#semi pro jew impersonator
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jiskblr · 2 years ago
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It does look like a shofar though, at least based on a quick google
Only in the sense that it's made out of a horn. Which, you know, most instruments of that type historically would be. That's why we call them 'horns'.
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Shofars are twistier than this, though a single curve is, I believe, entirely permissible if that's what you can get. They're supposed to be ram's horns, which are twisty unless they are quite short, at least on the common species; this is not that short. It's not made to be held the same way I see actual shofars being held in photos and drawings, this looks like it would be held more like a clarinet (though obviously the mouthpiece is more brass/horn-style). It looks like it has decoration or finger-pieces along the upper part and not around the mouth; this is the opposite of what I see on shofars which are decorated. (It would also be somewhat difficult on a real-horn horn, but one of the few non-Jewish-stereotype traits goblins are established to have is to be excellent crafters, so I don't think that counts against it.)
Ah, Wikipedia has a summary of the criteria for picking a shofar:
The Elef Hamagen (586:5) delineates the order of preference: 1) curved ram; 2) curved other sheep; 3) curved other animal; 4) straight—ram or otherwise; 5) non-kosher animal; 6) cow
Of which only the sixth is forbidden. If you can find anything curved from a kosher 'donor', you should do so. So a short one would look like
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And a longer one would preferably look like
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I believe something with the shape of the former thing but much longer would be a perfectly cromulent shofar and qualify as 'curved', but I can't find any examples; they all either are clearly short from context or lack anything to clearly scale them by but appear short from the size of the mouthpiece.
Compare to other horn instruments made of horn:
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Or made of wood (I believe):
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I think we can pretty confidently say that the image above doesn't look more like shofars than it looks like these.
Now, despite appearances (and a long history of accidentally learning things, via books or from people, that would make me substantially better at passing), I am not, in fact, Jewish, and have never attended Rosh Hashanah services or any other time a shofar was blown. (Weddings? Probably some other times?) So I could be missing something. But I think I have enough evidence here to say no, BS, this does not, actually, look like a shofar more than any randomly-selected 17th-century non-metal horn would. (Apparently making horns from brass was already overwhelmingly popular by the 1600s; the main remaining horn made from an animal was an elephant-tusk oliphaunt, which was a royal status symbol. TIL.)
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jiskblr · 2 years ago
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Formally converting requires a rabbi, but following the rules while you are on the path is encouraged. Except that ideally you should also break them at least once a week to be clear that you’re aware you’re not done converting yet.
Dumbest fearmongering about hate groups I’ve seen in my life afaicr: panic at the thought Nazis might be eating kosher in prison
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Bitch who gives a fuck why should anyone care if racists are eating latkes. What fucking political interests are you serving that are actively hindered by fascists pretending to not eat pork
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Lmfaoooooooo eat shit you nimby cretins
They’re pissy about the RLUIPA bc it infringes more than zero ever on their precious suburbs by guaranteeing religious land use rights. Seethe you fucking lawn worshiping losers. Lie about yr religious dietary needs in jail to piss off the rent-seekers
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jiskblr · 8 years ago
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Next Year
“Have you ever been on a Reclaimer hab at Passover?”
“The Jewish holiday? Don’t think so.”
“Try it next year, it’s worthwhile. Best I can tell, every Reclaimer who doesn’t see it as blasphemous goes to one.”
“Why bother? They’re aping a religion they aren’t even part of, do they even understand any of it?”
“Maybe not as originally intended. But the Ten Plagues of Egypt and the exodus are about the best metaphor for the Fall you could imagine. And I maintain that the end of the Reclaimer seder is more traditional than any Earth Jews ever managed.”
“How?”
“You don’t understand Reclaimers until you’ve heard them shout, in unison: Next year in Jerusalem!”
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jiskblr · 6 years ago
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A Tradition I Really Hope Exists
As you have already probably heard, it is traditional in Jewish culture to, when you refer to the dead, add “may (his/her/their) memory be a blessing”. For example: “Eleanor Roosevelt, may her memory be a blessing, was the first Secretary-General of the UN.”
I hope, but do not know, that a derived tradition exists. Where, rather than adding it to the names of the respected dead, you attach it to the names of the despised living. For example: “Donald Trump and Benjamin Netanyahu, may their memory be a blessing, moved the American embassy to Jerusalem today.” Or, since my impression is that most observant Jews are also, heavily and usually rabidly, pro-Israel, “Jimmy Carter, may his memory be a blessing, has supported a very Christian charity since he left office.” (He engineered the Camp David Accords, which did not give Israel 100% of what it wanted and are therefore Evil Incarnate.)
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