#scratch that. somebode FOR SURE MADE IT

[walkinaroundtheuniverse]

more Cat than a Man, that CatMan

so i love blondjow as any other cultured person, but, hear me out

he's actually a cat. always was, and now unfortunately isn't

and that's why he's so destructive, and mad at aizen

imagine, the tragedy of being turned from graceful and strong killing machine, literally natures favourite

into a hairless monkey

with a part of you made into a steel stick

(also! the predator! made into prey! the disgrace of this all! (imagine that as if an offended cat said it) )

So now, not only i look at Aizen and see a dude that mastered pokerface when all he did was "random bullshit go! (if something sticks, i'm saying it was planned (ekhm, White))"

But also the CatMan, actually a Cat, unfortunately, now a Man

(and playing loose with canon, i like to imagine, that from Adjuchas, his vasto lorde form would still be a cat. No "going to be more humanoid" shit. No, this is a cat. If every hollow is striving to be a vasto lorde, coz then you have more humanoid shape and feel a bit as in past, then, he being a cat, would mean he is gonna go back to being a cat)

And also the way his resurrection is him goin' partially back into cat form plssssssss COME ON, LET HIM BE A FURBALL

also it would be interesting. I don't think (don't know) if it was mentioned - any other, than human, soul turning hollow. So he would be speshial <3

that was me playing with canon, having watched it a long time ago and still not finishing the manga, don't take this seriously

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #307: METAMORPHOSIS

September, 1989

I don't usually root for Lava Men but nobody seems to want to make Gilgamesh interesting or put him in pants so yeah go ahead and crush him. Let's trade up for a better model.

I do suspect that Gilgamesh is getting the boot. Even though he's in the roster box, his name isn't included with the names above the title. Which I'm guessing are the mainstays despite the run having the premise that all Avengers are Avengers.

Anyway.

Last times on Avengers: Some stuff happened. And then the writer changed. Captain America declared that the Avengers would have a flexible roster of everyone. Also, some Lava Men hoisted Avengers Island and formed a big ball around the Avengers which then rolled into the sea. Namor showed up but got captured too. Then it was revealed that the Avengers had sorta killed the Lava Men's demonic patron and accidentally wiped out like... almost all of the Lava Men? And the Lava Witchdoctor Jinku is the one that summoned a bunch of not-sapient Lava Men and used them to kidnap the Avengers so he could summon a giant lava monster at them about it.

Meanwhile, Avengers Island is still teetering atop a big spire made of cooled Lava Men and those Lava Men are starting to crumble. The island is in danger of falling, wrecking the Avenger's nice, new base that they haven't had a chance to enjoy because they had a stretch of bad writing! Also Jarvis is still on the island! We like Jarvis here!

He uses the radio to issue an emergency priority double-A one, probably the most emergency of priority calls.

The West Coast Avengers West Coast heard the call last time but still haven't arrived. But Reed and Sue were still in New York so were able to respond much sooner.

Sue points out that they didn't bring specialized equipment with them but Reed tells her that she's all the equipment they need.

He always says the most romantic things.

But he tells her to use her invisible force fields to jam an invisible wedge under the island to shore it up.

It's hard though.

I don't know the exact mechanism of how strain on her force fields impacts Sue but she's carrying thousands of tons with only her brain. That's a lot of pressure.

Science brain Reed points out that the triangle is the strongest form in mechanics so she should be able to bear it.

The rock is still crumbling away from the pillar but Reed tells her not to worry about it. Just keep holding up thousands of tons of island.

Meanwhile, down down down below, the Avengers fight Jinku's lava beast.

Sure, he's calling them mean names like infidel and blasphemer, just because they killed his god but on the other hand, they killed his god and that act consequently killed most of his people.

Anger is a reasonable reaction to that.

I don't think I mentioned it last time but this is a very Marvel monster design.

The horns all over his head, the teeth that stick out like gravestones, the chipped nails, the red that looks like pink, the big brow ridge, the blank eyes. If he were introduced in the 60s he'd probably be called Lavva or Moltenn and have a tidy number of appearances over the years.

But he's actually called Avatar of Cha'sa'dra and has such a specific purpose in this book that he doesn't appear beyond this story unless its in a flashback to this story.

Gilgamesh leaps right at the Avatar, despite Cap's warning, and gets molten lava horfed all over him. Which quickly cools into a cocoon of basalt.

You wouldn't think it would cool that quickly but maybe its magic lava. You don't know.

She-Hulk rips up a stalagmite and whacks the Avatar in the ankle while yelling "IT'S CLOBBERING TIME!"

And she's kind of right because the Avatar leans over and clobbers her across the cave.

Cap tries to smash open Gilgamesh's basalt cocoon but can't make a scratch nor dent in the tough stone.

Gilgamesh just OH YEAHs free. Because he's super strong.

Captain America: "Watch it there, big man! Those flying fragments could have hurt somebody!"

It's sad that Gilgamesh and Captain America's dynamic has wholly become "Cap nags Gilgamesh for not considering his actions for even five seconds."

Back in the Inferno tie-ins, Cap was legitimately interested in getting to know Gilgamesh and to figure out if all his name dropping and claims to have been behind so many legendary deeds were bullshit or not.

Anyway, the mention of basalt gets Black Panther thinking.

Lava Men are tough to fight because they're semi-liquid. They can just reform from injury. But Jinku has hardened into basalt, apparently, despite being colored the same pink as the rest of the Lava Men. Instead of the dark gray that Gilgamesh's basalt coating had.

But given that Jinku is apparently solid stone and not gooey lava, Black Panther decides to excuse himself from the giant monster fight to sneak up and ambush Jinku while the guy is distracted controlling the Avatar.

Black Panther grabs Jinku's staff and wrestles for it. He tells him to surrender the staff or Black Panther will rip off his arm to take it.

But Jinku has more than just the strength of his basalt arm at his disposal. While he wrestles with Black Panther, Jinku is also controlling the Avatar. And he has the Avatar throw Namor at Black Panther.

Bonk.

Thor gets fed up with all this and decides to UNLEASH HIS TRUE MIGHT. He stirs up a hurricane, right here in this underground cave.

But Captain America stops him, saying that the storm will collapse the cave on the Avengers before it fells the Avatar.

Thor does stop but points out that they're getting their asses kicked right now anyway.

And then Black Panther notes that the Avatar is raising the heat in the cave and then passes the fuck out from it.

Captain America is holding up better, because super soldier formula. I guess the heart-shaped herb isn't a thing yet?

Feels weird for that to not be a thing.

Meanwhile, the Avengers West Coast arrives just as Invisible Sue is getting overwhelmed by holding up an entire island.

Wonder Man flies up to the teetering Avengers Island and grabs a corner to hold up. Taking some of the burden off of Sue.

In one of those moments that feels like a handwave to cover an error, Mr Reedtastic wonders how Wonder Man's dinky belt rockets have the lift to hold up so much weight.

Reed decides that the rockets are drawing power from Wonder Man's mutated life energy.

Despite that being a bonkers thing to posit.

Presumably, Byrne drew Wonder Man holding up a corner of Avengers Island and only afterward realized that's not how physics works.

Either way, Wonder Man manages to level the island, balancing on top of the rock spire.

Now that its temporarily balanced, Reed tells Sue to drop her force field. Let Atlas over here hold up the entire thing himself.

Wonder Man: "Hey! Do you mind, Richards? I'm already busting my back as it is!"

But Reed is looking at the big picture. Instead of just holding it up, they need to get it down, safely.

So while Wonder Man holds the entire thing himself, Invisible Sueman creates an invisible force field that spirals around the rock column.

Sue assumes this is to reinforce the column but it's still crumbling like this. Which Reed confirms is his plan. He wants the column to crumble.

MEANWHILE, back at the hot plot.

Black Panther, Captain America, and Quasar have passed the hell out from the heat. Namor and She-Hulk are flagging. And Thor and Gilgamesh are still going strong, monster punching.

Thor tells She-Hulk that this isn't just heat, it's magic heat. Which isn't constructive input.

She-Hulk suggests every Avenger still standing combine their strength to take out Avatar.

... Why weren't you combining your strength before?

Jinku: "It will avail you nothing, giantess! You who see yourselves as the noble champions of the surface world! But this time it is you who are the villains! And mine is the right of retribution!"

And then Jinku repeats the entire story about how their god Cha'sa'dra turned the Lava Men into immortal Lava Men, how he got called away from his busy god job to participate in some conflict (Inferno), how Cha'sa'dra got whacked by the Avengers, and how his death caused most of the Lava Men to turn to meat men again and instantly age to death.

She-Hulk: "We know all that! You told us not ten minutes ago..."

Do you get points for lampshading your own writing cliches?

Since we're in recap town for anyone who didn't pick up last issue, She-Hulk reiterates that Cha'sa'dra wasn't a god but an evil demon.

As you might expect, Jinku is no happier to hear this than the first time they told him.

So he recaps at them some more, explaining that the Lava Men that didn't instantly die, instead turned into "mindless stone."

So Jinku is the last Lava Man, he's pissed, and he's making it the Avengers' problem for causing the situation.

Even Thor is feeling the heat at this point. But Gilgamesh is still going strong because of bullshit Eternal resistances.

Gilgamesh EYE BEAMMMMs the ceiling of the cave, collapsing about a mountain worth of rock on top of the Avatar. THUS THE PROBLEM IS DEALT WITH FOREVER.

The Avatar just bursts out from under the rock pile, like he's coming back for one last scare.

Jinku says that since the Avatar isn't really alive, he can't die. Sure.

At this point, Namor has passed out from the heat and She-Hulk has gotten knocked out when the Avatar OH YEAH'd from under the mountain.

Leaving just Thor and Gilgamesh.

Except Gilgamesh decides he's going to solo this.

Thor: "Gilgamesh, no! Thy thoughts are madness!" Gilgamesh: "Then madness is the only way a warrior should think! Hear me, monster, if mind you have to understand... I am the warrior of the thousand names! I am the dragon slayer! I have fought ten thousand-thousand battles, and I have won them all! I am without equal in the annals of the Earth... AND I AM YOUR DOOM!!"

Dammit, Gilgamesh, why did you suddenly decide to be interesting? For irony reasons? Because he really does get smacked down immediately after that speech.

Fuckin' Gilgamesh.

Also, the hit Gilgamesh took was so devastating that he's just dead or something. The other Avengers have regained consciousness in time to observe that Gilgamesh isn't breathing.

Jinku gloats that soon the rest of the Avengers will be as dead as Gilgamesh probably is. And Namor goes Well Actually uh it seems less hellishly hot around here lately. Which Captain America seconds. Does seem less hot for some reason.

Jinku ignores that to direct the Avatar to kill the Avengers but he doesn't do that. He just stands and stares off at nothing.

Jinku: "What sorcery is this? My lava monster does not move... Does not obey me..." Someone: "Nor shall he, Jinku. He is ours now to control."

Dun dun dun.

Hey, remember all those Lava Men who didn't die but did turn into statues?

Yeah. They're fine now. They're good. They're better than good. They're golden.

And they karate chop Jinku so hard that he too becomes golden.

Apparently they all just needed some time to grow into their True Form.

Also, apparently, Jinku was constantly feeling agony every moment which does explain why he was so pissed and unwilling to listen to the Avengers tell him his god was shit. That and the blasphemy. But now that he's golden, the pain is gone. And he is in a better mood.

One of the gold dudes explains : "Free of the influence of Cha'sa'dra, we have evolved into this higher, finer form. And with this form comes greater understanding! Our brothers died because they were too thoroughly corrupted by Cha'sa'dra's evil magicks... But somehow, in our heart of hearts, we remained untouched... And so did you. For though you sought the destruction of the Avengers, it was not hate that drove you, but grief and anguish. You wished only to see right snatched from what you thought a terrible wrong. And so it has been. Set aside your weapon, brother, and let the joy of this beginning fill your soul!"

Well, okay.

This does not work for me.

For one thing, the people that became statues instead of instantly aging to death were said to be the ones who studied and used Cha'sa'dra's magicks for themselves. Why did using more magick mean being less corrupted?

For another, I dunno. I wish the Avengers had any input into the end of this plot. As it stands, they just get bounced around the room for a while and then deus ex rockina, they get saved because the plot clock ran down.

For another, dunno that Jinku is absolved of blame just because he was sad about bad things that happened. He was taking his grief out on Avengers that hadn't even been around to kill his god. She-Hulk, Namor, Black Panther, and Quasar weren't involved in that.

For a fourth thing, geez. You brought up the idea that the Avengers accidentally a genocide of the Lava Men. I don't like how they get absolved of all blame because "oh the ones that died, they all sucked, its good that they died." HOLY SHIT that is a take.

And I know, what kind of satisfying resolution can there be from the Avengers accidentally killing off all the Lava Men because they whacked a demon invading Earth. What moral lesson should they take from that? Don't punch demons? I don't know where I wanted the subplot to go after it was brought up that the Avengers did make an inadvertent fuckup and did real harm to this molten community but I can damn well tell you, never mind all that those guys sucked, actually, is maybe the worst way for it to go!

Anyway anyway anyway.

Jinku apologizes for doing the Avengers harm.

Hah. And Captain America says, half downplaying and half twisting the knife, that they'll all recover except Gilgamesh who is possibly probably dead from being punched too hard.

(I'm sure he's not dead. And not just in the way that almost no comic book character stays dead forever. More in the sense of what kind of shitty Eternal dies of being punched to death by a lava monster?)

Next time on Avengers, I guess we'll find out how dead Gilgamesh is.

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[tf-guru]

From selling to building [f->Raven] MC

Isn't it crazy how one simple decision can change your entire life. Investing in the right place at the right places, losing your life savings after a shady internet deal, hell even forgetting your coffee one morning causing you to collide with a lamppost. God I would kill for even a sip of coffee, hard to get it in my current situation. But I'm getting ahead of myself.

My name was Valley Jackson, one of the most successful realtors in Southern California. I don't know why I'm creating this manuscript in my head, its not like I'll be able to write or even tell someone about it. Maybe it's what I would create if I were to be human again. Maybe it's just to keep me sane. Regardless here's what happened.

I had been traveling north to LA to secure a deal with one of my higher paying clients, normally I'd have them come to me but due to their status I decided to make the drive. I was on the highway around 10:30 at night when I missed my exit. That little mistake cost me everything...

Valley let out an exasperated curse as she looked ahead to see when the next exit would be coming up. In her 42 years of living in California she had visited LA maybe three times. Seeing the next exit approached she signaled and got off the highway. She was 5'6" with an absolutely stunning figure. At that time her auburn hair hung just below her shoulders and her nails were painted white. She looked down at her gps and saw as it started to emmit static before shutting off entirely

"Damn it" she muttered as she realized she was in the middle of nowhere. After about a half hour of driving in circles she finally was about to give up and try again in the morning when a sign glinted just ahead. It read "Pan's antique shop. Open 24 hours! Maps and sightseeing guides provided."

"Oh thank god! Kinda strange its open 24 hours but I guess when tourism is your biggest income it wouldn't hurt to take in a late night traveler."

Soon she pulled into the long driveway marked by another sign. Down the road was a decent sized rustic store. Its arched windows alight with a yellow glow. She parked her car and entered the shop. Behind the counter was a twenty something man who was reading a book. He looked up and said

"Hi welcome to Pan's antique shop. What can I help you with?" Valley replied

"Oh I'm on my way to LA and missed my exit, do you have a map I could look at?"

"Sure, feel free to look around while I get them."

As he took a door behind his desk Valley looked around. There were various items, old political pins, rotary phones, a Walkman, but Valley only saw one thing that caught her eye. It was a pair of Raven shaped earrings. She was drawn to them almost magnetically, their golden beaks glinting in the shops lights.. She grabbed them and headed back to the counter. The man had returned with a few traveling maps.

"Did you find something you like?"

"Yeah, just these earrings. I take it you're Pan?"

He gave a small chuckle with a hint of something else but Valley couldn't quite determine what

"Oh no, definitely not. Pan's the owner, I just work night shift."

"Ah, well thank you!" She paid for the earrings and grabbed the maps.

"Drive safe!"

As Valley started to leave she suddenly felt really lightheaded before passing out completely.

"We're just gonna head about a hundred more feet ahead then we've made it to the camping spot."

Valley opened her eyes to see one of the magnificent California redwoods ahead of her. Confused, she looked over to see who spoke.

"You okay Valley? You look kinda pale." The speaker was a woman around her age with brown hair and a more slim figure than Valley's

"Who are you? How do you know my name?"

"Uh Valley are you okay? Its me, your childhood friend Hailey? Do you seriously not know? Maybe we should look at that medici-"

"Im just kidding Hailey!" She was sensitive about discussing her medication. New memories appeared as she realized she did know Hailey, of course she did. She also remembered how she had decided to take this trip to celebrate Haileys 40th birthday.

"So just another 100ft Hay?"

"Yeah, if you're sure you're alright."

The pair continued the 100 feet before coming across a good enough sized clearing. Valley looked around while Hailey removed her tent bag from her back.

"You gonna help or just gawk?"

"Be right there Hailey!"

After some tribulations the pair managed to secure the tent to the ground. Valley removed two sleeping bags from her backpack and the pair began to undress. However as Valley took off her jeans something clattered to the ground. She reached down and picked up a pair of Raven earrings. Hailey turned around and froze.

"That's odd, I thought I got these on my way to-" she stopped as regained recollection of what had just been happening a few hours prior. She scratched her arm and looked at Hailey

"Oh uh silly Valley dont you remember getting those at the trail gift shop?"

"I got these at an antique shop today. In fact, I don't remember what happened after that. Did you drug me?"

"Valley you're not thinking clearly must be the medi-"

"No! Its not my medication! I don't even know you!"

"Valley I-"

"Did you bring me here to kidnapp me? Are people coming to kill me? I'm leaving!" Valley exited the tent with no pants or shirt and started to head back to the road.

"Wait!" Valley gave the finger and continued.

"I said wait." Hailey said in a dominant tone and Valley suddenly felt her knees lock. Something or someone was controlling her.

"What the hell?"

"Valley, I'm sorry it has to go this way. I was hoping-"

"Somebody help! Somebod-"

"Silence" Valley tried to scream again but no sound came out. She looked back to Hailey, terrified.

"Im sorry you're having to go through this. Here's how its gonna go, you are going to transform into a raven in a minute or two. My name is Hailey but this isn't me"

Before Valleys eyes Hailey underwent her own transformation. Her breasts retreated slightly into her chest as she lost some height. Her features softened and when it completed she looked to be in her early twenties.

"Im gonna give you the ability to speak and move but please don't scream."

She snapped her fingers and Valley fell to the ground. She looked up at Hailey and retorted

"I dont know what kind of drugs you've filled me with but-" she looked at her arm as she felt and itch. On her left arm was a single black feather. Not laying on it but actually attached to it. She pulled at it only to feel a sharp pain. As she watched more feathers sprouted down her arm. With each feather she grimaced but as soon as they reached her hand something else happened.

Her fingers merged together to form a single appendage. Only then did she realize it was real.

"P-please don't do this to me. I have a life! A career!"

"Don't worry, Pan's already sorted everything out. All your clients belive they've been using a different realtor, your family only remembers your brother. Its all packed away."

"I want to talk to Pan, please!"

She looked at her foot and saw three sharp talons poke through her sock. With her good hand she reached down and removed the sock. To her shock her ankle was covered by a corse yellow layer of a scale like texture.

"Im sorry, no can do. Pan's pretty busy and doesn't worry about stuff like this. I can take a message though."

"Please tell him to stoooaaaawk!" She grabbed her mouth and felt as her lips began to hardnen and push back against her hand.

"I'll tell him that, here's this." She handed a small mirror to Valley who looked into it. Her face also had jet black feathers on it, removing her hand revealed a small beak forming. Three more talons burst from her other foot as she pleaded once again

"I caaaaw! I caan't be a raven! I'm a human!" Hailey walked over and removed Valley's undergarments. Looking into the mirror Valley saw her face was covered in feathers and her mouth had finished becoming a beak. Her other arm followed the first as she dropped the mirror. Trying one last time she tried to plead

"Caw! Caw caw!" No matter how hard she tried she couldn't speak. So, she reached out with her wing and touched Haileys hand. But as she reached out it became harder and harder to extend her arm as they slowly tucked behind her back. She looked down with a shiver of ironic pleasure as her anus and vagina moved together to form her cloaca. Then she began to shrink. She hunched over, her body reforming so she would never stand upright again. As the transformation finished Valley looked down into the mirror and saw her eye shift from brown to purple, she fully resembled a raven. New thoughts entered her mind

'Eggs'

'Nesting'

'Flight'

'Mating'

'Offspring'

While she retained her human thoughts and mind she now had these new impulses and urges. She looked up to see Hailey writing in small notebook.

"Valley, Raven with purple eyes, room..." she checks her watch

"Room a2e365. I'm sorry this happened but try to become acclimated with your new life. Goodbye Valley."

She then faded away, leaving Valley alone.

Well, that's my story. After Hailey left I was forced to adapt to my new body. The first month I would continually hope to just wake up in my bed, ready for my old life. But that never happened. I got used to eating whatever I could find and flying oh flying. If there is any upside to the change (I still want to go back to my old life every day) its flying. Being able to soar through the skies unrestricted is freeing. The area im in is strange because if I fly more than around two miles in any direction I blink and end up back at the (now gone) campsite. I eventually figured put how to build a nest. Its not much, just some twigs in a tree but its mine.

One day I was doing my daily routine when I heard a whistle from bellow me. Soaring down I saw Hailey with a bag of birdseed. I perched on a tree branch near her and stared at her with resent. I continued my gaze until she extended some seed and my bird instincts took over and I automatically ate some.

"Thats better, I'm sorry I took so long to visit. How are you doing? I know its a big change but at least you have plenty of room to fly around. I got you this by the way, should make things easier."

She hung a small bird feeder on a nearby branch and continued

"Well, I'll be back." And she left me alone once again. She still visits every once in a while telling me more about how I'm lucky I still have my intellect and how I could behave been left as a mindless bird. I guess I am kinda lucky. Hold on, I see another Raven approaching my nest. Ooo he's a male, maybe ill get to feel the full bird experience ;)