugh so hard it echoes through the room as you clutch your stomach, gripping onto the counter tightly as you try to stand up straight. felix is baffled and that's when you take action, grabbing a handful of the white powder and throwing it directly on him before running around the counter, grabbing another handful of flour to defend yourself.

he watches in awe as you slightly but excitedly jump up and down and prepare yourself for his attack. a blush creeps up on his cheeks and his heart beats in his chest like it's on fire. that's when he knows he loves you. he realizes it when you are covered in flour but smilling nonetheless. in that moment, felix knows that he fell deeply and inevitably in love with you.

☆ SEUNGMIN

seungmin sighs again, for the sixth time since you forced your way into his room ten minutes prior. you continue to ignore him as he spins on his desk chair, watching you flip through his old middle school photobook from a few feet away. you’re laying down comfortably on your stomach on his bed, feet linked together and swinging in the air as you let out breathy giggles every few seconds. normally, seungmin would already have tried to rip the photobook from your arms, but you had been particularly nice to him the day prior– bringing him the extra brownies felix helped you make– so he thinks that letting you get your way for an hour or two won’t hurt his ego too much. your phone buzzes from his bedside table but you don’t move to grab it, leaving the boy curious. it buzzes again and when you do grab it this time, you put it down a second later, now on mute. seungmin stares at you, a puzzled look on his face before you finally turn to him, probing him to ask why you didn’t reply. you only give him a smile, one so sweet that his heart skips a beat. you voice is soft, words rolling off your tongue. “i prefer to be with you, the others can wait.” suddenly seungmin’s head is spinning, at a loss for words. he doesn’t know what’s happening to him, why he’s suddenly so reactive to every detail. it’s a weird feeling, really, but he lets himself fall into it, the feeling of being loved and loving so new and daring that he can’t get enough of it.

☆ JEONGIN

jeongin isn’t too sure why he’s even there, silently watching from his seat on the couch as you’re running around their dorm, going back and forth between the bathroom, the hallway and the bedroom your bag is in. all his friends are laughing and joking around, poking fun at you and your panicked and disheveled appearance. you’re stressing, smiling nervously when bangchan asks you if you’re ready. jeongin has never seen you so giddy but so stressed at the same time, noticing how you’re picking at your nails and playing with the strap of your bag. you’re pretty too, he thinks. a scowl takes over his face, he never really realized how pretty you were, usually the thought of finding you attractive never even entered his mind. he gets up and walks over to you, waiting for you to notice him. in your nervous state you turn towards him, colored lips in a tight line. he takes a step forward and his hand hovers over the side of your face until you nod, allowing him to brush the few strands of hair out of your face. he pushes them behind your ears, softly patting your head and massaging your temples. you instantly relax and he can’t help but smile. when you’re out the door, with chan following behind you, car keys in hand, jeongin feels his face heat up, butterflies flying free in his stomach. he doesn’t really register what his friends say, replaying the image of you waving them goodbye with the prettiest smile he’s ever seen. the boy lets himself drown in the cushions of the couch, sighing and an upcoming headache already on its way. if only he had complimented you then, maybe you would have realized his words were laced with newly discovered love and only maybe then you wouldn’t have walked out the door, yelling at your older brother to hurry up so you wouldn’t be late to your date.

taglist: @0x1lovebot @fairybinie @blaqpinksthetic @odetoyeonjun @pockyandme @soobin-chois @lolalee24 @soobisms @junityy @kaimal @laylasbunbunny @jaeyunverse @enhacolor @honglynights @starry-mins @bibinnieposts @raevyng @yoonzin0 @pointlessapple @yyx2 @yeokill

please do not copy, steal or repost any of my work. all content belongs to @odxrilove

[rachalixie]

a/n: a eulogy to my beloved braced seungmin. lost too soon.

he enters the front door with a spring in his step, whistling lightly as he locks the door behind him and collapses onto the couch next to you.

“good day?” you ask, your mood immediately improving, absorbing his infectious positive energy. he hums in response, snuggling into your side with a happy sigh.

“can we have curry for dinner?” he asks, voice a little muffled from the way he has his face pressed into your hoodie.

“curry? you can’t have curry, silly. your braces, remember?” you chide, flicking his exposed nose gently with your finger. he scrunches up his face and ducks away, leaning down to hide his face into your lap instead.

“let’s make an exception. please?”

even without his puppy dog eyes looking up at you, you can’t deny him anything. so, you place an order for curry while he dozes on your lap, hand scratching at his scalp whenever you felt the urge.

you let him convince you to eat on the couch today, saying just this once even though you both know this isn’t the first and last time you’ll cave to this particular demand. it’s worth it when he takes his first bite and bounces a little in place, hiding his pleased face with his hand as he chews.

you look at him with what you’re sure is a ridiculous amount of fondness, until you notice a peek of white through his fingers. you gasp, pulling his hand away and he isn’t fast enough to hide his wide smile before you take in his teeth. his teeth, cleared of the braces he’s had since you met him years ago.

“seungmin?” you cry, reaching to his face to pull his lips apart. it’s a little gross, but you can’t bother to care about that right now. “your braces are gone?”

“surprise?” he says, relaxing his muscles as he lets himself smile widely. you feel a pang of loss at the metal which you’ve found yourself in love with along with the rest of him, but you shake it off when his smile turns a bit nervous.

“you’re so beautiful,” you croon, taking his cheek in your hand and buzzing when he nuzzled into it. “my pretty seungminnie.”

—

soft hours

[skz-bee123]

You catch them staring at you

Stray Kids reaction

Word count: 2.2k

Bang Chan

He genuinely thinks you’re just so beautiful no matter what you do. It was actually quite common to catch him staring at you. Whether you’re getting ready to go out with your friends, or choosing to have a lazy day at home, or even pulling your hair out with stress because of that stupid thing that you procrastinated in doing. Chan thinks you’re beautiful. 

It just amazes him the way you do things. Every little thing catches his attention because it’s just so you. And he loves you. A lot. 

You both lead very busy lives, albeit yours was probably not as busy as his, and there wasn’t much time that you guys got to spend together. So when that time did come around, it was spent basking in each other. 

Chan would be working on his music while you worked on something of your own. When inspiration just wasn’t hitting him and he knew he needed to catch a break, Chan would stare at you. 

Seeing the concentration on your face. The way you bit your lip or your brows furrowed because something just wasn’t right, made his heart full. 

You weren’t even aware just how beautiful you were to him and he honestly just couldn’t help but stare. The vulnerable moments are what made him fall more in love with you. 

You would always turn your face and catch him looking at you, a smile instantly breaking out on your face, no matter what emotions you were feeling previously.

Then you would always, always ask him, “would you like my opinion?” 

Despite the fact that you knew little to nothing about music, you always wanted to help him out. He knew you had other important things to worry about but the fact that you still wanted to help him out would tug at his heart strings. 

 “Yeah, do you mind?” Chan would ask. 

“Not at all.” You would put aside whatever you were going and move closer to Chan as he gently places the headphones on you. He watches you the entire time, looking for those little reactions you make to the art that he was producing. 

It was always then and there that he would think to himself that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with you. 

Lee Minho

When you caught him first looking at you, you thought it was because you had something on your face. 

“N-”

“Mi-”

“Min?”

Minho finally breaks out of the trance he was in and blinks a couple times, “yeah?”

“Do I have something on my face?”

At your questions Minho just looks confused, “your face?”

You nod your head, “yeah, you were staring at me, I just assumed I had something on my face.” 

“He’s staring at you cause he thinks you’re pretty Y/n.” Hyunjin says before running away once seeing the look on Minho’s face.  

“Do you think so?” You ask, a blush coating your cheeks. 

“I mean, I guess so.” 

“Thank you, I think you’re pretty too.” 

“Uh well, of course I am, I mean look at this face.” Despite the confidence that was dripping from his tone of voice, the red on his ears gave him away. 

“You’re adorable.” You say as you reach over to pinch his cheek. Minho gently swats your hand away and playfully scoffs. 

“Yeah, yeah. So are you gonna tell me about that girl from work?”

This seems to have effectively distracted you as you go into detail about what had happened today at work. 

Minho makes eye contact with Hyunjin who mouths ‘whipped’. Choosing to ignore Hyunjin, Minho rolls his eyes and focuses back on you. 

Yeah okay, maybe he was whipped. But there was no way in hell you were ever gonna find that out. 

Seo Changbin 

“I don’t think this is how it should work,” you mumble to yourself. “Come on Y/n, think.” 

And idea pops into your head which causes you to squirm in your seat with excitement, quickly trying down the words in your brain before they escape you. 

With a satisfied smile on your face, you lean back in your chair and stretch. You close your laptop before turning to Changbin, who was working on his music beside you. 

Seeing him already looking at you, causes a surprised look on your face. Changbin notices that you had caught him looking and throws you an exaggerated aegyo. 

“Oh my gosh,” you giggle at Changbin. 

“Did you get your work done?” Changbin asks after you settle down. 

“Yeah, it’s finally all done.” 

“Good work baby.” 

“Well I think I deserve a reward.” 

“A reward?” Changbin asks with a raised brow. 

You nod your head at him with a massive smile on your face. 

“And what is it you would like for your reward?” 

You pretend to think for a moment, “hmm, maybe a kiss?” 

“A kiss?”

“Yup, I want a kiss.” 

“Well that can definitely be arranged.” Changbin says as he pulls you closer. 

Hwang Hyunjin 

You were going out with some of your friends and putting on some makeup. Hyunjin had come into your room, talking to you about your day. He sat on your bed while you were at your vanity. 

Hearing Hyunjin stop speaking, you shoot him a quick glance in the mirror. 

“Baby? I’m listening, what happened next?” You say. 

You continue on with your makeup, finishing up the final touches. 

“Hyun?” You turn around once you’ve finished, your boyfriend still not saying anything. You catch him staring at you, his mouth slightly open. 

“Does it look back?” 

That seems to snap him out of the trance he was in. 

“Bad?” Hyunjin starts, “no way. Baby you look gorgeous. How in the world did I manage to grab you?” 

You laugh as you walk up to Hyunjin, sitting down next to him. 

“I think the question should be, how in the world did I manage to grab you?” You say. 

“I think I might know why.” 

“Oh yeah?” 

“Yeah, I mean pretty people always end up together, that’s just the way it works.”

“Is that right now?” 

Hyunjin looks at you with a dead serious look on his face, “of course, didn’t you know? I’m pretty and you are absolutely drop dead beautiful, of course we were supposed to be together.” 

“Ahh okay, I think I’m staring to understand now.”

“Good. But you do know what that means right?”

You look at Hyunjin confused, “no?”

“It means that you can never leave me. Seeing as we are the prettiest people in this entire world, we have to stick together. Nobody will understand us. So by default, you’re never allowed to leave.”

“Never?”

“Never, ever.”

You plant a kiss on Hyunjin’s lips, “well I guess you’re stuck with me for all of eternity. 

“I suppose I can live with that.” 

Han Jisung 

He had been listening to you talk about all the exciting things you had coming up and the sparkle in your eyes just caught him off guard. you just look so beautiful and didn’t even realise it. 

So you honestly can’t blame him for staring. In fact, he didn’t even realise he was. 

It was in these moments where Jisung understood you a little better. Remembering those things you say and storing it in the back of his mind for when they come up at a later date. 

At this point in your relationship it was second nature. Despite being labelled as someone who never took anything seriously, when it came to you, you undoubtedly had his full attention. His gaze would be stuck on your face and he would capture ever word that came out of your mouth. 

Which leads to where you are now. 

“You okay Sungie?” 

Jisung snaps out of the daze he was in, “yeah I’m fine.”

“I wasn’t talking too much?” you ask him. “You were staring at me pretty intensely.” 

Jisung grabs your hand and rubs it with his thumb, a smile on his face. “I was just paying attention to you. And you don’t talk too much, I love listening to your voice anyway. So keep telling me about your day.” 

“Are you sure?”

Seeing that you were still a bit hesitant, Jisung leans forward and places a kiss on your lips, “of course baby. Tell me everything.” 

And he genuinely meant it. Sometimes Jisung’s social battery just ran out, you understood that. You knew that sometimes Jisung needed someone to take control so that he could just be. And if that meant rambling to him about anything and everything, you would. 

Lee Felix

You both were like rays of sunshine, the whole of Stray Kids adored you both. Despite the fact that Felix sometimes got caught up with you and this in return made him forget about the things he was doing, the guys could do nothing but smile. You both were adorable, through and through. 

“Hum,” you gently grab Felix’s hand.

“Yeah?” Felix smiles at you. 

“Channie has ben trying to talk to you for the past 5 minutes.” 

Felix’s eyes widen as he turns to the rest of the guys who were watching the both of you, “I’m sorry. I was just-”

“Staring at Y/n, it’s okay.” Chan cuts him off.

“Yeah you were Lixie, did you need anything?” You ask him.

Felix just shakes his head, “no, no. I was just, I don’t know, I just thought you were really pretty.” 

“Thank you,” you smile at your boyfriend. “I also think you’re very pretty.” 

A big goofy smile forms on Felix’s face at your words. 

“Really?” Felix asks. 

“Yup! I think you’re very, very pretty.” 

Felix tackles you into a hug, the force making you both fall to the ground. Felix gently cradles your head, so that it doesn’t hit the floor. 

“I love you.” Felix whispers. 

“I love you too.” You reach a hand up to push some hair off his face. 

Suddenly Felix’s weight is taken off you as Felix is lifted up with a yelp. You see Jisung, Hyunjin, Seungmin and Jeongin softly teasing Felix who only whines. 

“Here,” Chan says with a hand out for you to take, which you do. 

Chan pulls you to your feet and you thank him. 

“No worries.” 

“You’re both perfect for each other.” Changbin comes and sits beside you, while Chan sits on the other side. Minho coming and sitting in front of you. 

“You really think so?” You ask. 

“Oh yeah definitely,” Minho says this time. “You don’t know how long we have been waiting for the two of you to get together.” 

“You both seem very happy,” Chan says. 

“We are.” You smile s you look at Felix, who is now being tickled by Jisung and Hyunjin. 

Kim Seungmin

He had no shame. 

If you caught him looking, then he would just admit straight to it. He wasn’t one to beat around the busy. So when you caught him staring at you, he would straight up tell you why. 

If you had food on your face, he would say so. 

“Minnie? Why are you staring at me?”

“Y/n turn your face towards me.” 

You do as he says and Seungmin reaches a hand out to wipe your face. 

“Thanks.” 

Seungmin playfully scowls at you, “You’re like a child.” 

“Shut up.” You gently hit him. 

“See a child.”

Or if your makeup was a bit smudged. 

“Y/n I think your mascara has smudged a bit.” 

“Oh gosh really?” 

“Yeah.”

You reach into your bag and pull out your carry on makeup kit. Grabbing out the small portable mirror you see that you do indeed have some of your mascara smudged. 

“Thanks Minnie.” 

“It’s alright.” 

Or if he just straight up thought you were pretty. 

“Hey Y/n.” 

You hum as you turn to look at Seungmin who was already staring at you. 

“I think you look really pretty today.” 

“Really?” 

“Yeah.” 

You smile at Seungmin, “thank you.” 

Seungmin just shrugs his shoulder at you, “I was only speaking the truth.” 

Yang Jeongin

You were both across the room from each other. Jeongin was writing some lyrics over by the window and you were sitting on the couch working on some stuff that you needed to do. 

You hadn’t even realised he was staring at you until you stretched to take a break. Feeling a gaze on you, you look over to see Jeongin staring at you. 

The gentle smile that forms on your face causes one to form on Jeongin’s face as well. You push your laptop to the side and stand up, making your way over to Jeongin. You sit down between his legs, with your back to his chest. 

“Is the writing going okay?” You ask him as you settle down. 

Jeongin wraps his arms around your waist and snuggles into your neck. He lays a gentle kiss there. 

“It’s certainly going in some direction, is that direction good? I don’t know.” 

You gently laugh at him before grabbing the notepad he had with the already written down lyrics. 

“Do you mind if I have a look? And besides, two brains are always better than one.” 

“That is true, and no I don’t mind.” Jeongin pauses for a moment before speaking again. “Hey Y/n?”

You just hum in response while reading through what he had written down. 

“I love you.” 

“I love you too.” You turn your head back to give Jeongin a kiss. “Okay now let’s get to writing these lyrics.” 

Jeongin settles his head on your shoulder, “let’s get to it then.” 

[tyunphoria]

🌪️ skz finding your old stan tweet of them — maknae line.

im bored and i did this while cramming for exams so expect it to be ass🦧

INCLUDES: kinda crack tbh, a teenee bit suggestive w han and i.n. prolly if u squint, cursing

- - - - - -

[yxngbxkkie]

mornings with seungmin ✨

i absolutely love this so much. i believe it's the perfect mixture of cute and spicy. well, a bit of spice 😅 i hope you guys enjoy! 💖

feedback is appreciated 🥰

~

Seungmin wakes up before you, and a smile comes to his face instantly. He rolls onto his back, and you move with him, sleeping soundly on his chest. His right arm hooks around your back, gliding his fingertips along your bare skin.

He gently rubs his face with his free hand before noting the wedding ring on his finger. "I can't believe you're forever mine," he whispers, mainly to himself.

You let out a cute little groan and nuzzle your face into his neck. Seungmin chuckles quietly and reaches for his phone. He takes a quick picture of you just before someone knocks on the door to your hotel room.

"Shit," he curses and untangles himself from your grasp. He places a kiss on your forehead before sliding his boxers on. The knocking continues, causing him to grumble under his breath. "Coming."

After walking over to the door, he cracks it open. An older woman stands on the other side of the door with a rolling cart. "Good Morning. I apologize if now's not a good time. My manager told me you guys got married yesterday so we brought the two of you a complimentary breakfast," she explains.

Seungmin smiles at the kind woman and holds up a finger. "Give me one second to put a robe on," he says embarrassingly. She nods and he gently shuts the door.

He grabs the nearest robe, quickly putting it on and tying the front. His gaze moves back towards the king-sized bed, noticing that you're still sleeping soundly. He returns to the door, opening it all the way for her to come in.

"She's still sleeping," he mentions to her, and she nods her head again.

"I'll just leave it here for you two. Congratulations again," she bows her head, and Seungmin does the same. He thanks her as she leaves the room.

Seungmin crawls onto the bed, caging you in his arms as he hovers over you. "Sweetheart," he whispers, trailing his lips along your jaw. "They brought free breakfast."

You groan in response, pushing his face away from you. He laughs at your reaction and places another kiss on your cheek. "Stop," you whine, shoving your face into the pillow.

"Who knew my wife would be so grumpy in the mornings," Seungmin jokes, playfully rolling his eyes.

"We were engaged for three years, Minnie. You know how I am in the morning," you clarify, keeping your eyes closed.

Seungmin shifts so he can lay down beside you and grabs a hold of your left hand. Your eyes slowly flutter open, meeting your husband's gaze. His thumb fiddles with the wedding ring on your finger before lacing your fingers together.

"Good morning, baby," you giggle, squeezing his hand gently.

"Good morning, sweetheart," Seungmin smiles at you, leaning forward to kiss your forehead.

Your heart flutters in your chest as the memories of yesterday play in your mind. "I can't believe we're married," you mention with a smile, slowly sitting up.

Seungmin's eyes glance to your chest as the duvet falls to your lap. "I can die a happy man now that I get to wake up to you every day," he tells you, bringing his free hand to the valley of your breasts.

A shiver runs down your spine as Seungmin begins to press kisses on your chest. "I love you so much," he whispers against your skin.

Your hands grab a hold of his face before kissing his lips. "I love you. Now and forever."

~

tagging: @thewxntersoldier @reddesert-healourblues @spacegirlstuff

[lovestaysblogs]

sooo cute 🥹💗

The Deal

Summary: She was officially failing in life and most importantly in university! With her grades hanging of the edge of a thread and tutors rejecting her left and right her only option is to make a deal with the devil a.k.a Kim Seungmin.A deal should always be fair. Your grades in exchange for Kim Seungmin's dream girl. Simple?...Right?!

Word Count: 35k

Slight enemies to lovers, idiots to lovers, slow burn, angst, fluff.

No warnings, some foul language.

AN: Finally it's here! Tumblr won't let me post it in one post, so I am forced to divide into two parts. Would you be interested in SKZ x Greek Mythology theme? Hope you enjoy!!!

Part 2

@lethallyprotected

    "Your tutor requested to be released from his duties"

"Again?!" You cried out, frustrated beyond belief. You started sweating in your seat. That was my 6th one! You thought, running your hands through your hair messing up the soft curls you had tried to make 2 hours or so ago. "Mr Marlow isn't there anything that I can do? Can't I do some extra credit?" You pleaded the professor that stood across you, desperation clear on your face.

   Mr. Marlow was slumped also in defeat in his plush rolling chair. His office was always the epitome of an organized chaos. Heavy books sat on top of his mahogany desk, some opened, some closed. Papers littered the surface, some with angry red notes accompanying them and some others filled with highlighted colors as to remind him of an extra important issue. 

      You always felt grateful that you had been assigned to Mr. Marlow, he may oddly resemble the white rabbit in the Alice in wonderland film personality wise, but he had a good heart and God bless him, he was so patient with you. He was the first teacher to show you such compassion and empathy and to push you to pursue more of your studies. He was an excellent teacher. And he wasn't obligated to sit and listen to you whine about your problems, but he was sitting there and trying to work out a solution with you. With great hesitation he opened his mouth "Maybe if you approached a professional?"

    You signed. "That would be way over my budget" you muttered regretfully. That would mean double the hours only to be left with crumbs. And you couldn't possibly ask your father of this.

     You signed once again and stood up with your bag on your shoulder ready to leave, slightly bowing to the old man before you. He had way more grey hair in the midst of his hair and beard since you had first met him you noticed. You bet that you were responsible for a good chuck of it. " Thank you regardless Mr Marlow. I will try to work it out" You made your way to the door with heavy steps before heading a rushed "Wait!" 

    He stood hurriedly from his chair and walked around the desk towards you, or more specifically towards to the large bookcase that covered his whole wall behind you, and started shuffling through more papers. You watched him, waiting for an explanation to his sudden manic frenzy. When he finally found what he had been searching for, he let out a yelp and turned towards you. "I shouldn't be doing this. I mean- It's not against the rules, but they wouldn't be pleased- Anyway! Y/N-"

    "Is this the part where you tell me you are my father and try to convince me to come to the dark side, professor? Because if it has cookies, let me tell you, I am already sold" you joked.

    Mr Marlow chuckled under his breath but moved on quickly. " This list that contains the names of the top students of our university. They may be of help to you. Try and persuade someone to help you, dear"he said grabbing a pen and scribbling down a note before giving you the piece of paper. A brief look in his smiling eyes and an other to the piece of paper with messy familiar swirlings on it and you were melting.

    "Thank you, Mr Marl" you smiled gracefully at him and bowed, deeper than last time, before taking the final step outside of his office.

 Now let the games begin.

 "So let me get this straight.. you will stalk the top three geniuses of the school to convince them to save your sorry ass from failing?" Yuqi provided, rather unhelpfully, in your humble opinion as she continued to stuff her face with her banana yogurt.

  "I am not stalking! I am watching them with an interest" you corrected her sternly. You were no stalker. You were a girl with purpose.

   "Sounds like stalking to me, but whatever floats your boat" she ironically replied. "Who will be your first target?" She said glancing at the instagram page you were snooping through. "Namjoon?"

    "I mean he is a literal genius. Who would be better to teach me than him?" You wondered out loud, fingers continuously scrolling down his page. He seemed nice, a little on the dorky side and smart. Not to mention handsome. "Well wish me luck" you said as you closed your phone and stood up.

     "You are going right now?" She asked, shocked at your standing figure.

     "Well, the semester isn't going to wait for me" you cackled and made your way to the table Kim Namjoon sat.

    It was not your first choice to approach him like this, but he always seemed to be running around doing this and that, which left lunch as the only safe option that didn't made you into a creep (in comparison to approaching him in a bar setting as you had contemplated). But now that you were approaching the group you were nervous, not only you had to ask a very attractive and smart stranger to tutor your failing ass, but you had to-partly- do it in front of his equally attractive friends.

     You heard a lively laugh booming from the table, a young man with a heart shaped smile was the source. You scanned them quickly, going through shades and shades of hair colors, before settling on the ash brown color that you wanted to speak to.

     "Kim Namjoon?" You asked, tone uncertain. Even though you said one name, seven pair of eyes turned to you. Every one more attractive than the next, you though dreamily. You briefly locked gaze with a short male with honey coloured hair and equally honeyed smile before an answer from your desired target caught your attention. "That would be me" a low voice answered you.

     You turned your gaze to the tall male. Board shoulder that enhanced his already tall frame, even thought his oversized tee and lose pants made it difficult to pinpoint, you were sure he was well built. Sand coloured hair, neatly cut, complimented his olive complexion awfully well. Small face, even smaller than yours even though you wouldn't admit it, straight nose and upon inspecting his smile a pair of adorable dimples. Yep, that was Kim Namjoon.

     "Can I talk to you for a minute?" You asked, politely, arms crossed behind you, making sure you were using your customer service smile.

      He looked at you, obviously not recognizing you and then back to his friends that wore wolfish smiles and eagerly nodded at him. "Uhhh..Sure" he replied, not yet sure of your intentions.

      "Come on" you said, leading him away from his friend's prying ears. You ended up a few meters away, standing a bit awkwardly facing each other. You craned your neck to make eye contact with him and decided to bite the bullet. "I know that this" you made a notion between the two of you "is random, but I have a big favor to ask" you started and lowered your gaze, not being able to look up now, you played with your fingers out of nerves. "Umm I know you are really busy, but I need help." You said, finding courage to look him in the eyes. " Truth is... I am failing in math and physics and you are the only one that can help me. I heard you are a genius and I thought that learning from the best is the best strategy." 

      Okay.. that could have gone better,you thought. But flattery and a pretty female face seemed to make him flustered... hopefully enough to agree. He opened and closed his mouth several times, hands raising to stroke his neck in shame and in embarrassment at your rough compliments. "Ohh...Umm.. I don't really know if I am the one that can help you. I am pretty busy-" he started before you cut in.

      "So am I! And I really need this! I wouldn't have asked you otherwise! You won't have to work hard! Just- just when I don't get something maybe you could explain it to me? Please?" You clutched your hands together in front of you, almost giving him puppy eyes. You were desperate and it showed. 

      "I-I don't know if I will be a good teacher but..." He looked uncertain and confused but an easygoing smile made its way onto his face "Sure! If I can help, I guess" he chuckled as he shifted his weight from one foot to another.

      "Thank you! Thank you Namjoon!" You said, particularly jumping up and down from joy. You couldn't believe it! It was so easy! You were going to make it!

You weren't going to make it.

You were doomed.

Namjoon was a sweetheart and a genius. And how did geniuses speak and explain? Apparently in a language you didn't understand or comprehend.

The gentle giant was true to his word and after you exchanged numbers you started going over the basics. For the record it was difficult to meet up.. Apparently everyone wants a genius in their project, so poor Namjoon was constantly running all around the place trying to fit it all to his hectic schedule. So you took it in a fast pace, trying to absorb as much info as you could and while Namjoon tried to help you (he truly did!) that only ended with frustrated signs and desperate stomps from you. Every word he spoke was like...like it was in an other language! You hit the first wall at physics and that wall extended into the math area and grew into a bigger and bigger wall and ended up like the Great Wall of China, separating your weak academic ass from the man who had an IQ of 148. 

    Sorrowfully you said your last goodbye at Namjoon, who in turn hugged you like the child he now thought you were and told you to call him whatever you needed.

    You signed.. it was already September! How would you be able to lift your grades by February? You couldn't give up though! Your part scholarship depended on it! So you pulled out the now crumbled paper and traced your finger over the second name. 

Kim Hong Joong.

You knew of him and his rowdy crew. Plus a close friend of his, Wooyoung, worked with you. You were on good terms with him, fortunately. He was way too cute for a guy in college you though, easy to talk to and with a breathy laugh, similar to those witchy cartoon characters, you like it though...not only it was contagious, but unique too. You would have to talk to him when you went to the coffee shop later, you decided. For now you slumped on your desk, ready for an exciting lesson on philosophy.

 After a good 3 hours of Aristotle's teaching you made your way to the cafeteria. Yuqi texted you a little while back, saying that her lesson ended early and was with Yuna to the cafeteria. You stood up shrugging on your thrifted university jacket and making your way through the crowd. The weather was perfect this time of the year, still hot enough from the summer heat with a light breeze blowing just enough to refresh you. The whole campus was still green and full of life, causing students to hang around the lawn. While you crossed the campus you catch a glimpse of the mess that consisted of Han Jisung. The short brunette was a ball of energy, that completely exhausted you while on the clock together, but his charm was incomparable. You still couldn't believe it that he had broken a dozen of cups and the manager just left him off the hook. You paused your walking to greet the boy.

   "Y/N! Hi!" He exclaimed, pulling you for a side hug. You smiled at him, greeting politely his friends as well. The brunette boy only stared at you, a single nod your only greeting while the taller of the two, a pretty boy with foxy eyes gave you an adorable dimpled smile, which you returned.

   " Hi! I haven't seen you almost a week." You replied, his absence from work painfully obvious. Thankfully you, at least, had Wooyoung, the funny man making the hours pass easily.

    "Oh yeah! I had to take some days off cause boss didn't match with my uni schedule. The semester barely begun and my professors gave us 3 new projects! To see if we lost our talent over the summer. Who says that?" He cried dramatically, but you were no better than him.

    "I know right?! Math has been beating my ass too" you whined, hosting your bag higher up your shoulder. You exchanged a look that only students who were failing could understand.

     "I get you. Not my best subject as well" he agreed as well.

     You smiled sympathetically and shook your head. "Anyway I got to run! Yuqi and Yuna are waiting for me! See you later Sung" you saluted, threw a last polite smile to your listeners and took the path to the cafeteria. You heard muffled whispers behind you, but you didn't pay much attention as you put your headphones on.

     Soon you were entering the cafeteria through the double glass doors, that overlooked a good chunk of the campus yard. You looked at the crowd trying to find the pair and just as you spotted a bright orange hair color in a space bun up do in the crowd, your front made contact with something solid causing you both to fall down.

     "Ouff!" A yelp escaped you as soon as you made contact with the floor under you. Ouch! You rubbed your aching bum as you checked yourself. Other than your headphones,that fell off (those darned wireless buds! I love you and hate you at the same time!) you were good to go. You lifted your head to see a petit girl, in a similar position to yours, only clutching her pink clad phone in her hands and letting a relieved sign. She lifted her head and-

     "I am so sorry!"

     "I am sorry!" 

   You both blurted at the same time, looked each other and burst laughing. You standed up, extending a hand to the dark haired beauty in front of you. "Sorry! I wasn't watching were I was going. You good?" you apologized as you pulled her up, inspecting her. Her short black skirt let you know that her thin legs were injury free, but you asked nevertheless, making sure.

   She smiled at you and showed her phone. "Nah I am good, only worried about my phone. Don't worry about it! I shouldn't have stood in the middle" she said as she dusted herself off.       

     "I am Lee Soojin" she said, extending her hand. She had glossy black locks framing her doll like face, which consisted of huge onyx eyes, a tiny nose and a set of full lips.Although she was the same height as you, she was thinner, almost fragile looking. She was dressed to the nines, a black skirt, a white fluffy top and loafers with a slight heel. She looked like a dream. Especially in comparison to you who wore flared jeans with a black tee, your outfit completing a pair of double soled black converse and your loyal thrifted university jacket. 

   "L/N Y/N" you said, shaking her hand.

   "I know.Sort of" she laughed a bit awkward in response to your raised brows. She knew you? "I often come by the coffee shop you work in. You get my coffee just right"

   Ohh."Vanilla Latte with one spoonful of sugar?" You asked, her face coming back to you bit by bit.

   "Yeah!"she beamed, unnaturally happy that her barista remembered her face. 

   "Nice to finally.. knowing you? " You joked, cocking your head. "I gotta go now. I will see you at the shop I guess" You said turning to see if Yuqi was still were you last saw her. She was. "Goodbye " you waved, before making your merry way to your table.

   "See you then"She called,waving. 

   As you made your way to your friends,you accidentally locked gazes with a boy who sat on the near table. Why was he looking at you so persistently? But then you noticed his gaze was still nailed to the spot, where your exchange with Soojin have been. You looked over your shoulder seeing Soojin talking with a tall male. Oh, well that made more sense, you snickered and started walking away.

   "Girl!" Yuqi exclaimed seeing you approach. "You okay? You fell on your ass pretty hard." She laughed that throaty laugh of hers, clearly enjoying your suffering.

   "I am glad my suffering and humiliation is funny to you" you murmured as you took a sit across her.

   "Don't pay attention to her, bub. You okay?" Yuna asked. She was always a motherly figure to the group, always asking and caring about you two. 

   "Thank you Yuna. I am fine Yuna" you answered sweetly, not looking to the direction of Yuqi. In response she laughed even harder, mocking me right back. 

   "Did you figure out what to do with your tutor problem?" The orange haired hirl asked as she was playing with the remaining food on her tray.

   "My second line of defense is Kim Hong Joong. I know him, sort of. Wooyoung is friends with him. I will try to get more info from him, I guess" you answered, unsure as you are a spoonful of the food the girls brought you.

   "And the third Kim?"she asked, mirth dancing in her eyes. She found it extremely funny that the top 3 students of the school were Kims'. 

   "Kim Seungmin." You muttered,against your bitten fingernails. Anxiety was not your scene. "I didn't find him on insta. I don't really know anyone who knows him. I will have to snoop around" Yuna swatted your bitten hand away from your mouth. 

   "I can ask some people if you want" suggested Yuqi, in the mist of a bite. You nodded gratefully towards her. Yuna looked between you two, several times before signing "You know you should stop talking like you are members of a mafia gang" she contemplated, finishing the last of her desert. 

   You looked at Yuqi, cocked your head and with one voice you both answered: "No"

   Yuna laughed, raising her hands as if she was admitting defeat, Yuqi and you soon followed.

   You were on the very edge to being late.

Once again your professor thought that, their lesson was the only thing taking up your time so he thought it would do you good to deepen on the subject. 

  For an extra half hour.

 Which left you with little time to no time to eat, cause queues in the cafeteria were a bitch and hurrying to make your way to your afternoon shift.

   When the coffee shop was on your line of vision, you were finally able to catch your breath. Usually the sight of the small coffee shop that was full of  glass covered walls and potted plants brought you a sense of calm. Today you were on edge though, not only you were running all the way from across campus, but you were going to ask Wooyoung about Kim Hong Joong's number so you can make contact with your second contestant. 

   As soon as you walked through the glass door, the sound of shutters going off greeted you. Your boss's idea to make the place instagramable was the best thing that could happen to her. Cute art on the walls, well placed neon lights, that were not over the top and fit the relaxing vibe of the shop were placed on bare walls, that the costumers could be photographed against. Cute cozy sofas and chairs in pale colors were all over the shop. A grand staircase by the bar lead to the second floor, which was reformed into a studying area for the struggling students. All in all, the shop was an instagram dream, the staff was consisted mostly of cute looking guys and dashing girls (you still couldn't understand how you got the job, you were pretty but those people were on a whole other level) but you wouldn't complain.

    You made your way behind the bar, into the staff room shedding your jacket and your favourite messenger bag and donned your black apron with the log of the shop.  By the time you were out, Wooyoung was leaning against the counter, sweet talking to some girls that were giggling in response. You shook your head and started to make a cup of coffee for yourself, reading yourself for a busy shift. 

    You had barely touched the machine, when you noticed a tall boy waving at you to get your attention. You went to him and started reciting your familiar line: "Hello. What can I get you?"

    He smiled prettily at you and leaned slightly closer so he can speak more quietly "Hello.. Can I order a coffee and maybe you can deliver it to the table?" He asked, scratching the back of his neck, not sure how to get out his inner thoughts.

     "Sure" you answered easily. "What can I get you?"

      "A vanilla latte with one spoonful of sugar please. Can you deliver it to the table by the window? To the girl with the green cardigan. Tell her it's from Eric" you raised your head to the direction the boy pointed and saw Soojin sitting there with a couple of friends you vaguely recognized.

     "Well, Eric...consider me your cupid for the evening. Don't leave until after I give her the drink" You supplied with a crooked grin as you made the coffee. You exited the bar and drink in hand you made your way to the girls.

     "Good evening Soojin. Girls" you greeted, placing the cup in front of her. "This is for you from the gentleman over there" you pointed out the lean form of Eric, that stood rooted in place. He gave an adorably awkward wave and a charming smile and bolted (as confidently as he could) out of the door.

      "You are for sure popular" you joked.

    She politely raised her hands, silently arguing with your statement. "You just got here? Is.. Jisung's.. shift over?"

      "Jisung is the brunette one. The red headed one is Wooyoung. But yes, he is done for the day. And I am just getting started..Yay.." You made sure to plaster a very fake smile to show your.. excitement for the day that is to come. "Anyway, nice seeing you again. I gotta go back now" you said, already walking backwards to your post.

       "Hey Y/N! How it's going?" Wooyoung greeted you now that the coast was clear of beautiful girls, that required his attention.

      "I am good. I wanted to ask you something though... about your friend Hong Joong-"you started to say, but was rudely interrupted.

       "While you are beautiful, he is currently semi-available. He has his sight on this girl-" he started, but you quickly cut him off.

       "Thank you for the unwanted info and for the compliment, but that was not my intention. I actually wanted to know if he is interested in tutoring. I learned that, he is one of the top students. Currently math and physics are making my life a living hell and I thought maybe someone who was on a more...high intellectual level, would be able to help little old me" you finished.

       He stared for bit before answering "Well, I don't know if he have the time, but I'll tell you what. I'll give you his number so you can ask him yourself" he exclaimed, already fishing his phone out of his back pocket.

      "Thank you, Wooyoung! I owe you one!"  You grinded big and wide. Maybe luck would be on your side this time. "How it's going with Somi by the way?" You asked, as you put your phone back to its place under the bar.

       His smile immediately fell and frustration took place. "She hasn't called, texted or anything! I just don't understand! We go out, have fun, we are talking and suddenly, she disappears! Is that normal?" He cried out, hands shooting to his fiery locks, messing them further up.

      "Maybe she doesn't know what she wants yet. Or maybe she hasn't cleared up a previous relationship yet and is hesitant to get involved with you" you shrugged as you leaned back into the wooden surface of the cashier.

     "Well why can't she say so then?! What does she think that I would do?" He clicked his tongue as he cleaned the tools he used to make a coffee. At least he was putting his frustration into good use.

        "Hello!" A voice sounded from behind you and you turned to ask yet again, what the next person would like.

     You were once again on your way to the coffee shop. You swore that these days the shop saw you more than your own house. It was a sorry excuse of a house really, but it was a house. You couldn't complain, it was cheap rent and a roof over your head. You walked into the shop and immediately you were greeted by a familiar voice "Hello! What would you lik- Oh it's you" the man finished, his voice significantly lower by the end of his sentence.

      "Nice to see you too, Sung" you sassed back, walking to the bar where he usually lounged. "An Americano, please! Is he here?" You inquired as you watched him get to work. The shade he dyed his hair now suited him very well, you thought. Pure black with blue undertones. You had heard several girls gossiping or rather complimenting him on his new appearance. He had let his hair grow a bit longer, not enough to grow a mullet, but enough to ruffle through. Today he donned a white shirt and black skinny jeans with chains, that gave him an edge. He never learned his lesson though, you clicked your tongue, white clothes and making coffee didn't go together. As he turned to you, you noticed a tiny stain on his sleeve. You passed him a bill as you took your coffee.

       "Yeah, he is upstairs" he answered as he passed your bill right back to you, winking.

        "Thank you love" you said, winking back and making your way upstairs. For a Wednesday afternoon the second floor was understandable empty, especially at the beginning of the semester. That's why you immediately knew who was the party who awaited you. You crossed the floor and took the opposite seat. "Hong Joong, right?"

        "Yes. Y/N?" He asked you, hands around his cappuccino. He had a small face, his straight slim nose was a masterpiece you were jealous of and pared with a nice set of lips, he seemed adorable. What greatly contrasted his sweet face was his wild half white half black hair, that was styled into a mullet with the side chopped off. Along with his hair, his multiple piercings gave off a more bad boy vibe that you were used to.

        "Yeah thank you so much that you agreed to come. Wooyoung mentioned your.. hectic schedule." You laughed the awkwardness off. 

       "Don't mention it! I came to talk to you, but I don't know if I can help you. I am on my final year and this will get crazy pretty soon." He said, grimacing throughout every word. He threw an apologetic smile towards you, but you cutt him off before he could continue.

        "Yeah I know! I know and I don't want to pressure you! But I really need help.. I really can't afford to fail.. I can be available whenever  you are. If you tell me in advance, I can schedule it with my manager so my shifts won't be a problem." you breathed, suddenly dropping out was becoming a very real problem. You never thought that you would be so close to failing and doing so was not an option.

       "Well then..okay. I will try to help you. But just so you know things will be difficult. Mainly because my hours can be weird-"

       "I am fine with that! Just-...Thank you" you finished, a grateful smile spreading across your face.

       "How about we start now?" He suggested with an oh-so-innocent smile on his face. 

       "Now now? Well I have only my math notebook with me.."you trailed.

       "Excellent! I can see where do you get stuck then!"

       "Yes! Thank you Hong Joong!"

        "..And then she tried to call your grandma out!" He cried out onto the speaker 

        You laughed loudly at that. "Did she beat this granny up?" You questioned, knowing oh so well your grandma's fiery temper.

      "They almost dueled on the supermarket with the carts!" He giggled, recalling the scene.

      "Damn! I wish I was there to see her!" You cheered gleefully. You had missed your home.

         "Aahh you should have seen her! Now that you said this..when are you coming home?? Your grandparents are talking my ear off! They want to see you! And so do I?You know better than this!" He laughed that full belly laugh of his. 

     "I will come home for Christmas daddy. I promise!" You oathed. 

    "Can't you miss one weekend?" He asked, defeat evident on his tone. You couldn't miss your shifts, but he didn't have to know that. 

  "I will be there before you even know it, old man!" You sassed, distracting him. 

 "Yeah, right " he scoffed into the line.

You couldn't go now. Not when everything was going great!

     Everything, for once, was going in your way! You and Hoonie were on spectacular terms when it came on understanding, he explained everything so well, that it was practically impossible not to get it! Your physics professor ,after seeing your newfound effort in her class and after a particular talk with Mr. Marlow, agreed to give you an extra project, so you can get some much needed credit.

     You were running around double the time you were used to, but it was worth it. Many times Hong Joong would finish particularly late, so he would come over to teach you and you would study well into the early hours of the morning, but you were content. You were good on your house payments, even making something extra to send to your dad. He was on house installments that were kicking his ass and together with your grandparents he made it through, but with little to spare. 

     Your phone vibrated as you spoke. You checked it out seeing the familiar Instagram name of Hong Joong."Yes yes dad! I gotta go now. I love you" 

        "-ve you too " you vaguely heard him call out, before you hung up. A message from Hong Joong made you freeze. 

We should talk.

That's all it said. You quickly unlocked your phone, searching for his number and called.

         "Hey Hong Joong! I saw your message.. Is everything okay?"you inquired, plopping down your bed. You should reverse it back to the couch setting, since you expected the man that you were currently on the phone with, you mentally noted.

         "Yeah, but I have some bad news. I will tell you in person. We have a session in 2 hours right?" He asked, absentmindedly as he was shuffling through papers. He was making so much noise you could barely hear him.

        "Yeah, I will be expecting you Hoonie"you said as you nervously bounced on your bed.

       "Do a recap, okay? I will test you on the last four chapters" More shuffling was heard from the other end of the line. 

       "Okay.. I have the papers you were asking for ready, by the way. I asked my friend" you mumbled, teeth already working on your ruined nails.

       "Thank you Y/Nie! I won't be long" he chanted, his voice more distant now.

        "Ok! Byee!" you called. You shouldn't panic, maybe he wanted to tell you about a problem he had found on your worksheet, you reasoned. It didn't have to be anything bad. You decided to distract yourself, you had chores to do and a review to complete before Hong Joong arrived. Get up, you said to yourself. Don't think about it.

         You pulled yourself up and started collecting your fallen clothes, that you had scattered around in your try to get to your lecture on time this morning. You should go to the laundry mat later, you noted. The pots, that were left on the sink yesterday evening, were starting to smell so you donned your apron and quickly started cleaning the kitchen as well. An hour passed by, before you settled on your old but comfy grey couch-bed to study per request of Hong Joong. Math were starting to get easier as you went by, but they were still a pain to deal with.

    Not much time passed, or so you thought, before you heard a knock. You looked at your clock to see it was six o'clock already.

        You stretched over the sofa to reach the doorknob, turning slightly to let Jong Joong in.

      "You know you shouldn't open the door like that. What if I was a stranger trying to rob you?" He said as he passed the threshold, already hand in his backpack to get out his books. 

       "If someone came in and saw me like this, he wouldn't tried to rob me, he would pity me so much that he would even give me pocket money' you said, eyebrows lifting as you watched him spread books upon books on your coffee table and on your floor. 

      "Ha ha" he ironically said. "Are you ready?" 

      "What was that you wanted to tell me?" You wondered.

      He hesitated, but eventually he said "Let's study first ..I will tell you after." Do you studied meticulously for the next hour or so. And when you thought the torture had finished, you were in for an equal bad time.

      "What?!"you incrediously exclaimed, shocked by the news. "Noo!" you shouted in despair. 

      "I am sorry. We are only a month in and I couldn't keep up." He admitted regretfully.

      "No...this isn't your fault Hoonie. I had known that you would be burdened eventually. Your final year is beating your ass, you should do your best to concentrate" you admitted, head lowering. Despite your words of encouragement, you felt as someone was destroying your carefully build house of cards.

       "Thanks for understanding. And if it comforts you are doing much better already!" He tried to cheer you up, but a look on your face was enough to shut him up. "Do you have a backup plan?" He asked you, concerned.

        "I have one more person, that was recommended to me. But I don't know him so I have to look him up. I hope that he is accepting "you signed, checking your phone. "Hey, do you have plans right now? Yuqi and Yuna are coming for a movie night" 

        "I have plans with Yunho and Mingi, but I appreciate the offer. Good night, Y/N!"

        You smiled and waved him goodbye. You would have to study twice as hard now. It was true, that you were getting better. Physics, with a little more effort, would be doable. Math on the other hand...

         You opened your phone, entering Instagram. You tapped on the search bar and typed Kim Seungmin. But no results came.. well it came up with several names and faces, but none of them was connected to your university or had common friends with you.. How the hell you were supposed to find him? You searched on Facebook, on Viber too.. N.O.T.H.I.N.G! Was the dude a ghost or something?

       A knock on your door pulled you out of your daydream. You recognized the loud voices and the frequent giggles, so once again you opened the door without checking. 

       "Babyy~" arms wrapped around you and the smell of peaches filled your senses. Yuqi rocked you in her arms, quite strongly, for such a petite figure. "How was your lesson with Joong?" She asked as she released you and Yuna made her way into your small home, carrying a large pizza.

         "Hoonie was wonderful, but that was our last lesson" you wailed. Wiping fake tears, you continued "He got assigned to two new projects and his professor suggested him for a possible internship. I mean, I am happy for him. I am just worried." You ranted as you got up.

        You made your way to your fridge and took out a half empty bottle of rose wine, that you kept especially for movie nights. You grabbed 3 glasses and returned to the girls that were already opening the bed. You passed each of them a glass and took a sit on the head of the bed.

         "So now what?" Yuna asked as she took her first bite of her pizza.

         "I tried searching for Kim Seungmin on insta, on facebook, on everything! But I came up empty...I will try some more and if I can't find him...I will just do whatever I can on my own." Yuna's hand rubbed soothing circles on your back. You looked up only to find their concerned gazes focused on you.  "Hey don't look at me like that! Come on! Let's forget about it and eat! On which episode we paused last?"

         "The 12th! Finally! I was waiting the whole week for this!" Yuna cheered "Do you know that, they will make a second season?"

         "As they should. Alchemy of souls is a masterpiece! I would watch 10 more seasons!" 

         As the tittle song rolled in, all of you fell quiet and let the amazing drama pull you in.

    "Y/N!!!"

  A piercing scream in the form of your name echoed inside the coffee shop. Some customers were startled, some were plain staring at the hurricane,that was Yuqi. 

       You shushed her warningly and turned with a very fake smile to the customer in front of you. The guy gave you an understanding look, took his coffee and left you with the loud girl. 

     "You'll never guess! You owe me! You owe me!" She was literally rocking on her heels, her hands clasped together and looking at you adorably excited. "So about the thing with your third Kim. I asked Lucas, who asked Yuta, who knew that Ten and Minho are friends, that Minho is friends with Seungmin. But guess who Minho and Seungmin are friends with?!" She finished without a breath and left you staring at her. 

       You blinked twice. "You should have become a rapper, not a linguist" you amazed. "And also... what?"

        "Girl! Focus! Kim Seungmin! The target! We know who he is!" She exclaimed, her excitement peaking again. "Kim Seungmin. Second year like us. Science department, dental care. Tall, brunette, glasses. He doesn't really have a large friend group. He is close with Minho, who I mentioned earlier and guess who else?!"

        "Who?" you asked, looking at her rather dumply. 

        Not caring about you not catching up, she exclaimed a name you didn't expect. "Han Jisung!" 

        That startled you out of your shock. "My Jisung?" You questioned, pointing at the culprit who was cheerily cleaning up the station. The only response you received was a fierce nod from her. Luck was smiling at you again. So you took casual but calculated steps towards the boy, who had his back turned to you. 

         "Jisung! My man! How are you?" you squealed as you placed your hands around him, successfully capturing him. He turned around with a smile, not having a better sense to start running away. 

         "When we last talked..you know 7 minutes ago..I was well."he laughed as he wiped his hands on the only dry towel we kept in our station. 

           "I have heard you are friends with Lee Minho and Kim Seungmin.."you started, not really knowing how to tell him but a voice stopped you on your tracks.

           "What would you like to know about me?" A smug voice asked from the counter. You turned and saw a new presence next to an awkward Yuqi. The new arrival was a little taller than Yuqi, brown locks,almost honey colored, were framing his slim face. His eyes were up turned, feline like and they were watching your every move with intelligent and playfulness. Like a true cat. His lips were slightly up turned as well, giving you the impression that he was silently laughing at you. 

      "Who are you?" you asked as you approached the cashier where he was standing, not knowing better yourself. 

       Eyebrows raised and smug smile intact. "I am Lee Minho. I heard you talking about me." he returned as he tapped his fingers against the counter. 

        "Oh!" you said, finally understanding. "Actually I was interested in your friend-" 

        "Seungmin!"

        "Seungmin!"

   Two voices cut the air, equally shocked. You looked both at the stranger by the cashier and your coworker in wonder. Their smiles threaten to break off their faces, eyes widened with pleasant surprise. Oh! They misunderstood you. "No! No! It's not what you are thinking! I actually am searching for a tutor and I was told he was on top of the academic list. But I can't find him anywhere" 

       "Ahh.." 

       "Ahh.." 

    In union they let out an equally disappointed sign, making you let out an amused huff. 

       "It's a shame tho...I think you would suit each other.."murmured Jisung, tousling his hair gently. 

        "You could give him a run for his money. From what Jisung told me about you." Minho pleasantly hummed.

         You turned to face your friend, eyes squinted and face accusing. He immediately raised his hands and denied any guilt. The rest of your company let out laughs at the comical scene. 

          "But jokes aside. Our Seungminnie is a little... emotionally constipated. Yeah, let's say that." Minho explained as he scanned the menu now. Yuqi was silent by his side, eyeing between you and him. "Other than that, he is an lovable idiot"

        He eventually ordered to Jisung, who started making the drink right away. "What do you mean by that?"you asked. 

        "Well he is rather reserved and he is the no bullshit type of guy. He will not be likely to accept tutoring you." 

        Wonderful. That was exactly what you didn't want to hear.

        Well you hoped you could have to change that. 

    You turned to him, with a hint of a smile and asked him.

      "Can you tell me where I can find him?"

      After your short talk with Minho and Jisung, you stalked Kim Seungmin. 

      You and Yuqi were the main agents, that were running all over the place. The first time you caught a glimpse of him with Minho and Jisung at the courtyard, chilling leisurely. In contrast to what Minho told you, he seemed lovely, cute smile and animated talking from what you saw. You spotted him going to class, thankfully your hours matched, so you had an eye on him. You even saw him at the coffee shop a time or two, though he never stayed. 

     From what you gathered he was a reserved guy, just as Minho said. He didn't really talk to many people, he made a funny comment or two, but then he was out of sight. You currently were on the cafeteria, with Yuna and Ryunjin by your side, watching him from afar. He was sitting with a black haired boy you didn't know, he looked quite young though (probably younger than you two)  and was constantly glancing somewhere. You tried to follow his gaze, but you couldn't pint point where it landed every time. Something in your gut told you to pay attention though, as if this could be the solution to your problems. 

And you always trusted your gut.

       So the gazes continued. He was watching someone and you were watching him. Just as you were growing tired of this and was beginning to quit your whole detective game, his gaze shifted. The person he was watching was moving towards the exit. So you snapped your gaze at the door and there they stood, in all their glory against the sunlight that burst through the glass walls. As fair as the snow white herself. You turned your gaze towards Seungmin again, watching him ogle Lee Soojin, like an idiot in love and a smile made itself known in your face. 

      You had a plan.

    After careful examination, or detective work as Yuqi had affectionate calling it, you finally had confirmed your hatch. 

    A little more stalking was required, but along with the help you received from your girls, it was easy as a piece of cake. 

    A little comments here and there in an attempt to make Jisung spill some beans, which worked wonderfully and left him in a stupor (you made yourself a mental note not to trust him with anything personal again), and your plan was set.

    It was a little bit of a stretch, to think that he would agree to help you just so he can get a girlfriend, but you had no options left. Math was kicking your ass again and alone you were struggling, it was like you were drowning and you were trying to paddle your way through.

    You just needed a lifeline that would get you through. Just for the upcoming exams. So determinately you lifted your chin and made your way to the library.      

         You hadn't made it a habit to visit the library. You hadn't had the time either. 

You stood outside for a beat, gathering your wits. The building was tall and imposing, making you even more hesitant to go in. But you had to brave it, you had to fake it till you make it.

   You took one big breath and entered. The three floor building seemed even bigger on the inside. Old wood, that was a miracle that still held, was everywhere and the smell of old books surrounded the place. Your eyes ranked over the multiple desks, that held many students. No, not him. Him neither. No. And here he was. Your eyes found him.

    He was there, just like Minho said he would. He was taller than you expected. And more handsome. Soft brown locks that were cut into a neat haircut fell just above his eyes. Glasses stood high on his straight nose, hiding the exact color of his eyes due to the light hitting on them, but if your own eyes didn't deceive you you would swear that they were a dark brown, maybe even onyx like. He wore a serious expression, his mouth pressed into a thin line. The oversized white tee he wore, along with the black cargo pants didn't do wonders on his figure but he sure looked comfy in them. He also looked very concentrated and you felt bad to break it off, but not bad enough not to do it. 

       You criss crossed between the tables and unsuspecting students and plopped down on the opposite seat. He briefly looked up from his laptop, but upon seeing your unfamiliar face, he soon returned his gaze at the screen in front of him. 

      "Hi, you're Kim Seungmin, right?" You slowly asked, testing the waters. When the words left your mouth, he slowly looked up and met my gaze. He seemed unsure of what my deal was and not really keen on finding out. 

     "Yes, that would be me" he said, not offering any other information or asking for your own name, for that fact. His face stayed the same as when he was reading. 

     Great.. from what it seems, this was the default.

     "Since you didn't ask. Hi, my name is Y/N and I am here to propose a deal to you." You said, bringing your hands on the table and waving them together. He didn't say anything just made himself more comfortable on the chair and his figure slouching . 

      "I am on the verge of failing my math class and I need help. Your help to be exact." He crossed his arms and leaned back further. No emotion yet on his face, a subtle raise of his eyebrow was the only answer you got, something similar to a disbelieving scoff leaving him, he seemed like he was mocking you. But you didn't know if you were imagining things, just to fill that void in his facade. Maybe if you stroked his ego? "They said to come to you and that you were one of the top three students of the school" you said putting your chin on top of hands, smile still intact. Be pleasant and nice was your only option. Smile and waved boys, just smile and wave.

        He leaned forward, mimicking your posture. His hands were long and elegant you noticed, like that of a piano player. "Thank you for the.. preference. But I will have to decline" he said with a grimace that some would call a smile. You knew better.

       "But you didn't let me finish. It has come to my knowledge that you like Lee Soojin" you said, a smile making it's way on your face.             Finally, a spark of emotion! His  eyes momentarily widened and his mouth fell slightly open before he straightened his expression, he immediately turned his head right and left and he leaned closer to you, glaring intensely. You grinned even wider at the action, a crack in his armor was all you needed.

     He continued glaring at you for a moment, clearly contemplating if killing you was the safest option, but eventually he fell back against his chair, not speaking a word.

     "I can help you get together with her. I saw you watching her from a far. I happened to know her, she is a regular to the cafe I work at" you begun before he could open his mouth.

          His face didn't change much, now annoyance was a little more prominent, but the emptiness still ruled over his face.  "Unfortunately, I will not be helping you as I have my own issues and I believe the second statement is none of your business. I wish I could say that it was a pleasure meeting you but I avoid lying. Have a good day" he said, utterly dismissing you. He turned back to his laptop, leisurely fixing his glasses, not giving you an other lick of attention.

 Well that went exactly as they warned you. When Minho said emotionally constipated, you didn't think they really meant it. Even though you wanted to grab him by his shoulders and shake him, you couldn't force him to accept. You had played your cards and lost. As you would probably lose your scholarship..

            You looked at him for a moment, then collected your stuff from the chair you had pushed them into and stood "If you change your mind, you will find me at the coffee shop by the uni. You know the one Soojin goes. Have a good day "you said, almost giggling to the look he threw you, at the mention of the girl's name. You gave him a salute and turned walking away so you can cry away your day in peace.

       Despite you thinking that the promise of a girlfriend would be enough, mister Kim Seungmin proved you wrong and didn't agree to your offer. So you were left struggling alone just shy of October. To your surprise and utter delight of Mr. Marlow, you were decent enough in physics now. Your physic proff was moved by your struggle and impressed by your newfound knowledge so she agreed to give you a couple of projects, in order to make up for the lost grades. It was a real pain in the ass to balance your university life, along with work and the extra hours of studying that you put in to catch up, but at least you were afloat..for now. 

      And despite of denying your deal you saw more and more of Kim Seungmin. First it was at the cafeteria, him gazing discreetly at her and you gazing at them. Once or twice, your eyes would meet and you would raise your eyebrow at him, secretly judging. He would answer with a fiery look and squinting eyes back at you.

  You would meet him at campus were he would simply hangout with his friends. You had repeatedly greeted them, asking the usual 'how are you' and 'are you good', both Jisung and Minho had answered you (your coworker bubbly as ever and Minho albeit with less enthusiasm but not unfriendly), but Seungmin just stared you emptily. You swore he only had two emotions, emptiness and aggression. If he had more.. well you had yet to see them. 

     The third place he frequent went in was no other than your workplace. He collected the info you gave him, the sneaky bastard, and used it without you reaping the benefits. He showed up just a week after your meet up. As Minho's friend he had visited the place before and sure, he could have grabbed a casual pick-me-up, but he had never sat down on the cafe. One day though, he rolled up in a casual sky blue hoodie and a pair of jeans with his own trusted bad on his shoulders. A cute pair of glasses decorated his face and his hair, even messy, had a certain charm.

    Such a waste of good looks, you thought. His face upon seeing you behind the bar was comical to say the least. He was pretty neutral before entering, a calming aura around him but when he saw you, his lips pressed together in a grimace and a cold demeanor met you. You had smiled though and took his order, mentally scoffing. A black Americano. How unoriginal. 

     He had came up empty that day, as Soojin hadn't shown up. His next try was successful, not only he had manage to nail the time the girl came ,but also managed to secure a spot near her table. His subtle heart eyes made you want to puke. 

     His third time though was your favourite. Soojin was by her usual corner, but she was not alone this time. Eric was by her side in all his blonde glory, making the girl giggle and blush so hard. Of course Mr Kim Seungmin was shooting lazer from his eyes, face empty and eyes filled with the promise of murder. It was a delightful thing.

        Two weeks flew by and your panicked began to rise. A typical Wednesday and you were staring blankly at the entrance, wondering if a future as a barista was the only option left for you. Your train of thought was rudely interrupted by a tall figure getting all up in your face. A tall brown haired menace.

   As the days flew by your polite smiles turned into sarcasm filled giggles and a pressing desire to annoy the fuck out of his majesty, the genius. So you looked up to meet his eyes, met with the usual picture of him frowning down at you. 

       "Can I help you?" You asked monotone, already moving away to prepare his order. He never tried anything else besides his bland americano. 

        He didn't move, only looked at you decisively. He leaned over the counter as much as he could "I don't want coffee. I want to talk to you" You stared at him. Did you want to be rude and deny? He deserved it, but that would require your downfall so you swallowed your pride and nodded.

       You quickly told  Shushua you would be a minute and leaded Seungmin into a quiet corner of the shop. You sat down and the staring match began. 

     You knew this, this was a war of nerves. As a business major you knew he wanted the deal you presented, but he was stubborn enough not to begin the discussion. " You thought about my proposal?" You probed gently.

      After a brief hesitation he nodded and finally spoke. "I would be willing to help you" he stated simply. He was truly a man of few words. You hoped that didn't seep through to his teaching. 

       "Wonderful!" You cheered, clapping once in satisfaction and leaning back to your plush chair. " When can you start? I am in immediate need of attention" you joked, just to see him squirm. He didn't disappoint as he lightly shifted his weight on the comfortable couch he sat. 

        "I don't work.. so we can follow your program" he stated dismissively. "Where do you lack?" He seemed more comfortable focusing his attention on your academic problem, than his unrequited crush. Cute, you thought.

       "Math is my main problem. I fixed my physics grade enough to pass through this semester. Maybe a lesson or two in exam season, if you are kind enough." You listed, resting your head in your hand. You should sound dismissive and aloof and play your cards right this time. 

      "Okay we can work on that.." he trailed off, not knowing how to get on with the conversation.

       "You should open an Instagram page" you suddenly said. He needed the exposure you had decided. He had the looks, he was smart and if we worked on his manners.. he could get Soojin.

        He scoffed, right back at his usual self. "And why would I do that?" He asked, now that you knew him a little, his voice filled with disbelief and irony.

       "So you can show off your good looks to Soojin obviously. From my point of you this is the only thing you have going on" you stated, smirking. His relaxed, albeit a little uncomfortable, pose tensed. "It's adorable how tense you get when I mention her" you teased, lips curling a little, not able to resist. You had to ask. "What made you change your mind?"

    "I thought about it. That's it"  You looked at him. His jaw was clenched, his posture still tense and he was looking you straight in the eyes, almost as if he was daring you to say it.

   "Are you sure? Are you sure that someone didn't help in changing your mind? Like someone trying to get your girl. Someone named...Eric?" you waved your fingers together and placed your chin lightly on them. From the way his body tensed even more, his mouth was pressed into a thin line, fully concealing his full lips and the lightly squinting of his eyes, you hit bulls eye. 

      "Well.. appearance wise, I don't have a lot to fix. Personality wise though..we could do so much better." You innocently smile. "Anyway she is on social a lot, she often comes to take photos here, she even followed me. The first step we have to make is her acknowledging you. So genius boy... When are you free?" 

     His way of teaching is as insufferable as he is you soon learned.

     You had agreed to meet at the library. The tall building served as an excellent place as he wasn't keen on visiting your house. It was fine by you, you weren't thrilled about having him in your apartment as well.

       The first thing he did was a through  exploration of your knowledge. And then, the torture began. Equations, problems, types... And a good chunk of it, you failed to get.

     "You must be kidding! Even the professor doesn't give us that much homework!" You dramatically yelled, earning a few looks from the people around you and a glare from your companion.

     "If you want to improve, this is the appropriate amount. It's truly remarkable how much you don't understand" he noted as he started gathering his books, placing them neatly in a navy blue backpack. You were amazed at capability of his backpack. You could probably fit yourself in there, if you tried.

     "I am a marketing major! I don't need to know these things!" You cried out, more quietly this time, no less dramatic though, desperation coloring your voice. 

      "You are in marketing?" He asked, taken aback. You were crossing the entrance of the library and stood there for a moment. Should you be offended by his surprise?

      "Yeah, why the surprise? What you thought I would be?" You rocked on your heel, craning your neck to look at him. 

       "Something more dramatic. Performing arts, perhaps" he replied. Well... you could give him that. You could be a total drama queen when you wanted.

       "I will inform you, that I am excellent at what I do. Point proven by the fact you are here. I advertised my deal in an appealing way, you weighted your options and you took mine." You said, trying to bite back the smile you could feel surfacing. He grimaced at your wording, not being able to deny the truth.

        "Whatever." He said as he began to walk to a direction that you had not in mind. So you reached for his precious backpack and pulled him towards you. He lightly stumbled, but regained his footing quickly and turned to you, eyebrows raised and mouth pulled tight together. "What?"

        You smiled up at him. "I thought our deal should be fair. After our lessons, it will be your turn. So today we are going to the cafe!" You pulled once again, at his sleeve this time and much to your surprise he followed you without complains.

     You let him go and walked backwards so you can face him "Soojin visits the cafe regularly. But Fridays are a must for her. Her lecture is done at two, so she eats at the cafeteria and she usually comes around 3ish"

      "You know too much for someone who is simply her barista" he noted, eyes fleeting at the road behind you and refocusing on your face. You shrugged nonchalantly.

      "You would be surprised at what I know " you dismissed. You turned to walk normally and adjusted your brown messenger bag on your shoulder. You should try using a backpack as well, you adored the bag but the weight was starting to hurt your shoulder, especially with the weight of the extra books. "After going to the cafe, we are going to have a photoshoot!"    

He looked at me from the side like I had grown a second head and shook his head."No"        

         "Yep"        

         "No"      

         "Yep!"   

         "No!" He raised his voice for once matching your tone, but quickly he cleared his throat and said "I am not doing it"     You threw a smile over your shoulder and opened the door to the cafe you had reached. People littered a few tables, here and there, but a calmness ruled over, a calmness that your loud coworker disturbed with over hyper 

tunes.

 His bright red hair served just as an additional distraction from the comfy atmosphere as it caught the light from the way he moved all over the place from behind the bar. You smiled and you made your way to him. You didn't turn to check, but you felt Seungmin following silently behind you.

     "Wooyoung!" You exclaimed, successfully capturing his attention. You dramatically threw yourself over the counter top and whined for coffee. 

       "Hello to you too!"he giggled and threw a polite smile over your shoulder to the giant behind you "Hello!" He said, receiving a nod from Seungmin and turned back to you "How was your lesson?" He asked as he showed his back to you, starting to make the precious drink you desired.

      "Awful" you and Seungmin answered as one. The 2 hour session clearly weighted down both of you. "And a black americano as well, Woo" you added, reaching into your bag to pull out your wallet. 

        A hand fell on top of yours stopping you and you turned towards the boy, a question in your eyes. He shook his head and answered "You don't have to buy me coffee"

     "You are helping basically for free. A coffee isn't much" you cheered back. Giving your card to a awaiting Wooyoung, he passed it over the machine quickly before giving it back. 

     "Were are you heading now?" He asked as he prompted his head on the counter. 

      "We were thinking about taking a walk in the park near by. You know... the one with the garden" you absentmindedly returned as you scanned the place, not telling him that it was in fact Seungmin that informed you about its existence, mere minutes before. 

     And score. At the far away corner sat a certain snow white. Target required "Woo ,I will talk to you later. We are still on for Sunday right?" You threw, getting a response you didn't pay any attention to and strode towards your prey. A tug on your arm halted you, a grim Seungmin shaking his head greeted you, but you promptly ignored his whines and mouthed a 'come on'. You reached the table rather quickly and called "Soojin! What is my favorite customer doing?!" 

       The brunette turned with a smile on her face "Favorite customer huh? You say that to everyone" she teased you, good natured.

      "Pss no!.. Only on regulars" you commented, giving her a wink, which made her let out a quiet giggle, before her gaze shifted behind me.. bingo. You also threw a look to the boy that stood behind you, almost as if he was hiding behind his mom. "That's my new tutor, Kim Seungmin. He really saved me. This is Lee Soojin, she comes by often so I guess you will be seeing each other" you finished, turning your body sideways so more of Seungmin could be shown. No that you could hide him, you snorted. 

        "Nice to meet you" she showed a bright welcoming smile at him, that quite literally made him shake. You couldn't blame him through, if you had been in his shoes, you would have fell on your knees too. 

        "You too" he quietly said, looking at the table and avoiding eye contact at all means. You looked at him, trying to control your laughter.

       "Well.. we have to get going! But I will see you around "you waved, throwing a smile at the rest of her group and tugged your tutor along with you.

   You waited until you two were no longer visible throughout the windows and turned to him, hands behind your back and your foot awkwardly scratching the ground and said in a manly voice that in no way resembles the one you mocked. "Y-You t-too" you mumbled, looking at him from underneath your lashes.        His face was comical. His jaw was clenched hard and his ears were an adorable shade of red. "Shut up" he said, looking everywhere else but you. 

       "Come on! Let's get you your photos, doc"

      The Instagram business went well. The  park was a lovely place to get the photos you needed, even with your uncooperative model. His friends cheered and howled, welcoming him to the civilized world. Two days later, your first story starring him at the library (unknown to him) with the caption: 'study session with @kim_seungmin' had  earned him a follow from The Lee Soojin.               Instagram has became your main form of communication as well, it started with you sending memes that reminded you of him, mainly Squidward memes, and proceed with him spamming you with math questions. A look in your notifications was truly a nightmare now. You learned that the boy was more on the grumpy side, but had always had good intentions. Minho had let it slip that, he had an alarm on his phone especially to remind him to send you your insta-homework. You also discovered that he also shared a great love for kdramas, similar to your own. Contrary to the first meeting where he uttered only a couple of words, he spoke more comfortably now, not less savage but you could usually find him in a conversationable mood. Your quick tongue and his unbothered nature made you a interesting duo. And a duo that always had a target. Most often than not, poor Jisung had the short stick on this deal. 

         October was nearly over and you were excelling. Seungmin, on the other side, was not making so much progress with Soojin. Sure.. now he was talking a little bit with her in the coffee shop, when their tables were near.      And sure, they were exchanging likes on insta, but was that enough? On top of that, Eric was still regularly hanging around Soojin and that was making you uneasy. What if Seungmin decided to call the deal off, if they got together? What would happen to you then?

      That evening, you were meeting up with the girls so you reluctantly you picked yourself up and headed to your bathroom to get ready. Your dim lighting complimented your tired face. Or rather it didn't. It was a few weeks of that feverish schedule and you were begging to tire, but you shook yourself. 

   Put on some concealer and your best jeans, you said to yourself and soon enough you were braving the cold, in order to get some alcohol in you. 

          As soon as you entered the local bar, you took a look around you. Almost all of the booths were full, the jocks that were by the pool tables were howling loudly and the bar was half full of people trying to get their poisons. From the corner of your eye, you saw a sudden movement. Yuqi was waving at you, as Ryunjin and Yuna were giggling over who knows what number cocktails of the night. You broke out a smile and made your way over to them, avoiding busy waiters and drunk bodies. You took a seat in the enormous red couch by Yuqi and greeted the others. 

         "Won't Lisa and Rosie be joining us?" You asked, as you took a hold of the menu, already knowing you would order your usual Daquiri, but scanning it nonetheless. 

       "Nah, Lisa is doing two solos at the school festival and is freaking out. Rosie..is mental support, I guess" Ryunjin informed you as she sipped on her drink. You nodded and took a look around the bar. 

     Your waiter was nowhere on sight. But you understood, if you worked at a place like this you wouldn't be able to keep up with everyone either. But you did catch a quick glimpse of a particular sassy brunette on the dance floor. Minho did know how to have fun, that was certain by the smiles of his companions and the way they seemed to want to get closer to him. You wondered if your grumpy tutor lurked somewhere near. But a quick look at the place revealed a happy Jisung with two anonymous blondes by his side. You made a mental note to stop by and greet them later. 

        "What are we looking at?" A voice whispered, rather loudly, in your ear. You turned to Yuqi, grimacing, but answering all the same.

        "I spotted Minho on the dance floor and I was wondering if Seungmin was here" you truthfully replied. 

         She craned her neck to catch a glimpse of Minho as well. She looked at him way more than the respectable time, so you leaned in and tapped at her chin, a knowing look on your face. She chuckled but didn't deny anything. "You know for someone who you described as emotionally constipated, you get rather along with him" 

      You shrugged. "He was a little...shy in the beginning. All glares and moody. Now he is just... fun to tease" you huffed as you remembered him speaking so fast, almost rapping, when you told him that you hadn't completed a couple of exercises or him going red on the face from frustration when you couldn't understand a solution. "My biggest problem now is that he can't talk to Soojin!" Your deal was a known fact among your friends, that you have swore to secrecy. "He is cute, he is smart, once you get over the first shock he is pleasant to be around! Why he can't score a date with her?!" You wailed, dramatically flopping on the table. 

      "You should keep him to yourself, if he is that great" Yuna proposed, laughing as soon as you gave her the stink eye.

      "Why don't you tell him to come to the festival? Soojin is performing. He can come by the backstage, compliment her a little. Oh! Oh! Maybe ask her to go to a little walk around the festival!!" Ryunjin clapped, excited about her idea. 

       It wasn't so bad. Rather it was a rather good idea.

       "My sweet sweet genius!" You proclaimed, throwing your hands up in the air. "That's it!"

      As if the universe agreed and decided to reward you, your waiter appeared. So with a drink in your near future and a good plan to match, you enjoyed the rest of your evening. 

   "I am just saying, that you could be a lot more productive if instead of going out, you studied" He said, as he slid your red highlighted notebook back to you. 

     "You say that as if I am out everyday! I went out a Friday night to have a drink! Kill me!" You sassed as he signed and turned to his own workload.

     A moment passed and then two.

    You looked over at him under your lashes, biting your lips. Now it was just as good as any time you guessed. "Seungmin" you whispered. 

      Upon hearing the quiet call of his name he turned his head towards you. "You solved it?" He leaned closer only to see the math problem in front of you half solved and you looking at him. "Come on. We have done this. I am not helping you. Think again and solve it" he said almost soullessly, returning to his own homework. 

        "No no. I wanted to ask you something" you said, fumbling with your pen. "You.. haven't made so much progress with..you know who" you grimaced, remembering how many times you have uttered her name and Seungmin have immediately shut you up by placing his hand hastily over your mouth. Voldemort had she became.

      He let out a quiet sign, resting his head on the table. "Yeah..I mean we talk a little but.."

        "But not enough" you completed his sentence "Can I ..propose something?Why don't you try getting her a coffee and sit there with her?" You whispered, reaching your hand to play absentmindedly with your notebook. 

         "Yeah, I could do that" he mumbled as he straighten himself up, leaning onto his chair instead.  

         "I have an other proposal." You said, adopting his previous position and leaning onto the table. 

         "You scare me" he replied drily, with a hint of smile playing on the corner of his lips. 

         "Why? I am spectacularly amazing and I have at least 70% ratio of success" he snorted at that but didn't comment further "As you know ..SHE is a dance major. Why don't we go to see her performance? You say a few nice things to her, give her a smile, you know, tell her a 'I will see you around' Maybe offer a walk around the festival? We have to get her to notice you" 

         He looked everywhere but me, such simple conversations still managing to embarrass him. "That would be..nice" 

          "Perfect! I have already gotten you a ticket!" you cheered, collecting a few looks by the surrounding students. That's why you detested the library, quiet wasn't your forte. 

          At the sound of that he stilled and turned to look at you. "You won't come with me?" He looked like a deer caught in your car's headlights. You compared his current look with the void ironic silent that greeted you the first time.

          "I mean...I am coming. I have tickets to see Ryunjin and Yuna perform. I didn't know if you would like to stick with us" 

          "Yes, please" he replied instantly, probably imagining himself alone in the large crowd and recoiling. 

          "Sure. Wear something nice though! No hoodie! And for the love of God, no sweatpants!" You cried out, well aware of his usually fashion choices. He always looked comfy though, you like his style but he had to dress to impress for the festival.

           He stayed quiet in reaction to your request, mumbling under his breath 'what's wrong with my sweatpants' and 'wouldn't do that' but the rest of the session rolled smoothly without interruptions and talking about Voldemorts. 

        You were running as much as your heeled legs could muster. Of course you were late..but it wasn't your fault! If only those damn customers didn't come in last minute, maybe you would have time to go shower and get ready like a normal person.  

      Your phone vibrated in your hand, no wonder the others were searching for you. You answered the call not looking at the name on your screen. "I am coming!" You panted. 

      "I am waiting by the front entrance" a deep voice answered, taking you by surprise.

      "Seungmin?" You called, unsure. 

      "Yeah. Now come on" he said and hung up.

      You gathered your strength and ran the remaining distance. As you reached the entrance you looked around, you tried to locate him. You found him by the door, a lean body waiting for you. He had heard your advice. Black slacks, a simple white T-shirt underneath and a grey coat adored his frame. He looked put together and a perfect image of a boyfriend. You jogged lightly towards him. "Hey! You look nice. 100% boyfriend material" you complimented. 

       He shyly smiled at you and cocked his head inside. "Come Yuqi saved us seats. What took you so long?" He questioned as he turned to walk to the theater.

        "Some customers came last minute and I couldn't leave. I never have gotten ready that quickly" you laughed, avoiding bodies that were threatening to crush you. He took your forearm and guided you to your seats. 

        "It's okay." he comforted you. 

        You looked up amused and surprised. "I never thought that the Kim Seungmin would tell me it's okay to be late" you teased. 

        He huffed and lead you to the seats, where Yuqi and Jisung awaited you while discussing the music he had produced for one of the acts. You waved at them and settled on your seat, readying yourself for the spectacle. And you were just on time. You were amazed by the elegant lines of the dancers and the sharp moves, that were enhanced by the booming sound of the bass. The couples, that were twirling on stage, stole your breath and the solo performances were equally enchanting. 

        "Aren't they so cool?" You whispered to Seungmin, feeling bad that he was singled out. You were sitting between him and his friends so he stayed mostly quiet, except when he replied to your humorous comments. 

        "Yeah, I couldn't do that in a million years" he agreed, still captivated by the performance. All too soon the performances were over and the curtains fell. 

        You stretched, pulling yourself out of the uncomfortable seat and nodding to Seungmin "Come on! Let's go and give our congratulations to the 'chef'" you joked as you pulled him up.  "Yuqi we will catch up with you outside,ok?" She nodded her consent and dragged Jisung away, possibly to get some food. So you turned to your own companion who waited you patiently..not that he had an other choice as he didn't know the backstage as you did. "Come on lover boy, let's go to your ballerina"

        He grimaced but complied, following you into the dark backstage. You turned and turned until you catch a glimpse of Soojin. Then you promptly stopped and turned to him, fixing his clothes and fussing over him. He tried to avoid your touch but seeing you not giving up, he simply gave up. You fixed his hair as well, passing a hand threw them and perfecting each straw so they framed his face beautifully. "Okay. You got this" you said pushing him lightly to the door. 

        "Wait! You are not coming?!" he said, panic filling his eyes as a hand raised to clutch your wrist.

        "No! You go and tell her she's beautiful and if she wants to hang out after the show" 

        He opened his mouth to argue, but you pushed with more force and he stumbled into the room. The noise all around the place didn't exactly help you to listen in on their conversation, so a few minutes passed and you didn't know if that was a good sign or a bad one. But the door suddenly opened and Seungmin crossed the border throwing a careless 'I will see you around' over his shoulder. After the door closed though, he clutched his heart and let out a troubled sign. Immediately you were on his face.

        "How did it go? What did you say to her? She didn't want to come to the walk?" You buzzed, shifting your weight, almost circling around him.

         "Can you calm down for a moment?" He said, tugging at his collar "She said thank you and that she appreciates that I came. She said that she has plans but she will see me around in the coffee shop." 

         "Such a shame.I expected her to go with you." you pouted, disappointed. You had to fix him up in order to continue with this deal. You casted a glance towards him, to find him watching the space across you. You followed his gaze and located a blonde figure lounging there. Eric, who probably came to give his own congratulations. 

         "Maybe I can get her a cup of coffee when I see her again?" He quietly mumbled, gaze not straying from Eric's figure. 

         "Yeah" you agreed, eyes stuck in that direction too. But quickly you shook yourself out of your stupor. "Since you are free how about a stroll around the festival? I wanna go to the waffle station. I heard they are to die for" you whistled, already imagining the sweet chocolate melting in your mouth.

         He looked down on the floor for a beat, until you nudged him playfully. He met your stare but the discouraged look didn't leave him. 

         "You don't have to look down. You played your cards and lost. It's okay. There will be other opportunities. Now come with me" you took a hold of his jacket, gently moving him towards the exit. 

       He didn't say anything but moved along. 

       Once outside you were contemplating where to go. The food stands where a must and you voice that.

        "Okay. Plan." You said, turning to your companion who seemed equally as lost as you. "I wanna stop by the food stands. I heard this year they have a theme about foods around the world. Other than that I have no clue what is there" 

        "Umm okay. We can stop by. Not something spicy though. I can't really eat it" he said, not really here. He looked dazed at the festival. 

        You looked up at him, squinting. "Where do you wanna go?" 

        He still looked lost. Maybe he had been more hurt than you thought. Well you could distract.

        "Seungminnie!" you whined, hoping to distract him. And it worked by the distasteful scoff that took over his face. 

        "Don't call me that" he puffed and strode to whichever direction his feet took him. Hopefully for you, to the food section. 

        "Why?" Giggling, you took a look around. You were currently to the craft section. You marveled at the things that the student body managed to put together "But seriously what do you like to do? I never heard you mentioning hobbies" 

        "I like to take pictures. I took some nice shots at the park" he said, quietly.

        "Ohh that's how you knew about the park! Show me later some. That's really cool" you returned. "And? What else?" you questioned. 

        "I like baseball" he answered simply.

        "Oh! Oh! Which team?" You asked as your attention was snatched from a very nice pair of earrings to him. 

        "SK Wyverns" he replied, hesitantly. "You like baseball?" Suddenly focusing on you, you knew it was rare for women to like sports but you didn't know if you feel offended by his surprise.

        "Nahh my old man watches it so I know a couple of teams. He isn't a fan of that one though" you commented.

        "Which one he likes?"he asked, intrigued. 

        "Something heroes" you said, tapping your chin. You couldn't remember their name for the life of you!

        "Kiwoom Heroes! Over the Wyverns! Really now?!" He exclaimed, eyes wide and bewildered at your father's preferences. The scrunching of his nose betrayed his true dislike towards the team.

       "Hey don't tell it to me! Tell him that!" You joked as the sparkly earrings stole your attention again. The blue sparkling light caught your attention, the gold only enhancing their beauty. You shook your head. You weren't here to buy jewelry. You were here to eat. 

       "What do you like to do?" He asked as he took in his surroundings too. He looked more relaxed now, hands crossed at the back, head moving wherever to take in all of the stations. 

        "I don't have really the time to spare. If I do.. I guess a movie or some drinks with friends." You never really were into something particular. A simple time could be a good time too. 

         "Yeah I noticed. How come you are always working? Don't you want some time of?" He asked, examinating you more now.

         "Yeah it would be. But I need the money. And besides I stir up enough trouble when I don't have time in my hands. Could you imagine me with time to spare?" You raised your eyebrows at an alarming pace to empathize the fact. He scoffed, clearly amused.

       "God no. I wouldn't like to see that!" He laughed behind his hand. 

       "Exactl-" you started but an aroma stole your attention. A chocolatey rich aroma, that came from the stand ahead. "Seungmin, the sweets!" You exclaimed and thrusted forward, literally dragging him along. 

         "On the other hand.. with your limited attention span how bad could it be?" He sassed, but turned towards the chocolatey dough. "We will take two" he said to the boy in the cashier. 

        ��You reached in your bag to take out your purse, but you noticed Seungmin taking out double the amount that was required and give it to the cashier. "Hey! What are you doing? I can pay for mine!" you pouted. 

         "Too late!"he replied, having already paid and grabbed the sweets. You took your own while he took a bite from the dough. His eyes widened comically and he pointed at it with his mouth full. You laughed, but your reaction was very much the same as his when you took your first bite. 

        "I will pay for the next round" you said as you started your rounds again. This time heading towards the games. 

         "Sounds good" he said, the desert on his hands half way eaten. Men you thought, they could eat anything within seconds. 

         You wondered around for a bit. You tried the trivia game they hosted, you were tremendously bad at it while Seungmin tremendously good. You tried the maze they made up by cardboards and some other poorly made materials, but you both had a good sense of direction and got out pretty easily. One look at the karaoke stand had you both running for the hills and you ended up in front of an other food stand. But to the bad luck of Seungmin, the spices didn't sit right with him so here he was gulping water as if his life was depending on him.

       As you waited for him to calm his taste buds down, you were looking around. You spotted something in the far corner, a enormous cube, painted pink but the color was peeling away revealing the grey mass underneath. But none the less you jumped and shook Seungmin, pointing aggressively at the photo booth. "Let's go take some pictures" 

       "Now?!" he coughed, still red in the face. "I am dying!" 

       You looked at him and dead serious you replied "Well..die later" 

       He looked at you perplexed, but once again he let himself be dragged by you. So you got in first and patted the space by your side, which he dutiful filled. You chose a simple frame and a playful one, that one  he frowned upon. But you ignored him and passed an arm around him, squishing yourself into his arms in order to get into the frame. You feel him stiffen momentarily so you quickly looked up. You were a little too close for comfort, you could almost count his eyelashes. He looked.. pretty from this close. His eyes big, looking down at you slightly more wide than normal. His skin was so smooth it seemed like marble. 

       "Sorry" You said, as you shifted away, giving him more space to breathe.

       "Um..it's okay. Shall we?" he said and faced the poor quality camera again, so you leaned in (not too close) and stroke a ridiculous pose with your eyes crossed and tongue out. You turned as soon as the sound ticked of and saw Seungmin poker faced behind you. 

       "Come onn. Humor me" you teased. So he did. He brought his hand over his face in a cute v pose. You gleefully turned around in a similar pose. For your last click you just smiled at the camera, leaving Seungmin to fend on his own. You soon paid for two copies and left the booth. As you were handing Seungmin his own, you heard your familiar ringtone pierce the air. Your phone, you realized. So you opened your bag, manically searching for it, finding it at the bottom of your bag and breathlessly answered. 

       "Y/N!" A raspy voice boomed through the speaker. 

       "Yuqi" you cheered. 

       "We are at Tony's. Fancy coming?"she shouted into the line so you can hear her above the music and the noise. "Jisung is with me. And we bumped into Minho too. If you are still with Seungmin stop by!"

       "Roger that."you said and you hung up. You turned to your tutor, who was observing whoever was left at the fair.

       "Yuqi is with Jisung and Minho at Tony's. Wanna go?" You asked as you began to descend the stairs, that lead to the front entrance of the school.

       "An unlikely combination." he noted as he strolled right beside you. The descend was supposed to be easy but your heeled boots hurt your feet now and the breeze was getting stronger for your liking, lightly blowing your hair into your face. 

       "What can I say?" you said as you tried to get your locks away from your face. "You wanna come?" 

       He stayed quiet for a while. Gazing at the remaining tents that the students were scruffing to pick up, so they can party the night away. 

       "Yeah. I will come. For a little while" he replied at last, focusing on you. 

       You smiled at him, strangely happy your new friend decided to join you. So you made your way to the bar.

 With Seungmin by your side.

And your heart beating abnormally loud in your chest.

     It was a slow day in the cafe.

     Wooyoung and you were absent-mindedly cleaning, while talking about your weekend plans. The flow of people was steady, close to none at the time, so you tried to get the shop ready for the next shift. You looked over the supplies you had gathered. Cups? Check. Coffee? Check. Lids? Check. What was missing? You thought as you skimmed the shelves. Oh! The straws! 

    "Wooyoung! Do we have any straws over there?" You called, hand wandering inside the low cupboard in order to feel around for any stray sets. 

    He lowered himself to see into the other supply cupboard, with a quick look he confirmed your thoughts. "Nope!" 

     You grumbled under your breath. "Going to grab some from the back!" You called as you headed to the back room, where your supplies were stored.

    It was not a big room, storage shelves decorated every wall and it had no window nor any other form of natural lighting, except from the tiny bare bulb above your head. You switched it on and took a look around, trying to locate the troublesome straws. In the end you found them on the highest shelf of the stock room on the far right corner. 

 Whose brilliant idea was this? 

  No one in the coffee shop could boast about their height so the supplies usually where at a reasonable height for you. Except these darn straws! 

      "For fuck's sake.!" you spat out as you dragged the small ladder behind the door to help you up. You climbed it easily and took hold of the straws. But in your haste to finish your task, you knocked over a box.

        You blew a breath out and climbed back down. You let the packet of straws fall from your grasp and hosted the medium sized box in your arms. You climbed the ladder quickly, the box obscuring your vision. You placed the merchandise in the very edge of the shelf and pushed it with as much strength as you could. But as it seemed you needed to hit the gym sooner than later as your strength was proving not to be enough. You pushed even harder going on you tippy toes to get the box into a safer position and then you heard it. You heard the sound before your eyes caught up.

 The awful sound of the ladder tipping. Suddenly your vision tipped, just as the ladder did and you were falling. You thrashed your hands out in hopes of softening your fall, but it was of no use. You landed on the floor on your side, with an intense pain piercing your left ankle. 

         You sucked your teeth in response to the pain travelling up your leg. Fuck! That was exactly what you didn't need right now. You tried to get up and put some pressure on your leg only to stumble and nearly fall flat on the floor again. 

         Desperate situations required desperate solutions "Wooyoung!" You wailed loud enough for the whole store to hear. And when you didn't get an immediate response you wailed even louder. Till the sound of a pair of feet, running to you, was heard. 

 The door was thrown open and a dramatic I'm gasp cut through the air. "Y/N! What happened? Are you okay?" He fretted as he attempted to lift you up.

 Key word. 

Attempted. 

    As Wooyoung lifted you up, you put pressure on your bad leg almost falling down again. "Ouch!" you hissed out, grinding your teeth in order not to whine out loud. This time more carefully, Wooyoung lifted you and kept you close at his side so he can manage your weight. 

         "What happened?!" He asked incredulously as he moved you to the staff room.

       "I fell from the ladder. I must have twisted my ankle, it fucking hurts when I try to stand" you pouted, looking down at your feet. It didn't look swollen nor bruised. Maybe you had gotten lucky and it was just a strain.

         After a quick visit to the doctor, courtesy of your very fretty boss, he confirmed that you had indeed gotten lucky and that it was a sprain that. Rest was prescripted and you should be fine in three days time. 

    Your boss was overjoyed, that she didn't have to pay you medical leave or worse. She even happily offered you a ride back home as you couldn't quite move easily. You thanked her, truly grateful that you wouldn't have to walk all the way back to your apartment by yourself. 

   Once you were in the apartment you let yourself ungracefully plop down on your bed and sign. This incident would take you back a few days. Days you could spend working.. studying...doing everything else besides sitting on your ass. 

         You heaved a sign of exaggeration and pulled out your phone. You had a lesson with Seungmin today and you would have to cancel. You couldn't go to the library like this and he had made clear that he would not go out of his way to come to your apartment.

 You bit your lips, deciding what to write. A simple and nice message would do. 

 A skull emoji? Really? But given his aloof personality it oddly suited him. You shrugged it off and decided rest and a bowl of warm food would be the best for you. 

    Two episodes in your new series and your telephone was ringing. You felt around your covers for your phone and once your hand come in contact with it, you answered without a second thought. 

       "Hello?"  

       "Hello" A gruff voice greeted. 

    You sat up, suddenly more aware. You weren't expecting a call from him."Seungmin?"

       "Yes, it's me" he confirmed quietly.

       You bit your lips. Have you forgotten to write something on your text? Had you forgotten your homework? "Can I help you?"

       "I heard that you fell today and require rest. Is this the reason you cancelled our lesson today?" He asked, dare you say, concerned. He didn't sound like he was craving a path on his room out of worry but he cared enough to ring you up. It was oddly sweet of him.

       "Yeah.. the doctor suggested rest. Like 3 days top" you said, absentmindedly, but soon paused. "Does this change your programme?" You fretted, hands going through your hair, succeeding only in messing it up further.

        "Not much but.. We can have our lesson tomorrow.. At your house" he quietly proposed.

        He had made sure not to include your home at the possible study places. Maybe it made him uncomfortable..was it out of concern for you? The surprises didn't ceased. After a brief hesitation you asked "Are you sure?"

        "Yeah. It's not like you are bored walking to the library. You are injured. I am not that cruel to make you walk till there" he said in astonishment. 

      You suppose he was not. "I really appreciate it, Seungmin. Thank you"  you whispered.

       A humm was heard from the other line before asking "Same hour tomorrow?" 

        "Yeah. Yeah. Bye" You muttered before hanging up. 

        Huh. You fully expected him to take advantage of his free day. Instead here he was calling you to ask you if you were okay and arranging tomorrow's date.

 He was nicer than you expected. 

You felt warmer than before.

    The buzzer let you know that Seungmin had arrived.

    With a grunt you stood on your good leg and hopped over to your door to buzz him in. Leaving the door ajar so he could get in, you hopped back to your kitchen table, where you had laid your books.  

    You could hear his steps as he made his way to your apartment, the instructions you had provided guiding him. You heard him pause outside your door, unsure whether to enter or not, based on it's open state. You giggled and called him over "I left it open for you! Come on in!" 

    He stepped over the threshold and inspected your house. Well... house was a bit of a stretch. Your apartment was rather small, but had a homey and cozy feeling to it. The walls were painted a beige that didn't express you, but it was a requirement of your landlord.     

 You had tried to make it better by hanging artwork all over the apartment. Some where of land scapes you enjoyed, some of quotes that you favoured and some of your close friends and family. Your couch, that also served as your bed, was placed against the wall facing your spacious wardrobe and a bookcase that took way too much time to build.

     Your kitchen was small, some of its wooden surface were begging to submit to time, but you used it well. Plenty of fake plants were decorating it, giving it a splash of color that it needed. Once upon a time you tried to decorating with living breathing plants but... your skills proved not to be up for the challenge. 

      Your bathroom completed the wonderful set. A small white thing that consisted the only other door in the apartment, besides the threshold.

     Seungmin stood still at your threshold, unsure how to move in your space. You shook your head and guided him to leave his things by your couch and join you. He slowly did and approached as fast as a platypus. 

      You got up, careful not to apply much pressure on your bad leg and asked the awkward boy "Coffee?" 

      He looked you as if in thought. "Are you supposed to be standing?" 

      You shrugged, already hopping over to your counter. "I sprained it, I didn't break it so I should be fine. Want some cookies?" You asked, not bothering to turn to him as you were focused on the task. 

      "No, thank you" he said as he watched you make him coffee "Are you sure you're okay? Want some help?"he pressured.

      You did turn to look at him then. He was attentively looking at you from his seat, alert as he expected you to fall over.

      "What did Wooyoung said to you?" You joked as you leaned back. 

       "He said that you fell from a ladder. He didn't heard the crash, but he heard you shouting for help" he parroted back immediately, brows furrowing. 

       "Always the drama queen" you mumbled under your breath, but the boy heard you letting a chuckle at your words. "I am fine. Really. But thanks for the concern and thoughtfulness" 

       He looked at you oddly before turning you his back and reaching inside of his backpack to pull out the necessary items. "Minho had injured his leg last year. It took him a while to recover. He had it bad. But looking at you now.. you do seem fine. So finish that coffee and come here. We should begin" 

       "Yes sir. Right away sir!" You saluted. A small smile your only reply. 

     "Hey Puppy" 

     "Do NOT call me that" he stated, not even bothering to acknowledge you. You heard his sister calling him that over the phone, ever since you haven't missed the chance to call him that. He hated it, of course.

     "Say...You said you have read the SKZflix series right?"you wondered aloud and that was enough to catch his attention. He slightly turned his body towards you and stopped typing on his laptop. 

      "Yeah..why?" He asked, now giving you his full attention. He lifted his hand to pull his glasses away, rubbing his eyes tiredly. He needed more rest.

      "Well, you know that they are making a movie-"you started but was rudely interrupted.

      "Obviously" he sassed, scrunching his nose at you.

      You rolled your eyes at him. "Well it comes out next Friday. And I was wondering if you wanna..maybe.. go?"you mumbled the last part.

      He blinked in surprise. The last month and a half it was not strange for our groups to merge here and there. In fact, you have spend several evenings with your grumpy tutor and his sassy group. They now visit your workplace a lot more, even when Jisung has a day off. Yuna, Ryunjin and Minho, being all dance majors, have a lot of classes together and often end up having lunch together while the rest of you fill the table.You and Seungmin usually come together because your hours matched and your buildings are close. Jisung arrives always fashionably late and Wooyoung pops out here and there.

     Even though you spend a lot of days together, be it at school or outside of it, you have never hangout alone together. But it wasn't like you were never alone. But, never, neither you nor Seungmin have made such plans. But as soon as you saw the posters, your first thought was him. 

      Seungmin and you often talked about the movies and books you enjoyed and, to your surprise, your tastes matched. When you shared your favourite series you didn't expect the enthusiastic reaction. It seemed he was a hug fan as well. So it was only natural to think of him.

        "Sure" he said, after his initial surprise. "What time is the show?" He asked as a hand came to rub his nape. 

         "I don't know. I simply saw the posters. We can swing by after to see, if you are up to it" you said, fumbling with the paper in front of you. You couldn't keep still for some reason. 

         ".. Yeah, let's do that" he said, giving you a small smile.

   Days flew by quickly. Tomorrow was the screening for the movie and you were so excited. You contemplated dressing up as the main character, but you quickly disregarded the idea, thinking about the turned up noses and stares you would get. 

    You were on your way out when you felt your phone buzz and the familiar song filled the atmosphere. You fished it out of your pocket and checked the caller. Puppy, it read. 

    "Hel-" You squeaked as you balanced your phone in your shoulders to lock the door. 

    "She asked me out!" Seungmin shouted through the phone. His tone bright and happy, as if he had won the lotto. 

     You paused your motions, taking better hold of your phone. She asked him out? Soojin? When? What has you missed?

     "Soojin asked you out..?"you slowly repeated, trying to focus.

     "Yes! We were talking since the festival you know! She said that there is a photography exhibit at the center tomorrow so she invited me to go! She said she felt bad that she couldn't go with me when I asked her after the performance" he eagerly continued, happy with the date he scored. 

     "Tomorrow?"you asked as if you were lagging. Tomorrow was your movie. 

     "Yes! I know I told you I would go with you to the SKZflix... Do you think we can reschedule? I would own you a big one" he rushed to say, explaining himself. 

     You bit your lip hard enough to draw blood. They have known each other for nearly 2 months and they decide to go out now? Now that you had plans to watch the premiere? A sudden itch on your skin, your hands couldn't keep still. But what could you say? No?

     "..yeah. That's alright Seungmin. I mean- it's a bummer that you'll.. miss the movie. But- umm have fun at your date!"you rumbled, shifting uncomfortably. 

     "Thank you! We can still watch it together at my house some time later. Minho bought a pair of new speakers so he can practice at home. They help him to 'hear the music better' or whatever that means. They have amazing sound though, I give him that" he continued, happiness clear in his voice. On the other hand, you were distracted. You barely managed to step away from your building, answering with hums and acknowledging him when necessary. When you had crossed over half the distance to your work, you decided that you couldn't keep up anymore.

      "...my partner didn't know this, so the teacher said-" you hesitated but you cut off his grumpy voice, rather rudely. His just wanted to speak about his day, but you wanted none of that at the moment. You wanted some quiet.

      "Seungmin I am at work now. We should hang up." You stated, tone flat. You prayed that he couldn't hear the noise around you through the speakers.

       "Oh..okay.. I will talk to you later" He paused briefly. You usually let him talk longer, you tried not to interrupt him when he was ranting. Not today, you guessed 

       "Yeah. Later" you mumbled the last part and cut off the connection. You kind of stood there for a moment.

 Breathing in and then out.

 It would be a long day today. 

You could just feel it.

        You ended up seeing the premiere with Hong Joong, who was available and a big fan as well. He had recently ended his something with Dami and he was in the mood for company. That's how you ended up in a restaurant after the movie, happily drinking your night away. 

      The next day Seungmin particularly skipped over to you, all smiles and giggles. You almost didn't want to ask about last night so you didn't. You sat at your usual desk and dived into the math problems. You had ignored the efforts he made to start small talk, choosing instead to focus on the numbers in front of you. 

      You managed to stay quiet a whole hour and a half before your curiosity got the better of you. You turned towards him, a little hesitant and not looking at him, you asked "How did it go with Soojin yesterday?"

    He paused his typing and turned to you with a small smile. "Good. We went to the fair and then we grabbed something to eat. We had a great time"

     You slowly looked up to the desks in front of you. "That's great, Seungmin. I hope it goes well" you murmured. You felt a little funny today, distracted, head above the clouds. It must have shown because you felt a hand being placed on your shoulder. You turned, dazed, towards him. He had a smile, a different one this time, as if he was asking you if you were alright. He voiced his concern soon after. "Are you alright?" He asked slowly. 

     You met his stare for what it seemed like the first time this evening. His eyes were full of concern for you. You felt bad that your moody ass was making him concerned, so you plastered a small smile and answered.

"I am alright. Just a little blue"

      He looked at you for a beat. "Do you want to..maybe watch the SKZflix together? I have the place to myself. Sorry for cancelling last minute yesterday" he regretfully said, his head lowering this time. 

       You looked him over and the first thing you thought, he was feeling guilty. You don't know what he was guilty about..but you oddly appreciated the thought. So you gave him a small smile "it's a deal" you chuckled.

Days flew by in a rapid pace.

Life was normal, if not a little bit hectic. Your days was full of classes, work and Seungmin. You woke up, went to uni, you ate, you went to work, on the days you didn't work you had your lessons with Seungmin. To say the least, you were exhausted. 

And it was shown clear as day. Either by your ... irritable attitude or by your awful appearance.

     "Girl you look awful. Like I-spend-all-week-doing-all-nighters-and-have-been-drinking-only-energy-drinks" she put out while she pitifully looked down at you. 

Upon hearing her, you lifted your head and looked her dead in the eyes. "What kind life have you been living?" You returned, tiredly.

      "One that doesn't require me to live like a zombie. When was the last time you rested or went out like a normal person?"she inquired while taking a long sip of her already dried up frapuccino, making your temples throb even harder. 

       When was the last time? You picked yourself up and thought about it. "Like.. two weeks ago? I watched a movie with Seungmin" you concluded.

     Yuqi raised her eyebrow at that, but didn't comment. Instead she wondered, tone full of promises "Can you take off the next Friday and Saturday?"

      You threw a glance at her. "I can run it by boss. Why?" You asked. 

      Her eyes were almost glowing. "It's party time" 

     "Say it again"

   You winced when his voice reached your end of the line. You weren't even asking for a cancellation! "Puppyy" you let out a long whine. 

     "I thought you said you were on schedule, Y/N" 

     "I am. I am just...tired, Seungmin. I am running around since September with little to no time to rest" you mumbled as you run your hand over your face, trying to wake yourself up a little. "I am not asking you to cancel...just move it to the next day?" You asked, hopefully.

     Grumbles could be heard over the line. "Fine, yes" A brief pause and then "Are you ok?" He asked, a little above a whisper. 

       You let out a breath. "Yeah, I...I choice that. I just want to rest for 2 days." You concluded.

      "Okay. I guess I will see you on Sunday. Don't sleep in" he warned, knowing full well your post drinking behavior by now. He had woken you up many times by now.

     "I won't!" You chuckled  "As for the Sunday part. I have a proposition.." you trailed off with a smirk on your face.

 "It's freaking cold!" Yuqi whined as she stepped out of the car.

       You also got out of the Uber you had to catch because of the stinging cold. 

      You were already regretting the dress you chose to wear, even if your knee high boots were covering most of your legs, the cold was hard to beat and was freezing your exposed legs to the bone. You hurried towards the entrance of the club you had agreed to meet with the rest of the group.

    As you neared the club two loud laughs could be heard from the queue, two laughs you could recognize anywhere due to the long hours you spend together. Jisung and Wooyoung stood in the queue joking, quite loudly as Minho and Seungmin stood there, nodding and smiling at the goofy jokes that were thrown at them. You were pleasantly surprised by their presence, you were sure that when you had proposed the idea to your grumpy tutor the answer would be shift and... negative. 

    The both had donned their winter coats so you couldn't see exactly what they were wearing, but you catch sight of a collar picking from the neck of Seungmin's coat. He had pushed his hair back and now his face were all angles and sharp lines. After months of being in his presence you still couldn't believe how handsome he was. 

      "Hi!" Yuqi cheered, capturing the groups attention. Even if she hadn't greeted them, she would've captured the attention - the pink iridescent dress she wore left no other choice, but to look at it. Yuna and you followed closely behind her, huddling in the queue along them. You exchanged pleasantries with everyone and a quick hug with Woo and took your place next to Seungmin. 

       "Well we'll look who we have here!" You puffed, your breath shown clearly in front of your face - almost like white smoke. You could feel your nose running, possibly ruining your make up and the crispy wind slapping your face.

    He clicked his tongue and gestured with his chin to Minho. "He dragged me. Said something about having fun." He huffed and puffed like a child that was being dragged to a family gathering by their parents. 

       "Oh come on, you grandpa! We will have plenty of fun! You'll see!" You said, jumping in place to keep yourself warm. You saw him briefly looking down at your attire and your legs before tearing his gaze to your face. You wondered if the flush on his face was from the likes of you or the wind. But you didn't have time to dwell on it or question him as the bouncer ushered you all in.

     Stepping inside, smoke filled your lungs and colourful lights blinded you. The warehouse, that was turned into a club, was full of swaying young bodies that cheered and drunk the night away. A anxious waiter showed to your table, that were basically two stands pushed together and certainly couldn't accommodate your large group but you hadn't had it in you to complain, you simply dumped your things into the tables and catch the nearest waiter to take your orders. 

      After your third drink you found yourself on the dance floor in between Yuqi and Wooyoung. With Wooyoung's hands on your waist and your own embracing Yuqi around her shoulders, you threw your head back as you let the music that played consume you. Giggles and smoke surrounded you as you let your hazy gaze wondered and it fell straight to a pair of moody eyes that watched you. You untangled yourself from the chaos that were your friends and you lightly treaded towards Seungmin.

     He somehow managed to find a chair into the chaos, which he dragged to your table and sat there, his first glass of the night still in his hand half empty. You reached him and threw an arm over his shoulders, his sitting position making things easier. He side glanced you but didn't react otherwise, choosing to bring his glass to his lips. 

     "Seungminnie why are you brooding?" You sing songed as you shook him playfully. Everything had a pleasant haziness that you were enjoying, even the smoke that was suffocating before started to gently caressing you and the lights just made everything prettier. Especially the boy beside you.

      "I am not brooding" he scoffed as he turned slightly towards you. "I am simply not enjoying myself. This isn't my scene" 

     "Well how are you gonna enjoy yourself when you are sitting here alone?" You pouted and tagged at his black shirt, noticing he had rolled up to his elbows due to the the heat in there. A ridiculous idea popped into your head, making weirdly sense into your clouded mind then. "Come dance with me!" 

       He gave you a look and turned away again  "I don't wanna dance. Go back to Wooyoung and Yuqi" he said, not looking at you. His focus was on the dance floor and you fleetingly thought that maybe Soojin was in there, if he knew she come here often and the only reason he was here was to catch her or if he was simply watching by the sidelines again, but you shook your head dismissing the thought. Instead you stepped in front of him, effectively cutting his view of the crowd and making him look at you. 

        You tugged gently at his hands, not altering a word, you smiled and nodded to the floor and he got up willingly. Rocking on your uncomfortable heels, you looked at him for a moment and replied "But I wanna dance with you" 

        He also gazed at you for a moment, signed before giving a brief nod. You slipped your hand in his, for fear he will change his mind, and tugged him at the dance floor . You found a space by the sidelines that wasn't as crowded as the centre of the floor and started swaying away to the Rihanna song that blasted through the speaker. He stood there swaying awkwardly, even from your tipsy point of view. So you drew closer and threw your hands around his shoulders, making him match your tempo. He freezed briefly before you felt hands slowly cradling your waist and hips, which you were moving with the music and body mimicking your gestures. You looked up at him throwing a smile, hoping you were helping him relax and enjoy himself.

     He was looking down at you with a unrecognisable look. His brows was furrowed and his eyes lidded. His eyes looked more smothering and hot than normal under the red lights. So you did what your hazy mind told you and stepped even closer, hands tangling in the hair on his nape. The song, as if to prevent you, changed to something quicker and fun making you break the intense eye contact and swing wildly with him. 

       The songs were changing from pop to old rocks to rap music you both didn't know well but you didn't move from your spot, continuing dancing with each other. Tem songs have pasted until the DJ settled to a slow piece, that allowed tou to catch your breaths. You were both smiling, making grimaces and weird dance moves to entertain yourselves.            You were once again in each other's embrace, moving slowly. You tip toed to whisper in his ears "See? Aren't you having fun?"

    His breath fanned your jaw and neck as he draw even more near and whispered "Yeah" 

      You turned your head to look at him and realized you were inches apart. You could see the lights reflected in his eyes, a swirling mess of colours, much alike to what you were feeling now. His sharp features looked painfully good and mixed with the smell of his musky cologne, it made you more dizzy than the drinks you previously had. His lips, unreasonably red and inviting, parted lightly and only then you realized you were looking at his mouth. You pulled your gaze to his eyes, only to see his gaze lifting up to meet yours, painfully obvious that he followed the same path as you. You could feel the distance between your lips getting smaller and his hands holding you just a bit tighter as you both moved closer to shorten the distance-

        "Y/N!" A loud voice pulled you out of your daydream. You took a step back out of Seungmin's arms and turned to the direction of the call, only to see a pink clad figure approaching. "I looked all over for you! Come with me for a moment, please?" She wrapped herself around your form, batting her glittery eyelashes at you. You laughed and nodded, casting a glance at your partner.

      "Go ahead. I will go order a drink" Seungmin said as he passed a hand through his already disheveled hair. Before you could answer him, your friend started dragging you away. So you called over your shoulder to wait for you by the bar, by the smile he sent over his shoulder, you took it as a sign of consent.

      You waved your way through the crowd, which was getting larger as the night went by and found the toilet tucked away in a corner. The line, fortunately, wasn't unfathomably big so you leaned by the wall awaiting your turns.

       "Girl what was that on the dance floor?" Yuqi inquired as she came to stand in front of you. Not a sight of sweat on her skin, despite the way she was jumping on the dance floor. You sure you looked like a mess.

      "What?" You asked as you looked over the tacky bathroom, from the papers that littered the ground to the overflowing baskets by the sinks. 

        "Don't what me. You and Seungmin, of course. I swear you were ready to kiss, if I hadn't walked in" she gassed, leaning even more towards you. "Did I do something stupid?" 

     A brief irritation passed over you, before shaking your head to clear it from the alcohol you consumed. "It wasn't like that. We were just talking, maybe it looked weird from your angle. Besides he likes someone else." You dismissed as you moved deeper into the bathroom. 

         "Are you sure? You looked pretty comfy to me." She questioned, giving you her pooch as she reached an empty bathroom stall. 

          "I mean.. yeah. We are close" You answered, facing the mirror. Your make up wasn't totally ruined, but you could see a faint shine to your face due to the heat and all the dancing you were doing. You quickly passed your hands through your locks, ruffling them just right. Before reaching into Yuqi's bag and reapplying the lipstick on your face. You didn't mind the slightly different shade. You closed it up and waited for your companion to exit the stall. Once she did exit and after a couple of 'are you sure' questions, you braved the crowd once again, reaching your table in a agonizing slow pace. 

       When you did arrive, you saw the lone figures of Seungmin and Minho at the table, the others were missing. Even after a quick scan of the dance floor you only managed to pinpoint a dancing Jisung and a Ryunjin chilling with a couple girlfriends' of hers. Wooyoung wasn't anywhere to be found, but you had learned better than to question that. 

      "Wanna have shots?" You asked. The buzz was going away and you couldn't have that, especially that early into the night. 

         "You already had 3 drinks"  Seungmin said, leaning in his chair once again. Minho sipped on his drink of choice but didn't give a negative reply yet, seemingly watching the scene unfold. 

            "Blasphemy! I only had two. Come on three shots!" You raved as you bounced, along with Yuqi, who you didn't have to get consent. 

"Yeah! Let's have some shots!" Her booming voice, parroted. 

         "One" he said, ignoring your pouty lips and puppy eyes. 

         "Two" you challenged, already making your way to the bar, giggling along the way with Yuqi. 

         Once you reached the bar, you waved the pretty bartender over and placed your orders. 4 shots of tequila. You gave the boys their own, noticing Seungmin looked at the glass like it was poison. You cheered, clinked your glasses and off you went to the dance floor, where you ended up in the arms of your handsome tutor. As the night went the one shot became two, and then three, and then four and then you lost count. The only thing that was on your mind was the music, the laughter and the arms that supported you. 

       Suddenly the world was twirling along with you and your eyes closed. When you opened your eyes again, darkness greeted you. You felt yourself moving but not really, and your head leaning on a surface, that was uncomfortable and digging on your cheek. You made to move but a warm voice told you not to and as a warm sensation racked your back, darkness took over again. 

      Your eyes fluttered open once again,but this time, light was hitting your face. 

      You groaned as the first thing you felt was a raging headache. How much did you drink? You opened your eyes only to see that you were in bed, blanket tightly wrapped around your frame in order to keep warm. How did you get home? You sat up, rubbing the sleep from your eyes and stretching your body. You could feel your legs killing you, even though you hadn't used them yet. You stepped on the ground to get up but a sudden groan from the floor spooked you. A body laid there, in between your spare blankets. Oh god...what have you done? 

       "You finally woke up?" A deep voice grunted, still laced with sleep. Seungmin?! He rose from the floor, wrapping the blankets around him and he moved onto the bed with a pained moan. "Move" 

      You pulled your body to the side, allowing him to climb better and lay down on your bed. His shirt was replace by one of your oversized hoodies that, no surprise there, fit him well enough, since they were huge on you. His hair was messy from sleep and his eyes half closed.

      "Seungmin? Why are you here?" You asked, but he was already in dreamland.

      You looked at him for a beat, trying to gather your thoughts. You remember dancing with him last night, cracking jokes and laughing.. and then nothing. You vaguely remember waking up to a moving vehicle, leaning on someone and you looked at the boy sleeping in your bed. Did something happened between you? No. Seungmin wasn't the type of guy to take advantage of you. Also, you had your clothes on and he was sleeping on the floor, you doubted that he was that gifted. 

     You got up, treading towards your bathroom. Your hair could be more of a mess, you decided, thanking yourself for straightening it last night. Your face was clean of make up, only a light shadow under your eyes from your mascara. So that meant you washed up last night. You now realized that you were dressed in your PJs and that you had no recollection of doing so or anything for that matter. Hell, you didn't even remember bringing Seungmin here. You washed up and went to your living room again.

      Seungmin was still peacefully sleeping in your bed and you felt bad waking him up, especially when he spent the night sleeping on the floor. You decided on making some coffee and breakfast. That would be sufficient for now. 

      You had just finished making the last bit of the french toast, when a grunt left your guest. You looked over and saw him, slowly sitting up and freezing when he realized that he was sleeping on your bed and not on the cold floor. 

      "Good morning" you saluted, from your seat in the kitchen table- already nursing a cup of hot coffee. "I made breakfast. Come to eat."  

     He slowly walked up to me and took a seat opposite of you. Either your toast looked really appetizing or he was really hungry, because he fell immediately on top of the plate and started devouring it. "Coffee?" You asked,  getting a positive grunt so you got up and  poured him a mug. You looked idly at the boy, eating your breakfast and hesitantly spoke up. "Seungmin? How did you end up here?" 

    He looked up from his feast and took a sip before he spoke. "You don't remember?" 

    "..No" you responded. 

He lifted his hand on your forehead, flicking it lightly. You blinked, rubbing the sore spot on your forehead "Ouch! Why was that?!" 

     "For the trouble you got me into. After you downed your first shot, you kept drinking. I tried to stop you but you slipped away. Mind you, surprisedly, stealthily for someone so drunk and downed more shots. Eventually it took a toll on you and you blackened out. I brought you here." He used his dad look, the look when you got a problem wrong. Squinting eyes, eyebrows drawn together and his left side of his lips slightly raised. 

     You cleared your throat in order to avoid the tension. "And how exactly you ended up staying over?" You quietly mumbled, now playing with your food. You expected the worst now. 

      He quietened for a moment before reaching to scratch his nape. "You... umm.. you were in a pretty bad condition and I didn't want to leave you alone. You threw up several times-" You closed your eyes, regretting your past actions. But quickly your eyes quirked over your place, looking for accidents.

       "No! No you managed to race to the bathroom. I didn't see anything, but I.. umm.. heard you. " he rushed to get out, explaining the situation. You mentally face palmed, of course you had and done that. You hanged your head in shame, not mustering enough courage to look at Seungmin at the eye. "Are you ok?"  

       You huffed, lifting your head only a little to look at him. His attention was on you, eyes full of worry. Who could blame him though? You would worry about you, if you were in his shoes. "Yeah.. I do that kind of often... if I have too much to drink. And the clothes?" 

       "You gave them to me." He said, pitching the sky blue hoodie he wore to show it off. "I almost thought you were cold stone sober when you exited. You gave me clothes and insisted for me to sleep on the bed."he laughed, making you hang your head even lower.

     "A guest should always take the bed."you mumbled even quieter than before. 

     "Yeah that was exactly what you said!" He laughed, your embarrassment clearly entertaining him. 

      "Puppy... " You said carefully, as you put your weight on your elbows on top of the table. He looked at you, now resigned at the shameful nickname and hummed. "My head is killing me.."

      "Serves you right" was the immediate response. Meanie.

      "Yes..but I don't know if I can concentrate like that-" you got out before he cut you off.

       "You can't concentrate either way. Now get to the point" he huffed, taking a sip of his coffee. 

 "Canwepleasenothavealessonandputonamovie?" You got out as quickly as you could, secretly hoping he wouldn't hear you and just agree. A girl could hope. 

     He didn't shut you down immediately, just looked at you with a strange expression. 

     "You don't have to fill it. It would be on me. Promise" you persuaded him further. 

      He looked at you some more, before nodding "What do you wanna see?" He said as he got up to put his plate on the sink. You grabbed the chance to go and get the laptop and prob it to the coffee table, stretching yourself on the still unmade bed. 

      "I started the show you proposed. It's good. I am on episode 4. Hey! Leave them! I will do it later" you called over your shoulder, hearing water running from the kitchen. 

     "You did? I told it was good!" He exclaimed, as he finished the dishes and took his respective place on the other side of the bed. 

     "Care for a rerun?" You wingled your brows.

      "Nah, put it on" and the rest of the day was spent there with idle talk and comments about this and that...

You could get used to that...

Next»

[jisungsdaydreamer]

Love Playlist | SERIES MASTERLIST

«GENERAL M.LIST» · «NAVIGATION» · «TALK TO ME»

SYNOPSIS A sweet collection of skz college au stories inspired by bts tracks 💕 (3/8) complete; can be read as standalones, but the stories are all connected!

CONTENTS

1. UGH! (Bang Chan)

Release Date: June 2nd, 2023 Pairing: Bang Chan x Fem!Reader Genre: college au, angst, fluff, enemies to lovers, forced proximity Warnings: swearing, mc has autism, misogynistic behavior (not Bang Chan), implications of ableism, bullying, short panic attack description Synopsis: Despite what everyone thinks, Christopher Bang is definitely not perfect. At least, not to you. After the election for Student Council President ends in an exact tie, you and Chris both end up as co-presidents, to your horror. But even though Chris is literally the bane of your existence, you try to remain professional and do your best to communicate with him only when absolutely necessary. But when circumstances force you together, you learn that maybe you and Chris aren’t as different as you thought.

2. MAKE IT RIGHT (Lee Know)

Release Date: July 24, 2023 Pairing: Lee Know x Fem!Reader Genre: college au, fluff, exes to lovers, angst Warnings: swearing, messy break-up, mc has a fear of the dark, mild haunted house/Halloween descriptions Synopsis: You and Minho are the “golden couple” of your university. Well, you were. After letting the pressures of college life get in the way of your relationship, you end in a messy breakup. However, you both share a lot of friends and it’s impossible to avoid each other, so you both ignore your lingering feelings for each other. But love works in strange ways, and now yours needs to be made right.

3. FAKE LOVE (Changbin)

Release Date: TBD Pairing: Changbin x Fem!Reader Genre: college au, fluff, fake dating, friends to lovers Warnings: TBA Synopsis: Growing up, you were always the black sheep of your family. You were never cute enough, or nice enough, or smart enough, and constantly singled out. Your family’s increased pressure on you to be better caused an uneasy rift between you. However, when you are invited to attend your sister’s wedding, you know you will never hear the end of it from your relatives if they find out you are still single. So, you end up taking your friend, Changbin, and he will pretend to be your date. But maybe your feelings for each other are not so fake after all…

4. BUTTERFLY (Hyunjin)

Release Date: TBD Pairing: Hyunjin x Fem!Reader Genre: college au, fluff, strangers to lovers, angst, hurt/comfort Warnings: TBA Synopsis: After a heart-fluttering encounter with an enigmatic boy at a friend’s party, you let go of your reservations and your friends’ warnings to pursue him. Hyunjin may seem like a charismatic, humorous person, but when with you, he literally and metaphorically draws stars around your scars. But such a passionate love at such a young age can be fleeting, like a butterfly. Is it worth the risk?

5. HOME (Han)

Release Date: May 7th, 2023 Pairing: Han x Fem!Reader Genre: college au, fluff, roommates to lovers, friends to lovers, mutual pining Warnings: mild swearing Synopsis: Jisung. Your roommate. Your best friend. The person you call when you need a ride home. The person who brings you ice cream when you’re sad. The person who you tried not to like, but failed anyway. So you bury your feelings. When the stress of impending exams doubles down, both you and Han must lean on each other even more to get through. But on one fateful night, everything changes.

6. BLACK SWAN (Felix)

Release Date: TBD Pairing: Felix x Fem!Reader Genre: college au, fluff, angst, grumpy/sunshine Warnings: TBA Synopsis: Felix is everything you’re not: happy, sociable, optimistic. You’re everything Felix isn’t: grumpy, quiet, pessimistic. You aren’t a bad person, but it’s the circumstances that you face that keep you from enjoying your life, and Felix is a constant reminder of what you don’t and can’t have. When your troubles reach a climax, Felix resolves to help you, and no amount of sassy comments or eye-rolls will deter him.

7. COFFEE (Seungmin)

Release Date: TBD Pairing: Seungmin x Fem!Reader Genre: college au, fluff, strangers to lovers Warnings: TBA Synopsis: Seungmin has never been a relationship person. And no, not even of the casual kind. He prefers independence, getting through college while working at his family’s coffee shop. One day, he’ll inherit the café and finally be able to thrive on his passion, but until then, he’ll keep his head down and work. His plans are thrown off when you breeze into the shop. His heart hurts watching you get stood up on every single date, but there is no way he’s smitten. It’s just customary to spend an extra ten minutes during the morning rush trying to pipe a creamer heart onto your coffee.

8. BOY IN LUV (I.N)

Release Date: TBD Pairings: I.N x Fem!Reader Genre: college au, fluff, unrequited love Warnings: TBA Synopsis: Of course on the one night you let loose, at your best friend’s birthday party, you get too tipsy and end up kissing Jeongin, the guy who sits behind you in your chemistry class. And what makes it worse? You know he has a crush on you, and you definitely do not reciprocate. But no matter how many times you reject him afterwards, Jeongin insists you have feelings for him. But there is no universe where you would have feelings for Yang Jeongin, or his gorgeous smile.

TAGLIST @chansburgah @hee0soo @hamburgers101 @ajxreads @hash2013 @pixigreen @ana-marais98 @ohish @anyamaris @chizumiyoshi @lilydaisyyy @lollloll9090 @jetblackbelle

If you’d like to join my taglist, click here!

♡ If you like my work, please consider giving me feedback in the form of reblogs, comments, and asks! ♡

📢 ©jisungsdaydreamer 2023 | All rights reserved. I do not condone translations or transfers of my work onto other platforms such as Wattpad, AO3, etc. My only platform. Acts of plagiarism are strictly prohibited.

[amara-mars]

Stray Kids Maknae line reaction to unexpected pets

Hyung ver.

pairing: maknae line x reader

genre: smau, idol au, humor, overall fluff

warnings: pet names, pregnancy scare but not really, reader calls hyunjin a slag (deserved)

notes: Comments and Reblogs are vv welcome!! enjoy! <3

More After The Cut

Jisung ( 한 지성 )

Felix ( 이 용복 )

Seungmin ( 김 승민 )

Jeongin ( 양 정인 )

Taglist

@sunnibearr

[slytherinshua]

[ 11:27pm ]

“You missed our date. Again.” You muttered, placing your bag down and discarding your shoes. He didn’t respond for a couple seconds, only making it harder for you to not get mad at him. 

It wasn’t even his fault. He didn’t have much control over his schedule, so who were you to get mad that it got changed last minute? You should be mad at his manager if anyone. Still, if there was a little more communication, then maybe you wouldn’t feel as though you were being left in the dark so often.

“Sorry… I’m sure you’re disappointed.” He sighed, voice sounding a bit rough. You wondered if he had lost his voice again from straining it too much.

“It gets a little more than just disappointing after the 4th time.” He didn’t respond and you glanced at him only to see him typing some message.

“You might as well be dating your manager. You spend more time texting them than you do texting me.” You said icily, already foreseeing you saying some things which you would regret later. But your brain was too clouded to worry about that. All you could feel was the disappointment, betrayal, frustration, and sadness that you felt after waiting for hours for him to just show up— but apparently even that was too much to ask.

“I don’t do it on purpose.” Seungmin mumbled. He was tired, you could tell.

“Are you sure about that? Cause it seems like you do.” Your words were getting more heated by the second, and you only got more agitated from another text lighting up Seungmin’s phone.

“Go on. Answer the text. Prove my point.” You challenged, your eyes burning with anger and tears, waiting for what he would do.

“Not tonight, Y/n, please not tonight. This is important.” He said, reaching for his phone to answer the text as if those words were enough to shut you up. They probably should’ve been.

“It’s more important than your girlfriend who you haven’t seen all day?” You asked, a sarcastic laugh escaping your mouth. It at least made him pause, leaving the text unread for an extra five seconds. Record time.

“I hate fighting with you. You know I hate it.”

“Then why do you never show up!?”

He retracted his hand, slow and scared. Scared that he had messed up too badly this time.

“I’m always the one waiting! Waiting for your texts and calls. Waiting for you to show up. You’d think that after all this time I’d stop being so naive about it…” The first tear slipped past your waterline, making its slow descent down your cheek. Seungmin was staring at you, soft eyes still managing to show that he cared. Despite his tiredness, despite your anger, he still cared.

“I keep thinking this date is the one that’ll be successful. But it never is. I always manage to get hurt and disappointed. Every. Time.” Your shoulders shook and you looked down, anger subsiding and being replaced with sadness.

He stood up, hesitantly reaching out to touch your shoulder, making sure you didn’t shrink away from him. He wouldn’t blame you if you did. He pulled you to his chest, heart aching from seeing you cry, especially since he was the reason for it. He hated it the most in the world.

“I’ll show up. I promise I’ll show up…” He whispered as one of his hands gently rubbed circles on your back. 

He wasn’t going to break his promise this time.

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ skz taglist: @kangtaehyunzzz,, @yeonjuns-bluehair,, @syrxiee2,, @ddeonudepressions,, @justhyunhoer

˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ a/n: forgive me for this angst idek how this happened, it's 1 am 💀

[soobnny]

the things we define as love — kim seungmin.

trope. strangers to lovers. college au. just fluff and a rly shy side of seungmin.

synopsis. a study of love through the lens of a tired photography student who has long given up on romance

word count. 2.4k words

warnings. none

note. i thought of this idea during one of my art classes n the stars aligned cuz when i opened pinterest .. low and behold a photo of seungmin with a camera. that’s what birthed this fic basically

What are the things most thought of when asked about love?

Is it the colors you use to paint its beauty in your head? Is it the taste of old chapstick you don’t quite remember the brand of anymore? Is it the reminder of something more painful that left you in resentment?

There are many things Kim Seungmin associates with love – oranges and strawberries freshly picked from the market, the way autumn leaves fall after having held on its tree for so long, the sunrise that greets him when he wakes up, lingering just long enough for him to finish his morning routine, and the way sand falls beneath his feet when he visits the beach.

There are other things too, like photography and its ability to capture moments that otherwise would’ve been gone forever, and like the old couple in front of him.

Seungmin feels a spark in his fingertips, aching to snap a photo of the purest, unadulterated definition of love right before his eyes. He thinks it would be a lovely addition to the project he’s working on for his major subject in photography.

Clearing his throat, he approaches the couple sitting peacefully together by the bench.

They smile up at him, and Seungmin scrunches his face at the thought that he had disturbed their time together.

“Hi. I wanted to… ask permission to take a photo of you two? It’s for a project in my class, we’re supposed to take photographs of the things we define as love, so I was… yeah, I was hoping, if that was alright?”

Seungmin brings a hand at the back of his neck, scratching shyly at his request to which the old woman just smiles fondly at.

“Of course! Honey, did you hear that? This lovely young boy says he wants to take a photo of us.”

She turns to her husband, and Seungmin bites back the urge to take a photo right now – of their excitement, of their sparkling eyes, and of the way they try to fix up the wrinkles of their shirts. The old woman sets her purse down, posture straightening as she loops an arm around her partner. He has a matching grin on his face, actions slightly delayed as they move to angle themselves better.

“Is this alright?” A smile paints their lips and Seungmin nods, sending a thumbs up before grabbing the camera hanging from his neck.

The click of the camera sounds, and Seungmin sneaks in a few shots of them eagerly waiting at a view of the photo.

When he steps forward, they’re already making space for him in between them, and he takes the seat politely. With his camera out to show the picture, he can’t help the way his heart squeezes at their sweet mumbling and the way they thank him for such a lovely photograph.

“This is for your project?” Seungmin nods abashedly at the question, growing even more shy when they ask to see the photos he had taken so far.

While Seungmin has been fairly confident in his skills, he’s suffered through quite a bit of burnout recently. He’s not quite sure he’s escaped it yet which is why he had urged himself to come out today, willed himself to work on his project. He bites down at his lower lip while skimming through the photos on his camera.

There are some of his friend’s pets, the tranquility of the ocean, the stars littering the night sky accompanied by the moon. They shower him in compliments at the sheer beauty of how the images are captured.

“No partner?” A blush sports the boy’s cheeks with the question asked, shaking his head and staring down at the camera in his hands.

In all honesty, Seungmin has long given up on the idea of romantic love for himself. He had the urge of wanting to fall in love years ago – back when he had so much love to give. This had stemmed from the stories and movies where he had caught a glimpse of the love he wished that he had. However, longing and patience can only go so far together, and with years of no one by his side, he’s bound to lose a little bit of hope.

So, he busied himself in his studies.

He finds comfort in believing that someday he’ll know of love that way, but he had long given up on it at present.

As if having read his mind, the old lady places a comforting hand on his shoulder. “Don’t worry about it too much. You’ll know when you meet them. It will sound like… a train whistle.”

Seungmin is a little lost, a puzzled smile on his lips as he nods his head to urge her to continue.

“There’s this old story by Haruki Murakami of a train whistle in the night. Imagine waking up completely alone in the darkness, and you can’t hear anything, and you don’t know the time. It’s like… like having sunk at the very bottom of the ocean. Have you felt this way before?”

While the old lady speaks in riddles, this is a feeling Seungmin is far too familiar with. He knows all too well the claws of loneliness and the heavy weight of aching hearts and drowning lungs. It has forced its fingers down his throat far too many times, making him believe that if he disappeared right now, no one would even notice.

“But you hear the sound of a train whistle, even if it’s far away in the distance. The clock starts ticking again, and you fall back on the ground. It brings you back to reality, makes you feel heard.”

Seungmin’s fingers pause from fiddling with the shutter, turning to look at the lady. There’s something in her expression… of understanding that he’s never quite fallen into contact with before. Like she’s so sure of it.

He looks back down at his camera, but he makes no move to take another photo.

“It’ll come.” With that, she stands from her seat, flattening down her dress. Her hand comes in contact with her husband’s almost immediately, and they turn on their step to walk back to where they came from.

With a final wave and bright smiles, they disappear into the distance. Huh, how strange.

He emerges back to reality with the sound of his ringtone, and he fishes for his phone tucked in the pocket of his jeans.

“Hey, I have that film you need to develop your photos. I’m at the Soul Cup cafe right now, maybe you can drop by to get them?”

“Ah, thanks Hyunjin. I’ll be right there!”

He gets up from the bench himself, having already forgotten of his earlier interactions as he trots back to his university. With his camera safely packed in his camera bag, Seungmin hurries his steps to catch Hyunjin before he leaves.

The sun hasn’t gone yet by the time Seungmin arrives, and he quickly walks into the cafe in search of his friend.

It isn’t difficult to find the silhouette of a man with long pink hair, especially when the coffee shop he liked to frequent wasn’t the most popular among the campus. Although, it seems that someone is with his friend, sitting at the same table with papers strewn around.

“Seungmin, my photographer, you made it!” Hyunjin gets up from his seat, greeting him with a smile and a side hug before directing his attention to you. “Ah, this is (name). (Name), this is Seungmin.”

Seungmin’s breath gets caught in his throat the moment you turn around to exchange pleasantries. His eyes travel around your face, studying your features.

Seungmin isn’t dense, never judges anyone for their looks, but he finds your beauty to be the type subjected to photographs in art galleries. It’s one someone can spend forever admiring and analyzing and never get tired of.

Really pretty, he thinks as he extends a hand to shake yours.

A certain warmth envelopes him when he meets your hand.

“Here’s your film.” A bag is shoved in his general direction, and he grabs it and hugs it by his chest. And then, he’s forced to say his goodbye’s when Hyunjin’s attention shifts back to his own project.

Kim Seungmin sees you again a few weeks after your first encounter.

You’re crouched down on the sidewalk, paint smeared on your hands and clothes. You must be in the art department with Hyunjin, and something about that makes so much sense as Seungmin looks at you. You’re just the type of person to attract art, whether it’s because you create it or because you inspire it.

A closer look at you reveals your messy hair, blown-out by the wind, and a lopsided grin on your face as you call out to the small puppy just by the distance.

He feels the familiar twitch in his fingertips to take a photo. The sight he’s subjected to is too beautiful to not capture. If he took one quick enough, maybe you wouldn’t notice at all.

Seungmin seems to underestimate the actual distance between you and the loud shutter of his camera when he takes the photo. It’s not one of his best moments, and in the moment, he wishes the ground would just swallow him up so he didn’t have to deal with the consequences of his stupid behavior.

His face is already flush with embarrassment the moment you turn around to catch whatever had made that sound.

“Seungmin?” You remember his name, you actually remember his name, and god it couldn’t have sounded any sweeter. Does honey usually drip down the tone of your voice?

When you walk towards him with confusion etched in your face, Seungmin double backs. In the moment, he seriously considers standing in the middle of the road to meet his death instead of facing the embarrassment of explaining to you that he had just taken a photo of you because he thought the moment looked too pretty not to last forever.

He is all nervous laughter when you stop to stand in front of him, head tilted as you stare down at his camera. “Did you just take a photo of me?”

His own words tumble out of his mouth as he tries to explain himself. “Yes, and I’m sorry, I know I should’ve asked for per—“

“Can I see?”

“What?”

“The photo! Can I see it?” You look up at him with a smile, hands behind your back as you sway back and forth while waiting for his response. Only now does he notice the paint on your cheek and the flutter of your eyelashes and the specs of light in your eyes.

Oh god, his stomach doesn’t feel so great, having you look at him like that.

“Uh, sure. Of course!” He fumbles with his camera, clicking on a few buttons before pushing the camera towards you so you can see better. You nod your head, studying the photo before lifting your head back to look at him curiously.

“What’s this for?”

He gulps. “A project… for my class. I’m… I’m in the Photography Department.”

Nodding your head, you flash him another lopsided smile. “You take really pretty pictures. Photography suits you.”

He sends his own boyish, shy smile directed to you at your compliment, bowing slightly in thanks. You simply giggle, shaking your head and telling him you were just telling the truth.

“Can you take another one? I wasn’t aware you were gonna take one so my hair looked a little funny.” You point out, immediately flashing him a grin and a show of a peace sign as if waiting for him to snap a photo in that moment.

He does.

And since then, he has taken multiple photographs of you.

When you would see each other around, you would jokingly strike a pose, and he would take a photo. It’s one of the moments Seungmin treasures and looks forward to.

Usually, he would simply float through the days, unable to feel the ground beneath him, unable to quite tell the time. However, while his days were usually downcast, he finds a little ray of silver lining in the way you smile at him goofily while you readily pose for the camera.

The habit remains even when you meet each other at the Soul Cafe again, Hyunjin as the common friend.

He takes multiple photos of you and Hyunjin that day, some candid and some planned – but when you laugh with your head pulled back and your eyes tearing up just a little at a stupid joke, Seungmin has his camera down.

This sight, of you laughing wholeheartedly, is something he has to see with his own two eyes. He doesn’t think any lens or any photo could do the sight justice.

Hyunjin asks him to walk you home since your dorms are closer to each other, and he happily obliges.

The walk back is short, but it’s still time together, and that was enough for Seungmin.

“Goodnight, Seungmin. Let’s meet each other again!”

Seungmin blinks, unmoving from his position with his hand still lifted in the air from waving at you prior. Your words echo in his head again and again.

Let’s meet each other again.

You want to see him again soon, intentionally this time. You genuinely enjoy his company that you would like to meet him again. Somehow, it’s something Seungmin can’t fathom.

And then you laugh, and it’s a sound that cuts through years of loneliness.

Blood rushes to the tip of his ears, heat engulfing his entire being – a warmth similar to that when he had first met you. He can’t help but stare at you, unable to do or say anything by how dumbfounded he was at such simple words.

When you smile at him one last time, Seungmin can’t help but think that, of all the things that can be associated with love in this world, he thinks none of them quite does it justice like you do.

Seungmin ponders over your words and your shared interactions for the past few weeks on his way home. A gentle smile sits on his face, all because of you and your pretty smile and the brilliance that encompasses the entirety of you.

And then he hears it – quiet, and from a distance. The sound of a train whistle in the night, one so faint he can barely hear it. The clock starts ticking again, and he feels the ground he’s walking on beneath him.

“Oh.” Realization dawns on him, the nudge in his heart visible in his face.

“I see what the old lady means now.”