#ruse is a little sensitive on the keyblade thing because even if her heart could take one she doesn't want one

[beastenraged]

oranges and unicorns

@hallowed-nebulae

What would it be like, Xion wonders, to live a life before this one?

To wonder what was more real, a current life or the memories from before? ...maybe she does know it’s like for Xehanort and Ruse. Because that’s what happened with her and Sora, how she doubted her realness because of the memories she carried from Sora.

..her friends helped her discover who she was, outside Sora. Because Sora never became friends with them, thought he befriended (still befriends) so many others. 

That’s what happened with Ruse too, with Namine and herself. Among others. That’s must have what happened. 

...but what about Xehanort? Do they have friends that support them? There is Ven and Terra and Vanitas, and they seem helpful. Especially Vanitas, he and Xehanort seem close. Oh, that’s good then! They do have friends!

But talking to them would probably still be good. 

“Do you know where Xehanort is?” Xion asks Ruse. 

Ruse looks up from her orange, peels in her mouth as she slowly blinks at Xion. 

“Sure you don’t want to know where Vanitas is?” Ruse teases, after swallowing the peels down with a noisy gulp. 

Her cheeks warm as she looks away from those knowing red eyes. “Uh-! He was nice, but...I don’t want to be overbearing! What if he’s like you and doesn’t like that kind of thing?”

Those same red eyes soften. “That’s a good point. What if I check for you? None of ‘em will think you’re interested, and then get embarrassed to be around you.”

Xion twists her hands together. “I would appreciate it.”

That’s what you’re supposed to say about that sort of thing, right?

“Okay.” Ruse gives a firm nod, tossing her orange up and down. “Let’s go find Xehanort!”

Finding Xehanort doesn’t take long. She’s in the big open part of the castle with the glass windows, talking with unicorn-man. Ira, that’s his name. The light comes through in all different colors through the fixed up glass, breaking apart on Xehanort’s face. 

Making her look like...a rainbow. Or a quilt. Not anything broken, just pieces that are fitting together like they’re meant to. 

“Heya!” Ruse speaks first, takes the attention so Xion can look the pair over some more. It’s what they usually do, and Xion is forever grateful for it. She should be over needing to be so careful, this isn’t the Organization, but...Xion might always need to watch and look before she can speak.

Ira the unicorn man merely gives a polite nod in their direction. Xehanort stops talking, looking a little nervous. Oh, the unicorn mask is so very elaborate! Her fingers itch to fold herself a mask just like it out of paper. Or a unicorn head!

“What do you want?” Xehanort asks.

Ruse peels off an orange slice. Two. Tosses them in Ira’s and Xehanort’s direction. Xehanort fumbles but manages, Ira catches the offered slice without even a blink. 

Ruse’s way of trying to make them feel welcome, Xion knows. It’s just like how she brought Xion to the Twilight Town bakery after Xion...cried about being a fake. Left the Organization, in exchange for a hug and treats. ...That makes her sound like a easy mark, doesn’t it?

(No, it’s more than that. It was the comfort offered, the truth after so many lies. A promise that Ruse offered and has fulfilled, many times over.)

“Soooo,” Ruse draws out. “What’s Vanitas’ thoughts on a one time date? Hypothetically?”

Xehanort chokes. Looks up from the orange she’s been examining suspiciously. “Is this a bribe? Is that why you gave this to me?”

Ruse laughs. Throws her head back in an exaggerated fashion. “No, of course not! Everyone deserves food and that food is just to say hi! The question’s separate, yes or no?”

“...you would have to ask them,” Xehanort says. 

“Alright. Sounds good to me.”

Xion rubs her tongue against the back of her teeth. So maybe she has a chance? Just maybe?

“You are the same kind,” Ira says, out of nowhere. He’s not looking at the orange or eating it. Just holding it. “Both of you are Dream Eaters.”

Ruse looks taken aback. “Uh, yes?”

Xion nods her head. Waits for him to say more. Looking him over, in his bright robes and with his hidden face. 

Xehanort looks them over closely with grey eyes. “Both of you? You’re Dream Eaters?”

Ruse tilts her head back and forth. Xion speaks up. “Yes. Also known as Replicas, more specifically.”

“Replicas?”

“That means we were supposed to be other people,” Ruse helpfully adds. “Both of us were made in the image of other Keyblade wielders. To make more Keyblade warriors, you know?”

Ira inhales. “How foolish. Taking on a Keyblade should be a choice, not something forced on a child.”

That seems...personal. Xion looks him over carefully. 

Ruse shrugs in forced causality. “It turned out okay in the end. Xion’s got her changing face and she’s not forced to be Sora. And I’m not a Riku, Riku’s my brother instead.”

“...do you have a Keyblade?” Xehanort asks. “I saw Xion with one. But not you.”

Ruse scratches at her scars. “Nope. Not for me.”

“Ruse, if you want one, I can help,” Xion offers. Because there was that old book with the story of passing on Keyblades. If Xion could get a Keyblade, Ruse could too.

“Not for me,” Ruse repeats with more heat. “Besides, you know what Even says about my Heart and stuff. Not strong enough to support Keyblade experiments and all that, leave it be.”

That’s true. Xion nods as Ruse offers her an orange slice. She accepts, bringing it up to her mouth. The fruit is tart. Good. 

While Xehanort and Ira are still digesting what Ruse said, it’s Xion’s chance to speak. To look carefully into Xehanort’s grey eyes. “See, we get it. You don’t have to be whatever you were before. You can be...a person. Whatever person you want.”

If Ruse can promise that and keep it, then Xion can too. Even for someone from a different universe, even someone with a past life. 

Promise. 

[lightandfellowship]

(Major KHDR spoilers)

Baldr and Hoder’s “heartwarming” reunion suddenly escalating to them drawing their keyblades on each other is so much more tragic when you realize that right before it happens, Baldr finally opens up to Hoder about how much he’s been secretly suffering this whole time. Being frank with her about how his empathy and sensitivity made him vulnerable to the darkness in other people’s hearts, how Hoder’s light was the only thing that made him feel SAFE, how terrified he was that he’d either lose her or that she’d leave him behind. Telling her all of these things that he’s probably been meaning to tell her for years now, but was always too afraid to vocalize because he didn’t know how she would react. And then all of that emotional rawness gets undermined moments later because, as it turns out, none of that mattered in the end. They still turn on each other.

Obviously the emotional struggles that led to him falling to darkness are kind of a moot point at this juncture because Baldr (1. has methodically killed a bunch of people in an attempt to purge the world, (2. is possessed/aided by a dark entity of some kind, and (3. can’t be trusted, but still. The fact that we get a glimpse of the “real” Baldr baring his heart and soul to her and yet, seemingly, even that wasn’t enough to make his sister hesitate or reconsider her options when people unrelated to him like Eraqus and Xehanort did hesitate and did try to banish the darkness from his heart first before resorting to mercy killing him is just...dang. She must be really firm of heart and determined to vanquish darkness no matter where it hides, at least when compared to other characters who visibly struggled with the decision to take Baldr’s life (Vidar, Eraqus, Xehanort, etc.).

Like by no means is Hoder in the wrong for drawing her keyblade, Baldr drawing his at the same time suggests that they were BOTH planning to attack the other when they got close enough, but it’s still kinda wild to consider the possibility that her beloved little brother being vulnerable in front of her and finally opening up about his pain may not have been enough to stir her heart or make her resolve waver. Maybe Baldr admitting to having darkness in his heart even BEFORE he got possessed is what made her change her mind about trying to talk him down (that is, assuming her comforting words were a genuine attempt at trying to save him rather than a ruse to get close enough to kill him). Or maybe seeing her brother suffering DID stir her heart but she just resolved to push through it in order to do what had to be done. Either way. That’s rough.

It’s just an unfortunate situation all around. Unfortunate that it was already too late by the time Baldr finally got the courage to speak up. Unfortunate that all of Baldr’s fears were confirmed in the worst possible way. Unfortunate that Baldr was led to believe that his reluctance to communicate with her was potentially justified. Unfortunate that he could only conclude that she was never going to understand him.

Maybe in another timeline, Baldr opening up to her before he got possessed and killed a bunch of people would have resulted in a better ending. Maybe Hoder would have tried to accept him, help him, understand him, spare him. But not here. Not now. Not after everything he’s done.