#seeing a lot of character development in there

[chornayadrakoshig]

I'm going to add another perspective as a person from a different side of fandom.

One of my navite languages is Russian so most of my time reading and posting fanfiction was spent on Ficbook. The thing is, unlike ao3, that site is monolingual (recently they tried expanding by creating separate sites for English, Spanish, and Portuguese I believe, but they aren't well known). And while there are a lot of native Russian speakers outside of Russia (like me), most of their user base is in Russia.

And the thing is... They are for profit site. They have ads (increasingly more and more over the years). They have "gift" system where you can pay real money to send someone a digital sticker (that back in the day was original illustration at least - now they are heavy on AI-generated shit), and the site gets all that money. They have paid features (e.g. free accounts can only download 10 fics per day and paid accounts can download 100). Some users suggested to move site to donation-based system (or another tier of paid accounts where you'll remove ads in exchange of donations without getting other paid features - ppl wanted to support the site but didn't want paid covers and promo and stats and shit). The site refused, saying that project won't survive on donations, it's not a realistic system (which might be true since they are for-profit and they have paid developers on stuff, but still). So, they kept relying on ad revenue and paid accounts.

And because of that they were trying to walk a thin line of "don't be banned by Russian government" for years. Technically, they moved their servers to EU long time ago (though as far as I know they still hire developers in Russia). But they rely on ads traffic and paid users and ban would mean they lose a big chunk of it simply because Russia is cracking down on vpns and there is some laws around putting ads on banned sites which cuts out actually relevant companies who could've advertise there and bring more clicks and more revenue.

After annexation of Crimea the site added a rule forbidding to write fanworks about "recent world tragedies and political conflicts" with a limit of "6 month after the situation stabilised". However many people noticed that the thing that actively gets blocked is anything pro-Ukrainian related to Russia-Ukraine war, for example a work where author supported Ukraine and urged russian ppl to protest in his author's notes, not in the body of work.

While they don't have it written in their rules, the site deleted multiple works with graphic depiction of suicide because Russian government bans anything beyond brief mention.

And in the recent years, when Russia introduced stricter laws about "gay propaganda", the site added rules about tagging: the category and all additional tags have to be correct, if you miss a warning or mods decide your off-hand mention of lesbian couple is too much for "mentions of f/f relationships" tag, your work can be forcefully edited or in most cases just deleted. No warning, no emailed copy. If you don't have a backup elsewhere, you're fucked.

At one point they considered creating "Slashbook" and basically moving all queer works off the main site into its own reservation, so in case they'll get a ban, it won't affect the main site. They even started accepting donations for that but soon quietly ditched the idea and started making an english fic site.

A year ago, when Russia decided to ban the site completely - for many repeated violations of "gay propaganda" laws they tried to resolve it... by soft-blocking queer works themselves, so a user located in Russia opening a fandom tag will see "this work is not available in your country" placeholder on anything with m/m, f/f ships, trans characters and some kinky tags. The placeholder was non-clickable, didn't have link to work or the author. The authors from the area would be able to post the work but most users won't see it. And some smaller russian fanfiction sites like fanfics.me of fanficus.com were able to get away with it - but Russia refused to unblock Ficbook and basically ignored them since. yay.

So. The site dependent on ads and profit will think about ads and profit first, their users second (if at all).

So, the other day, when I was discussing AO3's policy on solicitation, a tumblr user came at me saying that AO3's "no monetization/solicitation" rules were "bullshit" because nexus mods allows fan created mods to get paid.

Look at me.

Look at me right now.

AO3 protects you.

AO3 protects you and your works. 

It protects your works from copyright strikes and DCMA takedowns.

It protects your work from advertisers.

It protects your work from overzealous legal challenges.

It protects your right to post adult content.

AO3 is non-profit and AO3 will never try to use you or your work to make a profit for themselves and AO3 will go to bat for you if someone tries to legally challenge you or your works.

Please respect AO3 and its mission.

[dannitarot]

The Good Stuff for July 2025 *mini reading *

This is a mini reading. I’ll be doing another reading on another topic soon.Most likely a love reading.

Pile 1 -> 3

Pile 1

You’ll be so supported this month. You’ll be nurturing your relationships. Especially with friends. You could spend more time with your mom or a mother figure. A lot of you are spending time with friends. Going out and having a good time. A lot of your relationships are evolving. I’m seeing that feminine energies will be so important this July. You might want to do some research on the heart chakra because I’m picking up on something in relation to that. Some of you could find out you or someone close to you is pregnant. A lot of fertile energy. This could also just be about putting love and effort into something you already started. For example, a painting you haven’t completed or a business plan you haven’t put into action yet. Whatever this is, it’s something you’re passionate about. I see that you’ll also be getting a lot of attention. People will be pouring into you even more than you have been pouring into them. You’re being put on the pedestal this month. You’ll be feeling like the main character. I’m also seeing that money is looking good for you. I see you’ll also be developing healthier habits especially relating to diet.

Pile 2

Someone’s coming with a romantic proposal of some sort. This has love written all over it. Trying to keep the reading PG but some of you are doing the deed this month. Someone is coming to court you. You find this person to be ideal for you and super attractive. You’ll be going on dates and just enjoying each other’s company. Some of you could end up moving in together. You guys will be committed to this person. They want marriage with you. This person is your divine counterpart. This is the person you will marry. This relationship feels like home to the both of you. I’m also seeing some of you could move into a bigger home or make changes with your place.

Pile 3

You’ll be solving some kind of issue with someone you had a disagreement with. This could be someone you work with or have some kind of relationship with. Someone finds you so unique and addictive. They are coming forward with a love offer. Something about this connection could be “forbidden”. If you’re active on social media, your post will be getting lots of views, likes and positive comments. You could go viral this month.some of you are changing careers to do something you’re more passionate about or just finding happiness in your current job. I’m seeing you’ll be doing good financially as well. A lot of stable income. You’ll be saving a lot of money. You will be paying off money that you owe. I see some of you will be getting new clothes and shoes.

[forty-servants-free-readings]

Pick a pile

What will married life be like for you?

Pick a group to find out, your reading is under the cut. If you're interested in a short, free oracle reading - feel free to send question to my askbox, anon is on. Answers are extremely slow due to demand and busy personal life, from time to time I go on hiatus. There is also paid offer, explained in my pinned post - those readings will be prioritised. If you want to support me there is a PayPal link in my bio.

Pick a pile masterlist

Group 1 - The Father

Your marriage will be full of love and care, but don't expect suffocating levels of affection. You and your spouse will learn a lot from each other. Both of you will gain plenty of life wisdom to share with future generations. Probably you will have a child. Whenever problems arise, the two of you will manage them very well, in a mature and effective way.

Group 2 - The Master

You and your future spouse will constantly improve yourself. Your marriage will help you advance in life. You will get many opportunities to develop your skills and grow as a person. Your character will definitely be refined by this union. Both of you will put in plenty of work to push your relationship forward and always do you best to make it work even better.

Group 3 - The Fortunate

Your marriage will feel like a blessing. It will be pretty easy and very satisfying connection. I feel like you won't be very stressed, therefore staying in good health will be easy for you. I also see that you won't have to worry about money too much. Your marriage might help you advance in life easier, like a gift from fate. You will be very happy.

Group 4 - The Guru

One of you will be more experienced in life than the other, and will lead their partner through uncertain moments.There is a huge emphasis on practicality and caring about the results. Ultimately your marriage will not as much teach you how to deal with things, as it will teach you how to find a way to deal with them. There is an atmosphere of mutual trust and respect here.

[a-friend-of-mara]

Hii

Forewarning, long ass rant

A lot of writers in the big name studios aren't great at writing and don't know how to make every kind of character good... read: gay character who's whole personality is being gay... considering that and the fact that a lotta the writers are men, sometimes they just don't know how to write good female characters so they end up not doing well and people dont like the characters as much...

On the other end of the spectrum... yall remember when the Disney trilogy of star wars movies came out and armchair debate teams were like "you just don't like it because you don't like strong female characters and Rey is a strong female character" and then the star wars fans were like "counterpoint, Ahsoka Tano",... Ahsoka was written well and had legit character development across her appearances. She went from a cocky teenage padawan to one of the most disciplined Jedis in the galixy and I'm still mad about her getting prosecuted for murder even though I watched that season when I was like 12. Rey doesn't fucking earn it.

How's this for a hot take? Instead of deciding someone's gender or sexuality as the first part of writing their character, how about we do that last?

Let's follow the path of "we need a silly goofball character" leads to "Why are they a silly goofball? What makes them act that way?" Leads to "well, we could go with 'they like to bring joy to people and try to make people smile by making them laugh' or we could go with the arguably more narratively interesting 'they're internally very sad or insecure and they prefer to try to laugh through the pain than deal with it head on'" then that leads into a discussion about how that character could fit into the cast of characters, if they have any backstory elements that will be relevant or they want to make relevant, then after that, after a character has been created, give them a name, race, gender, and sexyality.

I suck hot shit at writing for my ttrpg games but the NPCs my characters love always end up being the ones I did this with

(Dont mind me i just get mad when I see something and can say "they didn't try very hard with this"... it makes me mad because you're in a position that people would do a lot to get into, treat your position of influence with the respect, care, and effort it deserves)

i dont really know how to articulate this but its crazy just how many people dont even realize they dont care about female characters. all their faves are men. they never talk about girls without being led into it. and when you try to point this out to them they try to defend themselves that their faves are just the archetypes they like, despite clearly not caring when that same archetype is a woman. like i feel like at a certain point it is your problem with the common denominator if you cant find a single female character to enjoy

[sylviaplatypus]

from what i can tell the reviews about this are mixed but tbh i was personally a huge fan of joe and nicky’s characterizations in this film. spoilery highlights after the cut

nicky basically “back in my day”ing nile for her question about whether the guard ever gets time off like the grandpa he is

the glimpses of how truly unhinged a millennia of being immortal has made them: laughing about booker getting his head blown off by a cannon, their shared amusement at joe’s funny guy bit with his severed thumb, the gleeful competitiveness over who drives which car, nicky teasing joe for not hot wiring his car as fast, playfully racing one another with their stolen vehicles. all while in the middle of a goddamn heist where bullets are flying everywhere lmaooo that’s deranged behavior and i love them for it.

speaking of the cars!! how even their driving is perfectly in sync!!!!!

i’ve seen a few posts saying that it was obvious nicky knew something was up with joe after he deflected nicky’s question about the mysterious text, and i totally agree, but i think he knew way sooner. that look he gives joe after nile asks if they think booker is doing okay is very Telling (citation: i’ve been with my spouse for a decade and can tell right away when something’s off with them, imagine that compounded by a literal thousand years!! i wouldn’t be surprised if nicky’s been suspicious of something since the moment joe made contact with booker)

the fact that joe crashed their goddamn car because he was looking at nicky instead of the road. relatable. 

the old married couple energy being so strong it almost blew me off my couch!!! bickering about snoring and sleep talking before going to bed at the same time, i’m weak

nicky’s loaded “huh, okay” to joe’s announcement that he needs some time alone. kudos to luca marinelli for being able to imbue a couple of filler words with such meaning. that meaning ofc being that nicky knows his man too well to believe he’s telling the truth about wanting to be alone. 

nicky’s little whispered “te amo” when he and joe part ways, sobbb

“we’re following him” / “what?” genuinely made me laugh out loud 

fully believe nicky would have been fine with joe going his separate way for a bit if he truly did need a little time and space. but i love that he follows him (and forces nile into a Situation in the process lol) because at this point he’s probably known for months that something’s been off with joe, and now he’s lying??? about needing something nicky would be willing to give him if joe were only telling the truth?? ofc that’s the tipping point for nicky.

not really a character development choice, but i am genuinely curious about why joe is bringing booker lemons. is there reason to be concerned about booker’s citrus intake?

the conflict is delicious to me!! love to see my favorite fictional ships argue because those moments reveal a lot about who people are, individually and as a unit. and joe and nicky fight like the old marrieds they are, like two people who are unflappable in the certainty that their foundation is too solid to crack under the pressure of a prolonged disagreement like this. it reminds me a lot of one of my favorite quotes from the haunting of hill house: “you fight with love. you're on the same team even in the middle of a fight. during the fight, you're forgiven. there's no fear. there's no danger. you're safe. it's a beautiful way to be.”

speaking of the Argument, my personal old married take is that it wasn’t joe being in contact with booker that upset nicky as much as it was the extended lie of omission joe told by not letting nicky in on this fact sooner. nicky has spent six months believing they were on the same page, that they’d both agreed to the terms of this painful exile - painful not only for booker, but for them as well because it meant losing a brother. nicky sat in that pain alone for months without realizing it, all because, as nicky pointed out, joe assumed he knew how nicky would react instead of talking with him. they’re supposed to be a team, and joe left him in the dark on this one! so it feels like it's not so much about his anger that joe is talking to booker again and more about joe shutting nicky out of his very understandable struggle with their decision to cut ties with him. 

yusuf went to see him! yusuf!!! (cue hilary duff’s this is what dreams are made of)

truly unwell over the cliffs of moher backstory and how beautifully it sums up their characters, their relationship, and the nature of this conflict arc. the game was playful and competitive like they've been shown to be, but when it came down to following through, nicky was too stubborn, steadfast, and consistent to give up first - just like he couldn’t move past what booker did as easily as joe, just like he waited until joe came to him to put a punctuation mark on the argument and finally tell nicky what’s really been bothering him. 

“talk to me,” nicky says and nothing else - and when joe does, he meets him with understanding but also objective facts. it’s a beautiful counterpoint to joe’s romantic monologue in the first film. no flowery prose, because nicky isn’t a poet like joe, but still just as moving in its simple truths (things end, and so will we eventually. but this thing that i feel for you because i know your heart isn’t an arbitrary happenstance. it’s a deliberate choice made countless times over countless years. and everything that’s a product of that love will ripple outward through eternity). 

 every battle couple moment. every single one of them.

joe kicking the guard onto nicky’s sword was definitely a precursor to the make up sex they need to have and i’m so glad that, if nothing else, we can all agree on this.

[hyakunana]

A pawn that crossed the field and bloomed into human anew. That is Kamen Rider Cameo.

(In which my friends suggested me to make a Geats OC to play with theirs... and of damn course it's a Jyamato 🧍‍♀️)

Some more sketches under the cut because I liked them enough to share as well ✨ more details in ALT caps

[skreel-the-red-thing]

OKAY time for a review. I was… midly convinced by the sequel. In my opinion it’s a not so bad movie plagued by a not so good writing. I’m going to be vulgar at some point, don’t mind me that’s my way of coping. Let’s dive.

MIND THE SPOILERS OFC

What’s bad :

- Let’s adress the elephant in the room to get rid of it : « Nile can remove immortality » is bullshit. It's so stupid, it means that if by mistake she hurts Joe or Nicky in training then paf ! RIP gay people. I don’t buy it and I don’t think anybody here does. I understand they needed a threat for the gang, but why not just threaten them to lock them up in iron coffins, Quynh’s style ? Like, you established the worst fate for an immortal in  the first movie, why not use it again ?

- Speaking of Quynh. My girl is out of water with no trauma, speaking perfect english (language of those who locked her up. Mh.) and not insane ? Eh, a bit disappointing.

- No enough labrys in my opinion.

- Booker. Booker, Booker, Booker. He's my favorite character so I'm very pissed off *spit a bullet*. Ngl, I expected him to die and it didn't seem like such a bad idea. BUT THE EXECUTION WAS TERRIBLE. My man deserved so much better, he has almost no development, no redemption arc and he dies like shit, mostly out of selfishness: he knew Andy was as tired of life as he was, but he preferred to die and hand her the hot potato without asking her opinion. Erf. Also they both could have walked through that door, the “sacrifice” doesn't make any sense I'M GOING TO BREAK SOMETHING

- JoeNicky try not be captured challenge.

- Also Joe and Nicky had an argument at the beginning of the movie about Booker and Joe lying, and they made up while talking about something entirely different LIKE HELLO? The conflict isn't resolved here. It was cute tho, we like declaration and foreheads touch.

- HOWEVER. Nicky saying "ti amo" and Joe not responding ? DO YOU WANT ME TO GO TO THERAPY ?? Joe, when your husband says "ti amo", even if you feel guilty because you're lying to him, you say "ti amo" back.

- Do I need to point out what a flat character Discord is? I couldn't care less about her. Even pharma bro in the first film was more menacing.

- WHERE'S COPLEY? Like at the end, the guy might be dead, we don't know. Schrödinger's Copley.

- Tuah is... here. He has potential, but he's underdeveloped, so I don't have much to say. From my point of view, he's a bit of cannon fodder for the next film, to sacrifice his immortality to Quynh.

- Shall we talk about the dreams  stuff ? Well, it never really made any sense, either in the first film or in the comics. Like Nile dreams about Quyhn but Booker don’t ? Weird. And now ? Oh boy. Tuah dreaming about all the others but they don’t. And Discord ? Seriously, when you set up a mythology, you've got to make it logical, otherwise how are we suppose to write coherent fanfictions afterwards?

- I fucking HATE cliffhangers. Especially since  we've waited 5 years for this movie, and knowing Netflix's cancellation policy. At any point, Joe, Nicky, Nile and Tuah remain in a vacuum packing for eternity because we won't get a third movie.

NOW WHAT’S GOOD !

- Okay. I complain a lot, but I was super happy to see the sequel and to get to see again these characters that I love so much. I'm waiting for third movie to bring them all back to me. Yes, even you Booker. I'm delulu about him.

- I liked the vibe a lot ! It was less dark than the first movie, with more moments to breathe and appreciate the atmosphere between the characters. Special mention to the dinner scene after the first mission, I'm delighted to know that drunk Nicky snores like a boar.

- The film was more beautiful and colorful than the first one, and direction was better in my opinion, especially the fight scenes and choreography.

- NILE IS COOL! Her McGuffin role sucks, but it's not her fault, and besides that every time she was on screen I was like “damn, what a gigantic charisma she got!” . My girl is so stunning it hurts. Also the double spear ? Made for her.

- I still like Booker more than anything. I still like the fact that he jumped the second he had the opportunity to end himself. I just think it could have been handled better.

- « Has she spoken of me ? » « She never stopped. » MAYBE I DIED THERE.

- I'm relieved to finally have the answer to the question “If they cut off a limb, how does it heal?” and for that I thank Joe's thumb and Booker's head in the maze.

- I didn't get any sapphic kiss and that’s a shame, but the AndyQuynh relationship was cool anyway. Special mention to the whole reunion sequence, with Andy passing through the eras with the team in background, it was the most beautiful part of the movie.

- The soundtrack was better handled than in the first film. It doesn't look like much, but for me it was a major flaw, so I'm glad they've sorted it out.

IN CONCLUSION it was... okay. Now let's go another five years of waiting.

[tookishcombeferre]

An animator once told me that the best thing to do is go out in your yard or coffee shop and watch people and animals move.

As you watch, draw the movements.

I dance. Here’s a chalk drawing I did recently at a pride event about dancing with my daughter/ on my own in a costume she makes me wear a lot.

I kept my line art pretty simple here.

But, you can see the progression of the movement.

Granted, this is a movement I do a fair amount, so it’s something I can literally feel.

However, there are a *ton* of videos of dancers you can find online to sketch from.

Also, like don’t be afraid to copy master artists in your own hand at a museum or something. People do that all the time to learn.

Eventually, one day, you start going off script from the copy and doing something bonkers, and THAT’S where your style develops. It’s what makes writing fic a useful tool for my writer folks as well.

Eventually, you suddenly find yourself developing your own style and your own world from the worlds you’ve seen.

When I draw landscape? You can DEFINITELY see Van Gogh’s influence in how I paint.

However, I prefer water color and acrylic to oils.

And, you can also see a little bit of some more classical pastoral artists as well. I like to catch a *little* more detail than a true impressionist would.

This is what makes human copies different from AI copies. I can paint Starry Night in water color, but my love for the Impressionist movement is going to come through in my copy. What I’ve studied of their history is going to come through in that copy. My devotion to Van Gogh’s story is going to come through in that copy.

This is what makes humans different from computers. We learn by copying too, but what we learn is different.

I learned that I liked the swirling movement that Van Gogh so often incorporates into his brush strokes because it reminds me of the way music looks when I hear it. It reminds me of a sound wave.

So, I want to incorporate it into my own painting.

I learned that I loved the detail of sheep’s wool and stars in traditional pastoral work, so even in those swirling strokes - I want those shapes to remain distinctive.

That meant I needed a medium that could accommodate me.

Acrylic is often the best for that.

Water color can work, but generally I make it multi-medium and will draw on top with pencil. Or scan it into a computer (when I have software to do so available- I haven’t in decades) and sketch over the top in an editing program to add detail/ characters or whatever.

But, all of this started by copying the masters in my own way, watching things in the real world, and then combining them in a style that was mine.

All of that + what’s listed above is a part of learning. And, heck - touching grass? Observing nature and people - that’s all free my dudes.

Can't afford art school?

After seeing post like this 👇

And this gem 👇

As well as countless of others from the AI generator community. Just talking about how "inaccessible art" is, I decided why not show how wrong these guys are while also helping anyone who actually wants to learn.

Here is the first one ART TEACHERS! There are plenty online and in places like youtube.

📺Here is my list:

Proko (Free)

Marc Brunet (Free but he does have other classes for a cheap price. Use to work for Blizzard)

Aaron Rutten (free)

BoroCG (free)

Jesse J. Jones (free, talks about animating)

Jesus Conde (free)

Mohammed Agbadi (free, he gives some advice in some videos and talks about art)

Ross Draws (free, he does have other classes for a good price)

SamDoesArts (free, gives good advice and critiques)

Drawfee Show (free, they do give some good advice and great inspiration)

The Art of Aaron Blaise ( useful tips for digital art and animation. Was an animator for Disney)

Bobby Chiu ( useful tips and interviews with artist who are in the industry or making a living as artist)

Second part BOOKS, I have collected some books that have helped me and might help others.

📚Here is my list:

The "how to draw manga" series produced by Graphic-sha. These are for manga artist but they give great advice and information.

"Creating characters with personality" by Tom Bancroft. A great book that can help not just people who draw cartoons but also realistic ones. As it helps you with facial ques and how to make a character interesting.

"Albinus on anatomy" by Robert Beverly Hale and Terence Coyle. Great book to help someone learn basic anatomy.

"Artistic Anatomy" by Dr. Paul Richer and Robert Beverly Hale. A good book if you want to go further in-depth with anatomy.

"Directing the story" by Francis Glebas. A good book if you want to Story board or make comics.

"Animal Anatomy for Artists" by Eliot Goldfinger. A good book for if you want to draw animals or creatures.

"Constructive Anatomy: with almost 500 illustrations" by George B. Bridgman. A great book to help you block out shadows in your figures and see them in a more 3 diamantine way.

"Dynamic Anatomy: Revised and expand" by Burne Hogarth. A book that shows how to block out shapes and easily understand what you are looking out. When it comes to human subjects.

"An Atlas of animal anatomy for artist" by W. Ellenberger and H. Dittrich and H. Baum. This is another good one for people who want to draw animals or creatures.

Etherington Brothers, they make books and have a free blog with art tips.

As for Supplies, I recommend starting out cheap, buying Pencils and art paper at dollar tree or 5 below. For digital art, I recommend not starting with a screen art drawing tablet as they are more expensive.

For the Best art Tablet I recommend either Xp-pen, Bamboo or Huion. Some can range from about 40$ to the thousands.

💻As for art programs here is a list of Free to pay.

Clip Studio paint ( you can choose to pay once or sub and get updates)

Procreate ( pay once for $9.99)

Blender (for 3D modules/sculpting, ect Free)

PaintTool SAI (pay but has a 31 day free trail)

Krita (Free)

mypaint (free)

FireAlpaca (free)

Libresprite (free, for pixel art)

Those are the ones I can recall.

So do with this information as you will but as you can tell there are ways to learn how to become an artist, without breaking the bank. The only thing that might be stopping YOU from using any of these things, is YOU.

I have made time to learn to draw and many artist have too. Either in-between working two jobs or taking care of your family and a job or regular school and chores. YOU just have to take the time or use some time management, it really doesn't take long to practice for like an hour or less. YOU also don't have to do it every day, just once or three times a week is fine.

Hope this was helpful and have a great day.

[thattimdrakeguy]

Yeah, Tim SHOULD still be Robin.

When it comes to the discussion of whether or not Tim should still be Robin, especially when I see so many comic book site articles about it--it bugs me. It's almost always written from the perspective of artificial rules, rather than the characters themselves.

And I won't lie to you.

That's sort of dumb.

I think if you write your characters based on superficial rules and not what they'd naturally do, you are almost definitely not a good character writer. You're instead kind of a hack.

If you wanna be convinced that Tim should be Robin still, you'll probably want to read this. We go through it all, from origins, to character development. To even bringing up Luke Skywalker, Han Solo, EDDIE BROCK, and even FLASH THOMPSON. To make the point as clear as it can be. So strap in, or strap on if you really have to do that while you read this. What ever floats your boat Time management is important and I hear that's been a lucrative industry for quite some time now.

Originally I was just going to be annoying and force this post to be super long on your dash and in the tags, but I don't have the heart to do that. But please, check out what's said down below.

Robin was never meant to be specifically a children's role, there was no reason to believe Dick would ever stop being Robin, until the 80s, when continuity was held in lot stronger regard, and they cared possibly way too much about the marketability of Batman and Robin as a duo.

Any time they showed an older Dick beforehand, if he wasn't already Batman to take the place of Bruce specifically, he was still Robin, because why would he not be? Seriously, why wouldn't he be? This is what was going to be expected from Robin.

So they made another Robin, in this case Jason, to be the Robin of Batman and Robin, and they honestly just got pretty lucky Dick at that point had been in a continuing character arc about getting out of Batman's shadow to begin with. So wanting a name less associated with Batman worked.

They got lucky that worked as well as it did.

And people still complained, because let's face it, it's kind of stupid to a degree. But there was enough logic that it stuck.

And then readers and writers didn't like Jason. Sure, maybe the vote was rigged. But there has been enough stated that would still greatly imply enough people didn't like Jason enough to motivate the idea to have the vote to kill him off to begin with. You simply don't normally do that with a beloved character.

So they made Tim Drake, a character who's entire existence, revolves around being Robin.

And allow me to explain what I mean by that, because given nearly every Robin was made with the intention to be Robin, that sounds like a pretty stupid statement.

For example.

Why is Dick Robin?

Because he is Robin. That was his crimefighter alias. What are you talking about?

Stupid question.

Why was Jason Robin?

Better question.

Because he was taken in, and depending on the continuity, was either gifted the title from Dick, or just plain freaking gave it by Batman, because, boy I don't know why they went with that. Certainly didn't help Jason's case when they were in the process of making him a rough around the edges character, people weren't gonna naturally like when his violent tendencies were revealed.

Why was Tim Robin?

Marv Wolfman basically had to make sure this character HAD to be Robin when making him. If they had another child die on Batman, Bruce may be seen as an f'n sadist for picking up more orphans almost as if he got enjoyment out of it.

Tim's life story was basically leading up to the point he became the third Robin.

He was there when the Grayson's fell, he figured out Batman and Robin's identity, he tracked down Dick to try and get him to be Robin again because he believed in Robin so much. He loved Robin over Batman.

And as even stated by Marv Wolfman himself, had no aspirations to be anything but Robin.

So do you now hopefully see the difference between a character that was made Robin, and a character that was made specifically to be the defacto Robin going forward, with his entire real world backstory entirely designed to be Robin, where as other characters were made to be themselves first and for most? (after post-crisis for Jason, but still.)

Robin was just who Dick was.

Robin was what Jason was given to try something new after Pre-Crisis Jason was a creative failure.

Robin was everything that motivated and powered who Tim is as a person and character.

You can take Robin away from Jason, and he'd still be who he is, just not Robin. A street kid, with bad mental health, but a heroic heart.

You take Robin away from Tim and what are you left with? Nobody really. Because so much of who Tim is, is specifically dictated by ROBIN.

Now obviously character development is a thing, but if you try to look at me straight in the eye and tried to convince me that DC handled everything amazingly in the transition from Tim to Damian, I'll laugh straight in your face.

Writers can write whatever they want. These characters aren't real people. I'm not gonna take what just any writer wrote as gospel, because this is a creative medium, and I can have my own opinions on rather or not I think an art piece achieved its goals. And I think having characters contradict past behaviors and beliefs to make something happen is some pretty awful character writing.

Seriously, I dare you to read Tim's entire Robin existence and act like you can give it a character analysis the same way you could a character like Jesse Pinkman or someone.

You'd be lying to yourself if you said you could because you couldn't. After a while they couldn't even keep consistency between series. Read Tim during One Year Later, both in Teen Titans, and his own Robin series, it's like two totally separate people. You'd have to do mental gymnastics to try and make it work.

We had mentally worn down, but still idealistic Boy Detective Tim going on the same time as--

Angsty, miserable, obsessive super genius scientist Tim--

Tim had never even been a scientist before, he's just a bit geeky. How the hell did he do this?

So let's not bother, shall we?

If we're gonna talk quality decisions, we have to deal with quality writing.

And I actually like Damian as Dick's Robin. It's the only time that character personally worked for me. But the way they handled it happening was absolutely terrible. This is not me hating on the character. You'll catch me shitting on a lot of Damian comics, nearly all of them even, but the character himself? I actually quite liked him when Grant Morrison was writing him, and I don't normally like their stuff.

Hell, I'd make the argument Damian should move on from Robin.

Maybe that sounds stupid to some. 'Oh but he's still a kid' some of you may say.

To which I say, okay cool, if that's still how you feel. But I'm gonna apply the same logic to him as I do Tim and say his character doesn't revolve around the role of Robin, if anything he was made to be the anti-Robin, which was the charm of the Dick-Bats Batman and Robin series.

Damian wanted to be Robin initially during his first appearance, because he thought it would get him closer to his father.

Then he found out that was a superficial belief he only believed because the League of Assassins taught him a superficial belief, and it was a cool moment that sparked the beginning of Damian's evolution as a person.

Damian only became an official Robin because marketing wise it looked better than 'Batman, and the Son of Batman, but not the Son of this Batman, the Son of That Other Batman, The Other Specifically Believed To Be Dead Batman That In Fact Isn't Actually Dead'.

And it would be less confusing why Robin, in this hypothetical, Tim, isn't with Batman, and this other guy is, because companies have to assume everyone isn't gonna spend the time to research it. They wanna coax you into an impulse purchase. That helps money be made. Making you have to think about what the title means it takes away the impulse part of the impulse purchase. Or even worse, confuses you enough if you take a gander inside to the point you back off entirely because it seems far too complicated. That's no way to do business.

Now, of course, all Robins are made with potential dollar signs in DC's eyes. We're not going to kid ourselves here either. It's just pretty obviously done to a whole different extent with Damian.

And to a degree that's fine, because that's how comics often work, because it's a floundering industry and people get desperate, so they throw something that's bound to get immediate attention in your face in hopes you'll get curious enough to purchase it.

But we're talking about the writing here.

Giving an entitled child what they want after nearly murdering a character is absolutely stupid logic though. Certainly when your writing characters that are meant to be very intelligent. Gets even worse when you realize within the universe's own timeline, they show Tim regularly calls Dick to discuss his mental health only weeks (months at best) prior.

And Dick was also there when Tim said he doesn't want to be anything but Robin.

So they end up making Dick look either apathetic, or like an idiot, or even worse, an apathetic idiot, who makes bad decisions.

Because given the context that Tim was very mentally ill (even if not, honestly, it'd still be crooked regardless), and barely recovered (or not at all recovered depending on the series you were reading) from his depression, and that's before Bruce was believed to be dead--How else is he supposed to take this beyond being kicked to the curb.

Grieving makes you care more about the ones you love, not do something that'll cause the low-key suicidal kid to maybe jump off a roof.

Why would an intelligent, and caring, downright protective person like Dick Grayson make a decision like this? Saying 'because Damian needed it' doesn't quite cut it when you look at more of the details, and is quite a narrow minded excuse that only looks at a minor percentage of it.

People make excuses for this, mostly because they love Dick and hate the idea of him looking bad, but let's take a moment to ground ourselves and be real. These are not real people, and they do not make their own decisions. Writers make their decisions. Characters are illusions of personalities and physical appearances created by consistency and expectations of what these characters look, do, and say.

This is how we have the term 'out of character'.

And no character is safe from that fate forever.

Dick can say he views Tim as an equal to do it, and the artist can randomly draw Tim to look more mature and adult despite that completely contradicting known things about the character (made all the worse when you have the same exact artist that drew Tim being called out for being baby faced and short drawing him to look like Season 4 Sam Winchester when only weeks passed by, by the end of the Robin series).

You don't even have to take a look that far back in the past and you can still see neither of those things were done because it was a natural development. It was only done because they wanted an excuse to shove Tim out of the role, or at the very least because they didn't care about the character.

Hence why this is considered out of character.

Does this help you see the logic of the issue now?

And that isn't me criticizing the character of Damian, because that's just who he is, and I like who Damian is. I hate comics that seem to hate having to write Damian for who he is actually. I'm criticizing the writer's decisions in the process of making this transition, and the aftermath, and effect it has to this very day with these characters.

Damian existing is fine.

Some might argue it's not, but oh well.

It's the writing quality and real world decision making that isn't fine, when it concerns our primarily topic.

But point being is Tim's entire motivation as a character revolves around being Robin, being there for Batman, the entire symbolism of the character Robin. It was him who defined the role out loud for readers who were starting to not understand why Robin should even be around still, to understand why Robin is still around.

I don't care how unimportant Tim's been in recent history, that's thanks to a lack of care, not the character himself--Tim is, as far as the role itself is concerned, possibly the second most important Robin in history after Dick.

Jason's death is clearly important, but for years more so do to the effect it had on Batman's personality, not the role of Robin and what it represents, given it was not that long before Tim became Robin. Understand me from that context. I don't know if people think there was a larger space between them, but there wasn't. So they went from murder of a kid to 'Batman Needs a Robin' pretty fast.

And I don't care if someone is a woman, or a blood son in the role. That furthers their own characters, but ultimately does nothing for the role itself outside of themselves. Once they're done being in that role, that aspect of the role is gone.

Tim's addition retroactively yet thankfully accurately and thoughtfully established important aspects of the role that gave people a whole new perspective and appreciation of the role, granting a new level of popularity to something that was beginning to grow tired. That's permanently seared into the character legacy now thanks to Tim. To the point bad writers have Dick to be the one to say it, either because their bad at their job, or they just assumed.

Being the character who was able to do that is huge.

That's how important Tim Drake is to Robin.

I can't think of anything that would be more important to the history of Robin past being created at all than that.

To be honest, thinking Tim shouldn't be Robin anymore, shows a lack of understanding of Tim as a character, what he wants, what makes him tick, what makes him feel successful.

He would become comparatively boring and generic without Robin. Think of all the aspects of his drama, thought processes, motivations that would be removed. I know he'd still have other aspects to him that'd remain, he isn't literally only Robin and nothing but...but he's going to suffer a whole lot worse than any other character taken away from Robin.

This doesn't make him a bad character like some may claim. I'd argue against the notion very much. All characters simply aren't created for the same purposes. Tim is a magnificent character when handled well, and works amazing when allowed to be in the role he was built to be in.

We're not gonna start pulling artificial standards of what makes a good character, like we aren't obviously all aware Luke Skywalker and Han Solo were made for totally different purposes, and are still both extraordinary characters in their own right.

Don't play dumb.

And I say that with respect, despite the harsh wording, because I understand not everyone is going to be familiar with these decade old comics, and interviews you have to search out to find. I'm not a crazy person. Well, I am a bit, for caring this much, but I have limits to my insanity.

And I used the word dumb to keep your attention, because this post is going on for an unusually long amount of time, but it's a subject I am passionate about. So please excuse me for that.

A lot of you will likely have came in during the time Tim wasn't Robin, and would have no reason to assume there's anything inherently odd with Tim not being Robin. We are humans, and aren't granted the ability of omni-knowledge of all things.

Think of it like Venom--yes, Venom is often not Eddie, but it always goes back to him, yeah? Because these detours can be fun, but ultimately Venom was meant to be with Eddie.

You can bring up Tim not being the original Robin. I can hear some of you thinking that right now.

(Yes, I can hear thoughts, it's my cross to bear. And for that person in particular, close that tab, you know that's morally wrong, don't try to excuse it.)

But also it was Peter Parker that first had Venom wasn't it?

(I know the symbiote by itself isn't supposed to be called Venom, and how that's a modern thing, but I'm not gonna talk about a completely irrelevant topic so I can make this point.)

And we didn't even know the 'suit' as it was known as at the time was even sentient.

It's an example of a thing growing and becoming more developed, with logic and great character work backing it up, to make it a good development that can be long lasting, because it was built with a good base to keep the structure up. Like building a long lasting house.

Not one of those Amazon build a houses, that would get blown over in a mildly harsh breeze.

And I don't mean that as an insult to Stephanie or Damian, but it is factual to my knowledge that these characters were made Robin to be killed. They were both literally killed, and we have to acknowledge this truth to their characters. These weren't even decisions made to last.

You can like them in that role, but it doesn't change the facts.

If anything I think both characters are blessed that they have enough to them, to be brought back, and they have lots of potential...if they'd let them actually be expanded. They aren't cemented to Robin in anyway the same way Tim is for better or worse, and they don't have to be Robin to work to their full ability like how it is for Tim.

Besides if the character is worth it, they stick around in a different way.

Agent Anti-Venom for Flash Thompson as an example. Agent Venom was great, but it was time for Venom to go back to Eddie. But we gave him a place to stay around and he's great there too.

This was sort of what Red Robin was going to be turned into for Tim when they realized having Tim go against everything he stood for was a really bizarre decision that likely wouldn't last with any lasting success, but it was just kind of weird to have the person that fills the role of Robin not just be Robin, while the other person is going around mostly doing their own thing.

Why should Tim Drake actually not be Robin really? He's not even as old as Dick was when he stopped being Robin if you wanna bring up the Robin is a kid's role thing.

And I do know Dick said Robin was a kid's thing after all, but you are aware that these Robins are individuals and not all the same person, right?

Tim isn't Dick, and clearly has a very different opinion of what Robin is to him. Otherwise why wouldn't Dick become Robin again himself? See what I'm saying?

Dick literally implied Robin was a kid's role to Tim's face, in Tim's origin story, and Tim continued to not give a shit, because Tim still believed what he believed despite that.

If you like Tim being something other than Robin, and you like those identities, and series, I am happy for you. Because more enjoyment in the world is a positive thing.

But ultimately even Red Robin was never anything more than a very-very modest success the more it went on, it made enough to stay afloat, yet not enough to carry it past the reboot (though Didio hating legacy characters he wasn't involved with may have to do with that) and the entire theme of the book was "What if we have Tim do things Tim would never do" to the point it's out right said in the book. Which sounds like a terrible model of what Tim should be to me.

If you wouldn't want that same fate with any major character like an Avenger or Justice Leaguer, or your own favorite character whoever that may be, why would you want that with Tim beyond you just not caring as much? And if you don't care that much, why are you so concerned with what Tim is or isn't?

I just want it to be understood from a more objective (if you can even call it that, because, I know, strong word to use here. i'm not ignorant of that, nor that arrogant) point of view, based on the simple idea that, hmm maybe the best character writing is just writing the characters being the characters--it makes the most sense for Tim to be the Robin that stays aboard as Robin.

So, I say to you, humble reader, let Tim Drake remain Robin. It's what works best.

[creatingblackcharacters]

I’m in a fandom that has an ensemble cast with a Black character in it, and it’s a fairly big fandom so generally there are a lot of character headcanons/fanon out there for the media.

I’m starting to notice that there is a pattern where people will headcanon basically the entire cast as Queer…except for the Black character. I’ve seen people joking about him being the “token straight” one and it kind of rubs me the wrong way. I think I’ve seen it 3 or 4 times now. Everyone but him will have intricate micro labels, but the Black character is just, straight.

Like, do they not care about him enough to evaluate what his identity might be? They just slap “straight” on him because they can’t be bothered to care about a Black character and think of headcanons for him? This is NOT to say headcanoning characters as straight is a bad thing, but I did notice that it seems to happen to the Black character strangely often.

And like, if they do genuinely headcanon him like that, why did they make him the butt of the joke? Why not just say the headcanon and move on? Why does their headcanon for him revolve solely around a joke?

If they have to make jokes about it, there are comic relief characters in the cast other than him—it is an ensemble.

I’m not sure if im overreacting here so I was curious what your thoughts were.

You're not seeing things. It's likely because they cannot project a white view of queer identity onto him, or just don't care enough about a Black character enough to develop the idea.

[kkoct-ik]

milgram analysis: how mikoto introjects and conforms himself to social misconceptions around DID

analysing mikoto's character, how Milgram frames DID to characters and audience, and following how mikoto's sense of self and presentation develops in response to Milgram and the DID label.

(google docs ver for ease of reading)

will be referring to milgram-en's (John Doe, Neoplasm, interrogation) and Maristelina's (timeline) translations. thank you for your work!

note on content: i am die-hard autistic about DID representation.

as of writing this essay, i've already written two long analytical essays criticising mikoto's reception, and sharing my (strong) opinions on how i believe his DID functions.

while it's not necessary to have read my previous essays to understand this one, if you would like to understand my take on him in more depth, or just read more of my criticism around DID representation, you can find links to them here on my website!

note on names: for the purposes of this post:

mikoto refers to the person/system, all parts included

'mikoto' refers to any normative part of mikoto, when intentionally distinguished (ie. when the idea of mikoto having a 'normal' self is evoked and spoken of in opposition to an 'other' self)

mikoto (俺) refers to the 'othered' mikoto that appears in the John Doe (Trial 1) voice drama and attacks es. it also refers to the 'othered' mikoto from the timeline conversations, as that is the pronoun used, although these are not necessarily 'the same alter'.

mikoto (オレ) refers to the 'othered' mikoto that appears in the Neoplasm (Trial 2) voice drama and claims to be the alter who commit murder.

i'm working with translations and 09 is a complicated character, so please forgive any slip ups!

thank you for reading.

introduction: why do social misconceptions matter?

in my experience, a lot of discussions about mikoto are dominated by the fact that he has DID.

more specifically, i find that a lot of discussions around mikoto are dominated by the impression that his dissociative disorder indicates that 'plurality' or 'systemhood' is his inherent state of being. i find many people believe that having DID makes you 'a system' of discrete parts / alters / personalities, while others who do not suffer from DID, are not. therefore, the reveal of mikoto's DID is the reveal that mikoto is not one identity, but instead a 'system' of multiple alters that are yet to be defined and discovered.

this way of understanding mikoto leads many to interpret es', jackalope's, and kotoko's labelling of mikoto with DID as a generally neutral act — or even a positive one.

while mikoto, for the most part, is not aware of his DID, and being forced to be aware of his symptoms may be destabilising, because it is a 'fact' he has DID, this label being applied to him would seem to ultimately be an act that brings us closer to understanding mikoto and the truth that lies within him. it would seem that by reaching this label, adapting how we see him according to it, and subsequently communicating with mikoto's alters as individuals, all es does through their labelling of mikoto with DID is 'uncover' a 'truth' about mikoto and act accordingly, as one should.

in my opinion, having preconceptions about how one's self operates and would benefit from being treated, just because their symptoms correspond to a diagnostic label, is misguided and dehumanising to the mentally ill. more specifically to mikoto, i think these preconceptions have completely overridden any potential discussion about his themes, character influences, and the commentary on power dynamics, toxic social expectations, and coercive self-identification that Milgram provides.

mikoto is not just a character that suffers from the symptoms of DID. mikoto is, also, a highly socially conscious, adaptable, and vulnerable character, that is an expert at gleaning the expectations placed on him by those in power and authority, and conforming to them, to spare him from scrutiny and gain social benefits.

i believe mikoto's relationship to the label of DID and his 'systemhood' is less so about indicating his inherent state of being, and moreso a tool he adopts due to the social position he is placed in during Milgram, that he uses for his survival, and introjects to protect his self-image.

or: i believe mikoto actively responds to the label of DID as it is applied to him, gleans the social expectations of the label, and acts accordingly, introjecting a 'multiple' way of seeing his self as a way to make sense of his inner turmoil, and playing the cards he is dealt socially, taking advantage of the audience's preconceptions around those with DID to help him avoid responsibility for his acts.

enjoy the read. i have a lot to cover.

main body 1: culture and conformity (quick section)

let's first put him into context.

being a person that suffers from a mental illness changes how you engage with the world.

not does being mentally ill mean you are considered to be atypical in how you view and interact with the world, with that difference causing impaired functioning and disruption to your health, but being mentally ill also impacts how others and wider society treat and value you, and subsequently how you treat, see, and value yourself.

in many societies, including japanese, having mental illness is a source of shame. because being considered mentally ill - having impaired functioning - involves the inability to fulfil an expected societal role or conform to societal and social expectations, being labelled as and functionally mentally ill often reaps the consequence of being unable to fit into society: being ostracised, being deemed an 'other', a worthless human, and/or a threat.

under the threat of ostracisation from their societies, and in the avoidance of shame, many people, such as mikoto, value their social roles, and have strong ideas about how they 'should' act and how they 'should' progress through life. should they struggle with their mental health, or otherwise feel that they are not acting or existing as they 'should', many will do anything in their power to maintain the illusion of functioning and normalcy, sacrificing their wellbeing in private and repressing any parts of themselves that they deem socially unacceptable.

mikoto, on practically every level in his life outside of Milgram, is not in a position to engage with the notion of being nonconformist. there is too much at stake for him, in his livelihood, his social position, his familial responsibilities, and his self-image.

it has been, and continues to be, vital for mikoto's survival that he stick to his established social role and conform to any social expectations placed on him, even if it causes him harm, because by aligning himself with the expectations of those with power over him, he can expect those in power and authority to favour (or overlook) him, helping him avoid scrutiny, shame, and the loss of everything he has sacrificed for.

this approach to navigating the world is ingrained in mikoto, and brings us the mikoto we encounter in Milgram.

main body 2: mikoto and social expectations

milgram.jp/character/mikoto (Profile): 常識人なりに常に状況に対して順応しようとしている。 tl: "A sensible* person who is always trying to [adapt/conform/acclimate/accomodate] to whatever the situation is." By "sensible", it means acting in accordance with prudence and propriety with the mores. (@milgram-en)

mikoto is first introduced to us by emphasising how 'normal', average, and "sensible*" he is, and the fact he is a man that is "always trying to [adapt/conform/etc.]" to the situation at hand, conveying how attuned and aligned he is to social expectations. he also describes himself along these lines, emphasising his desire to be seen as a conformist and non-objectionable individual.

outside of the impression of normalcy he intentionally gives us, it is also likely that mikoto genuinely sees himself in this way, due to his own avoidance and a psychological need to protect his sense of self. (I speak in this essay about mikoto's relationship to shame.)

mikoto's desire to be seen and see himself as non-objectionable extends to a pathological degree; he displays a severe disconnect from unacceptable parts of his identity (such as his ever being angry before) that instead manifest in his dissociative parts,

he appears to / acts as if he has have no memory of his murder, and violent outbursts,

my friend pointed out that the dream imagery in MeMe and Double may be suggestive of his derealisation (it may imply he does have memory of his murders, but it feel so unreal and foreign to him that he can only feel that it must have been a bad dream he had),

and when pushed on the matter that he may be a murderer and have just forgotten, he has a panic attack, and his normative parts are forced to switch out and disengage, ensuring his dissociation from everything unacceptable about him, including the fact that he is a murderer, remains intact.

these traits mikoto has early on in Milgram are indicative of the person he has developed to be as a result of his upbringing and sociocultural influences. his social expectations outside of Milgram, to name a few, are to be operational, obedient to authority, and to conform. he cannot be, and therefore 'is not', strange, abrasive, mentally ill, or a murderer.

however, Milgram itself is a society in a sense, with its own social expectations, norms, and statuses. in John Doe, mikoto's insistence on his normalcy is rejected, due to being incongruent with the reality of Milgram, that denotes that he is a murderer. es attempts to force mikoto to acknowledge the reality of Milgram, and although he initially shuts down, dissociates, and is forced to switch, mikoto's resistance to the label of murderer is a losing battle, and he knows it.

milgram.jp/character/mikoto (Profile): 夜中になってもミコトの監獄からは物音がするため、いつ寝ているのかがわからないと囚人の間で話題。 tl: "There are noises coming from Mikoto's prison even in the middle of the night, and the prisoners say they have no idea when he is asleep."

moreover, mikoto is attuned to the rising realisation that something is not right, and that others are becoming concerned about and afraid of him.

since the negative reputation mikoto gains in Milgram amongst his fellow prisoners would seem to be about the seemingly aggressive actions of his other parts (such as breaking things in his room while having meltdowns, defending himself against kotoko, and being judged unforgiven in Trial 1 following his (俺) violent outburst), mikoto likely feels he is not able to smooth this negative reputation over with his normative and passive demeanour alone, and likely feels very out of control of his circumstances, reputation, and self overall.

all of these indicate to mikoto that he is in a new, strange place, removed from his ordinary life, with a new authority (the word of the warden) to conform and appeal to, lest he ostracised, punished, scrutinised, and have his ego shattered.

and interestingly, while he persists in being unable to integrate with his sense of self the idea that he is a murderer or commit violent acts, at the very end of John Doe he is bestowed a diagnostic label, that is then proposed to and adopted by Milgram's figure of authority. this label he finds applied to him is one that carries a preconceived notion around his personhood, and may just free him from having to challenge his fragile self-image, and instead blame everything unexplainable about him on an external force, if he just plays along.

main body 3: mikoto and the label of DID

at the end of John Doe, and following mikoto's (俺) switch and violent outburst at es' prodding, kotoko armchair diagnoses mikoto with DID.

(at the beginning of Trial 2, Milgram (through jackalope) would seem to have confirmed this to be an accurate assessment, but in my opinion that's neither here nor there; just because he 'has' a disorder, does not make him an expert in it, necessarily honest about his symptoms, or immune to playing up his presentation for social benefits or because of outside influences that coerce how he conceptualises himself in light of the label.)

when understanding what this act of labelling could mean to him, it's important to establish that, up to the beginning of Neoplasm, mikoto himself seems to a) not be aware that this is a condition he suffers from, and b) only really have a surface level knowledge of what DID is. he asks es about basic functions of and theory around the condition, and even confesses that in es' shoes, he would have assumed someone claiming to have DID was a liar trying to dodge responsibility.

that is to say, from the moment he realises this is a label being applied to him, the only real information he has about what this label means and what his social position is now is lifted directly from what es tells him, and what we, as the audience (that he hears as 'voices' between Trial 1 and 2) apply to him. which is great for me. what a controlled environment to analyse.

in my opinion, the earliest point that mikoto may have realised the DID label / model was being applied to him, is at the end of John Doe. even implicitly, es introduces to mikoto the concept of there being 'another him' or some 'outside' force within him.

even earlier than that, kotoko very powerfully controls the audience's eventual discourse around how we should be thinking about him in light of the diagnosis. by directly tying the label of DID she applies to him to an abstracted debate about culpability in patients with DID, the status of 'person with DID' mikoto gains fundamentally becomes a question of if he should be 'let off' for his actions because of it. therefore, Milgram ensures that a leading debate when it comes to mikoto and his diagnosis is the possibility of being forgiven because it was not 'actually him' that commit those acts.

(i'm not sure where to fit this, but i do want to comment on the violence of applying this stigmatised diagnosis to him so carelessly and without his consent, and especially encouraging es to see him accordingly as a 'case' of DID ('real multiple personality disorder patient'), thus dehumanising him by transforming him into an abstract thought experiment. i personally think it's abusive and prejudiced to act like his personhood and manner of existing is for an authority to 'other' and define; despite his dissociation, mikoto does not express a desire to be seen as multiple alters until it becomes strategically useful, and i genuinely believe that applying the label of DID, and thus the model of 'systemhood'/'multiplicity' onto him, without his consent, is abusive and prejudiced. i believe any person's decision to see and express themselves as a 'system' of multiple selves must be done on their own accord and for their own benefit, and not because they are pathologised and somehow deemed inherently 'different' as a human being. ok, i just wanted to say this.)

all this to say, between Trial 1 and Trial 2, at the same time that mikoto is coping with and trying to make sense of this traumatic and strange situation, feeling out of control of his circumstances, reputation, and self, he is persistently hearing the audience discuss the notion that there could be 'another him' responsible for all his intolerable acts, behaviours, and personality traits, as well as the idea that this 'other him' is also 'not him', and that it is a possibility they may not hold mikoto responsible for the actions and existence of the 'other him'.

it has been, and continues to be, vital for mikoto's survival that he [...] conform to any social expectations placed on him, even if it causes him harm, because by aligning himself with the expectations of those with power over him, he can expect those in power and authority to favour (or overlook) him, helping him avoid scrutiny, shame, and the loss of everything he has sacrificed for.

as i've established, mikoto has a narrow self image. he is avoidant to acknowledging distress and possesses a psychological need to protect his sense of self and appear normative, functional, and socially acceptable, which he does by disowning parts of himself and dissociating.

not only is it helpful for him to play the cards he's dealt and adapt to the position he has found himself in to curry the favour of those in power (because frankly, weakly and confusedly resisting es' assertions of his identity as a murderer due to his normative parts' narrow sense of self is draining and triggering to him, and getting him nowhere in terms of Milgram), but i cannot emphasise enough how subconsciously appealing of an explanation it must be to him, to imagine that everything he has psychologically disowned actually 'isn't him', and therefore an aspect of his self he does not have to face responsibility or consequences for.

that is to say, although he truly suffers from DID and has truly dissociated from parts of his self so much that he cannot and refuses to recognise them as himself, because kotoko evokes the common and 'othering' misconception that alters are discrete and autonomous (and opens the debate about the possibility of not holding one responsible for the acts of the other), the audience's debate encourages mikoto to adopt the belief, outlook, and strategy that his alters are 'different people', distinct from him, and solely responsible for the acts mikoto has dissociated himself from.

main body 4: introjected stigma and self-conceptualisation

while i think on a lot of levels, mikoto conforms to the DID status as a tool for his Trial 2 interrogation, it is still worth noting that as a vulnerable person with a socially reliant sense of self, mikoto is vulnerable to introjecting stigma and negative conceptions around the mentally ill, and applying them to himself, which negatively impacts on his self-image.

date: August 5th, 2024 (Kazui's Birthday)

even without es' presence to perform to and gain benefits, as Milgram progresses, mikoto appears to slowly grow to worry about himself and genuinely start to believe he is unpredictable and violent, thus seeking to isolate himself from others. he also demonstrates the assumption that kazui is in touch with the social consensus that there is something scary or strange about mikoto, and expects kazui to treat him and think about him accordingly.

AMANE: ...Who are you? How intriguing. Are you saying you are not Mikoto Kayano? MIKOTO: Ha- You're asking who am "I"? That's what "I" wanna know. Whoops, don't come any closer. I'm in a rebellious phase and there's no guarantee I won't kill you, brat [kid] or not. Just leave quietly.

date: October 6th, 2024 (Mikoto's Birthday) (source)

mikoto, later, also directly engages with the social consensus that there is something strange and scary about him. during his birthday interaction, mikoto (俺, it would seem, or at the least an 'other mikoto' that uses this personal pronoun, given that's what's written) actively portrays himself to amane as 'not mikoto' — a violent and unpredictable undefined existence, that people should stay away from, and reinforcing his established negative social perception.

this is in line with mikoto's growing internalised belief that, due to his (or, in having) mental illness, he is violent and unpredictable. as ore (俺)/'not mikoto' he is also able to engage directly with this introjected belief, and actively portray himself according to how he believes others see him, to reinforce that status for his goals. for this circumstance, his goal appears to be - again - to isolate himself, because he believes that there is something wrong with him, and believes that he may become violent for no reason, something he does not want to have happen. thus he threatens amane, reminding her of his poor reputation, and 'protects' her from himself.

(note: i am calling his belief that 'he is volatile' an introjected belief, and not entertaining the idea that he is just being honest about his own violent impulses, because despite his negative reputation, mikoto (regardless of self-state) has never demonstrated that he is someone who becomes violent 'for no reason'. in my opinion, by warning amane to stay away for her own safety, he demonstrates that he does not want to hurt her. moreover, the only fights he has engaged with were explicitly in self-defense: kotoko in physical self-defense (although is unaware of this context and attributes it to sleepwalking, furthering his belief he gets into violent situations without his control and unprovoked), and es in psychological self-defense, only after being pushed far further beyond his mental limits than any other prisoner.)

another goal in this interaction with amane could also be, in my opinion, the desire to protect himself through self-isolation. because mikoto is vulnerable to social scrutiny and shame, and feels as if he can't control his acts or how he is seen, it would make sense that he therefore strives not to be seen by or interact with anybody, allowing him to maintain at least some amount of control over his selfhood and the way he is seen. thus, just like his interaction with kazui, mikoto (俺) plays the cards he has been dealt to his advantage, and reminds others of his negative social perception, to secure a relative social safety in being isolated.

i also think it's worth commenting on the dimension of mikoto (俺) in this interaction being 'not mikoto', and the psychological and social advantages of playing into a sense of DID/multiplicity. i think a major aspect for how mikoto internalises the DID label and sense of an 'other mikoto', is because by cementing a 'not mikoto', it helps mikoto scapegoat his undesirable traits onto an 'other'.

when it comes to mikoto's (俺) warning to amane while he emulates the outcasted and rough social role he perceives as having, framing himself as 'not mikoto' allows him to act in the way he does to protect himself & others, without challenging his strong sense of what 'is' mikoto (ie. socially conscious, innocent, conformist, sensitive). thus, mikoto (俺) does what he needs to do, and by psychologically removing his self from the act, protects his ego and preserves - at least to him - the illusion of normative 'mikoto'.

moreover, it is likely his (俺) sense of being 'not mikoto' is also a genuine dissociative feeling he has. because 'mikoto' is a narrowed identity that has disowned the majority of his own personality and humanity, and the traits and manners of existing contained in the 'other mikotos' are disallowed from being 'mikoto', it does beg the question to every other part of him of who they 'are'.

in my experience, drawing attention to (or god forbid, reinforcing) identity alteration/confusion makes it worse. therefore, i can believe that while in previous dissociative episodes mikoto has similarly felt 'altered' and 'not like himself', without the social pressure of Milgram and a preoccupation with the notion of having other selves (instead being preoccupied with his conformist identity and life responsibilities), he did not dwell on it, and quickly lost connection entirely with the instance in which he felt strange (either through estrangement and brushing it off, or forgetting it altogether).

in contrast, because in Milgram, DID and mikoto's strangeness is made to be at the forefront of his mind, the dysphoria inducing differences between what he thinks 'he' is like and what he is actually like become amplified. mikoto has likely become more alert to his idea of his 'self' and his manners of existing, leading him to more easily feel strange and 'out-of-character' for minor ways in which he does not conform to his narrowed sense of self, which leads his ostracised parts to properly notice and be affected by their exclusion from mikoto's accepted sense of self. thus, they perceive themselves — and begin expressing themselves — as unexplainable, disowned, existences.

date: October 6th, 2023 (Mikoto's Birthday)

mikoto also directly confronts the idea that there is 'another him' during his 2023 birthday timeline conversation, and we even get to see two sides of him express their personhoods in opposition to one another.

i think this exchange really demonstrates how mikoto uses a sense of multiplicity to cope with his own shame and his fears around feeling out of control. by splitting himself in two, mikoto can both blame 'himself' for his traumas and social ostracisation, expressing his internalised shame and self hatred, while also preserving 'himself' as an innocent victim and externalising his grief.

the beginning of this interaction is, explicitly, because mikoto 'comes around' to the model of multiplicity people have forcibly applied to him. with it in mind, 'mikoto' makes sense of everything that has caused him grief and blames it on the 'other him'.

specifically:

1. 'mikoto' blames the 'other him' for ripping his clothes: specifically, he blames the 'other him' for ripping his straitjacket he wears into t2 that, we can infer from the shreds, had incredibly long sleeves and bodice, and was likely used to restrict his movement and possibly restrain him.

therefore, while 'mikoto' blames the 'other him' for for the frightening state of his clothes, in context, mikoto's act to tear his clothes was one of resisting oppression. it was probably also an act of expressing more than a little rage at the injustice mikoto is facing in being incarcerated and abused.

'mikoto' does not acknowledge or sympathise with this context, and whether 'mikoto' is psychologically aware of this context to the 'other his' actions is unclear. it is possible his distress about his ripped clothes, and why he lashes out at the 'other him' for doing that, is because he is so dissociated that he is genuinely unaware of why he did this, and is frightened by the unexplainable and feeling out of control.

i think it's also possible that even if mikoto was aware of why he ripped up his straitjacket, he would not have sympathised with his past decision, and would still have verbally abused himself for acting out of line. because ripping the straitjacket is an act of resisting oppression — not conforming to his social position and submitting to authority — 'mikoto' likely finds it an unacceptable and dysphoric act. moreover, because ripping the straitjacket is more than likely an expression of rage, an emotion 'mikoto' does not allow him to express as 'himself' (and likely feels he has no experience with, as 'himself'), this goes doubly.

2. 'mikoto' also blames the 'other him' for scaring the others in the prison. i will assume this is referring to the loud noises he makes at night, the destruction of his property he does when angry, and the fight he gets into with kotoko.

(this timeline conversation takes place before the previous two i analysed, so i'll assume he hasn't began performing his 'othered' identity yet, in frightening others to protect them/himself. although, i have already covered why i believe he does this, and it's hardly malicious, so it wouldn't effect things either way.)

while it's understandable why mikoto and his fellow prisoners find mikoto's nightly crash-outs to be extreme, it's worth bearing in mind that not only is he having his rights abused, in a traumatic and triggering situation, and the only property he destroys is his own and in his own room, with no risk of anyone being caught in the cross-fire, mikoto does not have — and has never had — any healthy coping mechanisms for his anger outside of repression.

it is likely mikoto has no idea how to deal with overwhelming emotions, which not only makes them feel bigger and compound over his lifetime (as all he does is repress them, put them into a box for later, and act as if they do not exist), but also means that any time he does express them, it's not exactly in socially acceptable ways.

regarding his fight with kotoko, she explicitly attacks him first, and it seems it was only because he was 'ready' that he was able to hold his own and not be knocked unconscious (or worse, if you look at how mahiru ended up at her hands) like he was in John Doe. i think it's fair to say that any negative reputation mikoto receives for this scuffle is unfair, as is blaming an 'other mikoto' for 'scaring people' through it.

(it's also possible mikoto only perceives that people are scared of him because of his scuffle with kotoko, because he is projecting his own anxiety. it's entirely possible people are only scared of him because of the strange noises coming from his room, and his increasingly haggard demeanours, odd behaviour, self-isolation, and the fact they knew kotoko made an attempt on their life simply worries them, in a way they do not know how to approach. regardless of the reality though, he thinks others are scared of him, and punishes himself accordingly.)

thus, once again, 'mikoto' finds his — absolutely understandable, and often justifiable — expressions of anger and engagement in violence either unexplainable and frightening, or dysphoric and unacceptable, leading him to lash out to the 'other him' that he dissociates from, and that he associates with these acts.

'mikoto' also blames himself and his expressions of unacceptable emotions and behaviour for the abuse he is currently suffering within Milgram ("it's your fault things have become like this"). this is consistent with how mikoto has been conditioned throughout his life through his culture, to perceive any punishment, scrutiny, and inability to survive an unjust system as a flaw from within himself.

(this outlook also functions as a coping mechanism: by always finding the blame in himself, mikoto helps himself feel that he has control — believing that if he just does everything right, everything will turn out ok — saving him from the despair of acknowledging that social systems are often unfair, and pointlessly cruel.)

'mikoto' eventually receives a reply to his self-blame and verbal abuse after he begins to shout, with his 'other self' (who writes his personal pronoun as 俺 for this exchange) defending his actions (or the actions he identifies as having done) on the basis that he did it for 'mikoto'.

notably, mikoto (俺) never protests being blamed in itself, demonstrating that even in the parts of him that can stomach identifying with his deemed unacceptable acts and expressions, he universally lacks the self esteem to defend himself or consider it an injustice to be shamed. he also likely doesn't protest being blamed because the scapegoating of an 'other mikoto' is a source of stability for mikoto that allows normative 'mikoto' to be preserved, and thus is not a notion mikoto is willing to challenge; even if this had been a part that was willing to protest injustice, he cannot conceptualise doing so at normative 'mikoto's' expense, and also possibly cannot perceive injustice if it is at normative 'mikoto's' hands.

the interaction ends with 'mikoto' seeming to not hear mikoto's (俺) defense, and instead opting to stop thinking about this all. i personally read this as normative 'mikoto' being physically unable to process mikoto's (俺) response and dissociating very severely upon receiving one, demonstrating that normative 'mikoto', unlike his other selves, cannot directly behold his 'other selves' and parts, as they are so threatening to normative 'mikoto's' self image and enforced illusion of normalcy that characterises this part of him. therefore, it is likely that the maximum extent to how normative 'mikoto' can engage with the notion of DID / having other selves at this point, is, at best, to engage with them as an abstract concept and 'other', for the sole purpose of psychologically scapegoating.

to conclude this section, i have demonstrated that:

as a result of the rising sense that something is 'not right' with him, social sensitivity to his negative reputation, and the concept introduced to mikoto of there being 'another him' who could be held uniquely responsible for perpetrating his unforgivable acts, mikoto begins to psychologically split himself apart. he finds that he can only tolerate the reality of his situation so far, and although he is 'aware' that others are afraid of him and that he has done certain frightening things, due to his narrow and fragile normative self-image that he has cultivated to maintain his own acceptability and an illusion of control over himself, he finds himself drawn to the explanation of there being an 'other him'. from there, mikoto scapegoats all his intolerable acts and traits onto this unexplainable, abstract figure, who he feels — expressing his own intolerance towards himself — deserves to be shamed, blamed, and needs to stop doing the 'awful things' he does immediately.

in response to his new split self-perception and his preexisting complexes and weak sense of self, mikoto begins to consider himself an 'other mikoto' or 'not mikoto' whenever he finds himself in a self-state that acts or operates beyond his normative, tolerable, persona. as these newly mentally defined parts, he encourages his own psychological splitting and scapegoating, and comes to shoulder unique responsibility for his intolerable acts as his 'other selves', allowing him to maintain the security and purity of his normative persona, despite how Milgram persistently forces him to engage with an intolerable reality that would challenge it. due to natural differences between normative 'mikoto' and his 'beyond normative' self-states in what they can tolerate and engage with, mikoto (in his 'other' states) also finds himself interacting with his perceived negative social reputation, and occasionally leans into an 'othered' persona, portraying himself how he believes others see him (and how he has come to believe he 'is') — shameful, uncouth, and at risk of becoming dangerous, unprovoked — to protect himself, and others, from himself.

in this way, social stigma around mental illness, mikoto's poor relationship to himself, and the label of DID that Milgram introduces to him (the notion of there being an 'other him') drastically changes how mikoto conceptualises himself, and shapes to a massive extent how he comes to cope with Milgram — a new, traumatic and stressful society that he has found himself in.

main body 5: DID as a social tool

as established in section 3, the label of DID when applied to mikoto is fundamentally a thought experiment posed towards the audience about the culpability of persons with DID. as explored in section 4, due to the audience's suggestions and his own complexes, mikoto has begun psychologically dividing himself from the acceptable, innocent parts and unacceptable, guilty parts.

while, as mentioned in section 4, normative 'mikoto' seems unable to directly behold his 'other selves', and can only briefly entertain the thought as an abstract concept before shutting down — mikoto's 'other selves', already on the exiles of his identity, have no such phobia of the intolerable or enforced normalcy to sustain. thus, they can engage with, and negotiate according to, the model of DID and multiplicity that has been applied to them, directly.

in Neoplasm, ore (オレ) engages directly with the notion of there being an 'other mikoto', in order to scapegoat 'himself' for mikoto's crimes. this not only allows himself to protect himself psychologically, preserving an illusion of normalcy and innocence for normative 'mikoto' and encouraging Milgram to cease attacking his sense of self (instead bringing all the heat to the 'other him'), but is also vital for securing a forgiven verdict for himself, that ensures his physical safety and, hopefully, ultimate survival and freedom from Milgram.

compared to John Doe, where mikoto (俺) switches in under immense emotional pressure, and never identifies himself as 'not mikoto', when switching in Neoplasm, mikoto (オレ) makes a point to draw attention to his change in personhood. he does this by responding to es' comment about his switch roughly, openly reacting to es as if he's only just laid eyes on them in a while, and immediately, suddenly, alluding to the events of the 'other mikoto' in John Doe.

all these choices communicate to es, and reinforce the idea that, mikoto is no longer 'himself'.

after mikoto (オレ) conforms to the stereotyped, expected behaviour of a person with DID (that, honestly, even mikoto is probably aware of: change your demeanour, say hi, it's a new guy) and alerting es to the presence of a different alter, es attempts to adapt to the situation according to how one may engage with a 'case of DID'.

in light of common preconceptions around DID, es demonstrates the assumption that mikoto's alter would have a unique name and personhood (or at the least, expresses the desire to assign mikoto's alter a name, as to distinguish him from 'actual/normal mikoto').

mikoto (オレ) demonstrates a consciousness about his social standing and the absurdity of the situation he has found himself in, reacting with surprise and suspicion that es is taking this turn of events so easily, and then attempts to gauge how much es actually believes what is going on. this is a very good and socially-conscious move — it would be incredibly embarrassing and ineffective to continue if the warden was only entertaining what they thought was a blatant lie.

despite mikoto (オレ) making a direct reference to malingered DID and its infamy in cases where people fake the condition to try and escape responsibility for murder, es' response assures mikoto (オレ) that, because they have decided he is an 'authentic case' according to jackalope's judgement and the consensus of the audience, it has never crossed their mind that he may still use its social status and misconceptions around it to his advantage.

which is fucking awesome for mikoto; he has just confirmed that whether or not he 'has' DID or has an 'other self' is not up for argument. now all he (オレ) has to do to secure his physical and psychological safety, is find a way to convince the warden that everything was 'not mikoto's' fault.

despite the fact that mikoto (オレ) expresses no desire to be named anything unique (having already dodged the question once), and immediately complains about the name he is given, refusing to affirm it, es insists on naming mikoto (オレ) 'john'.

in the act of giving mikoto (オレ) a distinct name, es draws a binary in mikoto, and creates the illusion of discrete personhood between mikoto's alters, borne from their, and the audiences', rudimentary misconceptions around DID. moreover, as my friends have pointed out, by assigning him a western name, typically reserved for animals and (in being derived from 'John Doe') things that are 'unknown', es cements the sense that mikoto (オレ) is an 'other' — whether that be not japanese (not aligned with their cultural values, ideals, and society), not human (but an animal, pet, or beast), or dubiously existing or definable at all. this, again, opposes mikoto (オレ) with his normative, conformist identity, reinforcing mikoto's dissociative ostracisation, and the sense, for the audience, that mikoto exists as a binary 'system'.

mikoto (オレ) is not pleased about this development initially, due to, presumably, not actually having a particularly distinct sense of self as an alter, and probably feeling pretty insulted by the name choice. however, es' decision here to personify 'john' and crystallise the sense that the 'other mikoto' is his own distinct being who contrasts mikoto, later becomes vital for mikoto's (オレ) negotiations, and is also crucial for crystallising mikoto's reception as a 'system'. so, thanks, es. this is a surprise tool that will help us later.

mikoto (オレ) first draws a direct parallel between himself and his normative self when musing to es about how frequently he has found himself in his 'other' states, being unable to exist in his normative selves due to the psychological damage of Milgram (that accuses him of murder, seeks to restrain him, and has him finding himself doing unacceptable acts, such as lashing out against injustice). thus, the first time mikoto (オレ) reinforces the binary between 'himself' and his normative selves is to frame 'his' continued existence, to es, as a threat to 'mikoto's'.

personally, i believe this is a genuine anxiety mikoto has: mikoto wants to be his normative selves, he wants to maintain a sense of normalcy, live a safe and unobjectionable life, and he feels ashamed and monstrous when he acts out of line from that. i find it likely that mikoto genuinely finds it distressing that he has so often not 'been' or felt 'right' since the unforgiven verdict, and is afraid he may lose himself forever if Milgram persists.

i also find that, by drawing attention to this dynamic, mikoto (オレ) presents getting 'rid' of himself (オレ) as a dire priority, and encourages the warden — who will hopefully be forgiving mikoto at the expense of 'john' — to act fast in making their decision, freeing mikoto from his emotional turmoil as soon as possible. he makes sure the warden is aware that under any more pressure, the illusion of normative 'mikoto' will be shattered forever; mikoto is on the verge of breaking, becoming unable to know who he is, know how to live, or know how to cope with his acts and existence.

or, in split-personality stereotyping terms, mikoto will 'disappear', and only 'john' will be left.

which, in the eyes of practically everybody involved, is not an ideal outcome.

after asking es about a basic function of DID — what causes a dissociative separation between self-states — mikoto (オレ) ponders on why he (オレ) exists and has been himself (オレ) so often, and naturally begins to allude to 'mikoto's' distress at being persecuted for crimes he does not remember, rationalising that this is why his normative self has not felt conscious lately.

i feel that the way in which he expresses his relationship to his crimes ("the person in question...") draws attention to the unique selfhood of 'mikoto-who-does-not-remember', and conveys it at a distance, reinforcing both the idea that normative 'mikoto's' self has nothing to do with his murderous acts, and that this self is estranged from the mikoto that is speaking.

(according to my friend, the incredibly objective way he speaks here almost makes him sound like a defense lawyer (or other third party) representing his client. this tone and framing of his selves helps mikoto create the illusion that ore's (オレ) assessment of his normative self can be trusted — it's generally a lot more convincing to say somebody else didn't do it than that 'you' didn't do it — and discourages es from interrogating (attacking) his normative self any further, as he has a reliable, compliant, and well-spoken 'representative')

in light of ore's (オレ) compliance and confident, seemingly trustworthy assessments of his normative self, es seems prepared to take mikoto's words as the truth. and psychologically, i find it pretty understandable why they do.

in my opinion, the bulk of es' struggles with mikoto in John Doe can be attributed to that fact that es clings to a universal truth that Milgram is 'just' and does not make mistakes. es trusts that Milgram would not have brought in mikoto had he not commit murder, and uses this belief as the basis of their interrogation. however, mikoto is unable to face this fact; the universal truth he clings to in opposition to es is his normative reality and sense of self. therefore, during the bulk of John Doe, mikoto stubbornly resists es' notions, es stubbornly resists his, and they find themselves at a standstill and conflict. both parties find themselves unable to reconcile the facts that they respectively trust in, as they hold two contradictory realities.

however, if we are prepared to believe mikoto has different autonomous selves, this would seem to provide a new, seemingly logical answer as to why mikoto has found himself admitted to Milgram. through the explanation that it was another of mikoto's selves, Milgram was not 'wrong' that mikoto had commit murder, but mikoto himself also, strictly speaking, never acted out of line, as it was not really 'him'. in this way, Milgram's integrity is preserved, and mikoto's integrity is preserved as well. from es' perspective, ore's compliance and the reality he offers in Neoplasm is a breath of fresh air. the split-personality explanation works for them both.

from this proposed reality, es makes the assumption that if normative 'mikoto' had not commit the crime, it must have been 'john', the other self-state mikoto has that es has established for themselves in their mind. mikoto (オレ) agrees with this assumption when they query — notably, shockingly easily.

i find it makes a lot of sense that mikoto can make his 'confession' so matter-of-factly. after all, what mikoto so easily and remorselessly confesses to here ("ore ga bukkoroshita"), is not really a matter of any person's 'guilt' at all. as i've established, the personhoods of the other dissociated mikotos are largely defined by feeling like unexplainable, disowned existences that act as scapegoats and targets for shame and blame. therefore, there is not much emotional stake in this confession. mikoto, at best, feels that he is blaming a mere concept, and at worst, feels he is blaming an unexplainable plague within himself that is used to — and likely 'deserves' — being blamed.

instead, through his 'confession', what mikoto so easily and remorselessly provides to es, is simply the 'fact' that he has been insisting on from the start. he even makes a point to repeat himself, saying it in two ways.

"[this current existence, who is not mikoto] killed." and "[mikoto] didn't do it."

mikoto never really changes his story. he persists in clinging to his normative reality and self. what he does change, however, is his strategy and social performance, that he adapts as he gains a greater awareness of the position he is in and the expectations being placed on him. therefore, coming into Neoplasm, he advocates for his innocence not as stubborn, difficult, normative 'mikoto', who struggles to conform to the realities of Milgram, but instead from the perspective of a compliant, 'objective third party', who pitches an explanation for mikoto's circumstances that, largely, conforms to the warden's worldviews and beliefs.

in this way, mikoto adapts himself, and becomes and performs the perfect self suited for Milgram to secure his physical and psychological survival. mikoto conforms to everything: the expected and preferred behaviour (compliance, confession), the beliefs of the authorities around him (that Milgram is correct), and the assumptions of his personhood he finds applied on him (that he is volatile and aggressive, the rumours of DID and being multiple selves) and uses and conforms to them all to his advantage.

because by aligning himself with the expectations of those with power over him, he can expect those in power and authority to favour (or overlook) him, helping him avoid scrutiny, shame, and the loss of everything he has sacrificed for.

as he could expect — because he knows how the world works — by conforming and aligning himself with the expectations of those in authority, he is rewarded. mikoto is believed. mikoto is favoured. mikoto is overlooked. absolutely instantly.

es never questions mikoto's (オレ) 'confession', nor his weak and generic responses to being pressed for further details, nor really the logistics of a self-state alone committing murder. in fact, mikoto's (オレ) vague descriptions of his acts only seem to convince them further.

when es seems thoroughly convinced by the confession, mikoto (オレ) once again checks with where es is at with their ruling, allowing him to gauge his next course of action with his interrogation strategy. after learning that es believes the conventional approach to these situations would be capital punishment, mikoto panics (オレ).

(as per usual, this response is likely both because he (as a dissociated part of himself) genuinely feels mortified at the idea of his normative self being punished for things his normative self 'did not do' (despite the fact he only gets the impression he has an innocent, normative self because he has psychologically removed all his shameful acts from that mental construct), and because he would definitely rather not physically die or be punished as a human being — the ideal is that he is able to blame something that does not really exist or exists outside of him, to avoid taking responsibility and having to integrate or face his acts.)

in response to es' unresponsiveness to the notion that normative 'mikoto' should be let off and go unpunished if it was 'only ore's (オレ) fault', mikoto (オレ) begins spinning sympathy for his normative self.

first he (オレ) claims his normative self was 'asleep' for his murders, emphasising his uninvolvement, but also vulnerability. when that doesn't work, he (オレ) shouts at es to empathise with 'mikoto's' position, highlighting how pitiful, alone, well-behaved, and sensitive mikoto is, and frames him as a victim, highlighting how the cards were just all stacked against him.

mikoto (オレ) asserts that that 'he' has always done everything right, and that anything he didn't do right was never 'him'. he implies that the worst thing 'he' ever did was simply 'give birth' to his 'other self', and that even that wasn't his fault, and that 'he' never wanted, nor had control over, the acts he attributes to 'not-mikoto'.

he may or may not truly believe this. he may only emotionally believe it, or even just want to believe it. nonetheless, it's a convenient reality to propose.

in response to es buckling down about the conventional legal approach to these matters (and bringing attention to the fact that human life was lost), mikoto (オレ), in return, buckles down on his emotional argument and illusory binary, and pressures es to approach him as 'themself'.

i find that by drawing attention to es' judgement as an individual, rather than an agent of law, mikoto (オレ) forces them emotionally off-balance and distances them from their typical desire to be objective and ruthless as the warden, giving them an uncertainty they betray in the tone of their response. this plea also encourages es, in their emotionally vulnerable state, to approach him (or more specifically, the victimised 'mikoto'), in turn, as a person they've come to know and grown attached to, likely making them more sympathetic and prone to forgiveness to preserve 'mikoto's' wellbeing (consider how Milgram's audience generally buys the idea that mikoto is a helpless victim, and feel bad at the notion of voting him guilty, especially if that means that, as mikoto (オレ) alludes to earlier, normative 'mikoto' will vanish and only his 'other personality' will remain).

ultimately however, it's interesting to note that despite the fact that es is ultimately uncertain on any strong conclusion on if mikoto's account of events means mikoto should be forgiven (as this judgement is the audience's job), they are never seen to question — nor does Milgram encourage the audience to question — mikoto's binary, his claims that he was possessed by his other selves and unable to control himself, or his claims that his other selves are 'not him'.

this manner of approaching his crime — seeing him as a person who, somehow, operates fundamentally differently to others due to his diagnostic label — echoes the sentiment kotoko proposes when giving him the DID diagnosis in Trial 1. es even reiterates it, almost verbatim. however this time, because mikoto has been able to adapt to his circumstances, he has been able to use the Neoplasm interrogation to take control of, play up to, and reinforce the models applied to him as a prisoner and person labelled with DID to guide the audience's discourse around his crime, in his favour this time.

by echoing es' own language and using their preconceptions against them — calling himself 'john' for the first time when concluding his pitch and strategy for forgiveness — mikoto aligns himself with es' stigmas and belief that mikoto (オレ) is a distinct entity from mikoto that must (and can) be defined, and twists this to guide es' approach to judging, reinforcing the illusion that mikoto's acts were not perpetrated by himself.

mikoto (オレ) also calls back to his original plea to hurry the forgiven vote, begging es to forgive him so he can preserve his vulnerable normative 'mikoto' identity construct and save himself from having to challenge the illusion of his normative reality any further; mikoto wants to forget all this, go back to normal, and escape consequences for his actions, in a fight for his own self-preservation and due to his need to return to and function to act as part of society, where his societal- and self-worth lies.

i find it very compelling that mikoto's ultimate argument is to promise that if he is forgiven ore (オレ) will 'disappear', since i find that this argument echoes and manipulates how the insanity defense is constructed in certain parts of the world; he makes it out that he was not in control of himself and therefore cannot (or at least, should not) be held legally responsible or punished for his acts, but also that he does not have to be removed from society for being unable to be held responsible, because the mental illness that perpetrated those acts has been identified and is going to vanish imminently.

(this is another way mikoto's binary is practically and psychologically useful. by framing himself as only having two personalities, he makes it seem that by 'disappearing' his scapegoat part, mikoto will only have one personality left, making him be 'normal' again, not only no longer associated with a crime or poor behaviour, but also longer be mentally ill at all. this helps when it comes to the verdict — i'm sure some insane people saw ore (オレ) disappearing through magical lobotomy as a good thing and as his disorder and disruptive behaviour being 'cured' — and also helps mikoto cope with his selfhood, dissociating himself from all of this, labelling it as more-or-less outside forces that do not have to disrupt his sense of self.)

ultimately, mikoto, functionally, promises that from now on, he will always be in control like anyone else, and that he will now be normal, functional, and socially acceptable, like he 'always has been', and always strives to be, unwilling to acknowledge the extent of his self beyond his normative identity constructs, nor the damage that his intolerance towards himself has had on his mental health. based in his well-established dissociative coping mechanisms that have kicked into overdrive thanks to the stress and social pressures of Milgram, mikoto becomes increasingly desperate to entirely cut himself off from and dissociate from everything he cannot tolerate about his acts and that he hates about himself, and by conforming himsef to labels and statuses coercively applied to him, gauging the expectations of authority figures, and taking advantage of his social position to gain benefits, mikoto makes attempts to secure his safety to do so, successfully discouraging the warden and audience from interrogating and blaming 'him', and instead directing the heat and blame to an 'other', protecting himself from having to challenge his maladaptive, narrow sense of self, or bear the burden of responsibility for his crime that he cannot bear confronting.

conclusion / tl;dr:

mikoto is a highly adaptable, socially conscious character, who comes from a culture that values functioning, social cohesion, and conformity. due to how he has developed in his environment, mikoto finds himself prone to repressing and disowning parts of himself, including his anger, his socially unacceptable acts, his overwhelming internalised shame, the fact that he struggles with his mental health, and the fact that, under the pressure of his life and expectations, he commit mass murder, amongst other things. this leads him to display dissociative tendencies, such as feeling like he is 'not himself' at times, or that his acts were not perpetrated by 'him'.

upon being taken to Milgram, his illusory normative 'reality' that is phobic of all intolerable acts and parts of himself is challenged violently, and after being triggered very severely and voted unforgiven in the first trial, mikoto finds himself in a very vulnerable social and mental spot, and finds himself unable to maintain a sense for himself that he is normal and okay. this leads him to feel 'not like himself' a lot more often.

towards the end of the first trial, due to kotoko's suggested diagnosis in attempting to explain his strange behaviour, figures of authority around him (es and the audience) begin to apply the label and model of DID onto him. with this came the characters' and audience's stigmas, preconceptions, and preestablished narratives around DID, which, due to always reading the room and hearing the audience's voices, mikoto becomes attuned to, which influences his character development, self-image, and way in which he begins to understand and frame his crime to himself and others.

mikoto, as a socially vulnerable person with a weak sense of self, begins to introject narratives around himself, his suffering from mental illness, and his having DID, which impacts how he engages with the other prisoners (mainly by self-isolating and assuming they will be or should be scared of him), and relates to himself (wherein he begins to internalise a belief that he has other, uncontrollable selves that are dangerous and wrong, and shames and abuses them for being that way).

mikoto also, having internalised this, acts according to this way of understanding himself during his Neoplasm interrogation, and performs himself according to conventional understandings of overt personality switches to distinguish his 'other' selves from his normative, and uses his high social consciousness, responsiveness, and expectations es demonstrates according to their understanding of how he, as a 'person with DID', functions, to get them on board with the assertion that 'mikoto' should not be held culpable for his crimes, securing for himself a forgiven verdict in the attempt to protect his ego and allow himself to return to a normative reality in which he can feel like 'himself', and no longer have his selfhood attacked.

this strategy has the added benefit of reinforcing to mikoto his own desirable belief that the him that feels like 'himself' is truly innocent and unobjectionable, and that everything intolerable he has done and is that he been forced to face is 'not actually him', and will imminently vanish from his life, reassuring him that he may have a chance to escape Milgram physically and relatively psychologically unscathed, to continue self-destructing in repression and overwork, in peace.

in this way, mikoto's DID label, although abusively established and used to dehumanise him, becomes a valuable tool for getting himself out of a murder charge that he would otherwise not be able to bear confronting, or make a compelling argument to excuse himself for. by conforming to rudimentary understandings of DID and manners in which people with DID have been dehumanised, mikoto is able to present and see himself as a binary of selves, which becomes vital not only for protecting himself psychologically, but for convincing others that his psychological and coercively-applied-to-him binary is practical and 'real', allowing him to physically escape punishment and consequences for his acts, and assure himself and others that his other 'self' that he hates and blames for all his flaws and humanity, can be separated from him and 'vanished' for good.

epilogue / reflection

ooohhh my god. real ones know how much this essay made me want to die. i seriously didn't expect it to be so long i promise. i don't know what happened. it regularly brought me into fits of despair. but it's done. i'm glad i wrote it but i'm also so glad it's over.

i'm never writing on this dipshit again. sayonara you weeaboo shits.

(^ this is a joke. but i don't think i have anything else to say about him at the moment! i think this and my other essays really might be the vast majority of my views on his presentation. i'll probably have more to say come T3 but, for now, shrug.)

as always, please let me know if any of this is incomprehensible (whether thats grammar, my word choice, or my trains of logic). i am very happy to clarify and reword bits, it is important to me that my essays can be understood by anybody!

and, congratulations for finishing, you have read very almost 10k of non-stop mikoto analysis. go drink some water and take an eye break. please. for me. thank you!

[whileinthe80s]

THE OLD GUARD 2 ❤️‍🩹

First thoughts

I DON'T THINK I'LL EVER RECOVER FROM THAT ENDING IT FELT LIKE MY HEART STOPPED OR SOMETHING. That aside.I can say it was an overall enjoyable watch but that's not enough yall. Had to turn a blind eye on some major unsatisfying plot points. Im glad that everyone had a decent amount of time on screen. Not a lot of complaints there.

Booker dying was fucking horrible and Andy had to watch!!? that shit was heartwrenching, but it was totally expected from booker. I knew he was gonna pull some shit like that the moment he got that immortal lore from Tuah. It's sad to see booker go but he TRULY AND FINALLY made his choice. It would have been nice to see him take his time with it though. His reality to him was a hellscape so what he did feels fitting. It did feel a bit rushed (like every thing else in the movie) because its something I knew he would do but it really didn't have to happen so quick. Especially after they've decided to leave the story unfinished. Could've given the man some time with it.

Tuah is great. he's only really a segway for the immortal history plot line so that's about it.

JOE AND NICKY MY SWEET SWEET JOE AND NICKY.. I was honestly just extremely happy to see them again. Love that they were being goofy. Love that Nickys immediate instinct when Joe said he wanted to be alone was to follow him because he knew when he was hiding something. I think that's a nice little acknowledgement of they're centuries together because I believe if Joe was saying he wanted sometime alone to just be by himself nicky would know that too. (Nicky would probably also know that Joe would never even want such a thing as to "be alone" sooo). The conversation they had about them possibly ending was cool. Wish it was a bit longer though.( or its probably just me never having enough joexnicky). Them driving was HOT. Had to say it like damn.

ANDROMAQUYNH IS HEREE!!...I enjoyed their developments. Totally would have loved to see how Quynh navigated her rage if she hadn't immediately connected with Discord. But Discord found her so i guess that was never meant to happen. (Andy getting her immortality back is great and all now who's gonna give it to Quynh🫠. The whole transferring immortality thing is crazy af tbh.)

Discord feels a bit unfinished. Like how did she lose her immortality. The whole shift in the story of immortality itself is quiet unsteady tbh. Like do you only ever lose your immortality if you get wounded by the last immortal? If that's the case, Lykon???. Or is their initial concept of death coming unexpectedly to all living things still on the table and the thing with the last immortal just speeds up the process.

Nile is still cool af. Love to see her taking charge. Her finding a Weapon was cool!!. But again there really wasn't much room in the movie for any deep personal development moments. Something was always going on so we missed out on that from Nile aswell.

There's a lot left unanswered and the movie just ended at THE most worrying point. Really for a second thought i could see the fam in a happy ending (minus booker💔). They took that from us.

I'm just suppppper happy they're back. And I enjoyed it. I enjoyed the movie. Sure it has some rough edges and were allowed to be upset about these characters that we love but honestly I'm good. Our worst case scenario has been averted. It sucks that we've waited 5 years and now we have to wait again for god knows how long. ( maybe we won't even have to wait if neflix chooses to not renew it for a third🤡 but honestly who the fuck leaves a franchise like in a fully unfinished state. they MUST renew it right right right????!??!? can't even call it a cliffhanger its simply an unfinished story so they must.)

[eeveeintheroses]

Is Finnian connected to the Grim Reapers?

While watching Kuroshitsuji: Emerald Witch Arc, I noticed a significant change in Finnian's eyes. Since the beginning, his eyes had been a tealish green, only to grow greener as the show progressed. This was obviously due to an increase in budget and some slight alterations made to his character as the series progressed. It's a common enough thing in some shows.

What I noticed, however, was that in the current Emerald Witch Arc we are given more of his back story. He was a "prototype" for a potential super human experiment, only to end up having the scientists attempt to kill him upon being discovered by Ceil and Sebastian. While the other two "prototypes" were destroyed, Finnian managed to overpower the scientist and escape. His escape, however... was not what you would deem human - either super or otherwise.

[I tried to get an image of the escape from the anime but couldn't, so imagine the manga in full bloody colour.]

The way he crawled his way up the walls by his hands is almost demonic in a way, almost indicating that there was something supernatural involved in the experimentation. What's more, out of the "prototypes", he's the only one that seems to have green eyes. The other experiments have what is most likely blue or some other pale colour rather than the green that we know Finnian possesses - that or his eyes are suppose to be a dominating feature.

On top of that, whenever he gets in a "defense mode", his pupils dilate to the point that they resemble rings. Also, as the series has progressed and the budget increased, we see that they literally glow an eery green when in said "defense mode".

Specifically, they glow a bright green with faded rings.

Now who else do we know that has "phosphorescent, chartreuse-green eyes" that possess a glowing like appearance and even has some of the same teal in them?

Grim Reapers. Now I'm not saying that Finnian is a flat out grim reaper, but Finnain WAS injected with a lot of chemicals and other things when being experimented on. Hear me out. What if the scientists got ahold of Grim Reaper blood - possibly even supplied by the Undertaker (you know he'd be curious what the humans would do with it) - and in doing so gave Finnian some of the powers and strength of a Grim Reaper?

Another similarity is that all Grim Reaper's have garden themed scythes. Lawn mowers, chainsaws, hedge clippers - even the traditional Scythe was a form of harvesting/gardening tool.

And what is Finnian?

He's a gardener.

Maybe I'm way off the mark, but I think this would be an interesting character development for him, as well as an interesting comparison between him and Undertaker.

Both would be connected to grim reapers, both would be determined to try and give life - Finnian as a way to counter his destructive tendencies and Undertaker out of sheer curiosity- and both would have a Phantomhive heir who they are willing to protect no matter what. Real!Ciel with the Undertaker, and Our!Ciel with Finnian.

Anyways, what do you think?

[lewalrus]

A LONG post about Deadman on DS2

Okay, so as a Deadman fan, I thought I should write my thoughts on him on Death Stranding 2.

As you may imagine, there will be HUGE SPOILERS for the game, so if you haven’t finished it, please, I don’t recommend that you read this post (Be careful with the tags on this post too)

I also should warn you that I will yap about him A LOT because everything this man does is special to me <3

Alright, first of all, it was so weird and at the same time cute as fuck to see Deadman acting all happy and doing little voices on the first cutscene. I think I never saw Deadman laughing and smiling that much as he did on that scene. I really loved seeing him that cheerful!

(Sam genuine tiny smile at Deadman being all silly is going to be the death of me) It makes me sad that we only got to see him with his actual body at the start of the game :/

Anyway, about his discovering that he has a soul, a beach and dooms, I already talked about it on twitter, but I think I’ll elaborate here.

I didn’t like it at all… Not only because him not having a beach in the first game was what made his relationship with the beach concept very unique, since he was the only character that didn’t have a soul. But also because it wasn’t explored at all, it felt forced and completely out of nowhere. I think it would be better if he found out that he has dooms, but his dooms are different from the others and allow him to lend anyone’s beach, even if it’s only for a short amount of time, it could even work with his later plot in the game.

I also would rather if they had explored more the reason why Deadman was even born, it feels like a mystery that could tie very nicely into the Death Stranding universe, I’ve had this thought since the first one, that maybe Deadman was the result of an experiment to create artificial BBs, but it failed because those BBs ended up not having a connection to the beach. But I guess it is what it is. Alright, now I want to talk about, what I consider, the craziest plot twist about him.

DEADMAN WAS RED FUCKING SAMURAI!

As it is also stated on Deadman's entry on Corpus:

(I'll be calling Deadman affectionately "hulking red warrior" from now on)

Since the first time I saw Red Samurai, on the first chapter of the game, I knew Deadman had something to do with it! Honestly, I got pretty obsessed with this idea and started looking at hints on the parts that I already played so I wouldn’t spoil myself.

Needless to say that my head fucking exploded when I rewatched Deadman’s cutscenes and spot a bunch of Red Samurai’s bodies at the background! So maybe that means that Deadman also had created/modified Red Samurai and that it was planned by him to control it, the last part is pretty much canon because he put his body/head inside of it.

(Here, you can see Deadman's size when compared to the hanging bodies, the body under the black blanket is also huge, I believe that's the one Deadman ended up placing his body inside)

And the way it saved and protected Sam multiple times! God, every time Red Samurai showed up I would squeal like a little girl and pray that my theory that it was Deadman was right because I was developing a huge crush on that red warrior lol And oh my god if it wasn’t one of the most romantic things I ever saw, even after death, Deadman was there to save Sam (and the way he played the odradek’s lullaby to Sam after he saved him from Higgs before disappearing, as a way to say “it’s okay, the danger is gone, don’t worry” like Sam used to sooth Lou with the odradek HBUYGHIDBGIYDBGF holy shit I fucking love Deadman.) There’s another detail to it that I found quite peculiar. At some point before we find out that Deadman can possess Heartman too, Rainy makes this post on the social media of the game:

I didn’t really get it back then, but when I found out that Deadman has been using Heartman’s body during the 3 minutes that he is dead, everything made sense! It was Deadman using the VR training room but with Heartman’s body, that’s why Heartman doesn’t remember doing that training at all! So that means that Deadman is secretly super tough? Because apparently Deadman can fight very well even on a weaker body (at least if we compare Heartman to Red Samurai).

Makes me really wish that with the “making short work of them with his expert use of the katana” part of the Corpus’ entry is actually talking about Deadman’s skills with the katana, not the Red Samurai’s body skills. Maybe I’m just seeing things, but when I compare Red Samurai’s performance under Deadman’s control with it’s performance under Higgs’ control, the Red Samurai looks way more clumsy and weaker with Higgs than when it was with Deadman. The reason can very much be because while Deadman was controlling it, Red Samurai’s performance was only for scripted cutscenes, so he could be very tough to fight, but when it was under Higgs’ control, it was a fight that the game expected the player to win, so they made him weaker and easier, but I digress. After finishing the game and looking back into it, especially Deadman’s cutscenes, I think there was some more hints about him being Red Samurai, like Deadman’s ugly red tie (I’m sorry, it just doesn’t look well with his red shirt skajsia) and the scene where he plays with two finger puppets, maybe they were hinting that he would be able to use Heartman and Red Samurai as puppets later.

I honestly love the addition that Deadman is a fighter, but I think that as everything they added to him on the second game, it also should have been more explored, maybe even with some entries on the Corpus. Like, does Deadman can fight since always or he learned that during the months between DS1 and DS2? I really like to think that he learned to fight with the katana on his youth, but ended up putting the training aside to pursue a medical career, and that means that, on Cliff’s battlefield, he could have fought against Cliff to protect Lou instead of running away, but the only reason he didn’t was because very unfortunately he didn’t have a katana with him at the moment LOL (sounds hilarious in my head, sorry)

Anyway, I want to let you all know that I’ll be spamming this fandom with fanarts of Deadman with a katana because HOLY FUCK THAT MAKES DEADMAN EVEN HOTTER sikahsiasjasiuahs

[prismkat]

season one inho was so good because he was objectively evil and irredeemable but had full belief in the integrity of the games and insisted that they were fair. season three inho sucked because they completely disregarded his whole “the games should be fair” shtick and dropped in a newborn baby as a player and just made him a suck up. it would’ve been a much more interesting route to have inho serve the games, not the vips, causing a conflict of interest. even the things he does in season one are rooted in the game’s fairness. the glassmaker had an advantage, so the lights went off (though I don’t doubt it was partway to entertain the vips, however it stands that it was still unfair in inho’s eyes). minyeo didn’t get a partner, so she went back to the dorms. sure, marbles couldn’t be played with only one person, but season three inho was such a different character that had the game taken place in the third season i could see him forcing her to play anyway, leading to her inevitably dying at the end due to being unable to collect anyone’s marbles for the sake of entertainment. it would’ve been an interesting route given inho’s stance as a former player. even though he works for the games and the vips, he’s a former player first and foremost. he’s not on their level, and never will be. he’s just another pawn. and since he’s there because he does believe the games are something beneficial to the winners, he works to serve the games. i feel like it would have been a very interesting route to take. not only that, i feel like it could also spark up a side plot with the masked officer, seeing inho doing his job, technically, but not correctly. after all we all know that the system isn’t really intended to be fair or beneficial to the players. it’s meant to entertain. one thing that disappointed me in season 3 was how irrelevant the masked officer was. they dropped a bit of kidney lore and that was it. was it meant to be a parallel to inho? if so, they should’ve expanded on his character a bit more because that sucked. either way, a plot to take the role of the front man by the masked officer would’ve been really interesting, either it be for power or an attempt to fulfill his role better.

what i think inho’s downfall as a character was was the fact that i don’t think they could decide what to do with him. one moment, they’re making him sympathetic, expanding on him more and the reason he entered the games in 2015. the next, all of that is gone. one moment, he’s talking about how the games are supposed to be fair and hanging the people who disregard that as a warning. the next, we get a flashback of him winning the games by cheating, with zero explanation as to why he was chosen. one moment, we see him give a speech about fairness, telling gihun to think of it all as a dream, telling gihun he sincerely hoped he would’ve gotten on that plane, believing wholeheartedly the games are doing something good for people, regardless of who dies for that money. the next, it doesn’t matter because inho is fully aware that the games at its core are unfair and it doesn’t matter anymore about he and gihun’s ideological war, because he was aware it was bullshit the whole time apparently and his fairness speech in season one was… *checks notes*… pointless? one moment, he’s crying in the mirror after shooting his brother and the next there is no next moment because there’s no payoff to that clip. one moment he’s telling the captain “kill them all. including the detective” and the next the captain is saying “he told me to do whatever it took to keep you alive” with absolutely zero development in the hwang brother’s relationship that could explain or even imply why inho switched up that fast.

everything to do with inho in season 3 is inconsistent and wasted potential. and it took a lot of willpower inside me to write season 3 there and not season 2, given that season 2 was so, so interesting (that limo scene was peak cinema. “I’ll show you the world doesn’t always go the way you want it to.” in other words, “bring it on”, setting up for an interesting and spectacular war of ideologies between inho and gihun. only for them to speak for 2 minutes) however given that season 2&3 were filmed together, I’m struggling to accept that. knowing that the build up season 2 was giving was to … that. when I watched season 1, I didn’t like inho. he was evil. he was cruel. he served those disgusting VIPs. but I miss him. because at least season one inho was complex. complex as in, he’s evil. he’s awful. he serves a horrible system. but he believes in this system. believes it does something good. believes in it enough to shoot his own brother off a cliff to protect the games, to keep them secret, under lock and key. while his hands still shake the whole time.

unlike season 3 inho, who’s complex in the way that they couldn’t quite make up their mind on where to take his character, and ended up with a character who’s so close to being recognisable, and yet, not quite.

inho giving gihun the knife to protect the baby could’ve been so, so impactful as a representation of him disregarding the fairness of the games, the fairness that was never quite there to begin with. IF he hadn’t disregarded that fairness for the entire season.

rest in peace, inho and gihun’s ideological war. you could’ve been so, so interesting. instead we’re just left with cate blanchett playing ddakji in a random alleyway in LA.

[setcolder]

Reading the comments back and forths ITS SO INTERESTING and yes i agree with all of you.

An advance note: sorry that i barged in with discussion focused more on other ship than whats the original post is intending but i need to reblog it here since i got this revelation by reading the comments interpretation

Imyself come to a realization that shinran would actually be a MUCH MORE better ship if its canonically admitted their relationship are toxic

The way they've been portrayed as the perfect couple undermined the amount of lies they had between them. they're already an angsty couple to begin with, and its written very clear that that angst is build on how they're "distant" (bc ran things shinichi is away, while hes actually right beside her)

They clearly ignore how unhealthy the relationship was. If gosho had the balls and guts, how shinran would be written is full of bickering. Not just cute banters, but one that actually turned their relationship upside down.

When ran scold shinichi hes always away, it shouldnt have stopped there. She have to literally begs and blamed him. She HAVE to confront him. And this arise and/or stem from the fact that she got dysfunctional family.

Admitting that her dysfunctional family had an impact to her having abandonment issue and bravely wrote how toxic shinran relationship is, again, would actually made their ship BETTER.

This is only from ran's side. Shinichi side also bring a lot to the table by clearly writing how he views her as a world to come back to—an ambition he first had impulsively, full of anger and resentment when his life got flipped. And i quote the opinions on op's comments how conan grew his personality so much, so as extension, shinichi HAVE to be a different person. And this difference should've put their relationship MORE in danger

It's far more delicious if they have a big fight and does break up. I'm not even saying it out of malice. I'm a multishipper now, and i grew up with shinran. I literally spend big time enjoying dcmk since i was a child for shinran romance. But, really, if gosho stated clearly how toxic their relationship is and led them to a broke up, I'd ship them even harder LMAO it'd be a good plate like those out there of unhealthy relationships thats so fucked up but so interesting you cant help but be drawn into them.

The thing is, this is all just my input. And i notice very much the weakness in shinran writing is so stagnant that it becoming very flat. The way i made this paragraphs about what they could potentially be is a solid proof how flawed their writing is.

And i myself is pretty sure gosho wont take very drastic decisions like changing course of romance to coai. Its been 30 years and he doesnt have any revolutionary shift in this particular are of writing. Maybe if its another 50 years, it could change but i dont see it either. I feel like its been too long and too late for him to have some sort of meaningful choices put into canon. He shouldve done SOMETHING when its still hot. At least 10-15 years ago. Its just.... TOO late yk 😭 i dont really believe in him being that bold about it

Especially how, yeah, hes very flawed in writing female characters. The fact that coai managed to develop very naturally is to me an accident in a way like famous saying how "shonen writers accidentally create a phenomenal homoerotic relationship", do you get me?

All in all, despite the route gosho will take, coai baseline is already too strong to crumble. I never paid attention to coai before (not that i hate it, i simply never gave it too much thought) so i got surprised at how many dcmk staff supports them. I'm interested at one of the reply on op's comment stated that somebody should proofread gosho's romance. If a lot of staff likes coai and gosho is now beginning to realize their significance, what could be the IT factor that made gosho locked in?

I wonder if its affected by the fandom situation thats extended to real life harassment. If thats one of the reason, is it harder to change route since they need to, like, plan it systematically? Like dismantling the toxicness of extreme shinran fans by pulling legal actions?

Hope no shinran comes at me cause i myself still likes them (idk if theres dcmk shipwar in tumblr 😭), i just can see objectively that the criticism this ship receives are valid. I still fangirls to their dating in kyoto arc btw. I spend most of my life around dcmk when i was younger, so now that i matured i can see things i havent realized before (my tastes also changes by time, just like shinichi shouldve change when he lives his life as conan LOL)

Tl;dr i still have affection for shinran as they are my ship growing up, but now i enjoy coai very much and see how meaningful their relationship is. I wrote ahead on my twitter as i dive into coai posts:

I just got back to my fixation of dcmk, and i used to have similar scope of nostalgia everytime i came back in the past (mostly for the canon romance and my favorite mystery chapters i liked when i was young). So now that i see the potential of a lot of other character dynamics & relationship, it really feels like i consume this media for the first time. I feel like im being rebirthed HAHA

new ending dropped and i just about lost my mind