#seriously no good flowers on my block too windy

[givemedamage]

happy international women day!

[likes-words-and-shrimp]

Left Unsettled

With Iselia under snowfall, Genis seeks out the friend he chose in the end.

Fandom: Tales of Symphonia Characters: Genis Sage, Lloyd Irving, Mithos Yggdrasill Rating: G Mirror Links: AO3 Notes: My submission for the @talessecretsanta​ event. A Happy Holidays to @ayu-ohseki! I loved the idea of the snow prompt, so I hope what I went with is okay with these characters! 

“We’re still friends, aren’t we?”

Genis hadn’t been prepared. The nights in Flanoir were cold, but exhilarating. He had told Raine he’d only be gone for a little while – maybe even get her a hot drink to help with the cold she was developing. Days didn’t last long in this part of Tethe’alla, the sun slinking away quickly as night crept forth. So he blamed the darkness on why he couldn’t recognize Mithos standing by the street corner, the lamppost so dim it barely did anything to illuminate the roads.

Genis had hesitated too long. “Of course we are.”

Perhaps that look had always been there in Mithos’ eyes, something hard and sharp, bringing forth a voice that was stripped bare of any texture that had once been so comforting to Genis. “Remember when I asked you before? If me and Lloyd were in a fight, whose side would you be on?”

If Genis were truly as smart as he claimed, he would’ve known just what to say. But again, his voice was dry, despite the damp snow that soaked his ankles. “But, you’re both my friends!”

Mithos scoffed. “It doesn’t work like that and you know it.”

“That’s not…” Genis continued to struggle. “It doesn’t make what I said any less true.”

“Yet as my friend, you would still go against me.” He stepped back. “Despite everything you’ve been through.”

“But I-”

“What have the humans ever done for us except treat us with ridicule? What makes Lloyd any different? He who has never been discriminated against in his life?”

“Stop it!” Genis shouted, before wincing at the loudness of his voice. The snow made everything so quiet, he felt as if the whole town must have heard. “Just please, listen to me.”

Mithos refused. He had already disappeared before Genis could say another word.

.

.

.

The weathers in Sylvarant had never been so hectic. Rainstorms took over Asgard instead of bright windy days, and Triet’s sands were sometimes sleeked over with ice, especially as night fell. People adapted however, as they had adapted to the sudden new world that had appeared right next to them.  

Genis looked up to the sky, wide-eyed as the first snowflakes started to fall onto the Iselian forest. He hadn’t expected this to happen, in spite of everything, and was regretting that he didn’t just take a rheiard. As long as the snowfall didn’t get as intense as in Flanoir…

He was at Lloyd’s house before the snow could pile up, but already there was a fine powder of white on its roof. His boots crunched against the building snow banks, and he watched curiously as some of the flakes drifted onto the river’s surface. Goosebumps raised over his skin, no matter how much he tried to rub his arms to stay warm.

He didn’t see Noishe in his usual shed, and figured the dwarf took pity on the animal to find some indoor warmth.

He had been over Lloyd’s home so many times over the years that he rarely needed to announce himself or even ask to be let in. The door opened easily, unlocked as it was during the day. The heat from inside instantly took away his chill.

“Ah, Genis! Good to see ya during this mighty crazy weather we be having.”

Dirk was as familiar a sight to him as Lloyd himself, the dwarf looking busy as he cradled some kindling in his arms. Much of the wood looked damp, and he pictured Dirk having gone outside as soon as the first snowflake had fallen. Off in one corner of the living room was Noishe, nose covered by his bushy tail as he slept all curled up.

“If I had known it was going to be snowing, I would’ve just stayed home.” Still, Lloyd had promised him that they would meet today. Between the constant barrage of questions from the other children back in Iselia to Lloyd getting ready for the Exsphere journey, there wasn’t that much time left they had.

“Aye, we haven’t had a good and proper winter for nigh on a century. Was probably about Lloyd’s age since I’ve seen such a storm.” Dirk took the cut wood over to the furnace, not at all mindful of any splinters that must have pricked his bare arms. “Well, just sit tight and I can brew up some hot tea for ya. I even have some leftovers from last night’s dinner if you’re hungry.”

While Dwarven Potluck Surprise sounded good, Genis couldn’t really find the stomach for it today. “Thanks, Dirk. But I think I’m just gonna go talk with Lloyd. Is he out back doing chores or something?” The young boy couldn’t help but smirk at the idea of his friend trying to lug around a raft-full of logs for the house, probably complaining every step of the day, or being bored somehow.

The dwarf shook his head. “Thought I could give the lad a bit of a break for now. Usually I’d be making him do his morning chores, but after his heroic deeds, I figured he deserves a little rest.”

Genis considered Dirk’s words, sobering him up quickly. The idea of Lloyd doing menial labor was still a bit funny in his head and yet… “That’s very kind of you. Lloyd did work really hard… How long as he been sleeping?”

Dirk put on a considering expression. “About 10 hours give or take.”

“Ah.” Genis paused. “But it’s almost noon.”

“That it is.”

Genis cleared his throat. “Excuse me please.”

Immediately, Genis walked up the stairs of Lloyd’s home, found his door, then knocked hard on it.

“Hey! Get your butt up right now!”

What he heard next was the sound of something heavy fall to the floor with a loud thump.

“Ow! Damn it!”

Genis took no pity, and kept knocking. “Lloyd!”

It still took Lloyd too long to get himself up and open the door. His clothes were wrinkled and he had the worst case of bedhead that Genis had ever seen. “Agh, why do you have to yell? I was sleeping!”

“That’s exactly why I woke you up, stupid! Did you already forget why I’m here?”

“Uh.” Lloyd blinked. Genis could see the gears work in the other’s head to a painful, painful degree. “Wait. Oh! Yeah, uh, I didn’t forget! Give me a break, I just woke up!” Lloyd then rubbed his shoulder a little frantically. “Man, why’s it so cold?”

It was enough to make Genis sigh. “Lloyd, just get dressed and meet me outside. And don’t go back to sleep. Not even for five minutes!” He was being too mean, but his thoughts were so frantic today and he needed Lloyd to be aware. “It won’t take long anyway.”

Lloyd seemed to understand him, at least with that. “Alright, I’ll be out.” He shivered visibly. “But seriously, why’s it so cold?”

Genis had to resist the urge to facepalm.

Of course, Lloyd was completely flabbergasted at the snow that fell all around his house. Dirk had lent the two a pair of cloaks that they could wear over their clothes. The lining was thick, with fur stitched on the inside to keep them warm. Genis hugged the cloak tight, knowing the dwarf wouldn’t mind if he took it all the way home, yet still feeling a bit guilty for it.

“Wow, it’s just like back in Flanoir!” Lloyd walked up to the makeshift bridge over the river, scraping his boot against its surface to see if it was too slippery to cross. They both remained on his front yard, the world feeling so silenced as the snow continued to fall all around them.

“Iselia hasn’t been exposed to this kind of environment since it’s usually so warm.” Genis walked up to Lloyd, eyeing both river and bridge. “But now that the other summon spirits’ powers have been released, Efreet is no longer the only one that has influence over this area. And Celsius seems to not really like Efreet either…”

Lloyd turned. “What, so she’s doing this to piss him off or something?”

Genis huffed. “More like a demonstration of her power. At least showing Efreet he’s not the only relevant summon spirit anymore.”

Lloyd tilted his head. “…Still sounds like she’s just doing it to piss him off to me.”

“Forget it.” Genis looked at the ground, watching the footprints he made. They looked small compared to Lloyd’s, watching their path entwine around the other as they had walked from the house. “But with the winter so sudden, this could affect the crops back in Iselia. It could even alter the ecosystem we have, especially for animals that aren’t used to the drop in temperature. This could really mess things up.”

“Oh… well…” Lloyd considered, forehead scrunched in thought. “Maybe we can talk to Sheena about it? Have her summon Celsius and ask-”

Genis ran off suddenly, going across the bridge with not a step out of place.

“H-hey! Genis! Wait up!”

Back when he first visited Flanoir, Genis had been so excited over the snow, running through the streets, not caring how his clothes were not enough to keep him from being sick. But that was before, and now, he felt like he had gotten so much older in such a short time. It all felt so immature to be excited at this much snow. Not when one considered the effects it could have to a home he had grown to love, then hated, then loved again when he was accepted back. Gaining back the acceptance of the humans had made him so happy.

And he felt guilty for it.

.

.

.

The flower field that Genis and Mithos had found had been a far-reaching sea of white. It reminded Genis of the snow back in Flanoir, the way the wind blew up the pale petals to swirl all around them like snow flurries. But they had defeated the monsters that had blocked their way up the mountain path, and both boys were able to revel in their success, walking among the field as petals fell into their hair.

“You really know so much about herbs, Mithos!” Genis had praised his friend. “Now we can cure Raine!”

“I’m glad.” Mithos smiled, standing off to the side as his eyes went elsewhere. “She’s your only family, isn’t she? It’s important to take care of each other.”

Genis gathered what flowers he could, careful not to crinkle the petals or twist the stems as he plucked them. “Yeah. I’ve been with Raine forever. She’s always taken care of me.”

“…My sister was the same,” Mithos whispered. “She was all the family I had, too.”

The tone made Genis pause. Mithos had never spoken to him at length about his sister, besides the memento he carried.

“She took care of me when our own parents refused. She watched out for me when we had to sleep out in the open. Even in a world where everyone hated us, she made me feel less alone.”

Mithos walked up to Genis to then sit on the soft grass. He was careful in his motions, choosing a spot where no flowers would be crushed. The wind grew stronger, continuing to make the petals dance around them. “Once, she got very sick; from staying up too late and keeping watch, or speaking with the few humans that didn’t turn us away. It was still only us traveling together and I knew she went through so much stress. I had no one else to turn to when it happened. I had to get the herbs she needed myself.”

Genis sat with him, watching the petals float before his eyes.

“I was only able to do that because she had taught me about the flowers in the first place. I owe everything to her. Everything.”

Because of what Mithos was telling him, Genis felt touched. To know not only another half-elf his age, but also one who had a sister that was dear to him. Yet guilt still filled him, because Genis knew he was luckier than Mithos. Raine was still alive.

“I hate humans,” Mithos said suddenly, a comment that Genis knew would have shocked most of his friends. But all he felt was something familiar, something understandable. “They took everything away from me.”

“I hate humans, too,” Genis confessed, still holding his gathered flowers gently. “But, there are humans like Lloyd who aren’t too bad. And I know he wants to help you, too!”

Mithos didn’t answer right away. Instead he kept looking to the sky, the night very chill. “Genis, if me and Lloyd got into a fight, whose side would you be on?”

“Huh?”

“You and Lloyd get along so well. But what if… we didn’t agree on something? Whose side would you pick?”

The answer back then had been easy to Genis.

“Well, Lloyd would probably fight about something dumb, I’m sure, so I guess yours!”

That was enough to get Mithos back to smiling. “Really?”

“Yeah. Because we’re friends!”

.

.

.

Genis didn’t have to wait long for Lloyd to find him. He sat at the foot of an overhanging oak, its left side so bent over with snow that its burden looked ready to fall at any moment. He didn’t care whether it did. Once he could hear Lloyd’s footsteps crunching against the snow, he decided to open his eyes.

“Genis! The hell you do that for?” Lloyd panted out the words, unprepared for the chase he had to embark on today. “I thought you wanted to talk or something!”

“Yeah,” Genis simply answered. He looked unimpressed at Lloyd, hands on his knees as he continued to try and catch his breath. “How are you that tired already? I’m not the one who walks and runs around all day like you do!”

“Shut it! I told you I just woke up!” Lloyd brushed away the snow that tried to cling to his hair. “And the snow makes it harder to run!”

Genis laughed, almost unsure as to why Lloyd’s frustrations seemed to cheer him up so much. Maybe because he knew Lloyd wasn’t actually mad. If he had been, he wouldn’t have bothered running after Genis at all.

“Well, I still wanted to talk with you. I just wanted to do it here. It’s better scenery!”

It really wasn’t that much different from the other areas of the forest, except perhaps without the sight of Lloyd’s house. The trees were packed thicker around here, their boughs taking the weight of the fallen snow, leaving the grass beneath them mostly bare.

Lloyd, still with a confused look on his face, sat down next to Genis with a satisfying motion, glad to give his feet some rest.

“Alright. Well, what was so important that we had to go out in the middle of nowhere basically? And wake me up early?”

It wasn’t early at all! Genis wanted to say, but the words wouldn’t come. He fiddled with the cloak. He had made Lloyd wait too long, but still.

“Did you ever try getting them back?”

That of course just brought him more questions.

“Them? Who are they?”

“I mean, not them as in people. I mean, like, your wings! Remember?”

Genis suddenly wondered if Lloyd might not actually remember. How awkward this would be.

“Oh yeah! Hm, well, Colette was teaching me how to summon them for a little while.” Lloyd looked nervous at that. “I, uh, it didn’t really go well. I’m not even sure I can anymore.”

Genis wondered.

“Eh, it’s not like I need them anyway. Why you ask though?”

“It was because of Mithos, wasn’t it?”

Lloyd didn’t answer, and that was good. It gave Genis the space he needed to keep going, here in this place, where the snow masked sound. Maybe it swallowed away the hard beating in his chest.

“When you broke his crystal, I saw it go into your Exsphere. I saw… him. He helped you in the end, didn’t he? Or at least his power? That means he must have understood by then, right? That it’s all okay still?”

“Genis-”

“I never stopped being his friend, you know.” Genis kept unloading more than he wanted to, and suddenly he was no longer mature, or older, or anything like that. He still felt like he was just a stupid twelve-year old, still relying on the adults to take care of him. “Even after what he did to you, and Colette, and everyone else, he was still my friend. And I wanted him to stay my friend forever.”

He was not blaming Lloyd, or maybe he was. But what did that say of him when in the end, he couldn’t help someone who suffered so much?

“I wanted to save him, too.” He felt Lloyd’s eyes on him, just barely seeing it out of his peripheral vision. But the snow was easier to bear.

What makes Lloyd any different? He who has never been discriminated against in his life?

“Lloyd, how come you went out of your way to be my friend?”

“Huh?” Genis couldn’t blame him this time for the confusion. The change in topic had been deliberate. The thoughts in his head wouldn’t stop – not unless he addressed all of them as fast as he could.

“You were already friends with Colette, so why bother with me? I wasn’t even close to your age at all!”

“Well… you helped me out with my homework that one time! So I thought you were just a cool kid.”

“Great. So you were just using our friendship to help your failing grades!”

“No way! Not just that!” That made both of them laugh, and suddenly it was easier to speak, to be more comfortable in the snow, warmed by their cloaks. “I mean… you were always sitting alone at lunch, but you always talked so smart in class. Couldn’t really understand why no one was willing to talk with you.”

“Come on, Lloyd.” Genis rolled his eyes. “You know why.”

“…I guess, but… that was dumb! And I wanted to be your friend anyway. Not many wanted to talk to me either.”

“I know. Just, even when I said I was an elf, people still looked at me weird.” The silence was coming back, prompting Genis to find the words he’d hidden away for a long time. “You’re different, Lloyd. I don’t think Mithos could understand that, not until…” Something clogged his throat. “I’m being such a baby.”

“But you’re not!”

“I just… I don’t know.” Genis wiped at his eyes. It stung more than he thought it would. The icy air was too much. Would Iselia ever be warm again? “Mithos still looked so sad last time. It was the real him after everything else – not even Yggdrasil. I want to believe he understood finally, but I know I’m just being stupid.”

“No, because… I don’t think you’re wrong!”

There it was. A confirmation of whatever little hope he had. He turned to Lloyd, surprised to see that the other actually seemed confident as to what he was saying. The snow no longer fell on his hair, the tree they sat under shielding them well.

“I really think Mithos helped me. And… I think at least he’s beginning to understand. That’s why we have to do all we can, you know? That a world like this can still continue to exist, and that no one has to suffer anymore. We need to still show him that!”

“Wait,” Genis interrupted. “Still?”

“Ah… yeah.” Lloyd then looked a little embarrassed, one gloved hand scratching his scalp. “Like, I believe he was with me when me and Colette went to get back the seed, but I don’t think he disappeared after that. I can take you to see him and Martel later if you want!”

Genis had to make sense of Lloyd’s ramblings. He tended to go off in tangents that made little sense to him but sometimes the most sense to Colette. Yet Genis wasn’t sure how much he wanted to know, though he hazarded a guess here and there.

“You named it, didn’t you?” Genis asked.

Lloyd nodded. “It seemed to fit, after everything.”

Even after so much time together, Lloyd continued to surprise him.

“I still have to pack up and all, but maybe we can make a pit stop there if the Professor doesn’t mind? And as long as we promise Martel not to reveal the tree’s location, it should be good!”

“Seriously?” Genis started at his friend, hard. “You’re serious, right?”

“Of course I am. I wanted to take everybody there someday, but I think it’s important you see it first.” Lloyd turned to him with a big grin. “What do you say?”

Immediately, Lloyd was met with a snowball to the face.

“Agh!” He fell on his side, while Genis stood, grinning in the smuggest way he could. Sure, maybe he could give one to Zelos this time. He really could be a brat when he wanted to.

After wiping his face, Lloyd looked around frantically at the ground, where the grass was still bare of most snow underneath the tree. “Where’d you even get that?!”

Genis laughed. “Ice magic, dummy!” The mana was strong. No longer did he feel like he was trying to catch as much as he could through a sieve. The snow exemplified it, of Celsius’ power. But in the background, he could feel Efreet’s fire, ready to melt away the ice so that the forest could breathe. The world could only get better if everyone worked together, whether they be mortal or not.

“Oh yeah?” Lloyd quickly got up, going to the side to gather a huge bundle of snow in both hands, already packing it tightly. “This time, no cheating!”

They had done this in Flanoir, too. The snow had been fresh and falling. While the adults had retreated to the inn, both Lloyd and Genis both decided to discover all that the snow could offer them. Genis’ lungs had been burning with cold, just like now, but he hadn’t wanted to stop running. Lloyd could have acted all mature and stayed away, and sometimes, Genis could see the thought in Lloyd’s eyes, especially when he wanted to show off to Colette. But it was nice when they could both just act stupid, falling over steps and scraping their knees as they tried to pelt each other with snowballs.

The forest didn’t feel so silent with them shouting their heads off, probably enough for even Dirk to hear far off. A sneaky snow boulder that caught Genis at the shoulder, then a fistful of snow that Lloyd accidentally caught with his mouth – it was all so really dumb. But that was what Genis needed, and he might as well enjoy until the ice melted away the next day.

You’re my best friend, Lloyd, he had told him once. He should have said it again, but he figured Lloyd must have known, after everything.

.

.

.

“Wow! You’re amazing, Genis! You got rid of that monster!”

“Whoa, I did?” Genis asked, the hand gripping his kendama still shaking.

Mithos nodded, his face a little pale from the scare they had endured. “One of your fireballs must have hit it! Thank you.”

“Aw, it was no problem for a genius mage like me!”

However, as they turned to go, Genis heard a sound, like someone tripping over the uneven ground.

“Damn it.” Then nothing, like a held breath.

He didn’t say anything, still walking alongside Mithos. But Lloyd had never been the stealthiest of the bunch (not with such a bright outfit and heavy weapons like that), and it wasn’t too hard for Genis to sneak glances and see a familiar patch of red through the grass or just peeking from a nearby boulder.

He was sure Mithos must have known, too.

Genis wondered, after their conversation, if Mithos ever resented Lloyd for tagging along with them, making sure none of the monsters ever did serious harm. Not like Genis ever thought he couldn’t handle it. He was only getting better with his magic after all, and Tethe’alla’s vast reservoir of mana only made his spells that much easier to grasp. Still, he was comforted with Lloyd at his back. How many other humans could he say the same of?

“Ow!” He heard a sharp clunk – Lloyd must have hit his head on a rock. Genis winced.

He caught a flash of sharp blue, from Mithos. “We should hurry. Raine’s condition could worsen if we don’t.”

“Yeah.” Genis rushed a little faster, knowing Lloyd could keep up the pace.

“Besides, it feels like it’s getting even more cold.” Mithos walked evenly, back to Genis. “It might even snow.”

Genis said nothing else, walking after his friend ahead, while his other kept him guarded from whatever else could be lurking behind.

He really hoped Lloyd and Mithos could be good friends after all this. Perhaps it was selfish, considering what they were all trying to achieve, and what the world was going through, but he hoped for nothing else.

[myaekingheart]

Rules: answer all questions, add one question of your own and tag as many people as there are questions.

I was tagged by @alittlenarnian! Thank youuu ^_^

I’m just gonna do everyone a favor here and put this all under the cut because I thought way too deeply into pretty much every single one of these questions and I’m not gonna subject everyone to scrolling past all my nonsense.

1. Coke or Pepsi: I don't know, probably coke? I don't drink a lot of soda but I've always been a big fan of orange soda, myself. Or that one kind in the Coke place in Epcot c:

2. Disney or Dreamworks: I love both but I'm gonna have to go with Disney. It's had more influence over me, and I feel like most of the movies have way more than heart than a lot of what Dreamworks puts out (aside from HTTYD and Rise of the Guardians and the original 2D stuff like Spirit).

3. Coffee or Tea: Tea. Coffee makes me sick.

4. Books or Movies: This is hard because I love both so much but I'm gonna have to go with books. I love the visual beauty of movies but on the other hand, nothing compares to the feeling of pages between your fingers and that high you get from looking at words when you read a book, and the way you can imagine everything exactly as you want and no two personal renderings are ever exactly the same. That's cool. I like that.

5. Windows or Mac: Windows.

6. DC or Marvel: I've never been huge into the superhero scene but I'm gonna have to go with Marvel (though if it was a choice, I'd definitely pick The Incredibles universe).

7. X-Box or Playstation: Tough call but I'm gonna have to go with X-Box.

8. Dragon Age or Mass Effect: Dragon Age.

9. Night Owl or Early Riser: DEFINITELY night owl. I can't get up early for the life of me and when I do, I'm in a constant fog.

10. Cards or Chess: Cards because they're more flexible. You can play tons of different games with cards-- Go Fish, Solitaire, Old Maid, Blackjack. Chess is just chess. It's not as portable as a deck of cards, either.

11. Chocolate or Vanilla: Chocolate.

12. Vans or Converse: Converse.

13. Lavellan, Trevelyan, Cadash, or Adaar: No idea what any of that is tbqh

14. Fluff or Angst: Little bit of both never hurt anyone. All about balance, amirite?

15. Beach or Forest: Tough call but I kind of have to go with forest, actually??? Like don't get me wrong I adore the beach, it's gorgeous as all hell, but at the same time, it's like every time I go to the beach it's always super windy and crowded and you're either freezing cold or scorching hot and then you get sand in weird places. I kind of like the close-knit spaces of the forest and how close to nature I feel when I'm there, like on nature trails and stuff. I like all the trees looming over me-- they make me feel safe-- and the different flowers and creatures all around and all the different pathways you can take. It always feels like an adventure.

16. Dogs or cats: I love both but I lean a little bit more towards dogs just because I've grown up with them all my life. I like how you can rough-house with dogs (big dogs, anyways) and they'll just flop over and love on you. Cats never liked me but now that I've spent more time around them, they've really started growing on me more.

17. Clear skies or rain: Rain. Definitely rain. Nothing makes me happier than those days when you can just curl up on the couch in your pajamas with a bowl of soup and a movie marathon and the sky is all dark and there's a steady rain beating on the roof, maybe a little thunder and lightning, and you just snuggle close on the couch in a giant blanket and just ugh it's the absolute best and I adore it.

18. Cooking or eating out: I can't really cook for the life of me but if I had to choose, I'd pick cooking over eating out just because making food is better than putting on pants to go out someplace and eat. I don't always feel comfortable eating out anyways, for whatever reason. And at least when you (attempt) to cook something, not only do you get food but you also feel the accomplishment of having made something that tastes good (hopefully) and has a purpose.

19. Spicy food or mild food: I never used to be like this but spicy food has grown on me so I'm gonna pick that. I can only handle so much kick but I definitely enjoy how flavorful spicy food is over blander stuff.

20. Halloween/Samhain or Solstice/Yule/Christmas: UGH THIS IS SO HARD BUT I'M GONNA HAVE TO GO WITH CHRISTMAS. I adore Halloween just because it gives me an excuse to dress up where I'm not considered a geek, but then again I dress up year-round and kind of stopped giving a fuck what people think about it. Christmas is great, though. You get good food and lots of presents and can spend time with people you love and there's lights and happiness everywhere and great excuses to snuggle up on the couch with bae. Fills me so much warmth <3

21. Would you rather forever be a little too cold or a little too hot: A little too cold because at least that way I could always put on cozy socks or snuggle up in a blanket. If I'm too hot, there's only so much I can do and a finite number of clothes I can shed before I'm passed out on the tile ass naked with the refrigerator open.

22. If you could have any superpower, what would it be: Invisibility. I answered that really, really quickly but hey, it's not a sin to know what you want. So yes. Either invisibility or forcefields. Or both. Both is good. Invisibility would be great so I could sneak around or bypass awkward confrontations but at the same time, I'm very much a wallflower so it's kind of like I'm invisible already. Forcefields, on the other hand, could be really beneficial because I like my personal space and if anyone's coming too close, I can just be like *boop* nope-ity nope nope. I think the biggest benefit from forcefields, though, would be blocking myself from the wind. There is nothing I hate more than wind and if I could find any way to barricade myself from it so it wouldn't have to inconvenience me from doing what I need to do, that would be stupendous.

23. Animation or live action: Ugh this is a hard one and I don't know if I have a really definite answer for this one. It honestly just depends. Animation is a beautiful medium that I adore but some things are far more suited for live action. I guess if I had to choose, though, I'd go with animation since I feel like live action, at least in big budget fantasy, adventure, sci-fi, and action movies, are all animated to a degree anyways (I seriously miss the days when special effects makeup was still a big thing instead of the way everything's been these days, where everything is just computer generated. Not that CG isn't beautiful but I just miss the tangibility of special effects and prefer it over the painterly and sweeping CGI, though I mean there is a time and a place for both I suppose).

24. Paragon or Renegade: Again, no idea what that is.

25. Baths or showers: Showers. I'm too antsy to take baths anymore. Plus you can't take books in there unless you're deliberately trying to ruin them.

26. Team Cap or Team Iron Man: Team Cap.

27. Fantasy or Sci-Fi: Fantasy

28. Do you have three or four favourite quotes, if so, what are they: "I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I am not" - Kurt Cobain (This was actually my senior quote in high school, too :D) "It'll all be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end" (I honestly which I had a credit for this) "You're braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think" -AA Milne "How lucky I am to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard" -AA Milne (again) Basically all of AA Milne's quotes, even if I haven't heard them yet, I instantly love, okay?

29. Netflix or youtube: Tough call but youtube mainly because I don't have Netflix and youtube does not cost me money. Sure, you can't get full episodes most of the time but oh well.

30. Harry Potter or Percy Jackson: I've honestly never really been into either? My GSP class did a Greek mythology unit and we had to read The Lightning Thief and I just could not get into it whatsoever. If I had to choose, I guess I'd say Harry Potter solely because even though the Harry Potter series itself never really interested me all that much (I've only read and seen the first three but I could never get past the puke scene in the second one without nearly vomiting myself), I have to admit that Fantastic Beasts looks incredible and really captured my interest.

31. When you feel accomplished: When I get shit done, pretty much. I procrastine a lot but when I finally crack down on myself and make myself write that paper or that next chapter or get those supplies for that one cosplay or anything like that, I instantly feel prouder of myself for actually doing things rather than dreaming of them.

32. Star Wars or Star Trek: Again, I never really got into either but I'd have to go with Star Wars just because I know more about it and because Harrison Ford reminds me of my dad and that makes me happy.

33. Paperback or Hardback: Hardback. Paperbacks are great and all but there's something special about hardback books. They feel classic.

34. Horror or rom-com: Rom-com. Horror is good in small doses but gooey, sticky-sweet rom-com is like those strawberry candies you find at your grandma's house that you could always stand to have more of.

35. TV shows or movies: Ugh that's a tough call, too. On one hand, a lot of time and effort goes into movies but then TV shows are a little more digestible sometimes just because they're shorter increments but you get more out of it because it spans a much longer period of time and you can really expand on a story more in a show than you can in a two hour film. So I guess maybe both??? Can I do that? Can I pick both? Because I know if I try to bargain with myself to make a dead-set decision here, we're gonna be sitting here all night watching me go back and forth about this.

36. Spotify or Pandora: I don't use either so I don't really have a preference. I just like using the music I've downloaded onto my phone.

37. Zootopia or Inside Out: Zootopia because police.

38. Favourite book: The Chronicles of Narnia books by CS Lewis, hands down. I've read a lot of great books but no matter what, I always find myself coming back to Narnia. It's like a permanent part of my soul that just breaks down the door whenever I forget about it and forces itself back into my life.

39. Favourite flower: I really love red roses because they're just so romantic and red is my favorite color.

40. What field of study are you in (or aspire to be in): I'm working towards getting a bachelor's in creative writing so I guess you could say my field of study is English? I wanna write shit.

41. Song lyric you really love: Oh god, I have a lot but okay, here goes. "I am a princess on the way to my throne destined to reign, destined to rule"- Can't Take It In by Imogen Heap (off the LWW soundtrack) "If you wanna break these walls down, you're gonna get bruised"- Castle by Halsey "If your stomach feels weak, then my work here is done" The Words Best Friend Become Redefined by Chiodos "Another cog in the murder machine"- Teenagers by My Chemical Romance

42. What’s your MBTI type: ISFP

43. What is your zodiac sign: Taurus

44. Where is your favourite place to go: My boyfriend's place because anywhere where he is is home and I love spending time with him no matter where we are or what we're doing.

45. Favourite stuffed animal as a kid: Okay, so this doesn't really constitute as a "stuffed animal", so to speak, but when I was a kid, I was incredibly attached to this baby doll my mom's mom had bought for me when I was born. I named her Baby Doll (real creative, I know) and took her everywhere with me, and slept with her every night for way longer than I'd like to admit. I loved her to pieces and still do, actually, but in a different way now than I did back then. When I was little, I was in love with her the same way I imagine a mother loves her child because to me, she was like my kid. Nowadays it's more like I love her because of all the joy she brought me as a kid and all the memories I made with her. I actually still have her and she hasn't fallen apart (completely) yet. Her painted facial features on her plastic head have started to fade a little bit and her the stuffing in her plushie body has already gone kind of limp and flat and her little outfit has turned gray (I think I tried burying her in the backyard once and she never recovered??? I accidentally dropped her in a river over the edge of a boat once, too. The kid's been through some shit, alright?) but I still look at her and see the same doll I was so grossly in love with and attached to when I was a little girl and I love that a lot.

46. Favourite icecream flavour: It's a toss-up between mint chocolate chip, which was my first ever favorite ice cream flavor, and chocolate chip cookie dough. Neopolitan is pretty great, too, for when I want the classics but can't decide on just one.

47. Chanel or Gucci: I could honestly care less about either but if I had to choose, Chanel just because Coco Chanel was pretty cool.

48. What’s your hogwarts house: Hufflepuff

49. Who’s your celebrity crush: Oh damn, here we go. Here's opening a can of worms you don't want to get me started on. I have a couple but the biggest and longest running is without a doubt William Moseley and there's a long and funny story behind this. Okay, so when I was in second grade, we read The Lion, The Witch, and The Wardrobe as a class and did project assignments on it and shit (one of which I distinctly remember was that we had to draw a scene from the book so I chose the White Witch on her sleigh but for some reason the word "sledge" made me instantly think of "ledge" so it was basically a really shitty drawing of the White Witch flying through the sky on one of those construction beams??? It was really freaking weird, man). We watched the BBC version in class and I remember as the credits were rolling, my teacher shut off the TV screen and announced to us that Disney was releasing it's own version of the movie that Christmas so when the time came around, I had my mom go take me to see it because I liked the book enough to buy an entire boxed set at the next book fair and have always been a Disney freak so I was like "Let's fucking do it." So we went to the theater and I was having a good time enjoying myself and whatnot and then the battle scene came and I was honestly so thrown for a loop. Here I was, little eight year old me, terrified of how intense it was. I was shaking and horrified and I dragged my mom out of the theater. It was awful. I almost didn't go back to see it again but I felt unsatisfied having not seen the rest of the movie so I had her take me back, determined to sit through the entire thing this time. I still ended up covering my face during the battle scenes but when I finally did peek through my fingers, there on the huge silver screen was none other than Peter freaking Pevensie slaying a bunch of poor unfortunate souls and looking like a sexy mofo in the process. Instant heart eyes. And so the madness began. I kept it a secret for a little while before one day, my parents and I were at one of the Disney resorts (it was either the Beach Club or the Boardwalk Hotel, I don't remember which-- it was whichever one that has Cape May Cafe because I think we ate in there for dinner or something). At the front desk, they had those Disney Adventures mini magazines and so I got a free one and guess who was on the cover for that month? William freaking Moseley. There was an interview on the inside, too, that I thought must've been fate because it was smack dab in the middle and there was a cardstock ad right between the two pages so you could easily flip to the thing. The whole thing about my crush got out among my friends at school pretty quickly (when I told them, for a second they thought I had a crush on a kid in one of the other classes named Peter) and the Narnia thing just kind of took off. It waxed and waned over the years but the biggest comeback wasn't until eighth grade. I was on Thanksgiving break and my parents were flipping through the channels when they found Prince Caspian on TV. By then, I had kind of forgotten about Narnia and was like "Oh yeah, I remember this movie! I loved these movies!" and so I sat down and watched the rest of it and that's when everything came flooding back. I spiraled into a pit of insanity and quickly gained a reputation as "that Narnia girl." My freshman year binder was a Narnia shrine with William Moseley pictures pasted all over it. I followed him on social media (which wasn't as big a thing before) and dreamed about him constantly and thought any and all little coincidences were proof that we were meant to be together (even if he is ten years older than me). But I mean, I was a kid. What the hell do I know? Things actually ended up getting a little too far, though. When I found out William Moseley had started dating his Run costar Kelsey Chow, I was 110% heartbroken. Like, I was watching Prince Caspian the one night and just broke down in hysterical tears during the end credits because oh my god we would never be together now and I was so jealous that she was dating him and not me. It was honestly probably getting a little unhealthy so that's when I decided to end the entire Narnia thing once and for all because I had spiraled far too deep and needed to separate myself from the concept. I took a few long years away from the thing before cautiously getting sucked back in about a year and a half ago, I guess it was. I didn't want to get back into Narnia, initially, because I knew that would mean reacquainting myself with the whole William Moseley thing and I didn't want to spiral back into that pit again. I felt like a recovering alcoholic getting invited to a bar. I wanted to go, but I didn't want to relapse. I guess in a way I sort of did for a short period of time there? This time I was more cautious to separate the character from the actor, though, and so far it's been doing pretty well. The only time I almost slipped was when I was this close to being an extra in The Little Mermaid and meeting him, but it didn't work out because school got in the way of my traveling to Savannah for the filming. My heart still hurts a little bit seeing that carnival scene and knowing I could've been one of the faces in that crowd. But anyways, yeah. I think it's safe to say William Moseley was definitely my biggest and probably my most detrimental celebrity crush??? It's all water under the bridge now, pretty much. I still have the Narnia fanfics but I'm not as overwhelmingly gaga for him as I once was now that I have my own boyfriend and life is great. I realize now that this explanation was probably way longer than it needed to be but oh well. Whatever. It was worth typing all out.

50. The Chronicles of Narnia or Lord of the Rings: The Chronicles of Narnia. Lord of the Rings is good and all but I kept zoning out during the movies and never dared to read the books (TOLKIEN, YOU SPEND LIKE FIFTEEN PAGES DESCRIBING ONE TREE. COOL IT, BRO). I think the above explanation shows how pretty obvious the Narnia bias is here, though.

51. In the car, radio or phone playlist: Phone. I never get the aux cord but when I do, it's a lot of alternative rock. I have lots of playlists for different moods or themes, though, like one of all songs that remind me of my boyfriend in some way, calming songs, "fuck yes" songs that make me wanna headbang and break a window, shit like that. Plus, phone playlists are portable so that's nice.

52. Favorite Disney Princess? Rapunzel! She was the first princess I really felt a strong connection to and I honestly wish I would've had her in my life as a little girl. I will forever be a massive Tangled nut, though, and literally nothing feels better than being able to run around dressed as my favorite princess and living out my dreams. I feel so free and overwhelmingly happy when I cosplay Rapunzel. She's like my happy place and a lot of the time, I find myself having to pry myself away from her sometimes so I can give attention to my other cosplays. Like a super strong magnet, though, I always gravitate straight back to Rapunzel. I will never not love my beautiful little sunshine princess <3 <3 <3

Tagging: no one because this was way too long and I sure as hell am not tagging 52 people. Do it if you want to but I'm not recruiting half a hundred people to fill out these questions that I thought way too much about.

[sevtravels-blog]

day nineteen

day nineteen started in Zurich and ended in a town near Solothurn called Biberist. This was a crazy travel day... LET ME TELL YOU. So the day started our easily enough, we checked out of the hotel with no front desk by placing a blue chip that we used as our key into a hole in the wall - no joke. We then took all our luggage and took a train from Zurich to Solothurn, and then another train from Solothurn to Oberdorf. The stop in Oberdorf was literally on the side of a mountain with a cute little wooden platform. Jono and I arrived there - hiking boots, exercise pants, rain jackets and hats on and ready to rumble & HIKE - with two huge back packs on and a roller suitcase We came to Oberdorf station to take a gondola up a mountain, Weissenstein aka 'white mountain' which is the neighbourhood mountain of where Jeanine and Christian grew up - near Bern. We arrived at the gondola and it was pretty rainy, cold and completely deserted. We weren't even sure if the gondola was operational because it wasn't moving! We stressed out for a couple minutes and then knocked on a window with some guys behind it - he said yes it was operational and to go upstairs and get some tickets - he clearly had no time for dumbass Canadian tourists with massive backpacks and Patagonia/MEC gore-tex jackets - oh well! The lady upstairs who sold tickets was the SWEETEST lady, and let us store our bags in her office while we hiked around on top of the mountain. We had our Swiss passes, which gave us access to any mode of transportation within Switzerland from the 19-21 of may. Best. Decision. Of. The. Whole. Trip. We took the gondola up, went into the hotel up there and chatted with the front desk lady who gave us a map, some encouragement, and sent us on our merry way. It was 4 degrees Celsius on the top of the mountain, windy and misty, so it wasn't prime hiking weather - however, BC didn't raise no quitters - we powered through and got into the trees and walked along the ridge parallel to the lower trail down in the open mountain air and space. We saw HUGE snails, HUGE slugs and a couple cute country mice! It was a beautiful walk, the ground was very soft, and the rain and wind didn't reach us through the trees After a while we descended down into the open mountain valley and ended up, I don't know how - it's actually embarrassing, inside a cow field that was lined by electric fences. ALL AROUND US. So, what else could we do but to cautiously approach them and quickly smack our fingers against it to see if they would shock us - actually Jono did cause I was too much of a chicken. The first couple we tested were not electric so we climbed under those, by this time the rain was coming down hard and the wind was picking up, after we got through the first fence we were still completely blocked by them on all sides, so we tested another - and it was electric and shocked Jono. After this I was laughing way to hard to take anything seriously, so we had to take a chill for a couple minutes and compose ourselves! After that Jono hoisted me over one of the posts that the wire was attached too and hopped over himself. THEN we headed to Hinter Weissenstein, which had a cute little restaurant in it, and we took refugee there. No one spoke English there, so the owner had to go and get her daughter to take our order, and then a super nice Swiss guy came over to us and helped translate the very confusing menu - clearly not a lot of tourists come that way, especially not on a day like today. We had some tea, coffee, salad and soup - all delicious, and then as we were paying the bill it started to SNOW. We layered up again, and then headed out to walk to the mid station of the gondola, this took about 30/40 mins, and for the most past, the path was in the trees, with mist in front of us and beautiful budding deciduous trees and white flowers along the side of the path. We made it to the gondola, went down to the main station, picked up our bags from the lovely Swiss lady, and then waited for the train at the Oberdorf platform. We saw the train coming out of the tunnel just before the platform, but then realized that the track changed and it was on the opposite side of the platform - the side where it had originally dropped us off at - we thought it would be the other side cause it was going in the opposite direction - but apparently not!!! Jono swung on his 55lbs backpack and started sprinting to the other side, which was through a tunnel under the tracks and up stairs to the other side - and I pulled my backpack on and grabbed my rolling one and tore after him THANKFULLY we think the train driver took pity on us cause he may have saw us on the other side of the tracks and we made the train - PHEW THEN, we took the train back to Solothurn and then another to Bern - the plan was to meet Christians girlfriend Cathy at the station in Bern at 5/5:30. This had been the plane at 9:30am in the morning, aka the last time I had wifi and could receive messages - however. Going from Solothurn to Bern was not smart, because the second stop from Solothurn was Biberist - the atop which Christian and Cathy live at! Br the plan was to meet in Bern so we took the 40 min train into the city. As soon as we got off, my phone connected to the stations wifi, and I got like 6 missed messages and a WhatsApp call that said we should stay in Solothurn because Christian works there and Cathy was tying to meet us in Biberist! Anyways. We ended up taking the rain BACK to Biberist, and got off at that stop - from there Cathy told us to take a bus! HOWEVER, when we got off the train in Biberist, we see Cathy RUNNING towards the train and pounding on the button to let her on She looked at me, I looked at her, and she was like SEVERIN?? And I said YES and she was like GET BACK ON THE TRAIN!!! - we had never met before so this was a complete fluke that our timing lined up on the train platform and that we recognized each other from WhatsApp pictures!! So we hop back on the train and take it one more stop - back into Solothurn, hope on a bus, and then end up at their apartment. Talk about transit drama. SO, we got to their apartment, very lovely and comfortable, we dropped our bags, ate some paprika chips, had some ice tea, ate a plateful of cheese, and then had some showers. Cathy made us a delicious meal of salad and rösti, basically shredded and fried potatoes and onions, chicken for Jono and her, and an egg on top of the rösti de me! It was absolutely delicious ♥️ After that we relaxed a bit more, had some more snacks - dessert ones, and then Christian and Keanines dad came over to say hello and we went on a quick walk to get a good vantage point to see the alps! They were gorgeous and rugged and covered in snow ❄️ After that we went home and watched Christian in the Swiss championship 10k run which was being streamed through a website! After we watched it Peter left and Jono and I chilled for the rest of the night. Phew! Busy first full day in Switzerland!