#saezuru fanfiction

[artemisrisen]

Chapters: 1/2 Fandom: 囀る鳥は羽ばたかない | Saezuru Tori wa Habatakanai Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Doumeki Chikara/Yashiro Characters: Doumeki Chikara, Yashiro (Saezuru Tori wa Habatakanai) Summary:

what happens next, after chapter 50.

[corfisers]

heavily projecting here, but i think nanahara/yashiro is so comforting for me because i like the idea of accepting that yeah, maybe romantic relationships aren't really for you, but that's okay. you can still be with someone who loves and cares about you, you can still find peace and comfort in a company of a close friend. romantic love isn't the end goal, it's not inherently better or more significant than other types of love, and your inability to have a "proper" relationship doesn't make you lesser. just don't be completely alone.

[lustfulcat]

Giving - A Saezuru Christmas Ficlet

After the last chapter I figured we could all use something soft and warm so here’s a little Christmas gift for everyone  ♥ I hope you all have a safe, healthy, and lovely holiday!

***********

It had been five months since Doumeki ripped Yashiro away from Kido.

Five months since Yashiro – surprisingly afraid and shaken by Doumeki’s anger - broke down and confessed how he felt.

Five months since the storm across Doumeki’s features broke and, with a smile, he said I knew you were in there.

Five months since the love that had been slowly growing between them was finally exposed to the light, unfurling like a flower leaning toward the sun.

And something inside Yashiro had changed. Soothed. The turmoil in his mind was no longer a hurricane but a soft rainfall that grew lighter by the day. Was this growth? Healing? Maybe. All he knew was that waking up beside Doumeki, lying naked against his warm body on a cold winter morning, gave him a strange sense of calm.

“Good morning.” Doumeki kissed the top of Yashiro’s head, brushing a strand of hair behind his ear. “And Merry Christmas”

“Is it Christmas?” Yashiro feigned ignorance but he was waiting, biding his time. As usual, Doumeki saw right through him and, with a quirk of his lips, sat up, causing Yashiro to do the same. Turning, he reached into the bedside table and Yashiro once again found himself admiring the colorful tiger tattoo that ran from the back of Doumeki’s neck down to his waist. He should hate it, for it represented all the things Yashiro had tried to steer Doumeki away from; however, he couldn’t help thinking that it suited Doumeki. He was a tiger: strong, striking, willing to take down anything in his path, a true hunter.

He had certainly hunted Yashiro for years, capturing his heart. And now Yashiro saw the other side of the tiger, the soft, catlike, purring part of Doumeki, especially during mornings like these.

Pulling a small black box with a red bow atop it from the drawer, Doumeki placed it gently into Yashiro’s hands. Yashiro blinked, not knowing what to do or say. A small part of him said not to accept it, to throw it away, but he wasn’t listening to that voice anymore; instead, he listened to the pure one that came from inside, from what he guessed was his heart. It was much easier to hear these days.

“Wait.” It took him a few seconds to scramble off the bed and search for his suit jacket. Doumeki had torn it off him last night as soon as they’d walked in the door and he followed the trail of discarded clothing until he found it on the floor near the entryway. Padding back to the bedroom, Yashiro gave Doumeki a longer sleeker box, something he’d sent Nanahara to fifteen different stores for, with very specific instructions.

“For me?” Doumeki blinked at the box then up at Yashiro, who climbed onto the bed again, leaning against the headboard.

“No for Tsunakwa, I shopped for your boss, OF COURSE it’s for you,” Yashiro was tempted to throw a pack of cigarettes at him. Doumeki quirked his lips again, staring down at the package with something akin to reverence. “Open yours first.” Yashiro was still battling with his inner voice, which wouldn’t tell him how to react to a Christmas gift - it was the first he’d ever gotten - so he was going to study Doumeki’s reaction and learn.

Carefully, Doumeki lifted the lid and his eyes widened as he caressed the pair of leather gloves inside. They were sleek, pitch black, with a small golden tiger embossed on the back.

“Kashira…” Doumeki’s soft smile turned wide and genuine, reflecting in his eyes, and Yashiro forgot that he was supposed to study Doumeki’s reaction, instead he got caught up in just how beautiful the man was. How striking, how gorgeous, and how he was all Yashiro’s. “Thank you very much. I will treasure them.”

Absently, Yashiro wanted Doumeki to try them on and caress his body but he still had to open his own gift first. Especially when Doumeki looked at him so expectantly.

Taking in a deep breath, Yashiro considered the small velvet box in his hand, knowing that it contained something precious, something that would have him cross a line, and once opened, he couldn’t go back.

But he didn’t want to go back. No matter how loudly his past screamed, Doumeki was literally the man of his dreams and he wasn’t going to send him away, not again.

Slowly, Yashiro cracked open the box to find a gold ring with a small hummingbird engraved on the front shining up at him. With shaking fingers, he lifted it, noticing a single word written on the inside.

Kashira

“The hummingbird is a symbol of joy, healing,” Doumeki gently took the ring from Yashiro, grasping his hand and sliding it on his fourth finger. “And love.”

“Are you asking me to marry you?” Yashiro flicked his hand around, looking at the ring, wondering why he liked it so much and just when he’d become this kind of person. Maybe he’d been this kind of person all along, it had just been smothered under so many layers of his old rotten life that he’d never had a chance to breathe. A chance to spread his wings and fly.

“No, not yet,” Doumeki blinked again, stoic as ever, but Yashiro could see the small hints of emotion in his face: in the flush of his cheeks, the heat in his gaze, and the tender way he held Yashiro’s hand. “I’m…I’m telling you that I love you.”

“Okay…” Yashiro found himself at a loss for words. Not a single snarky phrase came to mind. The only thing he could think of was to say what was in his heart. “I guess I love you too.”

Doumeki immediately seized his lips and the kiss was deep, sultry, and had Yashiro falling back onto the bed ready to celebrate Christmas the right way.

Flashing his ring at Doumeki he threw his arms over his head, arching his back in an enticing invitation and smiled. “Now put on those gloves and touch me.”

[swallowerofdharma]

Yesterday I reblogged some translated interviews that Yoneda gave, they aren’t recent, but I think they are still interesting. My intention was to write about something I have on my mind, but these days I think my brains have been slow cooking from the constant heat and are about done.

In this interview she gave in 2013, when volume 1 was published, she was asked about her characters and she had various things to say about Yashiro, and about Doumeki she said: “Doumeki is a character originating from Yashiro. It's like he started functioning because Yashiro existed”.

My point on entry to this manga was first and foremost Yashiro, too, he existed so vividly for me, it was easy to immerse myself into the story, easy to read through his expressions, the various degrees of lies and truths that came from his mouth, his sense of humor, his way of looking at the world. And I think it matters that when I started reading the story I was the same age Yashiro was. Now Yashiro has been 40 for quite few years I believe, how lucky. My birthday is next week, can’t delay it.

Doumeki was an afterthought for me, too. But regardless of what Yoneda said back at the start, I can see now how well she chose in terms of story and conflict and why she made some decisions that I wouldn’t have expected, thinking of a character that would have worked for Yashiro: like making him so much younger, for example, or not very expressive and not very experienced or smart in terms of dealing with people and situations. But the point is maybe that not many men would have been that good in creating a conflict that deep within Yashiro for change to happen.

Doumeki’s first name reveals to me the narrative function he has: force. When we strip down Yashiro of all his outer layers - and just as many layers of inner conflict- at his core he is like a trapped animal. I have tried to show how I think of what moves him in other analyses, and fear is the most deeply rooted, what stayed longer within him with a type of resignation, resilience and survival instincts that gave him the ability to withstand all. A bird in a cage who has been trapped long enough that even with the gate open he won’t fly away, his wings are atrophied. So what force would be strong or effective enough to make him move? What wind can lift him up?

I actually like the fact that Doumeki is that flawed as well. How easy it would be to make a perfect fictional character to be a love interest: someone dependable, stable, dedicated. But very boring and completely unrealistic or devoid of an inner self. A character like that wouldn’t have worked with someone with a strong personality like Yashiro to build a good story. On the outside Doumeki seems very manly and stoic, I have seen an expression used in fandom and fanfiction: “competency kink”. But the amazing thing is that that type of stoic person is very fictional. Who knows what hides behind a “proper” person who is regarded as competent and capable. Yashiro is the type of character that is constantly attuned to the fictional aspects of the world that surround us in his hypervigilance, like every good trapped animal is constantly aware of danger. Yashiro perceives many aspects of life as theater, role-playing, he has a very good sense of what is the reality behind any representation, or putting up appearances; he sees the incongruities, the contradictions and the fictional aspects all too well. Which is why I love him so much. This particular aspect is also something that gay men and queer people know on a fundamental level. And one element that makes Saezuru a story about queer characters to me more then a projection of the sexual fantasies of straight women: it is still “consumable” that way as a good yaoi - if one chooses to - or because one isn’t intimately attuned to the layered workings of putting on masks and the talents for misdirection that people who are covering up their pain or entire parts of themselves are inherently good at producing and revealing.

But let’s get back to Doumeki and his first name 力, Chikara, as omen for what he is in the story, what he is in relation to the “unmovable object” (or stagnant) that Yashiro can be. In my understanding, chikara means strength, power/potency and authority associated with masculinity. It reminded me of the Italian name Andrea, that is more commonly assigned to boys, because it comes from the Ancient Greek word and concept of ἀνδρεία, or courage, fortitude, manliness and valor in war.

So, at the beginning of the story, that force has been restrained and caged as well. Doumeki was in prison, he is impotent, he lacks purpose when he gets out. He doesn’t know where to direct and channel that force that came out on the surface in full once:

But after that, he never regained a balance, never had the opportunity to reconcile his emotions with the new reality that was presented to him when he saw what his father was doing. And he went on a route of passivity, all those emotions muted. He saw Yashiro and he felt something again, and he clung to that feeling, of coming alive, more alive that he ever was, letting it grow, until Yashiro was shot. After that we see Doumeki more desperate, less able to restrained himself, letting loose his aggression at various points, beating up people with too much strength and we can see Yashiro noticing. And his sexual impotency is also gone.

It would be interesting to analyze properly these chapters: I believe that after each of these episodes of violence there is a scene in which Doumeki puts his mouth on Yashiro and progressively becomes more insistent and unrestrained. These are parallels worth considering.

A young man who has a complicated emotional past, no real control over his emotions and a misguided belief that Yashiro is the person he needs to be close to and protect, because he is the only one capable, because that is what he can do, he sweared to, and he is singleminded determined to keep Yashiro in sight. Nothing about it speaks of balance, of maturity, of stoicism, Doumeki is progressively less in control, doesn’t realize that they need to prioritize the investigation on the origin of the threat and find a solution, he seems to forget about it in his anxiety to have and keep Yashiro for himself, to tie him to himself under the guise of being his arms and legs, his protection, his lover. He is dogged, insistent, he lets everything pour out at once, being it rage or sexual desire. And you can also call it love, because love often makes people lose balance quite easily. And this force that is a mix of things starts pushing Yashiro too, ways out of balance, ways out of his established emotional boundaries. Does it work as a love story? I believe that in some aspects it actually does, but in a much more crude way than expected. It surely cut deep. Yet, it isn’t all dark, it’s difficult, unresolved, but not really doomed. Because there is something in the other that they still desire.

[beigepillow]

So I’ve been thinking about the ask regarding analysis about Doumeki and truthfully I left out a part of my opinion. I think there is a censorship in the fandom about Yashiro in particular and if you don’t follow the general opinion about him, you become kind of an outcast in the fandom. It has gotten better recently because my opinions have been shown to have some kind of validity to them with what is happening in saezuru but I have had a rough time of it. Looking at the events in saezuru through Doumeki’s pov and trying to understand him as a character doesn’t always put Yashiro in a great light and you have to tread lightly or else you can attract the ire or judgement of people. I have found myself censoring my posts and using private posts to help deal with certain aspects I am wary of. In my experience, I have dealt with accusations on my character, sometimes losing followers or in general being blocked. I don’t know how many times I have been blocked by people (which I typically find out by seeing reblogs and then realizing I can’t access the original) and I am generally pretty understanding towards Yashiro. I don’t think I am entitled to anything but it makes me feel very unwelcome and makes me second guess my posts. Of course that is a me issue but this is the first time I am so active in a fandom I can’t help but be insecure. Before this, I avoided both twitter and tumblr and mainly read fanfiction as a way to connect to others. I think sometimes people apply real life social issues or project onto Yashiro and take it too far. It has gotten to the point where I really try not to go onto other blogs and interact or tag saezuru because I am afraid of some kind of repercussion on my opinions. I am so grateful for people who seem to value my opinions and the people who send me asks but yeah, being a Doumeki girl in this fandom has been an incredibly weird/tumultuous experience and I feel that there are rules as to what is allowed and what is not and making analysis on Doumeki can sometimes cross that line into not allowed. This is just my opinion and mostly I feel like sometimes I just want to delete this blog because there is no point to it if I constantly have to censor myself.

[cielelyse]

FAVOURITE SOMETHING SOMETHING Because I Am a Sucker for Pointless Compartmentalization to Destress, i.e. I’m Procrastinating Please Ignore Me

Favourite TV shows:

Six Feet Under | Nghĩa Hải Hào Tình

2. Favourite songs:

Moonshadow - Cat Stevens | Thằng Cuội - Lê Thương | Closing Time - Leonard Cohen | Pursuit of Hapiness - Kid Cudi

3. Favourite movies:

Dead Poets Society | The Tale of Princess Kaguya | Inception

4. Favourite mangas:

Fruits Basket - Takaya Natsuki | Haikyuu - Furudate Haruichi | Saezuru Tori wa Habatakanai - Yoneda Kou | Glass Mask - Miuchi Suzue | Thần Đồng Đất Việt - Lê Linh (Vietnamese) | The Horizon - Jeong Ji-Hoon (manhwa)

6. Favourite books in the English language (fiction):

The Old Man and the Sea - Ernest Hemingway | No Great Mischief - Alistair MacLeod | A Tale of Two Cities - Charles Dickens

7. Favourite books (non-fiction):

First They Killed My Father - Luong Ung | Prisoners of Geography series - Tim Marshall | Nobel Prize for Women in Science - Sharon Bertsch McGrayne

8. Favourite ships:

Getou Suguru x Gojo Satoru (JJK) | Phil Coulson x Clint Barton (Marvel)

9. Favourite anime:

Natsume Yuujinchou | Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood

10. Favourite courses:

Introduction to Classical Mechanics | Electromagnetism | Radiation Physics

11. Favourite books originally in a non-English language (fiction):

The Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas | All Quiet on the Western Front - Erich Maria Remarque | Tian Guan Ci Fu - Mo Xiang Tong Xiu

12. Favourite poems:

Nhớ Rừng - Thế Lữ | That the Science of Cartography is Limited - Eavan Boland | Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening - Robert Frost | The Waste Land - T. S. Eliot

JUST WANT TO FIRST SAY THAT THE CLINT/COULSON FANART IS BY rascalparadyne.tumblr.com, WHO IS SO TALENTED AND AMAZING BUT WHOSE ACCOUNT I THINK HAS BEEN DEACTIVATED :( BUT IT'S THE CLOSEST TO WHAT I IMAGINE THEY LOOK LIKE WHILE READING FICS (+ Clint being blonde)

I also realized that I never reread books, so the selected favourite books are all because they've made the biggest impact on me at the time of reading (i.e. forced me into massive philosophical contemplation against my will) (and I read them all as a teenager, because sadly uni drained all my brain energy to read more than fanfiction) (this is really a defensive note that my teenage self googled "Best Books of All Time" and bulled through them without taking into account the fact that the author pool was not as representative as I would've liked) (sorry) (though the fact remains that these books did mean a lot to me). BUT I HAVE BEEN READING MORE LATELY, WHICH IS GOOD! I was reading The Seven Husbands of Evelyn Hugo and A Thousand Splendid Suns, and am currently really enjoying the Discworld series by Terry Pratchett — absurd satirical humour always goes a long way :')

[doumekierect]

NEW SAEZURU FIC

yashiro meets doumeki’s mother x

https://archiveofourown.org/works/35189332

[fantasy-zelda-blog]

Snow tiger - A Saezuru fic

Read it on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17402057/chapters/40960262

Title: Snow tiger

Pairings: Kageyama/Kuga; Yashiro/Doumeki Chikara

Characters: Yashiro; Doumeki; Kageyama; Kuga; Misumi; Amou; Tsunakawa; Tsunakawa’s underlings (OCs: Yamamoto and Miyazawa); Hirata.

Setting: what is next?; Christmas

Word count: 1000+

Chapters: 1/?

Rating: Mature

Potential Trigger Warnings: blood; wounds; abuse; violence

Summary: “He crouched down to assess the situation, placing his bag beside him. At closer inspection, he heard the other boss repeating in a whisper a name, “Doumeki.”

“Misumi-san sent me. You’re safe now,” he said. Yashiro tried to turn and look at him but winced. “Careful there, stay still.”

Notes: Hello @mecakeski​ , this is your gift for @saezurusecretsanta Secret Santa​ 2018. I am deeply sorry that I am so late. I hope you can forgive me. This is a multichapter fic, already wholly outlined. Kageyama and your prompt “love spell” will be in the next chapter. I’ll try to update the fic as soon as possible, because you deserve a finished gift. In the meantime, I wish you a happy new year!

[yoonbum0]

Well fuck

[artemisrisen]

I wrote a brief continuation of what I imagine will happen after chapter 47

I need to make it leave my Word doc so here you go. spoilers, of course. 

“You’re coming with me.”

Doumeki’s tone was flat and brooked no argument, even when an argument was sure to emerge from his insolence. Yashiro stared at him, trying to find his footing and assess the other’s mood: was he furious? Annoyed? Disappointed? – but it was like examining a cold, marble statue posed in a garden. Face frozen always in the same impenetrable expression.

He set his mouth. “Doume��”

But Doumeki evidently was done. He turned on heel and walked back into the darkness from where he came; the authoritative set of his shoulders said clearly, You better follow me. Now.

Yashiro, perhaps some time ago, might have felt the soft frisson of desire course through his body at such a demand. Now he just felt deeply tired. He wanted to be alone, to sink into the dark oblivion of sleep for that brief while.

But he fell in step behind all the same, keeping his stride as casual as possible - as if he just happened to be going the same way.

They arrived at a sleek, black motorcycle parked just outside the complex. A helmet hung from the side, which Doumeki unhooked and extended to Yashiro.

“You drive a bike?” Yashiro said, surprised enough to ask. He ignored the helmet and the flip in his stomach.

“Yes.”

“Since when?”

“Two years ago.” The helmet gleamed its sharp red under the lamplight.

“Why?”

“It made travel easier at times.”

“There’s only one helmet.”

“I’ll be fine.”

Yashiro stood still. “Where are we going?”

Doumeki didn’t respond, didn’t move, didn’t even blink. He looked right into Yashiro’s eyes like it took nothing from him to do so.  

How easy for him.

“It will mess up my hair,” Yashiro said, finally acknowledging the proffered item before him.

“Please put it on for safety,” Doumeki said, only it wasn’t a request. His body seemed deceptively calm, but Yashiro knew, from their prior encounter, that he was no longer above getting physical.  

Yashiro felt a sudden, violent impulse to grab the helmet and pulverize Doumeki’s head with it, just to see if it would crack open and show anything human inside. He snatched it and briefly considered hurling it down the street, just to see what Doumeki would do.

Well. Doumeki may just drag him down the street to get it.

So he put it on. It felt like entering a subdued reality; his vision was darkened by the visor and his hearing was muffled by the cushioning. He felt softly detached from everything and it felt peaceful.

Until Doumeki kicked the stand and fluidly straddled the bike like the romantic lead in a movie. He turned the key and it came to life, revving with a low growl.

“Get on,” he said.

Yashiro wanted ­­­­ to snap at his insolence, even as his heartrate inexplicably picked up. It wasn’t a big bike at all.

What is this strange reaction? He thought to himself. As if he didn’t have his fingers inside you just a few days ago.

He eventually conceded, though he tried to not press too closely, holding onto Doumeki’s sides with a loose grip.

But that wasn’t enough. “Tighten your arms around my waist,” Doumeki said. Without waiting, he reached back and adjusted the slackened arms himself, and soon Yashiro was pressed right against his broad back. If his visor was open, he imagined he could smell the sweat and the faint, musky cologne emanating from Doumeki’s neck.

He did not think about that further. Instead he thought: Perhaps he’s taking me to the countryside to kill me and hide my body. It didn’t scare Yashiro to imagine that. In fact, like in the brief respite he put on the helmet, he felt a calmness settle over him.

He swallowed down all the sensations his body was screaming to him as they whipped through traffic, with Doumeki expertly maneuvering around like he was a professional racer.

The ride was relatively short, not anywhere near the roads to the country, and ended outside of another apartment complex. Yashiro didn’t have to do much deducing to realize they were close to the Sakura family grounds.

Doumeki’s place, then.

Doumeki dismounted from the bike and, shockingly, offered a palm out for help.

Yashiro got down on his own, turning out the other way. Doumeki let his hand fall to his side.

They made their way up the stairs in silence. Were they going to have sex? Was Doumeki going to interrogate him about Inami? Why was he even going along like this?

They got to the third floor of the building and walked halfway down the hall, coming to stop in front of a non-descript doorway. Yashiro felt the tension seep into his stomach as the key turned.

The apartment was open and clean, a direct contrast to Inami’s compacted, beer-can-riddled pigsty. It wasn’t bare bones either, the way Doumeki’s old place had been; there were bottles of expensive alcohol on the shelves and a plant sitting by the windowsill. It looked like a place where someone lived, instead of just existed.

“So?” Yashiro leaned against one of the exterior walls. “What are we discussing?”

In lieu of answering him directly, Doumeki went to one of the drawers in the kitchen island and opened it. He pulled out a new pack of Gudang Garam cigarettes, still tightly bound in its plastic, and placed it on the counter.

“This is for today,” he said. “Kamiya-san can get you more once you run out.”

“Excuse me?” Yashiro said.

“Please give me a list of your preferred foods and I can have them stocked in the fridge.”

“What are you even talking about?”

Doumeki’s expression seemed to shift incrementally under the light. “The situation with the Sakura family is too serious for any further missteps. Until it’s resolved, you’ll be staying here.”

Yashiro could only stare at him.  Doumeki had already turned away and went into another room. “I’ll have one of the men bring your clothes and essentials over. Please hand over your apartment key.”

Yashiro touched his breast pocket where the key rested, but he didn’t withdraw it. “Is this a joke?”

Doumeki didn’t answer that. Of course not. Yashiro followed him into the other room, feet carrying him on their own will. They all ended up in the bedroom, where Doumeki was rifling through a closet.

“Please write down anything specific you need,” Doumeki continued, “and I will make sure it’s retrieved by this next evening.” He pulled a robe out and laid it on the bed. “For now, I have a second set of robes and underwear for you to use for sleep.” He pulled out more clothing, laying it on the bed. The single bed.

Yashiro tried to laugh, but his chest was painfully tight, and it felt impossible to do so. “That’s—” and then he turned and bolted for the front door.

Doumeki must have been anticipating this kind of reaction, and their bodies collided against the frame before Yashiro could even reach the doorknob. He was pressed against the lacquered wood, not painfully but unyieldingly. Doumeki’s strength, much like his will, was immovable.

“Get off of me, Doumeki!” Yashiro snapped, a bit wildly. His control always slipped through his fingers like water when Doumeki appeared. It was unbearable.

Instead of complying, Doumeki adjusted his position and pushed his body further into Yashiro’s.

“I want you to be comfortable,” Doumeki breathed into the shell of his ear, “and I will give you everything you need. But I will tie you to the bed if I have to.”

“So you’re kidnapping me?” Yashiro spit. “You really think—”

Doumeki’s hand slipped so suddenly into his pocket, Yashiro stopped talking. His phone was pulled out and presumably placed into Doumeki’s jacket.

“I know you can’t help it, but I won’t compromise on this,” Doumeki said. “Please accept the conditions for now.”

Yashiro wanted to laugh now, truly laugh, but the prospect of his future was so overwhelming that he could only breathe.

“Nanahara is going to be looking for me,” Yashiro said, almost as an afterthought. “By morning.”

“I will call him. And I will advise him that you will be safe, and to not interfere.”

“He won’t accept that.”

“That is not my concern.”

Yashiro knew he had lost for now.

“How long?”

“As long as it takes.”

They were still pressed together.

“All right,” Yashiro said. “All right, Doumeki.”

[flexistentialcrisis]

Chapters: 2/? Fandom: 囀る鳥は羽ばたかない | Saezuru Tori wa Habatakanai Rating: Explicit Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Doumeki Chikara/Yashiro Characters: Doumeki Chikara, Yashiro (Saezuru Tori wa Habatakanai) Additional Tags: Foreplay, Doggy Style, Dirty Talk, Bathroom Sex, Kitchen Sex, Food Play, Spoiler Alert: They basically have sex all day lol Summary:

Yashiro and Doumeki have the day off work, whatever will they do all day?! ;)

Chapter 2 is now up! Hope you all enjoy! <3

[lustfulcat]

Saezuru Fanfic - A Sweet Gift

This takes place during the timeskip

 Yashiro looked out the window of his office, lips turning down in a slight frown. That black car with the tinted windows was out there again, parked at the end of the street under a broken lamp, cloaked in shadow. It had been lurking on and off for weeks now, even following the casino to its new location, which Yashiro had decided on after Misumi had stopped by one too many times.

It couldn’t be Doushinkai muscle, Misumi was far too obvious for that. Other groups? They usually showed up to gamble not to hover around like a rodent sniffing the air. And it definitely wasn’t the police - they were on Yashiro’s payroll and vice versa.

“AGAIN?” Nanahara appeared beside him, cracking his knuckles. “You want me to go down there and send them off, Shachou?” He’d grown a lot in the last few years but the gangster inside had never died. He was probably itching for a fight; his days of tangling with Matsubara were far behind him. Lately, the most action Nanahara saw was tossing overly-drunk patrons onto the street but Yashiro wasn’t about to let him loose on whoever was down there.

“No,” Yashiro lit a cigarette. “I’ll take care of it.”

“But-” Nanahara started to protest but Yashiro gave him a look that conveyed the beating he would get if he continued. He wisely shut up but still glowered like a little kid who was told he could only have sweets after he ate his vegetables.

Yashiro ignored it, wanting to sate his curiosity. He’d tried to approach the car a few times but the minute he walked outside it always sped off. However, this time whoever it was wouldn’t see him coming.

He wound through the building, flitting through the noisy crowd like a ghost, only coming to life once the cold air hit him as he slipped out the back door. Shivering, he looked up at the sky. Christmas Day was right around the corner, bringing the frigid weather with it. Small soft flakes began to descend, and Yashiro grinned, humming an old sentimental song as he snuck down the tight corridor between his casino and the soaplands next door. This time he wasn’t lying down naked in the snow but if his stalker was tall, buff, and played his cards right then it might happen again.

Reaching the front of the building, Yashiro peered cautiously around the corner, back tight against the wall. The snow was picking up and it was difficult to see through the flakes that stuck to his eyelashes but he could tell that the passenger door was open and, squinting, he saw broad shoulders leaning over the sidewalk.

Yashiro flicked his cigarette away and shoved his hands in his pockets, striding out into the street. There wasn’t enough time for whoever it was to get away.

Or so he thought. Before he got halfway across, those broad shoulders stiffened then moved faster than their bulk suggested, vanishing into the car. It sped away in seconds leaving Yashiro standing in the middle of the road, blinking through the snow as he watched the car turn a corner and disappear, leaving faint tracks in the white that was piling up on the street.

What the hell was going on? Who was this? For all his shrewdness, Yashiro was coming up empty. Something about the set of those shoulders was vaguely familiar but the thought was planted firmly at the back of his brain and wouldn’t move any further.

Frowning again, he started to turn back to the casino when something caught his eye. Tilting his head, he crossed the street fully and stared down at the sidewalk, right where Broad Shoulders had been leaning out of the car.

Lying there at his feet was a pack of Gudang Garam menthols and a can of Lemon Squash, along with a red rose. Squatting down, Yashiro poked at the cigarettes in disbelief. That was his brand. Broad Shoulders knew him all too well. Yashiro had fucked hundreds of men but he couldn’t recall any who would remember what he smoked. And why was the soda there? That something at the back of his brain twitched, making him feel warm despite the freezing temperature. Warm…and a little melancholy.

Tentatively, he reached out and picked up the cigarettes, pocketing them. Then he took the can and the rose, twirling it under his nose and letting the scent wash over him. Perhaps it was the song he’d been humming but he felt sentimental again, and hoped that the next time Broad Shoulders wouldn’t run away.

Because maybe this was the man from his dreams.

[batsinwhitechapel]

A little drabble

Set after chapter 27

A little fantasy I've been obsessing about for the past month or so, so much that I had to write it down.

Be warned, as I rarely write and English is not my native language, some sentences and word choices are bound to be a little awkward (or downright incorrect). And the rules for the use of punctuation signs differ a lot between English and French, so I probably got it wrong somewhere too. And I can't get my software's spell check to work in English, so there are probably typos in there as well.

Also, the story itself is a bit corny and OOC. Actually, I got carried away by my own fic and didn't know how to end it.

For all these reasons, I'm far from 100% satisfied with it. I keep amending it a little, in the hope that I can make it better.

I've been lurking around the Saezuru fandom for a year, and never participated in anything. I took and never gave, not even an anon post or an intake on anyone's theory. So now, I'm contributing with something, however small or lacking (or corny or OOC). I hope you enjoy reading it!

Doumeki burst into the room.

Kageyama and Kuga sprang apart. Clearly, Kuga had been trying to seduce a relunctant Kageyama into having sex at the clinic, as he often did – sometimes successfully. At the unexpected intrusion, Kuga shouted an angry 'Who the -?' and seemed ready to throw a few punches. But when the identity of the intruder was revealed, his expression actually turned pleased.

'Doumeki!'

In a flash, he crossed the room to where Doumeki was frowning, looking lost and supremely oblivious to the two people in the room. His gaze swept the room twice before finally settling on them.

'Is Boss here?' he asked with even more intensity than usual.

'What? Uh, no, haven't seen him since yesterday.' answered Kuga. 'Why, is playing hide and seek a new fantasy of his?'

The taller man ignored this as if he had not heard (indeed, he had not) and started to retreat, mumbling what sounded like a vague apology. Kuga, now very intrigued, grabed Doumeki's arm, pulled him back into the room and threw him into a nearby chair, alarmed at the half-hearted way Doumeki was trying to fend him off. The more he watched him, the more he realised how dejected and anxious Doumeki was. He looked like an overgrown child who had just learned that his parents had abandoned him.

'What the hell's wrong with you?'

Focusing on him again, Doumeki answered with none of his usual calmness 'I have to find him. He left while I slept after... after, and I don't know where he is now! He could be hurt or- or worse, and it would be all my fault! Again! And I couldn't bear it!' and he lowered his head in his hands.

Kuga and Kageyama stared at him, then raised their brows at each other. Well, Kuga did.

That was more words than they had ever heard the usually unflappable man say, and more fervour than they would have thought he could show, at least in public. Something was definitely very wrong there.

Kuga spoke again. 'God, you seem completely off. Tell us what happened. You're his bodyguard, why would he leave you behind?'

Doumeki straightened up took a great breath, but said nothing.

'Is he angry with you? Did you do something you shouldn't have?'

Doumeki tensed.

'You did?' Kuga said, only half believing his luck. He regained his footing now that he had a vague idea what was going on. 'Sooo, what did you do?'

Silence.

'Did you kiss him?'

Silence. Kageyama frowned.

'Did you... touch him?'

Silence. Kageyama frowned at Kuga. Doumeki seemed to be made of stone.

'Did you... did you fuck him?' said kuga, in disbelief.

'Kuga...' Kageyama sounded stern.

Doumeki hung his head.

After a second of bewilderment, Kuga's laughter broke out, but was swiftly cut off by Doumeki's soft 'That's not right.'

'Huh? What's not right?' asked Kuga, his mirth receding a little at Doumeki's earnest expression.

'I didn't fuck him. We... I made love to him.' and with this, Doumeki raised his head and stared defiantly at the two other men.

Kuga's complexion became a couple of shades redder. 'Doumeki, that's... uhm, very corny.'

Doumeki lowered his gaze.

Kuga started to pace.

'But still, that doesn't really explain... wait.' Kuga stopped and turned back to Doumeki, asking mishievously: 'Are you that bad in bed?'

'Kuga.' Kageyama said, louder and more assertively this time.

'What? The guy took off while Doumeki here was sleeping it off, by the sound of it. One has to wonder. So, Doumeki, did you manage to make him come, yes or no?'

'Yes'. As if it was a matter of course. Despite himself, Kuga shivered.

'How many times?'

'Kuga!' Kageyama sounded slightly alarmed.

'Four'

Kuga's mouth hang open. Kageyama stared at Doumeki. The former was the first to recover.

'In a row? Holy...'

'But one was unintentional'.

'One was... how the hell is that even possible? My God Doumeki, I know the guy's a dirty perv, but even so, you probably overdid it.'

'Don't say that.'

'What?'

'That the boss is a pervert. He just... has a strong sex drive.'

'And likes to take it up the ass so much he can come four times in a row' Kuga countered with a cheeky smile.

'No.'

'No what?' the smile faultered.

'He did not come all four times like that.' Doumeki finished his sentence reluctantly. He realised belatedly that the conversation had taken a rather intimate turn.

'Oh, I see.' Kuga's face went another shade redder. 'And how did he come, intentionally or unintentionally?'

'KUGA!' Kageyama was definitely alarmed now. He was trying to find a way to avoid hearing this conversation without storming out of the room or stuffing his fingers in his ears, and he was failing. He did not believe he could stop his boyfriend's questions, now that Kuga's eyes were so bright with interest.

'I don't think I should tell you.' Doumeki already regretted having told them so much. He found he did not like other people prying into his private moment of bliss with Boss.

'Why not? I'm sure your precious boss would tell us himself if he was here.'

'Tell you what?' sounded a voice in the background, making them all start guiltily. Yashiro's voice. Its owner was standing just outside the room in one of these poses that made him look so effortlessly beautiful and sexy.

Before the two others had a chance to move a muscle, Doumeki had jumped out of his chair.

'Boss!' He crossed the distance that separated him from Yashiro in a single long stride, and fell to his knees in front of him. Then he prostrated himself. 'Boss, I'm so happy to see you! Please don't do this ever again, don't leave me behind. If you want me to, I will swear I'll never touch you again. But please, I beg you, don't send me away, let me stay by your side!'

'My, my, how chatty you've become in my absence' Yashiro sounded playful, but a troubled undercurrent was nonetheless perceptible in his tone. He addressed the two other men in the room. 'So, what was I supposed to tell you if I was here?'

Yashiro's presence and attitude gave Kuga a strong urge to unsettle him. Still a little red in the face, he said: 'How he made you come, including the unintented orgasm, since from what he said he did not manage it all four times with his dick.'

For a second everything was still. Yashiro's eyes widened a little. Everyone else was staring at Yashiro: Kageyama with apprehension, Kuga with defiance, and Doumeki apologetically.

Yashiro shot the latter an unreadable look, and the former a scary smile.

'That's true, I came only twice with his dick. The other two times were with his tongue and with his fingers, respectively. Oh, and the “unintentional”, or' his fingers fluttered to Doumeki's cheek 'should I say “unplanned” orgasm was the first, with his tongue in my ass. Was that everything, or was there something else about our fuck that you wanted to know?' He inclined his head in a gesture that would have been inviting at another time. Instead, Yashiro's tone and expression made it intimidating.

Doumeki looked as if he had been slapped.

Kuga recovered from his embarrassement at the thorough way Yashiro had answered his question when he noticed Doumeki's reaction. He glared accusingly at Yashiro and cried out:

'How dare you say it like that?'

The violence of Kuga's reaction took Yashiro aback. He was used to Kuga's hostility towards him, but he realised this time was different.

'What do you mean?'

Kuga pointed to Doumeki.

'To him, it was not a fuck. He said... he said – Damn, Doumeki, how could you say that with a straight face?' He tried and failed to prevent his face from reddening again. Turning back toward Yashiro, after a deep breath, he managed 'He said you... no, he said he made love to you'.

He was not the type to blush, he wasn't! But those two damn guys really were too much. He could feel his face burning.

Yashiro went very still. A mix of uncharacteristic emotions showed on his face. He looked uncertain and deeply moved, but also very frightened. Kageyama's jaw dropped a fraction.

Yashiro stared into Doumeki's eyes, very slowly raised his hand again, caressed Doumeki's cheek, and whispered 'you said that?' before concluding more loudly, trying for his usual carefree manner 'How corny.'

'That's what I said', interjected Kuga. But Kageyama had already grabbed his arm, giving off a strong “you shut up, now” vibe.

Doumeki was kneeling and staring adoringly up at Yashiro as if the man was his only anchor in a storm.

'Yes, because I do' he said softly.

'You do... what?' said Yashiro breathlessly.

Little pink spots appeared on Doumeki's cheeks. “So, he can get embarrassed” thought Kageyama.

Doumeki straightened a little and whispered:

'Love you'

A beat.

Then, very slowly, almost hesitantly, Yashiro bent to kiss him.

Kageyama wished he was anywhere but there. He was looking for another way out, as the kissing couple was blocking the door. But of course, as he very well knew, there was none.

He cleared his throat. It had no effect whatsoever on the deepening kiss he was made to witness. He suspected Yashiro and Doumeki had totally forgotten his and Kuga's presence.

'Oy! This is a private clinic here, go do this somewhere else!'

Doumeki stood, and for an instant, Kageyama thought he was going to act on his words. But then one of Doumeki's hands shot to the side of Yashiro's neck and the other to the back of Yashiro's head, and Doumeki kissed his partner even more fiercely than before.

Things were escaladating fast.

Kageyama was trying to find a way to halt the kiss and throw the two intruders out without actually getting too close to them, in case Doumeki lashed out at being interrupted. The two of them looked positively entranced, as if nothing and no-one else existed.

He turned to Kuga, and at his mesmerized expression, shook him a little.

Doumeki ended Kageyama's predicament as he lifted Yashiro from the ground and carried him towards the hospital bed on which Kageyama and Kuga had been when he interrupted them, clearing the doorway.

'Let's go' murmured Kageyama in Kuga's ear.

'Huh? You bastard, so we can't do it here today, but they can?' He pouted, craning his neck to watch the other two as they were starting to undress each other, totally oblivious. 'That's so unfair'

Kageyama did not answer. They were finally out of the room and into the corridor. He closed the door and locked the room from the outside. 'Thank God, we're out. They really have no decency'

'No, they really don't'. Kuga smiled.

[beigepillow]

I have been very into Draco/Harry fanfiction lately. (Please don’t judge I need other things to fill the saezuru hole). One story I read is one about soulmates except one has the other’s name and one is completely blank. If we were to use that AU for saezuru: who do you think would have the name and who would be blank? I think Doumeki would have Yashiro’s name and Yashiro would be blank.

[decipheringthelife-blog]

The fck did I just read! Bring back Doumeki mf!

Have a nice day

A Saezuru short fic. Because Im crazy in love with these two but lack creativity. Please excuse my bad grammar and my audacity to post. xD

✨

The sun grew slowly on the horizon and birds starting to sing in the wide sky lines.

Yashiro, snuggled up on his bed naked, covered only from waist below. Burying his face with soft pillows, he slide his right hand across the bed. Searching for that warm body lying next to him, but there was only the cold sheets. He opened his eyes feeling disappointed.

"You could have stayed for a bit. Then I would have....." he thought bitterly.

From the night's activity before, his body was sweetly aching. Getting up from bed was a bit difficult task to do. Slowly rising and putting his feet on the floor.

Scanning the room as if to convince himself they indeed returned to his place.

He noticed now the room was a mess. Some clutter here and there. He chuckled a bit, remembering how he would hit himself on the drawer, as his arms were occupied, embracing this tall figure.

Kissing sounds filling the room. Breathe of small pants escaping their mouths. Feeling his blood rushing all over his body. Over whelming excitement, as if he hadn't felt like this before.

But he soon snap out of the memory as he glance at the clock. Remembering he had to see Nanahara before 12-noon. They were arrange to meet a man named Oto, to discuss revenues.

From daze of his nights' passion to business-minded man instantly. Not that it's any surprise. Yashiro is a flexible man like this.

"...first I need a shower" he thought, as he sigh, rubbing the back of his neck.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

(Doumeki's pov)

Woken up by the touch of cold hand semi holding his wrist.

In silence he stared at the beautiful face, inches away from his. Such a serene look. The thought crossed his mind.

The sun hasn't risen yet, but the man's face radiate, as if the lights from the window was kissing their face, as his fine fringe sliding down on his forehead.

Doumeki's lips stretched a bit. A rare smile painted on his face, one that could make ones heart ache. Oh, if only Yashiro could see this smile. A smile that was directed at him while sleeping.

Doumeki had an urge to kiss the beautiful man, but was in fear of waking him up.

His eyes wandered, tracing Yashiro's jaw line. From his ears, to his neck and down to his shoulder, where a scar is barely visible on the other side, covered by the bed sheets. But he is sure it's there. The scar. An ugly reminder of his incompetence. How he loathed himself to this day he failed to be at his side to catch the 3 bullets from hitting Yashiro.

He rolled on his back, inhaled deeply and got up.

"It's been 4 years since then..." he thought sullenly. "And yet I still...."

He glanced back at the sleeping Yashiro. His eyes was so gentle. Captivated by the sight of his beloved at an arms reach from him.

(Been 4 years but regret still lingers.)

To pull himself away from these thoughts he got up from bed. He was being careful of his movements not to disturbed Yashiro. A thought came to him suddenly. Back then how did he not noticed Yashiro getting up and dressed? He was injured at that time, right? For some reason it's a grand mystery to Doumeki of how quiet Yashiro can move.

Well, for now, he decides to take a jog, while the world was still quiet.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

After Yashiro's refreshing bath he covered himself with robes. And a towel above his head. His hair was still dripping.

His new apartment or more like his bed room was just above his casino. Originally an open space for office.

For convenience's sake, he converted it for his sleeping quarters. This way he didn't have to deal with going to and fro his casino and apartment.

As he was drying his hair with a towel, he was reading his txt msgs sent by Nanahara. Oto wants to negotiate somethings. Yashiro was thinking how troublesome it is to do bussiness but a necessary one to keep the money rolling and to stay afloat.

As he was about to reply, he heard some tinkering at the kitchen. He thought for sure Doumeki alread left.

He took small steps towards the stairs. The stairs wasn't that long, so he reached the bottom in few seconds.

In a split second he felt joy to see a man standing at the small table with blue apron on. Preparing a meal. Pouring coffee in a small cup.

He look so adorable with an apron on. And although he was only making breakfast his rolled up sleeves, and black leathered gloves added to his charming looks. Not to mention the visible scratched on his forearm.

"Is that from last night?" Yashiro thought gazing at the mark.

"Good morning." A soft greeting was address to Yashiro.

"......"

"I made you some breakfast before I leave. You said you didn't had dinner last night."

"Why bother? I can just have someone order me something. And it's rare for you to wake up this early." There was a bit of sulking in Yashiro's voice.

"Yes. But I wanted to make sure you eat properly." Doumeki explained, as he pulled a chair. "Please have a seat."

"......"

Yashiro was reluctant but took up the offer anyway. In truth he really was famished but just held on a bit of pride not to show it.

As he sat down, he noticed there was only a set of meal for one person. He looked up at Doumeki, "you're not joining?"

"No. I'm sorry. I'm needed at the office right away."

"Hmm is that so."

"Yes." Doumeki answered as he untie his apron and hang it on the hanger. He rolled down his sleeves, put on his coat and neatly button them up.

As Yashiro was about to drink his coffee. Doumeki closed in on him and kissed his head and with a soothing deep voice said, "I'm taking my leave. Please have a nice day." stepped back from Yashiro. Walked towards the door, bowed in respect, and gently closed the door in front of him.

Yashiro was just stunned. A small gesture of genuine gratitude and respect is something he's never had before. Even from Doumeki it still feels new. But for now it was okay.

"Have a nice day..." he quietly muttered.

°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°°

As Doumeki was leaving the building he remembered the image of Yashiro looking up to him. Asking him to join him on the table.

Doumeki felt a pang in his chest having to say No. To lie. because of course Doumeki wanted to sat across him. It would be bliss just having a view of Yashiro in front of him. He blushed when he remembered Yashiro's scent. The smell of his shampoo suited him. He wished nothing more than to be beside him...

But he refrain himself. He didn't want to suffocate Yashiro with his presence.

As he walked down the street, taking corners, A strong grip held him from behind. As he was about to turn to see the attacker, a stinging feeling hit him from the front.

Another man stood in front of him, piercing his abdomen with a slender knife.

In quick succession stabbed Doumeki 8 times. The two men then back off and ran away as quick as possible in fear of any witnesses.

Doumeki was in shocked. Naturally. He slowly reached for his phone for help, but his energy was fading fast. He dropped his phone. His consciousness blackened.

He dropped on the cold ground with no one around him. Blood was seeping out of his body making a red puddle.

Doumeki stared blankly at the pavement, gasping. and the only thing that he was thinking was the image of Yashiro sleeping beside him.

~ End.

[whydoiloveyouanyway-blog]

I've been doing a pretty good job of avoiding Saezuru spoilers but

I'm getting the feeling that 28 is STILL not the chapter in which everyone goes out for karaoke and Yashiro is up first, starting with "Night and Day" (there's not a flaccid dick in the room by the time he hits "and this torment won't be through/ till you let me spend my life making love to you/ night and day," but honestly, probably not for some time before that, because the whole time he's been stroking and just-shy-of-licking the mic Tina Turner-style), and when Doumeki is up he asks Yashiro to join him for "Je T'aime ... Moi Non Plus" (Doumeki takes Jane Birkin and Yashiro takes Serge Gainsbourg and everyone feels like that's just right even though that means Yashiro’s the one singing "I come and I go between your thighs, but I hold myself back" and Doumeki's the one whispering "No, this time come") and the party dissolves by spontaneous agreement that everyone else is going to stagger off to find someplace to jerk off and leave the karaoke space to Y&D to do what they do whenever they have a small enclosed space to themselves

..... I mean, but that chapter has to be coming, right? or maybe it already happened because that's what follows the party boat excursion? or ..... maybe I'll have to wait for someone (*cough* @artemisrisen) to write a better version of it