#sadly he have a habit of breaking any he gets his hands on

[sofa-king-lame]

48. Out of habit - Buddie

Oop this one got away from me a little. But here it is!

—

Four months after Christopher left for Texas, Eddie kissed Buck at a farmers market over the potatoes. It had surprised Buck so much he forgot what it was they even went to the farmers market for in the first place (Eddie had tagged along for the hell of it, just wanting to be around Buck). The sun was shining behind him, catching the natural highlights in his curls and when Buck had lifted up his sunglasses to inspect the purple sweet potatoes a little closer Eddie lost any sense of self control he had. Buck’s eyes crinkling against the bright light of the rising sun had been too much for Eddie to tamp down on, so he’d said ‘fuck it’ to himself and grabbed the collar of Buck’s shirt to pull him in and kiss him absolutely senseless.

“Wanna get out of here?” Eddie breathed heavily when they parted. Buck had nodded fervently and followed Eddie wordlessly back to the Jeep. They made it almost all the way back to Eddie’s house holding hands over the centre console before Buck realised they’d left empty handed. Neither of them cared much when they kissed again at the front door, against the front door on the inside, in the hallway, the doorway to Eddie’s bedroom, then finally the bed.

They did go back the next morning and manage to actually get what they went for without traumatising any vendors.

Buck essentially moved in after that and they spent the next month (somewhat guiltily) enjoying having an empty house. Buck seemed to make it his mission to see exactly how loud he could make Eddie be, which is pretty damn loud as it turns out. Mrs. Parnell from next door refused to look Eddie in the eye the morning after a particularly excellent evening (it’s not Eddie’s fault it had been unseasonably warm so they’d had the windows open, and it’s also not Eddie’s fault he never knew sex could feel like that).

—

Buck gets up before Eddie every morning they’re at home together and is always waiting in the kitchen with coffee, breakfast, and a delightfully soft good morning kiss. They exist in a hazy bubble where the only thing that matters is them.

—

Eddie

Christopher messages Eddie and says he wants to come home five weeks after Buck and Eddie get together. They both cry a little over it, then Eddie spends two hours arguing with his parents on the phone about it.

“We just don’t think he’s ready,” Helena sighs.

“If he says he’s ready, then he’s ready,” Eddie groans. The only reason he’s not banging his head on the table in frustration right now is because Buck is next to him with a secure arm around his waist.

“But how can we be sure we’re returning him to a safe environment? How can we trust something like this won’t happen again?” Ramon asks. Eddie wants to break something, maybe hit someone. He chooses to grab Buck’s free hand and squeeze it instead. Buck returns his grip just as fiercely and presses a gentle kiss to Eddie’s temple (Eddie is incredibly grateful they’re not on a video call, he doesn’t think he could handle this alone).

“Maybe we should bring him and stay for a few days,” Helena suggests. The absolute last thing Eddie wants is for his parents to stay in his house for a few days, but if it means getting Christopher back without needing to seek legal advice he’ll do it.

“Fine,” Eddie replies through gritted teeth. “You can stay for three days.”

“Oh, I was thinking maybe a week -“

“This is my house,” Eddie reminds them, “and Christopher is my son. Three days.”

“Three days is fine,” Ramon concedes. Eddie hears his mother sigh unhappily, a sound he is all too familiar with (a constant presence in his childhood).

“We’ll be up this weekend,” Helena tells him before promptly hanging up the call. Buck is quiet beside him, still firmly gripping his hand.

“I have to go back to the loft, don’t I,” he says sadly, as Eddie drops his phone to the coffee table in front of him. It clatters louder than he thought it would but he barely registers it over the blood rushing in his ears.

“I don’t want you to,” Eddie murmurs, but he knows it has to be this way. His parents are already going to be questioning everything, and having Buck around all the time would probably only raise concerns ‘are you telling us you’re incapable of looking after Christopher yourself, Edmundo? Why is your coworker always here?’

“It’s okay,” Buck assures him. “This weekend is about getting Chris back, so that’s what you’re going to do. I’ll be here if and when you need me.”

“I’m not ashamed. I’m going to tell them,” Eddie insists, because the past month he hadn’t felt anything other than pure joy and contentment. He wants to scream from rooftops ‘I got Buck!’

“I know,” Buck smiles. “When the time is right. You got this, okay? Let’s get you your kid back.”

—

Buck

Buck ends up having to work the day Eddie’s parents arrive, but manages to at least be there when they turn up. The reunion between Eddie and Christopher is tearful and happy, and Buck sheds a few tears of his own when Christopher gives him a brief but tight hug.

“Missed you so much,” Buck murmurs as he hugs back.

“I missed you too,” Christopher mumbles as he steps back. Helena and Ramon are watching closely, meaning Buck is hyper-aware of his proximity to Eddie. Having spent the last month only stepping out of each other’s space to use the toilet and work, it’s borderline excruciating not being able to give Eddie’s hand a reassuring squeeze or place a grounding kiss on his forehead. Eddie meets his gaze over Christopher’s head and flashes him a tight smile, before grabbing his parents’ bags and hauling them inside.

“So, Evan,” Helena starts and Buck barely manages not to visibly flinch. He doesn’t think he’s ever referred to himself as Evan around Eddie’s parents, and he’s almost certain that if Christopher had been talking about him he would have called him Buck.

“It’s Buck,” Christopher and Eddie correct her at the same time. Buck notices the tension in Eddie’s shoulders ease a little at that, smiling at Christopher who ducks his head to hide his own grin.

“Right, of course. Buck,” Helena says dismissively. “Do you think Eddie is ready to have Christopher home?”

“I, uh. I don’t think that’s my call to make. That’s entirely up to Eddie and Christopher, isn’t it?” Buck coughs awkwardly. “My opinion doesn’t matter.”

“It does,” Eddie interjects, sending Buck a pleading look.

“Okay. Then yes. I think Eddie has been ready for Christopher to come home from the moment he walked out the door,” Buck tells Helena bluntly. He won’t tell her what he really thinks, because he knows Eddie is trying to salvage his relationship with them for Christopher’s sake (even if Buck thinks they don’t deserve it).

“Maybe we should speak to your boss, Eddie. And you said you’re seeing a therapist, could we speak to them too?” Helena continues and this time Buck does visibly flinch. Eddie’s jaw tightens and Buck watches as he takes three deep breaths in a row before responding.

“No,” Eddie says simply. “We won’t be doing that. You can stay for the three days we planned if that’s what Christopher wants to feel more comfortable, but this visit isn’t about you assessing my capacity to parent my child.”

“Eddie we just want to be sure he’s safe,” Ramon insists.

“Christopher is safer here with Eddie than he is anywhere else,” Buck huffs. “I wouldn’t say that if I didn’t think it was true.”

“You work together, you don’t have an unbiased opinion on the matter,” Helena scoffs, crossing her arms over her chest. Buck hates her.

“Eddie is my best friend, so you’re right. My opinion isn’t unbiased. But Christopher is equally important to me, and I wouldn’t tell you he was safe here if I thought he wouldn’t be,” Buck snaps. Buck is now already running late for work, and although he desperately wants to stay and support Eddie he has to leave.

“Buck, it’s alright,” Eddie says softly, crossing the room to stand with him. “We’re gonna talk. You are late for work.”

“Yeah,” Buck mutters. “I’ll check in with you later, okay?”

“Okay,” Eddie murmurs. It takes every ounce of Buck’s self control not to kiss Eddie goodbye, not to use his fingers to hook under Eddie’s chin and tilt his head up to rest their foreheads together, not to massage the tightness out of his shoulders. He settles on a quick clap on the shoulder as he heads out the door.

—

After his shift Buck heads home to dump his things and change into his running gear - it’s early enough in the morning that turning up at Eddie’s would raise too many questions, so instead he runs to their favourite cafe to get enough coffees and breakfast for everyone before turning up at a more normal time. Helena is out the front of the house as he walks up the driveway and observes him quizzically.

“Good morning!” Buck greets cheerfully. “I was out for a run and thought I’d swing by with coffee and breakfast.”

“That’s…very nice of you,” Helena says slowly. “Do you do things like this often?”

“All the time,” Buck responds after carefully considering his answer. “Eddie and Chris are both incredibly important to me, and I like to do nice things for them.”

“Hmm,” Helena hums. Buck chooses to ignore her as he precariously balances the bag of breakfast wraps on top of the coffee tray to open the door, toeing off his shoes before padding through to the kitchen. Ramon is at the table and shoots him a confused look as the starts to pull plates out of the cupboard.

“I wasn’t sure how the two of you take your coffee, but w- Eddie has cream and sugar,” Buck chatters, hoping they don’t notice him almost slipping up and saying “we have cream and sugar”. Because they’d bought both together a week ago, barely able to keep their hands off each other in the grocery store. Eddie’s parents arrived less than twenty-four hours ago and Buck is already very ready for them to fuck off back to El Paso. Knowing Eddie is in his their bed down the hall and he can’t climb in with him, even just to curl around him and nap for a few hours, is killing him. Buck suspects Eddie has been living in his very own special circle of hell over the last eighteen hours though, and he doesn’t want to make things worse. So he tosses two of the wraps into Eddie’s sandwich press to toast them, retrieves the cream and sugar for the coffees, and waits patiently for Eddie to get up. Helena joins Ramon at the table and they begin to whisper between themselves, Buck pointedly not eavesdropping (because he’s too tired to bite his tongue over whatever shit they’re probably saying about him or Eddie). He can hear Eddie coming down the hallway now anyway.

—

Eddie

Eddie blinks awake earlier than he has been on his days off over the last month, swinging his legs over the side of the bed and standing up still half-asleep. He can hear Buck puttering around and makes his way down the hall and into the kitchen. Buck is watching the sandwich press and Eddie can smell their favourite breakfast wraps toasting away.

“Morning,” he murmurs, sliding into the almost non-existent gap between Buck and the bench. He kisses him softly, the way he’s done most mornings for the past month. Buck, however, stiffens underneath him and a loud gasp sounds from the general direction of the table.

“Uh - you, um -“ Buck stutters as Eddie suddenly remembers that his fucking parents are here. At his kitchen table. Deciding whether or not they’re willing to give him his son back.

“Fuck,” Eddie hisses. He steps away from Buck to find his parents staring at him, his mothers mouth hanging open. His father has gone bright red and his fists are clenched on top of the table.

“What was that?” Helena demands. “What on earth is happening here?”

“I was saying good morning to my boyfriend,” Eddie tells her, because fuck it. He’s proud to be with Buck, and he wants everyone in his life to know how fucking happy he is. “I forgot you were here.”

“Boyfriend?” Ramon sputters. “Boyfriend, Edmundo!”

“Yes, Dad. Boyfriend. If you’ve got a problem with it, you know where the door is,” Eddie responds coolly. Buck’s brushing his hand against Eddie’s, the way he does when he wants to hold hands but is letting Eddie take the lead. Eddie grabs his hand firmly and brings it up to his mouth, pressing a firm kiss to Buck’s knuckles.

“Christopher is coming with if you make us leave,” Helena warns.

“No I’m not,” comes Christopher’s voice from the doorway. “I’m staying here.”

“But -“

“No, no but. Chris wants to stay,” Eddie asserts, feeling braver than he ever has in front of his parents with Buck by his side.

“But Christopher, what about all those teachings from the church you enjoyed?” Ramon asks him. Helena has started crying, clinging to Eddie’s father and hiding her face.

“I hated church. You forced me to go, I never wanted to,” Christopher mutters. “It’s all bullshit anyway. Dad told me about him and Buck last night, and I want to move home.”

“Language, Christopher,” Helena admonishes harshly, and this is Eddie’s breaking point.

“Get out,” he snaps. “Christopher is not your child. He’s my child, and this is my home. He can swear if he fucking wants to.”

“This is not how we raised you, Edmundo,” Helena wails. Ramon is stony and silent, jaw set tight and staring at the wall behind Eddie’s head.

“I am grateful every day that I’m not the person you tried to raise me to be,” Eddie scoffs. Buck’s grip on his hand tightens and he leans closer, bumping their shoulders together.

“Eddie is the best person I know,” Buck interjects, voice wobbly. “Despite the two of you.”

“Who do you think you are, speaking to us like that?” Ramon finally snaps.

“He’s the one who’s been here for me all the times you should have been,” Eddie retorts. “Now get out of my house.”

“Christopher,” Helena pleads, but he ignores her in favour of crossing the kitchen to join Buck and Eddie.

“You should go,” Christopher mumbles. “I’m staying.”

“We’ll be in touch soon,” Ramon mutters as they fucking finally walk out of the kitchen. Eddie follows them to make sure they get their bags, watching until their hire car is no longer visible. It’s only then that he drops his shoulders, rolling them to relieve the tension that had rooted itself there the minute his parents pulled into his driveway.

When he returns to the kitchen he finds Buck hugging Christopher, his eyes red and watery.

“So proud of you, buddy,” Buck murmurs, giving Christopher one last squeeze before letting him go.

“That was really brave,” Eddie adds. “I was never brave enough to stand up to them when I was your age.”

“Whatever,” Christopher sighs, shrugging his shoulders. His pink cheeks betray the facade he’s putting on, as does the smile that breaks out across his face as Buck presents him with his breakfast wrap and hot chocolate. “Thanks, Buck.”

“Missed you, kiddo,” Buck says, but he’s looking at Eddie and grinning.

“Missed you too,” Christopher replies around a mouthful of egg and sausage. “Missed you, Dad.”

“I missed you so much, Chris,” Eddie tells him softly, sitting next to him at the table. “We’ve got a lot to talk about, but I just wanted to make sure you’re okay. Y’know, with me and Buck.”

“Are you going to leave if you guys break up?” Christopher asks bluntly, looking at Buck.

“Never,” Buck insists. “I’m here for good.”

“Then it’s fine,” Christopher shrugs. “Just don’t be gross in front of me.”

“Deal,” Eddie chuckles. Buck gestures subtly to the living room and Eddie stands to follow him out, pulling him in for a kiss as soon as they’re around the corner. It’s a hell of a lot more chaste than most other kisses they’ve had in the last month, but Eddie bathes in its warmth anyway.

“You good?” Eddie asks, because he wasn’t the only one in the line of fire this morning. Buck had walked right into it for Eddie, defending him like it’s what he was born to do.

“I’m good. Are you good?” Buck replies, resting a hand on Eddie’s cheek.

“I’m great,” Eddie grins. “I’ve got my family back together.”

“You were amazing. I can’t believe you finally stood up to them like that,” Buck breathes. Eddie snorts because he doesn’t really feel brave - he feels like he lost his cool, but man did it feel good.

“Thank you for backing me up,” Eddie murmurs, pressing his forehead against Buck’s.

“We promised to have each other’s backs years ago. I’m not ever breaking that promise,” Buck whispers as he kisses Eddie again.

“I can hear you being gross,” Christopher calls out from the kitchen. Buck laughs and gives Eddie a peck on the lips before heading back into the kitchen.

“The deal was not to be gross in front of you!” Eddie argues, following Buck and sitting back down.

“Being able to hear it counts as in front of me,” Christopher counters with a huff.

“Fine,” Buck sighs, setting his and Eddie’s breakfast and coffees down on the table. “We’ll just be gross when you’re not looking or listening.”

“Yeah, you’re a teenager now. Not looking or listening is all part of the process of growing up,” Eddie teases. Christopher groans but doesn’t leave the table, and Eddie thinks he might be biting back another smile.

“We love you,” Buck tells Christopher, who was definitely biting back a smile (that’s now being hidden behind his cup of hot chocolate).

“Love you too,” he mumbles. Yeah, Eddie is good. Probably the best he’s ever been.

[babyleostuff]

─ PINK RIBBONS

𝜗𝜚 THEME: fluff, domesticity, you being jeonghan's whole world (mention of the military) 𝜗𝜚 PAIRING: idol!jeonghan x fem!reader 𝜗𝜚 WORD COUNT: 792

natalia's note: idc if this is too dramatic, i don't want jeonghan to go

⦗💌 ⦘your favourite past time? playing with your boyfriend's hair, duh. sadly, it's the last time you get to do it for the next two years.

“here,” jeonghan drops a bunch of… somethings in your lap and sits down on the fluffy rug you bought last month, his back facing you. 

your boyfriend’s randomness is nothing new; even before you began dating, you quickly found out that yoon jeonghan was an unpredictable man. but no matter how much time has passed since you agreed to be his girlfriend, you are still taken aback each and every time he decides to do something out of the blue in his jeonghan fashion. 

you quickly grew to love his randomness, though. it’s like being surprised in the best ways possible.

“what,” you pick up a packet of colourful hair ties and hair pins, “what do you want me to do with those?”.  

jeonghan turns around and looks up to meet your eyes, his own holding nothing but fondness and warmth. “my hair,” he says and shakes his head of messy brown hair he died a couple of days ago. “we haven’t done this in a while, so i thought it’d be nice.” 

your stomach churned. how many times have you sat like this - you on the edge of the sofa and jeonghan in front of you, resting comfortably against a cushion you placed so as not to strain his back. a drama or a cooking show would be playing quietly in the background, neither of you watching it, too busy with basking in the domesticity. 

looking back, it was a no-brainer that you got addicted to your boyfriend’s hair so quickly. playing with it became a little habit of yours - before bed, in the morning, at a game night with the boys, during parties - whenever jeonghan was in your arm’s reach, you’d play with his hair, no matter if they were short or long (though you always mourned his long hair whenever he cut them). it always managed to calm you down and ground you when life got a bit too much. 

you’ve never experienced deja vu before, but if this was how it felt then you’d rather be hit with a sledge hammer. it’d hurt less. 

and now… despite that you could feel your heart breaking, you couldn’t tell him no. it’s probably the last time you’ll be able to do this before the enlistment anyway, so maybe… maybe it’ll be a nice way to celebrate his last days at home? 

“it’s hair. it’s just hair,” your mind seems to scream into the void as you grab a couple of the purple-ish hair bands and slide them on your wrist. but your heart is even louder and it feels like you’re being ripped apart. 

were you being dramatic? definitely. did you care? not at all. your whole life would change in the next day or so and despite preparing for this for such a long time now, it didn’t make it any less painful. with jeonghan leaving you’d be losing a part of yourself.

“hey,” he raises his hand and grabs your chin, “get that scowl off your face.”

“i know,” you sigh. “it’s just that-,”.

“i don’t want to hear any of that. we’re having fun tonight, honey,” jeonghan says and runs his thumb over your cheek. affection and pure love, which are always there whenever he looks at you (coups makes sure to point that out on every possible occasion), seemed to slow your racing heartbeat, because the longer you stared into his brown, gentle eyes the more your mind seemed to quiet down. oh, how you are going to miss that lovesick stare. “no more sad faces, yeah?” 

you swallow and nod, your heart heavy from all the emotions. the pink ribbons and blue pins look like the opposite of what you are feeling, but… you have to be strong. if not for yourself, then for jeonghan. 

“any specific requests?” you ask and comb your fingers gently through his silky hair.

“nope. whatever you do,” he says and turns his back to you, “it’ll look perfect.” you couldn't see jeonghan’s face, but you could hear the smile in his voice. 

placing a peck on your exposed leg, he makes himself comfortable against the cushions and lets out his grandpa-esque sigh. 

what the next days are going to bring - you aren’t sure. you don’t even want to think about it. but for now… for now, you are as content as you can be. enveloped by your love’s affection like a security blanket, his warm hands sliding up and down your calves, as if reminding you that he’s still there, it is enough for you. enough to swallow your tears and put a brave smile on your face for the man sitting in front of you. 

for now it is only you and him and all the pink ribbons.

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[alchemistc]

Part One

The loft is sadly undecorated. He'd tried, is the thing. Gone to the same novelty store they'd found on a random walk after a date, in late September, where Tommy had spent twenty minutes worrying a foam pumpkin in his hands while Buck tried to decide what sort of decor would fit his utilitarian loft.

They'd spent so long lingering over the sculpted white candles, Buck thrilled because Tommy's straight face broke every time Buck pointed out which ones looked like incredibly expensive dildos, that he'd felt bad enough to buy a whole set of them just to appease the girl at the counter who'd been watching them with a half annoyed, half wistful expression while Buck made a comment about dragons that had had Tommy biting his lip so hard he'd actually gone red in the face trying to hold the laughter in.

But every time he'd picked up a glass tree and thought how much fun it'd be to try to make Tommy go full Tik Tok Paramedic on him, every time he'd found something soft or plush enough that Tommy wouldn't have been able to resist running his fingers over it, plucking it up to toss it between his palms - well.

It wasn't like there'd be anyone in his loft long enough to really appreciate his decorations.

"Why'd you kiss me?" he asks, rounding on Tommy as Tommy takes a tentative step towards the kitchen.

"You were being annoying." At Buck's look, he elaborates. "Force of habit."

The finger comes up without any input from Buck, his voice tipping into that same flirty, bickering rapport he'd always pushed as far as he could. "I knew you did it to shut me up."

Tommy expression shutters. He recognizes Buck's tone. A few months ago that tone would start with a round of banter that usually ended with at least one of them with their pants around their ankles.

He looks spooked. He's staring at the island stool closest to the door like he's replaying the last conversation they had here, and Buck feels all his ire rear back up.

"You promised me clarity, Tommy." It's an accusation, and they both know it, because he looks ready to fucking bolt.

Slowly, he steps in. Half a yard closer to Buck, close enough to curl his hand over the island, and Buck is struck again by how goddamn unfair it is that Tommy looks this goddamn good in a suit.

"I did."

Buck's pretty sure he has some muffins he hasn't frozen yet that wouldn't actually damage Tommy, if he threw them at him.

"Can we...?" He gestures, vague as his half a question, and Buck wants to throttle him. Or kiss him again, which is -

"I need a beer. You?"

Tommy sighs. His grip on the corner of the island makes his knuckles go white. "Evan."

"No beer, got it." He swings the door open and doesn't wait for the reaction to either his snippy little rejoinder or the stacks and stacks of baked goods filling up the shelves of his fridge. He pops the cap with his back still turned, let's the fridge door fall closed. "Not like you drove here, but sure. One of us should be sober, I guess."

The switch back to Evan doesn't do anything for him at all.

Buck leans back against the counter and tries not to think about how he'd had this half formed idea of getting a real tree this year, finding some novelty kiosk that made those hokey ornaments for people to mark the years they'd been a family. He'd thought -

Tommy blinks guiltily when Buck catches him eyeing the way he fills out his slacks, a toe to groin drift of his gaze that makes Buck ache for when he could respond to that by dropping to his knees.

"That's a lot of bread," Tommy notes, eyes focused somewhere over Buck's shoulder.

"Why'd you break up with me, Tommy?"

Tommy freezes. Shifts from foot to foot. Sighs, and takes a few steps to the fridge, swings it open to grab a beer of his own. It's still the stuff Tommy likes. Buck's not picky, really, and it'd been habit to grab the six pack he always kept for Tommy.

The last five times he'd restocked.

Tommy takes half a step back to lean against the island, just off center from Buck, so they both have to twist their necks just a little to actually look at each other.

"You terrify me," Tommy murmurs, a few swigs in, when the silence is just starting to make Buck's skin itch. "Evan, I'm not -." He grimaces, frustrated. "I'm not some Super Gay who fights for justice and equality and the ability to make horrible television with Hummel doll sopranists."

"I don't know what that means."

Tommy's smile is wry. He'd had a running list of movies Buck's never seen on a note on his phone - every time Buck missed a reference, he'd added it to the list. They'd gotten through maybe twenty before -

"I led on a good woman for years because I convinced myself I could live my life ignoring a huge piece of myself. I hurled slurs with my buddies just to make sure no one noticed me. I fed into every toxic stereotype I could just to avoid anyone realizing I wasn't one of them. I'm not - I'm not some Gold Star Gay, paragon of the community. I didn't do shit. And even when I made the decision to let myself just be who I always was, I waited until no one in my life was close enough to me to question that I hadn't always been this way. I -." He winces. Shakes his head. "I run instead of fighting. I hide every time someone tries to see me. I'm not - this comfort you're so convinced I have I took at the cost of other people who were braver and stronger than I could ever be. Do you - is that an admirable quality, to you?"

Buck wishes they'd sat, like Tommy seemed to have been hinting at. He wishes he'd spent the ride over preparing himself for this, instead of stopping himself from crawling into Tommy's lap and getting a horrible rider rating for his trouble. He wishes -

"Do you think I don't already know all those things about you?"

It's - actually, it makes him a little furious, to think that Tommy spent six months thinking he'd successfully hid all those things from Buck. And - sure, he hadn't exactly been forthcoming about more than a few of those things, but like -

It wasn't like Buck didn't actively find ways to pry stories from Howie and Hen, even Bobby on occasion. It wasn't like Buck hadn't noticed the clipped way Tommy spoke of his past, his family, always tucking away more than he revealed. It wasn't like Buck wasn't well aware that Tommy Kinard had the capacity to be a total fucking asshole, if he wanted. Just because he'd kept it cool around Buck, made it just flirty enough for plausible deniability -

"You deserve better than that. Than me."

"Then be better than that, Tommy." It's not the best way to get his point across, but... "I've had multiple serious relationships, Tommy. I'm - I've been in love, before, and I've had my heart broken before, and I've had my trust broken before, and I've made people I love feel like shit. You weren't new and exciting, Tommy, we were - we were boring and domestic and it was the best six months of my life. It was what I -."

And this, of course, is where the words start to crest over, too many at once while his mouth tries to keep up and his throat is too tight to -

He swallows. Stares at his toes until his vision swims. Maybe those are tears, or maybe he's just stared long enough to go cross-eyed. His throat feels like he might be able to scrape a few words out

"I go too fast sometimes. I - I get scared I'm falling behind and so I clear a few hurdles too fast to catch back up and it -." Frustration rises through him as he remembers the way Tommy had levered himself up, spun away, broken things off without even a hint of the careful consideration Buck had grown so used to. "And you just - you tell me you want more than anything to be my last but you can't even give me the closure of a clean break! What the hell was that about?"

"Evan, I -."

"No! Okay, no. It's my turn to - it's my turn to be mad. It's my turn to - do you know how lonely I've been? How - how much I'm in my own head about where I went wrong, and what I could have done differently, and why you won't just fucking text me when you clearly want to? Do you know - do you know what it's like to think you've finally found something worth the humiliation of being known and then have it vanish in a single night? Over - you never talked to me about any of the shit you brought up that night, Tommy! You never - if you were so scared of not being enough to keep me interested, or so sure you weren't a good enough man, or so sure I couldn't possibly know what I wanted out of this, you could have saved us a hell of a lot of time and - and hurt by not being exactly the person I thought I could spend the rest of my life with! If that was all a - a smokescreen, some act, then why did you - are you actually so cruel that you convinced me we were falling in love while you had one foot out the door the whole time?"

Tommy's grip on the bottle looks painful.

"It's your turn to talk," Buck snipes, and he takes a little satisfaction in the way Tommy blanches. Just a little. Just enough to ignore how much he wants to rip Tommy's suit jacket at the straining shoulder seams and bite a bruise into that spot below his collarbone that even Tommy's undershirts hid well enough to keep the team at Harbor from putting him on blast for coming to work covered in hickeys.

"Six months with you was more devastating than two decades of hiding who I was, Evan," Tommy says, and it's a horrible opening that makes Buck feel like he's being drawn and quartered but he'd given Tommy the floor, so -

Tommy's eyes are a little too misty to call them anything but welling, and Buck hates it as much as it satisfies the pieces of himself he's spent weeks trying to pick up and glue back together.

"Evan, I lived with Abby for years and I don't think I saw her as much as I saw you. You -." He swipes a hand through his hair, and rustles one of his Superman curls loose to drape tauntingly over his forehead. Buck wants to bite him. He wants it to hurt. "You burrowed in and you just kept digging and I didn't take a second to question it until it was too late."

"Too late for what?"

"For me to take the cowards way out and leave before it hurt."

"Maybe I should have dug further," Buck snaps, and Tommy's gaze flits to his. Holds, for the first time all night. He's breathtaking in the best and worst way possible. He's spent weeks now trying to imagine anyone else ever making him feel the way prolonged eye contact with this man makes him feel.

"You did," Tommy admits, a confession that sounds like it's been gut punched right out of him. "You still -." Another grimace, Tommy pulling back, pulling away, hiding, running, and Buck can't -

"So what is this, Tommy? Is this - are you -?" He shakes his head to clear the cobwebs. Rears up, pushes off the counter, and Tommy's eyes widen like he's just now realized he doesn't have an easy exit. Buck just stands there, though. "If this is it, let this be it. If you don't want - if you're not willing to fight for this with me, tell me now. I know I'm - I know I'm a lot. I know I push for more when I'm scared. I know I'm overwhelming, and I sometimes can't stop talking to save my life, and I know I'm jealous and petty and - I know I'm not perfect."

Tommy sets his bottle on the counter beside him. Worries his lip between his teeth and rolls his jaw.

"You snore. You're a bitch sometimes and every once in a while it's not even charming. You hog all the covers and then you complain that it's too hot. You're vague about every single thing in your past that you think makes you seem like a bad person. You always think food needs more garlic and sometimes you're wrong. Sometimes when I spiral you just give me that stupid indulgent smile of yours and I know you stopped listening two reddit threads ago. When you're grumpy sometimes it takes everything in me not to pick a fight because you're such an asshole. You get cagey every time I pick at a thread you don't want to unravel and I - I hate it. I wanted a life with you and you couldn't stick around long enough to tell me why you were too afraid to go for it. So if - if you think I'm seeing you with rose colored glasses, or whatever. If you think I'm not - if you think being the first guy makes you too special for this to be real then just..." He sucks in a breath. Blows it out through his nose and feels the ache in his chest that's half remnants of his earlier panic attack and half fear that Tommy will actually turn and walk out at the end of this. "If you don't wanna fight for this I'll fill in the hole I dug as best I can and I'll leave you alone, okay?"

The look on Tommy's face is one he's never seen before. They've done this dance, or parts of it, at least. Tommy'd left him outside Micelli's, breathless and confused and aching, before he ever knew what it was like to hold his hand, to press his nose into the join of his neck and shoulder, to curl a hand in his hair or be filled by him - with attention, with affection, with the weight of his body and the stretch of his cock. Even then, this had felt different. Real, in a way the misty edges of his time with Abby, or the way Buck's puzzle pieces had never quite fit with Taylor's had never been. Even then, he'd just wanted so desperately to know and be known by Tommy that he'd taken his second chance and run with it.

"I don't snore," Tommy says, when the silence gets too heavy, and Buck - god, Buck has missed that tone, the snappy little tilt of his head, the blatant lie that passes over Tommy's lips so smoothly it's hard to tell sometimes that he's not being serious.

"I have audio proof," Buck says, and then doesn't immediately admit that he'd played it on a loop two nights into the breakup when he'd wrapped his entire body around the spare pillows on his bed and still hadn't been able to sleep alone in his bed.

"It bugs me that you spent days following scraps of information about a dead outlaw you convinced yourself cursed you, but you didn't even know what a Kinsey scale was."

This is - progress. This is... not Tommy bolting.

"I'm a two. If that's - is that, like, gay enough for you, or...?"

"You go too fast for me, Buckley," he says, and Buck knows that's a fucking reference to something he doesn't have context for just as well as he knows he's willing to spend the next decade waiting for the reference to pop up on Tommy's list. It's a terrifying, exhilarating thought and it's probably exactly what Tommy means.

"I can slow down," Buck says, and he tries to mean it. Nothing about how he feels about Tommy is slow.

"I don't want you to," Tommy admits, and then lets the silence stretch. They're two and a half feet away from each other and the distance feels like the farthest he's ever been from Tommy and the closest he may ever be again. "Living together, making a life together..." He swallows. "Marriage." That stops him short just long enough to recall how he'd blazed right past the I love you and straight into how he could keep Tommy. "You scare the shit out of me every goddamn minute of every goddamn day and I've never missed being terrified as much as I have since I walked out that door."

"I'm in love with you," Buck tells him, and Tommy blinks back tears. Takes a shaky breath and nods.

"That's what scares me. It's never - it's never been enough, before."

He'd sort of expected this to end with either the echo of his KitchenAid or a frantic rush up the stairs, but when Tommy meets him halfway all he does is sink his nose into the curls behind Buck's ear and breathe.

His arms drag Buck closer, his feet shuffle beneath them, his chin hooks over Buck's shoulder and he breathes, and breathes, and breathes.

---

"Your morning breath is rancid," Tommy tells him, palm centered on Buck's nose when he leans in for a kiss, pads of his fingers curled just slightly so that his hand is nearly encasing Buck's entire face. He wants to be annoyed but it's mind numbingly hot and Buck has missed it. Missed the snark, and the comfortable way Tommy will shoot him down when his head is in the clouds, and exactly how fucking large Tommy is.

"I'm so tired of avocado toast," Buck bats back, and Tommy is distracted enough by his need to make a face at that for Buck to swoop in and press a kiss to his cheek. He makes sure to make it a little wet just to watch Tommy's face crinkle in mock disgust.

He's in one of Buck's hoodies, is wearing the pair of his own sweats Buck had buried in the back of his closet in a fit of pique three days post breakup. He still looks properly debauched and Buck wants to drag him right back to bed.

Except -

"You don't have to go," Buck repeats, for the fifth time since he brought it up somewhere between peeling Tommy out of his suit pants and rolling out of bed to warm a hand towel under the sink so that Tommy could clean the cum off his abs. "But I need to shower and leave in like - twenty-seven minutes."

Tommy catches him by the waist and drags him in. "I won't be able to stay. You baked and I took as much holiday overtime as I could, but if you seriously want me there -."

"I seriously want you everywhere."

Tommy raises a brow.

"I mean that in a horny way and a codependent way."

Tommy snorts. "Good to know we're approaching this in a healthy manner."

"You told me not to slow down," Buck reminds him, and he gets a smack to his ass for his trouble.

"When Maddie pulls me aside, do you think she'll just slip me a poisoned glass of wine, or is she gonna get up on a step stool and make me stand there while she strangles me to death?"

"She won't do that." Buck leans in again, rolls a loose curl between two fingers. "She'll just stab you in the middle of the kitchen and warn my parents not to step in the blood."

"That's comforting."

Tommy takes a utilitarian shower in the downstairs bathroom and doesn't let Buck join him, and then rifles through Buck's closet until he finds all three of his button downs Buck had tucked away.

He has to borrow a pair of Buck's slacks and Buck absolutely does not mind that his ass is definitely gonna stretch them out.

With about seventy seconds to spare, Tommy presses Buck to his front door and kisses him just long enough to screw up Buck's meticulous timing - by the time he pulls back and gives Buck enough room to glance at the time on his stove, Buck knows they're gonna hit just enough red lights to make them late.

"I love you too, by the way," Tommy murmurs, and just this once, Buck decides not to be a brat about being five minutes late.

[hannieehaee]

18+ / mdi

content: loser!jeonghan, teasing, afab reader, smut, grinding, penetrative sex, etc.

part 1, part 2

wc: 1545

a/n: its so hard to find pictures of him with long hair AND glasses so u guys will have to get creative with these pictures.

masterlist

after that first time with jeonghan, you'd sadly been unable to see him again in over two weeks.

it's not that you didn't try. life simply kept you away from him for unknown reasons. maybe the higher powers knew you'd break him if you got too much of him all at once. who knows.

when you were finally able to schedule another meeting with the pretty boy, you were ecstatic. maybe you even went out of your way, grooming yourself to perfection in the shower and even buying some cute underwear for him to see when you finally got your way with him again.

the plan was for him to stop by your apartment at 8pm. there was no use in calling him in in the morning knowing what your true intentions with him were. his texts had perfectly communicated his nerves, so you were pretty sure he had a good idea of what would go down tonight rather than studying.

you made sure to pretty yourself up, but without going too overboard. lingerie would probably be too much, so you opted for some simple lace under some skimpy pjs as you waited for the clock to hit 8. but time really could not go any slower.

when 7:58pm hit, you decided to go wait by the door, knowing the cutie would likely want to arrive a little earlier. he was always the type to be seated in class before everyone else. it was an adorable habit, if you said so yourself.

proof of what a good boy he was.

just before it turned 8, you heard some murmurs coming from the other side of your door, leading you to inspect and see if jeonghan was standing on the other side of the door.

then a thought came across your mind.

maybe the cutie was waiting until after 8. perhaps he wanted to not seem desperate. god, so adorable.

"okay, fuck. calm down. it's just- it's just y/n. it's just studying ... yeah. studying," you heard him whisper to himself.

looking through the peephole, you spotted the long-haired boy taking deep breaths, hand coming up at a snail's speed to knock on your door before backing out. this went on a few times before you gave up and decided for open the door for yourself.

best to catch him off guard.

"o-oh! hi ..." he mumbled after the initial scare of your sudden appearance left him — his widened eyes behind his frames were the cutest thing!

"hannie! it's past 8. i thought you were more punctual than that?", you decided to tease him before pulling him into your place.

"ah, i- i'm sorry, i didn't-"

"i'm kidding, hannie. i'm just happy you're here," you grinned at him, "you know, for studying."

"haha, yes, right."

the poor boy awkwardly put down his backpack as you led him over to your couch, signaling for him to take a seat. even when you sat down, he remained standing, looking around awkwardly before letting his knees bend and taking a seat.

as he sat next to you, his hands remained on his knees and his posture was entirely too stiff. you didn't need to know anything about behavioral analysis to be able to tell he felt out of place. his entire demeanor was closed off and maybe even slightly scared.

this made you pout a bit. maybe you should help him out a bit?

scooting closer, your body faced his own. your hand came up to lay on one of his, making him jumo slightly at the sudden touch. the reaction was then followed by a tiny giggle from you and a shy chuckle from him.

"are you nervous? do i make you nervous," you asked in the sweetest manner you could.

he nodded, eyes glued to your connected hands.

"you don't need to be nervous, hannie. i just wanted to ... spend time with you. we had so much fun last time, didn't we?"

from where you sat, he looked like the prettiest thing you'd ever seen. you hoped he took the hint soon, because your resolve was breaking just from seeing that pretty nose and those wide, brown eyes.

"ye-yes," he cleared his throat, finally sneaking a glance at you.

you took a chance and scoot even closer, knees now knocking.

"i was thinking maybe we could just unwind a little bit before we get to the studying. what do you think?" your tone was clear in what you were hinting at. and jeonghan was smart enough to catch onto this, nerves or not.

he'd known since the moment you set up the meeting, but you couldn't blame the poor shy thing if he thought you had been literal in your usage of the word studying.

once again, he hesitated before nodding, gulping when you bit your lip in excitement at his confirmation.

god, you were going to have so much fun with him.

~

"oh, fuck, p-please, i- i'll do anything just, o-oh, fuck, yesyesyes."

"ever felt pussy before, hannie?" you sighed as you let yourself lower onto him, attempting to remain unaffected by the feeling.

you'd been teasing him for a bit, making out with him as you ground down onto his hardness (which, it seemed like he'd been hard since he walked through the door) up until you grew too antsy, opting to rid you both of your clothes so you could feel his skin. that was when the teasing really began, though, as you grabbed onto his cock and ran his tip against your clit, knowing the slick stimulation would have him whining.

that went on for a few minutes (spent by him begging and pleading for you to let him feel you) until this moment.

but nothing couldve prepared you for how fucking good he'd feel once inside you.

you'd already been pulsing at the mere sight of him, but to get him to fill you up? while he cried out and dug his fingers onto the skin of your hips? that was everything and more.

"nnngh, i- n-no, never," he managed between hiccuped gasps — and you hadn't even moved an inch since enveloping him.

"good. this is the only one you will ever feel," you werent sure if that was a threat or a promise, but either one worked.

you began moving then, taking turns between grinding deliciously against him for you down gratification, and bouncing so his eyes could roll further back into his head. both were enjoyable for you and life-ruining for jeonghan.

"f-feel so good, oh, god, fuck, yes!"

"don't stop, oh, please please please, don't stop ..."

"a-again, please! o-oh, that's it, that's- oh, god, yes ..."

he was way more talkative now that he was buried in pussy, his voice going an octave higher as he whined and cried at you, never-ending encouragement leaving his lips. his entire demeanor was breaking you down. you felt a sick gratification from breaking him to an even bigger stammering mess than he was on a regular basis.

you were so close, so near your end that his own orgasm caught you off guard. but you took advantage, tightening around him as your hand went down to toy at your clit, knowing you could get yourself there by the mere look of utter bliss displayed on the angelic features of the boy below you.

the image of jeonghan as he let pleasure take him an toy with him as it pleased was one of the prettiest sights you'd ever seen. this would surely become a visual to revisit time and time again any time you found yourself lonely at night.

endless pretty sighs left his lips as his eyes became wet with tears. he looked almost pained, but the constant mumbles of gratitude and praise told a different story.

your orgasm took the backseat as you allowed yourself to thoroughly enjoy the former virgin be defiled for the first time. you'd never had a virgin before, but now you knew this would be the one and only exception. nothing would ever live up to the angel boy you'd somehow gotten into your bed, nor would you be able to not bring him back again and again.

"i ... thank you," he mumbled after a few moments of silence when his orgasm had subsided.

you couldn't blame him. not when the feeling had taken over his entire body in the way it did. him thanking you was just the cutest thing.

with a hand on his cheek, you caressed the skin, thumb swiping at the wetness under his eye before leaning down to give him a sweet kiss on the lips.

"thank you, angel. i had so much fun," you couldn't help giggling.

he gulped up at you, taking a breath before speaking up again.

"do you, uh, do you think we could .. we could do this again sometime? i, uh, i really- i just-"

"oh, hannie," you interrupted him, somehow invading his personal space even more by pressing kisses to his chest, "we'll be doing this again, don't you worry. you're mine now."

his reaction expressed both fear and relief, but the cock still inside you gave you a way more satisfactory reaction, inspiring you into continuing to defile the boy late into the night.

[synnamonroll666]

You Are Still Human

𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐

𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐

Pairing: Wendigo!Josh Washington x Fem!Reader Description: Josh breaks down over the fact that he cannot live a normal life since his possession and no longer believes that he is truly human. So you find a special way to remind him of his humanity... Warnings: 18+, Smut, Fluff, Angst, Mental Breakdown, Insecurities, P In V, Creampie, Slight Choking, Rough Smut Animalistic Smut, Mention Of Breeding, No Foreplay Or Prep, Pain Kink-ish??? (Let me know if I missed any!) Word Count: 3.2k A/N: So I finally got this done! I didn't expect it to end up this long but as you can see, things got out of hand FAST. 😂 I hope you guys enjoy it! 🖤 Josh Washington Masterlist: 🖤 Taglist: @nuggetsandmoose, @maquillagebookmark, @wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee28374728, @bee-who-isnt-french

𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐

My tired feet slowly shuffle across the hardwood floor as I push myself through the front door of our shared home. I am exhausted after several errands that I had to run today, to say the least. But that's the price I have to pay for pushing them off until right at last minute. Though it wasn't exactly the extra work I had to do that pushed my mind and body to feel so worn out. My loving boyfriend decided to join me, which was a rare occurrence for him.

Ever since the... Incident... He hasn't wanted to go out into the world much. I understand his anxiety of being seen in public with his condition so I never push, but today he insisted on joining me on my mission to finish my to-do list. Perhaps he felt bad that all these burdens were placed on my shoulders with his lack of want to leave the house.

But unfortunately, a face mask to cover up his ripped cheek and sharpened canines was just not enough to cover what he has become. Recovery for Josh was long and hard and we had only just began talking about the possibility of cosmetic surgery. It was a long process before we could even begin worrying about such things.

After leaving the mountain, the spirit of the wendigo left him, not being able to leave where it is bound. But still, traces of an animal-like presence lingered in his behaviors and personality. We didn't know if restoring his humanity was possible, but the doctors were able to recover just enough to get him to a point of leaving the hospital to live a normal life. Though even then, I had to beg to convince them to let me take him home with me.

His parents were hesitant on letting me take care of him, but after some negotiating, they bought a secluded cabin in a swallow forest, just deep enough to give us privacy but not too deep that I would be trapped if I needed to get away. Josh's humanity was indeed resorted, but the primal animal was still within.

And that's where we are now. Josh has an odd habit of forgetting how to act "human" sometimes. Every once in awhile he will stare at someone random and growl lowly, or even nip at the air as though his need to feed was getting too intense. It was worrisome, to say the least. Sometimes I would stay up at night, fearing the one thing that I always worried was inevitable—that Josh would lose control once more.

Though time and time again, he would prove me wrong with a loving and warm cuddle at the end of the day. But sadly, tonight will not be so sweet. I can tell by the way Josh trudges into the living room, his head hung low and shoulders slumped. He wants to be left alone.

Though I understand this, I don't want to leave him with his thoughts again. Bad things happen when Josh is left alone with his thoughts. So I approach the doorway of the living room, leaning against the frame as I watch his tired form from afar. He seems defeated by the way he sat slouched against the soft cushions of our couch.

Slowly, I make my way to him step by step and sit on the couch, my eyes watching him to read his body language. He does not react to my presence, instead staring out into a void of nothingness like his mind is elsewhere. I reach over to the small end table by my side and pull its drawer open, only to retrieve a small, red bag.

I set it on my lap and then turn back to Josh, carefully taking on of his large hands in my own. They have grown a tiny bit since his possession, by an inch for each finger at least. Every part of his body has grown a bit since then. Sometimes it could feel a little intimidating. I run my thumb over the fragile, pale skin on the back of his hand before releasing a tired sigh.

"Your nails are getting long again, sweetheart. Shall I trim them for you?" I ask while reaching for the bag in my lap with my free hand, pulling the zipper to the side to reveal a bunch of nail care tools.

He does not respond verbally, but let's out a huff to let me know that he is fine with it. So with that, I begin my work, trimming and filing away at the sharp and jagged claws. It takes what feels like an hour to get them finished and looking nearly human again. In this time, Josh doesn't move a bit. He is so still, it's hard to tell he is even breathing. But once I finish and go to move my hands away from his, his boney fingers clasp my own.

"Thank... You..." He whispers faintly, his voice coarse and almost ghostly. Life glimmers in his eyes for a brief moment as his light irises study his hands.

But then, after a minute of admiring my work, he stands from his spot on the couch. He begins to pace around the coffee table in the center of the room, as if his mind is wandering, pondering something intense. I watch him for a few moments as he silently walks, feet shuffling along the carpet. But then, he mutters something...

"It's not enough..."

I almost do not catch it, until he repeats the words in a volume just slightly higher than before. But before I know it, Josh is pacing more frantically, whispering the sentence over and over. An eerie dread falls over my body as I watch him, his movements growing more panicked. He seems frightened and enraged, and those feelings seem to grow until he finally snaps, flipping over the coffee table in one swoop of his arms.

"I'm sick of this fucking shit!" He screams in a voice that sounds more like a howl from a wounded animal than anything else. "I'm so sick of being a fucking monster! I'm so fucking sick of people looking at me like one—like I shouldn't be with you or like I'm going to hurt you! I just want to be human again!"

I am stunned, sitting still as ever as if I'm afraid to move. That is until he breaks down, falling to his knees as he let's out a mournful sob. It's as if his spirit has been beaten down to the point of no return by this curse, every day stares, and the pressure of trying to be what he once was. Within a second, I am by his side on the floor, pulling him close to me and embracing him tightly.

"You're not a monster." I whisper sweetly as I caress his thinned out hair, just one more thing he has had to be insecure about since becoming human again. But it never lost its silky texture, which was what I had always loved the most about it.

He shakes his head and whimpers faintly, "I'm just a monster..."

I think for a moment. Usually it's pretty hard to break someone out of this mindset, especially Josh. He has a stubborn way of thinking, which makes it hard to convince him otherwise on a lot of subjects. I continue to pet his hair and think of back when he was human, how much he loved to show me just how much he loved me every day. Of course, a lot of times it would be through physical acts— And finally, it hits me. I know what will break him out of these self-abusive thoughts.

"I want you to prove to me that you're not a monster." I order firmly, which is enough for him to finally raise his head from where it is tucked in my shoulder and look up at me.

"W-What?" He queries just barely above a whisper—just barely enough for me to hear his quivering voice.

I gently caress his cheek, brushing my fingers over his deep scars as I clarify. "Prove to me that you aren't a monster. I know you can. Prove to me that you can feel all the emotions that a normal person can feel, and make me feel them as well in return."

He stares at me for a moment, eyes clearly uncertain about my rather intimate proposition. I can practically see the internal battle going on inside his mind through those glazed over pupils in the center of his white irises. Then, he let's out a shaky breath before biting his lip subtly—a risky habit he still carries from being human, but has to be more cautious doing now with his sharpened teeth.

"I... I don't want to hurt you..." He whimpers like a hurt puppy, glancing back down at his fidgeting fingers.

"You won't," I say as I place my hands on his cheeks, forcing his gaze back to me so he can see my sincerity. "I know you..."

He adverts his eyes once more, only this time looking down at the growing bulge under the rough fabric of his jeans—something I had failed to notice before. Josh had grown so backwards since his turning—so backwards that we haven't had sex since prior to it. I know it is killing him, especially since he was always the horniest guy I knew before this happened.

To make things easier for him, I place my hand on his thigh, resting right beside his needy member. He swallows thickly as he visibly shivers, a thin layer of sweat already coating his skin as his temperature rises. It is a subtle action to test the waters and when I'm sure he is comfortable, my hand goes right to the spot I know he desires so much.

But as soon as my hand cups the twitching length through his pants, something changes. A soft growl is heard rumbling at the back of his throat, and when my eyes flick back up, I am met with a hungry and what looks to be primal gaze. His eyes are no longer soft and sorrowful, but hold something almost animalistic within them.

Before I can say anything, Josh scoops me up and throws me down on the couch, knocking a startled gasp to fly out from me that seems to fall on deaf ears. He is quick to cage me between his arms, and lower his body weight down over top of me to encase me in his grasp, like a predator sealing his prey's fate.

No words are spoken, just the sounds of his ragged breaths and rabid growls fill the air. His body temperature has risen even higher than I have ever felt from him, and as he presses his chest against mine to keep me locked in place, I can feel his racing heartbeat vibrating through his chest as well. It amazes me that he hasn't had a heart attack yet.

But still, it seems as if something is stopping him in place. A lost, uncertain, question glimmers in his orbs as though he is waiting for an answer. Though he is silent, I know what he is asking—the final thing he needs to take things to the next level.

"Go ahead, Josh. I'm ready." I breath faintly, giving him the permission he seeks.

As if from a movie, he tears our clothes off at a supernatural speed. I lay there, naked and dumbfounded as I look at the shreds of clothing that fell all around us, surrounding us like some sort of makeshift nest. I can't help but wonder how in the hell he managed to do that after I just clipped and filed his claws down, but I don't have much time to answer.

A shriek of shock, pain, and pleasure tears from my throat as I feel the familiar sting of something long and hard entering my canal, though this time in a more rough and fast way. Josh was always one for foreplay, but I guess there isn't time for that now, as he is already buried deep within me to the brim within just a split second.

His eyes hold a bit of remorse for only a mere moment, until that hunger returns. I barely have time to breathe as he retracts and enters at a pace I have never seen from him before. His hips pound furiously into mine, a subtle ache setting into my joints almost in an instant as he does his work.  His grip on my waist is enough to burst my organs, while his dull nails cut into my flesh, crimson liquid forming under them more and more with each flex of his fingers. If I hadn't have cut his nails before this, I'd be done for. But I feel like Josh would know to be more careful if there was an actual hazard.

The intensity of his tip hitting my g-spot over and over at a brutal force feels to be enough to actually bruise it. Josh was always so good at finding it but this is a whole new level. I push my head back against the cushions as a cry of painful ecstasy parts my lips. Gripping the edges of the cushions and ripped strands of clothing in my fists, I begin to squirm out of pure instinct. Of course, Josh doesn't like this very much. Before I know it, a tight hand is wrapped firmly around my neck, but not enough to actually hurt me. This shows me that deep down, Josh still has some control.

He pounds into me in a sloppy and rough rhythm, determined like an animal desperate to breed. Grunts, groans, and growls that sound less than human are all that are heard from him. I would be concerned if my mind was clear enough to pay attention. No, right now, all my senses were overwhelmed by Josh, cutting off my awareness of the world around us like a sweet death. I am out of my own body now, my soul flying high in the clouds of heaven.

To my surprise, he pulls out. A soft exhale escapes me has he let's go of my throat, but that's only to quickly flip me over so he can now get in from the back. As soon as he shoves his length back inside, he's moving at a pace yet again unimaginable while his claws grip my hips firmly. He is almost pulling me back onto his cock at times, so my hips can meet his own has he thrusts into me. It's so animalistic and natural and it feels so right. And by the feeling of it, it's just enough to satisfy Josh completely.

With a roaring howl, Josh finally finds the release he has been chasing for so long. His speed and strength increases as he comes undone within me, and he fills me to the brim as if he wants to claim me... Or maybe even breed me. It is all too much for me to bear. The sensation of his heavy load spraying into my sweet spot is enough to send me flying over the edge. I bury my face into the cushion as a shuddering moan falls from my lips, before my voice strains away to nothing. My whole body trembles as I practically melt beneath him, and my walls squeeze and quiver around his cock as though I'm practically begging for more.

Though soon that psychical need gives away into exhaustion as soon as my tense muscles relax once my high subsides, my body falling limp like I no longer can control it. I'm just a doll now, all at the mercy of the man who gives me life. He may think that because I help him to heal, I am his savior. But he couldn't be more wrong. Without Joshua, I would be in a darker place, drowning in my trauma of that night. But now, I have him. And in this moment of silence where nothingness hangs in the air, that thought enters my brain. A small smile curls the corners of my lips while I close my eyes, feeling peace as I soak up his warmth while his hot breath fans my shoulder.

He removes himself from me, both of us letting out a trembling whimper, the overestimation stinging our most sensitive areas momentarily. He does not waste a single breath on words, instead leaning down to capture my lips with his. He is careful—careful to not cut me with his long canines, but also holding a tenderness he used to show before all of this. He knows that I am at my most vulnerable at this time, and will take the most caution to not break me at my fine glass-like state. When he pulls away, he gazes upon me with tear-filled and passionate eyes, his orbs reflecting what seems to be gratefulness and love.

"That wasn't the wendigo in me..." He breathes faintly while raising a hand to caress my cheek in a way so tender that I feel as if I could cry. Though I raise a questioning brow at that statement, not knowing what he means. So he elaborates after taking another second to breathe, still worn out by our recent activities. "I just needed you that badly... So I guess that was the human in me, huh?"

I smile at that and nod, admiring how he blushes at what he admits. For someone who used to be so ballsy and open with his dirty thoughts, Josh could be pretty backwards at times. It was something I always adored so much about him. I run my fingers through his raven, disheveled hair while taking in his stunning features, a soft sigh leaving me before I whisper. "You can have me whenever you like, Josh."

Josh smiles and presses his lips to mine once more, and then lays his head on my chest. I watch him intently, taking note of how he smiles when he hears my heartbeat quicken ever so slightly at the sight of him on top of me. He gently rubs my sides, soon stopping to snuggle into my breasts, seemingly deciding that this nest of our torn clothing would be our bed for the night.

Josh always reminded me of a Great Dane in a way. Despite being a lot bigger than me, there was always enough space on top of me for cuddles in his eyes. It was always quite amusing to me each time his large form would envelope my own. I continue to pet his hair, soft strands threading through my fingers with each touch. He let's out a huff in contentment and kisses my left breast, the sensation of his lips on my skin being absorbed through my flesh and meeting my heart to caress it with the love he feels for me.

"Thank you..." He murmurs, his voice dropping an octave lower and coming out more like a purr due to his exhaustion. My eyes focus on him as he closes his eyes, taking one more deep breath and then continuing his sentence a mere second before he falls into a peaceful slumber on top of me. "For everything..."

𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐⭒𖤐

[gothicrazor]

Anything for you [P1]

Kurt Wagner x Fem!Reader || Rating: PG(?) || WC: 1.4k

Inspiration: Foreigner's God - Hoizer

Content Warning: afab reader, unrequited love (both reader + Kurt), Kurt pining

Authors Note: First time writing for X-Men! Please be kind to me I'm trying pookies, hopefully this turns out okay or I might actually weep! I dunno if anyone would want a part two of this, just lemme know ig??? Also let it be known I used deepL for the few things he said in German... Please don't hate me 😔

Who knew the kiss on the back of a gloved hand could really tank someone's mood as quickly as anything else at a typical Saturday night dinner. Watching the gleam drain from your eyes across the table was something he's sadly used to now. Following your eyes to the end of the table to what he knew you were staring at.

His dear sister and one of his closest friends. Rogue and Gambit. The strongest "couple" next to their leader and his wife. A force strong and immovable. Rogue, too scared to stray. And Gambit, too loyal to look anywhere but her eyes half the time.

And it kills you. Anyone who knows you can see your heart break every time they connect.

Thankfully, no one seems to be paying attention to you, no one but the blue mutant across the table from you. He finds it hard to keep his eyes anywhere but on you. Always has since you met all those years ago. He's seen you at your best, the fierceness burning behind your eyes during the heat of battle. And at your worse... Grieving the loss of something you could never have in the first place.

Your chair screeches, moving across the hardwood of the dining room harder than you intended. Standing up too fast, everyone stared in surprise.

"I'm gonna turn in early." Scott's brow rose behind ruby quartz shades as he stood up.

"Everything okay?" You smile, trying to keep up the facade, not wanting to openly weep in front of the team you call family.

"Just a little tired from training." You grab the edge of your half-eaten plate of dinner before you're met with the rough hand of Logan next to you on your wrist.

"Leave it kid, go get some shut eye." His face almost looks slightly worried, as you don't even put up an argument as usual. Just nodding, you push your chair in and hurry out of the dining room.

Kurt watches you leave, tilting his head to watch you rush up the foyer stairs as chatter picks back up at the table.

"Do you think she's sick?" His ears perk up to the concerned whisper of Jean's voice, looking at Scott as he sat back down at the head of the table.

"It's not unlike her to keep quiet when she's not feeling the best."

"She's barely been eating more than half her food in the past week Scott, I'm starting to get worried. She hasn't been like this since the Professor died." Kurt's head turns, chiming in with his usual soft tone.

"I'll check on her after dinner." Jean and Scott both looked at him. Jean smiling softly as she squeezed his shoulder.

"Thank you, Kurt. She'd probably talk to you before any of us." He nods, his dark hair bouncing lightly before turning his attention back to dinner.

Walking down the hall, he stops at your door, glancing at your nameplate before raising his fist to knock. Freezing for a moment, knowing you'd expect him to come upstairs anytime after you left. Why should he bother to knock at this point?

But Kurt is quite literally a creature of habit. So he does.

Two soft wraps hit the door before grabbing the knob, edging the flat wood open to peek inside. Your room is still dimly lite, only the moon from your window cast over the person-sized lump under the covers of your bed. A soft mutter of your name leaves his lips, yellow eyes glowing as he looks down at the bed.

"Can I come in?" A whimpered 'yes' is all he gets in return, stepping inside with the subtle click of the door closing behind him. The familiar creak of the bed fills the room as he sits on the edge, tail curling over your legs covered by blankets. Hand meeting your side under the covers, eyes falling to their usual worried state, like every time he's comforted you this way before.

Rubbing gently over your lower back, he doesn't say a word, just feeling the slight tremble of your body hidden away from his line of sight. You sniff, pulling the blanket from over your head to look at him, eyes bloodshot and miserable looking. Something he's seen too many times before but still breaks his heart seeing you like this.

"Can you lie with me, please?"

"Anything for you, mein Schatz." He gets up, walking around the bed, pulling the covers back as he climbs in next to you. Fixing them back in place, you assume your natural spot of your head on his chest and his arm around your shoulder. The gentle rub of his hand down your bicep in a soothing gesture.

"Are you okay?" His voice barely raised above a whisper, his cheek settling onto the top of your head. You take in a sharp bit shaky breath trying to calm yourself.

"It's getting harder and harder to be around them... I don't..." You choke up for a second, breathing out a soft whimper.

"I don't know... How much longer can I stand to see them together... It's so unfair of me to feel this way because he'll never love me... Not like Anna, but I just can't... Stop it. I just - I feel terrible for so many reasons." Kurt hugs you tighter, knowing that feeling all too well. Unrequited affections for someone who'll never see you as anything more than a good friend. It almost hurts him knowing you're feeling how he feels constantly.

"I know, I wish I could take the pain away from you." You shudder, sniffling against his chest. Tears welling up in your eyes as you hold onto him like a lifeline, trying to ground yourself in desperation. Squeezing your eyes shut, the tears slipped, soaking the front of his suit.

"I feel so stupid." You whine, starting to hiccup against him, tears sliding past your lashes in groves. Kurt shushes you, moving his hand to your back to cradle you closer. Sharp claws raking over the back of your uniform, gentle touch as he always has with you. His hand moves up, thumb rubbing over your cheek and turning up your chin to look at him.

"You are not stupid, meine Liebe. It's okay to feel this way. The heart wants what it wants. Unforgiving or not, you can't help that."

"Why does it have to be him of all people?" His lips turned to a frown, seeing the hurt behind your eyes. Still wiping your eyes with his thumb, he just shakes his head.

"I wish I could give you the answers. Remy is... A kind man who deeply cares for those he loves. I can see the appeal. But you'll be okay. Eventually, I'm sure of it. You're very strong after all." You just blink, breath quivering as you start to calm down a bit.

"I'm strong..." You mutter under your breath, making him smile slightly before your head goes back to him. Finding his shoulder to lean on, you take in a deep breath, shutting your eyes as you exhale and repeating the words like a prayer.

"Ja, the strongest I know."

"Thank you, Kurt, I don't know what I'd do without you." You give a weak smile as you relax against him, feeling his head leaning against yours.

"And you'll never have to find out, that's a promise." You smile a little wider, a chuckle escaping your lips.

"Can you keep holding me for a little while longer?" He smiles against the top of your head, soaking in the shared warmth between the two of you.

"Of course." You sink into his body, putting your full weight against him. His grip tightened around you. Taking in a deep breath, his eyes wandered from your relaxed expression to the window. Watching the night sky as you slowly drift off in his arms.

Feeling you go slack in his grip, Kurt looks at how relaxed you are now. Thumb moving back over your delicate features like a feather. Something he's done too many times now. But you're so beautiful to him. He can't help but want to touch you. Lips pressing the crown on your head, lingering longer than necessary.

"Ich liebe dich..." His eyes shifted back down to your face, waiting for a reaction he never got. Good or bad. It's just another confession that's gone unheard dozens of times now. No matter how much he's said it.

Smiling at your sleeping expression, he moves down the bed. Shifting onto his side to hold you against his chest. His tail wraps around your waist as he keeps you close.

Cherishing the little moments, he gets to pretend he has your heart... No matter how much it hurts his heart.

♡Thanks for reading♡

[tokoyamisstuff]

A/N: guys pls tell me the exact names if you request sth, there's so many of those men and I don't wanna accidentally leave out those you want🙈

gn! Reader I no warnings

Anderson - Words of Affirmation

Being the well read man that he is - plus the fact that too much physical intimacy makes him uncomfortable - he prefers showing his love through words, both written or voiced.

Since he's away on missions more often than not, he'll remind you of his undying love in other ways. You'd spend hours on the phone talking about everything from trivialities to deep conversations.

He's pretty repressed and secretive about his inner world, but always has a quote from the bible or any other literature ready to put his feelings into words.

Letters are his favourite way of showing how he feels about you. It just comes easier to him than in person. They're very poetic, and even when he's not abroad he tends to leave some for you to find.

Alucard - Quality Time

Compared to his own, your life is just so painfully short that he wants to savor every single second of it. Mostly it's not even about doing something special, just simply being together.

The relationship will progress very fast due to the same reason. For him there's no way you shouldn't be living with him as soon as things get serious. Will accomodate to your mortal needs as good as he can, of course.

He's the kind of man that would always be present, even if away on missions he'd still have a familiar nearby for your protection (and simply to feel close to you).

Your humanity is way too precious for him to take away for his selfish desire of having you forever, but he'll eternally be grateful for the brief time with you and the impact it made on his life.

The Captain - Physical Touch

What this man can't tell you through words he'll express in other ways - and damn he's addicted.

Always has a need to be close to you, and as soon as you're in range he needs to feel you somehow: A hand on the small of your back, his chin atop of your head, his fingers intertwined with yours. No matter what you're doing or who might see, he doesn't really care. Most of the time it's subconscious either way.

He's surprisingly innocent and careful with his touch, as if you're a porcellain doll that might break under his strenght. Adores things like brushing your hair or simply tracing the lines of your face when you sleep.

On the other hand your touch is so balmy to him that this man will practically melt under your fingertips. Every second he cannot feel it is sweet torture.

Walter - Acts of Service

Do I even have to explain? It's literally what he was made to do. Hard to outgrow things you're used to ever since childhood.

There's nothing he cannot do - and if there is, he's willing to learn. Over time he'll know all of your likes/dislikes, habits, etc. by heart and through sheer observation alone. He is also very eager to help you achieve your goals through any means necessary.

He's a man with love for detail, putting in effort even in the smallest daily gestures. With him even the most trivial day will make you feel like royalty, and he is very mindful to support you in any way he can.

Sadly he tends to overextend himself in an anxious endeavour, so you really need to remind this man that he is loved and appreciated even without being 'useful'.

Maxwell - Receiving Gifts

The whole 'affection' thing is new territory for this sociopath, and he has absolutely no idea how to approach it. So he goes about it the way he always does to cover up for what he lacks - overcompensating!

Deep down he's a very insecure man that feels he needs to prove being worthy of your affection, but he also simply thinks you deserve nothing less.

His gifts will always be very personal and thoughtful, trying to show you just how much he cares without actually having to say it. He also loves planning special dates for the two of you to make the most out of the little free time he can spend with you.

Ironically he is very humble when it comes to receiving any kind of affection from your side. He's not used to anything but crumbs, and needs a while until he learns allowing someone to love him properly.

[adhdzagreus]

curtain call

The Mechanisms are uncharacteristically quiet as they walk off the stage. Even Jonny doesn’t know what to say as the remaining eight space pirates file into the dressing room of the venue they booked for their last ever show on Earth. 

The first one to break the silence is the Toy Soldier who sniffles, gasps tremulously, and then wails, “Is all that really going to happen? With the—the black holes and the bar fights and the octokittens and everything?” 

Jonny stifles a groan. This is exactly why he’d locked it out in the first place. What’s going to happen is what’s going to happen, and they all might as well accept it. 

To make matters worse, the Toy Soldier’s sniffling has set off some of the more sensitive Mechanisms. Ivy pats it on the shoulder with a forlorn look, eyes glassy with unshed tears, and Marius’ fragile expression suggests that if Ivy starts crying, he’ll follow suit. 

Tim has his arm around Ashes’ waist, as if worried they might disappear, and though his metal eyes betray no sadness, the firm set of his mouth worries Jonny more than anything else. 

“The odds of us changing the future now that it’s been written are over three hundred million to one,” Ivy says sadly. “It’s statistically impossible that we will live forever.” 

“B-b-but we have so many more songs left to sing!” the Toy Soldier weeps. “Tales to tell! Wars to wage!” 

“And we will,” Jonny says shortly. “None of us are instantly about to keel over, are we?” 

“N-no?” the Toy Soldier says. 

“Everyone seems in decent health to me,” Marius says quietly. He holds Ivy’s hand in both of his. 

“So don’t worry about it,” Jonny says. 

“That’s easy for you to say,” Marius says. “You’re not dying for another millennia. I could get eaten by octokittens tomorrow.” 

Jonny’s stomach twists, and he wrenches his mouth open to retort, but someone interrupts him. 

“No,” Raphaella says sharply. “You will not. We know for a fact that we each die alone. I’m not letting you out of my sight, and you’re certainly not going to check on the octokittens any time soon. I’m planning to have Ivy feed them when we arrive back at the ship.” 

“It’s not the same now that I know they eat Marius,” Ivy sniffles. 

Marius’s expression shatters. “Don’t hold it against them, Ivy! They’re just hungry! They can’t help it! Don’t be sad!” he pleads. 

Jonny feels sick as Ivy starts to cry harder, expounding on the hunting habits of felines, which only makes Marius more upset. He throws himself into a chair and starts taking his makeup off with a wet wipe, trying and failing to ignore them as Raphaella attempts to comfort them both. 

“You’re being awfully callous about all this,” Tim says, still with one arm around a stony-faced Ashes. Brian and the Toy Soldier have joined the fray, and Brian’s platitudes about everything coming to an end in time are almost as unhelpful as the Toy Soldier’s weeping and wailing. 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Jonny snaps.

“Well, you could at least pretend to be sad like the rest of us,” Tim says. “I know you’re all excited to die, but that doesn’t mean the rest of us are.” 

“God damn it, Tim,” Jonny snaps, throwing the wet wipe on the floor. “You think I’m not sad?” 

“You’re not acting like it,” Tim replies. “Marius had a point. You’ve got a run-up and a death you’re looking forward to. Ashes here could go at any time.”

“Hey, babe, don’t bring me into this,” Ashes mumbles. 

“Am I wrong?” Tim says. 

“Yeah, you fucking are wrong!” Jonny shouts. “You think I want to die alone in some backwater asteroid bar centuries after the rest of you are gone? Yeah, I’m excited to die, but that doesn’t mean I want to watch the rest of you disappear first!” 

The rest of the dressing room falls quiet, and Jonny realizes belatedly that he was shouting. Worse, he feels tears in his eyes, and he scrubs at them angrily, smearing the remains of his face paint. 

“Oh,” Gunpowder Tim says. “I guess I didn’t think about that.” 

“You choose how you go out,” Jonny says. “I have to wait until it finally decides to fucking stick. You know how many times I’ve been stabbed in the heart? I could go start a barfight on an asteroid tomorrow, but I guarantee it won’t stick.”

“All the same,” Tim says quietly. “I’d prefer you didn’t risk it.” 

“And I’d prefer you wore your fucking seatbelt, but we don’t get to choose, now do we?” Jonny says. 

Tim flinches, and Ashes frowns at Jonny who takes a deep, shuddering breath. 

“I—I mean. I don’t want you to die either,” he says. “But we have to die s-sooner or later. And I don’t want to waste whatever time we have left crying about it.” 

Despite this, tears are dripping from his eyes as he speaks, flowing faster than he can scrub them away. No one says another for a long moment, but he feels the eyes of several of his crewmates on him. 

“C’mere, you mean ol’ bastard,” Ashes says. They spread the arm not curled around Tim’s waist and gesture for him to approach. 

“What?” Jonny says, standing up and shuffling closer. 

Ashes crushes him to their chest in a one-armed hug, and Jonny breaks and grabs both Ashes and Tim as best he can. Before he can recover, he feels someone else wrap their arms around him from behind, and before he can protest, he’s at the center of a tangled mass of weeping space pirates—colloquially known as a group hug. 

It’s awkward with so much metal and wood and weapons, but Jonny can’t even pretend to be annoyed by it. He’s too focused on not breaking down into sobs. He’ll be damned if he lets his crew see him cry anymore than they already have. 

“I love you all very much,” the Toy Soldier says happily. “Best space pirate crew ever.” 

Jonny rolls his eyes and sobs silently. Hopefully, buried as he is in a mass of bodies, no one will notice. 

“Well, now that that’s been dealt with,” DrumBot Brian says, “I would like to return to the Aurora. I am concerned our parking pass has expired.” 

Jonny sighs. “Fine, but you stay away from the damn airlock.”

“Your concern is touching and noted,” says the DrumBot. 

The Mechanisms disperse and hurriedly gather up their things. Jonny lovingly coils up his microphone and tucks it safely away, and the band of space pirates begin to make their way back to the Aurora and off to destinations unknown. 

[mingigoo]

...ramen before you go? choi Jongho (m)

🍜 pairing ⇢ neighbor!Jongho x (fem) reader

this story is based on true events I have actually experienced. (Cat stuck in sauce can, cat stuck behind appliances) but sadly, no Jongho to the rescue. #saucecat

🍜 synopsis ⇢ you thought things couldn’t get worse after finding a cat in the dumpster behind the liquor store, but now here you were, alone in your new apartment, staring at that damn cat that somehow got stuck behind the washing machine. You needed some strong hands….but the minute you met him, you didn’t want him to leave. Do you want some ramen before you go?

🍜 genre/au ⇢ next-door neighbors au, comedy, smut, fluff

🍜 warnings/tags ⇢ 18+ minors DNI, shower sex, completely unhinged and does not make any sense. this is all over the place and just for fun, so please have a good laugh, comedy to smut, oral sex (female receiving), hair pulling, cream-pie, profanity, jongho is the cat savior, and also a little sleepy and drunk off beer

🍜 word count ⇢ 2.8k words

🍜 taglist ⇢ @jjhmk @yesv01 @roe-sinning @meowmeowminnie @yeritheloml @yukine-smx @y00nzin0 @8tinytings @halesandy @shegotboreddsoo @kangyeosangelic @sanshineeeeee @kodzukein @hwaightme @likexaxdaydream @ssaboala @gtr-skyline-lover

ateez masterlist

Your life flashed before your eyes.

Well, your cat’s seventh life, that is.

“I swear to god, I’m gonna go fucking insane.” you hissed. “I literally just found you and you already lost seven out of nine lives.”

You stared at your little troublemaker, the cat you found in the alleyway behind your favorite liquor store in the dumpster. Surely enough, he still caused the same amount of trouble since the very first day you found him. 

The situation was even worse, especially because you were four glasses in on your red wine. You barely had enough brain power to comprehend this all.

He stared at you, bug-eyed, through the glass that surrounded his little head—an empty spaghetti sauce glass he had found in the trash can. You were in the middle of moving  into this apartment. Boxes were all around you, your furniture not even set up yet, but here your cat was, stuck in a sauce can and sitting there like he did nothing.

For fucks sake carrot I don't have time for this.” you groaned, looking around quickly for paper towels. When you realized you didn't even have utensils out, yet alone paper towels, you let out an aggravated noise and waltzed over to your cat. “You’re going to be the death of me.”

You grabbed onto the glass container, gritting your teeth while pulling it gently.

“Meow.”

“Dude, I'm trying to help you, dammit,” you growled, playing tug of war with Carrot. “Now sit still.”

Carrot, in fact, did not sit still. You let go after the first battle, letting out an irritated sigh before trying again.

After an ungodly amount of time, you were finally able to free the dumpster cat, only for him to look like he’s had war flashbacks. 

Covered in spaghetti sauce, Carrot looked like he was bathing in blood. You ran a hand through your hair as the little bitch stared at you like he was gonna screech. After a moment of uncertainty, Carrot licked his sauce-covered lips and waltzed away, still drenched in sauce.

“Come back here!” you yelled, but the more you followed him, the faster he went. You ran through your living room, covered with boxes, and down the hall to where your laundry room was. “I will literally break down right now if you get in that washer. Tears and everything. You better feel bad for me.”

Carrot turned around at those words, but then blissfully stared at the open washer. He had a habit of sleeping in it, and it did cross your invasive mind about how it would clean him up without the use of paper towels.

y/n, that would drown him. Shut the fuck up, brain.

“Carrot.” you swallowed your anger, knowing it was just your stress—and maybe the fact that in the last twenty-four hours, he ate your sandwich out of your hand, sat in the sink while the water was running, started hissing at his own reflection, drank out of your glass of alcohol, and got high of catnip and broke a picture frame. He was cute…too cute. You wished you could get away with his antics. “Don't. Touch. The. washer.” 

If a cat could smirk, you were certain that’s just what he did. With one swift movement, Carrot leaped into the washer, rolling around in it in sheer happiness. 

Oh, to be a cat.

“You know what? Fine! Roll around, do whatever.” you huffed, tossing your hands up in the air while turning around. As you tried to walk away from the devil himself, you heard a boom, a hiss, and a squeal. 

When you looked back at the washer, Carrot was no longer in it. He was nowhere in sight, actually.

“Carrot??” you said anxiously, only hearing a terrified meow, causing you to run over to the machine as quickly as you could.

“MEOW.”

You looked over the washing machine to see bright yellow orbs staring back at you as he moved frantically behind the block of metal. You desperately tried to pull the machine back, only to feel like a goddamn weak ass shrimp.

“I’m trying, I’m trying,” you breathed, groaning as you tried to move it. “Now's the time I am regretting quitting the gym.”

Several minutes pass—you were on the ground sweating like a lunatic. Carrot had gone quiet—he wasn't dead, just probably disappointed in your weak attempt to save his eighth life. He was most definitely shaming the hell out of you by now with his little judgy eyes.

As you thought about asking for help, you knew 911 couldn't save you now. Or ever. 

So you did what any sane single woman would do after finding out a man lived across the hall.

You zoomed out the door to knock on his door.

He opened it after a moment, his hair a mess and his eyes all sleepy.

Awe fuck, did you wake him up?

Whatever, it's too late now.

“Um, hello?” he yawned, and as he did, you looked down at your watch to check the time. It was eleven at night, how could you totally lose track of time? 

Carrot.

“Hey, listen, um,” you sighed, running a hand through your hair as you noticed how good looking he was. “I need help. Are you strong? You look strong.”

He blinked at you, brown eyes picking apart your expression. His lips were pretty, his eyes were pretty, his arms looked….strong. Mmhhhmm. Yummy.

“I guess so.” he nodded, tilting his head at you. “What do you need?”

“You.” you spewed out, and then laughed at yourself. “Dammit, I mean, yes I do need you, but not like in any other way than your strong arms. I mean that would be nice bit uh..fuck, You seem like a very nice man….”

As you trailed off, it was pure silence, other than the war cries of Carrot in the distance.

“I need you to free my cat from his imprisonment.”

“You need me to do what?”

—

“You couldn't move a washer?”

You and the strong gorgeous man stood in the middle of your laundry room, staring at the machine that held carrot captive. Strong man looked so sexy in his tight little t-shirt and sweats—god, you were so touch-deprived. Here you were creating scenarios in your head with a stranger that involved a washing machine…

“Oh, uh.” you gulped. “We can't all be hercules, man.”

He yawed, causing you to look over in his direction. He looked young, maybe younger than you, with blackish brown hair and glossy eyes. His body looked delish, if you could say so yourself. You would pounce on him right then and there if you could.

“All right, let me move it for you.” the minute he pushed up his sleeves, you swallowed your pride. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck—

Within a second, he pulled the heavy machine with ease, letting out a sexy grunt that nearly made you moan. The wine was indeed hitting your slut system, for sure. The minute there was enough space for him to reach down to grab the garbage cat, he pulled him out, holding him far away from him after realizing how dirty he was.

“Carrot!! You’re alive!!”

“Yo, why is he covered in…sauce?” he made a face, turning to you with that gorgeous body of his. “And it’s name is carrot?”

“He was born in a dumpster. Old habits die hard.” You said as a matter of fact my. “And he’s orange. Self-explanatory.”

Muscle man laughed, setting the cat down. “I guess that explains it.”

A few moments of silence. You didn’t like the emptiness.

“….Do you think that’s why he loves the washer?” you wondered out loud. “Like, it looks like a mini dumpster. Probably feels like one too when he rolls around like an idiot.”

The cat savior laughed shyly, but his eyes said otherwise.

“You know,” you pondered as he looked at you as if he were going to tear you apart. “I don't know your name.”

“Jongho,” he mumbled, a smile finally reaching his eyes. He still looked so tired, but you were too selfish to let this opportunity go. “And you?”

“y/n.” you smiled, looking him up and down like a crazy person. “I just moved in.”

“I know.”

“You know?”

“Mhm. Watched you fall down the stairs and play it off earlier. I was gonna help, but you seemed like you would have been embarrassed so…” he started to laugh. “Sorry. I should've helped you.”

You smirked. “Well, you made up for it now.”

You stood close, unaware how close you actually were. He smiled down at you while you looked at his lips.

“I should go…” he hummed, eyes narrowed on you.

“Yeah,” you breathed.

He looked at you lustfully for a moment longer, and then broke away from the trance to walk away. You followed him to the door, but right before he could leave, you blurted out the only thing on your mind.

“Would you…like ramen, you know, before you go?”

He was facing away from you, and as you said those words, he stopped in the middle of the doorframe. 

“Depends…” he murmured, turning around to face you. His eyes were no longer sleepy, rather they looked murderous. “Are you…the ramen?”

You nodded. 

“Mhm.” 

He smirked. 

“I guess I can eat.”

You crossed the distance, tugging on his arm to pull him to you as you slammed the door behind him. You shoved yourself onto him, pressing his body up against the door, lips colliding at the same time. 

His hands ravaged your body, moving from your hair, to your face, to your waist, to your ass. He moaned into your mouth causing you to arch your body into him like a cat.

“Wanna move this into the shower? I need a shower.” you breathed against his lips as he kissed you. 

“Mhm.” he moaned against your lips, picking you up with that superhuman strength of his. “Where is it?”

“Last door in the hall.” you slurred, his arms holding onto your back and your legs. He held you like you were a feather, hot damn.

He walked blindly towards the bathroom, bumping into the walls and door knobs aggressively. You gripped the back of his head, kissing him like you knew him forever.

You didn't even know him for ten minutes. 

This is a new low, y/n. A new low.

Oh well, hot guy trumps embarrassment.

The minute he found the bathroom, you nearly tumbled into the room as he opened the door. He pressed you up against the wall, tugging at your lip with his teeth like an animal.

You slid off of him to turn on the water, sparing no time to undress him like a mannequin. He stood there, a boyish smile on his face as you pulled his shirt over his head, revealing his toned body. He was stunning, my god.

“It must be the beer I drank,” he spoke lustfully. “But damn, you’re the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.”

“Ditto, hercules.” you hummed against his lips as you unbuttoned his jeans, smiling into a kiss. “Now shut the fuck up.”

He undressed. You followed, although he seemed inclined to pull your clothes off himself. He had a goofy smile on his face as he tugged your bra off, making you smile with him.

“So pretty,” he whispered, tugging you back into him with a giggle. You stumbled into the shower, freezing cold water hitting your back and dripping down your head, drenching you from head to toe. You would have cared about the temperature any other time, but you were too focused on sucking this stranger's face. He didn't seem to mind, either. 

You tasted the coldness of the water on his lips, your hands running up his bare skin to reach his hair. He moaned into your mouth as he bucked his hips into you, breathing heavily.

“I want you to eat me out.” you moaned as his hands danced at your hips. “That was our deal.”

He smirked, burying his head into your shoulder as the water pounded against you. “You want what?” he pestered, tongue dancing in your mouth as you lost your train of thought. “I didn't hear you.”

You groaned, tossing your head back. “I said I want you to eat me out.”

“Eat what?”

“Me. Out.”

“Me out what?”

You shoved him against the cold tiles of the shower wall, glancing down at that sinister smile of his. “I want you to fuck me with your mouth.”

His hands smoothed your curves, his eyes everywhere on your body. “Alrighty then, no need to get harsh.” he laughed, gaining pleasure from having you repeat those words over and over again. “I heard you the first time.”

He knelt down in the shower, his lips meeting yours immediately. His hands were gripping your thighs, and you couldn't help but admit you liked seeing him, or any man, on their knees for you. His tongue slid through your core, igniting an eternal flame that only he could extinguish. He looked up at you through those long eyelashes of his, and you gripped his head, pulling his hair like your life depended on it.

“Fuck.” you hissed, slamming your head back against the wall. “Don't stop.”

He hummed against you, his hands moving to grab your ass tightly. Every time he moaned it felt like a wave of electricity was flowing through your body—an intoxicating feeling on top of the wine.

He pulled back, even after hearing your command. As he looked up at you from his lowly position, it made you feel like you could rule the world.

“I would like to fuck you, you know, with more than just my mouth.”

You shivered under the coldness of the water—and his touch. “Yes, please. Go right ahead.”

He smirked at your response, standing up and gripping your hips without a word. He then shoved you up against the tiles, positioning himself just right, only to shove himself in like he owned the place. You gasped at his sudden entrance, your walls tightening around his dick.

He pumped into you, holding onto your waist from behind and pressing his other hand against the wall. You moaned as he quickened the pace, and either you were too lost in his trance or the wine added to the feeling, but you were so far gone that you didn't even notice when he picked you up mid stroke, holding you to his body as your back pressed against the wall. He fucked you silly, like he did it a million times before. You couldn't get enough of him, even if you just met him today. He was all you needed. 

“Come inside me,” you groaned, your tone serious. His movements slowed at your words,  unsure of what to do.

“H-huh?” he continued to pound into you, but he was reaching his high way sooner than he wanted to. “Into you? Are you on the pill?”

“Pfft. yeah. Fuck children,” you shut your mouth, hating yourself for saying that while he was literally inside you. “That sounded bad, jeez. What I’m saying is you can come inside me. Please.”

He laughed at you, but was too focused on finishing that he ignored your craziness. His breaths began to quicken, his hips bucked in shallower movements as he reached his climax. You let out a cry as you felt the warmth of his come coat you from the inside, dripping down your thigh as his head fell onto your shoulder.

Your shaky breaths tangled together, the water slowly feeling colder and colder as you looked at each other.

And then you both laughed.

“I…wow.” Jongho laughed, setting you down slowly so he didn't hurt you. 

You quickly reached to turn off the water, not holding back the string of curse words attached to your tongue.

You chuckled, wrapping your arms around his neck. “That was fun.”

He smiled at you, leaning in to kiss your lips, once again like he’s done it before. “It’s nice to um…meet you, y/n. I don't think I ever said that yet. It’s not like I met you twenty minutes ago or anything.”

“I’m hoping you’ll keep coming over to rescue my cat…” he mumbled, a knowing smirk on your face. “And to eat some ramen once in a while. A lot in a while, actually.”

“Mhm. Just knock on the door, I’ll be at your service.”

Still in each other’s arms, you were unsure about your future with the cat savior, but yet, this was just enough. It was strange, but enough.

For now, at least.

“So, is now the right time to tell you I’m ready for round two?”

[pucktoxicity]

i had a whole message ready to go and dropped my phone, so this might end up being shorter. first, as context, i went to a massive hockey school and was with my boyfriend who was on the team throughout our time there and after. still talk with him, but i’ll be honest and say that all the sh*t that comes with having a relationship with someone that’s high profile was just too much.

1. the reading stuff is hilarious. obviously they can read—they just don’t HAVE to read. even in college. was at a party at one of his teammate’s places and opened the fridge to grab something and there were textbooks, still in the plastic, sitting on the top shelf. it was a class i was also taking. when I confronted the guy about it as I held said textbooks in hand laughing (it was near midterms) he said “it doesn’t matter. i’ll pass.” he passed and it definitely wasn’t because he understood a damn thing in that course.

2. cliques exist on teams. ill break that down further. my boyfriend hung with like five of his teammates and a handful of athletes from another big sport at my school. those were who we were around on any given day. on weekends after games, or if there was a stretch with a break from some games, the entire team would go out. your ass better be at those team events or if not you better have a good reason why you’re not there. there was an issue off the ice involving the team and there was definitely a rift afterwards because a few of the guys were not there. it made for a really bad season with a team that should have done well.

3. they’re not tagging pics in real-time. they’ll post stuff a few days later with the tags on the locations so people think they know where they are if they post anything at all. that’s equally true for public and private accounts where tracking can be controlled. im sure most people recognize this, but i’ve never seen it stated outright. i was even asked to hold off on posting things until we were somewhere else even though my accounts are private. if they want you to know where they are, you’ll know where they are.

4. for the love of god do not send them nudes. not unless you want that entire team and possibly more to have them. getting nudes was a game to them.

5. which brings me to—they are ALWAYS involved in some sort of game or challenge with one another. the nudes was one, i can’t give anything more specific because i’d likely dox myself. not really feeling up for that blowback. just—they’re always betting each other over something and keeping tabs/score with something likely unrelated to hockey. sometimes it’s funny and sometimes “ew.” but there’s always something.

6. the sh*t they do off ice is hilarious and often unexpected. one of my best friends is the biggest a-hole on the ice, led the team in penalties, etc. off ice he’s the nicest human you will ever meet. he doesn’t read for fun, but he’s a nerd over a specific genre of movies that you wouldn’t expect. video games are pretty constant. they’re psychotically competitive even with those. watching giant man children rage quit video games is hilarious. oh and some of them have the weirdest habits. can’t really elaborate on that one. if anything i’d send it another time.

7. as someone that had a whole school watching my every move and then a whole city watching my every move, i can tell you it gets old fast—for everyone involved. i had people (guys and girls) show up where i lived. 95% of the sh*t i read online that was supposedly about me, him, me and him, etc was not even close to true. take what you see about any of the players or the people involved with them with a grain of salt.

8. sadly some of the worst guys are the ones in the longest relationships, or had families, etc. that was really horrifying to me. strictly anecdotal to my experience with two teams and their circles, but yeah. it was bad.

9. because the question comes up a lot—where? i met my boyfriend at mandatory study hall freshman year because im also an athlete. we never talk hockey. i talk hockey with my other friends and family, never with him or his teammates. he’s in it all day everyday, it’s his job, just like when im done with work i know i don’t want to talk about it, they’re the same way. if he brings it up, sure, but i’m sure as hell not gonna be the one to do that.

and for those keeping score: tall and natural blonde. many of his teammates over the years dated brunettes but they almost always ended up dying their hair blonde. so I don’t know if it’s blondes initially all the time. if anything i would just add that WAGs are their own beast with all the peer pressure and competitiveness of a team. the going blonde thing might be due to the pressures within that group.

way longer message than i intended but hopefully some valuable insight for those who have asked. as you’ve said, they’re humans like anyone else, their job is just different. oh, and summers were mostly working with skills coaches and rehabbing injuries/getting surgeries that are overdue that weren’t publicized. the public doesn’t know half the sh*t these guys are playing through.

everyone thank this anon for her service because this is absolutely perfect, no notes.

the ones i can most agree with / corroborate from my own experiences: she is 100% correct. do not send these guys nudes (i never have & never will, but know that they get them spread around quickly!!), and the same goes for competing over things. good lord, it’ll be the stupidest shit sometimes too but somehow it becomes a competition 😭 it’s crazy! and the same goes for schoolwork. it’s not just hockey. i have a friend who went to an SEC school with a historic football team (and sorority rush, cough cough), and she said the same thing about football players. they’ll pass. no matter what. doesn’t mean they’ll have a 4.0, but they’ll pass enough. i’m sure it’s the same with big hockey schools up here and the midwest as it is in the south with football. that doesn’t surprise me at all, unfortunately.

also, that last line. the public doesn’t know half the shit these guys are playing through. YUP. the things their bodies go through in not just a season, but in one game, are absolutely insane. and she’s very correct about privately-handled, unannounced offseason surgeries. 🙂‍↕️

i think the most interesting thing for you guys to see is her insight that most brunette WAGs end up going blonde & that whole explanation of the blonde WAG stereotype in every level of hockey.

whoever you are, i adore you, this was an amazing read, and if you ever want to talk privately in dms and stuff, i’d love to! if not, no worries, and thank you for stopping by & talking to me 🥰💋❤️

[steddieas-shegoes]

Hi!! I love your writing! Submitting a request for fluff where famous/ rockstar Eddie is at an event where Steve is very clearly ogling him. People suggest they flirt (thinking it won't go anywhere bc Eddie is notoriously hard to get) until they end up seen together, completely smitten (they've been together for eons at this point, no one seems to add up their matching scars or rings)

I will admit some of this was written when I was on some heavy dose pain meds so if it’s completely incoherent or something doesn’t have continuity it’s because I forgot I started this and then just picked it back up without really reading most of it. I always love reading rockstar Eddie, especially when Steve has to be like his assistant or bodyguard instead of his date to things. They say write what you know so this is what I know! - Mickala ❤️

———————————————————————

Eddie Munson was nominated for a Grammy.

It almost didn’t seem possible that he was sitting in the same room as musicians he’d looked up to his whole life.

And Steve was here, too.

Technically, Steve was his plus one, but since he couldn’t exactly have a boyfriend in public, he was disguised as his assistant.

He didn’t necessarily mind as long as it meant having Steve by his side for the biggest night of his life.

But then the band’s manager told him that he couldn’t sit next to Steve, that it would look weird that he sat next to his assistant instead of the band members or a date. So Steve was across the table, looking sadly down at his plate of disgusting fancy food.

Eddie couldn’t really blame him; He felt pretty upset too.

But then he was expected to mingle for a bit, and Steve was instructed to stay at the table. It wasn’t that they expected to be able to do everything together tonight, but it was quickly turning into Eddie being unable to spend any time with him.

He mingled.

He felt Steve’s eyes on him the entire time.

But he resisted looking back.

Instead, he played with the ring Steve got him the year before on his ring finger. It was a plain silver band, the most plain thing Eddie wore.

Right before the actual awards ceremony started, Steve snuck up behind him, placed a hand on his lower back, and whispered in his ear.

“Can’t wait for my Grammy winning fiancé to fuck me on every surface of our hotel room tonight.”

And then he walked away.

He walked away like he hadn’t just broken Eddie’s brain.

Eddie called it after that, unable to focus on any conversation that didn’t involve any of Steve’s plans for the night.

By the time he got back to the table, Steve was smiling at him in a way that told him he was in trouble. He loved that smile.

Eddie felt a nudge and turned to see the guitarist for a band in a different category smirking at him from the next table over.

“Man, that guy has been staring at you all night. Isn’t he your assistant?”

Eddie did what he practiced: he lied.

“Oh, yeah! That’s Steve. He’s more security than anything, but he’s playing assistant tonight. Can’t really break him of bodyguard habits though,” Eddie shrugged as if to say ‘what are ya gonna do?’

“I dunno, dude. Seems like he might be into you.”

“Nah, I think you’re reading into it,” Eddie shook his head.

But when he turned back to his plate and glanced at Steve, Steve was practically glaring at him.

“Gareth,” Eddie whispered out of the corner of his mouth.

“What?” Gareth said at a normal volume, like the fucking oblivious idiot he was.

Eddie rolled his eyes and leaned in to try to get the point across that they needed to be quiet.

“I think I’m gonna skip the after party tonight. Steve’s not having a good time and I’m kinda not interested in another two hours of having to pretend he’s just my assistance. Think you guys can handle it without me?”

“Yeah, man. No problem.”

Gareth quickly turned back to his date, who probably had never even listened to their music before, but was hand chosen by their manager when Gareth admitted he didn’t have a date.

The rest of the guys had actual dates, girls they’d been with for months, or in Jeff’s case, years.

But none of them had what he and Steve had.

And it sucked that he was stuck having to pretend that he wasn’t completely in love with him.

So he made an executive decision that when the awards were over, he’d feign a headache and claim his assistant could ride with him back to the hotel so the rest of the guys could enjoy the night.

He gave Steve a look that begged patience, begged him to just enjoy the night as it was the best he could.

And because Steve was a good fiancé, a good person, he smiled and took a sip of his wine before involving the person next to him in a conversation.

But the awards started up shortly after, and they didn’t have to pretend to want to talk to anyone else. Eddie managed to find Steve’s foot under the table, started running his foot up Steve’s leg until it was just above his knee, until Gareth nudged him and whispered that he was sinking down in his chair and it was almost their category.

Eddie sat back up, smirking at the way Steve was trying so hard to focus on the stage, but his eyes were glassy and his cheeks were red.

When they announced “Best Rock Album”, and all the nominees, everyone at the table sat up straight, nerves thrumming through their veins.

Corroded Coffin had worked their asses off to be here. Broke bar tours in the Midwest, trying to slip in original songs when they could but still keep people entertained. Broke bar tours on the west coast when Steve bought an RV that he let them use from September to November and February to May. Then a record label signing them only to find out they expected them to change their entire sound and tour the entire east coast for four months, right when the kids were graduating high school. The band agreed they had to find a way out. Luckily, Steve’s mom was one of the best lawyers around and kind of owed him for just being a shitty mom, and she managed to find a loophole in their contract that got them out without having to pay anything except a small studio fee for when they recorded a song.

But things turned around quickly for them after that.

A record company saw them perform in Indy, said they loved that they were a “listener friendly heavy metal”, wanted them to make an album and tour all summer.

They agreed.

The first album took off in ways no one could’ve expected. They were in magazines and newspapers, on late night shows, and performing in places Eddie could’ve only dreamed of.

The second album went even better.

This third album, though. It was different.

The guys called it his love letter to Steve, so they had every right to say they didn’t want to record it or perform it, but they did. It was still their sound, still rock, but the lyrics were about yearning for the person who wanted you most, and being proud of the people you were together, and loving someone who’d never been loved right.

It was disgustingly romantic, but because there were amazing guitar solos and drums, they maintained their street cred in the rock family.

Steve cried for hours the first time he listened to it, and when it was done, he proposed to Eddie.

But Eddie’s plan all along was to propose to Steve after he listened to the album, so while Steve was down on one knee, tears still falling from his eyes, Eddie dropped to one knee too.

They’ve worn matching silver bands on their ring fingers since, but no one seems to have noticed.

In all fairness, Eddie wears a lot of rings, a lot of jewelry. It’s not immediately obvious unless you see his hands every day.

So this album meant a lot to him and to Steve. When they got news of the nomination, they cried and then Eddie fucked Steve for six hours straight, which shouldn’t have been possible, but through the adrenaline of being nominated for a Grammy, all things are possible.

Now they were here, being forced to keep some distance because they’d all agreed he couldn’t be out yet, couldn’t say who this album was about even though they get asked in every interview.

He maintains the mystery and it kills him.

He knows it kills Steve too.

“Corroded Coffin with their album, ‘Into Battle With You’!”

Everyone at their table was jumping up and yelling excitedly, and Eddie could barely breathe. He desperately wanted to kiss Steve, but he knew he had to wait.

He felt Steve’s eyes on him the entire walk to the stage with his boys, the whole speech he gave, and the whole walk backstage.

The post-interview process was annoying, especially when they all just wanted to get back to their dates, but it had to be done.

Pictures were taken, hugs were given, and they were finally given the chance to go back to their table.

“Dude, how did we beat Metallica? This feels like a dream,” Jeff asked, eyes still a bit wide in disbelief.

“Don’t question it, they might reconsider,” Gareth threw in.

Eddie was laser focused on sitting down at the table to talk to Steve, even if they had to have distance between them.

But when they got to the table, Steve was gone.

Eddie tried not to panic. Maybe he needed to use the restroom and thought Eddie would be longer.

But five minutes passed and he still wasn’t back. He turned to the guy who’d spoken to him earlier.

“Hey, have you seen my assistant?”

“Yeah, he said he had to get some air.”

“Thanks.”

Eddie wasn’t even thinking when he stood up and made his way outside, their manager whisper shouting at him to sit down.

Steve was more important.

It took too long to get outside, guests and press and guards congratulating him the whole way out. They had blocked off the side exit for everyone to leave later, made sure the side road was secure and only approved vehicles got through. Steve was probably here somewhere.

But he wasn’t. Eddie started to panic.

He walked up to the valet to ask if he’d seen him. He hadn’t.

Then he walked up to a guard by the end of the road. He hadn’t seen him either.

Maybe they missed each other somehow, maybe he’d gone back inside and there were too many people to see Eddie coming outside.

But as he looked across the road at a diner that somehow still remained on this strip of fancy dining and coffee shops, he saw him.

He was sitting at a table with a milkshake in front of him. Two straws.

Eddie bit his lip to keep from crying.

Back in Hawkins, they weren’t able to really go on dates. Robin would sometimes third wheel just so they would be less suspicious, but it was awkward. But at the diner, they could get a booth in the back, share a milkshake, and no one would see or question it if Steve’s hand slipped across the table to run his fingers across Eddie’s arm.

Eddie ran to the diner, he had to be with Steve right now.

When he walked up to the table, Steve smiled up at him.

“Got your favorite,” he said, gesturing for Eddie to sit across from him.

So Eddie did, because if Steve wanted him, he had him.

That’s how it’s been for years, that’s how it always would be.

Steve reached a hand over to run his fingers over his arm, smiling at him fondly.

“I’m proud of you, Eds. So proud.”

Eddie wasn’t going to cry.

But the way Steve was looking at him, he couldn’t hold back the tears.

They sat like that, enjoying their milkshake, for probably longer than they should have.

Out of the corner of his eye, he could see people slowly leaving the awards, rushing into vehicles, not paying attention to the diner across the street.

But eventually, they knew they needed to go, needed to find the guys so they knew they were safe.

Eddie went up to the counter, felt Steve’s eyes on him the whole time.

“All set?” The woman behind the register asked with a smile.

“Yes ma’am.”

“That’ll be $2.50.”

Eddie handed her a $20 bill and told her to keep the change, pay for someone else’s bill if she felt like it, and she nodded.

“You know, that boy must love you a whole lot to be lookin’ at you like that.”

“Hm?” Eddie asked as he turned to see Steve watching him with a content grin. “Oh. Yeah, he’s obsessed with me.”

The woman smirked.

“And you?”

“Oh, I’m so obsessed with him, I wrote an entire album about him. Just won an award for my obsession.”

“Good. You take care of each other.”

“Yes ma’am.”

Eddie walked over to the table to help Steve up, but separated again before they walked outside to join the now heavier crowd waiting for their cars.

———

The next day, the news was focused on all the Grammy winners, Corroded Coffin among them. Steve proudly read aloud from the newspaper delivered to their hotel room, standing up completely naked and reading it theatrically.

But when he got towards the end, he froze.

His brows furrowed and the line in his forehead got bigger.

“What is it, sweetheart?”

“There’s a picture of us. At the diner.”

“Oh?”

“We look…”

Eddie walked over to see what he was talking about.

Even in the blurry black and white newspaper image, you could see the love between them. It would be impossible to deny what was going on there.

Eddie smiled and leaned in to kiss the corner of Steve’s mouth.

“Alright?”

Steve looked at him, searching his face for any sign of panic, smiling when he didn’t find any.

“Perfect. This is perfect.”

[gtzel]

Winter and Claus (title TBD)

Chapter 5

first/previous/next

Winter sat awkwardly, looking down at his bandaged hands where they sat stiffly. His throat felt raw from all of the crying he had done the night before. His body ached everywhere as he sat on the plush surface. His mind wandered aimlessly, thinking about his house in the walls and how he longed to return to the cozy place. Yeah it wasn’t neat and tidy like the human’s house, and sure he didn’t always have a steady food supply, but at least there he was safe, free. 

The borrower looked up sadly to the human who had occupied himself with rearranging the colored pencils into rainbow order, a task that Winter found silly. What was the point of such a task? Was this human so completely privileged that the color organization of his pencils was something to fret over? 

Winter scoffed quietly to himself, deciding not to jab at the humans odd habits, I wasn’t worth the risk of getting hurt again. 

“Uhm….” Winter muttered quietly, hoping the human would look up. Claus’s eyes met Winters but his posture remained the same as he continued his task. “M-may I have something to drink?” He said eyes diverting, feeling the scrutinizing gaze he was under. 

The human nodded and got up to leave. Once he left Winter relaxed, letting out a breath he had been unconsciously holding in. Claus was…strange, not like any other human that Winter had seen. Of course this may have been because this was the first human who Winter had actually *met*. Winter frowned at the thought. 

This human didn’t make any sense, he had acted concerned when Winter had first been coming into consciousness, but after what winter thought to be a good ice breaking conversation he clammed up and preoccupied himself with menial tasks. Now he acted like he first had, closed off and cold. At least he wasn’t manhandling Winter like before, but it was unnerving and frankly just weird now. 

Winter assumed he wouldn’t be let go, based on the humans past words and actions. His hope was to gain the human’s trust enough to be allowed to leave, and then hope to move away. But then Claus shut winter out the second that he had started to see a semi decent side of the human. 

The door to the humans room opened and Claus walked back in with a plastic water bottle in hand. He slumped down into the chair in front of winter and opened the bottle, using the cap of it as a bowl and poured water into it, setting it down next to the bedridden borrower. 

Winter looked at it, mentally calculating how he would pick it up with his injured hands. 

After a moment the human spoke with an unreadable tone “a-aren’t you going to like…drink?” He muttered, a crack of concern on his face suddenly masked with the usual RBF. 

Winter’s face grew red with fluster. “I-i can’t” *dumbass* he mentally added. He lifted his hands up to show their bandaged state.

the momentary jab of confidence that Winter had felt immediately dropped to fear as the human’s hand appeared inches from his face. A sharp whimper escaped winter as he held his arms guarding his head bracingly, before realizing the human had the bottle cap pinched between two fingers 

“O-oh-“ winter muttered as he sat up, trembling as he lowered his head into the water, grey eyes flashing up momentarily to be sure of the humans intentions before drinking. The water was refreshing, quenching the borrower's ravenous thirst. His sore throat was soothed by the refreshing ice water.  

He pulled away, and Claus took that as his queue to pull away “t-thank you” winter muttered, still shaken from the proximity. The borrower curled his legs to his chest and allowed his chin to rest on his knees. 

The human chewed on his bottom lip before awkwardly attempting to give a friendly smile. Winter seemed to unclench at the human’s pathetic attempt to seem non threatening. Maybe he wasn’t so bad. 

The silence was deafening, winter didn’t know what to say, or do. He just sat there, awkward as ever as the human continued his task from before, not-so-subtly glancing up at winter with more curiosity this time. 

Claus cleared his throat “so…uhm….” He racked his brain for conversation starters, and of course his brain gave him the worst prompt “why were you looking at my homework?” 

Winter whimpered and looked down, remembering their first meeting. Could it even be called a meeting? For winter it was the most traumatic event of his life. He cleared his throat and muttered out ”i-uh…i thought it was interesting…”

claus’s face scrunched up with distaste, and winter flinched back, thinking he had angered the human. Maybe it was the kind of action humans looked down upon. After all, humans got offended at the strangest things. Winter had noticed the man of the house- claus’s father- often got angry when a certain finger was shown to him, and he spoke specific words that apparently had more significance than the others. 

“How can you think the California gold rush is interesting?” Claus said with an incredulatory tone, snapping Winter out of his momentary train of thought. 

Winter assumed that was what the writing topic had been about “i-uh” he felt shame, like he wasn’t supposed to enjoy the topic “i do like it…i dont get to read very often so…so i thought it was interesting” he mumbled.

claus looked down at the borrower, a twinge of guilt hiding under his indifferent expression. “Oh” he said awkwardly “uh..well i can tell you more about it…i-if your really that invested” he offered, averting his gaze. 

Winter looked up and, for the first time since meeting the human, smiled “y-yeah I would really enjoy that” 

The human looked down, lips parting slightly in awe at the adorable smile that had graced the borrower's face. A light pink dusted Claus's cheeks as his eyes widened. He jolted, clearing his throat as he stood up and shuffled around in his backpack “o-okay then” he muttered, tone gruff.

He sat back down in front of winter. The borrower noticed a small crease on the human’s face, like he was restraining a smile. The thought that the human might just be shy and socially awkward relieved winter. Dealing wit a socially awkward human was far better and more appealing than trying to deal with an angry cold human. Winter internally prayed that the human would keep this up and actually show emotions, but only time could tell. 

Claus flipped through his notebook and found the page. He softly began to read to the borrower, stopping occasionally to explain little parts that winter didn’t understand. Something about just sitting there, together reading, it seemed so natural. The human had softened his posture, expression less guarded as he read. 

Winter seemed to perk up more, asking questions and loosening his stance. He even scooted closer to see the pictures in the book, fascinated. His silvery grey eyes glimmered with curiosity as the mood improved. 

In the middle of one of Claus’s explanations, a shout rang out from downstairs. Claus winced. “-ah- hold on one sec” he muttered, tone slightly wavering. The human walked over to his door and peeked through it, then jolted back and shut it, clicking the lock shut. 

When he sat back down, winter noticed the subtle tremble in the humans hands, and a bead of sweat trickled along his neck. The human took a shaky breath “w-where were we?” He gulped nervously.

winter’s brow furrowed in confusion “uhm…the people set up camp along the river…” he muttered then spoke up “c-Claus are you…okay?” He asked, timidly looking up. He jolted in surprise when he noticed the humans violet gold eyed glossy with tears, his lip trembling. 

Claus seemed to snap out of whatever mood he was in, jolting away from the borrower. “I-ah” he whimpered as he rubbed the tears from his eyes, looking away. Winter noticed the human’s face had turned bright red and his breathing shaky. 

Winter didn’t really know what to do, he had never seen a human, or anyone really, in this kind of state. He froze up, trying to think of what he would want in this position “uh…d-do you want to tal-“ 

“no” Claus sad, a sharp tone cutting winter off. From what the borrower could gather, the human was bottling up his feelings. And winter had experience with doing that himself.

“Are-are you sure?” Winter asked, concerned. Hah, what a thought. He was concerned for the creature who he had been trained to fear for his whole life. How ironic. 

“Just-just go…Go Away!” Claus said, his voice breaking with the obvious pain and confliction he was dealing with. 

Winter stepped closer “Claus i-“ 

“Just GO AWAY!” The human shouted, loud enough to make the borrower shrink back, whimpering. The shout was enough to make winter give in to his own fear and flee. He ran back to the edge of the human's desk, shocked but glad that his hook still remained intact. 

He looked back at Claus one last time before hooking the clasp to his harness and grappling down to safety.

[satosugusandwich]

𝔏𝔢𝔱 𝔐𝔢 𝔖𝔢𝔢 𝔜𝔬𝔲’𝔯𝔢 𝔐𝔢𝔞𝔫…

True Form!Sukuna x Fem!Afab!Reader (This is an AU!!! Sukuna is not a homicidal maniac cannibalistic murderer! I think he’s sexy and my morals say no dick from crazy murderer BUT dick from crazy 😍)

Cw: very brief mention of trauma, sukuna is an ass, alcohol, mild sexual content but no smut just yet

Description: You've been friends with Yuji Itadori for some time now and have seen the best, the worst, and the strange in all your years of knowing him. You've never thought he was one to have any crazy secrets and well... you were wrong. And now the demon bound to Yuji is bound to you too! How fun! Good thing that you aren't stupid and won't fall for a being that by no means should you have ever interacted with! Right? Right...?

*Yuji is aged up but there will be no sexual stuff with him except maybe like a brief mention but yeah*

Chapter 3 Here!

@dressycobra7

Chapter 4: Quite the Teacher

You did your best to avoid Sukuna most of the time after that and eventually Yuji left your apartment to pick up a few changes of clothes, so you were left alone with Sukuna again. Sukuna was an enigma to you and you to him. Before you could interact with Sukuna, he'd have to watch you through Yuji even though most of the time he did his best to stay away from Yuji. When Sukuna was first reawakened, he was obsessed with fucking around with Itadori and pushing his buttons, but Yuji was far too stubborn to break so eventually Sukuna gave up. Now, he has the perfect opportunity to get quality entertainment but of course he's stuck with an overly sensitive human that has spent the past few days crying or eating. Its no fun when he can't get a reaction out of them, you'd break too fast for his liking. Yuji doesn't break at all, in fact, each time Sukuna pisses off Yuji, he mostly ignores him.

After a few days, you decided you would go to class even if you didn't want to. Yuji agreed that it was good for the sake of normalcy and explained not to worry about Sukuna because he'd most sleep on the ground somewhere or lay down his seats in the car. So long as Sukuna chooses to follow Yuji around, he won't have to be stuck with you. And yet... here he is, staring over your shoulder while you try to listen to the lecture. It felt so awkward having Sukuna hovering above you, just standing to your left while no one else can see him. You have no idea why he decided you'd be the best to follow and you weren't very flattered by it. It took everything for you to not react. The professor would keep talking and then Sukuna would make some side comment about the information he's trying to teach or make a comment about what one of the other students is doing. It didn't help if they were funny and you had to do the most not to laugh.

The monster has always been attentive, things would catch his eye that no one else would from his hundreds of years worth of battle experience. Humans have always had interesting habits to him, some that were entertaining and others that were plain annoying. For example, in the show he was watching, there were humans that were fond of being suspended in intricate patterns and tortured pleasurably which seemed counterintuitive to the human urge to survive. On the other hand, there were more annoying habits, like the humans that obsessed over adjusting their clothing to always look a certain way, as if others' opinions made them so insecure it was palpable. To him, if another judges, why not just show them to mind their own business? Sadly, you were one of those that seemed preoccupied with others views of you. And one that was too timid to tell others to mind their business.

You got up to go to the bathroom and he followed behind you. "Hey," you said once you were out the door, "can you stand further away from me? Or like teleport to Yuji or something?"

With his observational skills, he could tell you were uncomfortable with him watching you, as much as you initially tried to hide it. "Why can't I stand next to you?"

"It feels weird! You keep on staring at me!" You entered the bathroom and shut the door behind you.

"Weren't you staring at me all day yesterday?" He said through the door.

Your face got hot, but not in embarrassment, more so frustration. You really didn't want to leave class as boring as it was, you just wanted to be isolated from Sukuna from a moment and especially his peering eyes. Sukuna wanted to push you as much as he also wanted to know how your brain works, frustratedly his only choice was to stalk you. (It is not his only choice, he’s not good at asking questions.)

When you exited the bathroom, you came face to face with him and you couldn’t help but look into his eyes, you’d never seen real life red eyes before, and never this many on one face. Sukuna didn’t make any comments about your staring but it certainly amused him whether or not he’d admit it. You looked away and started to walk back to class, but this time he decided to sit outside of the room and rest on two of his arms.

Once you reached the end of the day, you were reunited with Yuji which you were beyond grateful for. You have no fucking idea how he tolerates having Sukuna with him at all time or at least in proximity. You can practically have zero privacy unless a door is between you! And did Sukuna watch him as much as he watches you???? You assumed he had just gotten used to it over time and you sincerely hoped you would too. You really hadn’t chewed on the fact that you’re actually stuck with him for life and you wondered if Yuji had accepted that as well. Did Sukuna?

Yuji suggested going to get some drinks tonight, a little pick me up to get you out of your head and while you originally opposed the idea, you decided maybe it’ll take your mind off the trauma and Sukuna. Before that, the three of you went to your place and you slept for nearly the whole day before you sat back to do work, which helped to bring you back into your body and not your thoughts. Then it was 8pm.

You wanted to go out at a seemingly normal time and just throw back a few in peace and maybe talk to a few people while you were at it. Since you all decided to ride in your car, Sukuna was lucky enough to have ample space for once. You didn’t know if he really wanted to follow you around or if the binding made it so that he couldn’t leave either of your sides and Yuji was also wondering the same thing, he just didn’t want to stir the pot. When you arrived at this cute little bar, you were met with Megumi, Yuji’s boyfriend.

“Hey!” You ran up to the man sat at the bar. “I haven’t seen you in a little bit!”

Megumi smiled and waved while Yuji placed a kiss to his cheek. “Yeah, I’m back in town. I visited my sister for a few days.”

Yuji sat down beside him. “I’m so happy to see you!!!” He was ecstatic, grinning from ear to ear. Looking at the boys, they seemed like opposites. Yuji being a super jubilant, bright eyed, pink haired, and muscular dude versus Megumi being a somber, dark eyed, dark haired, more athletic build. It was charming to you, but clearly, the touchy feely stuff made Sukuna groan. He sounded like a grossed out kid.

“I already ordered some shots.” Megumi said. “I know Yuji and Nobara would down them super fast.”

The name made your eyes light up. “Oh is she coming?” You loved when she was around since you were able to complain about men together.

Megumi nodded. “She’s in the bathroom, we came together.”

Sure enough, she was out as soon as he said that, pulling her tube top up and running to you. You outstretched your arms to hug her as if you hadn’t seen her in ages and, of course, another groan from Sukuna. Nobara started pattering on, telling you all about the past few weeks and why she hasn’t been around as much. You kept on giggling and it was like you forgot Sukuna was there. the demon had found his way to a corner and opted to people watch while you continued to bore him. He was still attentive to you, wondering how long he was going to be stuck here watching you all.

Over the past few years of watching Itadori, he learned to find ways to entertain himself, be it creating stories in his mind or thinking about his life. When he felt the urge to mess with people, considering he was able to interact with objects, he loved giving people a spook. One thing he will miss is constantly spooking you, now that you’re aware of his presence, it’ll be much harder. A poor dude decided to turn his back so Sukuna shifted his drink over to the other end of the table. The man didn’t notice it at first, so he did it again. The second time had the man blinking and looking around like crazy. Then Sukuna saw that someone left their keys on the table so naturally, he took them and hid them on the floor under the table. Then of course, he went into the bathrooms and decided to shake the stall doors. Well populated places like this were his favorite outings, he could fuck with whatever he’d like, especially because Yuji couldn’t lecture him without looking like he’s insane.

Sukuna’s acts didn’t go unnoticed by you and as you watched him you realized that a lot of the shit you went through with Yuji was Sukuna’s fault! Oh yeah, when this alcohol induced confidence kicks in, you’re going for his ass.

Nobara noticed that you were downing a million drinks so she put her hand on your shoulder. “Hey, you tryna get dicked down tonight or did something happen?”

You nearly choked on your drink. “Listen, liiiisteeen.” You stretched the second word and slammed your drink down. “I am never letting a man even think about my vagina ever again!”

Nobara put her hands up. “Oh? Finally gave up, huh?”

You scoffed. “Gave up??? Nah, I learned that none of them are worth it! I’ve decided that the next man I fuck will have to eat it first, kiss it too! And also he needs to walk the walk as much as he talks. Each dick I’ve been near recently has just been god awful.” You couldn’t help but rant while she looked at you with wide eyes.

“Yeah, for real. It’s only right they get you to nut first!” She agreed, slamming back another. “There’s this guy they’ve been talking about you know. He’s a little bit older but not too much, but they say he eats like he’s starved.” She licked her lips and nudged you.

“I need proof!”

She pulled on your arm. “It’s rumors for sure, but he’s really fucking hot.” Pulling out her phone, she opened up Instagram and showed you his account.

“Oh my fuck—“ you gaped. “His hair!!! His eyes!!!!!” It’s true. He’s tall as fuck, has Snow White hair, bright blue eyes, and is built not as much as Sukuna, but built. Not to mention his cocky grin and how his sunglasses sit on the end of his nose. “But he’s one of those guys who knows they’re hot, those guys are red flags!”

She shushed you. “Listen, y/n, he’s totally your type. You’re more in his age range and he supposedly likes girls like you. You should DM him!”

You thought on it for a minute, you are a few years older than your friends and even if he’s a bit older, he’s got a good reputation. Scrolling through his account, he’s sexy as hell, has sexy friends, and frequents this same bar. She must’ve heard about him from the other girls here. “Who is the other guy here?”

Nobara tapped on the image and went to his account. “Oh yeah, he’s the darker type. Suguru and Satoru, funny.” She read their names and you looked at both of them. That’s one hell of a threesome idea.

“You like those kinds of men?” Sukuna’s voice boomed behind you.

You turned around fast but then remembered no one else can hear or see him, except Yuji. “Oh.” You turned back around and Nobara lifted a brow.

“What’s up?” She asked, peering behind her to see what you were looking at.

“It’s nothing.” You responded, now looking up the men on Instagram.

Sukuna spoke again. “They seem to be rather proud of themselves. From my experience, they break the hardest.”

You tried to not talk back, but the alcohol was definitely making your temper rise. Yuji was an expert at drowning out Sukuna at this point so he didn’t even notice your distress, not to mention the alcohol and his pretty boyfriend had his attention more than you. Sukuna, for once, hadn’t picked up on it either.

“Hey, I’ll be right back.”

Now Itadori was looking at you. “Are you okay?”

You nodded. “Yeah, just gotta get something really fast.”

Nobara grabbed your arm. “I’ll come with it’s not safe.”

You pushed away your hand. “It’s fine, I’ll be safe.” That’s true, you could just tell Sukuna to save you. You exited the bar and when you got to your car, you looked around to make sure no one was there and sure enough, Sukuna decided to follow you.

“Hm, did I irritate you?” He looked slightly amused.

You did not. “Yes! You won’t shut the fuck up!” You were pissed now, arms crossed and looking at him like he’s crazy.

“Oho? You do have some fire, huh?” He was grinning now, both pairs of arms crossed.

“You’ve been an ass to me since we’ve met and I’ve been beyond nice to you! It’s like all you want to do is piss me off, Yuji too! I literally just went through the most traumatizing experience of my fucking life and now you’re being an asshole to me! Watching me, making comments about the dudes I like, and being an absolute shithead!”

As you yelled at him, his face softened a bit. He let you rant at him before speaking up. “I’m impressed you’re willing to speak to me like this. You have more to you than I thought.”

Ouch, there he goes again. “What the fuck! I just told you about your shitty comments—“

“It was a compliment.” He interjected. “Personally, I love it when people don’t hold back.”

You didn’t know what to say. It’s like he was missing the entire point. “I shouldn’t have said anything.��� You started to walk toward the bar, ready to drink some more.

“No, you should say more. Tell each person that’s hurt you to shut the fuck up. Like you did me.” He was grinning again and you stopped walking, looking toward the ground. “I’m being serious. I seriously don’t intend or have intended to hurt you, I just think you need to speak your mind more, raw emotion and boldness looks good on you.”

Spinning around to face him again, you could feel your throat tightening. He looked… genuine. “Were you trying to piss me off on purpose?”

Sukuna shook his head, pushing out his lower lip. “I’ve been told I push buttons, past and present. I must admit,” he laughed, “I love to tease.”

“So you were trying to piss me off?”

He laughed a bit harder. “No, no, I’ve been holding back. It’s not fun to kick someone when they’re down. I think I’m starting to find you more interesting, so I especially wouldn’t do that.”

He finds you interesting? What the hell does that mean? “So you thought I was boring, me?”

He cocked his head. “You and the brat are stupid so you’re entertaining, but watching you these past two days have made me realize something.”

You narrowed you eyes.

“You have a fire, it just needs a little push. Luckily, I’m quite the teacher.” One of his hands went to his chest as though he was crossing his heart. “Keep stoking that fire, brat, it’s quite entertaining.”

You didn’t know what to say, so you just went back inside. Everyone was confused but you decided to ignore it and drink up a little more. If one good thing came out of tonight, that was you forgetting all about the previous nights. Now, you can’t get Sukuna’s words out of your head. Hell, it’s the only thing you thought about, so you went and forgot to do your homework. And also forgot to eat dinner.

It was 1am when you all decided to leave and you were passed the fuck out so Yuji had to carry you and strap you into the passengers seat. Really, he shouldn’t be driving either, but he’s not stupid enough to give Sukuna the wheel even though he offered with a shit-eating grin on his face. Yeah, less worried about his driving skills and more due to the fact that it’d look like a ghost driving the two of you. Yuji went inside with you and tried to wake you up to shower and change, but you opted to remain sleeping. After your argument (one-sided), Sukuna couldn’t help but feel bad. He’s not one to be exceptionally emotional, but he’s been seriously trying to give you advice, he isn’t used to being around normal people, he used to those who grin and bear it for the sake of strength and power, not people who actually feel their emotions. He’s not one to have a soft spot, but something about you evokes emotions he once tried to fully repress for the sake of survival. He doesn’t get it. At all.

You don’t get it either.

Why exactly that night, for the first time since it had happened, why you didn’t have nightmares. And why, instead of dreaming about the two men on instagram, you dreamt of Sukuna lapping at your clit. And also why did you like it so much?

[awaitinganorphanera]

HI HEY NICE TO MEET YOU DO YOU HAVE ANY FIC RECS??? (ao3 or any platform actually)

K WOW, It's been a while since I get to answer any inbox questions so IM SO SORRY IF IT TOOK FOREVER FOR ME TO RESPOND ajshjashjash now I'm under the assumption that you're asking for CobyMeppo fanfics specifically?? if I'm wrong im so sorry 😭, but considering how you're asking me and considering how majority of the content that I post on here is exactly CobyMeppo driven then- I'll take it as a yes Well getting things straight then, I'll be breaking down the fics I'm recommending into two (with an additional third uwu) categories, with one being just shippy CobyMeppo romantic stuff and the other not necessarily shippy but implied and/or platonic ones because GOD i have an incredibly unhealthy attachment to these two

OK SO HERE WE GO

Coby/Helmeppo Fanfics on Ao3 I absolutely adore recommend (all of which are on ao3 <33):

1.) Non smut (yes this is classification i’m adding)

Words On Skin by marineduo (spiralxshock)  - The basic premise of this is that it’s set in a modern au, where Helmeppo is a tattoo artist and Koby is a hopeless romantic writer, sadly it isn't complete but goodness it's such a cute and short read 😭

To See You Smile by DamianFinch2 (DamianFinch) - Jealous and possessive Helmeppo + gushing and crushing Koby. This fic is an adorable and angst one shot, with it holding one of my favorite dynamics being  - Its short and a bit saddening for Helmeppo, but it's a commonality in the CobyMeppo community to make Helmeppo miserable 😊

Optics by The_Storybooker &

Choices by Ricky4479 - GOD I LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE THESE TWO FICS, ESPECIALLY OPTICS. I just absolutely adore works that focuses on Helmeppos past and what he’s gone through, with him almost always trying his best to deny his feelings for Koby its just- F—

Expression by Eloarei - This one is just an adorable one shot with Koby being an insecure flustered mess as Meppo acts all smug with him, some of these fics are more OPLA based, which I honestly prefer since the way the Netflix l.a personalized Helmeppos smugness to be more endearing and less irritating is something i’ll never get over with.

Pressure Treated by Anonymous  - Fics that tackle the Trans!Koby au is just so endearing to me, it's absolutely heartbreaking especially when it writes abt the gender dysphoria and crisis one feels. Helmeppo comforts Koby in this, it's heartwarming.

Careless Whisper by coralnebulas - More Trans!Koby but less angsty and more adorable and funny! Koby and Helmeppo are absolute dorks in this fic and it's so aishjasjsag

Rinse and Repeat by battybatzgirl - Helmeppo acting like a tsundere and denying his feelings for Koby, part 7267352. But yeah! It's short and cute and the characterization, humor, and writing from this author is phenomenal. 2.) MMM SMEXY STEAMY S E X

Helping Hands by leghair - Koby requests a body massage :)

Insomnia for Daddy's Boys With Repressed Feelings for Their Cute Best Friend by Xenophile45 - Meppo tries to sleep and get over his identity crisis and gnawing thoughts by letting one out for his friend 

midnight habits by battybatzgirl - Meppo tries to sleep and get over his identity crisis and gnawing thoughts by watching his friend let one out

Of shirts, sheets and new haircuts by River1848 - Meppo tries to live normally and ignore his developing feelings for Koby, lets one out for his friend and gets caught. Said friend proceeds to comfort the poor guy

all tied up and fine print by battybatzgirl - These smut fics specifically are so unique and intensely ingrained into my mind - Actually, just read all the authors works, genuinely, every single OP fanfic they write is phenomenal including their Kobylu and platonic Coby Meppo content. There's a lot from them I haven't mentioned but a lot of which are Koby centric ajijassaksaj

To be needed in times of war by RainbowNixie  - Ok, this one is NOT necessarily purely CobyMeppo, this is a Coby/Hibari/Helmeppo fic (WOO POLYAMORY) and is only read if u enjoy multi shipping or are ok with this. I do still recommend it though cuz it's amazingly written and the characterization of Helmeppo and Hibari here is so cute. - But srsly, to get into more detail, I genuinely would want anyone who's interested to check it out. This this this this is such an underrated but amazingly written fic, with the story revolving around Hibari and Helmeppo relationship dynamic w/ each other in the context of a Coby/Helmeppo/Hibari being in a polyamorous relationship. The fic focuses on Helmeppo and Hibaris doubts and feelings (SO MUCH FEELINGS) on their love and just utter care and worry for Coby. 

3.) Coby & Helmeppo fics on Ao3 I adore and recommend (platonic/ only implied romance):

a pawsitively bad day by battybatzgirl - Did i mention to read this author - Koby turns into a cat :D

in my mind like a song (in my head like a zombie) by Glitter_Lisp - It's a Modern au w/ Trans!Koby being siblings w/ sanji, him and Meppo got into a fight but make up cutely in the end

Pink by fireontheriver - A short and wholesome one shot, with Helmeppo comforting and providing platonic intimacy and affection to Koby after the events of marineford

Constructive Dismissal by Senna_B - Modern au that ships Koby with X drake, with Platonic cobymeppo being its focus.  - This one is honestly a nice read, mostly taking on Helmeppo’s pov and showcasing his feelings of inadequacy to his best friend. The characterization and writing once again is glorious, authors other works are highly recommended

As Bright as the Stars by your_dragon_just_shot_at_me - A chapter by chapter Plotty CobyMeppo adventure where they essentially just frolic around but with ✨mystery✨

Mirror by MatoMasaharu - insecure Koby overthinks and tries to stay tough as Helmeppo gets concerned in the sidelines

Hints and Glimpses by Senna_B - Probably one of my favorite coby and helmeppo centered fics that does a fantastic job in writing their friendship and dynamic, with it being a great one-shot story with an AMAZING plot regarding fortune telling and future events. Gosh the writing of their relationship, their friendship, the foreshadowing, the plot????? Good lord i ate this shit with a huge ass smile

friction burn by miswriting (m_is_writing) - MY ABSOLUTELY FAVORITE PLATONIC COBYMEPPO FANFICTION I REREAD AN UNHEALTHY AMOUNT OF TIMES!! - ITS AN A/B/O AU FIC WITH AN AMAZING MIX OF FLUFF AND ANGST, THE AMOUNT OF PHYSICAL AFFECTION AND CARE AND PERSONALITY THIS HAS IN THIS MAKES ME RAPID

OK, LASTLY, JUST LASTLY, THE FIC THAT WILL FOREVER BE MY FAVORITE, LIKE GENUINELY FAVORITE COBYMEPPO FANFIC EVER, THE FIC RESPONSIBLE TO MY HYPERFIXATION ON IT, THE ONE THAT MADE ME DECIDE TO START THE GETTING INTO THESE TWO AND LOW-KEY PUSHED ME TO FR START THE ANIME AFTER HAVING WATCHED THE LIVE ACTION:

birdsong and seafoam by literatureonhowtolose - Ok, now I know I might be overhyping a Fic up, and by all means, I most definitely am. I don’t promise that this would be any CobyMeppo fans favorite too, but it's just something that I genuinely, truly, adore and remember whenever this ship comes to mind. - Its ironic I think, that my favorite cobymeppo fic is the only fic in this list that isnt even focused on cobymeppo, and being one of the shortest - The thing I probably most liked about this fic is the writing. How much it managed to express and characterize Helmeppo and describe his thoughts with not much words. I’ll never get tired of rereading it

[rangosmango7]

started maybe writing a drarry fic but it’s just a culmination of a bunch of fluffy, sad ideas at the moment, but here’s a cute little scene

Draco and Teddy feels:

Wedged in between an abandoned ice cream parlor and a post office was a small brick storefront, framed by climbing roses and showcasing various mis-matched, antique objects through the front windows.

All Draco saw was a warm light and a shield from the oncoming storm– then all he saw was Teddy Lupin, peeking up from behind that old wooden countertop and surrounded by millions of antiques covered in years of dust.

It took a second, of course, for Draco to fully register the fact that those gray-blue eyes were an exact replica of his own, and he blinked a few times when, for hardly a millisecond, the curls on the top of that small head flashed platinum before returning to their natural turquoise hue.

Draco finally steps inside after a moment, his brow furrowing as he hesitantly watches the small boy scramble off of whatever stool he had currently been perched upon. His eyes widen slowly as Teddy, quite determinedly, walks right up to him.

He’s dressed in a blue and green striped sweater with denim overalls; there’s a bright blue pin on the front pocket that says “Assistant Manager” and mismatched socks peeking from the top of the worn muggle sneakers on his small feet.

The boy gestures to their right, drawing Draco’s attention to a shelf full of antique decanters in a myriad of different colors, “These a-are new— Haz says they’re hand-ade,” Teddy says informatively, staring up at Draco with bright eyes, and if Draco weren’t overwhelmed by the sheer volume of things in this enclosed space and the presence of his estranged cousin in a muggle resale shop, he’d find Teddy’s breathless stutter dreadfully endearing.

“Ah— handmade, you say?” Draco asks after a few awkward moments, finding himself at a loss and just barely stopping himself from running right back out the door.

The second he’d laid eyes on the boy, the first feeling to wash over him was pure shock— the second was pure shame.

His mother spoke of her sister, Andromeda, often. Never in front of his grandparents or Lucius, but when they were by the fire, just the two of them, late at night. His mother would stare off into the fire and he would ask— he always asks what’s wrong.

She would smile, so, so sadly, and tell him stories about Andromeda. Once, with a wave of her hand, she conjured the night sky, moving her hand over the Andromeda Galaxy with reverence. How bright, how damned beautiful was her sister? So encompassing and lovely, was her sister.

He’d never met Andromeda, nor her daughter, but he had met Remus Lupin. He’d met Remus Lupin and he’d said horrible things about the werewolf; about Teddy’s father. Teddy Lupin, his own blood, left without parents because they died so that he and the rest of the world could continue on.

Teddy’s parents who would undoubtedly hate Draco, who wouldn’t want any part of his life touching Teddy’s, because Draco Malfoy was— is— an entitled, bigoted Death Eater, and hadn’t spared a thought for Andromeda nor her orphaned grandson after the war.

The shame soaked through him deeper than the downpour did, but he found himself stuck in place.

He’s learned something new, today; it’s quite difficult to turn down the conversation of a bright, happy Teddy Lupin while he beams up at you, straightening his spine and puffing out his chest pridefully at the opportunity to inform you about antique muggle decanters.

Teddy nods enthusiastically, grinning wide, “Yes! Haz says they’re from the eight-teeth century, and not to touch them because when I touch glass things the-ey break, so I don’t touch them— but I think he would let you! I don’t think you break things yo-ou touch.”

And, wow, wasn’t that just a punch to the gut he wasn’t expecting this morning.

“I’m afraid we have the same habit of breaking things,” Draco says dejectedly, flashing Teddy a small smile before actually getting a good look at his surroundings.

The store, while seeming rather small from the outside, is full to the brim with all sorts of objects. The walls are lined with bookcases, chipped wardrobes and various posters, signs and paintings. There are shelves sticking out from the walls and the odd piece of furniture, creating a haphazard maze, of sorts, that seems to extend so far back that Draco isn’t sure exactly where it ends— if it ends. He suspects some sort of (illegal) extension charm and his brows furrow further.

There are tea sets and glass lamps and VHS tapes and muggle cameras and clothes. Draco isn’t exactly sure how anyone could ever manage to navigate this mess— it doesn’t matter, though, because he isn’t planning on staying long, really; only until the rain stops it’s assault on London.

Teddy seems to be able to navigate the mess just fine as he takes Draco’s hand, leading him further and further into the maze.

They stop in front of what Draco gathers is one of those muggle record players— Granger has one in her small cottage, and Draco had gotten several lectures on how delicate the black discs are, having been on the receiving end of many “don’t touch the needle!”s and “you’re as bad as a toddler!”s every time he attempted to use the damned thing.

Teddy picks up a record from one of the surrounding crates and holds it up to Draco with a grin.

“Two fo-or one sale!” He says brightly, and Draco hesitantly takes the object from the boy, straightening up to give it a good once over.

While every other record seemed to be covered in dust and packed tightly away, this one was smooth to the touch as Draco ran his fingers over the image on the cover. A man, standing in front of a brick building at night. There was a sign above his head reading “K. West”, and in the upper-left corner it read: The Rise and Fall of Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars.

“I’m not sure I understand…”

Draco’s squinting, rereading the words in the hopes that they’d change into a sentence he was able to even begin to understand.

Teddy snatches it from his hands, walking over to the record player with a little hop in his step, smiling excitedly over at Draco before he removes the black disc from its sheath with an impressive amount of care for a toddler.

“This was daddy’s fa-avorite, Haz says,” Teddy tells him softly, and Draco’s heart seizes and stutters and the least he can do is stand there like a dolt and listen to Ziggy Stardust.

He watches with barely suppressed intrigue as Teddy gently eases the needle onto the disc.

He steps back as a calm piano plays through the cluttered store, filling up the space with an easy tune, a strong voice and a steady beat.

He’d never heard music quite like this before, not even at Granger’s, and there’s something overwhelming tugging at him as he looks over at Teddy, watching him drum his little fingers against his overalls. He can’t help but smile a little when Teddy lifts his gaze, grinning up at Draco and bobbing his head encouragingly.

“And he was alright,

The band was all together

Yes, he was alright

The song went on forever”

Draco concedes to the boy's silent encouragement, bobbing his head along with Teddy, prompting a sudden giggle out of his small cousin.

Teddy starts mouthing the words around his grin.

“And he was awful nice

Really quite paradise

And he sang all night,

All night long

Oh, how I sighed,

When they asked if I knew his name,”

“Teddy!”

They both jumped at the distant call, and Teddy quickly scrambled to stop the record before whoever called for him rounded the corner.

“I’m no-ot supposed to play the records when Harry’s not here,” Teddy whispers, shooting a wide eyed, guilty look Draco’s way— as if they were both in trouble.

haven’t attempted really writing a drarry fic because good god the amount of feelings jam packed into these things is crazy and i’m gonna have to do my best to sort through it all 🫡

[yanderecrazysie]

"My boy's an ugly crier but he's such a pretty liar"

Amajiki? Like maybe he got found out of being guilty for stalking and reader went to his place to break up with him for this very reason. And then the boy goes through the satges if greif, guilttripping her like:

"you still like me, right? I never did anything you didn't like!" "the stalking? I just wanted to be sure you're safe like any partner

Poor little stalker Tamaki! I also have no idea why I call him Tamaki and not Amajiki but it's a habit I cannot break.

Title: My Boy

Pairings: Amajiki Tamaki x Reader

WARNINGS: Yandere themes

Summary: Tamaki’s dedication ran deeper than you thought.

“My boy's an ugly crier but he's such a pretty liar…

…My boy, my boy, my boy

He ain't a man and sure as hell ain't honest”

-from “My Boy” by Billie Eilish

You never could have seen it coming.

Tamaki was the perfect boyfriend. It was like he could read your mind- know exactly what you wanted before you knew you wanted it.

Texted a friend you wanted Chinese food? He’d be on your doorstep, holding a bag of Chinese food no more than an hour later.

You needed to go shopping? Done, done, and done! He would even grab things you never put on your shopping list but desperately needed.

You thought Tamaki was just really intuitive. You thought it was just that he knew you so well.

You thought he was just a good boyfriend.

—-------------------------------------------------

Soft music played throughout the bar. It was a quiet night, with you and your friends being some of the only people there. It wasn’t a well-known place, so it wasn’t surprising that you were nearly alone, seated at a table near a window.

“So Tamaki couldn’t make it?” Nejire asked, downing a cocktail in seconds.

“Yeah,” you said, a little sadly, “His shift ran late today.”

“But you get to spend more time with us!” Nejire squealed, taking your hands in hers and squeezing tightly, “I’ve been trying to set something up for so long!”

She had? As far as you knew, you only ever saw Nejire at group hangouts. You can’t imagine that you’d missed any messages from her, even if her only contact to you was through Tamaki.

“Well, we’re all together now,” Mirio hiccuped. 

Mirio had gotten here before the both of you. He was several drinks in and he was not someone who could hold his alcohol.

He turned to you, “I’m surprised you and Tamaki aren’t married already.” 

“Yes, well,” you chuckled awkwardly, “We’re taking it slow.”

“You’re taking it slow,” Mirio countered with a laugh. He had made similar jokes before but Tamaki was always there to lead his best friend away, saying “Okay, okay, you’ve had enough to drink buddy.”

You almost let it slide. Almost.

“What do you mean? Does Tamaki want to marry me or something?”

“Does he want to marry you?” Mirio laughed, “He’s had your engagement ring picked out before you two started dating.”

You and Nejire stared at him. 

“You mean that… figuratively, right?” You asked quietly.

Mirio seemed to realize he had said the wrong thing, because he suddenly tried to change the topic, “Did either of you see last night’s Saturday Night Live?”

“Mirio,” you asked, trying to sound casual despite your pounding heart, ”How did Tamaki act before we started dating?”

“Well…” Mirio took another sip of his beer, “He was always over at your house, hanging out with you or whatever.”

Your heartbeat spiked. Tamaki had never come over to your house until a month after you had started dating.

“He had a lot of pictures of you on his phone, since you were, you know, friends before lovers or whatever.”

You thought the first time you met him was when he asked you on your first date. And you hated taking pictures.

What the hell was going on? Had Tamaki been…stalking you?

Cold fear was starting to settle in your veins and you were suddenly questioning everything. 

All those months of feeling like you weren’t alone, all those walks home where you felt eyes on the back of your head, all those feelings that you thought went away because you had a strong, heroic boyfriend… Was that because of him?

Nejire was usually kind of air-headed, but when she sensed something was wrong, she was quick to act and became serious fast. “Give me your phone.”

You put the password in and handed it over, still going over your entire relationship in your head.

Nejire searched for a second, then showed the screen to you, tapping on an app you hadn’t noticed before. It looked innocent enough- like a calculator app, but not one you remembered downloading.

“This is a tracker app,” Nejire explained, anger seeping through her words, “It tracks your location and sends all your texts to whoever it’s connected to. And I’m pretty sure that person is Tamaki.”

A chill ran down your spine. When had he done this to your phone? To you?

Mirio had passed out cold. Nejire turned to you, looking worried, “What are you going to do?”

“Whatever I have to,” you said softly, pulling out your wallet to pay for your drink.

—---------------------------

Tamaki walked through the door, hanging his coat on the hanger and turning to go to the bedroom. To his surprise, the living room light clicked on, revealing you sitting in the recliner, looking three parts angry and one part terrified.

“What happened?” Tamaki asked nervously.

“Did you stalk me?” You demanded to know.

Tamaki froze. How had you figured it out? What was he supposed to say? 

“N-no, baby, I would never do that to you,” Tamaki soothed.

“Mir- someone told me that you went over to my house and had pictures of me on your phone… before we dated.”

“They’re lying!” Tamaki’s voice went up an octave, his face twisting in panic. He was never good in stressful situations. He never thought you would ever find out what he was like before your relationship. Or during, for that matter.

“What about the app on my phone?” You demanded.

“Baby, baby,” Tamaki put out his hands like he was approaching a wild beast, “I would never, ever do anything to hurt or scare you. I promise.”

You shook your head, “With all I’ve heard and with the app I found, I don’t think I can stay in this relationship,” you said, getting out of the chair and walking past Tamaki, “I’ve already got my stuff out of here. So we should go our separate wa-”

You stumbled forward when Tamaki threw himself to the ground, wrapping his arms around your legs. A loud wail cut through the quiet apartment’s air. It took you a second to realize Tamaki had buried his face into the back of your legs, wetting them with his tears.

You looked down at him, a mess of tears and snot, body wracked with sobs, big watery eyes staring up at you.

“Tamaki get off-”

“NO!” Tamaki screamed, “No no no no NO!”

“Wha-?”

“You can’t leave me. I’ve worked too hard and for too long. You can’t ever leave me. You can… you can stay here!” Tamaki let out a broken laugh, still sniffling as tears poured down his cheeks.

“Get off of me,” you tried to move your legs but it was no use, Tamaki wasn’t budging.

And his eyes had turned from tear-filled to furious.