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saving-word-crawls · 2 months ago

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Good Omens Crawl

By: anon3009908

As requested by some people, here is a Good Omens crawl! Based on the show, because I was hoping that would keep me from making an epically long crawl as I knew the book would. (That failed.)

Angelic and Demonic Interventions (written as miracles below, to save time). Collect these to skip challenges as you need! But be careful, Heaven/Hell will take notice at the end of the crawl. You don’t want them to take notice.

We expect you to do every. single. step. Unless it says to choose, or optional, or you use a miracle.

There are times where a (#) is added. This is specifically for people like @riverdoe, who request torture. You are welcome, my friend. Everyone else, don’t worry about it unless you really want the challenge.

Here is a dice roller 40, for those who don’t have them in arm’s reach.

Episode One.

Time: the Beginning. Place: Garden of Eden.

Time to tempt humanity and really change the course of everything and anything, Crawly Crowley!

Write for ten minutes, distraction free and at your own pace as you convince Eve this is a good idea.

Take this number and divide it by 10 for your WPM. Keep this number in mind for the entire crawl.

It didn’t take much. She ate it, Adam ate it. They did a wrong. Time for their escort out, Aziraphale.

Write WPM x 10 words in fifteen minutes to resist giving up your flaming sword. **Failed: Well, they need it. She’s expecting already! **Succeed: Good, temptation averted. But… it’s dangerous out there. And cold. And what would the harm be, really? (+1 miracle)

On top of the wall, our two “heroes” meet. He’s the enemy, but what exactly does that mean right now, other than thwarting? And there’s nothing to thwart at the moment. Angel and demon have a conversation.

Word war against your angel/demon at a length of your choice. ** Win: You won! The conversation! Congrats! (+1 miracle) ** Loss: Time well spent, was it?

Time for a time skip! Eleven years before the End.

Hastur and Ligur are waiting for you, Crowley. You’re late. Why were you late? [Choose one, or flip a coin.]

Taking down the mobile network for all of London!: sprint to the next 500(0)

Taking down the mobile network for all of London after having breakfast with the angel (just don’t tell them that): sprint to the next 1000(0)

Hastur and Ligur aren’t amused either way. They give Crowley his next job. A baby. To swap!

Baby Swap!

There are three babies, see? Baby A, baby B, and baby the Adversary, Destroyer of Kings, Angel of the Bottomless Pit, Spawn of Satan and Lord of Darkness. Time to swap the babies!

Baby taken from the Dowlings: 3 digit challenge

Baby Destroyer of Worlds: write d20 x 100(0) words

[Optional] Baby superfluous, will have a prized fish collection: pick any song and write without stopping until it is over.

Unknowingly having already cocked up the situation, Crowley calls Aziraphale to let him know what’s going on. They meet up to discuss the coming apocalypse. Or get drunk. Or both!

Discuss the apocalypse: Write 666(6) words or 999(9) words (if you’re feeling plucky)

Drink: Ask your angel/demon what word war length they want to do and do it. ** Fail: do another one, do them all until you win ** Succeed: do another one, but it’s okay if you lose, you’re drunk (+1 miracle)

Once the two are on the same page, it is time to convince your supervisors about what you’re doing.

Crowley: “I’ll make this Antichrist really bad, count on me.” Sprint to the next 666(6).

Aziraphale: “But what if we make him good?” Write to the next palindrome.

Now that they have permission, it is time to get hired by the Dowlings! That’s not hard, just make them want you. [Choose one, or both]

Nanny: Write for twenty minutes as you get this damned baby to sleep.

Gardener: Write your WPM x 15 as you figure out plants.

TIME SKIP. Eleven Years Later.

The boy seems normal. Aziraphale and Crowley don’t know what to make of it, other than how do you stop the apocalypse? You kill the boy, of course.

Argue about who should kill him.

Do a carrot and stick challenge 19 if you think Crowley should do it, being the evil one of course, good people don’t murder, right?

Visit the word-eater’s dungeon 25 if you think Aziraphale should do it, because the Antichrist is evil so why would Crowley do it?

Meanwhile, the actual Antichrist has grown up well. His name is Adam. Adam is a good boy and the leader of the Them, because he comes up with the best games. Time to have fun!

[Do any of these you want, if you do them all +1 miracle.]

Adam: Go to the Writing Challenges 12 part of the forums and look at the sixth challenge. Do that one. If it’s a crawl or too long, look at the next one down. Just keep going down.

Pepper: Join the next NaNoWordSprint on Twitter/Discord! If unable/unwilling, sprint for ten minutes.

Wensleydale: Write your WPM x 15. Try to do it in 15 minutes!

Brian: A fifty-headed hydra.

Being eleven is great.

Birthday party.

Time to release the Hound! But also have an excuse to be at the birthday party.

Crowley, you have to help with the catering. Without being super obvious. Why are you wearing that suit so well? 1k sprint for being so fly, you devil.

Aziraphale, you have decided to entertain. You are probably the most entertained by this magic. Write for thirty minutes as the show goes on too long.

Hellhound, you are off to find your master. It is your master’s birthday. You will be anything he wants you to be.

Adam: “I’ll name him Dog. Saves a lot of trouble, a name like that.”

Do a 3 digit challenge to do someone else’s word bidding!

Armageddon is on its way now! With Dog, a good boy.

As Dog isn’t with Warlock, that means Warlock isn’t the Antichrist. Crowley? Aziraphale? It is time to panic. And while you are panicking, write your WPM x 5 to at least panic usefully.

Episode Two.

A deliveryman makes his way in sun, rain or snow! Because you are also a good boy. First delivery is that of an ancient sword. To a war correspondent with bright red hair.

WAR: Take your WPM. Multiply it by 60. Get to it, soldier. (If you manage in less than an hour, +1 miracle.)

1656

Witchfinder Thou-Shalt-Not-Commit-Adultery Pulsifer. You have an unfortunate name. You are also looking for a witch. (One probably cursed you with the first name.)

Head to the Carrot and Stick 19 thread, but that stick better be a big one.

Agnes Nutter. You know what you are going to do. You saw it coming.

Because you’ve seen in coming, write to the end of the scene, where you blow something up. Or not.

Agnes leaves behind a book. The history of “The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch” and the professional (and unprofessional) descendants.

When Anathema Device is seven, she draws in the pages of this book, which apparently no one in her family had done before.

Write 300(0) words if the thought makes you cringe.

Write 1k if you have drawn in a book before.

DO BOTH IF BOTH APPLY.

When Newton Pulsifer is nine, he takes down the power in the entire block by trying to be a computer boy.

Write a % of your word count as you attempt to computer. [3% if you are 50k or below, 2% between 50k and 150k, and more than that? 1%.]

In present day, Anathema has come to Tadfield to find the Antichrist. With a lot of tools, including the Book, to try to find him. It’s all chance~

Write d6 x 100(0) words while searching through a book already memorized.

Write d6 x 5 minutes searching through Tadfield.

While searching, Anathema meets the Them. The Them are as eleven year old as eleven year olds can be, but pretending to be witchfinders is more adorable than worrisome. Get a number from the 3 Digit Challenge and write that while the children switch off who is to be “tortured”.

In present day, Newt has come to an apartment to find Shadwell, who has offered him a job as a Witchfinder Private. Answering the door is the… landlady?

Madame Tracy: “Seances are on Tuesdays, unless you want other services.” Write for ten minutes, assuring Madame Tracy neither of her services are necessary.

Fortunately she sends you to Shadwell. Did I say fortunately?

Shadwell: “Always make sure to ask how many nipples they have.” Write 500(0) words as this is confusing, but damn if Newt still needs this job.

This is confusing, but it’s better than Newton telling his mother that he got fired from his computer job.

A 15 minute word war to work through the guilt! ** Succeed: This job’s not too bad. Crazy, but not too bad. (+1 miracle) ** Fail: This job is crazy, but it’s a paycheck. Do another word war.

Back to our “heroes”, Aziraphale and Crowley return to where the hand off of the Antichrist had occurred, a corporate paint ball retreat. Crowley doesn’t make a good argument of not being nice.

Do all of these you want, dependent on how nice you think Crowley is:

Clean off Aziraphale’s jacket. Write 100(0) words.

Argue with Aziraphale about being nice. Write 300(0) words.

Turn all the paintball guns into real guns, but make it so everyone has near misses and no one dies, because Aziraphale would be upset (though the excuse is “it wouldn’t be fun”.) Write 600(0) words. [If you do them all, +1 miracle.]

A fire got rid of all of the evidence. Neither angel or demon are happy. Who is less happy is the cyclist who is hit by the Bentley. Time to fix what’s more important!

Aziraphale: fix Anathema, write WPM x 10.

Crowley: fix Bentley, write for 20 minutes.

Anathema worries about being in a car with two strange men, but she is dropped off. One calls the other “angel”. Oh, so she was safe the entire time.

Write 500(0) words as Anathema forgets Agnes’ book in the back of the car.

Crowley drops Aziraphale off at his shop, only for the angel to notice what was left in the car. A book of prophecy. No, the book of prophecy. Aziraphale barely hears anything that Crowley has to say.

This is the big one. Write your WPM x 30 as Aziraphale reads every. Single. Prophecy. In the Book.

Episode Three.

THE PAST

It’s time for a flashback. Many flashbacks. It’s time to get to know an angel and a demon. [For every challenge you do below, you get a CONNECTION. Keep track.]

Noah’s Ark. Watch the spectacle of the Ark as it starts to rain. Rain is familiar. Write your WPM x d10.

Crucifixion. Aziraphale and Crowley watch the Son die. Fifty Headed Hydra. There is no winning.

Rome. Food isn’t necessary, but it’s good. Who’s tempting who? Write to the end of your current scene.

Medieval England. The two realize they cancel each other out wherever they go. Word war against your angel/demon for 10 minutes.

Shakespeare. Time to flip for the arrangement. Roll a die (of any type) and visit that challenge in the Writing Challenge 12 topic. [You may reroll if you get another crawl.]

France. Aziraphale nearly gets beheaded for crêpes, but fortunately Crowley shows up. Sprint to the next 500(0) words.

St. James Park. Crowley asks for some water. Holy water. This causes a fight. Word war against your angel/demon for 30 minutes.

Blitz. Caught up in a Nazi plot for books of prophecy, Crowley saves Aziraphale again by blowing up a church. Take your time to write to the next palindrome, because. This sort of thing takes time.

[Tally up your CONNECTIONs. There is a possible 8.]

The Heist. Crowley is all set to steal some holy water, but Aziraphale saves him the trouble. “You go too fast for me.” Take your WPM. Multiply it by 100. You can choose to divide it by your amount of CONNECTIONs. (If you don’t and you have at least 6, +1 miracle.)

Back to the present. Anathema is crushed, losing the book her entire life has revolved around. Adam and Dog want to cheer her up. Talking about being an occultist and the environment definitely distracts her for a bit.

Write for 45 minutes to learn about all these things an eleven year old in Tadfield never would have heard about before.

Anathema gives Adam plenty to read about it all. There are a lot of magazines , and a lot of topics to cover. Here are some of them!

Whales. Sprint 300(0) words.

The Amazon. 3 Digit Challenge.

Atlantis. Get a drink and write until you’re done with it.

Nuclear Power Plants. Visit the Word-Eater’s Dungeon 25.

And if a nuclear power plant vanishes, who is to know? Everyone. Everyone is to know. How could they not?

Shadwell has an army of witchfinders! Like Private Milkbottle and the like. And now his two very wealthy benefactors both have a request for him to give his best agent: the newly recruited Newt.

Crowley’s request. He looks just like his father, Crowley. Imagine that. And rather vague instructions. Ask someone else for an amount of time to write for and write for that long.

Aziraphale’s request. He calls with explicit instructions. That’s much more defined. Ask someone else for an amount of words to write and write that many. Newt is sent off to Tadfield. Because Private Milkbottle is dead. Write 300(0) words.

Aziraphale talks with his superiors about, hypothetically, what would happen if they lost the Antichrist.

Gabriel: “Doesn’t matter! The War is coming either way!” Write your WPM x 5.

Sandalphon: “Doesn’t matter! The War is coming either way!” Write your WPM x 10.

[Optional] Uriel: (Why the fuck is he talking like this?) A fifteen minutes word war as Uriel is more on the ball.

The best boy, the deliveryman, finds the second recipient of this order. A set of scales for a man called Dr. Raven Sable, diet doctor extraordinaire.

FAMINE: Take your WPM and multiply it by 30 Either write that much or for half an hour, whichever comes first. (If you manage the WPM in under 30 minutes, +1 miracle.)

Episode Four.

The Them are worried about Adam. The world is worried about Atlantis and the Kraken. [Choose one.]

Them: Take a moment to write your current scene from the perspective of another character.

World: Sprint d6x100 words.

Gabriel knows that Aziraphale isn’t a really good employee, but it’s not like they get to choose in Heaven. Michael has doubts about his loyalty though.

Gabriel: “I’m sure there is a good explanation.” Write for ten minutes.

Michael: “It isn’t hypocritical to work with hell to find out if this other angel is working with someone from hell, because he’s the traitor and I’m just thorough.” Write to the next palindrome.

Crowley sees that everything is falling apart and tries to convince Aziraphale into leaving earth and the entire mess behind. [Do at least one.]

Phone. Word war for 5 minutes.

Bandstand. Word war for 15 minutes.

Street. Word war for 30 minutes.

If you lose any, you are Crowley, losing each time. Take a break, because this sucks.

(If you win all three, you gain +1 rather angelic miracle. Not that Aziraphale feels it.)

Good Boy delivery man has a crown to give to someone in his own stomping grounds of Tadfield.

POLLUTION: Sprint to the next 5k. If that is more than 2.5k, write for ten minutes afterward. If it is less than 2.5k, write for 30 minutes.

And the last. It’s a message. A delivery man works through rain, snow and shine. And…

DEATH: Write a % of your word count as you face DEATH. [3% if you are 50k or below, 2% between 50k and 150k, and more than that? 1%.]

Newt is on his way to Tadfield when he is stopped by aliens. And then people popping out of the ground, causing him to crash Dick Turpin. Write 200(0) words.

The Them find Newt and help him out, but it’s time to get him to someone that might help. Like the local occultist, Anathema!

Write for 20 minutes as four eleven year olds help a grown man walk to Jasmine Cottage.

Anathema was expecting this. Of course she was. As the Them leave, Adam starts acting strange, as strange as the weather.

Write WPM x 10 as the Them follow their leader, but are becoming more scared.

Newt wakes up and is filled in by Anathema. Things he can’t believe, but they keep happening as she says. Including the bad weather thing.

Write 1k as Newt and Anathema share… a moment.

Meanwhile, Shadwell feels guilty for leaving Newt to deal with a witch on his own. After the pin in his map on Tadfield starts shooting out and burning the paper around it.

Word war for 10 minutes while searching for money to get to Tadfield. **Fail: Not enough money. Time to get some from one of the benefactors… the southern pansy. **Succeed: Still not enough money. Of to A.Z. Fell’s for money. (+1 miracle)

Elsewhere, the long forgotten once-thought-to-be Antichrist is shipped to Meggido for where Hell wants Armageddon to start. Hastur realizes that Crowley has tricked them and he and Ligur go for sweet revenge.

Crowley, it is time to defend yourself. Here comes the holy water!

The classic bucket on door trick, set it up by writing for the duration of a song of your choice.

Fill up the most dangerous weapon of all - the plant mister - by writing for 5 minutes.

It worked on Ligur, but Hastur is still around. Write till the next 1k while bullshitting to Hastur about how this was all a test.

Aziraphale calls, but it’s not the time, however it does give a good idea of trapping Hastur in the answering machine.

15 minute word war. If you win, +1 miracle, but either way Hastur is stuck.

Aziraphale can’t believe where everything is going, so wishes to speak to the Almighty to clarify everything. Go above his superiors heads, as they might say. But Metatron is the only one to answer.

Write 150(0) words, failing to make the point to Metatron, who summons Aziraphale to Heaven.

Shadwell arrives and believes Aziraphale a demon. While trying to keep Shadwell from entering the summoning circle, Aziraphale steps into it.

Write a minute for every letter of your favourite word.

Aziraphale is gone. Shadwell has accidentally set the bookshop on fire. Are we reaching the darkest hour yet?

Episode Five.

Aziraphale’s message brings Crowley to the bookshop, which is engulfed in flames. He thinks Aziraphale is dead, while he is simply incorporated and in Heaven.

Word war for 15 minutes while Aziraphale refuses to take part in the war. (+1 miracle) **Succeed: Time to get back to earth. Which means possession. Angelic possession? **Fail: Write another 100(0) words to get away.

Finish the scene you are on while Crowley soliloquies in a bar. Fortunately, Aziraphale shows up to snap him out of it. They agree to meet at Tadfield’s Airbase.

However, the FOUR are finally together. Try to find three other people to have a word war of your desired length with. Choose what place you will make: 1st, 2nd, 3rd, or 4th. (If you make that spot +1 miracle.)

Madame Tracy is having a seance, when Aziraphale drops in.

Sprint to the next 333(3) as Aziraphale clues his new body in as to what is going on.

Then sprint the same amount of words as both Tracy and Aziraphale have to explain it to Shadwell.

Crowley is on the road to the airbase, but the M25 is on fire. Because of Crowley. Of course.

And now Hastur is here. Things keep looking up. Time to drive through the wall of fire! Write 666 words to hold everything together while Hastur burns up.

Adam is all powerful, but Pepper, Wensleydale and Brian aren’t having it. Write for 25 minutes as they finally get Adam to let them go.

As they escape Adam makes chase, go to the word-eater’s dungeon 25. Do not feed the beast, slay it! (If already slain, write the same amount as was needed for the last time it was slain.)

When Dog wants nothing to do with him Adam returns to himself, realizing what he has lost. The Them forgive him while writing d10 x 100(0).

Adam says he has to stop what he has started. The Them get their bikes.

The first to arrive at the airbase are the FOUR. They get in very easily. Nothing to stop them, they can change the world around them as they will. There are important computers here. They take charge of them. Of all the computers.

War. Join the next NaNoWordSprint on Twitter/Discord. [If unwilling/unable, sprint for 20 minutes.]

Famine. Write your WPM x 15.

Pollution. Do a fifty-headed Hydra. (+1 miracle if it’s a success)

DEATH. Go to the Writing Challenges 12 part of the forums and look at the sixth challenge. Do that one. If it’s a crawl or too long, look at the next one down. Just keep going down.

Newt and Anathema drive to the Tadfield Airbase.

Newt tries to get Anathema to step into his Dick Turpin joke. Write for ten minutes for each letter of that name.

Episode Six.

Next to arrive at the main gate are Shadwell and Madame Tracy (and therefore Aziraphale). Getting in is another problem.

Word war for 5 minutes as they argue with the gate keeper. (Is the entrance to the airbase on the eastern side?)

Crowley shows up. His car is on fire. Young man, your car is on fire.

Write for 3 minutes and 15 seconds (or to I’m In Love With My Car) for the Bentley’s swan song.

The Them arrive and reality lets the Antichrist in. Everyone follows. We’re at the end now, write your WPM x d20 to wind down and prepare.

The confrontation comes on two fronts. Inside, Anathema and Newt are left with what the FOUR have done with the computers, setting every nuclear code ablaze. The world will have fallout in less than an hour. Much less.

Write 700(0) words.

The Them confronts the FOUR. But before that, Aziraphale and Crowley are going to try to kill the Antichrist. Which turns out to be more of a fight between Aziraphale and Madame Tracy.

Word war against someone new for 5 minutes. **Succeed: You don’t kill the Antichrist, because killing children is wrong. (+1 miracle) **Fail: You still don’t kill the Antichrist, but now you have to do another word war. 10 minutes, this time.

Adam decides that Aziraphale and Madame Tracy shouldn’t be two people and writes to the next palindrome to fix it.

The FOUR won’t be ignored. One must confront humanity’s creations.

War vs Pepper. Join the next NaNoWordSprint on Twitter/Discord. No matter the length, you must win. Repeat until victorious.

Pollution vs Brian. Do 1k in 10 minutes. If failed, write in ten minute intervals until you reach your WPM x 10.

Famine vs Wensleydale. Sprint to the next 5k. If it is more than 4k, write for ten minutes afterward. If it is less than 4k, write for 45 minutes.

A prophecy gives Anathema an idea. “He is Not that Which He Says He Is.”

Write a die roll (of your choice) x 666(6) to make the nuclear launches come “faster”.

By being completely incompetent with computers, Newt saves the day. Or at least the world.

The day is still in trouble.

DEATH and Adam. Write a % of your word count as you face DEATH. [3% if you are 50k or below, 2% between 50k and 150k, and more than that? 1%.]

Anathema comes out and sees the people who “stole” her book. Crowley returns it, but that leaves Aziraphale with a prophecy.

Write 150(0) to grab the paper out of the air.

And all seems well and fine, but Heaven and Hell aren’t happy. They send their representatives to talk Adam back into the apocalypse.

Gabriel and Beelzebub tag team Adam by being patronizing terrible people. Write your WPM x d6 to withstand it until Aziraphale comes up with a question.

Aziraphale and Crowley ask if the Great Plan is the same as the Ineffable one. Word war for 30 minutes. **Succeed: It’s a CRITICAL HIT! (+1 miracle) **Fail: Still a CRITICAL HIT! (Just less magical.)

Who isn’t happy about this development? Benedict Cumber- I mean Satan. Satan isn’t happy. Aziraphale tells Crowley to do something about it, or he’ll never talk to him again. So Crowley does something.

Write 666(6) words to stop time and talk Adam through what’s about to happen.

Faced with Satan, write until the end of the scene as Adam says all he needs to say. “You aren’t my dad.”

And who is to arrive but Adam Young’s real father. Only father. Write for five minutes as the group has to split.

[optional] This means baby B never actually existed, right? So there’s nothing to worry about? Write 100(0) words to stop worrying about this. (+1 miracle)

And this is the end, all has gone well.

A package has arrived for Anathema, that she and Newt open. Agnes wrote more prophecies. Write to the next 500(0) as Newt convinces Anathema to burn the book, retiring her too from being a professional descendant.

Madame Tracy has made Shadwell a meal, but one they share together. She suggests retiring together. Write for d20 minutes as Witchfinder Sergeant Shadwell (retired) agrees.

Adam is grounded and the Them come to see him. He assures them he is fine. He is only a human boy, after all. But he can still change things. And steal apples. Go get something to eat or drink. Stretch your legs.

The world will keep turning and there will be more time to write.

But here we are. At the end.

How many miracles you got? Careful of which face you wear.

There is a possibility of having 18 miracles. We have three challenges coming up. You can only use a max of six for each, so choose wisely.

So Crowley is to be tried in Hell, while Aziraphale has the same in Heaven.

They are together when Heaven and Hell comes for them. Take someone’s last three digits and multiply it by six. Write that many words as they drag Aziraphale and Crowley away. [You can divide the amount up to six with miracles.]

A bathtub of Holy Water to submerge a demon. Write ten 15 minutes word wars or fifteen 10 minute word wars splashing around in the tub. [You can remove up to six of the oars with miracles.]

A pillar of Hell Fire to consume an angel. Write to the next 6666 that is at least 1k away to just stand in the fire (and maybe make faces at the angels watching). [One miracle, -1111. Two, -2222. Three, -3333. Four, -4444. Five, -5555. Six, sprint to the next 1k.]

Aziraphale and Crowley meet up afterward and swap back their bodies. They go to dine at the Ritz and for the first time ever, a nightingale sang in Berkeley Square.

Write to this song 6, or for three minutes. The world is saved, and so are you and your angel/demon.

Thank you for doing this crawl, I hope it got you lots of words. I’m cheering for you!

Thank you to @riverdoe for brainstorming with me, and thank you to @HannahCT forthe wonderful thread that helped me write this 4.

#multiple routes #word crawl #word crawls #good omens word crawl #long #extreme crawls #good omens

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