#seriously i tried to look up sun bunnies everywhere

[little-pup-pip]

Sun Bunny Moodboard please? (Totally not biased-)

Here you go!!

[twdeadfanfic]

Bonded to you Pt.8

Daryl Dixon x Reader

Chapter: 8/17

Words: 2949

Updated on Mondays

Summary:  Daryl and reader had a something while they both stayed at the Sanctuary after the Saviours were defeated, a secret sort of relationship, that reader wanted to make something more. However, after Rick blows the bridge, Daryl leaves her without a word, unaware of her being pregnant with his child and it’s not after almost two years that Daryl finds out he has a child…and his anger at reader for not having told him before, rivals with reader’s anger at having being tossed aside as nothing by him those to years ago...will they be able to put aside their hurt feelings and resenment, for their kid? Will maybe be able to pick up their relationship again?

Dad Daryl, cute fluffy baby-toddler moments, angsty/awkward reader relationship.

You can find more chapters and  Daryl fics in my masterlist.

Last chapter, Daryl and reader went with their kid to the beach at Oceanside were reader used to leave, spending a couple of awkward days as a “family”, and Daryl voiced to reader his concerns about his daughter not understanding that he is her father, since he’d been missing from her life.

As Daryl had assured you, you three reached Alexandria before the sun went down. You had agreed with Daryl on meeting the next afternoon to take Naia to the park together, and so when you heard a knock on the door, you knew it was him. “Hey,” you greeted as you both looked down awkwardly, and Daryl followed you to the living-room where Naia was playing.

“Look, Naia, Daryl’s here.” The little girl was already grinning and waving at Daryl. “I mean…dad’s here.” You had assured Daryl that Naia would just know that he was her father, and so you had decided to start trying to call him dad to her. Naia looked at you and then at Daryl, and you weren’t sure she understood what you meant. “Yes, dad’s coming with us to the park.” You tried again when Naia pointed at Daryl, and she blinked at him.

“Dadyl.”

Well. Not what you were expecting, at all. Yeah, you guessed the name Daryl was close to Dadyl, and Naia heard people calling him Daryl everywhere, yourself too… You almost snorted hearing her babbling that, though, couldn’t help it, but you didn’t when you looked at Daryl. He seemed so lost, like he didn’t know what to do.

“Okay let’s…let’s go to the park,” you chimed in, trying not to make a big deal.

“Yeah…yeah, come on sweetheart,” Daryl finally spoke, though his smile seemed sad. “I can be Dadyl, why not…”

“Wanna hold dad’s hand while we walk?” You tried again, feeling lost, kind of silly, and a bit guilty, all at the same time. Naia just nodded, stumbling towards Daryl, who reached down to hold her hand, and at least that had him smiling a bit more.

Once in the park, Gracie was there with Aaron, and Naia smiled and pointed at them, and so you three made your way to them.

“Hi there,” Aaron greeted, smiling, when you three sat down next to him and Gracie. “How was Oceanside.”

“It was great! We had a lot of fun at the beach, yeah?” You said and Naia smiled when she heard the word beach, though she was distracted with a pony toy that Gracie had shown her. That was another good thing of Alexandria, people seemed to have a stash of some toys, somehow.

“And you got a beautiful necklace, Naia!” Aaron said, and Naia looked at him, when she heard her name. “Pretty,” Aaron repeated, pointing at the necklace, and that time Naia got it, grinning and nodding, and she pointed at Daryl. “Oh, Daryl made it?”

“Yeah, Naia got a pretty skillful dad.” You peeked at Daryl, who wasn’t saying anything, seeming awkward.

“Dadyl,” Naia babbled, looking at him.

You heard Aaron snort at it. He seemed a bit puzzled, and you wanted the earth to swallow you, though probably not as much as you guessed Daryl wanted it, but he was still silent. Naia gave Gracie the pony back and crawled towards Daryl, tugging at his sleeve.

“Yes, sweetheart?” Daryl asked softly, and at least Naia got him smiling a bit again. She pointed at the slide. “You wanna go to the slide, okay, come on.” He got up, helping Naia onto her feet, and held her hand.

“Me,” Gracie said, stumbling onto her feet, and Daryl looked at Aaron to see if it was okay, holding Gracie’s hand too when he nodded, helping them walk to the slide.

Aaron got up to go with them and you rushed onto your feet, tugging at his arm, hoping to talk with him without Daryl noticing now that he was hands full with the two little girls.

“Wait, wait, can we speak?” You asked quietly.

“Sure…” Aaron frowned at you, confused.

“Could you…could you talk with Daryl…”

“About what?” Aaron just seemed more confused.

“You’re his friend and you’re a father too, and…well, Daryl’s worried thinking that Naia’s not going to think of him as her father because she didn’t meet him until now. I’m trying to get her to call him dad, but all I got was…that,” you began to explain. “But I think she’s going to know either way, she’s not going to remember when he wasn’t with her, she’ll just know…right?”

“I guess…” Aaron still seemed confused, but he gave you a kind smile.

“So if you could…talk to Daryl about it…maybe…” You chewed on your lip.

“Okay, okay, I can try…I’m not sure I have something helpful to say or that he will listen…but…” Aaron shrugged, smiling, even if he seemed a bit as lost as you felt. “I’ll try.”

“Thank you, Aaron, really…I’m kind of lost in this area…”

Aaron just clapped your shoulder softly. “You’re doing good, and I always knew Daryl’d be a great dad.”

“Yeah, yeah, he is.”

*

Later, you asked Daryl to walk with you and Naia back to your place, and then left them reading on the living room while you made some quick dinner, coming back when you finished.

“Alright sweetheart, your dinner is ready,” you said and Naia looked at you and smiled. “Say goodbye to dad,” you tried again, still a bit awkwardly, waving at Daryl to catch Naia’s attention, and she imitated you, waving to Daryl too. “Say, bye dad. Bye dad.”

“Bye dad,” she babbled and you couldn’t believe it, stopping in place and grinning. You looked at Daryl, but he wasn’t looking as happy as you thought he might.

“Bye, sweetheart,” he said with a small smile. “I’ll see you tomorrow, yeah?” Daryl reached out and you knew he wanted to maybe hold her, but it seemed as if he didn’t dare, he still seemed hesitant with her sometimes, and so he just stroked her hair softly, and his smile went a bit bigger when Naia smiled at him.

“Darling, I’ll be back in a minute, okay?” You said to Naia as you followed Daryl outside. “Hey! I told you she’d get it!” You were still grinning, though your smile faltered, you didn’t know why he didn’t look happy.

“She doesn’t.”

“But…but…” you stumbled, confused. “But she just said it.”

“She just repeats what you say, Y/N.” Daryl shrugged. “Doesn’t mean she gets it.”

“No…no, she does! She will! She said that, and she knows what’s a dad, so…” Or at least you thought so.

“Guess when she’s older and can understand it, I can just explain it to her, or something…” Daryl muttered.

“No, I’m telling you, she’ll get it before that,” you insisted, stubborn, but you were honestly sure of it. You honestly didn’t think this was such a big deal as Daryl seemed to think, but you understood him and didn’t want to dismiss his feelings. “When she thinks back to you, she’s going to always think of you as her dad, she’s still a baby.”

“Maybe it’s better this way,” Daryl muttered and you looked at him, puzzled.

“What?”

“Me as a dad…” Daryl shook his head, scoffing.

“What you mean?” You frowned. “You are a great dad.” Daryl arched an eyebrow at you at that. “Seriously, Daryl, you are. You’re great with kids and Naia adores you, and you’re a really good dad.”

“Never thought I’d be a dad at all.” He muttered.

“Yeah, well…was a surprise for me too, let me tell you…” You chuckled sadly. “But you aren’t backing out from it now, not now that Naia’s so fond of you…not that you could, she has you all wrapped around her finger already.” You joked awkwardly.

“I would never leave her.”

“I know.” You nodded, if there was one thing true in the world, it was that.

“Just…I just wish…if you hadn’t left…”

“Yeah, but I left.” Your sadness and guilt made you snap. You knew that Daryl was just worried, that he was struggling to find his way in this sudden fatherhood situation he had found himself in, but you had also had to struggle and find your way alone in the sudden motherhood situation you had found yourself in. “And you left, too.”

“I didn’t know you were carrying her!” He snapped too and you took a deep breath, trying to control your emotions.

“Can we…We’ve been weeks without fighting…can we please go back to that?” You let out a sigh. You didn’t think you could go back to the fighting and yelling, and Daryl and you just went in circles about the same thing every time, you were never going to solve it, there was no solution, and Naia was better off when you two weren’t fighting and were in an awkward, coexisting situation.

“Yeah…I’m sorry.” Daryl seemed defeated too.

“I’m sorry too… We’ll see you tomorrow at the park, okay?”

“Sure.”

That night, you took Naia with you to the bed, instead of hers, as you did every night. You didn’t know who liked it more, you or her. “You had fun today?” You asked once you were both tucked in. “Gracie is really nice, yes?” Naia nodded, smiling to you.

“And her dad, Aaron, he’s nice too, he’s a good friend of mine,” you kept speaking while Naia looked at you. “Aaron is Gracie’s dad right? Like that bunny is the dad of this one.” You pointed at the book that Naia had brought to bed, the one she’d been looking at with Daryl while you made dinner. Naia nodded, and you weren’t really sure she understood, but you hoped so. “And like Daryl is your dad.”

“Dadyl…” Naia babbled softly and you let out a sigh, you didn’t know if you were making progress or not, you still thought Naia was going to see Daryl as her father either way, but you wanted her to call him dad and ease Daryl’s mind about it.

“Your dad loves you very much,” you whispered, kissing her forehead before placing the book on the nightstand table and curling up to sleep. Naia didn’t say anything, just smiled and snuggled to you. “And I love you very much too.”

“Love you,” Naia babbled back in her own way, as she always did, and no matter what, it always made you smile.

*

The next day at the park, Michonne was there with Judith and RJ, and Naia nodded them to play, painting for a bit and then taking turns in the slide and whirl.

When it was time to go back home, you asked Daryl once again to walk with Naia and you, and he nodded. You had just stepped out of the park when Naia reached out her arms for you. “Are you tired? You asked. “You want me to pick you up?” She nodded and so you scooted her up into your arms. You glanced at Daryl and chewed on your lip before speaking again. “What if dad holds you, would that be okay?”

Naia nodded and so you carefully passed her to Daryl. “Hey, sweetheart,” he said softly, smiling down at her, and Naia grinned, getting comfortable in his arms. They were so cute, you felt another dart in your heart, and you stopped looking at them, walking purposely back home.

Once there, Daryl went to leave Naia down on the carpet of the living room, next to a stack of books so she could choose which one she wanted to read, but before lowering her, he kissed the top of her head, making Naia giggle and grin at him. The image of them and the way in which Daryl was looking at Naia made your heart hurt again, and so you rushed to the kitchen, leaving them alone while you made dinner.

*

You kept going with that routine. You spent your mornings helping on the orchard, and after lunch Naia and you went to the park. Sometimes Daryl met you both there, others he’d go pick you up before you left, and then, when it was time to go back home, he’d walk with Naia and you, and you’d leave them playing or reading until it was time for Naia and you to dine, and Daryl left.

You didn’t know if Aaron had spoken with Daryl or not, but Daryl didn’t bring up the issue of Naia not understanding that he was her father again, and you knew Aaron and Daryl were friends, they were always together at the park doting on their little girls, and Daryl seemed more at ease when Aaron was there, as if he helped him to ease his way into this new fatherhood situation.

You were a bit jealous, wishing you had something like that, a friend to rely on and someone to guide you in this motherhood thing, but you had had the help of all the women on Oceanside both before and after Naia was born, while Daryl hadn’t and had found himself with a toddler all of a sudden. You had Noemi, who was friendly to you and who you hoped to build a friendship with, but it wasn’t the same than what Daryl had either with Michonne or Aaron.

Even if Daryl didn’t say anything else about it, you kept calling Daryl dad when talking to Naia, and she repeated it when you told her to say “hi dad” or anything like that, and you were still sure you didn’t need to do anything special for Naia to know who Daryl was, but it took about two weeks for her to call him dad by herself, without you saying anything.

You were at the porch, knelt down in front of her as you tied her boots, ready to leave for the park, when you heard her voice, calling happily for Daryl.

“Dad!”          

Your fingers froze on her shoe ties for a second when you heard her, surprised, before you looked back and saw Daryl there. He seemed surprised too, wide-eyed as he looked at Naia, frozen in place too. Naia seemed confused as to why you both were like that. She looked at you and pointed at Daryl.

“Yes, honey, dad is here!” You said. You looked at Daryl again, noticing the emotion in his eyes, and he swallowed hard before kicking into motion.

“Hi, sweetheart, are you okay?” Daryl asked and Naia nodded, grinning. You got up, finishing with the boot and giving them space. “Can I hold you?” he asked softly and when Naia nodded, Daryl reached to carefully pick her up and Naia giggled, holding onto him.

You looked away from them, both to try to ease the pain in your heart that you felt when you looked at them together, and also so Daryl couldn’t realize that you had noticed the emotion in his eyes as he almost seemed about to cry, not wanting him to be embarrassed. “Alright, let’s go to the park,” you said, trying to sound nonchalant, as you lead the way.

Later that day, when you finished dinner, you stood at the threshold of the door in silence so Daryl and Naia wouldn’t notice you while they read. You did that sometimes, watching them interact, seeing how day by day they seemed more familiar, how Daryl slowly loosened up around her, seeming less and less unsure and hesitant around her and more at ease, and how Naia enjoyed their time together and the way in which Daryl was with her, everyone could see he adored her.

It was good, you knew, and some part of you felt warm and content looking at them, but it also hurt, it was like seeing the image of what maybe you could have had, if things between Daryl and you had been different, and what you never had.

“Time for dinner,” you announced, taking Naia and Daryl from their bubble as you looked at them. “Say bye-bye to dad.”

“Bye, dad.”

“Alright, see you tomorrow, sweetheart.” Daryl leaned to kiss Naia’s forehead and she giggled. “I love you,” he told her softly.

“Love you,” Naia babbled back, grinning. Daryl kept smiling at her, but you noticed the emotion going through him as Naia said that, his eyes getting wet, and so you looked somewhere else in case he might feel embarrassed. You heard Naia giggling and you guessed Daryl had kissed her or hugged her again, and then you heard him walking to the door.

“Y/N,” he called for you. “Can we speak?”

“Sure…” You frowned, confused, but followed Daryl outside. “There’s something wrong?”

“No, uh…” Daryl looked down, fidgeting. “Thank you.”

“For what?” You blinked, surprised.

“I know you’ve been trying hard to get Naia to call me dad and all that…” He murmured.

“Not that hard, I told you she’d understand it.” You shrugged, you hadn’t expected a thank you. You had just done what you thought you should, no matter what might be going on between Daryl and you, he was Naia’s father and he loved her. With the way he was with Naia, you felt you wanted help him to find his way around parenthood, and to build his relationship with Naia…but looking at them, it didn’t seem like they needed your help for that.

“I meant what I sad that day, you’re a great dad,” you told him and Daryl scoffed. “Seriously. Up to Aaron’s level.”

The corner of Daryl’s lip curled up into a small smile at that, though he didn’t look at you. “You raised her good,” he said quietly, taking you by surprise. “She’s great.”

“She is,” you nodded. “Sometimes I wonder if she’s too good and sweet for this world, but I love that she is…”

“Nah, she’s perfect,” Daryl said and a warm smile spread across your face. “I’ll see you both tomorrow,” he said as he turned to walk away.

“Bye.”

*

Yes, this chapter was absolute and pure fluffy fluff. This is the fic that made my mobile autocorrect change Daryl for Dadyl, and this chapter is dedicated to it. I thought you didn’t find it too silly!

There was progress in Daryl’s and Naia relationship, and also between him and reader...right?

If you liked this and have a moment, please let me know your thoughts. Thanks to everyone who comment, like and reblog, your support really means the world to me!!

As always, excuse my english, it’s not my first language.

Someone else is going to meet Naia next chapter.

A lot of tags are not working and also even if they work a lot of people don’t get notified, so, I always update on monday, maybe check my blog if you don’t get notified because tags didn’t work? Thanks!

If you want to be (un)tagged let me know.

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[hideawayintheimaginationworld]

Um... is it okay if I ask for a short story on how Matt and Spring Jr met Lefty? :\/\/

Matt couldn’t tell what was and wasn’t real anymore. According to the doctor who took care of him at the hospital, he had some sort of severe mental breakdown, that led to the stupid idea that a parasite was living inside him and he had to get it out by cutting himself open.

He did wonder how the hell he got to the hospital, as he remembered that gross little thing looking at him, then everything went dark—

No. No. The doctor said it wasn’t real.

He did also recommend therapy.

Like anything was wrong with him.

The more and more he did think about it, the more and more it seemed to be a nightmare. A bizarre nightmare, one induced by a form of stress, maybe anger psychosis, that was what the hospital psychologist said.

The only reminder was the scar.

The scar was itchy again, Matt had to resist the urge to scratch it like a mad animal, as it was both still sensitive and healing.

He hated looking at it, it reminded him of the thing. It wasn't neat either, in some spots it was darker and more jagged. He wore anything to cover it, baggy shirts usually fixed not having to look at it too long, he tried not to touch it at all.

Another negative? His job put him on leave.

Without pay.

The nerve.

Matt completely erased Springtrap, not wanting to work on the game anymore, he hoped there was another game he could work on at some point but most people hadn’t hired him onboard.

It was just a bad dream, he reminded himself, he popped two pills of a pain reliever in his mouth, not caring that he already had two before, and went outside for the first time in two weeks.

The only thing he wanted was alcohol.

It was the only thing that let him sleep now.

He had to drink himself into a comatose state to get any sleep that wasn’t disturbed.

Meaning he often woke up feeling gross.

He hadn’t seen Jason in a few days, considering how he did help, getting some groceries then left in the beginning, saying he needed to take it easy.

Like he could.

Life wasn’t easy.

He was picking out exactly what he needed and went to the checkout to pay.

“Daddy!!”

That couldn’t be.

No. No. He reasoned, it has to be some other disgusting brat calling for their father.

He was just on edge for no good reason.

He left the store, walking back to his apartment, he kept drifting into flashbacks of everything, it seemed too painful and real to be a dream.

But it couldn’t have been real.

“Excuse me?”

He would just figure out what the hell to do next.

“Excuse me!!”

Matt realised he was being addressed, he turned and saw a red-haired man with very pale skin, something that was strange was the golden eyes he had, they were almost the colour of a setting sun, entrancing in a way. Standing next to him was a teenaged boy, with messy blonde hair and green eyes, the boy stared at him looking kind of annoyed almost. They had been in the same supermarket Matt was just in, as they had shopping bags, the guy even had a backpack strapped to his back.

“Did you drop your wallet?” The man asked him.

“No I didn’t,” Matt curtly answered, hating this guy was stopping from getting home.

“Are you sure you didn’t drop it? I found a black wallet and I think it's yours,” the man was showing him a wallet that looked like his.

Matt reached to his pocket.

Fuck.

It was his wallet.

“Turns out it is, I'll take that,” Matt took it from the man, immediately opening it to check for any lost money.

“Fucking rude.”

Matt was completely taken off guard by the comment.

“What??”

“You're fucking rude,” The man repeated, “Didn't even thank me, I could have stolen your wallet you ungrateful prick.”

“Let it go, walk away...” The teenager grabbed his arm, trying to pull him away. Matt guessed that teen was his son, but they didn’t seem to share any characteristics, aside from both of them being lanky.

“I feel sorry for the people in your life, I've only known you for two minutes and I already hate you, imagine being your mother or some shit, she'd be ashamed of you, asshole,” The guy turned and walked away, the teenager followed him.

Matt huffed, how dare he.

“Daddy!!”

Again? Seriously??

“What is it?”

“Daddy! Daddy!!”

He had the awful realisation that wasn’t his imagination.

He saw the guy and teenager running back to him, Matt suddenly felt like he needed to run, so he did.

Unfortunately, the guy caught up to him quickly, grabbing his shirt collar and stopping him dead in his tracks.

“Shit! Look, I'm sorry if you feel like I was rude.”

“Hey Alec, look it was fauxpology, sound familiar?” The guy asked.

“Yep.”

“Alright, let's see what the rabbit says... I might have found you.”

Found??

“Let me go!!”

“Daddy!”

“You need to come with me.”

“No I don’t,” Matt struggled to pull away.

“Oh yes, you do...” The guy spun him to face him and pressed his hand against his temple.

“Sleep.”

Matt suddenly felt heavy in his legs, drowsy like he was pulling from reality.

Then everything went dark.

“Jesus you didn’t have to put the guy to sleep...”

“I felt like I had no choice...”

“So what are you going to do?”

“The same thing as anyone, I will offer help.”

Matt finally could open his eyes, he was looking at a white ceiling, he wondered if he was in the hospital again and the thought disgusted him.

He looked to the side and saw a blurry black shape, he blinked and it cleared.

“But he talked to you rudely honestly.”

“Well if my theory is correct... he's been through a really awful experience...”

“Lefty, picking up the broken souls everywhere.”

“Hello, Matthew, back with the living are you?”

Matt froze, the black shape turned around and he saw a very familiar golden eye staring at him.

“We need to talk about your son.”

“I don’t have a kid.”

“Explain this,” Matt realised it was like a bear, but a robot, an animatronic, like Springtrap, but he wasn’t so decayed, like he was modern and more aimed at kids, the animatronic turned around and turned back with a familiar sight.

“Hello, Daddy!”

Matt screamed, wanting to get away. Lefty had the little bunny.

The bunny that crawled out of his body, the dirty green fur and the big silver eyes, was looking at him.

“Explain why I found little Spring wandering around the street ten days ago with no adult supervision, covered in dirt, blood and some other strange fluid I couldn’t figure out... But I figured it out!!” The animatronic nodded.

Matt looked horrified, the way it moved was so lifelike like it was a person in the suit.

“The fluid was mucus... disgusting... but I've figured it out, you somehow... got a parasite... and you share DNA in some way.”

“Nah, he was pregnant.”

Matt heard a chorus of laughter.

“That's why you wear protection.”

“Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die.”

“Don’t make fun of him kids,” Lefty placed down the little rabbit.

“Lefty don’t bullshit, the dude was pregnant.”

Matt grumbled, but they had appeared to stop laughing for the most part.

“That's impossible, he's a male, but this is Fazbear Entertainment... that pretty much explains everything and anything... the same brand range that offers getting your body hijacked, losing your body parts, death robots on demand, doll alarm clocks and a mention for the dolls that like crawling in your mouth.”

“You're laughing at me,” Matt sneered.

“Oh, um, no, I believe you, I've dealt with these things before!” The robot answered, “Spring Jr is the less hostile... but you... no one would probably believe you, you most likely believed this was a dream... Spring recognised you somehow...”

“You brought it in public??” Matt asked, he'd be ashamed to have that thing around, and this animatronic seem to adopt him, “Who are you anyway??”

“He was in my backpack, as was another robot called Helpy, they were helping me shop... now my name is Lefty, Matthew.”

“How... how do you know my name?”

“Your wallet. Drivers License,” Lefty answered.

“Where am I?”

“This is my house.”

“Bullshit.”

“No it is, the kids will tell you.”

Matt looked around, he was laying on a sofa, he then saw different kids, he could see the teenager with blonde hair, but he also saw a teenager with brown hair with a strange dog sitting next to him, another teen with dark skin and a thick black hair, and two teenaged girls, one with black straight hair and the other more chubby... and missing an arm by the looks of it.

“They look like their mother’s probably...”

Everyone soured immediately.

“You're filthy,” Lefty said, “Did adoption ever come into your stupid head?” He gave him a knock on his head, “Is anyone awake in there??”

Before he had any time to recover, Lefty grabbed his shirt collar and held him up easily, looking at him with disgust, “Don’t you dare imply I do that, ever,” He dropped him down.

“Now... I'm offering you this... a form of therapy... technically Spring Jr is your kid. This is my offer, we can talk, you tell me how this happened, but you must take a part in fixing this, you didn’t just.... magically get pregnant—”

The kids were laughing again, this time they were almost howling, Matt growled, and he was ready to scream at the horrible teenagers, having a bad enough day, when Lefty looked at him with a demented face, his eyes were black and a sharp white pupil was glaring into his soul, making him shrink back and feel weak.

“You leave my kids alone, or I will make sure you never talk again.”

Lefty turned to them, “Kids, stop laughing for a minute... I understand it's amusing to you like a bad fan-fiction or whatever you call them... but Matt cut himself open to pull that thing out... it's trauma... while I wouldn’t normally...”

He turned back to Matt, “Conditions: You live here, you get help, understand?”

[punkcupcakestyles]

Love Song

Part 13

Catch Up!

“How’s Camille, Harry?”

“Greedy, ain’t he?”

“Well, when you have that face, mate, girls just don’t care.”

The words were still ringing in my ears, even though days had gone by. 

We were back in L.A., and I was back at my house. I didn’t go to his house, I mumbled excuses and went back home, to Cat and my mom. To Sam. 

That was always the plan, to go to Sam, to follow him wherever he went. I was supposed to go to Stanford while he went to UCLA and we were going to visit each other every weekend, go to San Francisco and Las Vegas. We were supposed to live college life like there was nothing else after it. And somehow, someday, he was supposed to realize that I was it for him. I was the one he was looking for. That he loved me almost as much as I loved him (I had come to terms with the fact that I was always going to love him more). 

And then, that night happened and my life turned upside down. 

It could’ve been worse, I guess.

“Your sister wore me off,” Sam complained as soon as he let himself plop down on the bed. 

The mattress shifted its weight and the mascara wand ended up poking my cheek as a result. I scowled, but Sam didn’t notice. He had his face buried into the pillow and his long arms and legs spread open over my covers as if he were a tiny, tired star. 

“Fuck, Sam!”

“Sorry,” he muttered at the same time he rose on his elbows to look at me. “You still look pretty. Where are you going?”

There was a certain edge on his voice as if he already knew the answer to his question and he disapproved of it. I peered down and poked my tongue out at him as he rolled onto his back, drumming his fingers on his tummy as he waited for my answer. 

“Dump his ass.”

“Sam...”

“No, for real, tell him to go fuck himself and dump his ass.”

“I will think about it, Sam. Now stop.”

Sam didn’t know, Sam couldn’t know. The moment he did, he wouldn’t look at me the same way. And I couldn’t stand that. 

“In this outfit?” I asked him, as I tried to remove the black smudge over my cheek. I looked down at myself, at the dark blue cotton shorts and the lavender lace of the teddy I was wearing. I had gotten it as a gift from a brand that wanted me as their ambassador, but I had never really had a use for it, up until now. “I’m going to the library.” Sam was still frowning. He was always frowning lately. “I need to take some photos for my IG. I’m gonna take it off right away.”

“Oh,” he muttered, and I felt a tinge of guilt in his voice. Not enough to say sorry, though. 

I pushed my makeup to the side, and let my fingers run through my hair to mess it up a bit, so it wouldn’t look perfectly sleek. My makeup was dewy and rosy, long lashes and glossy lips as if I had barely done something to my face instead of wearing a ridiculous amount of creams and balms and powders. It looked like I was in the middle of the golden hour when in reality it was past 8 and the sun had already set. 

I had definitely not woken up like this. 

I took a few pictures, trying to pose sexily casual, if that’s a thing, and making silly faces to the camera so I wouldn’t take myself so seriously. It was something I did from time to time, so my Instagram feed wouldn’t just be random pictures. 

Sam burst into giggles as he looked at me and took the phone away from me so he could snap a couple of pictures himself. I posed shyly, now that he was the one doing it, and he handed me my phone back once he was finished, with the photo already chosen. It was simple, I was looking at the camera with my lips slightly parted in a coy smile, and my hand on my neck. My eyes were cast down, and my nose was a little bit scrunched up, so I looked nice and happy.

“That’s the one you should post. You look beautiful,” he mumbled, and I managed to offer him half a smile, feeling my tummy bubble softly with his words.

“Thank you.” I took my phone back and went to post it on Instagram with a quick 🖤 as a caption, before I put it on my bed and fell back on the bed and lie next to him, so close that the tip of our noses was almost touching. 

“Are you gonna tell me what’s wrong?” I asked him softly and he rolled his eyes in response, attempting to get up from the bed before I pulled him back. “Sam.”

He was in a mood, bitter, sour, unbearable. He was lucky I liked him. 

“Annie broke up with me,” he muttered, avoiding my eyes as he did so.

“Oh,” I said. Oh. “When?”

“About a week ago. When I saw the photos of Harry with his ex.”

“Why would she break up with you because of that? That’s none of her business.”

“She said I cared too much.”

“You’re my best friend!!”

“She doesn’t think that’s the only thing going on.”

He finally looked at me and his eyes shone with worry. He seemed like a little kid, hopeful and scared at the same time. Hopeful I might feel the same. Scared I would laugh at him. He didn’t say anything, he didn’t need to, and neither did I. 

Fuck. Fuck. 

I couldn’t think of anything to say, nothing good, at least. I blinked and gulped, looking him stupidly in the eyes as he waited for me. To do what?

This is what I had wanted my whole life. Why wasn’t I jumping on the opportunity?

The sound of the phone almost made me jump out of my skin and I sat up, darting to it to give myself something to do. Harry’s name popped onto the screen and I rolled my lips into my mouth, wondering if I should answer his FaceTime call. Sam waited for me to decide, scoffing as I pushed the green button to take the call. Shut up, I warned with my eyes. 

Deep breaths. 

“Hi,” Harry smiled to the screen, widely and sweetly and I felt myself melt at the sight of him. 

God, I had missed him. It was the first time I was seeing his face, his actual face (he was everywhere, even if his album was not out yet) in a week, and I thought I knew just how much I had missed him every single day, but I was now realizing I had missed him so much more. “How are you, baby?”

Confused would be the right answer. 

“Good.” He was wearing some sort of hoodie, light blue and plush, and his dimpled smile and his bunny teeth made him look adorable. I could see Sam out of the corner of my eyes, and I shifted uncomfortably as he got up from the bed. 

“I’m gonna help Cat with dinner,” Sam muttered, loud enough to be heard. It didn’t matter if he had done it on purpose, cause Harry had notice and the sweetness on his face slowly disappeared.

“Who was that?”

“Uh...Sam.” I shifted on the bed, looking uncomfortable as Harry looked back.

“He’s there?”

No, that was a hologram. Jesus.

“He is, he stayed here while I was away.”

“You’re already back…”

“Harry…”

He looked pissed but didn’t say anything. Instead, he took a deep breath and let his tongue sweep over his lips.

“Come here tonight,” he finally said. 

“I-I can’t.”

“Why not?” 

Cause I had to figure things out. Cause I couldn’t offer him all of my attention. Cause there was a chance Sam loved me back. 

Did I love Sam? 

Fuck. 

“I was thinking about spending the night with my mom and sister.”

“And Sam,” he smirked and I rolled my eyes in response. “Let’s do something, yeah? Spend the night with them and come sleep here. I miss you.”

“I, uh, I’ll see what I can do, H.”

“That’s not a big promise, S.”

“I’m sorry, I have to go and help with dinner. I’ll let you know, yeah?”

He was displeased with my answer, rolling his bottom lip into his mouth and gnawing on the inside of his cheek. His jaw was set and he looked away from me for a second before he nodded. We said short goodbyes, and I grunted as soon as the call ended, and dropped the phone away from me so I could bury myself into the sheets.

I felt bad, so fucking bad. All I wanted to do was to go him and hide my face onto the crook of his neck.

But I also wanted to find out what was happening to Sam. 

Harry’s smile was gone too quickly, I didn’t get a chance to enjoy it. 

***

I put on a hoodie and went down to the first floor, to join my family in the kitchen. It was a mess, Cat had decided to do chocolate pudding and carbonara pasta from scratch so there was flour everywhere and an explosion of melted chocolate was stuck on the wall. I was pretty sure she had broken an egg on the floor. 

“You’re late,” she accused me, and she looked like a ghost with her face plastered with flour. 

“I’m sorry,” I mumbled, side-eyeing Sam as he busied himself with the boiling milk. “I got distracted. What do you need me to do?”

“Fry the bacon and beat the eggs,” she ordered and I put myself to work, trying to avoid Sam as much as I could. But still, big as the kitchen was, it didn’t seem big enough for the two of us. 

My mom came home, still wearing her scrubs from the hospital, she looked so happy to see him, as if he were family and that was his natural place to be. She went to take a shower and came back with a big, satisfied smile just as we were serving dinner. 

It was a big, happy family dinner, even though the pudding was clumpy and that the eggs had cooked a little in the pasta sauce. It was easy to forget the problems of the day or the fact that Sam kept looking at me as if he wanted to figure me out. 

“So, when are you gonna bring your boyfriend home?” My mom asked she was finished and I looked at her and then at Sam nervously. 

“We…mmm...He’s not my boyfriend, mom. We’re just hanging out.”

“That’s not what the gossip sites say,” Cat mocked and I turned to look at her with my eyes big like plates. “What? They say you went to London so his ex would stay away. Did you really chase her with a knife?”

“I did not! Stop reading those shitty things and read a real book instead!” 

Cat shrugged her shoulders as my mom gave her a warning look. The thing about Cat was that she was less afraid of us as time went by and she grew older. I guess that’s what happens when you have a mother that’s put together with tape on her broken parts and a sister that’s about to crack. 

“Your sister did not chase anyone with a knife, that’s not the way we raised you, and we don’t beg for love,” my mom said sweetly. 

“Well…” Cat started, but suddenly shut up and whipped her head to look at Sam. She grew red and cast her eyes down as she filled her mouth with some more pudding. 

I was pretty sure what she was going to say. We all were. It was a good thing Sam had stopped her, cause I would’ve had to kill her. 

Dinner was done soon enough and Cat looked to suck up to my mom by helping her with the dishes, while Sam and I went upstairs. 

“Thanks…” I whispered when we reached my door and I leaned onto it, with my palms behind my back. 

“It’s alright,” he smiled. “She would’ve regretted it anyway.”

He barely managed to finish before I kiss him. My fingers pushed into his hair and I brought his closer, which he took as an opportunity to press me to the door. 

It was a nice kiss, more than nice, intense and slow, as I enjoyed the taste of his lips. They were sweet and juicy, just as I had always imagined them.

But the world was still there, I was aware that my mom was downstairs, and that Sam’s hands were looking for a way to sneak under my hoodie. It hadn’t disappeared around us, just like it did when Harry kissed me. 

I slowly pulled apart from him and he untangled his arms from around me. I turned around and opened the door to my room while Sam stood there, his brain probably pounding with a million questions about what had just happened. I knew mine was. 

“Sof…” Sam spoke softly and I turned around as I was about to close the door, to look at him. “Let me in.”

No. 

“Oh, no, you’ll have to wine me and dine me first, Sammy,” I tried to mock, but it came out flat and Sam’s brows furrowed deeply, as he took a step closer so no one else would listen to us. Fuck, my mom and Cat could come up at any second.

“What about Harry? You told me he was your boyfriend…”

“He is…” I nodded, biting the corner of my lips as a sudden feeling of shame filled my chest. Fuck. “It’s, uh, it’s complicated.”

“Do you love him?”

“Go to your room, Sam. We’ll talk tomorrow, yeah?” 

He finally nodded and turned around to go to his room, that was by the end of the hallway. He had always had a room at my place, it was the least I could do after he left us crash at his tiny apartment when we just got to L.A. When my mom was more a robot than a person and I worked as a waitress so we could eat. When I was still afraid every time I heard a police siren, and I saw blood in my nightmares every night.

Fuck me. 

***

@TeenVogue: Imagine looking THIS good🔥🔥🔥🔥

@Sarah1980.: Harries out there be thinking this chick can turn a gay man straight. He likes dick, ma’am.

@MikeG: Only reason I will be watching the new Marvel Era.

@Selenass: Those lips Kylie Jenner could never 💁🏽‍♀️

@pinkbae: 🤡🤡🤡🤡

***

I needed to come to terms with the fact that I wasn’t going to sleep that night.

I kept watching reruns of Law and Order: SVU and I turned the TV from time to time and closed my eyes to see if I could fall asleep. But I tossed and turned on the bed, snapping my eyes open to go back to Olivia Benson and her not-so-calming stories. 

I had fucked up, I was aware of that. I kept coming back to the moment when I decided to kiss Sam, to the pressure of his lips on mine and the sweet taste of the pudding on his tongue. I scrunched up my eyes and buried my face onto the pillow, so it would muffle my groans

I needed to see Harry. 

It was an idiotic idea, but it was well established by now that I was a fucking idiot. I was still wearing the lavender teddy and the blue shorts, so I just put on a gigantic hoodie before I left my room. I hadn’t snuck out of my house in the middle of the night in a long while and I tried to be as silent as possible, stealing Sam’s keys on my way to the door. 

I took Sam’s car and drove around the familiar routes of my neighborhood. I was good there, I felt almost confident even though I was a terrible driver, the problem was when I had to leave the comfort of my zone. Soon enough, I was parking in front of Harry’s house and I pulled out my phone, begging that he would be awake so I wouldn’t have to go back home. 

You up? I wrote.

@H: It’s so late for a booty call. I feel almost used. 

I’m outside your door. 

@H: Oh, so literally a booty call? gimme a moment, I’m naked. 

I didn’t need to know that. 

@H: I’m gonna get naked again as soon as we enter the house, just so you know. 

I smiled for the first time that night, looking at the screen while I thought of something to reply. A billion things came to mind, but I settled with staring at the screen and smiling like an idiot at his words.  Oh, how I wished I was bold. 

The garage soon started to slide open and I tried and failed to start the engine again. I could see Harry standing by the driveway and looking at me with his arms crossed over his chest and a mocking smile on his face, as he saw me struggle for a bit with the car.

“Hi,” I smiled shyly when I finally parked in front of him and rolled down the window to look at him with big, sorrowful eyes, so he wouldn’t have any other choice but to agree to whatever I wanted. “Can I sleep here?”

I had learned that trick from Cat. 

Harry’s hair was messy and he wasn’t wearing a shirt, only his sweatpants that hung low on his hips. He didn’t seem like he had just woken up, he looked divine. It was almost sinful how good he looked. 

“Sure,” he smiled as he leaned into the door and looked down at me with eyes full of curiosity. “but you do know it past 3 am, right?” He asked. A mop of curls fell over his forehead and I had to restrain myself from the need to touch it. 

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, biting my lips as I looked at him. “Should I go back?”

Harry chuckles rumbled in his bare chest and he stood straight to open the door. His eyes made their way down my body as I stepped down from the car and I was painfully aware of the fact that I was barely wearing any clothes. Neither of us had seemed to have gotten the memo of how freaking cold the dawn was going to be. 

“I didn’t know you drove,” he said.

“I don’t. This is Sam’s car. I kinda stole it.”

Like a petulant child, Harry’s rolled his eyes at the mention of Sam’s name and I smiled, pressing my cold fingers to the nape of his neck to bring him closer so I could kiss him, softly, sweetly. The weight of his body pressed up to me, trapping against the car as one of his arms went around my waist.

It was all I wanted to do, all I had been thinking that night: His kisses and the way the world seemed to blur around its edges when he was close to me. He took over my mind and every one of my senses, and a warm feeling settled in my tummy. It was like nothing I had felt before and I was pretty sure that I was probably not going to feel it after he was gone. 

I was starting to think that everyone else would have to compare to him. 

“We should fuck in this car,” he muttered as soon he broke the kiss and I giggled, still pressed up to him, still refusing to let him go. His forehead was against mine and his warm breath rose little goosebumps on my skin, but he looked dead serious about his offer. 

“Why would we do that?”

“So he knows you’re mine.”

“Am I?” I smirked. 

“Yes.”

“Sam’s just a friend,” I said, pushing the kiss we had shared deep into my mind, just for now. I would deal, with whatever that was, later.

“We both know that’s not true.”

That was the perfect moment to tell him about the kiss, or at least it was as good as any other chance I would have. I kissed him, and I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have. But I needed to know. I still don’t really know. 

But it was a messy thing to say, selfish as well, cause I wanted him to forget it right away and not mention it anymore. I wanted to let it out, so my mind would calm down, without having to suffer any of the consequences. 

I didn’t say anything. I let Harry lace his fingers with mine and guide me into the house until we were both in his room, and he walked to his closet to get something to sleep on. It was a shame, I had been promised that he would be naked. I quietly took my own hoodie off and stood there for a second feeling silly as I noticed I would actually have to sleep with the stupid teddy on. It was itchy, what was I thinking. 

I sat on the bed while I waited for Harry to come back, and stared at his phone as it kept buzzing off. His screen was lit up with messages, some from Jeff, some from Mitch and some from Camille. Her name popped up on the screen again and again and I felt my heart pound in my chest as the short moment of bliss slipped away from my fingers. It was so late, why would he be texting her? Had he texted her? Was that why he was naked?

Fuck.

Harry back to the room wearing only a black pair of boxer and he took his phone just as a FaceTime call came in. I pretended not to notice it was her as I lied down on the bed and he silenced it and joined me. His arms went around my waist and he pulled me close, so my  back was pressed to his warm chest and our legs were tangled between the sheets.

“Aren’t you gonna answer?” I tried to ask as casually as I could. “What if it’s important?”

“It’s not,” he mumbled, and his words rose little goosebumps down my arm as they fanned over the nape of my neck. 

“I could go to another room or you could…”

“You’re in my bed, why would I go anywhere, Sof? S’not important, I swear.”

He may be right and I may be his, but he was definitely not mine. 

He was never going to be. 

***

I had no idea what time it was, but it was probably late. It was difficult to tell cause Harry had blackouts to cover the big windows. 

I could feel the weight of Harry’s body against mine as I blindly looked for my phone, which had been buzzing somewhere on the bed for a while now. 

“Fuck,” I muttered under my breath as I squinted at the bright screen and saw Sam’s name on it. 

“Turn it off, baby,” 

“It’s Sam. He probably needs his car back.” Or was wondering why would I take it in the first place. 

“I’ll buy him a new one, just turn it off.” Harry was still more asleep than awake and he turned his face away from the light coming from the phone. I stared at the screen, biting my lip as I felt like the tears started to prick on my eyes. 

What was I supposed to tel Sam anyway? Hey, I’m sorry I kissed you and then stole your car so I could sleep in someone else’s bed? Remember I told you it was complicated? It’s really not, he loves another girl, I’m just keeping her place warm for her. I know it’s pathetic, Sammy, but I’ll take what I can get. Don’t hate me, please. I need someone that would take me back when this is over. I’ll buy us an apartment in Paris, make it worth losing my soul. I’m sorry, I definitely fucked up. 

I silenced the phone and closed my eyes as I laid back down on the bed, staring into the darkness as Harry rolled to his side again so he could hug me. I shifted, until our chest were pressed together and I nudged the tip of my nose against his jawline, pressing sweet kisses on his neck as he sleepily brushed his fingers over my waist. 

“You’re really wearing lingerie?” Harry whispered almost giddily and I wish I could see the smile on his face. “I thought it was just my dream.”

“Were you dreaming about me?”

“Yeah, I was eating your pussy and you kept screaming my name.” Even if I couldn’t see him, I could hear his smirk and a little bubble of fire lit up right by my lower tummy, pressing between my legs. I had been there, it was definitely not a dream.

“You like it when I do that?” 

“Mmmm...I can’t really remember. Maybe you should sit on my face…Freshen up my memory.”

[pomeqraniqht]

ULTIMATE SHIP MEME! @rustyparker

Send in two (or more) names and I’ll fill all this out about the ship!

General:

Rate the Ship -   Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last? - Forever (hopefully) or until one of them dies. 

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - Honestly the jury is still out on this, I like to think they both fell in love at the same time, I feel like a better way to look at it is who acknowledged their love first and it was Sofia, and it was about like 5-6 months in? Sofia was honestly not expecting it and for once was just kinda into it for the sex but it turned into so much more than just hooks ups in bathrooms it was fucking all night, taking baths together, and making pancakes. 

How was their first kiss? - Hot. It had build up, potential, and it screamed so much more. It left them both breathless and needy enough to a point they both went off and fucked in a clubs bathroom. It led to a lot more kisses and a lot more lewd things that night, Rusty was a drug addict and Sofia enjoyed alcohol, but that night they both discovered a drug they immediately were addicted to: each other. 

Wedding:

Who proposed? - Rusty did. 

Who is the best man/men? - Roman. 

Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - Isabelle. 

Who did the most planning? - Rusty along with a wedding planner, it was a small wedding so not too awful much to plan. 

Who stressed the most? - Neither? Sofia maybe about the fucking lingerie and walking in the woods in high-heels. 

How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - Their parents, specifically; Sofia’s mother. 

Sex:

Who is on top? - Both. It’s sometimes more Rusty than Sofia because he’s so addicted to watching her unfold beneath him, but they both enjoy being on top. 

Who is the one to instigate things? - Both. I can’t honestly say it’s more one than the other because they both can not leave the other alone, they’re constantly having sex. Especially before when they were dating and had no responsibilities, they had sex everywhere, all the time, day or night. I’d like to believe if class was in session while she was teaching he’d show up and bend her over her desk and fuck her at work too, no place is safe with these two. 

How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now (literally)

How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head | They’re not insanely kinky but they’re kinky enough in their own ways, obviously no horse heads or latex suits but there is definitely some strong kinks here. 

How long do they normally last? - From a few minutes to hours to all night to days. There isn’t a specific time for them it ranges and they both have such a high sex drive I’m sure they could fuck for a week and still want more. 

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? - I’d like to believe so however I feel Rusty definitely loves making Sofia cum endlessly, especially when she’s pregnant and she can squirt everywhere and make a god awful mess. He loves it. He may not be doing drugs now but he’s still addicted to making Sofia his drug choice. 

How rough are they in bed? - Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it. - They’re rough. Lamps have been broken, headboards, plates, a TV, paintings, a sun lounger... when they’re rough they’re rough. 

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory. There is so much love in the after-care and cuddling that follows after they have sex it’s mind boggling that two people can go from wild animals to soft bunnies. 

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - 4, they both grew up alone and Sofia never wants their kids to feel that way. Plus even if they don’t /plan/ on having those children it’ll just happen. They’re very fertile for a couple of fucked up kids. 

How many children will they adopt? - I’m not sure, probably none if I’m honest, but who knows? Rusty was in the system so perhaps they may end up adopting for that very reason. 

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - I feel like they both do? Maybe Sofia more-so if Rusty’s at work but he helps out a lot. 

Who is the stricter parent? - Rusty HAS to be. Sofia tries but no one ever takes her seriously and even though Rusty’s the fun dad, she has to rely on him to be stern. 

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - Sofia does because Rusty’s the god damn one encouraging it. 

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - Both. They both do this, granted Sofia likes to prepare them the night before but both parents are involved. 

Who is the more loved parent? - Sofia will say Rusty and Rusty will say Sofia. It’s a tie. They’re both loved equally. 

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? Both of them, they won’t miss any of that. They love their kids and want to be as involved in their lives as possible. 

Who cried the most at graduation? - Sofia did, but Rusty shared a few proud tears as well. 

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - Both of them but Rusty would do it in a way so Sofia wouldn’t find out about it because he wants to be the cool parent. 

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - Sofia does. 

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - Sofia is, it’s a whole thing to do with her insecurities. She’s gotten a lot better but it’s still hard. 

Who does the grocery shopping? - They both have to go because of their lifestyle, Rusty is essentially keeping her safe from the papaz when they shop. 

How often do they bake desserts? - All the time. Sofia’s got a major sweet tooth especially when she’s pregnant, literally, the house turns into a bakery. 

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - Meat. Sofia forces herself to eat salad but they are carnivores always. 

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - Rusty would surprise Sofia because she always cooks and when he does it’s just like the most precious this ever. 

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - Rusty, but before they had kids. Now they mostly just eat at home. 

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - Both of them because they can’t leave one another alone so while they’re fucking on the counter the god damn place is going up in flames. 

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - Both. 

Who is really against chores? - Neither? 

Who cleans up after the pets? - Rusty. 

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - Sofia... no one ever looks anyways, right? 

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - Sofia. All part of her issues, everythings gotta be perfect. 

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - Roman...kept it too. 

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - Sofia but she also makes Rusty take long baths too, it’s good for the skin! 

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - They go as a family. 

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - Every. Single. Holiday. 

What are their goals for the relationship? - To last forever even when they hate each other. 

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - Rusty. 

Who plays the most pranks? - The both of them do because they’re big kids with water guns in California. 

[determinedfate]

once more with feeling

Summary: Sans tries to save his brother, over and over and over again.

It never quite takes.

Warnings: Major Character Death, Genocide Route Spoilers, Angst

Characters: Sans, Papyrus

ao3

ffn

Word Count: 5603

A/N: Because there has to be some reason why Sans never even tries to stop you from killing his brother.

Special thanks to my beta Zerathine, without whom this story wouldn’t be half of what it is today. Seriously, thank you so so much, from the bottom of my heart.

"Sans? Can you... read me... a story?"

"...sure, bro. whatever you want."

there once was a f-fluffy bunny who lived in... a little house,

and one day his-his friends c-came to... to play with him.

they laughed... a-and they played un-until the sun went d-down

and then... and then th-they... all w-went...

"...pap?"

The first time Papyrus dies, after Sans stops screaming, he goes to Undyne. She’s Papyrus's friend; she deserves to know what happened. Deserves to know what Sans has failed to do.

He goes to her with Papyrus's scarf, remnants of dust still clinging to the fabric. He watches out of the corner of his eye, too intent on the blank cavern wall opposite to fully look at her, as she takes it, looks at it for a long moment, and then looks back at him.

He is expecting her to attack him, to dust him, to blame him for not being there to save his brother.

Instead, she pulls him into a firm hug, gentle as she ever gets, and whispers, "I'm so sorry Sans. But it wasn't your fault."

(He hates her a little bit for that.)

Everything is going fine, the human has been so kind to them all, talking and laughing and completing Papyrus's puzzles. They haven’t killed a single monster.

And then they fight Papyrus.

Sans watches from nearby (he doesn't quite trust the human, not yet, not after that last reset) as they grin and dodge bone attacks like they're nothing, feeling himself relax just a little. The two of them are obviously having fun. There's nothing to worry about.

The human’s walking stick has been sharpened to keep them from slipping on the ice, but it’s dulled from almost constant use. They slide, feet falling out from under them. Papyrus goes to catch them, to help them up–

They flail their arms, stick lashing out in an arc of danger–

The third time Papyrus dies is an accident.

The stick buries into Papyrus’s chest, going straight through the battle body like wet paper. The human's hands fly to their mouth in horror, but it's already too late. The damage is done.

Sans doesn't even reach his brother this time before Papyrus turns to dust.

Sans stops talking to everyone. Just… wraps the scarf around his neck and disappears, leaving an empty house and an unpaid tab behind.

It’s the ninth time Papyrus has died.

It's just. He's sick of the knowing looks he gets. Of the sadness in people's eyes – not because Papyrus is dead, oh no. Because most of them didn't care about Papyrus when he was alive, why should they now that he's dead? No, they're just sad for Sans. Because he no longer has a brother to take care of him.

But the worst of it is the pity he gets.

The pity comes from everywhere: the Shopkeeper, the dogs, his acquaintances at the bar.

Even Grillby and Undyne, who both know him better than almost anyone alive, look at him with pity.

So Sans leaves, scarf wrapped around his neck and jacket zipped to his chin, and once again waits for the human in the Judgement Hall.

He takes Papyrus’s Gyftmas present with him.

(It’s an action figure.)

"HEY SANS... WHAT'S THAT GIANT BALL?"

Sans grins at his brother as they both watch the gorgeous ball of fire in the sky.

"we call that 'the sun', my friend," he says, resting a hand on Papyrus's shoulder. Papyrus gasps and clasps his hands together in amazement.

"THAT'S THE SUN? WOWIE!"

The entire group chuckles, but Sans isn't paying attention. He's too busy gazing at his brother's astounded face.

Maybe this was worth everything, after all. This group of friends, the surface, the way the kid's grinning at them all. If only they can stay like this for a while.

Papyrus shouts something about being the newest mascot and runs off. Sans shrugs; his bro would be perfect for the job, after all. He turns to follow, to take a shortcut–

The world shifts.

The second time Papyrus dies, Sans is there. He looks on in horror as the knife juts out of his little brother's chest.

He tried, he tried tried tried to get there in time, sending out attacks the second the human so much as flinched, but the human wised up this time. They dodged, and then they were right there and…

All this magic at his disposal, and Sans could only watch in horror as the knife flew through the air, sharp metal glinting in the dim light as it buried itself into Papyrus's sternum.

"PAPYRUS!"

Sans screams it as he rushes over to his brother's side, catching him with his magic as he crumples to the ground. "no no no n o n o! papyrus, can you hear me?"

But it's no use. Papyrus stares at his brother in shock, opening his mouth to say something – probably a reassurance, Sans thinks, a little hysterically – before he crumbles to dust in Sans's arms.

"No!"

The scarf flutters down to rest on the snow in front of him, landing with the softest whisper of sound, and Sans picks it up with trembling fingers.

oh pap.

Not again not again not again...

i'm so sorry.

Sans looks up then, eye blazing with blue and yellow fire, glaring at the human in front of him. The brat is staring at him, expressionless, eyes blank and hands covered in his brother's dust.

Sans narrows his eyes.

This time it takes the human twice as many tries to finally kill him.

The first time Papyrus dies is the first time Sans breaks his promise to the lady behind the door.

He is actually shaking with rage and staring the human down with death in his eyes, because how dare they! How dare the human kill his brother, the light of his life? He saw the tracks leading from the clearing; he knows it was them.

Which is why he followed them here, to this golden hall. Why he was waiting for them to come stumbling from the elevator.

He doesn’t even give them time to react; just launches the most powerful series of attacks he can muster, bones rising and falling in waves and blasters hitting dead on target. He kills them instantly.

But then they come back. They just keep coming back and back, no matter how many times he kills them, until...

The first time Papyrus dies is the first time Sans dies.

Sans wakes up, and he's in his room in Snowdin.

Sans lies in bed at first, blinking up at the dingy ceiling. It's not the first time he's woken up after a reset, but it is the first time he's woken up after dying.

The first time he's woken up since Papyrus...

Sans shoots up in bed, soul racing. As if on cue, he hears a knock on the door.

"SANS! IT'S TIME TO GET UP, YOU LAZYBONES! WE'RE GOING TO BE LATE FOR SENTRY DUTY! TODAY IS THE DAY, I CAN FEEL IT! THE DAY THE GREAT PAPYRUS CAPTURES A HUMAN AND BECOMES A ROYAL GUARD!"

Sans has never felt so happy to hear his brother in his life, which is saying a lot. He stumbles out of bed quicker than he has in a long time, sheets tangling around his leg and trailing behind him, and throws open the door.

And there's Papyrus, standing, whole and healthy and alive right in front of him.

Sans chokes on a sob as he rushes over to his brother.

"-AND THEY WILL ALL LOVE TO EAT MY SPAGHETTI!" Papyrus is saying, but he cuts off and stumbles backwards as Sans slams into him in a hug.

"...SANS?" Papyrus asks as Sans buries his face in his brother's chest, arms reaching as far around his ribs as he can stretch them. He chokes off another sob. He can feel Papyrus's arms come up to wrap around him in a comforting gesture.

"...It's alright, brother," Papyrus says, his usual exuberance quietened as he draws his brother into a deeper hug. "Whatever you dreamed about, it is alright."

not a dream, pap, Sans thinks miserably. He tightens his hold on the battle armor. Papyrus has kneeled down now, and is hugging his brother with all his might, as if he can squeeze all the bad feelings right out of him. Sans sighs and rests his head against Papyrus's skull.

Too bad it doesn't work that way.

They stay that way for what feels like a lifetime, hugging in the hallway, before Sans finally gives a sigh that shudders his entire soul.

"...i'm alright pap," he says finally, trying to comfort his brother who has begun shaking almost as much as Sans himself is. "just had a rough night, that's all."

Papyrus doesn't answer for a few minutes, and then pulls away from the hug. He looks into his brother's surprisingly tear-free face and forces a smile. "Well then, brother, don't worry about a thing! Today you should relax! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WILL NOT LET A NIGHTMARE OVERCOME THE GREATEST BROTHER EVER!"

Sans gives a weak but genuine smile. "not as great as you, bro," he says, and watches as Papyrus's eyes sparkle at the compliment.

Sans chuckles. "come on," he says, getting to his feet and reaching out a hand for Papyrus to take – and when had he dropped to his knees anyway? "you know what would cheer me up? some of your homemade spaghetti."

Papyrus's eyes light up, and Sans can't help but chuckle some more as his brother jumps to his feet, pumping a fist in the air in triumph. "YES! SPAGHETTI WILL SURELY CHEER YOU UP, BROTHER! COME, TO THE KITCHEN! I WILL MAKE THE BEST SPAGHETTI YOU HAVE EVER TASTED! NYEH HEH HEH HEH!""

Sans grins and follows at a more sedate pace. His brother always did know how to cheer him up.

With any luck, that horrible timeline will never come to pass again.

He's wrong.

The child – not a child that thing isn't human or monster it's a demon – shambles into town, dust coating its hands and clothes, eyes empty and face devoid of expression.

Sans doesn't understand. What happened to the child of the last reset, the human who held kindness and wonder in their heart? What happened to the human who befriended his brother, who Sans grew so fond of, who sobbed with horror when they had accidentally hurt a monster?

How have they become this?

Snowdin clears out quickly, monsters panicking and fleeing into the night. Sans shortcuts around the town in panic, asking everyone he comes across if they have seen Papyrus, but everyone who isn't too terrified to talk answers in the negative. Sans checks every place he can think of, going so far as to look in Grillby’s, but where is Papyrus?

"BROTHER!"

Sans whips around in relief at the welcome sight of his younger brother running up to him.

"Pap!"

"BROTHER, I MUST STOP THE HUMAN BEFORE THEY GO TOO FAR!"

The relief turns to outright terror.

"Pap, no!" he shouts, icy panic clawing its way up his throat. "You can't!"

"BROTHER I MUST! I AM A SENTRY, I HAVE TO PROTECT THE TOWN! BESIDES, THERE IS GOOD IN THEM, I KNOW IT!"

"pap, trust me on this! there isn't any good in them! if you do this you'll die!" He can't believe his ears. Memories come flooding back to him: a dusty scarf in the middle of a path, waiting in the hall to the king's throne room, killing and killing and killing and dying...

Sans can't go through this. Not again.

Papyrus's face softens at his brother's words. "I won't Sans," he says, voice as quiet as it ever gets. "I promise I won't. I'll be alright. I'll stop the human, I'll become their friend, and all will be well."

Papyrus has gotten that stubborn look in his eyes, and Sans knows that nothing he can say will be able to convince his brother otherwise. So he does the only thing he can do.

"i'm going with you."

Papyrus's expression changes to one of worry. "BROTHER, NO!" and he's shouting again, voice rising once more, and there is genuine fear in his tone and it wracks Sans with guilt to have put it there. "YOU CAN'T COME WITH ME! YOUR STATS..."

"I'm coming and that's final," Sans snaps, voice going harsh. Papyrus hesitates for a second, uncertainty on his face, but he too knows when it's useless to argue with his brother. He knows this is not a fight he can win.

Knows that Sans will go anyway, just as Sans knows Papyrus will confront the human regardless of what he says.

Papyrus gives a solemn nod. "Then come, brother," he says in a subdued voice. "We must stop the human."

The fifth sixth seventh time Papyrus dies, Sans isn't even there. He's not there not there not there not there because there has been no warning, the resets have been fine, Papyrus has gone off on his own to capture (befriend) the human and Sans lets him go because he is an idiot.

He tries to be there as soon as he realizes where Papyrus is but even he can't get there fast enough to stop it and once more all he finds is a scarf and a pile of dust.

He doesn't confront the human this time (or the next or the next) because he's so, so tired and he just wants this to stop, wants this to end.

And Sans is a piece of shit excuse for a brother because he can't save Papyrus, no matter how hard he tries and tries he can't save him.

And that hurts most of all.

Sans doesn't know how long he can keep this up. Doesn't know how long he can keep lasting without his brother.

Doesn't know how many times he can do this.

Sans tries to save his brother, over and over and over again.

It never works.

This time, Sans isn't going to take it, isn't going to just stand idly by and watch as his brother is cut down in front of him.

He doesn't even tell Papyrus what he's doing, just bids his brother goodbye as he strolls off once more – to that human his brother's murderer his brother's death – and follows Papyrus silently.

And when he gets to the clearing, there they are: Papyrus rambling on about capturing the human, the child standing there with that wretched knife in their grip.

Before either can make a move Sans is there, eye ablaze, bone attacks reaching out to strike the human down where they stand.

Blood pours from multiple puncture wounds.

Sans lets out a bitter chuckle which becomes a full-blown laugh, because he did it. He finally did it. He killed the human before they could kill Papyrus.

But how long will this last, Sans wonders, before they come back?

Maybe they won't come back. Maybe they'll just give up, see this whole thing as not being worth it and just leave.

Sans hopes that's the case.

"Sans..." comes the weak voice of his brother. "How could you?"

The laugh dies in Sans's throat. He spins around, and Papyrus is there, staring at Sans with one hand out as if to stop him, wide eyes brimming with betrayal and the slightest hint of something like unrecognition.

And Sans just. He did that, he put that look on Papyrus's face, he made his brother afraid of him.

"pap..." Sans begins. He's not sure how to fix this, how to make this better.

But before he can think of anything to say, Papyrus lets out a gasp and points behind him. Sans whips around...

...to come face-to-face with the human.

The first thing Sans notices is that they're actually furious this time. Normally they don't show any emotion when he kills them, but now?

Now, their eyes are all but glowing with rage.

And he doesn’t know what happened, what changed except…

Except that he killed them before they could kill Papyrus.

"papyrus," Sans orders, throwing an arm protectively in front of his brother. "get behind me. now."

Papyrus hesitates. "Sans?" he asks, and his voice is trembling.

"Now!"

Papyrus shakily complies, and then Sans and the human are at it once more, bone attacks flying and knife glinting in a perilous dance. They know each other's attacks well enough by now to cut out any and all surprises. Sans kills them, again and again and again, Papyrus letting out a whimper each time. It pains Sans to do this to his brother, to make him watch, but if that's what it takes...

But it's not enough. It's never enough. Sans throws up a full wall of bones to shield them both but the human slips through the tiniest crack in the barrier, dodges blasters and sharpened projectiles and swings their knife and…

Papyrus goes down.

And of course Sans has to catch him. Can't let Papyrus die without him, not when he failed again.

The human kills Sans while he's still cradling his brother's dust.

Can you feel them? he wants to shout to the human. Can you feel your sins crawling on your back? (he wants to shout to himself.) After what you did to them – did to Toriel, to Undyne, to Alphys, to Mettaton?

After what you did to Papyrus?

Sans awoke with a jolt as a scream rang throughout the house. He recognized Papyrus's voice instantly and scrambled out of bed, racing out the door and over to his brother's room.

"Papyrus!" he shouted as he slammed the door open. His brother was sitting up in bed, tears streaming down his face as sobs wracked his tiny frame.

"pap! pap, what is it? what's wrong?" Sans asked, hurrying over to his brother's side. The little skeleton burst into a heart-wrenching wail as he buried his face in his older brother's shirt.

"pap! hey, it's okay, you're okay," Sans soothed. He rested a hand on the back of his brother's head as his other arm pulled Papyrus into his lap, and began to stroke the skull in a calming gesture. Eventually Papyrus began to calm down, his sobs slowly dissolving into hiccups.

"hey," Sans said eventually, trying to push his brother away a bit so he could see his face. "do you wanna tell me what's wrong?"

Papyrus shook his head furiously and buried his face further into the crook of Sans's neck. Sans sighed.

"nightmare?" he asked gently, giving up on trying to see the kid's face and instead holding him more closely to his chest.

Papyrus hesitated, then gave a tiny nod, tears flowing anew. Sans sighed again; it broke his heart to see his brother like this. Pap had always been prone to nightmares, and it killed Sans every time. Gently he began to rock Papyrus back and forth, trying to lull him back to sleep.

“it’s okay pap.”

"it's okay pap," he repeats as he cradles his brother's broken body. Papyrus's face is nestled in the crook of his neck, where it belongs. Sans doesn't even care if the human kills him anymore. Let them.

“shh.”

“shh," he whispers as he rocks Papyrus back and forth, like he did when he was younger and had another nightmare. He can hear the human's footsteps falter and then slowly peter out as they walk off. Good. Run away, you dirty coward.

"S-Sans-"

“i’ve got you.”

“i’ve got you, you're going to be okay." The tears are flowing freely now, trailing down his face and landing on the back of Papyrus's head.

“you’re going to be okay.”

“i promise.”

"Help!" Sans shouts, screams, because his little brother's dying dying always dying and nothing he does can stop it.

"Somebody please help us!"

But nobody came.

The first time Papyrus dies is almost the worst. Because it’s such a nice day outside: Sans has spent the day slacking off, chatting up his acquaintances at Grillby’s, while Papyrus has been out calibrating his puzzles.

There is nothing to indicate something is wrong.

Only a dusty scarf in the middle of the path to Waterfall Cave.

Sans doesn't believe it at first. Can't believe, refuses to believe. He drops to his knees in the snow, hands hovering over the scarf and the pile of dust.

And that's when he sees it.

A set of footprints, child sized and coated in dust.

But no, this can’t happen, has never happened. There have been resets before, sure, and sometimes people died and sometimes they didn't but not Papyrus, not his brother and he doesn't understand what happened, what changed... Can't believe that Papyrus, his little brother, the only truly good thing in his life, is...

As he clutches the scarf to his chest, Sans hears someone screaming. He wants to tell them to just shut up already, but can't figure out how.

It takes a full minute for him to realize the screaming is coming from himself.

"why?" Sans can't help but ask. They’re both in the Judgement Hall. The human killed Papyrus but no one else and they still have their knife and he his magic and rage. He’s so so tired and just wants to know why.

"why do you keep doing this? if you have some sort of special power..."

And here he's pleading with them, desperate for answers because his brother keeps dying and dying and he just doesn't understand.

Sans opens his arms beseechingly. "isn't it your responsibility to do the right thing?"

The human freezes.

Ah. That got through to them.

The two of them stand there, staring at each other, for so long Sans thinks they're not going to answer.

And then they give a tiny nod.

Sans chuckles. "ah," he says. "i see."

He doesn't. Not really.

Sans allows his eyelights to go dark as he begs:

"Then why'd you kill my brother?"

"WOWIE! ARE YOU OFFERING A HUG OF ACCEPTANCE?"

"Pap, no!"

Not close enough not close enough never close enough...

"ST-STILL! I BELIEVE IN YOU! YOU CAN DO A LITTLE BIT BETTER!"

oh pap.

Sans watches as his brother's dust slip through his fingers. The human ignores him, shambling off to who knows where to kill everyone else.

no they can't.

“BROTHER!” Papyrus calls. “COME ON! THE SUN IS SETTING!”

Sans grins as he follows Papyrus's voice down the hall of their house. It's smaller than the one they had back in Snowdin, only one story, but it’s perfect. Papyrus still cooks his spaghetti, Sans still leaves his dirty socks in the living room; what more could they need?

"alright bro, i'm comin'. keep your head on, heh."

Papyrus merely groans at the horrible pun, but inwardly Sans is flinching, visions of Papyrus's head falling straight off his body crowding his mind...

"SANS?"

Sans looks up to see Papyrus standing there, head cocked to one side like an anxious puppy. Sans forces a grin.

"heh, i'm fine bro. just thinkin'."

Papyrus's hands go to his hips. "WELL DON'T THINK, BROTHER! WE HAVE A SUNSET TO WATCH!"

It's a tradition between the two of them: every evening they go outside to watch the sun set.

(And every night Sans lays awake, terrified that this is the night it'll all get ripped away and he'll go back to endless death and dust.)

Papyrus still looks concerned, and Sans can't have that, now can he? So he lays a hand on his brother's arm and allows his grin to soften into something almost genuine.

"i'm fine, bro, really. come on, let's go watch that sunset."

It's a cool evening, but that's nothing to skeletons who have lived most of their lives in a perpetually snowy town. They lay on the hood of Papyrus's car, eyelights dimming as they stare at the great orange ball slowly dipping down below the endless horizon. Sans chuckles at the sight.

Papyrus turns his head. "WHAT IS IT, BROTHER?"

Sans shrugs. "oh, nothin' pap. just can't believe we're finally here, is all."

Papyrus nods. "NEITHER CAN I,” he admits. "SOMETIMES I WAKE UP EXPECTING TO BE BACK UNDERGROUND, BUT THEN I OPEN MY EYES AND I'M STILL HERE. IT IS A WONDERFUL FEELING."

Sans feels his eyes begin to water. He shifts closer to his brother, feels Papyrus's warmth next to him. "yeah, bro. it sure is."

Why the fuck did you kill my brother?

The fourth time Papyrus dies is at the hands of an obviously terrified human. They're shaking, plastic knife held in front of them like a lifeline as an oblivious Papyrus goes on about capturing them and becoming a royal guard.

Their hands are coated in a fine layer of dusty gray powder.

Sans runs up from behind them, hoping and praying that he gets there before they do something they both will regret, shouting "Stop!" like a maniac.

That's his mistake.

The human, already on edge, starts at his voice and lunges forward, slashing Papyrus right across the chest.

"No!"

The human is shaking harder now, has dropped the knife and is backing up and whispering "no, no" under their breath. Sans doesn't pay them any attention, running right past them and dropping to his knees beside his brother's collapsed form.

"papyrus? papyrus, can you hear me?"

He can hear the pathetic crying of the human now, can hear them whimpering "I'm sorry, I'm sorry" over and over, but he has eyes and ears only for Papyrus.

"Sans..." Papyrus rasps out, before he wheezes out a horrible breath and collapses into Sans's arms, dusting moments later.

Sans feels numb. He was there, he was right there, he had him in his arms, and yet he still couldn't save the most important part of his life.

He can still hear the human's bawling.

"Sans... Sans, I'm so sorry."

He doesn't answer, only lets his eyelights go dark as he kills the human over and over again until they wise up and kill him first.

"You dirty brother killer."

Sans stops keeping count after the tenth time. It's just too much. He shouldn't have to do this, shouldn't have to keep count of how many times his little brother has died.

Thing is, Sans always figured he would be the one to die first. He's the lazy one, the depressed one, the one-hit wonder. He's the one who would kill and die for his brother.

But not Papyrus. Never Papyrus.

Because Papyrus is so goddamned good, and Sans is not, and there's no way he deserves to live while his brother dies and dies and dies.

Because Papyrus is a light in this dark underground, is a beacon of happiness in the gloom of their lives, and maybe the real reason he's always killed is because no one deserves him, not even Sans.

Especially not Sans.

The thing is, Papyrus doesn't even die every time. Sometimes, nobody dies. They all make it up to the surface and are happy for however long it lasts.

Those are the good times.

Sometimes the human stops their genocidal rampage when they see Papyrus's absolute belief in them.

But the more resets Sans goes through, the more and more his brother dies.

Killed accidentally when fighting.

Killed when offering acceptance.

Killed when his skull is crushed underneath a child's foot.

And the more Sans loses hope of ever being able to save him.

Sans starts wearing the scarf after the eighth time. He doesn’t bother to brush the dust off, just lets it cling to Papyrus’s favorite item, wrapped around the neck of his favorite brother (but how can Sans be, anymore?) as he once again goes to confront the human.

His brother didn't even do anything this time. Didn't try to stop the human, didn't try to capture them. Because Sans actually succeeded for once, convinced Papyrus not to go after the murderer. Convinced him to stay home instead, to have a day off and hang out with his big bro.

Managed to hide the human's very existence from him, claiming that everyone was just playing a great big game of hide-and-seek.

("OOH, HIDE-AND-SEEK? WHERE SHALL WE HIDE, BROTHER?"

"let's just hide here, bro. it's nice and 'homely', heh."

"UGH, SANS! ENOUGH WITH YOUR PUNS! THIS IS SERIOUS!"

"...i know, pap. i know.")

Sans really did hate to lie, but if that was what it took to keep Papyrus safe...

They find him anyway, out all alone and vulnerable in the middle of town.

It’s snowing.

Sans, idiot that he is, thought he and Papyrus were fine, thought they were safe, that the human was gone. So he allowed Papyrus to go shopping, going so far as to tell him he could just leave gold on the counter, that nobody would mind so long as he paid.

And when Sans finally realizes Papyrus has been gone for over an hour, when he realizes maybe they aren't as safe as he thought, he instantly shortcuts to the center of town, straight into the middle of a burgeoning blizzard, soul in his throat.

He immediately regrets it.

There is no human, not even their tracks – the snow took care of that. No, what awaits Sans is a sight he has seen far too many times before.

A scarf, a scattering of armor.

And dust.

You idiot, Sans thinks harshly as he pulls the scarf from its resting spot within his brother's dust. You absolute moron, Sans, how could you be so stupid.

With trembling fingers that belie his blank expression, Sans wraps the scarf around his own neck for the first time since this entire nightmare began, breathing in the last faint traces of Papyrus's scent, overshadowed as it is by that of his dust.

The kid can go straight to hell.

His eye is already burning.

The human arrives again and again and again, always wielding that damned knife, and no matter how hard Sans tries he can’t save his brother.

And Sans is sick of it.

Before the human can reach Papyrus, Sans is shortcutting in front of him, taking the blow.

"SANS!"

Nobody moves for a moment. Papyrus is too shocked, the human too emotionless, and Sans...

Well, he thinks he might be in shock.

And then the human, who has been staring at him disinterestedly this whole time, turns on its heels and walks away.

That's when the pain hits.

Ouch. A knife to the ribs will never not hurt, Sans thinks distantly, a hand going to his chest as he drops to his knees in the snow.

He can hear his brother rushing towards him, screaming his name.

But he would take dying a thousand times over if it meant Papyrus would live just this once.

Arms close around him as he begins to collapse, holding him upright. Papyrus's distraught face is right above him now, twisted in terror. Sans gives him a small smile, edges tight with pain.

"Sans? B-Brother?" Papyrus is outright whimpering as he shakes Sans ever so gently, immediately stopping at the pained gasp that emits from his throat. "Ca-Can you hear me?"

"hey bro."

Papyrus gasps out a sob of either relief or heartbreak, Sans honestly can't tell which. Tears have already pooled in his eyes and are now streaming down his face.

"Sans, you- you have to get up," he whispers, and his voice sounds so young, young and scared, and Sans feels a stab of guilt jolt through him.

Or maybe that's just the pain.

"Please," Papyrus is saying. "Now is no t-time to d-dawdle. Get up you l-la-lazybones."

Sans gives a weak chuckle, wincing as it turns into a cough which stabs through his chest.

"not a chance bro," he says sadly. He can already feel his fingers turning to dust.

Papyrus is babbling now, stumbling over his own words in his attempt to coax Sans to get up.

"hey," Sans says gently, weakly reaching a shaking hand to wipe away his brother's tears. Papyrus gives another sob, face scrunching up in distress, and Sans's heart wrenches to see his cheerful baby brother so upset. He gently strokes the skull with his thumb, like he always did to soothe his brother after a nightmare.

"since when have i ever passed up a chance to be lazy?" Sans asks, grinning. Papyrus chokes.

"it's going to be alright," Sans continues. Promises. "you won't even miss me. i'll be back before you notice i'm gone."

"No, no, don't do this," Papyrus begs, and for the first time Sans almost regrets his actions.

Almost.

Papyrus wails and crumples forward then, clutching his brother to his chest, free hand going up to cradle Sans's head as he rests his jaw on the top of Sans's skull. He begins to rock them both back and forth, back and forth, like a lullaby.

Sans grins and begins to recite the words he knows by heart. "there once was… a fluffy bunny…"

Papyrus is sobbing, but answers anyway. "Who l-lived in… a little… house."

Sans feels safe, here in his brother’s arms. He closes his eyes to the sound of Papyrus reciting their favorite book and allows himself to fall into darkness.

there once was a fluffy bunny who lived in a little house...

Sans falls to his knees in the snow...

and one day his friends came to play with him....

Sans clutches the scarf clutches his brother clutches the scarf...

they laughed and they played until the sun went down...

and then they all went...

“home.”

[restlessmaknae]

Smile for me #4

A photographer and a girl who hates being photographed.

Pairing: wedding photographer!Jungkook x Nam Jia (OC)

Genre: fluff, comedy, romcom, slice of life

Chapters: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4 / 5 / 6 / 7

Word count: 11.7k in total

Warning: slightly tipsy Taehyung 😂

After the wedding ceremony, everyone was invited to the restaurant where the wedding reception would take place. It was a cosy restaurant and my aunt knew the owners, so everything was already settled days after the proposal.

There were rose petals, vanilla-scented candles, pink and white bouquets and heart-shaped things everywhere. I had no idea whose idea was the design but I found it quite stunning. Especially Mr. Hot Pink looked good in the room but now I understood why we were asked to show up in either a black and white or a rosy-coloured outfit.

The party soon began and events followed events. You know, what it’s like; the couple was asked to write a poem to each other; say some nice words to their parents; play the do-you-know-each-other game; the groom, the best man and the father of the bride presented their speeches and when all of this came to an end, it was time for the music.

Instead of a wedding band, we had one of Namjoon’s friends – Park Jimin – on the stage who had a voice of an angel and sang lovely songs. Even though I particularly enjoyed the whole thing, I got tired and annoyed by the loud music, the even louder conversation between the guests, the already drunk people and the lack of oxygen. The air was suffocating, but I wasn’t in the least surprised since I was in a room with 200 other people. I seriously needed some oxygen. Like right then.

After I’d told my parents that I would go out a bit and let off some steam, I headed to the garden behind the hall. It was calmer and quieter and I liked how only a light wind blew through and I saw as it was blowing the restaurants’ curtains in and out. I stepped up to a fence and closed my eyes. I enjoyed how the sun was shining and closed my eyes. I exhaled, inhaled, exhaled, inhaled…

Then, I suddenly heard the sound of shutter. Oh no! I exactly knew what was happening and I have to admit that I wasn’t happy. Not at all. I frantically opened my eyes and turned around. There he was; Mr. Innocent behind his camera, capturing me as I was standing by the fence, trying to recharge my batteries.

“What did I tell you about being photographed?” I exclaimed, my hands balled into fists. I didn’t want to fight, of course, I had no idea how to do so, but I always acted like this when I got really pissed off.

“I’m sorry.” He mumbled right away and removed the camera from his face, solemnly clutching it to his chest. “It was just… the angle was perfect and the way the sunset reflected your silhouette, it looked so−“ he explained, looking so damn nervous but I cut him off.

I wasn’t in the mood to listen to his excuse. It was what it was and although I got used to him during the ceremony, it was still my healing time and not the reception party, so he shouldn’t have taken pictures of me.

“Delete it!”

“O-okay, sure.” He nodded while biting his lips and his hands were so shaky that he couldn’t even press the buttons.

I took the camera without his permission and looked down at the photo which he had taken of me. Surprisingly, it wasn’t even that bad. I mean, you couldn’t even see my face, nor realise that it was me. You could only see my silhouette in the dim light of the sun and the surrounding decorative elements. Despite having a lack of knowledge at the field of photography, I knew without a doubt that it was quite artistic.

“Oh, it’s not that bad. You can’t even see that the girl is me.” I commented and let my eyes wander at the picture. I felt as my tenseness drained from my body. Gosh, I suddenly felt so delighted by the thought that I could give him inspiration for a moment like this. I didn’t even know what hit me, my feelings from before totally disappeared.

“I promise I’ll delete it!”

“No, no, you can keep it if you want.” I shook my head and suddenly felt a serious need to disagree because who knew that he could take such wonderful pictures? I personally didn’t know what happened to me and Mr. Innocent also furrowed his eyebrows in question. Then, he blinked a few and looked at me with his mouth agape.

“Really?”

“Well, it’s quite good. I mean, you could capture the sunset well.” I shrugged like it was nothing but I swore I saw his shoulders slumping in relief. I didn’t want to make him more embarrassed, so I knew that it would be a sensible idea to give back his camera but the thought that the rest of his work was in my hands and I could easily look at them… well, it actually piqued my curiosity.

So, I ended up going through his pictures and I couldn’t even phrase how surprised I was. His creations weren’t good, they were great. There weren’t pictures only about people but also about the interior of the church, the flowers in the bouquets, a lonely heart-shaped muffin on a plate and a desk full of rose petals and candles but without anyone around it. I couldn’t easily be amazed by artistic attempts but I soon realised that I was making approving sounds as I was looking at them.

Jonghyun was silent during the whole time and when I finally looked at him, he was more than flustered. A shade of light pink tinted his cheeks and his ears also turned red. He was so cute. How can you not say that a guy is cute when he looks so innocent, his hair is so fluffy and his eyes are the most beautiful onyx-black that you had ever seen?

“So, I guess you don’t always take wedding pictures.” I said and tried to clear the tension in the air. I couldn’t forget about the fact that his hands were still shaky, so I assumed that it would be the best if he could loosen up a bit. For this reason, I gave back his camera and as soon as he grabbed it, a huff of air left his nose. He nodded.

“No, I rather take pictures of landscapes.”

“Do you do this for a living or you just help them out?” I inquired and tilted my head forward. I was curious but he didn’t seem to mind it. He was more confident, now that his camera was in his hands but he still cutely scratched the back of his neck as a small, sheepish smile was forming on his lips.

“I’d love to but I’m still at university. I’ve just finished my fourth semester and I’m doing it as a part-time job.” He said and wrinkled his nose.

His answer got me thinking. So, he had just finished his fourth semester? Well, that means that he was at my age if he didn’t fall behind. It was hard to believe. I mean, Mr. Innocent looked so much younger when I first saw him but now that he gazed at me with such a sincere look, well, maybe I could accept the fact that he wasn’t a little kid.

I knew that it was time for me to avert my eyes back to the sunset because I felt my cheeks heating up a bit. I was sure that he wasn’t aware of the fact that he looked undeniably attractive but his presence did weird things to the state of my heart. Like, really weird ones.

“I think you’re quite talented. I mean, I have nothing to do with photography but for me, these ones look quite aesthetic.”

“Thanks.”

He responded with one of his trademark bunny smiles and we soon fell into an awkward silence. Mr. Innocent was probably too shy to add anything and I didn’t know what else to say. As we were standing there, not even saying a single word, guilt shot through my veins out of nowhere. Even though I initially had no intention of apologising, after getting to know him a bit, I thought that he deserved it. If it was for Mr. Grey Hair, I would definitely not apologise because he was just as adamant as me. But because it was for Jonghyun, it was fine.

“Sorry for being so rude to you.” I confessed nervously and gave an awkward cough as I wasn’t good at things like that. I don’t remember the last time I said sorry. I was such a terrible person, you know. It wasn’t likely from me to admit that I was wrong. “I just hate being on photos but it has nothing to do with you, really.”

“That’s okay.” He nodded. There was no sign of rage or even grudge in his onyx-black eyes, so I was relieved. “I can understand. I’d rather take photos than being photographed.”

“Seriously? I didn’t think that a photographer would feel the same way as I do.”

“Seokjin hyung and Yoongi hyung are keen on taking selcas but I’m not really.” He shook his head but the gummy smile which was creeping onto his face indicated that he respected the elder guys despite their opposite mind-sets. Now, I knew why he wasn’t so mad at me and started yelling when I asked him to stop taking photos of me. He was just like me.

“The other two guys?” I pondered for a thought because I only learnt that there was Mr. Jeon, Mr. Min and Mr. Kim but I had no idea who was who.

“Yes. Jin is the cameraman and Yoongi is the other photographer.”

“And you’re Jonghyun, right?” I gave him a proud grin because I was glad that at least, I remembered his name.

I couldn’t have been more dumbfounded when he corrected me.

“Jeon Jungkook.”

“Oh, sorry. I’m Nam Jia.” I snickered half-heartedly. I was more than embarrassed; I was totally, undeniably, ineffably and irrevocably an idiot. I just wanted to dig myself a hole and disappear from planet Earth.

I was in the midst of mentally cursing myself when I heard a weird sound from Jungkook’s direction. I turned my face to see what it was when I heard it again and realized that it was his stomach. He was hungry and his stomach was growling.

“You haven’t eaten, right?” I glared at him but already knew the answer. The guests had eaten while the photography crew was working diligently. He must have skipped his meal even after our dinner.  “I’ll get you something.”

“No, no, no, you don’t really have to.” He protested fervently but it was more like his shyness than his actual condition that made him say that. His stomach growled again.

“Oh, come on!” I flung my arms in the air and probably sounded like an overprotective girlfriend. “Don’t starve yourself! I’m sure the others will be alright without you for 5 minutes or so!” I scowled and not even waiting for his answer, I turned around and headed back to the hall where I immediately heard a familiar voice.

“I thought that you’re not hungry…” Taehyung showed up as I was gathering some food for Jungkook. I wasn’t surprised that he scooted closer to my side when he spotted me among the guests. He was always clingy and a bit nosy.

“It’s not for me, it’s for Jungkook.”

“Jungkook?” His eyes widened in surprise and that cunning look came into his eyes as he continued. “Your cute photographer?” He cooed and started wiggling his eyebrows. I merely rolled my eyes. He was always like this when it came to my love-life – which by the way wasn’t even a definition. He tried to set up some dates for me with his buddies but none of them turned out to be fine. He was the worst date planner ever.

“He’s not my photographer but yes, it’s for him.” I shrugged absent-mindedly while I packed the plate with some grilled vegetables. I had totally no idea what Jungkook liked and he didn’t follow me, so it was all up to me. I got lots of meat, rice, vegetables and a suspicious-looking dipping which I assumed was white sauce.

“So, you two are already over your first kiss?” Taehyung hollered and couldn’t even be bothered to stop wiggling his eyebrows. I indignantly turned to him and gave him a deadly look. Oh, how I wished that I could wipe off that greedy smirk on his face!

“What? No, Taetae! Don’t be stupid!”

“But you two have a thing, right?”

“Your imagination is off the rail!” I bellowed in annoyance and nudged his shoulder – not so gently − when I walked past him. He didn’t get offended, not even a bit, but I heard his voice one last time before I left the hall.

“Good luck with your cute photographer!”

[couldnt-think-of-a-funny-name]

release the accidentally selling your souls to a demon story

So my birthday is only two days before Halloween. 

The day after I turned 13, I had my birthday party, which just consisted of my two friends sleeping over. It was a pretty average night, we just ate pizza, made some weird videos and watched movies. Everything was fine. 

Morning time comes- and we’re all pretty Buzzed. It’s Halloween, I was officially a teenager, we had some cool costumes planned, we were all very hyper and giggly that morning. We didn’t want our party to end yet so with some calls home, the girls were set to hang out at my place for pretty much the rest of the day- but we then realized we didn’t have anything to do. My mom had to go to Target for some reason or another, and told us if we went with her, she’d buy ‘any movie you want’ for us to watch. So we went. 

Now, firstly- anyone who’s ever been inside a Target knows it’s Not A Real Place. Secondly, the veil is always thinner on Halloween (facts) so this Target had suddenly become…Super Weird. Like, brighter and hazier than normal, and it’s like 9 in the morning and we’re roaming the empty and seemingly abandoned aisles in our pajamas. It just felt like one wrong step and you’d find yourself in another dimension, really intensely. 

We get to the movie aisle and start looking around. Now, at the time, I was the only one of my friends who actually liked horror movies- Raychel loves them now but she was the BIGGEST WIMP when we were kids, and Angie was just Very Quiet And Easy To Startle- but, like, Halloween. Teenager. The girls were surprisingly down for getting a horror movie, which in itself might have been a Warning Sign, but hey, I was stoked about it. We were going through some classic titles but nothing was really jumping out at us- until we see a dvd case, not even on the shelves, it was lying on the floor half shoved under a discarded shirt. The cover was pure white with a clown face laughing out at us. The title card read “Stephen King’s IT”. 

None of us had seen it before- but we had heard about it. It was one of those movies that the adults™ always got weird about, like Chuckie the Killer Doll or the Exorcist. Like it was something that actually scared them. So, like, we knew we totally had to get it. 

My mom tried to put up a small fight with “you’re only supposed to be getting into PG13 not R” (lmao as if this woman has ever given a flying fuck with restrictions I watched so much age inappropriate stuff starting at like age 4) but she quit pretty quickly. The entire ride home was met with “Okay I never watched the full version but it is a Very Scary Story so you’ve been warned!! Don’t start complaining when you’re scared!!!” stuff like that, you know. So we get home, pop some corn, get some hot chocolate, and jump in front of the tv and turn it on. 

So like…firstly, I think we all know by now that the original movie (or miniseries, whatever) isn’t actually That Scary. Secondly, I’m a fucking gem to watch movies with because I make a lot of jokes and laugh at the characters actions. And thirdly, it’s like thirty hours long. So we were all having the time of our damn lives here. Like, there were definitely parts that did scare us (Raychel had trouble with Bev’s bathroom scene. Angie hated the part at the sewers with Ben. Personally, I got freaked out by Eddie’s shower scene and sometimes I still find myself covering the drain with my feet just in case lol. And the blood balloons and the restaurant scene got to us too), but we were still all having a total blast. Watching this movie for the first time is still like a prime happy memory! But, you know, things come to an end. The movie was over, Raychel got picked up and Angie had to head home too (we were meeting up after dinner for trick or treating). I decided to walk Angie home since it wasn’t that far. 

The Veil Still Felt Thin. 

On the walk we kept talking about the movie, and made a point to not walk close to any sewer grates. Our small PA town bore enough of a resemblance to Derry for Angie’s comfort. But it was a nice day, you know? It was late afternoon, birds were chirping, sun was shinning, leaves were blowing everywhere, cars are honking hello at us, front doors were open and little kids could be heard excitedly yelling about their costumes. It was a day that struck me as very picturesque. We eventually got to the place where she could just shortcut through someone’s backyard, so we said ‘see you later’ and suddenly I found myself all alone. 

As quick as a snap, it’s suddenly dead silent. 

And I don’t mean “oh, someone closed their door and we can’t hear the kids any more” like seriously. It was unnaturally silent. No talk, no birds, no wind, no cars. The street was deserted. I couldn’t even hear myself breathing. I thought I had gone deaf at first! It was getting darker, only it was like an hour before that was supposed to happen and there weren’t any clouds near the sun. The air felt burning hot and freezing cold at the same time. I felt like a million eyes were watching me, except I was alone on a dark empty street, all the doors closed, all the curtains pulled shut. There wasn’t even so much as a squirrel or bunny running bye. I thought about calling out to Angie to see if she was still in the back yard, to see if she noticed anything, but the bushes weren’t rustling or moving at all. She wasn’t there. I was 100% alone. 

I start hearing a quiet, deep, throaty chuckling. 

I had been standing still in the same spot from where I watched my friend disappear through the bushes. At the sound, I slowly turned around. 

I was standing directly across from a fucking sewer.

It was too dark to see into it, and yes, I was 100% expecting that fucking clown face. But it was too dark. I couldn’t see anything. I still couldn’t hear myself breathing. All I could hear was this terrifying chuckle going on and on. I felt like if I moved something would pounce on me, like I was a rabbit playing statue. 

Now, I’ve mentioned on here before that I was That Asshole Kid who kept having weird paranormal experiences, and this was a lot more intense than I was used to. Like, shit, I’d had panic attacks over way less than this. I literally thought I was about to die.

And then…something in me kind of snapped. 

I don’t know what, exactly- if I was just tired of always being scared by this crap, or if it was some newfound teenage attitude, or just a primal urge of ‘hey I don’t wanna die’, or if the laughter just ignited something in me, but I just…snapped. 

I looked directly into the pitch dark in that sewer, and I said, loudly, over the still ongoing laughter, and more confident than I’ve ever felt in my life, “No. I am absolutely not doing this right now. You don’t actually need to screw with me, you’re doing this for what, fun? Attention? Find it somewhere else. I am not dying right after my thirteenth birthday.” The laughter got louder at that, more obnoxious. It just pissed me off even more. I made myself step off the sidewalk, and got to the middle of the street, still staring into the pitch black sewer and hoped I was making some intimidating eye contact. “What do I need to do for you to leave me the hell alone? You want my soul, or something? You want me to just pledge alliance to you or some bullshit? I will! All Hail This Creep, or whatever you go by! I’ll do what you want if you leave me alone!” 

And…the creepy laughter trailed off for a moment at that. Back to full, unnatural silence for a minute or so, before the disembodied voice let out an intrigued sounding, “Hmm.”

Next thing I know, the sky’s back a full, bright light that’s making me blink back stars from the sudden change, the wind’s blowing all over the place, and I jumped out of the middle of the street to narrowly avoid getting hit by a car that hadn’t been there a literal second ago. I still felt a little watched, but not as intensely as before. Everything seemed to be completely back to normal. I went back home (constantly glancing over my shoulder) and went on with the rest of the day. Went on with the rest of my life.

But, uh…sometimes this whole scene just comes back to me, and I can’t help but wonder about it. 

[honey-bunches-of-nope13]

Velvet, Blake, Kali and Neon are hanging out with their rather oblivious crush. Crush sees a spec or something the girls' fanaus feature and removes it. But they happen to touch it in the most pleasurable way possible, getting the girls all hot and bothered. Bonus: "Why is your face all red, do you have a fever?

Velvet

- Velvet and her crush were just wandering around on the beach before the day’s round of fights for the Vytal Tournament so she could get some more pictures stored up in her camera. While watching two students from Vacuo spar, things got a little out of hand and they both ended up getting blown away by a massive gust of wind. They were both unhurt, and they helped each other get up and get the sand off their clothes. They start walking again to find a less rowdy subject for Velvet to take pictures of when her crush tells her to stop. She stops and gives them a confused look. They reach up and try to remove a fleck of semi-dry seaweed that had gotten stuck on one of her bunny ears. Unfortunately, it was still wet enough to stick, so they had to work it a little bit to get it off. Velvet tried to hold it back, she really did, but she couldn’t help but moan in an almost orgasmic way. She immediately covered her mouth with her hands as her face burned bright red. No one was close enough to have heard her except the one person that she would have wanted to hear that the least! Her crush blinked at her a few times before speaking. “Why is your face all red? Do you have a fever?” Her crush put a hand on her forehead to check her temperature. “Your face seems kind of hot. Come on, let’s get you back to your room. Pictures can wait.” They grabbed her hand and started dragging her toward the school. (No! No! No! Not my room! This is bad!)

Let’s just say that more than her face got a little hot that day.

- Blake

  Blake and her friend/secret crush were taking a break from a less than successful day of trying to get Faunus to join them in their campaign to protect Haven Academy. They were sitting in the shade of a thatch umbrella and drinking some fruit smoothies to cool down after being in the sun all day long. They were talking about how hard it was to believe that NO ONE cared enough to help! Blake was more understanding, but her crush just couldn’t get it. People were going to die! Humans or not, they were people! How could everyone be so complacent about all this!? What happened to empathy!? That’s what she liked so much about them. They worried about others before themselves. Everything they did, they thought about how it would effect others. It’s something so rare nowadays. While she was sitting there, lost in her thoughts as her crush ranted and raved about how they seriously just don’t understand how nobody seems to care about all of this, her crushes flailing caught a tray of smoothies that one of the smoothie shack’s employees had been carrying and sent it flying! The fruity concoctions splattered everywhere, but Blake managed to avoid the mess by using her Semblance. She did, however, end up with a small amount on one of her cat ears. Her crush though covered with the stuff, was far more worried about that small splotch of it on her. They quickly grabbed a napkin and dipped a corner of it in the nearby fountain that had been put there for ambiance and started to clean off her ear. She bit her lip as they tried to rub the stuff off of her, but it felt too good! She let out a loud moan and caught their hand to make them stop. The Faunus at the other tables knew exactly what had happened and couldn’t help but giggle. Oh, how awkward teenage dates can be! Blake’s face turned beet red as she looked around at the giggling people. “Oh my!” Her crush exclaimed. “You’re bright red! Are you okay!? Are you sick!? *gasp* It mush be sunstroke! Come on! Let’s get you home!” Her crush scooped her up and ran her back to her house bridal style. 

Thankfully, her parents were also out gathering signatures and weren’t home yet ;)

- Kali (is single and the chieftain of the island in this. You can decide why she’s not with Ghira)

It was a quiet day at home. For once, there was no pressing matters to attend to, no one was scheduled to come speak to her, and she and her crush were having a lovely chat over tea. For some reason, her crush seemed distracted though. It’s like they were looking just above her rather than at her. “Is something wrong?” She asked, setting down her cup. “You’ve got a ladybug on your ear!” They giggled. She had been wondering what that was. She figured it was just the light breeze brushing against her fur. “Let me get the little guy.” Her crush said and reached up to capture the little creature. When they did so, they accidentally grabbed a few strands of fur and tugged on them as they pulled the beetle away. Kali hadn’t been expecting that, so she had no chance to try to stop the moan from coming out. Her crush released the ladybug and it flew onto her other ear. “Little rascal!” They laughed and reached up to get it again. This process repeated itself a few times, her crush laughing at how much the ladybug seems to like her and how they are supposed to be good luck, before they took the bug around the corner of the house so it couldn’t see her. When they came back, Kali was panting slightly and shifting uncomfortably. “Are you okay? You look flushed.” They said and put a hand on her forehead. “You’re warm. I think you might be getting sick. Let’s get you to bed; you need to rest.” they said and pulled her up by her hand.

They went to her room, but there was no rest to be had.

- Neon

She had taken her crush to a killer rave that night. Things have been so stressful since the incident at Beacon. The atmosphere had been tense and Ironwood had been going fucking insane with the pressure he had been putting them under to improve their skills. They both needed to unwind and this was the perfect way to do it! There was dancing, cool music, lights, and maybe a few illicit substances and booze. Neon didn’t usually partake in the later items, nut she was SUPER stressed. She wasn’t going to go crazy, just a little E. Her crush wasn’t comfortable doing it and said that they would much rather make sure she was okay anyway. She felt great! All that stress had melted away and her body felt electric! Her crush kept an eye on her while enjoying the rave too. They loved to see how much fun she was having. She hadn’t been herself for the past few weeks, but Neon was back now! At some point, they noticed that some of the liquid from a broken glow stick  had gotten on her tail. They didn’t know what was in that stuff, but it probably wasn’t anything good. They took a napkin from the refreshment table and poured some of their water bottle on it and walked over to her. She wasn’t listening though and they finally had no choice but to grab her tail to clean it off. The way that they grabbed it would have felt amazing on its own, but the chemicals coursing through her body made it feel ten times better! She moaned loudly over and over as they scrubbed the goop off of her tail. When they finished, she was all over them. She was kissing their neck and rubbing their chest. They’d be lying if they said that it didn’t get their blood pumping, but she was on a substance, mind-altering or not, and they didn’t want to take advantage of that. Eventually, her  crush decided it was time to take her back to their dorms so they wouldn’t be hating it too much tomorrow morning. Neon wouldn’t let them go, so they sent a text to their team to let them know where they were and got into bed with the cat Faunus and let her snuggle up to them. When Neon woke up that morning, the rest of her team had already headed out for the day, but her crush was still asleep with her. She remembered what they did for her and it made her heart flutter. She woke them up with a shower of kisses on their face. She decided to finally confess her feelings to them at that point and then pick up where they left off the night before.

[unkindnessofone]

Bunny Rabbit

Pure fluff. I want to write a story about an object or place or something with sentimental value to each character. This is the first one. Let me know what you think. It goes out to @themoonkilledmyride. I see you, girl! I appreciate you reading my stories.

The Hemmings house had rules when it came to significant others spending time in the bedrooms of their children.

1) It was not allowed if there was no parent home.

2)The door had to remain open.

3) It could only be while the sun was out.

4) No exceptions to any rules above.

While Penelope blatantly walked right through all the other fences her parents put up, she did obey the bedroom rules. It was only her friends that she up in her bedroom and, while Connor had always adored Penny with pink cartoon bubble hearts in his eyes, he was respectful and was never doing much besides sitting on her floor talking or singing while she sat against the closet door and listened. Miles and March on the other hand had both broken each rule at least once.

Michael and Grace Clifford had always been more laid back with their children. Emmeline proved so challenging to control and influence from the moment she came screaming into the world that they just tried their best to keep her alive. Iden was such an easy baby that they never felt the need to set up rules for him. Besides, Michael had already talked to Iden about sex at Grace’s request that he knew his kid was in the loop. He had seen a condom wrapper in his kitchen garbage under the sink only a few days after he moved into the condo. All Mike cared about was that his children were being safe and present when it came to their bodies. After all, they were not his bodies to control. He and Grace always agreed on that. If their kids wanted piercings, tattoos, twelve different colours in their hair, or to keep multiple partners – they would not object as long as Emmeline and Iden were old enough and of sound minds.

So Iden didn’t think twice about shutting his bedroom door behind him when Mariona came over around seven in the evening after her shift at her parent’s gallery ended. His dad was out with friends, but had left the freezer stocked with frozen pizza for when Iden found himself hungry that Friday. On the floor, he took his time going through Mariona’s first binder of photos she had taken since school started. They had begun to seriously plan their first show, deciding it would be easier and feel better to do it together with her photographs and his sketches. On his bed, Iden had left a small stack of his books for her to look at as well as a few loose leaf pictures sandwiched in between. She had initially sat on top of his perfectly made bed with her legs folded open like a lily pad, but Mariona’s attention soon went everywhere else in his immaculately kept bedroom. Iden designated time to keep his world clean. He found it much easier to battle his depression when his world was organized. If he had a serene place to unwind, he could generally avoid slipping into a dark loop.

“We need someone who isn’t biased to help.” From the floor, his eyes focused on studying her pictures, Iden mentioned with his hand resting under his chin and partially covering his mouth. He looked for the different things Mariona talked about, but he wasn’t a photographer. He didn’t have the critical eye that she had. Iden just knew if he liked a photo or not.  “I like all your stuff.” They were still only a two months into officially dating. He still thought everything she did was wonderful solely because she did it.

“Some of those pictures are awful. You can’t like them all.” Standing up and lifting herself slightly on her tip toes, Mariona told him while reaching for a picture on the shelf above his bed. It was of him and his grandparents on his Dad’s side, the only two he knew, when he was about eight. He was in his soccer uniform and showing off his recently lost tooth right in the front. It was an embarrassing photo, he assumed, but Iden didn’t worry about what people thought of him anymore. He was trying to take a page out of his sister’s book and Emmeline Clifford couldn’t care what anyone thought of her. As long as they were thinking of her, she was pleased. “I won’t be offended. You can be honest. I’m going to be honest with you.” She explained, putting the picture back somewhat where she left it.

Iden knew she would be truthful no matter what her opinion was. It was one of his favorite things about Mariona.  He never had to do any guess work with her. He always knew what she was thinking.

“Okay, well I really like this one.” He constantly went back to the photo of the crammed bus shack just a block South of her family’s gallery. She used the technique of motion blur that she loved so much with a lot of her street photography. This particular picture made the overcrowded bus shack and all it’s waiting passengers inside the focus, the street around it just a mess of grey shades. Iden couldn’t look at it without wondering what different people were feeling, what kind of days they had just had, where they were going, what and who they were going to. He reached forward from the binder in front of him, adjusting his posture for a second, to peel off a bright neon green sticky note from it’s pad and mark the picture. He glanced up at his girlfriend, her hair natural and sitting up top of her head somewhat centered. She looked comfortable in her navy and red checkered pants with their wide legs and a very cozy white sweater hiding her inside. He smiled as she kept snooping around his room, moving to his book case and observing the eclectic mix of Star Wars memorabilia, soccer trophies, and pill bottles.

Iden’s eyes narrowed in on the pills. She grazed her finger over his multi-purpose vitamins, but didn’t seem to pay them any steady attention. She breezed right on by his anti depressants. Iden didn’t feel any shame that he took medication to help stabilize his mood. He knew more people who took pills than those who didn’t, but he still hadn’t quite made peace with himself when it came to his suicide attempt just over a year before. He didn’t know how to talk to himself about it so he figured he wasn’t ready to share that with Mariona either. He knew she wouldn’t be judgemental, but he didn’t want her to be discouraged to stay with him by his baggage. He didn’t want her to think that she needed to be his nurse. He didn’t want to slip again so he made honest attempts to stay in the moment. He took every day minute by minute in order to ward off any oncoming demons. “Are you going to help?” Chuckling, Iden asked once he had pressed the sticky note to the picture. He turned the page to give another photo his attention, but he sat up straighter and stretched out his legs right beside her binder, watching as she took an interest in the stuffed animal on top of the book case. The cocoa and cream colored bunny rabbit was in reasonably good shape considering it had been deeply loved from the time Iden was three to about six. It was the one plushie that he was allowed to bring on tour and Iden showed the rabbit the entire world.

“Is this why you didn’t want me to stay over two Fridays ago?” He had yet to bring her over to his mom’s place. “You weren’t ready to share your bed with a different girl.” Mariona spun around, hugging the rabbit to the side of her face and teasing. It was nearly as soft as it had been when it first became Iden’s.

“Kylo is not a lady bunny.” Dry as yesterday’s toast left on the counter, Iden responded, staring up at her as if they were talking about their views on war and mortality.

“You named him Kylo? As in the Star Wars character?” Her parents were nerds, granted Lord of the Rings nerds and not the Star Wars kind, but Mariona was still familiar with the most famous space opera of all the time.

“I was, like, four maybe.” He had actually been three. “I didn’t choose him, I made him.” Iden pointed from the ground at the fluffy, but somewhat limp rabbit’s right foot where his logo was still sewn on loosely. “He’s a Build-a-Bear.” Kylo was sentimental to Iden. He hadn’t cuddled with it or anything in a long time, but he couldn’t bring himself to part with it. When his Dad told him to bring some stuff over that would make his bedroom at his place feel more like his own, Kylo Ren-Clifford was one of the first things to be thrown in the cardboard box. This was really where he belonged.

Certain tasks didn’t feel right being delegated to an assistant or crew member. There were things that as a parent Michael felt a responsibility to do himself. He also knew it meant a lot more to Grace if he went to the store himself and picked up children’s cough syrup for Emmeline instead of just making the medicine magically appear in their hotel room in Ohio. Since Grace was occupied lying in a hotel bed with their Princess of Hacking, rubbing her back and kissing her pink as grenadine cheeks, Michael took Iden to the store with him.

It had been a particularly boring day for the toddler. With his Dad doing a hospital visit, radio interview, cable show interview, and special acoustic performance for twenty lucky winners, Iden Clifford was stuck at the hotel with his Mom and very sick sister. Since Emmeline required all the attention, Iden was left mostly to his own devices. He scribbled with crayons on hotel paper, he ate lunch in front of a television show about rainbow porcupines that fixed townspeople’s problems, he had a good one hour nap. Iden had wanted to  race up and down the hallway with his little legs and on large yoga balls with his Dad, his dad’s tour managers, Connor, Penelope, Uncle Luke, and a few crew members that he had known forever like they had at the last hotel, but there was no such luck. The whole day had been as low key as possible which was why Michael felt like going to a drugstore would be downright exciting for the small boy.

Underneath his kids Gap baseball hat, Iden took in the busy mall that his Dad took him into, reaching up to hold Michael’s bigger hand that could engulf Iden’s little fingers if he wanted to. He led him into the CVS without looking directly at anyone around them. Michael didn’t want to engage. He didn’t want to acknowledge the two phone cameras he saw directed at him and Iden. They were on a mission and Michael found it was best to keep to himself when he had a simple task to do. Besides, he knew Grace didn’t like when he talked to fans with the kids with him. She thought it was inappropriate.

While Michael stood in front of the different boxes of shelved medication, a children’s syrup box in hand with tiny printing for him to struggle and squint at, Iden crouched down and poked at the different allergy boxes, knocking some down as he whispered to himself the different colors he saw on the packaging. Red, white, blue, blue, red, green.

“We got it.” Michael informed his son who wasn’t paying attention, shaking the box in his hand and letting the bottle inside shuffle like a maraca that no one would buy. “Let’s go.”

In response, Iden lifted up his arm to his Dad and offered a box of Clariton that he had picked out for absolutely no reason whatsoever.

“For me?” He suggested more than asking. Iden even took the box back and pushed it into his chest. It wasn’t always the case, but generally if and when Emmeline was gifted with something, so was he. If she was having a bath, he was right in there with her. If Mom gave her slices of cheese or a pudding cup for a bed time snack, he had one too. Iden couldn’t understand this being any different. It had been explained to him on the car ride over that they were picking up medicine for his sister, so he just assumed he would  get to pick one out for himself as well.

Sounding like a dramatic inhale, Michael huffed out humoured before shaking his head ‘no’ at Iden. Iden glanced down at the box that he was poking his stomach with and just stared at it. He was being told ‘no’ and now he just wasn’t sure what to do.

“You got to put that back, bud.” Michael was trying to stop doing things for his kids. He could have just reached down, snatched the allergy medicine, and put it back on the shelf, but that kind of behavior was why Emmeline threw a temper tantrum about putting her toys away or why she just anticipated everyone doing everything for her. Iden was still young enough that Mike felt he could teach him to finish his own tasks. “You don’t have allergies.” It was possible that they would find out one day that he did. Hell, the kid was pale enough from Michael’s genes that he could very well need SPF 2000, but for now, Iden didn’t have any seasonal problems that they were aware of.

Slowly, Iden bent down on his knees, butt out, and reached to put the box back even though he had squished it’s side slightly without meaning to. He had just been clutching it so tightly to his chest. Both his hands uncurled and reached for a different box, the Reactine one right beside it, but Michael shook his head as soon as his son checked with his head raised to his Dad.

“I don’t know.” Iden stood up straight and explained, dropping his open palms to his side. “Why not?” His sentence was chopped up, but Michael caught the jist of it. He started to walk by Iden, just a half step, and watched as he followed him to the self-check out. Iden was good at continuing on even if he didn’t understand something or was upset. He never freaked out when it was time to leave the park. He could be disappointed and still carry on. It was a trait that Michael didn’t find in many adults, but was pleased to see Iden had picked it up somewhere.

“You’re not sick, bud.” Michael explained after scanning the box and putting it in a paper bag next to the check out. He hoped that Iden wouldn’t catch what his sister was fighting. As soon as Emmeline woke up with her cough mimicking the sound of a 90 year old miner and her eyes like red cotton puffs, Grace moved Iden out of the bedroom and into the king sized bed she and Michael were occupying while they were in town for another day. The two could still find privacy in the living area on the couch, in a small closet, or in the jacuzzi tub. She and Michael were trying to make more time for one another this tour since they were finally finding their own balance again after becoming parents for a second time around. Luckily, for both of them, Iden was a terrific sleeper.

“Molly is sick.” Iden repeated what he had heard a few times in different voices above his head that afternoon.

“I know. That’s who your sister caught it from.” Or so Michael assumed. He had heard from Ashton as soon as he saw him that morning with purple rings around his eyes and a Venti dark roast from the lobby Starbucks that Molly was three days in and still coughing up mucus and crying of a burning throat. Since Simone was travelling with Connor for work, opening her first counter in Toronto, Skye was stuck babysitting Molly for the day while also trying to shield baby Daphne from all the new germs.

Once Michael had paid, he took the bag in one hand and gripped Iden’s with his other. He walked them the same way out as they had come in from the particularly windy evening. Michael was turning them right where he remembered to, just at the Swarvoski store, when he saw an illuminated bright blue and yellow sign. He remembered when Grace was pregnant with Emmeline, just a few months, he thought to himself that he would take his kid to the Build-a-Bear shop one day. It was just a fluffy idea that had come into his mind when he was feeling particularly euphoric about the whole situation. He had only just heard Emme’s heartbeat for the first time a day before and now everything seemed like a possibility. He remembered saying he would take his kid to the Spam Museum, the Hershey’s factory, and to every family movie that came out. Of course, none of those things had happened yet, but there was some mumbling between him and Calum that they could find time to go to the Hershey’s factory soon. It sort of coincided with Daphne’s birthday in October. Michael stopped them walking for a second, Iden’s attention on his own reflection in the Swarvoski store window. He just stared into the jewels and found himself staring back at him in a translucent manner. Michael managed to check his phone out of his over-sized jean jacket, his paper bag still in hand, and debated with himself if they had time. Yes, Emmeline was sick. However, Grace was trying to get her down for a few hours of sleep. They both knew that tonight would be a night with Emmeline waking up a few times due to the ferociousness of her cough, but Iden’s day had been completely scheduled around his big sister being sick. Mike decided that Grace had things handled back at the hotel for now. How long could building a bear possibly take anyway?

“Hey bud?” Michael wiggled Iden’s arm around, shaking their clutched hands, until Iden looked up at his Dad, his head all the way back on his little neck. “Want to build a bear?” It was a question that Iden had never had posed to him before, so he blinked twice at his Dad while trying to sort out an answer and then nodded enthusiastically and shouted ‘yes’! “Alright.” Michael started leading Iden in and the closer they came to the pop music playing and the wall of stuffed animals to pick from, the more excited Iden’s body became. His smile was at full beam when they entered the store, Michael walking them up to the plush toys they could pick from. Iden’s hand, out of joy, was squeezing tightly around his dad’s fingers. He didn’t loosen up or run away, he had to hold himself in place. He didn’t know how else to not flip out.

Completely amused as well as looking forward to crossing something off his parent dream list, Michael crouched down to be closer to Iden’s height and watched as his kid just stared at all the toys with intense anticipation glowing from his brown eyes.

“So you have to pick one and then someone in here will help us fill it up.” Michael knew there were more steps than that, but he wasn’t about to overwhelm his son more than he already was. Plus, Michael didn’t know the other steps. He had never built a bear before so to speak. “Which one do you like? There’s some Pokemon ones.” He pointed over toward one end of the wall, Iden following his dad’s hand for a second and then looking elsewhere on the shelf before them. “Or the karate bear is pretty cool.” Michael figured that would be the one he would pick, a fluffy basic brown bear in karategi with a green belt wrapped around it’s center. “Which one do you like?” Michael stood up again and walked them closer, encouraging Iden to start them out on their Build-a-Bear adventure. The kid was so used to following after his larger than life sister and playing happily in all her activities that he hadn’t had to make many decisions on his own. When Michael loosened his hand from Iden’s that was when the three year old walked over to the window, finding a brown and white bunny with very floppy ears. He pointed at it with his finger patting at the fluff that he thought was fur on it’s ear and waited for his Dad to join him.

It made sense since Easter was the next holiday coming up, but they didn’t celebrate it much beyond hiding eggs around backstage dressing rooms, tour buses, and hotel rooms. Michael didn’t think much about it and just looked around until he found an employee to come help them. The young girl with a name tag that read 'Kate’ greeted them as if they were more special than anyone else that had come in and Michael appreciated it. She spoke almost directly to Iden and found the Easter inspired rabbit for him before taking him over to the stuffing station where she helped Iden to sit down with her so they could fill up his friend. Michael took a second to ask the kid behind the counter if he could leave his drug store purchase behind the till. He wanted both hands to properly take photos or a video on his camera. He knew it was hard for his parents to be away from their two and only grandchildren, so he wanted to give his Mum and Dad proof that the kids weren’t borrowed following their dad around on tour. They were still having fun. Well, Iden was at the moment. The little boy was gently stepping on a black pedal while Kate tended to stuffing the rabbit. It had to have been about the thirtieth stuffed animal she done this to all month. It was wasy for her to ask Iden questions while still doing her job, inquiring if he was excited for Easter and liked chocolate. It wasn’t until the rabbit was fully stuffed that Iden had warmed up to the salesgirl. He was naturally more shy than his sister was. While he wasn’t nearly as quiet as his friend Daphne, he did fair more to her than other kids.

“You can pick out a sound for your friend if you want.” She explained. “Or a scent.” Her manager liked to encourage both, but enough parents had looked at her with death stares for her to feel uncomfortable doing so. Iden checked with Michael who had his phone out. Michael was feeling too happy to damper the mood with any 'no’s’. He liked that he could give his children whatever they wanted and Iden was a pretty good kid. Michael had to exercise discipline twice as much with Emmeline than he ever did with his son.

“You can pick one.” He told his boy, knowing that was what Grace would do, and then watched as Iden went over to the area that Kate pointed out for him. Michael followed closely behind, watching as Iden pulled on sound strings and moved on to the next. He liked the cotton candy scent, but he couldn’t stop himself from pulling on the string that played out the Imperial March from Star Wars two more times. Michael helped Iden to make the decision that he should go with the song he liked as the heartbeat for his rabbit. Once his Dad handed him the right heart, Iden carefully sandwiched between his small hands and ran it over to Kate.

“I want this one for Kylo’s heart.” He annouced right in front of her before lifting up his top hand and revealing the red circle for her to use.

“Good choice.” She nodded and took it from him with the same amount of concern she knew he wanted her to use. “Kylo, huh? Kylo Rabbit?” She checked while stitching up the stuffed animal’s back.

“Yes.” Iden agreed. “He’s my favourite in the movie.” With Emmeline, Michael showed her all kinds of anime as a kid. She was always partial to Sailor  Moon and Kiki’s Delivery Service, but Iden had taken to the Star Wars movies. Grace thought he was too young,  but Michael had never mentioned to her that he used to stay up on the tour bus with Iden when he was a baby, giving him his bottle, and going through The Force Awakens and The Last Jedi. He couldn’t start telling Iden now that they couldn’t watch them. They were a part of his soul.

“He’s the bad guy.” The girl engaged as she finished with the bunny and handed him to Iden.

“He’s the cool guy.” Iden explained as if his fact was the more important of the two. Besides, his Dad always told him that nobody was all good and nobody was all bad. His mom felt differently, but he didn’t know that yet. Iden hugged Kylo to his stomach, both arms wrapped around him. He kissed each of his ears and listened happily as he set off the song that they had put inside of the stuffed animal.

“So, you need to go blow dry him and comb him since he’s just been through a stuffing and then we can pick out clothes or other things for him.” She stood up and explained, leading Iden over to the next station where he dutifully took care of his new friend, Kylo.

Anything a stuffed toy could possibly desire was hanging on the wall before the check-out. There was helmets for bears, jet packs, wigs, cell phones, hates, flowers, power blasters, purses, bandanas, and even stuffed animals for the stuffed animal. For a moment, Iden looked over a pair of sunglasses for his rabbit. He hugged it again and the Imperial March sound distracted him.

“Do you want any of this for Kylo?” Mike tried to keep them focused. He was enjoying himself, but he knew that they were expected back by now.

“No.” Iden shook his head, surprising his Dad.

“Are you sure?” Michael thought that if he was a kid and he was given permission that he would get his stuffed animal one of everything. Well, maybe not the satin flowers and plush cell phone, but bejeweled bucket hat, but everything else.

“He’s happy.” Iden shrugged content. To Iden, that was what he figured Kylo’s heartbeat was telling him. He was perfectly fine as is. Besides, bunnies didn’t wear clothes or have cell phones. Iden didn’t know too much for certain, but he did know that as well as he knew that his Dad was the fastest tickle monster and his Mom gave the world’s best goodnight squeezes.

Michael chose not to argue with Iden. They went to the desk where Emmeline’s medicine waited for them and filled out Kylo Rabbit’s information, using Skye’s work phone number instead of their own as everybody did and John Feldman’s office address as Kylo’s home address. Michael liked the idea of John constantly being sent Build a Bear catalogues and he didn’t like giving out his personal information. As Michael paid, Iden waited with the sales girl for Kylo Rabbit’s birth certificate. He was pleased to see that they were both born in Sydney, Australia even though Kylo Ren-Cifford had only just been born now in Cleveland.

“Thank you, Daddy.” Iden almost shouted as he bounced out of the store, finally finished waving goodbye to the employee that helped them. Iden was in charge of holding his sister’s medicine now since the Build-a-Bear box that housed Kylo was nearly his size and he couldn’t carry it. He watched it move back and forth against his dad’s leg as they walked out of the mall, making a beeline for their rental car. Michael held his kid’s hand in the parking lot, telling him twice to not drop the paper bag. It wouldn’t be very good if they arrived home with a brand new bunny rabbit doll and not what they initially went out for in the first place.

Mike tossed the rabbit in it’s box into the backseat first and then buckled Iden up into his car seat. He couldn’t peel his son’s attention away from the box if it had been his job. Michael hadn’t even started the car and Iden had managed to reach over, pull apart the cardboard tabs and rescue Kylo-Ren Clifford. Before fully emerging from the parkade and into the city that he would have been lost in without the help of his loud GPS, Michael checked in the mirror and watched Iden pull faces at the bunny. It made him feel like the best Dad in the world for one second which meant a lot considering he always felt guilty for having a career that demanded him to be physically and often mentally away from his children. Everyone sacrificed their time for the band and Michael didn’t ever gloss over that fact. It had only been a half an hour of one on one time with Iden, but Michael felt like today he had been able to do it all. He fulfilled his career responsibilities, helped Luke out with a personal complaint, sent pictures of his kids to his parents, bought Emmeline her medicine, made Iden’s day, and if the night went as planned, he was going to make his wife cum twice back to back. Today, Michael managed to do everything.

She couldn’t resist. Mariona had one leg hanging off her boyfriend’s bed with the rabbit in the small nook her folded leg on the bed made. While Iden explained Kylo to his her, she had moved his drawings to the floor. She pushed her two thumbs into it’s stomach, but nothing happened. She looked behind her at Iden, lying with his hands behind in his head and his knee against her hip. He was watching amused as she tried to make his rabbit play the Star Wars song. Mariona tried again before leaning back and resting her head against Iden’s firm chest.

“I’m afraid your bunny doesn’t work anymore. Time for another trip to Build-a-Bear with your Dad.”

Iden just smiled slightly to himself and reached down to pick it up from her waist where it had flopped over. He held it above his face with squinted eyes, somehow silently communicating into the black beads it wore in it’s face, and then he brought it down and hugged it to his body, right beside Mariona’s head, and let the song play proudly.

“You’re not his best friend.” Joking, Iden deadpanned and shrugged. He let out a laugh as Mariona rolled her eyes at him. He leaned down and kissed the top of her head before putting Kylo down. As much as the rabbit meant to him, it also reminded him of a rare time in his life where he had his Dad’s complete attention all to himself. Even though Iden went back and forth between  his parent’s respective places at the moment, it wasn’t as if he wasn’t sharing his Dad with the world anymore. He still did have his Dad’s crazy schedule to fit into as well as trying to tip toe in between Emmeline’s over the phone freak outs. Iden wasn’t a little kid anymore. His dad wasn’t his idol any longer, but he was trying to figure out where they fit in one anothers lives. Right now, though, he just wanted to make out with his girlfriend. His hands slid smoothly down Mariona’s side as she adjusted herself to be lying on her stomach, crawling up his chest until she was sitting over his hips and kissing him back. She always thought she was okay at kissing, but Iden’s topsy turvy tongue had taught her tricks that she thought were made up by screenwriters. He knew how to illicit goosebumps all over her body. She had never found herself feeling as feverish as she did when Iden was kissing her, hands sliding underneath the back of her top. As the two of them fumbled on top of his bed, Iden kicked one leg off the mattress, making room for Mariona to press her hips into his. He just about had her big sweater over head when his foot found Kylo-Ren Clifford’s stomach, sending the Imperial March through his room. Both teenagers parted their mouths, exchanging confused expressions for a second, and then broke out laughing.

[btsreactionsandtexts]

BTS Single Parent AU

kookies-and-myrok asked: Hello, sweets! I love your writing and I'm not just saying that Lol i always get excited when you post smt, anyways do you write parent au's? If you do can I get a BTS reaction about what they would be like as a single parent? If not then its okay! Keep up the great work 💜

This doesn’t necessarily work as a reaction, but I can do a little like... bullet drabble or whatever on this. Either way, very doable. - Admin Dayna

Seokjin

There’s like... this anime called Amaama to Inazuma (a.k.a. Sweetness and Lightning) which is basically about a single father who raises his daughter to the best of his abilities but he can’t cook as well as his wife (who passed away). I see Single Parent!Jin being like that... except in Jin’s case he can actually throw down in a kitchen

Lots of love and affection

Smothers his baby girl with kisses before dropping her off to daycare and after picking her up

The daycare moms thirst after him bOI

His cookies sold out the fastest at the school bakery

Partially because Daycare Moms are trying to give him the succ

Mainly because his cookies are bomb asf

He got hoes

Reads/sings his daughter to sleep at night religiously

Chocolate covered Strawberries while they watch cartoons together

Shed a single tear in the beginning of Finding Nemo evRYTIM

Was literally floating on air for like a month because his daughter told him he was the “handsomest appa”

Tries really hard to scold his baby girl

Can’t look her in the face when he does it because she’s too damn cute

Puppy Dog Eyes work every once in a while tbh

Will cAUSE A FUCKING SCENE IF HE EVER HEARD SOMEONE WAS BULLYING HIS CHILD

Dad jokes, fucking duh.

Yoongi

Picture this: Yoongi is chilling, right? Lounging on the sofa, watching some psychological mystery film or whatever emo shit he watches. His face is pretty indifferent. He’s unbothered asf. His right arm is covered in scribbles and squiggles. His 7 year old son is currently surrounded by markers, casually doodling on his dad’s arm.

Lets his son choose whatever toys he wants

If his baby boy wants a nerf gun, he’ll get a nerf gun.

If his baby boy wants a fucking bubblegum pink barbie jeep atv, he’s getting a fucking bubblegum pink barbie jeep atv.

Also lets his kid wear whatever he wants

Supports the creative and imaginative endeavors of his child

Does not support coloRING ON THE WALL YOU LIL DEMON BABY

Sometimes stares at his child and thinks “whose mans is this?”

Also looks at his child and thinks “that’s the love of my life”.

One time considered redecorating his closet just so that he can hang a bunch of mirrors on the wall so that whenever his child does something stupid, he can sit him in that closet and close the door so that he can look at his reflection and reevaluate his 7 years long life.

All in all he’s a super supportive daddio.

He’s not like the other dads.

He’s a Cool Dad™

Hoseok

Sitcom dad.

Literally Phil Dunphy from Modern Family.

Tell his kids a lot of stories about his “glory days”

His preteen daughter is like... hella embarrassed by him, but is highkey just as dorky as he is

Still got the juice

Can be super stern when need be

His kids knows that if they have an issue they can always talk to him about it

Has the warmest hugs when the days been rough

Shares both maternal and fraternal instincts 

Can flawlessly switch between motherly and fatherly traits

Tries to make inside jokes with his children

It never works.

“Stop trying to make fetch happen, Hobi. It’s not going to happen”

The best hype man tbh

“YOU SEE THE KID IN THE WHITE SHIRT? THAT’S MINE. I MADE HIM”

Namjoon

You know that cliche where it’s like... the mom leaves the kids alone with the father for a day. And the dad is like “don’t worry honey, I got this” but then the second the mom leaves, there’s toys everywhere, the kids are running around naked, the water he was boiling is on fire, shit has literally hit the fan, the groUND HAS ACTUALLY SPLIT OPEN INTO THE FIERY PITS OF HELL - but he last minute manages to get everything together and in order before the mom comes and finds out? 

That’s Namjoon.

Except like... 24/7 without the mom

Super fast dad reflexes

Also kinda annoying dad noises?

Really good at tutoring the kids with school work and stuff

He taught them majority of their math and science formulas by turning them into catchy songs

Has given up trying to be the cool dad yEARS ago

He’s just not about that life

It’s okay though because his kid’s friends thinks he’s cool

Makes sure his children are WOKE ASF

Tries to enforce bedtime

Keeps them up at night by playing games and/or watching movies together

Lets them go out whenever they want as long as they keep in touch often

Lets his kids make mistakes and learn from them instead of sheltering them from harms way

Motivational Speeches that are actually motivational

God awful happy dances

Hangs his kids A+ test papers on the fridge

“If you show me you got straight A’s at the end of the semester, you can absolutely get your nose pierced” (he says to his 14 year old daughter).

Jimin

Everyone knows that one person who has that really young but super hot mom or dad. Like, they’re lowkey popular and often have friends over because their friends kinda just want to be around their good looking parent.

Stacy’s Mom got it going on

Except it’s like... idk... Park Jae Sun’s Appa got it going on...

Whatever you get what I mean.

He’s a Dilf

Lets his kid invite his friends over whenever they want to

Doesn’t realize that his child’s friends are high key checking him out

Constantly checking up on them to see how they’re doing

“Are you guys okay?”

“Is the house too cold?”

“Would you like something to eat/drink?”

“Let me know if you need anything, okay?”

“Don’t be afraid to ask”

A little overbearing if I’m going to be honest

May even shelter his child a little too much

Good morning texts and sticky note reminders around the house

Makes sure his child has food for school everyday, never missing a beat

Proud Dad always

His son is bigger than him

Has to look up at him in order to look his son in the eye to properly reprimand or lecture him

Gets pissed whenever he isn’t taken seriously when giving scoldings

Feels really bad whenever he punishes his kids, and makes up for it with like ice cream or something

Babies make his little mochi heart flutter

Taehyung

He’s the epitome of husband/daddy material.��I think Taehyung would make a great dad. He’s the perfect balance of literally all the others.

Which one is the parent and which one is the kid?

Knows how to get down to the level of a child, and properly play with them

Inside jokes with his kids

They say goodbye with aegyo

Openly tells each other they love one another

Likes to squish his baby’s cheeks and blow raspberries on their tummy

Loves the satisfying feeling that follows finally putting a crying baby to sleep

Watches his baby’s tummy rise and fall as they breathe

Hysterically laughs at his child’s laughter

His box smile is strong, and can literally be found in all of his kids.

Also has like, three dogs, but the more the merrier, right?

Isn’t too hard on his kids, but isn’t lenient on them either

Is a healthy medium between strict and easy going

Enforces a proper education but also lets them know that school isn’t the only way to a successful and happy lifestyle

Plays pretend with his children on the weekend

Always ends up in a too small princess dress with ribbons in his hair

Jungkook

You know those kids who are extremely close to their parents to the point where it’s like... and outsider watches the way they talk to their parents and finds it their causality with each other borderline disrespectful? You know those kids who can like... curse around their parents and talks to their parents like it’s another one of their friends and their parent talks back to them just as casually? 

That’s the type of dad Jungkook is.

Plays video games with his kids whenever their schedules allow them some free time together

Him and his kids have a group chat together where they share memes and ugly selfies but also like... keep up to date with school events and whatnot

Follows each other on Snapchat, Twitter, and Instagram

Not the best with giving advice, but his kids know that he’s a shoulder they can cry on

Offers to help them with homework, but ends up just as confused 

They all live off snacks and the neighborhood ahjumma had to start cooking actual meals for them

His kids actually care and asks their dad’s opinion on stuff about like... hair or clothing or something

He picks up on his kids habits and his kids pick up on his

they look like a bunch of bunnies tbh

They all have their own rooms, but Jungkook and his kids always manage to fall asleep dog piled on the living room sofa

[strainingfororiginality]

7.1 - Choices

I'm fired up and tired of the way that things have been, oh ooh

The way that things have been, oh ooh

Second thing

Second, don't you tell me what you think that I can be

I'm the one at the sail, I'm the master of my sea, oh ooh

The master of my sea, oh ooh

I was broken from a young age

Taking my soul into the masses

Write down my poems for the few

That looked at me took to me, shook to me, feeling me

Singing from heart ache from the pain

She had no idea where they were, but they walked quickly and with determination down the cobblestone streets of Rome. EL lead the way and she could feel the electricity of the anticipation humming through the air as she walked through the cold, damp night as Thomas trailed closely behind her.

There was something particularly special about this moment and she felt that same strange feeling again. The feeling that she felt in her dream the moment before she turned and faced her sister, The Corruptor, for the first time. It was time … and it was vibrating all around her, sending the hairs on her arms straight up. Something substantial was about to occur.

EL stopped at the corner, pointing down a conspicuously dark alley. They’d left the comforts of the more touristy parts of the city well over a mile ago, and he weaved them through a rather seedy looking residential area and now he pointed down into the darkness.

"There. Do you see it?" EL chimed.

Even with Quintus’ ridiculously dark glasses on, she could indeed see. There was a metal door and a man sitting on a stool in front of it. A big man. Scratch that. A HUGE man. This man easily had at least six inches on Fet. Jesus … Christ.

To say he was "muscular" wasn’t doing his physique justice and he bared them for all to see with a skin tight black wife beater. His skin was a reddish color, seeming as though he’d gotten a bit too much sun, but she knew that was likely not the case. The reddish tint was his natural color. He was bald, but his face was covered in thick black facial hair. His eyes were hidden behind dark glasses, just like her.

Interesting.

"Half-breed Ifrit." EL explained. “Yeah, he’s big … but it’s so very rarely about size. Trust me, he’s no match for you. And he’s not what I’m talking about … do you see it?”

"See what?" She asked and Thomas peered around her, looking down the alleyway to spy whatever she could have been talking about.

"The glyph. It’s the password. Open your mind, little Dawn. Use the Eyes of God." EL touched the very side of her temple as his finger sparked with red and she saw the door behind the man illuminate with celestial symbols. A single row of them, vertical along the metal. Enochian.

"Holy shit."

"Fucking Order of Argaman. Sneaky little shits." EL laughed. “They’re everywhere these days. Breeding like little fucking bunnies.”

"Here? Why so close to Quintus?" She asked. “Did he know about them?”

"Exactly. Exactly. It’s not coincidence that the most powerful Marid Djinn lives mere miles from him. They’ve been keeping an eye on him since he was born."

"But why?" She countered.

"Fear? Caution? Envy?" EL shrugged, waving off her question. “Who the fuck cares? I guess we can ask Abyad if you’re really curious.”

Fair enough.

She turned back, nodding to Thomas, who held the briefcase full of money and that precious celestial book in his grip, and he nodded back as he tugged his suit straight down, removing wrinkles from it before checking the tightness of his tie as he asked. "Is this the place?"

"Should we really have brought the Lumen?" She asked EL again. She’d pushed for them to leave it at the condo and he’d refused. “It’s risk--”

"I don’t want it out of our sight and … Abyad isn’t going to take the offer seriously unless he knows we have it." EL could see the worry breaking through her spotted face and he smirked with a playful wink. “No one’s gonna be able to take it from you. You have no idea what you are capable of now.”

"Ok." She took a deep and long breath, pulling the hood as far forward as it would go and began to take a step from the sidewalk to approach the massive bouncer. “Let’s do this then.”

"Aurora … Wait." EL stepped in front of her and she looked up into his rainbow eyes with growing confusion. “It’s not too late to turn back.”

"What?" She asked with wide and lovely eyes. “Turn back? Why would I--”

"This is the moment when you can chose to go back to how it was before. If you step through that door … If things go sideways." There was bitter hesitation in his words and he pushed himself to continue as his lips curled up into a sneer. “It’s not too late.”

"Not too late for what?"

"To turn back." EL was genuine in this offer and she could feel the apprehension in his mind as he asked her to turn back. “… you can find happiness somewhere else.”

"After all of this? You think I should just … give up now?"

"It's not giving up." He shook his head. “It’s healing. Letting memories of those lost fade.”

"And you?" She asked simply. “Have you healed … after losing her? Has her memory faded?” She knew it hadn’t, because she saw how crisp and clear and bitter his vision of Lilith had been.

"That’s not the same." He snapped. “She was--”

"Yes. It’s exactly the same." She snapped back as she tried to walk around him.

"Aurora … " He grabbed her arm firmly. “Diana.”

"Don’t call me that. That’s not my name anymore." She spat, trying to pull her arm from him but he ignored her protests. “Yesterday is dead. She’s dead.”

"We can walk away from this. Forget this. Forget him. Live your life. Move on. We can be free--"

"You don’t understand …" She pulled her arm from his grip and his brows furrowed in disappointment. “The choice was already made … long before today.”

As she stepped around him, she took several steps before he spoke again.

"And if you are wrong …"

Stopping in her stride, she didn’t turn back to him as she answered. "Wrong about what?"

"What if he’s moved on. What if … he doesn’t want to come back?" EL asked. “What if he’s found peace? What if he’s found happiness?”

Dawn closed her eyes tightly as she tried to push that doubt away and crossed the street to the manned door without a further word to him on the subject, but Quintus’ voice rattled through her mind. That most painful and agonizing sentence that so often plagued her confidence.

"I have loved one and only one in all of my life, and I plan to ONLY love her … I go there with her on my mind and in my heart, always. She awaits me in eternity. It would be … unfair to you for me to pretend otherwise."

Clenching her jaw, she fought back the tears that were already welling in her eyes and her heart hurt as his voice, that night when he had fully rejected her lips, rattled in her mind.

Could she turn back now? Was EL right? Could she choose to walk away?  From Quinuts?  From whatever path Lilith had set her on even before she was born?

No. Because it was Lilith who was right. The choice was already made. She made it in that cabin … She chose him and he had chosen her.

     Derede.

          Surrender.

Oh, she doesn't know much

But she knows this

Life's too short not to take risks

Oh, she steals herself and she goes for luck

He looked her up and down carefully as he picked at his teeth with his unnatural tongue. She was tiny, packing two miniature uzis that he was certain she couldn’t handle. He could see the outline of the extra ammo in her pockets and the unmenacing short blade strapped to her back. Seeing her approach, he might have exercised caution because of the armoury, but he could hear the nervous beating of her heart and he smiled.

Next, he eyed the gentleman directly behind her. Obviously, this was the man in charge and his cool, collected, and calm demeanour showed that. He was dressed professionally in a gray suit and wasn’t packing anything but a fancy briefcase.

"Got a problem?" The curvy woman asked him menacingly as he stared down upon her incredibly short stature.

"I think you’re lost, little thing." He chuckled. “This ain’t the place for your kind.”

"We would like entry into your establishment." The older man from behind her spoke with a thick german accent and for the first time, he got a whiff of something inhuman from his breath.

Hmmmm. Unbound Stryx Scum.

"We don’t allow your kind here." He huffed at them, flicking his jaw back towards the road to urge them to get lost.

"My kind?" The strigoi took offense, bringing his hand up and touching his chest.

"No." He looked down at the woman, smirking as he spoke. “Hers. We don’t cater to humans here.”

"Who says I’m human?" She queried curiously cocking her hooded head to the right. “Besides, I’m only half ... just like you ... am I right?”

"Yer a bit tiny for a half-breed, firecracker." He pulled his sunglasses down, exposing his red irises to her fully, he slid off his stool to eye her more closely, taking a deep breath of her scent in. “Password then?”

She looked at the door, up and down before she smiled, reading it clearly. "Tainted Boomerang."

He hadn’t changed it in a few hours and he reached back, tapping the metal until the words shifted again at his will and she grinned wider.

"Essential Screwdriver."

Hmmmm. She didn’t look like a Djinn. She was so small. He tapped it again and the words shifted while her smile never faded and she stared at him, without even moving her face to read the door.

"Old Torpedo."

He tapped again as something worried him about this woman, but the man, clearly in charge, spoke up from behind her. "Is this really necessary? We do not have all night."

"Fine." He placed himself back onto the stool. “But the weapons stay here.”

"My … weapons?" She paused as she reached back for the sword handle defensively.

He shook his head. "You can keep your tiny little pigsticker. I ain’t worried about that. But the guns. They stay or so do both of you."

As she hesitated, she looked off to the corner, as if she was listening for something and the man spoke again. "Fraulein, do not worry. I am sure we can have them back when we exit?" The last part was a question directed to the bouncer and he nodded.

"Fine." She sneered, reluctantly pulling the guns from their holsters.

She was actually expecting a dark and dirty nightclub, but what she was met with was something far more elegant and bright. White and silver … everywhere.

"Well …" EL quipped, walking in front of her with a spin as they entered a massive hall. “He is Abyad, The White, after all.”

There was a bar, there were tables, there was music. A singer. A piano. A grand staircase. It was a nightclub, for all intents and purposes, but it was bright. The walls were clean and white. The tables and chairs all shiny silver. The people within it, however, were just as grungy as she would have expected, but they were far from human.

As they made their way to the bar, Dawn pulled out the stool and hoisted herself up to it, cursing her short stature as her legs dangled aimlessly from the height of it. Thomas opted to stand, leaning over the counter before jerking his arm back suddenly as she heard a sizzle and smelled his burnt flesh.

"Scheisse!" He rubbed his palm and eyed the counter suspiciously and the flecks of silver along its shiny marble surface.

"Haha! Fuckin’ Silver. It’s everywhere." EL explained with amusement at Thomas’ shock. “Abyad has a thing for it. He can derive power from it. Every Djinn King has a metal they can pull from, but it’s also their weakness. Dad was never without a sense of humor, you know.”

"Derives power?" She asked lowly, staring at Eichhorst as if she was asking the question to him and not the invisible entity off to her right.

"You’ll be able to do the same, and not just with one thing." EL smiled as his eyes trailed up the grand staircase and to the second floor. She followed his gaze. “With everything and everyone around you.”

The second floor balcony was open and several large men, easily as large as the one outside, stood around the entrance to the stairs. Important looking men shuffled about, around fancy furniture and, even with her glasses on, she could see a massive fireplace at the end of the open room.

"He’ll be the one in white." EL chuckled. “Of course.”

Her eyes moved from man to man. Two guards. Five men, mostly in suits. She couldn’t see a man in white, but she saw a man in black, with long brown hair and tattoos across his face and trimmed dark facial hair. All in all, he was awfully attractive.

"Hey. Focus." EL said with disgust.

"What’ll you have?" Her attention shifted back to the man behind the counter who approached for their drink orders and that incessant itch in the back of her mind began again. She could hear someone screaming … crying. It was the same thing that happened earlier with Eichhorst.

"Do you have B-Positive?" Thomas asked and the bartender nodded.

"You?"

Her hand trembled, coming up to her head as she tried to force the screaming woman’s voice away. "Your strongest. Whatever it is."

"Sweetheart, I don’t think you can handle our strongest. That ain’t for human consumption."

"Yeah right, buddy." EL laughed out loud. “Fucking pleb.”

She smiled slightly as EL used her favorite term, she cocked her head as her nervousness began to finally dissipate. "Did I stutter?"

"Your funeral, ma’am." The older man shrugged and walked away to retrieve their orders. As the distance between them increased, the screams faded away and her hand came down. EL leaned against the bar, staring down into her face, waiting for her to ask with a raised eyebrow. She could tell he already knew.

"What is that?" She shook her head slightly. “What’s happening to me?”

"That?" He grinned. “The Ears of God. You’re becoming, Aurora. Your divinity is charging.”

"Ears of God?" She remembered Abraham calling the scream that the Master did the Voice of God. He picked up on this thought immediately.

"Not just the Master. You remember the base. You remember what you did to all those men when you thought they killed him. THAT was The Voice of God."

"Yeah." She remembered the pain, both hers and theirs. She remembered screaming. “What is it though … the Ears? I keep hearing people … ”

"You can hear their sinful pasts. When you learn to listen more clearly, you’ll be able to make them out with absolute clarity. Right now, you’re only picking up the echos of the most sinful ones."

Dawn looked back at Eichhorst, who was already scanning the room and the balcony, the same as she had. The screams she heard from him early were much louder than the crying woman she heard from the bartender just now. The screams from the Nazi were hundreds … maybe thousands of people and she shuddered.

"Oh yes." EL smirked with pleasure as he licked his lips greedily. “Thomas is quite a bad boy. I’ve been looking forward to getting my hands on his soul for quite some time now.”

"It’s fucking annoying.  How do I turn it off?”  She scrunched her nose and EL laughed out loud.

“Turn it off?  You can’t.  It’s useful though.  You’ll learn.”

“Ok.  Eyes, Voice, Ears. What else is there?" She wondered. The voice, the ears … but the bartender was back, setting the blood down first and pushing a shot glass over to her with a liquid that looked like it was pure mercury. Perhaps liquid silver. She could smell the alcohol scent it emitted and she cringed at its intensity.

Hmmmm.

"Thank you very much." Thomas nodded, reaching into his suit pocket to retrieve his billfold. “How much is owed?”

"On the house, Herr Eichhorst." The bartender smiled and nodded up towards the balcony.

As both of their gazes shifted, the man in all black, with the tattoos on his face, tilted a glass towards Thomas and grinned with a head nod.

"How do they know you?" She asked with a concerned whisper and Thomas shook his head. “Do you know them?””

"I do not know, little one." His voice was riddled with just as much concern and the man with the tattoos walked to a guard at the top of the staircase entrance, pointing to Thomas. As the guard began to walk down the steps, Dawn took a deep breath in.

"Relax." EL assured her. “There’s no way they wouldn’t know this Nazi piece of shit. They’ve been watching the Ancients, the same as Quintus. Thomas almost helped destroy the world, right? Watch and wait.”

As the guard approached them, Dawn took the liquid and downed it in one gulp. She had expected it to burn, but it was ice cold and she could feel an immediate numbing sensation begin to tingle her entire body, starting in her throat, and emanating out to the rest of her body in waves. Finally some alcohol that fucking worked.

"Whoa." Escaped her mouth before she could stop it and EL giggled.

"Silver Fire." He named it.

"Mr. Reynolds would like a word with you, Herr Eichhorst." The guard had a posh English accent and it surprised her for the size of him. At a closer distance, it was clear he wasn’t quite as big as the man outside, more Fet’s size and his skin was actually quite pale, nearly white. It reminded her of Quintus somewhat.

"Marid half-breed. Far more dangerous than the bouncer, but … as I keep saying …" EL walked around him, looking him up and down. “Nothing for us to worry about.”

Plebs.

"Very good." Thomas said, putting down his half-drunk glass of blood and turning, still clutching the briefcase to his chest as he took a step to follow the man.

When she attempted the same, the guard turned quickly, putting a hand out to halt her. "Just him."

This immediately put Thomas on guard, as he turned back to her with a concerned and somewhat frightened face. "Absolutely not. She is my bodyguard." In all actuality, this wasn’t far from the truth at all and the look of sudden fear across his face made her realize it wasn’t that he was scared of her at all. He was scared of them.

The guard laughed a scoff at the statement as he looked back at the bone sword handle. "All the more reason she stays here then. Just you. This isn’t a request."

"Let him go. See if he can negotiate this on his own." EL sat down at the stool beside. “We’ll play it by ear.”

"Ok." She said, nodding at Thomas to comply. “But the moment he’s out of my sight, I’m coming up there.”

"Yeah. Right." The guard laughed again and she wished so much to wipe that smirk off of his goddamn face.

Yeah … Right.

"Fucking plebs." EL chimed again with growing amusement as he turned and flicked his chin towards the Nazi as he slowly and calmly climbed the stairs. “Now … use your senses. Listen.”

"How hard is it to find one man?" Abyad asked with annoyance as he stared into the massive fire. “ONE MAN?! We have kept dibs on the Ancients and their slippery little progeny for years and yet Barqan is still nowhere to be found?!”

"Sir." One of the men said as he shifted uncomfortably. “Your brother is not a man and for that matter, he is not just a Djinn. He is The Black King. He and the others vanished immediately after--”

"Nor is he Hayyoth, yet he’s still managing to evade us even now?" Abyad scoffed, turning back to the fire to add a log as his silver eyes danced in its light behind his dark glasses and he forced the fire left and right with the mere flick of his mind. “This is unacceptable. Why would he even feel the need to hide from me? What the bloody hell could he be hiding? He’s been in a bottle for ten thousand years for Christ’s sake.”

"And you’re absolutely certain he wasn’t caught in the explosion?" Raum joined the conversation and asked as he placed his hand on the handle of the scimitar sheathed on his right hip, walking back from the stairs after requesting the guard to retrieve the Nazi downstairs.

"No." Abyad said. “Barqan lives. I feel it. He’s hiding something from us, otherwise he would have come home already.”

"And us? Why don’t we go home? Why are we still here?" Raum asked. “The Prince of Snakes is gone. Dead. Finally. Why are we not free from this … task? Has there been no word from Argaman at all?”

Abyad was normally a cheerful man, but he turned with frustration across his face. "The god remains silent. Since the gates of Heaven were locked when this strigoi war began, there are eyes and ears everywhere. We will hear from him soon enough. Until then, we wait for a sign of the Nephilim Prince."

"What’s the point--" Raum started to argue but Abyad cut him off with a whimsical smile.

"You know the same as I … Until I see his god forsaken body with my own fucking eyes, the Invictus reappear at any time. He has done so before. I have no doubts he will do so again."

"Sir, no one could have survived--"

"Really? Did Ozryel not?" Abyad quipped and Raum fell silent. “Did the reports not say Ozryel was seen, breaching the clouds after the Face of God fell on that lake, soaring back into the bosom of Heaven? Is the Prince not born from Ozryel’s blood?”

"Yes." Raum nodded.

"Then we wait. Until I see his rotting, lifeless corpse. We wait. We have both witnessed that abomination pull himself out of the ashes after the most unsurvivable scenarios. My god, have you forgotten Vesuvius already?"

"No …" Raum laughed with wide eyes as he remembered it while lightning cracked outside. “No, I absolutely have not. I still don’t understand how he could have walked away from that.”

"Exactly. He is Hayyoth. They are born of richer fire than even we are. We wait … do what we have been told until we hear from the Order."

The conversation fell quiet as the men shifted, seeing that the guard had brought the Nazi to them. "Ahhhh … Herr Eichhorst. Do have a seat … please."

She stared down at the counter, tapping the newly filled shot glass, sloshing the thick, silvery liquid around within it. She wasn’t really staring at the counter though, she was focusing. She was listening.

"Raum, your hot one, is his left hand. He’s full-blooded Marid. Deadly and old. Not a king though … more like a Earl." EL explained while she listened to them exchange pleasantries.

"Forgive me …" Thomas said graciously. “But do we know each other? I am certain I would not have forgotten someone such as you.”

"Of course not." She hadn’t seen him yet, but the voice was obviously the King’s. “You would definitely remember me if we had met formally.” He was almost whimsical in how he addressed people.

Ego. He overestimated himself.

She could hear, in the delivery of his words, that he was smiling, believing he had the upper hand still. Perhaps always.

"But of course we know of you, Herr Eichhorst. The Right Hand of the Right Hand." A laugh. He was enjoying thinking he had the upper hand. “Lost your way since your Master left you here? What brings you into our humble city?”

Hubris.

"But of course it is YOU who have brought us here, your majesty." Thomas quipped back, playing up to the obvious ego cleverly. There was a palpable hesitation from The King, as Thomas addressing him as royalty showed a bit of knowledge on the strigoi’s part. No doubt the King was sizing him up right now, trying to determine how much Thomas might have learned from his Master. “You have heard of me, just as I have heard of you, Murrah al-Abyad Abu al-Harith, The White King.” She could hear Thomas bowing slightly.

"Hmmm." A hesitation. A pause. Tension. Negotiation. Push and pull. Eichhorst did what he does best and he maintained complete composure and coolness. No one moved and she nearly heard Abyad considering what to say next. Thomas was nudging his buttons gently. Clever. “Indeed. So … What brings you before me, Herr Eichhorst?”

"I seek to pay for services that I am told only you can provide." Thomas patted the briefcase.

"Services?" The White laughed heartily. “You think I’ll service you? I don’t service anyone. Let alone a lost little rat like you?”

"You will be paid, of course." Thomas said plainly. “Quite generously. We are not without our resource--”

"You think I need your money." A laugh. Hubris. Her lips curled up in aggravation and EL’s hand on her shoulder calmed her growing fire. “Look around, abomination. You have nothing I want.”

"Perhaps not then." Thomas stood, buttoning his jacket back together as he began to turn and she furrowed her golden brows, frustration mounting. “Forgive the intrusion then. Have a good day, your majesty.”

"He knows what he’s doing. He can read the room quite well." EL assured.

"How much are we talking about?" The Nazi only made it two steps before Abyad bit. “And … what service, exactly, is it that you wish from me?”

She smiled.

Hubris and greed.

"My King." Thomas turned back, returned, and sat. He brought the briefcase up to set it on something as she heard his mouth turn up into a devilish grin. “I have been told that you may be able to turn this into something more … useful for me.”

The briefcase clicked and she heard it open as the vibrations emanating from the book within flooded the entire building. Several patrons picked up on it immediately, and their gazes turned up towards the balcony. Others stood.

EL smiled as he popped off the stool and took a wide look around, clapping his hands.

"Now … We get to see if he’s willing to play ball."

“And if he doesn’t?”  She asked but EL only smiled devlishly in return.

Hesitation. Palpable silence. Seconds of nothing then …

"My book …"

[ersonist]

title: yesterday’s just a memory, tomorrow is never what it’s supposed to be

rating: t

word count: 2k1

summary: It’s not every day someone you know gets kicked in the head and forgets a couple of years of their life or modern AU amnesia fic.

a/n: I was checking my dash the other day and @hurricanedancer​ reblogged  this amazing post and mentioned in the tags wanting a fic. I was already planning to write something for Cassian Andor Appreciation Week (Favourite Relationship(s)) and this inspired me so I combined both. No such thing as too many RebelCaptain fics, right? Anyway hope you enjoy it :)

(I wrote the fic, but Bob Dylan wrote the title.)

Cassian wakes up to the blinding lights and whispers that are way too loud for his pounding headache. He vaguely identifies the place as a hospital but he’s not sure how he got here.

“Welcome back,” he hears a woman’s voice tell him in a British accent and his confusion deepens. Must be one of Kay’s relatives, he decides.

And then there’s a flurry of movement around him, people asking him questions, calling a doctor, squeezing his hand. It’s exhausting so he closes his eyes and lets himself fall asleep again.

The next time he wakes up the room is significantly darker and emptier. He notices a sole figure half sitting, half leaning on a chair next to his bed.

“What happened?” he asks, his hoarse voice slightly breaking over the last word.

“You don’t remember?” the young woman looks at him with a clear concern when he shakes his head no.

“You tried to be a hero, stopping a bunch of guys from stealing a car.”

“They clearly won,” he states, hesitantly smiling at her.

“Yep, you got your ass kicked,” she openly smirks back. She fluffs an extra pillow that doesn’t look hospital issued before helping him to lean back comfortably. She’s cute. Whoever she is, he thinks.

“So what’s your name?”

Her hands start shaking and he figures this was a wrong question to ask.

Amnesia sounds too much like something out of Mexican soap operas he used to watch with his grandmother. The neurologist tries to be optimistic but there are too many we don’t know and we can’t predict that for Cassian to share her positive attitude. His room is crowded again but he can’t really blame anyone. It’s not every day someone you know gets kicked in the head and forgets a couple of years of their life. Still he averts his eyes refusing to witness their pity. The problem is that except for feeling a bit weak, he is fine. The headache is gone, he can stomach solid food again and frankly all he wants to do is go home. Unless...

“Do I still live where I lived back then?” he interrupts impatiently. How much could his life have changed in two years anyway? A new girlfriend does not define his entire existence.

He doesn’t like the anxious looks they all share.

“More or less,” Bodhi finally informs him without actually replying to his question.

He lives with Jyn now. That’s the news everyone, Jyn herself included, was gently trying to break to him. Honestly he would’ve guessed the minute he stepped into his (their?) apartment. Hot pink bunny slippers weren’t exactly his style.

“It was an inside joke,” Jyn mutters defensively when she follows his gaze to the offending items, carelessly thrown near the living room couch. She picks the slippers up and stuffs them into the small closet in the hallway.

It’s the oddest thing in the world. This virtual stranger who has her things all over Cassian’s living space and sometimes watches him with fondness and love he doesn’t understand.

The uncomfortable silence stretches a bit too long for his liking. He did suggest crashing at Kay’s but they all thought he should re-familiarise himself with his usual surroundings. Plus Jyn seemed determined in showing how much this doesn’t bother her.

“You have an unusual name,” he points out, slightly cringing at how terrible he is at small talk.

“Like gin and tonic, right?” she laughs and he joins her.

“Please tell me men don’t use that as a pick-up line!” he jokes with more ease. He plops on the couch now covered with a soft, grey blanket and stretches languidly. Jyn doesn’t say anything for a moment, just plays with the sleeve of her shirt.

“That’s actually what you said when we first met.”

Trying to trigger lost memories is a perfectly acceptable treatment for amnesiacs and Cassian doesn’t mind it at first. That changes by the 10th minute of a powerpoint presentation fully prepared and presented by Kay.

“Halloween party last year. Picture taken at approximately 2 am as judged by your frankly obvious intoxication,” Kay comments the current slide with his usual mixture of amazing detachment and complete disgust. “Is your memory back now?”

“No,” Cassian groans miserably. “Could you please speed this up?”

Kay straightens in his seat, towering over the desk even more.

“I was preparing a shortened version if you wish.”

“How long is that one?”

“47 pages but it’s not proofread yet.”

***

“3 hours, Leia! 3 fucking hours!” he complains later over a cup of coffee. “He even gave me a bound copy!”

“I know you forgot some stuff,” she comments with a grin that was clearly supposed to look innocent but comes out more like a devious smirk. “but I thought you remembered Kay was more like a robot than an actual human.”

He sighs and stirs in a spoonful of sugar. You drink more tea now, Jyn informed him one morning over the breakfast. He knows they have silly matching mugs and one cupboard is full of a specific earl grey blend she apparently can’t function without.

“How are things with Jyn?” Leia asks nonchalantly as if she could read Cassian’s thoughts.

He shrugs because he’s honestly at a loss for words. How to explain to his old friends that it’s like living with a roommate that you never asked for? Except that there used to be an us with that roommate and the more he thinks he can fall for her, the more she probably falls out of love?

“I sleep on the couch in my own apartment and I’m pretty sure my mere presence makes her want to cry,” he admits in the end. “She’s erm... she’s something else though.”

Leia nods and smiles encouragingly at him.

“But I think I get it. I get why he fell in love with her,” he concludes quietly. He never planned on confessing this much especially since he’s pretty sure Leia will blabber it all to Han and one way or another it’ll reach Jyn.

“You talk about yourself in third person,” she settles for a joke instead and he’s immensely grateful for it. “They did recommend you a shrink, right?”

***

“How about you scroll through my instagram and ask me questions if you want?” Bodhi suggests during their lunch the next day.

Cassian agrees more out of politeness than an actual wish to go through yet another “let’s make Cassian remember things” session. He checks one post after another. Birthday parties, a trip to the beach, Christmas drinks at a pub nearby. They all have one thing in common. If Jyn’s present, Cassian looks like a complete dork in every single one of them.

“Seriously you’d think I’d stop with those ridiculous starry eyes!” he exclaims while practically shoving the phone into Bodhi’s face. “Just look at that one, for example! We get it, Cassian, you’re happily in love!”

“Actually that was taken right before you officially met,” Bodhi explains slightly embarrassed and Cassian goes completely red in the face. 

He tries to find a specific document on his laptop when he stumbles upon a folder simply named “porn”. Judging by the creation date this was done by Jyn’s Cassian (as he secretly calls himself) and frankly he’s slightly worried about its content. He knows it’s a bad idea idea to go through it now, especially with Jyn sitting a few feet away from him furiously scribbling something on her work papers, but the curiosity wins. He clicks on one of the files at random and gets a cheesy selfie of both of them outside his apartment. He clicks another. This one has Jyn cooking and frankly looking beyond annoyed. There are hundreds of pics in the folder and Cassian has a feeling they all have a similar subject. He finally clicks on one of the few videos. It’s a terribly cliché shot of a beach sunset that moves slowly to Jyn sitting close to the camera, a cocktail in one hand, her shoulders a bit reddish from the sun. Mi amor, she calls to him laughingly and it suddenly reverberates around the silent room. Cassian desperately shuts his laptop but one glance in Jyn’s direction confirms she’s heard it loud and clear. She stays silent for a few seconds, biting her lip in an obvious attempt to keep a straight face.

“Are you watching porn, Cass?” she asks before finally bursting into laughter.

He realizes he enjoys his new life about 5 weeks after the incident. Sure it’s still awkward when he bumps into Jyn freshly out of shower and he’s still confused by a lot of stories he hears about himself but his new (old) friends turn out to be great and it’s nice not to be so lonely in life. 

Chirrut and Baze, the married couple who lives 2 floors above him, come over with a pizza one evening. Jyn’s working late again and the apartment is a mess but Cassian finds himself liking them a lot more than he thought he would.

“We’d bring Chinese but we don’t like to add to stereotypes,” Chirrut informs him when Baze drops the pizza boxes on the table, shoving aside what looks like Jyn’s white scarf and a brown shoelace.

“Sorry about the mess,” Cassian apologizes, helplessly looking around what used to be his pristine, minimalistic apartment. “Jyn tends to just leave her stuff everywhere.”

Like her toothbrush inexplicably abandoned on the coffee table at least three times this week. Or one of her boots on the kitchen floor. Or her bra casually hanging from the living room chair.

“We know,” Baze chuckles and hands him a slice of pizza. “You mentioned this when she moved in.”

“But things are good between you two?” Chirrut asks shamelessly and Baze just rolls his eyes.

“Yes, all’s good. She’s good. I’m good. It’s all... you know... good.”

Cassian is sure he can’t sink any lower than that. He chews his pizza for a moment before deciding that yes, of course he can: “Do you happen to have any stories about me and Jyn where I’m not making a fool out of myself?”

“Not really,” Baze answers very frankly and Chirrut chuckles at that. “You did learn all the British monarchs in chronological order just to impress her with your knowledge on all things UK.”

“And I suppose she was-”

“Very much not impressed,” Chirrut finishes triumphantly and Cassian just sighs in resignation.

He’s cooking dinner one night when he hears the front door open. Jyn drags herself in, kicking off her shoes and shrugging off her coat  and before he can ask about her zombie-like state she wraps her arms around him and buries her nose between his shoulder blades. He can’t help it - he freezes, his whole body suddenly tense which in turn makes her freeze, her lethargy instantly gone.

“Sorry, I wasn’t thinking,” she mumbles and Cassian grabs her wrists before she can fully pull away. Neither of them dares to move until he can feel her slightly relax, taking a tentative step closer. He lets go of her hands and smiles.

“Any plans for Saturday?” he casually asks her.

She moves then and leans on the kitchen counter, looking at him with suspicion.

“No. Why?”

“I thought we could go out,” he says softly, trying to sound as reassuring as he can. “Dinner, movies. What do you say?”

“Like a date?” There’s still a trace of doubt in her voice. Like it’s a trap or a cruel joke. It hurts him more than he thought it would.

“Yeah, like a date,” he tucks a strand of hair behind her ear and their eyes lock.

“Cassian,” she whispers, the tension suddenly overwhelming and he can’t help but wonder if this is it. The perfect moment for a kiss.

It’s not.

“Are you trying to be suave now?” She manages to utter between uncontrollable giggles.

“Laugh all you want,” he declares grumpily, “but one thing that I’ve learned these past weeks is how much of a lovesick fool I was around you.”

She laughs even harder at that.

“No, please, mock me some more,” he continues, turning back to the now slightly burned dinner. “I was like a mix of a total dork, a schoolboy with a crush and a fucking stalker.”

He hears her still howling with laughter and he’s genuinely unsure if he’s more embarrassed by Jyn’s Cassian or the current Cassian. But when she puts her hand on his arm and tenderly kisses his cheek it stops mattering.

He gets his memory back two days after their second first date.

[deadgwen]

IT IS A HAPPY 17TH BIRTHDAY TO THE BEST GOAT

@fucshias  @jiilys  MY LOVE GOATY. MY MOST BEAUTIFUL GOAT. MY SUN. MY STARS. MY BEAUTIFUL HOOVED CREATURE OF GOD. I HAVE ARRIVED TO SAY SOME IMPORTANT THINGS BUT FIRSTLY I LOVE YOU I LOVE I LOVE YOU U R READING THIS POST RIGHT NOW DUE TO A VERY IMPORTANT REASON AND THIS IMPORTANT REASON IS THAT

*CHOKES BACK TEARS*

IT IS UR BIRTHDAY.

*SCREAMING*

OK OKI DOKI BEFORE I START: I AM NOT ACTUALLY HERE BUT DO NOT BE D I S E N H E AR T E N E D BC I JUST DONT HAVE WIFI BUT I PROMISE U SOMEWHERE OUT THERE I AM SULKING AND FIGHTING A WALL AND ALSO SETTING OFF FIREWORKS BC !!!!!!!!!!!!! ITS UR FUCKING DAY AND IM SORRY I COULD NOT WISH U BUT I LOVE U SO SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH I AM HERE W/ U IN SPIRIT

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ALRIGHT TURN THE FUCK UP HAPPY FUCKING BIRTHDAY TO MY LOVE HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO U UR EXCELLENT AND I LOVE YOU AND ALSO WHAT THE FUCK BINCH HOW ARE U SEVENTEEN TODAY U ASSHOLE (COPYRIGHT U KNOW WHO) WHO ALLOWED U TO BE LIKE THIS AND ALSO I LOVE YOU. AND ALSO I CANT BELIEVE UVE DONE THIS. UR LITERALLY SEVENTEEN TODAY I AM NOT ALRIGHT AND I NEED U TO HOLD ME BECAUSE I AM GOING TO COME OVER AND FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE OF BEING A DRAMATIC BITCH I WILL FAINT IN UR ARMS I AM 100% NOT ALRIGHT

like,,,, HONESTLY u are so. fucking. great. WHERE DO I EVEN START. 

FIRST AND FOREMOST I WANNA SAY I AM SO FUCKING EXCITED FOR THIS FOR UR BDAY I LOVE YOU GOATY I AM SO PUMPED THAT UR SO OLD ITS RIDICULOUS @ ME FUCK OFF ALRIGHT BUT. JUST. I LOVE I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY U GOAT UR BEYOND INCREDIBLE

UR OFFICIALLY A DANCING QUEEN UR YOUNG AND SWEET. ONLY. *SMASHES OPEN MY WINDOW AT 12 MIDNIGHT* SEVENTEEEEEEEEEEEEEN

SO OH MY GOD. I AM CURRENTLY YELLING BECAUSE??????????? LIKE???????????????? YOU'RE SEVENTEEN??????? HOW DID WE EVEN COME TO THIS POINT ITS INSANE LIKE HOW THE FUCK ARE YOU SEVENTEEN WE'RE ALL JUST STILL TINY SMOLS WHERE ARE U GOING WHY ARE U GROWING OLDER STOP IT PLS ALRITE I DO NOT LIKE. MY PRECIOUS GOAT SUNSHINE WHO IS A PROFESSIONAL PAJAMA CONSULTANT A REAL SOLID BUSINESSWOMAN WHO DRIVES AND SHIT AND COULD PROBABLY RUN ME OVER AND IS 6'3 SO IF U WOULD SIT ON ME I WOULD MOST CERTAINLY DIE UR OFFICIALLY A DANCING QUEEN AND I AM CRYING

but in all seriousness I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU i am FOREVER AND EVER glad that i met u LIKE I FUCKIN HATE U GODMDAN FUCKIBG GOAT MAKING ME REBLOG THIGNS FUCK YUO FUCK O FF but like????? apart from that UR FUCKING BEYOND FABULOUS and i have decided to compile a list of reasons why u are unbelievably great and have earned ur title of being a dancing queen/brilliant goat/actual love of my life. bc u are excellent. AND IT MUST BE WRITTEN OUT HERE SOMEWHERE THAT I LOVE YOU. 

OK OK OK SO HERE WE GO BINCHES. PREPARE URSELF. THIS IS GONNA BE SUPER LENGTHY BECAUSE I LOVE YOU A LOT AND I AM GONNA DO A 'ON THE JELLICOE ROAD' WORTHY REVIEW OF U BUT LIKE A SHITTIER VERSION SO U BETTER FUNKIN BUCKLE UP BITCH

LEZGO:

IS OBVIOSULY FABULOUS

IS A REAL LIFE GIRAFFE 

WE ARE BLESSED TO HAVE ONE ROAM OUT OF CAPTIVITY LIKE............. WE ARE STRONGLY BLESSED

I CANNOT STRESS ENOUGH

CLAIMS TO HAVE 'barely any leg but a huge torso' and interpret this how u want bUT i just wanna say u r the most fucked up giraffe ever ok what the fuck WHO HURT YOU

apparently dis binch owns a bunny AND NEVER TOLD ME SHE DID

owns a problematic rabbit bc it pees everywhere

said problematic rabbit likes to pee everywhere so much its ridiculous it has no respect for the value of items of modern society and thus in my opinion should be sent to COURT

@ rabbit U NASTY OK PLS GET UR PRIORITIES SORTED???? THIS HAS BEEN A MOTHERFUCKING PSA THANK U (CAROLINE I AM TRUSTING YOU TO SHOW THIS ON UR PHONE TO THE GODDAMN BUNNY I NEED IT TO KNOW)

is 100% excellent at looking after drunk people ALRITE literally THIS WOMAN IS A SAINT who has saved REAL LIVES tbh where would that poor child from your old intermediate be if u hadn't SAVED HIS ENTIRE LIFE from all that tequila he would DEAD thats fuKCIN RIGHT U DESERVE ALL THE MEDALS A TRUE HERO AMONG NEW ZEALANDERS. A NATIONAL ICON. SO BRAVE I AM SO PROUD I LOVE YOU ALWAYS

AND ALSO PULLING DRUNK MAKING OUT PEOPLE OFF EACH OTHER I JUST WANT U TO KNOW THAT UR EFFORTS ARE SO VERY RECOGNIZED BECAUSE ONE TIME I DID THAT AND I GOT PUNCHED IN THE THROAT I THOUGHT I DIED BECAUSE I SAW JESUS BUT IT WASNT ACTUALLY JESUS IT WAS JUST A POSTER TAPED TO A FRIDGE I WAS SCAMMED

her own mum has called the police on her and was 100% ready for some quality fun family jailtime

ALSO ONE TIME GOATY ACCIDENTALLY FUCKED UP SOMEONES REAR MIRROR AND THE VICTIMS OF THE INCIDENT DID NOT GIVE HALF A FUCK HOWEVER, HER MOTHER GOATY REPORTED SEVERAL FUCKS TO THE POLICE AND FILED AN ACCIDENT REPORT AND THAT WAS THE DAY MY GOATY BECAME A DARK CRIMINAL

*OMINOUS MUSIC*

I AM STILL WAITING FOR THE DAY I WALK MY BUTT INTO COURT AGAINST UR MUM COVERED HEAD TO ASS IN $3 PLASTIC BRACELETS BACKED BY UR UNEXPECTEDLY KLEPTOMANIAC SISTER AND A BASKET OF STOLEN WOMANS DAYS AND ALONG WITH BLING BLING JIMMY WE WILL RESTORE THE RIGHTEOUSNESS AND LACK OF CONSCIENCE ON THIS LOVELY EARTH

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ENOUGHT ABOUT UR MUM LIKE ACTUALLY ALL UR FAMILY MEMBERS ARE DIFFERENT LEVELS OF WILD AND..... I AM AFRAID

OK OK IT MUST BE SAID CAROLINE HAS THE MOST AMAIZNG VOICE ????? EVER

like i love her voice sm SO FUCKING MUCH I TELL U i have never heard anything like it and i want caroline to like read me books for hours AND HOURS AND NARRATE MY WHOLE ENTIRE LIFE because i love how unusually deep and shadowy her voice sounds like deep flowing river water or smth like i LOVE IT SO MUCH it. Is.So. Strange BUT I LOVE IT IT IS THE COOLEST GODDAMN THING THROW A BUCKET AT ME I LOVE YOU

HAS A VIDEO OF HERSELF DOING THE ICE BUCKET CHALLENGE AND I KNOW I HAVE PRAISED IT FOR TWO YEARS IN A ROW ALREADY LIKE @ ME PLZ CHILL BUT i will not i will NEVER it is solid entertainment a+++ QUALITY I AM LAUGHIGN IM LAUGHING I AM LAUGHING FOREVER those beautiful hops of pain across ur backyard ARE THE LAST THINGS I WANT TO SEE BEFORE GOD TAKES ME FROM THIS EARTH

WRONGFULLY FRAMED ME FOR HAVING SHIT DICK TENDENCIES AND THEN YELLED AT ME AND CALLED ME A GARAGE WHAT A BINCH I AM IN LOVE

loves yellow flowers AND ALL THE FLOWERS AND HEAVY ROSES AND IS A FULL OUT FLOWER HOE

IS DESPICABLE TEEN WOLF GARBAGE LIKE.... ive been scrolling through our fanmails AND MY HEART HUR T S G O A T Y hOld mE we were sO Y O U N  G and like no lie i shit u not 80% oF THE FUCKING MESSAGES ARE U YELLING 'STYDIA IS GONNA HAPPEN THIS SEASON' AND 'OH MY GOD DID U SEE THAT STYDIA SCENE' AND DECLARATIONS OF LOVE FOR LYDIA MARTIN AND THE OTHER 20% IS U ASKIN ME IF IVE SEEN THE NEW TEEN WOLF I LOVE IT I LOVE YOU I AM SORRY TEEN WOLF KEEPS DISAPPOINTING US BOTH BUT STDYIA IS. DEFINIETELY. GONNA. HAPPEN. THIS. SEASON. IT HAS TO OR I WILL FUKIN FITE ALRIGHT GIVE US STYDIA OR GIVE US DEATH I LOVE UR TEEN WOLF LOVIBG ASS

anyway caroline is an utterly excellent person

if u were an ncea paper i would grade u with excellence

*FINGER GUNS*

like ?????deals with my stupid yelling ALL THE TIME

whenever i had a problem and went to my goaty she was so very understanding and patient AND DID NOT CALL ME A DUMBASS WHEN I DESERVED TO BE DECKED

TOLD ME THE TRU DEFINTION OF THE PHRASE 'SHOT'

TWO YEARS OF UTTER CONFUSION. ERASED FROM MY LIFE. PERMANENTLY.

MY SKIN?? CLEARED . MY FUTURE BILLS ??? PAID MY HUSBAND MARRIED MY STATUE FOR CAROLINE FULLY ERECTED

ok but like i can never say this enough goaty IS SO NICE TO TALK TO PLETAHE TALK TO ME FORVER SHE IS FABULOUS??? it blows my mind constantly that someone this incredible and special walks along this earth NONE OF US DESERVE THE GOAT

also ???? WHAT IN THE FUCK HOW HAVE I NOT MENTIONED THIS YET CAROLINE IS THE BEST WRITER I HAVE EVER SEEN IN MY LIFE SHE IS SO TALENTED EVERY TIME I READ ONE OF HER FICS I END UP THINKING ABOUT IT AFTERWARDS FOR 958495894 YEARS ALRIGHT THEY FUCK ME UP THEY WAY SHE HANDLES WORDS FUCKS ME UP HOW CAN YOUT TAKE FUCKING LETTERS AND THEN SHOVE THEM UP MY ASS LIKE THIS I AM NOT ALRIGHT I AM NOT ALRIGHT I AM NOT ALRIGHT I am Not Strong Enough For This

i am not even kidding ok THE WAY U HANDLE WORDS IS IN.FUCKING.CREDIBLE whenever u use them its like?? u turned them into something precious and all your writing have this feel to it like as if im holding a delicate bouqet of a thousand yellow flowers like im holding a butterfly in my hands like im holding a box of eggs and i am scared shitless to drop it bC MY DAD WILL PERSONALLY CRUCIFY ME

I AM AWFUL AT DESCRIPTIONS BUT I HOPE U SEE WHAT I MEAN. LIKE. IT IS SO *SCREAMS* MINBLOWING DECK ME WITH ALL UR WORDS EVER

I AM ONE HUNDRED FUCKING PERCENT NEVER OKAY WITH ANYTHING YOU WRITE IT HURTS SO GOOD AND I LOVE IT

ok ok this hoe right here has written THREE fics with a dedication for me at the beginning and like.............. ..... do u ever just cri

i have 'the glorious everywhere' printed out and FUCKING PINNED TO MY WALL WHERE I CAN SEE IT FROM ALL CORNERS OF MY ROOM ALWAYS back in my apartment in russia like it is legitimately the best thing. i love everything about this piece it should be adapted into a novel or a short film like PULL SOME FIFTY SHADES OF GREY SHIT W/ IT OK the imagery and REALNESS of this fic gets to me all the time and im crying im crying im crying I ABSOLUTELY ADORE IT PLS @ CAROLINE WHY ARE U SO TALENT

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT ALRIGHT LOOK AT THIS BULLSHIT FUCKIG I THINK ABOUT THIS FIC EVERY SINGLE DAY WHEN I WAKE UP FUCKING LOOK ' You see her hair dripping down her head and spinning out over the seats in the back and lighting them on fire. You see her pale skin and electric veins as she puts her hand out the window and tries to catch the sky and stuff it up her sleeve. You hear her voice, “Just drive James, you’ll know where we’re going when we get there.”  

REALLY I AM NOT FUCKIGN Okay CALL AN AMBULANCE CALL IT NOW I AM UNWELL I AM SICK I AM DYING FUK ME RITE UP

i am fully convinced this is the greatest thing thats ever been written.like. How. the. FUCK. tbh i want this paragraph ENTIRELY TATTOOED ON MY ASS I AM ZCRYING @ CAROLINE YOU HAVE THE MOST BEAUTIFUL BRAIN AND I AM SO VERY GLAD THAT IT EXISTS

i will not go into depth abt yelling about ur fics bc tbh i think u Know but I JUST WANNA SAY 'oh darling i have coloured blood (that i stole from you)' is the most iconic piece of literature to this day ever the and i zcri all the time because you are a goddamn bloody genius and you shine in colours beyond my comprehension and i love you so so so incredibly much

MY LOVE IS SO FUCKING TALENTED I AM YELLING I AM YELLING I AM YELLING

DOESN'T EAT FRIED SPERM

writes the BEST emails in history

UR SO LOVELY U GIVE ME SO MANY BEAUTIFUL SPELLING ERRORS FOR ME TO WHOLEHEARTEDLY ENJOY I AM GIGGLING *GIGGLES* IT BRINGS ME SO MUCH JOY WHEN U FUCK THINGS UP

tbh it is how fried chair came to life like it was actually in one of your first fanmails to me u said that two years ago and to this day it remains the Most Iconic Thing Ever

STRONG SUPPORTER OF WEETBIX

LOVES WEETBIX

FOUGHT TIGERS AND LIONS FOR HER FAMILY AND WAS SAVED BY WEETBIX AND WEETBIX ALONE 

ACTUALLY HAD A THING CALLED ‘WEETBIX DISCOURSE’ ON HER BLOG LIKE IT WAS ACTUALLY A THING THAT HAPPENED A REAL THING THAT OCCURED AND WAS PASSIONATELY ARGUED ABOUT AND I HAVE SEEN THINGS THAT CANNOT BE UNSEEN

RIGHTFULLY SO BC WEETBIX >>>>> JONAH GRIGGS I AM SORRY IT IS THE RULES

FUCK THE H8RS

like ??? is hilarious af QUEEN OF HUMOUR AND MAKING ME SNORT MY GODDAMN CHOCLATE MILK LIKE CAN U NOT BE SO EXCEPTIONAL U HO HAVE SOME CONSIDERATION U LIL BITCH but YES a++ top notch QUALITY storytelling skills in both fic writing and tequila struggles I APPRECIATE IT TO DEATH

ok ok ok also the most beautiful person ever??? LIKE ???????????????? BITCH WHAT THE FUCK ??????????????????????????????????????????????? WHO ALLOWED U

THE MOST PERFECT HAIR. ur hair is like waves of a golden ocean cascading from ur hEAD AND IT IS SO MAGICALLY FITTING B/C U R AN ETHEREAL BEING AND THE FACT THAT U HAVE AN ENTIRE WILD SEA RAGING ON UR HEAD JUST PROVES TO ME THAT U ARE A GOD AMONG MORTALS. UR HAIR IS SO PRETTY OK OK OKAY FUCK ME UP. STRAIGHT UP GORGEOUS. SO SOFT TOO AND SO SHINY AND IT FITS U SO WELL I AM FOREVER SCREAMING

THE MOST ANGEL FACE. GOATYS FACE LOOKS LIKE GOD OR WHOEVER THE FUCK WAS RESPONSIBLE CARVED IT OUT OF ROSE PETALS AND MARBLE LIKE. IT. IS. TRULY. THE MOST GORGEOUS THING ur face is softer than clouds tbh AND UR SMILE SAVES MY LIFE ITS BRIGHTER THAN THE ENTIRE UNIVERSE CONDENSED AND SOMETIMES WHEN I SEE UR SELFIES I HAVE TO GO GET LASER EYE SURGERY BECAUSE I HAVE BEEN B L I N D E D

U R SO UNCONSIDERATE TO MY FRAGILE HEALTH HOW DARE YOU

SO. GODDAMN GORGEOUS SLAY MY ENTIRE LIFE I BEG U ID PAY U TO SIT ON ME WITH UR HUGE BONES AND SLOWLY CRUSH ME INTO AN ENDLESS DEATH I HAVE $4 LEFT OVER FROM MY LIFE SAVINGS DO IT BAE

has the best taste in music omg WHAT A BLESSING WE LIKE THE SAME SONGS AND IT ACTUALLY KIND OF SCARES ME B/C IT FEELS LIKE WE ARE THE SAME PERSON AND THIS DOES NOT HELP MY CONSTANT STATE OF EXISTENTIAL CRISIS

HAS THE BEST TASTE IN BOOKS and adores skam as much as i do AND LOVES CHRIS/EVA AS MUCH AS IDO AND WROTE A FIC FOR THEM AND THE SNIPPET FROM IT ????? MY SOUL. GONE.

so tol and will never stop accusing me of being smol but listen up aight. imma FUCK YOU UP. REAL GOOD. ONE DAY. WHEN I CAN AFFORD TO BUY A LADDER. UNTIL THEN SLEEP WITH ONE EYE OPEN BINCH BC I AM COMING TO GET U

and is also the smartiest smart to ever smart LOOK AT MY U GO WITH UR EXCELLENCE ENDORSEMENT when i buy that ladder I WILL CLIMB IT AND HOVER AROUND UR HEAD LOTS SO I CAN ABSORB UR POWERS AND ALSO BREATHE THE FRESH AIR UP THERE WHICH IS NOT AVAILABLE TO GROUNDED PEASANTS SUCH AS ME

AND IS THE BEST COOKIE THE LOVE OF MY LIFE LIKE IF THIS ISNT ENOUGH TO CONVINCE ANYONE THAT CAROLINE IS BEYOND EXCEPTIONAL FOR OUR GALAXY THEN THEY CAN FUCK OFF PLS OK

like honestly,,, MY LOVE I COULD GO ON FOR YEARS AND YEARS AND CENTURIES UNTIL MY TEETH FALL OUT AND I GROW SENILE WITH MY LOVE BUT THE POINT OF THIS HOT STEAMING LAME MESS IS THAT I LOVE YOU TO BLOODY PIECES UR SO F U C K I N G INCREDIBLE I AM SO GLAD I MET YOU AND THAT YOU TAlk TO ME AND WE EMAIL EACH OTHER AND I AM BLESSED THAT YOU EVEN THINK OF ME AND THAT FREID CHAIR LOVES ME AND THAT U R MY GOAT BC UR MY ONLY GOAT AND UR THE BEST ONE THERE IS NO SHADE @ ALL OTHER GOATS BUT LIKE. IM SORRY I CANNOT TELL A LIE

IT IS THE COLD HARD TRUTH. 

and like??? i did a /search/deadgwen ON @jiilys BC I WANTED TO LOOK AT ALL OUR OLD STUFFS FROM 2015 and I Regret it I Regret it So Much theres a selfie from like when i was 14 and an idiot still on Ur blog and I look like an actual tragedy I Want to Die  we have known each other for so long its RIDICULOUS UR STILL AS AMAZING AS U WERE BACK THEN AND I AM MORE OR LESS CURED OF MY CONDITION OF BEING AN EMBARASSING DIPSHIT AND ITS CRAZY HOW MUCH YOUNGER WE WERE THEN LIKE UM WTF BUT UR STILL AS BEAUTIFUL AND 9384930X TIMES MORE AND I STILL LOVE U BC UR PERFECT AS EVER AND THAT IS WHAT MATTERS

NOW. I WAS GONNA MAKE YOU A PRESENT LIKE I REALLY DID BAE I TRIED SO MUCH SHIT ITS HORRIBLE BC LIKE ??? I WANTED TO MAKE YOU A PRESENTATION ON UR GOAT SUPERIORTY LIKE I DID LAST YEAR EXCEPT Like i am a fucking asshole™(COPYRIGHT JONAH GRIGGS THE MAN TEH MYTH THE LEGEND) who cannot do shit FOR SHIT it turned out so Awful and i cANNOT GRAPHIC BABE I TRIED TO MAKE YOU THIS EDIT AND THEN I REALIZED IT WAS Bad AND FOUGHT MYSELF FOR SIX HOURS AND I CANNOT WRITE AND YOU DESERVE ALL THE GIFTS EVER BUT I AM TRULY AWFUL

*ZCRIES*

I KNOW IM  LAME AND MY ONLY TALENT IS YELLING FOR HOURS ON END I WISH I COULD HAVE MADE YOU SOMETHING REALLY COOL BC ITS UR SEVENTEETH AND 17 IS THE BEST NUMBER AND UR LOVELY AND I LOVE YOU SO PLEASE FORGIVE ME BAE FOR BEING AN ACTUAL GARAGE ASSHOLE (COPYRIGHT JONAH GRIGGS THE EXPERIENCE) SHIT DICK 100% TERRIBLE DICKFLUTE OKAY I LOVE YOU AND I CAN NEVER IMAGINE WHAT I WOULD BE WITHOUT YOU IN MY LIFE AND I HOPE YOU HAVE A REALLY REALLY REALLY GOOD YEAR LIKE FUCK SHIT UP BAE UR GONNA BE IN YEAR 13 ITS ALL GONNA BE SO AWFUL AND WE WILL ALL DIE aND WERE SO O L D JESUS CHRIST IF HEART ATTACKS DONT TAKE US OUT NCEA LEVEL 3 WILL BUT I HOPE THIS WILL BE A SUPER GOOD YEAR FOR U IN REGARDS OF EVERYTHING BECAUSE U DESERVE IT U DESERVE IT U DESERVE IT I HOPE THINGS WILL LEAD UP TO U GETTING THAT APARTMENT IN NEW YORK AND ALL THE HIGH HEELS THAT U WILL WEAR AND ALL THE YELLOW FLOWERS THAT U WILL BUY AND UR CAREER AS A LIFECHANGING LITERARY GENIUS OK OK I LOVE YOU HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABE

ok ok ok but. 

ONE MORE THING.

LISTEN.

THE FUCKING

*CLECNHES JAW*

REBLOG FIASCO

*FLINGS MY ASS INTO THE SUN*

WHEN IT IS GOOD AND DAYLIGHT. U HAVE UNTIL THEN. LIKE I KNOW THIS IS UR BIRTHDAY WISH AND I LOVE YOU BUT FUCK OFF HWO COULD YOU DO THIS TO ME I FUCKING TRUSTED YOU I FUCKING FUCK JUST FUCK YOU FUCKING DICK i will RIOT 

OKAY BABE ITS MIDNIGHT AND ILL BE UP IN ABOUT SIX HOURS AND LIKE. ANYTHING. ANYTHING ELSE FOR UR BIRTHDAY WISH OK BABE IM GONNA FUCKING DIE THIS IS IT THIS THE END I WILL GO DOWN SWEARING PROFUSELY WITH A HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE AND U WILL BE WATCHING AND LAUGHI G ANF @OFFICALTALL FUCK YU FUCKDUCKUD CUDCKUD DNUSJNDJF FUCK U @GOATY FUCK. UFCN WHERE IS UR HOOF WHY ARE U NOT FEELIN THE TEMPERATURE ITS EBOLA ITS GOATBOLA I WONT MAKE IT UNTIL DAWN I WONT SEE THE SUNLIGHT GOATY I CANT *FAKE CRYING SOUNDS* I WILL DIE. IT WILL HAPPEN. AND I WANT IT TO BE KNOWN THAT U ARE THE BITCH THAT KILLED ME. *MORE FAKE ZCRYING SOUNDS* I MUST SEND MESSAGES TO ALL MY DEAREST KIND FRIENDS WHO HAVE NEVER FUCKED ME LIKE THIS ALRIGHT *FAKE COUGHING* TELL THEM THAT I *MORE FAKE COUGHOGN* LOVE THEM *THROWS KETCHUP PACKET EVERYWHERE WHILE UR NOT LOOKING AND BUSY BEING WORRIED ABOUT MY HEALTH* AND I WILL REMEMBER THEM EVEN IN DEATH

ANYWAY HERE IS MY WILL:

WHAT U GET:

nothing

u get nothing

bINCH

zero. zip. nada

0 potato 4 u

U CAN HAVE THE SALT FROM MY KITCHEN SO U WILL BE PERPETUALLY REMINDED OF MY LAST EMOTIONS TOWARDS THIS LIFE

maybe like the one half a potato that was randomly in my drIVEWAY THAT ONE TIME 

M A Y B E

WHAT GOOD KIND LOVING FRIENDS, SUCH AS MILS AND FRIED CHAIR AND ELLIE AND OTHER ASSORTED PEOPLES WHICH I SHALL ADDRESS IN CLAUSE 4.20 OF THE TERMS AND CONDITIONS OF MY WILL, GET:

actually mils is a hoe and can choke but u r the evil here rn aND FOR THE PURPOSES OF THIS ARGUMENT WE WILL PRETEND THAT I LIKE MILS

ANYWAY. REALLY GOOD THINGS I OWN

I HAVE SOME SOCKS I DONT WANT U GUYS CAN HAVE THEM

AND LIKE

MY DUVET

SEE GOATY THESE ARE THE KIND OF HEART TOUCHING POST DEATH GIFTS U MISS OUT ON WHEN U MURDER ME IN COLD BLOOD

ALSO NO TOUCHING MY MANGOES THAT I BOUGHT TWO DAYS AGO BECAUSE I STILL WANT TO EAT THEM AND IF ANYONE EVEN BREATHES IN THEIR GENERAL DIRECTION I WILL BEAT THEM UNCONSCIOUS WITH A TELEPHONE THIS IS A T H R E A T

I HOPE UR TAKING NOTES AND I HOPE U FEEL GOOD ABOUT BEING A 6′3 KILLER BECAUSE UR AN ASSHOLE ™LIKE UR ASSHOLIER™ THAN THE REAL ASSHOLE THAT IS JONAH GRIGGS™ THE LABEL™ (COPYRIGHT JONAH GRIGGS™ THE ANT MURDERING HOT PIECE OF ASS™) BUT I WILL DIE FOR U MY GOAT *strokes ur pretty face* BC IT IS UR BIRTHDAY WISH FOR ME TO SUFFER AND I LOVE YOU AND I WOULD DO ANYTHING FOR U THEREFORE . DESPITE THIS SICKNESS *FLAILS* I. WILL. BE. BRAVE. I WILL REBLOG THOSE TWENTY POSTS I WILL FLATLINE BY THE THIRD POST AND MY BLOOD WILL BE ON UR HANDS *CAREFULLY ARRANGES MY STUNT GOAT IN POSITION* AND I WILL BE YELLING CURSES AT YOU IN THE TAGS BUT I WILL DIE IN THE NAME OF HONOUR I WILL GO DOWN AS A GOAT NEVER HAS BEFORE 

BUT LIKE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE YOU AND I I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE YOU AND I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU I LOVE YOU SO SO SO SO SO SO SO MUCH YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC I AM SO HAPPY U EXIST. HAVE THE BOMBEST ASS 17TH BIRTHDAY BABE I HOPE UR PARTY IS LIT AND HAVE FUN GETTING DRUNK AND HAVING ALL THE BANTS AND LAFFS AND ALSO I WILL SEND U THE AWAITED EMAIL IN A FEW HOURS WHEN MY INTERENT IS BACK ON  BECAUSE IT IS A CONTINUATION OF THIS BULLSHIT WITH SOME STRUCTURED DISCUSSION AKA WHAT THE FUCK DO U HAVE AGAINST SMIRNOFF ICE how is it not HARDCORE enough for u IT IS LITERALLY FLAVOURED VODKA DOES IT NOT KNOCK OUT UR 6′3 ASS OR WHAT EXCUSE ME 

ANYWAY IN CONCLUSION.

HAPPY. SEVENTEENTH. BIRTHDAY. MY. CHUM.

*BLOWS U A KISS*

*PUTS ON TWO FÜR COATS TO REMAIN UNDETECTED* 

*STEALS ALL UR WEETBIX AND RUNS AWAY TO ALASKA NEVER TO BE SEEN AGAIN*

*still replies ur emails tho cuz i love u bitch y u do dis to me*