#scully’s abduction changes everything about the show but i don’t think i clicked until rewatching the way that mulder is never the same | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

carefulfears · 1 year ago

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a lot of these fans are scully hardcore fans who call mulder an asshole for fucking someone while scully is abducted and in danger and i’m like maybe let him have the one thing that makes him forget all this even for a split second and makes him stop the self flagellation for a moment ?? you know..

tbh i feel like kristen was kind of more an indulgence into self-hatred (and a sort of feeling of betrayal?) than anything else but i totally get what you’re saying anon and you’re so right like…omg…let me not speak…

#y’all remember that moment in 3 when the local police tells him to go to his hotel and sleep #and he says ‘i didn’t get a hotel. i don’t sleep anymore.’#it’s the way that he says in conduit that he’s ‘still walking into that room’ ‘every day’ of his life and he’s already so stuck #in THIS trauma and THIS loss and then it happens again bar for bar for bar.#scully’s abduction changes everything about the show but i don’t think i clicked until rewatching the way that mulder is never the same #he’s never as excited or as open or as trusting or hopeful again #this has ALREADY HAPPENED to him before!! and then it happens AGAIN!!#the thing about this show is that mulder will always be in that room and 12 years old and frozen and listening to #someone scream for him for help that he cannot help and will never be able to save #whether they’re screaming ‘fox’ or ‘mulder’ or ‘dad’#everything we do in this life we do over and over again etc etc #so anyway let him fuck the vampire GOD FORBID HE DO ANYTHING #asks #3 #‘i don’t sleep anymore’ AND HE NEVER DOES AGAIN!!#someone pointed this out before but mulder’s insomnia wasn’t this bad before scully went missing.#like you see him sleep (on the couch) pre-abduction pretty regularly but never really again

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