#saeran choi week

[natasha-in-space]

Alright, I'm gonna babble a bit on my thoughts and observations with the magnificent CG's we got for the Choi boys' birthday this year 'round! And, boy, what beautiful CG's they are. I acknowledge that some had problems with them, but I honestly couldn't be happier. Both of them made me feel giddy for two days in a row! The artist did a fantastic job, and it's a treat to still get some new content from Cheritz. Now, let's start with Saeyoung!

God, do I adore the soft, domestic feel of this one. It's peaceful, intimate, and tender in a way that sharing a special moment with the one you love is. I am a sucker for simple domestic moments of romance, so even I admittedly swooned at this one!

Since it's dark outside, we have two options. It's either a small private celebration between you two after he spent the day with his brother and RFA, or you're congratulating him as soon as the clock strikes midnight. I find both options equally sweet and fitting! Either way, you are sharing a small private moment with him, with just you two for a small while. I believe he would be deeply grateful for that.

It looks like he's gotten himself a place out in the city! Isn't that a lovely thing to see? I do think he'll keep his bunker, whether it's for potential emergencies or just for safekeeping, but I always loved the idea of Saeyoung creating a new home for himself, however that may look like. It is logical for his new apartment to have large windows that are high enough to see the night sky. It's very much Saeyoung. And it's very much Saeran, too! During the day, Saeran enjoys the warm sunlight and vast clouds, while Saeyoung enjoys looking at the stars and teaching you about space at night.

He made sure his new home had windows because his bunker didn't have any. A reminder of his new freedom to live out a peaceful life with his family without needing to look over his shoulder at every step.

We have some gifts laid out in the background! The interpretation of whether this is from you, Saeran, or RFA is up to you. I like the latter option. It does make you think what kind of gifts would everyone prepare for him! Lots of funny and/or sweet ideas to think about.

There are also lots of frames hung up on the wall and laid out on the shelves. It made me giggle. Because of course, Saeyoung would litter his home with photos of you once he gets the freedom to do so. It's even a bit excessive, but how can you complain? This man was terrified of having evidence of his own existence out in the world for years. Not to mention that he was not allowed to have any reminders of the people he loved, as he was afraid of their safety.

Of course, he will make sure to surround himself with reminders of a brighter future now that he can. Selfies with you, photos of Saeran reading a book or cooking, and outings with the RFA. All such precious moments he doesn't want to take for granted.

As many have already pointed out, the cake is from Saeran! Ain't that sweet? The first time I noticed it, I glowed with joy because I adore the idea of Saeran making something by hand for his older brother. Saeyoung was always the giver and protector in their relationship, back when they were kids... Now, they can start over with more balance. And Saeran can also take care of his brother. I can't help but think of him spending hours in the kitchen, making sure everything is perfect, and that's just... so damn heartwarming. I love these two and their love for each other. They deserve to be together without fear.

@marshmallowprotection went over the details of the cake very thoroughly in her post, so I won't go over it personally, but, oh my God, of course Saeran would put in small meaningful details into his cake. It's so much like him. From the flowers to cherries and whatever that is written in that envelope. I am certain that Saeyoung will likely shed tears upon reading it. Heck, Saeran can just scribble out a big 'Happy birthday Hyung :)' on there, and it'll make him cry just as much.

Saeyoung is unfamiliar with being taken care of or appreciated. It will take him some time to stop getting emotional over the smallest things when it comes to his family.

Speaking about the CG as a whole, I love how relaxed and tender he looks. It's nothing fancy, just a black shirt and jeans. That's what makes it so soft and domestic for me. It's just you and Saeyoung. In your home. Being together and cherishing each other. And that's better than any grand display.

We get to see more of Saeyoung's arms!!! I always love when they splice up some things that are very much true to canon. While it doesn't make any sense at all to make Yoosung or Saeran muscular jocks, it's very much in line with Saeyoung. It's easy for those arms to lift you up and hold you tight! I also actually like that he's visibly broad in here. I know it's not everyone's interpretation, but it makes him actually look, y'know, older. Even though he'll be 21 forever, it's pleasant to imagine him in his late twenties or early thirties. I know most of my guy friends got very broad in the shoulders once they hit their middle twenties lmao

I also very like MC's dress. It's super cute and comfortable. And that watch on Saeyoung's wrist? Another nice touch. I don't know why, but I always pictured him into watches lol. Mostly because he seems to have a soft spot for anything technical. It's easy to see him being fascinated by the inner workings of different watch models. He's such a nerd (affectionate)

Look at that giddy smile! He's such a cutie. Love to see him be all happy like that. Also his hair is once again super red. I'm telling you, it changes color depending on his mood. It's my biggest theory in whole MM storyline/j

AND NOW ONTO THE MAN HIMSELF, THE ONE I'VE BEEN BENDING MY KNEE FOR EVER SINCE I SAW HIM, THE ONE I IMPLODED MY DM'S OVER-

Ahem

Yes. We got an actual official Unknown/MC CG. The fandom exploded. I know I saw it, I know you saw it, we all saw it. Unknown took the fandom by storm, and he knows it. Look at that smirk. I even saw quite a few old MM artists thinking of coming back just because of him lmao

That's the power this man holds.

Alright, my incessant ramblings aside, this CG looks absolutely ethereal. And it's pretty much intentional. Goes in line with Unknown's aesthetic, too. I know we all love to lovingly call him the king of edge that he is, but from what we see of him? He'll probably put you in something similar. He is your guardian angel, after all. The one who will lead you to a true paradise you couldn't even hope to reach by yourself. He is your loving shepherd, and you are his precious lamb.

The placement of Unknown in such a graceful environment makes sense.

So, Unknown's cake has strawberries AND blueberries on it. No wonder many people instantly remembered the birthday CG from two years ago! It's a nice and interesting comeback. Once again, redirecting you to @marshmallowprotection analysis post for the in-depth on it, because she lays it out beautifully! I'll just say that it's intriguing to note that besides strawberries, blueberries appear to be another confirmed favorite of Saeran's. I know I love my blueberries.

Here's to hoping that this is a fake cake, because if I see food drowning like that, I would riot, no matter how beautiful and enticing Unknown may look 😔 You're eating that cake, mister! You are not wasting it for a pretty aesthetic!! It also begs the question who made the cake in the first place, and Kait puts out a very interesting thought that this is, in fact, a photoshoot. It's also comforting to think that MC was behind it. Just because I'm a sucker for the idea of Unknown getting spoiled for once in his lifetime. He also seemed to be rather yearning in his birthday chats that you can purchase, so it's a sweet thought for me.

MC is absolutely gorgeous here. I have zero complaints. Unknown is one lucky man, and he knows it. Her skin is perfectly complimented by that shade of pink, and she looks like a nymph or something. I also love how flowy the dress is. You can just tell how soft that fabric is to the touch, and I am on my knees both for this MC and the artist for all their hard work. Also!!! MC has an actual eye visible for once! Always a nice and rare surprise.

The dress is pretty revealing, too, and I couldn't stop giggling once I actually noticed that. What can I say? Unknown knows his tastes, and I sure respect him for that. As I said in another post, her lap is definitely not the only thing he lays his head on, and I am, frankly, jealous of him.

All that to say.... guys. MC is just a stand-in. She doesn't look like 90% of the player base. Heck, I look nothing like this MC! Please don't be discouraged just by how she appears in certain CG's! There are plenty of guys, queer folks and women who look nothing like her, who love and adore Saeran as a character. And you know what? All of you would be loved and appreciated by Saeran. Whatever weight, whatever gender, whatever skin color you are. Your own unique appearance will make you just as ethereal next to him. Because it's you.

Saeran has the same love for you as you have for him. Unknown included!

Now onto the man himself..... God.... how gorgeous he is...... I know I felt like I was falling in love with him all over again when I saw him, pfft-

Who is Unknown without his belts and chokers? Once again, Unknown knows what he likes, and I respect the hell out of it. You go king!

Need I say that they gave him freaking EARRINGS???? I know I wouldn't be freaking out about that as much, if it wasn't a fan thing for years. And now he gets the earrings we all knew he deserves in canon. Life could be a dream.

He also has a cross. Which is a rather... interesting choice. Once again, @marshmallowprotection goes over it in detail in her post. Another fun personal interpretation I had (bc I love giving a darker vibe to things) is that perhaps this image is taken after Saeyoung got captured by Mint Eye. Unknown takes and wears his brother's cross as a mockery of his brother's faith and as a declaration of his triumph. I must say, though, that's, like.... 99% not what is intended here, and just my personal fun musings.

I also find it both hot and hilarious that Unknown has his shirt open like that. He saw his brother's CG and went: 'oh hell no, I can do better'. He's so extra, and I adore him. I also don't think he's muscular here???? He's not depicted as broad or buff. I think people just misinterpret the art style a bit. He doesn't really have any prominent muscle here, and it looks significantly different to Saeyoung's CG. I think the artist just either didn't have much time to flesh it out (an issue Kait goes in detail over), or they had trouble with depicting what they wanted to depict. Or I'm just talking out of my ass here, and they really did make him jacked, but my eyes will continue to willfully choose to not see that 😔

All that to say, I definitely went feral over this guy showing so much skin, and the desire to BITE is strong with this one.

He'll be on my mind first the rest of the year. What an absolute treat.

It's so much like Unknown to be all snazzy and cordial with you. I love how they showcased his mannerisms here. It's irrelevant whether you interpret it as cunning or genuinely affectionate here. That smirk is very much Unknown, and we all know it. I wanna smooch his cheeks so bad. Kait also went over the flower analysis in her post, so I highly advice you to check it out!!

In summary, I couldn't be happier with what we got this year. This is everything I ever wanted and more. Will be definitely writing individual pieces for these, because how can I not?

[schmellows]

" Promise of happiness. "

[password-door-lock]

Unknown has a complicated relationship with sleep. 

He's always tired, but he never wants to admit that he needs to sleep. If you try to explain to him that everybody has to sleep at some point, he’ll only get annoyed with you. Who do you think you are to tell him what he needs? The way he sees it, he’s basically a machine anyway, so shouldn’t he at least get the benefits associated with a mechanical existence? But instead, every few days, his body forces him to sleep until his nightmares wake him up. 

He tries to stave it off as long as he can with caffeine, sugar, and cold showers. Sometimes, he’ll ask you to wake him up if he falls asleep in front of his computer— he’s never pleased about it when you refuse, but he also never retaliates. He doesn’t have the energy, and besides— at least he knows that you won’t hurt him or take advantage of his vulnerable state even when he tells you to.

Eventually, though, he has to sleep. He doesn’t like the thought of leaving you alone in the intelligence room when he’s unconscious elsewhere— what if some believer comes in and you say something misguided that makes you wind up in the basement? What if the Savior comes by and decides to question you about Unknown’s inactivity? There are simply too many variables to account for. The easiest solution, of course, is to sleep when you sleep, although it goes without saying that he'll be waking up before you. In Unknown's opinion, you spend far too long just laying there and nowhere near enough time helping him with his revenge.

You try to baby him even on his good nights. You bring him the best, most filling dinners you can throw together with the ingredients in the kitchen; these are usually accompanied by hot beverages to counteract the biting cold of the intelligence room. You’re about the only person (aside from the Savior, of course) from whom he would accept a mysterious drink, but Unknown has to admit that he enjoys the sweet vanilla chamomile that you always serve him. Though his rational mind knows that he can’t afford to take long breaks from his work, his body is soothed by the tea. 

If he’s exhausted enough, Unknown might agree to lay down with his head in your lap and let you play with his hair as he falls asleep. It’s easy for him to spin this position as a power move— obviously, you’re giving him this attention because like him, right? You wouldn't do anything like this for any of those bastards in the RFA. You’re trying to show him affection, to thank him for saving you— Unknown can allow that. Besides, it feels nice, and isn't he allowed to enjoy simple pleasures like this in between finishing his work? It's basically the same thing as eating ice cream or sending cryptic texts in hacked RFA chatrooms.

He likes falling asleep to the sound of your voice. You can even lull him back to sleep after he’s woken up from a nightmare, if you play your cards right. Tell him how good he is while you pet his hair, but don’t you dare breathe a word to him about it when he wakes up in the morning (or, more likely, in the middle of the night). After the fact, he feels a lot less powerful and a lot more pathetic, especially if there was a nightmare involved. The thought of whimpering and whining at you when he wasn’t awake enough to stop himself makes Unknown feel a little sick. Secretly, he's grateful for both your care and your discretion, though you'd never get him to admit it aloud.

He doesn’t want to want any kind of comfort, but the more time he spends with you, the less frequently he refuses when you offer. You might even be able to get him to let you read to him— entertainment as a concept is entirely foreign to Unknown, so it’ll take him a while to figure out what kind of stories he likes to hear. Really, what he likes best is the sound of your voice and the fact that you actually listen when he expresses a boundary or a preference. If you ask very nicely and you’re very lucky, he’ll even let you kiss him on the forehead as he drifts off into dreamland. 

Even if he still only gets a few hours of sleep each night, at least he’s resting better than he was before you came to him.

[mxsticmess]

chat how are we feeling about saeyoung angst

[k0kichiimagines]

[look at her. i would die for her, i would kill for her. either way... what bliss.]

ray

Oh, he'd promised to visit you in the afternoon. Early enough for the day to still hold hours left of sunlight, but late enough that by the ending of your time together he could walk you back to your room in the evening sunset, let you be covered with the orange and red hues of the sky itself. But he couldn't resist, not when he had time spare - and you'd told him it was fine for him to visit any time, hadn't you? So... you would find this okay, right?

He watches your sleeping frame, the steady rise and fall of your chest under the soft silk pijamas he'd picked out specially for you, the lace suited you perfectly in his eyes. He leaned down to pull the floral bed sheets higher up on you, tucking you comfortably under them to ensure your warmth. He paused there, his hand slowly making it's way up to your cheek and brushing against your soft skin. For a second he regretted wearing gloves, his heart aching to feel your skin more clearly under his fingers. His head lowered to a breath away from your face.

"I would do anything for you, my prince/ss." And he would- truly anything. He'd never made such a declaration from his own choice, even he had to admit the Saviour had enforced his loyalty. But you didn't. You never did. You only treated him with soft kindness, never expecting a word in reply, loving him for the sake of loving him - and what sweet bliss it was to be so treasured by the one you treasure the most. And how dangerous it was, the idea that you held almost total control over him, a word from you and he'd obey without question - yet he never feared your innocent requests the way he did Ri- the saviours.

He allowed himself the soft satisfaction of pressing a kiss against your face, brushing your hair out of the way beforehand and holding his lips there for a second longer then he intended to. He drew back to catch your subconscious smile at his movements, and he felt himself smile in return without meaning to.

He should go. Rest for an hour and finish his work before your meeting. he should pull himself away from your peaceful expression and his mind filled with thoughts of you. But... it was Valentine's day, she'd understand if he stayed with you a little longer, wouldn't she?

[momomallowart]

ʕ⁠ ⁠ꈍ⁠ᴥ⁠ꈍ⁠ʔっ🌹💗 my love 💗

[mors-neptune]

707 / Luciel / Saeyoung Choi Headcanons I Have

‼️⚠️ SPOILERS AHEAD ⚠️‼️

• Has ADHD but if anyone brings it up he brushes it off because he thinks it makes him lesser. He’s not ableist he just needs to be educated :(

• I know in the official art he’s pretty pale but I hc him as having tanner skin and some freckles

• Has an undiagnosed personality disorder probably

• Too paranoid to go to church in person so he made a personal shrine in his home that he makes sure to spend time at

• Hates seeing his father on TV because it reminds him how similar they look. He’ll go into a weeks long depression every time where he’ll avoid mirrors because all he sees is his mother and father

• Loves cross dressing but is too scared to think deeply and self reflect about the gender euphoria it gives him because Korea isn’t very accepting

• Hated college because he felt like it was too structured and he doesn’t like being told what to do

• His favorite color is red (obviously)

• Doesn’t want or have any tattoos

• Most of the decor in his house was handmade impulsively and placed somewhere random

• Ultimately wants to move out of the bunker and into a more realistic house with no sci-fi-like doorbells or weapons but his paranoia stops him

• Sometimes stays up till the morning watching security cams in and around the bunker out of fear someone will try and hurt Saeran or MC

• Loves the dopamine hit that buying new cars gives him. It’s almost addicting impulse buying expensive things

• Desperately needs someone to match his neurodivergentness and thankfully his twin brother does perfectly

• His glasses are constantly dirty he never cleans those mfs

• Likes to paint his nails black but it’s always cracked and messed up

• Him and Saeran made up a secret language that they refuse to teach anyone else, even MC

• Welded flowers and spray painted them for him and MC’s anniversary (Saeran told him which flowers to make bc he knows their meanings)

• MC’s engagement ring is a Ruby (to represent Saeyoung) and whatever stone is MC’s favorite swirling together to look like a binary star system

• We know in his route that he has muscles because of his work, but after he runs from the agency, MC noticed some of his bulkiness going away

• But he still keeps a lot of his muscle, he just has some more squishiness around his torso

• Regrets his bunker not having windows because he knows Saeran loves looking at the sky

• Builds a garden in his backyard for Saeran :)

• Too paranoid to get a therapist so one of his more toxic traits is using MC as a therapist

• Goes through periods of not sharing anything emotionally with MC & sharing way too much and borderline dumping all his shit on them

• Has bad abandonment issues

• Loves experimenting with makeup and showing Saeran and MC

• Has both an inferiority and superiority complex

• Owns an obsessive amount of stuffed animals and yes, they all have names

• Idk if this is canon or not but he has curly hair

• I can’t believe I haven’t mentioned this already but I hc him as bisexual (he literally mentioned at some point that V’s voice was his type)

• And since it’s basically canon he at least finds V attractive and V is more of a parental/guardian figure to him, I can conclude Saeyoung 100% has daddy issues (duh)

• Has had feelings for Vanderwood at some point

• Horrible at personal hygiene

• Doesn’t drink or do drugs (canon)

• He’s a compulsive liar :/

• Wants a cat but is so bad at taking care of himself he doesn’t trust himself taking care of an animal

• Has staff constellation, and planet stickers & posters all over his room (he’s a nerd)

• Learns sign language so when he’s mad at MC or Saeran he only communicates through sign to piss them off

• Wayyyyyyy too comfy invading people’s personal and cyber privacy because of his line of work

• Lactose intolerant because I think it’s funny

• Light sleeper because of the house he grew up in and his work at the agency

• Kind of apathetic to traumatic things other people go through if it wasn’t as “bad” as his. Not in a “I think I’m better than you” kind of way, but in a way where some issues just don’t compare to an abusive, alcoholic mother, a politician father who wants to kill him, being a secret agent made to do who knows what, and more.

• Catches up on childhood by indulging in childish hobbies and interests. He’s making up for the lost time :(

• His tummy always hurts from his horrible diet

• His cologne smells like apple spice (it’s actually a perfume for women but who cares)

• But tbh on the daily he smells like a mix of his basic masculine body wash, honey buddah chips, and grease (sorry)

• Very protective. Takes on a caretaker role for those closest to him

• Sometimes very controlling. Gets anxious when he can’t control everything around him.

• Acts very parental towards Saeran. He always did because he had to in their childhood, but Saeyoing still does it. It makes him feel good being able to properly provide for Saeran.

• He mentioned in his route that he never really wanted or thought about having a family other than Saeran, and I feel like he would still think the same after meeting MC. Just now he thinks of his family as just him, Saeran, and MC. I don’t think he’d want kids

• Literally never cleans his sheets…

• Can only convince himself to clean anything in his house because he doesn’t want Saeran to have to live in filth again

My first post. I just wanted to share these :)

[k4txlulzz]

[not a ship post.]

mystic messenger 707 after ending secret endings are better than whatever happens with the twins in another story . saeran is allowed to be human and not a perfect little baby boy who is hyper-dependent on mc(the girl who he met a few days ago) . he gets rehabilitated by his twin brother who is the one person who has and will always understand him most(they are a lot more similar and mirror each other more than some ppl think). people say this saeran doesn't have enough agency but truth is he was not in the right state to make decisions and in ray's route and after ending it's just mc doing it instead of saeyoung anyway. again, saeyoung is the person who knows whats best for him, not mc. additionally, seven goes through exact same mental struggles as his brother(example: suicidal tendencies + inferiority and guilt complexes) and its BECAUSE of the fact that he overcame them that he can reassure his brother properly. furthermore, saeran mirrors his twin's way of thinking when he basically asks himself "do i deserve this good ending?"

this route also has the most correct characterization of seven that, unlike another story stuff(ray AE especially lol), does not paint saeyoung as the aggressive bad boy twin . that whole thing with him being feral when it comes to protecting his brother and standing up to the agency + his dad + v is something i do love but it is, again, used to make him "the angry troublemaker one" . he gets tortured for two weeks straight for god's sake and saeran not only isnt allowed to have a proper reaction to it but sae just quickly recovers like nothing AND is "not nice" for not forgiving the dude who just did all that to him, apparently😭to give cheritz the benefit of the doubt, this maybe could be chalked up to seven thinking lowly of himself again but that's debatable

secret ending choi twins>>>>>>>>>

even though i love them being sweet in another story and i still think it is a very happy ending for twins, it isn't the right characterization

[issacballsac]

Wishes to Unknown

Unknown/Saeran Choi

Male Reader

Joining the RFA had been nothing short of a fever dream to you

To anyone with an ounce of sanity even

So the <<Hi!>> of the very person responsible for your forceful recruitment into this organisation wasn’t exactly welcomed

<<Long time no see. We chatted before, remember?>>

With reluctant annoyance you did the very thing that got you in trouble at the start, responding.

<<Yep, what exactly are you messaging me for now?>>

<<Thanks to your help back then, I could preform my task without trouble.>>

<<Glad I could help🫂; you wouldn’t happen to be telling me what said task is/was?>>

<<Anyways. I told you I’m studying abroad, remember? But if you don’t it can’t be helped.>>

<<Yes I understand but why should I care about any of this?>>

<<Well—um…I’ll be back in Korea today. Remember I told you I’ll make it up to you if you help me? :)>>

<<So…>>

<<I’m not sure if I’m liking where this is going..>>

<<Do you have time today? Why don’t you join me to see the sky tonight? I have what I like to call a haven of sorts where I come whenever I visit Korea.>>

<<I’d love to go there with you.>>

<<Honestly, today is my birthday and you’re the only one who could properly congratulate it for me.>>

<<I promise you won’t regret it.>>

<<You have such a way with words—I almost forgot what happened last time you invited me to a mysterious location.>>

<<Look—>>

<<If you come to me. I’ll make it a VERY pleasant day for you. I even made you a crown with red roses. :)>>

<<Still not convinced dude. Bc if I get added to another group chat after this I will delete this app.>>

<<Okay ok; I’ll bring ice cream, Yk with summer it’s getting hot. We can also watch popular films? I’ll get everything ready I promise.>>

<<Youll join me, won’t you? I’ll be waiting for you.>>

UNKNOWN has left the chatroom

Every instinct in your body spiritual and physical told you not to go to the location sent to your phone.

BUT

Curiosity couldn’t kill the cat twice, could it?

Simply walking out of the apartment with your current attire as the event wasn’t that special to you; you began your search of the park.

The park was sparsely populated from the locator position the greatly mysterious UNKNOWN had graciously granted you

None matched the original picture he sent all those weeks ago

“Brown hair, green eyes. Brown hair, green eyes. Brown hair and green eyes.” You repeated as if it were a mantra looking over the same groups of people.

“Looking for me, my prince?”

“Indeed I was my dearest catfish. That’s obviously not you in the pictures.”

Almost unbothered by the comment he maintained eye contact, “Yes, well my identity is somewhat of a secret. Please try to understand, I can’t simply go throwing my image everywhere.”

“Sure sure. Anyways, happy birthday…Unknown? Got a name I can call you?”

“I’m a bit reluctant to say—no, it should be fine. Call me..”

“Shall I call you my stalking prince?”

His eyebrows furrowed towards his eyes, “If you’ll let me finish.”

“Yeah yeah, go ahead.”

Firmly clearing his throat, “It’s Saeran. But don’t go yelling it everywhere and definitely not to the RFA.”

“I won’t, I promise. But I really like your name, it’s nice to actually learn something about you.”

“Well you already know a lot. I’m not the guy from the photo, I hacked your phone on certain occasions, I like ice cream, and now you even know my name.”

“Yes we could almost get married with how much I know about you.”

“Though you are beautiful if you don’t mind the compliment. You’re not such a weirdo either, even if you did trick me into joining a strange charity.”

“Yes you make me sound SO amazing and dreamy.”

Taking a bite from out of his ice cream cone, “Yes, because you are, and I am totally not speaking out of my ass when I say this.”

“Enough of the chatting, I was promise a nice a pleasant day, so, show the way.”

Snickering slightly, Saeran stopped himself from reaching for you hand and opted for a follow-the-leader route.

On a secluded hill, a blanket lay bare with a singular unbranded laptop at the centre. A brown woven basket sat not far from the main attraction.

“Birthday picnic?”

He sat down calmly on the blanket. Lightly yet rapidly clicking on the keys of the keyboard.

The soft white light beamed against his already pale face, “Any suggestions for a movie?”

“I thought we were starting gazing.”

He quirked a brow at your remark.

“The constellation I want to see isn’t out yet. In the meantime won’t you accompany me?”

A small rotation of movies was shown before you both ultimately decided to just wait.

“Sae look! Isn’t that the constellation you wanted to see?”

His eyes snapped up as the stars aligned perfectly. A small smile was rapidly tugging at his face. “Sae?”

“A—sorry, it was just shorter.”

“I don’t mind it.”

Readjusting yourself on the mat, you took another spoonful of the mass amount of mint ice cream your newly acquired partner brought.

“Hey, so do you like—wish on the constellations? Or is it just the individual stars?”

“I’d call you stupid, but, I don’t know myself.”

“Here. I’ll wish you another happy birthday for each one of the stars in the constellation.”

“That’s a lot of stars you know?”

“I have all night and tomorrow morning.”

An actual laugh escaped from him, a laugh that had been held in for years it seemed. A pure and genuine expression.

“You know…there are better ice cream flavours than mint.”

“Don’t ruin my birthday. Please.”

This was based off of his 2019 birthday event

@viernane

[marshmallowprotection]

Can I request se saeran hurt/comfort with an MC that's scared to tell him she's in love with him and his system? Tyyyy

SE Saeran is afraid of love. He's afraid to accept it for what it is, and why wouldn't he be scared to open his heart? Every time he trusted someone new, they left him alone, and no matter the reason behind their departure, it left Saeran in a place where he had no choice but to wonder if it was his fault... his fault for trusting them with the soft, gentle part of himself that didn't know how to do anything but trust the people who smiled at him and said it would be okay in the end.

It was okay, if you consider surviving a nightmare for half a decade in a cult that taught him to believe he was a weapon built for causalities and destruction, "okay". If you consider that to be okay, perhaps, you may also consider the brief moment of freedom good, after spending his childhood locked away by rope and key with no hope to get out of there without his big brother, okay.

There's a part of him that believes a moment of freedom, sun on his face, and grass between his toes was crueler than the years of pain and suffering. Because... knowing what it felt like to be a free man, if only briefly, to have it snatched away once again was a joke. It made his existence feel like a cruel joke, as if God only allowed him to live a life on Earth to be some sort of cosmic punchline.

Even to this day, he's struggling with his sense of autonomy since he has a limited range of choice over his life.

But, you know what?

Being with you? Sitting down at the park with his head on your lap while neither of you say a single word, you just bask in the moment for what it is. He can never feel wholly safe, but being with you is as close as it gets. He can't always tell you how he feels, words aren't a simple thing, after all. Words can be empty, they fall in an instant as easily as a promise can, so he finds himself valuing action more than anything else.

You understand him like nobody else does, and he doesn't have to try to be something he's not. He gets to be himself... he gets to exist. He doesn't know how to phrase that feeling into words, that's why it's so much easier for him to sit down with you, rest his head against your shoulder, and fall asleep.

Maybe it's hard for you to understand how a person feels about you if they don't say it, maybe you feel insecure in your darkest moments because there's always a question of:

What if he doesn't love me the way I love him?

You don't need to be afraid of that. Because, for you to have fallen in love with him, you would've had to have been his friend first, and that takes months... not days... not weeks. He needed time to warm up to you, to know you as a friend he could trust, and for you to be his best friend, that means he already cares about you more than he thought he could care about another person in his heart that seemed as cold as ice.

Don't be afraid to tell him.

Saeran Choi trusting you enough to be his friend already means his heart is open to yours if you want.

If you cry to him, pouring your heart out, he may have a strained look on his face, but it's not because he doesn't like you. It's because he's just as much in love with you, and he doesn't know how to express it outside of offering you his open arms. If you're willing to put up with a lifetime of him, trauma and all, he's willing to take a risk on being vulnerable once more.

[natasha-in-space]

Hi Natasha!! I feel like I disappeared and just... never came back lol

Though I'm here to request! This time for Saeran :o

Seeing as I'm planning on starting Ray route soon, could we have a story about Saeran finally being able to confide within you after ages of ignoring his own feelings? I'd imagine that the MC would pry it out of him after noticing he's been acting odd lately. You could take a school setting or canon setting; whatevers easier!

Or, if that doesn't make sense, you could write something about Ray breaking down over feeling helpless; where he thinks that he doesn't do enough/isn't enough for MC.

Or... you could combine the two ideas and write the whole story about Saeran.

SO sorry if this confused you. Ignore it if it did! its completely fine :3

Hi-Hi, lovely to see you back!! <3 I decided to go with SE Saeran for this one, both because I'm currently in my SE Saeran brainrot and because this seems fitting for him. Good luck on your Ray route playthrough! Make sure to have lots of tissues nearby, because you're about to go on a very wild ride of emotions. Also, for future notice, my name's Mia! Natasha is the name of my OC (dw it's kinda a common thing with my url but I don't wanna change it at this point xD)

"...We all know that something is wrong, you know."

Saeran doesn't pay attention to you while you carefully make your presence known by shuffles of your feet against the floor. You are aware that he heard you. He just doesn't say nor do anything to show it. And that worries you.

Saeran was always the quiet, closed-off type. Not like you could blame him, considering all he had to go through. Similar to a feral cat, you've always respected his silent need for space and freedom. If he wanted to talk, he would talk. If he had a desire to spend time with you, he would approach you on his own. You simply demonstrated your desire to be close to him, so that he would know that you wanted him near you.

But... Even you could sense that something wasn't right today. Saeyoung felt it almost immediately, whether it was thanks to their inherent twin connection or his natural tendency to worry about his younger brother. However, just because Saeyoung knew something was wrong doesn't mean he can do anything about it, unless Saeran openly allows him to.

And he was definitely not doing that.

You had to rush down to the kitchen because you heard the sound of glass breaking, and then Saeran shouting. Upon your arrival, the younger twin had already left the room, only giving you a quick unfocused glance before pushing past you. Thankfully, no one was hurt. You talked with Saeyoung in hushed voices as you both cleaned up the broken shards, offering him some comfort in the process. Although you were concerned about Saeran, Saeyoung was equally important to you. Whenever those kinds of incidents happened, his well-being was just as important. Even if he often refuses to acknowledge it.

It seems that Saeran must have cut himself while preparing dinner, and somehow, this turned into an outburst once Saeyoung became worried and tried to help. Both of you acknowledged that there is a deeper issue at play here. Something underlying right under the surface. And it was probably something very unpleasant.

In the end, you both agreed to have you go and attempt to speak with Saeran. Since you weren't present during the entire scene. So, now here you were, silently standing over the younger twin as he sat on the couch, his back turned to you. It hurt your heart to see him hunched over like that, almost like he was curling in on himself. The position didn't appear to be comfortable to be in.

"Saeran, please... tell me what's wrong. I can see you are in pain." Your voice is soft and quiet. You don't want to accidentally push him away. You slowly take a seat on the edge of the couch, a small distance away from him to give him space to breathe and not get overwhelmed.

He shifts ever so slightly, a jerky movement leaving him with a shaky breath. It was probably supposed to be a huff, but it was far too weak to sound like one.

"...I'm fine."

You sigh. "You're not. Look... You don't have to tell me everything, ok? But, I can see that you are in pain, and I want to help you. So... just tell me what you need. I won't ask for anything more."

That seemed to reassure him just a little bit, judging by the way his shoulders lowered, and he paused, possibly thinking over your request. You didn't say anything, only allowing him to do this at his own pace.

At last, there was a reply.

But instead of verbalizing, he just shifts to sit up on the couch and turns over to you. He doesn't look at you, but quietly pulls out his hand and shows it to you. His palm is caked with relatively fresh blood, a decently sized cut being the source of the red substance painting over his skin. It wasn't anything serious by any means, but it sure looked painful.

However... something told you it wasn't the cut that bothered him. Saeran refused to examine his hand. His head was turned away, and his red bangs were falling over his eyes, making it difficult for you to see his face. But, his lips were pressed together into a thin, tense line. You also couldn't help but notice the ungodly tremble in his hands. They were shaking violently. In a way that clearly showed distress without saying a word.

You carefully grasped his wrist, inspecting the cut. Most of the bloody mess was caused by him smearing the blood over his palm, and it didn't seem as bad as you thought at first. Gently rubbing your thumb over his wrist, you pulled away. "I'll clean it up for you, ok? Just wait here."

He didn't respond, but he did give you a brief nod. You now have all the green light you needed.

Saeran hadn't said a word to you until you wrapped a clean gauze over his palm and gently patted his arm to let him know that you were done. The cautiousness with which he turned to look at his hand was unmistakable. Almost like he was sure he'll see something utterly horrifying in its place. The shaky sigh of relief he did let out, though, made you smile. He flexed his hand a bit and turned it around to look over it fully.

"...Thank you."

The murmur was both quiet and soft. Genuine. His mint eyes were filled with earnest gratitude when he looked at you, and that was all you needed. You merely smiled, giving him a nod. "Of course. Do you feel better now?"

Another nod.

"That's wonderful. I'll go put away the medkit, and-"

"-Wait."

As he grasped at your sleeve, you stopped and turned around to look at him. Once again, his face was turned away from you, but this time it was a far more bashful gesture than a distressed one. You weren't completely sure, but you thought you could see a hint of pink dusting over his cheeks.

Saeran breathed a sigh, almost like he was preparing himself before saying anything. Then, he pulled you back a little bit. "...Stay. Please."

There was no need for you to hear anything else.

And so, that's how you ended up holding him close as you both huddled up on the couch, your chin resting on top of his head as he buried his face in your chest. For a while, only the sounds of your shared breaths filled the space. You promised him you wouldn't ask for anything, and you were not about to go back on that promise.

Saeran was the one who spoke up.

"Is... Hyung alright?"

Humming, you raised your hand to run your fingers through his unruly hair. The main purpose is to keep him calm and relaxed. "He's okay. Very worried about you, though."

Saeran tenses a bit, but then sighs heavily, almost in defeat. You bite back on the desire to push him for answers.

"I... didn't mean to scream at him like that. I just-"

A shaky breath. You squeeze him a bit tighter, your other hand rubbing soothing circles on his back.

"You don't have to say anything you don't want to say, Saeran. None of us blame you."

"-You should."

It was up to you to be the one to sigh now.

"Saeran..."

He shakes his head, but his grip on you tightens, his voice becoming shakier by the moment. It seemed as though he was engaged in a mental battle with himself. It hurt you to be unable to do anything but just hold him and let him talk.

"You know why I started screeching at him for no reason? There must be some rational explanation, right? That's what you think. Well, there isn't. I-" Another shaky breath. The sound of this one was almost like a sob. Your heart started pounding in your chest with anxiety. "I cut my hand on the knife, and just the sight of blood on my hands set me off. I threw a glass bowl at my brother because of a fucking cut on my hand."

You didn't answer right away. Gathering your thoughts and emotions is definitely necessary before you proceed and say something you might regret later. You should be careful here.

So that's what happened... Now that you thought about it, the sight of blood did always make Saeran very uncomfortable. But, to see it coating his hands... Well, you didn't have to guess for long. All three of you were aware of what actually occurred to V on that day.

And what a heavy burden Saeran had to carry with him for the rest of his life.

"Oh... Saeran..."

"-Just-" At this point, it was clear that he was crying. His entire body was shaking with silent sobs as he pressed himself further into you, almost like he was trying to hide from the world in your embrace. "Just hold me. Please. I- I feel so sick..."

So you do. Without uttering a single word. Holding him is what you do. You will have a proper conversation about it once he lets it all out.

Until then, you will be there for him to be his support.

[banjjakz]

DUDE if you like otome games you should totally play Nameless, I won’t spoil who but there is a lot of deranged activity in that game 👀

Do you…per chance…have any Thoughts on any of your favorite guys from otome games, too? I thought I’d ask because the content for a lot of them is so niche and we share a similar taste in faves haha

*googles nameless* *sees it's developed my cheritz* yeah it's gotta be a certified freakshow

while we're on the topic of cheritz games and favorite otome guys, allow me to divulge some personal and vulnerable information. choi saeran and i have been partnered for several years. he is the original, irreplaceable, number one, held above all else, peerless, most perfect, heart-wrenchingly, soul-crushingly, meltdown-inducing, PRICELESS baby girl. unlocked all endings. played that bastard 707's route just so i could read the secret endings, too. deconstructed his after-ending within a week of release. for the first time in my life i created a DNI page on a carrd just for it to warn V and Rika fans to stay far, far away (for their sake)

will never write content for him. he's just like so perfect that any attempt of mine would do him a grave disservice. that being said, here is one of the best pieces of fanfiction i have ever read in my entire life as far as characterization goes. this author is to saeran what i aspire one day to be to yuuta.

let me abstain from speaking any further. just know that it is merely a fine layer of flesh which houses terrible awful things (<-unconditional and unwavering love for choi saeran)

[password-door-lock]

My job has been putting me through hell lately, so I’ve been thinking a lot about how Saeran might comfort you after you’ve had a rough day at work.

There are two possible universes where you’d be around Ray and still be working. The first option is the prologue bad end timeline where you’re his assistant. In that case, if you start to get tired or frustrated with your workload, Ray will probably just take over for you and do the work himself. He doesn’t like to see you struggling, and he’s already accustomed to finishing his tasks without any help. He’ll make sure you have something good to eat and somewhere comfortable to rest while he takes care of everything. The other option is after V’s AE, in which case Ray would be a little bit unsure of how to comfort you after a long day. He’s worried about hurting you: he doesn’t want to be too overbearing, but he also doesn’t want to make you feel isolated by giving you too much distance. He’ll probably end up directly asking you what he can do to help you unwind, and then he’ll follow through with it as best he can. He wants to learn as much as he can about what makes you feel better. Please don’t hesitate to ask him for what you want! 

Similar to Ray, Suit would wind up in this situation in one of two ways. If you’re his assistant and you complain about the work, he’ll be quick to just send you away. Unlike Ray, he’s not a patient person, and he has no interest in taking the time to teach you something he could do twice as quickly on his own. Suit wouldn’t go out of his way to coddle you, but he probably wouldn’t stop you if you went to get a snack or something— after all, he’s not playing with you right now, so he doesn’t care where you are or what you’re doing. He has twice as much important work to do now, so you should stay out of his way and let him get it done. VAE Suit, on the other hand, might be at a loss for how to comfort you. He may assume that you’d rather be with Ray when you’ve had a bad day. But actually, Saeran is a great person to vent to. He likes seeing you get animated, and he's comfortable enough with you to offer his own snide remarks, as well. He’ll have a pretty good time listening to you complaining about your coworkers, especially if there’s a trip to the ice cream shop involved. You’ll both be cheered up by the experience, although you probably shouldn’t expect him to get all mushy about it.

GE Saeran is much more self assured in how he comforts you. He’ll make sure that there’s a nice bath waiting for you when you come home. Either he’d join you and order takeout after or he’d cook some dinner for you while you enjoy a nice, relaxing soak on your own. He won’t let you do any dishes or other chores around the house until you’ve had at least a little rest, and even then, he’ll be extra attentive to your needs. In the morning, he’ll get up early and make sure that you get a good breakfast before work. Saeran knows you very well by now, so he’s familiar with your favorite things— expect a few of them to come your way in the near future, especially if your troubles at work are prolonged. He’s here for you if you want to vent— Saeran is a very attentive listener— but if you just want to take your mind off things, he can handle that, too. If the extra attention ever makes you feel guilty for taking more than you give, he’ll be quick to remind you that you’ve done the same for him countless times, and right now it’s his turn to look after you. 

If you’re Unknown’s assistant, then he is your stressful day at work. He’s not going to comfort you and he’s not going to pick up your slack like Ray or Suit— he knows what you’re capable of and if he gives you an assignment to complete, then he expects you to complete it. If you’ve caught him in a particularly good mood, you might get a few patronizing words, a pat on the head, and a direct order to finish your work, now, prince(ss). If he’s having a bad day, Unknown might not even dignify your complaints with a response. You already know what his expectations are, after all. However, if you’re not his assistant yet, you might be able to get Unknown’s attention by texting him some RFA secrets or other quality information. In exchange, he’ll let you call him and complain about your job for a bit, and then he’ll coo at you and promise to save you before abruptly hanging up. The conversation will be a nice break for both of you, but eventually, you’ll both have to return to your respective work. 

SE Saeran has no idea how to help you when you complain about your job. He feels like it’s weird of you to come to him when you have the whole RFA at your disposal, but he won’t say anything about it. He’s glad that he can be someone you trust, even if he doesn’t understand why. Saeran will sit with you for as long as you need while you vent about your work if that’s what you’d like— but he won’t judge you if you just want to quietly relax for a while. He’ll put on some music or a nature documentary and the two of you can rest together for as long as you need. His method of giving comfort is very subtle, but that’s nice after a hectic day. He’s somebody you can take your mask off around, and he knows what it feels like to be overworked. He might be a little bit blunt about telling you what he thinks about the way your colleagues and clients/customers treat you, but he won’t press too much: after all, he knows that it’s not always easy or possible to immediately leave a difficult situation.

[erimeows]

Dye

Saeyoung Choi is sick of having red hair. 

It’s three in the morning as the redhead stands in front of the mirror in his bathroom, golden eyes tired and body covered in nothing but a black tank-top and matching boxer shorts. He’s exhausted and should really be in bed considering that he has to take Saeran to therapy at eight, but his dreams have rendered him unable to sleep yet again. He drums his fingers against the edge of the marble that lines the counter, his eyes on the two boxes of bleach and the box of toner that are sat there. 

There’s a shower cap over his hair, that of which is soaking in a copious amount of coconut oil. It’s been that way for a few hours, just as the tutorial he googled at 12AM told him. As he follows the instructions on the first bottle of bleach to develop it before pulling out his phone and logging into the RFA chatroom. 

707 has entered the chatroom.

707: hey guys!

707: guess what

Yoosung☆: What is it Seven?

707: I’M DYEING MY HAIR

Jumin Han: Right now?

Yoosung☆: What color??

707: It’s a surprise!

707: d:

707: You’ll have to catch the glory of it in person next time you see me! I’m still working on it as we speak : D

ZEN: You have such a beautiful natural red that people would kill for and you’re over here dyeing it…

Seven feels his stomach drop at that, a little offended. He’s been wanting to dye his hair for years to escape the striking resemblance he has to his mother. After the new member joined the RFA and everything went to shit, leading to the discovery of Mint Eye and the retrieval of Saeran, things have calmed down somewhat. Saeran is back from the psychiatric ward he was placed in for a few months and is now living along with Seven and Vanderwood in Seven’s large home. The new member has settled into a comfortable romantic relationship with Jaehee (who deserves to be happy after all her years of servitude under Jumin) and helped the former assistant with her new coffee shop. Everything is peaceful and Seven has gotten a lot of closure regarding the situation (minus what has happened with V and Rika, who have been impossible for him to track down), and things are settling.

Seven is ready to escape the past somehow now that things have changed. What better way to do that than to change his classic look?

ZEN: Seven, I sure hope this is just one of your pranks. If not… RIP beautiful red hair T_T

Jumin Han: Seven.

And now Jumin’s there. 

Honestly, Seven didn’t expect for the older man to be online so late, but seeing his name pop up on the chat log makes him smile. While the rest of the RFA may see them as nothing more than friends, their relationship crossed into romantic territory a while ago and their one year anniversary is in less than two weeks. They’ve agreed that for both of their safety, it’s best to keep their relationship under wraps until everything settles down and Jumin inherits C&R from Chairman Han, but that doesn’t bother Seven too much. He’s used to keeping secrets, anyhow.

707: YES DADDY!?!??

ZEN: I suddenly feel very nauseous.

Yoosung☆: Same… ew. 

Jumin Han: Can I call you?

Seven’s heart skips a beat at that. 

707: Yes, daddy (;

Jumin Han: Don’t call me that here. You’re going to disturb the other members.

707: Fine, fine. Master it is, then!

707: Talk to you in a minute then, master Jumin (;

707 has left the chatroom.

Jumin Han has left the chatroom.

Yoosung☆: So are we just going to ignore all of that?

ZEN: For the sake of my sanity and mental health?

ZEN: Yeah

ZEN: We are going to ignore all of it.

Yoosung☆: Ight then ima dip.

Yoosung☆ has left the chatroom.

ZEN has left the chatroom. 

Seconds later, Seven’s phone starts to ring. He answers the call, sets it on speaker, and places the device face-up on the bathroom counter. Then, he puts on the gloves that came with the bleach and starts on his hair. Part of him thinks it’ll turn out great. The other part of him suspects that it’ll be ugly or botched enough for him to have to wear a wig over it, especially considering that his glasses are abandoned in his bedroom and he can hardly see anything.

“Jumin, why are you calling this early?” Seven asks and smiles when he hears Jumin’s low, sleepy voice on the other line.

“Is it early or is it late for you, Saeyoung? It sounds as if you’ve been awake all night,” Jumin subtly calls Seven out like he always does.

“You’re not wrong, but why are you awake?”

“Ah… I woke up on my own. I could sense that you were awake, waiting for me.”

Seven chuckles.

“I don’t know if that’s romantic or creepy.”

“Interpret it as you please, but did you mean what you said in the chatroom?”

“What, about calling you master?” Seven snarks with a quirked brow and starts to paint his hair with the bleach solution.

“No, about dyeing your hair.”

“Oh, yeah, no, I was a hundred percent serious! I’m actually doing it right now!”

“What color?”

“White.”

“...In one night? Won’t that damage it severely?”

Admittedly, Jumin has a point. Hair-bleaching is something you should go get done at a salon, and it’s also something you should only do once every few months to avoid damage to your hair. Bleaching it back to back comes with the risk of frying it off. Seven knows that. He just doesn’t care all that much.

“I don’t care if it does. Worst comes to worst, my hair starts falling out or turning brittle so I have to shave my head and wear a wig for a couple of months. I think I’ll live.”

“Alright, then…” Jumin trails off. There’s an awkward few seconds of silence that makes Seven wonder if the older man hung up until he looks down at the screen to see that the call is still going. Finally, Jumin speaks again. “Are you doing okay?”

“Hm? What do you mean?”

“You usually only make sudden, drastic changes to your physical appearance when you’re struggling mentally.”

Seven’s stomach drops at that- mostly because it’s true. He’s done crazy shit to his hair, pierced his own body, and gotten a variety of tattoos when under immense stress. Most of the time, he doesn’t regret any of it, but sometimes… Well, sometimes it’s gone terribly; an infected piercing here, an ugly tattoo there, the occasional hat-over-his-head-for-a-few-months. Still, he tries to deny it, because denying his problems is something that Seven is accustomed to.

“C’mon, Jumin! That’s ridiculous! When have I ever done that?”

“Well… Do you recall illegally buying a tattoo gun to tattoo your own chest a few years back?”

Seven flinches and thinks of touching his chest before realizing that his gloved hands are drenched in hair bleach. Still, he remembers it like yesterday- a shitty hand-done cross with crooked lines that he had to have covered up a few years later. The new piece is nice, the ugly cross turned into a cross-marked gravestone with flowers all over it to cover the bad line-work. Though he wouldn’t say it out loud, he wishes he’d never had any of it done in the first place.

“Yes, yes, I remember! Are you not going to let me live that down?”

“Considering that you cried and squeezed my hand so hard that you nearly broke the bones in it when I took you to go get a cover up done for it last year because of how badly it hurt? No, I’m not.”

“Okay, that was one time when I was like fifteen, and have you ever gotten a tattoo before? Yeah, I didn’t think so! Those bitches hurt!”

Seven can’t help but be defensive about it. After all, his least favorite thing in their relationship is when Jumin tries to scold and parent him like he’s a child. It’s embarrassing, especially coming from someone who didn’t have to grow up nearly as fast as he did- from someone who was handed a kind father and an entire empire from the very start instead of the shit hand that Seven got. And it’s true that Jumin is a responsible adult, much more responsible than Seven, but still. Seven is a prideful man who hates feeling like he’s being talked down to. 

“Alright, fine. How about the instance a couple years ago where you got snake bite piercings done on your tongue and complained afterwards because you couldn’t eat solid food for a week?”

Seven’s frustration quickly builds. Jumin won’t just drop the issue, nor will Jumin allow him so much as a moment to defend himself.

“That was-”

“And when you were eighteen and got gauges in your ears that you tried to upgrade too fast to the point where you had a gauge blowout?”

“Jumin, that’s different!” Seven exclaims.

“You still hide your ears with your hair because of that. Your earlobes are deformed around the holes because of it and they won’t close back. It’s serious,” Jumin continues, going on and on. Seven’s eyes flicker to the mirror and land on his ears, which are- as Jumin said- incredibly scarred and misshapen around the perimeter of his gauges. “And I know you haven’t changed since then, either. Right after we brought Saeran back, you went and pierced your own belly button and it still hasn’t fully healed. Remember when you had to take antibiotics for the infection that gave you?”

“I thought you said it looked good!”

“It does look good now that it’s not red and oozing with puss from a localized bacterial infection. I never said I didn’t like any of the things I’ve mentioned, just that they’ve been rash decisions made under intense stress that you’ve complained about or suffered because of later. I don’t want you going and dyeing your hair only to hate it or risk burning your scalp with bleach, but since you’ve already started the process, I suppose I can’t stop you… Saeyoung, you really need to go to a professional next time.”

“Really? You’re going to judge me for this?”

“I’m not judging you, I’m concerned. There’s a difference.”

“Fine, Jumin… If you’re going to be like that-”

“Saeyoung,” Jumin cuts him off once more, but this time, his tone is much softer. The tension seeps from Seven’s body as the ravenette tries to calm him down. “I’m not judging you. What you’re doing is an unhealthy coping mechanism of yours and I’m trying to make you aware of it so you don’t go and do it again. I’ll stop talking about it if it’s upsetting you so much, but please bring it up to your therapist at your next appointment and get her input.”

“Yeah, okay,” Seven replies. He’s sure it sounds sarcastic, because in all honesty, he didn’t want to hear any of the rants that Jumin just went on about his bad coping mechanisms. Part of getting closer to the RFA and maintaining close personal relationships is accepting concern from others, though, even if it’s expressed in a way that he doesn’t always like. “...Thank you for worrying.”

“What’s got you so stressed out?”

“Who said I’m stressed out?”

“Well, you’re up past three in the morning dyeing your hair. You know you can tell me, Saeyoung.”

Seven sighs and finishes covering his hair in the bleach, careful to cover it so the color develops properly. Then, he answers Jumin’s question while disposing of his gloves and sitting on the bathroom counter. 

“It’s Saeran… He was doing pretty good for a few week stint there, going on walks with me and coming out for meals, but he’s been getting bad again over the last couple days and I’m scared he’s going into a depressive episode. Any time I go to check on him he ignores me or tells me to go away.”

“Can you not just go into his room?”

And of course Jumin would say that because he doesn’t understand being mentally ill- at least not in the way that Saeran is. Since the younger man has moved in with Seven, it’s been a relief, but it’s also been difficult. Between making sure Saeran eats, drinks, showers, and goes to therapy, Seven is starting to crumble. On top of that, following RFA’s party, he hasn’t been able to track down V or RIka- so God knows what they’re up to. 

“Not really? It’s a fine balance, you know! That’s his safe space, I don’t want to invade it unless it’s a life or death situation,” Seven explains. He remembers clearing out his old work room and setting it up for Saeran before he came home from the psychiatric ward. It looks completely different with a brand new bed, a desk, a television, bookshelves, and curtains that weren’t there before. Unfortunately, even though Seven offered to take Saeran to buy decorations and help him personalize it, Saeran hasn’t taken him up on the offer. So, the room has remained incredibly bland and bleak. “I told him that the room I gave him is his to decorate and live in as he pleases and that I won’t go in there without his permission. Plus, he’s an adult… He’s capable of making his own decisions! I can’t infantalize him just because he’s struggling with his mental health. I mean, I’m almost as bad as he is, I just… He’s been through more, and he hasn’t had the chance to really live as his own person- as an adult- like I have.”

“I don’t think it’s fair to either of you for you to compare traumas. Don’t think like that.”

Suddenly, the conversation is far too tense and far more personal than it should be. Seven is at a point where he doesn’t really need to do anything but wait for a half hour to wash the bleach out of his hair, but he figures he can use it as an excuse to hang up on his overly-concerned boyfriend.

“You’re right. Well, I’m going to get off here and finish my hair! I’m pretty sure by the time it develops and everything, I’ll have to take Saeran to his weekly therapy session, so I’ve gotta haul ass.”

“Alright, then. I look forward to seeing how it turns out,” Jumin responds. Seven can hear his smile through the phone. “I love you, Saeyoung.”

“I love you, too… Jumin. Go back to bed and get some rest if you can.”

“I’ll try. Talk to you soon, then.”

Then, Jumin hangs up, leaving Seven with no one but himself and this bleached hair that he’s sure to regret.

Somehow, with enough bleach, a shit ton of toner, and probably a pound of coconut oil, Seven manages to get his hair bright white without making it fall out. Unfortunately, it leaves him with so little time that he can’t even spare half an hour to get a nap in. When he approaches Saeran’s door around 7AM, he’s exhausted and a little loopy.

He knocks, his fist lightly tapping the wood three times. No response. After a couple minutes, he knocks again. Still no response. 

“Saeran, are you awake?” Seven asks, to which Saeran snaps at him.

“What do you want?”

“We need to go to your therapy appointment! C’mon, let’s go- we’re gonna be late if we don’t leave in the next ten minutes!”

“I already texted my therapist,” Seven’s stomach drops at those words. It makes sense that Saeran wants to skip after the decline he’s had over the past few days. It’s frustrating. All he wants is for Saeran to feel better and it just can’t happen fast enough. “I’m not going today.” 

“What? Saeran, we talked about this! You can’t just skip therapy because you don’t feel like going- hell, the times you don’t want to go are the times you need to the most! You have to be consistent if you want to feel better,” The words are met with silence. Seven lets out a groan. Sometimes, he wishes Saeran would argue or scream or hit rather than just close himself off entirely. Part of him wants nothing more than for Saeran to take out all of the pent up sorrow and rage he’s been bottling up on him. But it doesn’t work like that, and neither does Saeran. The only thing that will make things better is time and effort, and Seven knows that. He has to be patient. “Okay, fine. Did you at least schedule a virtual appointment for today.”

“No.”

Seven frowns and holds his head in his hands. His long, shaky fingers tangle in his hair. The wavy locks are totally fried.

“Okay, did you take your meds?”

“No, now fuck off!”

“Wow, um… Sure, I guess! I’m going out for a bit,” Seven says and clears his throat. He’s embarrassed, uncomfortable, and confused. He’s tried to do everything right, but he can’t make Saeran happy by himself and it’s killing him. “Vanderwood’s here if you need anything, or if you don’t feel comfortable asking him, you can just call me. I love you!”

Seven receives no response. Dejected, he decides he’ll at least try to get out of the house. Maybe seeing Zen will lift his spirits…

~

Zen is working on a new movie, so Seven goes to see the actor on set whenever it’s time for his lunch break. How he gets in without clearance, none of them need to know. He knocks on the door of Zen’s large dressing room and barges in before he gets an answer. Zen, who is sitting at the vanity doing his makeup, spins around in his chair after nearly jabbing his eye out with an eyeliner pencil to face Seven with a pointed look.

“Zen!” Seven greets excitedly and stands in the doorway.

“Wow, Seven! I didn’t recognize you for a second there, uh,” Zen looks a little guilty, but that doesn’t stop him from saying the following words as he points to Seven’s hair. “Please tell me that’s a wig.”

“No, it’s not! I dyed it, remember?” Seven reminds him, just hoping that he forgot the conversation from the chatroom last night. Though, he suspects that Zen remembers and just hates how it looks. “C’mon, don’t tell me it’s that bad!”

“It’s not bad, per say… Just doesn’t work with your skin tone. I liked the red a lot better.”

At that, Seven sighs and tries to change the subject. So Zen doesn’t like his hair. With such a sudden change, and with Zen being so particular about beauty, it makes sense. So what? Surely, someone else will like it. Despite the awkward feelings of hurt and rejection that swirl around in the pit of his stomach, Seven plasters on a smile and asks Zen about his upcoming role. 

That night is LOLOL night with Yoosung. Seven almost forgets that it’s happening until he’s reminded with an ‘omw’ text from Yoosung half an hour before it’s supposed to start. He panics and thinks of just canceling it, citing some fake illness or emergency, but then he remembers that Yoosung is one of the few people who can actually get Saeran out of his room. So, he sends back a simple text saying ‘okay’, sets up snacks and drinks at the coffee table, gets his PC set up in the living room, and shoots Saeran a text to let him know that Yoosung will be there.

Right around eight, Yoosung shows up. Seven answers the door and excitedly greets his good friend while leaning against the doorway.

“Hey, Yoosung, you ready for LOLOL night? I’ve got Honey Buddha chips and PHD Pepper set up at the coffee table and-!”

“Seven, what’d you do to your hair?” Yoosung asks with wide violet eyes as he reaches forward and touches one of the dry, bright white strands.

“I dyed it last night, remember? Pretty snazzy, huh? What do you think?”

“No offense, but it looks pretty weird on you! Can’t say I ever expected you to go white,” Yoosung mutters and walks past Seven and into the living room. Seven shuts and locks the door behind them, then goes with Yoosung to the living room couch. The two men sit together with Yoosung still talking about Seven’s new look as he digs his own laptop out of his school backpack. “You even did your brows! You really gotta give us a warning, man, I thought I was having an aneurysm or something when I saw you with white hair!”

“...Huh,” Seven disguises a frown with a fake smile, nothing new. He expected Zen to dislike his new hair, but Yoosung, too? It makes him anxious. If those two have already reacted so badly (i.e. clearly being taken aback and not liking it, but trying to feign that it’s not terrible even though they clearly think it is), what will Jaehee, Jumin, and Saeran say when they see it? “Well, that aside, have you made any progress on that game event yet?”

“Oh, yeah, that reminds me! I…”

Yoosung opens his laptop to show Seven his progress on the event, excitedly rambling with a grin that Seven can’t help but find endearing- a grin that Saeran would find endearing, too, if he would’ve responded to Seven’s text and surfaced from his room instead of leaving the former agent on read. 

Seven opens his laptop as well, and with that, LOLOL night starts- even without Saeran.

~~

Saeran never does surface from his room for LOLOL night, much to Seven’s surprise. He figures that the younger man’s depression must be pretty bad right now, but at the very least, there’s signs that he’s alive (the occasional shuffling noise, leaving Seven’s texts on read, etc.), so Seven is relieved.

Still, he’s worried, and he misses his little brother’s face. With Yoosung’s presence not working to draw Saeran out, and with Seven’s attempts at texting Saeran or visiting his room working to draw Saeran out, he decides he’ll do the next best thing; lure Saeran out with ice cream and coffee. Having not seen the former assistant in a while anyway, Seven goes to Jaehee’s coffee shop. 

When Seven opens the front door, a bell rings. Jaehee, whose hair has grown out to her shoulders, rushes to the counter. Though there are plenty of people seated in the cafe who are enjoying their drinks and sweet treats, no one is in line, so Seven approaches the register to talk to her.

“Jaehee, how are ya?” He asks, but he doesn’t get an answer- instead, he gets a comment (or a few) about his newly dyed hair.

“Oh my, Seven… You’ve dyed your hair,” Jaehee reaches out with her perfectly manicured, coffee-brown finger nails. The paint on them is glossy and covered in a light sheen of glitter clear coat. It’s clear that she wants to touch Seven’s hair, but she doesn’t, probably realizing just how impolite it is. Jaehee allows her hands to fall to her side as she continues. “I saw that you’d mentioned it in the chat room the other night, but I honestly thought it was just one of your pranks. Is that permanent dye, or…?”

“It is,” Seven nods. “I guess you’re the only one who hasn’t seen it yet, huh?”

“It’s quite… Different,” Jaehee says with a forced smile, to which Seven gasps and exclaims-

“Oh, come on, Jaehee, don’t tell me you hate it too!”

“No, no, I think you did a good job,” Jaehee frantically rushes to correct herself, even if it’s already too late. It’s obvious that she doesn’t like it, just like Zen and Yoosung. “It’ll just take some getting used to. It works for you, really.”

“...Thanks,” “Can I just get a large caramel frappe, a pint of the homemade vanilla bean ice cream, and a medium iced mocha with a breakfast sandwich to go?”

“Of course,” Jaehee nods, but doesn’t ring anything up. She turns to make the drinks, grab the breakfast sandwich from the warmer, and remove a pint of her homemade ice cream from the small freezer behind the counter. She slides everything forward to Seven with the drinks in a carrier, a smile on her face. “Here you go.”

“How much? You forgot to ring me up.”

Jaehee shakes her head.

“It’s on the house. Tell Saeran and Vanderwood that I said hello.”

“Will do,” Seven grins back and takes the items, ready to head home to his brother and former handler with the treats. “See ya later!”

Upon arriving home, Seven labels the medium iced mocha and the paper wrapper that covers the breakfast sandwich with Vanderwood’s name and a little note so he can put them in the fridge for the older man to have whenever he returns from whatever it is he’s out doing. Next, carries the pint of homemade vanilla bean ice cream and the large caramel frappe along with a spoon to Saeran’s bedroom door.

“Hey, little bro,” Seven knocks. “You holding up okay in there?”

“Don’t call me that… And I’m fine, leave me alone.”

“Saeran… I want you to be happy, but I can’t let you stay in that room forever. I’m starting to get worried about you,” Seven insists as if he isn’t already worried about Saeran when, honestly, he’s worried to death.

“I said to leave me alone!” Saeran yells back.

“Please, Saeran, it’s been days! When’s the last time you’ve eaten? Please, just talk to me… All I want to do is help…” Seven trails off, then sighs. A pit of sadness pools in the bottom of his stomach as tears fill his golden eyes. “Look, you don’t have to come all the way out, and you don’t have to let me in, but I brought you breakfast from Jaehee. I even got you your favorite coffee and something sweet so you’d eat. Just come open the door enough to grab it from me, you don’t have to do anything else. I promise.”

“And you’re not going to drag me out or try to force your way in?”

“Of course not,” Seven relents, as tempting as the idea is. “I want you to trust me.”

“Fine, give me a sec,” Seven hears some shuffling, which is followed by footsteps. The door opens and Saeran is on the other side, matching eyes bloodshot and tired, white and red hair matted, and skin pale. It looks like he’s lost a few pounds, but he’s alive, and he’s okay. Seven expects Saeran to snatch the ice cream and the coffee out of his hands, which does happen, but it’s not immediately followed by Saeran slamming the door shut. Instead, Saeran looks up at him as if he’s grown another head. “...You dyed your hair. Why? Why the fuck did you dye your hair?”

Saeran doesn’t look like he hates it, at least not immediately. He just appears curious. Seven smiles and starts to explain.

“I was getting sick of the red… Makes me look too much like Mom, y’know. It sucks hating what’s in the mirror just because of the past.”

“Okay, but why did you make it the same color as mine?” Saeran asks with narrowed eyes.

“It looked good on you- thought it’d look good on me, too,” Seven explains.

“It looks stupid. You should’ve gone pink or black or something… Would’ve suited you more.”

The words hurt more than they should. It’s just hair dye. Seven likes it, he’s liked it since he did it. But everyone else’s opinions matter to him more than they should, and his feelings are hurt, especially when Saeran slams the door shut in his face with not another word.

“...At this point, I’m not even surprised anymore,” Seven deadpans and turns to walk down the hallway and back to his own bedroom. “Oh well.”

“Seven,” Vanderwood greets lowly. He almost walks right past Seven, at least until he stops in his tracks and stares down at the younger man with a baffled expression. “What the hell is going on with your hair?”

“Don’t even ask, Vanderwood, I’m not in the mood.”

WIth that, Seven storms off to his bedroom, so frustrated with the reactions he’s gotten to his new hair that he decides he’ll just have to cut it all off.

~~~

That night, Jumin stays over. Seven supposes he didn’t think it through very well, but as soon as the older man fell asleep, he finds himself sneaking to the master bathroom. Leaving the door unlocked, he flicks on the lights, plugs in his electric razor, and grabs a pair of hair scissors from the drawer. He’ll have to cut off all the longer parts, then tackle what’s left with the razor. After that, he’ll wear a wig for a few weeks until it grows back red- the only color that looks good on him, apparently.

To his surprise, though, despite Jumin having an incredibly long work day, he wakes up and walks into the bathroom to lean back against the wall. Seven sees him, not because he turns around, but because the ravenette aligns perfectly with the mirror that Seven is currently using as visual aid while he holds the scissors up to the first strand he plans to cut off.

“Saeyoung,” Jumin starts, voice groggy. He’s dressed in his blue and white striped satin pajamas, fully finished with that silly pajama hat that Seven makes fun of every once in a blue moon. His dark eyes are full of sleep and his long arms are crossed over his narrow chest. “What exactly are you doing?”

“Cutting my hair.”

“Why? I thought you trimmed the ends when you dyed it last week.”

“I did.”

“Then why are you cutting it now?”

“Honestly, Jumin, I don’t want to talk about it,” Seven frowns. The thought of how everyone- Zen, Yoosung, Saeran, Vanderwood, and Jaehee- reacted to his new hairstyle, it bothers him. As used as he is to them teasing him for his weird personality and silly jokes, he doesn’t like it when his appearance is judged like this, even if they don’t mean to offend him. “Please just let me shave my hair off in peace.”

“...Saeyoung, put the scissors down for a moment and listen to me,” Jumin sighs, and Seven listens. He sets the hair scissors down on top of the bathroom counter and turns around to face his lover. “I don’t know what inner turmoil you’re going through, and I don’t know what you’re thinking right now. What I do know is you’re stressed, which is probably why you made such a big change in the first place… But I like it. I think you did an excellent job with your hair. Please, don’t cut it off just because everyone else is struggling to get used to it.”

“Jumin, everyone hates it! I’ve had multiple people tell me it looks weird or stupid since I did it, and I know they’re not wrong. At this point, I may as well just chop the shit off and start over.”

“That’s a terrible idea and you know it, because if you cut it off, tomorrow you’re going to be complaining that you’re bald,” Jumin points out, and it’s true. Even if he wears a wig for a while, he’ll hate the way he looks without it; he’s tried shaving his head a handful of times and it never looks proper because of his head shape. “It looks fine, you can’t blame everyone for struggling to adjust to it. After all, we’ve only ever seen you with bright red hair before this- minus the occasional wig. Give it a few more weeks. If you don’t like it after that, you can dye it back to what it was or dye it another color, or even shave your head if you so please. Just don’t go and make a rash decision about your appearance because things haven’t been going well lately.”

“...You’re right,” Seven admits and reaches out to unplug the electric razor. “But you should probably hide the scissors and the razor from me for at least a month. I may get tempted when you’re not here to stop me.”

“Fine. I can do that much after you fall asleep tonight.”

“Thanks.”

Seven moves to push past Jumin and go back to the bedroom to sleep with his sad, ugly white hair, only to get caught by the wrist. He looks over his shoulder and sees Jumin staring down at him with a small smile.

“Saeyoung, wait,” Jumin murmurs and leans down to press a kiss into his hair. Seven’s heart skips a beat at the gesture of affection. “I do mean what I said. You look beautiful. I love the white more than I thought I would when you told me about it over the phone.”

“Thanks, Jumin,”

“Hey, I have an idea,”

“And what would that be?”

“...Got any more of that bleach? Perhaps a makeover for me would distract the RFA from your new look.”

At that, Seven smiles and starts to dig through his bathroom cabinet for the last bottle of bleach.

[rfaromance]

"Is this necessary?"

"Yes."

"What kind of deluded birthday events do they have in America, anyway? What do cat ears represent on a birthday for a human? It makes no sense."

"Saeran! You can't assume you know better about it than Ariella, or me! We've both been there. She lived there and I spent plenty of time there to pick up the culture around a birthday party! Cat ears are almost the most important thing."

"Okay, well, then SHE should be wearing them since it's her birthday, not us."

"No, no. The point is that we're a part of a pack! The best family of lost cats that found each other! This makes more sense when you know the context for it and why it's so crucial you wear ears and meow the birthday song."

"I am only tolerating these ears, Saeyoung."

"Because you want your sister-in-law to smile on her happy day! That's so sweet!"

Saeran made a face of disdain. He hoped this would not happen again in a week when it was their stupid birthday again. He sighed and looked away from his brother, who was deep in the throes of adding some finishing touches to the room. Streamers and half a dozen paw prints littered the bunker. He said there was a puzzle of some sort that had to do with paws that Ariella was busy with.

Which, that was weird to Saeran but he really didn't know much about what Americans did. He didn't want to question it or learn more at this point since it seemed like it was a mess waiting to happen all at once. He knew enough for the time being.

Saeyoung was over the moon, though. He wanted to make this an exciting day for Ariella. That part wasn't bad. It was the whiskers he painted on and the ears that were the problem. He grumbled into his sweater, which was only bearable in the bunker since the weather outside was blistering again. He only wanted to do this to appease the poor woman.

They were... reluctant friends, after all.

If you could even call them friends. Ariella said they were but Saeran was still wary. She was too much... like a person that Saeran knew didn't deserve to be around. Still, her company wasn't all that bad. This just felt like a mess waiting to happen. It just wasn't how he would spend his own birthday. He wouldn't spend his birthday doing anything anyway. It wasn't particularly a day he enjoyed.

But, he supposed Ariella deserved to have a good day. That was the only reason he looked ridiculous.

"Saeyoung Choi, you know I love puzzles as much as the next person alive but if you're going to make Blue's Clues, you need to put the paw print where I can reach it! I made Zen climb a flag pole to get me the last clue!" was the call of Ariella's voice from the garage.

Saeyoung knew how to use his time wisely... even if he was a moron. Saeran thought. Saeyoung laughed at her grumbles, though. He did those things to see how long it would take her to find everything. Those footsteps that came down the hall were familiar for him. She was coming in with the intent to find out what her prize was. She loved his dumb puzzles to death.

Saeyoung was beaming ear to ear when she came inside. It didn't take Ariella long before she noticed the prints across the floor and the solitary one on the back of his shirt. If only because she saw it just as she rounded the corner to interrogate him and realized her party was set up for her to celebrate.

"My last clue, huh? Let me guess, it's the handsome little kitty who asked all his friends to set up a party for me. He worked his biscuit making paws down to the bone to make it happen," she murmured.

"It's your favorite kitty," Saeyoung corrected her as he spun around to face her properly. "Plus, I got the rest of your warrior clan dressed up for you! Just... not Zen. He's a mysterious dog that decided he had no choice but to protect the kittens."

"You dork," she flung her arms around his neck. "I love you."

"Happy birthday, starlight."

Saeran grumbled. "Would you two stop trying to suck faces when everyone is here? I was promised ice cream cake for this. The birthday girl owes me a slice for looking this ridiculous."

"Aw, you look adorable, Saeran. Thank you for your birthday wishes! But, I get the first slice of cake. It's the rule."

Ariella gets the first slice, but Saeran gets the biggest.

[anas-tasiaa]

ALWAYS BE

Saeyoung choi/Saeran choi

Saeran had been struggling with his mental health for weeks. He felt like he was drowning in his own thoughts, unable to escape the endless cycle of pain and anxiety that seemed to consume him.

Saeyoung knew that something was wrong, but he didn't know how to help his brother. He felt helpless, watching as Saeran withdrew further into himself, closing off from the world and pushing everyone away.

One day, Saeyoung found Saeran sitting alone in the dark, his head in his hands. He could see the pain etched on his brother's face, the tears streaming down his cheeks.

"Saeran-ah, what's wrong?" Saeyoung asked, as he sat down beside him.

Saeran didn't answer, but Saeyoung could see the turmoil in his eyes. He put his arm around his brother's shoulder, gently and held him close, feeling the weight of his pain and suffering.

"I'm here for you, Saeran-ah," Saeyoung whispered, as he stroked his brother's hair. "You don't have to go through this alone."

Saeran leaned into his brother's embrace, feeling the safety and comfort that only Saeyoung could provide. He let out a shuddering breath, feeling the tension in his body start to ease.

"I don't know what's wrong with me," Saeran whispered, his voice barely audible.

"It's okay," Saeyoung replied, his voice soft and gentle. "You don't have to have all the answers right now. Just know that I'm here for you, and I'll always be here for you, no matter what."

Saeran felt a sense of relief wash over him, knowing that he didn't have to face his struggles alone. He clung to his brother tightly, feeling the love and support that Saeyoung always offered him.

Together, they sat in the dark, holding onto each other, sharing the burden of pain and suffering. But somehow, with Saeyoung by his side, Saeran felt like he could face anything.