#selene x rolan

[theshotsheardacrossworlds]

Coward

Selene reunites with Rolan at Last Light and then saves him a few more times. SFW.

It was bad enough that the Shadow Curse was worse than anything she could have imagined, but Selene was not prepared for just how badly her reunion with Rolan would go.

Drunken yelling.

He hates me.

He hates me…

That first night at Last Light she cried herself to sleep, tail wrapped around a leg. It reminded her of when his tail curled around her calf at the celebration.

And then he kissed me---clearly very nervous. Gods, how I wanted him to touch me…

Now he never will because he hates me.

He hates me…

***

“The last winged horror…it’s by Rolan! At the bar!” Astarion yelled from outside Isobel’s room.

Rolan.

In danger.

Winged horror.

He hates me.

I love him.

ROLAN.

I’LL SAVE YOU.

With a snarl, Selene Longsong ran and leapt from the second floor of Last Light Inn and landed on her feet less than a foot away from the monster next to Rolan.

I’VE GOT YOU.

She screamed as the Everburn Blade struck a killing blow, her rage-inducted gaze meeting his.

“That’s it! That’s the last!”

Selene shook herself out of her rage and felt panic rising in her chest.

Oh shit.

This is the first time he’s seen me rage, and he hates me.

Great.

Fantastic.

For a second, she thought she saw something kind glimmer in his eyes.

But then he opened his mouth.

“We won’t even have to go out into the shadows to die now that the cultists have found us.” He sneered, tankard back in hand.

For fuck’s sake, Rolan. “Nobody else is dying. I’ll deal with the cultists.”

He rolled his eyes. “I’m sure they’re cowering in their heavily fortified tower knowing you’re on the way.”

Turning to leave with Astarion, Gale, and Shadowheart, Selene muttered a barely audible, “You’ll see.”

I’ll save them all.

Then maybe…he won’t hate me anymore.

***

Selene nearly throttled Rolan after she and her party rescued him in the Shadow Cursed Lands.

How could he be so stupid?!

FUCKING WIZARDS, MAN!

After using Misty Step to reach him, Selene fired what turned out to be the killing shot at the shadow creature.

Rolan, however, was not pleased that once again I saved his life. Fucking hells. “Gods damn it all. I can do nothing right—not a damn thing.”

“You’re supposed to be at Last Light!”

“I’m supposed to be saving Cal and Lia! Instead, I found myself cornered by shadow-fiends and in need of rescue. From you, of all bloody people.”

What the fuck does that mean, Rolan?!

Without thinking, Selene snarled, “Should I have left you to die?”

“At least dead I’d have a purpose—perhaps as an appetizer for some cursed monster.” The wizard seemingly deflated in front of her, his shoulders slumping. “I’ve failed Cal and Lia, again. Be on your way—I’ll return to Last Light…I know when I’m outmatched.”

Gale offered to send a familiar to follow Rolan…to make sure he actually went back.

But he’s not going to do it again.

And he still hates me.

***

Selene was still stewing about him and possibly still hoping that maybe he doesn’t hate me when Lae’zel slid a letter under the flaps of her tent. Isobel gave me a room at Last Light, but I don’t go there until after everyone has turned in for the night.

“The stupid teef-ling wizard told me to give this letter to you. Why he does not simply say what he wants to say I do not know, but I do know this---by not facing you, he is a coward and thus, unworthy of you.” There was a long pause. Too long. “Goodnight.”

Well, that was weird.

She opened the letter and inhaled sharply.

My dear lady,

I am ashamed of myself.

I am ashamed of my treatment of you.

I am ashamed that I am too afraid to speak these words to you but say them I must.

I beg your forgiveness, Selene, for so many things. For my arrogance. For my drunkenness. For raising my voice to you. For being ungrateful to you time and time again.

I am so deeply ashamed and embarrassed.

I can understand, of course, if you do not wish to remain cordial with me but once again, there is something I must say.

I am in love with you.

I fell in love with you that first evening we spent together at the grove. I didn’t expect to find you on my walk that night, but I’m so glad I did. The joy of being by your side…feeling as if we’ve known each other our entire lives…the way my heart continues to flutter at the thought of your touch…it has overwhelmed my senses, warming my heart and soul.

If you don’t share these feelings, then I beg your forgiveness again. One word from you, and I won’t bring it up again. This I swear.

But forgive me, dearest Selene, I had to at least try, or I would regret it for the rest of my life.

Most sincerely and ardently,

Rolan

She blinked several times.

He doesn’t hate me!

HE LOVES ME!?!?!?!

With relief washing over her as she breathlessly laughed, Selene held the letter against her chest and cried.

***

She found Rolan a little while later (after I stopped crying and gathered a few things from my tent to bring back to Last Light), at the bar not surprisingly. Not wanting to startle him, she spoke softly as she approached.

“Rolan?”

If he heard her, he barely reacted. He continued to stare at the bottle of Arabellan Dry in front of him.

She placed the envelope containing his letter on the bar next to him. “Rolan, did you mean what you wrote? Because I—”

“Every word.”

Oh. My. Gods.

Breathe, Selene. Breathe.

Licking her lips, she whispered, “Can we talk in private?”

He nodded wordlessly and followed her upstairs.

Breathe.

Breathe.

BREATHE.

As soon as she closed the door behind her, she rushed to Rolan and hugged him tightly. “I love you too.” Even saying it, I can’t stop smiling. He makes me want to smile.

His hands settled on her soft hips, rubbing them gently. “Thank the gods! I thought perhaps I had ruined everything.” Relief painted his usually serious features, a genuine smile on his face. “But no. No, I haven’t, and I swear I’ll—”

Selene silenced him with a kiss that ended with her tugging on his lower lip. “Rolan, less talking more kissing.” PLEASE.

“Ha, yes. Of course, my dear. Of course. Yes.” He laughed breathlessly, his hands now traveling to her behind. “Yes…” He kissed her so sweetly but then he grabs my ass and squeezes. Good gods, I’m in love.

She brought her long arms around his neck and undid his hair tie, tossing it on the bedside table. He is so gorgeous. So gorgeous. He loves me?!?!? “Rolan, I…I thought you hated me.” Selene said softly, blinking back tears. “I meant what I said. I’ll bring Cal and Lia back. I promise. I promise.”

Rolan shook his head. His hands, still on her hips, squeezed gently. “No. I never…I’ve never hated you. Been incredibly frustrated by you, yes. Constantly!” He chuckled. “But no, I’ve never hated you. Never.” Oh fuck now we’re both crying. “I have faith in you, my love. I know you’ll bring them back. All of them.” One of his hands rose to stroke her cheek. “I’m sorry. I—”

“You’re good, love. Just don’t do it again.” Making that absolutely clear, saer. Leaning into his touch, she sighed happily. “Wanna lie down? It’s been a long day.”

“Right! Oh yes, of course. I, um, can leave you to it…” He sadly let go of her and stepped back, a hand rubbing the back of his neck.

You have got to be kidding me.

She giggled. “Rolan, I want to cuddle with you in bed!”

He blinked. “Oh. Yes. With me.”

Or not?

Her heart began to pound in her chest. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to. I just thought it would be nice.” I want to hold you and tell you everything is going to be okay. I’ll take care of you.

“Oh gods, please don’t misunderstand—I do want this. It’s just been a…um, a very long time.” He smiled ruefully, tugging on his collar. “Some years, in fact.”

Without thinking, she blurted out, “Well that’s okay because I’ve never done this!” Shit. “With a man. Or anyone really.” Stop. Talking. “Thought maybe there was wrong with me.” NO STOP TALKING. “Because it honestly felt like I was the only person who was unlovable, and—oh!”

Rolan rushed to her and silenced her with a passionate kiss, moaning in her mouth. “Woman, you are…so…frustrating…” And yet you love me anyways! Cupping her face, he smiled. “You’re the most beautiful, beguiling, enchanting, perfect person I’ve ever seen.” His smile grew wider as he kissed the tip of her nose. “Now, let’s get you in bed.” His eyes widened as she laughed. “Not like that! Not like that! You…you…”

Aww he’s so cute when he’s pissy.

“Me. Me. Me. Come on, handsome.” Selene grinned, tugging him to bed. Both quickly got down to their smalls, and Rolan insisted on being the big spoon because he’s actually quite sweet when he wants to be.

For the first time since her abduction, the barbarian slept peacefully in the arms of my favorite wizard.

Sorry Gale!