#rosie who i share a brain with apparently your ideas are so incredibly based

[pwurrz]

i have such talented oomfs and moots??? some people who draw art so good it just makes me admire them and feel instantly inspired to draw??? others who write fanfiction so good it should be a published new york times best seller???? absolutely insane people who are capable of both???? yall are awesome i love yall so much <333 /p

[wesker20]

Fallen Hero 1.5 Episode 5: Let's play Little Voice

It’s like the world is out to get you. Every time, every single time you think you finally got what you wanted, the world decides to rip it out of your hands as some sort of cruel joke. And you are not laughing, but rather beating this bag senseless. You’ll be surprised if Jane cannot knock someone out with one punch after this much punching the poor thing.

But something more is going on. One week has passed and you have yet to receive another call and in that time the Army has grown in size and power. They are currently one of the top gangs. But that’s not the worst of it, oh no. The worst of it is that it is someone from your past, a past you have long decided to forget. But alas it has come back and you are not having it. Just last night you remembered, the memory of how it used to be, how you used to be, how you got your name… the name she gave you.

Alpha, Kappa, Zeta… your original team, your brother and sisters, your family. A family you destroyed by treating them as such. You shouldn’t have, you knew it was wrong, you knew that it could get you and them killed or worst, but you kept going, treating them as your family, challenging the general and the other higher ups. Trevor never really cared, to her as long as you were useful you could behave however you pleased, she even seemed to approve and encourage it. But you knew, you knew you were not supposed to act like that, like a person. It was all your fault.

You throw another punch that hits harder than the rest, and it seems Jane’s body is starting to catch up with you. You take a breather and drink a bottle of water, sitting not far from the boxing training ground of the gym. You rest long enough to hear another person punching another bag not far from yours. There you see a young woman, not very tall, long black hair, and a thin physique. She punches the bag with a lot of rage and frustration, almost like she’s venting, just like you. You also notice a bit of bandage around her back and neck.

“You know that poor bag is not going to last that much longer if you keep that up,” you say to get her attention. She turns around looking for the source of the voice and when she notices no one else but you she turns back to punch.

“Look who’s talking. I arrived while you were still punching that one to hell,” she shoots back. Not complete dismissal but you notice a bit of annoyance in her voice.

“Yeah well you know what they say, do as I say not as I do.”

“Heh, can’t argue with you there.”

You stand up and walk to her, paying close attention to how she moves and punches. She’s decent, but nowhere near as good as some of the other people you have seen here. Her technique is strong but predictable, a good base but nothing you use seriously. Overall, someone who has just began fighting and is still learning.

“Ok, strengthen that stance. Anybody with half a brain cell will take you down faster than you can say shit,” you tell her, wondering why the hell you bother. She turns and looks at you with one eyebrow raised. Yet she doesn’t say anything and does as you say. You were waiting for some back sass but surprise, surprise you did not get it. You walk around and behind the back to hold it in place.

“So, problems in paradise?” you ask, trying to begin conversation.

“Something like that. You?” she says a bit suspicious but no longer annoyed.

“Something like that. A couple of problems have sprung up, making my life hell,” you answer, giving a bit more than she does.

She looks at you, indecision in her eyes. If you had to guess, she’s considering whether to share or not. “I made a stupid mistake, and that got… it hurt someone I cared,” she finally says and goes back to punch the bag.

You empathize with her, against your better judgment. “And now you are punching this poor bag to see if something comes up,” you say with a smile.

“Speaking from experience?” she asks now smiling.

“Oh, incredibly so.”

“Does it ever work?”

“Sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn’t,” you answer with a mix of sarcasm and frightening hidden honesty.

“I sometimes think it’s a waste of time. But then…” she doesn’t finish. You decide to finish it for her.

“But then something kicks your ass down and this is the only thing you are left with.” She looks at you with a soft smile and then chuckles.

“I was going to go say shit hits the fan, but sure, that works too.”

“Does it have to do with that bandage on your neck?” you decide to tackle that now.

“What?” she says with almost surprise. “Oh this, no. This was… just me being stupid. I heated the shower a bit too much.”

Your eyes slightly narrow on her. “Ouch, that had to hurt.”

“Like hell,” she whispers and rubs it lightly. You can’t tell what’s on her mind but you see a faint grimace. She finally raises her sight and stretches her hand. “I’m Emily by the way.”

You give yours and shake hands with her. “Jane. You come here often?”

“Actually I used to go somewhere else but, well, let’s just say it had a terrible case of being the center of a fight.”

Yeah, those happen a lot. The media only really reports what happens in the city, or when a famous hero and/or villain is involved. Smaller places get trashed all the time without anybody realizing it. “Who were the participants?” you ask as you two move away from the punching bag.

“Red Doll and some guy named Traxis.”

You ignore the surging feeling of satisfaction growing within you. “Oh, you mean that heroine that was on the news recently?”

She tries to hide it but you notice a small cough. “Yeah, that’s the one.”

“Never heard of the other guy though,” you mention.

“And you probably won’t. He’s currently living on the prison for boosts at the edge of Los Diablos,” she says standing her chest and chin up and proud.

You chuckle as you begin to dress. “Well that’s one less criminal on the streets. Now she just has to deal with the other ninety nine thousand.”

“Yeah, she does.”

You prepare to go and bid farewell to Emily. “Thanks for the chat. I needed it.”

“You and me both. You’ll come back here?”

“Might as well. It’s not far away from where I live.”

You swallow a chuckle. “Well then. When I come back I’ll see if I teach you a couple of other things.”

“Yes please, I need it.”

You leave the gym, thinking about what just happened. You guess it was about time something went your way. You are about eighty percent sure who she is. Still it’s better to wait out a bit, make sure you are one hundred percent right on this; that you just met and befriended Red Doll.

The Hide out

You arrive just in time to have Rosie bombard you with questions. All of them boiling down to ‘what the hell are you going to about the army.’

“I have no idea,” you finally answer. They stare at you dumbfounded.

“Well then let’s ask the boss. They’ll know what to do,” Nehal says in her ever defiant and impatient manner.

“Mastermind is handling other things. For now we wait,” you say, purposely forgetting to tell them about the caller. You don’t know who from your past is after you, and the last thing you need is your crew finding out about you. You are still not sure if to share it with them.

“What!” both Zaza and Nehal say at the same time.

“The more we leave those fuckers, the more they going to spread and smear their name,” Nehal says with Zaza nodding right behind her.

Rosie steps in in your defense and says “Now settle down. When the boss’s not here, Jane’s the boss. And if she says we wait, we wait.”

“Like hell we are. Nehal’s right, those assholes need to be taken down a peg or two,” Zaza barges in.

“If we just barge in blindly, we’ll lose, just like last time,” Pelayo finally steps in, always calm and collected.

“But we can’t-“ Nehal begins but you shut her up immediately.

“As Pelayo said, we can’t just barge in. For now, we wait.” You eye Nehal as she crosses her arms and looks the other way. You walk towards her and close the distance, standing over her. combining the five foot nine of Jane with the plain five foot of Nehal, you look like a giant next to her, which enhances your point. “Unless you have something to say Nehal?”

She stares at you in defiance at first but in a couple of seconds it changes to fear and submission. “No ma’am.”

You turn away from her and address the rest of the team. “Listen up, I know how angry you all are over what happened, trust me I’m just as pissed off about as you are. But right now, they are a bit too big for us. That said they are getting attention. A lot of attention, that includes some big fishes who hate wild ones like the Army.” They all look at you with interest. You, Jane, smiles. Rosie asks what are you talking about and you oblige. “A certain someone hates trouble makers, and the army is a trouble maker.”

Late afternoon, parking lot

You never expected to have to deal with him. Ok, no, you expected to deal with him eventually. But not like this, not actually asking for help. Asking help from Hollow Ground. You spent all week talking to your contacts, asking if they had heard anything at all about the Army or some new player, but no one knew anything. The Army of Mastermind apparently sprung up from nothing, and no one has heard anything about a new player. Whoever this is, they know how to cover their tracks, which leaves you with nothing because everyone from your past knew how to cover their tracks. So you are left with this, contacting one of Hollow Grounds men to grant you information, for whatever price they might ask.

“Good afternoon Miss,” you hear and turn around to see an old man dressed formally. You wonder if he is supposed to be Hollow Ground’s butler or something similar.

“Jane will do,” you answer him as you two shake hands. Instantly you can tell this guy is a mod, his handshake being pretty strong and cold, like Steel’s.

“Of course Miss Jane. I heard your employer was interested in information from mine.”

“Name your price,” you respond with the softest of smiles, never letting it show what you are thinking.

“That is actually what I wanted to discuss,” he says. You can’t read him.

“Really? Is there a problem?”

“Not at all. You see my employer has certain sensibilities when it comes to new groups. Your employer has yet to prove themselves a problem. This “Army” had proven themselves worse.”

You look at him trying to figure out his game. You get nothing from his face but you can see the suggestion coming a mile away. “So for now, consider this information a gift from my employer to yours.”

Gift? You feel more like it’s a favor. Which means you’ll owe him. Shit. “How kind of your employer. I’ll make sure to pass it on to mine.”

“Indeed. Now to what you came here for.” He hands you over a folder. You open it up and eye it up. “To summarize its contents, someone is after your employer. Someone who knows how to hide and has been working from the shadows for years.”

Your eyes open wide and you look up to him. “Years?” since when? Since your first escape? Or since your second? Have they always been watching you?

“Indeed. They made the Army, though the gang did not named itself that until after your employer’s little… tour to the museum.”

Shit. Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. They were planning this, somehow they knew what you were planning. “Is that all?”

“More details are on the files, but that’s the gist of it. You will find several whispers and rumors that not everyone on the underworld have heard. A pleasure doing business with you,” he finishes and puts on a hat as he walks away. He stops and turns to you and says “By the way, if anything were to happen to your employer, know that mine has an open seat for you, Miss Jane.” He tips his hat to you and goes, leaving you alone to ponder about what little you have learned.

You proceed to walk away from the lot, preparing to head home. Watch out, behind you! You instantly duck as you feel the rush of air from something going over you. You roll away and take a stance. Four thugs stand in front of you, all armed with armed, one with a bat, one with a crowbar, one with a chain, and another with a knife. “Hey, pretty face. Sorry we are going to have to beat you up. Nothing personal.”

You wonder if this was Hollow Ground, but somehow you doubt that this is his style. “You are surely welcome to try. Warning though, I’m not afraid of beating up children,” you say with a devilish smile. The four of them rush but you knew they were going to do it, just as you know the one with the bat will strike first and the one with the knife will come second. The one with the chain will try to sneak up behind you to choke you with his chain, and the one with the crowbar will attack you from the side.

You know each and every single one of their moves before they happen, not like how you used to do as Sidestep but more like you have seen it already happen before. They think that they are the dangerous ones, but they are wrong. They are not the danger, you are. You’ll show them exactly how and why you are Mastermind’s second in command, why he would send you all alone without protection.

They try to strike you but they fail, they fail and you retaliate, punching them with the same strength that you used in the morning, while beating up the bag. They stumble back and try to strike you again, but you see them coming, all the time. They are not fighters, or even adults, they are children, small kids compared to you. Time and again they aim and attack and time and again they fail. You soon take the guy’s crowbar and hit him in the head with it. The four retreat for a moment, staring at you with shock and fear.

You stare at them while smiling. “What’s the matter? Don’t tell me you are already scared. I’m barely even getting started.” You don’t know what this is. This pleasure you are having. You want to see them on the ground, bloodied and beaten, begging for their lives while you stare down at them smiling like only a devil could.

They try to run away but you rush them, swinging your crowbar with deadly precision. Some of them try to hit you again but like before they fail. Only these attacks aren’t meant to kill or hurt, but merely delay. They are attacking out of desperation. Good, that’s what you want. Beat them down, have no mercy, they tried to do the same to you, they are nothing. Idiotic children who have failed to live in this world. Beat them, destroy them. Their attacks are nothing, you can see them before they happen. Like a blur you move and stab one of them with the crowbar, the one with the knife. As he lets go of it, you position yourself to let it fall on your hand.

You are barely even trying at this point, you could just sit back and relax. Yes, relax. Sit back and let me handle this. These thugs are unworthy of fighting you. The knife moves in blurs, cutting bit by bit every single one of them. You, she, could easily cut their necks, let them bleed to death, but where’s the fun in that? No, you want them to suffer.

In a couple of minutes the fight is over, although the fight was over long before it began. You stand over all four of them, covered in cuts and blood. Two of them lay dead, one of them dying, and the last one still has enough strength to beg for his life.

“Please,” he whispers. You quiet him with a soft “Shhh” kneeling beside him.

“Don’t worry. You’ll go to a better place soon,” you begin as you put the blade beside his neck. “oh no wait, no you wouldn’t. There is no after this,” and with that you push the blade right into his neck and watch him as he chokes on his own blood. The other dies before you turn to him. Too bad, you would have enjoyed watching him die too.

But as you prepare to leave, you hear a cell phone. It’s coming from one of the corpses and you search it. Once you find it you answer, already expecting who will be on the other end.

“Whoa hohoho, that was incredible. A lot more brutal than I expected it to be. More brutal than when you fight as Mastermind.” Your eyes narrow at the last thing. Of course they know that too.

“So this was you? Gotta say, I’ve seen better murder attempts.”

“oh please, you wouldn’t have died. I just wanted to render that little doll of yours useless. Guess that’ll teach me.”

You smile. This idiot thinks they have you, but they are wrong, you are not a prey, you are hunter. “Indeed, that’ll teach you. That will teach you what will happen when I find you.” you hear an “oh” on the other end. Your smile grows. “You see this? This is how you will end up, bloodied, beaten. And I will be there to watch as you die. You messed with the Mastermind, time for you to meet the Hunter,” you finish and hang, not giving them a chance to retort. You throw the phone away and leave, taking the knife with you as a memento. You want to play? Let’s play little voice of my consciousness.

[sleepykittypaws]

A Timeless Christmas

Original Air Date: November 15, 2020 (Hallmark) Where to Watch?: Hallmark will replay it multiple times this season, and for every season in perpetuity

If you don't know who director Ron Oliver is, you're missing out on one of Hallmark's most delightful stars. Sure, he's behind the camera, not in front of it, and I guess people like that Ryan Paevey guy, who also made Christmas at the Plaza with Oliver last season, but, seriously, Oliver is a treasure, and I hope Hallmark knows that. From the movie-spanning mythology that is "Kenny Kwon," to just being the gosh darn best, Ron Oliver elevates every project he touches, including A Timeless Christmas, based on the (Hallmark) book by Alexis Stanton. 

Sorry, every-other-Christmas-movie, your director is definitely not this awesome.

Paevey plays Charles Whitley, an early 1900s inventor, who buys his fiancee a Christmas clock, then after repairing and winding it on Christmas Eve, wakes up to find strangers in his house, now a museum, filming him with iPhones.

Despite how jarring all this would be, Paevey's Charles seems pretty non-plussed at all the future tech, laughing at a joke about Internet cat pictures, and figuring out what a cell phone does in seconds flat, despite also being scandalized anyone would wear "dungarees" on a public street.

Erin Cahill's museum docent/Charles Whitley-maid cosplayer also is pretty quick to accept the whole, he's-a-time-traveler bit. Though not quickly enough for Paevey, who asks her at about minute 10 of the movie, “You still don't believe me, do you?” I mean, dude, you just popped into the present about 20 minutes ago, maybe give her a night to sleep on it?

The way Charles convinces Cahill's character, who did her dissertation on Whitley, he's the real guy, is via a secret scar on his hand, and a much less secret space beneath the floorboards where Charles hid a journal in 1903. I mean, seriously, no one has moved that (brand-new looking) rug in over a hundred years? Because that cut out is super obvious. Either Kenny is the worst museum director ever, or a whole slew of Charles Whitley Mansion cleaning staff need to be let go immediately.

Cahill's character repeatedly tells Charles how much the world has changed…All while they proceed to fall in love in a way that would have seemed chaste even for 1903, like decorating a Christmas tree at her parent's house, and going Christmas shopping. Oh, Hallmark, you can even make a time travel romance seem rote.

Then Cahill finally drops the big, incredibly obvious reveal that Charles' 1903 fiancee, Eliza, married his big bad business rival (scandal!) and Charles has to go for a walk in Evergreen (holy shared universe, Batman), a.k.a. Deer Lake Park in Burnaby, B.C., to recover. And, like, seriously, does Hallmark own this place now, because this is at least the third 2020 Hallmark holiday movie it makes an appearance in. Hope they just left the lights up between all the filming.

There, a magical Christmas tree decorator then explains to Charles that, no, his rival was a great guy, actually, even though he stole Charles' mill method (this is never elaborated upon), and he and Eliza lived happily ever after which…OK? Not sure why knowing his wife-to-be moved on with someone he hated would make Charles feel better, but now he doesn't have to feel guilty about falling in love with Cahill, I guess. 

Then Charles walks all the way from Evergreen to Riverdale, to have a bite to eat at Pop's Diner, and re-state the already very exposition-y lesson we'd just learned. That it took Charles longer to grasp the idea of "everyone deserves to be happy" than the concept of time travel is…something. For a genius inventor, Charles is pretty slow on the uptake. 

The whole thing hinges on this missing Christmas clock we see Charles buy at the beginning of the movie and Cahill, whose great-grandmother was Charles' maid Rosie, takes about a decade to discover it in a prominent, free-standing, clear glass case at the university we are supposed to think she's been attending for years or, at the very least, going through a lengthy academia application process at. There's basically a flashing neon sign that says "Christmas clock this way" and Cahill still takes minutes to walk by it, sit in front of it, gaze at it and then, finally, the realization dawns. Beginning to think her potential students dodged a real bullet by her not taking the teaching gig.

Then, instead of wacky clock theft hijinks I was hoping for, Cahill just asks a secretary if she can take it, and the lady says, sure, apparently, because next thing you know it's back in the museum for Christmas Eve and she thinks Charles poofed back to 1903 without a word, except, like, wouldn't the museum cease to exist if he had done that? I mean, if Charles Whitley doesn't disappear mysteriously in 1903, then the house never goes to the town to becomes a museum, and Cahill and all the partygoers would just suddenly be smack dab in the middle of some Whitley descendant’s living room, or a vacant lot, or something. And wouldn’t Cahill’s knowledge of Whitley have changed in her head, if he’d gone back to 1903? Or would she have studied him at all without the mystery? Oof, the more I think about it, the more this movie makes my brain itchy.

But, no, Charles just decides to stay in this unnamed year—everyone is very careful not to mention it's 2020, even when Charles explicitly asks what year it is, very early on—in his perfectly preserved 100-year-old tuxedo. No social security number. No ID. No job or educational history. No money. So they can't get married, he can't get a job or a bank account, or ever travel, and he'll probably be deported by ICE, and the museum shut down for paying its performers in cash under the table, but…Yay, happy ending, I guess? 

This is why, if you’re ever personally involved in a time travel romance, where one of you has to pick an era to live in forever, my advice is always to go back in time, where it’s easier to just blend in without documentation, rather than the future or our present, where everything is computerized. Just be careful not to be too prescient or savvy about things like antibiotics and natural disasters, or they’ll burn you as a witch. (Thanks for coming to my TED talk!)

Actually, in writing this, I think I might have enjoyed this movie less than I thought I did while actually watching it, but did love Nelson Wong, a.k.a. Kenny Kwon, getting the movie's last (sort of) laugh with his, "He's a pretty good Charles Whitley isn't he? You know, I'm the one who found him, right?" As always, Wong’s appearance makes any Oliver joint 47.8% better, and you can’t argue with math.

Final Judgement: 2 Paws Up