#sansa’s learning and groaning so much beyond ‘ugly men good & cute men bad’

[starrology101]

1) Sandor threw Sansa on a bed, held a knife to her throat and demanded she sing for him.

““Sing, little bird. Sing for your little life.”...Her throat was dry and tight with fear, and every song she had ever known had fled from her mind. Please don’t kill me, she wanted to scream, please don’t. She could feel him twisting the point, pushing it into her throat, and she almost closed her eyes again, but then she remembered.”

He’s a grown man and she’s a child.

Tyrion had Sansa strip naked on their wedding night and he molested her.

““Get in the bed Sansa. We need to do our duty.” She climbed onto the featherbed, conscious of his stare. A scented beeswax candle burned on the bedside table and rose petals had been strewn between the sheets. She had started to pull up a blanket to cover herself when she heard him say, ‘No’ 

The cold made her shiver, but she obeyed. Her eyes closed, and she waited. After a moment she heard the sound of her husband pulling off his boots, and the rustle of clothing as he undressed himself. When he hopped up on the bed and put his hand on her breast, Sansa could not help but shudder. She lay with her eyes closed, every muscle tense, dreading what might come next. Would he touch her again? Kiss her? Should she open her legs for him now? She did not know what was expected of her.”

He’s a grown man and she’s a child.

2) A 16 year old girl with a man in his thirties isn’t better. Most of the functional, semi healthy relationships we see in the series do not have these age gaps. GRRM might have done that for a reason. Some kind of commentary on the abuse of power dynamics between adults and children maybe.

3) “yeah all the pretty guys you thought were great are also horrid people inside'”

So the solution is to pair Sansa with a grown men who is ugly on the inside and the outside? That doesn’t make sense to me.

4 What I read was Sansa blocking out and rewriting a traumatic memory so that it’s easier to deal with, which she’s done for most of the books. I would judge the situation based on how she felt in the situation. And if you think this:

““Who?” she said, too frightened to defy him.”

““I can’t,” she said. “Let me go, you’re scaring me.””

“He was too strong to fight. She closed her eyes, wanting it to be over, but nothing happened.”

is attraction than idk what to tell you.

I hope that whoever Sansa ends up with, it’s a man she freely chooses to marry and sing for.

I also saw you mention jonsa in the tags, which is weird since I never mentioned them and don’t ship them.

@starrology101 Sansa’s going to end up with two grown men who assaulted and harassed her because they’re ugly?

I'm just

not counting this was in reply to a post I wrote in 2021 and like... it's been two years whatever but not counting that if you read it you missed like the entire point and I'm not gonna get into it again but like

nor tyrion nor sandor have ever assaulted or harassed her, like sandor lit saved her from a mob and didn't beat her when joffrey ordered it, tyrion actually tried to stop that and after he was also forced to marry her by his father (when he absolutely did not want to either but hey that wedding was apparently coercitive just on one side??) he made a point of not having sex with her when technically it was within his rights so like........ dunno where you got that notion but that shit didn't happen in either books nor show so idk what to tell you

blackwater being assault is like..................... if you see it like that you can but he absolutely didn't do anything to her, he was drunk, he left and she thinks he kissed her when that never happened so like again everyone is free to be as uncomfortable with blackwater as they wish and I absolutely will not be the person saying you have to find it romantic or suck it up or whatever but it was meant for it to be what makes sandor want to get better and she romanticized the shit out of it after make out of that what you will

'two grown men' tyrion in the books is 24 and sandor is like 27 and no way sansa gets with either of them before wow which means she'll be at least 16 which makes it an entirely reasonable age gap within westeros customs and norms like lit no one thinks sansa should have been with either of them in the actual canon so you do you

'because they're ugly' my pal idk how to explain it anymore when it's obvious in the text but grrm has a thing for beauty and beast narratives, the entire point of that trope is that one of the two isn't stereotypically good looking and certainly that ain't sansa out of whoever else it is and sansa in the beginning thinks marrying a pretty guy is the bee's knees and then the narrative goes like 'yeah all the pretty guys you thought were great are also horrid people inside' and in this kind of narrative the point is realizing that what you thought was a+ in the beginning isn't what you actually want/need so yeah two **ugly** guys that everyone treats like shit because they're not standard attractive and have trauma and so on will be more likely endgame options for sansa's bc her entire shtick is falling in love with someone who's **ugly** outside and not so much inside which neither sandor or tyrion are so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

idk if you read the books but all of sansa's asos chapters + affc ones are her basically thirsting after sandor and convincing herself he kissed her first so she can like tell herself a narrative where *she* picked the guy who was her first kiss and so on when everyone else is basically exploiting her and fucking littelfinger took that like............ that's basic romance novel 101 idk what to tell you take it up with grrm not me

tldr: sandor or tyrion (not both) are the only two characters that are viable for sansa as love interests looking objectively at the narrative, you don't like that go take it up with grrm but I can 100% assure you that either of them is way more likely than the guy she thinks is her brother and is the only one of her siblings she wasn't close to while she was the only one of his siblings she wasn't close to ¯\_(ツ)_/¯