#seriously people are so weird they were questioning why i liked him when hed committed atrocities and i was like ??? cause hes fictional???

[ink-blot-thoughts]

Okay for a while my genshin bio was "Arlecchino simp, Childe stan, Dottore apologist" and while that was my bio, someone joined my world and asked me why I liked Dottore? At the time I just said heeheehoohoo man funny cause that's true but thinking about it, I've realised why I like Dottore.

So, picture this. I joined genshin in around 3.2ish. I didn't do any events that I hadn't unlocked the story for and I wasn't really in the fandom. So lil old me was just playing through the story, and having the time of my life in Sumeru cause it was so fucking weird.

Then. You defeat the big boss. You cry about Rukkhadevata. Nahida is gonna give us some lore now, right?? Nope get fucking flashbanged.

So this was already shocking enough then out walks Mr Doctor, who had seemingly left Sumeru in a boat. Okay weird, guess he came back. WAIT WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE HAS CLONES?!?! And then his clones get merked the second I find out about them?!!?!?

So I'm reeling from that when he promises knowledge not even the god of wisdom knows. And I perk up cause lore!!! I like lore!!! Then. Then the motherfucker. He says "Sky's fake."

Remember, I knew none of this. Bitch just dropped sky's fake on my head out of nowhere. And while I was going "THE SKY IS FUCKING WHAT?!?!!?" Man just casually faded to black. Like he hadn't dropped the most batshit insane lore possible.

Now if you're normal and you knew the background genshin lore, that would make sense. You already know about the fake sky and Dottore's segments and all, so the casual delivery totally tracks.

But I didn't. So to me this man walked up, drugged us, revealed he had clones, murdered said clones, then dropped one of genshins biggest lore bombs before fucking off. In the space of one conversation. Fucking iconic.

So that's why I like Dottore :)

[glowstickhaloboy]

AU where keith accompanies lance to get a tattoo

so like. lance expects pain. he knows that getting a tattoo will hurt, he just doesnt know how much.

so he brings keith along with him.

thats the thing. keith is lances rival (but also kinda his friend, so it isnt weird to ask him to watch lance get a tattoo) so lance would never  n e v e r  show weakness in front of keith, even if he was getting a needle repeatedly buzzed through his skin

(lance is not terrified of needles, but that doesnt make him their biggest fan)

he made his appointment like a week ago, and since he was doing something small, they were able to squeeze him in much faster than hed thought they would be able to. suddenly, he has to quickly muster up his bravery.

“are you okay, man?” asks keith as they walk into the shop. “you look kinda pale.”

“what? im fine. shut up. mind your own business.”

“pft.”

lance almost feels bad, but hes more distracted by the fact that hes about to permanently mark his skin with ink. like. forever.

and its a worthwhile tattoo, its his aunts name on his shoulder because she passed away last year, and a lot of the adults in lance’s family have the same tattoo and he wants to prove that he’s not a baby anymore, but its still a big commitment

lance and keith are taken to the back room, where a guy is literally in the process of getting a tattoo done, which should not be a surprise in a tattoo parlor, but still lance kinda stares like he cant believe hes really here

keith nudges him. “are you sure youre okay?” he asks again. its the genuine concern in his voice that steels lance’s resolve. bastard.

“i am fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine Keith, what part of that statement dont you understand??” he glances back at the dude with half a dragon on his back. gulps. “totally fine.”

“because if you arent sure about this,” keith continues, “you shouldnt do it.”

lance scoffs. “im sure, keith. dont be ridiculous. and since when did you care? besides, i already made a downpayment, so if i dont go through with it, im out 60 bucks.”

keith shrugs. “whatever you say.”

so eventually the guy getting dragon-ed leaves with more of a dragon, not all of it, because apparently huge tattoos are done in sessions (by hour how can someone be okay with getting needled for h o u r s at a time???) and the artist wipes down seemingly everything in the room with disinfectant. lance is grateful for this. it gives him plenty of time to bolster his courage again.

the artist explains everything through to lance, and he doesnt know why hes still nervous. he really doesnt want the needle to hurt. he doesnt want to regret the decision in three months. he doesnt want everyone to make a big deal out of him getting a tattoo.

he has to take off his shirt because the tattoo is going to be on the back of his shoulder. hes been using humor to cover up his freak out this entire time, but now if he laughs he’ll mess up the tattoo, so he just has to lay there, trying not to look at keith, and listen to the pandora station the shop has playing.

finally, just as its about to start, even though keith is there, lance admits to the artist, “the anticipation is going to be horrible if im not facing you-”

“relax, man,” the artist says. “im not gonna leave you hanging. I’ll tell you before i come at you.”

and lance is like. okay. you can do this. brave face time. keith is right there. time to impress him.

and then the needle starts buzzing and lances eyes must go as wide as saucers. keith hides a snicker behind his hand and lance glares at him harder than he glared at uncle ricardo when he went for the last quesadilla at lance’s sister’s wedding. “i dont see you getting stabbed over here, keith,” he says.

keith shrugs. “you chose this,” is all he says.

“damn right i did, and its important to me, so stop making fun of me, you nerd ass jerk face.”

keith sobers. “youre right, sorry.” hes still smiling, though.

and, okay, there is pain. theres definitely pain. but its honestly not horrible. thinking about what it was going to be was definitely worse than going through it. lance isnt a wimp, he finds a rhythm to breathe in and grits his teeth past the burn.

all in all, the tattoo does not take more than fifteen minutes. lance is actually surprised by how fast it goes. he stands when the artist tells him to and twists around to check out his back in the mirror.

his heart soars. it looks awesome. he may or may not tear up a little.

the artist helps lance bandage the tattoo and gives him instruction for aftercare, and lance returns the favor with a generous tip.

keith is holding out lance’s shirt, and lance flushed when he realizes that hes still naked from the waist up. he snatches his shirt and tugs it back on.

“it does look really good, man,” says keith.

lance is practically glowing. “it does, doesnt it?” he says. “my family’s going to love it.” and then softer, “i love it.”

keith punches lance’s arm lightly. “you should. and, for the record, i was surprised at how well you kept it together. except for gritting your teeth once, you really handled yourself.”

lance’s blush deepens. “were you watching that closely?” he asks, embarrassed.

keith doesnt say anything because they reach the door to the shop. he holds it open for lance. lance catches a whiff of the pizza place across the street.

“dude, i am starving. i havent been able to eat all day, i was so nervous. you wanna grab something to eat? my treat, since i dragged you all the way out there.”

keith--keith--smiles. “i’d like that,” he says.

once theyre seated inside, lance asks, “so come on then, if you were getting a tattoo, what would it be?”

“i already have one,” keith says, stone serious.

“really?! where??”

“on my foot. its a wolf’s head that says courage. its spelled out in the teeth.”

“no way! youre lying to me right now! i gotta see this!”

keith rolls his eyes. “obviously im lying lance. but if i had to get one... i dont know. i would want something personal. but i feel like i dont have enough pieces of my own life to pick something out yet.”

lance stares for a second. blinks. “keith, that is literally the saddest thing anyone has ever said to me. you arent waiting for your life to stumble back towards you! youre living your life right now. who you are right now is, well, who you are. and your life is what it is. even if youre not, i dont know, complete, youve still got to have things that are important to you.”

“yeah.” keith looks down at the table, folding a closed sugar packet. “i guess youre right.”

their pizza shows up. they dig in, and the conversation turns lighter. lance surprises himself by thinking how much hes enjoying spending time with keith. keith, of all people, makes lance happy. like he has any right to.

“alright,” keith says at last, his mouth sort of full. “it would be a massive cock over my heart.”

lance chokes. “KEITH.”

“because of how much i love cock, lance, you see, its whats most important to me-”

“WHY ARE YOU SAYING THIS TO ME.”

keith breaks and starts laughing. “Shh youll get us kicked out!”

lance stifles his heart attack with great difficulty. because keith, who lance had the biggest hate-crush on in the history of hate-crushes, just told lance that he loves cock, and lance has one of those. and it is definitely getting the wrong idea from this conversation.

“i retract my question on the grounds that you are not taking this seriously,” says lance, blushing furiously.

keith nods. “thats fair.”

they recover quickly and finish their pizza. as theyre walking out, lance realizes that he really doesnt want their fun day together to end yet. he invites keith back to his house for video games or a movie or whatever, and hes sure hes going to be shut down. but keith, surprisingly, accepts.

halfway into the movie, keith breaks the stiff canal of distance lance placed between them on the couch to say, “lance. you know ive been hitting on you all day, right?”

lance chokes again even though there isnt anything in his mouth this time. “oh yeah?” he stammers. “well, m-maybe you’re so lousy at it i couldn’t even tell!” his voice sounds shrill. his face is burning. he cant look keith in the eyes.

“i thought that might be a possibility,” keith says coolly. “that’s why im telling you know: i have a crush on you, lance.”

“You cant just say stuff like that!” lance protests, waving his arms around defensively. “what am i supposed to say back to that?”

“hopefully, something like, ‘wow, me too, keith, today has been the most fun ever.’”

without looking at keith, lance slowly melts leftways on the couch, so he ends up pooled somewhere in keiths general area. “i had fun today,” he says. “i think youre hot. and nice. but thats all youre getting out of me.”

keith laughs, and lance decides he could stand to hear that again. all in all, not a bad day