#sainttmother

[cataschism]

✦ @sainttmother asked: "Don't disappoint me."

Aegon is the SMALLEST HE’S EVER BEEN in front of his mother. He is that little boy in front of the hearth, when Aemond had his eye removed &. his mother was not chosen by his father in favor of Rhaenyra, &. he is the little boy crowned king &. he is her son, her first son. And she is his mother, THE EMERALD OF THE ENTIRE WORLD.

❛ I don’t intend to disappoint you, Mother, ❜ Aegon says &. he means it. To disappoint his mother is to disappoint all of the world &. there is nothing so wrenching as to see his mother’s lip a-curl &. know he is the cause. He loves her more than life. There is no forest he would not bonfire &. no rat he would not hang if it gave her peace of mind.

❛ Have I… ❜ A-wring of his hands. &. yet he watches her steady as a hawk. A conqueror’s eye - contact: she is never out of his sight. ❛ I would never, Mother. I swear it to you. Just tell me if I have made an err. I will right it. ❜ 

ALICENT.             /             the beauty &. brain of King’s Landing, &. oh his mother, his dearest mother. Aegon is so small in her presence.

[absolventiia]

❛ I can't protect you! ❜ to aurane

HIS WHOLE LIFE, HE'D ONLY WANTED TO PLEASE HER. it is some sort of sick twist in fate that of all the ways he and aegon were alike as twins, this was the most astounding : the absolute, heart - shattering love they had for alicent. while aegon was being prepared to be king, and aemond was obsessed with those fire - breathing beasts -- still whole, still with all his vision, aurane had searched for his mother's hand. when aegon had taken to the skies on sunfyre, when aemond had finally gotten vhagar to his side, and the younger twin was still left with his dark, muddy hair and no mount of his own, AURANE HAD WANTED COMFORT.

and still, alicent threw herself at his twin, pushing him this way and that -- forming and molding IMPOSSIBLY their future king. aurane learned to stop looking for his mother's favor ; instead, he'd become silent and sullen and distant from anyone and everyone, except, of course, his siblings. aurane spent countless hours in the training yard with criston cole, with aemond. he'd won, and won, and then lost, when aemond began fighting in earnest. even as his elder brother, aurane could not beat him. just another inadequacy he'd faced that made aurane stubborn, made him turn to more unhealthy coping mechanisms to FILL SUCH IMPOSSIBLE VOIDS. the only thing that started to curb aurane's hatred was SYNDOR -- that black and silver dragon that had approached the prince on one rainy morn at fifteen. soon, he'd turned to drink, to women, to letting syndor fly and hunt as he pleased.

and then there were assassins in the middle of the night. and then, aegon had gone to rook's rest. and aurane had followed and fought on the ground, landing syndor in the heat of the battle. ABOVE, DRAGONS DANCED. and aurane had seen aegon and sunfyre fall like a meteor to earth. 

AFTERWARDS, WHEN THE KEEP WAS SILENT, aurane was gripping at the balcony railing when his mother had come in to talk, to possibly offer words of comfort. once, that was all aurane had ever wanted -- and now, it leaves a sour taste in his mouth, a turn in his stomach.

" protect me ? " he repeats, almost wanting to laugh. " NOW THAT AEGON LAY DYING, you wish to protect me ? to protect aemond, our new PRINCE REGENT ? " he'd let aemond take that title. the council had suggested the king's twin, but aurane had denied, and walked out of the meeting altogether. he did not search for power, and yet, that cannot change the line of succession. aurane would be next in line, should aegon stop breathing." . . . i suppose i should be the one to tell you, now, since no one else seems to have the heart to do so. you cannot protect me. you never could. you cannot protect any of us, no matter your. . . BEST INTENTIONS. " 

[vezosdaria]

@sainttmother asked: "There is no justice in this world, only the justice we make."

Aegon   studied   his   mother’s   face,   searching   for   the   familiar   iron-willed   resolve   in   her   eyes   that   had   always   seemed   unbreakable,   even   in   the   darkest   moments.   But   this   time,   her   words   cut   through   the   air   like   a   blade,   and   he   could   not   help   the   bitterness   that   twisted   his   own   voice   in   response.

Aegon   tilted   his   head   slightly,   a   humorless   laugh   escaping   his   lips.   “Was   it   justice   then,   Mother,”   he   asked,   his   voice   sharp   and   unkind,   “that   drove   you   to   put   this   crown   upon   my   head?”   The   question   lingered   between   them,   an   accusation   wrapped   in   pain.

He   remembered   the   suffocating   weight   of   the   Conqueror’s   crown,   the   way   it   had   been   forced   onto   his   head   with   ceremony   and   fanfare.   Justice.   What   had   it   ever   meant   to   him   but   duty   and   chains?   He   is   King   in   name   only,   for   no   one   in   his   council   believes   he   can   make   decision   of   his   own   volition.   His   first   real   freedom   had   been   daring   to   seek   justice   for   his   son   and   send   his   grandfather   to   Oldtown.   It   had   been   exilirating.

But   there   is   nothing   like   his   mother's   words   and   presence   to   suffocate   whatever   bravery   he   might   muster.   For   a   moment,   neither   of   them   spoke,   the   echo   of   Aegon’s   bitterness   hanging   in   the   air.   He   wished   he   could   find   comfort   in   the   crown,   in   the   title   she   had   fought   so   fiercely   for   him   to   claim.   "I   do   hope   it   was   all   worth   it   in   the   end,   Mother."

[storiesofthenight]

@sainttmother liked for a starter.

Aemond felt as if he were in a haze. He had somehow made it back home, but he could hardly recall how he'd done it. He had slid of Vhagar's back almost on autopilot and made his way through the halls of the Red Keep unseeing until he had quite literally bumped into someone.

Startled, he had backed off, needing a moment to realise that it was his mother standing before him. Soaked to the bone, Aemond stared at her, his eye betraying just how shaken he felt as he stood here, dripping all over the floor. "H-" He swallowed, unable to finish his sentence, much less even form a word.

[menmyth]

  He was never an official, no that was his fathers specialty before the madness stole him from the world. Surrounded by the fair haired Targaryens seemed surreal, he’d heard rumors and whispers of their strength, their endurance in battle and over all their terrifying presence. Many had whispered what it felt like to sit in a room full of dragons, and as Arthur rested alongside several others of Aegon’s court he could only feel partially let down.  He was  young, far younger than himself and while he bore an air about him that strived for accomplishment and ambition – it felt absent. The council had been fairly brief a short agreement in their alliance telling where Arthur’s knights would lay their swords. For a brief moment he wonders if it had been better if they had remained neutral, withdrawn from such a war. Family affairs were always the trickiest to navigate and he understood better than most, the familiar flash of his fathers dying gaze is briefly danced in his vision as he halts in his steps. Whispers stop in their tracks, a harsh shush given before Arthur’s dark eyes land on the king's mother. Alicent; formerly a hightower. A polite smile is given to the redhead before him, voice low he gives a bow of his head. “ Queen dowager, I didn’t mean to interrupt - “ A single brow arches as he watches Lary’s strong emerge from the alcove, the polite expression on his face sharpening. “ I apologize for the intrusion, I’ve become a bit turned around. “ 

@sainttmother liked for a thing!

[zalarys]

❛ not all of us are going to make it out alive ❜ @sainttmother

𝖌𝖗𝖎𝖒   words,   though   daenerys   knows   there   was   truth   in   them.   the   split   within   house   targaryen   was   deep,   a   fracture   that   would   not   heal   on   its   own.   it   pained   her   to   see   her   family   torn   apart,   to   see   them   turn   on   one   another.   she   feared   for   the   future   of   house   targaryen,   for   the   future   of   the   realm.   no   good   could   come   of   dragons   going   to   war.   the   common   folk   would   no   doubt   suffer   greatly   as   war   broke   out.

❝   i   fear   there   is   little   comfort   i   may   offer   you,   for   your   words   are   true.   ❞   she   murmured,   looking   to   the   former   queen   for   a   long   moment   before   her   attention   is   drawn   back   out   the   window   she   stood   in   front   of.   daenerys   was   no   fool,   she   knew   that   her   three   dragons   were   heavily   coveted   by   both   sides.   still,   she   did   not   wish   to   let   her   dragons   loose   upon   the   land.

[calirphs]

anyone knows where i can reach wiltflora/ sainttmother ? they deactivated their alicent blog and the other blog doesn't exist. they submitted a commission.