#saying they deserve to linger and suffer and shit LMAO

[y2khaos-archive]

part 1 of ??? of the Very Cool AI Squad AU lineup

[twstoric]

missed connections

𝒂𝒏𝒐𝒏𝒚𝒎𝒐𝒖𝒔 𝒂𝒔𝒌𝒆𝒅: Idk if I'm allowed to ask for follow-ups to other asks but I couldn't see anything in the rules about it so I'm gonna try lol. Could I get Jamil, Leona and Vil from the "s/o confesses and is rejected" scenario developing feelings for the s/o they previously rejected but the s/o has moved on? I live for that sad "in love too late" shit uwu

𝕡𝕒𝕚𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕘: jamil viper x gn!reader, leona kingscholar x gn!reader, vil schoenheit x gn!reader

𝕤𝕦𝕞𝕞𝕒𝕣𝕪: a connection from where your two ends meet to blossom into something moreーit’s such a shame such feelings never met

𝕨𝕒𝕣𝕟𝕚𝕟𝕘(𝕤): angst

𝕨𝕠𝕣𝕕 𝕔𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕥: 1.4k (total)

𝕟𝕠𝕥𝕖: lmao your efforts will not go fruitless! and follow up asks are more than welcomed! 💞also, listening to alan walker’s ‘tired’ suddenly boosted my idea for this and i was like..? wutt lmaoーi hope you’ll cry enjoy!

𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙩 𝙧𝙚𝙛𝙚𝙧𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙚𝙙

Jamil Viper

“I can’t fix this,” he scowls, clutching at the front of his hoodie and tugging on it as if it’s the reason why he finds it difficult to breath. “This, this pain I feel whenever I look at you.” He scowls glaring at the ground because despite you being the cause of the asphyxiation in his chest, he can’t come to hate you for itーnot when he’s the one who put you through that feeling first.

It feels so pointless. All the skills and money in the world can’t combine to fix the feelings he feels and he wonders why it took so long to finally come to terms with such emotions. “I’m so sorry,” he says instead, out of breath and mind blanking. He can’t think of anything else to say but that. In the end, he’s the cause of all his sufferings.

You hear your heart pounding in your ears, hands clammy and throat dry. You don’t.. understand why this is happeningーwhy now. “You don’t have to apologise, Jamil… None of this is your fault.” You reassure, keeping distance when the vice leader had recoiled from you when you tried to approach earlier.

Jamil laughs, voice plain and finding the irony of things. To think that he was the one to normally comfort you when his routine was filled with your presence, now dwindled down when such habits died.. “You make it sound like it’s your fault,” he chuckles, unamused. “It’s not.” He whispers, brows furrowing as if thinking of something. 

“Jamil, you don’t have to apologise,” you say again, voice firm and finally taking a step towards him. You continue when he doesn’t try to move away again. “No one’s to blame for this. I guess.. things like this can happen,” you frown, not liking the words you’re saying but you feel like it has to be voiced.

No one could’ve seen what would happen when touching in to such emotions.

Your peer into his face, slightly obscured by his hood and washing away any lingering hesitancy, you reach out a hand to gently hold his face. Jamil blinks in surprise, looking at you as if you can ease the pain he’s feeling. It feels so strange to understand such feelings..

“You’ll be fine,” you whisper, unable to voice your words any louder in fear of startling the delicance Jamil is showing you. 

His expression crumbles, lips trembling and eyes conveying so much emotion he doesn’t normally show. He looks so tired suddenly. Tired of feeling too much and nothing at the same time. 

Jamil cups your face in return; daring himself to touch a forbidden jewel. He doesn’t say anything, but you can feel in the way his eyes look at you. 

For the time being, until the feelings in his chest he knows he won’t let go of fades, he’ll keep his distance from you. Locking himself in a prison too deep in the earth for you to follow.

Leona Kingscholar

“If I had…”

said yes

“Would we..”

still be together?

The words feel like pinpricks in his throat. Painful to say and difficult to voice. But you, in all your kindness and understanding of him, smiles like you understand—without words, you’ll always understand Leona.

“I don’t know..” your face is awfully delicate when you say this, voice quiet and lacking in confidence unlike how you normally are with him. Leona can’t help but grimace at the honesty of your answer. You continue when seeing the look on his face, “Since that option never happened,” you smile, voice filled with understanding—despite the indications of the words, Leona knows you’re not blaming him. “I really wouldn’t know where we would be right now.”

We could be together, he wants to argue. Together—and in love, I guess. He wants so bad to argue, but thinking over that possibility makes him laugh. Even if you were together, Leona can’t guarantee he’ll make you happy. He doesn’t think he’ll be able to do just that. 

You perk up, clasping your hands together and Leona wonders how it’ll feel like to hold your hand. “But you know! We can still hang out if you like,” you smile, sheepish and rubbing your hands together to steel your nerves. “Like we used to- I.. I’d really like that.. if you want, of course.” You nod, smiling but Leona can tell it doesn’t reach your eyes. That look is familiar. Like how you look on that day your routine together crumbled—you look as though you’re preparing for another rejection. 

Leona stares at the ground for a moment, ears following his movements before they perk up again when he looks at you. He doesn’t say anything when he takes quick strides over to you and you don’t get to move away when Leona cups your cheek with one hand. 

Something glazes over the dorm head’s eyes; an emotion you’re not familiar with when usually looking into them. His palm feels so warm against your cheek, holding you with such care as if touching you risks turning you into sand—but no. Leona holds you as if it’s the last time he’ll ever touch you. 

Your breath stutters when he gives you a small smile; so much sadness in a notion usually for the purpose of joy. It’s an unfamiliar expression on him. Loving, tender, kind. All the things he usually hides behind an impassive face. 

Much too quickly, Leona pulls away, patting your head and turns around. His footsteps ring in your ear. It feels like your heart is breaking with every distance created between you. You can’t help the few tears falling from your eyes. Without words, you know. 

It’s the last time you’ll ever see him so closely.

Vil Schoenheit

“I can’t change how you feel,” Vil whispers, eyes blurring with tears as he tries to keep his emotions in check. You call out to him worriedly but it only seems to make him more nervous. He bites his bottom lip, lipstick smeared and ruined as he staggers away from you. “What a tragic tale this is..” He laughs, coming to terms with something you don’t understand.

“Vil, look at me,” you plead, reaching out to him but Vil recoils like you’ll burn him. You stop, heart pounding and forcing your hands down your sides. “Alright, I won’t touch you. Just- just please talk to me. Tell me what’s wrong.” 

The blond freezes at that. Eyes wide and blinking before he raises his eyes to look at you. He looks so.. lost. You don’t like that lookーit doesn’t suit him. A small smile stretches his lips, eyes glazing with tears but he doesn’t cry. Vil looks at you like he’s already lost too much.

“Nothing’s wrong,” he starts and you want to protest. “I just… I finally understand how you feel- I suppose..” He sounds uncertain, brows furrowing as if he’s searching for the right words to say. It makes your heart ache; he’s never one to filter his thoughts and it feels like that’s exactly what he’s doing right nowーfiltering what he truly thinks with you.

You exhale softly, not even realising you’ve held your breath and offer him a small smile. “Just.. be honest with me, Vil. I’m right here.” 

Vil blinks the tears away, his smile lifting just the slightest bit but you can still see the sadness lingering there. “Then.. I want to apologise.” He laughs softly, eyes casted downwards; unable to look at you. “For putting you through such emotions.. You don’t deserve to feel something so painful,” he sighs and when he looks at you again, his smile reaches his eyes.

“I can’t change the feelings you’ve lost for me and I’m not willing to change this feeling I’ve gained for you,” Vil walks closer to you. His smile is gentle, radiating the beauty that is Vil’s whole existence when he looks at you with emotions you’ve directed at him countless times before. You feel your breathing stop, as if such miniscule movements would disrupt whatever atmosphere you’re in.

Vil gently takes your hand in his, intertwining your fingers together as his other hand cups your face gently. Despite the loving way he gazes at you, it feels almost too suffocating to receive such fondness. You wonder if this is how Vil felt when you looked at him like that. 

“For now, let me suffer with these feelings I have for you.”

[sheabuttahwrites]

[I Know]

. four : reunited, and it feels so...

three

Monday

It was about twenty minutes after eight and Cam had just left. Though, I’d been up for a while since I had to make breakfast for him. I didn’t mind, because I was too anxious to sleep anyway. I was finally about to get out of this depressing ass house for a bit. And O was never boring, so I knew it was about to be a good time. Plus I was so ready to see him. I don't know why, but this particular stretch had felt much longer than all the others. I was on the way to go pack my bag when I decided to mess with him a little instead. I grabbed my phone ready to compose a text, but I already had a notification from him. 

Get up. I’m in route, on my way to you

It had only been there for one minute. I guess we both had the same idea to play this morning. 

I’m up. Been up

You ready?

Yes big head I’m ready 

Ok short legs I was just making sure

I hollered. He was just average height himself, and only about six inches taller than me. Calling somebody short. 

Lmao why you gotta take it there? I’ll be in your vicinity today, don't get beat up

I’m not worried

You should be

Why? Ain't nobody scared of you Jay Baby

Say it to my face

You think I won't

Ok keep that same energy when you see me

Oh fa sho, you do the same

Don't worry about me, you know I’m a G 

Keep talking with your bad ass 

You ain’t gon do nothing

Me and my big head can stay home

I’m not worried lmao you know you wanna see me

You ain't funny

And you ain't gotta lie, you chuckled 

Lol anyway I’m leaving now, I’ll be over there in a minute

I know 

Lmao whatever

I laughed aloud sending him three crying laughing emoji, then slid my phone down into my bra. Finally, I went over to the closet to fill my duffle. I threw a few casual pieces in first, because comfort over everything, and then I added about three or four that could possibly be worn out. I grabbed some sneakers, a couple pairs of heels, a little jewelry, underwear, pajamas, and I packed a separate smaller bag with all of my toiletries. I had taken a shower earlier so I was ready. For about a second, I debated on whether I should change, then decided against it. I knew we would be going right to sleep once we got to his place, so my loungewear would do. 

While I waited for him, I walked over to the mirror, happy that my home remedies had helped my bruises and swelling disappear so quickly. It had only been about two and a half days, but a few aspirin and some intense ice pack usage had really worked. My rug burns were scabbed, but I wasn't too worried about those since the majority would be under my clothes. However, there was still a tiny something at the corner of my mouth, so I covered it with a bit of concealer and finished it with some setting powder. And I was sure to toss the two of them into my makeup bag for later use. 

A little after nine, much to my delight, the doorbell rang. I squealed, giddy as ever, as I jumped up to walk to the door. And, when I opened it, before me stood my bestest friend in the whole world with the goofiest smile on his face. I laughed and invited him in, so excited that I was hardly able to get the door closed behind him. Then I kissed his cheek and pulled him into the tightest hug. It felt so good to be in his arms again. “Hey.” I spoke into his chest and his deep, honeyed timbre fluttered against my ears. 

“Hey.”

I closed my eyes and just held on to him, feeling completely carefree, taking in a moment that didn't get to happen as much as I’d like. I didn't want to let go. Until he took his face down to nuzzle my neck. I flinched and giggled, backing away from him and shielding myself with my shoulder. He knew better. “Don't…”

“Now what's all that shit you was talking?” he asked jokingly, looking down into my face and laughing. 

I tossed my head back, cackling, before I went to smack his arm. “Shut up.”

“Look out. You ready?”

“Yeah, just let me get my stuff.” I left his embrace and started for the living room where I had been waiting.

“Hurry up, get me out this nigga shit.”

I screamed. I knew he hated coming here. But this was his own fault. Because he also didn’t like texting to tell me he was outside, because to him it wasn't courteous. For the same reason, he didn’t like me taking Ubers to or from his place. I personally didn't have a problem with either. Both had been done maybe twice in the beginning and he told me he felt weird about it. I only half understood, but I didn't fight him on it. Honestly, it felt nice to actually be valued for a change. “Simmer down, sir. I’m coming.”

“You know you naked?” 

I paid him no mind and kept moving toward my bags, still tickled by his earlier demand. “Whatever. No, I’m not.” My boxers and tank were plenty clothes.

“Dude would probably have a fit if he knew you were leaving the house in that.” 

Slightly appalled, I stopped mid stroll and turned back to him. “Excuse you? He would also have a fit if he knew you were picking his girl up. But that hasn’t been an issue for you for how long now?”

“Good point. Carry on.” The way he waved me off almost had me in tears. My rebuttal had shut him up too quick. 

“I thought so.”

“Not even a jacket, though? It’s kinda cool out there.”

“I’ll be ok. I’m just running to the car then right into the house after that.”

“If you say so. But what happened to your knee?” 

“Oh, nothing. I scraped it on the carpet. It was an accident,” I hastily explained just under a shout, disappearing around the corner. I hoped I wouldn't have to go into more detail. Omari definitely wasn't shy about asking questions when he wanted to know something.

“Oh. Damn.”

I returned in no time with my duffle bag in hand and my purse on my arm. He took the bag, being his usual gentlemanly self, and I grabbed my keys to lock up the house. Once we were on the porch, I made sure to engage the alarm from my phone. Then he and I hopped into his white Range that I loved so much, and we were out. 

“You hungry?” he asked, yawning.

I yawned instantly, seeing him do it first. “Nah, I'm good. I just wanna go back to sleep.” 

“Word. Me, too.” 

After Cam was done packing last night, he woke me up for round three. Or maybe it was four. I don’t know. But it wasn’t uncommon for him to try and fuck me senseless before he left for work. I guess he thought overuse of his penis was what it took for me to still be there whenever he returned. Whatever the case, I was tired as hell and in need of some serious rest. 

2:04pm

I opened my eyes, slowly becoming aware that Jade and I were face to face. I lingered for a second, letting my vision clear up, enjoying the view more than anything, though. She was stunning. Just so beautiful. Her features had to have been sculpted by the most masterful hands, using only the finest of materials. The lines were sharp, but they had a softness to them. Her skin was golden like warmed maple on a glorious Sunday morning. When they were available, her round, dark brown eyes were gentle, yet so alluring. The way they sparkled in the sun always got me. To top it all off, her sultry pout sat perfectly beneath a nose that fit just right. She was flawless. 

While I stood stretching, yawning, alternating between bending and rubbing the arm she had been lying on, I could see a sense of calm in her expression. She always looked that way when we were together. Like she was happy. And I knew that wasn't the case at home. I tried not to think about it too often, but honestly it really bothered me. She hit me up pretty regularly, revealing how he talked to her, the many ways he mistreated her. But it was probably a lot worse than she was willing to admit. My instincts told me that he was putting his hands on her. She had never confirmed my suspicions, but I knew it was the truth. I knew. And the thought of that shit alone killed me. She was so sweet. So soft spoken and mild mannered. She didn't have a cruel bone in her body. I just couldn’t imagine her actually having the need to protect herself not only from harmful, ugly words but some nigga’s hand. It fucked me up. She was easily my favorite person. I hadn’t witnessed a more pure soul. And to be aware that she was suffering, especially through something so horrible and damaging, was beginning to be too much. I couldn't do shit about it. I couldn't fix it, I couldn't change it. All I could do was be there for her, give her a place to decompress from time to time. Which I loved. I wanted to help her in any way I could, but I was starting to feel like I was in over my head. Truthfully, I didn’t know how much longer I was gonna be able to do this. It was becoming very difficult for me to live with myself. My conscience was tearing my ass up. The most trifling woman didn’t deserve what she was being subjected to every day, and she wasn’t even guilty of anything. Her only fault was loving a nigga who meant her absolutely no good.

I didn't fully understand that either. Of course I knew love could make you do things you maybe wouldn't normally do, but in this case, what was there to love? How could she look at a nigga who was constantly causing her pain and feel anything other than hate? I just didn't get it. She had to know that whatever she was experiencing wasn't love. He was abusing her. How could she still love him? Why would she take his wrath and still allow him to receive all of her goodness? She had to know he didn't deserve it. She had to know that she deserved so much better. From any man. From life. From any situation she found herself in. She had to know that something wasn't right.

But she held fast to her claims. From the start she made it known that she was in a relationship and that she was in love. I respected her honesty, but her words and her actions never matched up. Her mood on the way to my place and the one on the way back to hers were always on two completely opposite ends of the scale. I don't know if she couldn't conceal it or if she just didn't care to, but it was painfully evident where she was excited to be and where she dreaded. She just didn't move like the taken woman she alleged to be. Not by her ‘man’ at least. 

I walked into the bathroom and made my way to the toilet. Then I went to the sink to wash up. I was leaning over brushing my teeth when I felt her arms wrap around me.

I kissed his back, resting my head right against his bare skin after. “Hey.”

“What’s up?” 

I caught his reflection in the mirror and, before I could stop them, my lips had curled into an enormous grin. I was so ridiculously glad to finally be in the same place as him. Plus he was so cute. He had toothpaste all over his mouth, but it took nothing away from his appearance. I couldn't help but notice how good we looked standing there together. A better best friend duo didn't exist. 

“I’ma start thinking you happy to see me in a minute,” he teased, finishing up at the sink. 

I busted out laughing. How dare he just blow up my spot like that? I let my arms fall from his waist. He turned to face me and I swatted his chest, backing away to leave the room. “Get off. Don't act like you didn't miss me.”

He followed me out, going toward his closet. “I already told you that. You know I’m always glad to be in your presence.”

“Um hmm.” I bashfully rolled my eyes, blushing against my own will. Thankfully he was trailing me. He went into the closet and I leaned up against the doorway. “So I thought about it, let’s stay in today.”

“Ok.” He took a t-shirt from one of the drawers and pulled it over his head. “That’s cool.”

“We can go do something tomorrow.”

“Well, I got a couple meetings,” he casually announced, walking over to the other side of the room headed for the couch.

“Awww.” I wasn’t expecting him to have to work so soon. “What time?”

“The first one is at nine in the morning, but neither of them should take too long. Nobody’s recording and I’m not mixing anything. So it should only be a few hours.” 

I stood as he sat, my demeanor in a totally different arena than before. My arms were loosely folded across my chest and a slight scowl had inevitably taken over my expression. “Ok.”

“Jay,” he chuckled, picking up the remote, “don't act like that.”

“I know what you call a few hours. I probably gotta be here all day without you.” 

“It won't be all day,” he claimed, giving the TV all of his attention as he flipped through the channels. “I should be back by around three at the latest. Maybe four.”

I smacked my lips, annoyed that he was alluding to seven hours being minuscule. That was most certainly the entire day. “That’s long.”

“Pooh, you know work doesn't stop. I’m always working.”

“I know, but I just got here.”

He sighed heavily, looking up at me with remorseful eyes and a frown to match. “Why you tryna make me feel bad?”

“I’m not. I just don’t know what I’m gonna do with myself,” I spoke lightly, but the defeat was heavy in my voice. I dropped my head and gave him my eyes, making sure to slouch my shoulders and pout as deeply as I could manage. I didn't even hold it long before we were both cracking up. 

“Don't even try it. Fake self.” 

“Whaaaat?”

“You just about to be sleep the whole time anyway.” 

I doubled over and slapped my knee, because he definitely wasn’t lying. “Whatever.” But I was not about to admit it. Instead, I went to my bag and grabbed my toothbrush and toothpaste. “Be right back.”

[elliethesuperfruitlover]

Cormac Mcnamara Fluff HC’s and SFW Concepts (x black reader for my inclusion) (heehee)

A/N: I spent some of my time off from the hellscape that is school on starting Foreign Exchange. Yeah, I don’t care much for Hannah, she only calls poor Cormac when she needs smth, and the poor thing gets led on so. Time for me to get my fluff fix in. He deserves all of the love and hugs. So, virtually, I’m gonna do that for my little cinnamon roll. I’d be friends with him if I went to school in Ireland for some reason.

@misskittysmagicportal you’re welcome lmao

Warnings: Menstruation, most likely a mention of racism bc i like to tackle issues head on, very very mild gore

Cormac is the softest little boy in town, let me TELL YOU.

I feel like he’d be so down for cuddles, or you just watching him fiddle with his technology.

Even if you understood jack shit about it, you’d put the effort in to learn about what polarizers are.

You’re an exchange student that knows NOTHING about the portal, you’re just from America.

On the day you arrive at Okeefee’s College, you were convinced you weren’t going to fit in.

You didn’t.

Half of the people there stared at you, and gawked at your accent, and how you enunciated your t’s and didn’t whistle your s’s.

Cormac was of course, out of the way, he’s not one to socialize, new student or not.

Of course, you were in the corner, even though you should’ve sat in the front of the class. Luckily enough, you didn’t have to do much, as new students always get a pass.

You stayed below the radar for the first couple days, and never seemed to notice Cormac looking at you in class, whenever you’d shy away from answering questions about yourself. He wasn’t too familiar with anyone too much different than the masses of the school, color, interest, speech.

You were thinking of taking the LONGEST of naps after your classes finished, but those plans were quickly changed. The both of you weren’t paying attention where you were walking.

He crashed into you to say the least, and the copy of “Astrophysics for People in a Hurry” fell out of your hands, your bookmark getting lost.

“Ah, I’m sorry about that. Wasn’t watching where I was-WAIT, you’re that new girl from America, aren’t ye?” Cormac said, readjusting his glasses. You nodded, and were perplexed at his new creation, it looked like a gramophone, but with a motherboard and an antenna.

He tried to hide it from you, but he saw your gaze constantly go back to the machine, even as he snapped in front of your face.

‘You alright there? Oh, you’re looking at this. You want to hang out with me over the weekend. Maybe you can catch up from your bookmark, while I work on this.”

You confirmed, and that’s how you two became polarizing pals.

Cormac may be smarter than the library, not the porridge one, and as quick as a whip, but do NOT be shocked. He is very socially inept, and a little behind on cues, and different things.

He almost touched your hair once, without your permission, but you stopped him right in his tracks.

“Cormac, do you want your hand maimed and chopped off, then hung from the top of the flagpole.” you said, giving him a death stare.

“N-no, I don’t. Did I do something wrong?” he asked, taking his hand away, putting it back on the screwdriver.

“Well, for starters, don’t touch my hair without my permission. It’s a no-no for all people, but for black people especially. We had to have our hair cut off completely. That was our culture, and it was ripped away because we were seen as less than, nothing but an animal. So, you, taking your hand, as clean as it may be, and putting it in the fruits of my ancestors’ labor. That’s disrespectful love.” you replied, turning a page.

He has no idea, (damn education system), but he continues to learn about different cultures, especially black culture, African-American culture. The War on Drugs. He comes to you close to every day with different factoids, a good amount of them you already know, but you’re still happy that he puts effort in.

He’s a very tall lad, so expect very warm hugs from him. After a long day of school, he walks over to you, wherever you may be, and hugs you, asking how your day was. You melt into the hug, and smile against him, marveling at how consistent he is.

In classes, if there’s an odd number of people left, it’s always you, he, and Hannah. Y’all get the work done quickly, and he even lets you join them when Orienteering.

Now, you’re one smart cookie. No matter race, everyone has the power to be as smart as they can be. As well as that, they can work damn hard to get there, through all the trouble and hatred. Every now and then, a teacher might shut you down. Ask Cormac if he knows, in which he responds, but always sends you a look of pity.

A teacher could go through all of the students in a class, and not get the right answer once, and your hand stayed up through every excruciating second of it. And, begrudgingly, the teacher asks you, in which you give the correct answer, and if even a *word* is out of place, you’re ridiculed.

That always tends to upset, you, ruffle your feathers, but you don’t give in, not until you’re alone, in your dorm. Crying at the unfairness, wishing it were different.

Or in Cormac’s arms, wetting his sweater, his brain moving a mile a minute to try to say the right thing. He always held you so gently, he’s used to it. His experiments could go wrong with a moment’s change. He’s used to being patient, and tender.

He’s always trying to ask you about life in America, trying to find out what you hated, what you loved. His curiosity was never ending, it seemed. Sometimes, though, he could get a little caught up with his words, and you’d giggle at him, and help him along. This typically happened when he was trying to ask you out to go to the courtyards, or to library dates. He’d sneak food to you, and you two would have picnics near the sheep.

Whenever there weren’t too many teachers around, and when Hannah was in Perth, you two would cuddle on the grass, and sneak cheek and hand kisses in every now and then.

He’s an EXCELLENT cuddler by the way, lots of space to appreciate.

He knew mostly where you would be, and you him, but every now and then, one of ye’ wouldn’t respond to emails, but it’s usually due to an upset stomach, or too much studying. This wasn’t going to be the case ever time.

You were usually very attentive during class, doing classwork, writing down notes. However, one of these days, Cormac could tell something was wrong. Your head was down, and your binder was pressed tightly against your abdomen. Every now and then, he saw you scrunch your face in what seemed like pain, but he couldn’t put his finger on what the problem was.

It was a Friday, so you were free, and you and Cormac had plans to sleep in, and have another sheep picnic. At the moment, however, all you wanted to do was take a big fat nap, and sleep through the weekend.

As soon as class ended, you bolted out of the door, and Cormac tried to catch up, but Tara teased him, saying that you’d finally grown up, and wanted someone better than him. Your body was still, however, in too much pain to do focus.

He tried to get to you, but you were moving too fast, already halfway up the steps. He saw a portion of your khaki skirt, was red, and he began getting concerned, thinking you had began dying.

When you finished your shower, and began soaking your skirt, gone but never forgotten, you saw a cluster of emails from Cormac, asking if you were okay, dead, angry at him. Or needed medical attention. You were brought to tears, and instructed him to meet you at 7:00p.m., in front of the boy’s shower room, typically where Cormac would take you to his room, where you’d fall asleep on his bed, book on top of your face. He’d want to take a picture, and did, leaving it above his bed.

He met with you, and when he asked you if you were okay, a particularly tough cramp hit you like a truck, causing you to crumble. You groaned at the pain, and Cormac followed you down, asking if you were okay.

“Cormac, I’m cramping, just some pain.” you whispered, holding back tears

“What’re the cramps from? You eat something weird?” he asked, looking at you with concern.

“No, I’m on my period.” you said, sitting on the cold floor.

“Oh, you mean...menstruation. When you shed your uterine lining because your egg wasn’t fertilized, so now it’s coming out of your...um...lady....parts.” he stuttered, a blush forming on his face, followed by a look of concern.

You laughed at his explanation, and confirmed his suspicions, until another cramp hit you.

“Oh goodness, you must be suffering. I’ve heard that menstrual cramps are sometimes as bad as heart attacks.” he said, beginning to rub your stomach, helping soothe the pain.

You nodded again, and he led you to his room, grabbing you spare chocolate from when you were craving due to PMS, (unknowingly). He heated up a towel, and tucked you into your sleeping bag, his parallel to yours.

Tears began to escape from your eyes from his gestures, and he reached over to dry them.

“It’s okay to cry. Especially if you’re in a lot of pain. I think that it’s absolute bollocks that you feel like there’s something wrong for you for simply being human. It’s like a punishment for not getting pregnant. You didn’t ask for it.” he replied, letting you lay on top of him for the time being.

You smiled against him, but sadly woke up to more bloody underwear, and realizing that you’d leaked on Cormac. You shook him awake, and he didn’t even begin to panic, handing you a pair of spares, and a product through the door.

“Just a bit o’ blood. Nothing bleach or peroxide can’t fix.” he said, hugging you once again.

Cormac is very hesitant to kiss you on the lips. You pecked him once, and that sent him up the wall. His ears turned even more red, and his cheeks lit up.

He responded to your laughter with multiple face kisses, eventually landing one at your lips, lingering for a moment.

You cheered for his confidence, and you two went to a picnic the next day, the sheep happy to have you two there.

You felt completely over the moon to have Cormac as your partner. Even if he was a little shit sometimes, you wouldn’t have him another way.

Masterlist

[sloshi]

Chapter 59 of Quietus (spoilers)

@angel-chu

WOWOWOOWOWOW!!!!!!!! THAT WAS MARVELOUS !!!!!!! First of all thank you so much again for pumping out these fantastic chapters, I squeal in delight everytime I get a notification update.

Let me just start off by saying I love Chiyo so much. Her character is so refreshing in a way, I don’t know how to explain it. She has this bizarre wisdom of a comforting grandma, but also the sternness of an old lady who would beat your ass with a sandal. And her “little king” title for Sasuke is so cute. But above all? I love that she addresses and scolds Sasuke for his pride—I love that she can see past his stubborn exterior to that naïve boy who thinks he can take the world on by himself.

But I felt so sad for him, his helplessness and his realization that he will now suffer for such a devastating mistake. And his reflection on Itachi? Why don’t u just shoot me in the fucking HEART. Lmfao, I was not expecting that tidbit but it fucking hurt. I was like

Sasuke’s emotions this chapter was honestly so damn heart wrenching. I feel like the curse mark really opened his eyes and now we’re getting a peek at his vulnerability, which is admittedly so attractive. As much as I adore Sasuke’s strength, his fear, worry, and misery make him so terribly human. Even as I was reading I could feel his growth & character development. LMAO Sasuke lowkey the moment he entered Chiyo’s hut:

BUT THE MENTION OF SAKURA!!!!!

When I tell you I had fucking butterflies the moment he thought about her in his mind... bruh. Nothing compares to that tingly feeling in your navel you get when you read something that has your stomach jumping. I feel like it’s been so long since Sasuke’s thoughts really lingered on Sakura, or as far as we know. It was a delightful surprise so I was like

I cannot wait for them to be together once more, if I’m already fangirling this hard over one tiny glimpse 💀💀💀 I’m going to explode into a million fireworks.

MOVING ON TO THAT AWESOMELY INTENSE ASS BATTLE SCENE !!!!!

In preparation I had watched bits and pieces of the Sasuke vs Killer B fight, so I was pleasently surprised when I could picture the fight so vividly in my mind!!! I knew exactly what scene you had mirrored/reflected and everything. LMFAO AND KILLER B’S RAPS OSNDKFNDKDNND THEY WERE FANTASTIC!!!! I know I’m not supposed to be rooting for him but I was lowkey like

The fight scene kept me so engaged, AND THE MUSIC YOU GAVE US!!!! I’m an absolute whore for cinematic music so you can imagine my thrill in listening to these new tracks. They’re so incredibly epic and fitting. I know you had said you were somewhat nervous about the whole fight scene but you delivered tenfold; it was fucking amazing. With all good stories, you always get to a point where you just forget you’re reading words and are completely absorbed by the movie in your head. That never fails to happen with your writing. Your style is both simple & sophisticated to a point where it just neatly flows without my mind having to do much work. You know how some stories you have to go back and reread to understand a certain scene, etc? With yours I don’t have to do that at all, ever. Except that one time of course, when Sakura had been escaping and her surprise plot had my mind fucking blown. (I was like hold tf up?? What??) the whole time I was reading the fight scene I was like

Can I also just say I totally see the smidgen of SuiKarin? I assume this is intentional and I’m not just reading too much into things but I can’t say for sure, but I can say that would actually be so cute. I’m here for it 100%

By the end of this chapter I was pretty worried about Sasuke. I still am worried about him. With the curse mark being activated I can’t help but think he might end up doing some fucked up shit like he did in the forest of death. Breaking limbs and whatnot like a psycho. And the whole syringe thing was so abrupt and unexpected, as soon as he plunged the syringe into his neck I was like

Fuck lmao. These next chapters are going to be wild, I can feel it in my bones. I hope you enjoy your break from writing, you deserve it!!!! We are all so thankful for what you’ve given us. Especially during these times!

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

[pasdedeux-archive]

𝐖𝐇𝐎 𝐍𝐄𝐄𝐃𝐒 𝐀 𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌? 𝐖𝐇𝐎 𝐍𝐄𝐄𝐃𝐒 𝐀𝐌𝐁𝐈𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍? — Thank you everyone who has applied !! You’re all amazing writers and quite honestly I had no less than three mental breakdowns during the deliberation period.

 To those who were not chosen, please know that this is not a mark against your writing or your characters. I loved them dearly and I would be such an honor if you wanted to join with a different muse. However, I know applications take a very long time and a lot of heart so I completely understand if you do not wish to do so.

With that said, congratulations to those who were accepted. Please make sure you look at the checklist, and send in your character account within 24 hours. I will be sending out discord invitation links tomorrow after I clean up the server a bit (aka making a guide on how we will be using discord to roll and such).

K playing Elizabeth Augusta Sinclair, the luminary; violinist for the Bolshoi Ballet

"It is summer, and the countryside is alive with birdsong and bloom, rays of golden light cascading, warm breeze dusting the ground with the caress of a lover. You are eight, stumbling through the knee high fields of flowers, laughter light and joyful, Aestas come down to Earth."

I loved your portrayal of Elizabeth. Half ghost half girl, there is something incredibly provocative in the way in which she tries to become all that she thinks she can be. I was listening to Swan Lake Act II. No. 10. during your muse sample and it ended just as I finished reading it. Coincidence? I think not. Elizabeth will make a wonderful addition to the group, and I cannot wait to see how her story plays out. I've been thinking about potential subplots for her and wowie my brains a racing.

Amy playing Yelena Andreyevna Kusnetsova, tbd.

“In years past, she’d been able to push down the worry that she was missing out in some way. That true freedom of expression had eluded her, for reasons that had nothing to do with how hard she worked. Often, she’d even convinced herself that she didn’t need freedom at all.”

Yelena has such a presence about her that I can't help but be enamored with her. There is a wistfulness in everything she does, but it does not slow her down. In fact, I would argue it makes her all the more present. She reminds me of a deer, ephemeral but wise and always on the lookout for potential danger. For a person such as herself, I see the workings of a woman afraid to die and afraid of the life she has already been living. Yelena will be such a treat to see develop and I cannot wait to see what kind of shenanigans occur during the story!

Nayab playing Hana Volkova, the veiled; soloist at the bolshoi theater

“It is to no music her wings spread, and she is commanded to fly. In a single, suspended moment in time, Volkov leeches from the depths of her, everything the art once meant to her. Its purity is tainted, and if her heart had not already lost all faith, the sicles Volkov aims to her heart and pierces her with surely bleed her dry of the blood of love.”

When Hana was given a buffet in front of her as threat toward her compliance that pierced me like a knife. Her demotion to soloist as punishment for stepping out of line I think is a beautiful analogy for how girls like her aren't meant to last long: they're meant to be sacrificial pawns so that others may endure and to think that one can be anything other than that is a mistake. Loss which permeates all of one's being is meant to hurt, and Hana has demonstrated one way of being resilient.

Esme playing Marilyn Campbell, the maelstrom; corpse de ballet at NYCB

“You once told a story to your brother, told him that if the sea claims you, it drags you so far away from the shore that you turn into a deadly fish, a fish that could devour the entire world.”

Marilyn is the perfect storm, ready to consume all that which does not heed her. I love how you portrayed her resignation to what she is, and perhaps what she thinks is all that she will ever be, but even her doubts are thwarted by her want, her consuming desire, to become someone else. Much like the Bermuda Triangle, she may be a touch auspicious, but people cannot help but want to be pulled into her destruction. I love the ideas you have for her plot development and I can't wait to see how it all unfolds.

Georgia playing Fred Baker, the insurgent; head of security at the NYCB

“The brothers bought a radio before they did a bed.”

First of all, holy shit I loved your memes they were. Oh my god, so funny. When I go over apps the first thing I do is look at the meme section, and let me tell you — just that little bit you gave me enticed me to want to know more about Fred. When I finally began to read him my heart SWOONED. Do you hear me? Swooned. He's such an interesting character, filled to the brim with animosity and hurt — he deals with his past the best way he can. I also cannot wait until Fred introduces everyone to the soul of America with his love for jazz.

Taryn playing  Zinaida Petrovna Sabitova, the sacred; principal dancer at the bolsoi theater

“Still, there are some evenings when her mother looks over from her place at the vanity, still all-over aside from the wafts of smoke burning from her cigarette, and seems to be studying her own child. Looking for something. Wondering.”

You wrote in your application is Zinaida good or evil, Odette or Odile — and while I do not have an answer for you right now, I do know that I would love to explore that with you. She's a beautiful girl whose life is tragic in the way only fairy tales can be. The perfect Jewel of Moscow (I did like that name), who while controlled by those above her wishes for her own happy ending despite knowing that her end will be nothing less than fatalistic. Her aversion toward things which reminds her of her own mortality hits home, omg, yes, why must I have this human body. Why must I suffer having lived.

Anna playing Yelena Yuryevna Min, the dream; corpse de ballet at the bolshoi theater

“What Yelena didn’t remember was the hushed arguments her parents would have every other night before he left – how he would say with so much conviction even as her mother begged him not to, “things will be better for us if the state knows we’ll die for her.”

AHHH, that broke me, that line right there broke me. I can so ardently feel the love and happiness her family gave her, their precious daughter, and how they would do anything to give her the world she deserves. Then you went on to talk about her apprehension to go to Vagnova, and my world turned upside down. Her disposition really speaks to me, and her family ties as well. She's also a breath of fresh air, like a sunflower in a meadow that had recently rained. Her optimism and kind disposition really shines through in your app and in your memes.

Claudia playing Eva Miro, the swan; principal dancer at the NYCB

“but lena understood sacrifice, she saw it every day when her mother would come home exhausted, weathered hands cracked and aching so she wouldn’t go hungry. to love something meant giving everything you had, everything you were or could ever be, to feed that love.”

Gonna start my little tangent with wow, your mood-board :cheff kiss: absolute perfection. I don't use extras as a basis for my decision making, merely something I admire from afar, but damn — if I did yours would no doubt be at the front of the line. There were two parts of your application that I wanted to highlight, and the other was half your application lmao. Your muse sample really expanded your character and showed me how much of a Swan Eva can be. I called the Swan skeleton a starling at the beginning, a bird which choses their survival above all else. A transformation of a girl into a star, Eva is a force which cannot be tamed unless you destroy her.

V playing Alina Vasilieva Filippova, the tbd; ballet master-repetiteur at the bolshoi theater

“She remembers thinking: ‘this will not be the end’.”

All ballet dancers in this RP live and breathe ballet, but Alina is in a realm of her own. I loved how you wrote her to be a ballet master, someone who would put aside their pride of being a "former prima ballerina" to now teaching a group of dancers because ballet is all that she is. Your muse sample really showed me the intense power of a woman who knows what she wants, and who she is — even if all she believes herself to be is something irrevocably intertwined with ballet. I'm very excited to see the relationship she forms with her dancers and with those who are from out of the Union. I'm particularly interested in her second plot development point and would love to explore that in game.

Abby playing Viktor Antonievich Vasylenko; the raconteur, pianist for the bolshoi ballet

No, Viktor had fashioned the resentment into an albatross of his own, hanging limp and heavy from his neck.

What can I say about Viktor other than I'm a fan. He's so gentle and yet so resilient, a mess of cacophonous sounds that melds into a beautiful sonata. There's pain in him, a ghost which lingers from his past, and while resigned to perhaps eternal disappointment he continues. I loved the way in which you developed his reason / background for being in the Bolshoi Theater when he himself could have been a star — still strives to be actually: but more resigned this time in his ambition. I loveee Viktor and I can't wait to see how he develops.  

     — 𝐈𝐍 𝐒𝐔𝐌𝐌𝐀𝐑𝐘

Principal Dancer: Zinadia, Eva, Soloist: Hana, Yelena (tbd)* Corpse de Ballet: Yelena (dream) , Marilyn Violinist: Elizabeth Bodyguard: Fred Ballet Master: Alina Pianist: Viktor * still talking to writer about a few details.

[teenremus]

meeting sirius black / asking you out would include...

a/n: idk why i’m having so much trouble writing lmao oopsies it’s been a hot minute. i’ve had 0 motivation for 0 reason anyway here u go request something pls :)

gryffindor!reader

- he had his eye on you since the sorting hat ceremony

- he thought you were. so cute. and you being placed in the same house was him was just all the better

- while he had had interest, he didn't see you much after that first day and forgot about you

- until fifth year

- you were in the same potions class

- of course, it had been a while

- it wasn't until the middle of first term when he recognized you

- after dicking around with remus in the back of the class, the two of them were separated

- and your usual partner, severus, had gotten replaced

- you didn’t really know severus, besides the snide comments you’d received from him on more than one occasion

- but you weren’t too ecstatic about sirius either

- you prepared yourself for the most excruciating annoyance for a lifetime

- but it wasn’t that bad ??? surprise surprise

- it took a moment for him to piece together where he knew you from

- but when he placed it, he smirked to himself, although you didn’t seem too keen on talking to him with your head in a textbook

- he found it uncomfortably silent

- “i’m sirius, love.”

- “y/n.” you didn’t look up

- “love sounds better.”

- you hated that you blushed, but you did

- you told yourself it was just some pickup line

- but he had genuine interest in you

- it showed every day

- he’d keep talking to you

- and you started to warm up to him more and more

- not only metaphorically, but physically

- his constant compliments made your stomach do jumping jacks

- remus sat behind you during all that time

- and was getting increasingly annoyed at the slow burn

- “you going to ask her out, mate, or are you sitting around waiting for someone else to?”

- “oh, piss off, moony”

- that made him nervous though

- and he started to notice the lingering gazes from some ravenclaw fellow in your class

- when he watched him graze your hand to reach a jar of dried bat wings, he was fed up he got jealous a little too easily

- when you came back with the jars of ingredients, he spoke immediately

- “what do you think about going out with me?”

- “pardon me?”

- “what would you think of you and me getting together?”

- “i think it would be nice”

- “good”

- “so are you asking me or not, wanker?”

- “well, yeah. i thought that was clear enough.”

slytherin!reader

- you knew who sirius was

- of course you knew who sirius was

- the blood trailer your house mates had shit talked into oblivion

- and while you weren't a believer that he was a blood traitor, you did believe he was complete and utter arse

- you'd been witness of him every day leaning against one of the doors to the great hall, with a different girl

- when quidditch season started up, you had joined the team

- and after an interaction on a training field, you had learned he was on his team as well

- it was a screaming match between your team captain and his

- you had to diffuse the situation

- “michael, come on, we still have time later. we don’t have a match for a few weeks. let it go.”

- you quite literally had to pull him away

- you made eye contact with sirius and james as you turned him away, and did your best to ignore the arrogant smirks that blanketed their thankfulness

- you saw him up close again at the match against gryffindor, standing across from each other and not breaking eye contact as the ref read out the rules

- once in the air, the game had been going swimmingly

- gryffindor - 7, slytherin - 10

- the game had traveled up farther in the sky with each point gained, the crowd could barely see you anymore with the amount of clouds

- it was a struggle in getting the quaffle

- “woah! guys, look out!” someone screamed

- you stopped your broom in its place and looked to see that everyone else had done the same, and you wondered what was going on

- you looked up, and saw somebody falling

- “holy shit, that’s sirius!” it was another gryffindor you couldn’t place

- no one was making any moves to save him, some continuing on with the game and snatching quaffles again— he kept falling

- “ah, bloody hell”

- you dropped the quaffle that had been tucked under your arm and quickened your broom’s pace as you dove down to catch him

- he was just beneath your grasp, your fingers barely touching his uniform

- when you finally got ahold of the fabric, he almost pulled you down with him

- you moved your grip to his forearm instead, and stopped your broom from diving down any further, or in just a few seconds you’d end up hitting the ground

- you were sure he’d be passed out

- but apparently not

- he brushed his hair out of his face with his free hand, then held onto the broom as he looked up

- “seems ive fallen for you, y/n.”

- “that is,,, absurdly lame, sirius.”

ravenclaw!reader

- it was through detention, of course

- you’d never noticed him because you’d been sleeping

- but he knew you

- or at least, he knew of you

- he thought you were so beautiful and he truly wondered how you kept getting into detention like this

- but he wasn’t complaining

- he rarely saw you outside of whatever classroom confined the two of you, so he knew what you were doing wasn’t as much of a spectacle as his pranks were

- could’ve been cheating, he considered

- but you were a ravenclaw, he figured it was doubtful

- sirius has never spoken a word to you, by the time he had reached detention each day you were already asleep. when it was time to leave, you were one of the first to escape

- until detention was held by professor binns 

- he took wands, homework, any sources of happiness or busy work for the students to do

- including sleeping

- he wanted you to suffer in boring, magic-less silence with nothing to do but stare at the walls

- sirius was not having it

- when he got bored, he got really annoying

- he just kept asking questions

- “what’s the capital of the moon?”

- “do you reckon dumbledore keeps quills in his beard? as well as all the crumbs, of course.”

- it went on

- the continuous detentions was worth seeing you smile, even if it was beneath your hand

- you wondered if this was what you were missing out on all the times you slept

- when sirius wasn’t looking at you, you were looking at him, taking in his features

- he had almost caught you

- james definitely caught you

- but didn’t say anything, just winked in your direction to let you know he knew

- when james didn’t show up one day, sirius was alone

- or would have been, if he hadn’t sat down next to you

- “so, what’re you in for?”

- “would you believe me if i told you filch doesn’t like it when his office is broken into for fireworks?”

- he leaned back in his chair, almost impressed “hm. impressive............... but-“

- there was a long pause, and he pulled himself up again and rested his elbow on the table as he looked at you

- “i know a place you can get them for free. hogsmeade with me this weekend?”

- mcgonagall’s shushing broke the conversation

- silence again, just for a moment before she looked down at her desk

- “i’d love to.”

hufflepuff!reader

- he had run into you on the courtyard

- or rather, spotted you

- yelling unintelligibly at someone

- which is not what he expected from a hufflepuff

- a crowd was formed around you, occasional flinches as your wand waved around

- he weaseled his way through the crowd with his mates with a smile on his face, ready to spot some action

- he spotted the back of your head, arms flailing wildly as you yelled at an annoyed, but taken aback, severus snape over his continuous racist and arrogant comments about everyone and everything in the world

- which just made it even better

- sirius was losing his mind

- he had to hold onto james and remus as he laughed

- with an off insult saying "your nose is more inflated than your ego" and the accidental wave of your wand, a white spark had come out of it

- the rooting and howls of laugher had stopped all around the formed circle

- james, peter, remus and sirius has stopped as well and froze where they stood

- severus looked beyond your shoulder in shock and a smile crawled up his face

- you turned around quickly, mouth drawn open when you realized you had cast something

- a boy with dark hair was behind you, hands over his face

- when he pulled them away, his eyes were crossed in awe as he looked down at his nose

- it was twisting and turning, as it grew bigger and bigger and took up more of his face

- severus was laughing now

- “shut it” you said quickly, a short wave of your arm his lips were gone and replaced with nothing but skin

- his shouts were muffled and ignored

- “oh, my merlin. i am so, so sorry-“

- he started to laugh

- so hard he had to close his eyes

- his friends laughed with him

- “you’re laughing? you alright? that spell didn’t get to your head, did it?”

- he looked at your face for the first time

- oh, merlin, he didn’t expect you to be so pretty

- he was not ready

- this beautiful girl so worried and pampering him

- “is that your nose or are you just happy to see her, mate?” peter whispered, trying to hold back his laughter

- james was quick to speak when sirius couldn’t find his voice

- “oi! i think he deserves an escort to madame pomfrey, yeah?”

- “yeah, he’s not looking too well!” remus chimed in

- you began to walk him to the nurse, trying your hardest not to stare down the elephant on his face in the room

- “i’m y/n.”

- “i’m sirius.”

- his voice was more nasal than usual

- madame pomfrey was annoyed more than anything, but the trip lasted no more than a few minutes before his nose was back to normal

- you looked at him

- he was cuter without an absurdly large nose

- it was easier to see how the light caught in his eyes now

- “i’m so sorry-“

- “don’t worry about it, love. make it up to me with a trip to hogsmeade?”

- you were caught incredibly off guard

- “yes, i mean, yes. of course.”

[lightsandlostbells]

Druck season 3, episode 1 reaction

WE DID IT, KIDS. When Druck’s first season aired, I knew shortly after Matteo’s introduction that I could not wait for his season. But with that came a lot of apprehension that we would ever get Matteo’s season - Druck S1 got less attention than some of the other remakes, and for a long time, the fandom didn’t know if the show would get a S2, let alone S3. Months went by with no official news of when the show would return. Many people thought the show had been quietly cancelled. 

And then, finally, Mia’s season was announced. Ratings and subscribers grew substantially. Druck trended frequently on YouTube and Tumblr. Then finally, we got confirmation that S3 was in the works. So here we are, and to put it politely, my ass is on fire. 

Episode 1

Clip 1 - Matteo’s miserable night

Party time! This opening is pointedly sexual, with the music (”You’re turning me on”) and the dancing, with the closeups of boobs and butts and writhing bodies. Sara gets freaky with a banana. The presence of sex makes sense to highlight Matteo’s alienation, as we see him sitting on the couch, not participating. He’s disengaged from the flirtation and seduction, this isn’t something he wants to be a part of.

Is the guy dancing with Hans the turtleneck dude, or is that someone else? PLOT TWIST: he was never Matteo’s love interest, despite fan theories. He was Hans’ love interest all along!

Matteo gets up, trying to escape this scene that makes him uncomfortable. But Sara pulls him into a dance (much like she’s going to be playing the role of Emma this season, pulling Matteo back into an attempt at a straight relationship). They kiss, and he’s soooo not into it, hugging her and staring over her shoulder into space like she’s his great-aunt who smells like mothballs and he can’t wait to get the fuck out of this family reunion.

He escapes into the bathroom where the boy squad is smoking weed. Carlos showing the boys a sex position on his phone. I’m sure Matteo loves hearing about that. He’s getting high as the boys debate the mechanics of this man-woman sex position. The proper response, honestly.

Oh my God, Carlos just called Kiki a catheter. He meant cathetus. I don’t think you’re ready to integrate catheters into your sex life, dude. 

Matteo looks dead. I know he’s getting high, but this kid looks fucking deceased. Someone revive him already.

When he realizes he has three calls from Kiki, Carlos pulls up Jonas and Abdi, saying they’re going to go hook up with girls. An activity that I’m sure Matteo wants to participate in. Matteo lingers behind. He just seems so wiped. He looks at himself in the mirror and it’s as if he’s disappointed in what he sees.  (The way it’s shot makes his mirror image divided down the middle, like he’s a fractured person.) I’ve seen some later episodes by this point and Matteo seems like he’s really struggling with anxiety, like he just needs to escape sometimes, it all gets overwhelming.

The girl Jonas is dancing with kinda reminds me of Sonja (similar-ish haircut).

HOLY FUCK DID MATTEO JUST PUT THE WEED IN AMIRA’S BACKPACK???? Matteo, that is TOTALLY the worst an Isak has been about this, planting weed on on a person rather than a vase. I guess he assumes a Muslim girl in hijab seems like an unlikely candidate to have drugs, but ... dude. Asshole move. And I wouldn’t trust the authorities not to search the Muslim girl’s belongings for discriminatory reasons, anyway, which would have made it even worse.

Photoshop Markus is at this party and Matteo tells the cops Markus is the renter, LMAO GOD. Matteo is just snaking all over the place tonight. The cops tell everyone to turn the music down, which is pretty reasonable and not nearly as bad as them telling people to break up the party. Or maybe I’m just old. Carlos salutes as the cops leave, heh.

Amira just walks out with her backpack … and the weed. Lol, she might’ve just left because the cops showed up and she figured better to bail now, not wanting to get in trouble, or because she had a curfew or something, but part of me wants to believe she knew Matteo stuck weed in her backpack and she’s walking out to make him suffer. In that case: he deserves it, make him suffer.

Mia wasn’t at the party. I guess she and Alexander were making their own fun, but her presence is missed.

Clip 2 - Survival camp

Matteo’s new room is already a little messy, with beer bottles and remnants of the party. He wakes up and checks his phone, he’s got a Bible verse from mom. One that sounds normal and non-threatening enough, not like it’s about sin and hellfire, but you know. All religious texts are probably loaded coming from Matteo’s mom.

Matteo rolls over and Jonas is conked out in bed next to him. Oh nooooo, my heart. Matteo watches him and then reaches out and slooooowly lowers his hand to lightly touch Jonas’ curls, closing his eyes a little. GODDAMMIT.

If he doesn’t do this to Gereven at some point, touch his hair without having to be secretive about it, then I’m suing Druck.

You can tell Matteo is indulging in this fantasy that Jonas is his boyfriend and he’s waking up next to him, and the fantasy is broken when he looks down and sees that Jonas has a phone number with a little heart written on his arm. A girl. Jonas will never be his boyfriend.

Although I almost don’t think this is specifically about Matteo pining over Jonas - I think there’s definitely some lingering feelings, enough to be disappointed that Jonas might have a girl, but I also think it’s just the wish that Matteo can have this experience with a guy at all, he can wake up next to a boy who’s not just a friend, who he can touch and show affection to. 

The fantasy is further interrupted when Hans walks in (the dreamy music cuts off) and Matteo rolls on his back like he’s totally not staring wistfully at Jonas. Hans throws himself on the bed between them in a perfect face plant, lmao. 

Hans asks Matteo to buy rolls, saying Mia would’ve done that. Hans, if you are expecting Matteo to be a Mia substitute, you are setting yourself up for disappointment. I don’t think Matteo will lovingly wipe your vomit off the tub. (I mean. Maybe when he falls in love and is in just that good of a mood.)

Jonas asks why Hans is in Matteo’s bed, and Hans says he could ask Jonas the same question (DAMN) but Jonas is like … I’ve waited for you. He and Hans stare into each other’s eyes. Lmao, the way their gaze holds without comment or them breaking it off. I’m sure Matteo just loves seeing them “flirt.” But I don’t think the fantasy of Jonas in his bed involves Hans, sorry Hans. Matteo gets up to buy rolls, just to get away from the JoHans lovefest, I guess.

Linn comes in and says she wants to make pancakes but doesn’t know where the pans are, and she doesn’t know how to make pancakes either. Everyone in this flat is screwed without Mia. But Jonas offers to make pancakes, so all is saved! Matteo grumpily leaves Jonas, Hans, and Linn to take a selfie of their “survival camp” to send to Mia, showing they’re totally making it on their own. They look so perky, heh. They won’t be so perky when Jonas leaves and takes his pancake-making skills with him.

Matteo steps outside and gets a text from Sara about whether he slept well. I feel bad for Sara. She’s not just the Emma equivalent, she’s a character we’ve seen in the past who has been entertaining and likable. I don’t want to see her either make Emma’s mistakes like outing Matteo OR get her heart broken by him.

 Hans throws Matteo’s wallet out of the window, beaning him in the head, which is truly the perfect gif.

Clip 3 - Will you surrender?

Matteo goes into school on a rainy Monday morning. We start with some passionate straight kissing in the foreground, coupled with a pic and text from Sara, just to show the kind of shit Matteo is dealing with. A heterosexual assault from all angles. 

He meets up with the boy squad. Jonas is looking to get with Linn’s friend, who is “Emma Watson but blonde.” Sucks for Matteo to hear yet more girl talk, and girl talk from Jonas specifically. The heterosexuality strikes from another corner.

Adding another unwanted conversation topic, Abdi asks about the weed. Matteo seems like he wants to get the hell out of there, so he bails and goes up to Hanna and Sam, asking where Amira is. She’s out sick, so solving the weed dilemma will have to wait another day.

Hanna glances over at Jonas, who finally seems to have snapped out of his S2 funk as he talks about his new girl … does Hanna know yet Jonas has a new flame? Or is she just suspicious?

Man, I keep saying it, but Matteo seems like he’s sleepwalking through life, like this kid is just. Legit depressed. He has no energy for anything. Not even to fake being OK.

Continuity snarl: Matteo puts up his hood as he rounds the corner after leaving the girls, but it’s down a moment later.

The music is kicking in and there’s still almost a minute of clip left, is Matteo going to like … literally run into Beanie Boy/Gereven?

YEP

Well, they didn’t do a rom-com Meet Cute collide into each other or anything, but they passed each other in the hallway! In slow motion!

The big moment: Matteo and Gereven are coming at each other from different sides (like different ~walks of life? ooooo). They lock eyes and then look back at each other once after they’ve passed.

The scene goes into slow motion as soon as Matteo lifts his head and sees Beanie Boy. Matteo is just ambling his way to class and meandering through life, but when he sees that guy, that’s when he starts to feel present in the world, like it’s not just around him but including him. And then Gereven comes into focus as they pass each other.

I adore the music choice for this moment. It’s beautiful, and the lyrics are so lovely. “Will you surrender?” when we see Gereven and Matteo looking at each other, because Matteo’s seeing the boy who will make him give in and stop hiding who he truly is, who will make him surrender to love. And I suspect the same is true for Gereven, that Matteo will make him surrender as will, let go of his fears. 

So I reaaaaally don’t think Beanie Boy was trying to get Matteo’s attention like Even was. There’s nothing about it that suggests so. My prediction is that Beanie Boy, like Matteo was trying to keep his head down and get through life, and they just happened to walk by each other. I mean, Matteo’s just walking down a school hallway, it’s not like Beanie Boy parked his ass deliberately somewhere so Matteo could see him, he couldn’t predict Matteo was going to walk down that hallway at that particular time. I feel like Beanie Boy is very much like Matteo in that he’s lonely and an outsider. He’s not trying to attract attention, he’s not seen smiling or laughing at someone at the beginning. Our first glance at Even was his brightness. Our first glimpse of Gereven (from Matteo’s POV, not the brief moment of him last season which is more of an Easter egg, really) has him in dark clothes, headphones on. I feel like he and Matteo are just checked out of life. And I think that’ll be an interesting take on Even, not so much that Beanie Boy has Even’s confidence and swagger in drawing Matteo to him, but that Matteo and Gereven are both outsiders and recognize their loneliness in each other.

That’s what really makes me love this scene. It’s just a mundane occurrence. Two boys walking by each other. Something that happens all the time. Something that Matteo no doubt does every day, walk by other boys whose faces don’t register. But this time, there’s ... something. Physical attraction? Sure, that’s part of it. But even more I think it’s a sense of connection, something inexplicable that draws them to look back at each other even when the moment should have ended. A gut feeling that this person is also lost, that he would understand. 

Clip 4 - Everyone’s favorite reluctant friendship begins

It’s the first remake to focus on the teacher’s nipples! Matteo is staring at them instead of listening to her talk about their exams. 

Amira comes in and Matteo just gets up from where he was sitting and sits next to her while the teacher is talking. Lol, is that allowed? Is this a study session or something?

Amira coolly ignores Matteo even when he tries to get her attention. Eventually she says she found his weed and how fucked up it was for him to do that, she could have gotten in trouble. A bit of a change because Sana was upset that Isak almost fucked over Eva, causing a demonstration of Sana’s loyalty to her friends. With Amira, it was personal, a risk to herself. Matteo acts shitty too, he’s just like come on, it wasn’t personal, it wasn’t a big deal. Dude! If you want your weed back, that’s not the best course of action. You need to grovel.

The teacher calls on Matteo and Jonas shoots him an entertained look, like ha ha, you got in trouble. Or probably, more ha ha, check out our teacher’s nips. Nice display of Jonas going for that hetero bro bonding that Matteo would love to avoid.

LMAO, when Matteo asks for the week back and Amira says, “What will I get for it?” Matteo is like “IDK, blowjob?” THIS KID. His mind went to that, huh. Remember Even was all “yeah, we had to suck dicks” without two minutes of meeting Isak? And then later Eskild told Isak that talking about sucking dick when you meet someone is a sign someone’s gay? Yeah. 

Amira says she’ll give the weed back if Matteo and his boys join the abi-prank committee. Didn’t they do that last season? The copies of the boobs and butts and Jonas’ dick, didn’t that count as the prank?

The teacher makes them study partners. So far, she’s not a racist, at least? Anyway, Amira and Matteo look positively thrilled to be paired together; meanwhile Jonas is flirting with his seat partner. Oh, maybe that’s what the Look was about. Matteo continues to be pelted with heterosexuality like rotten fruits and vegetables.

Clip 5 - Matteo gets a prom date

Matteo and Sara sit on opposite sides of the bed, texting their friends, on their phones. LMAO, sounds about right, tbh. Truly scorching chemistry. Nah, it’s very Isak and Eskild.

The boys’ group chat has Jonas saying he’s getting laid on Friday. That rotten hetero produce comes in the form of eggplant emojis. Matteo sure loves hearing about Jonas banging chicks!  He’s like, yeah, I’m totally having sex with a girl as well.

Sara asks his opinion about a dress. Subtle (“subtle”) hint about the prom? Yes, as it turns out. But she suddenly leans over and kisses him after he’s like yeah, that looks nice. He looks as excited as you’d expect. He was actually staring into space before she did that.

Sara gets a text, Matteo wants to know what they’re talking about, and there’s some “flirting” until Sara caves and tells him that Leonie likes the new guy from their PE class. GEE I WONDER WHO THAT COULD BE. Matteo offers to investigate for her. Yeah, I’ll bet he’s gonna enjoy that more than he knows. He’s going to become one of the Hardy Boys.

Sara somewhat nervously asks if they should go to prom together, and when Matteo is agrees, she asks whether they’re a thing. It makes me sad how clearly vulnerable she is right now, like she really likes him and is hoping to say yes, but she isn’t sure. Matteo says they’re a thing. Not conveying how utterly miserable this must make him, but not exactly jumping for joy, either. Like Isak tried hard to impress Emma, he could turn on the charm, but Matteo is just sleepy about it.

Sara kisses Matteo again, but before they go further, he asks if she wants to watch a movie with him. Smart move.

I’m sure Matteo will end up going to prom with Gereven. Sara and Leonie can go together? Realizing their love for each other at last. Or just as friends. (But preferably girlfriends.)

Clip 6 - Make a wish

Matteo goes to the abi-prank meeting, looking like he gives nary a fuck. Amira shoots him a nod and he gives her a “what more do you want from me” look. The girls are at the meeting, the rest of the boy squad is not, obviously. I see Photoshop Markus but not Beanie Boy.

All the girls are looking beautiful by the way. Look at Amira, she’s radiant!

Kiki literally goes Fight Club on this meeting. I have to say, if you asked me which Druck character would be a member of Fight Club, it would be Kiki. Her clumsy nervousness is a total front for bloodlust.

Matteo is being rude as hell just taking out his phone while Kiki is talking. The boys text why they aren’t there: Jonas has a date, Kiki is still mad at Carlos (dude, that’s why you need to come, it’s a way to get back on her good side) and Abdi just forgot.

They suggest a flash mob. Lmao, good luck getting Matteo to dance. Or they suggest just randomly hugging teachers. That could get all kinds of awkward, judging by the last teacher we saw with the power nipples. I’m just imagining some short kid going for a hug and getting their face mashed into the teacher’s areola.

Photosohp Markus has a suggestion. I love this dude, sorry. He loves hugging! He wants to practice with Kiki. Kiki realizes in an instant why the hugging prank might not be the best idea. But she’s like, we can group bond instead. Kiki wants everyone to hold hands and Matteo just peaces the fuck out. This prank meeting is pretty depressing, honestly. Way more so than kosegruppa. Kosegruppa might have been uncool or whatever but I got the sense the people involved enjoyed it. This meeting was just excruciating, and barely anyone is there. Look at that tiny circle.

Oh shit! As Matteo exits the room, Beanie Boy is going into it, and Matteo stops him. No, don’t go in there, it’s dangerous! Or actually it just sucks and they’re doing a trust circle where they hold hands. Beanie Boy obviously does not want to hold hands in that room, since Matteo is out here and not in there.

Aww, I love that Matteo has a slight smile? Just the tiniest when he talks to Beanie. Beanie is kinda doing the talking with his eyes, he’s definitely considering Matteo.

Shit, it’s Matteo who offers weed! Matteo is the one being the initiator! The bolder one. I love the idea of maybe having a shyer Even, like it does drastically change their dynamic, but I’m fine with that as long as the show does a thorough job of adapting their interactions, not just a cut and paste. Beanie Boy is the new kid and probably didn’t expect someone to make overtures of friendship (or more…).

And I love Matteo doing this when we’ve seen him sleepwalking through his interactions with Sara and … everyone else, kinda. He’s actually found some courage. Like he could have just let Beanie Boy go off and do his own thing, there was no real reason to offer a joint once he’d warned him off the meeting. But he somehow just felt the need to keep talking to this dude.

Holy fuck, MATTEO putting the joint behind his ear. This role reversal is so much fun already. And it’s even more amusing if you think that this is how some of Evak played out from Even’s POV? We thought Even was this charming, suave, mysterious dude when he stuck that joint behind his ear, because we were in Isak’s POV and Even was some handsome stranger. Later we realize what a huge dork Even is and that he was super desperate to get Isak’s attention and had been pining since the first day of school. So this is like how Even actually was - we know Matteo is a big dork and not a suave dude, but maybe that’s how he comes across in Beanie Boy’s eyes. 

HIS NAME IS DAVID. A perfectly excellent name, tbh. I was worried they were going to call him something like Daniel or Noah, names that already exist in the Skam universe, which would be confusing as hell when those Noorhelm seasons are concurrently airing. “I can’t believe that thing Noah just did in this clip.” Uhhhh which Noah are you talking about, untagged post? Or God forbid, another Lucas, although David’s actor is named Lukas so I figured we would dodge that bullet.

Although it does occur to me that we have do have a David, the Skam France director, soooo … fuck.

I want to make a disclaimer: as fandom knows, David is played by a trans actor. There’s no guarantee that this character will be trans yet, but I think it’s unlikely that they won’t bring it up. The nature of this show seems like they’ll incorporate it into the story rather than let the opportunity pass to talk about trans issues, and I know that trans Druck fans campaigning for a trans Even had a ton to do with this decision, so I believe their input would weigh on the story itself beyond the casting. So I’m going to make speculation and comments with the assumption that David is trans and how that will affect the plot. There are things in this conversation that are potentially relevant to that, for instance. I don’t want to overstep, but I also don’t want to ignore moments of possible foreshadowing or pieces that might be relevant to his characterization.

So for instance, I don’t know if they have replaced Even being bipolar with David being trans. To be clear, NOT because being trans is a mental illness but more as an area of societal marginalization that the character has to deal with, that might be hidden from the other characters and the audience. We don’t know when we will learn that David is trans; while I write this we’re several episodes in, but I don’t know if we’ll learn three clips from now or three episodes from now. I don’t know if David will be trans and bipolar, or just one of the two. I don’t know if the reveal will end up being casual and non-dramatic, or if it will be a big thing like the end of episode 8. I have some guesses about where the story might go, but I’m keeping in mind that there’s a new element that none of the Evak seasons have tackled before, and that may cause big changes to the story. 

Matteo asks David about being new so close to Abi, and David says he killed someone and had to go into hiding. That could be a reference to his dead name. I don’t know if that term is the same in German, but seems like a possible hint. He does say he killed his parents, but that’s after Matteo asks if he had stress with them, so he’s just riffing off what Matteo said. Or just the fact that when Matteo asks about him being new, David wants to know why - maybe he’s wondering if Matteo knows something or heard a rumor. 

Isak asking about Even transferring in his final year got cut off because Emma showed up. Here Matteo just kinda accepts David’s joke and doesn’t question him further.

Matteo is super into him, of course. Look at that body language, he’s all angled toward David. David, too. Tarjei and Henrik had masterful body language so this is very promising.

David points out an eyelash on Matteo’s face and you fucking KNOW later in the season he probably won’t ask, he’ll just brush it off himself. Matteo is like, can I make a wish now? JFC, Matteo is flirting so much, he is intensely looking at David when he says that. Honestly, it’s really exciting to see this dynamic kinda flipped, mixing and matching Isak and Even elements between Matteo and David. David says it was just an eyelash. Maybe he’ll be more of the realist rather than the romantic? God, if Matteo is the more romantic one, I will lose my mind (in a good way).

David does ask what Matteo’s wish would have been, and Matteo is like, IDK, go on holiday or something. David says he knows the feeling and Matteo asks where he would go. Matteo would get in a car and just drive away. David says to go directly to Detroit. David, I’m fond of you already but unless your car turns into a submarine that is not gonna work.

David has been pretty chill so far, but he perks up and smiles when mentioning Detroit at the very end, so Matteo gets hit with the ray of charm. That’s when the music kicks in, too, because Matteo has seen David smile. No turning back now. I presume we are going to be hearing music from Detroit artists this season?

LMAO, I was like oh, Sara’s not there at the meeting so she can’t interrupt their moment, and yet SOMEHOW she managed to anyway. And she kisses Matteo so David knows Matteo has a girlfriend right off the bat. David takes this as his cue to exit.

Why was Sara there, anyway? Did she show up late for the Abi prank meeting? Didn’t she just do a big prank where she photocopied her boobs for the school to see? Or did she just know that’s where Matteo was headed tonight and she waited around for him?

For Matteo, Sara’s arrival cuts into this charged moment with David. With David, it’s a little less intense than Isak finding out about Sonja? Because he’s only shared a few minutes now with Matteo instead of stalking him for a week and then spending hours at his house, although obviously he could be crushing on him for a while already. Though personally I think they might eliminate that part of the story. Anyway, this is like … a spark of hope getting extinguished REALLY early and it makes me wonder how the rest of this story is gonna go. Matteo is the one with the girlfriend, the “obstacle.” Is he going to run hot and cold, go back to Sara after getting with David? 

Matteo looks sad as David goes, obviously. Making it worse is that of course that’s the dude Leonie likes. Matteo takes a drag of the joint before replying that he thinks it’s somebody else. Well, David was someone somebody else liked (ahem), so I guess that does make him somebody else. But clearly David is going to be so much more to Matteo than just “dude Leonie likes.”

Anyway, I love how quiet and down to earth that scene was, how it wasn’t instant smiles and conversational bliss but a little rough, testing each other out. And I think it’s good that Matteo seems to be more proactive around David, because they both seem kinda like chill stoner/emo kids, and two sleepy guys is not going to be that exciting of a dynamic, honestly. Matteo being the instigator gives the story a fresh take, and the contrast between Matteo with David and Matteo with everyone else is really, really important. We can already see that David is the person, the one who makes Matteo slip into a different mode of his being, one that’s happier and more comfortable. The one who makes him wake up.

Social Media/General Comments:

Jonas says he’s better about the Hanna situation than he was before. We’ll see how long that lasts. I hope his S2 attitude leaves a trace this season, like it was such a big deal and had an affect on Matteo feeling adrift from his best friend, so it should play a role in their relationship.

Abdi refuses to get on Instagram, which is convenient for the show’s social media content creators, lol.

As explained in the texts, a pipe broke in the apartment, so Mia, Hans, and Linn had to move out, and Linn found them a new apartment but one with an extra room, so they needed another roommate fast. Mia suggested Matteo as she heard through the grapevine that he wanted to move out. It’s pretty sad because he was looking to leave, so we can assume things are very bad at home. At least it didn’t escalate to him sleeping in a basement.

I’m glad they found a way to move Matteo into the apartment neatly and quickly with the small gap between S2 and S3. I think Matteo living on his own is a pretty big contributor to his feelings of isolation and instability, and assuming Hans plays a similar role as Eskild with his “guru” advice, it helps a lot if they’re living under the same roof. However, it does create a different setup for the two, though, because Hans didn’t “rescue” Matteo like Eskild did with Isak. Living with Hans will give them more opportunities to bond than living apart would, but Hans didn’t nurture and shelter Matteo to the degree that Eskild did for Isak. Hans is like a new acquaintance, and it will take more effort to build them to a point where Matteo feels like he can trust Hans and go to him for advice. Unless it’s solely like “well, he’s the only other gay guy I know” which would be understandable but a bit underwhelming. Hans has a depressing family life, as shown in S2, with relatives who don’t accept his personality, to the point where he adopts a “straighter” persona to interact with them, and it would be amazing to bring in his background to the Pride clip.

LET’S GET SOME MIA/MATTEO CONVERSATIONS ABOUT SEXUALITY GOING, TOO. They made Mia bi but many people think they could’ve done a better job of addressing it, so this is their chance! Don’t just sleep on it by following the OG story structure - make use of those changes.

The only non-confirmed LGBT person in the flat is Linn and you know, they could remedy that this season.

Linn apparently took care of a lot of the move, so that’s progress for her, she got something done for once, lol. 

With the other girls, Hanna and Mia are furtive about why they don’t think it’s serious between Matteo and Sara. I love them for keep their mouths shut about his sexuality.

Seeing Matteo flirt with Sara and make plans to go to the movies with her has me yelling like I’m in the movie theater for a horror film. DON’T GO UPSTAIRS! GET OUT OF THE HOUSE!

There are pictures of Matteo and Amira looking smiley and happy because The Incident happens, heh. Matteo looks like he was having a decent time earlier in the evening and then descended into sadness and fatigue. And, you know, getting drunk and high.

Sara posts a pic with Leonie being like #theonewhounderstandsme and if that isn’t screaming for a Sara/Leonie endgame...

Linn super loves flamingos. 

Kiki and Carlos fight because he was in the bathtub getting high and ignoring her texts.

Mia is absent a lot because she’s hanging with Alex, that’s why she missed the housewarming party. The girls miss her. Come back soon, Mia! Don’t just disappear because Noora went to London!

We got a sappy chat between Mia and Alex to remind us that they’re around, at least. Alex misses Mia even though she’s sitting across from him. I guess they’re in their little couple bubble now.

Matteo checks in with Amira and asks if she’s feeling better or still sick, and Amira’s answers make me suspect she knows exactly what bullshit Matteo pulled on Saturday.

When Matteo invited Sara to study at his place on Thursday, I found myself wishing that maybe Hans could save the day and just be so intrusive and annoying that he drove Sara away without Matteo having to make out with Sara or blow her off rudely or whatever. Alas.

I’m laughing how Markus is “Photoshop Markus” even in the group chat. No one else appears to have a nickname, just him.

Leonie and Sara chat; Leonie has her eye on Gereven and Sara is trying to figure out where she and Matteo stand as a couple. I’m really fond of them and I hope they don’t become Emma and Sonja, honestly. Again, just ... nip those relationships in the bud. Let them go to prom with each other, not the boys. Even if they aren’t together romantically, they seem to be the most important people in each other’s lives.

Matteo zips his lips when Jonas asks if he banged Sara, which conveniently doesn’t mean he has to say no. A very Isak technique.

Mia wasn’t in this episode at all, which is strange when she, you know, lives with Matteo and goes to school with him and we saw all the other girls. In-universe the explanation is that she’s with Alexander, but I wonder if they were filming parts of S2 at the same time, maybe? Reshoots? And that’s why we haven’t seen either Mia or Alexander, because the actors were busy. The other explanation is just that Mia is not here because Noora was not there, and Druck felt the need to follow that story. I’d find that really disappointing. 

This is a really promising start to the season, and I already love the tone. It has a very down-to-earth, painfully vulnerable feel. Matteo’s misery is palpable in basically every scene, except the ones with David, where we get glimpses of his better self. I can sense this kid’s internal struggle all the time. There’s also pining and longing in the simplest moments, from Matteo brushing Jonas’ hair while he’s sleeping, to that one look in the hallway with David causing a spark, to the way they look at each other while smoking, David pointing out the eyelash on Matteo’s cheek. It’s quiet, raw, and real. And that is exactly the atmosphere I want from a S3 remake.

I’m not German so feel free to correct me on translations or cultural notes.

If you got this far, thank you for reading!

[papistark]

Okay. I’ve allowed a night to let everything sink in. I’m ready to talk about Endgame now.

*cinemasins voice* spoilers!! (duh..)

so the wounds are still fresh. v v v v v v v v v fresh. but my thoughts during the entire movie were just OMG IM TRYING TO REMEMBER EVERY SINGLE THING THAT IS HAPPENING SO I CAN REMEMBER IT AS LONG AS POSSIBLE BEFORE i inevitably go see this movie again

This is what the movie reduce me to like 99% of the time btw

now, I’m gonna try and break this up to be as organized as possible into 4 main sections which will be general thoughts, the highs, the lows, and closing thoughts. that may sound organized but I promise it won’t be and as always I’ll have to use bullet holes to even stay relatively "organized"

I'm sure I'm leaving stuff out that I either loved or would wanna discuss but tbh the ENTIRE FILM i was just like GOD I WANNA REMEMBER THIS FOREVER!! Every scene that happened i was like god there's still 3 hours of stuff that's going to happen but I want to remember it all!!!

Overall

this movie was good. and i’m mad it was so good and i found it so enjoyable for how dirty they did me. The pacing was pretty well done for a first viewing, but I'm sure after a couple rewatches I'll get caught up on the occasional misstep in the pacing and general direction the story took, but I really liked it!!

I thought the Thor stuff was kinda distasteful and honestly a joke that ran too long. Like ha ha okay we get it but also? He went through so much fucking trauma can we just lay off him? Damn? I don't wanna linger too much on it bc honestly the more I think about it the more I get upset the russos did him dirty

all the callbacks??? made me so emotional????? eleven years and almost two dozen films guys holy fucking shit it felt like such a good homage to bring stuff back

Yo literally when they went up to busted ass thanos i leaned over to my bf and whispered "are they just gonna kill thanos in the first ten minutes is that allowed" and uh YEP! WOW

Also the opening scene being Clint's family getting dusted... gasps in my theater y'all they went in hard on us

TIME HEIST!!!!!! FUCK marvel knows how to take you on a fun journey!! The concept was so fun!!

I also appreciate them mixing up the plot a bunch to keep us guessing!! Like fuck, when Thanos was finding out through Nebula... future nebula talking to past gamora i was SO SOFT... sisters...

Hulk was... weird. It felt a weird kind of fanservicey for a little bit, and honestly a little out of place? But. Eh. Wasn't the worst part. Certain parts of it were fun! I think I got used to it haha

Everyone looked. So good. After the time jump. Damn. Thank you make up department for everyone's new looks. I live for silver fox tony always.

I loved seeing Loki again i know it was so little content BUT I DONT CARE I'LL ALWAYS LOVE MY FUCKING PRINCE

We didn't get as much Nebula and Tony content as I was hoping but god it was so cute and tender in the beginning. Imagine all that bonding. Nebula finding tony on the floor, knowing he's on the brink of death, and propping him up in the seat :'(((( tony helping fix nebula :(((( the father daughter relationship we deserved and didn't get to see come to fruition.

AMERICA'S ASS. THANK YOU SCOTT LANG.

All the New York flash back was so fucking fun. The elevator scene. Brilliant. I really thought they were gonna recreate but it was such a fun tease. Also cap making fun of his past self for saying "i could do this all day" I SCREAM why do the Russo's get steve so well

Carol taking a direct punch in the face from Thanos without even flinching? We stan a goddess

ALSO SHORT HAIRED CAROL YESSSS I LIVED!!!!! YES!!!! (But also that movie could've used like way more Carol thats just mY OPINION)

Also AGAIN, I DON'T CARE THAT IT WAS FAN SERVICE, STEVE WEILDING MJOLNIR WAS E V E R Y T H I N G. They have TEASED US since that one middle avengers movie we don't talk about that he was worthy and!!! Our!! Son!! Is!! Fucking!!! Worthy. And the scene of thor making him swap w/ him "you get the little one" i screamed bitch

also I was living for how much Steve swore in this film lol literally fuck joss Whedon's characterization we don't know her!

Valkyrie on a Pegasus thank you THANK YOU i was living

That entire final action scene..... holy fucking shit y'all. It was just crazy enough without being too crazy. I loved the callback to the original long continuous shot

THE HEAVENS OPENED UP AND SANG WITH THAT A-FORCE SCENE. YES. ALL THE MARVEL LADIES LINING UP. THEY ARE HERE AND THEY ARE THE STRONGEST OF US ALL. A-FORCE. FUCKING A-FORCE. Thank you Russo's for my LIFE

Carol's little "hi peter parker :)" god i love them. I love peter. My fucking spider son. I missed him so much. I missed Tom Holland's sweet peach little face AH I CRIED WHEN HE SHOWED BACK UP

Also last kind of ~general~ thought i know i don't get time travel at all and it is an instant way to confuse me in any franchise but wouldn't steve doing what he did fuck literally everything up idk we'll get to steve in a bit

Highs

morgan

H.

fucking

stark

I CAN’T BELIEVE I GOT FED WITH SUCH GOOD TONY CONTENT THIS FILM ONLY FOR THEM TO STOMP ON MY HEART LMAOOO

DAD TONY BEING AS LOVING AND DOTING AND SWEET AND TENDER W/ HIS DAUGHTER AS WE ALL HAVE HEADCANONED HIM TO BE FOR YEARS!!!

TONY GETTING HIS JUSTIFICATION IN BEING MAD not just mad but PISSED at Cap for how everything fell out. catharsis. felt good scoob.

speaking of good tony content of course i need to just take a moment to YELL ABOUT STONY thank you russos for the fan service thank you for having tony ogle and comment on steve rogers’ ass it almost makes up for all the pain and suffering

btw do y’all think the H. for Morgan’s middle name stands for Harley because I LIKE TO THINK SO

also am i lowkey annoyed that like half of viewers won’t recognize an adult ty simpkin at tony’s funeral at the end even tho i know i shouldn't be because ot everyone is a die hard BUT half the articles im looking up for reviews and shit of that scene literally all the results are “SO WHO IS THAT KID AT THE END OF ENDGAME” YOU FUCKING FOOLS IT’S TONY’S FIRST BORN SON HARLEY KEENER FROM IRON MAN 3. FUCKS. im getting off topic anyway i was just happy they brought him back because I am an iron man 3 enthusiast and his relationship with tony was SO important and this confirms that at the very least tony kept in contact with him over all these years!!! and he wasn’t just some insignificant blip

Not to be stony on main but steve being the first person to hold Tony again once he was back on earth :)))) wrow.

Also the first thing tony telling him being "I lost the kid" WOW BREAK MY HEART MORE HUH!! WHY NOT!!

The first thing Peter doing when he saw Tony again :'') just rambling about everything that happened and tony just so happy to see him alive and hugging him so tight I'M NOT FINE!! NOTHING WILL EVER BE FINE AGAIN!!!

I appreciated the closure with Howard like?? A lot?? I'm the last person to be a Howard stark apologist, but I think his character and his relationship w/ Tony and how Tony viewed him as a father and as a man was so well crafted throughout the series??? Idk I liked that scene it was good to my baby.

And now a pOSSIBLY CONTROVERSIAL~~ opinion but..... I loved Steve's ending. I really did. I thought he got a beautiful and fitting ending and I was so happy. It meant so much especially to hear his reasonging being that in a way, he did it for Tony. He was inspired by what Tony told him. He saw Tony get his happy ending and for so many films now Steve has been searching for that and he missed an entire life. Tony helped him realize that. It just made me!! So emo!! Like Bucky's face when he knew Steve wasn't gonna be coming back. Steve's last convo w/ Sam. It was just amazing. I can't believe I'm seeing hot takes from people calling Steve selfish or blaming the fact that the Russos have a boner for Steggy or whatever. Who cares!!! Steve got his happy ending and it was well deserved and a wonderful arc!! Lay off him bc you ship him w/ Bucky or tony more damn!!!! (Idk about the timeline y'all dont come for me i really have no idea i think the Russos just said fuck it for that one even when talking about not fucking up the timeline)

Lows

Natasha deserved better. She did. I understand why they took her character arc the way that they did, and honestly, this is the first time I've felt we've seen Natasha have even a modicum of actual character traits since like, Iron man 2 and Avengers 1. She found purpose in keeping the family together and trying to help the people left living, while never stopping or losing contact with anyone else in their endeavors to fix what Thanos broke. As tired as I am of seeing a female character die for ~man pain~ this felt like so much more than that. In the end Nat wanted to sacrifice herself for the greater good, and that's what she did. I'm still fucking upset though, even though they've butchered her character across almost all the films she's been in

Thor being turned into an entire fucking joke. That's it. I got nothin left for the writers at this point.

So..... let's talk about Tony's death, shall we

"You can rest now" broke me. It truly did. I've never loved any fictional character across any medium as much as I have loved Tony Stark. But Pepper's line at the beginning "you'll sleep, but will you rest?" Is so fucking telling. I think I immediately knew for sure in that moment. Because she's right. And that's the worst part.

Peter :)))) finally :)))) calling :))))) tony :)))) by :)) his :)))) first :)) name :))) as he was dying :)))) asking him not to go the same way he told tony he didn't want to go when he was getting dusted GOD. AND WE THOUGHT THAT SCENE IN INFINITY WAR WAS ROUGH. HAD N O T H I N G ON THIS.

No offense but where was Rhodey when Tony was dying lmao ok

That funeral scene.... seeing everyone there drawn together..... god. It was beautiful. It really was.

Of course I'm not happy. I'm extremely fucking upset. I knew tony wielding the gauntlet would be coming, but I thought they would find a way for him to make it out alive. As soon as they were showing that even the hulk couldn't handle it with the gamma radiation, I knew the nail was going to be in the coffin.

All that aside... what I can say, is that if they HAD to kill him off, I think it was a proper send off. We saw so many arcs of Tony's come to a close, and I knew it was just a matter of time. Also that being said, I really don't believe in death being necessary to end a character's arc. Yeah yeah blah blah we get the sad and tragic but TRUE message that at the end of the day death is inevitable and that tony had to sacrifice himself for the greater good. He and Strange both knew it, and as soon as Strange held up that finger I knew that was it for him.

It wouldn't be so hard if they hadn't given us everything they did with tony after the 5 year jump. He healed. He was HAPPY. But pepper was right, and as long as Tony was alive... he would never truly /rest/. And that's the only way I'm able to make peace with this death. Tony has always been a character who was just going going going, never going to stop even if it killed him, all to protect the ones he loved, and protect the whole world and make it a better place. He had a beautiful story that was told so well over these past eleven years, with admitted shortcomings here and there. He had the most cohesive trilogy films, the best character development and arcs, and an incredible portrayal. I'm grateful for it, but that doesn't make it any easier that they decided to go and show us that Tony was able to FINALLY settle down with Pepper and see him find the best version of himself as a husband to her and a father to his little baby girl. A baby girl that now has to grow up without her dad, and pepper has to go on without her husband, the love of her life. It's fucking tragic and honestly, we didn't need that imho lmao

The hardest parts is that like.... idk. I feel like the only reason they killed him is for shock factor, but somehow without the shock? A lot of us felt or were worried that this was coming. I think the russos and co. We're just totally set on the idea that like... tony HAD to die and that was the only way for this arc to come to a close not just WITHIN the universe, but meta, outside of the MCU as well. They did the same thing with Hugh jackman as Logan and that shit HURTED me y'all. Eleven years we had RDJ give us this amazing character and he is the SOLE reason the MCU is where it is today. So you know what, the Russo's and everyone can circle jerk about how much ~poetic justice~ there is in this ending for Tony, but at the end of the day... it just ain't it fam.

Realistically I know after wielding the infinity stones there is no way Tony, a human, could've survived, even with his armor on. I knew that. And as biased as I am towards seeing Tony living, if he had wielded the stones and NOT died? It would've felt cheap. So again, if they had to end his life, I appreciate the way they did it and thought it was the best send off they could've given him. I also would've appreciated some kind of alternate option where oh i dont know carol or someone strong enough could've handled the snap and tony could live the rest of his days with his wife and daughter and found family but..... ig that's just me huh.

:(((( Happy asking Morgan what she wanted and her saying "cheeseburgers" SHE'S JUST LIKE HER DADDY I AM SO!!! UPSET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And last thought is that I fucking cried AGAIN because the biggest applause moment was during the credits when RDJ's name appeared. My theater gave a standing damn ovation. Also the very last sound after it faded to black... Tony hammering away, building the very first Iron Man suit.... that shit hurted.

If any of y'all read this and wanna yell about stuff w/ me I WELCOME YOU INTO MY DMS LMAO PLS MESSAGE ME I NEED MORE PEOPLE TO CRY WITH!!!

[tellywoodtrash]

the great indian dysfunctional family ep 2 lb

(previous)

... the place the show is set in is called “kannuri”? i thought it was in coonoor, the way samar was talking about landslides... afaik there’s no such place as “kannuri”. why choose a fictional place?

ok flashing back to 6 years ago. addu and nandu are playing truth or dare. is there really a need for a bottle to be spun when there’s just the two of you?

addu’s dropping some facts/not-so-subtle hints about bisexuality.

they have chits ready with the dares written? this is faaaaaaaar more organized a truth or dare game than i’ve ever participated in

of course it dares nandu to kiss her opponent. if addu made the chits, i have a feeling ALL of them say that.

aw, it’s quite the sweet tiny peck. though slightly unwilling on nandu’s end.

seems like a bulb has gone off in addu’s head, the way she’s smittenly grinning.

nandu talks about how she can’t wait to fall in love and addu looks like this:

cut to addu in the present, sobbing her heart out. oh baby girl.

sonali and premlata are bonding by looking at old photos. awwwwwwwww yissssssss this is the relationship i’m here forrrrrrrrrrrr.

sonali is so damn cool man. she just oooozes charm and wit.

a baby photo of addu (and premlata mentioning nandu) makes sonali recall last night. 

oh no. she’s going to talk to addu. behen aapne bas kal hi entry maari hai. should you be trespassing this quickly?

she’s easing into the topic quite sensitively though. so maybe she is the right person to have this conversation.

aaaaaaaaand just as she’s breaching the topic, geeta’s here.

slight afra tafri and double meaning talk as sonali encourages addu to “wear whatever she likes” and not fear of people’s judgement, before being pulled off by geeta to some parlour apt.

chachiji, i know you mean well, but this advice is just going to make little addu here crash and burn.

samar’s veryyyyyyy chipper this morning. lol it’s a little strange for me to see sobti SOOOOOO smiley and happy.

aw he’s talking about the kids so fondly. does he have a little baby fever himself?

sonali’s tryyyyyyying to breach the topic about how addu’s “different” and might not just want to settle for an arranged marriage.

ugh samar, that was a sexist thing to say. and just when i was beginning to like you so much.

A+ to sonali for calling him out on it and shutting him down. i don’t know if i want to be her or if i’m just in love with her.

aw mridul is dancing to radha teri chunari. and all the ladies (geeta, premlata, the baai whose name i still don’t know) are lovingggggggg it. as am i. toooo cute for words.

ofc vikram shuts it down. ugh.

great. some realllllllllllll toxic masculinity being thopofied on that poor tiny baby. he looks 5 or 6, at most? ugh, honestly, men are the fucking worst.

is the baai purposely interrupting repeatedly in order to diffuse the argument and protect geeta?

wow, he has all these opinions on which song mridul should dance, but he hasn’t learnt sign language to communicate with him. seriously fuck you vikram.

i’d assumed that geeta was a long-suffering silent type, but i’m very glad she’s not.

this child is truly adorableeeeeee.

wow, even samar known sign language. (even though he said he’s meeting mridul for the first time???)

this just goes to show that vikram’s an exceptionally shit dad.

ugh. too much cute.

aw, what mridul signed to samar was that he really likes sonali’s laugh and was practicing laughing like her. pls excuse me, i’m sobbing.

also yes, sonali deserves this much love and adoration, if not more.

oh samar learnt sign language while in the army. 

now even sonali is attempting to communicate with him with sign language. not very well, but she’s trying!

well-meaning but kinda insensitively framed questions about mridul’s muteness from sonali. i think geeta’s a little hurt.

also she seems a little envious of how loving samar and sonali’s relationship is. sigh.

aaaaaaaand everyone’s off for the night’s festivities. in shaky sharon.

but i notice premlata is missing. just like she was for last night’s event. why?

sonali is me. only priority and incentive to get out of the house is khaana.

what was that slight moment between sonali and geeta at the song (babuji zara dheere chalo)? felt like an inside joke but.....????

even vikram wants to know. but we don’t find out.

ouff again assi vele? ek hi gaana kitni baar???? there are other party jams you know?????

nandu’s dad (pappu) is realllllly smitten with sonali. almost slightly inappropriately so?

i find almost all men inappropriate and suspicious these days, so it could be just me. sonali seems fine with it.

meanwhile addu’s on the hunt for nandu. oh girl, no.

vikram’s sharing army waale stories with some junior. ugh idc about you man. gimme more samar/sonali/addu.

vikram didn’t appreciate his “can you believe men these days get mani/pedis?????” bs interrupted by geeta.

and samar and sonali.

sonali notices geeta’s hand lingering on hot junior’s arm a little toooo long while she’s making introductions. oh boy. sonali maybe you should STOP noticing so much. just for your own sake.

no but geeta really does seem to have some kinda special equation with hunky junior.

vikram why the fuck are you so bitter about samar’s profession? honestly.

samar’s good-naturedly asking him to maybe come visit him sometime at his restaurant, but there’s a real bite to the way he’s saying it.

aaaaaaaand addu’s throwing back drinks. oh honey.

sigh.

ugh some gossipy aunty is asking geeta if she thinks nandu and her fiance have already “done it” coz look at her “glow”. WHY ARE YOU OLDS SO GROSS??????/ JFC.

aaaaand she’s now sharing about how her husband made her “glow” only twice this year. and once was on rakshabandhan. which is creepy as hell. you need to stop talking NOW, aunty.

ugh anyone with seeing eyes can see that vikram cannot get his head out of his ass and look beyond himself, i hardly think he’s making geeta “glow”.

okay so vikram and nandu’s dad just seem to be best friends. so phew, thank god, addu isn’t RELATED to nandu.

two (?) drinks in, addu’s here in nandu’s room and staring at her plaintively as she gets ready. oh baby girl.

nandu’s pretending like nothing’s happened. and asking for help tucking in a mic below her lehenga. oh nandu. why??? you know how she feels about you.

oh great. she’s found a hickey on nandu. ohhhhhhh boy.

aaaaaaaand they’re fighting.

fuck. don’t tell me is beech mein the mic gets turned on and broadcasts to the whole crowd outside.

mridul’s here to dance to radha (in a cuteass little anarkali type outfit) and vikram isn’t happy. but thankfully keeps mum other than a brief disapproving glance at geeta.

ohhhhhhh boy. the dj is fucking with the console and the mic is nowwwwww on. FUCK. DUMBASS DJ.

SKDJFHDSKJFHKDSJFHKDSJFHKDSJFHDKSJ GIRLS PLS NO AAAAAAAAAH I’M DYING OF MICHMICHI

FUCKING DJ CAN YOU FUCKING GO BACK TO PLAYING RADHAAAAAAA WHY IS THIS STILL ON????????

AND THE WHOLE CROWD IS JUST LISTENING INTENTLY INSTEAD OF TURNING IT OFF BY GOD KYA BESHARAM LOG HAIN.

addu’s saying everyone knows about them, including nandu’s dad. is that why vikram arranged nandu’s wedding?

aaaaand nandu just broke it all off calling it “a phase”. sigh. poor addu.

oh boy. nandu’s walking downstairs smiling resplendently. oh girl. kisne kaha tha mic itni jaldi lagaane ko??

lmao samar’s face. (is he flashing back to what sonali was trying to say in the car this morning and joining the dots?)

aaaaaaand both the girls know that everyone knows.