#runnin on two hours of restless sleep

[waka-chan-out]

ALSNJEKDBF OMG HI MEG I SAW THE WORDS STUDIO GHIBLI AND I RUSHED OVER AS SOON AS I COULD

Okay so y’all I fucking love Studio Ghibli so much I could cry Seriously the movies are just so fucking good I can’ttt and Princess Mononoke is definitely one of my favorites! I love it so much and jfc the music for that one is just so fucking amazing😫 (honestly the music for all of them is god-tier) My absolute all time favorite one is Howl’s Moving Castle tho. That one never fails to make me cry istg it’s just such a feel good movie and the way Howl looks at Sophie???? Alsnjdhebwjrh dear lord just take me now😩😭 (seriously that’s literally all I want in life tbh) I relate a lot to that one too bc most of the time I feel very unlovable and not that pleasing to look at/rather plain (kinda similar to how Sophie feels) and I like to believe that there will be someone someday who will come along and see me and think that I am worth their time and their love.

Wow that took a bit of a tangent lol sorry for rambling, I do that a lot when I get excited🙃 Thanks for listening to my thoughts:) Love you Meg💕

HI BABES I WAS HOPING SOMEONE WOULD WANT TO CHAT ABOUT THIS WITH ME.

studio ghibli amazes me not just because of how stunning their movies always are, but also because it seems like everyone has a favorite based on their own preferences and life experience. like, i absolutely see the appeal of howl’s moving castle and i think it’s one of the loveliest films ever made. the score, the world, the voice acting, the visuals, the characters, just everything is absolutely perfect and wonderful. but i feel like it never quite stirred up that same feeling in me as it did for other people. but princess mononoke is everything i loved about studio ghibli but it feels like it was made for me. to be fair, i’ve only seen howl’s moving castle, spirited away, and now mononoke, but that’s the one that made me feel really seen by the studio. i was invested in the worlds and characters, and connected with ashitaka more than i have any other ghibli protagonist. the animals and the unsettling imagery are right up my alley, and god, the ROMANCE. one thing that i missed in howl’s moving castle is i’m a very outwardly affectionate person when i connect with someone romantically or on any kind of deeper level. on top of that, my top love language has to be physical touch, so the distance between sophie and howl before the end just always made me feel a little on edge. but princess mononoke solved all of my problems. ashitaka is so attentive and caring and physically affectionate that, again, it just felt like it was made precisely for me.

also the tree spirit is horrifying and the lil forest spirits made me feel what i think other people experience with calcifier and the dust sprites. i’m obsessed with them.

please don’t apologize for rambling !! i love talking about stuff like this. that movie meant a lot to me and howl’s moving castle holds a special place in my heart so i’m always open to talking about them.

[amor-immortalem]

The Lord of Fools and the Stubborn Commoner ch.27

Previous

Taglist: @flare-love @ithinkimdekubutreallyimdenki @ice-icebaby @hobin-gnoblin

As the pair of men returned to the nursery, they find Arella and Cyrus have moved outside to sit on the balcony with Azalea and Aurelius while the head butler stood watch over the four of them.

“Welcome back, sir,”

“Thanks,” Mammon starts, “Lucifer’s gonna be here with us for an extended time. Prepare a room for him.”

“I’ll have it done by the end of the hour,” the servant bows and takes his leave.

The two Lords nod as they move to join Arella and Cyrus on the small balcony.

“Everything still goin’ good?” The white-haired man asks.

“Yeah,” she smiles softly, “they just had a diaper change and then we relocated to out here. I think Cyrus has already taken favor to Azalea over Aurelius though. He’s been so wrapped up in talking to her that he seems like he’s shut the world out.”

“How adorable,” Lucifer comments before making his way to Cyrus and crouching down beside him. He doesn’t make any moves to take the little girl from her brother but merely overs a finger for her to grasp onto as he shakes her hand. “Good afternoon, little ones, are you enjoying the sunshine?”

“Hi, Uncle Lucifer,” Cyrus smiles as Azalea just stares at her uncle, How was your trip here?”

“It went wonderfully. The ride was smooth, thank you for asking. And I see now, you’ve got some new siblings- are you excited to be a big brother?” He asks and the boy nods. “That’s wonderful. Being the oldest comes with a couple of responsibilities, you know that right?”

Cyrus nods as he looks down at Azalea.

“I have to be a good example for them and protect them the best I can.”

“Very good.” The Lord of Corruption nods. “I think you’ll make a fine older brother as long as you remember that.”

As the pair continued to interact, Mammon and Arella watch with a warm smile on their faces at the adorable scene.

*********************

Later that night, after everyone had gone and settled down to bed, Mammon and Arella are curled up together. The white-haired man can’t sleep no matter what position he lays in or what kind of relaxation techniques he tries and Arella isn’t faring much better- not able to sleep because her husband is so restless.

“Is there something on your mind, Love?” She asks as she runs her hand through his soft, fluffy hair, his head is tucked up under her chin.

“My mind is just runnin’ wild.” He mumbles, “Been thinkin’ ‘bout what happened up in the mountains…”

“Me too. Did she tell you what happened to her?”

“Yeah…”

“Maybe you two should talk… what if she’s being truthful?”

Mammon only shrugs. He doesn’t know what else to say. “She’ll be out of our lives once I hand ‘er over ta Asmo after the christening.”

“That’s… nice. I feel like you’re changing the subject though.”

“Do you really wanna talk about this though?” The tanned man rolls over onto his back, “I figured ya wouldn’t really care about some troublesome woman who was plannin’ ta kill ya not more than a week ago.”

“I only care about it because it’s bothering you, Mammon.” She rests her hand on his shoulder, “The whole situation with Essi hurt you deeply and you’ve held on to this for five years. Don’t you think you deserve to have closure over it? Because that’s what I think.”

He looks away from her. “Maybe I don’t deserve it, Treasure.”

Arella only frowns at him.

“You do. You deserve that and so much more. And if it does come to be that she was lying to gain your sympathy as a way to work her way back into yours and Cyrus’ lives, then she’s the one who never deserved you, Love, because you are such a fantastic husband and such a strong person to have carried this silently for so long.”

His eyes drift back to hers, a soft blush on his cheeks as her hands move to cup his face and he can’t help but notice the tenderness and sincerity in those eyes of her and suddenly he can’t help the way tears form in the corner of his lapis-like eyes.

“You’re- how can you be so kind to me, so understanding of the situation,” He asks, “so unthreatened by the presence of my ex-wife when any other woman I’ve known wouldn’t stand for me to have any sort of interaction with her and yet here you are actively encouraging it after all you’ve been through at her hands?”

“Because you and I have built more than enough trust between us that I know this won’t change the bond we’ve built and the year we’ve spent together.” Arella brushes away his bangs, “Because I know you love me just as much as you love our children and that love doesn’t sway easily.”

She leans down and presses a gentle kiss to his lips and he reciprocates in kind before she pulls away.

“I love you,” the white-haired man’s voice soft, breathless even as their foreheads press together and their fingers lace together. “I love ya so much that it hurts. I don’t know what I would do without ya now.”

“I know,” Arella smiles, and I love you too, my sweet husband. Get some rest now, okay? I can see your desperately tired from the day and the lack of sleep we’ve gotten. I’ll look after the twins when they wake.”

“Thank you.” Is all he can say as his eyes slip closed and he’s met with the sensation of her head on his chest.

*********************

In the morning, Mammon wakes up to the feeling of someone rubbing his back gently.

“Mammon,” her voice is gentle on his ears as he shifts, “its time for breakfast, Love.”

Mammon only grumbled as he peaked an eye open before pushing himself into a sitting position.

“What time is it? I’m still tired.” He says as he leans into her. “Don’t feel very good.”

“You are a little warm,” Arella hums, pressing her palm to his fore head, “it’s just a little after nine. Would you rather take breakfast up here instead?”

“No, just wanna sleep.” He sighs, “Stay with me?”

“I can’t for right now,” she says, “I have to keep Cyrus and your brother company at breakfast but I can keep you company afterwards in between Azalea and Aurelius’ feedings. They just ate so they should be good for a couple hours.”

“Okay,” Mammon pouts and Arella can’t help but find it adorable as she helps him lay back down. “Sweet dreams, Darling. I’ll be back.” She presses a kiss to his forehead before heading back downstairs.

She informs a few servants of her husband’s condition and asked them to keep an eye on him when she couldn’t be with him and to let her know if he worsens.

With that taken care of, she joins Lucifer and Cyrus at the table.

“Mommy, where’s Daddy?” Cyrus asks.

“Unfortunately, Daddy isn’t feeling very well this morning so he won’t be joining us, but perhaps with some rest, he’ll feel better later.”

“Oh, okay.” The little prince just goes back to munching on his breakfast.

“You and I’ll just have to start planning the ceremony on our own if Mammon’s sick.” Lucifer says, “Mammon tends to recover quickly from illness if it gets caught early enough.”

Arella nods at that. “He’s sleeping now, so in between looking after the babies as far as feedings go and periodically checking in on him, it should work.”

“Its settled then. You can check in on him after breakfast and we’ll convene in the office every couple if hours.”

*********************

Next

Feel free to discuss what you thinks gonna happen next in the comments. I love reading your ideas.

[givemeonebreath]

A big, messy Linked Universe playlist

Link for Links

Heavy on the angst, because of who I am as a person. (At the same time, don’t take it too seriously, man.)

Influenced by canon, manga (TP Link is really Going Through It™ ), my personal perceptions, and popular fandom canon.

A pretty wide variety of genres, with a bias towards metal and prog rock.

I kept snippets of lyrics for most songs, also because of who I am as a person. (Some were particularly hard to narrow down to just one verse or chorus.) Those - and a little more rambling - are under the cut if you really want, in the order of the playlist. But. It’s long.

I didn’t initially make this with the intent to share, but hey. Throughout my past year+ of listening, I’ve been haphazardly adding songs to a playlist I very creatively named Links. If something reminded me of them, whether through the music or lyrics or both, I threw it on the playlist, so some songs might seem odd or vague. Some are really on the nose, as subtle as a sledgehammer. (Sky for Sky? Dude. Sorry.) Some are there because of a fitting line or two that stuck in my head. Ultimately, music - like any form of creative expression - can be interpreted in a multitude of ways. 

My listening habits and tastes are erratic, which is why this is one big, jumbled playlist and not separated for different Links. Not to mention if I did that, some (Wild, Legend) would have a lot and some (Wind, Four) would have none, both because of my own familiarity with them, and because of the general themes of the music I tend to listen to. Most songs are a general ‘hero’s spirit reborn’ mood, anyway - those are the first part of the playlist. The second half is more nuanced to specific Links, plus a few Ganon vibes.

1. Deep Purple - April (Koji Kondo, composer of the original Legend of Zelda theme, was into Deep Purple as a kid, and it shows.)

2. Kamelot - Regalis Apertura

3. Au4 - So Just Hang On, Beautiful One (I’ve posted this here before. I can’t hear it without thinking of LU now.) So I slipped in through the gate almost unknown. All my border stamps were late. Seven days old. Cold hand griped my shoulder blade, broke the bone. Bloody nose and turned away, all the way home.

4. FC Kahuna - Hayling Don’t think about all those things you fear, just be glad to be here

5. Glass Animals - Youth Boy, when I left you you were young I was gone, but not my love You were clearly meant for more Than a life lost in the war

6. Pain of Salvation - Restless Boy A restless boy in a world too slow A flame born into cinder, ash, and glow I've given everything I gave it all Yet find myself alone

7. Haken - The Endless Knot Our design shifted frame by frame! Across the line our cycle starts to fail. Our design shifted frame by frame! Across the line we die to live again.   We need a story to believe in. We need a hero to prevail. We need a challenge we can overcome, it takes a tragedy to make us one 

8. Kamelot - Memento Mori (I particularly associate this with Time and Twilight) I am the god in my own history The master of the game I may believe if she would come to me And whisper out my name Sometimes I wonder where the wind has gone If life has ever been Sometimes I wonder how belief alone Can cut me free from sin

9. Katatonia - Fighters Look I told you so We never stop If we said that We'll back it up For sure You know We're fighters

10. Megadeth - This Day We Fight! (I mean, all Links, but particularly Warriors) For this I was chosen, because I fear nothing With confidence I tread through the dead of the night Off to another war-torn, faraway battlefield Wherein lies a demonic enemy horde

11. Moon Tooth - Igneous Well, the spirit took me And this old broken body leapt up and danced Settin’ out Settin' out with all my heroes in a bundle at my back Hawk am I More wings span in my shadow than overcast Yeah, you know what they say Always need something to look up to, ha

12. Samael - Moongate Destiny, tomorrow is today Destiny, without boundaries How many nights will we spend together traveling infinity back and forth and again How many times will we go together questioning eternity about us about our wonders...

13. TOOL- Parabola This body holding me reminds me of my own mortality Embrace this moment, remember We are eternal, all this pain is an illusion

14. Lunatic Soul - Blood on the Tightrope No matter how hard you try To shut down your feverish thoughts They hunt you down with no regret Cause you have to fix it all

15. Hybrid - Keep It In The Family

16. Soul Savers - Unbalanced Pieces Gone, now carry on Through violent seasons I call you mother, mother, mother In vain, absent chain The twilight's bleeding And the playing board has two unbalanced pieces

17. Steve Von Till - Valley of the Moon All she gives is a stone facade Like ill-given flowers at a dead man's wake Here we slave for the dreams of another And fight over scraps like wayward dogs

18. Ludovico Einaudi - Experience

19. Lunatic Soul - Summoning Dance Three stones on the right side Three stones on the left My vicious circle of life and death   “Oh you want it” I hear it again “Oh you want it” My burden Curse to break

20. Lunatic Soul - Through Shaded Woods Run through your shaded woods Run through your shaded mind Run through the night Run away Run through the darkness Run

21. Lunatic Soul - Naavie

22. David Bowie - Nature Boy There was a boy A very strange, enchanted boy They say he wandered very far Very far, over land and sea A little shy and sad of eye But very wise was he

23. The Dandy Warhols - Sleep Well, I could sleep forever But it's of her I dream If I could sleep forever I could forget about everything 

24. Au4 - Everyone is Everyone (and Everything is Everything) Tripping and tumbling, Flipping and fumbling. Flowing on the rivers of sadness That have been forever rumbling.   But from dawn until now Of all the paths that I could have gone down Of all the valleys That I could have been flowing through.   In spite of all the chaos And all that has come between us, How is it I still find myself Here with you. 

25. Kingcrow - Everything Goes Your hands again upon the ground Falling rain for hours and hours As you learn the game Time dispels the fog ... Ever been there? Ever felt like prey? Ever thought your mind was feeble? Lot of things that don’t make sense

26. Pain of Salvation - Icon As a child I felt too old And now when I'm grown-up I feel too young A different kind so I've been told Just slightly out of reach and out of time

27. Sophia Loizou - Divine Interference (I got spooky dungeon vibes. Also, the title.)

28. Carpenter Brut - Fab Tool Runnin Gunnin Forward in the phantom shatter so grand Splatter grand, arcanum fuel Wrought iron out of the sky Over me, tells no lie

29. Blue Stahli - Death Will Have to Run All on the open road Where none will ever grow A journey toward the known With countless miles to go

30. Gyroscope - Mistakes & Ladders I am the first? No I can't be the first A continuous nothing, destined for something Tell me who you are and why you trapped me here

31. Queens of the Stone Age - Run, Pig, Run Run, pig, run Here I come

32. Chali 2na & Krafty Kuts - Guard The Fort The swords are drawn and odds are stacked And we clash the impact's a thunderous clap Calm demeanor Even though we are under attack [...my turn to guard the fort ready for combat]

33. The Great Discord - Army of Me (lol)

34. Kongos - Terrified I think I'll start again and change my name You only live once or twice, what a shame Somebody fucked up when designing this game

35. Woodkid - Run Boy Run Run, boy, run! This ride is a journey to Run, boy, run! The secret inside of you Run, boy, run! This race is a prophecy Run, boy, run! And disappear in the trees

36. The Beta Machine - The End A million miles away from you this time I'll do what it takes I'm on my way If lines are in the sand I'll go under If I can make it in time I will bring you back with me

37. Devin Townsend Project - Gump When we last met who was I? I'm sorry we no longer see eye to eye The energy to keep you in while keeping myself out I'm sorry how you'll take this  But I just don't have the patience anymore 

38. Arrested Youth - Riot! I can't get much satisfaction living in this cave It's tough to breathe, I'm in the belly of the beast Can't sleep with all my rage With me and all my generations living in this cage Pick up your guns and tell your sons, tonight we break the cage

39. Led Zeppelin - Friends So anytime somebody needs you Don't let them down, although it grieves you Some day you'll need someone like they do Looking for what you knew

40. Faunts - M4, pt 2 (Wild) Fight your foes you're not alone Holy war is on the phone Asking to please stay on hold Bleeding loss of blood runs cold And I need you to recover   Because I can't make it on my own

41. Faith No More - Ashes to Ashes (Wild) I want them to know it's me, it's on my head I'll point the finger at me, it's on my head Smiling with the mouth of the ocean And I'll wave to you with the arms of the mountain

42. Devin Townsend - Jupiter (Wild) I know you At least I think I do Everything's changed But in the days that are so dark It's wonderful

43. Katatonia - Neon Epitaph (Wild) Shadow of my shadow Cling not to my grief I am long left behind now You are free

44. The Smashing Pumpkins - The Beginning is the End is the Beginning (Wild) Time has stopped before us The sky cannot ignore us No one can separate us For we are all that is left The echo bounces off me The shadow lost beside me There's no more need to pretend Cause now I can begin again 

45. Katatonia - Lacquer (Wild) My voice travelling Soaring bird above your head The house we lived in Ridden with disease ... The levee breaking I can't live to fight once more The road to the grave is straight as an arrow I'm just staying around to sing your song, baby

46. Eskimo Joe - This is Pressure (Wild) There is no romance in suffocation  The walls fall down like your expectations You want to scream  And you want to shout But you've built up steam  And you can't let it out This is pressure 

47. Portugal. The Man - 1000 Years (Wild) We'll wait 1000 years  Until the end of time We'll wait 1000 more Dressed up in gold and white We'll climb the mountain sides  To find what's in the sky We'll dig through mountain sides  To find what's deep inside

48. Au4 - An Ocean’s Measure of Sorrow (Wild) Forgot my name and who I was. Memories of nothing floating up. All of the sorrow we once knew, Colours the ocean's water blue.

49. Band of Skulls - Carnivorous (Twilight) I am corrosive and cohesive Like a chemical bond I'm all together undone I am the broken kingdom I'm just so, so, so  So carnivorous

50. Glass Animals - Flip (Twilight) I wanna go back with a club and attack I wanna take to my guns and break you I gotta make my little foe take his own

51. TV on the Radio - Wolf Like Me (Twilight) My mind has changed my body's frame, but, God, I like it My heart's aflame, my body's strained, but, God, I like it

52. Kamelot - The Spell (Twilight) All my demons cast a spell The souls of dusk rising from the ashes So the book of shadows tell The weak will always obey the master

53. OSI - Radiologue (Legend) I was dreaming I was heading west thirty days faster Had a fever woke up in a sweat bailing out the water  Can't go on Can't go back   Heard your voice coming through the noise wrote it in the radio log Hurt my head, wondering what you said so I threw it overboard  

54. Katatonia - Don’t Tell A Soul (Legend) I have been destroyed by the perfection that is a lie see I'm moving soon see my feet are already on the road and if you know where I’m going don’t tell a soul

55. Haken - The Mind’s Eye (Legend) The shape of things to come are closer than they seem Changing your design every time you disappear I'm planning my escape through portals of your mind Where people seem to drop like flies

56. Pain of Salvation - Species (Legend) Sometimes I hate my fucking species Yet most days I'll do anything to please it  My generation was fooled to pursue our dreams But it is not what it seems You never need what you want And you rarely want what you need

57. Euringer - Do You Kiss Your Mama with That Mouth? (Legend) All my life, misunderstood I'm fuckin' too smart, too smart for my own good The last question, before I go is "Hey motherfucka, do you kiss your mama with that mouth?"  Yes! I kiss your mama with this mouth

58. !!! - Pardon My Freedom (Legend) Like I give a fuck, like I give a shit Like I give a fuck about that shit Like I give a fuck about that motherfucking shit

59. Team Sleep - Ataraxia (Legend) Froze asleep Coma deep I dream I'm out with you Alone at sea

60. Oliver Tank - Embrace (Legend) You're in my dreams The world is torn apart at the seams And I don't wanna leave Wearing my heart on it's sleeve

61. Machine Gun Fellatio - The Girl of My Dreams (Is Giving Me Nightmares) (Legend) The girl of my dreams is giving me nightmares I don't know what it means but she's got multi-coloured hair When she stands in the sand I dream of peaches And I'm not sure what that means either

62. Earl Greyhound - Shotgun (Legend & Hyrule) I am nobody, nobody is who I am I am a traveler on this land And nothing, nothing, nothing in my hands

63. TV on the Radio - Staring at the Sun (Hyrule) You're staring at the sun You're standing in the sea Your mouth is open wide You're trying hard to breathe The water's at your neck There's lightning in your teeth Your body's over me

64. Echo & The Bunnymen - The Killing Moon (Time) Fate Up against your will Through the thick and thin He will wait until You give yourself to him

65. Sufjan Stevens - Sugar (Sky) Don’t break my heart, don’t break my flow now And all this rage has got to go now Let’s take up this lifeline Come on, baby, gimme some sugar Don’t make me wait Don’t make me wait too long Don’t make me sing the sad song Come on, baby, gimme some sugar

66. Obsydians - Ascension (Sky) Rise above the hardships you’ll face I will sign and keep on rising As long as you are giving me your soul and keep me awake Feel like home and spread your light around I will listen and just be there As long as you are giving me your love I’ll give you my soul

67. Sonique - Sky -_-

68. Enter Shikari - The King (Ganon) Watch your back, my friend I'm about to kickstart a cycle Of never ending revenge And this time it's primal, it's tribal

69. Saul Williams - WTF! (Ganon, Hylia) "You've been polluted, uprooted by time You have been muted, computed but I'm A living vessel of the one, of the moon, of the sun" Hey! You ain't as dead as you seem, what the fuck? Hey! But you keep living your lies

70. These New Puritans - We Want War (Ganon/ Dark Link/ any nemesis I guess) Shadows dance back up, it's happening again If you listen carefully you might hear them whisper: "We hold all the secrets, we hold all the words; But they're scrambled and broken so you'll never know" Can't you see them Floating like black ash? Can't you feel them Crawling down your back?

[stormfall1327]

Part 2 of For What It’s Worth! Still planning some revisions, but it’s at least finished! Also on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28964154/chapters/71075985

For What It’s Worth - Part 2

V flops over onto her back with a huff and slings her arm over her eyes. Another restless night. Reaching over to grab her phone, she lifts her arm and squints at the screen. 0010. Son of a bitch. This is the third time in the last hour she’s woken up, her mind too full of… everything. Resigning herself to the fact that she won’t be falling back to sleep any time soon, she rolls out of bed with a groan and pads barefoot over to her closet.

“Might as well see what’s keepin’ the rest of Night City awake,” she mutters, pulling on her favorite pair of jeans and an old tank. She slips on her leather boots and grabs a plaid flannel shirt from a hanger, pulling it on as she heads for the door with a sigh.

V steps out of her apartment complex and instinctively heads west toward Bradbury Street. In the distance, she hears the gentle roll of thunder above the noise of the streets. Paying no attention to where she’s headed, her mind wanders as she walks, thoughts ranging from her growing list of opened gigs to whether she remembered to eat today.

A few minutes later, she’s torn from her reverie as the first drops of rain start to fall. Glaring up at the sky and cursing under her breath, she ducks into the nearest alley and suddenly realizes where she is. She’d subconsciously made her way to Vik’s clinic. She’s immediately comforted by the green neon glow above his door. Guess he couldn’t sleep, either, she thinks with a smile.

She heads down the stairs, her mind already feeling lighter knowing she’ll be in commiserate company. Just before she reaches the gate, she spots a bloody footprint leading away from the clinic. She calls out to him as she rounds the corner, voice echoing feebly off the concrete and when she reaches the metal gate, her stomach drops into her shoes.

“Oh, FUCK. Vik!” V runs to him, heart crashing against her ribs as she takes in the scene in front of her. Fuck, is this all his?

Vik is slumped over on the operating chair, right hand pressed to his side as blood seeps between his fingers and pools on the floor. He’s coated in a thin sheen of sweat and his face is too pale, but at least he’s still breathing. She crouches down in front of him and cups her hand under his chin to lift his head.

“Hey, V,” he mumbles with a weak smile, eyes fluttering open to look at her.

“Jesus Christ, Vik! What the fuck happened to you?,” she asks, desperately trying to keep her voice from cracking. She reaches for his hand to pull it from his side, but he resists, letting out a pained grunt.

“Oh, for fuck’s sake, move your hand so I can see!”

He shakes his head and chuckles, face scrunching into a grimace at the movement. “Heh. Just a scratch. Asshole sure caught me off guard, though.” He huffs out a breath. “‘Sides, I’m the doctor here.” He winks at her before dropping his head again, a fresh gush of blood pouring out over his hand.

“Yeah, a fucking doctor who was gonna, what, let ‘imself bleed out all over the goddamn floor? Why the hell didn’t you call me?! Or Misty?! Or fucking Trauma, for that matter?!” She leaps to her feet, letting out a frustrated yell, hurt and anger and fear bubbling to the surface.

“Told ya. S’not that bad. I’m — fine.”

Her optics flash in warning as she scans him. “S’not that bad,” she mocks as she rolls her eyes. “Says the man who’s blood pressure is in the fucking toilet. You may be the doctor here, but I’m not about to stand here and watch you take one for the fucking team. I know what I’m doing. Trust me.”

She pushes him back against the chair a little more roughly than she truly intends to and grabs his hand again, pleading at him with her eyes. Let me help you.

“So, you wanna be my nurse, huh?” He waggles his eyebrows at her, but the gesture falls short as he finally pulls his hand away with a wince.

She laughs as she reaches over him to grab some scissors, gauze and betadine from the side table. “Dunno about a nurse, but I spent the last two years hangin’ with Atlanta’s best medics. Picked up a few tricks from ‘em that I’m sure’ll come in real handy about now. Also, sorry about your shirt.”

Before he can say anything, she grabs his lapels and yanks her hands apart, sending buttons flying before grabbing the scissors and cutting through his undershirt.

“Hey - !”

“Thought you were the doctor here? Just part of the job, right?” She gives him a wink and sets to work cleaning around the wound to get a better idea of what she’s working with. The puncture is deep, but clean and still bleeding heavily. “Hmm. Well-approximated. Clean edges. Must not have been a serrated blade. Should be easy enough to suture,” she says mostly to herself before glancing up at him. She feels her cheeks heat up when she catches him staring at her.

“Your, uh, pressure’s still shit though. Lost quite a bit of blood. Gonna at least need at least a liter or two of fluid to compensate.” She grabs the gauze and presses it to his side to try and staunch some of the bleeding, flinching when he sucks in a sharp breath.

“Huh. Guess those guys did teach you well.” He covers her hand with his and her stomach flips at the contact. “Suture and IV kits are in the drawer next to the desk, and - you should find some LR in one of the cabinets on the back wall.” She nods and pulls her hand away with a small smile. “Thanks. Hold that for me, ya? Be right back.”

She finds what she needs easily enough and begins arranging her supplies on the side table, peeling open the IV kit.

“Fifty eddies says you can’t hit it first stick.”

She gives him a look, but says nothing as she applies the tourniquet and cleans his arm with alcohol . 10 seconds later, she’s taping down a perfect 16g IV in his forearm and hooking him up to a liter of Lactated Ringers, sliding the clamp down to let it run wide open.

He huffs out a laugh. “Well, color me impressed. Now, let’s see if you can suture half as well as you started that IV,” he says with a wink.

Her face flushes at the praise. “Keep eggin’ me on like that and I’ll stitch up more than your wound, old man,” she says without bite, leveling her best glare at him as she fights back a smile. She nudges his hand aside to remove the saturated gauze and grabs the suture kit and local anesthetic from the table. Scanning vitals again, she’s pleased to see his blood pressure and heart rate improving.

She injects the anesthesia and sets to work suturing his wound, letting herself fall back on muscle memory. “So, you never did tell me what the hell happened,” she says, glancing up at him.

“Heh. Old client of mine stopped by for some late night ripper work and went psycho. Tried to get some baloperidol in him, but I guess he figured stabbin’ me was the way to go before runnin’ off.”

She pauses, taking in a deep breath and shaking her head. “Holy fuck, Vik! You’re lucky all he did was stab you once! He could have… you - you could have fucking died before I even got here!” Her voice finally cracks under the sudden onslaught of emotion and she throws her head back, blinking away the hot tears springing up in her eyes.

“Yeah, but I didn’t. And for what it’s worth, V, I’m damn glad you’re here. I owe ya one.”

She laughs through a sniffle and gets back to suturing. “Please, Vik. After all the times you’ve patched me up, this is the least I can do.” She finishes the last stitch and ties the knot, stepping back to admire her handiwork. Vik pushes himself up on his elbows and looks down, a smirk playing at the corner of his mouth. “Not bad. A little crooked, but it’ll do.” She shoves his shoulder playfully and leans down to remove his IV before walking over to wet a cloth in the sink. “Asshole. And besides, it’s a helluva lot better than you woulda done,” she calls over her shoulder. Turning back, she finds him sitting on the edge of the chair, legs dangling over the edge. She walks over and grabs his chin, gently wiping the sweat from his face. “Don’t you do that to me again, Viktor Vektor, you hear me?” Her eyes are stormy as she stares him down. He stands up gingerly and pulls her into a left-sided hug. “Huh. Now you know how I feel.”

[themoonandotherslikeit]

The Hand That Reaches for God -Chapter 16

Warnings: Mention of rape, graphic violence, and language. 

Chapter Sixteen

“So we drove on toward death through the cooling twilight.” - F. Scott Fitzgerald

-26 Days After-

The morning was cool for June as Ophelia snapped her thigh holster in place. She slid her hand gun into place. She hoisted her shotgun over her shoulder and stuck her blade in her boot. She didn’t like guns, but after her last run in with the Rogues she wasn’t in a position to deny the necessity. Plus, she’d never felt so badass in her life. She left Emerson asleep, hugging her pillow, and made sure to give Sam a really big kiss goodnight. She left him breathless. His love wasn’t lost on her. She could tell that their hearts beat together every time he looked at her.

He wouldn’t approve of her going out in the field, but it wasn’t about him and her, it was about Emerson. At the end of the day it was the Maklen sisters. If they had to pick, it would always be each other. She had to do it for her sister.

Pheli leaned against the tree, waiting for the rest of the group. She sipped her coffee out of her canteen, and focused on the colors in the sky as the sun teased the horizon.  

“Well, Hell in a hand basket, you showed up after all.”

“Ash.” Pheli said with a smile. “Morning.”

“We had a bet runnin that you wouldn’t show up.” He flipped the bottom of his mullet over his shoulder.

She rolled her eyes. “And whys that?”

He shrugged. “Gender bias, probably.”

Ash was a serious genius. He didn’t look like much in his cut off flannel and mullet, but he went to MIT before it all went to shit. He made the water filter system in the camp and was solely responsible for the gate around the community. He was damn fun at get togethers, too. The first night by the fire he ended up buddying up with her and Sam singing along with Benny. He made a genuine fool out of himself, and that made him okay in Pheli’s book.

“So fucked up.”

“Agreed.” He said, adjusting his machete on his shoulder. “Let’s head to the Jeep. Gordon’s probably already there.”

“Who else is coming?” She asked as they began their walk to the gate where the Jeep was parked.

Ash shrugged, walking with a bit of a bounce in his step. “Hell if I know. People don’t tell me shit. Always be underestimated, Blondie. When you are, it’s really easy to surprise people.” He offered her a wide grin.

“I know exactly what you mean.” She said smoothly.

Her hair was in two braids down her back to keep her hair out of the way. There were no flowers in them that day. There was no time for glitter and pleasantries.

Ash was right. Gordon was already in the front seat, tapping the steering wheel impatiently. “Shot gun!” Ash called with a wide grin, breaking out into a funny, wobbling jog to the Jeep.

Pheli rolled her eyes and picked up her speed. She opened the back door and slid in.

“Surprised you made it.” Gordon grunted from the front seat.

“Lots of that going around.” She said, shifting her weight to keep her knife from digging into her calf.

The door to her right opened up and Dean slid in next to her, wearing a wide ear-to-ear grin. “Ready to go!”

Pheli started at him her heart rate leaping at the sight of him. “What the fuck are you doing here?” She hissed through clenched teeth.

“Cas mentioned your heroic volunteering. Couldn’t let you have all the fun.”

“Did you tell Sam?”

“And let him try to follow you? No fucking way.” Dean laughed breathlessly. He reached forward and patted Gordon’s arm, causing Pheli to flinch instinctively. “Come on, Buddy. Let’s get this show on the road.”

“Ash?” Gordon asked, starting the Jeep.

Ash leaned forward and pressed a garage door opener, causing the gates to spring to life. They opened with a creak and a groan. “Outward and onward.”

Gordon pulled out of the camp and headed back toward the city. “We don’t have many more runs to Dallas. It’s about picked dry.”

“And overrun.” Ash agreed.

“So.” Dean said, leaning close to Pheli. “What’s this about?”

“I wanted to wear the cute thigh holster.” She said, deadpanned.

“Oh, sure. Of course.” He said, not sounding at all convinced.

They sat in silence for a few minutes, before he poked her leg.

“God, what?”

“I go by Dean, actually.”

Pheli glared at him. “Was this your plan all along? Trap me in the backseat so I can’t run from you? You want to ask about her. We just talked yesterday. I said...”

“You said you’d talk to her. Did you?”

“She isn’t ready, Dean.”

“Isn’t ready for what?” He asked, weakly. “If you haven’t noticed the world is ending.” He said, gesturing to the wreckage outside the Jeep. “We are on sort of limited time here.”

Pheli sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose. “It’s not my place to tell you. It’s hers, if she wants to.” She said low enough for only him to hear it.

In the front seat Ash sang along to some old cassette tape that was jammed in the Jeep’s radio. It was loud enough to drown them out. She just hoped Gordon wasn’t paying attention.

“I don’t wanna lose her again.”

“You two are so fucking frustrating, you know?”

“Try being a part of it.” He said with a dry laugh, scratching the back of his head.

“We need to cut your hair.”

“What? The long hair is only cute on Sam?” He teased.

“Yes actually.”

“Hurtful, Phel. You’ve got a mean streak. Who would’ve known?”

Gordon turned down the radio and glanced at Dean and Pheli in the rear view mirror. “We are approaching our drop point. We will split in groups of two. Ash has maps of the places around the block that need to be searched and what’s expected to be found in each place. We have a list of supplies that we need, but if you see anything worthwhile grab it. And Ash that doesn’t include skin mags and more ball caps.”

“You have to have culture to have a functioning society, Gordon, you snob.” Ash complained.

“Everyone has been issued a watch. We are staying an hour. That means that when we exit the Jeep, it will be rolling out in sixty minutes. With or without all of us, so make sure you’re back and buckled in before that hour is up. If not, I hope you’re a good runner, because you’ll be footing it back to camp. Keep your guard up, and try not to shoot unless you have to. Sound attracts them. Any questions?”

“Just one.” Pheli said, leaning around the seat.

“What is it?”

“I want to team up with you.”

Gordon shrugged. “Fine.”

“Aw, my ego is fucking bruised, sister.” Dean complained.

“Don’t sister me, Winchester.”

“Alright get your fucking head in the game team.” Gordon said, pulling into downtown. Ash handed the maps along with the packs that were required to make the run.

“Everyone has the same list.” Ash explained. “Just get what you can. Use common sense and you’ll be fine.” He offered a smile before the Jeep rolled to a stop.

“Sixty minutes.” Gordon said, making eye contact with Ophelia in the mirror. “Let’s go.”

****

Emerson stretched out in bed, reaching out and missing her sisters warmth next to her. “Phel..” She groaned sleepily. When she didn’t get a response, she sat up slowly. The tent was empty.

She rubbed her eyes and stood up, still crouching so her head didn’t graze the top of the tent, and she wrapped her blanket around her. She expected to find her sister cuddled up with Sam, or getting her morning coffee. Pheli was all about her beauty sleep, but ever since the incident with Gordon neither girl was able to sleep well.

She poked her head out of the tent. The camp was quiet, still lulled in the early moments of morning.

She felt dead most of the time. Like Gordon reached up inside of her and pulled out the part of her that was human. The part of her that was alive. She wondered if it was how the Rogue’s felt. Sometimes she felt like she was on autopilot, just doing what was expected. She smiled when it was required, even though it never reached her eyes. She knew that Pheli had to see it, but she didn’t comment on it. She was giving Emerson space and that was truly all she could ask for. She’d successfully dodged Dean since that last moment that they had with Lisa. She couldn’t stand it, looking into his warm green eyes. She couldn’t have him look at her like he wanted to see the sky within her, because the fucking sky was dark. There were no more stars. There was no moon. There was nothing but darkness.

She squinted at the camp. The burning embers left in the fire showed the late night conversations had by old friends. It was the only sign that anyone lived there. Everything else was still.

She took advantage of the stillness to get some coffee and to just befor a bit. She wouldn’t have to act or pretend. She could just sit and fill the hole inside of her with black coffee and dark thoughts. She pulled her blanket tightly to her chest, closing herself into it, as she walked to the coffee cart. She didn’t care if it was last nights brew or if she had to brew it herself, she would suckle the caffeine and try to remember how to be a person, because every day that went by was harder and harder to remember how.

She reached the coffee stand, and picked up the insulated pitcher and poured into one of the available canteens.

“Pour me one?”

Her back stiffened and she turned to see Lisa standing with her baby strapped to her chest. “I was just up getting Ben back to sleep. He gets restless sometimes. A walk usually puts him right back down, but Mommy needs a pick me up.”

“Sure.” Emerson said, forcing a smile. She offered the canteen that she poured for herself. Suddenly coffee didn’t sound as good as it had before.

“Emerson, right?” She took the canteen, and gratefully sipped at it.

“That’s me.” She hugged her blanket around herself, like a protective layer.

“You came with Sam and Dean.”

“You’re observant.”

“You don’t like me much.”

“Very observant.”

Lisa shifted her weight, bouncing Ben. “You know Dean and me...”

“He’s all yours.” Emerson said quickly. “I won’t be standing in your way.” She caught a glimpse of little Bens freckled face, and she felt sick to her stomach.

“I don’t need your permission to pursue him.”

“But you’ve got it anyway.” She forced a smile. “Life is sometimes nice that way. I better get back to bed, Pheli will be looking for me.” She pushed past Lisa, trying to hold everything in. She was the little Dutch boy with her finger in the dam. Any minute now everything would come rushing out, and sweep her away.

“Emerson.” Lisa said, causing Em’s feet to plant in the dirt. She waited for whatever Lisa wanted to say. She didn’t know why. She didn’t owe the woman anything. She wasn’t the bad guy. She was backing down. What else was she expected to do? “It isn’t up to us, you know. Dean was always a complex man, but this part isn’t complicated. He either loves me or he doesn’t. There’s nothing else to it.”

Emerson smiled bitterly to herself. “If you really think that, you’re so much dumber than I thought.”

She didn’t wait for a response, and made her way back to her tent. She didn’t make it a habit of shitting on other women. It wasn’t the way she was raised. Women were allies. They had to stick together, but this time... this time was too much for her. She didn’t have the patience to rise above. She’d lost enough.

She curled up in her blankets, pulling them over her head. She sat under there, and she pulled out her bag. She dug all the way to the bottom and pulled out a notebook and her pen. It was getting close to the end of the notebook. Time had gotten away from her. She clicked the pen a few times, before flipping to an open page.

Dear Dean,

I want to go find you. I want to walk over to your tent, pull you out of bed, and shake you until you understand. I need you to understand. More than anything I need things to be different. I need all of this to not have happened. I’ve coped. Haven’t you watched me cope all this time? I got over you. (Am I seriously trying to lie? Way to go, Em) I was a kid when this all started. When I watched you walk away. But I coped. I’m still coping.

But still I want to go find you. I want to let you remind me what it feels like to be alive. He fucking hurt me, Dean. In a way a person should never have to be hurt. I thought the way that you hurt me was the worst thing I’d ever feel, but losing you... that hurt in my heart. This is different. He reached inside of me and cracked me open. He stole pieces that will not allow me to be whole ever again.

Part of me wants you to fix it. I know if I asked you to, you would crack pieces of yourself to put me back together, but what would that make me? I can’t give you what I need when I’m like this. Not when I still wake up in a cold sweat feeling his weight on me.

All I’ve ever been for you is complicated. Things have never been easy. It was never the right time. Who are we to think that this is the right time? During the fucking apocalypse, of all times. You deserve something better. You deserve what I wish I could let myself be.

I remember the night at the ocean before you left. I remember what I almost... you said you wanted it to be real. I’m not real, Dean. I’m not myself. Not anymore. I’m a shell with Emersons face. The girl you knew is dead.

I am so sorry for your loss.

Em

She closed the notebook, shutting away her letter along with dozens of others from the years that she never sent. That she never had any intention to send. The wall around her heart was complete. Brick by brick. She was a princess in a tower of her own design. A tower with no escape hatch and even when the prince came... she would not let down her hair. She would ignore his calls and pray to a god that wasn’t listening that he would go away. That he will finally leave her to her poison thoughts and shackles. That he would finally leave her alone with the greatest monster of all, herself.

****

Pheli’s bag weighed heavily on her shoulders as she climbed a set of stairs behind Gordon. They spent the first forty-five minutes finding most things on the list. She’d scored with a huge bottle of low grade pain killers and several canned goods. There was soap and clean underwear tucked in the bottom of her bag. Gifts for Emerson. After everything was over Pheli wanted to burn her old ones. Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust.

Gordon wasn’t in a chatty mood. Every time Pheli tried to get him to talk to her long enough to get anything from him, he would just grunt and move on to the next aisle. She was getting really fucking tired of it.

“So where are you from, Gordon?”

“Doesn’t matter. That’s all gone now. Look for some honey. Cas likes it.”

Pheli’s eyes narrowed as he rounded a corner to of sight. He knew she was circling him.

“Is there really more stuff up this high?” She asked, gripping the railing as they ascended the stair’s, climbing higher and higher.

“There’s somethin important up here.” He grunted out.

He unlatched the door, swinging it open. His boot crunched as he passed through the threshold. She followed him, stepping into the sunlight. They were on the roof. She frowned and turned to him, watching him latch the door again, locking them up there together.

She crossed her arms. “What the fuck are you doing, Gordon?”

“I’m not stupid, Ophelia. You volunteered because you have something to say to me. So have at it.”

“You presumptuous fuck.”

“Oh so you don’t have anything to say? I sleep with your sister and you don’t care. Great. I was worried that there was something off with you two, but maybe not.”

Bile rose in Pheli’s throat. It stung and bubbled like the rage within her. “You...You...”

“I fucked her. Yeah, I know. It was okay.” He shrugged. “Can’t be too picky around here.”

“You son of a bitch. You raped her.”

“She was flirting with me all night.” He said flatly, approaching Pheli slowly enough that she wasn’t preparing against it. “What was I supposed to do?”

“Leave her alone when she said no.”

“Gotta repopulate the human race. Can’t be so picky.” He shrugged smugly.

“And you can sleep at night with that logic?”

“Like a baby.”

It was so fucking wrong. It was wrong that he didn’t feel an ounce of guilt, while Emerson cried in her sleep. It was disgusting. She didn’t feel sick anymore. Her skin was hot, and she could hear her heartbeat in her ears. It wooshed like the sound of waves at the ocean.

“You fucking men think you can do whatever you want.” She said, closing the space between them.

He reached forward, pushing a loose hair behind her ear. “We don’t think, Princess.” He leaned in to her ear. “We know.”

Something possessed Ophelia in that moment. The girl who was made of cinnamon sugar got a hint of cayenne. Something sparked in her. Maybe it was his hot breath against her neck, or the smug sound of his voice, but something overwhelmed her. It was like she was watching her body from above as she grabbed the back of his neck and slammed her forehead into his, knocking him backwards.

He was taken off guard and he stumbled. Her head pounded in response, but her adrenaline kept her moving forward, her self defense class she took in college bubbling up to the surface. She pulled back and kicked him square in the chest, her leg aching from the strain in her muscle as he fell directly on his back.

His head smacked the concrete of the roof, and he looked up at her shock present on his full lips and wide eyes. “You’re going to regret that, you bitch!”

“I already do.” She said, pressing the heel of her boot to his throat. He gasped in response. “I regret not hitting you sooner. I think you’ve seriously made me stupider since I had to listen to you talk. Is it contagious, Gordon?”

He gurgled, unable to respond due to the boot pressed firmly against his Adam’s apple. He clawed at it, but she had the upper hand. “Tsk tsk. Better not. It doesn’t take much pressure at all to break that little ball in your throat. I wonder what the survival rate of that is in a post apocalyptic world?” She smiled, saying it all a little too sweetly, as she pulled his gun off the holder on his belt. She tossed it away, and it clanked as it skipped across the ground.

She pulled her shot gun off her shoulder and loaded it, cocking it into place with a sharp click. “Get on your fucking knees, and don’t try anything funny.” She said, removing her foot.

He immediately gasped, clawing at his throat as a breath flowed back through him.

“Now, you son of a bitch. Knees!”

He complied, climbing up to his knees. She pressed the shot gun barrel to his head, directly between his eyes. “No.” He muttered between snotty tears. His hands came up in front of his chest, his palms facing her in surrender. “D...don’t do it. I’ll apologize.”

“But you aren’t sorry, Gordon. That’s the problem. People like you just take what they fucking want no matter what the cost. You hurt my sister.”

“I did.” He sobbed, his voice trembling. Clear snot rolled down out of his nose and onto his lip.

There was no satisfaction for Pheli in his tears.

“You have to pay for that Gordon.”

“You aren’t a killer, Ophelia. Don’t do this.”

She laughed, causing the barrel of the gun to tremble against his skull. The cool metal leaving an indention on his skin. “Maybe not, but there’s no law anymore. There’s no justice. There are just people and monsters. The people kill the monsters, and from the little time I’ve known you, it’s pretty obvious to me what side you’re on.”

“I’m not a monster! I... I will be a better man...I’ll...”

“It’s too late for that, Gordon.” Pheli said, a tear rolling down her cheek. “Make peace with whatever god you believe in.”

There was something tragic about the loss of innocence. The loss of faith in humanity. The loss of hope. Pheli stared down the length of her shotgun and said goodbye to the part of her that was human. Because he was right. She wasn’t a killer, but if it was between her sister and her innocence it was an easy pick.

She wouldn’t be the girl with flowers in her hair anymore, but maybe that was okay. Maybe it was time for her to retire her braids and grow the fuck up.

She pulled the gun off his skin, just back far enough.

“Please...” He begged, as her finger rested on the trigger. “I had a sister, too. I lost her. I lost her. I lost...”

Bang!

—————

Chapter Seventeen

Get caught up!

Tag List:

@purpleskiesandcherrypies

@hanaissupergirl

@deans-baby-momma

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[queen-scribbles]

Just a Suggestion

For @pillarspromptsweekly​ 66: Gratitude. Anyone object to ridiculous amounts of borderline cheesy Ederity fluff? No? Excellent. :D 

It was finally here.

All the excruciatingly long days had passed, ticked off with glee at each sunset. All the preparations had been made, everything would be taken care of. There wasn’t anything left to do but get on with it.

Tavi ran through her mental checklist one last time to make sure she had everything before securing the buckles on her pack. All set. She stepped out of the room, pack slung over one shoulder, and pulled the door closed behind her She was off for Dyrford. Well, as soon as she talked to Keya she would be.

Fortunately, teal-haired orlans weren’t that difficult to track down. Especially when they were perched on the top rail of the training yard fence, yelling encouragement at the pair sparring within.

“Keya!” Tavi hollered as she approached, and she obligingly swung around.

When she saw who was calling, she barked a Keep at it! to the sparing guards and hopped down to greet Tavi. “You heading out, Watcher?”

“Yep,” Tavi said, unable to hide her grin of anticipation. “I just wanted to thank you again for always bein’ willin’ to take over here when I get restless.”

“Or when you wanna go play matchmaker?” Keya added with a wink as she crossed her arms.

“It worked, didn’t it?” Tavi laughed. “But yes. Then, too. I really appreciate havin’ the freedom to get away when I want.”

“No problem,” Keya shrugged. “You sure as shit pay me well enough, and I like it here. I’m happy to keep it runnin’ smooth when you’re gone.” She smirked.  “‘Specially now that all the men know I could kick their asses in my sleep an’ don’t give me lip anymore.”

Tavi raised an eyebrow. “That was a problem?”

“Only the first time,” Keya waved it off. “Showed I knew what I was doin’ and wouldn’t stand for grumblin’ and it all worked out. Might still get the occasional cat-fucker from more uncouth and unsettled petitioners who weren’t expecting to find an orlan in charge, but all of Caed Nua’s men are solid. No worries, boss.” She grinned and flicked one narrow braid back toward its dozen-odd fellows.  “Go have fun and bask in the glory of bein’ right.”

“An excellent plan,” Tavi laughed, jostling the pack to a more comfortable position. “See you in about a week, Key. I told the cook all your favorite dishes that I can remember, so you can at least eat good food while shoulderin’ the burden of leadership.”

Keya’s eyes lit up. “And that’s why I like workin’ for you. Thank you for that, and see you ‘round.” She gave a final, confirming nod before turning back to the sparring match.

Tavi watched for a minute, grinning as Kya offered advice and encouragement, and then set off for Dyrford Village and a day she’s been looking forward to for months.

-o- -o- -o- -o- -o-

Tavi had, for this visit, insisted she was staying at the Dracogen. Charity protested--they had fun when Tavi stayed at her place, she didn’t mind, it made more sense--but Tavi held firm. To her, it made more sense to let Charity have the house to herself one more night before she had to share it forever. No amount of cajoling on Charity’s part could change her mind. She even went so far as to prearrange with Dengler and Peycg to hold a room for her.

She was very glad for this arrangement when she reached Dyrford and found the Dracogen full to bursting with a large adventuring party. They were apparently bound for Clîaban Rilag, to hear their braggart leader talk, and none too happy some of them would have to double up. It was the kind of group Hiravias would have torn apart single-handed, if they didn’t piss themselves and run away, so Tavi could only imagine what a group of Glanfathans who caught them trespassing would do. She might have felt more sympathetic regarding the rude awakening that awaited them if said braggart leader wasn’t currently trying to bully Peycg into giving her group all the rooms with no current occupants.

Bullying Peycg--or trying to--was stupid as the day was long, and she could more than handle herself, but Tavi still made a show of sidling up and asking Dengler for the key to her room, “seein’ as your wife is busy” with a shit-eating grin.

Dengler matched her grin as he handed over the key. “It’s that corner one y’like, away from the currier’s.”

The braggart’s eyes flashed fury as she put a face to the kith who’d nicked one of the best rooms in the inn before her company arrived. Tavi ignored her, thanked Dengler, waved a greeting to Peycg, and headed for the stairs. Hopefully those copperfuckers wouldn’t be around long. She’d hate for something like them to ruin Edér and Charity’s wedding.

The anticipation washed over her again in a giddy rush, and her grin shifted to one of pure joy as she hastily dropped her pack on the bed and headed out to visit Charity.

-o- -o- -o- -o- -o-

It was a good thing the thought occurred to check the Berathian temple before walking all the way out to Charity’s farm, because that was where Tavi found her. The redhead was twirling the end of her ponytail with one hand while the other gestured animatedly as she talked with Harbinger Boedmar.

“...not askin’ people to sit still for that long, Harbinger. ‘Specially for pageantry. We just want the meat of it, we told you that,” she said emphatically. 

“But people will expect a certain level of ceremony, him being the mayor-” Boedmar tried.

“I wouldn’t care if he was the damn duc,” Charity cut him off. “We don’t want anything but what’s necessary; the vows and such.” She smiled wryly. “It’s my weddin’, Boedmar, and I don’t wanna stand in front of people for three blazin’ hours.”

“I see your point,” the  old priest finally relented with a laugh. “And he is a very to the point sort of man, so I suppose people will understand.”

“Thank you.” Charity caught sight of Tavi and flashed a smile as she excused herself from their conversation. She quickly crossed to where Tavi waited. “And thank you for for an escape from that conversation.”

“You’re welcome,” Tavi said with a chuckle. “Though hearin’ the end of your conversation, I feel it’s a fair trade for you gettin’ us guests out of a three fuckin’ hour long ceremony.”

Charity snorted. “You’re also welcome, but that’s as much for us as for everyone else. And hang anyone who doesn’t understand.”

Tavi raised an eyebrow. “That’s usually vehement for you. Is it just weddin’ stress or...?”

“Mostly,” Charity admitted with a sigh. “There’s a lot of planning, and I’ve been doin’ most of it ‘cause Edér gotta be mayor--he helps as much as he can, don’t get me wrong,” she added hastily. “Mostly back rubs and hugs when I get too stressed. But I’m still handlin’ the bulk of it.” She fiddled with her necklace, zipping the pendent back and forth on the chain. “Beyond that, though... we’re already compromisin’ enough; getting married in Berath’s temple by Berath’s priest. They can give us a tolerable ceremony length.” A smirk pulled at her lips. “Can you imagine if we’d said we wanted a ‘proper’ Eothasian wedding?”

Tavi rolled her eyes and huffed a laughed. “They prob’ly would run you both out of town on the fuckin’ rails, regardless of how much they like his mayorin’. Are you alright doin’ it this way?”

Charity shrugged. “In a perfect world, Waidwen wouldn’t have been such an ass and made people look down on Eothasians so we could do this the way we want,” she said in an undertone, as Boedmar was still scuttling around putting the last touches on his sanctuary. “But since it ain’t perfect, we make the compromises we need. All that really matters, to both of us, is that we love each other and we get to be married.” She grinned and steered Tavi toward the door. “Which, by the way, from the bottom of my heart, thank you for that.”

“Me?” Tavi feigned innocence as they exited the temple. “Why me?”

“Aside from you being a very good friend to both of us, always willing to help or give advice, and the nudge we needed to pick a damn date and get things moving toward this?” Charity said, ticking off points on her fingers and gesturing toward the temple doors. “All of which I greatly appreciate, mind you. If memory serves, you were the one to suggest we pretend to court in the first place. To cover why he was visitin’ me so much.”

“Oh, that’s right,” Tavi said dramatically(as if she could’ve forgotten. Of all the plans she’d conceived in her life, that one had far and away been the most successful). “Well, you’re welcome for that.”

“No, seriously, Tavi.” Charity pulled her to a stop just aside from the temple steps. “I love him so damn much, and he loves me back, and we are so unspeakably, incandescently happy, and it only happened because of your suggestion.” She took Tavi’s hands in hers and squeezed them fervently. “I don’t know how we... how I can ever repay you.”

“Oh, trust me,” Tavi replied, pretty sure she was grinning like an idiot. “Seein’ you two happy together is more than enough for me. And y’know... I don’t know everything involved with an Eothasian wedding, but you’re a priest, right? Couldn’t the two of you do a quick, y’know abbreviated one in the morning before the ‘official’ Berathian ceremony?” Charity was staring at her, mouth slightly agape, so she pressed on. “It’s just a suggestion, since I know your faith is real fuckin’ important to both of y-”

Charity let go of Tavi’s hands and yanked her into a hug tight enough to knock the wind from her. “Tavi, you’re a genius!”

“Happy to help,” Tavi managed, smiling to herself as she patted the other woman on the back. Auroch’s shadow, how and when did I forget how fuckin’ strong she is?

“No, really, that’s blazing brilliant,” Charity said eagerly as she let go. “Can’t believe neither of us thought of it. I’m gonna go talk it over with Edér.” She gestured vaguely toward the mayor’s office. “Can you check with Dengler or Peycg that everything’s going alright with the food?” She started off, then spun back. “Oh, if Edér likes the idea, will you be our witness?”

Tavi laughed and nodded. “Of course.” She trolled back toward the Dracogen, hoping fervently that the adventuring company had all retreated to their rooms to talk business or something. So long as they weren’t around when she talked to Peycg or Dengler. And anyway, the sooner they were moved on the better.

Luck was with her, and the only people she could see when she entered were a couple locals, Sid, and Dengler minding the counter.

“Just the man I wanted to talk to,” Tavi said brightly, hastening across the room anf plunking down at a counter seat. “Charity asked me to confirm everything’s goin’ alright with the food.”

“Oh, aye,” Dengler nodded. He leaned forward with a wink and a conspiratorial grin. “Peycg has all but adopted that girl, and she’s mighty fond of Mayor Teylecg, too. You think she’s gonna let anything bad happen to the food for their weddin’?” He scrubbed a stubborn stain and laughed. “Effigy himself would have to deal with my wife if he tried anything.”

Tavi laughed with him, greatly enjoying the mental image of Peycg fending off Skaen from disrupting the wedding. She’d do it, too, Tavi had no doubts. “Well, that’s good to hear. I’m glad Charity and Edér have so determined a guardian in charge of the meal. I’ll bet it’s fuckin’ delicious, too, if the food I’ve had from here is any indication.”

“Oh, aye, what we serve on the regular is a fair example of Peycg’s cookin’,” Dengler nodded. “The folks here about are in for a treat.”

“Bet most of ‘em know it, too.” Tavi bit her lip and picked at a chip in the counter. “Can’t wait for that party. I’m gonna go find Charity again, confirm everything’s good here and see what else I can do to help.”

“She’s right lucky to have a friend like you,” Dengler winked.

Tavi shrugged, but her cheeks still warmed at the compliment. “I did kinda nudge ‘em together, so I feel some responsibility to help this go smoothly.”

“Ah, so you’re the one we need to thank,” Peycg emerged from the kitchen, grinning like the cat who got in the cream. “I was plannin’ to do some nudging myself, then they wised up and started courtin’. I wondered if they got there on their own or had some help.”

It was a fucking miracle she kept a straight face. “Yep, I nudged. Pretty hard, truth be told. May have straight up told ‘em to fuckin’ court. Glad it worked. But since I am here a day early specifically to help the bride, I should go see if she needs me.”

“Course, Watcher. See you at the weddin’.” Peycg waved farewell and ducked back into the kitchen.

Grinning big, Tavi pushed awau from the counter and headed off to find Charity again.

-o- -o- -o- -o- -o-

It took more work than she expected. Charity wasn’t at Edér’s house, or the mayor’s office, or any of the other places Tavi thought she’d find her. She finally all but bumped into the woman near Winfrith’s shop.

“There you are!” they said in unison and near-matching levels of relief.

“I know why I’m glad to see you,” Tavi chuckled. “I checked with Dengler and the food’s all comin’ along great and will be ready right when you need it.”

“Good, that’s... good,” Charity muttered, sounding distracted. One hand zipped her pendent back and forth on its chain. “Tavi, how good are you at fixing hair?”

Tavi blinked and fought the urge to snort. “Shit, Charity, you know what mine’s always like. And I didn’t have any sisters to practice on or anything. Why?”

“Oh, Hendyna was supposed to do my hair tomorrow, but, um, she can’t now.” Charity tugged on the pendent hard enough Tavi worried she might snap the chain. “She was fillin’ an order and spilled some acid concoction that burned her hand. It wasn’t too bad, and I got her all patched up, but now her hand’s all stiff and she can’t fix my hair.”

Tavi raised an eyebrow. “You do know you could prob’ly do that messy bun you use for workin’ in the garden an’ Edér would still think you’re fuckin’ gorgeous, right?”

Charity blushed, but bit her lip and nodded. “I just feel like I should do something a little fancier for my damn wedding.”

“A fair point.” Tavi huffed out a sigh, blowing her bangs out of her face. “I can try, I guess? But I make no promises an’ you might wanna have a back-up idea that you can do yourself.”

“That’s all I can ask,” Charity said, shoulders slumping in relief. “You’re the best, Tavi.”

“I know,” Tavi joked with a roguish smirk. “What did Edér think of the, uh, idea?” They were in public, she didn’t want to give anything away.

“Oh, right.” Charity’s smile blossomed like the sun. “He thinks you’re a genius, too. I think we’re gonna do it.”

“Does this mean I hafta be out at your place at the asscrack of dawn?” Tavi asked, eyes narrowing.

Charity shrugged, smile shifting faux-innocent. “You could just stay in my blazin’ guest room, then you’d already be there.”

“No,” Tavi said emphatically. “I told you, I’m lettin’ you have the place to yourself your last night as a single woman. Edér must’ve told you how stubborn I am, if you managed to miss it yourself; I ain’t changin’ my mind. Even if it means gettin’ up at the asscrack of dawn for you two.”

Charity gave another shrug, caving with some reluctance. “Alright, suit yourself. I’ll stop askin’.”

“It’s more than not inconveniencin’ you now,” Tavi said hastily to reassure her. “I am inconveniencin’ those copperfuckin’ adventurers who wanted to take over the Dracogen, and that’s just too damn fun to give up.”

“Ah, well, in that case I understand,” Charity laughed. “That does sound like something you’d enjoy.”

Tavi flashed a wide grin. “So, whaddya need from me, aside from servin’ as witness at your”--she dropped her voice to a whisper--“secret dawn wedding?”

Charity rolled her eyes. “Right now, before I can focus on anything else for today, I need a drink. Just one, not even alcoholic. Just wanna breathe for a minute. Let myself be giddy instead of stressed about tomorrow.”

“One breather comin’ right up,” Tavi said, and tugged her toward the Dracogen. “If anyone deserves it, you do. Well, you and Edér, but I can’t do anything about the mayor shit. We’ll relax for a bit, chat, and then get back to business.” 

Charity nodded. “Sounds like a plan.”

She insisted on paying for their drinks, as “one small thank you” for everything Tavi had done. Tavi let her--she’d never been one to turn down free drinks. But she’d been completely serious before; her real reward was going to come tomorrow.

And she couldn’t fuckin’ wait.