#serious talk to if it makes you miserable. Unfollow it Is free and you can always change your mind

[demonstars]

I can’t stand following people on twitter when all they do is complain about any and everything it’s so disheartening and it really sucks when it’s someone who’s art you love

Like there are a lot of fanartists I think make really cool art but I can’t stand to follow them bc they are always complaining

you're so me. This is why I trust dreamfanartacc and my beautiful mutuals to put the pretty art on my tl and ignore everything else

[growandrecover]

hey… this is kinda weird cuz iam not used to writing a stranger and telling them about stuff that feels so personal as an 3d but I need help in some way. So my story: I started restricting a couple years ago, it went downhill pretty fast and I was hospitalised soon. I then spend almost a year recovering in clinics. I got back home, everything went quite well (just some up and downs but nothing serious) until about a month ago… I am starting to feel worse again. Following triggering accounts (it seems like an addiction), foodnoise, guilt… u name it. There is still this spark of hope and this part of me that wants recovery but I feel like I suck at both, the 3d and recovery… thank u for listening

Hi, anon. I'm so sorry you're going through this. I've been there too.

I know the feeling of wanting to engage in ed behavior but also being miserable and wanting to escape it. I know you're not going to want to do this, but from an outsider's perspective, I think you need to tell someone. Based on the fact that you've been hospitalized (sounds like at least once?), I'm assuming you have a therapist or help of some kind? Or at least still have their contact information? If so, I would strongly advise you to reach out to them. If you're still in contact, and see them on a regular basis, they need to be made aware of this asap.

I know, I know. You don't want to give up the ed, the rules, the "body", or whatever it may be. Been there, done that. But as someone who has done this NUMEROUS times, I'm going to tell you what I wish someone would have told me: You might be scared, and that's okay. You want to keep the ed and the body you think/know it'll give you. That's valid. But you also want to be free of it. That's valid too. But as we both know, the ed only ever hurts us. I know it feels good in a roundabout way, and you may feel like you're in control, but you're not.

If you're unable to seek professional help, I'd unfollow those accounts. There really is something sickly satisfying about them, and I think that's part of what draws us in. But if you can just get them out of your feed, that could help with the thoughts. When I feel like I'm on the verge of a relapse, I have this one model I always look to for a trigger, and I go and search for her pictures. But getting her photos out of my phone completely (even on Pinterest, Tumblr, TikTok, Youtube, all of it) always helps get my mind out of that space. Seeing it just makes it worse.

I know that Tumblr is the home of ed content, and Twitter is getting there too. If you have to, delete the app off your phone. Just get rid of the temptation.

If you need accounts to scroll through, try looking through recovery accounts. You may not be able to follow their advice right now, but at least seeing that mindset could be beneficial.

I apologize that this is so short, but I think the most beneficial thing for you would be to get professional help if you can. I'd hate for you to relapse. (I'm not shaming you if you do!! I'm just saying that I know that feeling, and I hate that other people feel it as well)

If you need someone to talk to, I'm always here for you, anon. You can do this <3

[choupichoups]

Press F (Instagram/College AU) 

Lucas swears he’s the absolute master of undetected stalking. Or: Eliott is instagram famous and Lucas is the disaster gay who accidentally likes his post. 

He smiles down at the screen, scrolling through the hilarious comments on the post. The exaggerated marriage proposals are probably his favourite because, honestly, same but he’d never be caught dead saying shit like that. Even as a joke.

Maybe.

Lucas sinks deeper into the couch, dimming the brightness on his phone screen just in case Yann happens to look over at some point. It’s not like Yann doesn’t know what he’s up to most of the time, but he’d still like to save himself from some of the teasing, thank you very much.

“Did you see that?” Yann yells at no one in particular, fully engrossed in the game they’re playing. Or they had been playing, since Lucas died in the game a good few minutes ago. He’s got better things to do anyway— like check the guy’s profile for any new updates he might have missed. Lucas isn’t exactly on top of his game when it comes to keeping up with Instagram but ever since his great discovery, he’s spent more time scrolling through the app in more recent times that his entire high school years combined.

“I’m doing another round of this before we switch up the game, okay?” Yann murmurs, already pressing the buttons before Lucas even replies. The latter shrugs, doesn’t care whether he gets to play for the next while. He’s much too preoccupied staring at the new photo he’s been graced with.

The dude, the myth, the legend. Eliott Demaury.

Lucas found out about him nearly two months ago— or more accurately, he found Eliott’s short film, Polaris, while scrolling through Youtube one dull Friday night. He’d watched the entire thing at three o’clock in the morning and promptly obsessed over it for the next couple of hours. Finding the director’s Instagram and seeing a puzzle posted on it hadn’t doused his interest either. If anything, that just made it worse. His last two braincells had worked in overdrive trying to rewatch the film and solve the puzzle at the same time.

Needless to say, he’d managed to find Eliott’s personal account in the end but the feeling of accomplishment only lasted until he saw that quite a lot of people had also found it. Mr. Demaury, has, in fact, half a million followers on his Instagram and Lucas could have probably found it easily if he’d just googled it instead of driving himself nuts figuring out what the riddle meant.

“Man, this is too hard.” Yann groans from beside him and Lucas can only assume he’s lost another round. He offers a vague noise of sympathy for his friend. “Are you really doing this right now?”

“Hm?”

“You’re really out here stalking your man during our we time?”

Lucas drags his gaze off of Eliott’s majestic photo so Yann can get a full view of his frown. “Our what now?”

“This is our time, Lucas. Best friend bonding time. 22h to 24h, it’s on the contract.”

He starts laughing, can’t help it when faced with the truly affronted expression all over Yann’s face. “What contract?”

“You signed it when you were like two years old.”

“Uh huh.” Now certain that Yann’s just talking nonsense, Lucas returns his attention back on his phone. “Legit age to be signing contracts.”

Yann doesn’t say anything but he steals Lucas’ phone from his grip and holds it out of reach when Lucas scrambles to get it back. “You don’t even follow him, what the hell?”

“That doesn’t matter, give it back!”

“So what, you just search up his profile all the time?”

“What about it?”

“That’s so sad, Lucas.”

“Shut up,” he says, snatching his phone back once it’s finally in his reach. “Imane knows this guy, I won’t hear the end of it if they get even a little hint that I’m looking at— Yann!” he screeches, shaking Yann’s shoulder with one hand while his other holds the phone up to his face.

The horror in his voice must be evident because Yann immediately straightens up, dragging Lucas close so he can take a look at the screen as well. “What?”

“Oh no… oh no no no.”

“Oh shit.”

“What do I do?!” Lucas waves his phone at Yann, almost decking him on the nose in the process. Yann stills him, shaking his head at the bright red heart below Eliott’s post. “Do you think I should unlike it? I can still do that right? He won’t see the notification, he gets a lot anyway.”

“No, man, that just makes it weird.”

“But…”

“You have to follow him.”

Lucas gives him a withering look. “Are you serious right now?”

“It’s natural! You like the post, okay, chill, next you follow. He gets lots of notifications, as you said. By the time he checks back, 200 other people would have followed him too. Wait a couple more days then unfollow and unlike.” Yann rubs at his back, sounding so sure of himself. “Then you can go back to your sad stalking ways after that.”

He shoves at Yann with a scowl, making sure to kick at his friend’s limbs as he slides off from where he’d basically crawled into the other’s lap in a desperate bid to retrieve his phone. And look where all that effort has gotten him.

“You sure that’s not weird?”

Yann throws a pillow at his face. “I already said it’s natural. Honestly if somebody did that to me I wouldn’t think anything weird of it.”

“Okay.”

Lucas hits the follow button, closes out of the app, and shoves his phone under the cushions. Whatever happens next is a problem for tomorrow.

He doesn’t go back on Instagram until well into Tuesday evening, choosing instead to finish all of his homework and maybe do a little bit of reading ahead of time for his biology class. It’s a wonder how much one is capable of getting done while avoiding the thing they usually obsess over.

But he’s only human. So letting go of all the self control he’s managed to conjure up the entire morning, he pulls up the app and slowly scrolls through the new content. He doesn’t know why he’s dreading this so much anyway— literally nothing is probably going to happen. Eliott won’t even notice the new addition to his massive following and Lucas would be able to see his posts without having to search up his username all the goddamn time. It’s a win-win.

Lucas doesn’t curb the smile pulling at the corners of his lips, even though a small part of him is a little disappointed. Not that he’s expecting anything to come out of this ridiculous infatuation anyway but knowing what Polaris is paired with that caption, the post sounds increasingly more romantic the longer he thinks about it.

So Eliott’s taken already. That’s cool. Great. But this is nice, at least, Eliott’s posts being readily accessible for him like this. Maybe he shouldn’t have made a big deal about following the guy in the first place. Only Imane seems to know both Eliott and Lucas anyway and she’s not the type to unnecessarily pry into other people’s business. 

He still doesn’t hit like on the post though. He has to be subtle about this, he’ll wait a couple more posts to go before liking another one. Lucas is extra careful to avoid double tapping the screen when he goes back to his feed, no longer holding his breath for a catastrophe as he mindlessly goes through other new posts and notifications. 

Which explains why he’s entirely too unprepared for what happens next.

srodulv started following you.

He clutches at his phone with both hands, forcibly shoving down the urge to scream and throw his phone out the window. He’s ill-equipped to deal with this. It’s not supposed to happen; Eliott shouldn’t have noticed him and Lucas should be free to get on with his life without knowing that some god in human form has probably seen the dumb photos he posts with him and the gang and— oh god, what did he post during that party last week again? It doesn’t look too stupid does it?

Lucas frantically skims through his own profile, wanting to shrivel up and die for every post he finds way too embarrassing to be seen by the guy. 

The apartment door creaks open and Lucas throws himself off his bed, running out to the living room and most likely startling Yann out of his mind but that doesn’t matter right now.

“Yann!” he yells out, reminiscent of the panicked tone he’d used the night before.

“Huh?” Yann turns around, dropping his bag on the floor as he slips out of his shoes.

Lucas stands in front of him, holding out the phone over his head like it’s Simba. “He noticed me,” he whispers as if there’s a chance that anyone else would hear them.

“Who?” Yann looks from Lucas’ wide eyes to the phone in his hand. The screen is eye level for Yann so he merely peeks up to see what all the fuss is about. “Oh.”

And then Yann starts laughing. Lucas, personally, doesn’t find anything amusing in this situation.

“Can you stop that? I’m so stressed out right now,” he huffs, bringing the phone back down to his chest so he can stare some more at the notification that changed his life.

“Sorry, you gotta admit it’s a little funny.”

It’s not, but okay. Lucas continues frowning down at the screen, wondering if it would be too weird to mass delete half of his old posts.

Yann takes his phone away before he does anything stupid.

“You said he won’t even realize,” Lucas mumbles miserably, mind flashing back to that one stupid meme he’d posted about three weeks ago. God, Eliott’s going to unfollow in the next ten minutes.

“I’m not right about everything. Anyway, isn’t this a good thing? The guy only follows like 20 people and you’re one of them.”

Wait, what?

He reaches up, tilts his own phone in Yann’s hand so he can confirm that with his own eyes.

And okay, maybe that makes him feel a little giddy inside. Deep down. Just a little.

“Congrats, man. Not everyone gets noticed by their crush.” 

“I don’t have a crush.”

“Sure.”

“Shut up.” 

His phone beeps with another notification and they both look down at it simultaneously, like birds honing in on loose bread. It’s almost comical the way they gasp in unison when the notifications start popping up. From instagram user srodulv. Eliott. Eliott’s straight up just… liking a lot of his posts. Embarrassing memes included. 

Yann opens his mouth to say something but Lucas grabs the phone out of his grip and runs back into his room, shutting the door so he can freak out in peace.