#riverfront times

[infamousbrad]

It came up, during the plague, that rider fares amount to less than 2% of Metro Transit's gross revenue; that's why they were able to board people through the rear door and skip the fares during covid. If a quarter of the riders were skipping fares (and I'm pretty confident it's less than that) it'd mean a drop in revenue of under half a percent. That's less than the random day-to-day fluctuations. It's way less than the losses to inflation. It's trivial.

(The only reason there are even token fares is to keep the unhoused from using the buses and trains as home/office space. Not that we saw anywhere near enough of that to crowd out actual transportation users during the last free-fare period, though.)

For no more actual, provable benefit than these fare gates will provide, the cost is obscene. I'd question if they were a good idea even if they were donated for free, complete with someone voluntarily paying for all the maintenance they'll need, but given that they cost $52 million (not counting future maintenance), and no more extra revenue than they'll generate? They're a seriously dumb idea.

But, they're a dumb idea that's very popular with rich campaign donors, and very popular with exurban voters who'll never go anywhere near the system even with the fare gates, they'll just move on to the next excuse, and there'll always be a next excuse.

There is no force more implacable than a Bad Idea Whose Time Has Come.

[bradrcook]

Wow! I was nominated for Best Local Author in the Riverfront Times Best of St. Louis 2023.

I would appreciate your vote.

It is an honor to be nominated and thank you to everyone who entered my name. Congratulations to my fellow nominees, check out their books.

Head to RiverfrontTimes.com to vote.

https://vote.riverfronttimes.com/arts-and-entertainment/best-local-author

[cthulhu-with-a-fez]

visited the kenilworth aquatic garden in washington dc today!! i didn't even know dc HAD an aquatic garden until i saw a little blurb on the news ticker yesterday about it and i'm super glad i went, it's GORGEOUS

[inkskinned]

i got rickrolled today but it didn't work because i have adblocker installed, so youtube just told me i violated the terms of service. yesterday i was trying to edit a picture as a joke for my girlfriend, and google made me check a box to prove i'm human because i wasn't "searching normally".

it isn't just that capitalism is killing fun and whimsy, it is that any element of entertainment or joy is being fed upon by this mosquito body, one that will suck you dry at any vulnerability.

do you want to meet new friends in your city? download this app, visit our website, sign up for our email list. pay for this class on making a terrarium, on candlemaking, on cooking. it will be 90 dollars a session. you can go to group fitness, but only under our specific gym membership. solve the puzzle, sign up for our puzzle-of-the-month-club. what is a club if not just a paid opportunity - you are all paying for the same thing, which makes you a community.

but you're like me, i know it - you're careful, you try the library meetings and the stuff at the local school and all of that. the problem is that you kind of want really specific opportunities that used to exist. you are so grateful for libraries and the publicly-funded things: they are, however, an exception - and everything they have, they've fought tooth-and-nail to protect. you read a headline about how in many other states, libraries have virtually nothing left.

do you want to meet up with your friends afterwards? gift your friends the discord app. you can choose to go to a cafe (buy a coffee, at least), a bar (money, alcohol) or you can all stay in and catch a movie (streaming) or you can all stay in bed (rent. don't get me started) and scream (noise complaint. ticket at least).

you want to read a new book, but the book has to have 124 buzzwords from tiktok readers that are, like, weirdly horny. you can purchase this audiobook on audible! your podcast isn't on spotify, it's on its own server, pay for a different site. fuck, at least you're supporting artists you like. the art museum just raised their ticket price. once, they had a temporary exhibit that acknowledged that ~85% of their permanent art galleries were from cis white men, and that they had thousands of works by women (even famous women, like frida! georgia o'keefe!) just rotting in their basement. that exhibit lasted for 3 months and then they put everything away again.

walmart proudly supports this strip of land by the street! here are some flowers with wilting leaves. its employees have to pay out-of-pocket for their uniforms. my friend once got fined by the city because she organized a community pick-up of the riverfront, which was technically private property.

no, you cannot afford to take that dance class, neither can i. by the way - i'm a teacher. i'm absolutely not saying "educators shouldn't be paid fairly." i'm saying that when i taught classes, renting a studio went from 20 bucks an hour to 180 in the span of 6 months. no significant changes to the studio were made, except they now list the place as updated and friendly. the heat still doesn't work in the building. i have literally never seen the landlord who ignores my emails. recently they've been renting it out at night as an "unusual nightclub; a once-in-a-lifetime close-knit party." they spent some of those 180 dollars on LEDs and called it renovating. the high heels they invite in have been ruining the marley.

do you want to experience the old internet? do you want to play flash games or get back the temporary joy of club penguin? you can, you just need to pay for it. i have a weird, neurodivergent obsession with occasionally checking in to watch the downfall and NFT-ification of neopets. if i'm honest with you all - i never got into webkins, my family didn't have the money to buy me a pointless elephant. people forget that "being poor" can mean literally "if i buy you that toy, i can't afford rent."

you and i don't have time to make good food, and we don't have the budget for it. we are not gonna be able to host dinner parties, we're not made of money, kid. do you want some kind of 3rd space? a space that isn't home or work or school? you could try being online, but - what places actually exist for you? tiktok counts as social media because you see other people on it, not because they actually talk to you.

there was a local winter tradition of sledding down the hill at my school. kids would use pizza boxes and jackets and whatever worked, howling and laughing. back in september, they made a big announcement that this time, rules were changing, and everyone must pay 10 dollars to participate. when im not scared shitless, i kind of appreciate the environmental irony - it hasn't gone below 40. so much for snow & joyriding.

i saw a bulletin for a local dogwalking group and, nervous about making a good first impression, showed up early. the first guy there grimaced at me. "sorry," he said. "there's a 30-dollar buy-in fee." i thought he was joking. wait. for what? the group doesn't offer anything except friendship and people with whom to walk around the city.

he didn't know the answer. just shrugged at me. "you know," he said. "these days, everything costs money."

[nightpool]

If you are an auditor, and you call up the chief financial officer of the company you are auditing and ask “hey when is a convenient time for me to come to your office to review the books,” and he replies “no, no office, parking lot,” and you say “okay I’ll drive to your office and you’ll come down—” and he says “oh no, not our parking lot, a different parking lot,” and you meet him in a parking lot 40 miles from his office, and he hands you printouts of the financial statements and drives away, how should you begin your audit? Which of the financial statements is most likely to contain red flags or discrepancies to be addressed? I feel like the answer is “the parking lot”? If I were auditing those financial statements, most of my questions would not be about technical accounting matters but “why are we meeting in a parking lot again?”

Here is a story about the CFO of the Detroit Riverfront Conservancy, William Smith, who was arrested last week for allegedly stealing $40 million from the nonprofit:

"Mr. Smith’s grip on the nonprofit’s finances was so tight that even the nonprofit’s accountant, charged with tracking spending, could not log into one of the group’s bank accounts. Only Mr. Smith had the password. He gave her the bank statements on paper and met her only four times a year, in the parking lot of a Honey Baked Ham store 40 miles from the office. […]

"Brian Mittendorf, a professor who studies nonprofit accounting at Ohio State University, said that the conservancy’s official documents show that it took steps to safeguard its finances — including oversight from its board of directors and annual audits.

"‘All these things sound as if it’s an organization with a pretty robust review in place. On the other hand, only one person can access the money, and provides paper copies in a Honey Baked Ham parking lot?’ Mr. Mittendorf said. ‘Those sound like the opposite of a robust governance mechanism.’"

As it happens, Smith allegedly altered the bank statements by “[removing] the payments to himself and [replacing] them with fake payments to other vendors.” I still don’t fully understand the parking lot, though? Like you can meet the accountant in your office to hand over the doctored paper financial statements; just unplug your computer first. I just feel like meeting in the parking lot sends a pretty strong message of “I AM DOING CRIME” that you might want to avoid, if you are doing crime.

[persepinas]

And why should I bother to tell of the times he came to me in wretched anxiety, begging me never to leave him, of the times we walked together and talked together, acted Shakespeare together for Claudia's amusement, or went arm in arm to hunt the riverfront taverns or to waltz with the dark-skinned beauties of the celebrated quadroon balls?

[waight-gain]

The Chef and the Critic

Chapter 3: Indulgent Dates and Growing Desire

The review had brought not only increased recognition and success to La Cuisine but also a deepening connection between Alex and Jacob. They found themselves eager to explore the possibilities that lay before them, both in and out of the kitchen.

Their first official date was at a cozy French bistro nestled in a quiet corner of the city. Alex, excited to see Jacob in a more relaxed setting, found himself nervous as he waited for the critic to arrive. When Jacob walked in, his face lighting up at the sight of Alex, all nervousness melted away.

"Alex," Jacob said, leaning in to press a soft kiss to his cheek. "I've been looking forward to this all week."

"Me too," Alex replied, a smile spreading across his face. "I thought it was time we experienced something new together, away from the kitchen."

The evening was filled with laughter, shared stories, and a mutual appreciation for the simple joy of good food and good company. They talked about their respective passions, their dreams, and their fears. Alex learned about Jacob's love for travel and his desire to one day explore the culinary delights of far-off lands. Jacob, in turn, discovered Alex's dedication to his craft, his love for creating not just delicious food, but unforgettable experiences.

As they savored their dessert, a decadent chocolate fondant, Jacob's expression grew serious. "Alex, there's something I've been wanting to talk to you about. It's... a part of me that I haven't shared with... well anyone. I'm not sure how you'll react, but I feel like I can trust you."

Alex reached across the table, his hand covering Jacob's. "You can trust me, Jacob. What is it?"

Jacob took a deep breath, his eyes searching Alex's. "I have a... fetish. It's about deriving pleasure from gaining weight, from being fed and pampered. It's a part of who I am, and I'd like to explore it with you, if you're open to it," Jacob said nearly whispering, feeling nervous for the first time in his adult life.

Alex was taken aback, his mind racing as he processed Jacob's words. He had come across gainers and feeders, a product of a childhood exploring the internet without limits, but had never given it much thought. Now, seeing the vulnerability in Jacob's eyes, he realized that this was an important part of who Jacob was, and he wanted to understand it, to support Jacob in exploring it.

"I'm... I'm open to learning about it, Jacob," Alex said, his voice steady and true. "I want to understand you, all of you. And if this is a part of that, then I'm in."

Relief washed over Jacob's face, and he leaned in to kiss Alex, his heart swelling with gratitude and love. From that moment on, their relationship took on a new dimension. They began to explore together, with Jacob sharing his desires and Alex learning to cater to them.

Their dates became more frequent, each one a celebration of their growing connection and their shared passion for food. Alex started creating special dishes for Jacob, rich in calories and flavor. He took pride in watching Jacob indulge, his pleasure evident in every bite. As Jacob's weight began to increase, so did his confidence and his happiness. Alex found himself captivated by the changes in Jacob's body, by the softness that replaced the sharp angles, and by the way Jacob's appetite for food and desire for Alex seemed to grow in tandem. Alex reveled in Jacob's reactions to his cooking, as he fed Jacob more and more, he found himself enjoying the process as much as Jacob did. Months passed, the constant rich food along with dating a chef clearly showing on his waist. He had lost all ab definition, his stomach had become soft and just started to spill over his waistband, all his clothes were tight, emphasizing every curve.

One evening, after a decadent meal at a renowned Italian restaurant, Jacob took Alex's hand as they walked along the riverfront. The city lights danced on the water, casting a warm glow on their faces. Jacob turned to Alex, his eyes sparkling with desire.

"Alex, I've been thinking. How about we take a week or two off and go somewhere, just the two of us? Someplace where we can relax, enjoy each other's company, and maybe even indulge in some incredible food."

Alex's heart raced with anticipation. "I'd love that, Jacob. What do you have in mind?"

"There's this beautiful hotel in Italy I've always wanted to visit," Jacob said, his voice filled with excitement. "They have an amazing restaurant, and they've been after me to come review it for months. Plus, they promised unlimited room service. I want you to be in charge, Alex. I want to give myself over to you, to trust you completely with this. Let's see if they can really deliver on that promise."

Alex's eyes widened with excitement. "You mean it? You want me to order for you, to feed you?"

Jacob nodded, a soft smile playing on his lips. "I do. I want to experience this through your eyes, through your tastes. I want to trust you, Alex, to give myself over to you completely."

Alex felt a surge of pride and desire. "I won't let you down, Jacob. I promise."

That weekend, they found themselves in a luxurious suite at the hotel Jacob had mentioned. As they settled in, Alex picked up the room service menu, his eyes scanning the options. He knew exactly what he wanted to feed Jacob first.

"Here we go," Alex said, his voice filled with anticipation as he placed the order. "Our first dish will be a rich, creamy risotto, filled with Arborio rice, Parmesan cheese, and a hint of saffron. I can't wait to see your face when you take that first bite."

Jacob's eyes widened with excitement. "I can't wait either."

As they waited for the risotto to arrive, Alex fed Jacob strawberries dipped in chocolate, their sweetness contrasting with the saltiness of his skin. He watched as Jacob savored each bite, his pleasure evident in every movement. When the risotto finally arrived, Alex took his time, feeding Jacob bite after bite, their connection deepening with each shared moment. They continued like this throughout their vacation, with Alex ordering dish after dish, each one more decadent and delicious than the last.

As the days wore on, Alex continued to indulge Jacob, feeding him dish after dish of decadent, calorie-rich food, keeping him stuffed to maximum capacity at all times. Jacob, surprised by Alex's dedication to him, surrendered himself to the pleasure of indulgence, trusting him completely. He could feel his body changing, growing rounder and softer with each passing meal.

By their last night, Jacob's belly had visibly grown since they arrived. It protruded out, a soft, rounded mound that hinted at the delicious treats it held. His once-sharp cheekbones had softened, his face taking on a rounder, a double chin just starting to form. His once-slender arms and legs now held a soft, inviting plumpness, and his movements had slowed, a testament to the contentment and satisfaction that filled him.

Alex watched these changes with awe and desire. He found himself captivated by Jacob's growing softness, by the way his body seemed to bloom under Alex's care. He loved the way Jacob's belly felt under his hands, the way it stretched and grew with each meal. It was as if Jacob was becoming a living, breathing embodiment of their love and indulgence.

One evening, as they sat on the balcony of their suite, watching the sun set over the Italian countryside, Alex fed Jacob the final dish of dinner—a rich, velvety tiramisu, layered with coffee-soaked ladyfingers, mascarpone cheese, and a dusting of cocoa powder. Jacob's eyes fluttered closed as he savored the dessert, a soft moan of pleasure escaping his lips.

"Alex," he whispered, his voice thick with satisfaction and desire. "I feel... I feel full. Not just my stomach, but my heart, my soul. I've never felt this way before. It's... it's incredible."

Alex's heart swelled with pride and love. He looked at Jacob, his eyes tracing the soft curves of his body, the way his belly strained against the fabric of his shirt. Jacob was no longer the lean, sharp-tongued critic he had first met; he was a vision of soft, sensual indulgence, a testament to their shared journey.

"I'm so glad, Jacob," Alex said, his voice filled with emotion. "I want to take care of you, to feed you, to watch you grow and flourish. I want to see how big and beautiful we can make you together."

Jacob's eyes fluttered open, meeting Alex's gaze. He reached out, his hand covering Alex's, their fingers entwining. "I want that too, Alex. I want to explore this with you, to see how far we can go. I trust you, completely." He took Alex by the hand and led him back to the bed.

Jacob stood, his movements slow and deliberate, and began to undress. As he revealed his body, Alex found himself captivated by the changes he saw. Jacob's once-slim chest was now a soft, rounded expanse, his belly a full, inviting mound. His once-slender legs were now thick and muscular under the layer of fat, a testament to the delicious food he had indulged in.

As Jacob approached the bed, Alex reached out, his hands tracing the soft curves of Jacob's body. He could feel the heat of Jacob's skin, the way it seemed to radiate with a sensual energy. He marveled at the way Jacob's body had changed, at the softness and fullness that now defined him.

Jacob climbed onto the bed, his movements deliberate and careful, mindful of the weight he now carried. As he straddled Alex, his body pressed against Alex's, his weight a warm, comforting presence. Alex could feel every curve, every soft inch of Jacob's body, and it sent a surge of desire coursing through him.

They made love slowly, their bodies moving in a dance as old as time itself. Alex reveled in the feeling of Jacob's weight on top of him, in the way it enveloped him, surrounded him. It was as if Jacob was a living, breathing blanket, his softness a comforting, sensual embrace.

As they moved together, Alex could feel the way Jacob's belly pressed against his, the way it wobbled with their movements. It was as if Jacob's body was a separate entity, a living, breathing extension of their love and desire.

Jacob's moans filled the room, a symphony of pleasure that matched the rhythm of their bodies. Alex could feel Jacob's heart pounding against his own, could feel the way their breaths synchronized, becoming one. It was as if they were two halves of a whole, their bodies and souls intertwined in a dance as ancient as the universe itself.

As they climaxed together, their bodies shaking with the force of their release, Alex found himself captivated by the feeling of Jacob's weight on top of him, and longing for more.

Bonus:

[on-a-lucky-tide]

Price prepares for his first date with Nik. 141 rib him.

CW: none.

Price stared into the mirror above his sink and wondered when the fuck all those lines on his face had arrived. Last time he’d looked, he could have sworn there were fewer, and there had been no grey either, but now he saw traces of his old man in the reflection and that made his stomach twist unpleasantly.

In all fairness, he didn’t really have much reason to look–really look–at his own face. Even when he was smearing camo around his eyes and down his cheeks, he was only looking for areas of shine that might draw an enemy’s eye. He never really considered why else someone might be lookin’.

Why Nik might be lookin’.

“Bloody hell,” he breathed as he began gathering up his shaving bowl and the badger-fur brush he only got out on special occasions; medal ceremonies, weddings, funerals and now, apparently, bloody dates. Why the fuck he had even agreed to it in the first place he had no idea, but Nik was surprisingly romantic given what Price knew about the rest of his life, and it was difficult to say no when he turned on those eyes. The word ‘no’ felt like booting a Labrador in the face.

Price stashed his shaving kit away and turned back to the mirror to check the rest. He had been pretty sure the shirt he had scrounged from the bottom of his paltry wardrobe hadn’t seen the light of day since the early noughties, and that had been confirmed when he’d pulled it around his shoulders and the buttons had gaped over his chest. Twenty years ago he’d been a lot leaner, but two decades of focused gym sessions, hard graft and being battered in the field had left him with a lot more heft. He’d pulled on a white t-shirt underneath and left it open, hoping he didn't look too much like someone's dad trying to look ten years younger.

Hair waxed into place, beard conditioned, aftershave and cologne–but not enough to register as chemical warfare–and he was as good as he was gonna get. He had never been asked on a date, only ever done the asking, and even then the sum total of his dating efforts as a young man had ended in disaster. Cold fish and chips on the riverfront and getting your leg over in the nearby park, only to fumble that too, wasn’t exactly peak romance, even at fifteen years old, and somehow he didn't think Nik had anything similar in mind.

Fifteen years old. That had been--

Oh, fuck. He was not equipped for this in the slightest.

Price’s phone beeped and a glance at the message confirmed Nik had arrived on base to pick him up. Bang on time too. Price took one final look in the mirror, grimaced, shook his head and pinched the bridge of his nose. Fuck it. It would have to do. Nik had seen him looking like the arse end of a donkey, so this… jitter in Price’s chest felt bloody stupid.

“Get a fuckin’ grip,” he murmured to himself as he snatched his wallet and keys from his bed and shut the door behind him. Unfortunately for Price, the rest of 141 were eagerly awaiting his appearance in the rec room and all looked up when he closed the door. He immediately regretted not exiting through the open window in his room.

“Well, well, cap, don’ ye brush up nice. G’ies a twirl,” Soap said, leaning forward with a wide grin that informed Price he was about to endure a good five to ten minutes of focused ribbing.

“Watch it, MacTavish,” Price replied, but without heat. He felt like a prize twat and this was Soap’s roundabout way of helping.

“Och, c’mon noow,” Soap spread his hands and turned to Garrick for support, “Gaz, back me up…”

Garrick looked up from his phone and tilted his head to the side, clearly evaluating just how much he wanted to chance Price putting him on the worst details for the next week. Apparently, he was feeling pretty fucking lucky that evening. “Pretty sure my dad owns that shirt, Tav. Very… uh, early noughties chic. What d’ya think, Ghost?”

Price could count on Simon to fight his corner against these two reprobates. Or so he thought. Simon leaned back, arms folded across his chest, and examined Price for a beat before choosing violence. “Pretty sure I saw it last about ten years ago,” Simon said, and then shook his head. “Happy to drop a pony on a new striker xt gen 2 so you can have the ranger green as well as the steel grey, but couldn’t cough up a few quid on a new shirt, sir.”

“You’re all bastards, and I you’ll be shovelling the shit next week once I get back to my desk,” Price growled.

A round of groans followed, and Soap rolled up to his feet. “C’mon, sir, we’re just jossin’. As my ol’ nan used tae say: a pritty face suits the dish-cloot.”

“Dish cloth chic,” Gaz said, grinning.

“Ah mean he looks bonnie, right? ‘Side, we need to cut the ol’ man some slack. When was th’ last time ye got tae let yer hair doon, sir?”

“Not long enough,” Price said, pinching the bridge of his nose and planning to beast the trooper delaying Nik at the checkpoint.

“I reckon the last time was when Usher was in the charts. What was the song? Ooh-whoop ooh-whoop, ooh-whoop ooh-whoop, shit, what was it called?”

Price decided that Garrick would be organising a mock dawn raid for the freshest batch of recruits. He would make sure the weather forecast was grim.

“Wait, wait, lemme get it up on Spotify. We c'n get cap in the mood tae drop tha’ thang. Reckon Nik’s an animal on the dancefloor, aye? Ha! Found it. ‘Yeah’ by Usher.”

Soap would be joining Garrick. Full weighted kit.

Price watched as the two sergeants bounced around enthusiastically to a song from 2004 that was, by Price’s estimations, only a year older than the shirt he was currently wearing. Fucking disaster. He looked at Simon, who was watching Johnny with that far away look he always did when he thought no one else would notice.

“You have started the party without me, I see,” said a familiar voice at the door. Price looked over and nearly choked on his own tongue. Nik looked fucking good. White button down open at the collar, black slacks, polished shoes, with his hair freshly cut. Simple, but classy. Price tugged at his sleeve and rubbed the back of his neck, hoping the heat he felt under his skin hadn't translated into a flush.

Nik appraised Price with those same soft eyes that had implored him from the cockpit of his damn helicopter for a date. Price cleared his throat. “You scrub up good, Nik.”

“I could say the same. But you are always the prettiest thing in any room to me, captain.”

Price’s face burned to the very tips of his ears.

“Ah, Nik! Watcha mate, how're you doin’?” Garrick bounded over and threw his arm around Nik’s shoulders for a half hug.

“Ye better have him home by ten!” Soap called from where he stayed slouched on the sofa.

“Of course, sergeant.”

“Nik, let's go, and you lot, get an early night. Pay back's a bitch.”

Nik smiled and stepped aside with what was definitely a bloody half bow to let Price out of the rec room first to a chorus of groans and entreaties for mercy from the two sergeants. Price and Nik emerged into the night air and had almost reached the car before Nik took Price's hand and drew him to a stop. “You are nervous.”

Price cleared his throat, sniffed, and did his best to come off as nonchalant. “Nah, I'm grand, just realised I’ve not got the clobber for this kind of thing, or the, uh… expertise. I'm worried you'll be disappointed.”

Nik looked at him blankly.

“Ah, sorry, my… clothes. It's been a long time since–”

Nik took his chin and lifted his eyes from where they had drifted to the ground. The kiss he placed on Price’s lips was tender, fleeting compared to their first shared under the downdraft of spinning helicopter blades, but it made Price's heart stutter just the same.

“You look good…” Nik released his chin to push both hands into Price’s hair, mussing it out of its careful arrangement. Next, he reached around the back of Price’s belt and tugged his t-shirt free. “Hm, now better.” Price swallowed hard, trying not to be too obvious about inhaling Nik’s scent as he pressed in close.

“Scruffy more like.” Price was still getting over the feeling of Nik’s fingers in his hair, brushing the skin on his back. Nerves had been replaced by the soft thrum of something warm in his chest.

“Nyet. English country boy with rough edges and blue eyes. You are honest, John Price. And a good man. It is what I have always loved most.” Nik opened the car door as Price gawped at him with wide eyes. When his senses had returned, Price realised Nik had rented a nondescript BMW for his stay, with leather interior and a fully digital media system. Plush. “After you.”

“Where’re we goin’?” Price asked as he slid into the passenger seat.

“Is surprise.”

“Bloody hell, and here I was thinkin' we’d go out for a movie and a pint.”

Nik grinned, tapping the beemer into ‘Drive’. “I will have the captain back before he turns into pumpkin, or the lieutenant mounts a rescue mission.”

Price chuckled as Nik pulled away into the night. Thankfully, Usher didn't feature in the evening‘s itinerary.

[spiicii]

bloodline property / valentine’s day (sami)

sami zayn x fem!reader word count → 2.5k summary → sami takes you out for valentine’s day, but it’s clear he’s nervous. you decide to let him ask some questions about the bloodline that have been weighing heavily on his mind. unfortunately, some of his questions end up making you feel more confused.  links → masterlist / taglist tags → fluff, romance, talking about feelings, exploring character dynamics, insecure!sami, no graphic descriptions of sex in this one (sorry gang)

Wednesday ✩ Sami

Sami seemed nervous. 

You were walking together along the river, the view beautiful as the sun began to set behind the tall skyscrapers of the city. The area was normally bustling with tourists, but it wasn’t busy tonight, the February air chilly enough to deter most from an evening walk. Still, you didn’t mind the cold, especially if it meant that the normally busy riverfront was quiet, allowing you and Sami to be alone. Unfortunately, the quiet seemed to only compound Sami’s nervousness, a man who was much more comfortable surrounded by others than left by himself. 

Even now he was skittering around you like a frightened animal, making sure to avoid your eyes any time you looked at him. Which was a shame because he had such pretty blue eyes. Eyes you wouldn’t mind staring at. 

He’d dressed up tonight, wearing a nice dress shirt and slacks, his usually wild mane of red hair tied up in a neat bun. He was wearing a new cologne, something with a hint of spice that made your head spin whenever you got close to him. If he would even let you get close to him. You’d already tried to hold his hand and he’d pulled away from you as if you had burned him. 

“Let’s find a bench.” You suggested, breaking the tense air between you. “Don’t want to walk too far in heels.” 

“Oh!” Sami’s eyes flashed down to your stilettos in alarm. “I forgot! Yes, of course. Let’s sit down. Over here okay?” 

You nodded as Sami led you to a bench near the water’s edge, his hand hovering in the air as if he were considering placing it on your back to guide you, before he quickly thought better of it and moved away from you again.  

You tried to offer him a reassuring smile as you both sat, but Sami wasn’t looking at you, seemingly determined to avoid your gaze. He sat as far away from you on the bench as he could, wringing his hands nervously in his lap as he stared mutely at the river. 

You decided to give it some time. 

Things had been a little awkward with other members of the Bloodline as well in the beginning. You smiled as you remembered Jey’s first night with you alone. He’d been so hesitant, his eyes continuing to dart to the closed bedroom door as if he expected Roman to barge in any second and change his mind about sharing you. Maybe that’s what Sami was nervous about. 

You chanced a look over at Sami again and saw that he was chewing on his bottom lip, seemingly lost in thought as he watched the cold water swirl and foam near the water’s edge. You decided to try again. 

“This was Roman’s idea, you know.” 

You’d kept your voice calm, but Sami jumped as if you’d shouted at him. 

“What?” 

You met his alarmed gaze with a reassuring smile. “This.” You motioned to the two of you. “Was his idea. That’s what you’re worried about, right? Roman?” 

Sami fidgeted under your patient gaze. “Roman? I mean, I guess. I don’t really know.” 

You could tell he wanted to say more but was forcing himself to hold back, his eyes returning to stare across the river. 

You hadn’t known Sami as long as the others, but you knew he liked to talk. Perhaps that’s what he needed: to get some things off his chest, maybe ask some questions. After all, the two of you had never really been alone before. 

“Hey,” You said softly, moving a little bit closer to him just so you could try to catch his eye again. He watched you warily, still chewing his bottom lip in nervousness. “Will you tell me what’s bothering you? I want you to have a good time, but right now you seem pretty nervous.” 

Sami let out a weak laugh. “Yeah, I know.” He seemed apologetic when he finally looked at you. “I’m sorry, I guess I just don’t know what I’m doing.” 

You smiled at him. “It’s okay. We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.” 

Sami nodded, looking away again to take a few deep breaths. “Look, maybe…maybe I’m just a little confused.” 

“About what?” You asked patiently, trying to catch his eyes again. He was still determined to avoid your gaze, seemingly unable to get the words out if he was looking at you. 

“When I first joined the Bloodline, I didn’t know anything about you. I mean, Jey had mentioned he was seeing someone. Jimmy too. And I knew Roman had a girl. I just didn’t know they were all talking about the same person.” 

His eyes flickered over to you, as if to gauge your reaction to his words. When he saw your encouraging smile, he seemed to feel more confident about continuing. 

“And when I met you, I guess I just didn’t understand how it all worked. And maybe I was a little too nervous to ask. The guys are a little…” He seemed to flounder looking for the right word. “Possessive, I guess? It’s clear they care about you a lot. I didn’t want to ask something dumb and maybe make someone mad.” 

He let out an embarrassed laugh. “But I guess that’s stupid, huh?” 

“No, no.” You were quick to reassure him. “It’s not stupid. You didn’t want to step on anyone’s toes. I get it.” 

Sami seemed relieved that you understood. “Right! And when Roman started inviting me over, I guess I just thought it was a test. Some kind of initiation, maybe. But now it doesn’t feel that way anymore. It seems like he actually wants me to spend time with you.” 

“He does.” You told him, moving a bit closer to him on the bench. 

He cast you another wary look but he didn’t move away. Instead, he said, “But I don’t get why. I thought you two were together. Why would he want us to go out? Why would he be okay with that?” 

You considered. “I think he just wants you to be happy, Sami. You’re part of the family now. And you know he would do anything for his family.” 

Sami still seemed confused. “That’s it? It’s just that simple?” 

He seemed distressed, his brow furrowed as he stared out across the river. You didn’t like seeing him this way so you reached out his hand and took it, trying to get your own words out before he pulled away again. 

“Look, I can’t pretend to know exactly why Roman does what he does. But what I do know is that he cares about you. A lot. And he knows that I want to spend time with you too.” 

Sami’s gaze snapped over to you in surprise and you tried to resist the urge to look away, even though you felt a little shy now. “I like you, Sami. I…like you a lot. I want to spend time with you. And Roman knows that.” 

Sami seemed shocked by this revelation. “You do?” 

You gave a breathless laugh. “Is that really such a crazy idea? To think I might like you? You’re sweet. You’re funny. You’re handsome.” Now your cheeks were heating up, but you forced yourself to continue. “I was excited to go out with you tonight. I want to get to know you. I want us to spend time together.” 

You watched as Sami stared at your hand holding his. He seemed to be in disbelief, his eyebrows raised high onto his forehead. 

“But…what about Jey?” 

You blinked at him in surprise. “What?” 

“You know…” Sami seemed nervous again. “You and Jey.” 

You frowned, trying to process his words, and Sami let out an exasperated sigh. “Come on, you know what I’m talking about.” 

“Apparently I don’t.” You pursed your lips when you met his gaze again. He seemed to be studying you now, as if to gauge just how serious you were being. 

“I mean, I thought it was pretty obvious.” 

“What is?” 

“That he cares about you.” 

You let out a huff of laughter. “Well, yeah. I’d like to think they all do. And I care about them too.” 

“No. Not like that.” Sami shook his head. “It’s…different with you two.” 

“What do you mean?” 

Now it was Sami’s turn to be confused, his eyes watching you curiously as you stared at him. “You’re telling me that you and Jey don’t have something special going on?” 

Special? 

“I…” 

You felt blindsided, your mind racing at Sami’s words. You cared about everyone in the family equally. You didn’t play favorites. You obeyed Roman because you belonged to him, but that was different. You and Jey didn’t have anything special. It wasn’t any different with him than it was with Jimmy or Solo. Right? 

“Look, I’m sorry I didn’t mean to upset you,” Sami was saying, his eyes kind as he looked at you. “I just thought it was really obvious.” 

You shook your head. “No, no, I’m not upset. I just…” 

You thought back over the last few months. Sure, Jey had been a bit more possessive than usual, maybe monopolized you a bit more than his brothers did, but that was just him. Besides, if you had anything special with anyone it was Roman. Not Jey. 

“Jey and I don’t have anything going on.” You decided, shaking your head to clear your muddled thoughts. “No more than I do with the others. It’s special with all of them. Not just him.” 

Sami didn’t seem convinced. “Look, I know you and Roman have your…dynamic. But come on, I’ve seen the way Jey looks at you. How he acts differently when he’s with you. Hell, even how he talks about you when you’re not around. And believe me, he talks about you a lot. It’s pretty obvious to me that he’s in love with-”

“Sami.” You hated interrupting him but you felt like this conversation was going off the rails. You were beginning to feel confused and anxious, your heart pounding in your chest as your thoughts began to race. “Look, I hear you. I do. But Jey’s just…he’s just…” 

You felt the bizarre urge to cry and you quickly shook your head again, forcing yourself to focus. You couldn’t do this right now. Sami was wrong. Jey didn’t have feelings for you. You didn’t have feelings for him. You were fond of each other, of course, but things weren’t special. They couldn’t be. 

You flashed Sami a winning smile, forcing down the torrent of emotion that had suddenly welled up in your chest. “Things with Jey aren’t any different, Sami.” You insisted, squeezing his hand in reassurance. “But look, if you have any other questions, I’m happy to answer them. I want you to feel comfortable. Really I do.” 

Sami still seemed uncertain, clearly holding back more that he wanted to say. He continued to gaze at you and you could only hope that you didn’t look as emotionally fragile as you felt. You were relieved when he finally said, “No, it’s okay. I guess I’m still just trying to figure everything out. The Bloodline…it’s a lot sometimes, you know?” 

You did. Perhaps more than Sami knew. 

“I understand.” You told him, offering him another encouraging smile. “But what about us? Can we talk about that?” 

Sami nodded, squeezing your hand and moving closer to you on the bench. “Yeah, of course. I…” He trailed off, choosing his next words carefully. “I wasn’t expecting to hear you say some of the things you said earlier.” 

You gave him a wry smile. “What? That I liked you?” 

For the first time tonight you could see the faintest blush on Sami’s cheeks. “Yeah. I guess I just thought, you know, compared to the rest of the Bloodline, you wouldn’t even be interested in me.” 

You furrowed your brow. “What? Why not?” 

Sami shook his head, suddenly unable to look you in the eye again. “I know I don’t exactly look like they do. They’re big and strong and Samoan and…and I know that my track record in the ring hasn’t been too great recently. I mean, my skill is nowhere near the Tribal Chief’s. And I then there’s the-”

“Now, wait just a minute,” You couldn’t help but interrupt him again, unhappy with the direction the conversation was headed. “So what if you don’t look like them? I don’t have just one type, you know.” 

Sami’s eyes flickered over to yours before he let out an embarrassed laugh. “Yeah, but come on, let’s be honest. You’re way out of my league.” 

You frowned. “Sweetheart, that’s not true. At all. Why would you even think that?” 

Sami’s cheeks flushed a deeper color, though you couldn’t be sure if it was because of the pet name or your question. “I don’t know,” he muttered, still shifting anxiously in his seat. You were happy that he wasn’t letting go of your hand. “I guess I just haven't had much luck in the romance department recently.” 

You made a sympathetic noise, now moving close enough to him that your legs were touching. “Sami, do you think I would lie to you?” 

Sami seemed alarmed by your question. “What? No, of course not!” 

You smiled. “Then trust me when I say I want to be with you, Sami. I like everything about you. You’re sweet. Always considerate and kind. Always making sure I feel good.” 

You leaned closer to him, your eyes meeting again. This time it felt electric. You couldn’t resist the urge to reach out to cup his cheek, watching as he seemed to hold his breath at your touch. 

“You’re so handsome.” You continued, your thumb caressing his cheekbone. “I like everything about you. Your hair. Your eyes. Your lips.” 

Your eyes flickered down to his lips instinctively and he visibly gulped, his eyes wide as he stared at you. 

“I want you, Sami,” Your voice was low now, your bodies moving closer and closer together. “But what do you want?” 

Sami seemed unable to look away from you now, seemingly mesmerized by what he saw. 

“I think…” Sami trailed off, his eyes flickering down to your lips as well. “I think I really want to kiss you.” 

You smiled when he did, his touch tentative, as if he were expecting you to pull away. You moved closer instead, pressing your body against his and intertwining your fingers together. 

When he took you back to the penthouse later that night, he seemed a lot more relaxed, seemingly consoled by the conversation you shared by the river. He was sweet as he fucked you, his words praising and his gaze at you adoring. And when you finally collapsed back onto the bed together, both of you breathless and euphoric from the pleasure you’d given each other, Sami turned to you, hair tousled and eyes sparkling, and said, “Happy Valentine’s Day, pretty girl.” 

You couldn’t help but smile, pulling him close so you could kiss his nose. “Happy Valentine’s Day, Sami.” 

_____

next part: valentine's day (jey)

previous part: valentine's day (jimmy)

besties: @acute-crashout-jeyuso @mindairy @amandairene88 @askullasunflower @partypoison00 @brianochka @femdisa @luvrsluxe @zephyrazzz @scorpiochaos @gardencottage @minteagalaxea @annyanse @nbanenefrmdao @wishyouloveme @glittergirl7 @bloodline-fanacc @key05marie @mzv11 @neytiri-20 @solarrexplosion @ayeeeitsmiracle @buttercup0024

[honeysorwell]

all of it (all of you) 

Pairing: Melissa Schemmenti x hairdresser!fem Reader

Synopsis of the story + Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5, Chapter 6, Chapter 7, Chapter 8, Chapter 9, Chapter 10

Link on AO3

Chapter 2 — hot

Tag list: @janeyseymour @italianaidiota @chloeelou02x (and if you want to be tagged too just let me know.)

Warning: there is a line for people who want to kiss Mel's burn hand, and I'm the first in it.

Words: 5,7k

The comments and compliments I received for this work caught me completely unprepared. Guys, thank you all very much for embracing my work with such affection.

Enjoy!

Fifteen people in the last twenty days.

Fifteen people have complimented Melissa's hair in the last twenty days.

In theory, everything was done the same as usual, but by someone else's hands. However, the universe decided to make the redhead feel even more guilty about everything that happened on her last visit to the salon.

First, it was Barb. The older woman touched Melissa's red hair tenderly in the teacher's breakroom, without any apprehension or concern about the second and tirtd-grade teacher's reaction, and complimented the way it was colored, saying it looked brighter than before.

But it quickly escalated into something more significant.

Ava asked if she did anything differently, and the principal did so while telling a flattering joke asking where her Roger Rabbit was, which even made Barbara laugh softly. Next, it was Janine and Jacob who also complimented her hair, with a shy Gregory by their side who just nodded.

Then more and more parents of students joined the complementary wave of affection towards her. And then Melissa was hearing compliments from Abbott’s new stocker and vending machine operator, a handsome man with hair that was too long for her taste named Julian who now shares the heavy workload of the truck with Gary (causing the bald man with the mustache to blush before he softly agrees with his new co-worker).

Then there are a few random teenagers, grocery store clerks, who stop her to tell her she looks hot, quickly finishing the sentence with a “respectfully” before Melissa even has time to respond to them.

Normally Melissa would love all of this attention, and in another scenario, the compliments would have encouraged her to go out after work on some random Friday night looking for someone brave enough to try something more than a compliment. But this time the Italian woman felt her heart clench and her mind race a thousand miles an hour as she thought about the hairdresser who did that job every time someone complimented her.

So she actively swallows her pride and visits the Riverfront Roots Salon once again. Melissa would truly rather die than apologize or admit she was wrong. She memorized this from her family and she carries this learning throughout her life, but even someone like the redhead needs to admit that nothing can be applied in life without at least one exception.

That's why Melissa makes this visit to the salon on a Tuesday, after the school day is over since the darkness of the night could allow a little more privacy between her and Y/N.

As she parks her car in front of Riverfront Roots, the redhead convinces herself that it doesn't hurt to make sure that only the minimum number of people witness this display of vulnerability coming from a Schimmenti as she watches what seems to be the last customers of the night saying goodbye to the receptionist before leaving.

What will she say?

She has no idea.

But everything goes down the drain when the redhead's idea goes wrong. So when she returns home at night, unable to even talk to the hairdresser to replace the image of discomfort written on Y/N's face from her memory with an apology, Melissa decides to call her confidant and arrange to meet her the following weekend, using the next few days to gather courage and ask for advice from the one who never failed to give her the best of them whenever the teacher needed it.

“Oh, Melissa. How are you, ragazza (girl)? Don't get me wrong, cuz I figured I'd get your call, just not exactly as an invitation for coffee...”, Andrea's voice rings out as Melissa enters her favorite coffee shop, sounding happier than the last time the teacher saw her, and the redhead imagines that this is the result of the free time resting that the Italian woman must now have in abundance thanks to her retirement.

“What? Can't I invite my friend for coffee and ask her how her days are going without the sound of the hairdryer making her deaf?”, her voice sounds playful above all, which makes the answer she receives from Andrea come along with a laugh.

“Of course you can, dear!”

And so they talk for several hours, drinking coffee after coffee and hardly caring about how electric their bodies will be after ingesting so much caffeine while sharing pieces of their current lives. At first, it is strange to look at the woman in front of them and not see their own face next to that one, sharing a reflection in the mirror, but it is nice and the two women quickly get used to the new arrangement.

“Of course, you knew I would miss you,” Melissa says with a laugh, chewing gently on one of the best butter cookies she has ever eaten after taking another sip of her particularly hot coffee.

“Oh, I knew that. But, that’s not exactly what turned on the light bulb in my head,” the older woman says with an air of wisdom that only someone who has ever lived in the world enough to know too much can have, and after taking another sip of her coffee, she continued, “You see... Y/N called me a few weeks ago asking for permission to pass on the mix recipe I developed for you to another hairdresser... So, even though she didn't give me any details, I figured something had... happened.”

Melissa felt that the blood under the skin of her face was truly burning with shame.

The redhead thought about swallowing the coffee in her cup in one go, hoping it would burn her tongue with how hot the liquid was, and thus be able to escape from answering what Andrea clearly wanted to know.

She knew she was cornered and had been caught, with no intelligent way to escape. Shame and guilt mixed together, creating a bitter taste in the teacher's mouth even with the memory of the cookie so fresh on her tongue.

But, Melissa's usual response to these situations, loud and ready for a fight, doesn't happen here. Not with Andrea. Never with Andrea.

“What a big mouth... Jezz...”, is how the teacher responds, mumbling as she looks away from her friend in front of her.

“Something tells me yours is too.”

“I just... I was angry, okay?”, for the first time the redhead is honest even in the midst of murmurs, “And she’s different, and she kept talking... so I... I freaked out and said what I shouldn’t have.”

Andrea remains silent, just observing the discomfort of the one in front of her with affection and understanding, and it’s this look that makes Melissa continue to speak.

“I know I crossed the line... But she did too!”, the words come out of the teacher’s mouth accusingly before she shares the whole story with Andrea, who smiles and shows surprise at every bit of her student’s encounter with Melissa shared with her, especially with the scissors.

“And what do you want to do now? I even know other hairdressers, but—”

“No! I just... I don't know exactly how I should apologize... Don't get me wrong, I don't want to apologize, but I really know I need to.”, honesty and vulnerability continue their journey between Melissa's mind and tongue as she speaks, “I stopped by her salon but they didn't even let me see her, they just gave me a paper with how many grams of each dye I need for my whole head and sent me away. But since you told me she was your pupil... Well...I thought that maybe...”

“Oh... I see.”, Andrea's voice has the most suggestive tone Melissa has heard in years, and thanks to the look the older woman gives her, full of knowledge, the redhead's cheeks blush.

“Please Andrea, it's not like that.”, the sentence escapes her lips just as her neck also begins to blush, with a speed that would be justified if Melissa were being tortured, trying to prove her innocence of a crime that the teacher definitely did not commit. But maybe she thought about it. "I really hurt the kid's feelings."

Or if she had enjoyed many generous sips of her coffee, even though she knew how hot it was.

“I didn’t say anything, Mel. So I have no idea what you’re talking about,” Andrea can sense Melissa’s embarrassment, so she diverts her attention to the bigger picture, even though her knowing smile never leaves her lips, “But look… You know you’re a good cook, and you’ve gotten your fair share of favors that way. Maybe it’s worth trying your luck with Y/N.”

After that, the subject goes back to what it was before, and the teacher actually tries to focus on Andrea saying that she’ll be spending next summer in Europe, but Melissa’s mind starts working in a completely different way. She silently goes over (in her memory) the most beloved dishes from the cookbook she inherited from her grandmother while listening to Andrea talk about how it would be a pleasure to have Melissa over if she decides to run away from her family for the upcoming holidays. And when they pay the bill for the coffee, Melissa knows what to do.

“And Melissa… Cut off an inch when you get the chance, ragazza (girl). It's getting a little.. uneven.”, this is the end of Andrea's farewell to the redhead after a tight hug and a sweet kiss on the forehead, but the words are said in a maternal tone, of genuine care for the teacher that makes Melissa, even without thinking, respond to the older woman with just an affirmative nod and a loving smile.

And, as she doesn't want to think about what happened when someone else suggested the same thing, at least not now, Melissa goes home with only that feeling in her chest.

When the moon took over the sky that night, Melissa was lying under the covers of her bed, staring at the ceiling of her room and completely giving up on falling asleep, while her mind went over and over her conversation with Andrea. The older woman was right, as always.

She could cook something for Y/N.

Cooking has always been her passion since she was little, and that was one of the things that made the redhead and her grandmother even closer. The fact that Melissa was very good at it only helped her cause of being her grandmother's favorite.

Most of the time the redhead cooks as a thank you, rather than an apology, but the change is small. And so, the fact that the idea of ​​cooking to apologize wasnt Melissa's honestly shocked her.

Most of her guys are just people from all over Philadelphia who work in different places and when they hear about how good her food is, they actively choose to seek her out, willingly offering services (sometimes illicit ones) that the redhead might be interested in in the long run in order to have the opportunity to taste her seasoning, thus forming an alliance.

It's impossible not to take advantage of this after a few years.

Finding out and memorizing what her most skillful guys' favorite dishes are. Doubling or even tripling the size of recipes that were previously made for only ten people, making her thanks become something shared with more and more potential “guys” (thus increasing the number of guys offering their services to her) so often that the redhead has forgotten how to cook for just two people in the last twenty years.

Cooking is a gift that, unlike her job as a teacher, the redhead didn't have to choose. It was flowing through her veins.

Melissa knows that this is one of the simplest ways to get what she wants. And maybe that's what made her block this possibility until now.

There was a voice inside her head, not the part inflated by her ego for always getting what she wants thanks to how good her food is and how everyone who knows about her talent wants to appreciate it, but the insecure and confused one that whispers in a soft voice that Melissa wants to manipulate Y/N.

And for the first time in a while, she’s not bragging about doing it. In fact, she doesn’t want to do it at all.

For some reason that Melissa still doesn’t know but keeps scratching her insides, she wants to earn Y/N’s apology, not demand it with her food.

And it doesn’t help that it’s been a long time since Melissa apologized to anyone.

Knowing that she won’t be able to sleep anytime soon and taking advantage of the fact that tomorrow will be Sunday, the second and third-grade teacher gets out of bed and goes to the kitchen, wondering what she should cook.

It’s already the middle of the night, and she has a lot of grading to do for her students’ tests tomorrow, but Melissa knows she won’t be able to concentrate if she doesn’t do that first.

Wrapped in a dark blue robe and hoping that Jacob won’t come to check why she is up so late at night, the teacher carefully opens the refrigerator and checks the ingredients she has and the ones she bought the last time she went to the farmer’s market.

Orange juice... Half a bottle of wine... Milk... Eggs... Fresh mascarpone?

When her eyes focus on the sweet cream-colored cheese, a train of thoughts runs through her head. Melissa knows less than little about her new hairdresser — which is her fault, and she knows this — but who doesn't like a sweet treat after a long day of work?

The redhead has dark chocolate in the pantry. Coffee is always a must in a teacher's house. And her cousin gave her a cocoa powder so rich and velvety last Christmas that it could melt in her fingers.

So tiramisu it is.

It was a simple yet sophisticated dessert, full of layers of flavors and textures that the redhead hoped would be enough to convey the care and effort she had put into the dessert. And that would certainly be worth more than a few words, right?

When Melissa goes back to bed, she knows that this is a good idea, and, bathed in this certainty, the redhead can finally see herself falling asleep as she climbs back to bed.

"Perfect," is the word Melissa whispers softly to herself, as she finally gets the thing that was preventing her from sleeping off her chest.

The next morning, the redhead took a quick shower and went downstairs, deciding to organize everything she would need to grade her little eagles' work on the dining room table before taking a deep breath and heading to the kitchen.

She hadn't made homemade Savoiardi in years, always using the ones from the Italian bakery that sold her favorite cannolis. But today was different. Today, cooking would make her put her feelings in order, perhaps even directing her mind to a light that would clear her ideas for what the teacher should say when giving the dessert to Y/N the next morning.

The redhead begins to separate the ingredients she will need to bake the cookies quickly, already deciding that it would be smart to have the necessary ingredients on the kitchen counter even before she finishes making her coffee. Anticipating the company she will have when she hears the sound of lazy footsteps coming from the stairs, Melissa fills one more cup than she would if she were alone with the dark liquid and begins to grab her frying pan to put it in the stove and prepare what she's going to eat.

"Good morning Mel-Mel!", Jacob sounds as he enters the kitchen, hoarse and sleepy, leaning softly against the kitchen counter and observing the ingredients that are displayed there.

"Morning Jacob. There's coffee ready.", Melissa answers softly, pointing to the coffee cup next to hers, still full and steaming, waiting for the younger teacher.

"Thank you.", the smile Jacob gives her is initially full of gratitude, but quickly turns to curiosity when he continues, "Oh... what are you cooking?"

The teacher isn't sure what exactly this question refers to, but considering how curiously he was looking at her ingredients just a minute ago, Melissa gives Jacob two simple answers.

"Eggs, and then baking."

"That's cool. Let me finish this, you already made me coffee.", Jacob says as he gently takes the spoon from the redhead's hand, then grabs four eggs from the fridge and takes her place in front of the stove.

After he moved in with Melissa and this new and sweet idea of ​​friendship was born between the two teachers, what had previously been just a few cooking lessons here and there turned into an intensive course. But the younger teacher loved every second of it. Jacob learned so much about everyday food living with the redhead and even managed to succeed at it, making moments like that more and more natural in the Italian woman's kitchen.

Taking advantage of the softness of her replacement in front of the stove, the redhead begins to gently check if everything she needs to bake is there until Jacob's voice sounds again.

"Did you know that astronauts can bake bread in some space stations?", the man says the words with childish excitement, but still with his eyes attentive to the eggs he is stirring gently on the stove, exactly as the redhead instructed him weeks ago, "Wouldn't it be nice to eat warm bread while you watch the Earth from afar?"

"First, I'm not baking bread. But yes, it does sound good to them, kid.” Melissa’s response is simple and sweet, not irritated like she usually would be when she hears silly things like that at work.

They ate breakfast in comfortable silence. Melissa knew Jacob was going on a date that Sunday, so from the moment she woke up to the moment she heard Jacob singing in the upstairs shower before he began to get properly dressed for the lunch he would share with Avi, the paramedic at the local Philadelphia fire station, everything was going according to the plan the teacher had until she started baking.

Melissa tried to focus on the methodical rhythm of her task. Crack the egg, pour the white into a jar, pour the yolks into the mixer bowl, and repeat. But her mind insisted on going back to what she had done a few weeks ago. The words she had said to Y/N were sharp and thoughtless, but what weighed on her like a stone in her stomach was the change in the hairdresser’s expression. "She may have already forgotten...", Melissa muttered to herself, trying to calm her mind. But she knew it wasn't true.

She knew Janine didn't mean to say that she was a bad teacher when Courtney was transferred to her class, not really. It was just the younger teacher's ego and naivety, both screaming and destroying Janine's judgment for having been actively chosen.

But Melissa also couldn't deny that her mouth turned bitter the moment she heard her colleague's words, even if they were whispered.

She would never say it out loud, not even to Barb, but that first night, after hearing that unexpected insult, the younger teacher's words remained too vivid in the redhead's mind when the lights in her room went out and she had to go to sleep.

Maybe I'm not a bad teacher. Maybe you are.

She really didn't deserve that.

The memory flashed through Melissa's brain so quickly that the teacher even lost her rhythm as she added more ingredients to her mixture, but she recovered enough to start beating the egg whites. However, the continuous noise of the mixer only made her remember how much she had thought about it, lying in her bed watching the sun rise through her window when she woke up before her alarm clock.

A bad teacher.

Sighing, Melissa thinks about how much it took for her to understand what was going on in the mind of the younger teacher back then, and then turns off the mixer and begins to mix its contents with the few that were missing.

As she spread the molds she would need on top of her table and, with the experience and speed of a chef, the redhead put the freshly mixed dough she had in her hands in a pastry bag and continued without even blinking as she remembered that little clash in Abbott.

When Janine got upset about being described as an inexperienced teacher in the teachers break room, the redhead hadn't even blink, and that was why she started teasing the younger woman.

Because, to the redhead, it was obvious that she was a more experienced teacher.

If Melissa, a teacher with over twenty years of experience, wasn't more experienced than a teacher with only three, then Melissa was doing something very wrong not only with her life but also with the lives of the children she taught. The fact that the two woman had different times to prepare and perfect themselves to where they were now, both in the same place (teaching Abbott Elementary as second-grade teachers at the same time), had nothing to do with Janine's qualities as a teacher.

Eventually, she managed to explain this to the younger teacher.

"Thank God.", was the muttered thought that Melissa let slip between her lips as she put her Savoiardi in the oven after sprinkling them with her mixture of sugar and cornstarch, automatically starting the timer.

Melissa forgave Janine because she knew she didn't mean it with all her heart. The younger teacher was foolish but not cruel. She couldn't be cruel even if she tried.

Melissa knew. But Melissa knew this because she knew Janine.

The problem was that... Y/N didn't know Melissa.

So what the hell was she going to do if the hairdresser didn't accept her apology?

And so it was over. Her mind was just taking away the possibility of a peaceful morning for Melissa. Because not even her grandmother's collection of favorite Italian songs would be fair competition for what was starting to form in the redhead's mind.

The redhead isn't someone who has a problem with someone she barely knows not liking her. Melissa sometimes even triumphs over this idea of ​​being disliked by people close to her, so someone she doesn't know should simply mean nothing.

When Uncle Archie says she's his least favorite in the family, it doesn't mean anything. It's an honor, really, and the words of her mother's brother would never keep her awake at night. And he is family.

Now among people she knows, Schimmenti loves the idea of ​​being seen as unreachable, distant and unsociable. But there is something about that hairdresser...

With a huff, Melissa simply grabbed a cloth within her reach and began to clean the counter of her sink, ignoring the insistent sound of the timer that finally went off, still lost in all these thoughts.

Maybe it's because the hairdresser really didn't deserve those words... Maybe it's because the poor woman was just doing her job... Maybe it's because the hairdresser is connected to Andrea... Or maybe...

When the smell of sugar began to intensify, Melissa finally realized that the time had passed. With a start, the redhead opened the oven, letting out a wave of heat so intense that it made her eyes water. The teacher hurriedly pulled one of the baking sheets out of the oven, her bare fingers touching the hot metal before she realized her mistake.

"FUCK!" she groaned loudly, backing away quickly, knocking the tray onto the counter. One of the cookies fell to the floor with a dry, crunchy sound, while her instinct forced her to hold her hand against her chest, her eyes watering.

The burning heat pinked up her palm like an immediate punishment, and defeated Melissa finally turned on the kitchen faucet, placing her red hand there.

"MELISSA??" Jacob's shrill voice sounded faster than she imagined. And more desperate too.

For a moment, the older teacher stood there, staring at the cookie on the floor and feeling the buzzing in her throbbing skin as she felt the flow of water. The pain was real, but it served only as a reflection of something greater. Her guilt.

“I’M FINE, JACOB!” the redhead yells back at her roommate, even though she knows that from the sounds she hears upstairs, he must be desperately putting on the first piece of clothing he can find and then coming to check on her.

By the time he appears in the kitchen, as out of breath as Janine had been running around in her early years as a teacher, the pain has already subsided. But the younger teacher doesn’t care about that, or the fact that Melissa honestly tells him that she used to get burned all the time when she was younger and that heat tolerance is in every Italian woman’s blood, as he gently rubs some burn ointment from his personal first aid kit onto her burned fingertips.

After repeating what she imagines to be a thousand times that she is fine and perfectly capable of being alone, Jacob finally leaves her alone and goes on his date, giving Melissa the space she needs to sit at the kitchen table. She doesn't want to sound insane, but the savoiardi, perfectly shaped but with some slightly over-brown, seemed to judge her silently.

With a fork and using her non-dominant hand, Melissa tried to transfer all the cookies she baked to a covered container as soon as they cooled and went to her living room.

Finishing the corrections of her students' tests with her non-dominant hand takes longer than she imagines, taking up most of her morning and afternoon. But at least she is back in the kitchen when Jacob returns from his date, with flushed cheeks, swollen lips, a sweet smile and lost eyes as he asks her if her fingers still hurt.

She softly denies it, with a smile on her face and thankful for Jacob's concern written in her eyes. He understands even the words she doesn't say, and she is also thankful for that as she grates some of the dark chocolate she will need to finish her recipe the next day and puts it in a covered container.

On Monday morning, Melissa gets up ready early.

If asked, she would say that she set her alarm to wake her an hour and a half earlier, but the reality is that her nerves did the job without the help of technology.

Calmly, Melissa took the mascarpone from her refrigerator and began to make the cream that would bring the entire recipe to life. She beats the egg whites with the egg yolk, and uses the mixer to first mix the sugar, then the mascarpone and finally the carefully beaten egg whites.

When everything was ready, the redhead took a deep breath and, next to the precious dish she had chosen, arranged on her counter the Savoiardi cookies made the day before, the grated chocolate, the mascarpone cream and began to assemble the dessert. She dipped the cookies in a little room temperature coffee, one by one, taking care to make sure they were just the right amount of wet so that she could arrange them on the bottom of that precious glass dish, creating an even base and trying to ignore how much she wished the hairdresser could see the care she put into it.

When Jacob finally came downstairs, she was already spreading the fourth layer of the mascarpone cream, smoothing it with a spatula to ensure that each part of the dessert was perfect. When she finished, the redhead noticed that it was exactly ten minutes before the time she and the younger teacher left the house every day, so the redhead took her time sprinkling cocoa powder on top delicately, as if she were drawing an invisible message to Y/N.

Forgive me. I'm sorry.

Melissa wasn't sure.

But what she knows for sure is that Jacob is practically melting with curiosity in his passenger seat as he holds the dessert in his lap.

The Italian woman wanted to rest the tray on her back seat, as she always does when she needs to take something important to school. But he asks so genuinely to carry it that Melissa doesn't have the heart to tell him to take the bus that day. Especially after his ointment worked wonders by almost completely healing the burn on her hand.

At least not inside the car, since she takes the tray from the younger teacher's hand and is the one responsible for putting it in the refrigerator in the teacher's break room.

"Oh. This is a...”, Janine's voice is uncertain as she inspects the tray that prevents her from storing her sandwich on the common refrigerator shelf, already stretching her fingers to get a better look at what it was.

“It's mine. Do you have a problem with it?”, Melissa says rudely just so that there are no additional questions, but, as usual, Janine doesn't get the hint.

“That's beautiful. But can I—”, Janine starts again only to be interrupted.

“It's not yours. So don't touch it.”

After that, a heavy silence takes over the break room for a few moments.

“She spent the whole day yesterday making it... and she even got burned... and then she was putting it together this morning.”, the youngest man in the room mumbles to his friend, not as quietly as he imagines since everyone in the room hears Jacob's words even with the news on the television.

“Did she give you a piece?” Janine mumbles back to Jacob, now curious. He shakes his head at the younger woman, purposely leaving out the fact that Melissa left a fair amount of the cream she used for that tiramisu in a small bowl, next to some of the homemade cookies just for him this morning. And that’s why Jacob gets a slap on the arm from the redhead along with an irritated look as he passes her on his way to the coffee maker to refill the dark liquid in his cup. Finally, intrigued by the younger man’s groan of pain, Barbara looks at the refrigerator that Janine still has open, trying unsuccessfully to put her lunch inside, and sees the reason for everyone’s commotion. A big tiramisu. But she also sees something that no one else does.

Something that cannot be questioned is that, out of everyone there, Barbara knows Melissa like no one else and is able to figure her out without even trying. And, with a small look at the glass dish in question, she had already figured her friend out.

That was one of a set of five glass dishes that Barbara Howard had heard about and only seen from a distance. Before her third year of marriage, the redhead's ex-mother-in-law, who was battling lung cancer although she still refused to give up smoking, distributed her most precious possessions to her family. And among them was that set that had been desired by all the women in Joe's family for many years.

As expected, four of the dishes were divided among Mary Alice's four daughters, but, surprising the redhead in a way she never imagined possible, Melissa was given the last one of the set, much to the despair of Joe's older brother's wife. Melissa's ex-husband's mother told the teacher that her talent for cooking would give a better destination for the last piece, unlike the idiotic fight that the sisters would probably start over the unequal number of the set.

Even after the divorce, the heartwarming gift was never claimed by Joe.

So Barbara knew that the tiramisu in question, taking up a huge space in the refrigerator of the teachers' break room on the first floor of Abbott Elementary, was not like any other.

"Girlfriend?" Barbara says softly to get the redhead's attention, speaking again only when Melissa's green eyes are looking directly into her dark ones, "Don't get involved in anything dangerous, please."

"I won't..." Melissa's voice no longer has the bite it had when she spoke to the other teachers, "I swear! It's just... an apology."

"For Joe?", the first-grade teacher knows she might be pushing, but she can't help but ask.

"No!", it's almost a scream, the redhead's tone of voice sounds scared and indignant, but it calms the teacher next to her.

And that, for now, is enough.

At the end of the day, with the tiramisu neatly packed and in her passenger seat, Melissa got into her car and drove to the salon where Y/N worked. The teacher's heart was beating fast as she parked and walked to the entrance, holding the dessert tightly even though her hands were sweaty. As she entered, the sound of scissors and the buzz of conversation seemed to fade in her mind. Her eyes searched for Y/N, who was distracted by a client and she didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing.

The last time she tried to talk to the hairdresser, Melissa gave her name right at the entrance and the receptionist automatically started searching through her notes for the note addressed to her, but now the redhead knew better.

"My name is not important. Just say that someone really wants to talk to her."

"Y/N!" the receptionist shouts the hairdresser's name loudly, using her vocal cords without any remorse, "There's a redhead who wants to talk to you."

“Is she hot?”, the sound of Y/N’s voice rings out from a distance to Melissa amidst a laugh, at the same time that her rhythmic footsteps echo on the floor of the salon, as if the hairdresser wasn’t exactly running, but in a kind of hurry and curiosity to know who was waiting for her at the reception.

When the Brazilian woman turns the glass corridor and finally appears in front of the redhead, with a soft smile on her face, Melissa can’t help but think that Y/N is even more beautiful than the first time she saw her.

But that smile doesn’t last long because, the moment the hairdresser’s eyes meet Melissa’s green ones, Y/N’s soft face turns into a frown as she asks harshly:

“Oh. You. What do you want?”

[chrissvalentine]

✧˖*° ࿐ day out. ⋆· ˚ ༘ *

pairing: boyfriend!matt sturniolo x reader

summary: matt takes you out and spoils you

warnings: fluff, kissing, established relationship

after spending the night at the triplets house, you slowly start to wake up in matt's soft embrace.

matt sees you softly stir in your sleep. he stays completely still and silent as you wake up, but you notice that his hands are running through your hair gently.

wanting to stay asleep, you bury your head further into matt's chest. matt chuckles at this, and kisses your forehead softly.

the two of you lie in bed for an extended period of time, with very little talking. matt can sense that you’re still tired, he keeps himself close to you so you can stay asleep for as long as you want. matt starts to kiss you on the cheek ever so gently, which to you is a great way to start out the morning.

he whispers in a gentle tone as he does this. "do you want breakfast?"

you look up at matt, and reply with a soft smile. "sure,"

matt continues playing with your hair as he speaks, "i know the perfect spot, we're going to walk and then get you some flowers. i want to take you somewhere special today, just you and me."

you can't help but grin, as you both sit up. you found matt's words very meaningful and sweet. you responded softly with a smile on your face, "matt, you don't have to do all this for me."

matt smiles and shakes his head at this. "no, i want to take you somewhere nice. i love spoiling you, and you deserve it. so let's go baby."

you blush as he holds his hand out for you to grab, as you giggle softly.

matt leads you out the door and outside, you two take a short walk around the neighborhood. after about 15 minutes, you end up outside of a florist. matt smiles at you before opening and holding the door for you and lets you go in first. the store is very quiet this early in the morning.

matt follows you and the two of you walk by the different flowers and bouquets. you occasionally stop to smell the ones that look the most appealing to you. matt just admires your presence as he follows you around the store.

there's no one else in the store right now besides the older woman running the shop, so you two have the place to yourselves.

you two walk up to the woman running the shop, and ask if you can purchase some flowers. she nods her head and turns to you before speaking up gently.

"which flowers piqued your interest love?"

you smile at her gentle tone, and point to the most beautiful coral and white arrangement.

she grabs them and heads to the back of the shop to prepare them for purchase. matt softly rubs your back up and down as he looks down at you with the most loving expression.

you two wait there for quite awhile, the woman running the shop taking a little while to prepare them. the two of you stand there patiently waiting in silence.

eventually, the woman returns with a beautiful bouquet with multiple kinds of different coral and white flowers. she charges matt $35, and she wraps it in a small box for him.

matt makes the payment as he holds onto the box with your bouquet in it. your hands are still intertwined together as you two start to walk out of the store. matt reaches his hand around your waist to pull you closer as he whispers in a soft tone. "good choice baby,"

you and matt continue your walk around the city. stopping for breakfast, attending a local farmers market, and eventually reaching a jewelry store. he buys you a necklace with a thin chain, and a little flower hanging from it that matches the color of the bouquet.

he doesn't let you see how much it costed him, but he made sure it fit perfectly by getting the man running the shop to adjust it to fit comfortably around your neck.

after that, you two continue walking around town, matt leading you to a specific landmark, where the riverfront park is. you two eventually make it closer to the park. he leans into you very softly and whispers. "we're almost there, i know the perfect spot."

you look over at him as he speaks, you give him a smile before speaking softly "okay,"

you two get close to the water, you spot a few fishing boats just on the side of the river. the breeze is extremely gentle and soothing as the sun reaches the perfect sunset.

matt holds you very close to himself, so you can still feel his warmth while the air is a bit cold. he rubs your side as he gently whispers to you. "look how gorgeous the view is,"

you watch as he admires the sunset, painting the sky hues of pink and orange. you squeeze his hand softly as you whisper back. "it's beautiful, right?"

matt keeps his gaze focused on you, as you admire the beautiful view. "it really is," he mutters as he continues admiring you.

[thatacotargirl]

The Daughter of Day (1)

My third and final active fanfiction is here! This is The Daughter of Day, a series exploring a new Court and a triad, because why not!

I hope you enjoy this introductory chapter - and keep your eyes peeled for the next instalment 🌟

This story is set after A Court of Silver Flames.

My inbox remains open for oneshot/imagine requests.

A Reader x Feysand Fanfiction

🎶 "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine - you make me happy, when skies are grey - you'll never know, dear, how much I love you - please don't take, my sunshine, away" 🎶

Helion held his newborn daughter, bundled in his arms in a yellow blanket, as he swayed gently around the nursery. He had had no intentions of becoming a father anytime soon, but when the baby's mother arrived at his doorsteps, he had fallen in love on the spot - those chubby cheeks and shining round eyes that peered out at him had captured his heart and soul.

Now, he couldn't imagine life without her.

Placing his daughter into her bassinet, watching her sweet eyes grow heavy and blinking, he set her floating celestial mobile to turn and tucked her in. Stroking her cheek as he watched her slowly fall asleep, he vowed to love and protect her for always. She would want for nothing in this life, he would make sure of that.

25 years later - Reader POV

"Y/n, are you ready?"

You can hear your father calling out to you, interrupting your reading. Grumbling, you grab your bookmark and note the page, before setting it down on the coffee table. The middle of a chapter. The worst place to stop reading.

"Yes, yes, I'm coming".

As you exit the sitting room and join your father's side, you see the look he gives you in response to your attitude. His eyebrow still raised, he stays silent as he opens the front door and gestures for you to leave the palace. You walk ahead of him and towards Xalan, your pegasus. Your father had gifted you Xalan on your 10th birthday and the pair of you were thick as thieves; much to his horror. You had Xalan wrapped around your little finger and often got yourselves into all sorts of trouble that Helion would have to rescue you both from. One time, you'd ended up in Thesan's bedroom in the middle of the night - and nearly gave the High Lord a heart attack before Helion was able to arrive and scoop you away, profusely apologising. He still apologises every time he sees Thesan for the embarrassment.

You mount Xalan and wait for your father to join with Meallan. Once you are both comfortable, he gestures for you both to take flight.

"This is a diplomatic meeting, y/n, so you have to be on your best behaviour. You are the heir to the Day Court, which means you represent the Court and me".

You don't reply. There's no need to, really. You will sit demurely and smile, speak when spoken to, and daydream otherwise of what life could offer you if you could just break free.

You had everything you could possibly want at the Day Court, your father made sure of that. But it didn't quench the desire in you to explore and see new horizons. 25 years in the confines of Day, only being able to satisfy your curiosity of Prythian by reading historical literature, was really taking its toll. You didn't mean to start acting out, but the boredom was driving you insane.

As you begin your descent into Velaris, the Night Court's City of Starlight, you can't help but notice the colours. The Sidra, the river running through the city, looked like it contained iridescent starlight. Flowers bloomed in deep blues and purples in people's front gardens. The mountain ranges in the distance seem to sparkle even in the daytime. You can hear people bustling about the streets, happy chatting and laughter fill the air.

Landing with a gentle thud before a riverfront house, you carefully guide Xalan to a stop and follow your father to a grassy sideline where the pair can graze happily. Once both pegasus' are settled, you watch your father round to the door and knock heavily.

"Helion, welcome!" comes a booming voice as the door swings wide open.

"A pleasure as always, Rhysand".

You see your father embrace the High Lord of Night as you stand behind, awkwardly. As Rhysand pulls away, he looks behind Helion to see you standing there. Helion notices Rhysand's wide eyes and turns to introduce you.

"Rhysand, this is my daughter, y/n. I thought it was time she learn the ways of the business, since she will one day take over from me after all", he laughs, guiding me to stand in front of him. Rhysand kindly takes my hand in his, shaking it gently.

"Welcome to Velaris, y/n". He smiles at you with kind eyes, which you return, before shyly pulling your hand away and tucking it behind your back.

"Helion, I had no idea you had a daughter?"

"Yes, well, I tried to keep her out of the spotlight to let her have a normal childhood; but she was getting restless in Day".

So he had noticed.

"Do come in, both of you".

Rhysand opened the door wider and moved, allowing you both passage into his home. You noticed the paintings that adorned the hallway, stopping at one in particular. It was one of your father, in the midst of the war 45 years ago, wielding his Spell-Cleaving powers with Hybern's army visibly falling in the distance. You had read about your father's role in the war, but only through reading the history books in his library. He never spoke of it, no matter how often you asked.

"Remarkable, isn't it? Feyre, my mate, painted this from a memory of your father during the war. He was a force to be reckoned with, took down nearly half the army on his own".

You turned to Rhysand with a gasp.

"Really?"

He looked at you, his face shrouded with confusion.

"He was formidable, y/n. Really, Prythian wouldn't be standing if it wasn't for him".

You turn back to gaze at the portrait, lost in thought. If your father had powers strong enough to single-handedly take down half an army, what could yours do with the right training? Helion was reluctant to let you do more than basic healing spells, worried that you would accidentally hurt yourself with your powers if left to your own devices. You could feel the power in you, strumming through your fingertips, begging to be wielded.

"Y/n?".

You turn and see your father standing in the doorway, silently beckoning for you to join him in the office. You sigh, thoughts of powers ebbing away, as you join him to discuss peace-making treaties with the mortal lands.

After you had been introduced to the rest of the Night Court, and they had gotten over the shock of Helion's 25-year-old daughter making a sudden appearance, the meeting carried on as normal. You mind wandered often, to the streets outside of the house, to the painting of your father and the power you could feel exuding from it, and you could feel yourself getting restless.

When the meeting was finally finished and you and your father had began the flight home, you couldn't help but wonder what your life would be like if you left the nest of the Day Court. And, as you watched Xalan in flight, his wings outspread through the sky - you realised it was time to spread your own.

"Father".

"Yes, sunshine?"

"I'd like to take a trip".

"Where would you like to go, my love? We could visit the continent, if you'd like?".

"A trip on my own, dad".

You can feel your father's gaze piercing you, but you refused to look up and meet his eyes.

"On your own?"

"I'm suffocating, dad. I need to live a little. Please. Just for a few weeks, just some distance from Day, so I can learn and explore and have fun like any other 25-year-old".

"But you're not any other 25-year-old, you're heir to the Day Court. You are a target".

"Then let me go somewhere where I'm not a target, where I can be protected. Please, dad".

You can feel your eyes pricking with tears, and not from the blowing wind. Your head is still bowed, but you know your father can sense them, can sense your heartache. He remains silent for a few minutes.

"I can, perhaps, ask Rhysand if he would grant you permission to stay in Velaris for a short while".

"Please, dad. Anything".

You meet his gaze and can see the pain in his face. His heart torn between keep you safe, but keeping his promise to you to want for nothing. And, it was becoming more obvious to him now, that what you wanted was to leave.

"Ok. I hear you. I will send a request to Rhysand when we are home".

[shadowfromthestarlight]

Travel Tips from a Weary Traveler:

Never reserve a non-refundable, non-changeable airline or train ticket or hotel room. Never, ever, ever.

If you are going for a hike or long drive, begin with the end in mind. Study the map. Where will you be when the trail/road ends? How long is it supposed to take? How are you getting back home/to your hotel/to your starting point? This doesn't make it less fun... it just saves you from ruining your day by being terrified out of your wits later.

Follow trail blazes, always. If you stop seeing them in front of you, you made the wrong turn. Retrace your steps and find the trail, now.

If you're going to spend a lot of time outdoors or in remote areas, always have baby wipes and a plastic bag in your backpack or car. I don't need to tell you why.

Bring more water than you think you need.

You will usually forget something. Put the most important things in your backpack/suitcase/car at least one day before the trip so that whatever you forget isn't something necessary.

Be extra kind to your pets before you leave, and when you come back. Let them slobber on you, sit on you, cuddle with you, and annoy the heck out of you.

The weather app sometimes lies. Trust your five senses and your instincts.

Stay extra about food and drink even when you're traveling. Bring your own mug. Sit in the cute cafes. Savor fresh pastries. Go where the locals recommend you go. It'll make for an overall more memorable and enjoyable experience.

If exploring a city, stay close to the downtown/the riverfront/the main street, whatever the main attraction is. Make it easy for yourself to get to all the sites you want to visit. Being in a centrally-located hotel also allows you to stop there whenever you want for the bathroom, a nap, to offload things you bought, etc.

Talk to strangers! You will learn a lot, and most people are surprisingly kind and willing to help you out.

[uzumaki-rebellion]

"Paranoid, paranoid, paranoid

Things feel out of order

Look and look around, I'm not sure of

Pair of paranoia, no

I can feel it in my aura…"

Tyler the Creator—"Noid"

Life in New Orleans dragged to a crawl for Celeste. Pure drudgery.

With Terry gone, colors didn't look as bright in the world. Food lacked taste and texture. Getting out of bed in the morning took prayers and innate willpower. Her mother sent over aromatic herbal bath salts to soak her body in. Grand-mère left Tupperware sealed containers of sausage gumbo, or fried chicken wings on her stoop that Celeste found after work at night. She acted like an addict suffering from withdrawals. Micah said she might be anemic. She thought about making a doctor's appointment.

Lighting candles and praying didn't make her feel better. Bargaining with lower-tiered saints didn't either. She spent her lonely nights sitting on her stoop chain smoking and drinking more rum punches than usual. The trilling of insects and the calls of nightbirds kept her company until she became numb and crawled into a cold bed.

Dark dreams rattled the peace of her sleep and Celeste often woke up in a sweat, paranoid that she was being watched by some unknown entity in her bedroom or outside her French doors. Her dreams were of a macabre nature with visions of walking in the French Quarter at night, or traipsing along the riverfront at sunset hearing the flapping of large wings behind her back. Terry never appeared in those nightscapes, although she caught glimpses of a shadow slithering across the ground, trying to catch up with her running footsteps. His voice called out to her, and she'd wake up hoping for daylight so she wouldn't have to lie awake for hours waiting for the sun to burn away the eerie webbing of terror that entrapped her every evening.

The worst night happened when sleep paralysis took over her body, and she swore evil shape-shifting shadows crept along the ceiling trying to steal her breath. Eventually, she could wiggle her toes and fingers and slowly regain control of her limbs. On those nights, she missed Terry's enormous body spooned around her, protecting her from the bogeyman.

To his credit, Terry called and left her messages, not completely dumping their connection cold turkey. However, he always chose times when he knew she'd be at work and unable to speak. He still professed his love for her, but he wasn't coming back soon. She left him a voicemail asking for his address, willing to make the drive up to see him, even if it had to be a quick turnaround trip. He never gave it to her.

Long summer days took over. The southern heat rolled in, and so did the start of hurricane season.

An oppressive heatwave layered itself all over Louisiana, and no matter how many cool showers she took, her body sweated buckets in the sauna-like atmosphere. The weather didn't stop her from walking or riding her bike around her neighborhood. She forced herself to stay active, visiting her grandparents more often, and attending random brunches Joyce pulled together.

Nothing filled the void of Terry, though. Eventually, his calls and text messages thinned down to an occasional heart emoji.

On a rare two days off, back-to-back, Celeste slept in and ate leftover pizza. She pulled her locs back into a high pigtail and prepared for a long meditative walk to the French Market to meet up with Joyce and some new people she didn't know. No more moping about Terry. Life had to go on and there were other fish in the Mississippi River. Blah, blah, blah.

Wiping her face with a cool washcloth, she painted on shimmery orange lipstick and added a few gold hair decorations to her locs. She broke out the lime-green summer dress and clear jelly sandals that always made her feel pretty and summery.

Locking her cottage door and the iron security door, she waved to a neighbor across the street and headed north, her feet automatically walking her toward the B&B Terry stayed at. Walking past the property, she looked at the playful statues on the roofs and stopped.

The gargoyle statue was no longer curled behind the big dragon figure. Celeste paced back and forth, craning her neck to see if the glare of sunlight prevented her from seeing it. No, it was definitely gone. She pulled out her smartphone and swiped the screen until she came to her photo gallery. When she looked at the image on her phone, it reminded her of how unsightly the statue had been compared to all the other goofy figures displayed on the roof. Maybe the owners came to their senses and realized the thing didn't match the whimsical vibe they tried to cultivate.

She carried on her merry little way and entered the Quarter, wishing she'd thought to bring an umbrella for the direct sunlight burning her skin. Passing by one of the many historic hotels, she glanced up to see a sight on a wall that knocked her breath short.

A stone-gray gargoyle fixture clung to the side of a sweltering red brick wall holding out the head of a gorgon…Medusa. The face of the creature looked exactly like the one on the B&B . Celeste walked past that part of the Quarter too many times and knew for a fact no gargoyle statue had ever been there before. She snapped a picture of it and hurried along to her brunch meet up.

She forgot about the gargoyle until two hours later when her entourage of seven window-shopped, and she glimpsed a different, more ferocious-looking gargoyle statue peering down from the roof of a boutique shoe store. Its six-foot wide flint-gray wings cast a shadow across the sidewalk. The outstretched clawed hand looked ready to snatch pedestrians off the street. Celeste shivered and nausea overtook her stomach. Acid churned in the back of her throat and she almost vomited her lunch special onto her sandals.

"Duchess, what's wrong?" Joyce asked.

She pointed at the statue.

"That was never there before."

Joyce stared at it. Celeste pulled out her phone and showed her the other gargoyle.

"This one I found on the side of a hotel. Another just like it was a few blocks from my house. It seems weird to me. I feel like I've been seeing a lot of weird shit lately."

Celeste rubbed her stomach and burped. A sour taste coated her tongue.

"I don't feel so good."

"Do you need to sit down?"

"Yeah."

The group pitched themselves up at a dueling pianos bar to get Celeste off her feet. Everyone ordered frozen mango margarita drinks except for her. She went to the public restroom and hung her head over the toilet. The sickness passed, and she used the sink to rinse away the sweat on her face.

Feeling better, she returned to her group and settled in for chit-chat and getting to know a man that Joyce brought for her to meet. The sun went down and the heat dropped by two measly degrees. She snacked on creamy artichoke dip and pita chips, listening to all the lively conversations around her until she noticed a man staring at her from the main bar. His dark skin gleamed with good genetics, and his dashing eyes zoned in on her quickly. She thought he was flirting, but his direct gaze came off predatory.

Glancing around, she pretended to take an interest in the active street life as the Quarter came alive for another night of debauchery. On the corner, a striking Black woman with a bald head and gothic make-up watched her. Her black painted lips peeled back into a slick smile and Celeste's intuition kicked in, warning her that something wasn't right about the woman. Her entire focus was on Celeste, just like the man at the…

Shit!

Celeste blinked, and the man at the bar moved toward her with a disjointed stroll. His movement reminded her of glitches in video games she played as a teen, when the operating system hadn't quite worked out the kinks. Unnatural. From the corner of her eye, she caught the slow track of a dark-brown beauty who smiled in a way that chilled Celeste in her gut. It was the smile of something trying its best to look…human. The parts of Celeste's skin that Terry once bit flared with a sharp stabbing of pain, the bruised nerve-endings waking up all the way. Her body wasn't right all over.

"I have to go, it's late," Celeste yelped.

She leapt to her feet and hugged Joyce.

"Wait, we can give you a ride to your place after we finish the rest of these appetizers," Joyce said.

"No…it's okay. I have to go to work in the morning."

"I thought you had the day off from both jobs."

Celeste shook her head and threw a ten-dollar bill on the table to help with tips. She brushed past the disappointed blind date and tried to hide herself within the crush of bodies milling around the party atmosphere. Her heart almost stopped when the strange man and woman from the bar followed her.

She ran like she was doing the fifty-yard dash in tenth grade, her legs stretching out to move her ass far.

Home.

She needed to get home, lock her doors, and hide.

Her emotions caught in her throat. Something was wrong with the world she lived in. Ever since Terry came into her life, she'd overlooked strange occurrences because she was caught up in the exhilaration of new romance and new dick. She'd ignored all the weirdness, because she didn't want to connect it to Terry. Now she even wondered about the missing white guys, Carl and Jacob. Terry did physically assault them and afterward, they went missing. The coincidence of them all interacting together nagged at her subconscious.

"What the fuck is going on?" she screeched when two twin gargoyle statues overlooked the roof of a picturesque townhouse filled with three-stories of revelers drinking and shouting down at passersby. Gargoyles were not a thing in New Orleans. It wasn't even Halloween season yet.

Celeste glanced over her shoulder to track any other weirdos following her. It looked like she lost them in the packed narrow streets. She double-backed and headed up to Rampart to bypass the Quarter completely. Flagging a taxi, she jumped in and gave directions to her house. She ducked down in the backseat and pretended to check her phone.

"Night, Miss," the older Haitian driver said.

"Mèsi," she said.

"Ou ayisyen?"

"Non, Black Creole from here," she said.

"Mwen wè…but we are kouzen, oui?"

"Oui," Celeste said.

"Are you okay?"

He looked at her closely from the rearview mirror.

"Um…I'm fine. Goodnight."

She paid in cash from some money Terry left behind and darted to her front door. Jamming the key in both door locks, she twisted them open and ran inside. She turned off the living room track lights that were on a timer and fled to her bedroom.

Sweating and panting from the exertion, Celeste sat on her bed in the dark and waited for her heart to stop pounding. After an hour of sitting, she went to the restroom, and showered for bed. Her smartphone lit up with a text from Allen, the guy Joyce fixed her up with. He left his number and told her to call him whenever she wanted to hang out.

She checked the inside lock and security bolt on her front door and back. The sour taste of liquid rose in her throat and she rushed to the sink in the kitchen and vomited up pita chips and the artichoke dip that looked like beige slurry. She rinsed her mouth and wiped her lips just as a loud pounding on the front door started.

The hell?

She peeked around the corner of her kitchen. Dark figures moved outside the colored, frosted glass panels of the top half of the front door, even though her porch light was off. The corner streetlight flickered on.

Her stomach tightened, and she held her breath, afraid that whoever was outside could hear her breathing. She stood completely still and waited. The pounding started again.

"Hello?" a female voice said. "I'm a cousin of Terry's. He wanted me to bring you something."

The lie rang hollow, but Celeste's heart softened at the sound of her lover's name. She pushed her back against a living room wall hidden by a bookcase, determined to ignore the person until they went away.

"Celeste? My name is Dominique. I'm here on vacation and Terry asked me to drop off a gift. I'm saving him thirty dollars by bringing it myself instead of him mailing it."

Dominique's voice sounded sweet and very country.

"He's coming down to see you in a few days and he wanted to give you this. I think it's a fancy dress. He said you looked real pretty at Durand's the last time you were in a dress."

Celeste lingered near the bookcase, but she stepped further into the living room. Only Terry and her friends knew about Durand's.

"You know what? I'll just leave it on the porch. Sorry I came here so late. I dropped by earlier, but you weren't home, and I didn't want anyone to steal it if I left it behind."

Celeste crept another few inches toward the front door. She lifted her cell phone out of her purse and kept the police number on her screen. The cell phone still listed it under Freddie's name as "Freddie/Work". Dominique banged on the security door again.

"Just leave it on the porch, please," Celeste called out, annoyed by the intrusion, her finger hovering above the police contact.

"No problem," Dominique said.

She heard movement and footsteps walking away. Waiting for an hour quietly, she finally cracked open the front door and kept the security door locked.

No package.

She looked down at the bottom step and still didn't see any box or bundle. Glancing at Freddie's police number, she debated about calling him.

"Hello, Celeste."

She dropped her phone on the floor, cracking the screen. The strange man from the piano bar stood at the top of her stoop, his dark, foreboding eyes mesmerizing her to the point of her falling into a dazed stupor. Behind him, one step down, was the Black goth and the dark brown beauty with the uncanny valley smile. Two other Black women in dark clothing waited on the sidewalk, watching her with sinister eyes.

The man smiled, revealing platinum grills. The dark brown of his eyes faded into silver orbs that enchanted her with their strange ethereal glow.

"We don't mean to frighten you," he hissed, his nostrils flaring and sniffing at her from behind the iron security door.

The women also inhaled deeply and licked their lips, staring at her throat.

"What the fuck do you want?" she said.

"This bitch talkin' spicy, Deacon," the Goth said.

The man tutted at Celeste, shaking his head.

"No, no, no…that's not how you speak to The Deacon, my sweet sustenance. We're here to ask you about Terry."

"What about him?"

"Where is he?"

"I don't know."

The man pounded the frame of the iron door. Celeste jumped and stepped back.

"Don't fucking lie to me, Duchess!" he shouted.

He turned his head away as if to gain control of his emotions. His lips curled into a deceptive smile.

"How do you know me? Who sent you here?" she asked.

"Let us in, Celeste," the Goth said.

"Yesss…invite us inside and we can…talk. Open the door," The Deacon said.

His silver, unblinking eyes held her in place, and the colors around his towering frame drained away. When he spoke again, his voice echoed inside her head, reminding her of the way Terry invaded her thoughts…read her mind. The canine teeth of the platinum grills elongated, becoming wolfish and frightening. Fangs.

"Let us come inside…"

The four menacing women dropped the façade of humanness, their fangs exposed and dripping with saliva. Celeste's security door had wide enough gaps to reach an arm inside, but The Deacon didn't grab her through the openings.

It occurred to her that the door was a barrier they couldn't cross without her permission. As long as she didn't verbally consent to letting them in, she was safe on the inside. But if she stepped out...they would feast.

"I smell him all over you…inside of you…open this door so we can speak of my brother without eyes upon us."

Celeste raised her left hand and flicked on her porch light. The bulb didn't emit UV rays, but it improved her visibility and momentarily distracted them... long enough for a shadow to stretch across her doorway.

Celeste gasped and touched her cheek. It felt like Terry's hand had stroked her skin with the warmth from his palm.

"Fucking bastard!" The Deacon shrieked.

He glanced back at the others.

"His sentinel is here...watching over her," The Deacon said.

He slammed both of his palms on the two middle bars of the security door.

"He will come back here for you, and when he does, we'll be waiting. Tell him he can't hide from us forever."

The Goth woman sniffed the air and bared her fangs at The Deacon.

"The Old Ones are near. We have to go!" the Goth yelled.

The Deacon glared at Celeste and her eyes watered. She blinked once and the strangers at her door vanished like they were never there. Her body swayed and the sound of loud flapping wings above her cottage rang in her ears. Something landed with a thud on top of her roof and walked across it with heavy footsteps. She slammed the front door shut and locked it again, cocking her ear toward the ceiling, listening for whatever new monstrosity awaited her.

Luckily, it didn't stay long. She stood staring at her ceiling with bated breath and a thundering heart rate. The hairs on the back of her neck tingled with familiar urgency. She turned around and looked at her French doors.

Terry's shadow darkened the curtains.

She walked with slow, trance-like steps toward the French doors and stared at the outline of his body behind the thin drapes.

"Are you there?" she asked.

Her voice sounded so weak and helpless.

The shadow didn't answer, and Terry's voice didn't go into her mind. That shit had been real. The first time it happened at the dive bar, she thought she had been drunk, horny, and imagining him talking inside her head. The dawning realization of what he truly was terrified her. Behind those drapes was proof of an abomination to humankind.

And she let it into her home.

Slept with it.

Let it feed from her, thinking it was some fetish kink. Just some deep hickeys and love bites that got his rocks off.

Fucking hell.

She whimpered and held her hands in a prayer position against her lips.

"Are you here with me… Terry?"

She reached for the doorknobs and unlocked them, flinging both doors wide open.

A sleek black cat sprinted across her small courtyard and leapt onto the neighbor's fence, blending into the darkness and out of sight.

Chapter 10 HERE.

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[oldguardleatherdog]

The Night Before the Tribute In Light

September 10, 2003

I.

One month ago today, this long-forgotten photo suddenly popped up in the photo app on my laptop. I took this photo with my Sanyo clamshell phone on September 10, 2003, 21 years ago tonight, from Hudson River Park in Manhattan.

Don't ask me how it survived all these years or where it's been stored all this time or how in the world it could have found its way to me from the long-dead storage servers of a long-defunct cell phone carrier. We're in the penumbra of The Anniversary, and time is out of joint.

I had been back in New York for about a month (after getting violently run out of the place I was staying by a fellow who is now one of my closest friends), homeless and living in that roach-infested HIV crack-house shelter at 96th and Broadway that I describe in "The One Decent Thing I Ever Did" (it’s archived on this blog), and you can imagine my state of head and spirit at this moment, the night before the 2nd anniversary of the terror attacks on the World Trade Center that drove me from my home in Lower Manhattan, four blocks east of the site.

I was sitting on a bench in Hudson River Park on the West Side of Manhattan, somewhere near Houston Street, maybe ten or fifteen blocks north of World Trade. I hadn't noticed these beams of light as I walked, and I think they might have just been activated while I was sitting there. As I recall, it was a full moon in Virgo, and I was positioned just right to snap this shot. I had *no* idea what this was all about, as I recall, but I thought the image was so striking and affecting that I wanted to capture it.

As it turns out, this was the tech run-through for the first September 11th installation of the “Tribute In Light”. Here’s Google’s AI summary of this remarkable memorial:

So there I was, just two years after the blast, stunned by this sudden, mysterious apparition rising from just south of what was still a giant, messy hole in the ground. I was still not fully myself at that time and would not regain my full memory or sense of who I was until the following January (therein lies a tale!), and as I recall I was just numbly stunned, not knowing what to make of it.

As I write, I’m getting the physical sense memory of that moment: the dog in me (my medulla oblongata speaking) feels his hackles rise, it’s not what I expect to see filling the hole in the sky, is it another attack? Do I bark at it, sound an alarm, run towards it, away from it, why is there light there, is this some unholy ruse, another trick being played on me from that big smoky hole where nothing but poison has spilled out for the longest time?

My phone rang. It was a fellow that I had met and hung out with in San Francisco while I was stranded there, and I was stunned to hear from him, especially at that moment. “Hi Dave… well, right now I’m on the riverfront looking at the damnedest thing… [I just wanted to make sure you were ok] hey, thanks for checking in… yeah, take care bud.” I closed the phone and started walking south along the riverfront, toward the light beams.

When I got there, I saw the massive banks of klieg lights assembled in their arrays, a strange and unfamiliar (unwelcome) echo of the shapes and the placement and the footprints of the place I loved so well.

The faces of the artists who surrounded the lights were intense, focused, sober. I still didn’t quite know what was going on, but there was profound reverence in the air, on those faces, at that place, as the beams of pure white light soared upwards, past the point of naked-eye discernment, unending, likely petering out tens of thousands of feet off that spoiled piece of ground, perhaps piercing the ionosphere, did they get clearance from the Federal Aviation Administration for this? Are pilots being disoriented by these columns at 45,000 feet? Do they touch the feet of God?

II.

And I kept walking south, my back to the light,

Down to the oldest part of the civilized island,

Past the Battery, the bronze bull, the buttonwood tree,

The Port of New York dead ahead,

The Staten Island Ferry terminal, ramshackle, ancient,

Entry restricted by terror tape and armed sentinels

No two uniforms alike, a panoply of enforcement,

Heavy weapons at the ready, so jarring in my neighborhood,

And the working dogs with the keen snouts, the trained muzzles,

Jumping up to paw at the brown bag in the soldier’s hand

Is that peanut butter? Apple? Hunk of cheese?

Let’s play! You’ve been so serious, so worried,

You smell sad and scared, are you lost? Let’s play!

Even Cerberus needs break time, belly rubs, treats!

For the first time in weeks, I smile to myself

As I round past the ferry, those strange lights at my back.

Hope I can sneak past the turnstile downstairs,

I won’t have to hike back up three hundred blocks

To that awful low place. Did you know roaches bite?

They shit on you too. Try to sleep, fully dressed,

Watch cap pulled low on my head, long sleeved shirt

Buttoned up to the collar, heavy pants tucked in boots,

Gloves on my hands, one more night without food

Half-bag of speed takes my mind off the pain

Sleep comes in fits if at all. – On the train

Dreading the stop: ninety-sixth street and Broadway.

Tomorrow, this city will jack itself off

In performative weeping and gnashing and cursing

Oh, how we loved them! I snort in derision,

You didn’t lose nothin', you pieces of shit!

Let the dead bury the dead. Beams of light

Don’t feed this refugee reeking of ashes -

What, do I smell bad? So sorry to stink up

The place where you’ve laid out the feast for your friends

Who still have their jobs, their high homes in the towers

Behind the glass doors where your larders are stocked

With the food that you bought with your government money

That flooded your midtown Manhattan apartment

With all the new clothes, electronics, the sausages

Fresh from Enrico’s, Zabar’s, D’agostino’s,

Bought with the Victim’s Fund money you stole

When you filed your claim. “OMG, it was awful!

“I couldn’t get up to the fifty-fourth floor,

“I had to find shelter on Upper Park Avenue.

“Power was out. I was homeless that night!

“So glad that my friend who was shopping in Gramercy

“Gave me the number to call for my claim

“September 11th was horrid! I told them

“I couldn’t go home for two nights! Oh, thank God

“The claim got approved with a wink and a nod

“And no one’s the wiser – I’ve never been south

“Of the Plaza Hotel! That all happened on Wall Street,

“Who goes down there? Jesus Christ, are you kidding?

“That’s four miles away! Christopher, are you coming

“Or what? Reservations at Nobu won’t wait

“For you or for me, so quit primping!”

The pain

In my stomach, relentless. My gorge won’t stop heaving.

Am I gonna make it? Damn, *ouch!* What the fuck…

The tooth that I hoped would hold out just gave way,

Fuck me. Another huge hole in my grille.

When I made six figures and lived in a high-rise,

Fuck buddies laughing on Saturday night,

Nobody told me that one hundred minutes

And two hijacked jet planes would make such a difference.

No one will laugh with me now – my best friends

Are yelling and angry, how dare I show up

Sweaty and toothless, a walking reminder

Of September tenth. No, I’m not gonna feed you.

III.

Now, twenty years later, they’ve retooled their memory:

“Animal! Damn, dog! We’ve missed you, you know,

“Wow, you’re alive! You look fabulous! Listen,

“I never gave up on you. Give a call

“When you come to the City. I want you to meet

“My beautiful husband – he remembers you too!”

IV.

Twin beams of light where the Towers were anchored,

Okay, not exactly precisely those spots,

But who’s gonna criticize? Look and recall

How majestic they were. Yeah, the new One World Trade

Is cool, I suppose – no one mentions the absence

Of Two World Trade Center. Insurance, you know.

Not enough money or civic ambition,

And Bloomberg discouraged it. Why add a target?

“Don’t you think sixty or seventy stories

“Are more than enough? Hell, let’s just get it done.

“The sooner we finish construction, the better.”

V.

*There will never be lumens of adequate volume

Sufficient to seal that hole in the sky,

But the hole in my heart I will finish, I tell you.

Walk with me as I go forward. Tomorrow

I’m back in the studio. Tonight, we can play!

You smell like apples and – damn, is that chocolate?

(our light beams shine upward forever)

"Good boy!"

Animal J. Smith

San Francisco, California

September 10, 2024

[artists-ally]

I have a Harvey request if you’re taking them! He’s dating an UES socialite who actually cares about the world and people and isn’t the stereotypical aloof type. He tries to buy her a fancy gift (jewelry/bag/whatever) and she tells him to return it and he gets upset. Thank you!!!! 🩷🩷🩷

{Affection} Harvey Specter x Reader

Hey babes!!! Yes I am always taking Harvey requests!!! NGL I had to google what that meant and I hope I did this right 😭 Enjoy!! Title from this song.

Word Count: 1,400

Warnings: language, mild angst, fluff

Tagging: @rosedpetal @bbyanarchist

~~~~~

For the past six months, ever since Harvey closed that deal with Smith and Klein, he has had a crush on their public representative, Yn. She is just… she is so pretty. And damn good at her job. She was responsible for representing his client and spreading word about their business on social media. 

But she was just different from the other upper east side assholes in New York. The way she talked and carried herself was enough to catch Harvey’s eye. 

In the last few weeks she’s been at the firm, trying to renegotiate the deal. Harvey took the opportunity to ask her out. To his surprise, she actually said yes. And their date that night had been lovely. At a quiet, riverfront steakhouse closer to where she lived. It was intimate and was a night filled with laughter. 

But there was just one problem. 

She never kept any of the gifts he gave her.

____

READER POV

I scoffed. Was he serious? The blue Tiffany box sat on my desk, its obnoxious blue bow staring right at me. I flicked open the note.

Yn, maybe these are more your style. See you tonight for dinner – Harvey.

What a shallow dude. Was his ego bruised so badly by my three other rejected gifts that he had to send me a fourth? How did one of the smartest men in the world not get the hint? He was good at his job, at closing deals and stirring up trouble, but he seriously couldn’t accept the fact that I didn’t want any presents?

I just sighed, sliding it in the drawer in my desk until later. 

It was annoying enough when he bought me the first set of earrings, giving them to me on our second date. Way too early for jewelry, for one. Second, what was I supposed to do with them? To me it was nothing but a gesture of utter disrespect. Did my time mean so little to him that all he thought to get me were earrings? 

The watch was way worse. And the necklace with matching earrings was just horrendous. Sure, that does it for some girls, but I am not the type to wear it just to make him happy to see it around my neck. Diamonds and glitter can only do so much.

It was nearing our anniversary and clearly we were still not on the same page. Sure, were they pretty? Yes, but that wasn’t the point. 

After I sent my last email for the day, I wrapped my jacket around my shoulders and headed out of the office, tiny blue box in my hand. 

_____

“Don’t you look lovely,” Harvey grinned, accepting my kiss with more than a little enthusiasm. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too,” I smiled, stepping through the door as he held it open for me. “Thank you.” “Of course.”

We were seated at our regular table immediately, the box, which I had stuffed in my purse now burning a hole through it. I caught Harvey looking at my ears, and anyone else would’ve missed the way his eyes dimmed. 

“Good evening, what can I grab you guys to drink?” The perky waitress asked, flipping open a notepad. 

“Just water for me,” Harvey said, scouring the menu.

“I’ll do an iced tea, no lemon please,” I decided. 

“Okay, I will bring those out for you in a few minutes. Take all the time you need to look at the menus.”

She bounded away and I took a deep breath. Any second now.

Harvey tapped his fingers on the tablecloth. He looked… tense. Then again he always looked tense. But this was a different type of discomfort. 

“You’re not wearing the earrings I gave you.”

Here we go. 

I just sighed, “Look Harvey, I-”

“You don’t have to be condescending.”

I paused. “What?”

“I think you’ve been planning on breaking up with me for a while now so just get it over with.”

I couldn't do anything but blink at him. My brain might’ve actually disconnected from my mouth. “Harvey, where on earth did you get that idea?”

“Well, what the hell else am I supposed to think?” Harvey’s eyes were wide, voice barely below shouting. “You don’t ever want to come to events with me, you’re hardly willing to go on dates. You clearly don’t want any of the gifts I keep giving you since you’ve given every single one of them back over the past few months. But you also won’t tell me what to get you so every time I go shopping, I feel like I’m blind. I have no god damn clue what it is that you like.”

“Because you don’t ask,” I shrugged, looking at the menu again. 

“What are you talking about?”

“If you ever bothered to ask, you’d know the answer."

“Well, I do ask. And every time you give me the same response.”

“Have you ever asked me why?” Harvey just stared at me, brows furrowed together. “As I was trying to say before, it’s not that I don’t think the jewelry is pretty-”

“Then what is it, Yn? Because clearly I am doing something wrong or you’re just fucking with me,” Harvey sighed, and that sad, defeated look crept into his eyes. 

Guess I'm just going to have to be blunt.

“I don’t give a shit for the jewelry,” I said honestly.

“But- but why?” Harvey threw his hands in the air. “It’s some of the best money can buy.”

“Which is precisely why it bores me. You can only say so much with a pair of earrings and a necklace, Harvey. To me, it screams lazy and mindless. Anyone can get anyone a pair of earrings.”

“Well, what do you want? Anklets? Ear cuffs? How about-”

“I want conversation,” I explained, setting down the menu and really taking him in. He was still. “I want good, meaningful conversation. I want thoughtful gifts like a new bookmark or a little porcelain cat you saw in a window and thought it looked like mine so you bought it for me.”

“You don’t have a cat.”

I couldn’t suppress my glare. “That’s not the point. Harvey, I like you a lot. And I do think you’re great, but you aren’t seeing me. You aren’t looking beneath the surface, you’re just going off your past instincts of what girls like. I’m not those girls.

“I am not a complicated person. Surprise visits and late night drives me more to me than anything you could ever buy in a store. I like being spontaneous and going to new places. And before you even think about it, no, I do not mean booking an all exclusive resort in Jamaica and flying first class. I want to go to museums and grab lunch on the way at a little cafe. To discover hidden gems in this city and make actual memories, not collect material ones. 

“I like authenticity. And I don’t know anyone who is more themself than you are, Harvey. That is what I like about you. You are not afraid to show your personality. You are unapologetically yourself, and I love that about you. But you haven't given me the chance to show that side of myself."

Harvey took in a big breath, nodding in understanding. 

“I am looking for something real. For you to really understand me and what makes me happy.”

“I get it, and I’m sorry I never thought of it that way. Most of the women who I’ve dated in the past tend to go for the biggest, boldest, baddest diamond on the shelf. I started getting offended when you kept sending the jewelry back. I couldn’t figure it out no matter how much I thought about what to get next.”

I smiled, reaching for his hand. He placed his fingers in my palm. “I am not a materialistic person. Earrings and necklaces mean nothing to me. Just a piece of sparkly rock that I’ll probably lose at some point. Or break.”

“So what you’re saying is I should just never buy you anything expensive ever again? Perfect, saves me more money to take you on all those vocations you don’t want to go on.” “Oh hush,” I giggled, easing at the sight of his smile. “Not that those things aren’t nice, I just don’t appreciate them the same way others do.”

“I understand,” Harvey said. “So, would you like to get out of here and go do something spontaneous?”

My heart swelled. “I’d love to.”